#And he will roast the FUCK out of you
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the strength it must have taken for illario to not immediately go full 'lmao since when have you even had a kiss hello lucanis' sibling violence mode during the café talk. inspirational. rook and lucanis really were doing all that right in front of his salad huh
#lucanis is being SO cringe with that line right out there in public and I would die for him. it's just such a weird thing to say#tbf if anyone in the world is used to the insane things lucanis says and would go 'yes yes lucanis waxing poetic about coffee#in ways normal people reserve for trying to get in someone's pants (the roast won't fuck you lucanis)#we've all heard it' like it's all normal I suppose it would be illario. and also he's too busy with the 'shit fuck shit he's not dead#he's not dead of the family members 'supposed' to be dead we're at two definite failures out of two and woe me if the twain should meet#if that IS a demon in there it sure talks exactly in the same bizarre way only my cousin does#does that mean anything what the fuck do I do who do I kill about this' internal monologue I guess#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#illario dellamorte#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#rookanis#I mean he does very much say that to a non-romancing rook too which only makes it all the more delightfully odd#is it a very lucaniscore way of testing the waters. is it just how he always talks about coffee. many plausible approaches here#no one forced him to bring up kisses and 'you should try it' out of the blue like that is all I'm saying. he could have acted normal#(theoretically)#i feel there are reasons to read some stuff into it lol#lucanis when rye says he prefers tea: it's so over cautious overture I don't quite understand myself yet gently rebuffed#lucanis when rye takes him up on the 'so what should a first kiss be' theme: oh we're so back!!!! wait. what. what do I do now#what is this#it's kind of really sweet that rook answers with their own playfully florid beverage based barely hidden metaphor at the end too#matching freaks and having fun with it#as far as lucanis is concerned rye's only true flaws are 1) prefers tea to coffee (oh well. no one can be perfect. cross-cultural love#can conquer all even in this) and 2) weird taste in interior design (did we really HAVE to bring your 15 foot tall corpse statues#with us home rook. I can understand a tasteful skull here and there but this seems excessive. well if it makes you happy I guess)
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danmarch 🐉💎
#honkai star rail#dan heng#march 7th#danmarch#fanart#hsr#what else do i tag. i have no idea#anyway. im breaking my VERY LONG oc art streak to post my one(1) contribution to star rail#i care them very much#ive been playing this game so religiously and they have not left my team#tragic past(emo) vs tragic past(girly pop)#theres NO WAY with marchs very teenage girl mind that she does not have a crush on the hot cool mysterious yet caring dragon guy#who stays in the room right next to her#and the fact that he teases her so much........#the whole ass belabog quest he throws in little harmless march roasts every so often#he fucking CARE her#i bets shes like a filipino mom with that camera. every oppertunity (picture!!!!)#and dan heng gets dragged into it#he is honing his photography skills against his will#any nice place? shes like (lemme pose can you get a photo of me?)#dan heng just sighs#they bond over silently judging stelle rummaging through the garbage#cast each other that best friend glance as half her body is sticking out of a trash bin#i like to think you see them hanging out on the train together#with dan heng reading some obscure 8th century book on civilization pattern and development#and march is humming and putting stickers and aesthetic shit in her scrapbook#taping a piece of antimatter legion loot in the middle of a page#and with bubbly handwriting (we beat some bad guys today!!! <333 so fun!!)
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As a musician I will never not be obsessed with the plot of Turnabout Serenade. Like what do you mean a professional guitarist gets accused of murder by Some Guy and one of his bandmates backs it up because he's upset the dude couldn't play a fucking quarter-note triplet correctly. What do you mean he uses that as evidence he did the murder. WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE WAS RIGHT
#mel's musings#daryan crescend#apollo justice#klavier gavin#ace attorney#turnabout serenade#aa4 spoilers#klavier should have roasted him for that way more i think#i fully believe he KNEW daryan fucked up on guilty love and only made apollo mess with the mixing board#because he wanted to humiliate him by having an amateur point out his mistake#plot twist: it wasn't actually from the revolver kickback daryan just sucks at music. bro can't play basic rhythms smh#music nerd shit#turnabout serenade is a good case you guys are just mean
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did you know that Dean wakes up one morning and realizes he has a fucking bombshell of a wife/husband/spouse, a cozy (slightly rural) suburban house, and not one but three fucking daughters???? Did you know that he woke up one morning to toddler giggles and little kid bickering and baby babbling????? and your girls come charging in hushing their little giggles so they don't wake up mommy and daddy and so OBVIOUSLY he has to pretend to be asleep so he doesn't foil their plan. he focuses all his energy on keeping his face and body relaxed, keeping his breathing even. they're whispering and babbling and Dean peeks an eye open and looks at the love of his life and these three angels with their daddy's attitude and their mama's heart. they have your eyes and his smile. they're... the best parts of both of you, and there's something entirely new and beautiful in each of them too.
