#Americans im so sorry. Survive.

[slightly-gay-pogohammer]

okay what the fuck am I supposed to say.

[wrong-answers-only-polls]

wait, American football is all of America right guys!?!

pst, down here! I know there arent any capybaras in Chile its intentional ok?! dont go thinking I dont know my capybara facts! also im sorry if you dont see your country I cant put an “other” option, lest people try to chose a right anwser

[gwensy]

if i had a nickel for everytime an american girl doll had an asian best friend character who had an arc where they turned into an antagonist of some kind id have like 5 which is ?

[mothergold]

i really want to answer asks and talk about my favs but there’s such a big hole in my chest right now i’m sorry

[sometimescherwrites]

i am so sorry but if jpm said ANYTHING in the process of killing me my ass would immediately be making fun of him like what are you gonna do?? kill me??

[goldensparrows]

every so often i gotta remember that 330 in the fucking morning is Not the time to get angry and defensive about what online strangers are saying

[sharpth1ng]

Ive already posted this in my server, so you may see it twice, but In case you don't see it there im posting it here too.

Im assuming most of you have seen the news about the us election. Honestly im feeling nothing less than devastated, and i would assume Americans are feeling ten times worse. Im so fucking sorry to you all, and I know that doesn't help at all. I feel angry, hopeless, and sad as fuck, and i dont know how to comfort anyone or advocate for the hope i think we deserve.

What I can do is remind you all who you come from.

Women, queer people, disabled people, indigenous people, black people, new immigrants- anyone who experiences marginalization- we have been through this before. Many times. So many lives have been unjustly lost and our rights have been trampled on over and over, and we shouldnt have to be dealing with any of that still in 2024. It feels insane that im even having to write this post right now.

But even with that crushing history, repeating itself over and over, we haven't been silenced. If anything we've gotten louder. We've been having mainstream conversations about oppression and liberation in the past few years that were completely undiscussed when I was a kid. The vocal support for trans people alone, even with the rise of transphobia, is unprecedented.

None of this is meant to tell you that it's alright, or that it's not that bad, because it is that bad. But what I'm telling you is that its been this bad before, only this time we're louder than we ever have been before and we'll be louder still next time. There are more of us than there ever have been before, and if they couldn't take us all out when there were fewer of us they wont manage it this time.

There were drag shows happening in gay bars when it was still illegal to be gay at all. There were Natives preserving language and knowledge out of residential schools, and black people inventing whole new types of art and resistance while they were still being actively enslaved, and those are just a few examples. The point is that we dont stop, we never have. We will keep making art, finding love, and joy, being fucking loud and fighting for each other.

It's ok to hurt, to be angry and scared. Let yourself feel all of those things because its the only rational response to this.

But don't let it shut you down. Your history is one of resilience, survival, and compassion. We're so much more than the oppression we face and we always have been.

Reach out to the people you love and tell them you fucking love them. Make plans to see them. Gather with your community and organize to support each other, find ways to protect each other, and above all else don't stop looking for joy. Don't stop making art. Don't stop showing compassion.

Solidarity is the most important thing we have right now, so don't give up on it.

I don't know how to close this message really, but i want to repeat I'm not telling you to have hope, I'm not telling you it's not so bad. What I am telling you is that you're stronger than you think. You come from strength, you come from people who faced odd that seemed insurmountable so that you could be here today.

If they couldn't take us out before they wont succeed now. We're only going to get louder, angrier and stronger. And when the tide swings back in the other direction, like it always has in the past, they better be fucking grateful that most of us will be fighting for equality instead of revenge.

[joe-spookyy]

asks you about american werewolf in london

hoooly shit it’s finally happened. someone asked me The question. thanks anon.

i am now going to try and sell you all on this movie cause i can’t recommend it enough and i think everyone should watch it. so: let me tell you a thing or two about hit 1981 horror comedy an american werewolf in london!!! and this is off the top of my head so if any of it is slightly off numbers wise im sorry. if you like 80s horror, men, queercoding, re-animator, the thing, jaws, saw, the lost boys, or just werewolves in general. hear me out on this one. link included to watch.

The Premise:

fresh off the heels of his cocaine fueled jazz musical masterpiece The Blues Brothers (1980), director john landis decided he was going to cook up the greatest film ever made. and he did. he was actually gonna have john belushi (jake blues) and dan akyroyd (elwood blues and yes the ghostbuster) play the two main characters, david kessler and jack goodman. now, who are these fellas? well i’m so glad you asked. david (played by david naughton) and jack (played by griffin dunne) are two dear pals from new york on a cute little backpacking trip across europe. david's the tall one. he's silly and gleeful to be out and about. jack is the short one. he's very much not gleeful about the fact that they're on the rainy moors and wishes they were in rome. together they find their way to a cute little pub and go inside, looking for hot drinks. the locals do not love this. they also do not love when jack asks them why there's a five pointed star on the wall (since lon chaney and universal studios assert that that's the mark of the wolfman!) it gets awkward. so they leave, with nothing but the warning to stay off the moors, stick to the roads, and beware of the moon. obviously, they do not follow this. wouldn't make for a very interesting movie if they did. and, as i'm sure you've assumed, they encounter a werewolf, leaving jack like this (dead):

and david, who survived the attack, with the curse of the werewolf. but fear not! david is transported to a hospital where he makes a lovely recovery, and jack um. well he stays dead. but he comes back to haunt david! he shows up a few more times in further states of decay to tell david that he really ought to just kill himself so that the curse is broken, jack and all the other werewolf victims can rest in peace, and david won't accidentally maul any additional civilians as a werewolf. hey while we're talking about jack heres me when i dressed up as him at a horror con. and the man himself.

anyways. hijinks ensue, and you're taken on a delightful romp across 97 minutes of fun as david tries to navigate life as... you guessed it. AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON!

why it rules:

in my opinion, that's enough to make this movie flames as fuck. but if you're not convinced yet? let me tell you some more. first off. the practical effects on this bad boy are straight up excellent. they're done by my personal favorite vfx artist rick baker (who also worked on star wars, men in black, videodrome, king kong and more!), and he does not hold back. the picture of jack shows how nasty and detailed the wound is pretty well, but in action it's even better with all the nasty fleshy bits dangling and wiggling and eugh. it's gross. but it's so well done. and he does a terrific job showing how jack decays throughout the rest of the movie. but of course, what really matters is the werewolf. it's not called an american dead guy in london. which is good. cause that would be a dumb name for a movie. anyways. if we’re going to talk about the werewolf, we have to start with the iconic transformation scene. sped up.

wow! pretty impressive stuff right? it’s all practical, no cgi, and i think the way it’s almost drawn out and the relative silence of the scene adds to the impact it has, since it sort of forces the audience to sit with and feel just a little bit of the discomfort that david seems to be feeling. we just have to watch him scream in pain and beg for mercy. yeesh. now, the transformation scene is hard to top. but i think the final werewolf design is actually pretty solid. it’s distinctly not man, but it’s also distinctly not wolf. i would include a picture, but i feel like part of the allure of the film is how it (jaws style) doesn’t really let you get a good look at the monster itself until the end of the movie. it’s a great way to build the tension and leave a little bit up to the audience’s interpretation. and the audience will always imagine something way more horrible than you could have ever created. which is kind of beautiful. the first time i watched, i found myself kind of disappointed in the werewolf’s appearance - its face seemed to be stuck in a sort of permanent scowl. i was kind of lost, because i couldn’t imagine why a static face had won out over whatever the vfx team was clearly capable of making. but Oh. dear reader. when nurse alex price, david’s dear love, who cared for him in the hospital, allowed him to live with her, and even banged him, approaches the wolf. when she tells david she loves him. the wolf’s eyes soften. it begins to drop the snarl. see. i lied here’s part of the wolf. all snarly like and scary. before it melts at three simple words from alex. god.

