#Also the fight was their first step on their journey to making out with each other but whatever

[yourbiggestcrybaby]

The Lake

Clarisse La Rue X Reader

Warnings: um reader almost drowns, suggestive parts kinda, aggression, idk

You and Clarisse had never quite got along. She teased you and was outright rude. You hated her! Or at least that’s what you kept telling yourself . After one fight (over a freaking practice target) ends up in Clarisse accidentally drowning you. Turns out she’s not as mean as you expected…

Life at Camp Half-Blood was like stepping into a whole new world. As a demigod, you had always felt like something of an outsider, never quite fitting in anywhere. But when you arrived at camp about three weeks ago, everything suddenly clicked into place.

You had only realized your identity after being attacked on your way home from school. Your day had been completely normal. The regular mundane classes and hanging out with friends. You were on your way home, walking to the bus stop and that is when disaster struck. You couldn’t remember what had happened. All you knew was that you had been attacked from behind. You felt massive claws dig into your back and you had passed out. Thankfully, you were saved by a stranger who turned out to be a fellow demigod. It was a terrifying experience, but it opened your eyes to a reality you had never imagined.

The journey to Camp Half-Blood with your frantic mother was a blur of explanations and disbelief. She told you about the monsters that had attacked you, about the dangers that lurked in the world beyond camp, and about the truth of your heritage. At first, you thought you were losing your mind, but as you stepped through the gates of camp and saw others like you, training and honing their skills, everything suddenly made sense.

The first few weeks at camp were overwhelming. Making friends, exploring camp, and learning to fight—all of it was scary, but it was also exhilarating. For the first time in your life, you felt like you belonged somewhere.

But then came Clarisse La Rue, and everything changed. Strong, fearless, and undeniably beautiful, she also had a mean streak a mile wide. Your feud with her started almost immediately, sparked by a prank that went too far.

It began with Clarisse and her friends stealing your clothes while you were in the shower. Left with nothing but a towel, you had to walk back to your cabin in front of the entire camp, humiliated and angry. Clarisse's laughter only made it worse, and when you confronted her about it, she just smirked and made a crude joke stating, “what’s wrong angel? Maybe I just wanted to see you in a towel”

Disgusting! Well that’s what you told yourself. You hoped she hadn’t seen the flush on your cheeks or the way your breathing sped up.

From that moment on, it seemed like every interaction with Clarisse ended in a fight. Insults were thrown, tempers flared, and the tension between you grew with each passing day.

You had been trying to take the high road, to rise above Clarisse's constant taunts and jibes, but it seemed like she always found a way to get under your skin. Her ability to fluster you with just a few words was infuriating, and you were tired of letting her walk all over you.

It was a sunny Saturday afternoon when you finally decided you'd had enough. As you went about your usual activities at camp, your mind was made up: you were going to stand up Clarisse and put an end to her bullying once and for all.

Training beside the lake, practicing throwing daggers at a target, you were feeling unusually relaxed. That was until Clarisse showed up with her usual entourage, her presence casting a shadow over your newfound peace.

Turning around to face her, you squared your shoulders and looked her dead in the eye. "What do you want, La Rue?" you said, your tone dripping with defiance.

Clarisse smirked, her eyes wandering up and down your body. "You're at my target," she quipped, gesturing toward the bullseye on the target you had been practicing on.

"Really?" you retorted, feeling a surge of adrenaline. "Last time I checked, it didn’t have your name on it." You cringed internally at your own words, realizing they sounded like something out of a bad action movie.

She rolled her eyes and looked at you again defiantly. “If you don’t move, I guess I’ll just have to I’ll make you”

You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for what was to come. "You know what, La Rue? I'm tired of your games," you said, your voice steady despite the nerves that churned in your stomach. "If you want to fight, let's settle this once and for all."

Clarisse's grin faltered, replaced by a look of surprise and then anger. "You think you can take me on?" she snapped, her eyes narrowing with hostility.