Bobby Dean is your oldest, and her 4th birthday is just around the corner. She's 3 and 3/4 right now, and won't let anyone forget it.
Your second is Jodi John, or JJ informally. She's fought her way half way through the terrible twos and is already getting a head start on the whole 3 going on 13 thing.
Mary Cass, or Cassie, is your youngest. She's just over a year old, and wants to do everything her big sisters do.
And Dean is looking at your little girls, and at you. He sees the way the morning sunlight dapples in through the window and illuminates their tangled hair and disney princess nightgowns. Your face is all puffy from sleep, and you still smell like the apple pie you made yesterday.
it's real, he realizes. that pipe dream that apple pie life.
you gave that to him. you did that. you turned his deepest, most unspoken desires into a reality like it was nothing. and every ounce of joy and love and peace he feels every moment of every day, he owes it all to you. You try to tell him on occasion when he gets all sentimental on you, he deserves it. he deserves every good thing he feels, and he's so great with the girls, he's a natural dad and you couldn't possibly dream of a better husband to do it with.
Because at his heart, Dean is a family man. He's your family man.
#drabbles#dean winchester#dean winchester drabbles#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester drabble#supernatural#supernatural x reader#supernatural drabble#supernatural drabbles#domestic dean#husband!dean#dad!dean#for the record your fourth girl (when she comes around) will be named Karen Samantha#Karrie Sam for short#and before you ask YES uncle Sammy is over half the time at least#more often than not really#one time uncle sammy tried to give Bobby Dean a piggy back ride and forgot how tall he was. almost bonked both their heads on the doorway.#now there's a “no piggybacks if you're over 6'1” house rule#bobby is alive and well too by the way and also is over all the time#JJ's first word was idjit#something grandpa bobby will NEVER live down ever#I should schedule this but I have the sniffles and I crave instant gratification#also let this man be happy#for fuck's sake#and yes yes yes uncle cas also occasionally makes appearances as often as he can#yk how when you have a cat you have to get used to random noises in the middle of the night#your kids have that but it's their dad's homoerotic best friend eating leftovers of your pot roast out of the fridge at 2am on a school nit#they think everything cas says and does is just the bees knees#they think he's so funny#one of your girls shows him a sun bleached plastic tricycle in the back yard among some other toys and he's like
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love neal and el they're both sexy young brunette things with charm and adventuresomeness to spare and what they've chosen to do with it is be obsessed to death with the world's most regular man
#they said oh my god his exciting home cooked pot roast. his medium hair color. his cheap beer. i cant not fuck him and love him forever#this dude lucked into BOTH plump heart-faced prettygirl who will do all of the flirting for you AND lanky hotman art thief at the same time#god knows he did not do that on purpose . he has a type and it's Visibly Out Of His League but luckily#they also have a type and it's PTA Father In Training Loves Dogs Loves To Cook Like A 1950s Housewife#white collar#q
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I love to hear what people say about Youtube Drama* but it's SO tacky when it gets so offbase that the posts people make start to be about completely off topic infighting within the Watcher fanbase
#but god it IS fun to read about this kind of thing#asterisk on the drama bc this is not like a Scandal per se#this was a business decision made On Purpose#it's not like when sniperwolf stalked a guy and posted a pic of his home to her fans#or when the guy from tryguys fucked one of his employees Who He Himself Hired while also monetizing his wife and kids on the channel#this is different bc it's like. on purpose.#I DIGRESS....#you guys should see some of it in the watcher tag it's crazy. people are pointing at randos just bc they're already annoyed#i'll give you the clifnotes version which is that i got to see one where somebody has decided that the Steven Hate is actually ppl#revealing that they simply have just been racist at him the whole time. fwiw the steven roasting is bc he's an out of touch Tesla Boy#and bc he brought a homophobic evangelical pastor on the channel#and cockily admitted to being friends w people who are homophobic and racist... his own words#like he has verbally admitted to maintaining friendships with racists so i don't think people are really thinking this one through#these were new to me I was down to roast him for being rich and boring alone#also this reasoning kind of falls apart bc Ryan is literally Right There and people love Ryan#sergle.txt
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If i re wrote red hood outlaws + arsenal n red would you want to see snippets of that or would you roast me on a pike?
