#then one with Cal and Andre by themselves

[culturalsillystine]

This ended up longer than I intended.

Here's a long rant about Zero Day, denial, and finding comfort in your sickness.

.

One of the things that's stuck with us since our first time watching Zero Day is when Cal says something about not being able to cure someone who has nothing wrong with them.

Some people get so deep into their illness that they start to tell themselves, "There is nothing wrong with me." It's self-soothing, in a way. You have nothing to fix if there's nothing wrong, right? And you get sucked further and further into it until it's all you know, so it becomes normal. There's truly nothing wrong with you, because it's your norm, and how could that be wrong?

And then you get worse and worse until something happens. It could be something bad, such as Cal and Andre's case. Something people would usually never consider. But when you're sick, you're sick, and things don't make sense, and it doesn't matter what people would or wouldn't consider. Because you would, and you're normal. There's nothing wrong with you.

That, or you get help. And Andre briefly mentions something, I think it may be before what Cal says? I'm not sure, correct me if I'm wrong. But he mentions something, says that even if they did get caught and got put in counseling or something, they'd get out, and they'd still do it.

And that leads you to wonder, is that true? Is that truly what would happen? Or are they feeling so untouchable and so powerful that they think NOTHING can stop them. Not even professional help.

And we'll never know. That's what I enjoy about Zero Day, there's so much we never know. We just have to trust these two boys who will present you with their truth, not the truth.

We see very little of Cal's family, and what we do see isn't bad. What we see of Andre's is.. conflicting. His family means well, but he's an 18 year old boy who likes guns and doesn't seem to get enough appreciation from his father. It writes itself, really.

We see none of Andre interacting with his peers, we only see Cal during the prom scenes. And the prom scenes are loud and irritating and awkward. He doesn't really try to be social, he takes the next possible chance to go to the only person he really bothers socializing with; Andre.

They're both very sick. Whether it's the same thing, something similar, or something entirely different, who's to say, but they find comfort in each other. They're both rotting away, and it's okay, because it's together. Whether or not it's based in love (platonic or romantic) or a hatred for the world so deep that your vision is blurred by your tears of rage, who knows. You never get to know.

Because the last thing those boys would want is to be vulnerable. Because that means something is wrong. But nothing can be wrong, because you're normal. There's nothing wrong with you.

I hope this makes sense and isn't incoherent.

[street-corner-felines]

Zero Day Director commentary - With actor Andre Keuck

[oh-really-alicia]

.

[operationandre]

Zero Day told through Mitski lyrics.

(LONG POST!!!! moments and scenes will not be in order)

Andre’s last moments.

“And I want a love that falls as fast as a body from the balcony, and I want to kiss like my heart is hitting the ground” - Townie

— Andre’s last words were asking Cal for permission, for instructions to die. He wanted to die at the exact same time, not a moment before or a moment after. His love for Cal overshadowed everything. His plans to run, the false passports, the foreign money—they were all useless in that moment. He wanted to coincide with cal, to be one with each other. Their blood would share the same floor, mixing together in a last show of their devotion.

The Burning of the Crosses

“You’re my best friend, now I’ve no one to tell how I lost my best friend” - The Frost

— The thought of someone burning their crosses would make Andre and Cal laugh. They would make fun of the perpetrators together, but now they lay under the ground or on a cold metal table in a lab somewhere. There is no one to talk to. There’s a darkness for both of the boys, but it’s different from what they’re used to. Unlike the darkness in Cal’s eyes that used to make Andre’s chest burn, Andre finds this blackness cold and he does not feel anything from it. Unlike the darkness in Andre’s words that would always excite Cal, Cal is bored.

The Reactions of Their Families

“So if you need to be mean, be mean to me” - I Don’t Smoke

— After the massacre, both Andre and Cal’s parents blame themselves, especially after the police question them and ask them how they didn’t notice anything awry. They wish that they had been a source of relief for their boys. In their eyes, Cal and Andre are still their babies, and they do not want to believe they did anything wrong. They want nothing blamed on their boys; they want everything on them.

Andre’s Last Conversation With His Dad

“Lately I’ve been crying like a small child, so please, hurry, leave me, I can’t breathe, please don’t say you love me.” - First Love / Late Spring

— Andre’s eyes have always been focused on Cal. He believed that no one would ever love him, at least not to the extent Cal did. The moment his dad says the words ‘I’m proud of you’ his world almost falls apart. Would his dad understand him? Would his dad be proud of him in his final moments?

Cal’s Diary With the Sitar

“Mom, am I still young? Can I dream for a few months more?” - Class of 2013

— Cal knew what the outcome of the crime would be. He was aware that he was not coming out, that he truly did not want to come out. He would’ve ended everything the same way no matter if the crime happened or not. He knows Zero Day is coming up soon, and he wants to keep that dream almost completely separate from the way his loved ones know him.

Andre’s Plans vs Cal’s Plans

“But, Big Spoon, you have so much to do, and I have nothing ahead of me” - Your Best American Girl

— Andre and Cal have very different views for both the future and the present. Andre works, has gotten into college, and is in multiple clubs and track. he wanted to run after Zero Day. He wanted to live. On the other hand, Cal had nothing, no job, no outlook for after Zero Day. He knew of Andre’s wants, but he also knew it was never a choice for him.

Final Moments

“I just need a quiet place where I can scream how I love you” - I Want You

— The ultimate show of devotion from the two boys is their deaths. They are surrounded by nothing but quiet, only slightly disturbed by police sirens and a 911 operator. There is nothing in their mind other than one another. Their lives flash behind their eyes and what they see are visions of each other.