it hits me like a huge truck every single time. rick baker never misses and this movie was certainly not an exception. he got an academy award for it and it was well deserved.

not so into the technical stuff? that’s okay. i have more to praise about this movie. it is one of the best blends of horror and comedy that i’ve ever encountered. although some of it looks a little dated, i do think it maintains its fear factor. it’s plenty gory, and in my humble opinion, the subway scene (you’ll know it when you see it) is one of the most effective bits of horror i’ve ever encountered. even when isolated from the film, it still packs a punch. but i’m not gonna put it here because i want you to just watch it with the rest of the movie. sorry. and on top of the horror, it’s honestly hilarious. if you don’t think seven dead people ganging up on one dude and listing ways he should kill himself in the middle of a porn theater while a porno plays very loudly in the background. well. i don’t know what to tell you. you probably won’t like this movie that much. also, the final needle drop over the credits at the end is so abrupt and so funny. love it.

and of course, being an 80s horror movie with two male leads. i’m sure you can guess what i’m going to say. it is not hard to read jack and david as friends, but it’s also not very difficult to read them as having a little something going on. like love. fellas is it gay to go on a little trip across england with just yoh and your best bro? hard to say. textually, i do think it’s kind of telling that every time jack shows up, it’s either right after or while david is having a heterosexual experience (flirting with alex, banging alex, watching straight porn in the porn theater.) it’s almost like… something other than jack… is haunting david. i dunno. i’m not a cop. but it’s interesting. seems like something the average tumblr user might like to keep an eye on, so i’m letting you know. also they have a conversation while david is completely naked which is like. hello. plus the inherent queerness of the werewolf narrative is something i could talk about for HOURS and was especially prevalent, alongside vampire movies. in the 80s during the aids crisis. my short essay on this ⬇️

also, there’s a classic john landis third act car crash scene, where, in the same vein as the blues brothers, an obscene amount of cars are absolutely demolished.

also also, the muppets make a brief appearance in this movie. this made me jump for joy, because i love the muppets. and you should too.

fun and true facts

still not sold? well, check out this last ditch effort in the form of fun facts. or, if you just want to know more, read on.

micheal jackson was so impressed by the effects in this movie, particularly the transformation scene, that after seeing it, he promptly hired rock baker (vfx guy) and john landis (director guy) to work on the music video for his hit song thriller. you’ve probably seen it, but if not, go watch it. tbh, even if you have seen it before, go watch it again.

david naughton was a doctor pepper spokesman before the filming of this movie. he was in at least a few bits of promotional material, including at least one commercial. unfortunately he lost the job because of the amount of time he spent dick out in this movie. doctor pepper did not want that to be the representation of their brand. cowards, the lot of them.

speaking of his dick, you actually never fully see it at any point in the movie despite the fact that it seems they never felt like telling david to wear pants on set. there is a reason for this! david (character) is jewish and canonically circumcised (dunno how else to put it) and david (actor) is neither of these things. so, to avoid ruining the realism in his. werewolf movie. john landis took great care to never show the whole thing.

the american ambassador who visits david in the hospital is played by frank oz, who also voices miss piggy. because of her brief cameo, he technically plays two different roles in this movie, although miss piggy is simply credited as “Herself” in the end credits of the movie. he also voices yoda which isn’t relevant but it is really funny to me.

see you next wednesday, which is the name of the porno in the movie, is actually a fun john landis easter egg! many of his movies include the phrase “see you next wednesday.” it’s also seen on posters in the subway scene.

in the scene where jack first visits david in the hospital, he was supposed to take a bite of david’s toast, after which it would immediately fall out of his ruined and torn to shreds throat. however, it was cut for being too gross. which is sad i feel like it could have been funny.

when david calls home to talk to his parents, he mentions two siblings: rachel and max. these are the names of the directors children in real life.

griffin dunne, who plays jack, also appears as the family therapist in a season 2 episode of succession. this was a jumpscare.

while they were filming the naked in the zoo scenes, they were unable to actually close the zoo, so when filming carried on past the opening time of the park, they just kept going and allowed butt naked david naughton to run loose around the zoo. they did, however, succeed in closing piccadilly circus for the car crash scene.

in the beginning when jack is being attacked by the werewolf, it was in fact half a wolf prop on the front of a wheelbarrow. this is a very funny vision for me.

jack is right - the five pointed star is considered the mark of the wolfman, according to 1941’s The Wolf Man, played by lon chaney junior and produced by universal pictures. the guy knows his stuff. interestingly, rick baker did the makeup for the 2010 remake of the wolf man as well. he did pretty good, i think.

this isn’t even about this movie but blues brothers is an awesome film too and a fun fact about that one is there was a whole part of the budget devoted to buying cocaine. and you can tell. great movie.

director john landis did in fact kill three people the year after this movie came out. so. i do feel a little bad promoting it because jesus christ. but. no harm no foul in pirating it. it’s one easy internet archive search away. and sometimes it’s on tubi. but just in case, here’s the internet archive link. https://archive.org/details/an-american-werewolf-in-london

so. anyways. please check out this baller ass movie and talk to me about it. thank you so much to whoever asked this. i love you. thanks for reading. bye.

[galacticleague]

speaking my truth on npmd because im thinking about this alot. i think the reason it falls flatter than tgwdlm and bf as a musical is that tgwdlm and bf have a running theme — want.

(whole thing undercut)

the cast of tgwdlm want human connection - charlotte wants sam to love her, bill wants alice to love him, mr davidson wants his wife to choke him while he jerks off etc etc, and eventually paul goes from 'i want what anyone wants, money, kids, a partner maybe idk' to - to put it simply - wanting emma (putting it very simply, if i went into detail this post would go off the rails). this switch is what makes him vulnerable to the hive and this want to live and to survive and to be happy with emma is satiated by pokey by giving him the connection he craves via hivemind, this is how it works for everyone. they want to be happy, pokey makes them happy by removing any need to want anything in the first place.

similarly, in bf, the adults of hatchetfield are still miserable and they want to be happy, they have this void within them that they feel they need to fill with products and consumerism. if they buy this stupid fucking doll their kids will love them, they will be happy, etc etc. and this want to be happy is similarly satiated by wiggly via the cult - they have something to worship, or - in lindas case - people who worship them. they have purpose, or at least they think they do, but whether their problems have actually been solved or not - they are still content.

but in npmd, this is less solid. theres that bit where they have to sacrifice what they want the most, but this is near the end. its kind of all over the place, and this wobbliness(?) is sort of just emphasised by the fact that there is no specific lord in black, its all of them. now i loved the summoning when i first watched it because im obviously a huge hatchetfield fan so i like. know who these characters are but as ive seen others say, alot of npmd does rely on knowing hatchetfield lore - understanding injokes. and in hindsight it just... isnt great for the cohesion of the plot.

tgwdlm and bf both have specific themes, specific lords in black, they have subplots but they have a solid throughline that is easier to follow. to me, npmd feels like its all over the place and it just feels kind of...mid for lack of a better word.

i think there were some moments that were just kind jarring? i guess? like if i loved you coming directly after ruths death was really strange, tonally. i wish they spent more time on ruths death tbh she deserved better. richie got two songs and an opening scene. anyways i digress- i feel like whenever i think about it im always like. i just wanted More. which is weird cuz its already like 2 hours long but idk. IDK!!! if i loved definitely felt unnecessary to me- like just conflict out of nowhere. i would have liked more build up to it. maybe im just salty that it took up stagetime that could have been used to grieve ruth but. sorry for the random if i loved you slander i think my point here is that some moments and some subplots felt more tropey, injokey or like fanservice??but not in a sexual way?? - is that the right word to use idk - than actual compelling plot moments. tgwdlm is an incredible work of theatre and uses subversions of tropes to communicate a great story, bf is a detailed criticism of american consumerism and how capitalistic societies force people to rely on products to make their lives better, npmd is. high school drama with ghosts. it just doesnt hit as hard on its own.

