#And ask me if I heard what he said
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okay update on the whole stalker boy thing
read this first if you haven’t
#So basically I found out I was not the only person he was starting rumors about#People would come up to me randomly in the hallway#And ask me if I heard what he said#obviously I wouldn’t have bc I try to space myself from him#but anyways#These random girls tried to jump him while we were on a school trip#they dumped water on him while we were on the bus 😭😭#And when we got off they actually tried to fight him got the got split up bc we were loud#Maybe like 2 days later the video came out and I found out he was talking about this one girls friend and she got mad#But that girl doesn’t like me and my sister bc her boyfriend likes my sister#But idk what that has to do with me but whatever#But yeah he kinda stopped trying to be with me all the time#😀😀
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I saw an interesting post a while back that said “Capcom made us [Miles and Diego/Godot] only have like two(?) interactions because they knew we would be unstoppable with a brother dynamic” and tbh it stuck with me bc it was intriguing.
So yeah that potential brotherhood, but that Godot/Diego AU I made (that I still need a name for)
Also I bet Gregory Edgeworth would have smelled like a bit like coffee, and so Diego just reminds Miles of that comforting presence 😭 (the von Karma estate was a tea household, so he didn’t smell much coffee after DL-6 and didn’t realize how much he missed it/reminded him of his father)
#doctorsiren#ace attorney#ace attorney au#diego armando#prosecutor godot#miles edgeworth#comic#ace attorney fanart#good guy godot au#art#digital art#my art#fanart#procreate#loving the inconsistent styles for Miles in the panels HAHA#that post also made me think of an AU where after the Fawles case. miles goes to Diego asking for help because he can’t stop thinking about#what happened on the stand and he can’t go to his mentor bc he’s showing weakness and that’s not allowed#and essentially long story short. miles decided to drop prosecuting after one case and be a defense attorney and he asks Diego to protect#him from von karma and also to be his mentor#so it’s like Mia and Phoenix but it’s Diego and Miles and then after Diego gets poisoned. Mia has to mentor Miles and she’s a little#hesitant at first because of how cocky he was in that trial but she sees that he’s genuinely trying to be better#also Diego would ask miles: you’re trying to be what von Karma wants you to be…well..what do YOU want to be?#and miles would answer: I want to be my dad#JUST LIKE IN MY 1985 ANIMATIC#ANYWAYS I’M BRAINROTTING SO HARD RN EXCUSE ME LMAO#ALSO MY FRIEND SAID THAT IN THIS AU (the one in the post) DIEGO AND PHOENIX ARE ENEMIES TO BROTHERS#and that’s the best thing I’ve heard all day it’s such a funny statement AND IT’S TRUE!!!!
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Everybody has the theory that Armand turns Daniel out of anger; but my theory is that Daniel gets injured, or has like a heart attack or something (the guy is old and has parkinson's, and Louis was trashing his house okay?) and Armand is SCARED AF and ends up turning him out of fear of Daniel dying, like in the books.
And then Armand immediately regrets it, and nopes the fuck out of there; and instead of the Devil's Minion where we had Armand following Daniel, we will have Daniel searching for Armand.
Just think of it, it would be a nice comparison to the book.
#amc iwtv#iwtv hell thoughts#iwtv#amc interview with the vampire#armand#armand iwtv#daniel molloy#devils minion#like yeah#my theory is that Daniel gets on the verge of death and Armand is like “oh shit oh fuck”#so he turns Daniel out of despair and fear#like#“what if Louis blames me”“what if he dies and I never told him my story”#so he goes and turns him and after he realizes what he did so he's “oh shit oh fuck” again#and doesn't even know if he's gonna survive like Nikki or if he just created a monster and instantly regrets it#because he did the one thing he said he didnt want to do#and he runs because what else can you do when all your life has basically been destroyed#he doesn't want to face Louis or Daniel#and that's why Daniel asks Louis if he has heard anything about Armand because poor bastard was turned and abandoned#and being the reporter he is he will try to search for Armand
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My friend and I burnt chicken nuggets together because she read the oven cook time as the microwave cook time and even though I thought ten minutes to microwave a plate of chicken nuggets was astronomically high I didn't say anything because she's usually smarter than me and then when it got to around 7 minutes we were both like "woah these chicken nuggets smell AMAZING like these are REAL chicken nuggets" but even still we didn't think that might mean it's a good time to stop cooking them until eventually at 9 minutes the smell turned rancid and when I threw open the microwave they were fully charred. We're not allowed to cook together anymore.