"I know I can," you replied, your voice falsely confident. "Unless, of course, you're too scared to face me without your little entourage."

That really made her mad. She gestured for her friends to back off and picked up her spear from the ground. This was so stupid! You were going to get your ass beat over a target. You were thinking about backing down but you had always been stubborn, and the beady glint in Clarisse’s eyes only fuelled you on.

Clarisse came at you with a ferocity that took you by surprise. She moved with lightning speed, her spear flashing in the sunlight as she struck again and again. You barely had time to react as you dodged and blocked her hits, feeling the force reverberate through your arms.

You hadn’t expected her to be so aggressive. This girl obviously had some pent up anger.

Despite your best efforts, Clarisse's meticulous hits soon had you on the defensive. You could feel yourself being pushed back, your footing becoming unsteady as you struggled to keep up with her relentless onslaught.

But then, due to both sheer luck and desperation, you managed to turn the tide. Ducking under one of Clarisse's swings, you seized the opportunity to land a solid strike square on her side. The impact sent her stumbling backward, momentarily stunned.

Seizing the opportunity, you pressed your advantage, launching a series of attacks that left Clarisse reeling. Before Clarisse could fully recover, you found yourself on top of her, straddling her as you pinned her to the ground. The world seemed to stand still as you looked down at her, the heat of the fight still coursing through your veins.

You couldn’t help but notice the light blush that spread across her cheeks and the way she glanced quickly at your lips.

But then, to your surprise, Clarisse's lips curled into a smirk, and she looked up at you with a glint in her eye. "You know, for someone who claims to hate me so much, you, you seem to really enjoy being on top of me." she said, her voice low and husky.

You felt your cheeks flush at her words, your mind momentarily distracted by her suggestion. And in that split second of distraction, Clarisse seized her opportunity.

With a swift and decisive move, she managed to flip you off of her, regaining the upper hand in the fight. Before you could react, she was on her feet, her spear pointed at your chest.

"Nice try, newbie," she said, her tone laced with amusement. "But it looks like I win this round."

Before you could protest, Clarisse reached out and shoved you backward, sending you tumbling into the lake with a splash

Turning around to her friends she laughed and high fives them.

“Seriously Clarisse?” One of her siblings said “I know you wanted to prove your point but this seems too far”

Clarisse froze, her laughter dying in her throat as she looked up at her sister, confusion etched on her face. “What do you mean?” she asked.

“You know she can’t swim...right?” her sister replied, her expression grave.

Time seemed to stand still for Clarisse as realization washed over her. What had she done? Without another thought, she sprinted over to the lake, her heart pounding in her chest. She could feel panic seizing her body as she scanned the water's surface, desperately searching for any sign of you.

And then she saw you, your form still and unmoving at the bottom of the lake. Without hesitation, Clarisse dove in, the weight of her heavy metal armor dragging her down. But she paid it no mind as she reached you, wrapping her arms around your still form and propelling you upward toward the surface.

Breaking through the water's surface, Clarisse gasped for breath, dragging you with her as she swam to the shore. As she laid you down on the ground, she could feel her heart pounding in her chest, her hands trembling as she frantically checked for a pulse.

When she found none, panic threatened to overwhelm her. Without hesitation, she began performing CPR, the sound of her own ragged breaths mingling with the rhythm of her compressions. With each breath, she prayed for a response, a sign that you were still alive.

And then, after what felt like an eternity, you coughed and sputtered, your eyes fluttering open as you gasped for air. Relief flooded through Clarisse as she pulled you into a tight embrace, her hands shaking with emotion.

“Thank gods” she said, looking up to the sky as if she was actually thanking them.

You were in shock. What had just happened? Within the span of about twenty minutes, Clarisse had challenged you to a duel, had beaten you at said duel, had tried to drown you, and had then saved you.

You looked up at her, eyes wide, “I’m using the target”

She looked at you slightly perplexed, that’s what you cared about? Not the fact that she had almost killed you?

