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#And I don't feel like it's a conversation we can ever have on here because of the nuance
ravenstargames · 23 hours
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Forced mouse movement is not okay. Ever. Uninstalled and unfollowed. Never do that again.
I want to assume this ask was sent to express discomfort over a feature of the game with somewhat of a good intention. However, it doesn't feel that way.
We weren't going to reply to this initially, but after checking this is not an accessibility issue, we want to use this as a way of reminding people that small developers are not faceless corporations with endless patience and no will to respond to rudeness.
I'd like for you all to keep in mind the way you word things. There's a line between "feedback", "expressing discomfort / disagreement" and whatever this is.
No, you don't get to tell a small creator, artist, developer, how to use their tools. You can express your opinion. You can make suggestions. Small developers want to take care of their audience, because their audience is what allows them to keep working on their games. I'd like to believe every indie developer appreciates and values their audience, and wants to listen to their wants and needs.
However, you don't get to have a say in every little aspect happening in the media you consume. You are absolutely free to have your opinions, express them, have a conversation, and move on. This is not what's happening here.
There was absolutely no need to come to our ask box to say using a narrative element, a tool provided by the engine we use, is "never okay" and to "never do that again". You don't get to decide that. We don't know what response or reaction you were expecting. There is obviously no desire for improvement or dialogue here.
Our demo is free, the content warnings are clear, and the "dark fantasy" and "horror" tags are there. If there's a need to add more content warnings, everyone following us knows they are welcome to inform us about it. I think we've made sure everyone feels comfortable reaching out to us with their opinions since we started publicly working on LiL. Our ask box and our DMs are always open for everyone.
But there will be spooky elements. Agency will be taken away from you. You will feel happy, loved, frustrated, angry, and sad. That's the game we want to make. You can try out the demo, find out you are not comfortable with whatever elements are in it, and decide not to engage any further with it. You will always be free to stop supporting us and our game any time and for whatever reason.
The use of this tool, the forced mouse movement, is justified and adds to the storytelling. We didn't use it deliberately just for the funsies. It shows that there's a higher power trying to control you, and it prepares you for the fact that sometimes this power will be greater than you.
Again, you are absolutely free to uninstall and unfollow, but I advise you not to go to another dev with this much entitlement telling them what to do or how to tell their story this way. You don't like it. It is not made for you. You are not the target audience, and that's completely fine. Curate your space and give some love to the small developers of your favorite games.
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eldrith · 2 days
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omg heyyyyy guys!!! <3 tldr for those of you who aren't the stupid cunt still spewing shit in inboxes: thanks for being kind & supportive and fucking normal. appreciate you beyond words, genuinely. my inbox is always open to you.
but to whom it may concern,
i am so fucking serious when i say that you, anon, need to grow up and start talking to real life humans for once in your life.
this isn't a joke. i'm so so so fucking embarrassed for this imbecile who stalks mutuals and any writer or account with decency in this fandom. you're so embarrassing. you are so clearly out of touch, there is something so clearly wrong in your tiny little pebble brain. it's a miracle you can even type words onto a screen because you're so inconceivably obtuse. (btw, you may need to reel in the extent of your lexicon - if you know what that is - for some of the things im about to say)
not only are you so impossibly, functionally incapable when it comes to media literacy - sorry, literacy at all - but you actively seek out to make incorrect points and its so troublesome... you need to learn context, subtext, implicit bias, nuance - honestly, grab a dictionary and look up what the term 'critical thinking' means too. you are SEVERELY lacking. you are deficient in communication and even worse with inference. i could laugh, and i have before.
despite the fact that this is all fictional - the truth is that we are all just people on here who enjoy writing or maybe enjoy a character from a fictional show that isn't even about romance in the first place.
anyways, i digress: the truth is that every single one of my friends on here has gotten this person's weird fucking obsessive comments in their inbox and as pathetic as this person is, i will say this directly to them: you treat writers or other blogs like some sort of sad therapy and you're being embarrassing.
i'm embarrassed when i see the cringey, out of touch shit you say. you act like a minor. i genuinely think you are one. you act like someone who has never had a personal relationship, let alone conversation. i don't think you've had an emotional connection ever. you act like a fucking baby who just crawled out of a sewer to see light for the first time in your life. it's so fucking sad. i would never care enough to say i feel bad for you, but i feel bad for anyone who has ever interacted with you, myself included.
it's so astounding to have to say this, but: WRITERS AND BLOGGERS ARE NOT YOUR FUCKING THERAPISTS. WE ARE NOT A HOTLINE FOR YOU. here, you’re so stupid you probably didn’t catch that: WE ARE NOT YOUR FUCKING THERAPISTS. YOU ARE BEING A FUCKING CHILD.
i beg you - i implore you to fucking block me, to block all of my mutuals who you come to whining in their inboxes, because NONE OF US FUCKING CARE what you have to say. pick up a book. talk to a man irl. ask someone how their day is and try to use empathy for once.
anyways, i love every single person on here who takes the time to be kind, or funny, or care. i love all my writers, all of my friends on here, moots or not - sorry to say this but im tired of pretending that i'm nice to childish pathetic cunts. lol
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n0tamused · 19 hours
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"Deeds, not words"
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A/n: Finally finished this and tbh I am very proud of how it came out even if I see that I could have done better in certain areas. I prefer the first one better, but tbh I love them both. I have scrambled together a little story to go along with this, although I do have to warn that the details of Jien and Proxy's story, how it really unfolds, is still subject to change. This drabble here is just me exploring ideas of how Proxy can start seeping more and more poison into Jien's life, but we'll see. To anyone that does read it, thank you <3 Mwah.
Contents: Syaoran, a technician of the team of Armed Archeologists, is accompanying Jien to Scalegorge Waterscape at the invite of a High Elder. What waits for them there is no warm welcome.
There is an odd tension in the air, so ill it made him sick. Scalegorge Waterscape had towering walls of water all around, and it felt as if they were ready to swallow him at any moment, the sky above being the only solace. The air was still with the smell of salt, and there was a quiet sound. Like the one a dog made before it growled. 
Miss YueXia didn’t budge, and Syaoran judged it was because she was from these parts. Perhaps she felt at home even, but whether that was good or bad didn’t have space in their conversation with the Elder before them. And now he could sense that feeling of anger from Jien, he only wished he could see her face from where he stood, a step behind her. Did she look angry? Or was it that cold expression she once served the team after that messed up expedition?
“We have welcomed you into our fold and treated you as our own. Yet our eyes have reported your face sneaking about in the night around the Luofu, sowing suspicions and spreading gossip. Is this your way to show gratitude, YueXia?”
The Elder looked at Jien with cold suspicious eyes. 
“High Elder, while I appreciate your invitation to meet me I fail to see how or why I would do such things, especially since I have not been on the Luofu in almost a year” she replied, cold and even tone, yet there was an unmistakable tinge of some need below it all - a need to make things right. A flicker of a flame. 
“Moreover, I have never wished you or the people of Luofu any ill will and I have always advocated for the safety of the civilians as much as a Cloud Knight. Did you bring me here to confront me for something another has done?”
“Another?” the Elder bristled, arrogance rolling off of him like a cloak. “I have seen it myself, this ‘another’ was you. I saw your face in the darkness. And you dare lie to my face? The Disciples of Sanctus Medicus have been on the prowl and you with them. I knew the IPC wishes to get their clutches on the Vidyadhara, but I refused to believe you would aid in such a goal”
That is not true, Syaoran wanted to say, feeling his face twist in displeasure. Jien was against the Abundance, against the Disciples, the whole team knew, but even if she wasn’t - her team was. Syaoran knew Kaiya had a burning hatred for the Abundance and his wife was from the Xianzhou Yaoqing. He’d be the first to jump against any idea of Jien bringing any harm to Xianzhou Luofu, but everyone knew she’d sooner go mad than think of such schemes. 
“Do you know how many you’ve hurt with your doings? And you wish to say my eyes are deceiving me as well?” 
Jien’s eyes fell dark and darker still, her jaw stiff as she ground her teeth together, listening to the Elder talk without interrupting him.
“I meant no insult when I previously said you were mistaken in your assertion, but now you are accusing me and my team of inexcusable crimes and I will not tolerate such” Her tail brushed against the cold stone, pale and gnawed away by sea and time. “High Elder, I can assure you I had no chance to do such things, even if I had the plan to ever harm you and the people, which I remind you again - I never did and never will do. I was half a cosmos away. Do you propose I have, perhaps, cloned myself? I pray you don't jest, High Elder, and listen to what I have to say. Who you saw was not me, I swear on my life..” Jien put her hand over her heart to show her sincerity as the seams of her silence began to tighten and break. 
The Elder Syaoran couldn’t remember the name of frowned deeply at her words, distrust swimming in his eyes, body taut as a bow string. “And you propose I believe you over the reports of countless others?” 
“I cannot force you to put those reports aside and trust my word alone, but I hope the eyewitnesses of my team, as well as camera surveillance and date records of my passage through the cosmos can be proof enough to you and so many others that are holding the belief that I or any of my team have committed these crimes. I am more than willing to bring them all over here, to you, as soon as morning comes if that would let your mind let go of these beliefs” Jien sighed and shook her head a moment later. “Although, I do fail to see - if these crimes are so severe, I would have expected someone else to come and question me about them..” there was a mild insult interlaced between her words and tone, so skillfully that not even the Elder before her could point it out without sounding mad.
He only exhales a long breath through his nose. “You will be questioned by the Ten-lords Commission” he said, tone resolute. Syaoran could see Jien move her hands behind her back, her fingers forming into a fist. Somthing told Syaoran that the High Elder came to this decision on the spot.. “The evidence is overwhelming and not in your favor. But I will give you until morning to bring your evidence to us, and we’ll take it from there”
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spaceorphan18 · 1 day
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The Lady Whistledown Papers : 1x07 Ocean's Apart (Part 3)
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Welcome back, Gentle Readers, to The Lady Whistledown Papers, where I’m taking an in-depth look at Penelope Featherington and Colin Bridgerton’s character arcs and romance within the show Bridgerton!
For previous issues, follow tag : The Lady Whistledown Papers
The Queen's Luncheon
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The family is back together again (except, you know, for Francesca, but who's really paying attention....) Violet seems genuinely happy to be out in society with 7/8ths of her children.
Colin snarks that they should tempt scandal more often -- and I mean, he might be in a pissy mood, but I appreciate he hasn't lost his sense of humor.
I don't really ever get to talk about Lady Danbury, but she has a moment where she talks to Daphne about how her plan of showing up and, idk, being there? is helping no one talk about Colin and Marina. Sure. Okay. I still don't really get these society rules. But if Daphne is now the A-List celebrity kicking the c-tier out of the tabloids, then okay. Lol but mostly, I just like Lady Danbury and wanted to say that.
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It is twenty minutes into the episode and this is our first bit of Penelope. And look how gorgeous this girl is, my god. She's got such a beautiful smile.
Anyway... not a long scene, but there are some key elements going on.
For one, the Featheringtons have caused quite a stir showing up. Ooff, the ton is not happy about them trying to foist a pregnant girl onto a Bridgerton. The nerve.
Secondly, Eloise whisks Penelope away -- it's nice that they're friends again. I love that Eloise is so concerned for her, and wants to make sure Penelope is okay, and there's this real moment of care and affection from Eloise to Pen. Eloise is so caught up in Eloise-land half the time that she doesn't always notice what's going on with Penelope, but she does still very much care.
Pen is good about it -- and (unsurprisingly) only concerned about Colin and how he's doing. (It's like she cares about him or something, idk...;) ) And it's fascinating at how dismissive Eloise is of it -- saying his ego's bruised, but the men are usually fine in this. And, I mean, she's not wrong. Look - I'm not downplaying Colin or his right to have feelings, because I think he should have feelings, and it's good that -- unlike so many other men in this universe, he expresses those feelings.
But I can also see it from Eloise's POV, too -- Colin is the one who, from a society perspective, gets off the easiest here. He will be fine, he's protected by his gender and by his family name. Whereas the Featheringtons, who are already somewhat outcasts to begin with, are bearing some truly awful treatment from society.
And then we get into Lady Whistledown, and I always love these conversations, because there's always another layer once you know that Penelope is LW. Eloise reports that people think she's gone too far this time -- and Pen looks away, because she knows it was a risky thing doing what she did. But interestingly, she reminds Eloise that Eloise was once LW's biggest admirer.
And Eloise really steps into her friendship, saying that LW has gone too far when she smears the name of her greatest friend. And Pen is genuinely moved by this. And Eloise also promises that when they find out LW's identity - a retraction will be made, and they'll restore the Featherington name. And Pen is just - she's so happy that Eloise is so dear to her. It's really heartwarming when these two can have such beautiful moments together.
Meanwhile, The Featheringtons are going to get kicked out of the luncheon. Ooff.
Cressida is going to be snarky about it - but Daphne puts her in her place, and really she should learn not to fuck with the Featheringtons (or the Bridgertons) because it will not end well for her.
[I should also point out - the Marina storyline takes a detour with Daphne getting involved to find George Crane. It's nice that the two storylines converge at this point, but neither Colin or Pen are involved at this particular point, so I'm skipping over it.]
Searching for Lady Whistledown
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One storyline that I've mostly been neglecting to talk about (and is probably my favorite Season 1 storyline) is Eloise searching for Lady Whistledown. She's gotten in so deep that she's been asked by the Queen to track her down, and the Queen is now threatening Eloise if she doesn't start giving results, so Eloise is pushing all in on it.
Of course, now that she and Pen are doing alright again (interesting their little tiff in episode 5? goes unspoken about -- but I mean, they're such great friends that sometimes you get into fights and let it go because the friendship means more, you know?)
Anyway, Eloise has enlisted Pen's help in going over all the data... (which is kind of funny - as Pen is just enjoying herself watching Eloise spin in circles while the culprit is sitting right there!)
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It's clever, really, the Penelope can give so much and so little away at the same time. She managed to not have the whole Marina thing tracked back to her -- shifting the focus onto the servants who (as we saw early on in the series) all gossip. Eloise has ruled out servants, but who isn't ruled out? Tradespeople! So there are new leads and new possibilities!
Also, the end of this scene is... odd, in that all it's really doing is setting up Eloise going to an opera, even though she's not out. I mean, the only reason Pen says what she says is to get Eloise to go be in the next scene so that Eloise can have a scene with the Queen. It's... a tiny bit awkward. But eh, I guess I'll just throw it to - Penelope wanting Eloise to enjoy being in society, since she's already stuck there.
And then the ending of the scene, where Penelope is meh about restoring the family name (I mean, the girl knows her family is a mess even without scandal) and laments having to sneak out the back way so not to be scene. (The amount of times this girl sneaks in and out of this house, I mean really...ten bucks says she sneaks past Colin's room on her way out.)
But anyway, on her way out, she does thank Eloise. She really is grateful to have such a great friend. And even if she knows that LW really can't be revealed, at least she has satisfaction in knowing there is at least one person in the world who truly cares about her and her well being.
[Also, as an aside, towards the end of the episode - Eloise is going to reflect on this conversation, and in kind of a brilliant misdirection, she's going to come up with the idea that Madame Delacroix could be LW.]
An Apology
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Another Colin and Anthony scene! And you know what, I know. I know I know I know that this show is supposed to be about the romances, and I mean, I cannot wait to get to season 3 and really dig into Pen and Colin, we'll get there.
But I adore the sibling scenes. I really do. It's a big draw for me. And I just don't think there are enough ABC brother scenes in general. (God, I hope there are more in Season 4...anyway...) This little scene is a just a really nice mirror to the scene where Anthony reprimanded Colin a couple episodes earlier.
What is Colin up to at the beginning of this scene? It looks like a map? Colin is going to spend his evening bunkering down and really getting his travel plans in order, because now that he has no reason to stay, there's nothing holding him back from going...
Here's the thing about Colin and traveling. I do genuinely think, as a part of his personality, that he does enjoy the idea behind traveling - of seeing the world and seeing what's out there. But I think a big component to Colin's travels is that he is looking for something. What is that thing? His purpose? His place in this world? His reason for being? The answers to life's greatest mysteries? All of the above?
He is the third son -- Anthony has role as leader of the family and his duties to the Bridgerton estate. Benedict is the 'spare' but also is finding himself through artistic pursuits. Colin doesn't have the weight of responsibility on his shoulders. But so he is looking elsewhere to give his life some meaning.
The somewhat funny thing about Colin traveling, though, is what he's searching for is right where he left it. He just doesn't know it yet.
But! I do think traveling (both times) is really good for him. Seeing the world does open it up, and gives you new experiences, and lets you see the world in ways you've never seen it before. And (in both cases) it's going to help him grow up a bit. (It's also going to give him the opportunity to really fall in love again -- but he also doesn't know that yet...)
Here's the other thing about this moment... Colin isn't going to the concert because he isn't feeling up to it. He's still very much in his feelings, and when Colin is in his feelings, he retreats. Big time. (It is another reason he's traveling, too, to make an escape.) Not that he shouldn't be, his heart has been very much shattered and things like that do need time to get over.
But it's just another character trait that has been firmly set up in this season that's going to end up magnified in Season 3.
And, omg, I've barely gotten into the scene, lol...
Anthony hands over an apology drink (lol) and Colin starts getting snarky again - locusts in the street? is it the endtimes? what is happening?? Again - I love that Colin retains a sense of humor and a bit of sass. The boy may be wallowing, but he hasn't lost his cheekiness that gives him his charm.
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Anthony, to his credit, doubles down on a sincere apology. And Colin becomes self deprecating again -- acknowledging that Anthony was trying to 'protect' him from his foolishness. (And Colin does seem to recognize that jumping so quickly into an engagement was somewhat foolish, even if it's going to take him a while to really get over Marina.)
And I love Anthony's banter back -- ribbing Colin about being foolish. Because it's such a sibling response. And there little banter back and forth -- again such siblingness! And I love it. Love that this show doesn't back away from balancing sincerity with levity and the push and pull that comes with real sibling dynamics.
And then Anthony becomes somewhat prophetic. He's speaking to Colin as if he was speaking to himself, saying that a broken heart will indeed mend, and at some point in the future, you'll barely remember her name. Because Anthony is in the same place Colin is -- nursing his hurt over Siena, and it occupies all of his thoughts. But pretty soon, we'll be in Season 2, and Anthony will discover Kate. And Colin will travel and (somewhat unknowingly) start a correspondence with his future wife. And the names Siena and Marina will be flickering memories of things that seem odd were once a big deal.
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The other thing that Anthony does is such a sweet, big brother thing -- he reaffirms that, in the wake of it all, reassure Colin that his family loves him. Which is a big deal - because not everyone (as we'll see) will have families to rely on, but the Bridgertons are a unit, one that unconditionally supports each other, and that's a huge thing.
He also minds Colin that he has the honor of his actions. Which is an important thing to Colin. He has Anthony's respect and that means something.
The scene ends with Colin's empathetic side (as shown through brotherly teasing) coming out -- as Colin asks Anthony how is own advice is working. They may have not directly discussed it, but Colin must know about Siena, and must know that Anthony is also in pain. Anthony doesn't know how it'll play out... but we do, as we know what's coming :D
As we're nearing the end of the season this scene is most definitely setting up the future for our characters, a laying the ground work that even if these story lines are coming to a close, better things are most definitely on the horizon.
[Also - I kind of enjoy the fact that these two are going to spend the evening drinking and being miserable together. Kinda wished we got to see these shenanigans more so than the Simon/Daphne drama, but ah, I suppose that's what fanfic is for]
A Special Cocktail
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The episode is going to end with Marina making herself a special potion -- of what? We won't know until the next episode. And Penelope is going to find her! Oh no, the drama! I do like how much Penelope cares, though. Even though they've done nothing between Penelope and Marina since their last exchange where Marina was a bit cruel to her, Penelope doesn't want her dead. And does want her to be okay.
