#And nothing else gets done
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spiraling
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#gojo satoru#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#the minute i realized how tg coded the composition n colours were i decided to turn it up to 11#i was racking my brain trying 2 figure out how to get the layered tissue paper look tht i talked abt ishida's cover art having#cycled through all my usual layer modes n nothing ws Quite right#until wouldnt u know it . divide n subtract!!!!! i NEVER use divide or subtract bc theyre impossible#but fr this??? its like they were made for it oh my god#it makes the greys look translucent n all my textures pop in a way that makes them appear splotchy n Bruised#which ws the whole point thts the Look god i am so PLEASED#when the layer modes tht notoriously get No love finally find their niche <33 peace and love <333#filing this away fr later i am going 2 have a lot of fun with this new information i think#im very happy w how the colours look n i dont think anything else wld have kept the right Mood#but i am always so >:/ when i have to use a palette tht forces me into giving megumi blue eyes#had to set aside th green eyed megu agenda fr the Aesthetic unfortunately#anyway i knew from the minute i saw it that i wanted to do smth involving the opening panel of 268#bc that panel is S tier#i figured tht if nothing came 2 me i wld just redraw it as-is bc it's alr so good but as i ws sketching i was like#u know what u havent done in a while? art tht looks like u r going Insane#art tht makes ur family ask whether everything is ok#so i once again tucked megumi's knees up 2 his chest and apologized insincerely to him fr making the third megumi angst piece in a row#:)
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woes
#my art#digital art#illustration#drawing#artists on tumblr#clip studio paint#sketching#comic#?????? LOL#just joshing around. sorta not really#this is how i srsly spend my time#i psyche myself out of drawing anything important#bc i think i won’t do well#but the low stakes temptation of drawing girls love just for me#now that’s very easy to draw and it turns it good and then nothing else gets done
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dear god it’s hard to end fics. anyway that’s finished, now i can go back to rp.
#Part of the reason I don’t often write fic is because when I do I enter a catatonic state of living and breathing that fic#And nothing else gets done#anyway I just gotta give it a final proof read and then I can post it#— out of !
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("Always. Continuously. With increasing apprehension, and decreasing hope. I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this." -- paraphrased from The Beatrice Letters, Lemony Snicket)
#svsss#bingqiu#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#lbh#sqq#i've been working through the series of unfortunate events and somehow that series has paired really nicely with svsss#the themes of cycling violence and what's justified and what isn't and what can possibly be done differently#and how trying to bring love and honour into the midst of it really changes nothing but also changes everything#it's just *chef's kiss*#i don't know how i can quite do my thoughts justice but i've spent the past few weeks quietly going between the two series (and mdzs and tg#as well if we're being honest they all hit similar questions and themes) and just reveling in the pain and ambiguity of it#everything is interconnected and it means you can never know what trauma and pain and necessity has shaped a person#each story goes too far back to ever ever EVER possibly see the full extent of it#at that level even communication itself is nearly impossible.#and because of that it's almost impossible to change anything. beat yourself apart and the outcome is the same#and yet ATTEMPTING to change things ATTEMPTING to do the kind thing the honourable thing is absolutely critical#because while you can change nothing you also have the capacity to change EVERYTHING#aaaaaaah i don't even know what i'm saying#but i read the beatrice letters today and the love letter just. killed me.#(obviously i cherrypicked some lines because it's three pages long but those ones felt right)#''i love you like a corpse loves a vulture's beak'' i just. can't get over that line.#to be completely changed. altered. destroyed. redeemed. purified. desecrated. reduced to nothing yet entirely necessary for another's life.#what a FUCKING line#anyway i was either going to blow up from thinking about it or else i had to exorcise it via art from an entirely different series#i've already done svsss and discworld why not throw a series of unfortunate events into the mix#i'll be honest folks i did not expect svsss to be the mxtx series that would fuck me up the most about the main ship#bingqiu is something else. i don't even know how to begin to approach my feelings on it. impossibility and necessity all at once#bizarre#my art
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Having adhd is like being stuck in rooms with no exits and then told by neurotypicals i should have just done like them and walked through a door
#im just a bit frustrated today#there were things i wanted to get done today but instead ive just been sitting in my chair waiting for my brain to allow me to do SOMETHING#like literally ive just been sitting#nothing else#stuck in my head trying to at least do smth i enjoy#like i wanna draw#but nooooooo my brain had to load for 2hours before i could do even that#adhd#neurodivergent
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ok but the real tragedy of assassin's creed will always be the spiralling domino effect that underlies the series and that every protagonist is fundamentally just a pawn in a bigger game they'll never see and that they'll never be able to change because they are just a single piece of a puzzle which also means that every single tragedy that had happened to them doesn't matter to the predetermind bigger picture because it always had to happen the trauma was just collateral you can't escape it. altair watched his family die just so he could pass on a key. ezio's watched his family die so he could deliver one message that wasn't even meant for him. kassandra watched centuries rise and pass and empires crumble because she was only needed to pass on the staff to someone else.