#Thankfully the fire alarm didn't go off but it was BAD#And then I took the plate outside to dump in the trash but I had no shoes on because I forgot them in my haste#So I'm walking around in socks on the sidewalk holding a scorched plate of chicken nuggets#And I pass this guy going the opposite way and panicked because I was like “surely he's gonna ask why I'm carrying burnt chicken nuggets”#So when he got close I just said “chicken nuggets” at him and I don't even know if he heard me but God it was embarrassing#Like I didn't even have to say anything but I did anyways#Disaster day#This is what I'm usually like on my meds
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Los Chicos Peleandoooooo
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#song lan#xue yang#I know it makes jokes less funny if you explain them but I feel like I gotta for this one:#xue yang’s Spanish here is playing on the fact he’s a beginner (using a commonly taught phrase)#combined with the fact that he’s clearly taking what he’s heard Xiao Xingchen use.#of course XY would want to know how to cuss someone out in another language. Do you think XXC would teach him how? Nope.#XY would ask ‘How do I to someone I really hate them?’#and XXC would say ��You tell them ‘Te Amo Mucho’ :•)’#As FAR as XY is concerned he knows *so* many swears. These words are just terms of endearment.#XXC would not swear or cuss anyone out but he *would* punctuate phrases with general terms of endearment.#More so directed towards A-Qing but Xue Yang has been proven to be a decent indirect learner.#That said he has also been shown to Not Quite Get The Nuances (consequences of observational learning).#Sadly he never had a good observational model for love or compassion B*(#Spanish speakers please oh god please correct me if I biffed something badly here. I can fix it.
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Watching the Charlos reverse Barcelona track sim video & it’s just reiterating to me that Carlos’s entire approach to Charles is “happy wife happy life” and I’m feeling some type of way about it
When it comes to Charles, Carlos seems to be half 'happy wife, happy life', and half 'push/boss him around' (which, coincidentally, also falls into the first mindset bc charles likes it...)
Tbh I feel like Carlos’ whole Monaco attitude as well, with ‘the target this weekend is a win for Charles,’ reached all new heights of the 'happy wife, happy life' mantra. Charles is gonna be high off of that for at least a couple of months
#he said “where do you want me to turn around mi amor?”#that's what I heard anyway#anon#ask#charlos#gifs#mine#Spanish GP '24#2024#charles leclerc#carlos sainz
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made that template for three :3 venchiya rundown!!! more in tags if u care
#i have lots of aus for us but this is the og venchiya au#where i have a studio and work downtown and they live downtown so i actually see them all the time#i would watch them from 3 stories up bc they intrigued me#always thought they were a cute couple but the red guy looked like he was being followed against his will even tho they did everything tgtr#heard a commotion one late night in the studio and saw the red guy beating the fuck out of someone in the alley across the street#locked eyes with black haired guy and he waved and smiled like a freak and i just kept drawing#started doing sketches of them when i was supposed to be working on bigger projects#passed by them one day on my way to work and black haired one said hello. i ignored him#one day i'm asked to give a private tour at the gallery and i come downstairs and it's them#red hair guy does not gaf#black haired guy asks thoughtful questions and seems to care about art but is a bit unsettling to me#i dont think much of it until he starts showing up more frequently and alone#the interactions are pleasant but i cant shake what i saw that one time so i tell security to be wary of him from then on#and i stop staying late in the studio for a few weeks#fast forward 8 months and we're not friends not dating but some secret third thing where i'm always at their apartment#we kiss cuddle and have sex but theres no labels but i refuse to see anyone else and i know neither of them are either#also to touch on takiishis sexuality he did not know that and doesnt gaf that is my conclusion after spending lots of time with him#his closet is in no way gendered he wears whatever he wants and if he gave af to label it he'd be nb#i think hes very cool and he intrigues me and i like going shopping with him and getting our nails done together#i stay at theirs a lot despite having my own place bc i like spending mornings with takiishi#and i assume if he didnt like to then he wouldnt sit at the table with me...or maybe hes just food motivated#i like his mystery#we are alone together in the mornings because endo goes to the gym in the morning and then he comes back all sweaty and sexy#ok ive exhausted everything i wanted to talk about thank u for ur time and for reading if u made it this far#mwah love u all#venchiya <3#wait also to be clear endo is still using random women's cards in this au i'm def not giving that man my money#LOL
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just kill me
#this whole article is bad but this was the WORST#not even for the reason you think (819 reasons)#Eliza you've already heard this rant but#if I can be way too sincere and long-winded for a moment#'always if I ask him something he helps'#how many quotes do we have from teammates over the years saying that exact thing#michael latta saying 'it doesn't matter if you're a top pair dman or a 4th line peasant; he'll do anything to help you'#christian djoos saying 'he's always there for you no matter what time or place. if something's up he's always there'#HHA saying recently nicke gave him his number and told him 'if you need anything just call me and I can help you'#carly in that interview when this was announced saying how nicke has been the support for everyone in that locker room from himself and osh#to guys who haven't been there long like strome and even pacioretty#I know holts and batya and andre and rasmus and jojo and tj and tom and karl alzner have all said stuff like this too#and that's just who I can think of off the top of my head#like. that's it. that's nicke.#if you ask him something. he helps.#for such an amazing athlete. for such a crucial part of making hockey A Thing in DC.#what his teammates want to talk about is his kindness#and that speaks so highly of him and is so genuinely admirable to me and worth aspiring to#I don't want to put anyone on a pedestal because we don't know these guys#but like. in terms of impact. nicke really genuinely made me try to be a better more thoughtful more actively outreaching friend#because I saw the way his teammates talked about him and that's how I want to be thought of.#I want people to know I'll be there for them. & not that I haven't been willing to do that but I've been more active about offering it#and part of that genuinely is because of his example#there's a million other things about his kindness I could mention before I even get to his hockey but this has already gone on far too long#so anyway#he is so dear to me#I hope he is happy and healthy#and that he knows how loved he is#nicklas backstrom#hockey
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Mickrin
Fifth entry of my “Dunmeshi rarepairs I will birth with my own hands if I have to” series. This one’s straight up embarrassing, like of course the shadow version of Chilchuck and Marcille would get me.