Cal’s Hopes for His Family and Rachel

“Maybe when you tell your friends, you can tell them what you saw in me, and not the way I am” - Goodbye, My Danish Sweetheart

— While Cal doesn’t care what people think of him or what his legacy is, he wants to keep intact the minds and reputations of those he left behind. They shall not be disgraced simply because they trusted him. He even clears their names for the police in his final statement.

The Final Diary

“So why didn’t you stop me? Why didn’t you stop me and paint it over?” - Why Didn’t You Stop Me?

— Andre and Cal state multiple times that this had to happen, that they have to even the score of life. They blame others, almost explicitly saying there have been moments that should worry people, but they have been allowed to keep going and no one can stop them now.

“I Couldn’t Have Done This With Anyone Else.”

“One word from you and I would jump off of this ledge I’m on, baby, tell me ‘don’t’ so I can crawl back in” - First Love / Late Spring

— Cal is it for Andre; Andre is it for Cal. They exist in each others’ minds but not as parasites, simply as another train of thought. Anything the other says is gospel; every word the boys say sounds like it is coming from one mouth, one mind. They will do whatever the other person tells them to do.

Andre and Cal Finding One Another in Life

“Little boys cry and look around for comfort, and always get what they want” - Real Men

— The moment Cal and Andre meet, they know they have found their person. They will never judge one another, and they have shared experiences. They hate together, and they love together.

Cal Defending Andre to Rachel

“But with everybody watching us, our every move, we keep it secret, won’t let them have it” - Once More to See You

— Cal knows the truth behind the reason for recording, but he refuses to tell Rachel for multiple reasons. He doesn’t speak on anything until she mentions Andre. he quickly moves the blame to himself, saying he’s insecure and needs attention. He knows he and Andre are being observed and how others find them weird or off putting, but he refuses to play into it. Their true thoughts are reserved for one another. No one else is allowed in.

“We’ll be like God.” “No, we will be God.”

“You believe me like a god, I’ll destroy you like I am” - I’m Your Man

— The two boys view themselves as something greater than life, as something beyond religion and beyond belief. They take everything into their hands: their peer’s lives and the balance of the world.

The End.

[brendaareiss]

Freaky caldre hc!

(like always, don't read if u don't fw it)

I

v

- Cal tears up or cries easily while doing it, he's actually kind of sensitive

- Cal is OBSESSED with Andre's back and with his happy trail. Send post.

- Andre LOVES making Cal submit to him and talking to him/giving him orders while doing it

- One of Cal's biggest turn ons is being called a "good boy" or "pretty" when he's getting absolutely destroyed.

- Cal being hypersexual has led the two of them into not passing a day without doing something sexual. Whether is a quick bj the high-school's bathroom, a hj in Andre's room while his parents are at home, grinding and dry humping in Andre's car or Cal getting absolutely ruined

- I honestly don't think they switch at all. Andre loves being in control in all situations, when he's not, the man truly starts tweaking. He gets stressed, angry because he can't do shit, and it isn't a relieve to him when someone has control, power over him. Cal is totally fine by that though, he's happy with satisfying Andre

(Andre would rather kill himself than having something inside of him. Yall can't make me change my mind with all the "bottomdre" bullshit.)

- They're the clingiest and cutest mf when they're done. You can hear Cal's giggles and Andre yapping about how perfect Cal is and looks when you walk past Andre's room.

- Andre has DEFINITELY left bruises on Cal's body. He's too rough, he can't control himself.

- While Cal is teasing as fuck, he's just resumed to a submissive mess, a bunch of "more, please, andre" and a begging mess when Andre finally touches him

- Following, Andre loves making Cal beg. Not only because it fuels his ego, but because he loves hearing Cal's whiny voice, being completely overwhelmed

- There is not a single time in the life span of Andre kriegman where he hadn't finished inside of Cal. Cal sometimes gets annoyed or pissed of, because they needed to be quick and not make a mess, or because now he has to clean himself up. But most of the time he loves it too.

- Cal LOVES being manhandled. He will never admit it out loud though (well, only if Andre forces him to admit it, even repeat it)

-Cal also loves giving bj's to Andre. Having his mouth and throat full of him, the feeling of being fully possessed and weakened by him...Cal is obsessed with it

- Andre loves pulling Cal's hair.

-Cal has made Andre fuck him in the morning to not go to class. He was met with a delicious breakfast afterwards. Andre claimed it was his reward.

-following, Andre always gives little rewards to Cal once they're done. They can be food, small gifts or being bear hugged and showering him with kisses. He does almost anything to make Cal feel loved and cared for afterwards.

- Andre has internalised homofobia, Cal was sa'd as a kid. So yeah, things can get pretty angsty sometimes.

- Andre's dirty talk it's the bittersweetest thing ever. He would say the meanest things but with the most caring and loving tone of his voice (almost making fun of Cal). But when he's angry though, he's just mean (Cal secretly loves it but you won't hear him saying that).

-Cal has had Andre's belt on his wrists and neck

- Andre always cleans the mess the two of them do. Normally when Cal's taking a shower

- They REALLY can't keep it their hands to themselves.

- Andre is rlly toxic. Sorry. (Cal is too, but Andre wins by a lot). It's mainly because Cal is really the only one that he has and loves.

