#And instead of putting effort into figuring out why that is
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BLENDER || lh43
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summary: Love was never the problem-but distance, doubt, and heartbreak were. You tried to hold on. So did he. But when love stops being enough, what's left?
based on the song BLENDER by 5SOS
warnings: arguments, emotional tension, swearing, miscommunication, jealousy, confrontation, desperation, uncertainty, breaking up, heartbreak, emotional limbo, unresolved feelings, basically all the basic angst stuff lol
notes: holy shit, this came out of nowhere ngl... this is my longest fic yet and I love it so much. shoutout to my 5sos girlies, this is for you (mostly me though 🤭)
word count: 6,410
The fight had been over for an hour, but your phone was still buzzing.
LUKE: can you just pick up?
LUKE: i don’t want to end the night like this.
LUKE: please.
You stared at the screen, thumb hovering over the notification. Your body still felt tight, wound up from everything you’d just screamed at each other. The distance was getting to both of you. Maybe it had been from the start.
This was supposed to be easy. A summer fling that accidentally turned into more.
You met Luke last July, when the air was thick with humidity and the nights bled into each other without much consequence. You didn’t think twice when it started—just a guy and a girl caught up in something fun, something fleeting.
But then August came, and instead of ending things, you found yourself tangled in his sheets, whispering promises neither of you had planned to make.
So now, months later, you were here—staring at his name on your phone, wondering if loving someone like this was supposed to feel like free-falling with no parachute.
Another buzz.
LUKE: i’m calling.
The screen lit up with his name, and you swore under your breath before finally answering.
“What?”
A beat of silence. Then, his voice—tired, frustrated, but still laced with something soft. “You actually picked up.”
“I figured you weren’t gonna stop until I did,” you muttered, shifting in bed. Your voice came out flat, but you weren’t sure how else to talk to him when your heart was still beating too fast from the argument.
Luke exhaled sharply. “I don’t get why you’re acting like I don’t care.”
“You don’t get it because you’re never here.” The words slipped out before you could stop them, raw and aching.
His silence was louder than the words themselves.
“Y/N…” He sounded exhausted. “You know I can’t just—”
“I know, Luke,” you cut in. “I know you have a career. I know you can’t just drop everything for me. But I’m tired of feeling like I’m the only one trying.”
“That’s not fair.”
“Isn’t it?” You sat up, gripping your blanket. “I call. I text. I make time. But when was the last time you put in the effort? When was the last time you planned something instead of just squeezing me in when it was convenient?”
His breath hitched, like he wanted to argue but didn’t have the words.
The silence stretched.
You should’ve let it sit. Let him stew in it. But instead, your voice broke when you whispered, “Do you even miss me, Luke?”
The question must’ve hit him harder than anything else, because when he spoke again, his voice was hoarse. “Are you serious?”
You didn’t answer. You weren’t sure you could.
“Of course I fucking miss you,” he snapped. “Every damn day. But I can’t just—” He cut himself off, cursing under his breath. “I don’t know what you want me to do, Y/N. I can’t fix the distance. I can’t fix my schedule. I can’t—”
“I don’t want you to fix it,” you admitted, voice cracking. “I just want to matter enough for you to try.”
The silence came back, heavier than before.
You closed your eyes. “I can’t do this right now.”
“Wait—”
“I need space, Luke.” Your throat tightened. “Just… goodnight.”
Then, before he could say anything else, you hung up.
You threw your phone onto the nightstand and curled up into yourself, letting the weight of it all crash down.
Outside, the city lights flickered through your window, but they didn’t feel warm. Not tonight.
Not when you weren’t sure if this was just another fight—
Or the beginning of the end.
———
You didn’t sleep.
Not really, anyway. You drifted in and out, your mind replaying every second of last night’s fight, twisting his words in a way that left a hollow ache in your chest.
By the time morning rolled around, your phone was still dark. No texts. No missed calls.
Luke had listened when you said you needed space.
You weren’t sure if that made you feel better or worse.
With a deep sigh, you pushed the blankets off and sat up, rubbing your hands over your face. The apartment was quiet, save for the occasional hum of traffic outside. It felt unnatural, like the silence had taken up permanent residence in your head, stretching far beyond last night.
You hated how much you missed him.
Even now, your body was wired to check your phone first thing in the morning, waiting for one of his lazy, half-awake messages. Morning, pretty girl. Wish you were here. Call me when you wake up.
But today, there was nothing.
It shouldn’t have surprised you. You were the one who ended the call. You were the one who asked for space.
So why did it feel like he was the one pulling away?
With a groan, you flopped back onto the pillows and stared at the ceiling, replaying the fight in your head. Maybe you’d overreacted. Maybe you should’ve let him explain instead of throwing accusations like knives. You knew his schedule was hell. You knew long distance wasn’t easy.
But at the same time… when was the last time he really made you feel like a priority?
Before you could spiral any further, your phone buzzed.
Your heart jumped.
But when you grabbed it, the screen didn’t show Luke’s name.
It was your best friend, Riley.
RILEY: u up? brunch. now. no excuses.
You hesitated. Normally, you’d decline, opting to stay curled up in your thoughts. But today, with the weight of last night still pressing on your chest, you needed the distraction.
YOU: be there in 20.
—
The café was small and familiar, the kind of place you and Riley had claimed as your own years ago. The smell of coffee and syrup hung thick in the air, and the morning crowd buzzed around you.
Riley spotted you before you even reached the table. “Oh, yeah. You look rough.”
You rolled your eyes as you dropped into the seat across from her. “Thanks.”
She pushed a mimosa toward you. “Drink. Then talk.”
You didn’t argue. One sip turned into two, and before you knew it, you were spilling everything—how Luke had called, how you fought, how you hung up first. How he hadn’t texted since.
Riley frowned. “So you told him you needed space, and now you’re mad that he’s giving it to you?”
You groaned, slumping in your seat. “Not when you say it like that.”
“Well, how else am I supposed to say it?” She arched a brow. “Did you expect him to blow up your phone? Show up at your door?”
You hated that you didn’t have a good answer.
Riley sighed, softer this time. “I get it, babe. I do. Long distance sucks. And I know you’re tired of feeling like you’re the only one putting in the effort. But you guys love each other, right?”
Your stomach twisted. Love.
Neither of you had said it yet.
Riley noticed your silence and leaned forward. “Wait. Have you guys even talked about—?”
“No,” you cut in quickly, suddenly regretting this conversation. “It’s not like that.”
She gave you a knowing look but didn’t push. “Okay. So what is it like?”
You exhaled, running a hand through your hair. “It’s…” You struggled for the right words. “It’s messy. It’s intense. It’s too much but never enough at the same time.”
Riley nodded like she understood, even though you weren’t sure you did.
For a second, neither of you spoke. Then, she reached for her phone.
“What are you doing?”
She didn’t answer right away. Then, with a pointed look, she turned the screen toward you.
Luke’s latest Instagram post stared back at you.
Your chest tightened.
It was a photo of him at practice, mid-laugh, sweaty and effortless in a way that made your heart ache. The caption was simple. Back at it.
Nothing dramatic. Nothing emotional.
But all the comments blurred together in your head. Can’t wait to watch you this season! Missed you on the ice! Looking good, Hughesy!
It was a reminder that, while you were sitting here overthinking everything, Luke was out there living.
Like last night never happened.
Like you didn’t happen.
You swallowed hard. “So what? He’s just… moving on?”
Riley gave you a sympathetic look. “Or maybe he’s just waiting. For you to reach out first.”
You stared at the screen, your stomach twisting into knots.
Maybe she was right. Maybe you should text him.
Or maybe the cracks were already too deep to fix.
———
It had been three days.
Three days since the fight. Three days since you hung up on Luke. Three days of absolute silence.
You told yourself you wouldn’t be the one to break first. If he cared, he’d reach out. If he wanted this to work, he’d try.
But every hour that passed without his name lighting up your phone chipped away at your resolve.
You were starting to wonder if maybe this was how it ended—not with a dramatic goodbye, but with a slow, suffocating silence that swallowed you whole.
And yet, even with the weight of it pressing down on your chest, you still couldn’t bring yourself to text him first.
Instead, you did the worst possible thing.
You checked social media.
Luke wasn’t the type to post often, but his teammates were. And there he was—in a video on Jack’s story, laughing in the background, surrounded by friends, a drink in hand like the last three days hadn’t meant anything to him.
You stared at the screen, your grip tightening on your phone.
Maybe this was stupid. Maybe you were reading too much into it.
But the longer you watched, the worse it got.
Because then she appeared.
A girl you didn’t recognise—blonde, wearing a Devils jersey far too oversized to be her own—sidling up next to Luke, whispering something in his ear. He didn’t move away. Didn’t look uncomfortable. Just smirked, shaking his head at whatever she said before taking another sip of his drink.
Your stomach twisted.
The worst part wasn’t the fact that she was there. It wasn’t even the fact that Luke didn’t seem to mind.
It was the fact that, for the first time since you met him, you had no idea where you stood.
You weren’t his girlfriend, not officially.
Not really.
Because when the summer ended, neither of you had wanted to put a label on it. You told yourselves it was easier that way—no pressure, no expectations, just whatever this was.
But now, as you watched him on that screen, looking so effortlessly unbothered, it hit you like a fucking freight train.
Maybe you’d been wrong.
Maybe you weren’t something worth holding on to.
The buzzing in your head was so loud that you almost didn’t hear Riley calling your name.
You blinked, barely processing that she was standing in the doorway of your apartment. “Are you even listening?”
You swallowed hard, locking your phone before she could see the screen. “What?”
She sighed, stepping inside and dropping onto your couch. “I said we’re going out tonight. You need a distraction.”
“I don’t need a distraction,” you muttered, even as you stared blankly at the wall.
Riley rolled her eyes. “Okay, so what? You’re just gonna sit here all night, refreshing Instagram like a psycho?”
Your silence must have been answer enough.
She groaned. “Y/N. Come on. I love you, but this? This isn’t healthy. You don’t even know what’s going on.”
You clenched your jaw. “I know enough.”
She gave you a long look, then sighed. “Fine. If you’re not gonna let it go, then at least don’t let him be the only one having fun tonight.”
You hesitated.
Riley saw the crack in your resolve and jumped on it. “Just a couple drinks. That’s all I’m asking.”
You weren’t sure why you agreed. Maybe it was the fact that you’d barely left your apartment in days. Maybe it was the need to feel something—anything—other than this ache in your chest.
Or maybe, deep down, it was the smallest, most pathetic part of you that wanted Luke to see you moving on, too.
———
The bar was packed. Music pulsed through the speakers, and the air was thick with the smell of alcohol and too many bodies crammed into one space.
It should’ve felt suffocating.
But instead, with a drink in your hand and Riley’s laughter ringing in your ears, you almost managed to forget.
Almost.
At least, until your phone buzzed in your pocket.
You knew who it was before you even checked.
LUKE: are you out?
Your heart nearly stopped. After three days of nothing, this was how he chose to reach out? Not an apology. Not an explanation. Just that.
You swallowed the lump in your throat and typed back before you could think better of it.
YOU: why do you care?
His response was instant.
LUKE: where are you?
You stared at the message, pulse pounding in your ears.
He had no right to be asking that. Not after ignoring you. Not after letting you sit with the weight of this fight while he went out, acting like he didn’t care.
So instead of answering, you did the stupidest thing possible.
You let some guy buy you another drink.
You didn’t know his name. Didn’t care. He was tall, attractive, and most importantly—he wasn’t Luke.
And if you felt the burn of guilt in your chest when he leaned in closer, when his fingers brushed against yours. You shouldn’t even feel guilty, right? Luke’s been doing the same thing.
At least, that’s what you told yourself.
Until your phone buzzed again.
LUKE: Y/N.
One words. Your name. That’s all it took to make your breath hitch.
Because suddenly, it wasn’t just a fight. It wasn’t just a rough patch.
This was a game.
———
The tension had been simmering all night.
It started with Luke’s text. One simple word that crawled under your skin, wrapping around your ribs like a vice. But what pissed you off the most wasn’t the message itself.
It was the fact that he suddenly cared.
After three days of silence. After her in his Instagram story. After making you feel like you were the only one suffering through this distance.
And now, here he was, acting like he had a say in what you did.
So you ignored the text.
And maybe you let that guy keep flirting with you a little longer than you should have. Maybe you let his hand linger at the small of your back when he leaned in to talk. Maybe you even laughed a little louder, tilted your chin just enough that if Luke somehow saw—if he was watching—he’d know exactly what you were doing.
It was petty. It was reckless.
But so was loving someone who could make you feel this small.
The tension cracked the second you stepped outside the bar.
Luke was waiting.
You nearly tripped when you saw him, heart slamming against your ribs. He was standing near the curb, hands shoved into his hoodie pockets, jaw clenched so tightly it looked like he was trying to grind his teeth into dust.
Your stomach flipped. He was here. He actually came.
But you weren’t sure if that made things better or worse.
His eyes locked onto you immediately, flickering down to the guy who had followed you out. And in that moment, the simmering tension didn’t just build. It exploded.
“The fuck is this?” Luke’s voice was low, controlled—but you knew him well enough to hear the storm brewing beneath it.
You blinked, still caught off guard by the fact that he was here. “What?”
Luke’s jaw tightened. “Who the hell is he?”
The guy next to you—God, you didn’t even remember his name—shifted awkwardly. “Uh—”
“Not your business, Hughes,” you cut in before he could finish.
Luke’s eyes snapped back to you. “Not my business?”
“You heard me.” Your pulse was pounding, but you forced yourself to hold your ground. “You don’t get to disappear for three days and then show up acting like you have any right to be pissed.”
Luke let out a sharp, bitter laugh. “That’s funny, because I could say the same thing. You tell me you need space, ignore me for days, and then I see you all over some guy?”
“I ignored you?” You scoffed, anger bubbling to the surface. “That’s rich, Luke. Where the hell were you? Oh, right—too busy playing NHL golden boy, letting some random girl hang off you—”
“What girl?”
The fact that he had the audacity to act confused made your blood boil. “Don’t play dumb.” You crossed your arms, nails digging into your skin. “The blonde. The one in your jersey.”
Luke stared at you for a moment, then let out another disbelieving laugh. “Are you fucking serious?”
“Dead serious.”
“She’s Jack’s friend. She was at the game. I barely talked to her.” He shook his head, eyes dark with frustration. “Jesus, Y/N. You saw a story and what—just assumed the worst?”
You hated the way your stomach twisted at that.
Because maybe—just maybe—he was right. Maybe you had let jealousy cloud your judgment. Maybe you had let the silence between you turn into something uglier than it was ever meant to be.
But that didn’t change the fact that this wasn’t just about her.
It was about everything.
The late-night calls that were always cut short. The weeks without seeing each other. The way it felt like you were constantly reaching for him while he was always a step too far away.
“You let me assume the worst,” you muttered, voice shaking despite yourself. “Because you never do anything to prove me wrong.”
Luke’s expression flickered—just for a second. And in that second, you saw it. The guilt.
But then, just as quickly, it was gone.
“What do you want me to say, Y/N?” His voice was quieter now, raw around the edges. “That I wish I could be around more? That I fucking hate the distance just as much as you do?” He exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. “You act like this is easy for me. Like I don’t miss you every goddamn day.”
Your throat tightened. “Then why don’t you act like it?”
He stared at you, breathing hard, like he was trying to find the right words—but they never came.
And that was the problem, wasn’t it?
There was always so much left unsaid.
Neither of you spoke. The tension that had been simmering all night was now crackling in the air between you, but this time, there was nowhere left for it to go.
The guy you had walked out with cleared his throat. “Uh—”
Luke’s head snapped toward him. “Leave.”
“Luke—”
“No, it’s fine.” The guy held up his hands, clearly deciding that whatever this was, it wasn’t worth the drama. “I’ll see you around, Y/N.”
You didn’t watch him leave. You didn’t even care.
Because all of your attention was on Luke.
On the way his shoulders were tense, his fists clenched at his sides, his eyes locked onto yours like this was some kind of battle neither of you knew how to win.
Finally, after what felt like forever, you exhaled. “So what now?”
Luke hesitated.
And that hesitation—that tiny moment of uncertainty—made something inside you crack.
Because if he didn’t know, then maybe you already did.
Maybe you’d known for a while.
Maybe you just hadn’t wanted to say it out loud.
You swallowed hard. “I can’t keep doing this, Luke.”
His face fell.
You regretted the words the second they left your mouth.
I can’t keep doing this, Luke.
Because now they were out there, hanging heavy in the space between you, and you couldn’t take them back.
Luke’s face twisted, like the weight of them had hit him straight in the chest. He shifted slightly, like he wanted to move closer but didn’t know if he was still allowed to. “You don’t mean that.”
Your throat tightened. Didn’t you?
“I don’t know,” you whispered, voice barely audible over the hum of the city around you. “I don’t know what I mean anymore.”
That seemed to snap something in him. His jaw clenched, frustration bleeding into his voice. “So what? You just want to walk away?”
Your stomach twisted. That wasn’t what you wanted—not really. But maybe it would be easier. Maybe it would hurt less than this constant, suffocating ache in your chest.
“I don’t want to,” you admitted, voice cracking. “But, Luke… I don’t know how to keep this from falling apart.”
He exhaled sharply, raking a hand through his hair. “Then we figure it out.”
You let out a hollow laugh. “And how do we do that? Because I’m fucking exhausted. I’m tired of feeling like I’m the only one fighting for this.”
That made something flicker in his expression—something wounded. “That’s not fair.”
You scoffed. “Isn’t it?”
His eyes darkened. “You think I don’t fight for this? You think I don’t want to be with you?”
“I think you want me when it’s convenient.” The words came out sharper than you intended, but you didn’t take them back. “When you have time. When it doesn’t get in the way of your schedule.”
Luke took a step closer, shaking his head. “That’s bullshit.”
“Is it?” You could feel your control slipping, the frustration bubbling over. “Because I spend every day waiting for you to call, waiting for you to show up—and half the time, I’m left wondering if you even remember I exist.”
Luke’s brows furrowed, his expression torn between anger and something softer, something that looked like guilt.
“You don’t get it,” he muttered, voice tight. “You have no fucking clue how hard this is for me too.”
“Then tell me.” Your voice cracked, raw and desperate. “Because all I know is that I feel like I’m constantly reaching for you, and you’re never there.”
Luke let out a frustrated breath, his hands flexing like he didn’t know what to do with them. “I don’t know how to do this, okay? I don’t know how to give you everything you deserve while I’m a thousand miles away.”
Your chest ached at the confession, at the vulnerability underneath the frustration. But it didn’t change anything.
“I’m not asking for everything, Luke.” Your voice softened just slightly. “I’m just asking for something.”
Luke shook his head, exhaling sharply. “I—fuck.” He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, like he was trying to pull himself together. “I don’t know how to fix this, but I can’t lose you.”
Your heart clenched.
Because that was the problem, wasn’t it?
Neither of you knew how to fix it. But neither of you could bear the thought of letting go.
Luke’s gaze searched yours, desperate and pleading. “Tell me what to do.”
Your throat felt tight. “I don’t have the answer.”
For a second, neither of you spoke. The tension was suffocating, your emotions teetering on a knife’s edge.
Then, suddenly, Luke moved.
He reached for you like it was instinct, his hands cupping your face, his forehead pressing against yours. His breath was shaky, his grip almost too tight—like he was afraid you’d slip right through his fingers.
“I love you.” The words were barely above a whisper, but they hit you like a punch to the chest.
Your breath hitched.
Because he’d never said it before. Neither of you had.
You felt your resolve cracking, splintering under the weight of those three words.
But love wasn’t always enough.
And as much as you wanted to believe this was the turning point—the moment everything changed—you weren’t sure if this was a beginning or just the messiest part of the end.
Because Luke had never said those words before.
And you’d spent so long wondering if he ever would—if he ever could.
Now, here they were, hanging in the air between you like a lifeline you weren’t sure you could reach for.
I love you.
You squeezed your eyes shut, feeling the way his hands trembled against your skin. He was holding you so tightly, like he thought you might slip through his fingers if he let go.
And maybe he was right.
Because as much as you wanted to say it back—as much as you felt it—you weren’t sure love was enough to fix this.
Your throat felt tight. “Luke…”
He shook his head quickly, like he already knew what you were going to say. “Don’t. Just—don’t say it if you don’t mean it.”
Your heart twisted. “I do mean it.”
Luke’s breath hitched, but before he could say anything, you continued.
“I love you, Luke.” The words tasted like the truth, and you hated how much it hurt to say them. “But I don’t know if that changes anything.”
Luke exhaled sharply, pulling back just enough to look at you. His eyes were desperate, searching. “Of course it changes things.”
You swallowed hard. “Does it?”
He blinked, like he hadn’t expected you to ask that. “It has to.”
Your chest ached. Because you wanted to believe that. You wanted to believe that loving each other was enough to make the distance bearable, to make the jealousy fade, to make the ache in your chest disappear every time he left.
But love wasn’t a bandage. It didn’t erase the late nights spent staring at your phone, wondering if he’d call. It didn’t undo the fights, the silences, the way you felt like you were constantly fighting a battle you didn’t know how to win.
Luke must have seen the hesitation on your face because his grip tightened. “Y/N, I need you to tell me what to do here.” His voice was quiet, but it was raw, edged with frustration and fear. “Because I don’t want to lose you, but I don’t know how to make this work.”
You let out a shaky breath. “I don’t know either.”
And that was the problem, wasn’t it?
Neither of you had the answers.
You loved him, and he loved you. But love alone wasn’t fixing anything.
Luke clenched his jaw. “So what? We just give up?”
You inhaled sharply. “I don’t want to.”
“Then don’t,” he pleaded. “Stay.”
Your heart cracked straight down the middle.
Because God, you wanted to stay. You wanted to hold onto him and pretend like love was enough. You wanted to ignore the distance, the fights, the uncertainty.
But how much longer could you keep pretending that love was enough to stop this from falling apart?
Tears burned at the back of your eyes. “Luke, I don’t know how to keep doing this.”
His expression twisted, something breaking in his gaze.
Neither of you spoke for a long moment.
The silence felt heavier than ever before. Stretching between you, thick and suffocating.
Luke’s hands were still on you, but his grip had loosened—like he knew, deep down, that he couldn’t hold on forever.
But neither of you were ready to say it out loud.
Not yet.
“I can do better,” he said suddenly, voice hoarse. “I’ll—fuck, I’ll make more time. I’ll fly out every chance I get. I’ll call more. Whatever you need.”
Your chest ached at the desperation in his voice.
Because he meant it. You knew he did.
But the problem was never him meaning it.
The problem was reality—the way life always seemed to get in the way, no matter how much either of you wanted to pretend otherwise.
You swallowed hard. “Luke…”
“Just give me a chance,” he pleaded. “One more chance to make this work.”
You hated how badly you wanted to say yes.
Because you did. You wanted to believe him. You wanted to believe that one more try would be enough. That if you just held on a little longer, fought a little harder, things would get easier.
But history had already proven otherwise.
Still, when you looked at him—at the raw emotion in his eyes, the way he looked at you like you were slipping through his fingers—you couldn’t bring yourself to say no.
Not yet.
You exhaled shakily. “Okay.”
Luke’s shoulders sagged with relief, and before you could second-guess it, he was pulling you against him. His arms wrapped around you tightly, his face buried in your hair, like he was trying to memorise the feel of you against him.
“I love you,” he murmured again, like saying it enough times would make everything okay.
You squeezed your eyes shut, gripping the back of his hoodie like it was the only thing keeping you upright.
“I love you too,” you whispered.
And you did.
But deep down, you had a sinking feeling that love wouldn’t be enough to save you.
Not this time.
———
You should’ve known it wouldn’t last.
For a little while, it almost felt like things were okay. Luke called more, sent you stupid texts throughout the day, made an effort to remind you that he wanted this, that he wanted you.
And maybe that should’ve been enough.
But it wasn’t.
Because even when he was trying—when he was doing everything he promised he would—the ache in your chest never really went away.
It wasn’t just the distance. It was the exhaustion. The weight of trying so hard, only to feel like you were running in circles.
Like you were holding onto something that was already slipping through the cracks.
And now, standing in his apartment, you felt the final thread start to snap.
Luke was frustrated. You could see it in the way he raked a hand through his hair, in the way his jaw kept clenching like he was trying to hold something back.
“Jesus, Y/N, what else do you want me to do?” His voice wasn’t raised, but it was edged with something sharp, something tired. “I’m trying. I’m here. What more do you want?”
You exhaled shakily, heart pounding against your ribs. “I don’t know.”
Luke let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head. “You have to know. Because I can’t keep guessing what’s going to make you happy.”
Your stomach twisted. “This isn’t just about me.”
“No? Because it sure as hell feels like I’m the only one bending over backward to make this work.”
That stung.
Because you had been trying. You had been fighting for this.
But maybe that was the difference.
Luke thought fixing this was about doing things—calling more, texting more, showing up when he could. And sure, those things mattered. But that wasn’t what was breaking you.
It was everything in between.
The distance that couldn’t be closed by a few extra phone calls. The silence that still felt heavy, even when you were together. The way you still felt alone, even in the moments he was right in front of you.
It wasn’t about effort anymore. It was about the fact that maybe—just maybe—you weren’t supposed to keep fighting for something that hurt this much.
Your throat felt tight. “I don’t think we can fix this.”
Luke froze.
For a second, neither of you spoke.
Then, his expression hardened. “So that’s it?”
Your chest ached. “Luke—”
“No, seriously. That’s it?” He let out a sharp breath, stepping back like he couldn’t stand being this close to you anymore. “We hit a rough patch, and you just decide it’s not worth it?”
Tears burned at the back of your eyes, but you refused to let them fall. “This isn’t just a rough patch.” Your voice wavered. “We’ve been fighting for months. We keep trying, and it’s not working.”