#assassin's creed#i get back into assassin's creed#i start having a existential crisis#nothing messed me up more than the entirety of assassin's creed 2 happening because the alien gid people had one short message for desmond#and then they were done with ezio the universe was done with him he wasn't needed anymore he just decided to stick around anyway#or eivor going to that cave in America but refusing to go any further because she KNOWS deep down its just for somebody else
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Time and Time Again comes back tonight!
Thank you all for being so patient with me, I know it was a long hiatus.
My health was struggling, my arm was (is) hurting, and I decided it wasn't worth it. I'd rather be slow!
So thank you for giving me that grace, and I hope you'll be there with me for the rest of the series.
#like straight up. it's not worth it. idc how many people get mad at me#i would rather work fuckin. anything else than maintain this impossible schedule and keep hurting myself#if thats what it takes to do comics full time. then i can't do comics full time. simple as that!#i hope that for my next work i can have a healthier schedule and still make this work as my job#but if not. I'm never going back#i can't do it. 3 more years at this pace will take my ability to draw#anyways. its really good!!!#like genuinely i can feel a marked improvement in my skills#which is WILD!!! And I'm extremely happy about that!!!#just one more step into being better built to give people the quality stories they deserve.#ive not properly had the fire under my ass to finish stuff up but. its fine.#like i said? not worth it.#if i have to pause again then ill pause again. like i literally simply can not my body can't handle it#so. hopefully stuff goes smoothly but whatever happens will happen#whatever will be will be#i keep getting distracted lmfao#im excited about it coming back#and also. will. probably be distracting myself...#other creators dont read their comments. I'm like straight up not capable of that LMAOOO#i check for comments like all the time#love seeing em. love reading people's thoughts about my work#it makes me a better writer and keeps me connected to what matters most. which is my audience!#so i dont regret doing that but also. jts extremely distracting#i get straight up nothing done on big update days#cause im in the comments absolutely massive eyed refreshing.#this sounds obsessive. and it is. no jk#its just fun and keeps me in touch w peoples perception which helps me learn to write better#plus people are nice and ask me questions that i wanna answer#or if someone is being an ass. then i wanna tell them to leave (cause i cant block people) cause i consider it my responsibility#time and time again
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Always wanted a Scizor in my party when I played Pokemon Crystal, but I didn't have any friends to trade with to get them.