Anyway, it's so weird not to have Penelope featured that much in the episode -- she was barely in it, and her story line didn't really progress at all.
But - with this (and Daphne's dramatic reveal of not being pregnant), we're crashing into the finale!
[Also, huh, it is fascinating that they're paralleling Daphne and Marina's storylines here -- both women wish for the opposite - Daphne wishing she was pregnant, Marina wishing she wasn't, and neither are getting their wish. It's some good storytelling technique here. Shame I don't necessarily care about either of these stories that much. But I can appreciate good storytelling when it's happening. Bravo show, bravo.]
On to episode 8! Whooo! (I'm happy - I'm so ready to move beyond season 1)
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yesterdayiwrote · 2 months
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For someone who's so thoughtful when he speaks, Lewis really does still give some absolutely terrible quotes when he's talking to journalists...
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street-corner-felines · 2 months
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Zero Day Director commentary - With actor Andre Keuck
#movies#film#cinema#Damn I wish Cal was here#Andre and Ben are really interesting to listen to#This movie is one of those movies where it needs like 3 commentaries#It needs one with just Ben Coccio by himself#then one with Cal and Andre by themselves#then another with all 3 of them#Not all movies do that but I love when studios/filmmakers have multiple commentaries to create a sense of thorough intimacy#due to the nature of how commentaries are set up they can be quite restrictive/pressing/limited with no pauses or rewinds.#so I find cast/crew don't have enough time or able to present how they would like to if they could edit/rewind or pause for fluent presenta#So I love when they have director commentaries and actor commentaries or composer commentaries#Platoon's dvd extras are so dope they got multiple commentaries and one with military adviser Dale Dye who was a RL vietnam vet#Or Hostel's commentaries where one is just Eli Roth and another is Tarantino and Eli Roth with Scott Spiegal#idk if Zero Day ever got a blu-ray release but I think it should but the DV technology of the camera is kinda at it's limit of resolution#but an AI upscaling with 20 years later retrospective with Ben Cal and Andre would be sooo dope along with updated commentaries#Every few years I always rewatch Zero Day so that time has come that last few days lol#Ever since Columbine as a lil kid I have always been into spree-murders and active shooter incidents#I remember reading a peer-reviewed paper called Pseudo-Commandos#And Eric and Dylan and Andre and Cal would be dubbed Pseudo-Commandos where they dress up in a semi-military fashion#and have a delusion of superiority mixed with perceived sense of persecution whether it's true or not#it went into the Postal shooter from the 80s as well and what he went through along#plus I read another book called Going Postal which also went into postal shootings along with school shootings#I want to make a film about spree murders or an active shooter/s but I remember just getting so tired of the subject matter#because every 3 weeks there was some new shooter in the headlines and I found myself not wanting to be exploitative#When I write/direct my film I'd like it to address and study the character of such an individual but not try to be too political#or exploitative and focus on the ambiguities that are left behind when someone does this#as a society I noticed we stopped asking the questions on why and stopped having constructive conversations#it feels like as a coping mechanism we've started treating them like tornados or natural disasters
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nexus-nebulae · 3 months
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it's so dumb that we still feel awkward about creating willogenic headmates in our sys when we literally found out we were plural through the tulpa community
#SYSCOURSE GET BLOCKED AND EXPLODED 💥#endo safe#tulpa safe#but like we figured out we had an actual disassociative disorder through that community#because when we first started 'creating' headmates and talking about it in the community#everyone was like 'yea its... not usually normal for tulpas to form so completely THAT fast??? especially multiple at once???'#'its not really normal to be SURPRISED by a 'new tulpa'? like... the whole thing is you have to put in effort to create them?'#when we started tulpamancy we basically had a cambrian explosion of headmates like we went from Cecil alone to 14 all at once#(and we have confirmation that Cecil did not arrive alone. his arrival (or reveal) was ANNOUNCED by A DIFFERENT GUY)#literally the conversation was just#ruby: why am i getting intrusive thoughts rn#sheo; not making himself known: it's cecils fault#ruby: WHOS CECIL?????#cecil: hi thats me#we talked about how cecil basically formed by himself (blank as well) and everyone was like... bestie that might not be a tulpa....#they were really kind abt it though i happened to be in a nice group#anyway all that backstory aside we keep wanting a headmate of a specific concept but keep feeling weird about making them from scratch#cause like. years and years ago. we ran away from home once and. well let's just say we did not intend to be found with a pulse#and like. we were texting our friends while walking and they weren't able to convince us to go home at all we were. very not ok#and i had to put away my phone bc it started raining so i kept walking for a bit and then just. stopped#bc in the middle of the road there was just. a single solitary bright red salamander. just standin there#and i just. i don't even know. i broke a little? i was just overwhelmed with the wonder of nature and life and coincidence?#I've literally only ever seen two salamanders in my entire life. one that i caught under a bush and wanted to keep as a pet but was told no#and that little fire red salamander in the middle of the road#and i genuinely think if i had not stopped to look at that salamander i would not have gone home#and i want. to have a salamander headmate that can be there for comfort and stuff#if we ever get a tattoo we're definitely getting a salamander one as our first one#maybe mixed with a semicolon bc the salamander is like. symbolizing the same thing for me#the 'i fucking made it. im still here' kind of vibes
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captainkurosolaire · 2 years
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I've told you this before but you are an inspiration to me to keep going when I'm lost in the darkness. You're apologetically you and I admire that a lot. You're passionate about your projects and I will always be your biggest cheerleader to see you through to the end of Captain's story.
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ANONYMOUSLY TELL ME YOUR HONEST OPINION ABOUT ME. I CAN’T REPLY, JUST PUBLISH.
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girlscience · 3 months
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the adrenaline rush after talking to someone who gives you severe anxiety but the conversation went super well and was super helpful: unparalleled
#yes this is about my grad advisor#yes I knew he gave me anxiety before I joined his program#yes he has given me a huge number of stress dreams since taking ecology lab with him in undergrad#it's okay!!!! it's totally fine and facing your fears by forcing yourself to be in proximity to the stressful thing is like healthy and shit#right????#(he isn't creepy or whatever he just constantly seems disappointed in you lmao and it freaks me out 😅😂)#anyway I have been super worried about figuring out my grad project/thesis#and he basically just told me I don't even need a direction to head yet#I have time to figure it out. around august I need to have some idea of like lakes or rivers or streams#maybe an idea of if i want to do some kind of management or conservation question#what I'd like to work with. historical data. ecological catastrophe data. habitat data. how are invasive species affecting communities data.#and so on and so forth and then we can develop a question together that I can work on for the next two years#he just wants me to learn right now and he thinks by next year he wants me running LTEF which would be cool as fuck#and I am so here for#ANYWAY I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER#I actually was unable to sleep last night because I was so worried about this#was going 'maybe I should quit now cause I don't know anything and I will never know anything and idk what I'm doing'#and like 'this was a mistake and I'm letting everyone and myself down and I can't undo it and I moved and everything'#'and now I'm going to completely bomb and drop out and never get another job and I'll have to go live in the woods'#'and never speak to anyone ever again because I'm a failure'#BUT I HAVE NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT#YAYYYYYYYYYY#anxiety can eat my ass!!!! I can conquer any problem!!!!! nothing can stop me!!!!#(also the fact I held a whole conversation with him by myself with no one else around is something I am proud of)#(and by the end my heart wasn't even pounding or anything 😌)
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channwie · 7 months
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💭 13.02.24
#about poverty. . .#‧₊ ⊹ ( 💭 ) my thoughts .#— on queue .ᐟ#i grew up poor (still am)#but i would never outwardly say that as it felt disrespectful to my parents who tried their best#but i think we don't speak about the inner hatred that comes with living like that#as a kid i hated myself for not being able to host sleepovers or try certain foods or go places#i never had a room for myself in the years i've been on this planet#my room*** that i have now is not mine alone#but i was blessed to have parents who give me freedom and stretch themselves thin to ensure i don't feel lesser than in certain aspects#but the inner hatred is something i think won't ever go away? i had a conversation with my sister about this since tmr is valentines day but#there is always that lingering jealousy or hatred of myself when i see someone can freely indulge in their interests and spend money—#—on those things#especially growing up in the caribbean where poverty is the backbone of our society#i have never and probably will never be able to indulge in things i enjoy due to that#and while i am grateful#a certain sense of fomo and sadness comes with that#i could speak about the issues this has on mental health but i digress#and some people living here have it way worse than me#i feel mean and struggle with how to relate to some of my peers or online friends because of this#and sometimes they'll complain about things that stump me and make me internally feel like shit#but i think it's okay to feel bad for being ''poor''#i dont like to say im poor because my family has gone beyond themselves for me again im saying it#but still#these are just my thoughts
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reunion
Pairing: Art Donaldson x Reader
Rating: Explicit - 18+ only. minors, please get off my lawn.
Notes: Not beta-read because when is it ever.
Length: 4.5K
Warnings: Slow burn; unrequited love; angst; yearning; divorced Art Donaldson; oral sex (female receiving); vaginal sex; safe sex
Summary: It wasn't that Art Donaldson was the one that got away. It was more like Art Donaldson was the one that never really knew you existed.
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"Did you hear Art Donaldson is supposed to be here?"
The question is whispered behind you and makes your hand freeze in its signing. You're half-bent over the table at reception, fingers tight around a pen as your mind is jogged.
No way was he turning up, that's what Anne had said.
Tashi will be there, she's the head of the goddamn reunion committee, the ink is still wet on their divorce—that's what Anne had said. Hell, she'd sworn it.
So what the hell is he doing here?
The sound of your name jogs your attention and you manage to finish signing in. You straighten, taking up your name tag and haphazardly slapping the adhesive onto your top. You need a drink, and quickly. You're halfway to the bar before you feel someone wind their arm through yours.
"Okay, I know you didn't wanna come—"
"Anne."
"And I so appreciate you being here so that I didn't have to come alone—"
"Anne—"
"But I got some news and it's going to be a little shocking so I think you should hear it from me—"
"I know he's here."
"What?" Anne freezes, her arm dropping from yours. You turn to see her looking stricken, her cheeks pinking with panic and embarrassment. You sigh softly, glancing around your fellow alumni. Less than half of them look familiar; your eyes catch on the odd face before you realize that you're inadvertently looking for him.
"Look, there are, like...Five hundred people here, alright?" You add. "I probably won't even see him."
"We can go."
"Look, we made the trip, we're here, we may as well stay. It's fine, okay? We're all adults here! It doesn't matter!" Your insistence is chased by a slightly hysterical laugh. "It was, like, a hundred years ago."
"...You're sure?"
"I am positive."
Positive that you need a drink, and positive that you're going to regret agreeing to stay.
--
It wasn't that Art Donaldson was the one that got away. It was more like Art Donaldson was the one that never really knew you existed.
You were friends, sure. You palled around, had a few classes together, hung out at a few parties—but he was so in love with Tashi Duncan that you'd never made his romantic radar. You'd forced yourself to believe that that was for the best, that you didn't need his love or romantic validation to be happy. But you couldn't pretend that wanting him didn't sting.
He'd had a couple of girlfriends while you were at Stanford, but you could always feel, always see that they were never really his priority. It was Tashi, then tennis, then them.
The two of you had kept touch a little after college, but you'd pushed yourself to move on. Conversation had begun to fade, and when he hadn't tried to keep it up, you had resolved to let him go.
You'd avoided his name in the news as much as you can, but it had been hard. He was on billboards, packaging, tv—it was like you couldn't escape him.
Want melted to sadness; sadness shifted to annoyance; annoyance hardened into disdain. You couldn't see his likeness or hear his name without rolling your eyes. It wasn't his fault, of course, but the prospect of running into Art fuckin' Donaldson made you queasy.
Still, you put on a brave face for Anne, forcing your focus into conversation.
It's a struggle to keep your gaze from seeking him out. You take each sip with a little white lie, convincing yourself that you're looking to make sure you can avoid contact. You spot Tashi a couple of times, but you don't go out of your way to say hello. She's surrounded by a cloud of people—taking pictures, signing programs and name tags and old Duncanator shirts.
When Anne insists on going to say hello, you force a small smile.
"You, um—you go ahead," You nod, taking a couple of steps back. "I'm gonna get some air."
Anne's dark eyes flit over you questioningly before she blessedly lets it go, nodding and going on her way. You turn, swiping a fresh drink off of a passing waiter's tray as you leave.
It takes a few moments for the buzz of conversation to clear from your head. You take a gulp of the prosecco, wrinkling your nose. It's a little sweeter than you usually like, and doesn't mingle well with the three other drinks that you've downed. Tashi's not going to find your lack of presence or greeting conspicuous; you'd been cordial and on speaking terms in college, but the two of you had never been close.
Damn, but it's chillier outside than you thought it would be. The reception had been so warm, so crammed with people. Paired your head being near-permanently on a swivel, you hadn't realize how hot and tense you'd been.
You frown at the waft of cigarette smoke that catches your nose. Who the hell is still smoking in this day and age—
"Are you hiding, too?"
Maybe you can feign that you didn't hear him—that the sound of his voice didn't jog a hundred memories and trigger a flurry of butterflies. But before you can stop yourself, you turn, the words, "I thought you quit smoking," tumbling out of your mouth.
Art's smile widens as he draw the cigarette back from his lips, a stream of smoke pushed out of the side of his mouth.
"I did. Quit quitting, though." He takes one more puff before he flicks it away, drifting closer. "Hi."
Hi, like it's not the first time you've seen him in the better part of a decade. Hi, like neither of you are oceans from where you where when you last saw one another.
"Hi," You manage. He doesn't hesitate to draw you into his arms; he seems to almost do it without thinking. You only allow yourself a moment of resistance before you raise and curl your arms around him. The clean scent of his pressed jacket and woodsy cologne are muddled with smoke. The fingers of one if your hands curls covetously in the fabric of his jacket as his palms smooth gently over your back. You hear him draw in a deep breath, feel him hold it, and then release it with a soft hum.
"How the hell are you?"
Probably better than you are these days.
You shrug a little, mumbling, "Fine."
He draws away, eyes skating across your face.
"You don't sound so sure about that."
"I'm sure."
"Yeah?"
"Mhm."
You can feel him winding up for another pass at it, but you hold your glass out before he can. His fingers brush against yours as he drains it.
"Why are you hiding?" You ask. He shrugs, nods toward the door.
"It's a lot in there. I forgot what these events are like."
"People wanna congratulate you. They're proud."
"Are you?"
"I am, but I'll hold off. Don't wanna crowd you."
Your attention is drawn from Art's smile as you hear someone clearing their throat over the speaker system inside:
"If we could have the reunion chairpersons to the stage, please!"
You glance toward Art and find him fidgeting, his thumb smoothing across his bare ring finger.
"…Do you wanna go back in?" You offer. He considers before he says, "Wait here."
You watch curiously as he darts inside, and are stunned when he reappears a moment later. You just barely catch a glimpse of the bottle of champagne clenched in his fist before he rests his other hand on your lower back, steering you away with an urgent murmur of, "C'mon."
--
"I'm surprised you came," You tell him. Art doesn't look at you for a moment, and you take the chance to lean back against the hard plastic seat. He's as beautiful as he was the last time the two of you were together, the night before graduation—practically in the same seats. You don't know if he was thinking about that when he'd led the way into the stands, chosen where to sit. Maybe it was pure muscle-memory.
Either way, you don't know how long the two of you have been sitting out there, knees bumping, passing the bottle back and forth. You take in his profile—the slope of his nose and cut of his jaw; the bob of his adam's apple as he swallows.
"My therapist said it would be good," He finally admits. "Told me I needed to get out more, start getting back into events, work at the foundation...What about you, huh?" He turns, brows raising. "You always told me that you hated this stuff."
You're surprised he remembers.
"I do hate this stuff, but," You shrug. "Anne didn't want to come alone."
"You're a good friend. I never forgot that." He sits up and passes the bottle back to you. "What happened to us, huh?"
"What do you mean?"
"Why did we stop talking?"
I couldn't keep begging for scraps of attention.
"I don't know," You deflect. "Guess we just lost touch. It happens."
"I shouldn't have let it happen to us."
You look down at the bottle, sweeping your finger across a slipping drop of condensation.
"You were busy."
"You weren't?"
"Not in the same way," You laugh self-consciously.
"What were you busy with then, huh?" He shifts, thigh pressing against yours. "You used to always say you'd uh—burn out by twenty-six."
"Yeah."
"Did you?"
"Oh, it didn't take nearly that long."
"What!" He laughs. "What the hell happened?"
"I don't know what to tell you, man. A girl can only take a soul-sucking marketing job for so long."
"So what do you do now?"
"Still in marketing, but I'm a manager, so. Still soul-sucking, but making a little more money."
"You like it?"
"God no, but I don't know what else I would do." You pass the bottle back.
"Could find something for you at the foundation."
You wrinkle your nose, shaking your head as Art sputters a laugh, asks, "What?"
"Don't do that, Art."
"Don't do what?"
"I don't need, you know—"
"We could use you—"
"You don't even know what I do at work."
"I bet it's great—"
"You don't even know if I'm a good worker—"
"Sure I do, I know you."
"No, you don't!"
You know it's a mistake the second it leaves your mouth. Art's smile wavers as he leans away again.
"I just mean—" You try.
"I know what you mean. It's been a long time."
"...Yeah, it has." You take the bottle back, drawing deeply from it before passing it back. "I should get going. I'm sure Anne's looking for me."
"Sure."
You don't say goodbye or tell him that it was nice to see him. You just make as hasty a retreat as you can without tripping over your feet.
--
@ a_donaldsonofficial requested to follow you. 3h
You're not sure what surprises you more—the follow request or the message in your DMs: Dinner?
--
His groan is sinful and low, and makes you rethink ever losing contact with the guy. Under the warm glow of the diner's lights, his eyes slip shut, fingers tightening around the bun.
"...When's the last time you had a burger?" You finally manage to ask.
"I can't remember." He admits it through the mouthful, and you don't begrudge him the couple of flecks of food that land on the table. You smile, plucking up a couple of fries.
"Art?"
"Mm."
"Why'd you ask me to dinner?"
Art sets the burger down as he swallows, taking off his napkin to clean off his hands.
"I was thinking...About what you said at the reunion."
"Mhm."
"About me not knowing you. You're right. But you know what?" He presses on before you can process your surprise. "I don't think you know me, either."
You think for a moment, brows furrowing. He's right. You know the image of Art Donaldson that's been projected to you over the years—on tv screens, in magazines, in online clips.
"...I don't think I do," You agree.
"Figured we should fix that. Catch up, fill each other in on what we've missed."
"Okay."
"So, after college..." He trails off, waving his hand. "Fill me in."
"Moved to New York."
"Uh-huh."
"Working in marketing."
"Burned out before 26—"
"Yeah, hit my capitalistic peak at 23."
"That fast?"
"I mean, that's the last time I remember giving a shit about work, so. Yeah."
"Relationships?"
"...A couple," You admit.
"Serious?"
"Yeah. One."
"Married?"
"No. Engaged." His eyes drop to your bare left hand, and you hurriedly tuck it into your lap. "Formerly engaged."
"What happened?"
"It just didn't feel right. I don't think either of us were ready."
"...Was it anyone I knew? I don't remember you dating much at school."
"Guess I didn't."
"You weren't shy."
"Well no, but—"
"So what was it?"
"I had the worst crush on you, dude!" It's another mistake, but where the last one seemed to make Art retreat, this one leaves his gobsmacked. His eyes widen, mouth opening in a wide smile.
"You what?"
"Oh, kay, you know what—"
"I had no idea!"
"I was very subtle."
Art leans back in the diner booth, watching you openly. You can see the gears turning in his head, and you wonder what he may be remembering, holding up and twisting about in this new light.