Luke shook his head, eyes dark with frustration. “No. You keep doubting us. You keep looking for an excuse to leave.”
That felt like a slap.
“Do you think this is easy for me?” Your voice cracked. “Do you think I want to feel like this? To feel like I’m constantly begging for something that’s never enough?”
Luke’s expression flickered—like maybe, just maybe, he finally saw how much this had been hurting you.
But the worst part?
You knew it was hurting him too.
That was what made this so fucking unbearable.
Because this wasn’t about not loving each other.
It was about the fact that love had stopped being enough.
Luke’s hands flexed at his sides, like he wanted to reach for you but didn’t know if he should. His voice was quieter when he spoke again, but it still felt like a punch to the gut.
“You really want to do this?”
No.
God, no.
But what choice did you have?
Your chest felt like it was caving in, but you forced yourself to nod. “Yeah.”
Luke inhaled sharply, like he’d been punched.
And just like that, it was over.
The fight drained out of him all at once. His shoulders slumped, his eyes flickering toward the floor. “Okay.”
You weren’t sure which hurt more—the frustration, the fighting, or this.
The emptiness.
The realisation that there was nothing left to say.
You swallowed past the lump in your throat. “I should go.”
Luke didn’t stop you.
And somehow, that was the worst part of all.
———
The apartment felt too quiet.
Your suitcase sat half-open by the door, clothes spilling out of it. You hadn’t unpacked since you got back a week ago, pathetically trying to cling onto something you weren’t ready to let go of.
But what was left to stay for?
Your hands shook as you opened it further, starting to finally unpack. Your chest felt hollow, like the fight had carved out a part of you that you weren’t sure would ever feel whole again.
You had been the one to walk away.
So why did it feel like you had just lost everything?
You had told yourself that this was the right decision. That love—no matter how deep, no matter how real—wasn’t always enough. That some things just didn’t work, no matter how badly you wanted them to.
But God, it hurt.
Your phone sat on the bedside table, untouched since you got back to your apartment.
Luke hadn’t called.
And you weren’t sure what hurt more—the idea that he was too angry to reach out, or the possibility that maybe, just maybe, he had already accepted this.
That he was ready to let you go.
You weren’t sure you were ready to let go of him.
But you had already done the hardest part. You had walked out of his apartment, out of his life.
Now, you just had to figure out how to live with it.
———
The silence in the apartment was unbearable.
Luke had never noticed how loud it was when you were here—the hum of your voice on the phone, the sound of your laugh echoing from the other room, the way you always seemed to fill the space in a way he never had.
Now, it was just quiet.
And he fucking hated it.
His hands flexed at his sides as he paced the living room, jaw clenched so tightly it hurt.
You were gone.
And it wasn’t a stupid fight. It wasn’t a rough patch.
This time, you weren’t coming back.
Luke had thought about calling you. Had stared at his phone for so long that his vision blurred, the screen taunting him with your name.
But what would he even say?
That he was sorry? That he still loved you? That he wanted to take it all back, but he knew deep down that nothing had changed?
That no matter how much he wanted to fix this, some things just weren’t meant to be fixed?
Luke sat down heavily on the couch, staring at the door like he half expected you to walk back in.
But you wouldn’t.
And he wasn’t sure how to live with that.
———
Time was supposed to make this easier.
That’s what everyone told you. That eventually, the ache in your chest would dull, and one day you’d wake up without the weight of him pressing against your ribs.
But weeks had passed. Then months.
And Luke still felt like a ghost in your life.
He was everywhere and nowhere all at once. In the song that played in the coffee shop, in the hoodie still shoved in the back of your closet because you couldn’t bring yourself to throw it away. In the fleeting moments when you reached for your phone before remembering that he wasn’t yours to call anymore.
You had moved on, technically. You did all the things you were supposed to do—went out with friends, filled your days with distractions, pretended like the hole in your chest wasn’t still there.
But every time you saw his name in a headline, every time you heard his voice in an interview, it hit you like a punch to the gut.
Because you still missed him.
And no matter how much time passed, you weren’t sure you’d ever stop.
———
He didn’t talk about you.
Not to his teammates, not to his family, not even when Jack asked in that quiet, careful way that made Luke’s jaw tighten.
Because if he didn’t talk about you, maybe he could pretend like he wasn’t still thinking about you.
Like he didn’t check his phone some nights, scrolling mindlessly, hoping to see your name somewhere even though he knew he wouldn’t.
Like he didn’t still hear your voice in the back of his head sometimes, teasing him, laughing, telling him you loved him.
It was pathetic, probably. Holding onto something that was already gone.
But Luke had never been good at letting go.
He threw himself into hockey. Into practices, games, anything that kept him too exhausted to think about the way his apartment still felt empty without you.
But some nights, when the adrenaline faded and the silence crept in, he wondered.
If you still thought about him. If you still missed him the way he missed you.
If this was really over.
Or if maybe, just maybe, it never really would be.
#luke hughes angst#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes fic#luke hughes fanfic#luke hughes#lhughes#lh43#new jersey devils#nj devils#devils hockey#hockeyluvrr
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A uni professor once took the time in a lesson regarding social language to explain what most of these actually mean and why they're used, so I'll try to help clarify the ones that are most confusing in your response, if that's okay? Most of the ones I clarified apply primarily to the work environment (especially as a worker, not a boss or higher-up), however they can be extrapolated to social situations too. They're also mostly regarding one's own sense of importance (either conscious or apparent), which allistics don't take very kind to, especially when there's an established hierarchy and you're "below" them.
Note: in these I use "you" in a general sense, not directly at the person who added the commentary.
Note: if I didn't clarify one, I either agree fully that it's easy-to-spot bullshit, it's been explained by prev already, or it's too self-explanatory and does not require further comment.
Note: I am autistic and have experienced the weirdness of these "rules" myself, so my professor (also autistic) did me a big one for that class.
1. To allistics this makes them think that the person sitting is being disrespectful by "feeling too important to make the effort to stand up as well and see eye to eye". It's kind of like a king on a throne won't stand for a peasant. I think it's utter bullshit tbh, especially for those that may not be able to stand or stand easily.
2. One thing is to have food issues and another thing is to insult the person who made the food. This is about the second option. It's under the premise that a person put effort in making the food/spent money buying it, and you're telling them "this is gross and you're stupid/bad for making/buying it". If the problem is a food issue (such as sensory issues, allergies, etc, or even that you just don't like eating this dish in particular), you can indeed say that you don't like it or won't eat it in a polite way, without making the other person's effort seem stupid. Again, this "rule" is about outright insulting the food a person made, or the person who made the food. If you (general you) feel entitled to make someone else feel bad for making food for you and inviting you to have it in their own home, you can go get your own food at your own place and avoid all the hassle.
4. The first part means to "protect" those less experienced than you, such as children or new people at work, as you know more and are likely to have more skills in the specific environment than them (such as a new person at a job may have a hard time working the register and it's nice to help them figure it out instead of letting them take a reprimand. Obviously, this would vary in hierarchy and time accessibility you have. Generally a boss/manager should be in charge of this in work settings not make it the obligation of a same-position coworker, tho I'm sure some of them won't mind helping, and for kids, they're obviously more at risk than adults in many things so adults should try to watch out for them if they see a lone kid, however it shouldn't be the job of a 10 y/o or even a 15 y/o to raise a 5 y/o, even though it happens). The second part means to not devalue those who are in your same position/age/level but rather to have mutual respect. They're supposed to be your equal and you are theirs, and you, nor they should not act like one is superior to the other when you are both in the exact same playing field or level. In a simplified example: you should not claim you're superior to your twin in looks and features, you're literally twins, you should have mutual respect for each other.
5. No typo. "You should never make the first offer in negotiation because the other person will try to take advantage of this to fuck you over or reject your offer. Especially if you're, say, looking for a job, if it's your first time in such a job and you don't know the salaries in this position, making the first offer may mean you're either way underestimating what you should earn (and they'll obviously take advantage of this and make you work for far less than you deserve), or they'll see you as "feeling superior" because you're asking too much and decide you're not worth the effort because they're either wanting to cut corners or don't trust you're worth that much. For example: average rates for X job are $5.00/hour. They ask for what you think your salary should be. You (inexperienced in the job market) say $1.00/hour, or worse, $5.00/day. Boss says "okay, that's great, you're hired" and they keep the other $4.00 an hour for themselves without ever telling you. If you say, however, that you want $20.00/hour, they'll mentally sneer at you lile "who does this bitch thing they are? The goddamn Michelangelo of this gig??? You can't earn more than me" And reject you, even if you have incredible certifications and recommendations.
7. Is entirely judgemental and classist. At the very core it means "don't dress with dirty/broken/offensive clothes", as in, if you have ripped and stained pants, your shoes have an unglued sole, or you wear a jacket with "cumslut" embroidered in the back, while at a job interview or visiting an elderly home, it either gives (them) the impression that you don't care about things, are unhygienic/unkempt, will be rude to people, or will overall present a bad image when presented to new people. Of course, however, people have taken this to outrageous heights where they think you should dress in high fashion or brand clothes and look expensive to be considered "good" nowadays, even if you can't afford it/don't feel comfortable like that/have a defined personal style. And while they cannot force you to do this, it's socially accepted for them to turn you away.
8. First half "say what you mean": allistic people will take only the truth that either benefits them or makes them feel flattered, if you talk honestly but cushion it or phrase it in a way they like hearing, they'll be okay with it. It's bullshit because if you mean to be rude and say something rude, it's looked down on but if you mean something rude but say it "nicely" they won't mind that much. Second half "mean what you say": basically "don't lie". If you say you can carry 50 bottles of water in one go, then you better mean it because they'll take it and expect you to deliver by carrying the 50 water bottles in one single trip. If you say you have a good grasp on guitar playing, you better play more than decently rather than barely knowing how to play isolated chords. If you say you have the skill to animate a short film on Blender, you better have Blender and know how to use it to animate.
9. This one is double: a) if you ask more than you answer, you show initiative and interest in what's happening, most people see this as a positive thing and are more likely to hire you/include you in stuff, it also makes you seem not self-centered in situations where you need to gain favour from higher ups. Once again, people in higher positions like bosses don't like their workers or even potential workers' sense of self-importance because it disrupts hierarchy. They're the boss, not you. And even if you know better, they're the boss, not you. (Bullshit, I know) And b) it's useful to get as much info as you can from stuff like a job interview, while not giving them literally all your information in exchange of nothing (because they may not even hire you yet they'll have all your info and you'll have nothing), however, if you ask a lot, you'll also have more referents for future endeavours of similar nature (like rates! If you learn in interview A and B that rates go between $4.20/hour to $6.00/hour, you'll be able to negotiate reasonably within that range in interview C!)
11. 12. and 13. Are all three regarding self-importance (again...)
11. Having your phone on the table makes it seem like you care less about the people you're sharing with during the meal than whatever is on your phone, and therefore your phone deserves "presence" despite being an object.
12. Allistic people (especially authorities) like feeling like the center of attention when they're speaking. They're very visual when it comes to their reassurances, so having eyes on them and being smiled at makes them feel like they're being given the importance they deserve because "wow, attention! And smiles are positives that imply this person agrees with me! Good". If you don't look at them (in the eye, especially) or don't show being "agreeable" by smiling, they interpret that as "this person feels superior to me (bad thing!) and feels that I'm not worth their unadulterated attention even though I'm their higher-up, so they think they're better than me and don't respect me".
13. If you ask to go to a party some coworkers from a different branch are organising, you seem like relatively exclusive events should make an exception for you specifically, and this is considered rude because "why should we invite you? You're not the target demographic yet you're pushing the door open to come in". A couple is going on a romantic date and you ask to go, it'll be intrusive to them since this was a date for them as a couple, you'd be third-wheeling. If your friend gets tickets for themself and their sibling for their birthday to see their favourite artist, and you ask to go as well, you're changing their whole plan because even if you pay for your part of everything, they'll now have to account for a bigger hotel room, maybe a different seating area at the concert because there weren't 3 consecutive seats where they initially placed themselves and it'd be rude to leave you on the other end of the stadium if you're going together, different meal plans, more luggage to take care of, etc. If someone's having a friend over because they got kicked out, and you ask to go as well like it's a sleepover, you're seen as not considering the painful, or even dangerous situation in which the person who got kicked out is (and why their friend is offering their place), and you're somewhat making light of it instead. Now, obviously, there's exceptions and when you start listing events to which you could invite yourself to, they can seem obvious, but generally if there's a plan that doesn't include you, to allistics (and some others) you'll be seen as if you should be given some priority over others if you ask to go with.
15. This is basically "no means no" but with the added bonus of "if you're begging on your knees for weeks after being told 'no' right to your face, you'll look desperate, pathetic or like you're harassing them, or all three". If a relationship is not meant to be because one side has made it clear they don't want it, the side that continues to beg looks bad.
1. Never shake hand while sitting. 2. Never talk bad about the food when you are the guest. 3. Don't eat the last piece of something you didn't buy. 4. Protect who is behind you and respect who is beside you. 5. Never make the first offer in a negotiation. 6. Don't take credit for the work you didn't do. 7. Dress well, no matter what the occasion. 8. Speak honestly: say what you think and mean what you say. 9. Ask more than you answer. 10. Leave the profane language for the less educated. 11. Avoid placing your phone on the table when eating with someone. 12. Listen, smile and most of all make eye contact. 13. If you're not invited, don't ask to go. 14. Never be ashamed of where you come from. 15. Don't beg for a relationship.
This is why it's so hard to be autistic.
Some of these are critical advice. Some of these are utter bullshit. But they're all on the same list and people regularly share lists like these as if they're gospel.
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The Warmth of You- Danny Ramirez
Description: (Y/N) is overwhelmed, caught between exhaustion and self-doubt, but Danny reminds her that she doesn’t have to carry it all alone in a quiet night filled with warmth, music, and understanding.
Warnings: RPF, Fluff.
GIF Credit: @lesbiradshaw
The house felt unusually quiet on that Friday afternoon, the kind of stillness that seemed out of place when both Danny and (Y/N) were home. She had been going through a tough time lately, and her usual cheerful self seemed to be fading. Danny knew she needed space, and he was more than willing to respect that. But, deep down, he couldn’t just stand by and let her face it by herself.
The sun was already setting when she finally stepped out of their room, Danny calling for her a second time. She followed the sound of his voice, instinctively heading toward the kitchen as the smell of food floated toward her. As she rounded the corner, Danny turned his head from the stove, just as he finished the pasta. He turned the music down a notch to be able to talk to her.
"I'm almost done here. How’s it look?" he asked, a small grin tugging at his lips.
(Y/N) took a step closer, her eyes scanning the dish as he plated the second one.
"Look at you," She offered him a half-smile, "You decided to step it up this time. Looks great."
Danny flashed a smug smile in return, happy to see her smile, even if it was just a little. He handed her the plate, his voice playful. "Don't sleep on me, baby. What you learn right, you never forget." He tossed the towel over his shoulder, then grabbed his plate with one hand and a couple of drinks with the other.
"Come on," he said, nudging her toward the balcony.
(Y/N) followed him, a little confused as to why he was leading her outside instead of to their usual dining area. But as they reached the balcony, her confusion faded into surprise. He had transformed the space into a cozy little setup — a coffee table, the small sofa, and a couple of blankets arranged perfectly, creating a warm, intimate corner.
"Wow," she spoke softly, stopping for a moment to take in the scene. The last light of the setting sun bathed the space in a soft orange glow, casting gentle shadows over everything. It was quiet and peaceful.
Danny smiled, placing her plate down on the table and taking a seat on the couch. "I figured we could hang out here. It’s been a while since we did something like this."
He knew how much she loved watching the sunsets, and while they didn’t always have the luxury of enjoying them at the beach, they had found a place where they could at least catch that golden hour every now and then.
(Y/N) smiled, truly touched by the effort he’d put into making this moment feel special.
"This is really nice... Thank you," She settled beside him and crossed her legs while he handed her the food.
As they both settled into the cozy setup, the faint hum of the city below them was the only sound besides the occasional clink of their plates. Slowly, the golden light faded as the sky darkened, being replaced by the twinkling city lights. The soft sound of music played in the background, creating a comforting rhythm as they ate, the melody weaving its way through the air, adding a layer of calm to the moment.
Danny occasionally cracked a joke about how the whole dinner thing was turning out better than he expected, and (Y/N) playfully rolled her eyes, but the faintest smile tugged at her lips. It was nice to have moments like this, the simple act of sharing a meal providing a sense of normalcy.
When they finished, he took their empty plates and set them aside, still humming to the music as he moved around the kitchen. (Y/N) didn’t say much, content to sit for a moment and let the evening sink in before Danny returned to her side and sat back down next to her.
The girl kept her eyes trained on the view, her thoughts drifting to places she hadn’t visited in a while. She felt the weight of everything she had been holding onto — the stress, the quiet sadness she hadn’t shared with anyone. It wasn’t that she wanted to keep it to herself; it was just hard to explain.
Danny, sensing the stillness in her, leaned back against the couch. Without a word, he shifted, making room as he laid down on the other side, and gently encouraged her to stretch her legs out. She hesitated for a second, but then did as he suggested, resting her legs across his lap. He mindlessly began to soothe one of them, his hand moving in soft circles as he waited for her to speak, giving her space but showing he was right there, present.
After a long moment, (Y/N) sighed softly, breaking the silence. She shifted slightly, her voice quiet, but steady. "You know," she began, "I think I’m burned out… I’ve been doing so much lately, always trying to get things done and it never seems like I’m doing enough." Her fingers absently traced the rim of her glass, her eyes not quite meeting his.
"It’s been hard to shake off. And honestly… I don’t even know if it’s worth it anymore. I mean… I’m trying to build something for myself, but it feels like everything’s slipping away. Work’s been a mess, and I’m barely holding it together. I don’t even know if I’m doing right by my family anymore." She paused, looking away, her throat tightening slightly. "I’ve spent so much time away from them, trying to prove I can do it… but at what cost? It feels like I’m losing control over everything I’ve worked so hard for."
Danny’s expression softened as he heard the vulnerability in her words. He could see it — the exhaustion, the frustration that had built up. His hand never stopped moving in slow, reassuring circles, and he shifted, propping himself up on one elbow so he could look at her more closely. "I get it. I really do. But you’re trying to carry so much on your own. No one can do that forever."
She let out a shaky breath, her voice thick with emotion. "I don’t even know how to let go of it all, though. I’m scared that if I do, everything I’ve been working for will just... disappear."
Danny shook his head slowly, his voice steady, but firm. He was a man who didn’t mince words, especially when it came to matters of the heart. "Look, (Y/N), I know how much you care and how you’re determined to build something great for yourself and for us. But let me tell you something — you can’t keep pushing yourself like this. You’re not a machine, and you’re not meant to do this alone." He paused, giving her a moment to take in his words before continuing. "What’s the point of all the success, if it means you’re losing yourself in the process? And what’s the point if you don’t have the people who love you around to share it with? You don’t have to do everything perfectly, and you sure as hell don’t have to do it to prove to something to yourself or anyone else. I’m here, every step of the way, just like I’ve always been, and I’ve seen the wonders you’ve done with so little in your hands. You’re a doer, always been… But I need you to trust that it’s okay to rest and lean on me, and on the people who care about you whenever you feel like it.”
He shifted to face her, his gaze softening as he spoke, but there was strength in his words. "I can’t tell you what the right decision is. Only you can figure that out. But I’ll be here to support you, even when you don’t have it all figured out. That’s what we’re supposed to do for each other. And you know what? It’s okay to let go sometimes. It doesn’t mean you’re giving up or that everything’s falling apart. It just means you’re human."
(Y/N) blinked, feeling a tear slip down her cheek. She hadn’t realized how much she needed to hear that, or how much she had been holding back. For the first time in a while, she felt the tight grip she had on her thoughts loosen a little.
Danny closed the distance between them, wrapping her in a tight embrace that she immediately reciprocated, her head resting against his chest. He pressed a lingering kiss to the top of her head, his hand moving in slow, soothing circles down her back, offering comfort without saying a word. There was nothing more to do in that moment—just be there, present for each other, and that alone was enough.
A familiar melody drifted through the speakers, low and steady in the background.
Danny recognized it instantly. It was one of his favorite songs—one she had introduced to him years ago in the middle of a record store.
He could still picture it vividly: her eyes lighting up as she flipped through vinyls, excitement spilling from her lips as she pressed a pair of headphones over his ears. That was the moment he really saw her. Not just as his best friend, not just as someone he cared about, but as something more—someone who felt like home.
And now, years later, that same song played between them. Danny glanced down at her, a quiet thought forming before he acted on impulse. Without hesitation, he rose from the sofa, his hands slipping to the curve of her back as he gently pulled her with him. She gave him a confused look, but he only smiled, guiding her into movement, slow and effortless, swaying to the deep rhythm of the music.
"I'm not about to waste this opportunity," he murmured, his grin widening when he saw the corner of her lips twitch up. His hands found hers, lifting them to rest on his shoulders, while his own slid down to her waist, keeping her close.
“Remember this song?” he asked, his voice laced with nostalgia.
Her expression softened as she nodded. “Of course I remember… Why wouldn’t I?”
They moved in sync, their bodies close and their steps unhurried. It was intimate in a way that words couldn’t quite capture—something between them that had always been there, something unspoken yet deeply understood.
There was a time when this moment had been nothing more than a distant dream, a quiet wish. Now, it was their reality, theirs to hold onto whenever they wanted.
As the song neared its end, Danny’s movements slowed, his grip tightening ever so slightly as his gaze flickered over her face. He dipped his head, his lips brushing softly against her cheek, trailing a path along her jaw, lingering at the birthmark just above her lips—one of his favorite details about her.
His hands moved with an ease that came from knowing her so well, gliding gently over her body as if committing every curve to memory.
When his hands found their way to the sides of her neck, his thumbs resting just below her jaw, she instinctively tilted her head up, her breath catching in anticipation.
Danny studied her for a brief moment, his expression unreadable—until his thumb ghosted over her bottom lip, and he finally closed the space between them.
The kiss was slow, deliberate. A deep, lingering exploration that held no urgency—only purpose. His lips moved against hers in a rhythm that felt like second nature, savoring the way she softened beneath his touch. His hold on her grew firmer, pulling her just that little bit closer, grounding them both in the moment.
There was something about the way he kissed her—like he had all the time in the world. Like there was nowhere else he'd rather be, nothing else he’d rather be doing than this—than her. The lazy drag of his lips, the way his tongue barely brushed against hers before retreating, teasing, deepening the kiss just enough to leave her wanting more.
And maybe that was the point.
When they finally parted, her lips were swollen, her breath uneven, her fingers still gripping the fabric of his shirt as if to steady herself. Danny took in the sight of her, his own breathing slightly heavier, his hands still cradling her face like she was something fragile, something precious.
She sighed, a soft, content sound that filled the space between them.
"Thank you," she whispered, her voice tinged with something raw, something deeply felt. "For everything."
Danny smiled, brushing a stray strand of hair behind her ear. His voice was quiet but certain as he murmured, "That’s why I’m here, baby… You’re never alone in this, not with me around."
He pressed a kiss to her forehead, lingering just a little longer than necessary before pulling her back into his arms. And as they stood there, wrapped up in each other, she finally let herself believe it. That no matter what happened—no matter how heavy life got—he would always be right there, holding her through it all.
————————————
Just a quick little idea of something I couldn’t get out of my head. Soon there will be a new part for “You, Always.”
Still wanting to read more? Here are some other Danny's shots to read. You're welcome!!!!
#danny ramirez#danny ramirez fic#danny ramirez x (y/n)#danny ramirez x you#danny ramirez x reader#fanboy#joaquin torres#fanboy x reader#joaquin torres x reader#joaquin torres x you#danny ramirez fluff#danny ramirez gif#joaquin torres fluff#joaquin torres fic#mickey garcia
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What about IDW Stone?
What would happen in the metal virus arc?
Well, well, well...
I think this depends on if Stone works for Eggman before the Metal Virus arc, or if he's introduced with the Metal Virus arc.
Let's explore both, shall we? ;D
If Stone had been present before the Metal Virus arc, we first need to tackle a few things: 1- What happened before this? 2- How does Starline fit into all of this? I think Stone would've found Eggman around the same time as Sonic and Shadow. However, upon finding out he has amnesia, Stone simply stays near him and makes sure he's safe.
But... Once Tinker makes Belle, she and Stone start to bond a little. Maybe Belle asked Stone to take her somewhere to get more wood for their workshop.
And that's when Rough and Tumble take Tinker away.
Upon finding out Eggman's away, he tells Belle to stay at home safe, and that he'll go find him.
And Stone reaches the base Starline's keeping him around the same time Metal Sonic does. Eggman recovers his memories, and the Metal Virus arc begins.
Now, let's talk Stone and Starline, cause I think this would be very interesting.
Starline shows up, seven Chaos Emeralds in hand, praising Eggman non-stop. For some time, Starline takes up Stone's place as Eggman's main assistant, which does kind of upset Stone, but he still keeps doing his job and all that.
Eggman begins his Metal Virus attacks, Sonic is infected, chaos is spread... And then we reach what would be IDW's issue 23.
Starline feels disappointed about Eggman, and how "the man simply doesn't meassure up".
Sonic jumps out at Eggman to try and infect him, but in that moment, instead of falling off, Stone interveens, kicking Sonic away in order to protect Eggman, and falls with Sonic.
Of course, Eggman quickly grabs Stone with a claw extending from his EggMobile, and the trio fly away, leaving Sonic to be consumed by the hoard.
However, upon getting back to their base... Stone finds out he's infected, and tells Eggman.
Now comes the big riff:
Starline insists on just kicking him out of the base, and how he's a liability to them.
Eggman, however, refuses.