It suddenly grabbed me out of nowhere. What got me thinking about it is this exchange, first comic third panel, because like… Woah. He knows she has a thing for Kabru? Or something. And he has NO FEAR. Like it’s so forward and has 0 pretenses lmao. And then I thought… And oh no. Oh no.


"I can fix him" x "I can make her worse"
Very uptight and strict and rules-following and too self-aggrandizing tbh x will not hesitate to insult you to your face and sleazy and free spirit…. Kuro is involved in an ot3 of sorts in my head and basically they drag her into Situations of various moral standing aka scams or idk going to a club god forbid. I think she needs to relax and get taken down 1 peg maybe, and I think he needs like…….. Someone to teach him what is unhealthy lmao, also remind him to get work benefits, and if they can like get to feel safe and comfy with one another (and god just the road there would be a beautiful trainwreck to watch) they would be gossip besties worsties.
Kabru needs to be the epitome of morals but like, if it’s Mickbell she can lower the bar… Just for him… <3 She can fix him just a little and she’ll be like "wow! Ok I can settle for this amount of upstanding behavior from you Mickbell you get a gold star"
I never expected it ok I read this extra expecting nothing and god knows why I saw him be like "hey u like Kabru right. You’re his babysitter right. Which poor sap is being Kabru’s maid" with 0 fear and her being so casually pissed back at him and idk, how they’re so comfy being not polite with one another but they’re still coworkers-friends despite it… Crazy for how prickly they both are that they manage that much. They bicker and see each other as annoying at best but weirdly dependable and friends despite it all and……….. I am going to grow them in a lab and observe how I can make it work
MICKBELL IS A REBOUND MORE AT 9??? Maybe Rin and Mickbell have a one night stand and then the aftermath dynamic is this….. She probably regrets it. And then it gets more complex and grows into something odd as she becomes hyperaware of him and they have this little complicity thing going on….
I think cuddling with Kuro (who would be more like a platonic protective & soothing presence in his and Rin’s relationship rather than romo) would destress her actually I think she needs and deserves it. Go to a dog cafe bbygirl it’ll fix you. So what I’m saying is the three of them watch a movie and Rin and Mickbell are sitting on Kuro’s laps and everyone is so comfy. Kuro’s legs die halfway through but he’s self-sacrificing it’s fine….. Actually Mick is on his laps Rin’s just nuzzled into his side. There, fixed. I am so weirdly invested in them… They’re funky to think about. Rin seeing Mickbell and Kuro like "you guys are aware that what you two have is fucked up right" and then joining them in the messy dynamic 🤝 Put them in situations. That will be all.

The sheer amount of sass on their own, let alone together…





Make them get drunk together it’ll be glorious


#Dungeon meshi#mickbell tomas#rinsha fana#I’m sorry i see visions in my hot coco mugs#Fumi rambles#Dunmeshi rarepairs#I’ve had these two in the back of my mind for months by now i’m like. Idk if i’ll write them at one point but it’d be neat#Rin needs more love. This does it for me idk. Think of the shenanigans. Someone chasing after Mick and Kuro and they drag her through the#Alleys along. Market-going turned very wrong. Someone said since both Mick and Kuro are pretty touchy feely they’d lean on her &#I think that’s cute#Mickrin#Rinbell is also cute but eh#Everyone needs Kuro tbh he’s just so laidback and good#Kabru notices early and is like. Now what the fresh hell happened while i stopped looking at you guys for 2 secs. Good for u but also huh??#I swear i have actual meta posts coming soon i just have demons to exorcise every so often#If you ask me for another rin ship that isn’t qpr it’d prob be Pattadol. Toshiro too I’ve heard fun ideas for it but Pattadol…#Her little ‘money~’ laugh is weird lol. One common point with Mick?