#btw it would be a lot more roy and kori run this show jason is literally only here because they wont let him leave#dc fandom dont roast me on a pike for wishing outlaws was good omg they had so much potential together#mfs out here acting like you can own a person#bro people got so mad at me for liking jayroy but fucking come on#outlaws sucks?? okay so does every comic released by fucking scott#outlaws does not suck in any special way I CAN TELL YOU THAT BECAUSE I ACTUALLY READ IT INSTEAD OF BLINDLY REGURGITATING WHAT I SEE ONLINE#AND YES BEFORE YOU ASK IT WAS HELL AND IT SUCKED BUT WE OUT HERE ACTING LIKE ITS WAY WORSE THAN IT ACTUALLY IS#We have runs out here that ruin litteral decades of characters building making characters do the craziest shit#outlaws was so fucking weird about koris ch like if you wanna make a smart comment make it about that#roys main problem was that um they okay yeah they ruined his character by removing a crucial part of his identity (lian) so we where doomed#but if we isolate just his characterisation the main problem was how selfish and money driven roy was#that has never been bro he only did contract work so he could give lian a stable life..#ALSO FUCK ANYONE WHO SAYS IM NOT A ROY FAN FOR MOURNING LOST POTENTIAL#OMGOD I AM NOT A JASON STAN ABOVE ROY I JUST DONT HAVE A WEIRD FACINATION WITH HATING ON MENTALLY IL PEOPLE#seriusly its fucking weird how many people spesifically hate jason when he’s clearly got a fucking mood disorder#yall need to fucking chill w how you view mentally il people.#fucking @ me if you want to debate me#dc comics#jason todd#roy harper#koriand'r#kori anders#red hood and the outlaws#starfire#red hood#arsenal
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Nah cAUSE I know, FELIX DIDNOTJUST— there AINT NO WAY.
The Fix-it Felix Jr fromthegame Fix-it Felix Jr. DID NOT call RalpH,
FUCKING B I G N O S E✋️💀
Nah cause Ralph, "B I G eArS" he didn't have to cALL HIM OUT LIKE THAT– cause nAH. Unprovoked,, Ralph out here– OHMYGOD.
RALPH wREcKING CONFIDENCE 🗣
the fucking grin,, the SHIT EATING GRIN! my smug ass, chUCKLING. Man I'm, sO PROUD OF MYSELF
Nah I'm not gonna lie, Felix caught that mug smOoThLy. But then— nah caUSE fIRST OF ALL, a- ✨️AUuGhh~✨️ nnO caUSE,,,,thE soUND. whYTHEFUCK,, MaN, his ass went "AaUuGhh~ BeLiEvE tHiS iS yOuRs."
Man, he's got the vibe, he's the dad that asks, "aRe Y'aLL rEaDy tO RoCk n' RoLL!?"👉👉 after paying the bill at a restaurant.
He would do the finger guns, and the "eheh I mAdE a fuNnY" tone. Man, the genuine grin, like he didn't just make 15 kids cringe. Oh god, the way he was cheering at the race. Homie out here, yel— nah he's not "yelling." He's WHOOPING and HOLLERING, Y'all see it too, right?? Oh man, I'm starting to think this is canon.
Did you guys hear him do the NESQUIKSAND NOISE, that shit caught me off guard! The EXACT same, "oUuGh-oH—"
I fully thought he wasn't going to catch the mug, man. He just got lucky catching the first one💀
#wreck it ralph#fix it felix#wir#fix it felix jr#this was a blessing#AINTTHATJUSTAHBLESSING💀#this fucking guy#I just realised that “rALPH WRECKING CONFIDENCE” ISNT A PROPER SENTENCE#man I was so proud TO BE INCOHERENT PFFFT#you know what. I STILL AM#I took sO LONG to write this. then I read it over im like “well I suppose thatll happen when you havent slept in 48 hours”#actually nah this is cause of excitement AND no sleep pfft#I didnt hear ralph say “big ears” at first amd HOLY SHIT. I was WHEEZING for 20 MINUTES#“nAh cause Felix thought he ATE. but he just sERVED HIMSELF. ROASTED.” a text message I sent#but also I love how chill they are with each other#no cause if I was felix.. “cheers TINYHEAD” 💀#“PINEAPPLE LOOKING ASS–” man💀💀#yEr hAnDs bIG#but nah. he ends up CALLING HIMSELF OUT
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Thinking about how the different races think about teeth.