Stone has been there for him for who knows how many years (Let's say, since Sonic Adventure 2, Stone being introduced as a G.U.N. agent that jumps ship and is who gives Eggman all the information about Project Shadow and his grandfather), and if Eggman does have something, is that if you do not betray him and stick by his side, he will stay by your side too (See, once again, SA2, and how he tells Shadow to continue their plans if anything happened to him in his confrontation aboard the ARK with Sonic and Tails).
So, Eggman takes Stone and puts him in a capsule, and promises to actually find a cure for him. Starline, however, gets worried that Sonic and friends could get a hold of said cure, making their efforts unnecessary (I am guessing Starline came with a reasoning as to why Eggman hadn't made a cure yet).
They, however, still have the issue that they can't control the Zombots. So Starline brings over the Zeti.
From this point onward, the story stays relatively simmilar (Starline loses control of the Zeti, Eggman fires him as his assistant, Eggman and Sonic team up to figure out a cure), with just a small change at the end: Instead of Eggman being zombotified by Froggy, it's a fully infected Stone the one that does so (Zavok is just that much of an asshole and knew that would hurt Eggman extra, specially due to the fact that Eggman never saw Stone fully zombotified, just partially).
Sonic, Metal and Silver team up, get rid of the Metal Virus, happy ending.
Stone does ask about Starline upon regaining conciousness, wondering where he was. Eggman just says that "he betrayed them" and doesn't mention Starline again.
That's for Stone being an established character before the Metal virus arc.
Let's now talk about Stone being introduced in the Metal Virus arc.
Taking the idea of the Sonic world being occupied by just animals (Since we don't see any other human in IDW), Eggman and Starline just move forward with the Metal Virus plans.
Things, however, make a slight change in issue 23.
Upon falling into the zombot hoard, Eggman is surronded by them. However, just as he's about to be touched by one...
BAM! A human just appears in the middle of nowhere. He calls out to Eggman, and makes his way through the Zombots, keeping them at bay as Eggman follows the stranger into a house.
Eggman is surprised to find another human, but more so that someone would help him in the midst of the Metal Virus crisis.
Stone introduces himself, and explains how he has been on the run for many years, being treated poorly by the towns and cities populated by animals, and having to hide most of the time.
As he explains this, though, he plumets down in excruciating pain. Eggman is about to try and tend to him, but noticed that he's infected.
Stone, however, mentions that it's already been several days since he was infected. It seems like the Metal Virus, for some reason, spreads slower on humans. But, it causes an inmense pain as it does.
Eggman decides to try and help Stone if he allows himself to be a guinea pig to further their research into the Metal Virus, in an attempt to figure out how to control the Zombots.
He agrees, and it's then that Starline calls out from outside the house. At first, he lets Eggman get on to his ship, but refuses to allow Stone anywhere near. In the end he gives in to Eggman's wishes and just takes Stone tied to a rope, dangling off his ship.
From this point on, things remain relatively the same (Stone is taken into a capsule, Starline brings in the Zeti, Sonic and Eggman team up, Sonic/Metal/Silver save the day).
This time, though. Stone was never taken out of the capsule. So when Eggman returns to his base, he finds the man there, cured. Stone, not knowing what had happened, simply believes Eggman when he tells him that he's obviously the one that created the cure, and how they wouldn't have made it without him and Metal Sonic.
Now that he has also fired Starline, he offers his position to Stone, and he excitedly agrees, becoming a main staple in the story.
And that's what I've got! I hope you liked my small idea, anon! <3
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Kagari Amagase
The Dangerous Lynx Clumsily Seeks Affection
**Really quick, I want to make this note to show appreciation for the other amazing people who translated this story too! There’s one by Cirilla-fiona-riannon, Cosmowgyral, and Cheshireliam! They put a lot of effort into it and are great at what they do, so please check out their posts and show your support! Thank you!!🌹
Ch1 | Ch2 | Ch3 | His POV | Epilogue
Some time had passed since I visited Ruby with the owner, and today, the town was livelier than usual, bustling with energy.
Emma: “Prince Kagari’s birthday?”
Townswoman: “That's right! It’s become a tradition for the whole town to celebrate it.”
Emma: “So that’s why it’s so lively today...”
(I had no idea today was Prince Kagari’s birthday.)
The townspeople seemed to be in high spirits, and the scent of dorayaki wafted from every direction.
Townswoman: “You should also join in on the celebration.”
Townswoman: “I’m sure Prince Kagari would be delighted if someone like his favorite were to celebrate with him”
The woman, whom I had become acquainted with after coming to Ruby, gave me a bright, innocent smile, gently encouraging me.
Townswoman: “Come, come! If you’re having trouble picking a present, I can help you decide.”
Emma: “Thank you, but since this is a special occasion, I’d like to think of something on my own.”
(What’s going on? I feel like I’m being pressured somehow… or maybe it’s just my imagination?)
Seemingly satisfied with my answer, the woman cheerfully wished me luck before walking away.
(Setting aside whether or not I’m his.... ‘favorite’, Prince Kagari has helped me countless times since I came to Ruby.)
(Now that I know it's his birthday, there’s no way I won’t celebrate!)
(Alright...!)
....
(...Huh, what’s with this long line!?)
When I arrived at the castle with the present tucked in my bag, I was met with an overwhelming crowd of people in the square that had also come to celebrate the demon.
(Swordsmen, nobles… and even commoners. There’s so many people here!)
Then, I spotted a figure with striking red hair at the front of the line.
Even from afar, I could see Prince Kagari expressionlessly accepting an unending stream of congratulatory words and gifts.
(He looks completely indifferent, like it has nothing to do with him. He doesn’t seem to be enjoying it at all.)
I stood on my toes to get a better look when, suddenly, our eyes met.
(...Prince Kagari was always quick to sense people’s gazes, so he probably noticed me.)
(I might have been staring too much and distracted him.)
I quickly averted my eyes and took refuge under a nearby cherry blossom tree.
(Still, what should I do? With so many people here, it’ll be difficult to find a chance to give him my gift.)
(I wanted to do it on his actual birthday, but maybe I should come back another day—wait, huh?)
When I absentmindedly glanced back, Prince Kagari was no longer there.
Instead, standing there was one of his aides.
And strangely enough, despite the Demon himself no longer being there, people were still offering their wishes and gifts as if nothing happened.
It was a strange sight.
???: “You’re wide open, Princess.”
(!?)
I turned around at the sudden whisper in my ear, only to have my mouth covered by a hand.
Before I could react, I was swiftly pulled into the shade of the tree, my back softly hitting against the rough bark.
Emma: “Mmph...!”
(When did Prince Kagari get behind me...!?)
I struggled, but he effortlessly pinned me against the tree, bringing his face dangerously close.
I thought my heart might stop.
Kagari: “Will you promise to stay quiet?”
I nodded eagerly, and finally, he removed his hand from my mouth.
But the distance between us didn’t change, his arms still trapping me between him and the tree.
(Calm down, Emma.)
(Prince Kagari is probably just sticking close to avoid being seen by anyone.)
I instinctively lower my voice, being careful not to let my breath reach him.
Emma: “...Why are you here, Prince Kagari?”
Kagari: “I saw you.”
Emma: “Were you looking for me?”
Kagari: “You had called for me.”
(Is that how it looked to him…?)
I felt both a sense of guilt and a strange fluttering in my chest.
Kagari: “If you were planning to wait in line, I’d advise against it.”
Kagari: “That line won’t end until nightfall.”
Emma: “It’s that long…?”
Kagari: “Then there’s a banquet tonight that lasts until dawn.”
(They really put their all into celebrating the entire day. But that's to be expected for someone as important as the Demon of Kogyoku.)
Even while I was impressed by it all, Prince Kagari’s expression remained unreadable.
He gazed at the never-ending line with a look so cold that made it hard to believe he was the one being celebrated.
(I guess Prince Kagari isn’t interested in celebrating his own birthday.)
(...What if he thinks I'm being a bother?)
Kagari: “So, why are you here?”
I instinctively looked away.
Emma: “……Um……since so many people had gathered, I was just curious and…”
(I can’t bring myself to say that I came to celebrate, too.)
I shift my bag behind me, hiding the gift inside.
Prince Kagari fell silent for a moment.
The awkward silence stretches for so long that the distant noise of the town feels even farther away.
(Did he see through me…?)
However, instead of pressing the matter, he simply grabs my wrist.
Kagari: “Princess, will you come with me?”
Emma: “Huh? I… Prince Kagari?”
Despite his words, he somewhat forcibly led me through the crowd, keeping us out of sight as we made our way toward the castle...
Once inside, he tossed me into a room before returning with a large basket from somewhere.
Kagari: “First, put this on.”
Emma: “A...Hakama?”
Kagari: “Then wrap this around your face.”
Emma: “A scarf?”
Kagari: “Finally, hangthis on your waist.”
Emma: “…A sword!?”
Kagari: “And tie your hair up.”
Emma: “Um…?”
(Why is he suddenly making me change clothes?)
I tilt my head in confusion as I take the items he handed me, one after another.
Then, Prince Kagari picks up the hakama and reaches for my clothes.
Kagari: “If you don’t know how to put it on, I’ll help you.”
Emma: “—No! I-I’ll do as much as I can on my own!”
(I’m not sure what’s going on, but it should be fine, right...?)
........
(—So, why is this happening...?)
Next
Please feel free to skip this part! I’ve been interested in occasionally doing translation notes, explaining some terminology that I think are a bit nuanced or have multiple translations. Sorry if it’s a bit wordy but hopefully it’s helpful if you ever run into words like these or just fun to read! ❤️
*Translation notes:
山猫: The literal translation of this is mountain cat; 山 (yama) - mountain, 猫 (neko) - cat. It’s often translated to wildcat; however, seeing the animal on Kagari’s motif, I think it’s possible that they are referring to a lynx (specifically a Euroasian lynx) but I might be wrong!
おひいさん: I’m preeetty sure his nickname for Emma “おひいさん” (o-hii-san) is just a derivative of おひいさま(o-hii-sama)….. which then derives from おひめさま (o-hime-sama) lol. The literal translation for all of this is princess, but, as Emma isnt a princess in the literal sense, it becomes nuanced to mean a lady with a pure heart, yet naive/ignorant to what’s going on in the world. (Hopefully that make sense 😭)
*From what I've seen, when “ああ” is used in manga, anime, game, etc.. more often than not, it means “yeah” or “yep”. It’s not really something said in everyday life, but more of a stylistic choice made to add charm to a character's dialogue.
Those are the only notes I could come up with off the top of my head, but, again, I hope it was helpful!!🌹
Next
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so ive just read UTRH and ok. i dont know if jason can ever be comfortable around his family to like, not be an asshole to them? like yes he wasnt an asshole to the batfam in the webcomic Redhood and the Outlaws but the webcomic also nerfed him really hard (they take away his batman funding so jason flies economy rather than just steal money? ok jan).
idk. im having a lot of conflicting feelings about jason. mostly "maybe if you stop being an asshole to your family they'll stop being assholes to you" but also "you should stop trying to seek validation from your family and go back to using real bullets"
See I really don't like any rhato media including the webcomic I just feel like it all really misunderstands Jasons anger and changes his character too much - in utrh Jasons anger is 100% just being angry at Bruce he says he's pissed bc Bruce didn't avenge him after he died especially bc it was joker who killed him the most unredeemable person in existence - then they do something really interesting in countdown where its explored more if Bruce killing the joker would actually make Jason happy and the answer is firmly no which furthers the question why did Jason want Bruce to the kill the joker even though he knows Bruce never would and the answer is simply bc he knew Bruce wouldn't he wanted Bruce to fail bc he needed a reason to be angry at Bruce he needed his anger to be justified bc he never took the time to really examine why he felt the way he did - which leads me to the point I want to make Jason will never be able to play happy families with this other bat's until he does a fuck ton of soul searching to really figure out why he was so angry post resurrection and if there is any possible future where he could co exist with the bat's or if its better that he stays away
#Ask#Anon#Jasons character really was going somewhere before n52#I even like his pure villain arc#Bc I can twist it as#Even after Bruce died Jason was still angrywl#And instead of putting effort into figuring out why that is#He lashes out at dick and damian#Also did I use this ask to just discuss Jasons character again bc I'm actually feral about him#Mmmm ye
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Do you really think youre better than rich people just because you don't have money?
of course i do, lmao, &i'm fucking right, too.
💘🌹💋
#the Poor™ builds character isnt that what they want us all to think anyway?#its probably the one thing rich ppl actually have correct in the grand scheme of things--#ive never met a person who would consider themself rich who wasnt made of skin&feelings as thick as rice paper lmao.#why else do you think nepo babies have made such an obscene spectacle of themselves#bc theyre finding out money can buy everything but the lie of actual talent or individual success#from ppl who ACTUALLY have to put in effort to the things they do bc theres no safety net in the form of mommy+daddys money lmao.#why else do you think old money is so comfortable having their access to money literally define their whole families#but the second you bring up the WHERE of how the family cash&legacy came to be its all 'but that wasnt ME im not THEM#thats all ANCIENT HISTORY' lmao.#it aint my fault im a real person w depth&talent derived from years of practice that i needed to figure out myself#nor is it my fault ppl w money have never had to be real ppl bc they could afford not to be lmao.#maybe they can just pull themselves up by their bootstraps&develop into real ppl one day instead of shallow husks of selfish frivolity. ♡#💌
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First time wearing my completed leg warmers out…and they had both fallen down by the end of the street.
#I have knit five leg warmers at this point#I even thought the right one would be too tight bc my right leg is inexplicably bigger#I put so much effort into figuring out shaping with a lace pattern#like. FUCK.#‘why is the only knitwear you complete and wear shawls?’ Well You See#I think I’m just gonna have to rip em out and make gaiters instead#AT LEAST IF I HAVR TO REDO THOSR ITLL TAKE HALF THE TIME#bramble bramble
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my worry with the premonitions of Tumblr going under is the idea of moving to a new platform to keep with the community of little weirdos in my phone (I don't interact much but I do Like It Here) and the worry that the next platform that gets migrated to is built on the same "oh haha we'll figure the profit part out later" that has landed much of the modern web where it is today. I don't want to put energy into being part of a community somewhere else if that uncertainty of what happens when the initial capital runs out comes up again yk?
#its just ugh#like why bother putting effort into participating in a site#getting to know people#joining a community#and then having the site admins swoop down and say yeah we didnt figure out how to make this sustainable so everything shall instead explode#in 12 months like okay! cool!#not to say tumblr has only a year left but you get the point#maybe i just need to get a good nights worth of sleep instead of raiding so i can get my head straight#but tumblr was sort of last social media i was willing to be a part of given the state of The Others
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—Hair tie
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Pairing: Kang Dae-ho x lover!fem!reader
Summary: why hunt down his own hair ties when he could just steal yours instead?
Content: fluff, kisses, no games au, Dae-ho being a hair tie thief, english isn't my first language, mistakes should be present, sorry!
Word count: ~ 0.9k
The drawer was almost empty again.
You frowned, pulling it open further, as if the motion would magically summon the missing hair ties back into existence. But no, there were just two lonesome bands left. Your favorite blue one—gone. The black one that never snagged—gone.
You always kept your hair ties in a little wooden drawer, nestled among your earrings. But now, as you reached for one to tie up your hair with before washing your face, you only found there were two left.
You were meticulous about these things, always buying extras and keeping them in neat little rows. And yet, they seemed to vanish.
At first, you didn’t think much of it. You figured you might’ve misplaced them or accidentally lost a few. But then, you saw him—Dae-ho, the sweet, clingy man you adored—sitting on the couch with one of your black hair ties securing his messy ponytail.
You stared for a moment, confused. “Is that… mine?”
Dae-ho looked up from his book, his lips parting slightly as he realized what you were pointing at. Then he grinned sheepishly. “Oh… yeah. I couldn’t find mine, and, well, yours was just there…”
“Dae-ho!” you laughed, more amused than annoyed. “You could’ve asked.”
“I was going to put them back,” he said, looking so guilty you almost felt bad for teasing him. Almost. “I didn’t think you’d notice.”
“Of course I’d notice. My stash is gone because of you.”
He frowned softly, putting the book down and opening his arms, as if begging for a hug after being scolded by you.
His hand reached up to tug at the tie in his hair, looking up at you as you made your way over to him with a small sigh. “Do you want this one back?” he asked softly, worried you might actually be upset at him.
You shook your head as his arms wrapped around you, unable to resist when he started spreading little kisses on your forehead and temple. “No, you can keep it.” you hummed.
From that moment on, it became a habit—one you found a bit endearing, if you were being honest. Whenever Dae-ho needed a hair tie, he’d raid your wooden drawer without a second thought.
Sometimes he tried to be sneaky about it, but he wasn’t exactly subtle. You’d catch him rifling through your things, his broad shoulders hunched like a child caught stealing cookies.
Other times, he didn’t bother hiding it at all, simply plucking one from the drawer with a soft grin and a quick kiss on your lips—then a kiss on your face, as if that would make you forgive him. And it always did.
He didn’t mean to always steal your hair ties, not really. It was just... easier for him to snatch one from the drawer than to hunt down his own.
You didn’t really mind. Not on most days, anyway.
One evening though, you did need a hair tie—desperately.
You were halfway through making dinner when a gust of wind from the open window sent a strand of hair into your face. Cursing under your breath, you tucked it behind your ear, only for another strand to escape. The kitchen was too hot, the recipe was more effort than you’d anticipated, and your hair, usually manageable, felt like an uncooperative child refusing to behave.
“Dae-ho!” you called, wiping your hands on a dish towel.
He appeared in the doorway a moment later, his expression somewhere between apologetic and guilty, as if he already knew what you called out to him about. His hair was tied back, as usual, and you could see one of your missing hair ties keeping it in place.
“Yes... love?” he asked, his voice so soft and warm it nearly melted your resolve.
“I need a hair tie,” you said, folding your arms. “And it seems you’ve taken all of mine.”
He blinked, then glanced down at his wrist. You hadn’t noticed before, but he had a spare hair tie looped around it—your hair tie. Without hesitation, he pulled it off and handed it to you, a small smile tugging at his lips.
“Here,” he said. “I always keep an extra for you. Just in case.”
For a moment, you were too stunned to speak. You stared at the hair tie in his hand, then back at his face. He looked so earnest, his eyes warm and full of love. It wasn’t just that he had thought to keep a spare for you—it was the fact that he had done it so naturally, so effortlessly, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, even if he had taken it from you in the first place.
You took the band, your chest tightening with a wave of affection. He stepped closer to kiss the top of your head, his arms looping around your waist. “Don’t be mad. I love you.” he murmured softly, his nose buried in your hair as he nuzzled against you.
“I love you too, you thief,” you muttered, though there was no bite to your words. How could there be, when he was wrapped around you like that? Adorable and impossible to be mad at.
#kang dae ho#kang dae ho x reader#kang daeho#squid game#player 388#kang daeho x reader#squid game fanfic#squid game fic#squid game imagine#squid game x y/n#squid game season 2#squid game x reader#squid game x you#dae ho#dae ho x reader#dae ho fluff#player 388 x reader
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How I think the Batboys + Clark would respond to you asking them to "dress up" in some capacity for them in the bedroom like you always do for them.
"I'm always the one in lingerie, why don't you dress up for me for a change?"
---___---___---___---___---___---___---___---___---_
Bruce: Will go for the most petty response possible, by keeping his tie on the next time you're intimate. Which, he meant mostly as a sarcastic joke, but found himself enjoying. You also seemed to be incredibly fond of it, tugging it in between your teeth or biting at it around his neck. When it was covered in your spit from all the biting, it eventually slipped off his neck and got wrapped around your wrists, tightened to keep you in place. And when you resisted it after a bit (lovingly, of course) he untied it, pushing it back into your mouth to muffle your sounds. Who knew a tie was so versatile?
---
Dick: Has no problem with complying when you ask him to dress up. None. You make a fair point and it's only fair he puts in some effort and he's secure enough in his masculinity to do anything you ask. This is the same man who went as discowing for a while, after all. A garter? You're foaming at your mouth. You want him to wear some sort of dress or actual lingerie? He'll have to buy it since yours definitely wouldn't fit, but he'll absolutely get something flattering. A bit of roleplay, to fit, if it was something themed? It's a given. How could he not fully commit?
---
Jason: Would roll his eyes, not because he's annoyed but because he thinks he'd look ridiculous and he cares more about worshipping you than letting you take care of him. That said, If you wanted something different, he'd do something different. The next time he comes home from patrol, instead of taking his stuff off and changing, he stays in it, making you take it off. The leather of his gloves twirling your hair as you unbuckled things, the feeling of your hands tugging his jacket off, is enticing for both of you. And by the time he's nearly fully undressed, you're both desperate. The helmet is the last to go. And it only does after he whispers a few things he knew you'd like in your ear.
---
Tim: Has no idea what that even means, honestly. It could be a joke, maybe. But better safe than sorry if not. Since he didn't quite know, he went with the safest option that could still qualify and wore a see through button up under his jacket, with his slacks for an event, letting you see it later that night. You seemed happy, if not a little frustrated for him having it on all night without knowing. Probably because if you'd seen him in a sheer black top, showing off his chest and stomach, you'd pull him into the bathroom and take it off right there.
---
(Aged up) Damian: Isn't entirely unused to flamboyancy in one way or another. He wore plenty of nice robes and wraps for the League of Assassins, not to mention suits for his father's events. But that was a normal thing, he supposed. So, if you wanted something different, he'd have to think outside of the box. He's always liked art, ever since he was young and even considered making love to be an art in itself, in a way. So, the next time you're in his room, tugging off his clothes, you're surprised when he's covered in henna, little swirls, dots, even flowers. It had taken hours, but was absolutely worth it for the look on your face.
---
Clark: Was befuddled, like he often was when you said that. He had no idea how to dress up for you, or even why you'd want him to. But when you guys spend a weekend at the farm and he catches your eyes lingering when he's working in the yard, he figures it out. When you're home, several days after the visit ended, you find him in overalls and nothing else, except for a cowboy hat, he usually wore to keep the sun out of his eyes. And it was fun, he'll admit, seeing you get excited. The hat looked much better on you, though.
#x reader#headcanon#jason todd#jason todd x reader#batboys#dick grayson imagine#plethorawrites#bruce wayne x you#tim drake x you#older damian wayne#damian wayne x you#clark kent x you#dick grayson x you#tim drake x reader#clark kent x reader#damian wayne x reader
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Tim who’s a femme boy but not in a ‘skater skirt and thigh high socks’ kind of way.
No, he was raised by two people who value tradition and fashion, teaching him the ways of old money.
He watched his mother, who worked with woman who married into families and worse low cut dresses and diamond necklaces, hold the same power over men with only her wrist and head bare. He learnt that modesty was as equally powerful as nudity, that a woman could be devastating in any fabric if she out in the work.
Tim has always known he isn’t a woman, is comfortable being a man, but by all that’s natural does he not look at the way they dress and feel longing.
He’s twelve when he tries one of his mother’s dresses on for the first time.
It’s far too long, puddling at his feet, but he feels so beautiful in the mossy green fabric. The elbow length sleeves go to his wrist, but it still feels almost scandalous in a way that isn’t about the dress being on a boy.
He puts the dress away and begins to buy his own.
Naturally, he doesn’t risk his parents ire and keeps them hidden, but with them being gone so long it’s easy for him to spend some time by himself to dress up all he likes.
By the time he’s fourteen and has been around in for a while, he’s managed to go through a few different styles and find what truely feels like him.
He still wears his stupid science shirts and baggy hoodies over his formal dress shirts, it’s just that now he might add a simple long skirt instead of his dirty jeans. He won’t skate in a skirt, only because he doesn’t want to damage them and jeans are safer, but he also doesn’t leave the house in them for a while.
It’s not long after he’s recovered from Jason’s attack, his former idol still having trouble coming to terms with the lies he was told by the LOA, that he decides to see what Bruce thinks.
Ironically, it’s Jason that gave him the confidence.
Jason had made a comment when he was going on his rant to Tim about how Robin shouldn’t exist and he should get out, that he was warning the boy he should cut and run from Bruce. All he had said was that he was cutting his life short by being Robin and Tim felt that comment hit him harder than the bullet to his leg.
His time was short, most likely he would die before he got to marry or maybe even graduate (though he was considering dropping out anyway), so why hide?
Tim had been just about to get changed before he left to go see Bruce for a checkup on his mostly healed injuries when he caught his reflection and stopped.
The white shirt he wore was long sleeved and covered his neck, the buttons going up the front made of wood and shaped like hearts. His skirt, a dark brown flannel pattern prove that went just above his ankles, had a corset like fitting at the top that hugged his waist carefully. While he would prefer a more womanly figure, he wasn’t going to implement old Victorian body horror to get that.
Tim did go back to his room, but only to put on some simple heeled shoes of brown leather with a gold buckle on the side.
He put on a big shall over his shoulders, picking up his phone and putting on his headphones before he made the walk to Wayne Manor.
As usual, he didn’t need to knock as Alfred opened the door.
The man didn’t give any inkling as to surprise or shock at Tim’s outfit and simple said, “Glad to see you putting some effort into your appearance, Master Timothy.”
The snide comment made Tim relax greatly, quipping back about him being able to wear more than just jeans and t-shirts to the older man. The two talked normally and that made everything feel so much better than some grand speech on Tim accepted who he is.
Dick and Bruce are talking to each other in polite voices, both still a little awkward with each other even if they have gotten better, and both turn to great Tim as he enters the dining room for dinner.
Bruce looks shocked, showing he isn’t feeling too much like Batman at the moment, but he covers it up and says nothing and lets Dick speak.
Tim immediately feels stupid as Dick walks up to him with a big smile and opens arms, because Dick Grayson was raised in a circus! If anyone was going to accept ‘oddities’ in the family it would be him, “Timmy! Oh my little baby, you look so good! What’s the occasion? Oh! Do you have a date?”