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unusual face post where i don't bring up caname marriage. all of their gangstalia childhood photos have been shown! i've been very captivated by their answers




the question is virtually the same for each of them with different wordings. here lord and owner have a goal for their future. between a distinguished admirable grown up and a welcoming hotel runner. meanwhile hero and parrain's answer are like. so vague. [(i?) can be anything] and [(be?) me] makes me laugh. what are these kids even saying? such blatant different personality dynamics. i actually don't have any coherent words i just point at a difference and go wowwww coool(keys jingling in front of me). but really. how sweet!!! the different similar answers
#kill ame#gangstalia#i've heard lots of interpretation on ame's answer being#kind of petulant. i don't know if thats the right word but. mostly because he interrupted the interviewer asking#and because of the “what do you want me to say?” right before it#dismissive towards adults#and maybe to the thought of adulthood here? he can be anything he wants~#some interps see it as him being annoyed. a little fed up. sure i'll play by you... grown-up's demands...#i'm open to whatever goes honestly... hero is kind of an enigma right now. i love him dearly#refusal to give a “proper” answer to an interview could probably be seen as rude.(i don't think interviewers would mind much tho)#so hero and parrain here is a point of interest for me#and on another point!!! frus has captivated me before and now especially so with them both having to do with immortality interacting with#-humans who they care for who died#i don't angst over davie too much because it feels more like just one example. but that's frus's commonalityyyy (^_^)#and today it pops up again! their answers feel almost romantic to me. maybe less so for hero because(like i said before)...#but it's like a musing thought. i can be anything. i'd be me. what funny kids#the face family dynamic isn't a thing here but it's funny to think about with this. unexpected on who feels similar to who
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imagining a defiant interrogation whumpee who gets sick of saying "I'm not telling you" so they start going into what sounds initially to be them finally telling whumper what they want to know, but ends up being whumpee wasting time by just quoting a song.
#pyreprompts#whump prompt#I have a scene or two for Kevin specifically#'Why have I taken up arms against you you ask? Well#I was walking down by island bridge#Just rambling about- going as I please#That day was warm and there was such a gentle breeze#It was the month of April I believe#I strolled up by the monument then laid down in the grass#Then I heard a soldiers voice behind me. It said#Meet me at the pillar son meet me there at noon. I need you brave young Irishmen there's something we must do...#He said his name was Padraig Pearce and he just kept on calling me'#Meet me at the pillar is such a good song even if extremely call to action#But that's just been my vibe so youknow#Doesn't even have to be an interrogation really#'So what's with the red hair and green eyes combo? Isn't that a little on the nose for a fenian?'#'Well first off- it has been incredibly difficult to hide while trying to cross boarders you're right#Secondly that's just kinda what happens when you have a county cork mother and an ulsterman father.#It's just a horrid color problem I've been left with- this orange and green.'#I imagine Kevin specifically would take it as a challenge to 1. See how obscure a rebel song he can pull up and#2. See how long it takes for the other guy to notice not a word he is saying is actually true or relevant#The exact scenes I'm imaging are in a au idk if I'll ever actually post publicly#But I might write them as him messing around with Zander#I still need to post something with Zander maybe this will be it
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Both my parents actually suffer from HORRID emotional dysregulation and are prone to snapping and going into rages. My sister is the same way tbh. I am now realizing this is why they are constantly baffled by the question of whether or not I am mad at them.
I don't have external meltdowns.
I could. I don't let it happen.
I keep my rage on the inside and stay pretty quiet about it. It's just as strong as theirs [physically shaking nose bleed from high blood pressure kind of bad], but like as a kid I saw how terrifying it was to be around [dad breaking dishes, mom putting our lawn chairs into walls] and I just internalized that I wasn't going to wear that anger on the outside.
So my mother genuinely cannot tell if I am just being quiet or if I am silently hearing the dial-up noises of pure rage. This has lead her to both making strong and confident statements like "You are a pacifist who would never hurt a fly U.U" but also acting like I am secretly dangerous maybe... It's because she has never seen me snap.
She knows what her temper is like [throwing chairs through walls], she knows what my father's temper is like [pick up child and toss out door], and she can tell I am being tested, but she doesn't know what happens when I snap or where that breaking point is.
Her -perhaps unhinged- solution to this, my whole life, has been to do things that should obviously enrage me or shut me down completely, like ignoring important boundaries, repeatedly, punishing me for expressing emotions or needs at all, etc... And then to constantly ask me if I am angry with her when I get too quiet [right after near directly telling me to shut up].
It has occurred to me now, they have never once seen me lose my temper, so they literally just can't tell if I am angry at them. My sister is easy, my mother fights and screams with my sister constantly, my mother understands this. My mother doesn't have any grasp of feelings or boundaries that are not screamed at her [apparently, and I fear my sister is the same way]. Her and my sister are close despite constant fucking fighting because they understand each other.
They are trying to get me to engage the same way and it is not working. I realize now that this has been hard for them.
I was so successfully taught to suppress my emotions, by being punished for any outburst, that rage quiet looks the same as any other kind of quiet from the outside. To them anyway.
I did tell her. For the record. I used my words. I did tell her very calmly that my response to rage, in order to avoid doing the things that terrified me as a child, was to simply leave [the autistic urge to GTFO]. When a situation or person causes too much of the dial-up rage noise, I simply extract myself from that situation, up to and including never speaking to a person again. I explained this calmly. I explained it calmly 100 times and I explained that I explain myself calmly as my rage response 1-5 [also pretty much every other negative emotion tbh], and I told her that what came next was me simply opting out and fucking off. I told her this. I couldn't understand why she never took me seriously, or why she never fucking understood.
I couldn't understand what made her like this.
But it's the same problem I have with everyone else multiplied by a factor of 10.
If I am explaining myself calmly, they can't understand that it's actually serious or that I am actually upset. ESPECIALLY because they read me as "female" and women "aren't that rational" so if I am not screaming and crying about something, which I never do, people assume I can't be upset and it isn't serious.