"...Huh," He mutters.
"You can feel free to forget that at any time."
"I don't think I will...I wish I'd known."
You consider for a moment before you shrug. "I don't know. I'm kinda glad that you didn't."
"Really?" His brows knit with confusion. "Why?"
"I don't like coming second, Art."
Art nods slowly, and you see something tight pass across his face before it's smoothed away again.
"You know what?" He smiles bitterly. "Neither do I."
You nod toward his plate.
"Your burger's getting cold."
--
"So, uh..." Art clears his throat as the two of you take slow, drifting steps to your car. "I'm gonna say two things, and I don't want you to think that they've got anything to do with what you said earlier."
You know exactly what he means, but you just grumble, "I said a lot of things earlier."
"I think we both know which one I'm talking about."
"Uh-huh. So what's up?"
"...I wanna see you again."
"Okay."
"But things are a little...Messy right now. Tashi and I are working on getting Lily into a regular rhythm and it's harder than we thought it would be."
You lean back against your car, tucking your hands into your pockets.
"Mhm...I hesitate to ask."
"Yeah."
"How does this have to do with what I said earlier?"
"I just don't want you to think that this is—"
"A consolation prize?"
"Something like that."
"Whatever you need to do to get in a good place with Lily is fine, Art, you don't need to justify that to me."
"Even if it means you come second?"
You tip your head to the side, pursing your lips. "It's different when it's your kid. I meant that I didn't want to be second to—You know."
"...Yeah," He mutters, looking at his feet as he takes another foot forward. "And for the record, I was thinking of asking you out again by the time we sat down."
"You could've changed your mind."
"I didn't. And I don't want to."
You smile, nodding. "Well I don't want you to, either." You straighten up as you fish into your bag for your keys. "Call me the next time you're in New York."
"Sure."
You reach out, cupping his cheek and leaning in, pecking his cheek. You pull away, smiling at the flush creeping across his face.
"Goodnight, Art."
"Night."
--
It isn't easy at first. Messages are far and few, mostly how are yous and how was your days. You think that as nice as the little swell of contact has been, that's all it'll be—but the two of you both start to really try. The odd text becomes the weekly phone call. Weekly phone calls become daily FaceTimes. On the nights when he has Lily, they're late, usually when you're getting ready for bed. On the nights when he's on his own, the two of you eat dinner together and chat over your calls. It isn't always perfect, but it's more than you could've anticipated from that dinner a couple of months ago.
--
"She down?"
"Yeah."
"Are you in a hotel again?"
"...Yeah." Art seems to admit it grudgingly, and you smile a little as you take up your toner and a cotton pad.
"There's nothing wrong with leaning into it if it's working," You argue. "And not to be that bitch, but you're not exactly broke."
"Might be if she keeps ordering room service and movies on-demand."
You laugh softly, turning your attention to your reflection as you swipe the toner across your face.
"How's your day been?" Art asks.
"Fine, standard. I had to fill out an assessment ahead of my annual review."
"When's that?"
"End of the week."
"How do you feel about it?"
"Mm," You shrug reaching for a serum. "Fine, I guess. I'm doing okay, my team's hitting their targets."
"You're doing better than okay."
"Art."
"You are."
"Well. Thank you for that." You glance over as he goes quiet, catching a glimpse of him as you smooth the serum into your skin. You raise your brows at the sight of his gentle, warm smile. "What is it?"
"You're beautiful."
Your face goes warm at the compliment, and you bite the inside of your cheek to tamp down your wide, idiotic smile.
"You are tired, huh," You deflect.
"I mean it."
"...I know," You murmur, reaching for your moisturizer. "Tell me what you got up to today."
"I had a meeting at the foundation. We're starting planning for the gala."
"Oh yeah? Have you done them before?"
"We've had three before, but I was usually playing or training, so I haven't been as involved in the planning."
"How's it been?"
"We're still in the preliminary stages, but it's been interesting, you know, seeing how the pieces come together before I usually see them."
You nod, picking the phone up from the mirror holder and heading into your bedroom.
"Where are you gonna have it?"
"We're still scouting locations...As a matter of fact," Art adds, "We're considering a few in New York."
"Oh?"
"I'll be down there for at least a few days, and I wanna see you."
You grin bashfully as you climb into bed, settling against your pillows.
"I wanna see you, too. Are you gonna, um—I mean, is Lily gonna be with you?"
"No, it'll be Tashi's weekend."
"Okay, cool. Just wanna make sure I don't mess up your time."
"I appreciate that." Art's tongue swipes across his lower lip, eyes sweeping across your face. "I gotta say..."
"Mmm?"
"I'm looking forward to seeing your apartment."
"Oh, really?" You chuckle. "Why's that?"
"It'll be interesting, that's all. I mean, you already take me to bed every night."
You laugh, covering your eyes as you groan, "Oh, god, shut up!" as Art chuckles.
"Let me know when you're free," You add. "Your schedule's gonna be weirder than mine."
"Yeah, I will, as soon as I know what it is." You watch as Art lays down, propping his phone up on the nightstand. "...Can you stay on?"
"Yeah," You soothe, setting your phone on the nightstand in suit. "Until we fall asleep."
"Okay," He murmurs. The two of you settle in on your sides, watching one another on the phone.
"Night, Art."
"Sweet dreams."
--
The restaurant is picked. Your nails are done, your hair is done; you get a new dress, new shoes, a new bag. You're going to have an amazing night—a good dinner, a great conversation, and, if you have any luck, an amazing good night kiss.
--
You know the minute you see him that you're not making it to the restaurant. Art's eyes sweep over you in covetous wonder when you open the door. He closes the gap between the two of you, drawing you into his arms, and this time you go without a second thought. He presses his face into your neck, letting out a gentle hum at the scent of your perfume. The tip of his nose trails up over your jaw, his lips brushing the corner of your lips as his forehead rests against yours. He sighs as you draw in a nervous breath, and he sways in, lips pressing to yours.
You raise your hand to cup his neck, shivering as his hands smooth over your hips. He guides you deeper inside, blindly reaching back and shoving the door shut behind you as you fling your purse toward the bench in your entryway. His kisses grow hungrier as he steers you down the hall. You slip your tongue along his, smoothing your hand up to grasp his hair. Your fingers fumble with the buttons on his shirt, exposing more of his pale, muscled chest to you. He slides down the zipper on the back of your dress and leans away just long enough to draw the dress up over your head. His eyes sweep across you, taking in your lingerie.
You hook your thumbs under the band of your underwear, giving them a teasing wiggle as you back further away from him. You expect him to follow, but he steers you back against the wall, dropping his head to suck hot kisses along your neck and down to your chest. He yanks one of the cups of your bra down, taking your nipple into his mouth. You bite your lip, tipping your head back against the wall and whining as he slots his knee between your thighs. You roll your hips down against the hard muscle as he laves and teases your nipple, reaching up to thumb and tweak the other.
"Art—Mm, god that feels so good."
He groans against your skin, trailing his kisses further down as he lowers himself to his knees. You look down as he curls his fingers around your panties—and waits. You smile softly, nodding, murmuring, "Please?"
Art grins, pressing a kiss to your hip before he gently eases the fabric down, waiting for you to lift your feet so he can fling them away. He leans in, swiping his tongue across your aching clit. Your knees would knock if he wasn't wedged between them. You draw in a shallow breath, letting your head tip back as he draws your leg over his shoulder. You shiver at the feeling of the chilly air against your heated, slick flesh. He nuzzles and laps against your cunt, taking each tip of your hips in stride. His hand smooths up your trembling inner thigh, giving your ass a gentle squeeze before he teases a finger into you. You whimper at the touch, unable to help the way your pussy clenches around it.
Art groans at the feeling, turning his head to smear his lips slips against your hip.
"Goddamn," He breaths against you.
"More."
You feel more than hear his gentle chuckle as he eases another finger in.
"Need it bad, huh?"
"You have no idea."
"I'm getting a pretty good idea." He turns his head, leveling a sucking kiss to your clit that makes you cry out. You tighten your grip on his hair as he pumps his fingers harder, curling and scissoring them as he pushes you closer to the edge.
"Art—Mm, god, fuck, yes—Yes—" Your toes curl in your shoes as your hips rabbit down against his face and fingers, chasing the swell of your orgasm. You look back down as he draws back and find his lips and chin shining with your juices.
"Bed," He urges.
"You can fuck me right here."
Art laughs, standing and smoothing his hand over your thigh.
"We're doing this right."
"We could be doing this right...." You slid your hand down his chest to palm his cock through his pants. "Here."
You grin as Art's eyelids flutter, his dick twitching against you.
"Bed," He insists again.
It isn't far to go, and the two of you are entirely bare by the time you get there. You scooch back onto the bed, spreading your legs as he rolls on a condom. He's over you a moment later, and you watch the bulge of his biceps as he braces his hands on either side of your head. You bite your lip as you feel the brush of his cock against your entrance. You reach down, grasping his cock and guiding him closer.
You tip your head up, tongue teasing the seam of his lips as he eases into you. You melt into the mattress as he crushes against you, filling you completely. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, sliding your legs over his, as if you'll manage to fuse the two of you together. Art's tongue swirls around yours before he captures your lips in a kiss, rolling his hips slowly.
"More," You plead, but Art keeps his pace achingly steady, even when you try to pick up the pace.
"You feel so fucking good," He breathes, "Even better than you taste."
"Harder, Art, please, god damn, please," You whimper. He tips his head to the side nipping at the hinge of your jaw as he reaches down, hiking your hip up even higher. Your mouth fell open with a stunned moan as he presses deeper, the slap of his hips filthily filling the stifling air around you. You arch up against him, nails raking down his back as you feel the swell of another orgasm.
"Art."
"Yeah?"
"Mhm—Fuck, almost—"
"That's it." He sucks his fingers between his lips before he slips them between your bodies, swiping across your tender clit. You begin to close your eyes, but he tuts softly.
"Don't—Don't close your eyes—Look at me," He orders between breaths. You force yourself to focus on Art, taking in the flush on his cheeks, his almost dazed eyes.
"You, too—" You urge.
"Yeah—"
"Oh—yeah," You gasp, unable to keep your gaze on his you cum. You feel Art's hips slap roughly against yours before he slows, groaning low in his chest. You draw in a deep breath as your heart pounds in your chest, sinking back against your pillows as he settles down over you. You smooth your hand over his nape, smiling as he nuzzles against your shoulder, dropping tender kisses to your skin.
"...Art?"
"Yeah?"
"I think we're going to be late for dinner."
--
"You know, I've been thinking."
"You've been doing a lot more than thinking, mister," You mutter, and grin as Art laughs. You cuddle closer against his side, nuzzling into his chest as he tightens his arm around your shoulders.
"I'm glad I didn't know you liked me in college."
"Really?" You tip your head up, brow furrowing. "Why's that?"
"...I wasn't ready for you back then." He smooths his fingers along your jaw, eyes wandering your face contemplatively. "It's like you said, you know. You would've come second."
You nod, turning your head to press a kiss to his palm.
"I don't think I was ready for you, either," You admit. Art smiles.
"And you are now?"
"More than."
Tag list: @missredherring ; @fantasticcopeaglepasta ; @massivecolorspygiant ; @blueeyesatnight ; @amneris21
@ew-erin ; @youngkenobilove ; @carbonated-beverage​​​ ;  @moonlightburned ; @milf-trinity
@millllenniawrites ; @chattychell ; @thembosapphicclown ; @brandyllyn ; @wildmoonflower ;
@buckybarneshairpullingkink ; @mad-girl-without-a-box ; @winchestershiresauce ; @lorecraft ; @kmc1989
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prettyboykatsuki · 1 month
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objects in the mirror | j. togame
✮ tags ; afab!reader + fem!reader, reader is so painfully dense / naive, ambiguous relationships, friends to ???, somewhat unrelieved sexual tension, sex toys, guided masturbation kinda, kissing, groping, nipples play, squirting, dialogue heavy, vaguely post canon, petnames (kame-chan and jo-chan for togame, baby for reader) 18+
✮ wc ; 6.4k (you have got to be fucking with me)
✮ a/n ; the one fic i wont be mad if you ask for part two on lolol. title from a mac miller song (my favorite mac miller song) that reminds me of a lot of characters but i felt really fit this fic.
go listen to it. his best track. also this like... mega got away from me. togame sorry for blueballing you.
✮ synopsis ; your only goal is to have a half-way decent orgasm. togame, as your best friend, is determined to help you reach it.
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"So," Togame leans back into your bed. "You bought a vibrator and... can't use it? Because you keep psyching yourself out?"
"Yeah," You sigh with your head hung low. "Paid good money for it and it's collecting dust in my drawer. I'm miserable."
Togame smiles a little from where he's laid across the width of your bed, back propped up against the wall slightly with his legs hanging off one edge. You kick his side lightly as he fails to contain his amusement.
"Do you enjoy seeing me suffer, huh? You take amusement in my pain, you bastard?"
"Pfft," He snickers, turning a little to face you better. "It's kinda hard not too. Just seems..."
"You think it's stupid," You frown. He scratches his jaw.
"I wouldn't say that. A little silly but—"
"Which is another word for stupid," You point out. He shakes his head.
"The connotations different. Stupid would mean I'm insulting you. I don't think it's stupid. Ridiculous, maybe." And then he laughs to himself like a jackass. "No... I take it back. It's definitely ridiculous."
"You asshole. I should kick you out of my house."
He smiles knowingly, lazy and bemused. "You're not gonna,"
Smug bastard. You groan in defeat. "But I should."
He doesn't reply, brushing you off as easy as ever. "Sorry. Just not sure what exactly you want me to do with that information."
You throw your hands up in the air. "I dunno? Fucking help me. Offer solutions. Use whats left of your brain after getting the shit beat out of you as a teenager. Something."
"Now who's being an asshole." He quips. You frown.
"I'm sorry," You say easily. Togame smiles softly though you miss it while you're looking away. "But...ugh."
"Got such a way with words." He hums sarcastically before sobering a touch. He's scrolling through his phone not entirely paying attenion. "I don't really get why you're askin' me. Don't you have better candidates for this conversation?"
You give him a long-suffering look. "No. Unfortunately I live here, so the answer is not really. I can't talk to Kotoha or Tsubaki about this. We talk about guys and stuff but it's usually pretty PG."
"So I'm your stand in for a girl best friend?"
You tilt your head. "Huh? No. You're just my best friend. I would bitch to you about this either way."
He stares at you for a long while before scrubbing a hand down his face. You can't understand his sudden reaction, watching in confusion as he takes a deep breath.
"Right. Right, I'm your best friend." Togame mutters mostly to himself, sighing before going back to his usual demeanor. He rubs his under his eye. "Really dunno what you're asking for. You can whine however much you want, though."
"I'm not whining," You pause before sighing again. "Okay. Maybe I am whining, like, a little. But you would too if you were me, okay? I want to..." You make a face, the words suddenly feeling clumsy on your lips. You're not even doing anything and you're getting all weird about it. "I just wanna...cum."
Togame pauses. He sits up, sort of suddenly after that and finally has the decency to take off his boots. He scoots to the edge of the bed with his feet on the floor to do it, and you can't see his face when he speaks again. You don't think twice about it.
"Have you not? Like... ever?"
"Huh? No, I have but it's not really satisfying. It doesn't scratch the itch for me, you know? That's what the toy was for."
Togame takes another minute or two of silence as he takes off his boots. You wonder if it always takes him so long to take them off. Seems inconvenient.
He goes back to laying down, leaning on the wall with his legs spread out. "What kinda toy is it anyway?
"Oh, it's—" You stop in the middle of your sentence, brow furrowing. "Wait. Should I be telling you this?"
"Are you suddenly gaining self-awareness? Little late for that." He smiles.
"That's true," You reply, relaxing again with your arms crossed. "Nothing complicated. A rabbit vibrator, but the kinda expensive ones."
"How much?"
"Twelve-thousand yen. I got it on sale too,"
"No wonder you're so peeved you can't use it," Togame comments evenly. "A lot of money to be collecting dust. You even take it out the box?"
You deflate all over again. "Yeah. Charged it. Cleaned it too. But I put it back."
"Lemme see,"
"Huh? Oh, okay. Sure."
You don't bother asking why Togame wants to see your sex toy. It doesn't occur to you that there'd be any reasons outside of plain curiosity which you can understand. Togame dated a girl long-term so he knows some things, but you figure any girl with a decent boyfriend wouldn't need to make the same use of toys as you do. It'd make sense he's never seen one up close and personal.
You scoot to the edge of the bed and lean slightly as you open the side drawer and pull the toy out where it sits in nice, cardboard package. You pass it off to Togame before sitting back comfortably against your headboard.
He sits the box in his lap and stares at it for a long while.
You wonder if this is weird.
It doesn't bother you much either way, but it it is...
Odd, just how long Togame stares at it. He undoes the top of the folded box, pulling it back to reveal the soft, baby blue vibrator. It's six inches long and curved, with a soft rubber attachment to stimulate your clit and angle for your g-spot at the same time. Made with a high quality velveteen silicone. It has a lot of settings, and does the sort of rumbly vibrations you know feel good as opposed to the mechanical buzz of cheaper kinds.
Completely unused, Togame holds in his hands for a while, grabbing it by the ends. He doesn't touch it in a way that's weird. More like he assesses it. Measures it. You don't know for what though.
"It's cute."
"Huh?"
"The vibrator, I mean." Togame comments, putting it back in the box. His expression is unreadable. Something simmers under the surface of his neutral face but you can't place what exactly. "It's a cute color and the little pointed part here is cute."
You place a hand on your chest and close your eyes in sincerity. "Thank you. I also think I have excellent aesthetic taste."
Another pause. Brief but not.
"Do you want help using it?"
"Wha—"
"The vibrator," Togame clarifies before you get through the rest of your sentence. "Do you want me to help you use it?"
Your mind blanks. Your mouth moves faster than you can.
"...In what way?"
Togame remains steady. "Getting you comfortable and putting in you. As far as solutions go, it's the best I've got."
...Huh?
"Wouldn't that be awkward for you?"
"Is it awkward for you?" Togame replies back.
You stop to consider the question then shake your head.
"I mean...It's you. I trust you and I'm grateful but this..." You furrow your brow and look towards him. "Can you really do something like that with me? Just to help me?"
"Yeah." He replies. The words come so easily to him you're startled. Was he always this casual? You guess in a way but still. It's surprising. "It's the most direct route to solve your problem, I think. Once you've done it once with someone else, you'll definitely be able to do it alone right?"
You reason about this and find it's a somewhat optimal solution. You can't figure out the exact source of your unease about all of it, though it's there. You can't figure out Togame either. You appreciate how much he seems to want to help you but it doesn't make your worries go away.
You frown a little deeper.
"You're thinking about it too hard." Togame interjects. His tone is warm and easy.
"You're not thinking about it hard enough," You respond back. "What are you trying to do anyway? To help."
"Scratch the itch for you. Just think of it like that."
"Does that do anything for you?"
He dodges the question. "Don't worry about me. I'm offering. Promise it's fine."
You frown with your legs crossed, staring at the empty space of the bed. "...I g-guess it's fine? I can't think of a reason to say no."
"You don't mind doing this with me? Or is it because you're okay with anyone?"
You shake your head.
"What are you saying? Of course it's because you're the one asking. I trust you."
He smiles genuinely at that, eyes closed in what seems like relief. "I just wanted to make sure."
Togame opens his eyes again and casts them your way. Your breathing feels shallow under the weighted glance. He sits up a little more and shrugs his jacket off his shoulders, placing it on the pillow next to you. He feels broader without the layer of fabric over his torso, white shirt stretching over his frame as he sits on the bed on his knees.
"Lay down. Get comfortable."