Original sketch/color:
#art#first time really painting in this style but i had fun#furry#painting#scyther#scyther fanart#scizor#scizor fanart#Pokemon#pokemon fanart#digital painting#traditional sketch#not sure if theres any interest in seeing more#but had fun working on this#and just looking to do more for myself if nothing else#small blog#small artist#honestly anytime i get excited for something ive done it gets almost no notice#thank you anyone who interacts#i read every tag#and it means a lot to me
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Side effects of wearing your Kaiju suit too often ,,,, Part 2
#narumi gen#kn8#kaiju no. 8#my art#kn8 spoilers#idk if this actually needs a spoiler tag since it's mostly AU but eh#if nothing else my tags need a spoiler tag lol#biblically accurate narumi i have created him#himm always watching#I like the idea that when all his funky 1 eyes close you can barely see them#want him to walk around like a normal little guy#and then something catches his attention and bam#suddenly eyes everywhere lookin around#I also think the sclera of his normal eyes might do a colour change depending on if he's in normal boi or 1 mode??#idk i'm still workshopping this a little lol#the hoshi10 merge i had figured out in my head weeks before i drew him but this literally just happened sdkjfhsf so ......#I would pay money for a proper reference picture of 1 because there is so much of the design i don't get sigh#will probably have reno done tomorrow as well he's almost there ehehehe just need to clean up a little#kaiju boyfriens all together <3#I wish i could have incorporated his suit more :c#i like to think of this au as the suits actually merging into their bodies + some funky kaijufication#but the 1 suit doesnt have any cool features like the 10 tail ;;#except for the spine i guess which i will defintiely use but stillll
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we need to make suggesting someone skip the first three seasons of mash as taboo as suggesting someone skip the ninth doctor
#killing biting maiming etc#if they're not your thing fine. whatever. you're wrong but it's fine#but if nothing else you're depriving new viewers of vital context that makes later emotional arcs more impactful#like. why should you give a shit about the first ten minutes of welcome to korea if you don't know who trapper is#hell you wouldn't know who hawkeye is!! the first episode is first for a reason it's there to introduce you to the characters + setting#or even the season 2 opener would be a better place to start since that's just the pilot done better#i won't pretend the early seasons are perfect but saying mash got good after season 3 is. well frankly it's stupid#this debate has been done to death but sometimes i'll see a take and go hang on did we watch the same show or do you just not get satire or#mash#my posts
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So, you are telling me that Jaskier used to wear outfits the color of the sea in Season 1...
That he constantly complains about his feet hurting, or struggling with keeping his footing while having to wear boots (is the problem his actual boots or a lack of early practice in life?!)...
That he got all excited at the thought that Geralt might catch him a fish to eat...
That a huge part of his identity and the pride he takes in himself is tied to his singing voice and abilities...
That his songs have been described as having the power to sing a king off his clothes...
That helping his best friend in the whole wide world bathe after rubbing soothing chamomile onto his lovely bottom is typical friendship behavior to him...
That he vulnerably asked for Geralt to get away for a while with him, and head to the (west?) coast, in the hopes that he might be able to prove himself a worthy [travel] companion (works whether you interpret the interest as romantic or queerplatonic).
And then he basically implied that (returning home with Geralt?) might be what would please him most.
That the very first thing he did after Geralt returned to him and got him out of his cell in Season 2, is take off his top and jump into the freaking nearest body of water!
That he's hypersensitive to the way people on land start stinking after a while (including himself), and will openly suggest they should bathe (or downright bathe them himself)!
That he talks with animals...
That you had him fall in love with a human prince in Season 3...
... then had him sing a song about a human prince that falls in love with a siren to Ciri right before you had him go meet with said prince, share his first kiss with him, and make love to him in a woodshed!
... only to show a clip from "Sirens of the Deep" revealing that the Netflix version of Jaskier is from
Bremervoord
a.k.a. The vassal state of Cidaris and one of the places that goes the furthest west into the sea on the Continent!
Bremervoord, with an economy running primarily on pearls fishing.
Bremervoord, the place where the story of Jaskier's Season 3 song, "A Little Sacrifice" takes place...
A place where a prince (though I think it's a duke in the actual short story) meets a siren, falls in love with her, and willingly leaves his human life behind to follow her at sea.*
*according to the song, at least! And I'm not sure it ends well for the prince of the song, because that part about him sinking to darkest night sounds a bit ominous if you ask me... The book's short story has a different conclusion.
You're basically telling me that Jaskier comes from a place on the coast that goes far into the sea to the west, a place where merpeople and humans occasionally interact, and that he didn't really feel like talking about where he's from, because he felt like the only way for him to ever be able to "become himself" was to leave his home behind...
... AND YOU EXPECT ME NOT TO LATCH ONTO THAT POPULAR MERMAN!JASKIER THEORY?!
OR INSTINCTIVELY START DEVELOPING A BUNCH OF HEADCANONS ABOUT IT?