His brothers teasing mg tone at the end makes him smile and shove him gently. “Not a date or anything else, I just… thought I’d wear something more my style out for once.”
Dick beamed, hearing the unspoken confession of trust and picking his brother up and spinning him around, “Oh, Timmyyyy! My baby, you look so beautiful! You can wear whatever you want, all the time, anywhere! I’ll will straight up eat anyone who has a problem, I swear I will do it, just say the word-“
Bruce finally talks just to cut Dick off, “Dick, no ‘eating’ anyone who hurts your bother. A lawsuit will surfice.”
Tim can’t help but beam at Bruce, knowing full well that those words are his weird way of showing his approval and acceptance. Him being more forward with it would have been nicer, but he was the most fluent in the language of Bruce Wayne outside of Alfred and so he was okay with it.
Dick went to whine, acting like a spoilt child while he secretly raged inside that he was being told not to commit a violent act. Honestly, Tim wasn’t sure if it was because it was in defence of his brother or because Dick was always secretly searching for something to get aggressive with.
Tim smiled happily, taking off his shawl and thanking Alfred when he swooped in to take it away for him.
As Tim sat at the table, he felt a peace build in his heart that he hadn’t felt… well, ever.
#batfam#tim drake#bat family#dc comics#batfamily#dc universe#dc#tim drake is red robin#tim drake is a menace#femme tim drake#fem tim drake#jason todd#dick grayson#bruce wayne#nighwing#Batman#batman and robin#red robin#cross dressing
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JJK Men Making Up With You After A Fight
Characters: Gojo Satoru, Nanami Kento, Ryomen Sukuna, FAB!Reader
Content Warning: sex, makeup sex, fighting, public sex, choking, dirty talk!
Word Count: 5,453
A/N: Hot diggity damn, makeup sex time. Gojo’s had me cackling!! As always, requests are open!! I don’t bite. . unless you ask nicely 😈
Gojo Satoru
Your phone buzzed in your pocket, and you ignored it, much like the other ten times it rang. You instead headed for the concession stand at the theater. Your boyfriend, Satoru Gojo, had pissed you off beyond all means. He'd forgotten all about your date. The specific date you had been planning for a month. You intended to celebrate at the fanciest restaurant and made reservations two weeks ago. All for him! Because they had world-class desserts.
You got there before him; they took you to your private table. Where you waited, and waited, and waited. Finally, forty-five minutes later, you called him.
“Hey, babe!” He said over the sound background chatter. “What's up? I'm out at the new cafe with Suguru and Nanami!”
“Oh?” Gritting your teeth, you tapped your nails against the table. “Are you having fun?” The tone of your voice was bitter and cold.
Your boyfriend hesitated, “Uhm yeah, the desserts are delicious.” Rage boiled in your gut.
“You know who else has delicious desserts?” He hummed, but you didn't give him a chance to answer. “The restaurant I'm at! You know the one I made reservations for three weeks ago?!”
You could practically see the fear in your boyfriend's voice. “Oh fuck, shit! That was tonight?! Stay there; I'll be there in a couple of minutes.” Your eyes stung with unshed tears.
“No, you can come, but I won't be here.”
You had done just as you said, quickly paying for your tab before hurrying out of the restaurant before Gojo could teleport there. You crossed the street, heading towards the movie theater. There was not a chance in hell he would find you in here. You were heartbroken; all the effort you put into your date was wasted.
You sat in the very back of the empty theater. You were feeling some ease that there was no one here. Then again, they were playing older movies anyone could stream nowadays. You seriously doubted anyone would be joining you to watch Titanic. You could zone out, cool down, and try to figure out what to say to Satoru the next time you see him.
As the opening credits started to play, you heard a door slam open. Peeking down, you choked on popcorn as you noticed your boyfriend scanning the theater. Bright blue eyes seemed to glow as he held his blindfold in one hand. Fuck! Fuck! Fuckin stupid Six-Eyes! Those blue eyes instantly found you, and you could see the relief wash over Satoru. You hid your face behind the bucket of popcorn, internally groaning as you heard him bounding up the stairs.
“Y/N! Why didn’t you wait for me?!” You ignored him, slowly lowering the bucket to stare at the movie screen. “Hey, hello?”
“Shh!” You scolded before stuffing more popcorn in your mouth. Avoiding his questions altogether.
His shoes stepped over the soda-sticky floor, blocking your view of the screen. “We need to talk.” His hand gently reached out, index finger lifting your chin to look up at him.
“Fuck you.” You said, getting up and moving further down the row, plopping down in a seat.
“Y/N baby!” The groan he let out had you rolling your eyes. “Please, I’m sorry I forgot!” He bounded after you, only for you to get up stepping into the lower row. Your action had Gojo stopping in his tracks, the two of you staring at each other. “Are you playing keep away?”
A rich laugh escaped him, one that was full of humor and delight. It had him hunching over as he cackled. You hated it, but you found your smile tugging at your lips. Here he was, groaning and whining like a child, and you weren’t any better. You were running away from him, pouting like a toddler that didn’t get their way.
Gojo’s laughter the tears forming in his eyes, had your heart feeling lighter. God, he was such a cutie. A cutie who forgot all about your date. A date you’d spent time, money, and energy on! All for his benefit. Holy shit, the Gojo charm almost had you forgiving him!
“No!” You snapped, stomping down your foot like the mature adult you were. “Shut up! I’m mad at you.”
Turning to head further down the row, you gasped as Satoru jumped over the row, landing right in front of you. “Look, just give me a chan—“ he started before you threw a handful of popcorn in his face, “okay, and here I thought I was the immature one.” His tongue darted out, licking at the salty butter off the corner of his mouth.
“You are! Toru, seriously! I put all that time and effort into planning that for you!!” You threw another piece directly at his forehead. He allowed the abuse with the popcorn to continue. He was staring at you as you tossed another piece at him.
“Are you done now?” He asked as you hugged the bucket to your chest. “Awesome, cool.” He reached out, ruffling your hair. “I can’t make up for missing the date that I seriously appreciate you planning and paying for. I can, however, make the most out of the night I fucked up.”
“How do you plan on doing that?” You flung one more piece of popcorn at him. It hit infinity before he snatched the bucket from you, placing it in one of the empty chairs.
“You’ll see.” A childlike smile was plastered across his face as he ran down the stairs, grabbing two bags before running back up to you. “We might not be at the fanciest of restaurants.” Your heart soared as he held out a take-out bag from the restaurant where you had made reservations. “But dinner and the Titanic?” He learned by pressing his forehead against yours. “Sounds like a great fuckin’ date to me.”
Taking the bag out of Satoru’s hands, you sighed, your fingers grazing over his longer ones. He didn’t have to pick up dinner from the restaurant you planned to take him to. Satoru didn't even need to try to find you when he knew you were angry, yet here he was—trying to prove to you just how sorry he was. Those were some of the things you loved about him. Cocky, annoying, and charming in more ways than one.
With your free hand, you grab onto Satoru’s wrist, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Has anyone told you that you're a charming asshole?” Seeing your smile, Satoru let out a sigh of relief before intertwining your fingers.
“Nope, that one's new.”
“Don't push it.”
“Yes, ma’am!” He grabbed the popcorn bucket before following you back to the top row. The two of you cracked open the takeout containers, eating the delicious food while whispering as you watched the movie.
Halfway through the food and movie, you hummed, watching the infamous steamy car scene before you turned to Satoru, who yawned. “Hey, Toru.” he tilted his head, turning to look down at you. “Do you think we could recreate this scene?” He perked up. “In a veil?”
“Oh, holy fuck!” You yelled, hand gripping Satoru’s shoulder as you bounced up and down on his cock. “Fuck, oooh fuck!”
Your boyfriend's head was tilted back against the chair. Whines and whimpers escaped his pressed lips as you slammed yourself up and down as hard and as fast as you could. The tiny viel Satoru had put around the two of you was keeping you concealed, and the heat within the small space.
The thick, musky, almost sweet smell of sex was getting to you, making you hotter and hornier. Knowing the two of you were fucking in such an open space, without people knowing, God, it was so hot. You were going to fuck Toru’s brains out as both punishment for forgetting your date and for making it one you would never forget.
“Y/N, please,” Satoru cried out, “please fuck.”
“Please, what, Toru~?” You cooed, rocking yourself back and forth on his dick, making his jaw drop into a wide ‘O’. “Tell me what you want baby~”
“I wanna cum; I wanna cum in your pussy.” He begged, his hands groping and massaging your breasts. “Please, baby~?”
You giggle just before you can respond to the people entering the theater. The cleaning ushers, no doubt. Your body seized up, clamping down on Satoru’s cock, causing him to growl. Your hand flew up, covering his mouth as you listened to the staff talking. While they couldn’t see you, the thought of strangers walking around while you had sex, god, it made you wetter than wet.
Keeping your hand over Satoru’s mouth, you fucked yourself down on him like he was your own personal dildo. His whines grew louder under your hand as he gripped your ass, helping you fuck yourself on him. He was so close, so, so close.
All he needed was a little push. That push is your twitching cunt. You rocked faster, your free hand resting over his chest, as you felt your orgasm coming in fast before your back arched. A silent scream etched your face as you came hard. Satoru gaped into your eyes, eyebrows furrowed together, as one hand gripped your ass and the other smacked into the veil.
Or rather, through it.
A bloody murder scream came from one of the workers as a disembodied hand popped out of thin air. The co-workers followed her out, screaming and yelling. At the same time, Satoru pulled his hand back inside the veil. The two of you were coming down, your bare chest resting against his. You just stared at each other for a long moment before you both started to giggle loudly.
“G-Guess the handprint scene doesn't work well in the veil.” Satoru chuckled, cupping strands of hair behind your ear.
“Guess not.” Was your confirmation, as you slowly pulled yourself off of Satoru’s lap with a wince. “Such a shame. I was hoping for better results.”
“Hmm, it might not work with the veil, but I have an idea where we could try because I’m not done yet. I still haven't apologized to you in the way you deserve.”
“Oh?” You both picked up your trash and readjusted your clothes as Satoru lowered the veil.
“Yeah, I wanna apologize to you in the shower, in our bed, fuck even the balcony.” The two of you ran for the exit door. “It's a good thing that the restaurant you picked out is known for the aphrodisiac desserts.”
“Wait, what?”
“Oooh, sweetie,” Satoru sneered down at you with a mischievous chuckle.“Why do you think I kept bugging you to take me to that restaurant?”
It was going to be a very long night for you.
Nanami Kento:
“Damn!” The soft curse woke you up; you rubbed your eyes, watching your fiancè searching for something on the dresser.
“Kento?” Your groggy voice drew his attention towards you. “Welcome home.”
Your beloved fiance had been gone for two weeks. He'd just gotten home last night; Gojo had picked him up for you. You had been working your ass off for the previous two weeks. You picked up the work of another co-worker who had just walked out without notice. Gojo knew you had been running around for two weeks filing paperwork, assigning missions, and helping Shoko. He was instant on you getting some sleep. He assured you he'd get Nanami, and you were thankful for him doing that for you.
This way, you could spend more time with Kento.
“Where are my cufflinks?” Nanako snapped, his eyes full of annoyance.
His tone had you blinking in stunned silence. “Right there,” you motioned to the box he always kept them in, “was your mission rough?” That would explain his cold, sharp tone.
“Yes, Y/N, it was rough.” He opened the box, grabbing the links before slamming it shut. “You wouldn't understand.”
His words sliced through you like a hot knife. “Excuse me?” You three the sheets off your body, standing to face him. “What the hell do you mean I wouldn't understand?!” Nanami Kento rolled his eyes at your anger.
“I'm simply stating the truth. You don't understand what it's like to go out on missions, fight, and do more than paperwork.” His hand ran through his still-damp hair. “So I'm just trying to understand why you couldn't pick me up last night. Gojo told me that you were burning the candle at both ends. I fail to see how that is even possible.”
The bedroom was nearly silent. The only sound that you could hear over the boiling rage was your heartbeat in your ears. “Get out of my way.” Was all you could manage as you pushed past him, digging through your drawers for clothes.
“Honestly, why are you acting like a child?”
“Why are you acting like a dick?!” Nanako was seconds from snapping back, but his words evaded him when he saw you crying. “You have no idea how hard my job is!” Your hands wiped uselessly at the stream of tears. “My worthless coworker quit. So I'm stuck doing my job and hers!”
“Y/N.”
“Yes! I do loads of paperwork, and I sit in front of a computer most of my day.” You pulled on your pants, stepping out of Nanami’s grasp. “It may not be physically demanding, but in a mental aspect, I'm drained. Paperwork, mission assignments, and death notices!” Honey-brown eyes went wide. “Yeah, that's why my coworker quit! She couldn't handle it!”
“Love, I—”
You held a hand up, silencing Nanami. “So last night, Gojo picked you up instead of me because I was in Kyoto. Telling a mother and father that their eighteen-year-old son died!” Flashes of Yu Haibara flashed through Nanami’s eyes.
He could barely handle his death, imagining what his parents went through. When someone in your position told them that their child was gone, he couldn't even begin to imagine what that must have been like. Emotionally and mentally draining. He had no idea how much your job consisted of because you hardly brought it up. More concerned with him.
“Y/N, I had no clue—”
“No, fuck you.” You turned on your heel, racing for the door. “Welcome home! Kindly go fuck yourself.” With those words, you left, leaving Nanami alone in your apartment.
It took you a couple of hours to cry out your feelings. The exhaustion and stress of the last two weeks hit you all at once with Nanami’s cruel words. He had no clue what you went through without him here. It didn't matter if he was just as exhausted as you were. Both of you had been ground to bones in two weeks apart.
Despite all of those factors, he still had no right to talk to you the way he had.
But as much as you wanted to stay away from him, your apartment, reality, you had to go back. Your engagement ring glimmered as a stupid reminder, even if he had crossed a line today. Nanami was still the love of your life.
The second you unlocked the door to the apartment, you sighed. “I'm home.” Your voice was barely audible.
Just as you finished removing your shoes, you looked up to see Nanami. His cheeks and neck flushed as he looked at the floor. Your fiance looked like a dog that had been scolded, as he should. Despite wanting to throw yourself into his arms and cry out your frustration, to hit, to beg him to hold you tight, you just walked past him.
Entering your living room, your heart lurched into your throat as you gasped. A large bouquet of roses is on your coffee table, surrounded by all your favorite snacks. The words ‘I’m Sorry’ were spelled in rose petals on the floor.
You had thought you were incapable of crying anymore, yet fresh tears spilled over your tear-stained cheeks. Nanami’s body looked over you, his hands hesitantly rubbing your shoulders. To Nanami’s relief, you didn't attempt to pull away.
“Y/N, I'm so, so, sorry.” you leaned back into his chest, sniffling as you wiped at your eyes. “The way that I acted this morning was utterly disgusting. I took my frustration and anger out on you, the last person I should ever hurt.” His fingers began kneading and rubbing at your sore muscles. “Could you ever find it in your heart to forgive me? For being an irrational ass?”
”A major ass.” Nanami’s whole body relaxed at your soft voice.
He turned you around to face him, his strong arms holding you flush against him. “Yes, a total and complete asshole.” Once your arms wrapped around his waist, he fully relaxed. ”Are you okay?” His smooth voice whispered, his chin resting on top of your head. “Do you want to talk about what happened?”
“No, I just want you.”
Pulling away to look up at him, he noticed the dark circles under your eyes. “Yeah? Do you need me to help you fall asleep?” His hand trailed down, gripping your hips. Your nod was the only confirmation he needed.
Sprawled out over the bed, candles burning, soft music playing, you gasped and whimpered. Nanami’s face was buried between your thighs, kissing and sucking at your drenched folds. Those honey-brown eyes that had been filled with concern and worry earlier were now drowning in lust. His needs could wait until later. This was all about you, making you feel better.
”Fuck Ken!” Your fingers grazed over his undercut before gripping the longer strands of hair. “Don’t stop, please, fuck.” Obeying your wishes, Kento’s tongue moved faster. Sucking and slurping at you. Quenching the thirst he had been craving for the last two weeks. “Yes, yes, yes!’
Feeling your cunt clenching, Kento shoved two fingers inside of you, his tongue focusing on your clit. You gasped, eyes wide as his two fingers rubbed expertly against your g-spot. You swore he nearly sent you to heaven as white spots flooded your vision. You screamed before squirting all over his face. The sensation, the taste of your cum had him rutting his hips into the mattress. His tongue did not once let up. It was your orgasm, the content sigh that left your lips that had him stiffening. His cock spurting cum all within the confines of his boxers and sweats.
Your dazy eyes trailed down over your nude body, focusing on Kento’s rutting form. Humping the mattress until the last waves of both of your orgasms came to an end. Kento hummed, his voice vibrated against your still trembling pussy. When he found the strength to pull away, You smiled as he trailed soft kisses up your thighs, hips, stomach, and chest before finally landing on your lips.
You kiss back softly, his arms pulling you close as he pulls you to lay on his chest. His hands gently caressed up and down your back, a slight frown gracing his face. “Ken,” you kiss his chest, “it’s fine. Please don’t worry about it anymore.” His eyes glanced at you before back at the ceiling, his fingers never once pausing.
“I know, I just, I didn’t know your job consisted of so much.” His eyes shut tight, eyebrows scrunching together. “You do all those reports, help Shoko, inform families of deaths, and on top of that, you take care of our home.”
His words from over, repeated over and over, on a loop. Just a desk job? You didn’t know what he went through. When it was the other way around, he didn’t know what you went through daily. His words were cold and cruel. All because he had taken his exhaustion and frustration out on you. The most important person in his life.
Your slender finger gently rubbed up and down the bridge of his nose. Grounding him, pulling him out of the deep void of his thoughts. Opening his eyes, he was met with your glimmering Y/E/C eyes. Your sleepy gaze and gentle smile had his heart clenching in his chest.
”Ken, it’s okay. You didn’t know, much like I don’t know about all of the struggles you go through.” Your gentle touch had him relaxing against the mattress. “Let’s just agree not to downplay each other again. We both work hard, every day, to make this life for us to share.” Slowly pulling your hand away, you leaned up, kissing his lips. “As long as we come home to each other at the end of the day, that’s all that matters.”
Kento smiled softly, pressing a gentle kiss against your lips. “I couldn’t agree with you more, Y/N.” Your warm, tired smile had him melting. “I’m home.”
“Welcome home, Kento.” You whispered against his lips.
Ryomen Sukuna:
You loved your boyfriend, really you did. But for the last week, he’d been almost insufferable. His younger brother Yuuji was on Spring break. His best friend Megumi had invited him to join him and his family for the week on the beach. Sukuna all but packed Yuuji’s bags for him, ushering the twerp out of the apartment before locking it up, heading to spend the week with you.
It was like his own personal spring break away from his brothers.
Which also was the start of a week from hell for you. At first, the weekend was lovely. The two of you stayed in, had crazy, animalistic sex, and just enjoyed each other. But when Monday rolled around and you left for work, things took a turn.
You came home to find Sukuna’s clothes all around the room, the dishes from breakfast still in the sink, and he was snoring on the couch. At first, you were upset. The poor guy was raising his young brother while their other brother, Choso, was on vacation with some college friends. Sukuna truly did bust his ass for his brothers, so it made sense that he was beat.
So you let it go, picked up, washed the dishes, and made the two of you dinner. It had been somewhat annoying, but it was alright. You wanted to make sure Sukuna got as much rest as he could before he went back to work the following week.
Tuesday afternoon, you came home to a similar situation: clothes everywhere, dishes in the sink, only Sukuna had just returned from the gym. When he got home, he started helping you before taking a shower. Maybe he had just been so interested in getting to the gym that he forgot to do the dishes. That sort of thing happened when you were in a rush, so it wasn’t that big of a deal.
But when you got home today, it was the same damn story. You looked around the apartment, groaning out loud as Sukuna scrolled briefly through Netflix. There were empty soda cans, trash, and, of course, his gym clothes all over the floor. This was not the man you knew.
“Ryomen Sukuna!” Your sharp tone had him turning in your direction. “What are you doing?”
“Trying to find something to watch on Netflix?” He raised an eyebrow as if it wasn’t obvious what he was doing.
“I can see that!” You scrubbed a hand over your face. “I meant all the trash, clothes, and everything!”
“Oooh,” he looked around the apartment, “I’ll get to it.”
You tugged at your hair with an exasperated groan. “That’s not the point! Why are you trashing the place to begin with?”
“I’m on vacation.”
“So?!” Your tone had his full attention now. “When I have a day off, I don’t trash your place.”
Sukuna pinched at the bridge of his nose with a grumble. “Are we seriously going to fight about this?” He narrowed his gaze at you, those eyes you normally adored full of irritation. Irritation that had no right to even be there!
“Yes, we are! How is it fair that I make us breakfast, go to work, come home, and make dinner? On top of that, you expect me to come home and pick up your trash and clothes?”
“Well, I mean, yeah.” The answer that came out of his mouth far faster than you thought. “I mean, that’s your job. It’s what you’re good at.” Sukuna rolled a shoulder as he twirled the remote between his fingers. “I exercise spirits, and you—“ He finally turned, seeing the rage and darkening of your cheeks. “You—are good at caring for the house and cooking.”
Oh, he’d fucked up.
You didn’t say a word. Instead, you scoffed and stormed to the bedroom, slamming the door. Sukuna winced and turned his head to face your room. Perhaps that wasn’t the best choice of words. He had meant to say, well, that you were a good caretaker, wifey material. Now that he was looking around the room, truly taking in the state of your usually well-kept home, your words were beginning to settle in his gut.
Had he been that lazy and messy? The take-out containers, his gym clothes, and empty cans confirmed that, yes, he had. Ever since his brothers left, he didn’t have to move constantly. He didn’t have to take Yuuji to school, helping Choso with homework. He had time to himself, where he didn’t have to ensure everything was in tip-top shapes. This was a chance for him to mellow out and relax.
He’d wanted to spend this mellow time with you, his girlfriend, the most amazing woman he’d ever met. But instead, he’d gotten lazy, stuck in a rut of not having to do such a damn thing. This wasn’t how he normally acted, so why now? Fuck, and to tell you you were nothing but a maid, that it was your job. Yeah, no, he totally fucked up.
You were his girlfriend, partner, and the woman he wanted to spend his life with. Most of his other partners hadn’t been able to handle the fact he was a single dad. He had raised his two brothers, just the three against the world. But you, god, you were an angel. You helped him out, making dinners and teaching him the best ways to cook and stir certain foods, which grocery stores had the best sales. You had made him a better man, a better brother.
And he’d gone and turned himself into a shitty boyfriend, trashing your apartment, making misogynistic comments, hurting you. He had to fix this. Or he might very well end up losing the best thing that’s ever happened to him. Without a second thought, he got up, executing his plan.
You needed an hour and a half to yourself before you had completely calmed down. You glanced at your reflection, whipping at your tear-stained cheeks before entering the living room. All you needed to do was grab something to eat and go back to bed. When you walked out into the messy living room, you stopped.
The trashed room scattered with clothes was completely picked up, and the coasters and books were neatly put back into place. Sukuna was nowhere to be found. So you headed into the kitchen, which was also spotless. No crumbs were on the counters, and the dishes had been cleaned and put away. There was still no sign of Sukuna.
Part of you was still angry and didn’t want to see him. The other part of you wanted to thank him and hear what he had to say. Just as you were pulling your phone out to call him, your door opened. Sukuna stepped in with a bag of takeout. He took his shoes off, placing them where they were supposed to go before he locked the door.
“Suku?” He jumped, startled by your voice. But he slowly turned to you, giving you a remorseful smile.
“Hey,” he put the takeout on the counter, “Y/N, I—“ his cheeks flushed as he rubbed at the back of his neck. “You know I’m not the best with apologies, and I suck at fucking using my words.” With a heavy sigh, he grabbed your hand. “But what I said earlier was fucked up, and I’m sorry. I don’t see you as some maid, I just.” You couldn’t help but smile as he struggled to find the right words. “I don’t want you ever to feel like I don’t appreciate everything you do. You’ve made me a better man, and I unfortunately haven’t been like that this week.”
You hummed, nodding in agreement as you interlaced your fingers with his. “Yeah, you’ve been a manchild. Yuuji would have been more mature than you.” He cringed, dropping his head down. “Then again, you did clean up your mess and pick me some dinner.” Your thumb brushed over his knuckles. “So maybe you haven’t been as bad as you think.” Sukuna was leaning in to kiss you, but you squeezed his hand tighter and tighter until it was almost painful. “But if you ever tell me it’s my job to take care of you or the chores again, I’ll put you in my trunk and help people look for you.”
Your boyfriend winced before nodding in understanding. “Right, yes, understood.” The second your hand softened, he pulled you towards the bedroom. “Come on.” You blushed, watching his back. His neck was a soft, rosy color.
“What are we doing?”
“You’re not doing anything.” He said, pushing you back against the bed. “I’m going to show you how much I appreciate you.”
Oh, and Sukuna did just that. He licked and sucked on your clit until you came. His fingers slammed in and out of you, fucking you until you squirted all over his hand. His smirk was sinister and hungry each time you came. Only when you were fucked out of your mind did he decide to fuck you with his cock.
“Please~ please, Suku~” You panted as he rubbed his cock head up and down your entrance. “Please.”
“Why are you begging?” He grunted as he slid his entire length into you. “You want my cock that bad.” He smirked at your tiny whimpers, his cock stretching you in the most delicious way.
“Yes, yes, I want it.” You grabbed his hand, and he went to hold it, only to watch as you placed it over your throat. “Give it to me.” You felt his cock throb inside of you.
He squeezed without having to be told twice. “Such a dirty slut I have.” He squeezed harder as he pulled out. “Here I’m trying to be romantic.” He slammed into you, the bed creaking under the force. “And my slutty little Y/N wants me to fuck her pussy like I normally do.” You whimpered, nodding in agreement. “Yeah, that’s the best way to show you how much you mean to me, right? Fuckin’ that tight cunt until you can’t walk. Making sure you’re ruined, only I can satisfy you and your needs.” He grabbed your thighs, pressing them to your chest, forcing you into a mating press.