“Whatever you say pretty girl”

[chizu117]

Do these idiots not remember that Laios literally hit Shuro first lmao like no way you guys can’t even read picture books anymore

Also, courtesy of another asian in the chat

[iveleftitwithyou]

casual | paul lahote x reader smut

NSFW | 18+ | minors DNI | word count: 2.38k

warnings: smut, dom!paul, slight angst, mention of fighting, i think that's it?

------

i asked you guys if i should post this now or incorporate it into ruderal, and the result was overwhelmingly to post it now, so here it is with some plot adjustments! i've been OBSESSED with this song by chappell roan and knew i needed to make it into an imagine, although this song is probably about a woman lol. highly recommend listening to the song as you read this. this is my first time EVER writing smut so i hope its not too bad - as always, let me know what you think :)

ALSO this is in an alternate timeline where the guys are all like 21+ and so is y/n :)

------

Paul’s hand lingered on your thigh as he drove the winding road back to Forks, his thumb rubbing small circles on your outer leg. the radio hummed with a song you couldn’t manage to pay attention to, instead focusing your gaze on the motion of his finger on your bare thigh. while you assumed the gesture was meant to comfort you, it did a lot more than that. you hoped that the darkness would obscure Paul’s peripheral vision enough for him to not realize you were ogling his muscular arms and unusually large hands. his veins protruded in a way that drove you crazy for some reason, and as much as you were still upset with him, you couldn’t help the rush of hormones that flooded at the sight.

Embry had made some stupid joke about you at the bonfire at Emily's that night, a common occurrence when you hung out with the pack. he didn’t mean anything by it, you joked around with each other like that all the time, but Paul had been extra sensitive for the last few weeks as he spent more hours on patrol. Victoria’s looming presence and the mystery murders happening around Washington meant the reservation needed increased protection, and the men in the pack had to step up. Embry’s comment led to a fight where the pair both phased, snarling and snapping until they both came to their senses and things went back to normal. you hated when Paul shifted because of you, even if it was just indirectly your fault like it was tonight. 

you two were meant to be casual, despite Paul having imprinted on you, as you had just gotten out of a long-term relationship and weren’t ready to commit to someone again. you’d been seeing each other casually for months, hanging out, and getting to know each other better. as much as you were hesitant to let him into your life completely, you couldn’t deny your attraction to Paul. he’d been nothing but a gentleman thus far, bringing you flowers on dates, opening doors for you, and following your boundaries to a T, terrified to mess anything up with you. of course, his physical form was unlike anything you’d ever seen - you were lucky that he preferred to hang out without a shirt on. things had gotten hot and heavy between you two a few times but hadn’t gone farther than some very intense making out. though, the way Paul’s hand touched you now was enough for you to throw those boundaries out the window; you wanted him - no, needed him.

you focused your eyes back on the road in front of you, only being able to see as far as the truck’s dim headlights illuminated. breathe in, breathe out, you reminded yourself, trying to calm down the butterflies in your stomach. you were unsuccessful, and it didn’t help that Paul’s hand was inching closer and closer to your hips.

suddenly, his hand snaked further inward and his grip tightened, engulfing your inner thigh. your breath hitched, and you unsuccessfully tried to mask it as a cough. you saw Paul smirk out of the corner of your eye, but he didn’t look over at you. 

you once again reminded yourself to breathe as the ache between your legs became more apparent. his hand loosened its grip and continued its journey towards your core. half of you thought about stopping him purely as punishment for fighting with Embry, but the much louder other half wouldn’t dream of it right now.

you couldn’t help but let out a small groan as his hand finally reached your jean shorts, his fingers tracing the seam that ran between your legs. the slight pressure he applied drove you absolutely crazy as you wished for more friction.

the sound that escaped your lips seemed to do something to Paul as he let out a breathy groan of his own. “alright, that’s it,” he mumbled, turning the wheel toward the side of the road. he must have known exactly where you were because he easily pulled the truck behind a set of bushes that obscured most of it from the road. any passerbys, which were few and far between at this time of night anyway, wouldn’t notice the vehicle.