- once they're done, go back to sleep and finally let Mel inside of the room, she always sleeps in between them or on top of them (mostly Andre, ofc)

I'm seriously considering to start making fanfics. Leave asks so I can make fics about whatever you guys want 🙏

[sanguineaddictionn]

⭒ zero day hcs ⭒ :

(the fourth of july edition)

* everybody goes through 565336 boxes of rocket pops- cal’s siblings, cal and andre, chris, cal’s parents, andre’s parents, etc - they’re so good

* andre and cal beg chris to let them drink a little, which ends in them biting off more than they can chew- stumbling to one or the other’s room, giggling, trying to keep eachother somewhat quiet, eventually just having a ball which snowballs into them making out LMAO (canon event for me rn minus the last part)

* andre and chris fuckin’ love fireworks. do they almost burn themselves? absolutely, but the kriegman family does NOT go a single 4th without setting off good fireworks

* ok so i think cal = more of a hot dog kinda dude but andre = more of a burger or like bbq chicken kinda dude. just feels kinda canon to me??

* cal’s obviously invited to do something fun with rachel, but either him (or even him and his family) head up to the kriegman family summer home and spend it there instead. i feel like it probably started off as a thing when the boys were in middle school and then it became a tradition

* drunk andre = very rambunctious and wants to just like do something crazy like strip and run naked up and down the street (out of character for him) ; drunk cal = super giggly and just really happy to be around whoever he’s with, joining in on whatever they’re doing - the two make for a very interesting night that they probably won’t remember

* cal’s siblings fw the sparklers and color bombs SO hard - they buy multiple packs and just use ‘em all up by the end of the night

* chris kriegman fourth of july party.. lots of liquor.. lots of girls.. lots of weed.. lots of fun … just putting it out there!!

ok that wasn’t a lot but i love the 4th and just wanted to do something zero day related!! happy 4th to all us americans who celebrate

[andre-and-cal]

Caldre Headcanons

#3 || Random

Thought I’d share em here. :)

Calvin Gabriel

Cal used to be able to pass as a 12-year-old at theme parks and restaurants until he was around 14-years-old. This was because he used to be a pretty short kid until he reached high school, where he went on to experience a growth spurt; it helped him reach an average height and he nearly stands at Andre’s height if it isn’t for the 2 inch height difference.

Calvin has a sharp tongue and can get pretty “mouthy”, but at the same time, Andre will get just as mouthy back.

Terrible video game rage. He gets easily infuriated by glitchy games and rages at them with Andre, which leads to them both ranting on about how video games are “no good” for people their age and how they’re made by “spiteful individuals” to make people go insane. And yet after about 15 minutes of lying in bed, cuddling, and cooling down, they go right back to the game.

Cal tried to ask Andre about his brother, but Andre didn’t really wanna talk about it. When they first became friends, Calvin thought Chris was Andre’s brother, but got embarrassed when they corrected him. Fortunately, they all laughed it off after. Though, Calvin can’t help but gaze at Andre whenever he plays with his siblings or watches them with him, just always thinking to himself how much he loves him.

Andre Kriegman

Used to be one of the tallest in his class until he reached middle school. After that, he started growing steadily into an average height. But he’s still slightly shorter than some of the other athlete guys at his school.

Andre knows damn well how mouthy Cal is, and it really drives him up a wall sometimes. Sometimes he’ll just simply ignore him or retort back— but only if he’s playfully annoying him or not being serious. Other times he’ll snap at him, to which Cal doesn’t really care.

Breaks his PS2 controllers so often when he rages at video games that his dad went on to learn how to repair controllers, and started fixing them for him.

Doesn’t really talk to his older brother anymore. He doesn’t like to talk about it, but the reason for this is because him and his brother never got along, even when they were kids. They never developed a proper sibling connection, which is partly why he babysits Cal’s little brother and sister a lot, because he sees them as the siblings he never had. Andre always tries to play with Cal’s little brother because he wants to act like a second big brother, or quite frankly the big brother he himself never had.

Caldre

They both easily influence each other, in many positive and negative aspects.

They both got detention one time for talking and goofing off too much in class. That only happened once though; all the other times they kept their chatter low key and quiet.

Andre and Cal occasionally hang out at the car junkyard in town, where Calvin brings his stash of weed and smokes blunts with Andre. Not enough to get completely baked, but enough to really enjoy themselves. But stoned Andre and Cal are both the funniest dudes and also the horniest fuckos. Andre doesn’t handle weed as well as Cal does— as in, Andre’s laughing his ass off at something he probably shouldn’t be, or unknowingly touching Cal in some shape or form, like his shirt sleeve or his arm. But their upped moods usually lead to some form of erotic acts between the Army of Two.

They secretly write notes to each other in class. They sit near each other in the periods they have together ‘cause they’re, as described by their teachers, inseparable. Nobody thinks anything of it, but Andre and Cal both are fully aware of this fact.

Andre and Cal get into heated arguments when they do argue, which usually occurs sporadically, but they both feel guilt in their own way after, especially Andre, with their poor mental health and intensely unresolved rage. Whenever Andre gets really pissed, he says a lot of things he doesn’t mean; Calvin hides the fact that it makes him feel bad about himself at times. In arguments, though, Calvin gets just as loud and angry if pushed to that point, but he’s also far too witty for his own good. They both get in each other’s faces and may push and shove, but don’t lay a hand on each other. At least, they’ve never gone ballistic during arguments to the point where they wanted to hit each other or do something of that sort.

Calvin feels a sort of melancholic happiness when him and Andre’s families get together for cookouts or events, because even though the moment is calm, he knows that him and Andre’s names will be in the obituaries soon. Andre doesn’t know, of course, that they won’t be alive after Zero Day, since he’s so set on the getaway car plan. Even though it was unrealistic, it at least didn’t hurt to plan. His brief fear of death in their final moments is prominent, but the knowledge that he isn’t dying alone— in fact, he’s dying with his favorite person; his person… somewhat comforted him, and he knew he was ready to “fade out”.

