#Also this is not satire

[aweirdbugcreature]

So like, i know this matter to literally no one, but a close friend that i had known for 6 years said if we want to watch Smiling Friends and try smoking a bong for the first time, we should do it in an Hotel or something, cause his family can't know he smoked pot nor can mine.

And like, is all fine and dandy, but i had a crush on this dude for a good chunk of those 6 years, and being one night in an enclosed space just him and me, terrifies me.

Like, i feel in one way it would be so fucking funny the mental image of making out while a smiling friend's episode plays in the backround. But also, i do not want to start anything AT ALL, cause i've never dated or done anything, and i'm so afraid of commitment the only thing i commit is to the bit. Also i'm really fucking weird so that's that.

And like, it also might just be all on my mind, and i'm just making scenarios in my head that are not true, but so many people had asked me if i'm certain he doesn't have a crush on me when i talk about him, cause he seems to like me a lot.

But also one part of me is really excited cause we might play mario kart, and i'm gonna show him the bands i listen to when i'm high, and we are gonna watch so many TV shows. Idk.

I just think he's important to me, and i wouldn't like to ruin one of the only good things left i have on my life, just by doing something impulsive. I don't want to lose a friendship like that.

I'm thinking of wearing the most nerdy, neon flashing, trashy t-shirt i own, just cause it would bring the scale into "Fun hangout with best buddy #bromance(gn)" and not into "friends to lovers First kiss only one bed" thrope in real life.

But still, nothing might happen anyways, this could be all in my head.

[inkskinned]

don't worry, they're joking! they're always joking when it would be something, like bigoted. because i'm not a bigot, obviously, i just vote for bigots - well, they're not bigots either, you can't really call someone a bigot just because they have religious views. this is the land of the free, and it's a christian nation, after all. you can pretend otherwise but let's just be real here; all our values are really based on the bible. anyway, i know you liberals get your panties in a twist - can i say that, or are you gonna cancel me, haha, #metoo - about every little joke he said and every little dramatic political view. oh, fascist this and fascist that. you are online too much, you love the word fascist because it's big and you're just paranoid about things.

well, no, i don't, like, read the policies. i have a life. and so what if they wrote - stop it, it's not a manifesto, okay? he eventually backed off from that - oh the vice president? who cares about that guy, that isn't real power. you're being dramatic, they're just spitballing. everyone makes big claims when they're out there campaigning. he just means he personally wouldn't get gay married. you want him to divorce his wife and get gay married? anyway, even if they cancelled gay marriage - it wouldn't happen, okay? nobody i know really cares about that - it'd be states-rights like those abortions you love so much. and you live in a blue state. you live in like the gay capital of the world. i don't know why it'd be so bad for you, you're borrowing trouble there.

and besides, you're missing the point of his campaign! you people want to be victims so bad you completely ignore what we're really voting for. there are tons of good things that happened because of his name and his policies - the economy, for one. oh stop, just because i can't tell you what a tariff is off the top of my head doesn't mean i don't have eyes. and stuff was better under him! well, yeah, anything good is his work, obviously. what? no, all the bad stuff was biden. and probably also obama. what do you even care about this, anyway? it's not going to effect you. it's four years.

oh my god, not the climate change argument again, i'm not getting into that. i don't care about it. if my house is beachfront that's great news for me. and we don't really know what's causing it. no, i saw you forwarded me those articles and i just laughed. what, do you think i have time to sit on my ass and read shit? huh? well, no, i like reading the babylon bee. they actually had a great article about all you climate freaks. and in the meantime, what do you want me to do? i'm not paying 4 dollars for gas. liberals love to talk about solutions but never pay for the solutions. what do you mean blocked because of congress. you gotta stop with the conspiracy shit.

no, my side doesn't have real conspiracy theories. the vaccine thing is a real thing. besides, you yourself don't like big pharma. just because i have an opinion, suddenly now you think big pharma is great? and this is serious, okay? your mom's friend's coworker has a kid that died from a heart event. i don't want you getting any more vaccines. i regret that you got them as a kid, i'd redo them. what do you mean you'd vaccinate your own kids? are you finally thinking of having some? you know i want grandkids - oh stop, i've never pressured you, i'm just saying that if you're going to get gay married, you might as well give me some normal grandkids to love.

stop, you know what i meant. what? no, he's not going to take away your right to adopt. besides, you could always use a sperm donor, haha, i know your high school ex would love to - jesus! okay! no need to snap. i'm just saying that you don't need to be married to have a kid. the only real benefit to marriage is taxes, haha. it won't change anything. oh my god, no, there won't be a rise in hate crimes. well, it's not his fault what people do in his name! he eventually spoke out against that, anyway.

what do you mean he supported them? i didn't hear him say that. oh. well, yeah, he said it, but like, he's clearly joking.