almost as soon as he slammed the gear shift into park, his lips were on yours. he kissed you with a passion you’d never felt before. you melted into his lips, reminding yourself for the third time that night that if you didn’t start breathing, you would pass out. he gripped the back of your head, tangling his fingers in your hair as you continued to make out. his other hand traveled down your arm, to your hip, and unbuckled the seatbelt you’d been wearing. in one swift, but slightly awkward motion, he disconnected your lips for a brief moment and grabbed each side of your hips, pulling you across the center console onto his lap. you were careful not to lean too far and hit the horn with your back as you settled onto him, silently thanking Paul for owning such a spacious truck. your knees settled on either side of his legs. 

as you sat down on his lap, you brushed his hardening length with the same seam of your shorts his hand was just on, eliciting a quiet moan from both of you. impatient, Paul once again gripped your scalp and slammed your lips together. you allowed your hands to slip underneath the hem of his shirt, feeling the outline of the muscles on his bare abdomen. this feeling, combined with the warmth radiating from his bare skin, drove you insane. 

“take- it- off-” you mumbled in between kisses, tugging the hem upwards. you were unsure of where the forwardness came from, but you didn’t stop long enough to be embarrassed. 

“you don’t get to tell me what to do,” he snarked half-jokingly but obliged.

the moonlight streaming in from the windshield was just enough for you to be able to see the outline of his pecs and abs, and you really couldn’t help but stare.

“like what you see?” he chuckled, noticing your eyes widening at his physique.

you nodded, unable to form words, instead opting to smash your lips back together with all of the strength you could muster. you’d had enough of looking flustered - you wanted to take initiative.

you raised your hips again, pushing your abdomen against Paul's and lowering yourself onto his member. you rocked your hips back and forth as he moved his lips down your cheek, then your jaw, and eventually to your neck. the friction as you continued to grind against him elicited a low growl against your neck as his lips attached to your skin. you moaned embarrassingly loudly as he sucked at the delicate skin, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to be sheepish. in fact, the only emotion surging through your body right now was pure desire for the god-like man leaving a series of hickeys on your neck.

“Paul, that’s gonna leave a mark,” you whined. you knew you’d regret letting him do it in the morning but right now you wanted nothing more than for him to mark you as his. you wanted to be his.

“don’t want anyone else getting any ideas. you’re all mine,” he retorted, lifting his head up to look you in the eyes. his were almost completely black with lust. “say it.” he commanded, holding your jaw tightly in his hand. “say you’re mine.”

“i’m all yours, Paul” you panted, your hips continuing to move back and forth on Paul’s lap as you stared into his dark eyes. despite your relationship still being undefined, truer words had never been spoken.

“good girl. now shut the fuck up and get back in the passenger seat.” his harsh words did nothing to discourage you from obeying as you scrambled to sit back where you were a few minutes prior. this was a side of Paul you had only seen when he was angry: dark, commanding, dominating. usually, you would have to try to calm him down when he got like this, but right now, you were very much enjoying him telling you what to do. you already missed the warmth of his body on yours as you climbed back over to the other seat, but you instinctually knew better than to voice your complaints right now.

Paul leaned across the console, reaching his hand between your knees and under the seat to move it back as far as it would go. once he was satisfied with that, he reached across your lap and pulled the reclining handle, his other hand helping to lower the seat back slowly so you weren’t sent flying backward.