i dont want to be one of those "im a better writer, and THIS is how i would have done it!!!! im going to fix this!!!" people so im not going to do that but i think something i would have liked to see was focus on just one lord in black, probably nibbly because i feel like he fits the most and has the least preexisting story. i mean for gods sake, why does wiggly have the most speech time out of all the lords in black again!!! he already has an entire musical about him!!! greedy bitch- well i guess thats kind of his thing. i think i just want to see more of nibbly tbh, he has one nmt story and he only shows up at the very end. anyways that was kind of a side rant sorry gang. there isnt a problem with having a story featuring all the lords in black, but i think it just doesnt quite work in npmd for like structural reasons as well as plot cohesion.

i did enjoy npmd, im not pretending i didnt, but narratively it is the weakest hatchetfield musical and i just wanted to put my finger on what it is specifically. please dont take this as like hate or slander, i am a huge starkid fan, but i think it is important to consume media critically.

also i am not a professional i am a teenage drama and english lit student who likes media analysis and narrative design so just. take everything i say with a grain of salt :)

if you read all this, thankyou and if you disagree please lmk what you think(civilly.i do not want discourse in my notes)!! i could be hugely wrong about this and just need to think more about npmd and id love to see others' analyses!

[wooziorgans]

hi. as a queer person, especially a trans man, the results of the american election are genuinely terrifying.

i do not really talk about my political beliefs on this account, but in my personal life i am incredibly involved in local politics within my country and i have been keeping up with the election because its so close (geographically) to me.

there are genuinely no words to describe the despair and the pain i feel for all of my american friends.

the increase in anti trans legislation in canada has been rough enough as is, but to know that my trans siblings won’t have access to life saving medication and treatment for the next four years, that queer people will not have the right to marry, that women will not have access to abortion under any circumstances, to know that immigrants will have to relocate and people of colour will be segregated and hate crimed… its a lot.

to all of my american followers, friends and mutuals, i am so sorry. there is nothing i can say to comfort you other than that i am so sorry. im sorry that your rights were determined by an outdated voting system. i am so sorry that democracy failed you because of pure misogyny and racism.

these factors, these things that people are born into, identities that cannot change to fit the mold of a fascists ideals… people are going to die.

initially, my first thought was that “people survived him for four years last time, they can do it again” but then i removed the veil and thought about it for more than a second, put myself in that situation and realized it’s so much worse than i ever imagined it could be.

millions of people died last time he was in office. millions of people did not survive him. and millions of people will not survive him this time.

i am already living walking on eggshells in canada. anti trans legislation is at an all time high in the provinces, with only two provinces being low risk, and one province planning to ban legal name and sex changes altogether. but to be living that for the next four years?

to have to resort to unsafe versions of gender affirming care. to live in fear of your own body, of biological functions. to perform unsafe abortions because your access to safe birth control has been completely abolished… i cannot imagine the fear and the anger that all of you are feeling right now.

this is a very dark time. and if you voted third party or for the republicans, i hope you’re ashamed of yourself for putting people’s lives at risk. for voting for a convicted felon and rapist. for voting for a racist and misogynist.

i do not want anyone who voted or endorsed the republicans on my account. you are not welcome here.

“it’s not that deep” it IS that deep. people are dying.

[louissatturi]

My oppinions on the quarentena character's

"Dr" Benito Camelo: he is one of the character's that surprised me the most and also did't surprised me AT ALL (weird i know) i thought he would be more of a joke character since its name is literally a joke name (literally a Paula Tejano) but seeing quackity's rp from the first minutes the character got predictible (in a wonderful and good way) to me, FINNALY an asshole that would not save a child or actually help his team, he got my heart pretty quickly since he was a asshole like my bisexual queen Elizabeth Webber, he is also a character witch i want to see his fake asshole mascarede to break, the very very small moments of his "goodness" are so interesting, even when he only saved emi to test on her and was being an ass to this poor orphan child, he did't wanted her to see the dead (defenily becoming a creature) body of her father, exited on where this character is going for now one, will he get character growth and actually help his team and being a father figure to emi?(comparing him a little bit to liz in here sorry) or will he still being a sellfish bastard? I hope if he survives he comes back to the universe, interesting character and had alot to give for the story and universe of ordem paranormal

Luis Miguel Kennedy: omg the moment roier oppened his mouth to roplay luis i feel in love with him, luis is type of character in ordem that i unfortunaly always fall in love with "Combatente class character that has a hero complex that is funny" (lírio and joui jouki my obssesions) and i adore him, i loved the parody batman voice actor that roier did to him, i liked that he was basicly the only one in the group if more "hero" like morality and im obbessed with his ridiculous name that implies some american heritegy but something that got my attention is his hatred for people that he dosent wiew as "good" or "worth" of saving, the way he acts with benito says a lot about the character, they way would defenily kill benito if emi asked is TERREFYING, he would kill for other but basicly only how he finds worth and its a fun shake up of this trope and he is so Bisexual i LOVED HIM

Jeffrey Bacon: i really enjoyed him as a character, and found him really funny even if the jokes did't landed with me most of the time, he is quirky in a straight men way is very interesting, he is just a regular guy defenily not prepered to be dealing with the ordem paranormal bullshit that he is seeing, i found foolish rp for Jeffrey wonderful but Jeffrey as a character did't impressed me tbh, i really want to see how foolish will do to Jeffrey when it's time to take Jeffrey seriously and in more dramatic moments where jokes aren't really fit for the situation since foolish clearely is going to a more comic-relif rp, im scared for this poor soul since cellbit will traumatize this character the most

Lucie Pocharde: i really enjoyed her, more from how baghera played rather then lucie by herself, she is pretty much what i expected her to be but with a bonus of her being actually annoying!, idk how baghera endured the session being so late for her but she did amazing (horrible dice aside) hopefully now that baghera know more what to do with her rp regarding lucie we will see lucie's more as her own character, she is pretty interesting but her alone as a character did't grew that much on me but i loved to see baghera playing, waiting for next saturday to know more about her so I can have a better jugment

Diego Thalles: he is really sweet, really fofo and gay, thats all, since pac was very clearly nervous with the whole situation pac kinda "hided" his rp talents that could me good for Diego, its a easy character that we dont know much about so i enjoyed his pressence but for me if he dies the only loss is that we wont have pac in a ordem table tbh, he is the character im the most neutral about, waiting next week so we know more of him and hopefully pac lets his rp talent shine

Emília (emi): cellbit showing once more that he does not know who to do preteens especially preteen girls with emi lol, at fist i did't cared much of her since she has such obvious death flags but she grew on me FAST, such a annoying brat love her, especially her interactions with lucie and benito those moments ware iconic, waiting to see what cellbit does to her, honestly i want her to be the sole survival of this group, if a tpk heppens, i hope more people on the group besides luis interact with her more so we understand her personality betted

Mikael: Really fucking hot omg does ordem artists do not know how to NOT make peopls hot???? This character surprised me because i thought he was a ordo realitas agent 100% but nah he is actually a "villan" lol im exited in witch vibe cellbit is leaning with him, exited to see him dying horrible since he is a antagonist and a hottie

Thats all!

[rainyamidala]

Hi, could you write an angsty Jake Sully x Na’vi!wife Reader?? Maybe set in Avatar 2 and she gets injured after saving her kids from Quaritch in the forest and Jake freaks out? Thank you so much lovely x

authors note; this is rough. BOLD AND SMALS MEANS PAST. LOOKING BACK AT SOMETHING THATS ALREADY HAPPENED!!!!!

I am not american, my mother tongue is NOT english!!

she/her used. will continue to be used unless requested otherwise.

theme; jake's wife died in the second battle against Quaritch - he can't seem to move on or forget about her.

warning; mentions of death, loss of a parent and lover, grief

note to requester; im sure this isn't what you had in mind, but I hope you enjoy regardless! sorry for the wait!!!!