For example :
What if Jaskier keeps repeating that "he's just a bard" not because he's actually dismissing how good, influential, or powerful he is...
... but because he chose to give up his tail to permanently become a human, and he doesn't like to be reminded that he doesn't quite "fully belong" with humanity, because there's something a bit different and "unique" about his singing.
What if, growing up as a merboy, he'd kept feeling like he was born in the wrong body and with the wrong species given his brethren's attitude about singing as an artform.
What if when merpeople sing, they typically rely on pure melodies without lyrics, and argue that only humans and other species of the land - with their inferior vocal capabilities - must rely on something as primitive as words and lyrics to inspire emotions and make ideas take root into other people's minds.
What if they do have a singing speech pattern, but when it comes to artistic expression, the songs are purely melodic.
But Jaskier, after listening to some of the folk songs that the local bards enjoy singing by the fire at the beach, often accompanied by a lute or other instruments, fell in love with the way the words of those songs flow and sound.
Perhaps he revealed himself to Essi then, and that, instead of being scared of him, she agreed to show him how to play the lute, speak her language, and sing the way humans do.
And when he did fully grasp the beauty and the power of using verbal poetry into songs, he knew he could never look back.
What if Essi was the first person to ever really see him for who he was and treat him as family, hence why he loves her like a little sister.
Maybe "the Lettenhoves" are basically a group of merpeople with no actual blood relation, that lost their own families and were rejected by them when they chose to make the full transition from merperson to human.
By pretending to be blood relatives, they've managed, however, to realistically pass as a large human noble family, acquire a bunch of lands and estates over the years that is passed to each new generation that wants them, and each new member is given a certain amount of money when they become one of the Lettenhoves to begin their new life on land!
They aren't extremely close, because they each have their own lives and personal ventures (very few go into singing careers), but they are still people that understand what being a human born at sea feels like, and that will be there to offer each other help and support if need be!
And so, Jaskier was able to go study at the University of Oxenfurt and learn as much of the human world and its arts as he could!
But, while his voice remains a bit more powerful and influential than most humans that were born on land, that influence comes with a "curse"...
Most people that instinctively fall under the charm of his melodies (note: Jaskier can use his voice to make an audience more susceptible to anger and annoyance when he sings, too. An especially useful skill to have when you're relying on food being thrown at you to eat... Hence why Geralt's lack of emotional response to his singing when they met was so intriguing!) will typically only care about how they make them feel, rather than how Jaskier himself was feeling when he wrote his songs.
Geralt, Yennefer and Ciri are all immune to his siren charms - and dwarves appear to be more resistant as well - but, while his songs inspire people, and hearing him sing them "live" with his actual voice tends to make people become instantly infatuated with him (or immediately hate him, should Jaskier wish to repel rather than attract them)...
... they rarely ever see him or seemingly attempt to connect with him on an intimate, emotional level, like they would with another human being.
And so, every time Jaskier is reminded of how much influence he appears to have over how people see the world when he uses his voice, Jaskier's tendency to remind them that he's "just a bard" is because he wishes people would connect with his humanity, too, rather than what he can do.
Regardless of him being able to pass as someone that was born on land and started his life in a fully human body, he knows that his voice will always carry some remnant of his siren abilities.
And that this difference appears to be preventing him from emotionally and physically connecting with other human beings that weren't born at sea like him, the way he wishes he could.
And so, that's why he was initially hesitant to sing for Radovid, and he kept insisting that he wasn't in a "singing mood" that day.
Because he knew that, the moment Radovid heard his singing voice, he might stop listening to him and trying to connect.
But there was something in the way Radovid insisted - while asking for Jaskier to pick his favorite song and showing a sincere curiosity about listening to what pleased him most - that made Jaskier ultimately choose to risk it.
And, while Radovid was obviously affected by the sound of his voice (to the point where he felt the need to pretend his speechlessness was caused by drunkenness), it was also very clear that he'd been listening.
Not only was his gaze very sharp and his eyes clear and bright while Jaskier was singing - seemingly attempting to analyse every note and word - but, for once, the things Radovid was complimenting him about weren't related to his ability to make people feel and experience things...