“scooch back” he ordered again, and you moved your hips backward on the seat, supporting yourself with your elbows on the very edge of the seat near the headrest.

you were confused as he opened the driver-side door and hopped out of the truck. you watched as he opened the passenger-side door, it becoming clear now what his plan was. you pulled your knees towards your chest as he climbed back in, kneeling on the floor mat in front of you. god damn, this truck was spacious, and you were incredibly grateful for that right now.

his large hands fumbled to unbutton your shorts. he pulled the zipper down and you lifted your hips, followed by your legs, so he could slide them off. not wanting to wait another second, he pulled your underwear to the side and connected his thumb to your clit. you let out a loud gasp at the sensation and he chuckled proudly, knowing how good he was making you feel. Paul rubbed small, tight circles on the sensitive nub for a few seconds before you felt a finger dip into your wet folds. a guttural moan escaped your throat as you finally got the sensation you had been waiting for since his hand had rested on your thigh earlier in the night.

he added a second finger shortly after and continued to pump in and out of your heat, his thumb continuing its circular motions on your clit. you could feel your orgasm building inside of your core, and it was almost euphoric knowing it was Paul making you feel like this.

“Paul, i’m gonna-” you moaned, getting close to the edge. “what the fuck?” he’d removed his fingers altogether upon hearing this and you were not happy about it. 

“patience, princess.” he chuckled, making eye contact with you once again as he raised his fingers to his mouth to taste you on them. you were still pissed at him for teasing you like that, but the sound he made as he licked your wetness off himself almost made it worth it. almost.

“let’s take these off, shall we? or should i rip them off?” his fingers slipped under the waistband of your underwear.

“don’t you dare,” the one rational brain cell you had left replied, lifting your hips for him to slide them off like he did the shorts. you liked this pair. Paul held your hips back down as he spread your legs open, leaning his torso over the seat until you could feel his breath between your legs, amplified by the wetness that had come with the teasing.

“god, you look so fucking good” he took a second to admire the sight before him before he groaned lustfully and connected his tongue to your cunt. he made quick work of finding all the right spots to hit, causing your legs to tremble and your eyes to roll back in your head. at this rate, you wouldn’t last long, but you never wanted this moment to end.

“oh, fuck,” you moaned as he continued to circle the sensitive nub with his tongue. you had never felt this connected to someone before, not any of your exes. no one had ever made you feel as good as Paul was in this moment. as he continued the motions of his tongue, you realized Paul was perfect for you in every way, including this one. it was like pre-nut clarity.

you felt the pressure building up again, somehow even stronger than last time, unable to contain your moans. “fuck, Paul, i’m gonna cum” you groaned, arching your back against the seat as Paul continued to hold your hips down harshly against it. you figured there would be bruises there tomorrow, and the thought of him marking you up even more only exacerbated your growing orgasm.

“cum for me, princess” Paul mumbled against your clit, giving you permission to let go. it only took a couple more swipes for you to come completely unglued against his mouth.

Paul gradually slowed down his motions, guiding you through your orgasm as your hips attempted to buck against his face, craving the stimulation. eventually, your brain started to function again, and the first thing you thought was that that was definitely the best orgasm you’d ever had. you couldn’t tell Paul that, though - it would boost his ego way too much, and he already had a huge one to begin with. the second thought that went through your head was that you were ready for Paul to be your boyfriend. no man could eat you out that good and get away from you.

he admired his work as you panted in front of him, a smirk of pride on his face. he loved knowing he was the one who made you feel so good. he raised himself up on his knees to hover over you, one arm resting on the seat to support himself as the other snaked behind your back to pull you to his chest. you wrapped your arms around his back, settling your face in the crook of his neck. your breaths were soon in time with each other, basking in the body heat radiating from the both of you.

you could have stayed like that forever, but after a few minutes, Paul pulled back slightly to look you in the eyes. he seemed deep in thought before he smiled and opened his mouth to ask you a simple question: “is it casual now?”

------

part 2 here :)

[writingoddess1125]

Hi, I love Morticia and Gomez Effect universe, and I have to say it. I'm the only one who thinks that if she ends up getting pregnant, it would be a girl. How would Mihawk be as a girl dad. Or, would they have twins or triplets?? They want an army, after all.😏😉

I like your thinking! MWHAHAHAHAHS

Morticia and Gomez Effect - pt. 3

Creating an Army

Mihawk x FemReader

Previous <<

Taking request on Ko-Fi

Check out my Go Fund Me

• It seemed all that really had to be done was speaking the wish for a child- In less then 2 months you found out you were pregnant. Much to the delight of Mihawk and yourself.