"I can't just forget about her - you don't understand." Jake said to Tonowari, who sat down next to him.

Tonowari and jake had grown extremely close after everything that had happened, becoming the stereotypical father-duo you'd see on eath. of course, jake would never say this. Anyone on pandora – especially recently – hated the sky people. But after what had happened to Jake's wife, they had grown even closer. Tonowari had no idea what he was dealing with, true.. but he wanted jake to know he had a friend.

No matter how much Jake pushed him away, he always came back to help. Even though Jake doesn't say thank you a lot, he was very thankful.

"I'm not saying you have to let her memory go, Jake. I am saying that you have to let her spirit rest with Eywa. She's protected."

"Oh, what the hell does it matter if Eywa is protecting her when I couldn't protect her while she was still alive." Jake said, almost interrupting the leaders sentence. He knew Tonowari had nothing but good intentions, but Jake felt so guilty. guilty about bringing his family here, especially his wife (knowing she hated the place) – guilty about his children being left without a mother..

"It couldn't have been prevented. She died protecting her family and my people. For that she will never be forgotten." Tono said, placing a hand on jake's shoulder. He gave him a sympathetic look, even though jake was looking down to the water he had his feet in.

"Jake.. " She struggled to say his name, reaching to touch his face. Jake had grabbed her hand and placed it on his cheek as he bent down so she wouldn't have to struggle so much – his hand still on top of hers as a tear swam down his cheek. "oh, ma jake. don't cry." even though she was struggling to speak full sentences, she smiled a soft smile as tears ran down her very own cheeks. the open wound in her stomach sent occasional (but more regular by the second) shots of pain through her body, making her body, making her jaw clench or her breathing pause as it happened, depending on whether or not she spoke. she was quivering because of the cold - she was bleeding out. there was no chance she could survive this. not here.

Jake, still holding his wives hand to his cheek, leaned down even more. he kissed her on the forehead, before resting his own on hers with his eyes closed. it hurt too much to look at her. she was trying to be strong for him, even though she was the one dying. it really explains so easily who she is and how she treats the ones she cares for.

Jake shut his eyes and tilted his head a little, thinking about what had happened. It hurt him. It had hurt him gravely, and it forever would. "I just.." Jake said, his voice breaking and it caused him to pause. "I couldn't. There was nothing I could.. " Jake stopped himself again, feeling a recently familiar lump in his throat growing. "I know. I know." Tonowari said with a nod, knowing Jake was about to say it wasn't anything he could do. he was about to explain himself for the hundredth time - but he didn't have to. no one blamed him for what had happened.

"Jake.. " She said, whimpering. she was shaking uncontrollably because of the cold that was due to the blood loss. her body was shutting down and she knew she was about to die. although a scary feeling — she felt at ease knowing eywa would take care of and protect her.

"I know, I know, I know, I know, I know." Jake said, pulling away to look at her as he let her hand be freed from his hand and cheek. "I'm going to be okay." she whispered.

Jake looked up at the sky, trying to stop himself from crying. she deserved better than having the last thing she saw be Jake crying. "Ma jake, I need you to listen to me." She pressed through her teeth, trying to speak as calmly as she could despite the pain. Jake looked back down from the sky and at his beautiful, beautiful wife. she took his hand, squeezing it as hard as she could and offered him a warm, kind, soft, and familiar smile before she spoke again. "I am going to be okay. This is not your fault." she pressed her lips together, before pushing out the last thing she could. "Oel ngati kameie." she whispered, before slowly fading away. Jake realised quickly, his eyes widening as tears streamed down his face. he used his arms to lift her to his lap, her chest and up now laying on him as he used his arm to support her head. After looking at her for a couple of seconds, repeatedly screaming the words "no, no, no, no," over and over again, he pressed his body to hers, hugging her.

"no, no, no, this can't be happening." he said as he pulled away from her body and looked at her. he used his hand to remove some pieces of hair from her face, only to realise she was so, so incredibly cold.

"tìng mikyun ayoer rutxe, ma mawma sa'nok. srung si poeru ma eywa. rutxe, zamunge oeyä yawne ne'im"

*hear us please, all mother. eywa, help her. please, send my beloved back. *

"rutxe, eyng, ma eywa"

* please, respond eywa. *

he cried to eywa, begging. but it did not work. and now he was bound to an eternity of praying for his wife back, even if he knew it would never work.

[insanescriptist]

Im so scared because of this election and what it means for my loved ones and I.

If you're a global nonnie,

I'm sorry; you believed in the intelligence and humanity of the average American voter and were denied both.

Obviously Trump being elected is going to embolden the worst politics; either to use or abuse or both, the world and it's peoples. Not just in the current warring areas, but all over the world.

And remember, Trump is currently 78; he could easily die of natural causes within the next four years. Without Trump's star power, a lot of that momentum will die fast.

If you're in the US nonnie,

If you live in a Blue state, your state's likely to stay Blue, with all that being a Blue state entails

If you live in a Red state, your state is likely to stay Red, with all that being a Red state entails

If you live in a Purple state, it's likely going to swing one way or another and I wish you the best in surviving the politics and the political ads

Further US specifics under the cut

Like I'll be real and say I'm disappointed my state's not more purple, which is the best color anyway (side effect of living in the South; it's very Red Republican politics) but it is what it is; we just gotta live with it or deal with it so... most posts I've seen going around have focused on the importance of letting yourself grieve, choosing an issue to focus on and avoiding burnout. I think I'll focus on awareness somewhat. Just things to watch out for. Because there's going to be all sorts of obnoxious crowing and cawing about everything. I'll touch on things and if I had the time and energy, I'd link to various stories and sites but most of what I'll say here is easy enough to verify in broad strokes with a couple of internet searches.

If you're worried about the economy... yeah that's a valid worry and probably not the way you're thinking. You're thinking another trade war (Mexico would love it if there is btw, they benefited off of the last one and the Farmers who had soy in their fields as part of that rotation lost so much money) which would be ow for the US again, but mostly survivable as trade wars only focus either a trade good or trade partnership. The lesser issue but more concerning, Trump will slash anything he wants (regulations mostly) to ensure an economic boon because that's what people want and will notice by year 2 and 3 of his second term. What they'll celebrate. That and cheap gas. What they won't notice for a couple years is the further loosening of food regs (see all the recent food recalls and outbreaks) and what people won't notice for decades is the infrastructure issues (building regs for housing and ofc infrastructure in general.) There's also the various other safety regs and requirements built into the laws, no matter how shitty it is ie workman's comp. Regs are built in blood but business don't care if their money is bloody. But yeah, these reg slashes are going to crop up with after effects for absolute decades afterwards. Don't believe me? You should watch more housing renovation programs; there's various types of plumbing and electrical regulations that can absolutely date your house. And yes, the housing insurance companies can spot them and also not tell you about them, but certainly charge you for the increased risk. That's just for the housing regs btw. Industrials regs concern entire industries, like how much carbon your car can emit to be considered eco-friendly to what sort of pipes can be laid out where. No one wants to be the next Flint, Michigan but it could easily happen and probably with something else. There's buildings made less than 50 years ago that are made with materials considered unsafe by standards now. There's also banking shit to consider with businesses and housing. The oodles of various office and retail space unused which um. The banks care a lot about unused office space that can't even be refit into human housing. Empty retail space can eventually be filled with another business. Empty offices less so now that more businesses are less tied to the office as a place. (Reduces other business' overhead.) Banks hate having empty unprofitable buildings in their portfolio, but at least the interest rates are back to "normal" percentages. Like I won't get into the the money generation/shuffle game that's going on with the US debt, other than 2.4% is sustainable for political purposes and not humanitarian purposes, because boy would it be nice to slash the national debt. Really make the dollar worth something that way. Sure, I'll take getting paid more, but I'd sure like to be able to also buy more with my pay. Because foodstuff is still going high because of various supply issues due to climate issues, the newest banana plague, in addition to many, many recalls. Like does no one remember the arson going around various meat farms several years ago? The various poultry farms ended because of avian flu? Long story short, the food prices are still so high because supply is pretty fucked up. Stores have been jumping through so many hoops to get supplied, that the logistics people are probably Olympic level rhythm dancers by now. Which is an additional complication to the whole ongoing recall issues whenever there's a bad batch of anything. They're a bit too busy ensuring supply to always have all the documentation in order. Which obviously, recalls work best when stores know which products to pull. More economic news though, Trump is going to be so good for businesses. And so bad for the people.