And then after having my boundaries ignored too many times despite having calmly explained how and why it's a problem [shaking inside or not]... I leave. I leave and everyone gets upset like this is unexpected behaviour, even though I told them 50 times that is how I would respond if they kept doing *the thing.*
And for neurotypical people especially, they are expecting there to be a disconnect between what someone says they need or feel and what their actually boundaries and feelings are, and they expect the latter to be demonstrated with emotions. Telling them bluntly you do not function that way somehow never helps?
My mother isn't just looking for normal yelling or a few tears to know I am serious, whether or not I do those either [I don't], she's looking for an explosion to know there's a problem at all.
Fucked if I know how she proceeds through life this way in general or if this is just her expectation of her own kids???
And I couldn't get why my mother couldn't read my emotions and didn't seem to think I have any. It's because she's testing for the rage limit to see where my 'actual' limit is instead of taking my word for it. Never the fuck mind that she could simply *not* test at my boundaries instead of letting me have them. Separate issue.
I couldn't figure out what made her *like this*
She's expecting me to throw a giant meltdown violent tantrum at people when I have 'actually' had enough. Maybe she got away with those being like 5'4" in another time, but I am the size of the average man, I do not get to have giant screaming rages, whether or not people perceive me consciously as a woman, and least of all because a lot of people -at least unconsciously- read me as 'masculine' or at least always "they guy" of the situation compared to all other women and some men [bigger stronger and more rational, more able to just absorb the damage and let it go so the less rational screaming/crying one doesn't have to be dealt with]. Even if it was in me to be willing to terrify people [usually never], there are such limited instances where it wouldn't just blow back on me. Potentially very dangerously.
I am going to be the quiet calm one. You are going to have to let me use my words, bitch.
So she kept ignoring my boundaries until I had to cut her out of my life, and she probably doesn't understand and probably thinks it feels sudden -after 36 long years of bullshit- abrupt and unfair.
But I told her hundreds of times.
I probably should have just screamed at her.
#good stay out of our yard' and he didn't seem to know what to say to that#but other than that I don't think anyone in my adult life has ever seen me turn aggressive at all to the point where people 100% like to#play games of testing my patience and my boundaries because they think my tolerance is infinite#but like I have autistic rage tantrums on both sides of my family and they are just happening inside my head#And somehow it took me until now to realize that being that way was actually -expected- of me by my parents and especially my mother#and that by keeping myself outwardly level headed to be considerate I actually took away whatever signals she can understand#to have empathy for how I must be feeling#I mean it's still all on her#but it makes so much sense of why she's fucking *like this*#And why my sister thinks I hate her just because -she- stopped texting -me-#but that fucking guy#Every time I was like#In my adult life I have screamed at someone ONE whole time and it was 1000% deserved#And I threw heavy objects around one whole other time and in my defense I didn't do it in front of the guy he just felt the ground shaking#heard the thuds and came back to the logs blocking his path because that fucker wouldn't stop parking in our yard after being asked#and then TOLD not to about 10 times because he was acting entitled to just park in our yard and was crushing my plants???#seriously I don't know what his deal was but he wouldn't stop telling me how much the ground shaking scared him like it was supposed#to get my pity like I think this guy took one look at the logs I had just tossed down and was suddenly afraid of this “woman” he was#bullying in their own yard and so my ability to feel bad for scaring him had gone straight out the fucking window#I looked at him and said stop parking in our yard instead of your own you are killing my plants#he'd just fucking be like 'well the last people to live here let us D: :)“ and I'd be like ”good for them?“ ”stop“#and he'd just keep doing it#I was having a week of insomnia and was finally having the best dream#the kind of sex dream you have like twice in your life#and this fucker had just gotten some noisy ass little bike with a spoiler on it#and starts it up right under my window at 3am from IN OUR FUCKING YARD#so I had a nice long anger nap and just after he got home from work and was sleeping in his house#I picked up these chunks of deadwood tree from the back#there was like 3-4 logs that used to be a WHOLEASS fucking oak tree Like these logs were not as heavy as they -looked- but they were still#this fucker deleted half the tags I wrote and I am not retyping that fuck you tumblr so fucking hard
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LMAOOOOOO listen up it's storytime
so I put in my resignation letter almost a month ago and my boss still haven't talked to me about it
(it's ok, I have no desire to talk to him either xD)
BUT the rumor has it that he's apparently offended by the whole situation! because I put the letter through the HR (like any normal person) and didn't tell him about that directly nor did I give him a copy personally! he had to learn about it from the HR! the blasphemy!
He like full on didn't talk to me and avoided me and like pretended I'm air the whole time
Holy fuck 🤣🤣🤣 but ok there's more
yesterday he took me aside and hits me with this line: "When are you going to talk to me about what you submitted?"