You nod, adjusting the pillows and things and trying not to feel self-conscious or get cold feet. It speaks to your desperation that you're taking this help so willingly and from your long time best friend no less. In the back of your head, you do feel a little strange.
Togame is just being a good friend, that's what you tell yourself. You believe it too.
He hovers above you first. You tilt your head to look at him, the short gap of space between you feeling particularly small while also being miles wide. Your stomach flutters as Togame's eyes fix on your lips.
He leans forward and presses his mouth to yours. It's chaste. You wonder if you look even half as surprised as you feel.
"What was that for?"
"Breaking the ice."
You mumble. "Oh..."
Togame kisses you again that time, and then one more time before speaking up. "You're so naive."
"Huh? No I'm not,"
He brushes you off again that time before sitting up again. He sits between your legs where you have them spread. You have no idea what he's thinking or why he's doing this.
Unlike most people, you usually do have a good read on what Togame is feeling. He's upfront most of the time, despite his posturing seeming wishy-washy. It's a little weird to feel so out of bounds around him, like he purposely has his guard up. You wonder if that guard is for you, or for him. Is he uncomfortable somehow? Is he trying not to hurt your feelings by not being interested? You're not really expecting that.
But if that were the case, there's no reason he would help you this way.
Before you get too entranced in your thoughts, Togame snaps you out of them.
"How do you normally do this?"
You blink and look up.
"Do what?"
"Get off," Togame answers. Your eyes meet and you find yourself wanting to look away. "You said it was unsatisfying so I thought it'd be better if we started there,"
"Uhm," You feel embarrassed trying to talk about this. You're not sure why. It's not something you'd feel self-conscious outside this specific context but Togame just seems more... intense then usual. Like he's being serious about your silly problem. "D-depends? Sometimes I watch porn or listen to audios or read. Not always."
"Got it. How do you touch yourself then?"
He looks expectant. You turn your head to look away from him. The minutes tick by.
"Uhm... just rubbing my c-clit usually. I have uhm, other toys I'll use sometimes too but I need to touch my clit to get off." You wonder if these are too many details. Togame is listening to it so carefully. "Uhm. If i-its too sensitive I'll touch over my clothes too. Sometimes I cum like that."
His face shifts. It lingers long enough for you to notice but not enough for you to process what it was. He's back to his usual self so quickly you wonder if you've made the entire thing up.
"Right. I think I know what your problem is,"
You feel a little relieved at that. "Really?"
He pauses before smiling a little with a friendly nod that reminds you of how you were when you were kids, a face that's unexpectedly kind. "Really."
You look at him expectantly.
"I think you're not building up to it enough." Togame comments, smoothly. You blink at him. "You're a girl, you know? Can't jump straight into it, you need to stimulate yourself more first and relax. You're so focused on cumming it backfires. I'll help you."
"How...?"
"I'll help you relax and help you figure out what you like. Don't think about it too hard and focus on feeling good."
"You really don't have to do this for me," You mumble. He smiles at you.
"C'mon. You just said I was your best friend right? I don't mind, so chill out and let me help."
"Okay," You nod, bright eyed. "Okay....thank you."
He makes a face at you before nodding. "Uh-huh. Of course."
Togame hovers above you with lazy smile. You close your eyes on instinct as you feel your lips press together. His lips are softer than you thought they'd be. A hand cups the back of your neck and brings you closer to him. The weight of his body makes you self-conscious about his proximity. You can smell the scent of his skin, feel his presence surround you as he kisses you soft to start.
The shift in the air surrounding you is gradual in a way that reminds you so much of Togame. He's not intense at the beginning, never is really is - but then his hand goes to hold your knees and pull your legs up. His tongue slips against the closed seam of your lips until they part, until he touches yours and you have to reconfigure how you breathe. He's so good at kissing you it makes you wonder if he's kissed you before and you can't remember. But then it feels good and you're reminded—
If it felt this good there's no way you would've forgotten it.
When you pull away for air to breathe, or start to stumble through a question on how this is helping - Togame shuts you up. It takes it happening twice for you realize it's deliberate. Every time he kisses you a little deeper, and the last time he slips his tongue in so far you'd think he's trying to eat you whole.
You're wet. You're unsure if you're allowed to feel guilty about it, or if you're even meant too. Anyone would be turned on getting kissed like this. You're really unsure about all of this but you're fine because it's Togame. There's no way he'd do anything bad to you or for you.
He's over protective in general, though he's rarely frank about it.
(If you were any less clueless, you'd would know that most times Togame is doing his best to protect from himself. Most times, he feels like the biggest danger to you)
Togame pulls away from your lips when you moan a little. You feel embarrassed at the state your left in and how he looks at you. Picking you apart in his mind but not with ill intent. Like he wants to know every thread of your want.
Again, you think he's going to tease you. Light but still teasing.
"Does that feel good?"
It's a serious question. It stuns you. Just a little. His hand on the back of neck feels hot. You notice the way his thumb caresses your nape and try not to stutter.
"Uh..y-yeah." You reply, trying not to look stupid. "I like kissing. Uhm. In general."
He doesn't react to that, nods in a way you find curt in comparison to how passionately he was kissing you just moments ago. "It'll help you relax." And then, a little softly. "If you want to kiss again and we're not already, ask."
An odd request but you acquiesce with another soft noise.
"Do you feel a little warmed up?"
His eyes are so strangely shaded in this light. You open your mouth to the awkward confession. "Oh... nn. I'm... y-yeah. I'm wet already."
"From kissing?"
You give him a sheepish look. Togame responds with another kiss that makes you feel like you're being driven into a corner. This one is hot and heavy, doesn't build up but starts with an almost oppressive air. He nips at you, teeth tugging at your lips and licking in earnest to your mouth. Long and deep until your brain feels melty, your thoughts swimming and clouded. Longing for touch and release. Arousal threads through the fibers of your muscles, makes you feel wound up tight - a serpents coil. You clench your thighs on instinct at the worsening wetness.
Your mouth feels swollen and bitten when you pull away again and Togame looks a little more like you're used to him looking. An underlying sense of smug self-satisfactions on his face as he looks down at you, not outweighed by his genuine ease.
A look on his face like he likes your company. You find him comforting in how easy it is to see.
"Is it okay to touch you in other places?"
"Uhm. Anywhere above the belt is fine, I think."
"Makes sense,"
He leans up and slides both hands underneath your hoodie. You're not really prepared for... this. You don't know if you can call it sex or not but whatever it is, you weren't intending for it to happening.
"You're not wearing a shirt," His hands feel so big on your waist. Big and calloused, split skin scarred over from fighting. "A bra?"
"A sports bra."
"Right."
He slides your hoodie up over your torso until it's bare and takes your sports bra along with it in one go. Your tits fall from them with a soft swish with how quick he does it, the light bounce making your skin grown hot. Togame hovers above you as he eyes them, palms just underneath but not touching.
"Stop looking so hard."
He brushes past that. "They're nice."
"Shut up," You say for the first time. Togame smiles slightly.
"Not a nice way to talk to someone who's helping you," He says sarcastically. You pout but refuse to apologize. He remains unbothered then goes back to being alarmingly serious. "Do you play with them?"
"H-huh? When I masturbate? Not really. I've never thought too."
"Why's that?"
You shrug. "The guys I dated used to touch them but it mostly felt weird, not good. Never thought of trying on my own."
He gives you a looking asking for permission. You nod. This really does not feel normal but the arousal clouding your brain is a lot louder than your sense of shame.
Togame's hands slide up your sides until he's cupping the roundness of your chest. His thumbs hover against hardened nipples, constrained in the touch. It's different than how other guys have done it for you. He's paying attention to that bit most, and he's going about it softly. Pushing the hardened bud with a light flick that sends a jolt of shock through your body.
He's quick to notice your reaction, green eyes flickering up before doing it again. You squirm, stretching your legs and shifting as another tick of arousal goes through your whole body. Your clit is starting to throb so much it hurts. If it were you, you would've started touching yourself a long while ago. As soon as you felt yourself get wet.
Togame is taking his time, though. And you're feeling it so much it's a little shameful for you. He does it again, touching your nipples - both side at the same time. Your body is pushing for more.
You've managed to keep the noise down but you're pushed over your usual limits. A moan spills from your lips as you push up into his touch. "That's good, huh? Just needed it a little softer and more focused."
You try not to be any more embarrassing. Wouldn't anyone feel weird over this?
He's the most important person in your entire life, and he's seeing you like this. Not judging you, just remaining even and consistent. Teasing you but not enough to make you upset. He's being so careful. Is this the kind of boyfriend he is? You think that must make him popular, so then... why does it never work out? He's never dated anyone longer than a year.
But he's being so sweet to you despite not dating. He's always kind but this is different. You can't imagine who would see this part of him and break up.
You try not to think about any of this but the only other thing you can focus on is him rubbing your nipples and how nice it feels. The moan of his name is pitchy, sounds foreign to your own ears with how high and broken it is.
"Kame-chan," Your voice is warbly when you ask. You just want to stop thinking. "Kiss?"
He pauses. You think he's going to deny you at first.
"Fuck. That ain't fair, you know?"
You don't know what he means, but he complies and kisses you open mouthed as he plays with your tits. Rubs and flicks them just the way you like. It feels so good. You've never felt anything like it before. Your tummy flutters, honeyed lust dripping down your inner thighs.
Your body moves on it's own, your hands carding through his hair as arousal starts to pool. Your panties feels soaked and sticky, through the fabric. You shift again trying to relieve the feeling, brain scrambled by Togame's touch.
You're so horny you can't make sense of anything. Your body is a relentless echo of your wants and needs - demanding attention. His attention, specifically. Need curls up in your chest.
Between kisses you confess this to Togame, who you trust now more than ever despite feeling so incredibly vulnerable. How could you not go with it when he's taking such good care of you?
"Wanna cum so bad," You mutter, sloppy between kisses. Togame takes in a deep breath as he pulls away.
"You think you're worked up enough for it?"
You see through him instantly even in your haze. "Don't be mean to me, you jerk."
"Caught me, huh? Okay, okay. How do you normally do this?"
"Do what?"
"Fuck yourself with something,."
The words send heat sparking against your spine. You tuck your face against his jacket where it's laying besides you and huff. It smells like him. "Ngh. Usually finger myself a little first."
"Got a good idea then." He hums. The sound of his voice, low and smooth, makes you feel comforted. "I'll lay next to you and help keep you distracted while you open yourself up, yeah? Nothing below the belt 'n all. And when you're already I'll put in for you and turn it on."
You sniff. "Okay."
He smiles at you, pulling his hands and body away from you before laying besides you instead. He lets you rest your head against his arm and shoulders - sneaking the rest of his arm around and underneath you, squeezing one of your tits. He presses your body into him and gropes around the bed for the box with your toy, grabbing it from inside before shoving it away.
Up close, you can feel his muscles even better than you could. You wonder how someone so relaxed could be this built but try not to let it burden your brain. He smells so nice. Did he always? You feel too horny to remember, but you like it.
You can feel him glancing down at you, amused.
"Comfy?" Togame's voice vibrates through your whole body.
"Uh-huh."
"If you turn your head towards me I can kiss you and touch you. Keep your mind occupied a bit."
"Oh. That makes sense."
"It does right? Go ahead and start."
You think you should tell him not to watch. Keeps his eyes for himself. But the focus of his gaze makes you burn so much hotter you don't bother. He's already seen so much, anyway.
You shimmy out of your sweat pants until they're down at your ankles revealing your panties. Baby blue printed boyshorts, fabric soaked until they look a nearly new navy shade. You feel his laughter less than you hear it, turning your head to glare at him. He smiles a little at you.
"Those are cute too," Togame comments. You can hear his voice so clearly like this you think you'll collapse if you pay too much attention to it. "Too bad you made 'em all messy."
You swallow a sound, too horny to protest. He stops you before you can take your panties off.
"Didn't you say you normally touch over the fabric when you're sensitive? Do that."
"But—"
"Just trust me," He promises. He kisses your hair. Your heart thuds when he does it. It's an innocent gesture. "It'll make it more satisfying, okay?"
Your shaky as you spread yourself a little wider and slip your hand down between your legs. All the desire you're holding starts to unwind as your middle finger slides over the soaked seam of your cotton panties. They're cuter than normal, printed with florals and lace trimmed. Absolutely drenched in your arousal. You rub a small circle into your clit and your whole body breaks out into shivers, your eyes fluttering closed at the sensation.
You could cum like this. Just from this. But you want something more, something better so you force yourself to go slow.
"It's messy," Togame hums, nonchalant. "You get easier than I thought you would. Are you going slow so you don't cum right away?"
"Don't point it out, aah,"
"You should cum if you want too," Togame suggests.
"No," You whine. "Wanna cum with the toy."
"Wanna cum with a cock inside you, ya mean? A silicone one but still. Not enough to just touch yourself, you need something more, is that it?"
He says the words so casually, so lightly. Almost friedly despite how filthy they are. There's no malice in them.
Spoken like high praise or affection. The kind you'd show a kitten,.
"Kame—"
"Didn't know your had such a need pussy. No wonder it's hard to cum all by yourself, huh?"
"Stop being mean," You gasp. "I'll cum,"
He laughs at that. It's genuine and bright.
"Too much for ya, huh? S'okay. Take these off now. Finger yourself. Make sure you get all that mess you made so we can use on your toy. It'll hurt if it's dry going in."
You feel blindsided by just how much Togame is talking. He's been so quiet, so brief and unreadable. He feels like his usual self too much, to your complete detriment. His voice is teasing, yet warm and sweet. He smells good and he's pressing you all against his chest. Your fingers tremble as you slide your panties down to your ankles same as before. You end up shimmying the rest of your clothes off.
You're so aroused it's easy to get the first finger in. Your hole twitches, the entrance pleasurable as slowly ease your middle finger down to knuckle. You til your head towards Togame as you get adjusted to the intrusion easily from how wet you are, pouting your lips. He gives into the kiss right away, warm tongue and soft lips familiar to you now. You ease yourself into the pace of his kiss, whimpering into his mouth as you slowly open yourself on second finger.
"I want it so bad," You mumble. He laughs against your mouth.
"I can tell. Can barely string a sentence together. You want to cum huh?"
"Uh-huh."
"What a naughty pussy. You're trembling from just fingering yourself. Won't you cum right away if I put in you at once? I'll have to go slowly," Togame explains. He speaks the filth so naturally. "Take my time so you're stretched nicely and not scared anymore. I'll turn the vibrator on after it's already inside so you can't run away from it. You can cum to your hearts content, then."
"I'm still scared," You admit. You're just so horny you're unsure of what else to do. He leans down to kiss you again, nose brushing against yours intimately.
"Don't be scared. Just focus on stretching so you're not so tight. I'll praise you if you take it in easily."
Your voice gives once you manage to get a third in. Togame doesn't stop kissing you, barely giving you enough air to breathe. He plays with your chest with his free hand, and holds the toy with the other.
A string of spit connects you. Your thighs are aching, body burning hot as you look at him directly.
"Wanna cum," You slur your words, speaking in short sentences. Togame grins a little.
"Take your fingers out and show them to me."
Your stomach flips but you comply with the request. Your face burns from how soaked they are.
"Good. Rub them on the toy now. Get it as sticky as you can."
Your heart is pounding is loud in your ears as you clumsily coat your new toy with your own mess. You watch it gain a fresh shine, baby blue turning reflective as you push it against and between your fingers until all of it's coated as best you can.
"That's it, good. Spread your legs now. Gonna put it in. Want me to kiss you?"
You nod sheepishly and close your eyes. Togame laughs warmly before kissing you again.
Your whole body throbs in anticipation for it. A muscular forearm and hand slip between your legs as you spread yourself open, your feet flat on the bed for easier access. Togame forces his tongue into your open mouth, kissing you wet and hard as he tweaks your nipples. You feel pleasantly suffocated from the pressure before gasping into his mouth.
The swollen silicone head of your toy stretches your pussy more than you thought it would. You've never had a toy with angles so the sensations are all new. You can feel it so well inside of you, you can barely keep your composure long enough to stop moaning as just the tip slides in. Togame swallows each noise from your mouth. His kisses feel almost ferocious now when they were so composed before, free hand cupping your jaw from one side.
He fucks it in slowly, rocking the toy by its handle slowly until you get used to it - giving you moments between to adjust. You can feel it bottom out inside of you, the head pressing so precise on your swollen gspot you could cum from bucking your hips. Your sensitivity is over the top. Every touch and and tease and bump makes your cunt clench and throb.
The blunt end of the rubber attachment presses against your needy little clit. Togame moves the toy a little, fucking you with it slightly again. Barely. It still nearly makes you cum.
You feel like he's edging you. Anymore than this, you think you'll go crazy.
"Kame-chan." Your voice is beyond wrecked, throat as one of your hands reaches to cling desperately to his short sleeves. You fist it, teary. "Jo, turn it on please. Make me cum. Wanna cum so bad, 'm so close, please, please. C'mon."
"Turning it on, baby. Easy."
The word baby makes your body melt.
A slight click sounds as Togame turns on the vibrator.
Your whole body lurches at the sudden change. Togame pins you with his own, keeps his hands steady and the toy inside of you without skipping a beat. The soft whirr of the first setting completely unravels you. It feels like every nerve in your body is being pulled apart, electricity through a frayed copper wire. The muscles in your body aching with anticipation after so many dissatisfying orgasms clench tight as your body prepares itself for something so vast your mind can't process it at all. Your hands fist at your sides, clutching the sheets as you get close to cumming.
You're thrashing from the sensation. It's so much, too much - you've never felt anything like it before. You feel full and euphoric and your head is spinning. It feels so good it terrifies you, makes you clench up hard in how unbearably unrelenting it is. There's no pace, no where to escape from. The vibrations are strong but not overwhelming to the point you can't feel them.
You're so senstive all over your body and it's touching you in two places.
Your spine starts to curl into an arch, hips stuttering and twisting as you feel it rushing over your consciousness. Fuck, you've wanted this for so long. It's exactly the high you've been chasing after on your own for so many months it's making your brain feel like like mush. Animal instinct forces your hips up, bucking against Togame's hand where he holds the toy. You're fucking yourself on it. You can hear him laugh as he moves to meet you ruts.
You feel like you're losing your fucking mind.
"G-gonna—fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! I can't, I can't, I can't. Feels so good, Ican't."
He leans in and gets close to your ear, tongue caressing the lobe before biting it soft.
"Yes you can. You want it so bad don't you? Wanna cum all over this cock so bad you've been aching for it. I know you want it, I can see it. Look how much your moving your hips." His voice is shaking, hands flicking your nipples messy and harsh as he speaks. "Look what a mess you're making. You're leaking everywhere. You want it badly right? Don't think about it and cum. Cum as much as you want. Cum for me,"
The last words are the ones to snap the thread inside of you.
Your brain bluescreens as your body seizes before finally, finally giving you the orgasm you've been chasing. You smash your lips against Togame's as your spine arches off the bed, thrashing in place. Something in you undoes - and you feel a wet rush spray from between your legs at the same time your orgasm hits. Your mind feels completely and utterly blanked. Your body is in total rapture, uncontrollable pleasure fucking your brain until you're stupid and slack jawed. It feels so good, so so good. You didn't know anything could ever feel that good in your life. It's scary.
You feel like you could get addicted. Your high rides out for much longer than ever before. In between sloppy kisses, you say the same words over and over and over. Togame grips you close to him as you do.
"Jo," You mutter. "Thank you, thank you, thank you—feels so fffucking good, fuck. I can't, I can't. Off, off. 's too much, I'll pee."
Instead of turning it off, he turns the vibration up by one. Your eyes fly open as you gasp, words rushed. Panicked.