Hylians, sheikah and gerudo are probably just like humans, baby set and then adult set, mby with little fangs bc I just love that aspect of fantasy.
Zora regrow their teeth like sharks, just have them constantly cooking behind the scenes ready to drop in when one breaks off. I want to say they have more than one row in their mouths, and I will bc its freaky and cool.
Gorons have really dense teeth (not bone), bc they need to crunch through stone and jaw strength only takes you so far. But honestly I reckon their teeth are constantly growing, faster as children and slower as they age. The regular wear and tear keeps them generally small but sometimes you need to break off chunks to keep it manageable. (Kinda like nails? If you let them keep growing then they tend to curl and dig into your skin and cause all sorts of problems)
Rito... don't have teeth. Obviously. They maintain their beaks with various surfaces, cuttlefish if you're fancy, but like if it breaks that's pretty much it, either leave it or get a prosthetic. But teeth? That freaks them out. Wdym ur bones are exposed and sometimes fall out how are you okay with this?!?
#...all of this too say it would be REALLY funny if on like a champion mission or smth link gets hit a bit too hard and looses a tooth#and urbosa is like “yikes. thats unfortunate. but hey youre young lets hope it was a baby”#(it wasnt)#miphas got her hands in his mouth “hmm i cant see the next tooth yet but im sure itll be here soon :))#how long does it usually take for you?“#daruks there “dont worry brother tiny teeth are all the rage with young gorons these days. youll still be able to enjoy a rock roast!”#and revali is torn between making fun of link for losing his bones and being horrified that sometimes they just FALL OUT of hylians#like what the fuck could that happen to him? is his beak just going to fall off one day? surely not#zeldas already taken the tooth to study it bc how the fuck does he eat rocks without breaking them is it magic??#anyway thats my silly little thought#rito#goron#hylian#sheikah#gerudo#zora#botw#loz#moss' madness
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formerly an essay in tags but - billie lurk. half-nameless, misremembered woman. her powers derived from the things taken from her, without any catharsis or empowerment. the rat charm, tied with deidre's hair, her lover's voice in the mouth of rats. her arm and eye, taken, given back only to cause her chronic pain, then lost again. foresight seems a cruel gift for a woman who botched the timing of her takeover of the whalers, and bet wrong when it came to delilah.
she never bore the outsider's blessing; his first visit to her was more like an assault. every other dishonored POV character gets the choice to be selfish, and for that selfishness to mean something, but billie's actions have no effect on the world at large, either, in a game without a chaos system.
some say that corvo is the ghost, but he can reach out and change things. billie's buried herself twice and come back and nothing she does seems to matter - she is less a protagonist, more a convenient full stop in the narrative.
try this: open doto, start a new game. sit in her cabin. notice how little of billie there is. even the woman she loved more than anyone has the face of another named character.
she sits amongst the assets of other games: empty canvases and a dressmaker's mannequin that wears nothing.