If you're worried about your medical health, that's also a valid worry. Especially with his comments on various known vaccines. Like the standard ones we've had for ages. Might wanna get those touched up. Medical red tape is annoying to wade through at the best of times but he's not in office yet, so plan accordingly. Make the most use of your health benefits this year and next year (they're already set for the year), since the year after will be once he's in office and things will obviously shift to some degree with whatever health insurance you've got, if any. A little medical debt in prevention is more than worth the expense of cure later. Get the cavities seen to. Get that pap smear. Refresh your vaccinations. Do your tests, get your bloodwork ran and go through it bit by bit. Take your damn vitamins. (And your meds.) Because again, those regulations? Those are going to get more loosey-goosey. In some things. More tight on some things than others. It's going to vary by state politics. Like my state for example does allow for birth control but not for abortion. Would I like abortion to be an option, yes, because my state is terrible about supporting families after the birth of a child beyond WIC and SNAP benefits. Daycare waiting lists can be over a year and maternity/paternity leave is something of a joke depending on what/who you work for. About the only solid boon I can think of would be Trump's loosening of the health regs, that might entice some nurses back to nursing, easing that lack of human resources in the health care system. As a red state, there were so so so many nurses I've talked to that quit/retired rather than take a booster shot for Covid or even the original Covid shot. Which is a whole different story, but not for here.

If you're worried about your public safety because you're part of a vulnerable/minority population? Yeah, be concerned. Trump's political leanings and what he says emboldens all kinds of impulses in the worst people. So they might actually go through with impulses they wouldn't otherwise act on. The KKK might try to recruit again. Which I wish was a joke, but they actually did try to have a public, local to Izzy, meet during Trump's previous term; they got scared off by the locals. So general advice Look at travel recommendations/warnings when going through parts of the US. Plan trips carefully. Consider moving to friendlier places if able, take precautions if unable or unwilling. Keep to a buddy system. Stay with friends in public. Make your plans for if the worst happens so you don't anxiety spiral. Know who to crash with in an emergency How to get copies of your important documents if they're all ash or being held by another party etc. I know no one really does this nowadays but know your emergency contact's phone number!!! Still very important information. Your phone can be dead, lost, stolen or confiscated and along with all the data on it and with it. (Those phone cases with the wallet attachment? How delightful, a lost phone that has a wallet attached, especially one with a photo ID of any kind is a golden goose for anyone looking to do a little identity theft. Because in order to call to put cancels/holds on all your cards, you've gotta have a phone.) Also as a reminder, your biggest and best shield is your confidence; the moment you act like prey, you'll be treated as such by those looking for targets. Do your murder strut and your main problem will be people asking you for directions and grannies trying to get you to go to church.

[februaryflowers]

the way to a choi san’s heart is through his maruchan ramen

san randomly strolls into the dorm kitchen one day and also strolls into your heart at the same time

warnings: loud noise, hot take san is a cs major... (sorry...im not that sorry though...im standing by this decision), yeosang is an implied engineering physics major (i am, however, sorry to yeosang for that one...)

straight up fluff, 2987 words, san x reader | college au (has a lot of american college experience elements like dorm building living n stuff), a little love at first sight vibes??

a/n: im sorry but if i have to be stuck in stem then im gonna force uni au ateez to be too 💔 also fish tofu mention bc fish tofu is my love and part of this fic was inspired by real events to some extent LOL 

Watching pedestrians shiver in their coats outside through the window makes you wince. It’s a good thing you didn’t go outside tonight. You don’t think you would’ve survived all that wind in the freezing temperatures.

But alas, you still need something to eat for dinner, so it’s a night of instant ramen for you. Standing in the toasty dorm kitchen boiling noodles is plenty good enough for you, though, as long as it means that you don’t have to go out today.

Turning back to the stove, you place the brick in the pot, submerging it fully with a fork before you turn on a timer. With everything set, you return to the glass, watching the world go by below you.

However your peaceful reverie doesn’t last long, a crash coming that makes you jump and grimace. 

“Sorry!” sounds through the air, and when you finally open your eyes, the voice’s owner is squatting on the ground, picking up his own pot and a small bag.

As he rises to his full height, he finally finds the courage and meets your eyes, his cheeks growing a pink similar to that of some of the bustling students down on the street.

“Oh, sorry!” he exclaims again. “Were you making something? I can come back later.”

“It’s okay,” you smile, stepping to the side to give him room at the counter. “You can use that burner; I’ll be done soon anyway.”

With a quiet nod, he goes to the sink before placing his cookware on the stove. “I didn’t mean to startle you, sorry.”

“It’s alright,” you chuckle. “Accidents happen…”

“San,” he finishes. “I’m San.” 

“Y/n. I actually live in the room right next to here.”

“Oh?” he asks before his eyes land on your own cooking experiment. “Ramen?”

“Yeah. It’s too cold to go out,” you laugh. “Didn’t feel like putting on ten jackets just to get burnt pizza or something. I see you also are partaking in the art of instant noodles.”

He grins. “My friend wanted some and I didn’t feel like studying anymore. Perfect excuse.”

“Oh who’s your friend? Maybe I know them.”

“Yeosang. He lives in—”

“I know him!” you exclaim. “He’s the best study partner ever, I swear. I dunno how he does it; I think I’d die if I had to use that many equations.” You shake your head with a fond smile.

Before San can reply, however, a beeping rings through the room, causing you to pull away and tend to your noodles. Now in silence, he glances over to you, your lips pursed as you use a fork to strain the water out. 

Has he ever seen someone as cute as you? He’s sure that other people have the same unconscious habit, but there’s something so endearing about the way you pout in concentration to avoid burns or spillage. He could probably stay here forever just to keep talking to—

Your movement pulls him from his reverie, his eyes immediately falling to the tile as you grab the cover to your pot and prepare to head out. 

But instead of leaving right away, with the steaming pot in your hand, you turn to him. “I’ll see you around?”

His gaze shoots up from the floor. “Oh yeah! I’ll see you around.” 

The little wave with your free hand does him in before you disappear around the corner. He hardly knows you and yet he bets that when he goes to deliver Yeosang his dinner he’d even get on his knees and thank him for making him make ramen tonight. Maybe Yeosang would even offer to set up a—

Sighing, San rests his cheek on his knuckles with a small smile as he thinks of you. 

Oh, he’s down bad.

Tonight’s studying requires a midnight snack, you decide. So you gather all your cookware and make the short trip to the kitchen right next to your room. It should be a quick mission, in and out and straight back to biology. 

And it starts out that way.

You quickly fill the pot and turn on the stove, your foot tapping on the floor as you wait for the water to come to a boil. 

“I told you I’d see you around!” 

Your leg stills and you whip your head around, met with none other than the sight of Choi San. 

“Hey, San.” You move to the side, giving him room, almost reminiscent of last week. 

“Hi,” he grins, sliding into the space next to you.

“Back for more noodles?”

“Of course; I need my CS nerd fuel,” he quips. 

“Oh my god, thank you again for your help the other day.”