"I can't," You swear, looking at him for mercy. His face is flushed. "I can't, Jo-chan, I'll cum again, I'll—"
"Cum." He says, demands - voice rougher than you've heard it all night. "I know you can. Cum,"
On demand practically, your legs seize up and you cum again a second time in near succession. You feel so fucking incredible you think you're going to die.
"Fuck!"
You squirt again, body nearly giving out as more short spurts soak your sheets and mattress. Your pussy is pulsing in the after math, trembling and clenching so violently. You whine loudly as Togame stops the vibration and pulls the toy out, shivering as it catches on your tight hole before coming out of it with a soft pop.
Your legs are twitching.
Even though Togame has no more reason to kiss you he does. And even though you're well past the point of needing to kiss him back, you do more affectionately than any time prior.
"You made me feel so good it's freaking me out." You admit, shaking uncontrollably.
Togame pauses before breaking out into genuine laughter. He kisses your head, arm wrapping around your shoulders until you're hugged against him.
"You were so sexy like that."
You blink at him, face flushed.
"Sexy?"
"I was really hard seeing you cum," He says, casually looking down. "I didn't know you could be cute and ask for kisses. You're usually more—"
You put a hand over his mouth.
"Whatever you're gonna say shut up,"
He just smiles, cheek against your hair. "I'm glad you got to feel good."
"What about you?" You mumble, feeling your heart pick up just asking. "Are you still hard? I feel like I should pay you back somehow,"
He looks at you seriously. "Do you know what you're implying?"
You fold a little but nod anyway. "Yeah."
"Do you really? The monk thing is a joke, you know. If you offer something like that, I won't be able to stop."
"It's fine," You say confidently before adding, much quieter. "I r-really want to do... it with you."
Togame pauses before kissing you deeply. Your whole body feels molded to him now.
"Damn it." He looks down at you, black hair sticking to his skin. You wanna feel his undercut with your hands in his hair. "You know this ain't normal between friends, right?"
"Uhm, yeah? I figured."
"Don't go around getting help from anyone."
You shake your head. "It's only 'cause it's you."
He scrubs a hand over his face and laughs. "You don't need to stir me up anymore. I'm already hard enough. Can't keep my composure at all."
You tilt your head in confusion. Togame just sighs.
"Don't worry about it." He says, shaking his head. "How soon can I get my thanks?"
Your eyes widen as you clench again. "Uhm. Now, if you want it."
He grins a little lazy, eyes swimming with adoration.
"I do," He hums, laying back as you get up from where you've been laying. "Come over here and let me touch you properly then."
"Is that what you really want?"
You climb ontop of him, bare naked almost as your hoodie falls back down over your torse. Togame slides the fabric up and gives you a meaningful look.
"More than anything,"
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rafeandonlyrafe · 6 days
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southern rivalries
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warnings: 18+ only, smut, college au, cheerleader!reader, football player!rafe, college football but i dont know anything so please excuse any wrong details, rivals to lovers, p in v sex, protected sex to unprotected sex lol, sixty nine, male and female receiving oral, male receiving handjob, brief injury but no one is seriously hurt
words: 2.3k
“they're not just a different school.” steffie says, placing her hands down on the table as her tone turns way too serious for the subject. “they're our rivals, our arch nemeses. the war has torn families apart.”
“it's football.” you say plainly. “college. football.”
“i can tell you're new here.” steffies friend tiffy agrees (you've always wondered if they purposely chose their nicknames to rhyme considering they seem attached at the hip). “you just don't get it. football is life here in the south.”
“and north carolina are our rivals. even though we are north carolina.” you are trying to wrap your head around the culture at your new school.
“kind of but also, not at all.” tiffy says while steffie finishes the sentiment for her. “we are nc state. the wolf pack. our rivals are unc tar heels.”
“tar heels is a dumb name.” you snort.
“exactly!” steffie agrees.
the conversation shifts, but it never goes to far from football, too far from the rivalry that seems to extend to everything, from other sports to academics.
“did you cheer in high school?” steffie asks.
“yeah.” you nod. “well, not sideline because it conflicted with volleyball. i did competitive though.”
“you should try out for our sideline team. we need more numbers and…” her voice turns to a whisper like she's sharing a deep, dark secret. “my sister is the team captain. you'll definitely get on the squad if i put in a good word for you.”
-- two months later --
“wolf!” you shout with your fellow cheerleaders, listening to the crowd scream back.
“pack!”
“wolf!” you yell again before dropping your poms, quickly learning that most of the girls never did competitive cheer and aren't the best tumblers, leaving you to be the one flipping across the sidelines to the cheers of fans.
you wave and kick and cheer, just happy to have something to do on friday nights. you feel a little guilty for beating out girls that are a lot more passionate about football and your college, but you try your best to put it past you.
you get back in the line, yelling out cheers and keeping your cheeks stretched wide with a smile, occasionally glancing at the clock to see how much longer until your halftime routine (as well as the score… a little bit.)
the seconds are ticking down and you're about to raise your poms again to shake the red and white colors in the air, when you suddenly feel a presence behind you, but before you can turn, you're hit in the back.
“ahhh!” you scream out and fall forward, the football player falling with you as the ball falls from his hands.
“shit.” he groans and quickly rolls off of you. “are you okay?”
you roll over onto your back, coughing and trying to suck in oxygen after the air was knocked out of your lungs.
you realize quickly that the football player now moved to hover over top of you is not one of your own with his powder blue jersey and white helmet.
“im-” you take another deep suck of breath, but this time not in recovery as you see his face through the face mask, blue eyes looking into yours and the most handsome face you've ever seen.
“im fine.” you manage to say before you're surrounded by a crowd, the wolfpack players pulling the opposing player away and your fellow cheerleaders helping you back up.
steffie pushes strands of hair out of your face, getting you back to proper uniform while tiffy shoves your fallen poms back into your grip.
“ew.” tiffy says, wiping the back of your uniform like the tar heel player left a literal stain on you.
“and our cheerleader is back and up on her feet! let's give it up for her as number 19 rafe cameron re-enters the field after their clash.”
you wave your hand in the air as the crowd claps for you, their attention briefly away from the field, but there's only one thing on your mind. rafe cameron.
-- two hours later --
“what are you doing?” steffie yells, snatching your phone from your hand and making you quickly regret agreeing to be her and tiffies third roommate.
“don't you know fraternization is not allowed with tar heels?”
“im not doing anything!” you grab your phone back out of her hand, still opened up to his instagram page. “simply looking at the guy who hit me, okay? i was just curious.”
“mhm.” steffie gives you a glaring look that clearly says she doesn't believe you.
you sigh softly and close out of the account, not that there's many posts to look at anyways, and only a few not on the football field with his helmet off and structured face in full view.
“let's go out.” you say quickly.
“after we lost the game?” steffie shakes her head.
“alright, whatever.” you get up to get dressed in something cute, not willing to let the football teams loss hold you back from living your life, and admittedly you need a breath of fresh air away from cheer or football or your dorm mates.
--
you're at a club you've never been to before, not one of the ones that plasters wolfpack pride posters to all of their walls and plays the red and white anthem like it's a kesha song.
you show the bouncer your id and step into the music filled room, quickly ordering yourself a drink when you hear loud whooping from a different section.
you look over and find a group of men that you quickly realize despite the clubs colorful lighting are wearing that recognizable baby blue.
“of course.” you groan, just happening to stumble into the same bar as the unc players while you're trying to not think about football or even college despite all your classes being easy entry level.
you're about to pay your tab and leave when a deep, familiar voice speaks from jarringly close.
“another drink of whatever the lady is having.”
“i- no, no.” you shake your head, only briefly glancing at him. rafe. “im fine.”
“you're that cheerleader, aren't you?” he leans his elbow against the table, and the bartender makes you a drink and places it down in front of you despite your attempted disapproval.
“yeah.” you nod. “not that… into all of this i guess.” you shrug, hand waving at the logo on his shirt. “i didn't know y'all came here to celebrate.”
“ah.” he nods. “and your name?”
you realize quickly that you know far too much about him when all he knows is that he accidentally hit you, and that you cheer for his rival team.
“y/n.” you reply, taking a sip of your drink, actually tasting it this time instead of quickly gulping it down like you did the first time.
“im rafe.” he reaches his hand out and you shake it, wondering if the invisible blue stain is somehow going to be picked up on by steffie and tiffy when you eventually make it back to your dorm.
“i never got to properly apologize. i did look for you after the game. i guess it was fate that brought you here tonight.” rafe squeezes your hand, and you quickly realize it's still held in his grip. “im sorry.”
“im not supposed to-” you quickly take your hand out of his grasp. “im not supposed to be talking to you. sorry.”
“ah.” he says again. “that pesty no fraternization rule. im not supposed to be talking to you either.”
there's a pause, a mutual understanding and acknowledgement of the tension brewing between the two of you.
“but that's not going to stop me from asking you back to my hotel room.”
the words barely leave his lips before your mouth is on his.
--
it's a mess of hands, furiously grabbing and tugging at clothes until you're both down to just your undergarments.
“shit.” you laugh, noticing that even rafes underwear is carolina blue.
“team issued.” he clarifies quickly as he pulls you down with him as he falls back onto the bed. your lips press against his as you straddle his hips.
you press your crotch down over his, feeling the way he's already pressing up against your panties.
“god, let me get my mouth on you.” you groan, sinking down to lick and kiss at the grooves of his chest and abs, trying to commit the taste of his skin to memory, not sure if you'll ever have this chance again.
you reach his blue boxers and press your lips against the clear outline of his hard cock, wetting the fabric with your spit before you're sick of the barrier and lean back only to pull the underwear down his thighs.
“fuck.” rafe moans out when your mouth is immediately back on his cock, this time able to put his length into your mouth as you bob your head up and down, quickly setting a rhythm as you try to coax your throat to allow him deeper.
“y/n.” rafe tugs on your hair, and you groan when you're forced to pull away.
“what?” you snap.
“get your ass up here.” 
you move quickly, shucking off your panties and moving so your pussy is hovering over rafes face. he looks up at you for a brief second, just to take a breath and stare into your glistening cunt, before his hands are pulling your hips down and your clit onto his awaiting mouth.
you take his cock in your hand, pressing open mouth kisses and licks all over, not sure how well you can blow him when your moans are loud and filling the hotel room.
rafe mumbles something that you can't might make out, but it may be “delicious.” as his mouth devours your pussy, tongue swiping through your folds obsequiously, paying attention to every moan of yours and what causes your pussy to clench.
“fuck.” you groan, hand moving to take over for your mouth as your jaw drops open, stroking up and down his length that makes your cunt squeeze again thinking about having inside you.
rafe pushes your hips away, and before you can argue or control your body, he uses his strong football muscles to flip you into your back and rest your head against the hotel rooms fluffy pillows.
“i need you.” rafe says, reaching towards his wallet on the nightstand and pulling out a condom, tearing it before sinking the rubber over his length.
“fuck yes.” you moan out. who knew exactly what you needed to feel better was to hookup with the player on the opposing team, the rule breaking only making things even more exciting.
rafe grabs your leg and pulls it over his hip before lining up with your entrance. he sinks forward slowly, eyes on your face in case you show any sign of pain.
“you're so fucking warm.” rafe moans out, dropping to kiss you sloppily as his hips press all the way forward, cock buried inside of you. 
he gives you both a minute to adjust before hes hovering over you, strong arms holding himself up as he pounds into you.
“fuck!” you squeal out, one hand gripping the bed sheets while the other reaches up to the headboard, trying to find some stability while he wrecks your pussy.
you hope rafe won't last too long because you can already feel your high building despite not wanting it to be over anytime soon.
one time certainly won't be enough to satisfy you, especially not as you look up at rafes face, still gorgeous and chiseled even as his jaw is slackened as he fucks you with pure pleasure and bliss in his eyes.
“you-” you gasp out. “you feel amazing. so good.”
“damn right i do.” rafe smiles a cocky grin down at you as he somehow manages to speed up even more. “filling you perfectly. this pussy is mine.”
you try (and fail) to not let the words go to your head.
you even briefly think of what your fellow cheerleaders would think if they knew what you were doing right now, how tiffy and steffie would react if they knew just how much that unseen blue has been smeared across your naked body, how much of it is dripping from your cunt.
“im-im not far.” rafe warns, ignoring the cramp in his throwing arm to warn you.
“ffff-” you hold back the urge to curse again as your mind spins. “condom off, please. i need you to cum in me.”
rafe certainly isn't going to argue, even though it might not be the smartest idea. he kneels between your legs, one hand coming to massage your clit while the other pulls the condom off. 
rafe strokes himself once before pushing back inside of you, keeping one hand on your clit as your pleasure grows, hips seeming to raise higher and higher off the bed the closer your high gets.
“cumming.” rafe manages to say seconds before he bursts, warm spurts of cum filling your insides, thankfully not being wasted being trapped inside rubber.
the warm filled sensation causes you to tip over the edge too, body shaking as rafe collapses over you, rubbing your clit with his cock lodged inside of you until both your highs have worn out, your pussy sucking and clenching out every bit of cum he has to give.
“god.” rafe rolls off of you and onto his back. “you are fucking amazing.”
“you did most of the work.” you giggle.
“you know.” rafe says as he pulls you into his chest. “you play us at home in three weeks.”
“mmm.” you lift your head up and press a kiss against his jaw before you bare your teeth and nip at his skin. “perfect time for us to get revenge.”
“keep that up and i might just have to tackle you again next game.” rafe laughs, but you just flip over so you're on top of him, straddling his hips as his cock starts to grow again.
“you wouldn't dare.”
“if it gets you in my bed all night then i might.”
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peachesofteal · 3 months
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sighs Price/Simon/mama (female reader) 18+ mdni - threesome M/M/F, spit, daddy, praise, size, lactation, breeding kink. The softest dub con. This is an AU to the original story, Through Me. Price has a wife in Through Me and Simon has mama, neither of them would ever share.
It starts with a dinner.
Red wine decanted. Red meat rare, bleeding all over a plate. Price sits across from Simon at the table, with you at the head. Fixed between them like a flower sprouted in rock.
They're here because Simon has seen the way he watches. He's noticed how his captain considers both himself and you, the way he cocks his head to left and trails his eyes up and down your body.
It's reminiscent of days old. Nights passed when he and John bent pretty things to their will, split open and overwhelmed, gasping and clawing as they systematically broke them apart.
A wild ride. A way to blow off some steam. A thing never meant to be more than what it was. Secret nights in the dark.
There was a wild gleam in John's eyes, weeks ago. Simon only caught the fractured glimpse of it, there one second, gone in the next, but when they locked eyes afterwards, he knew.
They both did.
He wouldn't be doing this unless he trusted his captain implicitly. Trusted him to care for you, to give you what's needed, to see it all the way through. There's something digging around in Simon's brain about it, some imagery he can't escape.
The best way out is through.
They end up in the living room, after dinner. There's still half a bottle of wine left, and when he pulls you in for a kiss it's there on his tongue, purpled fruit and acid, alcohol loosening the tension in your neck, your spine.
Simon sits on the couch next to John. Not yet touching, but if both were shift their legs, they'd be there, knee to knee. "C'mere mama." Simon spreads wide, patting the inside of his thigh, indicating where you're to sit, and when you settle on his lap, half turned to face his captain, he rests a hand on his thigh. "Did you enjoy dinner, sweet girl?"
"It was very good." You peek at John through your lashes, demure, shy. "Thank you for cooking."
"Was my pleasure." He smiles, blue eyes crinkling at the corners, and you return it as Simon rubs circles on your waist. He can feel the fabric of your thong beneath the dress you chose tonight, thin, narrow fabric stretched over your cunt, nearly non-existent barrier separating you from the craven.
It's important you're not so worked up, too early. He needs to keep you torpid, wine drenched and saccharine, before working you up to a frenetic pace, so he moves his hand to your back, stroking up and down slowly, using an aimless conversation about work as a distraction. "Think Laswell's gonna be out for this next one?"
"Don't know. Suppose so. We'll need her. Can't get over half the hurdles without her support." His legs spread, marginally. enough that his knee is touching your feet, your toes, and you glance down. Simon observes your thought process in real time; intrigue, confusion clearing before it ever really takes root. You brush it off.
But he sees the opportunity, target hot to strike.
He moves his hand under the hem of your dress, up your thigh. You tense, blinking at him in confusion, and he brushes his lips against your ear. "Relax, honey." He finds heat between your legs, circling over your panties, and you squeak, locking onto his wrist.
"Si-"
"John was so nice to have us over for dinner, wasn't he?" You nod, shakily, as Simon peppers your cheek, your jaw with kisses. "Fed us so well. Don't y'think we should say thank you?" His cock is solid beneath your ass, and he flexes his hips, driving the point home, still stroking over your panties. John is locked in, watching the flutter of your dress, staring beneath your knees.
"Um, I," he presses directly on your clit, stealing your words, whatever you meant to say dying on a whine. Your lips part beneath him, already slick, already wanting.
"Put your heels on John's thighs, mama." You stare at him, eyes wide, and he gives you an encouraging nod. "Don't worry. We'll take care of you." The angle provided when you lift your feet tilts you, and John turns.
"Gonna touch you, love," he carefully palms your knees, "right here," turning so that you're now facing him head on, toes flexing on both of his thighs. Simon peels your dress back, shucking it up around your belly, and then parts your legs. His captain huffs a short groan.
"Jus' want John to be able see, is all." He hooks a finger into the cotton, and pulls to the side, exposing your weeping pussy to both of them, glistening in the evening light. "Look at you, sweet girl. All wet and ready for us?" You whimper, staring at John between your knees, no doubt shocked. Scandalized. "Isn't she pretty?" He nods.
"Very." He reaches, and you flinch when his fingers trace down your slit, but Simon holds your hips still. "Need some attention, eh? Little thing, already swollen." He flits back up to your bud, pressing next to where Simon has a thumb on you, and they work in circles, both swirling, your hips jerking with each cycle.
John pulls away, it's a slow game, this one. One they've played before, and he stays focused between your legs, letting Simon lead you, submerge you in the experience, plunge you into it. He applies more pressure, enjoying your gasps, the way you grip his shoulder.
He's almost there, almost got you, and then-
"Daddy-" John smiles. So does Simon. He pushes a finger in your hole, searching for that spot, the soft one that makes you scream, heel of his palm firm against your clit. "Ah, fuck, p-please-"
"You're so wet, mama. Soakin' my hand. Do you need to cum? Want to show the captain the way your pussy flutters?" You moan, head tipped back, pulse throbbing in your neck. You tighten around his finger, and he draws back to slide in two, carefully stretching, sawing you wide. Your knees try to close, probably on instinct, but John pushes them open again. When you hold them there, he murmurs low.
"Good girl. Keep em open for me. Want to watch your hole, see how it's going to take my cock." A shudder rocks you, muscles in your lower belly tensing, and your spine curls forward, fingers knotted in the collar of Simon's shirt.
"There it is, good, mama, that's so good. c'mon-" You squeeze, and squeeze him, and then explode, crying out, legs shaking, chasing the pressure, carnal lust glittering in your eyes.
Simon doesn't give you a reprieve. Your sopping cunt cries on his hand as he pulls free, and they both move, John's cock coming free from his pants, thick, tip red and leaking, and he slaps it against your clit. You're still dazed from the orgasm, gripping onto Simon, and he pulls you against his chest, hands behind your knees, folding you open. Your pussy flowers for Johnny, blooming for them both. Simon's so hard he aches, and he manages to shuck his pants down, cock hard against your back.
It occurs to him, John might want to have a taste of you. Drink from you, enjoy how sweet you are. "Let's get this off." He curls you forward, and tugs at your dress, deliciously pleased when you help the effort, arms twisting behind your back to try to free your heavy tits. He shifts you so you're more on his thigh, cock straining against your hip. He groans when he brushes your nipples, dots of liquid beading, slick honey spilling over the curve of your breasts. He squeezes them, making eye contact with John, who licks his lips.