[redeliminator]

"A child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth"

(i remember seeing this quote here on tumblr in the context of zero day and it hit me so hard I've never forgotten it)

we don’t know the level of bullying Andre and/or Cal endured at school. we only got hints that they were bullied, but we never witnessed anything first-hand (excluding the hilarious fight after the poetry evening because let's face it, they started this shit lol).

how often were they insulted? did it ever get physical? were they beat up? were they deliberately isolated by their peers?

in the police report, we learn that “neither Kriegman nor Gabriel was singled out for teasing” and that they were generally liked. yeah I think I've heard that one before so let me rant before I fucking combust

many people, including even some investigators and psychologists, still refuse to acknowledge the toxic environment that Columbine was and the way it fueled Eric and Dylan’s mental conditions. bullying at Columbine was so common that it had long lost its shock value. being shoved into lockers and having shit thrown at you was just a part of many people’s average school day, and the faculty turned a blind eye to it in favor of the bullies because they carried the school’s reputation with their achievements, making them basically untouchable.

the alienation and the humiliation landed Eric and Dylan at a point where they couldn’t see past their suffering and frustration. they didn’t know how to cope with it other than (self-)destruction and no one managed to stop them. Columbine was a perfect storm, with many factors randomly playing out in Eric and Dylan’s favor and worsening their conditions at the same time.

bullying was not the sole reason they carried out the massacre, but denying its impact will not lead you anywhere near the truth. 

Eric and Dylan both had friends and acquaintances. they spent time together and made memories just like all the other teenagers. the fact that they were on friendly terms with a number of people doesn’t rule out bullying from other groups and I can't stress that enough.

I can’t help but think that there might be a similar reasoning lying underneath the statement in the Zero Day police report. it’s easier to say that the kids never showed any signs, that they were not bullied, that they were mentally sick and beyond helping. it removes many (adult) people’s responsibility to look out for the signs, to intervene when it’s necessary, to recognize and address the silent cries for help. after all, if someone was a high-functioning psychopath who mastered the art of manipulation and hiding behind a mask, then was anyone really capable of helping them?

at some point, the built-up anger will start to pour out. there’ll be no way to keep it in anymore, no more room to store it. if no one has ever taught the kid how to deal with it, their self-hatred may start to turn outwards. they will no longer only hate themselves for not being able to fit in, for not managing to fulfill the social expectations of an average likable teenager. they will also hate the world for not letting them in. they will hate people who somehow found their place while they couldn’t. these people might have had nothing to do with the kid’s misery, many of them won’t even know the kid’s name, but that doesn’t matter. all these people will slowly morph into one big enemy unit. fellow students will be no individuals - they will be merely part of a larger hostile entity. when you hurt one of them, you hurt the big enemy - and that’s the objective.

[boys-with-gunss]

𝐙𝐄𝐑𝐎 𝐃𝐀𝐘

It's kind of weird, like, talking to my friends. I talk about Zero Day and they get all weird about it. I hear them talk about true crime all day the same why I do, but it's not weird then. Like, it's a fucking movie, it's a movie. It's not like I'm talking about anything bad, they didn't actually kill people, it's a MOVIE.

Online school is severely isolating, I have nothing to do anymore. I watch movies and I guess I blog now too. ZD is a movie I like, it's not boring like everything else.

I guess the reason I like it so much is because Cal and Andre are so nice, likeable, Cal especially. He was sweet to everyone and then when the shooting actually happened, he was psychotic. Andre throughout the movie seemed to be taking a stronger approach twords the whole thing but his hesitation at the end to commit suicide showed what kind of person he was. Cal always talked about how similar he and Andre were but they honestly really weren't. Cal was sweet and softspoken infront of others, his front was so good, but he was psychotic and obviously the more manic and unstable. HE was the one shouting and teasing the victims, taunting them and only shooting when they tried to run or he got too bored of it. Andre revenge driven, angry, obviously mentally ill, but not in the same way as Cal. We saw in the beginning, he's been bullied before and most of the characters his age either have no idea who he is or just dont like him. In the shooting he shot at everyone quickly, no hesitation to kill and it was really the anger and adrenaline he got from it that played into that fact, but once that adrenaline was over and Cal and him were going to kill themselves, he hesitated and kept trying to stall it. He was ready to kill others, but not himself, which shows how much more "normal" of a person he is, and how much of a pussy. He has a survival instinct Cal doesnt have. We saw it even before the shooting, he was always reckless. For example him convincing Andre to drive with his eyes closed and shit. I think Cal really went through with it because he was planning on killing himself anyways, and he wanted the fun.

My friends get freaked out. The amount of times friends told me to "get help" because of a fucking movie I liked. It's actually fucking retarded.

Not Vic, obviously. That's why we're friends, why we even made this blog. We say it's pointless but honestly, me and Frankie, we're so different but we think the same things. But we're not stupid, we spend too much time together in an echo chamber, just enabling each other, that's not good. Making this blog was so we could talk about stuff not just to each other. People on the internet just decide not to be pussies when they're behind a screen, which is good because if we say stupid shit, someone's gonna call us out.

Anyways, that got off topic. I'm tired, I miss V, I hate school.