So maybe Yeosang is a good wingman, San thinks, the smile on his face growing softly. After finding out that his friend was in fact crushing on you (San wasn’t exactly subtle in his attempts to ask about you, to which Wooyoung shouted to the whole library), Yeosang reluctantly invited him to your weekly study sessions, and he’d in fact been able to help you with your homework (after Wooyoung called him a nerd and elbowed his ribs to get him to sit closer to you).

But if he thinks about it too long, his cheeks will get even redder, so he simply scratches his neck. “It’s no problem, really. Just lemme know if you need help or something.”

“Thanks, San.”

With both of your pots boiling, you begin to fill them with the noodle brick, but your eyes fall upon San’s overflowing with extra goodies.

“What’re those?” you ask, pointing to the floating rectangles at the top of the water.

“Fish tofu,” he grins. “You want some?”

“Oh, it’s okay,” you murmur, suddenly quiet. “I wouldn’t wanna take your dinner or something.”

“Don’t worry about it.” With those little dimples of his, he slides a couple pieces into your noodles, not another word filling the air between you.

You certainly don’t need to study to know the fact, through and through, that San is incredibly bad for your poor heart. 

And so, one coincidence turned into two, then four, and six. Choi San was just always in the kitchen making ramen. 

Even today, not long after you start boiling water, he comes in. It’s so expected now, and just being with him has become so natural. Shuffling through the doorway, he fills his pot without another sound before placing it on the stovetop next to yours.

“What’re you up to?” he asks, shoving his hands in his pockets and waiting next to you, your eyes all trained on the bubbles underneath the cover.

“Just tryna finish a lab report,” you reply. “You?”

“Needed a break from homework. I think I would’ve lost my mind if I had to think about recursion for another second without something to eat.”

With a small chuckle, the two of you fall into silence once more. Together, alone, you let yourself glance at his face. There’s something so puzzling about him, you realize. It’s as if he only lives in the kitchen. Sure, you’ve met him with your mutual friends on campus, but for someone who lives in the same building, he’s practically a ghost over here. 

“Can I ask you something?” you pipe up, breaking the peaceful lull. 

“Sure.” 

“How come I never see you? I only see you in the kitchen,” you laugh. “I thought I'd at least see you around going to class or doing laundry, just something.” 

He lowers his gaze, suddenly finding his noodles very interesting and stirring them with his chopsticks. “I, uh, I actually don't live on this side of the building,” he murmurs, unusually quiet. His words are barely an exhale, a faint breath that nearly doesn’t reach your ears. 

“Oh…” 

As the steam rises from the boiling pot, he smiles a little, a nervous blush beginning to color his cheeks. “I live on the other side. When we met I was only here because Yeosang asked me to make him some ramen.” 

You recall that windy day two months ago. Midterms season was dawning, so you can imagine the stress Yeosang must’ve been under to resort to asking San to make him something to eat. You hardly even saw the man unless he was scurrying to the dining hall, claiming he was going to die from studying so much physics.  

“I didnt wanna study so I came over and well…” 

“You kept coming over,” you finish. 

“Yeah,” he admits with a quiet laugh. “I just…like spending time with you.”

“Y’know,” you exhale, “you don’t need to make up reasons or walk across the building to see me.” 

His eyes widen. “Really!?” 

“Yeah.” A small grin laces your lips as you nod. “I like spending time with you too.” 

Comfortable silence falls upon you both as the minutes count down, the ticking of time for the small moments you share. You like spending time with him too. Maybe, even if you don’t feel the same way he does, you could at least be friends. You could be friends all on your own, without any meddling middle men. San thinks he’d like that, that he’d rather have you as a friend than be nothing at all. In whatever way you’ll accept his affection, that will be enough.

“Although, I do have a question.” 

His head pops up, wide eyes blinking back at you before they soften. “Shoot.” 

“How do you always know when I'm here when you live on the other side of the building?” 

Color rises to his cheeks once more, a deeper red definitely not from the heat of the steam. “My friends…my friends like to tease me. Y’know Jongho?” 

You nod. “He lives around the corner from me.” 

“He always texts me when he thinks he hears you going to the kitchen,” he admits before his eyes widen. “That's kinda creepy, wait. I'm so sorry! I swear I'll tell him to stop. I can stop com—“ 

You laugh before shaking your head, causing him to stare a little bewildered at you. “Please don’t stop. I like spending time with you, San. I like spending time with you… a little too much.”

He stands, eyes blown as he finally turns to you and blinks. “Huh.” 

“Gimme your phone.” 

Taking his device out of his pocket, he hands it to you silently, still gawking at you and your words. When your fingers brush he jumps back, his brain jumpstarting and observing you. There’s a silly smile lacing your lips as, wait, are you… you are! You’re putting your number into his contacts!? 

“Next time I'll just text you when I'm making ramen. Maybe I’ll even head over to your kitchen.”

Then you turn back to the stove, tending to your noodles as if you didn’t just so brazenly flirt with your crush while his jaw falls open. 

San thinks he could die right now. He could die right here, right now, and be perfectly content. Not only would he not have to take his computer science exam next week, but he also has the number of the cutest, funniest person in the university!? This has to be a dream.

You look up from your pot at the large “Ouch!” that rings through the room, turning to meet a San with furrowed brows stroking his forearm.

“Are you okay?” you gasp. “Did you burn yourself?”

“Yeah, sorry. I just had to pinch myself.”

“Huh?”

“I needed to make sure this isn’t a dream, y/n!”

Stifling a chuckle, you return to your noodles once more, the timer now up. “Well, you better call me and take me out on a date, Choi San. I’m counting on it.”

“Oh, you bet!”

It’s fitting that your first real, official date with Choi San is none other than a ramen outing. 

Stifling a giggle as he opens the door for you—ever a gentleman—you try your best to bite down on the large smile that threatens to overtake your features, but San knows better. 

“What!?” he whines, tugging on your jacket as the host leads you to your table and sliding it on the back of your chair. 

“Nothing,” you tease, still playing with his fingers and refusing to let go. “I just think it’s a little funny you wanted to come here for our first date after all the ramen we’ve already had.”

“Well I dunno if the instant ones count. I think we should have actual ramen instead of just making the ones from the value pack I got for a dollar,” he laughs. 

“Hm, maybe.”

And when the food arrives, you find yourself wanting to take everything back. 

“Oh, this looks delicious,” you gasp, your mouth forming a small circle as the steam rises towards you, drifting scents of savory broth and fresh noodles into your nose.

“I told you so!” he teases, his chopsticks already in hand as he admittedly drools over the bowl.

But somehow, San’s grin grows, his cheeky hand making its way over your tray and stealing a piece of tender beef sitting right on the top of the nest of food.

 The smile is still lacing his lips as he chews on the stolen bite, his eyes sparkling a little more at your small pout. “I just need to make sure it’s not too hot,” he quips. 

With a roll of your eyes and your own little quirk of your lips, you dig in, and you just know San was right. You really do need to have the real stuff, not the straight up sodium packs, no matter how many times they come in handy in a pinch.

But before you can even finish savoring the flavor and swallowing, your date has another trick up his sleeve, leaving a swarm of butterflies in your stomach. 

Picking up the best piece in between his chopsticks, he carefully places the perfectly cooked bit in the center of your bowl, those adorable dimples peeking through his pink blush, one that rises not just from the steam. How are you going to finish this meal when he just knows how to make you swoon? 

And, as if that wasn’t bad enough for your fragile heart, he repeats the action no less than three times, even taking it upon himself to blow on the bite then hold it to your lips until you finally eat it. 

Oh, this man is going to be the death of you. 

“He’s in the kitchen?” you ask, holding the phone between your ear and your shoulder as you prepare your pot and fish out a packet from your drawers.

“Yeah,” Seonghwa hums. “You coming?” 

“I’ll be over in a bit.”

“A bit” means less than five minutes as you sprint through the halls to make it over to the other side of the building before he leaves, not bothering to lock your door despite knowing you’ll probably end up hanging out in his room for the rest of the afternoon.