John dips his head, you jerk back into Simon. "Easy," he coos, hand firm on your belly, "John's gonna have a taste. Don't want this all to go to waste, d'you? Don't wanna be selfish sweet girl." His captain's mustache brushes against the sensitive skin, mouth closing around your nipple and sucking, a sensation you seem to enjoy, because you tip your head back on Simon's shoulder and groan.
"Oh, oh. God." John's jaw connects with Simon's fingers, where he's still helping squeeze you into his mouth, and he reaches between your legs, feeling for the weight of his captain's cock, giving him a firm squeeze before lining him up with your entrance. He pulls off your breast with a satisfying pop, mustache wet, chin glistening.
He pushes, slowly, and your muscles go solid, legs instinctively shifting. John grips the back of your thigh, burrowing into the fat there, still forcing his way inside you. They're both so much bigger than you, wider than your pussy allows, longer than you should be able to stretch. "Relax, love." He coaches, pulling out to only batter his way back in, and Simon's hand roams between your legs, feeling the curve of your hole struggling to take his captain, stroking up his length to feel how much is left. You're panting, squirming, and John laughs, echo of a chuckle pulling a smile from Simon.
"J-John." You gasp, cunt stretched tight, and when his pelvis meets your ass, the tears spill over your cheeks. "It's t-too much, you're-"
"Fuckin' hell." He snarls, snapping in and out, bending at the waist to close his mouth over your nipple, big hands cradling your thighs. It's nasty, foul, the slick slap of his balls swinging into you, the wet sound filling the air over your wild moans. Simon plays with your clit, sloshing over and over it, holding you steady as you writhe. Your second orgasm approaches like a freight train, so fast, so violent, and Simon urges you on.
"Cum on my captain's cock, honey. Yeah, that's it- let him feel it." Your toes curl and you explode, squeezing so tight John has to seal his hips to you to keep himself inside.
"Christ." He curses, and Simon smoothes a hand over your forehead.
"Such a good girl, huh? Never felt anything better." He coos, kissing your temple, John grunting out an agreement of sorts, grinding in a circle before pulling long and spearing you open again, bucking into your cunt like a wild animal. Your tits bounce with him, eyes closed and pretty mouth parted, Simon licking inside, dribbling spit onto your tongue that you swallow, again and again, until John's pace becomes frantic, and he bites out a demand.
"Ask your daddy if I can give you my cum, love." You're delirious, overwhelmed and greedy now, pliant with two orgasms and promises of more.
"Daddy, daddy, p-please, can he... can he?" You manage the bumpy plea between bounces.
"Y'want him to pump you full of cum, mama? Want him to give it to you?"
"Y-yeah, yeah. Give it to me." John's jaw is gnashed so tight, Simon can see the muscle flexing, and he slams into you, shoving you further into his arms.
"Here it comes, fuck-." He snarls, and then he shoves forward once more, head tipped back, gladiator in his glory, battle won.
He pulls away, cock slipping free, covered in you, curly hair at the root soaked, chest heaving as he catches his breath. Simon tucks his fingers inside, feeling the mess of his captain's load, scooping some out and bringing it to your lips. "Suck, honey. Lick 'em clean f'me." You do, wrapping your tongue around them, swallowing hungrily with half lidded eyes.
"Sit rep?" John grunts.
"Y'okay mama?" He palms your belly.
"Mhmm." You're suspended in a dream, voracious appetite soothed.
"Need you to take more, sweet girl. Can you do that?" He will honor it, if you say no. Clean you up and get you home, tucked into bed-
but you nod, blinking, and John smacks your ass. "Up, then." He pulls you onto all fours, massive hands pulling your cheeks up and apart, exposing your tight little furl to both of them. Simon glances over, and John sucks into the pocket of his cheek. He follows suit, and-
they spit onto your asshole, shiny, iridescent globs coating it, soaking it, slipping down to where you're leaking strings of John's cum. He thumbs your ring, pushing, testing, slowly sinking inside as you twitch and try to push him out. "Gonna take this one day." It's a promise for another time, and you turn over your shoulder, eyes wide. "Gonna stretch your little asshole out with my cock, mama."
"Simon-" Your voice borders on cautionary.
"Not tonight." John stands, sinking to his knees on the opposite of the couch, half hard cock starting to fill as it looms in front of your face, and Simon lines himself up from behind, impaling you on his cock in one swift thrust, jerking your hips back to meet his.
You scream. Mouth open wide, and at the same time, John shoves forward, cock finding purchase in your mouth, hands cradling your jaw. "Easy, pretty girl." He strokes your cheek, natural rhythm of Simon fucking you deep forcing you on and off John's length, soft turning quickly to hard, stretching back towards your throat.
"Fuck, mama. Feel so fuckin' good. So wet, full of cum already." You're still so tight, so warm, soaking him to the bone. Your pussy squelches around him, and you jerk back to meet him, hips rolling as much as you can stand it, sharp moans vibrating from the back of your tongue. "Not gonna last." He warns.
"Me either," John's biceps are strained, corded muscle looping all the way to his wrists. "Mouth's so good on 'er. Gonna fill you up from both ends tonight, love." You're crying now, Simon can hear the change in your tone, the way your voice breaks, and it only makes him fuck you harder, desperate, primal urges roaring to life in the back of his mind.
"Gonna put it deep, mama. Give y'another baby." You clench. "You like that? Want daddy to fuck another baby into you?" You make some sort of sound, unintelligible, but it doesn't matter. "We won't know who's it is. Could end up with John's baby, yeah? Get nice and fat with him inside you. Belong to both of us." he groans it, thrusting and thrusting until he's slamming into you and so is John, both men sweating, grunting, gripping onto you like their lives depend on it.
It doesn't take much more than that before Simon is curling over your back, chest pressed against you, arm snaked between your legs. He pulls you into another orgasm with him, your thighs clamped around his arm, and John holds you up by the shoulders, spilling down your throat as Simon floods your womb.
The silence that follows is old hat, but new with you. John disappears to grab water, warm, wet wash cloths, and Simon rocks you on the couch, holding you tight, kissing every spare inch of your skin. "Did so good for me, mama." You sigh, cozying closer, and when John kneads your thigh, you spread them, allowing him to wipe between your legs, clean you as best he can, before settling on the other side.
They stay like that, for a while. In the quiet, the sound of your breathing, before Simon manages to get your dress over your head and to the door.
There's no goodbye.
There never is.
2K notes · View notes
nanaslutt · 10 months
Note
Lol I just keep thinking about perv!geto taking her on a proper date for once lmao
PervyRoomate!Geto x reader
note: i have a running series of perv!geto u can find here // but you can read this w/ out context :3
Contains: fem reader, sex toys, exhibitionism, sexual tension, teasing, possessive!Suguru, fingering, car shenanigans, humiliation, degradation, praise, an unhealthy amount of dirty talk, Suguru has a big dick, nipple play, panty stealing, talk of masturbation, belly bulge if you squint, creampie,
MDNI
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ
A knock was rapped on your wooden door, interrupting a very important part of the drama you were currently watching. "What?" You yelled from your bed, not taking your eyes off the messy breakup scene in front of you. Your door squeaked open to reveal a handsome Suguru, looking too dressed up at 3pm on a Friday. He wasn't adorned in anything particularly fancy, but you weren't really used to seeing him in anything other than grey joggers and some band t-shirt.
You gave him a quick one over, admiring the black slacks that fit his thighs too well, the white button-up shirt he had tucked into them, and a like-new looking belt that was half on, as his fingers made quick work to thread the prong through the belt hole. "What are you doing? I told you I was taking you out tonight." He said, raising his eyebrows. It's not that you looked bad, but you weren't exactly ready for five-star cuisine in your booty shorts and tank top. "Riiight.. are you ready to go? or?" You asked, looking around the room in confusion before your eyes landed on his.
When he finished looping the belt through the buckle, he crossed his arms and leaned against his doorframe, smirking at you. "Get that disgusting look off your face," you cringed at him, pushing your laptop aside as you pulled your body up to sit crisscross on your bed. "I'm not taking you to McDonalds baby." He laughed, confusing you even more. "Okayy.. so where are we going?" you asked. You fully expected him to name some sit-down diner that was one or two marks fancier than a Mcdonald's, but you weren't expecting him to name the most expensive and highly rated restaurant in town.
Your mouth fell agape as you stood watching the dark-haired man in the doorway laugh at you. "Don't take offense to this, but you're not exactly the most wealthy person I know." You said, still looking at him in disbelief. "If Gojo asked me out to this place, sure, that might sound a little more realis-" "Don't talk about that idiot taking you out in front of me." Geto interrupted, uncrossing his legs as he shoved his hands in his pockets and closed his eyes, giving you a smile that did little to cover up his animosity.
Ever since you and Geto had started fucking around pretty regularly, you have noticed a change in his demeanor whenever Gojo would hit on you. It wasn't like it was anything new, Gojo has been hitting on you for years, for as long as Geto has been bringing him around, you think. Before you and Suguru started hooking up, whenever Gojo would flirt with you he would brush the white-haired man off for the most part, maybe give him a scoff or incredulous look if his attempt at a pickup line was really that horrid on the ears.
Recently though, whenever Gojo tried to hit on you, or his touch would linger a little longer than it should, Geto was quick to intervene. Putting himself between the two of you physically, or butting into the conversation to shut down his attempts. Geto knew you weren't interested in Gojo in the slightest, but he couldn't help but feel that greed-eyed monster of jealousy bubble up inside him whenever you laughed a little too hard at his jokes, or in this case, brought him up in conversation unprovoked.
"Sorry~ Didnt realize he was such a sore subject for you.." You teased, "Unriquitted love, maybe?" He knew you were trying to push his buttons, but you weren't far off. Just not in the way you were thinking, because he sure as hell wasn't interested in Gojo like that either. He sighed, before gripping something in his pocket and pulling it out of his pants, keeping it concealed in his fist.
"Anyways, I don't even know what I would wear to this place!" You said exasperated, glancing over to rake your eyes through your closet to see if anything caught your eye. Without making a sound, Geto slipped out of the room and quickly returned with a dark red bag, tossing it into your lap and landing it perfectly between your crossed legs. You peeked inside the bag and saw some sort of black fabric, you crunched your eyebrows together, looking back up at him. "Wear that." He said, his smirk returning to his face.
Your lips dropped open slightly, a small gap being created between your lips. "Sugu.. If you robbed a bank you know I would never tell anyone.. right?" You said, all too seriously. The man burst out in laughter, "Fuck! I'm not as broke as you think!" He spoke through his laughter, holding his hand over his chest. "Just got a raise at work is all, couldn't think of a better way to spend my first fat check." He crossed his arms again, keeping the one fist balled up as he did so.
"Oh shit, congratulations Sugu! I'm actually not a great liar so I probably would've told someone about the whole robbing a bank thing." You said, clicking your tongue, "Sorry." He giggled at your words, rolling his eyes. "Oh, I know." He spoke, watching your face beam as you pulled out the beautiful black dress he bought you. "Oh yeah, bought just the thing to wear with that too." He smiled in faux innocence, unballing his fist he dangled a pair of skimpy, black lace panties in front of him.
They weren't just any panties though, you could see on the crotch of those panties that would be pressed against your cunt, a flat teardrop-shaped silicone vibrator adorned the fabric. Your jaw really dropped now as you stared at the piece in disbelief. He wasn't really expecting you to wear remote-controlled panties in the fanciest restaurant in town, right? "Pretty, huh?" His voice filled the room when you didn't react. "You never change, huh?" You sighed, holding your hand out in front of you as he tossed the panties over to where you sat.
A big part of you thought this was a horrible idea, knowing how sensitive you are, but another, less rational part of you couldn't help but get excited at the thought of Suguru having full control of getting you off with a little remote control in his pocket, while the two of you dined in the fanciest atmosphere you had yet to immerse yourself in. "Pervert." You said, looking up at him under your lashes as you stretched the panties between your fingers, admiring how well made they were.
Suguru giggled, walking over to the bed you sat on, his knees bumping into the mattress as he reached out and took the panties away from you. "Hey-" "Need some help putting them on?" He asked, twirling them around on his finger. You scoffed, "Suguru, why would I need help putting on a pair of panties, just-" You tried and failed to snatch them back from his hands as he yanked them out of your reach. "You sure?" He said, continuing to twirl them as he started to back out of the room with a mischievous grin on his face. You threw your hand up in the air in defeat, giving him a 'what the hell' look before he closed the door behind him on the way out.
"How am I supposed to wear them tonight if you just kidnapped them!!" You yelled through the door, hearing his footsteps descend further away from you. With a heavy sigh, you pushed yourself off of your comfortable mattress and began getting ready for the night ahead of you.
--
Smoothing out your dress in the mirror, you turned your body around and checked out your own ass in the mirror, and lord was it an ass to behold. It's like Suguru had taken your measurements in the middle of the night to make sure this dress absolutely fitted your figure in the most flattering way; honestly, you wouldn't be surprised if he did. You absolutely wouldn't be mad that's for sure. You had done up your hair and face and adorned your feet with the nicest pair of black heels you owned. You looked absolutely perfect to the unknowing eye.. the only thing missing? Your panties. The absence of something hugging you down there made you feel a little vulnerable, but otherwise, you felt perfect.
After a quick one-over to make sure everything was as it should be on your figure, you stepped out of your room, shutting off the lights and closing the door as you left. Your heels clicked on the wooden floor as you made your way into the living room, where Geto had splayed himself out on your shared couch. His big thighs spread wide on the cushions, his arms spread out behind him on the back of the couch. He looked edible; the way his pecs were pressed tightly against his shirt from how he was stretching his arms apart made you want to pounce on him and play with his massive chest; who was the pervert now?
Right when you finished checking the man out, he noticed your presence, tilting his head to the side, his eyes doubled in size, his eyebrows raising to make room for them. He let his head fall back on the couch, a grin spreading across his face as he raked his eyes over your body before his eyes settled on yours, giving you a whistle. "Yeah, I chose the right dress, you look fucking edible." He complimented, licking his bottom lip before he briefly took it into his mouth.
"Wait till you see my ass." You teased, placing your hand on your hip and tipping your head at him. "Oh yeah?" Geto raised an eyebrow challengingly. Tipping his chin down he stood from his spot on the couch, heavy steps walking over to where you stood in the entrance of the living room. He stuck his hand out to you, signaling for you to grab it. "Give me a spin baby," Geto whispered into the quiet room, the tv playing some unimportant show in the background as you placed your hand in his. He lifted your arm, slowly spinning you around, making sure to get a good look at your ass in the dress.
He whisted again, "Oh yeah~ fucking perfect." He said, spinning you back around to face him again as he released your hand and fished for something in his pocket. "Only missing one thing~" He said, raising his eyebrows at you knowingly. "Yeah, gimmie that shit, feels weird with nothing down there." You said, holding your hand out to him. "Nuh-uh," He said, tsking at you. You scrunched your eyebrows at him in annoyance. Though he didn't give you much time to pout as he dropped on one knee, opening up the leg holes of the panties for you to step in as his eyes watched your expression from the floor.
You felt your face heat up, this position was so intimate it flustered you. "H-huh?" was the only thing you could muster. "C'mon, we gotta get going if we wanna make out reservation on time." He cooed, nodding his head at you. "Do I just-" You started, raising your heel-clad foot from the floor as you poked it into the hole of the panties. "Mhm.. and here I thought you said you didn't need any help putting your panties on?" He teased, washing away some of your embarrassment as it was replaced with irritation.
You kept quiet, stepping into the other hole of the panties and letting him slide the material up your body teasingly. He rose from his position on the floor, standing in front of you in his entirety as he kept his eyes on his hands, where he was moving the cloth up your body. The dress was being bunched up to your mid-thigh, and would soon rest on your hips the higher he dragged the panties up. Once he saw your cunt come into view, the panties only centimeters from touching your throbbing clit, he gazed back up into your eyes, watching your reaction closely.
You swallowed whatever saliva was still in your day mouth, keeping your eyes on his. He watched your eyes flutter, your nose sucking in a breath as he pulled the panties up to your hips, the cold silicone being pressed against your cunt and creating a delicious friction between your legs. Smirking, Suguru slid your dress back down your thighs and smoothed it out before placing his hands on the small of your waist and caressing the skin there. You placed your hands on his chest, feeling yourself throb between your legs with the added pressure and the intensity in which he was staring at you.
"How's that feel?" He said, sliding his hands up and down the sides of your body before sliding his hands to your ass and gripping the fat there, simultaneously pressing your body closer to his, his knee sliding between yours and making the dress wrinkle at the bottom. "Feels good." You nod. Geto tilted his head down, looking between your lips and eyes as one of his hands left your waist to dig in his pockets, out of your view. "Yeah?" He said, licking his lips. "Let's just make sure everything is in working order before we go, yeah?" He whispered agaisnt your lips, neither of you daring to close the distance.
The tension was thick in the air when you nodded, the man in front of you mimicking your nod, whispering a quiet yeah. Your breath hitched in your throat, your legs wobbling slightly when you felt the soft vibration tickle against your clit. Geto's jaw dropped as he watched your reaction to the toy buzzing against your sensitive bud. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head before closing completely when he upped the intensity of the vibrations. "It hittin' the right spot?" He asked, leaning in to whisper against your neck when you tipped it back.
"You let him pull your body tighter against his own, his knee pressing against the toy against your cunt, increasing the feeling as you let your jaw drop, moaning quietly into the air as he left soft, barely-there kisses against your throat. "Y-yes, it's on the right spot." You confirmed. Your legs felt like jello at the stimulation combined with how palpable the tension filling the room was. "Vibrating on 'ur little clit?" You knew he knew how much his voice turned you on, and fuck was it turning you on. "Yes," you whimpered breathily, squeezing your thighs around his larger one between your legs.
"Bet it feels so good." He said, biting your neck gently before pulling away to look at your face, expression painted with lust. You just gave him a nod, gasping as you started to rock yourself on his thigh. "Oh~ Horny girll~" He teased, pulling his body back to watch you hump slowly along his toned thigh. Just when you were falling into a rhythm, the buzzing stopped. When you cracked your eyes open to scold him, you were met with a cocky-looking Geto, smiling mischievously at you. You sighed, realizing how the rest of the night was going to go.
"Oh my, look at the time!" He said dramatically, holding the expensive watch Gojo got him for his most recent birthday out in front of him. "There are no batteries in that watch, Suguru." You call him out, deadpanning. "I'm all-knowing, I don't need a watch to tell me we're going to be late if we don't leave now." He said, patting your ass before he pulled away, you instantly missed the pressure his knee brought between your thighs.
--
The ride to the restaurant was short but dreadful. He had kept his warm hand on your thigh the entire time, rubbing his thumb teasingly against the inside of your leg, slowly rubbing higher and higher, making you think he was going to touch you, but he ultimately pulled away. You kept waiting to feel the vibration against your clit, but it never came. You just throbbed pathetically with no relief in sight during the ten-or-so-minute drive, although your increased arousal made it feel like hours.
He patted his hand on your thigh when he parked the car, turning his head to look at your hot and bothered face, giving you a charming smile before killing the engine and sliding out of his driver's seat, ordering you not to move before he shut the door. Your roommate popped open your door, holding his hand out for you to help you out of the car. "Such a gentleman." You said, half sarcastically. He smirked, closing the door behind you. He felt his heard skip a beat when you laced your arm with his as the two of you made a short stroll towards the establishment.
Even the outside of the building called you poor in twenty different languages. It was lit up beautifully, the tinted windows giving you a little peek at the rich interior of the building. "You nervous?" He asked as the two of you approached the door. "A little, I've never been somewhere so fancy before." You replied honestly. "Yeah? Just stay close to me, all you gotta do is stay on my arm and look pretty." He cooed.