“K-Kuna!” You cried out as he released your throat, his hands fisting the sheets.
“That’s right, scream my fuckin’ name.” He groaned, pressing a searing kiss against your swollen lips. “Scream it, let everyone know how much your boyfriend appreciates you, how good he fucks you.”
His words, the deep thrusts, and your already sensitive pussy clenched. “I-I’m so close.” You cried out, eyes locked on Sukuna’s.
His hips sped up, cock throbbing hard as he growled. “Go on then, cum for me again.” You screamed as he slammed harder and harder into you, sending you over the edge. Your screams were muffled by Sukuna’s growls as he kissed you desperately, fucking you through your orgasm right into his own.
He stilled, lips pressing harder against you as his hit cum filled you. Your soft whines of pleasure had Sukuna’s hips moving slowly until he was sure your pussy was done milking him. Pulling back, Sukuna panted, smirking at the blissed-out look in your eyes—a look he always wanted to see.
“Love you, Suku.” You breathed out, leaning up and kissing him. He didn’t say anything for a long moment. But his large hand cupped your face.
“And I love you and everything you do for me.” Without another word, his lips were on yours, his hips slowly rutting against yours. He intended to make you know just how much you meant to him. Even if that meant you’d have to call out of work tomorrow.
#jjk smut#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk men#jjk reader insert#jjk reader smut#jjk gojo smut#jjk nanami#jjk sukuna#jjk kento#jjk satoru#gojou satoru x y/n#nanmi kento smut#sukuna ryomen smut#reader x gojo#reader x nanami#reader x sukuna#jjk y/n#jjk gojo#jjk ryomen#jjk#gojo smut#nanami smut#sukuna x y/n#sukuna x you#sukuna smut#sukuna x reader smut#nanami x reader#nanami x reader smut#gojo x y/n
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SINCE YOU'VE BEEN LIKE THIS ♡
pairing: light yagami x fem!reader x l lawliet
summary: you and light have been a pair for as long as you can remember, but lately he's been pulling away. in your time of uncertainty, you end up getting close to l, maybe a little too close. now light's back to normal though, and you're left to figure out how you want to fix the mess you've made.
cw: nsfw (18+), smut, p in v, double penetration, fingering, handjob, threesome, voyeurism/exhibitionism, praise/degradation, infidelity, messy behavior in general, light angst here and there
wc: 19.6k
a/n: finally it is here <3 sorry for the delay, it has been a rough couple weeks. reblogs, comments, and asks are always appreciated <3 also i just have to put out there that my main in mario kart is waluigi till the day i perish 🙏
kinktober slot: day 27 - double penetration
"Light, can you slow down a little? Or at least tell me where we're going?" you called out to your boyfriend walking three paces ahead of you. Three paces he seemed hellbent on keeping between you and him.
He didn't answer your plea. Didn't even spare you a glance. On the contrary, you were pretty sure he sped up ever so slightly.
With a petulant huff, you tried to follow him along the crowded street as best you could. It was just difficult when you didn't really know why you were here or what you were supposed to be looking for. He never kept you well-informed when it came to his plans. Most of the time, you were shocked he even let you tag along at all.
His eyes constantly darted around between groups of people lining the path in the most subtle way. His head didn't move at all, but his pupils bounced around in every direction. Yours remained on his figure. At first, you'd tried glancing around too, but you couldn't figure out for the life of you who or what he was trying to find. You decided to just focus on not getting lost instead.
Bounding up closer to him, your fingers brushed his own. His hands had always been so smooth and soft. No calluses, no blemishes. No mileage at all. You went to intertwine your fingers together. That was when he finally acknowledged you.
He pulled his hand away.
You frowned, choosing to believe it was accidental. That your boyfriend wouldn't reject you so purposefully. You tried again with more intention, clasping with your whole palm rather than hooking pinkies.
His response matched your increased effort. He bent his arm at the elbow and pulled his hand out of your reach, fully removing the opportunity for physical contact. Then, he scowled at you, and his lips curled into that sneer you were becoming more familiar with these days.
"What are you doing? We're here to work," he said, talking to you the same way he talks to anyone else who inconveniences him, "This isn't a date. Try to focus."
"Light, I-" you went to defend yourself. But he cut you off before you got the chance.
"If you're not interested in helping, then stay out of my way," he directed before turning away.
Your lips closed up again, any words wilting away in your throat like a bouquet of old roses. You swallowed the petals down hard. You couldn't get emotional, let alone cry. If you did that, your lover would never let you hear the end of his disappointment.
Your lover. You didn't even know if it was accurate to call him that anymore. More like you were the lover, and he was your beloved. Your Light.
The two of you had been together in a way for as long as you could remember. Friends as children, crushes in your teens, and now as adults, officially boyfriend and girlfriend. You'd wanted this for so long - to say he belonged to you, that you were the ones who owned each other's hearts. But now that you had that, it didn't feel how you imagined it would.
You looked down as you traversed through the crowd.
The relationship between you and Light didn't feel like a fairy tale. It didn't resemble the romantic movies he used to tease you for liking. You could never imagine him kissing you in the rain or singing some love song or whatever else the guys in those movies did to win back the girls after hurting them.
When Light hurt you, either by brushing you off or saying words cold enough to freeze your pumping heart, he barely even said sorry. He'd give you the look, mutter a "I didn't mean it like that," and if you were lucky, half-hug you and kiss the crown of your head.
He hadn't always been so uncaring. A cloud had cast over him at some point during your teenage years, worse than any usual case of angst. His mental storm seemed to block out any rays of sunlight permanently. In recent months, it had gotten worse. Ever since the start of this investigation.
The two of you were supposed to be entering the primes of your lives. Enrolled in university, beginning everything together. But he just grew darker by the day, and you didn't know how to stop it. You could feel him dissolving into ash between your fingers. Slipping away while you desperately tried to hold onto whatever you could.
Barbs started to form in your throat and clearing it didn't help any. Reflecting on your crumbling relationship always reduced you to a state of silence or tears.
You counted the cracks in the street as you walked. It didn't matter to you if you lagged behind and got separated from Light at this point. He made it clear you weren't needed nor wanted. Getting lost wouldn't really mean anything. You could just make your way back to the task force earlier than you'd anticipated. He probably wouldn't even notice your absence.
A few steps ahead, you bumped into his back, earning another glare. He seemed to have come to a dead end in his search. Groaning in frustration, his eyes landed upon you, even harsher than before.
"Don't just stare at me!" he snapped, "Call back to the task force. Let them know we'll be returning soon."
The words struck you as if they were physical arrows. You turned away and pulled out your phone, flipping it open and dialing the number. The tone rang over the painful silence between you two. You tried to choke down any scratchiness your emotions could cause in your voice before someone answered the phone.
Suddenly, a calm voice echoed into your ear.
"Yes?"
L.
"Hi... me and Light will be back soon," you said. The less words you used, the less likely you were to crack.
There was a pause. You wondered if he could tell if something was wrong. You almost hoped that was the case.
"Alright. I take it you two didn't see our target?" he asked.
"No," you answered in the same quiet voice, "I'm sorry."
"Don't be. I didn't expect the two of you would be successful," he said. His voice was soft, like he truly didn't mind. The exact opposite of your boyfriend's. "We'll talk when the both of you return to the hotel."
He hung up first, and you flipped your phone shut seconds after. Turning to face Light, you found him already staring at you.
"He says he'll talk to us when we come back," you informed him.
All you got in response was a nod. He brushed past you in the direction of the hotel everyone was at for the day. Following along behind him, you didn't say anything. You folded your arms over your chest, not in defiance or anger. It felt defensive.
As you trailed him, the thoughts swirling through your mind consumed most of your attention. Why did you even continue doing this? You were just as much a member of the task force as Light, but he treated you like you were a secretary at best.
In the past, your father had worked with Mr. Yagami as a detective. You'd grown up in the world of suspects and investigations, taught to solve puzzles since you were old enough to keep yourself upright on your dad's lap at his desk.
L himself had approved you to work on the Kira investigation independent of that fact. He saw that you could keep up. But still, it felt like everyone treated you as Light's sidekick. You were cute! Smart for a girl. So sweet to dedicate all this time to helping your boyfriend.
By the time you reached the elevator, you were talking yourself up to quitting. You wanted to catch Kira. You believed in this job. But maybe if you cut your losses now, you could still salvage a relationship with Light. Or at least your perception of him. You wouldn't come to resent him if he wasn't yelling at you day in and day out.
You stayed behind him as the two of you walked down the hallway to the room. The lamps lining the walls flickered, making the already dim lighting worse. Your eyes stayed down on your shoes through the entryway and into the room. Light briefly caught up his dad on the day's events, and then you heard that same voice that talked to you over the phone.
You looked up. And suddenly, quitting didn't seem like such a perfect plan.
The syllables of your name rolled off his tongue like smooth billows of smoke. Something fluttered in your belly that you hadn't felt in a while. You used to feel it for Light until every time he spoke your name, it came out with disdain.
L talked, but you only half-registered the words. He was more focused on the points your boyfriend was firing at him anyway. You watched how his dark eyes focused as he absorbed everything about the conversation happening between them.
Your own gaze on him held nothing but admiration. You felt things about L that you wouldn't be able to articulate if asked. At first, you had the same reaction to him that everyone did. You thought he was strange. From the way he sat to his eating habits, you didn't understand him. But over the course of the investigation, you dedicated yourself to trying.
In a way, you looked to him as an aspiration. The pinnacle in the field of investigation. Quite possibly the smartest man in the world (though you'd bet Light would roll his eyes if he heard you say that out loud).
As you watched him now, his crooked posture and jaw rotating while he chewed on some saccharine treat, you began to mentally revise some of your earlier thoughts.
He was the only one who didn't view you as an extension of Light. When you were working with him, you weren't the feminine version of someone else. You were just you.
The only time you believed you deserved to be here just as much as Light was when you were sitting near L. You'd propose an idea or question something, and the way he would look at you made you feel like you weren't just a little kid everyone allowed to play dress up among adults. He'd give you a simple praise. "Nice work," or "Could be. Interesting." And you'd beam like you'd been given a trophy.
Right now though, even his proximity didn't help to brighten your mood. The clouds from your boyfriend snapping at you hadn't cleared just yet.
The conversation occurring in front of you came to a close. Light gave a quick goodbye and then turned to head out after his father. He clearly expected you to follow, but before you could, something else drew your focus. L, saying your name again.
"If you could, may I ask you to stay for a few moments?" he said, expression unchanging.
"What do you need to talk to her for?" Light interjected before you had the chance to answer.
Your head swiveled between the two of them. On one side was L, calm and unbothered by the clipped nature of your boyfriend's voice. On the other was the latter, his mouth twitching with the urge to scowl.
If you didn't know Light as well as you do, you might have thought this was a bout of jealousy. With the current state of things between you two, that might have even made you happy. A sign that he was still invested in you. But you did know him, so you knew that if anything, he was jealous of the fact that L had deemed information suitable for only you.
"It's nothing serious. Just a few questions about some files she brought to my attention last week," L further explained.
You stood there unmoving, as if you needed Light's permission to talk to your teammate. Looking back at him, you waited for some sign of approval.
He glanced at you and then back at the man behind you before shrugging.
"Fine. I'll see you later," he told you, barely saying goodbye as he exited.
The rest of the task force had also cleared the room for the day, leaving you and L in the cool hotel room alone. Your eyes glanced around to distract your mind from the awkwardness of the situation. The tacky pink wallpaper plastered all around you felt like it was closing in at the moment. The only sound between the four walls was the hum of the air conditioner. That was until he waved you over to the sitting area.
"Come here for a second. I wanted to talk to you." His voice sounded as though he didn't feel any of the tension you did.
You followed him as you had followed Light earlier, quiet and lagging behind a few steps. You took a seat on the ivory loveseat against the wall. He slid around the table. You expected him to sit in the chair at the end of the coffee table like he usually did, but instead, he landed next to you on the chiffon cushions. Your heart skipped a beat. You wondered if he was about to give you some sort of bad news. Maybe you'd made a mistake in your work. Maybe you were now a suspect too.
Regardless of what it was, he bent his legs up so his feet rested on the material. His normal crouching position put you at ease.
"Is something wrong?" he asked.
You blinked at the question. "Um... no?" you said.
He hummed in acknowledgement. His process of studying one's features was slightly less endearing when you were the target.
"You seem upset. Are you sure you're alright?" he tried again.
"Yeah," you nodded. Your eyes cast down to your lap. "I'm ok, really. I'm sorry if I seem a little off. Just not a great day, I guess."
"Did something happen earlier when you were out?" he said, seeing right through the excuses.
You looked up again, bringing him back into your field of vision. "Not really..." you opted for, though you knew you sounded unconvincing.
"Nothing out of the ordinary?"
"Definitely not out of the ordinary," you sighed before you could stop yourself. Realizing you probably shouldn't have said that, you sunk back against the stiff backing of the sofa.
"What does that mean?" he asked from beside you.
You weren't totally sure why he was going down this line of questioning, but you answered anyway. L had never given you a reason not to trust him.
"It's just stupid stuff. Between me and Light. Nothing you'd want me to bother you with," you shrugged.
"Try me," he said.
You looked at him tentatively.
"Both of you are key members on this task force," he continued, "If something is affecting your ability to work with other members of this team, then I think it's in my best interest to know about it."
A moment of further hesitation passed before you sighed. Your hand rose to your eyes, stretching your fingers over your brow and rubbing at your frustration.
"He just doesn't seem like himself lately," you said, "Or he does, I guess. But he just... he's different with me."
You found your legs pulling closer to your body and your feet perching at the edge of your seat too. Maybe sitting like this did help you think.
"Distant?" L asked from his side of the furniture.
"Sort of... it's like he wants to be distant, but we work together so he can't be. I don't know," you said. You cut yourself short because you could feel your throat beginning to tighten, and you refused to let yourself cry in front of your teammate whose respect you so badly crave.
"Well. The stress of this whole case is probably weighing on Light, especially with him being a suspect..." he said, trailing off in the way he tended to do.
"I guess. It just feels like he can't even stand the sight of me anymore," you said. Your voice cracked the tiniest bit, but you knew he heard it. A shaky breath left you, and you tilted your head back, as if gravity could keep your tears at bay. "Not that long after we started dating, things just got different between us. It's just... disappointing."
The man beside you nodded as if trying to contemplate what to say next. "Have you talked to him about this?"
"Light doesn't do talks like this," you said, barely louder than a whisper.
Another plume of silence rose between the two of you. You swallowed hard, neck still against the back of the couch. Vaguely, you felt the pressure of the seats shifting, the weight on it redistributing.
You took your hand away from your brow and turned your head to find L much closer. His wide eyes stared at you from less than a foot away.
"Someone who cares about you shouldn't be making you so upset," he mused.
To stop your lip from wobbling, you held it between your teeth for a moment. Even though nothing audible came from you, a small drop of water rolled from the outer corner of your eye. Without missing a beat, his thumb came up to wipe it away. If you weren't yearning for someone to care about how you felt, maybe you would have been confused by it. But right then, it felt good.
"He's just so mean now. He was always sharp before but now... he looks at me like he hates me," you whispered.
He seemed to be the one hesitating now. His eyes rested on your features.
"You're an intelligent girl. Light is smart too, of course, but he has no right to order you around or insult you," he said, "I hope you don't feel like you have to put up with that because you work together."
The others had noticed it too then. You hadn't given any specific instances of how he treated you, but he still knew.
"I know I don't have to. I just... I don't know how to be without him," you said, feeling pathetic. You shouldn't need this guy you've only known for such a short amount of time to tell you this stuff. But as he spoke to you with such tenderness, you found yourself wishing he did it more often.
"You know you're a pretty girl. You're sweet and thoughtful. I'm sure there's a lot of people who would feel lucky if you gave them the time of day," he said. The words came out slow, as though he was traversing a field of landmines. "I'm only saying that because staying with someone out of obligation rarely pans out."
You simply nodded in response. What he was saying was the truth. Part of you already knew it. The other part just didn't want to quit yet. It was as if Light was another puzzle, and if you could just put the pieces together right, the picture would form in the end. But the part of you that had already been thinking what you just heard, that was the part that wanted to squirm when you heard the words pretty girl fall from L's lips.
"I know it's not really my place to comment on your relationship," he continued as though he could read your mind, "I just don't want to see you quit this. You're a valuable member of this task force. I would hate to see you run off by petty drama."
You nodded, his words steeling your resolve. "I won't quit this," you confirmed. You wouldn't let Light ruin this for you, but more than that, L wanted you here. And you wanted to be here with him.
"Good," he said while staring back at you. He leaned away from your body and brought his legs down to the floor like he was about to stand. "I don't have anything else to discuss with you. The files thing was just an excuse for Light. You're free to-"
And before you knew what you were really doing, you pushed yourself across the loveseat and crashed your lips against his. To your shock and relief, he didn't push you away. You heard a muffled noise burst out against your mouth, but then you felt him sink into it too. His hand cupped your cheek, and he reciprocated.
A breath you'd been holding since joining this case seeped from your lungs. His lips were so soft, his palm just as delicate. You scooted a little closer to him, feeling the rigidness of his side against your leg. You couldn't remember the last time Light had kissed you like this.
And as that thought crossed your mind, guilt washed over you in a tidal wave.
You pulled back, eyes heavy with the weight of your actions and lips parted so hot puffs of air could flow in and out.
"I'm sorry," you said immediately, "I shouldn't have done that."
He stared back at you, completely motionless for the moment. You started to get up, but he reached out and grabbed your forearm, stopping you.
"Don't be sorry," was all he said at first.
The both of you were trapped here together, locked in the haze of feelings and morals clashing. You wanted to go back in so badly. You wanted to taste him, to feel every detail of his mouth long enough to commit to memory. By the way he was keeping you here, it seemed that he too had some of the same desires.
"I'm sorry because it was unprofessional, not because I don't want to," you clarified softly.
"It was," he agreed, not unhanding you, "I know you're right. It's not a good idea. We should be focused on the case. I shouldn't have involved myself to this degree at all."
The words came out like they're meant to convince himself rather than you.
"Just tell me," he continued, "Did you mean it, or was it a mistake because you're upset?"
"It wasn't a mistake. I meant it. But I can't," you said. But fuck, you wanted to.
He looked so pretty sitting there. His shaggy black hair hung in his eyes which were just as wide and uncertain as yours.
You knew that even though Light could be a huge dick, this was wrong. This wasn't justified, and you should not continue. What you should've done was get up and walk out the door.
But something held you there across from L.
"I understand," he said simply. He wasn't going to force you to do anything. If you strayed from Light, that would be your decision.
'Get up. Get up. Get up,' repeated in your head over and over. But you didn't follow your own mental advice.
"Did you want it? Or was it just the heat of the moment?" you asked softly.
You could see the indecision written all over his face. To make things more complicated with the truth or let them return to normal under the guise of a lie? The conversation lulled with the delay, but then his silken voice spoke the answer you'd been waiting for.
"I wanted it. I've been wanting it," he told you, "Everyday I see you, it gets harder to stand that I don't have you to myself."
And you knew you shouldn't, but now, you needed to. You pushed yourself forward and closed the gap. His thin arms encircled you to pull you toward him.
"Just this once, we can. Just for tonight, you can. Please," you whispered.
And who was he to deny you?
The problem with that night was that it hadn't turned out to be just once.
In the moment that you spoke those words, you meant them. You truly intended for it to be a one time thing. A small slice of pleasure you allowed yourself to indulge in. A secret that would weigh on your heart for the rest of your life. A brief lapse in judgment. A mistake.
But after the fact, what transpired between you and L felt like anything but.
One small kiss turned into several which whisked the two of you into a breathless makeout session on that loveseat. After a while, you'd crawled into his lap, and he'd slipped inside you. It was all a blur when you looked back on it now. A night of passion you'd never come close to experiencing before.
Quite honestly before that evening, you never imagined L to be capable of such romantic fervor. You imagined him as a much more distant lover. Similar to Light with the idea that his affection would be subtle. Different in that it wouldn't feel cold.
But for those hours, the word subtle hadn't crossed your mind once. Intense. Dedicated. All-consuming. Those seemed like more appropriate descriptors.
He'd been so good that you basically passed out next to him in the hotel bed afterwards. The two of you slept as if any of what had taken place was normal. Your limbs tangled with one another's while your dreams danced together overhead.
The next morning you came to slowly. You sat up and yawned, your hand lazily rubbing some of the sleep off your face. It took a few seconds of consciousness for panic to shoot through your body as you realized you needed to get up and go home.
Members of the task force would be there within the hour. You couldn't just be here before everyone else, wearing the same outfit as yesterday. It wouldn't take someone with Light's IQ to figure out what that meant.
You scrambled to put on your clothes and gather any belongings you'd need to make your re-arrival look fresh. L began to wake up from the sounds of your scuffling. He boosted himself up on the mattress and watched you for a moment. You'd never seen him so unfocused. It was beautiful in a way, his eyes lidded and tired, hazy with the remnants of a dream.
As quickly as you could without being rude, you explained what you were doing. To your pleasure, he didn't put up a fight. He helped you gather what you needed so you could go freshen up before coming back.
Before you left though, he brought you into a lingering kiss. He held your jaw tenderly and pulled away without any urgency, looking in your eyes while stroking your lip.
"I'll see you when you get back," he murmured.
And that was the beginning of many transgressions that shattered the illusion of 'just this once.'
You rushed home and hopped in the shower. The hot water washed away the rest of your drowsiness. The rising fog of steam enveloped you in warmth, bringing flashes of him back to your mind. How soft his dark locks had felt feathering against your neck. How tight his hands had gripped yours as he thrust into you. How sweet he'd sounded moaning in your ear.
Sighing, you leaned against the cool tile wall. You had to forget all that. It'd been nice, but it had to remain contained. Your work came first, and you would never hurt Light with the knowledge of any of that. It had happened and you didn't regret it. But it was over now.
At least that was what you told yourself.
On that day when you returned to the hotel in a new outfit, everything went as normal. There were no sly remarks from L. No tantalizing looks or teasing touches meant to operate under Light's nose. The both of you acted normal, went about your jobs and performed your duties as you're supposed to.
You weren't really sure what happened, but somewhere between then and now, your intentions to cut it off got muddled and faded away.
A few nights later, you had to stay late to review some aspects of the case with L. It started off professional but took no time to devolve. His fingers that had been so careful flipping through paperwork, eventually ended up beneath your skirt, toying with your clit as he had you continue to read off lines from the files before you.
After that, your entire relationship took on that tone. Your time together became filled with holding hands under the table, stolen kisses before others entered the room, and hushed moans as if one decibel too loud would result in you being found out.
But despite how good it all felt, you weren't heartless.
Every time you were alone with Light, the guilt crushed you. You began to act more like him, withdrawn and inattentive. If he noticed, he didn't complain, but that didn't alleviate your shame any.
You knew you had to end it with him. That was the only right way to go about this now.
And you planned to, you honestly did. You set a deadline in your head for when you would do it by. You stood in front of your mirror for nearly an hour, practicing what you were going to say. You imagined his reactions and tried to brace yourself in advance.
Every last detail was penciled into place. You even told L about it beforehand. As if it were another task for your job, he offered support. His reaction and the way he went about giving you subtle comfort helped you feel like this was the right decision.
In a way, you still loved Light. You probably always would hold a sliver of affection for him. The forever fondness that comes with being your first love. But you were becoming increasingly certain that you loved L too.
The day you planned to cut Light loose, you woke up extra early. The lining of your stomach felt as though it was webbed with live wires. Anxiety coursed through you with every beat of your heart. You got ready for the day like you always did and then went about your routine as normal. You'd meet up with him at the hotel, and then you could do it afterwards when the two of you were alone.
But that day that you had so meticulously planned didn't end with the two of you in some secluded alcove in the lobby. You didn't get to explain anything. He didn't get to yell at you for betraying him or tell you to never speak to him again. None of that happened because instead, that day he came into the room, he didn't leave with you. He didn't go home afterwards.
He offered himself up for confinement. He ended the day in a cell before you ever got to tell him anything.
You sat near L with your head resting on your hands, glaring at the monitor with the image of Light on it. He was looking back at the camera. Even though there was no way for him to have known your plan, you felt like his coppery eyes gleamed with mockery.
L watched your expression, taking in your dire look. Only the two of you occupied the room right now. Everyone else had gone home for the night. He reached across the desk to take your hand. His thumb swiped over your knuckles tenderly.
You glanced at him in return. "Do you really think he could be Kira?" you asked weakly.
The answer you wanted wasn't so much to do with the exact question you asked. No matter how L explained it or whatever evidence he laid out, you could never bring yourself to fully commit to the idea that your boyfriend was this prolific serial killer. Instead, all you really needed in this moment was some reassurance that this stint in confinement wasn't for no reason.
He met your eyes, pausing before he spoke to consider his words.
"Yes. There's a chance he could be, one I'm partial to believe," he said, "But even if he isn't, that will show in time."
You nodded, pouting without realizing it and turning back to the screen. He was looking ahead now, not staring into your soul through the computer screen. You still felt stuck though.
You couldn't launch into a relationship with L now because Light was gone. The others were already pretty up in arms about Light and Mr. Yagami being held. It was doubtful that seeing you and L use the time as an opportunity for your own benefit would lessen those feelings any.
But on the other hand, you figured it would be cruel and unusual to dump Light through the speaker that blasted into his cell.
You sighed and shook your head, casting your vision over to the screen that featured Misa Amane. Your eyes briefly scanned her features. She was pretty; though, it was hard to tell with the large shield they had her face covered in.
"Do you think she's the second Kira?" you asked with disinterest.