For once, what Radovid was claiming made Jaskier so special wasn't the beauty or power of his voice, or how catchy the melodies of the songs he'd sang to him were.
It wasn't even about how Jaskier's lyrics had made him feel.
He'd told Jaskier that what made him so special was his ability to see people for who they really are rather than who they pretend to be.
He'd essentially told him that his ability to truly comprehend those around him was his gift - that he had a unique ability to connect with them at the core... the very thing Jaskier had always felt that he was lacking.
And when Jaskier pushed him for more, all Radovid told him was that he didn't know yet, but was determined to figure it out.
"You connect strongly with others and my desire is to understand and connect with you."
That is what Radovid had taken away from who he was, even after having heard him sing, and Jaskier couldn't help but feel like he'd found a kindred spirit in that human.
Someone stuck in a world and a birth family that simply couldn't understand and accept him as he was - constantly hiding parts of himself to survive.
Radovid had then agreed to help him with the whole situation with Rience - despite the fact that Jaskier hadn't used any song to attempt to suggest he should, just genuinely asked for his help.
And - if that hadn't been enough - that prince had gone one step even further by asking him if Geralt knew how lucky he was to have him, after Jaskier had been singing about his self-worth issues when it came to relationships and his fear of never being good enough - or human enough - for a fellow human (or mutated human) partner.
He'd been listening to him.
He might have been born on land, and he might not have been immune to Jaskier's siren abilities, but Radovid still hadn't lost sight of who he was, nor been tempted to start obsessing about owning him or treating him like a prized possession.
And so, Jaskier tentatively begins to allow himself to hope...
Until Radovid does something truly unexpected that none of his prior human, elven or dwarven suitors or lovers had ever done before...
Learn his song.
Sirens are typically immune to the power that another siren's voices carry... until they fall in love.
One of the ways to know if a fellow merperson is alterously or romantically drawn to you is to sing back one of their own melodies to them, and see how they will respond.
Should they feel that instinctive, near irresistible pull towards the melody, and vice versa, then the two sirens will often start trying to discover and explore different ways they can learn to harmonize and use their voices to complement each other's, and create new shared melodies that will resound through the sea.
And, for the very first time in his life, Jaskier finally understands how people feel when they listen to him sing.
Despite the fact that the "siren's melody" being sung back to him is a human song he wrote, with human lyrics, accompanied by human instruments...
Despite the fact that Radovid himself is most definitely not a siren but very much human - fumbling a bit with Jaskier's lute, visibly nervous, too shy to allow his voice to rise above a whisper...
To Jaskier, it's the most beautifully mesmerizing "siren's melody" he's ever heard in his existence! It's filled with warmth, love, understanding, a promise of unconditional acceptance and safety...
It's absolutely intoxicating, he can barely breathe, feels like he's on the very edge of losing his sanity, and it takes all the power he has to avoid launching himself right at him!
And if a human can make him feel this way singing back to him a song filled with poetry and lyrics - rather than a classic, traditional siren's melody - then maybe there's never been anything wrong with Jaskier or the way he's always preferred to sing!
His people made him feel unwanted, but the sea never did! It probably would have been welcoming to a lute-playing merman singing like a bard, if his people hadn't been such close-minded arses!
Jaskier feels at home on land and has never once regretted his choice, but maybe he still has a right to also be a child of the sea, regardless of him having ultimately chosen a pair of legs over his fins!
And maybe Radovid would love to see parts of his old home some day - even if they can only access the surface of it, rather than go explore everything hidden in the water's depths (unless Yennefer has a spell that would allow Radovid to breathe under water as he does. Because Jaskier would never trust a sea witch with Radovid's life!).
And if Jaskier himself can be mesmerized by Radovid's song and feel like he would let that man lead him anywhere and do whatever he wants with him, without any desire to own and control him; maybe he'd simply been trying to connect with the wrong people.
Radovid is the first person he's ever met that seems to be able to connect with both the human and the siren part of him. And when Jaskier offers to help him work on his lute playing and singing, what he's truly saying is that he wants them to learn to harmonize their voices together and create their own melodies...