Hmmm 🤨 weird wording...
but I said that we can talk whenever he has time, no problem. We didn't have the talk then because he was busy and it was almost time for me to be off anyway. "We definitely have to have the talk this week." ok... 🤨
so today he came in earlier than usual, so I think IT'S TIME, but no, he's busy, has several meetings, so on and so forth, nothing unusual, I thought nothing of it
BUT then I chatted with a coworker about the whole thing and she said something that exploded my brain
she thinks that he doesn't talk to me, because he expects me to like… make an appointment and explain myself. and like... CHASE after him for him to make time to talk with me. about why I'm leaving
like DUDE xD
X-FUCKING-D
I HAVE NO WORDS
#his first reaction was apparently that I have “only nonsense ideas in my head”#that's what I heard from his assistant#lmao what a dumbster fire personality#the other owner that's also the sales director and works with me directly#came to me immediately after I put in my resignation to ask about it#like a normal person and business owner I guess#and is trying to negotiate so that I'll stay#but honestly he has no real power over employees' duties#so I doubt he can meet my terms#dude I'm doing main export sales#and I'm the ONLY person taking care of import#my responsibilities' list is 2 pages long!#they'll have to hire like 2 people at least to pick up things in my place#if the whole company doesn't collapse on itself altogether#and I also know that#the only other person in export sales#is also looking for another job so LMAOOOO#our accounting left already#and the people who were supposed to be hired instead#said that they don't want to work here after all#our only full-time delivery man left#and one of our 2 warehouse workers is going to leave soon too#DUDE it's migration time!#QueenOfPosts
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I think it's funny that I've seen some defense regarding Mike's queer coding literally being that "he's not interested in any girls except El" bc that's just simply not how that works (in most cases).
Like I know people joke about their sexuality changing for one person, usually a celebrity, or someone else who's unattainable, but it's rarely ever the actual case. And I also know that it's a TV show so it doesn't necessarily have to be realistic but it's still interesting to think about.
I say this because we have literally no evidence to support Mike being into girls, at all. When talking to Dustin abt Suzie, comparing her to Phoebe Cates, he's has a disgusted-esc look on his face. He has no posters of girls (at least none where they are the focus) on his wall, but he does have posters of buff (fantasy) men. I also wanna mention the 'one way' sign pointing into the closet bc it's honestly iconic. They make a point of Robin commenting on Nancy's Tom Cruise poster, so we know that it's not crazy to be paying attention to these things.
All this to say that most characters in the show have moments of being attracted to people even while in a relationship (given sometimes it's just them talking about celebs or characters but still, I'm pretty sure the only time Mike's done that was w/ Cates and I already discussed that). The defense of Mike "only being attracted to El" is so unrealistic and would be really weird writing.
#went back to double check the posters and i forgot there is a slightly visible woman w/ one of said buff men#forgive me 😔#but my points still stand#i mean have we ever heard Mike talk about girls in a positive light before?#we've never actively heard him say he wanted girls to like him either#it's just implied by Lucas in s1: “you're blind because a girl's not grossed out by you”#🤷♀️ idk it's pretty sus if you ask me#(also i know the examples i mentioned are not the only ones but they're the ones i thought of off the top of my head)#byler#mike wheeler#mike wheeler analysis#mike wheeler i know what you are#mike wheeler the closet is glass#mike wheeler is gay#(or ig possibly bi with a high preference for males)#jay's saying stuff :)#jay's talking ST <3
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i cant believe i wasn't following u b4,,,,,ive just been silently scrolling through your blog for like a solid YEAR and just haven't even noticed????? n e ways what are tha thoughts on literally anyone in p4 being trans bc i live for that 🎤
the way my brain decided that this was asking for pronoun headcanons and did not reread to make sure that was what you were asking before drawing all of this…... well anyways
#asks & requests#p4#trans naoto#<- trans everyone lmaooooo#sort of waffling on chie-- he could also be trans or enby easily#ive always thought he would be a 'my gender is lesbian' type person tho LMAO#if hes trans then she and yukiko are as close as they are because trans friends lmao if chie is afab then i think that would come up#accepting his shadow- part of him not feeling 'feminine' enough is that yukiko is more of a woman than her in societys eyes and well.#its not a violent outing bc no one who heard her shadow is like that but chie apologises to yukiko for that#yukiko transitioned pretty early so no one in town (school age at least) really knows#rise is afab its just that she Despises the idea of being a man#kanji is cis but hes cis+ after exploring; does do the occasional drag but is a gay man who happens to use she/her#yosukes whole vibe is 'probably nonbinary but i have a job so i cant worry about that rn'. also i think maybe bigenderism in his future#he/him only for the foreseeable future tho. baby steps#narukami is defo stealth mode for at least the beginning of the game but probably around teddie or naotos shadow she comes out#and i like kuma so ze is like me and uses it/its. :).#ok those are all my notes. sorry for not directly responding to what you asked but i do think what i said is a good answer to your wuestion.#for claritys sake i also live for it.
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Junicrane/Starstruck Ramble
I will not be brief, all under the cut
To clear some things right off the bat:
No corpse, no proof with Juniper. Obligatory this is set in a canon where he's alive and adjacent to the agency in some way.
Reggie & Juniper are just gay to me, but I don't mind any interpretation of their sexuality
The games are set in 1967/68 to me (based on a couple bits in game) which is before it was legal to be gay in America at least (1971), which is relevant to how I interpret canon as being somewhat grounded in reality, despite unrealistic elements.