Geto's confidant demeanor made you hot in the face and other places. You felt like a trophy he was showing off to the world, his confidence rubbing off on you as the two of you walked into the establishment. You approached the man in the front, dressed in a full suit, taking reservation names before you were seated. Geto didn't miss the way the blonde young man blushed as he gave you a one-over, admiring your body before clearing his throat and asking Geto for the name on the reservation. You were too busy looking around the establishment to notice the man's glances, but you did feel Geto's arm squeeze tighter around yours.
"R-right this way." He said, bowing his arm in front of him before starting a trail to the semi-secluded table he would bring you to. The lights hanging above the tables were dim and elegant, it felt strangely warm and comfortable, making you relax your shoulders. "I think our host has a little crush on you~" Geto whispered into your ear, making you jolt out of your daze. "H-huh?" You said, looking up at the dark-haired man in confusion. "You really are so oblivious." He said, giggling, "Someone might try to eat you up one day, you should be more aware." His word irritated you for some reason, but then again, everything he did irritated you.
"Asshole, I'm self-aware. Not everyone is a pervert like you." You spat, averting your gaze to the back of the host boy as you continued your pace to the table. "You'd be surprised." Was the last thing Geto said before the host stopped in front of you, raising his arm out to the table, signaling the two of you to sit. "Thank you." You said to the host, your eye contact making the young man blush as he nodded and said a quick, "My pleasure." before leaving.
"Oh, he's so into you." Geto giggled, sliding into the booth. The seating he gave you looked to be the most beautiful in the restaurant. He had sat you in the corner of the room, a beautiful vintage-looking red light hung between the two of you, the window immediately to your left giving you a view of the Holiday-esc decorated street, twinkling with white lights and garland. You ignored his comment, taking in the scenery as you relaxed into the comfortable cushion, almost forgetting about the toy hiding inside your panties.
"It's so beautiful, Suguru." You said. He fully expected you to curse him out for the comment about the host, so when he received this response instead he was quite taken aback. At that moment he felt his heart race in his chest, but simultaneously a feeling of sadness crept over him. He wished he could afford to take you to places like this more often. Maybe if you were with someone like Satoru, you would get to experience this more. "Suguru?" You called out to him, tilting your head at his far away look.
"Sorry," He replied, being snapped out of his stupor, looking back to you. You looked so beautiful under the dim glow of the red-tinted lights, he wanted to lean across the table and take your lips against his. "It is beautiful." He agreed. You still felt like something was off, but his mood didn't seem odd enough to ruin the night, so you let it be for now. "What made you want to take me here?" You asked, glancing through the wine menu in front of you. He smirked at you, "What, you don't like it? I thought it was beautiful." He teased.
You kicked his shin gently under the table. "Don't be dumb, of course I like it. I've just never been to a place with a set menu before.. and I don't think you have either." You smiled at him. "I've been to a place like this with Satoru before, just once, It seemed like somewhere you deserve to be taken." He answered honestly, grabbing the wine menu to look at himself when you slid it across the wite tablecloth. His words made you blush, you silently thanked the owner of the restaurant for choosing the red lights, it was saving you the embarrassment of Geto pointing out your flushed face.
"I appreciate the sentiment, but you know I love this just as much as when you take me to get McDonald's you know." You giggled. You were sure if anyone around you had heard the comparison of this establishment to a place light McDonalds, their heads might screw off in astonishment. Your words eased the self consciousness in his chest, only you would say something like that. "Plus, I might start acting spoiled if I don't be careful about coming to places like this." You giggled, making him smile.
"What if I want you to be spoiled?" He responded, his tone making you squeeze your thighs together under the table. "You spoil me enough, Suguru." You respond, your sultry voice uttering his name made his pants feel tight. The mood was quickly shifting from romantic to a more lust-filled one. "Yeah?" He responded, slipping his hand into his pant pocket to find the remote connected to the panties, just rubbing his thumb around the button. You nodded, poking his shin with the tip of your heel under the table, your flirty ministrations being hidden by the long white tablecloth.
"How so?" He asked, tilting his head as he pressed the on button of the vibrator, sending a dull vibration against your clit. He watched your eyes flutter at the stimulation, humming out a "hmm?" when he did so. "You're spoiling me r-right now. Always thinking of ways to make me f-feel good." You replied, taking deep breaths to ensure a whine wouldn't slip out. "Am I?" He replied, leaning back against the booth, upping the vibration with the remote in his pants as he watched you jerk forward.
"Suguru-" You wined quietly, biting your lip as you squeezed your thighs together. "Feel good when you cross your legs, baby?" He whispered, leaning his forearms on the table as he tried to look at your expression from your head tipped forward, eyes shut at the intensity. You didn't know how he knew you were crossing your legs, but you nodded in response anyway. "The waiter is coming baby, pull yourself together." He whispered before sitting back, averting his gaze from you as he watched a new man approach your table. You grit your teeth in irritation, if he really wanted you to 'pull yourself together' he would stop the toy.
You swallowed hard, trying to take steady deep breaths into your lungs, smiling at the nice-looking waiter as he approached the table. "What do you want to drink, honey~" He cooed, egging you on by using the ridiculous pet name. The moment you opened your mouth to speak, he upped the vibration twice, making your body jerk forward. Of course, the waiter just had to ask if you were alright. "Yeah, you alright?" Geto chimed in, hiding his smile with faux concern on his face. You waved your hands in front of yourself, "Hiccups." You said, trying to muster up a smile as you glared at the dark-haired man across the table from you.
"Ill order, we'll take the-" Geto's voice faded out as he interacted with the waitor as you bit your tongue, your stomach clenching at each vibration, feeling yourself drip into the panties. You placed your elbow on the table when the man walked away, squeezing your eyes shut you covered your mouth, moans occasionally being muffled against your hand. "Fuck, that was so hot." Geto laughed, feeling himself twitch in his pants. You looked up at him once you cracked your eyes open again, eyebrows scrunched together in pleasure as your thighs squeezed tightly against one another.
"I'll give you a break." He said, reaching into his pocket he switched off the remote, making your muscles unclench as your hand fell from your mouth, gasping as quietly as you could into the air. Geto pulled the tablecloth over his lap so he could grope himself over his pants without anyone seeing him act so indecently. You had no smart remarks left in your brain, you weren't sure if Geto knew how close you had just been to cumming in front of the waitor, but with how breathless he looked you thought he might've had some idea.
You were the one with a toy pressed against your most sensitive spot right now, but just from seeing your reactions alone, Geto was feeling all hot and bothered. Every time you inhaled sharply or your body jerked, he felt his cock leak into his boxers. "Is this okay?" He asked, continuing to rub his cock slowly, giving himself some sort of relief. You nodded, your expression very obviously coated in lust.
"Good, this shit is making me so hard you know that?" He confessed, looking into your eyes. You forced a smile through the arousal, "Maybe next time, you should be the one with a vibrator on your cock." You teased, making him laugh through a groan. "Yeah, might have to let me borrow those panties when you're done here." You clenched your thighs together at the thought of a big strong Suguru with dainty panties pressed against his hard cock, undoubtedly most of his length would be poking out through the top of the panties, and that just fueled your arousal even more.
"Suguru." You wined, covering your mouth once more, he tilted his head at you, feeling you run your leg up his shin, teasing higher and higher as you stroked your heel-clad foot on his thigh, making him hiss in a breath, abandoning the hand on his cock and placing it on the cushion next to him. "Turn it on." You said from behind your hand, looking into his eyes with half-lidded ones. The way you were getting so into this made his face feel hot, his cock twitching under his pants when he felt the tip of your heel press softly against his balls.
He listened to your instruction, switching the vibration on once more, you sucked in a breath, continuing to rub your foot against his crotch. "So naughty." He giggled through his arousal, watching you swallow hard at how good the vibration felt. "Your wine," A voice came out of nowhere, catching the two of you off guard as the waitor seemed to appear out of thin air, filling your glass with the red liquid before repeating the same to Geto. Your heart was racing out of your chest, quickly you snapped out of whatever horny trance you had been in, retracting your foot from Geto's crotch you crossed your legs once more.
Geto smiled at you as you watched the waitor pour the wine, feeling the throbbing in his pants intensify with the loss of your foot on his cock. "Came to your senses?" Geto giggled, switching off the vibrator so you could relax once more. You blushed, embarrassed about how shameless you had just been. You had almost completely forgotten you were in public. "You make me lose them." You said, the vein on your forehead popping out at his audacity. He laughed, reaching over the table to take your hand in his, stroking his thumb over the back of your hand.
You welcomed the feeling, feeling your irritation wash away. "Sorry, truly, didn't mean to embarrass you, sweetheart." He said, smiling more authentically at your face, still screwed in annoyance. You sighed, his charm melting away your annoyance, "It's fine, dude came outta fuckin' nowhere." You complained, pouting. Geto laughed, "I didn't notice him either, sneaky bastard." His shared animosity made you laugh, easing your nerves as the two of you fell into a comfortable conversation.
The rest of the dinner had gone smoothly, the two of you almost completely forgetting about the vibrating panties as you immersed yourself in the conversation, that was until the desert was brought out. Vanilla ice cream and some fancy-looking dessert next to it, looking too pretty to eat. The both of you thanked the waiter, plastering smiles on your faces until he walked out of view. "Suguru I cant do it." "Fuck I'm so glad you said something, I need to take my belt off before I explode.. and it's not for the reason it normally is when I'm with you." He said seriously, making you laugh.
"This place is so expensive though, I feel bad just leaving this here untouched." You said, raking your eyes over the dessert. "Don't force yourself." He said, rubbing his hand over his bloated tummy. There had been 5 courses, they weren't relatively big alone, but after eating so many little dishes you were feeling like you were at your limit. They had all brought flavors you had never tasted before and never thought you would taste, so you couldn't help but think the same would be true about this desert, you didn't want to miss out.
"If you feed me I think I can do it." You teased, sticking your tongue out for the man in front of you. "Fuck." He laughed, feeling his now semi-hard cock twitch to life in his pants. "Might need to take my belt off for that other reason soon." Geto huffed out a laugh, making you giggle with your tongue out as he scooped some of the vanilla ice cream onto the spoon. "Ahhh~" He said, making you repeat the noise as he placed the spoon in your mouth and focused on your plush-looking lips that wrapped around the spoon and licked the cold cream off the spoon.
He pulled it back, sliding the spoon upwards to make sure you swallowed up everything. When he pulled it away, he noticed some of the white liquid smear against your bottom lip, his cock twitched with interest at how similar it looked to another white substance he frequently saw on your lips. Wordlessly he reached across the table and wiped his thumb against your lip, collecting the white liquid and bringing it back to his own mouth, licking it off.
You felt your heart speed up, a pulse could be felt between your legs as you watched him take his own thumb into his mouth and suck sensually, all while keeping his eyes locked onto yours, before popping it out of his mouth. "Sweet." He said. You felt your lip quiver, taking in a shaky breath you whispered. "Get the check." The man stood without another word, opening his wallet, he slapped a couple twenties onto the white cloth before tucking it back into his pants and grabbing your hand, dragging you out of the booth. "Pre-paid." He said, holding the small of your waist as he led the two of you to the entrance of the restaurant.
You looked down at Geto's slacks as the two of you made quick work to exit. The bulge in his pants was very evident to anyone with a pair of working eyes, glancing up at his face he seemed like he couldn't care less as he kept his sights on the trail in front of him. The two of you walked right past the young blonde man who had led you to your table. The man's face turned a deep shade of crimson when Geto grabbed a handful of your ass and looked back to wink at the boy, undoubtably his own pants had tented at the shameless display of Geto's claim on you.
The cold air felt relieving once the two of you made it outside, easing the burning heat your cheeks were experiencing. "I wanted to treat you like a lady tonight but you make me lose control when I'm around you, know that?" He confessed, keeping his eyes glued in front of him as his car came into view. "Were the vibrating panties part of you treating me like a lady?" You teased, looking up at him. "Maybe not, saw them in the window of some sex shop on the way home last night." He said, finally reaching the car. He gave your ass one last squeeze before he opened the door for you and helped you inside.
"Cant help it, just wanna slut you out every chance I get." He said, winking at you before he shut the door softly, leaving you flustered as you crossed your hands in your lap, waiting for him to enter the car. You gasped when you felt the vibration start up suddenly, moments later Geto's door popped open and he slid inside, keeping the car off as he shut the door behind him. Leaning into your face, he placed his hand on the side of your soft cheek, "Cmere baby." He whispered before he connected your lips together.
You moaned against his lips, his other hand coming to rub against your clothed cunt, pressing the vibrator harder against you. He was panting into the kiss, the exchange was filled with teeth and tongue as he devoured you with his lips. Your hands came up to wrap around his wrist that held your face, making him hum against your lips. Your moans into the kiss increased in volume as he frantically rubbed back and forth against the vibrator, simultaneously making the silicone rub your clit, creating a heavenly feeling.
"Want you to cum right here in my car before we leave, need to see you cum." Geto panted against your lips, making you wine. He was throbbing in his pants, there was nothing he needed more in this moment than to see you fall apart on his fingers and the vibrator he got you, wearing the dress he bought you. You moaned into the kiss, tangling your tongue with his as you felt your orgasm creep up on you alarmingly fast. You dug your nails into his wrist, arching your back your legs spread themselves apart instinctually as you teetered on the edge of your orgasm.
"Sug-uru- Sugu-" You moaned his name breathlessly against his lips, he knew you were about to cum. He kept the same pace and pressure against you as your hips started bucking into his hand to get yourself there. "Take it baby- take it cmon-" He whispered against your lips. He moved his kisses to the side of your mouth and cheek when you became unable to kiss him back, your jaw going slack as the dam broke and you came hard against the vibrator.
His hand gripped your thigh hard, his nails digging into the fat as he moaned with you as you came. He felt lightheaded watching your body jerk and spasm in his hold. "Yeah, that's my girl~ good fucking girl~" He praised, continuing to rub your clit as he worked you through the last shocks of your orgasm. Once you came down from your high and your brain started functioning regularly again, you registered his words in your head. 'my girl' the words echoed over and over in your head.
Surely those words were only uttered from the heat of the moment, but it sure as hell sounded nice rolling off his tongue. You pushed his hand away in overstimulation as the vibration continued, making you twitch against the car seats. "Sorry baby, I got you." He whispered, pulling away from your face he reached into his pocket and switched the vibrator off. "I feel better now." He said, making you come to your senses as you giggled. "You?" You said incredulously. "It makes me feel good to make you cum, you should know that by now." He said honestly.
You believed his words wholeheartedly. His cock was still rock hard and twitching in his pants but he did look more relieved than he did when he first pulled you into the car. His breath had evened out too. "Want me to suck you off while you drive us home?" You asked, glancing between his hard-on poking through his pants and his handsome face. He laughed, "Such a vulgar mouth you have, roomie." He teased, grabbing your face he squshed your cheeks together, shaking your head back and forth. "I plan to fuck you nice and good when we get home if that sounds okay with you, so I can wait."
You nodded frantically, he didn't have to look over at you to know your answer, your head shaking his arm with the intensity with which you nodded. "You're so sweet, yknow that?" He said, his words catching you off guard. "Why are you bein' so sappy? Got a crush on me?" You joked, not expecting the silence that followed as he released your face as started the car, signaling before he pulled out into the dark street, heading for your shared apartment.
You looked over to Geto's face and noticed a light blush dusting his cheeks every time he drove under a streetlight, illuminating his features. You suddenly felt very self-conscious, your own cheeks heating up the longer he took to respond. "Oh." You said, turning your body to face the street as you gazed out through the window. "I'm not asking you to like me back sweet cheeks, just keep hanging out with me and I'll survive." He said.
Your heart was racing, you felt dizzy and slightly nauseous. It made sense that he liked you, the two of you had been living together for years, you spent more time with him more than anyone else you knew, and you had been hooking up for a couple of months now, it made sense that he had feelings for you. It's not like his feelings weren't reciprocated, you started noticing your heart pick up around him a couple months ago, right after the two of you started hooking up.
You had chalked it up to being arousal or lust, noticing how the strange feeling became stronger when he touched you or spoke to you. You realized quickly that this was not just lust, you were in fact very in love with your roommate. He did look like he had been chiseled by the gods themselves, and he had a lovely (for the most part) personality to match, he was funny, he cared about your well-being, he took care of you when you were sick, cuddled with you, gave you the dick of your life- he was everything you could've ever wanted and more.
"Can you say something though, you're making me feel embarrassed." His voice broke through the deafening silence, breaking you out of your stupor. You didn't realize the two of you had already been driving for so long, your apartment coming into view as he pulled into the parking spot in front of your building. Say something, say something, this is your chance, say something idiot just- Geto was internally panicking, he regretted leaving his answer so ambiguous, he should've just said "Of course not~" When you asked if he liked you, fuck he was such an idiot, he just ruined your relationship he was sure of it.
Surely you wouldn't feel comfortable living in the same house with someone who was in love with you, of course, that would be uncomfortable, fuck. Was it too late to say he was joking? Shit. Maybe you would move out, god- he felt sick, he wanted to get out of the car and run away, excape this awkward atmosphere, and just-
Your lips were on his, you were kissing him, you had your hands on his thighs and you were kissing him. "Sorry." You pulled away. "I- I'm not good with this kinda stuff but I had to do something." He registered your voice speak to him. "I uh- I like you too." You blushed, looking at the scenery outside the car, counting the tiles on your building, anything to avoid his eyes. "I almost jumped out of the window, never do that shit again." He said, sighing the heaviest sigh one man has ever sighed.
You burst out into laughter, "Sorry, wasn't exactly expecting you to confess your love when I was harmlessly teasing you~" You said, squinting your eyes at him. He swallowed hard, your hands on his thighs suddenly burning with an indescribable heat against his skin. "Can I take you inside and fuck you now? Think I might die If I don't get inside you soon." he whispered into the silent car.
--
Your back slammed into the door of your apartment, muffled moans and breaths mingling between the two of you as Geto wrappped a large arm around your waist to keep you pressed against his body, his other digging in his pocket to fish out the key and get the two of you inside. "Geto-" You moaned against his lips, "Hurry." You don't think you've ever felt this hot and bothered in your life. You frantically unbuttoned his shirt, his bare chest being exposed to the open air as you made quick work of his belt while he blindly inserted the key into the door and twisted it open.
The two of you almost crashed to the ground when the door opened behind you, stumbling inside Geto slammed the door shut and locked it behind you, working his hands on the back of your dress he uncliped the hook at the top and slid the garment in one swipe off of your body, leaving you clad in just the panties. "No bra?" He breathed against your lips, feeling his hand come into contact with nothing but your skin when he instinctively went to unclasp your bra. "Thought we might end up like this~" You whispered agaisnt his lips, yanking his belt through the loops of his pants and throwing it somewhere in the room.
He lifted you from under your thighs, kissing and biting your neck frantically as he walked you to the familiar path to his room. You pressed the back of his neck agaisnt you, tangling your hands in his long hair while he kicked open his door and took long strides to the bed, throwing you down on it, making you bounce against his mattress. Geto breathed heavily, unbuttoning his pants with one hand he crawled onto the bed, slotting himself between your thighs and welcoming yours that wrapped around his as he slid his pants off in the process, leaving the both of you only clad in your undergarments.
He placed one hand on your neck and pressed you into the bed, his lips chasing yours as he kissed you needily. You made a sound of discomfort against his lips, feeling something rough on your lower back. You pulled away from the kiss briefly to reach under your back and move whatever was irritating your skin. You didn't expect to pull out a pair of your panties, stiffer than you remember them being, from behind your back, more importantly, you didn't expect to see them in Geto's bed.