It's an intimate need Jaskier still has, and he's finally found himself a mate that appears to fully get him, and be able to fulfil those needs.
Of course, then the whole mess with Cirilla happens, and for a moment there Jaskier loses faith that any of it was ever real!
Who was he kidding!? The Redanian Intelligence kept insisting that they knew everything about everyone! Maybe they'd figured out Jaskier used to be a merman, done their research, noticed that Jaskier "fancied" the prince, and instructed him to surprise him and trick him into lowering his defenses, by courting him the way a fellow merman would!
He really should have known!
But then, when he finds Radovid alone, lost, and hiding, he realizes that Radovid had never meant to trick or hurt him.
Radovid had just been genuinely afraid, and trying to deal with the threat of a looming war as best he could by seeking Ciri's help.
And now, the war he'd attempted preventing from happening had begun, he'd clearly internalized Jaskier's earlier blame, and that spoon of a man was sufficiently bonded to him by now that he might just allow himself to be captured and killed if he doesn't do something about it!
And then, Jaskier himself might end up symbolically 'washing ashore' somewhere and letting himself die of heartbreak, for fuck's sake!
Because merpeople are dramatic as fuck and they feel the loss of friends and family in a way that's devastatingly sharp. Being rejected by a queerplatonic or romantic partner - or having them die on them - is the worst type of injury one could inflict upon them!
When he'd sung about having also survived, no thanks to Geralt, he'd fully meant it! That loss had nearly killed him!
If he wants to survive this, he needs to figure out a way to keep Radovid safe, and then make sure that Geralt and the rest of his family are safe also, because he doesn't know how he'd manage to continue to live in this world if the war ends up taking everything from him in a way where all hope would be lost of ever getting any of them back!
#Jaskier#Radovid#Radskier#Geraskier#Merman!Jaskier#My Posts#My Thoughts#Seriously Netflix why did you do this to me!#I'm supposed to be trying to get shit done right now to prepare for the new dance session starting next week#And finishing writing those WIP fics#And answering to a bunch of stuff (haven't forgotten about you#@my-jokes-are-my-armour#I swear!)#NOT having a little merman!Jaskier gleefully swimming and running around my brain hijacking everything and ensuring nothing else get done!!#Fucking hell!#Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?!
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who's pulling the strings of the puppet king?
#lies of p#lies of p romeo#king of puppets#lies of p geppetto#fanart#digital art#hi hello do you think romeo was fully conscious when geppetto enacted law zero (?through him?).#i think about these two a lot... i don't tend to jump straight to the 'deal with the devil' part because there's something about--#--two people with nothing in common but the empty space between them. world's worst grief bonding situation!!!#and there's something a lot more compelling about that to me. and that's not even mentioning the grand covenant in the room--#merits its own post or something else. (because i think about it more than anything ever.)#tl;dr i would kill carlo myself if i got to witness them having the most painfully unpleasant conversation ever had by two people.#anyway i should comment on art process too huh.#the gist of it is if no one got me i know red and black got me.#it's my Old Reliable. i've been nearly gnawing my hands off from. not managing to get anything done in a way i liked so i went back.#i feel better now.... :-)#anyway. worst in-laws ever <3
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He's mostly done, i'll probably add more to this piece next week :3
#but for now since i have nothing else to post u get to see him again lol#i plan to add some more details later i just dont know exclty what#but hes mostly done so posting nyow hehe :3#wip#work in progress#art#astarion#bg3#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate 3#baldurs gate 3 fanart#fanart#painting#my art#arin moss#arin moss art#astarion fanart#astarion bg3#astarion baldurs gate#astarion ancunin
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You know what day it— V-Tamer?! Happy Odaiba Memorial Day! 🎉 And Happy 25th Anniversary V-Tamer! ❤️ [Odaiba Memorial Redraw 2022] [Redraw 2021] [Redraw 2020]
#Digimon#Odaiba Day#Odaiba Memorial Day#V-Tamer#Screenshot redraw#My art#If it wasn't V-Tamer's 25th anniversary this year I might've done Zero Two (since the movie's happening) or something else#But I like those nice round anniversary numbers so I figured I'd take advantage of it while I can#Which is also why I didn't do Savers this year#To be fair some seasons have overlapping anniversary years so I can't do nice round numbers for them all#At least not without skipping years lmao#So this will just have to do-- but it's fine besides we love and appreciate V-Tamer in this house#This bizarre story just continues#I'm gonna have to start making that calendar bigger so I can fit everyone in there 'cause it's getting cramped#It's funny how all these redraws despite my attempts look nothing like each other
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It’s crazy how expendable all the crew members were to the Pony Express.