-Ronnie

[angelsureno]

one thing i love/hate about zero day is how emotionally inept cal and andre are because as a derivative work of the basement tapes you cant really predict the way they were formated and even less in the time they were recorded but one thing i think kind of lacks is monologues from the two boys. sure cal talks a bit at the camera all alone but thats the thing though

calandre have unresolved issues with each other and themselves, which you can figure out through their nonverbal actions and the little interactive social cues between them and family/friends, as much as i wouldve liked seeing an andre monologue he wouldnt do it, he's that disconnected with his own feelings and his feelings towards this thing that they're doing that even when he's breathless about to die with his best friend, his way of speaking is choppy and limited, and cal is like yeah man cool.

also that thing about cal killing a cat and being arrested before zero day its so smart it recontextualizes the whole thing

[fahrni]

Saturday Morning Coffee

Good morning from Charlottesville, Virginia! ☕️

Feeling under the weather today. I started getting sick in the middle of the week. I slept a lot yesterday and hope to have a quiet weekend.

I hope you enjoy the links.

Paul Lefebvre

Just a few days ago, BASIC turned 60! On May 1, 1964 BASIC was created by Dartmouth College professors John G. Kemeny and Thomas E. Kurtz.

I really love BASIC. It was the first programming language I learned and used professionally. It was all MS-DOS based at the time and the language had changed over time to include functions and custom data types. It was a really great language.

I owe my career to Microsoft BASIC Professional Development System. ❤️

Joseph Heck

Designing a Swift library with data-race safety

Swift concurrency changes are going to be a lot of fun and take some effort to restructure existing code to make use of it.

And by fun I mean a lot hair pulling, teeth gnashing and head banging on the desk.

Jeremy Mathai • /Film

Marvel couldn’t have made a better choice if it had the Time Stone itself. Back when a “Doctor Strange” movie was far from a guaranteed hit, Scott Derrickson and Kevin Feige knew they simply couldn’t afford to get the casting wrong.

Can you imagine anyone other than Benedict Cumberbatch playing Dr. Strange? I can’t.

And to think Joaquin Phoenix was on their radar sounds strange to me. To be clear Joaquin Phoenix is an amazing actor and can play anything but after seeing Benedict Cumberbatch playing him I can’t imagine anyone else doing it.

Anton Zaides

I always knew that distractions in the workplace are harmful, but only after reading Deep Work by Cal Newport, did I understand how severe the problem is!

This is why I prefer an office to open office spaces. I don’t know how anyone thrives in an open space. Add multiple meetings a day to the mix and you’re not getting much done.

Since the pandemic I’ve been working from home and it’s wonderful. I can control my entire workspace. 🖥️

K. Denise Rucker Krepp • CNN

In some military circles and among many who consider themselves aficionados of Confederate history. The Ruckers have a history of military service going back generations. They’ve also had deep roots in America’s shameful Confederate past. That includes my distant cousin, Col. Edmund Rucker.

It’s really nice to see the Confedercy being dismantled. Now, if we could get rid of the white supremacists and bigots that would be amazing. One step at a time, I suppose.

Collin Woodard • Jalopnik

Tesla laid off at least 10 percent of its workforce earlier this month, and in typical Tesla fashion, the Texas-based automaker made sure the layoffs were done in an organized fashion with plenty of communication and a clearly defined strategy. Just kidding. The layoffs were so poorly executed that security was forced to scan employees’ badges at the door to figure out who had been laid off. And, apparently, that included a guy who had taken to sleeping in his car and showering at the factory so he could work longer hours.

Musk is such a nice, standup, fella, isn’t he? 🤬

Nothing sticks to this guy. I guess that’s what happens when you’re a narcissistic sociopath.

Richard Speed • The Register

Google’s latest round of layoffs have hit engineers working on its Flutter and Python teams.

And… more layoffs. Tech has had a rough couple years.

Howard Oakley

In my quest to implement a full app written for SwiftUI on macOS, my next tasks concern the app’s Settings, how to set those as User Defaults, how to implement some of their more common controls, and how to customise the About window. In these, SwiftUI starts to come into its own, in comparison with AppKit, although it does have a couple of surprising shortcomings.

I love it when folks share their code and experience! I’m not brave enough to do that! Thanks for the code! 👨🏽‍💻

David Merritt Johns • The Atlantic

Back in 2018, a Harvard doctoral student named Andres Ardisson Korat was presenting his research on the relationship between dairy foods and chronic disease to his thesis committee. One of his studies had led him to an unusual conclusion: Among diabetics, eating half a cup of ice cream a day was associated with a lower risk of heart problems.

This is weird to read. Ice Cream for diabetics? I mean, anything for ice cream. Amirite? 🍦

Chance Miller, Ben Lovejoy, and Filipe Espósito • 9to5Mac

A little over a year ago, General Motors made what may well turn out to be one of its biggest gambles in many years: dropping support for CarPlay for all future EVs.

The author thinks this was a mistake. I don’t.

I’m hoping this will turn out well for GM. Just don’t serve up a bunch of ads for new features and other products.

Brian Ramian • Los Angeles Times

Opinion: I once lived in my car and can’t fathom criminalizing homelessness

When I worked at LEVEL Studios in 2010 I had trouble finding a place I could stay fairly cheaply after my sub-lease ran out. I lived in my car for a week. It wasn’t horrible, but its wasn’t ideal.