This is just an insane amount of headcanons/elements of and AU all culminated into one post. I will talk about some headcanons like they're just facts because they are established in my head, and it saves me over explaining literally everything, however I will explain some parts a little bit for clarity.
Alright. Actual beginning of the ramble:
Juniper is a character to me who had gotten so lost in his job as an actor and a social presence that in the end his whole life revolved around that 'role'. Because of this, by the time he's put into the situation where he's around the Agency, he basically knows nothing about himself, though he doesn't realise at first. Furthermore, what little identity he had has changed in so many ways. He's no longer a beloved famous actor in the prominence of public light, he's legally dead and he tarnished his career just before he was supposed to die, with the bonus of that making him lose the majority of his estate. From that, he also has horrific facial scarring from the electrical burns from literally having his face fried. I believe a friend of mine made a post about this a while ago (I also think they were the first to think it up also), but, to me, Juniper has a permanent trimmer in his right arm (aka his dominant hand) from the electrical current and it is messing with his nervous system.
All in all, he's not doing great, but he's too proud to admit that he's not doing great, because if anything, what's left of his ego is all he has as a defense since he's deep in unfamiliar water.
Before ending up around the agency (I have multiple interpretations of this, so I'm just going to bring it up generally), he'd never actually seen Reggie, and his only impression of him is a single voicemail, which was his only reference he had to later impersonate him. Juniper probably has very little feelings other than the ones he projects onto him because of Phoenix and that, at the very least, he's physically attracted to Reggie to some degree (that's like the beginning of how everything else would tumble into place in this sort of interpretation at least).
And on Crane's side? His feelings towards Juniper are probably very intense and muddled. On the one hand, he adores musical theatre, and that's his now ex-favourite actor. The thought of just casually being around him blows the bit of fanboy in him away at first because THAT'S the GUY, plus the inklings of a celebrity crush which still poke at him. And then there's the rational side of him, which knows Juniper has committed absolute atrocities on the side of Zoraxis, and hates him for that. Then there's how much Juniper comes off as an asshole at first because he refuses to cooperate with anything the Agency tried to put in place. He finds Juniper endlessly frustrating, and yet he's stuck working with him since, afterall, he's the one who knows the Agency's history with Juniper the best. I imagine him acting a lot like how he does IEYTD 1 around Juniper.
At this point, I'm just describing the pitch for a romcom.
I think the start of their relationship with one another largely started with Juniper trying to wind Crane up. It was a way of getting his attention, and I don't think Juniper knows why he's so dead set on that at first, because I don't think he realises he has a crush on 'this grump' at first. (I think that's actually the fun part about these two, because it's almost like a role reversal of the celebrity crush dynamic. This ex-big name actor has a TERRIBLE crush on an average joe and it is KILLING HIM.) But of course the Agency keeps them together because Juniper is at least conversing with Crane, so it's a start.
Through one way or another, they actually get talking casually, at least mildly at first. It takes Juniper a long time to fully deconstruct the wall he's built, and the thing is, Crane isn't the one trying to deconstruct it, at least at first, because yeah, Juniper realises if he wants Reggie to actually like him in any way, he can't keep winding him up. So they talk. Small talk at first, something rhythmic and almost easy to keep to a script. And over time that turns into actual conversations. Genuine ones in which Reggie rips out the occasional one of his jokes which Juniper is endlessly endeared about. The way he smiles just before he makes them, like he wants to chuckle at what he's about to say before he says it. That's probably when Juniper realised that he does have some vague crush on him, and that it wasn't going away.
This is what kickstarts John I can't-buy-you-things-to-impress-you-so-acts-of-service-it-is Juniper to do little things for him. It mostly starts off as him trying to make Reggie his tea how he likes it. However, the nerve damage in his arm makes that hard, as the weight of the kettle and trying to pour is hard all of a sudden. And he refuses to accept that, so he tries for a very long while. Long enough that Crane would go to investigate what was going on. And when he does see Juniper leaning over a cup with the kettle as he uneasily tries to pour it, and when Crane asks Juniper responds so matter-of-fact that his intention is nothing but genuine. And it catches Reggie off guard because Juniper hadn't done anything like that up to that point, and his very apparent vulnerability is so clearly on show.
It shifts something between them.
From that point on, conversations are longer, more familiar. Both of their attitudes soften, and Reggie makes more jokes. Juniper learns how to better use his left hand while strengthening his right back to a point where it could be used again. Slowly, they're both spending time with one another not because they have to, but just because they can. Little bits at first, not too far outside what they already were doing, but those little bits turned into long bits to a point where the other person's company was genuinely desirable.
As time passes, Juniper probably realises that he doesn't genuinely know much about himself or what hobbies he's into, because he never really had the time when he got big, and his home life in his youth wasn't bad, but it wasn't picturesque. I think Reggie would pick up on it, and absolutely try to introduce him to some things he's into. Some things stick, other things don't (corn husking very much stays Reggie's passion, and John will go with him sometimes because it's him, but it's not something he strongly cares for). Crane introduces him to a lot of music, and it's something that becomes a staple between them, with tracks they listen to more than others (tragically, I know relatively little about 60s music so I couldn't really say what). Occasionally they dance, never anything intense, think slow dancing, but the closeness is nice.