• Mihawk was very protective of you, essentially a helicopter. He needed to make sure you were safe and healthy, cooking all your meals, making sure Perona was as respectful as possible and didn't dare to cause a fuss while you were pregnant.

• Which she didn't in truth. Perona had been actually excited at the idea of a baby, flooding the place with more stuffed animals and 'cute' onsies.

• While for you, the pregnancy reminded you of the sea. At times calm and cool, while others it was like a raging storm in your body. You were fortunate that Mihawk was like a massive ship that could ride through the calms and battle thr storms, Rubbing your back when you puked- Whsipering sweet words when you cried and wiping away the discomfort that settled on your bones as the baby grew.

• It was a normal day, you were 6 months along in your pregnancy and Mihawk had gone out to train. Leaving you to the peace of your favorite fruit tea and some cakes.

• Delightful

• As you tucked into your new found treats you heard the door open and the sound of chattering. Knowing that it wasn't Mihawk you reached for the blade you kept tucked to your side under the large blanket you were under.

• Till you saw young familiar faces.

• The young Pirates, The Strawhats finally had return it seemed. With your necklace in tow as they looked like they had been through quite a journey and back. The scorch marks upon their clothes also being a amusing sight.

• Zoro stepped forward, bowing respectfully to his teacher. The other pirates also coming to greet you and hopefully stay in your good Graces.

• "Madam Dracule, We have your necklace" Zoro said with calm respect.

• He watched you stand and his eyes and the eyes of the young pirates all went to the same thing that had been obstructed by the thick blankets. Your rounded stomach-

• "Thank you Zoro, I do hope it was able to help in your journey" You say calmly as you take the necklace from him- Seeing how their faces went to that or horror and shock at the sight of your clearly pregnant stomach.

• The blonde one, with a weird eyebrow was the first to break "THATS NOT FAIR!? HE GETS A HOT WIFE AND GETS HER KNOCKED UP!?" He screamed in shock which surprised you before the rest of the crew decended on him like hounds to shut him up. Zoro still just standing there shocked till a random foot seemed to hit him and he joined the fight-

• Of course Mihawk hurt the commotion and quickly went to find you, coming to a sight he didn't know what to deal with first.

• There the strawhats were all fighting each other. The two women of the crew speaking to you calmly and touching your rounded stomach with your blessing as you held your ruby necklace and A passed out Reindeer at the foot of the fight..

• Deciding the fighting was the first thing be wad quick to knock out all the boys and toss them out his home. The reindeer he just stepped over since it was useless- he also make quick work to ask the women to leave which they did after giving polite goodbyes and congratulations.

• That leaving Mihawk to then scoop you up and bring you to bed. Having found that it was bedtime-

• Possessive as ever...

• In the coming months, the house was prepared for your birth. Mihawk having brought in a medical team for you- You assumed they were paid well but terrified.

• It had been after dinner, 3 weeks early when your water had broke. It seemed your child wanted to make their grand entrance early.

• It was like the world had stopped when you felt a rush of water down your legs when you went to stand to get some juice- Mihawk and you both just staring at the floor under you were the water was

• ....

• "..Hell" Mihawk muttered first, shooting back his wine in a effort to calm his nerves before rushing over to you and quickly escorting you to the labor room. Summoning the doctors quickly as well who got you prepped and ready.

• It was slow at first- But as the hours ticked by you the pain increased. Mihawk seated next to you as he tried to guild you through the waves of pain that wrecked your body.

• While labor is hard, He knows you are quite strong and will survive. You have to... You can't leave him

• "You alright darling?" He ask softly, holding your hand as you suffer with bringing in the next Dracule in the world.

• You give a weakened smile "It is painful- But it's a is not worth dying for" You say playfully, Earning a smile from Mihawk who kissed the back of your hand.