[turbo-tsundere]

An AU where technically nothing’s changed, except everyone knows Tsumugi is the mastermind, and that they’re trapped in a show: but not only they're still helpless against her and cannot escape (neither can Tsumugi herself) - they also have to deal with her contractualy obligated sponsorship announcements during trials and investigations... including 30-second-long unskipabble ads before the monitor presents voting results and the blackened.

What dignity? What respect? Everything is a commercialised farce, and everyone, including Tsumugi, is perpetually oscillating between exasperated apathy and resigned frenzy.

Their sanity is doing fine, they tell themselves.

The Show Must (Not) Go On.

I’ve kept this thing in my drafts for uhhhh...

This long.

Over 2 yeaarrrsssss. Because I felt self-consciouss about posting drawings in this style. But idgaf anymore it’s part of my soul. Enjoy.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

MDZS x Brazil (1985)

(Yes. Real movie dialogue)

[bookburners]

I’m about to write Batfamily fanfiction starring ONLY the girls, Helena will be there, Babs will be there, Stephanie will be there, Cass will be there, Kate will be there, for the hell of it Dinah will show up.

The batboys you ask

Tim will be in one scene make a joke about zesti then never show up again.

Dick will be the supportive mom who’s serious and down to earth, only appearing when used as a plot device.

Both Jason and Damian will be tagged never show up and you will be lucky if they are even mentioned.

Bruce will be in Hong Kong.

[nostalgebraist]

Trying to picture how myself from early 2015 would react if I told him that 10 years later, he'd be freaking out and doomscrolling the news because

"Elon Musk and President Donald Trump, acting through the new federal organization 'DOGE,' are trying to implement Mencius Moldbug's plan to 'reboot the government' by mass-retiring government employees"

[giantkillerjack]

You shouldn't get a wheelchair, walker, cane, shower chair, or any kind of assistive technology mobility aid because then you might become dependent on them. Just like how you also shouldn't get glasses if you have bad eyesight because then you might become dependent on those.

For instance, if you end up stuck using corrective eyewear, you could actually lose your ability to tell what things are even when they are extremely blurry! You need to get used to having migraines from seeing unclearly because if you wear glasses all the time, you are basically giving up!! You don't need to see things coming at you from far away! You just need to get good at dodging, and if you can't, then you have no one to blame but yourself!!

For example, I read a really heart-worming article recently about a girl who was stuck using glasses - just absolutely, tragically trapped in her eyewear from dawn to dusk, even though she was good and never ever complained; and I heard she trained herself to discern the blurry faces of her loved ones with 60% accuracy! - she was even able to walk down the aisle at her wedding WITHOUT forcing the discomfort of seeing a woman in glasses on all her guests!!

Sure, she had to give her vows with a splitting headache, and she couldn't see her husband's expression when he said "I do," but overall, SO inspi-ration-al!!! So up-lifting!!

(She didn't even have to use a seeing eye cane, which would have been the worst-case scenario, obviously, because she worked hard to make sure she looked LESS disabled, not MORE disabled!!! Everyone knows blind people exist solely to be a cautionary tale to sighted people!!)

Also, did you know some people get glasses when they only need them a little bit?? How selfish of them! Sure, there's not a shortage, and an increase in demand would result in overall increased accessibility to glasses--but emotionally it's like taking glasses away from someone who needs them more! After all, if everyone who needed glasses got them, then...... um...... more people would have glasses! Which is probably bad!!!!

I also had a friend who was trapped in glasses who saved up all her money for laser eye surgery, and I don't know why everyone doesn't just do that! Sure, some doctors say some people don't "qualify" and it "won't help" those people, but that's why you can't give up!! You don't want to be one of those people!

After all, what's the worst thing that could happen with an unnecessary laser surgery to the face that comes with crippling debt??? It's worth the risk to gain your FREEDOM back, and I'm so proud of my friend!!