He nodded, much more invested in the stakes of these two pieces of the puzzle than you were at the moment.
"Yes. It's just a matter of getting her to admit it," he said.
You nodded again, inclined to agree with him on that. You didn't know Misa all that well, having only crossed paths with her once or twice. From what you could tell, she had a huge crush on your boyfriend. He didn't seem to reciprocate it necessarily, but he did act strange on the few occasions she came up in conversation.
At certain points, you wondered if he was cheating on you with her, but you figured that was your mind projecting.
"We'll figure it out, darling," L said from beside you, drawing you back to reality with his soft tone, "We just have to be patient."
You turned your head to look at him. Some of the tension in your neck and back eased up as you gazed into his eyes. The sight of him sitting there, scrunched up like usual, softened your pessimistic outlook ever so slightly. He made you believe that you could endure all of this simply because he was worth it.
Leaning over the armrest of your office chair, you pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. The images of Light and Misa glowed behind your heads as he furthered it, rolling your seat in his direction.
L had been right about one thing. The past couple months required intense patience.
Light's confinement stretched longer than you would have imagined. You predicted a month at most, and even then, you believed that was kind of a stretch. It shouldn't take that long to determine if he was Kira.
But the one month marker passed and it seemed there was still no end in sight.
You and L continued your affair, still in secret. It was odd having to hide when the main person you were shielding from your feelings sat in a cell under your surveillance twenty four hours a day.
Seeing him like that got to you some days. When he started begging and pleading to be set free, it killed you inside. You could barely stand to look at L when it happened. It felt like you were watching the version of Light you'd fallen in love with come back only to be put in agony. Your chest would ache as you watched the video feed, your lip between your teeth and your eyes brimming with a sheen of salty tears.
L understood as best he could. He had known when this all started that things with you wouldn't be so cut and dry. It still gnawed at him a bit to see you torn up, but he gave you space when you needed it and held you when you didn't.
Just as you were beginning to lose hope that this would ever end, the day came that L informed you he would be releasing Light.
A strange mixture of relief and dread flooded your mind. You hadn't gone this long without speaking to Light since the two of you met back when you were both missing your front teeth and taking notes in crayon. You'd be happy to see him free of course, and it was one step closer to untangling yourself from this twisted web you'd created. But the other part of you filled with uneasiness stemming from your guilt. That combined with the expectation that he wouldn't care one way or the other about being reunited with you.
But when the two of you met again in the new hotel, your predictions couldn't have been more wrong.
You reluctantly glanced up at him when you heard him enter the room. But it was when your eyes met that something felt different. Your racing thoughts came screeching to a halt, a head on collision of guilt and nostalgia.
He strode across the room, lacking the normal weight he seemed to constantly carry on his shoulders these days. You rose to your feet on impulse. His arms reached out, and you felt them wrapping around your body. He pulled you to his chest, holding you there as his nose brushed the crown of your head. He said your name against your scalp with more softness than you'd heard from him in months.
You returned the embrace. Your hands splayed across his back, feeling the lean muscles beneath his shirt. Before you knew what was happening, your eyes felt misty.
"I missed you," you choked out as a whisper, "I've missed you so much."
You'd been missing him longer than fifty days. The version of Light in your arms was the one you loved since you were old enough to really understand the concept. This was the one you thought you'd lost forever because of this investigation.
"I missed you too," he said in return. Even his voice sounded like it used to. He didn't speak with inherent disdain for your very being. The words came out with a soft lilt meant for a lover.
"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I didn't do more to help you," you whimpered. The apology was meant for more than the crime you confessed to.
"It's alright. There was nothing you could do," he said, his hand rubbing the expanse between your shoulder blades.
You ran your fingers up his neck and threaded them in his sandy locks. Pulling back a few inches, you kissed his cheek a couple times. You felt the skin flush red with embarrassment, which brought a smile to your lips. He didn't scowl or push you off. He got flustered.
"I missed you a lot. Don't leave me like that again," you whispered, pulling him back in for one more tight hug.
Your heart ached with the knowledge that you had planned to break up with him soon. You didn't think you could go through with it anymore. Not when he was himself again. Your Light.
The two of you pulled away from each other, and then your eyes landed on L sitting on the couch. Either he was much more understanding than you ever thought possible for a human being, or he had a phenomenal poker face. He looked completely unaffected, faring much better than you would be if the roles were reversed.
In contrast to his unbothered appearance, your stomach turned. You felt more guilt building in the pit of your belly, each brick being laid there reminding you of the fact that you were a horrible person. It was the only truth you would accept about this situation. You were a horrible person whose selfishness had created this mess. Truly, the solution you probably needed was swearing off men. You should devote yourself solely to finding Kira because you didn't deserve anyone. Certainly not the two people in this room with you.
The two of them began to speak, but you could barely hear the words coming out. Each of them sat on one end of the orangey, vintage couch while you took your seat in the chair on the opposite side of the pale rug beneath you. All your mind could focus on were the questions swirling within. How could you have done this? How could you have been so self-centered and stupid?
Neither of them deserved this. They didn't deserve to be caught in the carnage of your emotional state. You should've broken up with Light when you fell for L, plain and simple. That would have been the cleanest exit strategy possible here. Now there was no clean option left. Anything you did was going to leave animosity and tension in its wake.
You didn't zone back into the conversation until the words that had been popping out every so often started to piece together. The arrangement they were planning began becoming clear to you.
"You're going to handcuff yourselves together?" you asked with disbelief.
They both took a break from conversing with each other to look at you. L nodded while Light verbalized an explanation.
"If this gets us closer to catching Kira, it will be worth it."
"But come on, do you really think this is necessary? Wasn't almost two months in confinement enough to prove your innocence? All this will do is drive each of you crazy," you argued. The part you left unsaid was that it would drive you crazy as well.
"I believe it's necessary," L told you, "I also believe it will increase our efficiency."
He stared into your eyes, trying to convince you without words. If he was anyone else, you would believe this was intentional. A strike to get back at you for your loving reunion with Light. But you didn't think L would do that. He'd never taint the integrity of his case with personal feelings, and he'd never hurt you like that. He'd never hurt you like you hurt him.
Before you know it, a long, silver chain with two shiny cuffs attached had been pulled out. Each of your lovers got one locked around his wrist. You glanced between them, your eyes following the links that connected them.
You had a bad feeling this would require even more patience than the last couple months did.
Though it wasn't his intention, L couldn't help but feel that this handcuff idea had turned into a punishment for him. His consequence for sleeping with a girl in a relationship, and then continuing the affair and allowing himself to grow attached.
When he came up with the plan, he thought he could handle it. He had put up with watching you and Light together for months when he believed his feelings were unrequited. But now that he had his own taste of you, it felt nearly unbearable.
Living in the task force building with the two of you and watching you lavish all your affection on Light felt like torture. Every stroke of the other man's soft hair from your loving fingers felt like a blade slicing his skin. Each kiss to his pale temple was a bullet piercing his own flesh. Every time he had to hear you speak to Light in a sappy tone of voice or pay him a compliment, he'd rather rip his own ear drums out.
It was brutal. He didn't even get the reprieve of your nights alone together anymore. Your contact with him had been reduced to emotional looks, double-edged words, or soft touches on the rare occasions that Light fell asleep first.
Those nights were few and far in between. The last time it had happened had been weeks ago. All of three of you had been watching a movie, some horror flick none of you had seen. You sat on the couch together, like this was a hang out and not a date. On the right side, Light leaned back into the cushions. L took up the left side while you were in the middle between them.
Light had you tucked to his side as the movie played in front of you three. It was a possessive gesture and that was obvious to L. The movie wasn't scary and you weren't cold. The other man wanted his relationship with you on display. If L was going to sit in on your dates, at least he would know he was the third wheel.
He tried to act casual about it, tried keeping his eyes solely on the screen showing the carved up victims of the film's killer. But he couldn't stop himself from noticing how you played with Light's fingers. You shuffled them between your own, bending his digits and stroking the smooth skin. You fidgeted with them thoughtlessly like it was the most natural thing in the world. And he realized for both of you, it probably was. He'd never felt so out of place.
The urge to get away from it coursed through him with such intensity that he considered popping his thumb out of place just to slip out of the cuffs and get some space. The air in here felt suffocating, weighing down heavier on him every second. He ran his hand through his sleek hair. This night couldn't be over soon enough.
It was about two-thirds of the way through the movie that he felt your hand on his instead. You inched across the cushions and looped your fingers over his. He turned to look at you and saw Light's head slumped over onto your shoulder.
Unease swirled in your eyes. You seemed almost apologetic, and that was confirmed when you spoke, keeping your voice quiet enough not to wake your sleeping boyfriend.
"I'm sorry," you whispered.
He blinked at you. "For what?"
A little sigh puffed from between your lips. "For this," you said, "I'm sorry for dragging you into this and stringing you along and not just breaking things off one way or the other."
"I was hardly unwilling," he responded. His hand flipped over and returned the hold you had on him.
His words made you smile a little, but sorrow still riddled your features. "You know what I mean. I just... I don't wanna make you feel like I'm leading you on. I don't regret being with you. I still care about you. A lot," you said. The L word stayed on the tip of your tongue. You were too mixed up to expel it.
He shook his head. "Don't apologize," he commanded gently, "If I expected something easy, I wouldn't have let this go as far as it did. I'm just as much to blame."
"But still," you replied, unconvinced, "I know I should just end things or leave you alone. It's just that he finally seems to like me again, and I don't know. It's hard to throw that away."
Sadness pervaded your words, and he hated it. It made sense. The tangled knots between the three of you didn't leave much room to feel happy.
"If Light is what you need right now, then that's ok. You don't need to feel an obligation to me-"
"I don't!" you interjected, almost forgetting to keep your volume down, "I don't. It's not like that. I love Light, but you're important to me too. I don't feel like I owe you anything. I feel attached to you because you're special. You mean so much to me. You're not like anyone I've ever known."
You were killing him, truly. He didn't want to let you go, but he figured giving you a way out would be easier. You just wouldn't take it. He didn't really know what to say. It wasn't like he could just join you and Light... the other man would never go for that.
"I love you too," he whispered, saying the words you wanted to without mincing them, "But feeling so torn isn't good for you. And it's not fair to Light."
Internally, your heart soared from the soft declaration. It would've been one of the most romantic moments of your life if it wasn't for the fact that you had made it so messy. But you had, so all you could do was nod because you knew he was right.
"Figure out what exactly you want, what will make you happy, and what will be best for you," he finished.
He then leaned in and gave you the smallest, softest kiss you'd ever received. Despite its fleeting nature, it struck you like a truck crashing into your body. It was the first time you'd kissed him in weeks, a reminder of how good he felt.
You stared into his eyes once the two of you had separated, running the tip of your tongue over your upper lip. Your heart fluttered in your chest for him. Your breaths came in and out with a little more effort.
Then, interrupting the exchange between you two, Light snuck his other arm around your waist and pulled you closer to his body like you were a beloved stuffed animal. The sudden reminder of his presence nearly caused you to jump out of your skin.
You ripped your eyes away from L and settled back in next to your boyfriend. Cuddling him closer, one of your hands ran through his hair and ensured he didn't wake himself up by moving.
And just like that the moment was over. Things went back to how they had been every other second the three of you spent in this arrangement. But L had gotten his fill and it was enough to keep him going for a while more.
Over the next couple days, he watched the two of you more closely. Part of him did it for selfish reasons. He wanted to find more time he could have you to himself. More moments he could steal from Light. But there was another part of him that was purely curious. It was the part of him always looking for a logical solution.
Through his observations, it became increasingly obvious to him that Light wasn't happy about this handcuffing arrangement in regards to his time with you either. He just seemed able to tolerate it much better than L could. Probably because he was the one with the official claim on you. He didn't have to hide his feelings.
Light could openly sit with his arm around your shoulders or your ass parked on his lap. He was the one that could stroke your head or kiss your cheek. He got to call you 'sweetheart' and be the recipient of your bright smiles.
At first he didn't take advantage of any of those things too often, but lately, the detective had noticed an uptick in all of those behaviors. The others had caught onto it too and found his rejuvenated affection for you slightly odd, but they chalked it up to almost two months apart. Two months without any form of physical contact would drive anyone to feel needy. And L agreed with that for the most part, though like with everything else, he had some theories of his own.
He also believed that Light's increase in attentiveness towards you stemmed from jealousy beginning to fester inside him. Maybe jealousy wasn't exactly the right word, but his actions toward you weren't purely romantic. They felt like warnings sometimes, reminders that you belonged to him.
He didn't think you had told your boyfriend about your affair. It was doubtful that he would've just let that slide and carried on with things as if they were totally fine. And he didn't think he was catching on either. As much as it pained him, you had been so inconspicuous. If he was anyone but himself, he didn't think he would paint you as attracted to anyone other than Light.
There was only one real instance he could identify that would qualify as Light catching scent of the truth.
The three of you had been working on the case in the evening, sitting side by side at the table in the main room of HQ. Your bodies lined up in their normal arrangement, Light on one side, you in the middle, and L on the other.
Over the crown of your boyfriend's brown hair, sat the band on a pair of headphones. The audio of last week's news coverage droned in his ears. Meanwhile you worked on taking notes on dates of killings and potential patterns and connections between them. L was scribbling some points down about names of victims.
It had been small, and he'd barely noticed it. But when his eyes drifted to the left side of his page, he caught a little marking on the right edge of yours.
A small pair of dots with a curved line beneath stared up at him. The little smiley face gave him the look you couldn't, spoke the words he didn't hear from you anymore.
He ended up drawing his own tiny ":)" on his paper. It rested right next to yours, only separated by the thin space between the two sheets.
It only took you a minute or so to notice. He acted like he was focused on his work, but he subtly watched in his peripheral for the smile that spread across your lips.
Continuing the game, you brought your pen back to the sight of your doodle and drew a little tongue sticking out of the mouth. He laughed under his breath. Thoughts of adding onto his filled his brain, but before he could, the third person in the room interjected.
"Are you guys passing notes now?" Light asked before nudging the headphones off one of his ears, both visibly and audibly unamused.
Your head whipped to face him. "Sorry. I just got a little distracted," you explained. You leaned in and placated him with a kiss to his cheek. Then your attention returned to the task in front of you.
L continued to watch as the interaction played out. Before he could refocus his own intentions, he caught Light giving him a look. It was only for a few seconds, but the suspicion shot across the back of your shoulders directly into L's skull.
But as far as he knew, that had been it. Neither of you had talked about it in front of him, so unless you discussed it while he slept, Light must have just let it go.
So the only other option left that could explain this shift in his level of affection was natural possessiveness. Whether he was conscious of it or not, Light had to share you with someone else 24/7 now. The two of you were never alone anymore. Even if L stayed quiet, forgetting his presence entirely was not an easy task with the way he stared. Private conversations and truly intimate moments were a thing of the past in your shared life. He supposed that would grate on anyone.
He still wasn't decided on that line of reasoning though, so he filed it away with the rest of the ways Light had changed during his confinement. He could figure out the source later. For now, he just needed to focus on you.
Quite honestly, he couldn't believe he had let any of this happen. He found himself wishing that he stopped on that first night. That part of his mind yearned for some way to go back in time and tell you the kiss was unprofessional and leave the tension to fizzle out. Everything would be so much easier in the universe where that actually happened.
But then again, in that universe, that version of himself would never get to experience you, and he didn't envy that in the slightest. Even with all the drama and secrets and heartache, he didn't regret you at all. It was the mess he hated, not the person at the center of it. No matter how hopeless things between the two of you seemed, he found himself unable to let go. You could trample his heart as much as you wanted and drag it through countless fields of broken glass, but at the end of the day, he'd still be there waiting for you to pick him from the carnage.
He knew it was pathetic. Childish even, believing in some sort of modern fairytale with you. But being aware of those things didn't curtail his feelings any.
If anything, it made them worse. Not having you to himself like he did for the time Light was gone created a bitter taste in the back of his mouth. Acidic resentment ready to spew at any moment toward the man toting you around as his possession.
The worst it felt was when you two did try to have a private moment while he slept.
Normally, you spent the nights in your own room in the task force building, but on occasion, you'd fall asleep before you could retire to your own space. In those cases, you'd sleep pressed to Light's side on one of the two beds in his and L's shared bedroom.
That night when the jealousy burned so hot inside him it felt like it would bubble over, it was because he woke up to the sound of the chain rustling. It dangled across the space between the two twin mattresses, the links clanking against each other and the floor. The sounds weren't erratic but just noisy enough to pull him from the comforts of unconsciousness.
His mind stayed hazy at first, ready to be lured back under. But then he heard a soft moan. Light's voice tenderly bursting into the otherwise quiet space. Then came you shushing him.
"I'm only gonna keep going if you stay quiet," you whispered.
That brought L to his senses a little more. He had been facing away from the two of you, so he couldn't see what was going on exactly. He blinked away his sleepiness and tried to focus on deducing that though.
From there, he could hear the rhythmic strokes of your hand. The wet sound of you spitting onto your palm. Light's grunts as he presumably bit his lip and kept his face against your neck.
"You're so good at that," he choked out while gritting his teeth.
A quiet giggle trickled from your lips, and a part of L died inside. It felt kind of stupid. He knew you and Light were intimate. But knowing and bearing witness were two separate things.
"You still have to be quiet. If you wake him up, I'm never doing this for you again. If you get hard in the middle of the night, you'll have to rely on your own hand," you teased before connecting your lips with his.
L lied in bed as the rest of that played out. The delicate smooches and creaks of the bed. Light's strained whines and labored breaths.
Even after you'd finished him off and the two of you fell asleep again, he rested on the bed, moving as much as a stone. His eyes stared at the wall while his limbs felt like cement. Thoughts tangled up in his mind. The feelings of betrayal and envy and disgust and longing all muddled together.
Humiliating as it was, none of them killed his need for you. If you came to him tomorrow and informed him you and Light had split, he'd be as ready to embrace you as he was a few hours ago.
The desperate yearning for you was a disease, but as of now, it wasn't terminal. He could still function, could still even coexist with the subject of his hatred. That's what he was doing right now as the three of you played Mario Kart on the Wii hooked up to the tv in their shared room.
You and Light were curled up in the corner of the couch again while L sat a few feet away on the floor with his back against the structure. His shoulders tilted side to side as he maneuvered the controller in his hands.
Three of the small split screens showed your chosen characters weaving through Coconut Mall. You had a shitty race so far, lagging behind in fifth place. Light was up ahead in first with Toad while L trailed close behind in third as Dry Bones.
You already resigned to losing given that it was the third lap and you didn't have any good power ups. After winning the last cup, that was fine with you. One of them could have this one.
The two men on either side of you didn't share your nonchalance. Both were dead silent, completely focused on the tv screen. They zipped their cars through the virtual parking lot, dodging the mini obstacles in the way. Glancing over at his corner of the screen, you could see Light basically had it in the bag. But then L jammed his thumb down on one of the wiimote buttons.
A blue shell flew out of the little skeleton turtle's hand and zipped up ahead to Toad. It slammed down with all the pettiness L felt inside, and Dry Bones passed by, smug with success.
"Damn!" Light huffed, dropping the controller in his lap.
He glared at the screen as you finished up the race. You came in fourth place rather than fifth. The feeling of slight achievement wasn't long lived though. You could tell out of the corner of your eye that your boyfriend had just barely resisted the urge to fling the plastic remote towards the wall.
L turned his head to look up at the both of you. His gossamer lashes kissed his cheeks as he blinked a few times. You looked at him awkwardly, hoping he could say something to cut through the tension.
"You know, Light. If you used the mushroom in your inventory, you could've avoided the blue shell. There's a trick you can do with the timing, but also, you would've been over the finish line if you sped up so it wouldn't have mattered if it hit you anyw-"
Light's head snapped in his direction, his stare even more agitated than before. Your eyes flitted between them like a scolded puppy even though you weren't on the receiving end of the icy look. If there was one thing about Light you knew, it was that he hated being shown up. And even more, he loathed being corrected afterwards.
"What happened to you pretending like you're not even here?" he said with a tight jaw, "This is supposed to be time for me and my girlfriend. And last I checked, that isn't you."
L shrugged in response, not reciprocating the annoyance. "It was your girlfriend who asked me to play. Maybe you should have checked with her about that," he said coolly.
You cringed a little, hearing the subtle assertion in his voice. He said your girlfriend, but you could sense the challenge. The unspoken dare to Light to make that more apparent so he could prove otherwise. You really really didn't want that to happen though, so you interrupt the exchange with forced laughter.
"Guys, chill out. It's just Mario Kart. No need to get all upset," you said.
L took your advice and turned his eyes back towards the television. Coconut Mall was only the second track in the cup after all. There were two more to go.
You looked up at Light who was relaxing now too and sinking back into the plush cushions of the couch. He still hadn't picked up the blue wiimote in his lap, and you weren't confident he was going to in the next few seconds.
As a preemptive strike, you leaned in and kissed his cheek. "You don't have to play anymore if you don't want to, baby," you murmured.
Baby.
The word stabbed at L. He peered back at your shared corner of the couch.
"Don't be a sore loser, Light. You know you don't have to be good at everything," he taunted.
In an instant, your boyfriend's face morphed into his previous harsh expression. You grabbed the controller from his lap, preventing him from lobbing it at L before the thought to do so could form in his mind.
"I actually have a lot of other games. We could all just play something else. There's Wii Sports, Just Dance. I even have this one where you're like a detective, so maybe you guys would like that..." you chattered.
"Can we just watch a movie instead? Something that involves less input from him," Light responded with a pointed gaze in L's direction.
"Sure!" you chirped, all too eager for another distraction.
You hopped up from the sofa, nearly tripping over the chain that connected their wrists. Your feet got their balance though and narrowly avoided an embarrassing fall. Once stable, you headed over to the little binder of disks you'd brought to HQ when you all moved in here and rifled through it to find something that could please both men.
L chewed the inside of his cheek. He had nothing to really be irritated about in this moment, but this whole situation wore on him. As a result, he felt like being a little pushy.
"Your girlfriend was excited to play that game, wasn't she?" L asked, still keeping the facade of casualness, "We really have to stop because you're not winning?"
The way Light gritted his teeth was nearly audible. "She's the one who suggested we do something else," he defended, "If she still wanted to play, she would tell me. She doesn't need you speaking on her behalf."
"Yeah, really. It's no big deal. I can play later," you said, trying your best to smooth things out.
L's pupils lingered on you, assessing and judging. He knew you were trying to defuse the situation above all else. He understood the motivation, but that didn't mean he liked it. Why couldn't you let the fuse burn down to the blow up? The explosion that could set everything straight. Let it clear this mess and leave nothing but rubble that the two of you could rise from to be together.
As of now though, that was nothing more than a wild pipe dream. He let go of it. It was probably best for the case anyway.
You popped a DVD into the player before standing and prancing back to the sofa. Taking your seat, you slotted yourself right under Light's arm, pressed against his side. L scooted up onto the couch too but maintained the distance of a single cushion. It was weird sharing the space with the two of you, yet he figured it was better than staying on the floor and feeling like a kid being babysat by a negligent couple.
Only a few moments passed before the menu screen appeared. The cheesy looped music sounded for a couple seconds before you tapped the button to play your selection. It was some 90s movie. One that despite its star-studded cast, was still filled to the brim with atrocious acting.
All three of you were silent through the beginning even though none of you held much interest in the film. The plot panned out predictably; the characters fighting over petty qualms and falling in love at the drop of the hat while the end of the world decorated the background of their lives.
L let out a quiet sigh, a section of his dark tresses swaying with the force of his breath. The heel of his palm squished against his cheek while boredom swirled in his eyes and spread across his other features.
Meanwhile on your side of the couch, you remained relieved you'd avoided imminent catastrophe. Your head leaned against Light's shoulder while his fingers twirled absent-mindedly on your bicep. About forty-five minutes into the film, he turned and kissed your forehead.
You peeked up at him. The act would've been unusual for the Light you'd become accustomed to months ago, but for this updated version, it was fairly in line. You gave him a tiny smile and snuggled further into his side. Relaxation permeated the both of you as you sat there and watched the stupid movie in front of you. To you, it was the end of conflict. This acted as a time killer to fill the rest of the night before you could go to sleep.
But your boyfriend seemed to view the situation through a different lens.
His fingers continued to massage your upper arm in light ministrations. They were barely noticeable. So casual they almost felt inherent.
But that was only until they dragged upward to your neck and collar. The smooth pads of his fingertips trailed over the little bump of your clavicle. They dusted over you with the most gentle care you'd ever seen from the man holding you close. His digits traced with intention, with subtle desire. They delved downward and teased the top of your breasts, bringing heat creeping up from the pit of your belly into your cheeks.
Carefully, you readjusted your position, brushing him off in the most inadvertent way possible. In contrast to the way he pulled away from your hand all those months ago, this could truly appear to be accidental. It didn't matter though because it didn't deter him any.
His head ducked in, and he kissed the skin beneath your earlobe. He pulled you a little closer to his body, allowing you to feel the definition of his form. An involuntary shudder swept over you. You tried to fight it, but the provocative touches had an effect whether you wanted them to or not.
He moved his lips down, licking and nipping from your earlobe onto your throat. That was when you almost lost it, nearly letting a moan escape you. It would have been soft and quiet, but at any volume, it wasn't a sound you wanted getting out right now.
Your eyes fluttered. All his touches felt so good. Light knew your body. Even though he was a dick for most of the beginning of your relationship, he was still observant. He knew all the spots that made you melt. He knew the area below your pulse point caused you to squirm and whimper while grazing the divot in your hips made them buck as a chill overtook you.
He kept his kisses quiet. Not quiet enough for someone attempting to hide them, but to the point that he wasn't slobbering all over your neck.
Either way, L noticed what the two of you were up to. He felt jealousy taking root inside of him. Ugly, brutal, all-consuming envy. He hated it, didn't want it at all, but it still made itself known.