• The poor Doctors are uncomfortable by the whole situation. Especially with how calm you were during God Damn Labor!-

• It was near twilight of the next Morning did the labor finally come to an end. A shrill cry piercing the cold morning air as new life was brought in.

• "It's a Girl!" The Doctor said cheerfully as the crying child was liftwd and placed on your chest carefully and beginning to be cleaned with a towel.

• You and Mihawk seated next to each other staring wide eyed and in awe at the little girl screaming on your chest.

• "Looks like I had nothing to do with this at all" You mused, seeing how your little daughter looked so much like her father it was unfair. Even with her face pink from crying and her rounded face you could clearly see Mihawks genes had dominated yours.

• The thin layer of black hair onto her head also not helping. Mihawk chuckled as with a gentle hand he touched his daughters hair.

• "She is beautiful" He says softly, his own eyes getting misty as he stared at the little girl.

• Is actually quite pleased their first child is a girl and the only. It couldn't be better in his mind as he remembers his youth around the children that Gol D Roger would bring onto the ship. The boys were the most troubling.

• "She is.." You say softly, Watching as she settled down and yawned. Reaching out her little arms randomly, her little pudgy fingers wrapping around Mihawks finger. You practically saw the hearts in his eyes when she did this-

• In less then 4 minutes the baby girl has already stolen her father's heart and has him wrapped around his finger.

• "Dracule Marya" He whispered. Kissing your cheek as he smiled down at his daughter. You swore you saw tears in his eyes.

• Mihawk is a absolute girl Dad, Truthfully a good father overall. He enjoyed cleaning up after her, helping with feedings, choosing important items for her development.

• He does have one poor habit however-

• You stand there with your arms crossed under your bust as you raise and eyebrow at your husband. "Mihawk hand her over my love- She needs to learn to sleep in her crib" You explain.

• Marya was 4 months old and Mihawk had grown used to Marya sleeping in the bed between you two. So you had finally decided to put the smaller crib to use, pulling it into your twos shared bedroom so she could no longer sleep in the bed with you.

• But here she was-

• Your husband holding your half asleep daughter in his arm carefully while finishing some paperwork. This had been the 2nd time that night you had placed Marya in her crib to sleep on her own and everytime she cried in less then 10 minutes it would stop and you'd fine Mihawk holding her again in his study.

• "She was crying" He said calmly, setting down his pen to pat her back to comfort her.

• "That's the point Darling- She needs to learn to sleep in the crib" You stress, seeing Mihawk scowl at this and hold her closer to his chest.

• "She doesn't like it" He said stressing- This making you sighing at his dramatics.

• "Fine- But you'd have stay in the nursery with her since she can't sleep in our bed anymore" You said with a sigh.

• He slept in the nursery, on the floor next to the crib with his hand resting ontop of her- for 3 nights before you finally kicked him out and strong armed him to let her sleep in the crib in the bedroom.

• Besides Mihawks constant want to hold his daughter and carry her everywhere he was perfect. And in his eyes so was she-

• Mihawk sat there watching you, feeding little Marya and cooing softly at her as she watched the world around her, her eyes matched yours the only thing that you seemed to give to the little girl since she was such a clone of her Daddy.

• "Darling" Mihawk called to you waving you over, making you look up from your task at hand. Marya pulling from your breast full from her meal.

• Walking over Mihawk gently took Marya from you, beginning to burp her as you pulled your shirt back to place. He smiled as his yellow eyes gleamed

• "What is going through your head my Love?" You question. Knowing that look all to well. Mihawk shrugging slightly to keep from shifting Marya too much.