[orthodoxcrusader729]

Antaritius Conflict, 2016-19. The Ukrainian and Estonian garrison, 30km away from the Azeri, Assyrian and French garrison. Romanian and Bosnian garrison and outpost are stationed in the Novo Afghanipt region. Serbian 2nd Division and French Foreign Legion patrolling in road 628, when Pro-Knet Korean and Japanese rebels ambushed during a night patrol, leaving 7 dead, 3 wounded from the Serb-FFL side, while knetz lost 55 men. The next day, the Ukrainian-Estonian Garrison was attacked by Pro-Knetz and Mnet espionage agents. When reinforcements trying to reach the garrison, the Romanians were attacked by Mnet shock troopers, Bosnians were busy defending the Garrison where it is experiencing attacks from the Southern part of the base. The confrontation lasted for 3 weeks, and after the Antaritius Forces took out the invading Knet-Mnet forces. The day after that week, 3rd Bulgarian Corps and Afrikaner Defense Corps encountered 3 Mnet battalions and 1 Knet Guerrilla formations near the Bamania border. Where it lasted 4 months, until it became a full-scale war. 3 Far-right Ultranationalist and fascist groups was formed to help fight against the Knet-Mnet forces. Volunteers from Sweden, Norway, Bulgaria, Croatia, Mongolia, Libya, Italy and Palestine came to fight for the Antaritius authorities. Many European descendants from South America and Africa who has ultranationalist and fascist beliefs joined the Paramilitaries. The war ended in Antaritius Forces victory. Knetz and Mnet forces were expelled from the region.

The Far-right Confederation are the ones commanded by General and Field Marshal Andre Rapaelovic Bonzon, and the most loyal Far-right paramilitary groups that are part of the 7 Loyalist groups. 2 of them are the Grill and the Black Ocean Group. Uniforms used by the Confederates are assorted mostly Rain camo, BDU, ERDL, Tiger, Lizard, Mlok, Dubok, Brushstroke, MARPAT desert, Cadpat, Latpat, VZ Pust, VZ 85, DPM, 3rd PNP camopat, Oakleaf, Plane tree, and the Egyptian Rock Camo. They all use M1 helmets, & PASGTs and are armed with AK-47s, AKMs, MG43s, M250 cals, Fals, Vectors and Galils. They still exist up to this day, they formed their political party called the Confederate National Party alongside the Confederacy of Tropentarctica’s main party, Greater Confederacy Party. They are part of the 7 Far-right alongside the Ultranationalist groups who fought with the Coalition against the Turks, Knetz and also fought in Jang Dien Phu Island. Mostly notable for fighting bravely in New Dien bien Phu and the Western Front.

Maugeria Territorial Forces is an auxiliary that are restoring peace and order in Maugeria, the Pro-knet Korean, Chinese and Filipino population rebelled against the Ukrainian Self defense Force and the Constabulary, Maugeria is under South Tropentarctican administration. The White and Levantine Minority started arm themselves by joining the ST Constabulary and Territorial defense force, 신조선 Sinjoseon Army started to attack the ST forces, pushing them back to the Southern part of Maugeria which forms the majority of the minority. Maugeria is 3 Km away from Jang Dien Phu, the Pro-Knet Korean-Vietnamese held territory from the Southwest that was soon captured by the French government-in-exile in Casmania and the East Casmanian Foreign legion. Azeris and small numbers of Slavs started defending their homes and farms from Sinjoseon Koreans, others flee their homes. Central region became a trench warfare, South Maugeria is now where the ST forces and allied Militias are currently residing and garrisoned. The flag flown by the Knetz are the flag of the Former Joseon dynasty and the Korean Empire. The war is still ongoing up to this day. Southern Maugeria’s ST force. The battle of Algierople which led to the ST’s defeat politically, but militarily successful. South Tropentarcticans, Azeris, Slavs and Levantines formed a Militia, and are now fighting in the central region or named by the locals as Maugeria’s trench land. Due to it’s trench wars. The war ended in 2026, which partitioned Maugeria, Maugeria moving to the South, Algierople becoming under the control of Maugeria, and central region became a buffer zone for the 2 factions.

Sierra Lucia War

The ongoing conflict started in 2017, which began when 2 Ultranationalist groups, Azerbaijani Loyalists and a Turkish expeditionary Corps declared war on each other. Azeri Christians were forced to side with the Ultranationalist due to being feared of execution and muslim Azeris were either volunteers due to the promise that they will be sent home if they join the Ultranationalist. In June, 2017, Eastern Casmania and North Tropentarctica or Northern Republic sent troops to aid the Ultranationalist, and fight against the Turks and Turkmen volunteers. The last day of the Turkics were at October 23, 2017. Turkic Christians remained, and even joined the Northern Republic’s ranks and the Sierra Lucia Frontier Force. While muslim ones and POWs were sent back to their respectable nations.

[operationandre]

cal comes home from prom. well, he comes to andre’s house. it’s closer to a home than the building that he genuinely lives in.

he’s standing in andre’s room, having returned from telling everyone in the limo that he’s staying with andre. rachel’s face, flat and disappointed, flashes through his mind. he understands. she wanted this to be the night for him, for him to come out of his shell and realize how fun everyone really is, but he’s returned to andre. just like he always will.

andre walks up to cal and grabs at his bow tie. startled from his thoughts, cal is now very aware of what’s going on, of andre’s hands so close to his throat. he wonders if andre can feel his heartbeat and how it runs faster with every step andre takes.

“your tie is all fucked up.” andre let’s out a small laugh. “fun night, huh? any girls throw themselves at you? couldn’t resist your pretty face?”

cal’s breath hitches in his throat. andre just called him pretty. it isn’t the first time he’s said it, but every time it still catches cal off guard. his eyes travel from andre’s hands to his face to his shoulders, bare and wet from the shower he had gotten out of moments before cal’s arrival. his gaze stops when he gets to andre’s hips where his boxers rest.