And, true to Seonghwa’s word, San is in the kitchen. With his back hunched over the stove, his hand steadying the pot, his small pout lacing his lips as a stray noodle hits the sink, he doesn’t even flinch at the pounding of footsteps running through the dorm. 

He’s so cute like that, so immersed in something seemingly so simple. But that’s San for you, doing everything with care and attention.

Maybe you’re just in a teasing mood, or maybe San and his friends have rubbed off on you, but an idea pops into your head as you take another moment to admire him. 

With a smile, you adjust your pitch an octave or two. “You’re super handsome.”

“Sorry, I’m not interested. I’m already taken,” San replies monotonously, not even looking up from his task at the intrusion. 

At your burst of laughter, he finally looks up, his eyes widening at your form collapsing to the ground and clutching your stomach as fits of giggles erupt over and over. 

“Huh!?”

“It’s just me, doofus!” 

Joining you on the floor, he kneels over you, tickling your sides with a fond grin before you both pull apart and sit back on your knees.

“You’re so silly,” he teases, tilting his head to the side.

“It’s true though! I was telling the truth!”

But with him looking at you…like that…that warm gaze and bright smile…the last of your laughter subsides, allowing your head to jump back to his words. 

He’s already taken? Well, you hadn’t exactly crossed over to that and had that discussion after your few dates, but…you’d like that, love that. 

“San—”

“Y/n—”

A hint of laughter comes to both of you before pittering out once more. 

“You go,” you murmur. 

“I know I said…” His voice is unusually soft, even more so as he takes a small breath and leaves the rest in the open. “But…if you aren’t comfortable with that…relationship…with me…right now, that’s okay. I can wait. If you want, I’ll wait for you. But as far as I’m concerned, there’s nobody else. So, whatever you want, I’ll make it work.”

His words are barely a whisper now. Glancing between you and his twiddling fingers, he’s never looked so nervous. You’d like nothing more to take his hand in yours and bring that dimpled smile back, easing his racing heart. And there isn’t a doubt in your heart anyway, so why wait? 

Scooting forward, you rest a hand on his shoulder, a small grin on your lips. “Maybe you haven’t figured it out yet but…I’m kind of impatient, y’know.”

And even when the timer goes off, you can’t wipe the smiles off your faces, the two of you playfully nudging the other before going back to San’s room to share his freshly made pot of ramen. It was about time for you to return the favor and start coming to this side of the building a lot more often.

[gingerlee-holds]

okay so this is gonna be something different lmao- my beloved @lionkid gave me an idea when i was visiting her and i wanted to make this for her-! its not a tword fic, but hopefully it'll become a good story if i keep at it- its the first chapter, and please let me know what you think!! i cant wait to build on it more heehee

also im sorry its kinda short lmao

the title for this story is Trains out of Tranton! enjoy <3

Chapter 1: Home

Words: 630 Warnings: Post-Apocalypse setting

It all happened so fast. I suppose it's easier to see the danger of a situation afterward when you have all the facts, and to us, it feels like the world that came before was a house of cards just begging to be toppled over. Frankly, it's a miracle that humankind lasted into the 20th Century. The scholar says the current year is 1996; we must take his word for it.

I am Jack Flynn, born to Samuel and Laurie in a world bereft of hope. The collapse of civilization was their childhood, a time of empty stomachs, and they were robbed of their American Dream. Samuel's tribe crossed paths with Laurie's in the ruins of Seattle during the most brutal blizzard in living memory, and my father chose to leave his people and join hers. Two decades ago, I came into this world one year after he made that choice, and with her final breath, my mother named me and promised me warmth.

Samuel Flynn, a natural leader, led our people from the old home in Seattle where wild dogs roam with foaming mouths and monstrous beasts proclaim themselves men. He brought us south from the bitter cold, and we found our new home in Tranton. Before the collapse, Tranton was a mere trainyard, but it took on a new role among the sick, hungry, and miserable survivors of my tribe. I was still in swaddling cloth then, not nearly old enough to form a memory of life before Tranton nor a perception of where elsewhere is. 

The world I know is far smaller than my father's. Tranton is barely three square miles in area, filled with thousands of people desperate for a place to sleep. The rails rust under torrential rain, springing forth moss and weeds between the tracks. Aspen saplings shot from the soil below in a mad frenzy, and the tallest of them stooped over our homes like giants. The boxcars of the old world make for tremendous homes for a tribe of hungry refugees, and the cars harbored two families each. Most importantly, though, those cars that could not be utilized for storage or transportation around the settlement were heaved onto their sides and became the walls upon which our soldiers stood watch against the horrors beyond.

From what our patrols inform us, every can of food for miles around has been eaten or destroyed by the elements. As such, Tranton must import their food from outside, and every week, a mule hauls a freight car into town, the shriek of ungreased axles announcing its arrival. The farms are among the few places unscathed by the collapse, and in return for the goods we can scavenge from the neighboring cities, they share with us their harvests. Well, that's not entirely true - those of us who can't scavenge become tinkerers, forming scrap metal into tools for survival and weapons against marauders. The turbines we've fashioned turn a fierce squall into a warm meal and a well-lit courtyard for my father to speak to our people from. Our home is at the edge of this courtyard, a diesel locomotive too old to turn its wheels but with a commanding presence over the surrounding cars. The roaring hearth I warmed my hands against was the firebox, and it was my father's responsibility to blow the train's whistle at sunrise each morning.

This whistle, choked with age, was what I awoke to every day for as long as I can recall. This whistle was normalcy, home. The whistle was the assurance that humankind had not yet died. The whistle promised that things were alright now and nothing needed changing. I hated that whistle; more than that, I hated the man who blew it.

[in-restless-walks]

okay i don't know sorry if this is a weird ask but right now im high and watching a youtube video of simon and garfunkel singin the boxer in the concert in central park and idk i got like a vibe from them so my question is are you a simon and garfunkel historian? do you know the context of their relationship during that moment? i don't know you i just searched simon and garfunkel and ended up in your blog so forgive me if you are not that kind of fan or something idk. i know that simon and garfunkel is big on tumblr but idk sometimes is like in a yaoi kind of way sometimes is like an ironic meme i dont know what im saying tbh im sorry for this. anyway if you don't know could you give me some blogs recomendations so i can ask them? is this a weird thing to ask? do i sound crazy? again im really high and this is taking too much to write because i don't know if i make sense sometimes i forget what word i put before the word i'm writing. anyway. can you help me with my issue? thanks a lot! oh for context i don't really know simon and garfunkel lore so just in case i need context i just know their relationship was like weird like sometimes they got along and then they missed each other or something? okay thanks! <3

Wow, okay, thanks for sending this, and first of all, I hope you enjoyed getting high, LOL. I guess there's nothing like getting high and starting to wonder about the yaoi side of Simon & Garfunkel.

I am not a Simon & Garfunkel historian, so to speak, but I have been a fan for quite some time and I have read all the biographies there are to read, I have done my fair share of research into them, so I do think I know a bit about the S&G "lore". Ever since the first time I saw the Concert in Central Park and seeing the same "vibe" you did during The Boxer, I've also 'shipped' them. That is to say, while I do not think that they were ever in a romantic relationship and everything that that entails, I don't rule out at all that anything of a sexual nature happened between them. Other people seem to think that too, hence the 'yaoi' posts you see on tumblr.

Their relationship was/is a really complicated one and I'm not sure any of us know exactly what happened to make them where they are now - supposedly on no speaking terms. I mean, Paul said in his recent documentary that Art turned from someone who 'got it for him" into someone he hopes never to see again, which...ouch x 1000.

For you and for everyone else getting into Simon & Garfunkel, here's a little crash course.

TL;DR they're both idiots who got along reasonably well if it wasn't about their professional business. Their creative differences re: music (and personal grievances) were always so large (as were their egos) that they followed a pattern of getting together to try (again), fought, were on no speaking terms for a decade, thought to give it another try, and repeat, ad infinitum. In fanfic terms, they are the epitome of strangers to friends to lovers to enemies to friends to lovers to enemies to...