A 30% chance that your shipment would be lost. Cargo and crew are inseparable if we are to believe the shitty layout of the Tulpar. People use it because it’s cheap. The labor is cheap. The lives are cheap.
They are all relatively easy to forget about. It’s implied Anya and Curly don’t have many friends or much family to be concerned about them back home. She mentions nothing and no one to fall back on and he feels like wasted his life with the company. Jimmy probably only has Curly, otherwise people wouldn’t care or ask. Of course Daisuke and Swansea have family’s but Swansea thinks poorly of his and Daisuke’s poorly of him. All people in the companies eyes that wouldn’t stir up too much trouble if they became part of the 30%.
It makes it so much sadder because that ladder they were climbing was so small and shitty. There were rungs, ranks, but even the highest was barely off the ground. Jimmy wanted to reach the top of something that was brutally cut off and knocked everyone else off just to not see it.
#like yes curly was slightly better off but he’s not getting a severance package he’s a top show pony to the company#but they will just shoot him if he becomes a horse with a broken leg#Anya was likely picked cause she had enough knowledge but not enough to concretely call malpractice and Swansea was already a cog in the mix#he was an alcoholic getting back on the straight n narrow he needed it Daisuke is forced on the trip and eager to prove himself#Jimmy also need the job and got it from nepotism and won’t care as long as he’s paid#complains but yknow and Curly likely doesn’t do much but work he’s like a perfect little face man and he kinda hates it#like it’s a misconception that he was bored at the top or he needed a new ladder because he was done with this one he literally is miserable#and feels like he unfulfilled and doing nothing with his life as he’s ONLY successful in his work like he has nothing else#which makes it so mad cause Jimmy saw Curly as this guy with a perpetual golden goose but he’s just like them#like shiny gold appearances aside he’s like the second saddest like next to Anya because shes like depressed#because yknow she’s a victim but she had hopeful and happy determined prospects like Curly is just sad with his life and Swansea is chilling#like he’s made his peace even if he’s not like clicking his heals and Jimmy is less sad more angry#he’s a sad mans tho like he’s like Dan vs to me#mouthwashing#the pony express#mouthwashing game#nurse anya#anya mouthwashing#captain curly#curly mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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ok im going to bed bc its late as hell here but i wanted to doodle parkciv finally
#here in artist civilization#parkour civilization#parkciv#little details in this i like are the shading differences in evbo and seawatt#seawatts shading is how everyone looks but after becoming god i like to think evbo like. just has flat almost cel shading#like hes insanely out of place. and his shading does NOT react to whatever lighting hes in. and he looks soo weird bc of it#evbos eyes go from green to tinted with the netherite purple :) based on a fic i read :) i thought it was neat :)#his stupid idiot protag ahoge turns into a weird halo thing.. uhm what else#oh yeah seawatt has a clock stuck on the back of his neck.. think like uhmm the idea that moles are where you died in a past life#but its LITERALLY a mark of how you died. like it can be anywhere on the body but its a mark of how you died. so seawatt has a clock bc#you know. The Race.#SPEAKING OF SEAWATT DETAILS post-revival he has like. no eye colour. its blank#his eyes are still clearly defined but its still Nothing There#if he was the first to be revived itd freak people out but i imagine evbo was dragging his feet when it came to seawatt#parkciv evbo is a hater at his core what can i say. well to me he is#ok done yapping my cat demands i get off my pc and sleep so she can yell in my face
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