#billie lurk#even the wiki is wrong about her its infuriating#pulled this out of tags because fuck it#in daud's DLCs even the stories that weren't about him were about him#but billie's stories are the scrapheap. they're the stuff they couldn't squeeze in elsewhere. cheap jokes and macguffins#i'm not even roasting the devs for this i think releasing dishonored in 2016 then DotO in 2017 was a feat (derogatory)#games should be made slowly and with love#and i know that everyones talked about this endlessly#but billie is my fav and it sucks that she got a game that only causes me to grieve for her as a character#not FOR her as a person#only the potential story that never was. that she never got.#you can have your strong black woman and not turn her into a trope. give her depth and range and heartache and agency. yes there was traged#but how did it SHAPE her?#dont get me started on her being designated caretaker of a former god and dying assassin. what the fuck#some of this i'd be more okay with if she was younger - i mean. the blank canvases? really?#this game could have been about wyman and there's not that much that would have changed in terms of the core story#“found out the asshole that killed your mother is still around. gonna go deal with that.”#emily who is stoned: “cool.bring me snacks on the way back”#wyman: “oh he's saying actually it was gods fault and that its possible to kill him. well i have literally nothing in my schedule”#billie's not surprised by anything anymore but maybe wyman would freak out over most of it. could have been a lot of fun#also you cant fuck up wymans characterisation. they barely exist.#local empress sends her enby girlboyfriend to kill god#pres writes increasingly deranged essays in the tags#death of the outsider spoilers#i have to complain about doto once every year or so or i die#but i'm not really gonna let arkane hide behind dev excuses when it comes to racism like. its not enough
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guys wtaf im back in my 7ds phase lol I WATCHED 4KOA BC I MISSED ARTHUR WHAT IS THIS BEHAVIOUR
#༊*·˚ wandering goddess#no bc i deadass opened my docs to my old af 7ds fanfic and reread it bc its basically oc x arthur pendragon#but omg my babes wtaf happened to you and wHICh cream you using YOU DID NOY FUCKING AGE IN 16 YEARS HELLOOOOO#no bc for funzies i caught up w it and omg ngl he went from hehe hahas to haha hehes lmao#HES STILL MY SUNSHINE BOY INSIDE OMG U STILL FUNNY MY LOVE#a lil insane but you still make me giggle hehehe#i made an oc where its his kid so instead of him using the bride excuse his kid is gonna be the one having guinevere as his bride#arthur having a daughter who is gonna be crushing on lancelot and hes just chill abt it like what a chill dad#but his son is like oh hell the fuck nah lancelot better stay over a hundred feet from my sister bc he kinda overprotective of her#nnt#seven deadly sins#four knights of the apocalypse#arthur pendragon#lancelot#lancelot 4koa#OMGOMG NOT TO MENTION ME MAKING A SCENE WHERE ITS JUST HIM COMPLETELY ROASTING GUINEVERE AND LANCELOT#g:“exactly! don’t ever fall in love with me because the only one in my heart is lancelot!” “keep zeraphina(oc's sister) away from him!”#s:“the hell did you just say?” “lancelot? are you saying that my precious little sister falls in love with that asshole? no fuckin’ way.”#a: “syrius watch your language.”#s:“do you hear the shit coming from her father?”#a:“princess guinevere holds the power to see the future accurately and in more detail than you’d expect.”#g:“you don’t need to worry i already stole his first kiss away from zeraphina.”#s:“oh fuck no” “met him once and now I KNOW that guy needs to hit the dungeons for kissing a child.”#g:“excuse you?! i kissed him first!”#s:“then you’re a victim. shut ‘ta fuck up?” “father if what you’re saying is true about her powers"#s“aren’t you the slightest bit concerned that your daughter is out there getting a boyfriend?”#a“me and your mother wed at your age(16). i trust her judgment.”#s:“you TRUST her judgment?” “she’s getting courted by one of the four knights of apocalypse.”
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So schön und heiter wie du kann man nur sein, wenn man nicht ›Immensee‹ liest und niemals versucht, selbst dergleichen zu machen; das ist das Traurige!…
this book is fucking hilarious
#my soul is the soul of a poet you don’t UNDERSTAND#she probably hasn’t even read immensee 😤#otherwise she’d be thinking deep thoughts like me instead of enjoying her life#you (an idiot): frivolous. likes to dance. can be seen smiling. doesn’t read theodor storm#me (an intellectual): dark and tormented. gazes angstily out of windows that have their blinds drawn#gets sad wet creature eyes when my crush doesn’t pay attention to me. does read theodor storm#we are not the same#the way thomas mann roasts the absolute fuck out of him when he does the window thing too#silly goose‚ you can’t even see out that window!#this dumbass hasn’t even noticed how fucking stupid he looks lol. idiot#if i were an author i too would take every opportunity to clown on my own characters#//#tonio kröger#thomas mann
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Inept 8 year old boy dragon tries to save floating island is such a concept