"Geto I am right here," you said, deadpanning, holding the cum soaked panties to the side of you. He smiled, taking the panties from your hand he tucked them under his pillow, "You wouldn't get it~" He said, tipping your head to the side he dropped his head to your neck, moving his hand out of the way a bit so he could leave hickeys on your skin. You gasped, "N-no I don't, why keep stealing my p-panties and cumming on them when you can walk ten feet down the hall and fuck me?" You asked, your breath picking up when he kissed a particularly sensitive spot on your neck.
"It's the thrill." He says, biting your neck before soothing over the same spot with his tongue, easing the sting. "Sneaking around and stealing your panties-" kiss "when you have no idea," kiss "Gets me off so hard." He explains. "You're s-such a pervert." You whine, and yet feel yourself clench around nothing at his words. "That shit too." He says, gripping your naked tighter in his hold. "Love when you tell me how nasty I am, keep doing it." He instructs, moving his lips down to take your nipple into his mouth, flicking it with his tongue.
"Fuck- Suguru-" You moan, bucking your hips up into his, simultaneously wrapping your legs around him tighter. "Tell me, baby, tell me how dirty I am." He speaks, the words coming out muffled around your nipple, the vibration of his words tingling through your hardened bud and making you drip between your thighs. "Y-you're such a filthy pervert S-suguru." You say, immediately getting a loud groan of approval from him, his hips humping into your own, the bulge in his pants being rubbed just right against your clit.
"Yeah?" He moans, releasing your nipple with a lewd pop as he switches to the other one, sucking it into his mouth and flicking his tongue over it, feeling it harden in his mouth. "Yeah, baby- s-so nasty stealin' my panties and makin' a m-mess all over them." He groans, his hips pressing themselves harder into your panty-clad pussy. "Bet you pretend 'ur fucking my cunt huh-?" You tease, feeling his hand slide down between your legs and move the panties to the side of your pussy so he could rub his boxer-covered dick between your naked folds.
He moans out a, "mhm-" against your nipple, pulling down his boxers just enough to free his dick as he rubs his length between your folds, his wet tip bumping into your clit as he does so. "Do you w-wrap the around y-our cock o-or-" You were cut off by his fat tip pressing against the entrance of your pussy, not pushing in, just keeping pressure against the twitching hole as he nibbled on your nipple, giving it one last suck before pulling away.
"Sometimes I'll lick the part where your pussy goes 'n taste you," He starts, peppering kisses across the expanse of your chest. "Fuck.." You moan, feeling your face grow hot at his words. "Sometimes I'll hold them up to my nose 'n smell you, use 'em to jerk off-" You pressed your hand over his mouth, breathing heavily at his shameless explanation. "You really are disgusting." You said, feeling yourself clench around nothing.
Suguru released a shaky breath, feeling a tingle shoot up his spine at your mean words before he thrust his cock into your pussy in one thrust, groaning at how tight you felt around him, the sound coming out muffled from your hand pressed against his mouth. "Ohmygod-" You whined, your hand dropping from his lips and falling against the sheets to your side as you gripped the cloth between your fingers tightly.
Suguru leaned back, pulling your thighs over his larger ones and sitting on his calves, he immediately started up a brutal pace inside you, fucking his cock into you as he used one hand to hold your panties to the side, getting a perfect view of your cunt swallowing up his dick. "Your pussy is eating up my dick like it's the tastiest thing in the world~" Geto cooed, bringing the pad of his thumb to rub circles agaisnt your little clit, poking out argrilly from under the hood.
"Fuck- S-Suguru!" You moaned, thrashing your head from side to side against his pillows. "God I love how dumb you get from my dick baby~ You like it this much? Huh?" He asked, emphasizing his words with rough thrusts as he picked up his ministrations on your clit. "Yes, baby- Fuck- Fuck I love it-" You babbled, forcing yourself to peel your eyes open to watch him fuck you properly. "Yeah you do- Fuck, you're so fucking tight-" He groaned, shutting his eyes and tipping his head back as he fucked his cock into you mercilessly, drilling his fat tip straight into your g-spot.
"Can feel myself leakin' all inside your cunt-" He drops his chin to watch your sloppy cunt drip your arousal around him, "She's fuckin' milking me-" He laughs through a groan. Geto was normally talkative in bed, but he seemed to be even more aroused, you guessed it had something to do with the confession that happened earlier in the car. "Suguru- you're splitting me open-" You moan, bringing one of your hands to press down on your lower tummy, feeling his cock beat your walls from the inside of you.
He giggled, bringing one of his hands to press down over yours, making you feel it even more. "Yeah? You feel me deep in there baby? I'm all up in 'ur fuckin' guts." He laughed, pistoning his hips into yours. Your face was all screwed up in pleasure, your hips wiggling against his as you felt your orgasm build up quickly inside you. "Fuck- yes- Suguru Im gonna cum- t-think I-m gonna squirt-" You say, noticing how the ball in your stomach felt a little different than normal.
Suguru had made you squirt before, and you never got used to it. It felt so intense, and on top of that, it was so fucking embarrassing. Suguru didn't seem to think so, it always made him so fucking dizzy when he made you squirt. "Yeah? Gonna squirt for me when I cum inside you?" He cooed, his thrusts starting to lose their rhythm as he felt his balls tighten with his impending orgasm. "Yes, Sugu please- please cum inside me- mark me as y-yours-" You wined, looking into his deep eyes as you spoke.
"Fuckkk, wanna be mine?" He groaned, biting his lip as he felt his cock twitch with his orgasm approaching alarmingly fast. "Yes- make me yours!" You cried, throwing your head back as the first wave of your orgasm crashed over you. Your cunt constricted around Geto's massive cock, your squirt spraying onto his abdomen, wetting his skin and boxers he had pulled down to pull his cock out. "Ohfuck-" He moaned gritting his teeth. "Give it to me- milk this fucking c-cock-" He moaned, his jaw falling open as he felt his cum travel up his cock.
You continued to convulse on his cock as he fucked you through your orgasm and into his own. "Gonna make you mine gonna- f-fuckfuck-" He cut himself off, pressing down hard on your stomach as his hips stilled against you feeling the first rope of his cum spill inside your cunt. His eyes rolled back in his head, bringing his hips back, he fucked each and every rope of his hot cum as deep as he could into your cunt, pressing his balls flush against your ass as he spilled the last of his seed into you.
You bit your lip, trying to stay sane as he twitched through the last bit of his high, overstimulating you when his cock moved a little too much inside you. "Godddd-" He groaned, pulling his cock out as the both of you hissed in oversensitivity. His cum immediately follows his cock and drips out of your hole, spilling down the crack of your ass. "So pretty, you did so fucking good for me baby." He praised, pulling your pussy lips apart to watch his cum slide out of you.
"My," huff "eyes are up here." you breathed out with a smirk, making him huff out a laugh. "Feelin' jealous?" He teased, tucking his soaked cock back into his boxers before he leaned his massive frame over you, embracing the feeling of your legs wrapping around his waist as he cradles your face in his hands, looking between your plush lips and eyes before pressing his mouth to yours softly and pulling back. "You feelin' okay? I went kinda hard." He smiled apologetically.
Your own hands came up to hold his sweats face, brushing his bangs out of his face. "I'm a little sore, but I think I'll survive." You said, before looking away and pondering, bringing your eyes back to his after a brief intermission with yourself. "Unless you'll baby me more if I say no, in which case, no, I'm feeling absolutely wrecked." your dramatics made him laugh. You took the opportunity to place kisses all over the expanse of his face as he laughed wholeheartedly.
Once his giggles died down a more serious look took over his features. "I didn't just say all that shit in the heat of the moment by the way." Geto spoke, rubbing your cheeks, "About makin' you mine." He elaborated. "Good." You answered, leaning your head up to press your lips together again. "Wanna be my girlfriend?" He asked properly. You pushed him off of you, switching your positions as you crawled on top of him, his hands finding their way to your tits as he massaged them in his hands.
"Depends how well you fuck me during round two~" You tease, wiggling your hips down against his semi-hard cock, steadily growing under the heat of your cunt. "Sounds like you might be my wife in about ten minutes." He challenges, making you burst into a fit of giggles as he sat up and wrapped his arms around you in a bear hug, attacking your shoulders with kisses.
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chemical override
Ewan Mitchell x actress!reader
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a/n: i caved and did an actual Ewan fic! Given that the lad is more of a public persona nowadays, I reckon it's fine (?) This is pure self-indulgence for all my Ewan loves. May have a continuation but idk for now, enjoy!!
series masterlist ▪︎ main masterlist
The reader and Ewan are paired for press interviews. Despite barely having any scenes together and only knowing each other in passing on set, the chemistry they share cannot be denied...
Your first round of press takes place in a primped up hotel suite in Paris, thanks to the team at HBO.
You are an up and coming actress, much like some of your costars in the show, but the pressure is heavier on you because you were entering in season two, whereas everyone was already well-acquainted with one another.
Your few scenes were mostly with Jace and Baela, so you grew close to Harry and Bethany.
However, the media team decided to pair you up with Ewan for the day. A little fun initiative was set by the team that a character from the Blacks would be do press with a counterpart from the Greens - hence, yourself and Ewan.
You're nervous as you walk down the hallway, unable to fully pay attention to the instructions your lovely assistant gives you.
She tells you about the different interviewers for the day, bloggers and magazine writers from all over the world. She reminds you that each one will only be for a maximum of 5 minutes, so it shouldn't be too complicated. She smiles and eagerly says, "Take a deep breath, you got this!", as you reach the suite doors.
But in your mind, all you can recall is your first interaction with Ewan, almost a year ago right after the table read. You had nervously blurted out to him that Aemond is your favourite character, after he just asked, "How are you?". He laughed, said thank you, before he was pulled away in conversation by Tom.
You pray to the fictional Westerosi gods that things will fare better today. That you won't get all tongue-tied when those steel blue eyes land on you.
Upon entering the room, the team is quick to fuss over you. Sometimes you forget that you're actually an actress now. A celebrity, some might say. It all feels surreal and you have a inkling it won't ever stop being this way.
Ewan is already seated in front of the camera, and he stands to give you a hug as you finally walk over.
"Hey there, how are you?" he smiles widely, smelling like cigarettes and something muskier as he wraps his arms around you.
Unroll your tongue. Rework your brain. Calm down.
"Hey, Ewan!" you respond. "I'm doing great, happy to see you again."
"Well, I only wish we could have had more time together on set." Ever the gentleman, he gestures for you to take your seat before he does the same. "But next season perhaps? Who knows?"
"Oh, sure." You settle in, pleased by the fact that your chairs are only about a foot apart. "We can both look forward to my character giving Aemond the arse kicking he deserves."
He laughs, eyes glinting with mischief. "Come on now, I was thinking our characters are actually quite compatible, no?"
"Well, I sure wouldn't want to step on Alys' shoes. She'd probably curse my character all the way to Yi Ti."
"Hmm," he hums, biting his lip. You can't help but hear Aemond when he does that. "I say you can always count on Aemond and Vhagar to come to the rescue of a beautiful maiden such as yourself."
Well, you'll be damned. Ewan, while still an introvert of his own sort, is as charming as can be. If he's turning it on to get himself hyped for the press, it's working.
It's definitely working on you, to say the least.
The media manager gives the signal for the first interview to begin, and a reporter walks in, all ready with prepared script in hand.
"Here we go," you mutter, facing forward.
"Good luck," Ewan replies.
You both shake the reporter's hand, and he introduces himself as Jared.
"So guys," Jared begins. "Why don't we start with you telling me a little bit about what we can expect from your characters this season?"
The question is easy, and it doesn't take long for you and Ewan to think it through. Jared asks a few more basic questions, before drawing the attention more to you.
"When you watched season one, did you have a favourite character?" he asks you.
You smile, "Oh, I mean, I have to say - and Ewan already knows this, by the way - that Aemond was my favourite character."
"Was?" Ewan says, feigning shock. "Unacceptable."
"Was... Is... " you shrug, rolling your eyes playfully, earning a laugh from Jared. "I think I might be more a Daemon girl now."
"Oh!" Jared exclaims happily. "Does Matt know about this?"
"I'll be sure to tell him - "
Ewan interjects, shaking his head at you, "There's no need to tell him, because I'll convert her back to Team Aemond in no time, trust me."
"Daemon is awesome, though," you say to him, smiling.
"Sure." Ewan makes a face like that fact doesn't matter. Wasn't he the one who said that Daemon would be the character he would most like to play if not Aemond?
"And Caraxes is my favourite dragon." You share a look with Jared, hoping he would agree.
"Yes!" Jared says. "Caraxes is the best dragon in the show, in my opinion."
"Ah, you're both wrong," Ewan says. "My Vhagar is the oldest and baddest dragon in all of the land."
"My Vhagar, he says," you joke. "Seems like someone still hasn't shed Aemond for this press tour."
"And I never will, darling." His gaze is intense when he turns to you, and you clear your throat to fight the warmth rushing to your cheeks.
"Alright, they're giving me the wrap-up," Jared thankfully breaks the tension. "It was a pleasure talking to you guys, congratulations on the new season!"
One interview down, and your nerves have already considerably subsided. Ewan tapping your arm to start up a conversation once more surely helps in distracting you.
In the best damn way possible.
"How do you think we did? That wasn't too bad, was it?"
"I think we did quite well," you casually offer a high five, but your heart skips a beat when Ewan interlaces your suspended hands for just a moment.
"I'm glad they paired me with you," Ewan says, after releasing your hand. You hold on to the armrests to keep your fingers from twitching.
"I am, too," you admit. "I am a fan of you, after all, but I think you already know that."
He blushes, "Well, that's not a bad thing. I think you're a fantastic actress. I must have seen your first film a good ten times."
"You mean my first and only film," you add humbly. "But thank you."
"Only film for now," he affirms. "No doubt this is only the beginning for you, darling. With your talent and your charisma, I'm sure you have potential scripts piled up already."
"I could say the same for you! Have you seen what your fans say about you online? You're the internet's new boyfriend, Ewan Mitchell."
The media manager announces the next interview, but Ewan follows up with a response for you under his breath, "I have seen some things. But when I have a girlfriend, I'll make sure she won't have to share me at all."
Oh, so apparently he is single. But wait - why is he telling you this?
You don't get to mull over that thought. For the time being, the next interview starts and you make sure you do a good job at what you're paid to do - promoting the series.
Not daydreaming about getting with a costar, for heaven's sake. Stay professional.
▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎
You feel lightheaded after finishing the seventh - or had it been the eighth? - interview.
Your assistant delivers a coffee to you during the twenty-minute break. Ewan had stepped out to the balcony to have a smoke, leaving you alone with your thoughts.
He certainly is everything you expected him to be, and so much more. Insightful, cheeky, dedicated. An artist, through and through. He was in the business for all the right reasons, passion and respect for the craft.
If he had any flaws, you weren't privy to them yet. If there are any reasons for you not to be attracted to him, you didn't know what those were yet.
And with every flirtatious remark and pointed smile, you can't deny the hope blooming in you.
"Hey," he reappears, pulling you out of your musings. "I hope you don't mind that I smell of smoke."
No, you didn't, not when it's him.
"Don't worry about it," you reassure him. You tilt your head forward to take a sip of your coffee, but a lock of your hair falls in front of your face. Annoyed, you think to reach for it, but Ewan beats you to it, tucking it back in place.
"There you go, darling," he croons, gesturing for you to proceed in drinking.
"Th-thanks." His eyes don't leave yours as you take a slow sip.
"So," you say, desperate to break the silence, "which interview did you enjoy the most so far?"
"How can I possibly choose? I mean, I really liked the one with ComicSociety, the guy that said our characters have a lot of chemistry and should get together next season. He's right, I already told you!"
"Ohhh, sure, that will go down really well with the Blacks and Greens."
He smirks, "I don't see why not?"
"For one, Aemond is ensnared by Alys, and my character will never give up fighting for Rhaenyra. I just don't see it happening, Ewan."
"Right," he mutters thoughtfully, "there is still Alys in the picture."
"Still in the picture? With the amount of steamy scenes you two have lined up for season three, I'd say she will be Aemond's entire picture in and of herself."
"Hmm," he glances at you once, then looks down. Dare you think it, does he look disappointed?
"But hey," you add lightly, "maybe we can talk to Ryan and he can flip the entire script just for our characters."
"Yeah," his cheeky smile resurfaces, "maybe you can take Alys' place."
Take the place of Alys? Of Alys. Is he insinuating...
"Next round of interviews, guys!" The media manager announces to the room.
"Here we go again, darling," Ewan squeezes your hand once, before putting on his professional face once more.
▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎
By the end of it all, not even caffeine can perk you up. You were exhausted, you and Ewan having finished four full hours of press.
Your assistant comes to your aid, ready to direct you back to your own hotel room.
"This has been such a pleasure, Ewan, really." You stand, this time initiating the hug.
He squeezes you gently, humming in your ear. When you pull apart, he says, "I honestly wouldn't mind trudging through hours and hours of press with you."
That's sweet of him. You're too tired to mask the warmth that rises to your cheeks. "And I feel the same. Today couldn't have gone any better."
"Truly, and listen, maybe we could - "
"Ewan!" The manager approaches. "I'm so sorry to rush with this, but we need to film just a quick soundbite with you for Aemond. Just two to three questions for the Max Tiktok account?"
"Oh, okay - " Ewan is reluctant to turn away from you.
"Perfect! If you could just stand there by the windows please..." The manager already has him by the arm, directing where he has to go.
"We have to go," your assistant says. "Still have to prep for tomorrow."
"I'll see you soon, Ewan!" you call out to him. "Thanks again."
He gives a half-hearted wave, dejected as he watches you walk out of the room.
"That wasn't too bad," you share with your assistant as you enter the elevators. "Not bad at all, actually."
"Oh, you did so well," she compliments. "It definitely helps with the press that you and Mr. Mitchell have such insane natural chemistry."
▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎
In the calm of your hotel room, you get ready for bed.
Just when you're about to finish with your nightly routine, your phone rings from your bedside table. You're quick to rush over, thinking it could be your assistant or your manager, with an urgent update about work.
But no - it's an unknown number. A UK number, as it appears.
Confused, you click answer anyway, putting it to your ear with a tentative, "Hello, who is this?"
"Hi, darling."
"Ewan?"
"Yeah, uhm, I hope I didn't disturb you - "
"Not at all," your answer comes out in a rushed breath.
"I also hope you don't mind that I got my assistant to ask your assistant to give me your number? It's what I wanted to ask you before you left today."
"Oh." You feel fully awake now, by some miracle, butterflies finding home in your stomach. "I don't mind. I... I should have given you my number, anyway. I have most of the cast's, in case I need to get a hold of you guys."
"Hmm, right," he says from the other end. You hear him calmly breathing, the sound strangely comforting, and wonder if he can hear the same from you.
He says, "I just wanted to keep hearing your voice. Didn't get enough of it today," and your heart just about stops.
"Oh. Okay," is all you are able to respond with.
"What are you doing?"
"Just... just getting ready for bed." Phone pressed to your ear, you shuffle around the room, putting some things back in place.
He says nothing for a few seconds, but you still hear his breathing, and some shuffling in the background. It occurs to you that he might just be as nervous as you are now.
Maybe.
"Listen," he finally says, "do you want to hear my pitch to Ryan about why our characters should get together next season?"
A genuine laugh escapes you. He sure is persistent. Playful, sure, but you're definitely willing to play along.
"Let's hear it."
"First," he says, "you have to renounce Daemon as your favourite character - "
"Not a chance."
" - and swear your love for Aemond."
"Keep dreaming."
He laughs, and you can only picture the corners of his eyes crinkling.
"Aww darling," he teases, "don't you love me?"
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💌 part two - part three
The OGs will know that the final line is a nod to my first ever Aemond fic! 🖤
Did this slightly delay my series works? Yes, yes it did. Do I regret it? For Ewan frickin Mitchell, I would never ~
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