“not really, no. not what i’m looking for.”

andre scoffs, stepping away from cal to look in his closet for a shirt. cal walks over to andre’s bed, slips out of his jacket, and unbuttons his shirt. as he flops down onto the soft mattress, there’s only one thought in his mind: andre.

[detectiverickitubbs]

Character Dislikes Guide

Muse name: Raquel “Ricki” Tubbs

Least Favorite Nickname:  Tubby/ Tubbies. She absolutely despises it. 

Least Favorite Color:  Putrid green, hot pink, muted grey 

Least Favorite Season: Winter

Least Favorite - Hot or Cold: Cold. frigid temperatures. When it is hot you can cool down. But when it is cold, you’ve got to layer up and layers are constrictive. 

Least Favorite Holiday: Halloween.

Least Favorite Food: Meats.

Least Favorite Flavor: Intensely acidic ones

Least Favorite Drink: Cranberry juice 

Least Favorite Scent: The stench of death & charred human flesh & vomit 

Least Favorite Sound: Unexpected gunfire & car explosions & the static sound of a radio gone dead & when one’s wire starts blasting the top ten radio hits in the middle of an investigation 

Least Favorite TV show: Bewitched & the news when it involves Vice related activities

Least Favorite Area of School: detention & calculous  

Least Favorite Aspect of their Jobs: being unable to save everyone & the pay. 

Least Favorite in Others:  cruelty & arrogance

Least Favorite Place: -_- prisons & Cartagena & Drug houses

Least Favorite Thing to Talk About:  her mistakes 

Least Favorite thing about Themselves:  the vigilante impulse & and the way she intensely feels anger

Least Favorite Daily Chore: laundry

Least Favorite Type of Clothing:  hammer pants/ parachute pants with the camel crotch. Why were those EVER a trend?

Least Favorite Superpower: Telepathy 

Least Favorite Thing About Being In Love: it makes fools of rational people & it means giving a part of yourself away & the potential for being hurt

Least Favorite Thing About Death:  It is so final

Tagged by: @backedagainstthewall​

Tagging: @moretreasurewithin​ (any and all your muses) @nolabred​ @celibacy-for-celluloid​ @iwillmakemystandhere​ @maj-john-andre​ @muddledmenagerie​ (for Cal & any others) @alreadybrcken​ @hauntedxwings​ (Axel & Johnny)  @squadleads​ @brxve-hexrt​ @bravoxsniper​ @dearestdoctor​ @lightcreators​ @notloaded​ @firstrespcnse​ (Athena, Hen, and anyone else) @protectxthem​ @fallsekings​ @pilothearted​ @amyriadofmuses​ (For any of your muses) @abouttiime​ and anyone else who wants to do this @knife-for-hire​ @stupiidgood​ @firstherofirstlove​ & @mothersofdisneymagic​ (For any of your muses) @thedoctornumber11​

[zerodayimagine]

cal n reader r having steamy sweaty sex andre walks in and jins without a invitation. r & c don like it very much

Bodies sticking together, you and Cal were having what seemed like the best night of your lives. Your fingers knitted themselves in his blond locks while his squeaky gasps for air sounded in your ear. Somewhat like a mouse, only human. You both were so into it, you getting to the point in the situation where you could finish—but a figure standing by the door threw you off. “What the f—?” you began, only to be shushed by an unknowing Calvin. Maybe it was your imagination. You squeezed your eyes shut and the figure vanished. “Cal, I’m—” you sounded once more before deeper voice interrupted. It was Andre, standing at the foot of the bed wearing nothing but a bath towel. “I’m ready for some bonding time,” was the only thing you heard before seeing Andre move onto the bed and start caressing your hair and Cal’s hair one at a time all while he rubbing his nipple seductively.

[livinginlandmarketing]

Marcial Reyes, a charge nurse in the emergency department at Kaiser Permanente Medical Center in Fontana, suddenly found himself the patient.

He felt fatigued at work and later at home, waking up one March day with a dry cough and a temperature of 107. Reyes drove himself back to the hospital — and later discovered he had the coronavirus.

“I knew in my heart that it was COVID-19 — I was looking at what was happening in Italy, South Korea, Spain and China, and it was like, am I one of them? I couldn’t believe it,” said Reyes, 46. “I bid my wife goodbye on FaceTime and it broke my heart. I couldn’t even say goodbye to my son.”

Reyes spent 23 days in the hospital, isolated and on a ventilator for more than a week. His worst fears also came true: he had unknowingly passed the virus to his wife, Rowena, and then-4-year-old son, Marc.

As a large percentage of the essential health-care workforce in California, many Filipino nurses like Reyes have found themselves on the front lines of a deadly pandemic, risking their lives and their families’ health for the job they love. Despite the dangers, they report daily to the high-risk hospital areas in which they are likely to work.

Filipino nurses make up nearly 20% of California’s nursing workforce — the highest percentage of any state, according to a California Board of Registered Nursing survey.

Filipinos and Filipino Americans comprise about 12% of all health-care workers in California and 11% of health-care support jobs, including caregivers and nursing home aides.

“There is not a single hospital you can go to without a Filipino nurse,” said Reyes, who has multiple nurses in his family. “We take pride in our profession and our culture. We work hard, we are welcoming and we are resilient.”

Reyes and his family recovered from the virus, and he was back at his Fontana home in time for his son’s fifth birthday. After being in quarantine, maintaining a healthy diet and regular exercise, Reyes tested negative. He went back to work in May, a month after being discharged.

“For me, nursing is not just a profession; it’s a vocation … it felt good to come back (to work) knowing that I am fighting COVID with the same people who helped me fight COVID,” he said. “My faith, family and love for my profession are the important things that kept me going.”