He kept his eyes locked on the screen. He could feel you two shifting around in your corner. He could hear your breath hitch like it did for him. He could see in his peripheral how Light held you, in the way he wished he could.
"Light, quit it," you whispered.
You really tried to keep this between you and him, but he kept going. One set of his fingers swept down over your curves and gripped the dip in your waist. They squeezed the soft flesh, keeping you close.
"Shhh," he hushed you before nipping at the sensitive skin of your throat, "Relax, baby. This is supposed to be a date, yeah?"
Suppressing a whimper in your throat, you nodded weakly. You decide to just let him mess around a little more. Maybe he could work out his frustration and then mellow out.
At first, you thought that worked. He eased his efforts, laying some tender pecks on your neck. His kisses hit your skin with alluring care. You felt lulled into a sense of security. Your body calmed itself and cooled the fires of arousal beginning to burn. But then his lips parted and his tongue snuck out, licking a stripe up your neck before his mouth engulfed the wet area.
Simultaneously, his hand coasted back up and landed on your breast. This time the touch wasn't teasing. He grabbed the mound of flesh with intention. He kneaded it with unmistakable desire. Heat blossomed between your legs like it would when the two of you were alone. But instead of sinking into that feeling and spreading your thighs for him, you squeaked and tried to sit up.
"Stop," you whined. You were still trying to keep quiet, but you had to raise your volume somewhat to be forceful.
You grabbed his hand on your chest and pushed it back down onto your stomach. Though all that did was give him the leverage to pull you onto his lap entirely. The chain connecting him to L rattled as your body scraped across it.
Finally, L turned his head and looked at the two of you straight on. He observed the way Light held you to his chest and continued ravishing your throat. His eyes scanned over the way you squirmed and tried shutting him down without making a scene. The thing that stood out the most though was Light's eyes staring back at him. They gleamed with self-satisfaction, smugness to a level that dared L to try something. The glow of the tv hit his copper irises in a way that made them look closer to a deep shade of red.
L swallowed hard, taking a few more moments to watch. He could see from your expression you were embarrassed but not entirely displeased with the affection. It felt like a swarm of insects tearing him apart from the inside, the knowledge you could still enjoy touches that came from someone else. He didn't think he had that ability anymore.
"She told you to stop," he cut in, bitterness dripping from each word.
Pulling his mouth away from your neck for a few moments, your boyfriend's attention zeroed in entirely on the other man in the room.
"And was she talking to you when she said it?" he asked pointedly.
A pause filled the gap in conversation after those words. Both men stared one another down, contemplating the next move in the verbal chess match. Light's arms remained firm around you. He didn't let you scoot back to the neutral position between the both of them.
"I thought you said we could do whatever we wanted in front of you. That we shouldn't pay you any mind. Act 'like you're not even here,'" Light continued.
"Maybe it's better that I am here if you don't know what the word 'stop' means," he fired back.
You finally found the courage to cut in after watching the two of them go back and forth.
"It's fine, Ryuzaki. We were just messing around. I'm sorry if we made you uncomfortable," you said, diplomatic as ever.
"It's not fine," he challenged you. For the first time ever, you saw L lose his cool. His eyes blazed with ire for both you and Light. He stood from the couch, maintaining his glare. "You never stand up to him and then wonder why he never changes!"
Your eyes widened at the outburst, but your expression quickly melted into that of an ashamed child. On the other hand, your boyfriend lost his sense of superiority and now just looked confused.
"What is he talking about?" he asked.
"I- It's not-" you started to stammer, but you're unsure of who to even address, let alone what to say.
L could see you were struggling. A small part of him felt some guilt for lashing out, but the whole of him knew he needed to. This game between the three of you had grown tiresome. All he did to help was stay quiet and give you the room to collect your thoughts.
Light didn't offer that courtesy though and spoke again. "What is he talking about? You wonder why I never change?" he echoed.
"It's not like that," you defended with urgency, "I don't wish you would change."
Disgust crept into L's eyes. Before, he'd always found your timidity endearing. It was like an extension of your intelligence. Modesty that you projected because you wrongfully believed you didn't fit in with everyone else.
Though this exposed the truth of that characteristic. It wasn't inherently precious or just some part of you that came from the desire not to hurt others.
Right now, it was cowardice.
"Maybe not anymore. His confinement must have changed you too," L said.
His words hollowed out your insides, leaving the cavern of your chest bare, spare the remaining shards of your heart. The room around you felt like a sinking ship. Everything you knew would soon be lost underwater.
"I haven't changed," you said, your initial defensiveness fizzling out, "You don't understand."
"My confinement?" Light repeated, ignoring your words to the other man, "Did something happen between you two while I was locked up?"
It was hard to keep up when accusations were flying at you from both sides.
"No! Just let me explain," you denied, "When you were gone, me and Ryuzaki got kind of close because there's no one else around here to really talk to, you know?"
"Talk," L choked out, "That's all we did, huh? Talk?"
"I didn't mean- I just... It's not-" you tried to continue. You could feel your throat closing up as your eyes began stinging with tears.
There was no way you were going to let yourself cry. Not when you knew you were so undisputedly in the wrong. It would probably just make this situation worse. The pain you caused wasn't hypothetical anymore, but there were still salvageable pieces of the shattered whole.
You took a deep breath before scooting off of Light's lap. His arms had long gone limp around your waist. Sitting between them on the sofa, you stared down at your thighs for a few moments. When you finally felt some semblance of courage, you brought your head back up.
Both of them were watching you in anticipation. L still had broken hearts gleaming in his eyes while angry confusion dominated Light's features.
"While you were in confinement, Ryuzaki and I..." you started softly. Even though trailing off left your crimes unspoken, you knew the implication was obvious to Light. You forced yourself to continue anyways, needing to take responsibility. "It started a little before that actually. We got close. And we did a lot more than talk."
You sucked in a shaky breath, conjuring the will to expel the next set of words.
"I was unfaithful. And I'm so sorry."
Your head hung in shame. The room fell silent, spare for the quiet dialogue coming from the characters on the television.
"You... you cheated?" Light finally sputtered, "You cheated on me?"
Turning your head, you looked at him before nodding. "I'm so sorry, Light. I know it sounds like a cliche, but I never meant to hurt either of you."
The words came out like a broken record as your eyes watered to the point of overflow. With stiff fingers, you brushed away the stray tear.
"Why?" he asked, his tone settling into anger.
"I felt alone. And you were so distant. And I didn't know how to talk to you. But I didn't even try," you explained. It felt cheap to try and provide an excuse.
"How the hell am I distant? We're with each other every single day!" he snapped.
"Yeah, but before... you were different before. You were so mean all the time!" you responded.
He didn't have anything to say back to that because part of him knew it was true. And as shitty as it felt trying to justify yourself, he still had never offered up a reason as to why that was. He left you to wonder what you had done even now that he acted like he actually wanted to be in a relationship with you.
"It just started as advice. That was it, I swear. He just offered to help me because he saw how I was feeling. Then it became something more, and I was wrong for letting it while we were still together. But then you went away and I couldn't do anything about it and we just got even closer. And I'm just so sorry," you whispered, "I don't expect you to forgive me."
L shifted back and forth on his feet before lowering himself onto the sofa again. He still said nothing. He just observed, waiting to see what Light would say next.
"Do you still... have feelings for him?" he asked, "Do you still love me?"
"Yeah, I still love you," you said and looked back up at him, "I know I did a shitty job of showing it, but I never wanted to lose you. I... I couldn't just let you go. We've always been each other's."
He diverted his focus when you whispered out your words of endearment for him. "You didn't answer both questions," he muttered.
Sighing, you paused. You mentally tried to decide how to answer. Speaking as if only you and Light were in the room would hurt L, but addressing him rather than your boyfriend probably wouldn't bode well for you either.
"What do you guys want me to say?" you whispered.
"Tell the truth. Be honest. Say what it is you want," L finally joined in.
"Say it instead of just taking it," Light added.
Even though their directions were clear, it still took a few moments to find the words you wanted to use.
"I want both of you," you answered, "I don't want to pick. I don't want to hurt either of you any more than I already have."
The room stayed quiet after your declaration. You could feel the weight of Light's stare, but L simply seemed resigned. Reaching out on both sides of yourself, you took their hands.
You wrapped your fingers around their palms. Your digits could feel the subtle differences in each appendage. Both were smooth and slender, though L's knuckles protruded more than Light's. Luckily, neither one of them made the move to pull away.
"I know it's stupid and childish and selfish, and you can call me all that stuff. Just please don't leave," you begged softly.
The lone tear from before was no longer a stray. More followed its path and trailed down the smooth curves of your cheeks.
After a few moments, you felt L's thumb begin to swipe back and forth over your knuckles. Always the more lenient of the two, he was already caving a little bit to the sight of you weeping.
"I can't leave," Light grumbled and raised his hand, reminding you of the binds that kept him here.
He wasn't as swayed by your display of emotion. His jaw remained clenched with his eyes set in a harsh glare. You could hear the process of his thoughts piecing together in his head, you just couldn't decipher what exactly they were.
"So what?" he said when he finally spoke again, "I'm not good enough for you anymore. I have to share you with him?"
"No. You are good enough for me. That's not why," you reassured. Squeezing his hand, you continued, "You don't have to share. If you want to dump me, I would understand. I just... I can't just pretend me and Ryuzaki never happened."
Blinking at you, he took in each word and let it float through his mind. He mostly understood your point despite the murderous anger flowing through him in that moment. And on top of that, the small piece of him that knew the smart thing would be to break up with you was dominated by the larger part of his psyche that refused to let L win.
If he broke up with you, there was no doubt in his mind that L would accept you with ease. Why should he get to have that? Why should Light be the one who ended up alone in this situation? You were his first, and you still wanted him. You'd strayed for a moment, but your heart still belonged to him. He was sure that in time he could erase any remnants of your infidelity. He just had to be patient.
"What does Ryuzaki think?" he asked before looking at the other man, "He's been so quiet. Does he think we should have you choose? Does he want you all to himself?"
L returned his stare past you. "I said what I think. I want her to have what she wants," he replied.
"Don't give me that," Light sneered, "This isn't a case. There's nothing you have to put together before coming up with a conclusion. Do you still want her? Do you still want her even if she can't make up her mind and thinks she deserves you and me?"
You cringed at the wording of his questions but decided not to interject. Instead, you waited for L's response.
"Yes. I still want her. Even under those circumstances," he admitted.
The revelation made Light both smug and bitter. Knowing someone else coveted what was his felt good, but realizing that same person had some success obtaining it ate away at him. He wouldn't make that apparent though.
"I just think it would be easier if we worked on solving the case first," you added, "If I pick one way or the other, someone will end up hurt and that would only cut into our chances of catching Kira."
"So what do you suggest we do instead then?" Light asked, "Do we all pretend like everything is normal? That neither of us feel anything for you, and you don't feel for us?"
"No, Light-" you tried to defend, but he kept going.
"Or is it that you really want us to share? You wanna sleep between us at night? Want us both to tell you how proud we are when you do something good? Want both of our attention focused on you?" he mocked.
"No, I just think we should talk about it," you offered. You felt your cheeks starting to burn.
"Talk about what? What plan did you have in mind?" he carried on, grabbing your jaw and making you look into his eyes.
"I don't know..." you acquiesced.
From your other side, L hardened his gaze a bit. "She already apologized and offered to come up with a solution, Light. Don't just try making her feel worse," he warned.
"I'm not. I'm just trying to get some clarity on the situation," he said, "I just want to know what she means."
You didn't have an answer for him because in all honesty, you didn't really know what you meant. This wasn't a daydream. It wasn't realistic to expect both men to just magically forgive your betrayals. This wasn't a fantasy world in which their love for you would overpower all other negatives. But you didn't want to contend with a reality that wasn't that way, so you remained silent.
That didn't deter Light from coming after you some more though.
"Just say what you were thinking," he encouraged, "Is it that you want both of us to call you baby and pretty girl and all those other sweet names I know you like? Or maybe it's less innocent. Do you have a thing for two guys at once that you never told me about?"
The warmth of embarrassment flooded your face in full force. You could barely think with the hot air swirling around inside your skull.
"No, Light-" you asserted. But again, he keeps going.
"No? Maybe you like being watched then? I know you love almost being caught. But do you want someone actually watching you?" he taunted.
"Light, this isn't doing anything to-" L tried to intervene on your behalf. But your boyfriend didn't want to hear it.
"Do you wanna show Ryuzaki how you like to be touched? Or is it that you wanna show me what I'm missing out on now?" he asked.
"That's not why!" you said and yanked your hand away.
He laughed in response. He had no problem continuing to stare you down either.
"Maybe not entirely, but I know you. I know there's a small part of you that gets off on being caught." he accused.
And that was true. Having known you for so long, he knew what revved your engine. You'd told him all your dirty little secrets and darkest desires. Now that he was openly using them against you, you weren't sure how to refute him.
"Yeah, but this is more..." you said.
"I know it is, but you don't want it to be more right now, do you? That was your point. That we should save deeper discussion until after the case."
You nodded, hoping he would maybe ease up now.
But his grin only grew more severe. He mimicked your nod.
"Alright. I think I could come around to accept that idea," he told you, "I just need some more convincing. Maybe you and Ryuzaki could persuade me."
You eyed him nervously, wondering what exactly it was he planned on as methods of temptation. Turning your head, you found that L was just as lost as you.
"How?" you asked.
"Show me. Show me what I missed out on when I was off proving my innocence. Show me what you can't just throw away. Show me what was worth risking everything for," he commanded.
Your lips parted as the thunder of your heart pounding boomed through your ears. His request was pretty obvious, but you just couldn't believe it. It didn't sound like anything Light would have ever asked for. But then again, he probably would have marked cheating down as something you'd never do.
You moved your eyes to L in an attempt to gauge his reaction. He seemed just as stunned and uncertain as you though.
"C'mon. Don't act all shy now. I doubt you two had any problems when you were doing it behind my back," Light said.
"Light," you pleaded, your lip jutting out a bit.
"What?" he asked, colder than before.
"Are you sure you want us to... do that?" you checked.
"You're only going to hurt yourself more," L added.
"I don't need you speaking on my wellbeing," he said to the other man before redirecting to you, "I'm sure. I want to see what I'll be getting out of sharing you. So go ahead. I'm sure you've been missing him since I came back."
A pit formed in your stomach. Your vision shifted from one guy to the other. It was true that you'd missed L a lot as of late, but this was not how you'd envisioned your reunion at all. You didn't want to lose either of them though, and if this is how you went about that, then so be it.
"You want me to..."
"Kiss him," he directed.
A spasm overtook your heart, but you suppressed it with a deep breath. You then turned to L. He was right there, seemingly waiting for you to take that step. With one last look at Light, you refocused completely on him.
You scooted a little closer to his side of the couch and started to lean in.
"Are you sure?" he murmured before your arrival.
You only nodded in response before pressing your lips to his.
Your eyes fluttered shut and then so did his. You melted into the exchange with no real issue. You hadn't really kissed L in what felt like forever. Even under the awkward circumstances, you wouldn't let a chance to have him like this slip through your fingers.
He cupped one of your cheeks with his hand, the other slid around your waist. His lips moved in tandem with yours. In no time, your mouths found a perfect rhythm to share. He guided you into his lap now, situating you between his thighs.
Your quiet moan spilled into the air. You ran your hands up his chest, fingers caressing his lean figure through his clothing. His hand on your back squeezed your flesh and pulled you closer.
"She has a spot on her back that makes her go crazy," Light offered from the sidelines.
"I know," L said back before locking you into another kiss.
You glanced over at Light with shyness clouding your eyes. He had leaned back into the corner of the couch and openly watched you make out with L. His legs were spread while his arms draped over the backing and arm rest.
Butterflies erupted in a constant stream in your belly. Being observed by one while being kissed by the other felt like nothing you'd ever experienced before.
If L minded as much as you, he didn't show it. He kept himself focused entirely on kissing you. His tongue traced the seam of your lips before sliding into your mouth and dancing with your own. The hand that had been massaging your back moved to grope your hips.
You whimpered for him before leaning into his body more. He took your eagerness for him in stride and cradled you in the perfect position to make out.
For a while, it felt just like before. Like it was just you and him. You wrapped your arms over his shoulders and reciprocated his movements like it was the most natural thing in the world.
After a while of kissing, his right set of fingers trailed down your body. They delved beneath the waistband of your sweatpants, finding their place between your thighs. Over your panties, they stroked your cunt. The sudden burst of stimulation made you gasp against his lips.
With another little whine, you parted your legs a few inches for him. His digits took advantage and worked with more skill to stroke your clit and tease your slit.
"Is this how it started?" Light asked, reminding you of his presence again.
Reluctantly, you pulled away from L and turned to look at him. With droopy eyes and puffy lips, you tried to register the question.
"Kinda," you mumbled.
Even though you were talking, L didn't stop petting your pussy. He only seemed more dedicated to the task. He hooked his chin over your shoulder and laid some kisses along your jawline.
More little noises of pleasure seeped out of you, but Light continued with his questions.
"Kind of? Did you just kiss the first time? Or did you let him touch you like this too? Maybe even more?" Light mocked.
"I didn't-" you started to defend, but L nipped at your throat, making you stutter. You whined before continuing, "It was just different."
"I'm sure," Light mocked.
You wanted to argue more, but L tugged the damp cloth of your underwear aside and slotted his fingers against your folds. He swirled them around your little bundle of nerves as his mouth worked on your neck. You arched your back, pressing your ass against his thigh.
"No more lying," he whispered near your ear, "Be honest about how good I make you feel."
Your eyes fluttered at the command while his fingertips continued toying with the most sensitive part of you. They rubbed a little more before sliding down and dipping into your entrance.
"It feels so good," you whimpered, sinking further into his embrace.
"That's right," he purred.
His fingers worked into your dripping hole with ease. He pumped two in and out, stroking your inner walls as they scissored inside you.
From the other end of the sofa, Light watched the outline of L's hand move beneath your pants. He studied the way your head fell back and how your shoulders relaxed. It was like being able to watch your shared intimate moments from another perspective. Anger and betrayal still brewed inside him, but they were becoming less volatile with every little squeak you made.
"I missed feeling this perfect pussy. So soft and wet for me," L whispered. He nosed at your neck for a moment before licking up to your earlobe.
You shuddered in response. "I missed you more," you breathed.
Your hips bucked against his wrist when his fingers curled within and brushed up against a sweet spot. You mewled without any regard for volume. The sensations he brought you were your only concern.
Light bit the inside of his bottom lip. His breathing became a little heavier. He had never been with anyone but you. And you'd never been with anyone but him until L. Seeing someone else explore you like this made him feel something he couldn't articulate.
While watching, he imagined a few months ago when your relationship wasn't in the best place. He envisioned the days his words left you with tears in your eyes and a broken heart thumping between your ribs. Those were the days that brought you to L. He tried picturing it now, you after work, finding comfort in the other man. Finding refuge from the one who was supposed to love you more than anyone in this world.
But Light did love you. Even after all of this, he was sure of it. And more than that, he still believed he was the best person for you. He'd known you forever after all. Longer than anyone else in his life or yours besides parents. When he looked at you these days, sometimes he still saw the girl who used to write her initials on the tips of his sneakers during recess. You'd get the same look in your eyes working on the case now that you used to get filling out study guides in school. When you laughed, it rang out the same, and when you cried, your lip quivered like it did the time you skinned your knee on the way to his house.
He couldn't forget any of that even if this did hurt him worse than anything else he'd ever felt before, and he wouldn't let this thing with L take you away from him. He'd just have to hold out until you all caught Kira, and the two of you could move on.
The only thing he felt a little alarmed by right now was that holding out didn't seem like such a chore any more. Despite his pain, he couldn't deny the way his cock was filling out in his pants as he watched you get felt up and pleasured by someone else.
"My turn," he mumbled as he forced himself to return to his senses, "I want a turn with her before we share."
You blinked yourself back to reality as you felt his voice wedging between you and L. The man who'd been kneading your breasts while fingering you reluctantly pulled his digits out of your cunt and then removed his hand from your sweatpants. He gave you a few more gentle pecks to your throat before giving you a nudge back to your boyfriend.
Crawling towards Light, you didn't make it all the way there before his arms came out and dragged you close. His lips crashed against yours in an instant. Your noses bumped and his hands squeezed you tight. Despite the haste of it all, you had no problem matching his movements. You knew Light's body as well as you knew your own.
Your hand slid up into his hair, giving it a soft tug in the way you knew he liked. He moaned against your lips and kissed harder. Everything he was doing felt familiar, just at an increased volume.
"You're still mine," he whispered against your lips before making out with you in full again. He didn't give you a chance to respond before his mouth was back on yours.
You whined into the kisses, sinking into the cushions below you as he laid you out across them. His lips worked down over your neck in a similar pattern to L. He worked on marking the side of your throat the other man hadn't touched while his hands roamed your torso.
Squirming a little beneath him, your head tilted back against the couch, and you found yourself looking up at L. When your eyes met, his hand came out and stroked your cheek. He swiped his thumb back and forth over the curve of it.
"Can't have you forgetting about me," Light muttered between pecks to your neck.
"I didn't," you breathed. You wrapped your legs around his waist and tightened them.
He hummed in acknowledgement before rolling his hips against you, allowing you to feel his bulge grind between your thighs.
"Since you want us both, I'm gonna let you have us both," he whispered.
You turned your head and kissed along his cheek and temple. It didn't feel right saying 'thank you' to something like that, so you could only hope your touches would fill their place.
"Go sit in his lap. With your back against his chest," he commanded.
He then pulled off of you and allowed you to get up. Slowly, you rose off of your back and scooted in L's direction. He was ready to take you into his arms again. He positioned himself against the armrest of the couch and sat you on his lap like Light wanted. You could feel his stiff length poking against your ass as you did.
Once you were in place, Light leaned forward again and hooked his index fingers over the waistband of your pants. He pulled them down with your panties, leaving you exposed on top of L.
"Spread your legs, baby. I wanna see if you're ready," he said softly.
You obeyed and opened your thighs for him. L's hands dipped in and stroked the smooth skin on your inner legs, causing your cheeks to fill with heat again. Even though both men had seen you naked and felt every part of your body before, both of them doing it together was different.
Light's eyes trailed down your figure before landing on your center. They stared at the wetness gathered there, trying to judge if you could take them.
"Who knew you were so greedy? Almost soaked through your panties at the thought of two cocks at the same time," he mocked.
"At the same time?" you repeated. You knew you asked to be shared, but you didn't think he'd take it so literally.
"Mhm. You want us both, don't you? How else did you think this would work?" he smirked.
"I don't know. I thought you guys would like take turns or be on different sides or something..." you explained.
"No. If you want both, you're gonna really take both," he responded.
Shaking his head, he stood up and pulled his shirt off. L did the same behind you, letting it fall to the flood next to the couch. From there, Light unbuttoned his pants and let them crumple to the floor. He didn't show any awkwardness about revealing his body in front of another guy.
"Do you want your shirt off?" L asked, kissing the space behind your ear.
You nodded, and the both of you peeled it off your upper body before discarding it with his.
Light palmed himself over his boxers before sliding those down as well and letting his dick spring free. He gave his shaft a few lazy strokes while gazing at you. Below your body, L worked on pushing his jeans off and freeing himself from the confines of his pants.
"Think I'll let Ryuzaki have you first, and then I'll slide in too. I wanna see if you take him like you take me," he said.
L's dark eyes stared up at the other man. He didn't want to take orders from him, but then again, he couldn't really complain about the sentiment.
"Are you good with that?" Light asked, cocking his head while looking down at the man behind you.
"Why wouldn't I be?" he responded.
His arm wrapped around your waist, reaching down between your legs to rub at your clit a few more times.
"Are you ready, sweetheart?" he murmured to you in a much softer tone.
With nervous eyes, you nodded. You pressed your lips to his for a few more soft kisses. While you were occupied, he took the chance to adjust his position and line himself up between your legs. You felt the swollen head brush your entrance. The tip slid up through your folds, feeling your wetness before dragging back down.
Your heart pounded in your chest. This was really going to happen.
And then it did. He boosted his hips the slightest bit and popped it in. You whined as your walls fluttered, embracing his familiar length with ease.
He grunted and pushed forward. Slowly, his shaft entered you, sliding forward until he bottomed out. You let your head fall back onto his shoulder where you could nuzzle into his neck. His hands swept up over your curves and kneaded your malleable flesh.
Light watched from the same position, stroking himself as he watched someone else have you in a way he thought would forever only be for him.
"Does that feel good?" he breathed, "Does he know how to do it right? Just how you like it?"
A soft whimper puffed from your lips before you gave him a shy nod. L did know all the things you liked by now. He knew the perfect angle to rock his hips at and what speed you preferred. He knew how to make your mind melt out your ears by suckling on your pulse point. He knew all the dirty things to whisper in your ear that made you tighten up on him like a vise.
Light continued to observe. His eyes scanned over how L's hips began pumping into you. How his hands cradled your legs behind the knees. He listened for every wet squelch his cock brought out of you. Every hitched breath and whiny crack in your voice.
His length throbbed at the sight. It was the most fucked-up, perverse sense of pleasure he'd ever felt. It made him sick with lust. His hands trembled with the urge to reach out and interrupt, but he made himself wait.
He let L have a little more time with you. The other man sighed, nestling his face in the crook of your neck as he enjoyed the hot, tight euphoria wrapped around his cock.
Your eyes had fluttered shut after a few good nudges to your sweet spot. You lay against his chest, held up by his arms, totally pliable. Though even in your hazy state, you could feel Light's eyes bearing down on you, examining your every move.
But despite feeling his presence, it still sent a shockwave through you when he brushed the tip of his cock against your clit.