Tragically, she did die later that year while driving Uber and squinting at street signs, but at least now I know my friend is finally free from the shackles of her terrible eyesight. #ripAshley #rippedAshley #justripit 😌😌😌❤😇😇😇

And that's why you shouldn't get used to using a mobility aid!! Because, like glasses, they are inherently embarrassing to be seen with; and - like glasses - it is more noble to suffer silently than to depend on unnatural technologies that force you to rely on them; AND - just like glasses - by abstaining from using them, you DEFINITELY benefit SO many people in tangible life-changing ways!!! (Besides, everyone else will be so much more comfortable if you just look normal! 😊)

I hope you learned something today. 💖

[xombie1000]

how i imagine fans of south park characters 2 look like cuz i love making fun of myself so much

cartman fans go both wayz

[the-way-astray]

homophobic goodreads reviews of unraveled genuinely sound like a satirical tumblr post making fun of homophobes

like this is goofy-ass behavior. just saying there's definitely a tumblr user who has made fun of homophobes by satirically saying something eerily similar to this

[prismaticflare]

Love how we’re not even 2 seasons into Dragon’s Rising and all of the original ninja’s lives are already going to shit

Lloyd - Plagued by horrific visions and pressure of being a good teacher.

Zane - Lost his girlfriend and is being chased down by an organization to kill him for being “property”

Nya - Lost both her brother AND will be losing her boyfriend. Nothing else happened to Nya because women’s only problems revolve around the men in their lives /s

Jay - Literally lost ALL of his memories and friends and whole life. Also now works a 9-5, which is arguably worse.

Cole - gay

Kai - Sent to the fucking shadow realm

Can’t wait to see them get even more traumatized!

[mossadspypigeon]

[rohirric-hunter]

It's so funny to me when I tell people, "You can't depend on an AI for that, it has to be done by a human," they're always like, "You're just afraid of technology." I'm not afraid of it. I understand it. And I know that an AI is never going to be able to comprehend things like context, which come naturally to a human and are essential to all kinds of information gathering and parsing.

Like yeah, there are uses for AI technology. The bread-sorting computer comes to mind. But that doesn't mean I want an AI to analyze the results of my google searches. Last night I googled, "Where to find iron ore minecraft," and Google's AI told me to dig 15 blocks down from anywhere and promised me that 100% I would find iron ore. Because the computer lacks the ability to look at phrases like "y level 15" and go, "huh, I wonder what that means, maybe I should look that up." It also lacks the ability to get the first apparent answer (y level 15) and then think that there might be more information (likelihood of spawning, size of spawns) and keep reading for that information. It doesn't know that's relevant information. And you can't teach these skills to a computer. People think that you can solve these problems by simply feeding more information into the computer but you can't. It just confuses it. And even if you could, what's the proposition? To fill a computer with the sum total of all human knowledge? I trust I don't have to say why that's a bad idea? The only thing you can do is manually block bad answers and replace them with good ones. By a human. Which means that all of those fixed answers... are not AI generated. :/

[isabelguerra]

I always make an effort to look at paranatural through the ~2013 era lens it was conceptualized from, back when it was at it’s most subversive, in tandem alongside its contemporary lens. Because thats what Paranatural was, for those who aren’t aware — paranatural played off of & against the common shonen & cartoon tropes and character expectations that were prevalent in that age: the wise and just mentor, the prejudiced bully, the action girl implemented to pushback against sexism + the subversion of the action girl, the excited rare skilled selfless battleprone protagonist, etc.

most new fans will likely see the comic and take it at face value — why shouldn’t they? — when in reality there’s so much more of a dialogue happening underneath the hood. There is so much underlying, forgotten context that makes paranatural, paranatural

[daily-teki]

Day 104: hello and welcome to my TED talk, bet you didn’t know that miku and gashu were related

(Please note that I haven’t included characters like Anzu and Kurumada seeing as their hair is canonically dyed and not their natural colour)

Also, by the time you read this it’ll be my 18th birthday!! Yippee!!

[catdemons13]

@fr-likes-chocolate be like: i love this 😍😍😍

[differentlylimbed]

shoutout to people with heavily stigmatized conditions that don't get talked about much online!

severe physical disability

severe physical disability

intellectual disability

severe physical disability

rare genetic disease

degenerative disability

severe physical disability

DID/OSDD-1