Filipino immigrants account for 28% of the 512,000 immigrants who work as registered nurses nationwide, according to 2018 data from the American Community Survey and the Migration Policy Institute.

The exact number of Filipino nurses who have contracted the coronavirus is difficult to track. But Filipino nurses have died from the virus at vastly higher rates than other ethnic groups, reports National Nurses United, the largest nurses’ union. Though Filipinos comprise just 4% — about 150,000 — of all registered nurses in the U.S., Filipino nurses make up nearly a third — over 30% — of all reported nurse deaths from COVID-19.

And in California, Filipino nurses account for 11 of the 16 COVID-19 deaths — nearly 70% — in the nursing profession, according to the California Nurses Association. The California Department of Public Health does not collect data on Asian American subgroups, but Asian Americans make up almost 6% of coronavirus cases and 11.7% of deaths, as of Sunday, Oct. 25, compared to their 15% of the population.

In the Inland Empire, two Filipino nurses have died of complications from COVID-19, as of Thursday, Oct. 29, according to Kanlungan, a nonprofit-led global database tracking Filipino healthcare workers, including nurses, who have died of the virus. Locally, Kanlugan reports, they are Crisalyn Viste, a registered nurse at Kaiser Permanente Ontario Medical Center, and Sally Fontanilla, a nurse at St. Mary Medical Center in Apple Valley, who died in early October, two weeks shy of her 52nd birthday.

Some health-care workers and unions cite a lack of protective equipment as a factor in the high rate of Filipino American cases and deaths during the pandemic — including the death of Celia Marcos. The Filipina telemetry charge nurse at Hollywood Presbyterian Medical Center in Los Angeles County died of COVID-19 complications after treating a patient without proper protective gear, the SEIU Local 121RN union alleges. The union, which represents thousands of nurses in Southern California, said Marcos’s death highlights the importance of adequate protective equipment for health workers.

Research also shows that preexisting health conditions often found in older Filipinos — such as diabetes, hypertension and thyroid issues — also put them at risk. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports that adults of any age with certain underlying conditions are more susceptible to severe illness from the virus.

But these risk factors don’t stop Filipinos from braving the storm.

From left, registered nurses Rochelle Chua, Joshua Garcia and Nelia Andres are seem outside the emergency room of the VA Loma Linda Hospital on Monday, Oct. 26, 2020. (Photo by Drew A. Kelley, Contributing Photographer)

The large number of Filipino healthcare workers in the U.S. can be attributed to the many nursing institutions established in the Philippines in the early 20th century and modeled after American nursing schools.

“At different points when the U.S. has had a labor shortage in health care, the Philippines was a key source to recruit nurses,”  said Anthony Ocampo, an associate professor of sociology at Cal Poly Pomona University, citing research from Filipina historian Catherine Ceniza Choy.  “There were excellent training facilities, plus they were English speaking, and so Philippine-trained nurses were an ideal group to fill the gaps in the medical field. From the Philippines side, many Filipinos who aspired to migrate abroad saw nursing as their golden ticket for a better life, not just for them, but for their entire family.”

Ocampo, who has written about Filipino immigration, colonization, gender and sexuality, says that Filipino health-care workers are great caregivers and “equipped to have empathy” toward diverse patients because, being from the Philippines, they are exposed to different cultural norms and perspectives.

Related links

California’s Filipino American nurses are dying from COVID-19 at alarming rates

These 8 Southern California doctors, nurses sacrifice to help hospitals fight coronavirus

7 key moments in the Inland Empire since coronavirus hit 6 months ago

Suit alleges Riverside Community Hospital failed to protect workers from coronavirus

Coronavirus: Healthcare workers hold candlelight memorial for Hollywood Presbyterian nurse

The bravery and tragedy of nursing during COVID-19 pandemic

Filipino American History Month , which is in October, is a good time to highlight the contributions Filipinos have had “in all arenas of American life” — from labor rights and social movements, to the fields of education, art and healthcare, Ocampo said. The month celebrates the first recorded presence of Filipinos in the continental U.S. in Morro Bay.

“Filipinos are helping to sustain the American healthcare system,” Ocampo said. “Some leave their loved ones behind in hopes of creating a better life for them, and so to hear that they are dying in droves just breaks my heart.”

Many Filipino nurses say they won’t let the coronavirus stop them from caring for patients.

Arlene Abarca, a nurse who lives in Corona, works with COVID-19 patients in the intensive-care unit at VA Loma Linda Healthcare System.

After attending Cal State San Bernardino, Abarca, 37, worked in the hopital’s ICU for nearly 14 years. When the pandemic hit, Abarca found herself putting on an N-95 mask and protective equipment for her 12-hour night shifts, where she assists those on ventilators and in isolation.

Registered nurse Arlene Abarca is seen Monday, Oct. 26, 2020, outside the emergency room of the VA Loma Linda Hospital. (Photo by Drew A. Kelley, Contributing Photographer)

“Nursing is overall wanting to take care of other others, and this is how,” Abarca said. “I don’t see myself doing anything else … helping people at their most vulnerable.”

Abarca loves working with other Filipino nurses in her unit, whom she calls her “work family.” They watch out for one another, teach her more about the profession, and connect her with her Philippine roots by sharing recipes, language and culture.

“I’ve been blessed,” she said. “So now I feel like my blessing is to help others.”

Fiona Kelliher of the Bay Area News Group contributed to this report.

-on October 29, 2020 at 12:07PM by Allyson Escobar