Your back arched off of the man beneath you as a sharp whine burst from your mouth. Smearing his sticky precum over your pulsing bud, he dragged the flushed end of his length back and forth. He moved at a slower pace than L. His movements only intended to tease you, not cause any true pleasure.
"L-Light," you moaned. You squirmed your hips, trying to entice him into giving you more.
His lips curled into a small smirk. "Hold still, babe," he chided, "I know patience isn't your strong suit, but you can wait a little more."
Whining again, you gyrated your hips a few more times. L groaned at the added stimulation; the motions worked your walls around him just right. He rutted up into you with more force, which only drew more noises from you.
Light took a deep breath, working himself up. He reached forward and grabbed your calves with precise fingers. His touch was gentle but calculated like it always was. Even in what was supposed to be the heat of passion, he made sure things played out according to his plans.
One of his hands dropped to guide his cock down to your entrance. A quiet moan escaped him as L's shaft brushed his sensitive ridge. He shuddered, but he didn't back away. He pushed with more intention and watched as you started to split open around him too.
A gasp tore through you. Your pussy burned as it struggled to take both of them. You writhed desperately, trying to find a position of reprieve. L came to a stop inside you and adjusted to hold onto your hips to keep you in place.
"Shhh, you're doing so good," he cooed while his digits rubbed small circles into your skin, "You can take it."
Light's jaw clenched as he ground his teeth. His breaths became more labored as he worked himself in all the way. It was so fucking tight. The feeling of L's dick pressed up against his own was also something he'd never felt before, but something he found himself really really liking.
"You wanted us to share," he grunted, "This is how it feels."
After a few moments, you started to settle again. Four sets of fingers coasted across your body, leaving little chills in their wake. The stretch between your thighs still stung, but pleasure began overriding it as L started moving again.
He thrust a few times, letting you get used to the sensation again. Then Light worked his hips back and forth. Your toes curled, and your breaths puffed out with broken whines in between.
Both of them found a rhythm that worked in tandem with the other. Grunts, groans, and sighs echoed all around you. Every inch of your body was in contact with one of them. Your head spun from the total overstimulation along with the ecstasy burning in the pit of your belly.
"Fuck... so much... feels like so much..." you babbled.
"Yeah? A little whore like you was made for it though," Light mocked.
Your eyes rolled back and you gushed around him. The words shot through with flaring sparks of bliss. In the past, Light could get a little bold with you sometimes, but never like that. He could see the effect his tone had on you, but he didn't make any move to lessen it. He only fucked into you harder.
"You're so pretty," L added from behind your ear, "You're being such a good girl for us."
With Light now holding your legs, he moved his hands to toy with your breasts again. He pinches and tweaks your nipples, getting you to recreate those cute little squirms from before.
"So fucking needy," Light taunted, "Can't even hold still."
"It's not my fault," you pouted.
L chuckled and kissed your ear, continuing to play with the tender nubs on your chest.
"It's alright, sweetheart. Feels good when you move like that," he soothed.
Another whiny sound of need flowed from your lips before you melted back against the man behind you. Coherent thoughts could no longer form in your head. Not when you felt so full. So fucking stretched to the limit.
Light could see you fading. He pumped himself in harder, his balls swinging and brushing against the base of L's cock. His rich eyes watched the man below you. He took in his slight changes in expression when you clamped around them. He noted how his eyes softened when you let out a little squeak.
After a few moments of his staring, L finally looked up at Light. He could tell he had something to say from the intensity in his gaze
"I thought you said we were friends," Light grunted, "Do friends fuck their friend's girlfriend behind his back?"
"I didn't lie. If I didn't consider you my friend, I wouldn't have hesitated to take her all for myself," L answered, calm in spite of the situation.
Your boyfriend's glare hardened, but a fire burned within him. He wasn't sure what it was. The carelessness? The challenge? He couldn't pinpoint it, yet something about what L said worked him closer to the edge. He felt the coils of release constricting within him.
His focus shifted to you. He saw the way your head bobbled around as though you weren't even conscious. Reaching out, he grabbed your face. Your cheeks squished under the pressure of his fingertips, and your glossy eyes opened again.
"Sluts don't get to pass out, baby. Keep those pretty eyes open. Want you looking at me when you lose it," he said.
"Sorry..." you hummed as you came back to reality.
L's hands hadn't stopped groping at your tits. After Light finished talking, he swooped in with his gentler voice.
"Are you getting close? You gonna cum all over both of us?"
You mewled and nodded, harsh breaths leaving you. Seeing how eager you are, Light's hand released your jaw and found your cunt instead. His fingers roughly rubbed at your clit, ripping more cries out of you. He spit down onto your already soaked folds.
"Let go then," he directed, "Cum for us. Let's see you finish."
His commanding words struck you and spurred you onward towards the finish line. Your hips bucked as your body quivered with the need to explode.
You finally found release when both of them thrust in unison, striking the right spots to throw you over the edge. Your body rolled with the waves of pleasure crashing over you. You could feel their hands still on you. Their palms rubbed while their fingers caressed and teased you through it. Both of their breathing became stilted as you squeezed around them impossibly tight.
L was the first to let go and allow himself to ride out the high with you. He spilled himself inside you with a few jerks of his hips and a whine erupting from his mouth. Burying his face against your throat, his arms encircled you tight.
Light kept thrusting, working you both through it. He hit his own high as you both began to come down from yours. A strangled groan fell from his lips. He tilted his head back before leaning forward and collapsing into your chest. His hips rutted forward, pumping the last of his spend into you.
It was a little difficult with Light's added weight on top of you, but L managed to wriggle his hips and pull himself out. As soon as his length popped out, you felt the stinging subside almost instantly. A dull ache replaced it. You didn't imagine walking anywhere far for at least the next twenty-four hours. Their shared loads leaked from you, seeping out around your boyfriend's softening length.
L was the most lucid of the three of you. With care, he shifted his position and held you against his chest from the side. Light still lied with his head over your pounding heart. Eventually, he eased his cock out of you. He didn't worry about the mess right now. You all could clean up in a little bit.
He turned his head to look up at you. His eyes met yours, and for the first time since he found out, he looked more hurt than anything else. You studied the expression before stroking his cheek and planting a tender peck on his lips.
"I'm sorry," you whispered.
He didn't say anything back. Instead, he closed the centimeter gap again and kissed you once more. The few seconds your lips were connected could feel like none of this mess was real. When your skin was on his, it was just you and him.
Your fingers threaded into his soft hair as L's digits rubbed your back. He sighed at the gentle touch, allowing himself to enjoy it for a few moments before he rose and leaned back.
Rubbing a hand over his face, he looked at the two of you.
"So... you really want to try and just... do this? Until we find Kira?" he asked.
"If it's ok with you..." you replied. You half expected him to laugh in your face before walking out. But he doesn't do anything so bitter.
He nodded. Worse than anything else, you could see on his face he really did intend on trying. He was going to try his hardest at this for you.
You reached forward and took his hand, guiding him closer to you again. "We can figure it out as we go. And then when we're done, we can all decide what to do together," you offered. You glanced up at L to make sure he was ok with that too, but the quick nod he gave you told you he was.
"Alright," Light agreed.
As a seal, you gave them each a soft kiss before smiling a little. Once you began to settle back in and grabbed the remote to change what played on the tv, both men's eyes found each other's in a silent, temporary truce.
Then Light looked to you again.
"Maybe you'd wanna play that game again?" he suggested, trying not to seem too soft about it.
Your eyes lit up, and you straightened out a little. "That would be so fun. Maybe you guys will be more relaxed about it this time," you teased.
He rolled his eyes and shook his head but didn't protest too much.
"You could try out that thing I told you with the shell. Maybe you'll win this time around," L added to Light as you got up to fix your clothes and start up the game.
"Maybe. You can't finish first every time, you know," he responded.
They both settled back into the couch after readjusting their own clothing. The familiar music started up on the tv as you handed them both controllers. Even though the situation between the three of you wasn't completely resolved, for the first time in months, you didn't feel the weight of secrecy across your shoulders.
#divider by cafekitsune#light yagami x reader#light yagami smut#light yagami x you#l lawliet x reader#l lawliet x you#l lawliet smut#death note smut#death note x reader#death note x you#ch: l lawliet 💌#ch: light yagami 💌
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THE DOCTOR HEADCANNON — BEING HIS PLAYTHING.
harley sawyer ( the doctor ) x reader
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tags/warnings: sfw (15+), light gore, torture/impact, power imbalance, degradation, abusive behaviour, posessive behaviour, kidnapping i suppose
sawyer is a HUGE jerk to everyone, including to his own little precious plaything, you. of course, such a cold, dense body made out of metal wouldn't make sense if it had a heart, wouldn't it?
besides.. your timid reactions to his sick, little experiments were what piqued his interest in the first place. what a lovely sight it is to see a flesh roaming around his prison like a helpess, pathetic rat who lost its way home. whether you writhe, yelp, whine, sob, or scream.. it's all melody to his ears.
he loves purposefully letting you escape from his lair, making you think that there's still hope to escape his hellish prison. just as you thought you were free of his grasp, he'll pin you, his beloved trophy, down—his mechanical figure hovering over you, eyes daunting as it pierces towards your cowardly ones, squeezing your neck tightly with his iron first, making sure that you knew there's no use fighting someone much stronger than you are. oh, how he loves watching the glint of hope fading from your pupils—dulling them with fear instead. he'd purposefully taunt you, mocking you with his laugh as it echoes through the hallways, "you really thought you could escape me, hmm? what an interesting thing you are, little rat."
oh, how he loves turning every single thing into a game that he knew you'd lose from the very beginning. it's amusing to see how you'd react time to time, whether you try to fight back or whimper out of fear, he feasts on it nonetheless. he'll purposefully make you play hide and seek with him, taunt you with his creaking footsteps, then having his way with you once he got his fingers wrapped tightly around you—dragging you into his lair once again as your fights and cries means nothing to him. "don't try to fight, little rat. i know you're at least smart enough to understand why."
don't get him wrong, though. just because he's able to leave cuts and bruises all over your delicate skin doesn't mean any of those filthy creatures roaming outside has the right to leave a scratch on you, not even a single one. oh, how sawyer wouldn't even think twice to rip appart the limbs off those past experiments who still roams in the area, who dares to touch you without any permission. you're his plaything, and only his. no one else.
the doctor wants you to DEPEND on him, just like how yarnaby depends on him and obeys him like a God. he wants your pathetic self to see him as YOUR lifeline, as he purposefully brings the necessities you need such as food and medicines, his mechanical joints placing them gently next to you without saying anything. afterall, he needs his little lab rat on good condition to play with, no?
at times where he's not running any 'experiments' and 'games' on you, he always kept you inside of his lab—no contact is allowed without his permission. he'd occassionally let yarnaby roam around and get used up to your presence, but he won't let you or it get too attached to each other.
he barely speaks to you, his answers are either mockery or straight degradation. you never really ask him anything about his motives too, he never liked it when you were curious. "say, little rat, i'd be amused if you hadn't learn what happens to curious little rats who gets too nosy."
a little fun fact; the doctor can easily destroy you if he wanted to. he always lets you know through his grips—how he's controlling it steadilly, letting you know that if he puts just the littlest more effort into squeezing you, you'd have your bones crushed within seconds—and he makes sure that you always remember that at all times.
"now, little rat, go on and amuse me. let's see what else i can get out off you."
#harley sawyer#harley sawyer x reader#poppy playtime x reader#the doctor#poppy playtime#dr sawyer#the doctor x reader#dr harley#ppt4#poppy playtime chapter 4#ppt chapter 4#ppt 4#sawyer#Spotify
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The Finer Things in Death
Alastor x Soulmate!Female!Reader
Summary: An AU where your soulmate's first words to you are tattooed on your body in their handwriting.
Oh dear, where's your smile?
You knew those words by heart. Could recite them backwards, in your sleep even. Those damning words have been inscribed on the inside of your ankle for as long as you could remember, the elegant cursive strokes poking out of your shoe line.
In theory, somewhere, someone else was supposed to be sporting your own neat, boxy handwriting. You'd say you lucked out with yours. Some soul marks were less than pleasant, and others were downright embarrassing (imagine having the words move, asshole written on your stomach for the rest of your life. No thank you).
At least your soulmate was trying to cheer you up, right?
Yeah, but there was just one teeny, tiny problem.
Your soulmate was dead. Long dead actually.
Were they stillborn? Did their toddler self die in a house fire or something? Night after night you laid awake in your bed, pondering what the hell could have possibly happened to have altered the entire course of fate.
All you really knew was that your soul mark was a light gray (indicating a severed bond) instead of the usual inky black, and it had been since the day you were born. Everyone was in shock to see the faint words on your little ankle. After all, how could a soul mark exist if the other person wasn't even alive to speak those words into existence?
Simply put, you were a conundrum, and it had been some time since you had dedicated effort into figuring out why? You'd accepted it. Your soulmate was dead. Life went on.
Besides, you'd spent enough time grieving over someone you'd never met before.
Your lifestyle was not extravagant by any means, but it was comfortable. You had a steady income, lived on your own in an apartment in the city, and survived off of more than ramen bowls. Every day you would come home and read in your little fluffy alcove that you'd built yourself by your window, or pop open a bag of chips (and the occasional bottle of wine, if you were feeling fancy) while you watched the latest crime show releases from your couch.
Yes, so comfortable was your little routine, that you didn't notice the robbery happening in the convenience store you were browsing in, or the stray bullet coming for your head until it was too late. Your skull exploded in a world of pain, eyes rolling back as your body crumpled to the ground.
Dying was an interesting experience, to say the least. Your soul floated from your body, the final notes of music that blasted from your earphones fading into nothingness like the sound of a car driving away.
There was a brief moment where you were struck numb, hovering in the air as you stared down at your glassy eyed corpse, blood pooling alarmingly from the circular shaped hole in your head. You heard screams of the other customers behind you, but they were kind of muffled, like you were underwater.
It didn't last long though, because before you knew what was happening, you felt an almighty tug downwards, like an anchor had just chained itself to your stomach.
And that was how you ended up in hell. Fun. What were you here for? You had no idea. Maybe God got mad that your teenage self stole a few packs of gummy bears in high school. But a life of eternal damnation and suffering seemed a little harsh, didn't it?
Before you could contemplate the semantics of it though, something...strange happened. Your ankle, right where you'd tried countless times to forget your soul mark existed, was burning like a fucking brand.
You hissed sharply in pain, frantically pulling down your sock to assess the damage. Was the eternal punishment starting already or something? Shit, you had terrible pain tolerance.
But what you saw made you gasp. In fact, you could hardly believe your eyes.
Because in the place of your faded grey soul mark, the letters had been reinvigorated, darkened with a swift hand and—glowing they were glowing holy shit.
"Hah," you huffed in disbelief, shaking your head slowly. "So that was it, huh? I was destined to meet my shitty soulmate in hell this whole fucking time?" You punctuated the last words with a few angry kicks to an unassuming patch of weeds. What a cosmic joke at your existence.
But, like you always did in shitty situations, you gathered all of your raging emotions, stuffed them tightly in a box at the back of your mind, and cooled your head. Freaking out in this place would do you no good.
Turned out hell was pretty much like the world you'd left, except for the fact that you could kill someone on the street and nobody would bat an eye. Like all of the depraved aspects of humanity were on full display now in a somehow still functioning society.
You managed to snag a job at an old record store, the owner giving you one look before grunting and gesturing to the register—but not before lifting his jacket to show you the long assault riffle strapped across his chest. Yeesh, you got the message.
It wasn't a bad job by any means, especially considering where you were. Sure a little boring and monotonous, but you'd restock thousands of old albums if it meant staying away from the overlords.
Oh, yeah, another thing. Overlords were like the big shots around hell. Messing with them usually meant a death sentence, or worse, a contract.
And if there was anything at all that you picked up from all those nights of watching television, it was that you do not make deals with the devil. Really, elementary level shit. And you'd never actually seen Lucifer, mind you, but these demons were probably a close second, right?
Yeah, so really, you were just living a shittier variant of your life on earth it seemed. Repetitive, safe and comforting. You were even starting to like the scent of musty cardboard, as weird as that was.
And once again, all thoughts of your soulmate slipped your mind.
Until one day, when everything went to shit.
****
It started like this: with the sad sight of your empty fridge.
You groaned, dragging a tired hand down your face. Seriously? You thought you'd restocked already, damn it.
Your stomach growled achingly, and you sighed, wondering if you'd actually die again if you starved yourself. Begrudgingly, you decided that you didn't really want to chance it, throwing on the first set of clothes that you saw and slipping out of your dingy apartment to make a quick grocery run.
You generally hated leaving your apartment, and didn't do so except to retrieve bare necessities or walk across the block to go to work.
Why? Well, see exhibit A to your left: some poor, random demon screeching and running around on fire. See exhibit B to your right: a turf war between two rival gangs. And finally how could you forget, cannibal colony, slurping up intestines like bloody, chunky spaghetti. Disgusting.
The worst thing about hell wasn't the fact that you were in hell, it was the fact that the worst of the worst people were all cramped together like some fucked up refugee camp, and some people were significantly worse than others. Which sucked, for the poor unfortunate souls just trying to get by. Like you.
You sighed, ducking under a stray stream of bullets (you weren't falling for that shit twice) and side stepping pools of blood and guts. Just a regular Monday morning in hell. God damn it.
It seemed luck wasn't on your side though, because an ugly, dog-headed demon blocked your path, sneering down at you smugly. "Hey bitch, it's your lucky day. The big boss is hiring, and you fit the profile."
You clenched your grocery bags in a white-knuckled grip. Nobody would give a flying fuck if you were dragged off of the street in broad daylight. "Not interested."
"Oh it wasn't a suggestion," he chuckled darkly. You tensed as you were surrounded by at least four other demons. Shit, you knew you should have slept in.
"You like apples?" You nodded sharply at the demon in charge.
His face twisted in annoyance. "Why the fuck do y—"
You reached into your bag, before hurling a granny smith straight at his forehead. He yelped as it made contact, stumbling back as he shook his head in confusion. While everyone was still in shock from your weapon of choice, you shoved your way out of the circle, gunning it straight down the street because your second life did depend on it.
"Get her!" You heard a yell of absolute rage, making you shiver. Fuck, that did not sound promising. That apple must have really pissed him off.
Putting your limited aerobics to use, you ducked, dodged and lunged through the crowd like a pro. Your heart pounded wildly in your chest, air burning your lungs as you pumped your legs faster. But of course, your grocery bag ripped open, sending all of your food tumbling and you by extension, tripping and face planting in the dirt rather pathetically.
A meaty hand gripped a handful of your hair, yanking it up harshly. You cried out as he pulled, hands uselessly trying to smack his away, but his hold only tightened. A liquor-filled breath and cheap cologne invaded your senses, making you cough.
"Uppity bitch," he growled, giving your scalp a painful yank for good measure. "You actually thought you could get away? Maybe I should teach you a lesson, huh? Sample the goods."
You froze, every nerve in your body going cold. So far in your stay in hell, you'd managed to avoid the more depraved souls here. You kept your head down, didn't draw attention to yourself, and were mostly left alone. Looked like today, your luck had finally run out.
"Get the hell off of me!" You spat, twisting around vehemently, only for your head to snap to the side as you were harshly backhanded.
"Stop your fucking whining and stay still!" He snapped, narrowing his eyes.
You bared your teeth, snapping at him aggressively.
A round of mocking chuckles went around the group of your kidnappers, the one holding your hair giving you a wicked grin. "Shit, that was cute. Really—"
He didn't get to finish his sentence, because his head exploded. Literally exploded, blood and brain matter dripping from your face. His hand went slack, dropping you on your wobbling knees.
Everyone was silent for a second, staring at the bloody mess where the demon was standing two seconds prior.
And that was when you heard it. Static. Loud, crackling and ominous.
Your mouth went dry. Shit. Shitty shit shit. You knew what that meant. How could you not? The asshole broadcasted his killings all over hell like a fucking psychopath. And now, it was your turn to become hell's gory entertainment. Fan-fucking-tastic.
You stood frozen, breath stuck in your throat as dark, menacing tendrils slowly curled along the walls. A large, grinning shadow rounded the corner, before the culprit himself stalked into view, razor sharp teeth on display as he tilted his head. "Oh," his grin widened. "Am I interrupting?"
"N-No man," one of the braver demons stuttered, taking a step back. "You can have her—"
Splat.
You turned slowly to face the bloody wall, eyes wide in disbelief.
"How distasteful," the radio demon shook his head. "As if I'd participate in your brainless thuggery. No, no. Unlike you gentlemen, I have class. Truly," his eyes lit up like glowing radio dials, a dark shadowy mass rising behind him as his antlers branched out like a gnarled, rotten tree. "Did your mother never teach you any manners?"
Faster than you could blink, the demons around you were reduced to blood, cartilage and splintered bone. The overwhelming irony scent made you want to gag, but you didn't dare move a muscle, eyes fixated on the terrifying sight before you.
When the radio demon noticed your staring, his smile sharpened, antlers shrinking as he leisurely approached you. Oh no. Nononono.
You struggled to keep from hyperventilating, your body going into shock as he leaned into your personal space. Two bloody fingers pushed into your cheeks, forcing your mouth into a morbid, artificial smile. "Oh dear," he tutted in amusement. "Where's your smile?"
You jerked back violently, eyes wide as icy cold realization washed over you. Dread squeezed your lungs as you stared at the grinning, bloody figure of your soulmate in horror.
The radio demon. Psychopath and mass murderer.
Your soulmate.
What the FUCK.
"T-This," your voice shook. "This is not happening."
There was a sudden screech of radio static, before his own eyes widened. Shit. "What," he said sharply. "Did you just say?"
"A-Ah," you trembled, leaning back. Every single nerve in your body was alight, screaming at you to get the ever-loving fuck away from him. In what was probably the stupidest and most desperate plan of your life, you pointed over his shoulder fearfully. "Look! Another one!"
As soon as he turned his head, you bolted down the street.
****
You slammed your front door closed behind you, double—triple checking your lock before sliding down to the floor in a panting mess.
Immediately you grew paranoid. What the fuck were you thinking? A lock wouldn't keep the radio demon out. You needed fifty more locks and ten more doors. You needed to barricade yourself inside for the next month. You needed—
"Hello there!" An exuberant voice chirped.
You screamed, throwing the first thing you could grab in his direction. He caught the house slipper, inspecting it in amusement, before tossing it over his shoulder.
"My, did I scare you sweetheart? Apologies," he grinned smugly, relaxing in your recliner with a mug of coffee. Your favorite mug.
You blinked. What the fuck?
"What are you doing in my house?" You squeaked, fingers digging into your welcome mat.
"Oh dear, allow me to introduce myself," he set the mug down on your coffee table, leisurely rising from the couch and offering a hand. "I'm Alastor! A pleasure to be meeting you sweetheart, quite a pleasure."
You didn't take his hand, instead choosing to gape at him like a dead fish.
He retracted his hand, tilting his head with a shit-eating grin. Twirling his cane, he continued like there wasn't just an awkward and terrifying pause. "I hope you don't mind that I followed you! You see, I believe our conversation was cut a bit...short." His eyes glowed as unidentifiable symbols floated in the air around him.
As quickly as they appeared however, they disappeared like they were never there. Jesus Christ, this man was giving you emotional whiplash. "Anywho!" He perked up again, ever the charming grin on his face. "Enough about me! I've yet to catch your name, darling."
Fuck. You really didn't want to give him your name.
But before you could open your mouth, he leaned closer to you, grin widening ominously. "I hope you're not thinking of lying, my dear. I must say, I'm not very fond of that quality."
"Y-Y/n!" You said quickly, raising your hands to shield your face.
There was a slight pause, before a gentle touch swiped at your cheek, retracting after a moment. You peeked your eye open, only to become vaguely ill at the sight.
"You had a little something on your face," he chuckled in amusement, holding out a clump of brain matter. With a swift flick, it was magicked away.
"What do you want?" You whimpered, overwhelmed with the entire situation.
"Oh dear, is it really that strange for me to want to get to know my soulmate?" He tilted his head, leaning towards you uncomfortably close.
"Y-Yes, actually," you stuttered, trying to look anywhere but his prominent red eyes. "I thought you'd do something more along the lines of...killing and eating me." You shrunk back as his grin widened. "Please don't eat me."
"How morbid, I would never!" He waved it away, like the idea was preposterous. "My word! What awful rumors you've been hearing about me!"
"You frequent cannibal colony and I just saw you tear apart six demons like they were freshly baked bread," you stared at him incredulously. "What hasn't been spot on?"
He paused, before giving you a humoring chuckle. "Well it seems your impression of me needs correcting!" Before you knew what was happening, nimble fingers encircled your wrist, pulling it forward gently. He pressed warm lips to the back of your hand, before giving you a charming grin. "Enchanté, ma chère."
You blinked, breath stuck in your throat. "What—What does that mean?"
"Oh, don't you worry your pretty little head about it!" He gently set your hand down, before pinching your cheek condescendingly. "Well my dear, I'm afraid I have other responsibilities I must attend to!"
He stood up with a flourish, leaning on his microphone cane as he smirked at you. "Not to worry!" He snapped his fingers, and a slim, feminine shadow emerged from the ground. "Missy here will watch over you in my stead."
"What? No, I—"
"I'll be back before you know it!" He offered a chilling smile, before melting into a puddle of shadows.
You gaped at the spot where he once stood, trying to process what the actual fuck just happened. Your gaze slid over to the feminine looking shadow, still standing in the corner of your living room. She grinned at your attention, teeth sharpened.
You closed your eyes, head thumping back against your door in exhaustion.
"I'm so fucked."
****
Enchanté, ma chère : Charmed, my dear
#hazbin hotel#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor#alastor the radio demon#hazbin#radio demon#alastor x reader#alastor x y/n#alastor x you#alastor x oc#alastor x ofc#alastor x original female character#hell#hazbin alastor#alastor being a menace#alastor being alastor
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