#momo just tell him!!! you've done this before!!! yeahhh#'this roof ain't big enough for the both of us'#luffy just telling momo to throw him something too akdhakaj this is back to how he was with koby but it worked so...#just grow some balls man!!! if he can spit something so can you!! BITE HIM!!! AHEKAHQK HE DID IT!!!! YEAHHH!!!!#he drew blood omg.... hell yes..... just be careful he doesn't bite back#luffy's exposure therapy is so effective. worlds greatest psychologist i have been saying this.#also nekomamushi and inuarashi better not die. i am also saying this.#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1050#me as baby chopper crying. actually and for real.#i don't have any points to prove for this but sanji and zoro look married in wano. idk man. i can just feel it.#i remember several episodes ago i was complaining about the missmatch of the colors on luffy.... i forgor why the band is purple.... qjwjaj#the music.... slay#i might be getting the luffy worms again i feel so insane..... what do you mean the sky parted.... omg neko and inu.... KICK THEIR ASSES!!!!#luffy fighting kaido and he still has time to boss momo and yamato around ajdbaks and roast him too lmao#momo thinking about kinemon and kiku....#PEROSPERO AND JACK FINALLY!!!!!!!!! carrot omg..... pedro avenged ✔️ now fucking orichi.... how many heads does he have left.....#why is luffy turning supersayian aldjaksn#episode 1051#just saw trafalgay written on a comment and idk if its on purpose or a misspelling but thags so funny akshaksjaka#yamato and momo father-son bonding time <3 teaching him how to be a dragon... so sweet#also the race of people that could set themselves on fire on mariejoa??? kinda random dropping it in there but alas... ✍️✍️#zoro didn't want franky to help but there he goes.... out of onigashima... a good franky fart would have prevented that...#petition to rename coup de burst to franky fart. like why is it even in french. he is A YANKEE.#episode 1052#boy dragon sounds like boy genius. who wants to join my band
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cinematic parallels <3
#a3#twisted wonderland#maybe there's another itaru scene that matches better idk i haven't read every event#but i had the funniest possible experience of reading the moon and the rabbit event where they reference the night walk#and they all bring up how pissed they were at itaru for making them lose and i was like 'damn what did he even do??'#and then LATER actually reading into the night and finding out that he fucking WANDERED OFF TRYING TO GET A PHONE SIGNAL#JUST SO HE COULD CHECK HIS RANK IN HIS MOBILE GAME. WHEN THEY WERE ALMOST AT THE FINISH LINE.#itaru you 100% deserved to be getting roasted for that. i love you so much.#they are both sooo stupid i love them
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Rip to the Emperor, just got rejected 3 times in a row in increasingly more painful ways
#bg3#baldur’s gate 3#jsdhfks#empy fans turn away this is a roast post dfgjkhg#(side note i'll be using he/him for emperor just because i cant tell what the game has in mind with mind flayer pronouns tbh)#Alfhart was first and like. I dont know what Empy was expecting from the guy that hates him just as much if not more than Lae'zel does#but what he got was a very solid fuck off followed by sarcasm at his mask falling off and laughter at his threat#(Latter doesnt happen in game but it does in my heart)#Then it was Olur who was trying to keep the conversation more neutral. Until the squid flirted and he was so taken aback dnbfg#he called him a freak and that he should have thrown the prism in the shadow curse#Then poor Ayre jksf just genuinely so uncomfortable the whole way through. for a mind reader Emperor does NOT get the hint#'i dont really know how i feel about this forced alliance' ' you tried to control me :(' THEN HE FLIRTS AND AYRE IS STRAIGHT UP TERRIFIED#rip emperor you sure tried#cant wait to get to omelluum again#it's going to be SOOOOO funny when alfhart gets him out and is like : of course i saved you- i rather like you :)#POINTEDLY TO PISS THE EMPEROR OFF#only one illithid he respects and it's not you <3 fucking loser
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1, 7, 37!!
1) hearing Bring Me to Life by Evanescence for the first time (it opened my third eye and I've been a silly little emo kid ever since), unfortunately my narcissistic mum (trauummmaaa ✨), and my wonderful fiance 💕
7) so many things scare me, I am a massive weenie. but honestly I'm most scared of my fiance dying lol. I love him so much I can't imagine my life without him
37) I don't really have any secrets of my own (I'm an open book lol) but I'll spill someone else's tea; a friend of mine accidentally got his cheating ex pregnant AFTER they split up. he is DYING because he doesn't wanna be a dad (again mind you. he already has an accidental son from a previous relationship) but she's keeping it. she is CRAZY (for multiple reasons) and we all hate her so pour one out for my boi
#m: ask.#he really is living inside a soap opera rn#mans pullout game is weak af and YES i have roasted him about it#you fucked yourself into this situation but i dont think you can fuck yourself out my guy#idiot had to go to the baby shower last weekend. took his mate with him for moral support hshdhdjfjfk#he's a lovely dad to his son tho. his son is so freaking cute
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