Through all of it, Juniper is battling the worst crush of his life, and he can't stand it, because I think he struggles to read people since he doesn't have anything like a script or a director to refer back to, so he has no idea if Reggie likes him back or if he's just desperate for that to be true. I think because of that any sort of confession between them would be incredibly raw, not only because of the time they live in making it hard for them to be truthful about how they love, but because it's a complete show of Juniper who's worked to be this better person. I don't exactly know how that would go, mainly because I don't have one set version of their dynamic, this post is just a generalisation of main consistent points.
Reggie does like him back, because he's gotten used to Juniper being just this guy, not a figure in the public eye, not a Zoraxis lackey, and not any sort of Agency operative (despite being under their care to some degree). He's someone he genuinely cares for, because they've given one another the time of day to learn one another, and I think because Reggie was a field agent, he was a lot better at reading Juniper than Juniper was at reading him. Eventually Juniper's company becomes something he could see around him for the rest of his life, and I think he accepts that he likes Juniper a lot more gracefully.
I think any affection directed at Juniper would at first be met with him feeling a little muddled. Reggie was a very physically affectionate person when he could be, and sure the initial flirting with one another came with the occasional little touches, but everything now was so deeply intentional. I also don't think Juniper would almost ever get over the novelty of being able to kiss him, or many other gestures, because it made the fact that they were together so very real, and it was great. I do think it comes easier to Reggie, and it's a big way of showing how much he cares, so it's important for Juniper to try and show it back because he knows how much it means to the other.
I like the idea of them eventually living with one another, too. I think Juniper would have always had a quiet little daydream of sorts where he does just live a domestic quiet life, and he can with Reggie (well, as close as they can get between the Agency and Zoraxis always being at odds), and he loves that, and he loves him, and it's immense.
I think they cook for one another a lot, it helps Juniper work on his dexterity in a controlled environment, which means a lot because it's a huge point of insecurity (that and his scars). He does improve, and Crane is proud of that and shows it and it's great. I also think they'd probably cook together too, because they can deal with being in the kitchen together and they work well with one another. It's probably a good way for them to unwind because over time they can do it in relative silence.
As I said before, I also think music is a staple in their household, and that Reggie listens to things on vinyl almost all of the time because he likes the background noise. Sometimes Juniper will catch him chuntering along to the music which he finds endlessly endearing. I wouldn't put it past his dramatic ass to also join in to fluster Reggie, but I also don't think Reggie would mind that terribly because Juniper has listened to the music enough to know the lyrics, and that's huge to him.
I don't think they are without rough patches, no relationship is, but I think the good part about them is that they're willing to talk about it (... eventually). They're used to long conversations, and while they're often less fun conversations, they're needed and they know that, and it works out.
Alright. I think I'm done for now. I haven't mentioned everything, but this definitely got the worst of it out of my system. If you ever want to hear any specific thoughts my ask box is open but other than that, behold my general dynamic for these two which has been festering in my head for years. I think they're great
#ty right-agent for explicitly telling me that this would be welcomed you a real one#i had a massive babble to my friend abt what if they all feed me to the hounds for speaking#and he said “girl that fandom is like 12 people big they need you to speak” and yeah that also helped#i have a hard time talking if I'm not asked/prompted to that's why i adding tags is great for me. that and i like the format#anyways.#THESE TWO.............dear lord can you tell I have been unwell abt them forever..#this is propeganda (/j) for them. btw. please you have to understand the potential here. it's so good.#it's slowburn <- my (probably) demiromantic ass cannot handle romance without a build up and this set up is perfect (it will never happen)#also i find it easier to write ANYTHING between these two from Juniper's perspective because i find it easier to get into his head#idk reggie is like the gay version of the: what is he thinking of? i could take a bear in a fight. audio ive heard.#whereas with juniper i have him trapped under a microscope#im going to tag this now so i can use the remaining tags to RANT#ieytd#john juniper#reginald crane#junicrane#starstruck#i expect you to die#<- being BRAVE!!!#when I get really excited i start getting like this internal shaking feeling and uh. yeah this rant started that#the worst part abt that is it also triggers my tourettes so like. double whammy. excited about blorbos? jail :(#but. yeah I uh. yeah. sorry this IS so long..I did warn but . AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHAUUUUUUAHHHHHHHHHHHHH#also i did this rant in 2 parts. last night and this morning so yeah uh. yeah.#god im so messed up about these two#make me a boat by the family crest came on while wroting this and while it's mainly a roxanix song to me......AUUUUUG.....#i struggle to find music for these sillies because they have such a specific vibe to me amd I've not quite managed to find something which -#- genuinely feels correct for them and it drives me up the WALL#GOD NIGHT SHIFT JUST CAME OF SHUFFL.....all my ieytd songs are coming out to drive me up the wall.......#FINISHED I've been adding tags as I've gone alonga#thank you for reading hope you enoyed and if you didn't im sorry
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