1950s

Paul and Art are childhood friends. They lived a few streets away from each other in Queens, NY, and they went to the same school. They're the same age, born three weeks apart. They formally met when they were eleven, at the school play for Alice in Wonderland (Paul was the White Rabbit, Art the Cheshire Cat). Soon after, they started recording songs in their basements, trying to copy their heroes, the Everly Brothers. They got signed by Big Records by someone called Sid Prosen, called themselves Tom (Art) and Jerry (Paul) and released a fairly successful single called 'Hey Schoolgirl' when they were 16, which even made them go on Dick Clark's American Bandstand show (footage sadly does not survive). Paul recorded a song by himself, without telling Art, while he called himself True Taylor, and Art found out, 'shattering' the friendship with Paul for the first time. (It seems to have never recovered to how it was before). I coin this the True Taylor Incident™️. Alledgedly they didn't speak to each other for a couple of years after graduating high school (1958-1962-ish). During that time, Art recorded a few songs as Artie Garr, and Paul did as well, as Jerry Landis.

1960s

Paul went to study in Queens College, NY, and Art went to Columbia University (there he met his blind roommate Sanford, which is a whole other interesting side story). Paul and Art got reacquainted with each other, performed as a duo again and managed to get signed to Columbia records to record an album in March 1964, which was to be released in October 1964.

Meanwhile, Paul often went to England and mainland Europe (France, Denmark, the Netherlands...) and there he met Kathy who became his girlfriend (Hence, Kathy's Song, and "Kathy I'm lost, I said" from America). He also recorded a solo album while in the UK, called The Paul Simon Songbook. Art went to visit him a few times.

Their first album, Wednesday Morning 3AM, flopped; Art stayed in school and Paul went back to the UK. The album did contain the song The Sound of Silence (acoustic version) and a really interesting thing happened in late 1965 when someone decided to put electric guitars to the track and suddenly it got airplay. Paul was in Denmark when the song was really starting to do well on the charts, and he had to rush home to NYC when the song became number one.

Then, Paul and Artie were suddenly famous! They quickly recorded another album with several songs that were on The Paul Simon Songbook, but now Art's harmonies were on there. They did a lot of tv performances in 1966 and 1967 and toured mainly in the college and university circuits. (I will link some tv peformances and so on later, in another post).

I'm skipping over some things now, but in my opinion, trouble for their relationship really began again when they started recording their album Bookends and Paul had been writing music for The Graduate (Mrs. Robinson) (1968). The director of The Graduate, Mike Nichols, had asked Art and Paul to act in his next movie, Catch-22, but Paul's scenes got cut, and Art went to Mexico on his own for the better part of the first half of 1969, just when they were supposed to record their next album, Bridge Over Troubled Water. Tensions ran super high at that time. Plus, Paul had written the song Bridge Over Troubled Water for Art to sing, but he later said that Art first refused to sing it (Art said that he wanted Paul to sing it in a lovely falsetto voice) and later, during concerts, Art took standing ovations while finishing the song, while Paul was jealous that he didn't get songwriting credits on stage. Paul also said that Art was leaving him to do movies...not long after Catch-22, Art got invited to play a role in Mike Nichols' next movie, Carnal Knowledge. (see also: Why Don't You Write Me...."if it's only to say that you're leaving me"). The whole Bridge Over Troubled Water album is one big breakup album.

Meanwhile, Paul had gotten married to Simon & Garfunkel's manager's ex-wife (I still can't fathom this) and Peggy also kind of encouraged him to go solo. Paul also claimed that his musical interests and Art's were drifting apart, so eventually, they split in 1970. Artie thought they were only taking a break, and allegedly he didn't realize they were really done.

1970s

Both starting solo careers, they reunited a few times as well, such as for the McGovern benefit concert in 1972, and most notably in the second Saturday Night Live episode in 1975 (tell me they're not flirting the whole time). Paul had even written a song, My Little Town, that the both of them performed for the reunion and was featured on both of their (solo) albums There was also a reunion for Paul's The Paul Simon Special (1977), the Brittania Awards (1977) and some other benefit concerts.

1980s

Paul was approached by a concert producer about playing in Central Park and maybe doing a few songs with Art, and Paul was like, I can't very well play support to Simon & Garfunkel, so it was decided that the whole concert was supposed to be the both of them. And time it was, what a time it was! Safe to say the concert was a success, even though they were fighting again (Art wanted to stay as close to the accoustic sets they used to do in the college performances, and Paul wanted a big band on stage). The interviews before the performance are awkward as usual, but it seems that for the performance itself they kind of set their differences aside, and they seem to be having a good time on stage, as good as it gets with these two. The back rub during The Boxer is...I can't explain it, but that was a lovely gesture by Art.

Because the concert in Central Park had been so successful, they were going to bank on that success and do a whole reunion tour AND a reunion album in 1982-1983, but that seems to have been a very miserable experience for them both. Their body language in interviews says it all. It culminated in Paul wiping Art's vocals from what was supposed to be their reunion album and releasing it as a solo album. Safe to say they were on no speaking terms again for a while, lmao, especially when their professional endeavours were concerned. They did hang out sometimes in private, because Paul had married Carrie Fisher and Art was seeing Carrie's friend Penny. Then Paul got famous with Graceland and Artie was once again, forgotten.

1990s

They got inducted in the Hall of Fame (another miserable experience), Paul did another concert in Central Park (without any sign of Art this time) and they did a few reunion concerts in NYC and so, but neither of them looked very happy about that, if you ask me. In fact, the less they had to look at each other, the better. There was apparently one instance where they were fighting and someone had to stand in between them, or they would have physically started attacking each other? Sounds like a lot of fun, huh? Start of another decade of not speaking to each other.

2000s

After getting a Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award, they thought it was a good idea to get together again and do a reunion your, and that seemed to work, for a while. They toured the United States (2003-2004), Europe (2004), Australia/NZ and Japan (2009) and were about to embark on yet some more shows in the fall of 2010, but then Art Lost His Voice (you can see this happening right in front of your salad at the April 2010 Jazz Fest, but they were still very chummy then).

What happened in 2010...no idea, but it wasn't good. And then Art made things much, much worse when he did an interview in 2015, called Paul a Monster, and idiot and a jerk, and how could he leave a successful formula like Simon & Garfunkel behind and no amount of groveling that Art has done since (like begging Paul to call him in an interview) has helped. They are still on no speaking terms.

Now all we can do is wait and hope they come to their senses and kind of make up before they die. Under no circumstances do I still want them to sing together, but damn, if all of us don't want them to just both sit on the edge of a park bench, like bookends, I don't know anymore.

My take on the whole thing: they were good friends as kids, Art never got over the True Tailor Incident and that stayed with him forever; he always saw Paul as someone who could betray him in the blink of an eye. Paul was envious of Art's looks (and height); meanwhile Art wasn't a songwriter, so Paul had that advantage over him. It's not a good balance to be in such a close partnership. Perhaps at one point something did happen between them, complicating things even more, because can you really hate someone that much if you don't have strong feelings for them either? In later years, it seems to be mainly the "creative differences" about the music that was causing a rift, but maybe after all is said and done, perhaps Carrie Fisher said it best "not only do I not like you, but I don't like you personally." Paul 'cheated' on Art with True Taylor and, like any other one half of a (married) couple, he tried to get over it, but never could. (and maybe Paul is a jerk lmao. But Art was no angel either).

I've skipped over a lot of things, so if you have more questions, shoot. There are quite a few of us who are posting regularly about them, and who know about everything I've written above. In fact, there's a Tumblr community on S&G now (see my pinned post) but so far there haven't been many people interested in joining, lol, so if you want in, let me know. People could do a lot more theorizing there, haha.