• "We should have another-"

Tag List- {Sorry I forgot to put it!}

@who-the-hockeysticks @vexladin @iraaiitz

@stellasloth @yuriwk

[tragedy-of-commons]

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boothill x gn!reader | wc: ~1.4k

Always get your hopes up.

tags/warnings: alcohol mentions and references (reader actually doesn't drink explicitly), romantic tension, ipc cog reader, mental gymnastics, pining in a weird constipated way

notes: this is a request from a lovely ao3 commenter, aqua! "...i'd like to request a Boothill x IPC reader if that's fine?" + i also combined this with a dialogue prompt from @/promptlyprompting!

“You’d be a fool to say no.”

Boothill’s voice remains a coarse drawl that almost sounds scolding. Even if your way of running the show has always been at odds with his, he’s never outright called you a fool of all things. His offer hangs in the air, making the sticky atmosphere of the bar even more unbearable. The bulbous red light fixtures sway overhead as the ringleader of a nearby group slams an animated fist on the counter, licks of crimson fleetingly painting the tops of your heads.

You laugh, drink going untouched as it always does; at the end of the night, when you both fight over the tab, you always surrender yours over to him as a peace offering. Maybe tonight you’ll need to give more than that to appease him. “I’d be a bigger fool to listen to you. You aren’t exactly known for being the most reasonable of the bunch.”

“I don’t extend this opportunity to just anyone,” he reminds you, lips curling into a toothy grin. “To me, it seems like you’re looking for excuses to miss out like you always do. That mind of yours ain’t too rigid for Galaxy Ranger business, y’know. I bet you’d make it work.”

Boothill is weird, that much is apparent, yes, but only he would ask you to join him on his journey, call you a fool, and then compliment your mindset all in the same artificial breath. His audacity is so offensive that it’s a wonder that Lan themself hasn’t struck him down. He gets away with so much - including making you hope for a different future. Including making you hope for a different future with him.

The exterior of the bar is just as cramped and loud as the interior. Visitors modding their vehicles on the outcrop of the main strip—Mechanic’s Haven—shout and drill away at the innards of spaceships, drones, satellites, and whatever else - wayward sparks landing at the feet of shoppers and pedestrians. There’s something to be said about an IPC lackey and a Galaxy Ranger walking into a bar, but he wisely refrains. 

You sigh. “You know I can’t. As fun as chasing pipe dreams with you would be, I’m locked into a contract with the largest corporation in the whole known universe,” you make a point of gesturing to your uniform. “That kind of obligation doesn’t just go away, even if you run from it.”

He snorts, an empathetic little thing. Boothill then pops his hat off and situates it on your head, much to your chagrin. The noise you let out is affronted, the brim of the relic obscuring the better part of your vision. How disgustingly fond of him. “I see where you’re comin’ from, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t ask you to reconsider. You’d be a much better fit here than there.”

(The unspoken words stick to the roof your mouth. You’d be a much better fit with me than with them.)

Part of you agrees. There’s always been a scale in your head that weighs the fairness of each step you take - measuring the footfalls of others in tandem with yours; you know what it is like to have a strong sense of justice that itches to be upheld. Boothill witnessed this side of you firsthand, when the first words you ever spoke to him were something along the lines of: “Leave the freelancers here alone. Those are the prices, and they’re that steep for a reason. Pay him in full or I’ll make sure you’re in need of a few more repairs.”

You’re also aware of the strange role you play in this. Being on the IPC’s payroll, the contractual thing to do was to report the outlaw to your superiors immediately and enjoy the generous bounty on his head, but you didn’t. You didn’t because when you came face to face with the Boothill, you were ambushed with a childlike wonder you hadn’t felt in years, even if your righteous admonishment didn’t reflect it.

Nowadays, this dingy old bar with no name isn’t the same without his wild tales. Mechanic’s Haven isn’t the same without him at your side as you weave through the clusters of people, him poking fun at your job and your unwillingness to turn him in. When he calls you one of the good ones, you begrudgingly call him a pretty stand-up guy. He gets a kick out of that.

This planetary pitstop is growing more suffocating by the minute. You tip the hat upward to let it sit on your head at a higher angle so you can actually see, narrowed eyes trained on your companion. “You think so? And what makes you so sure, huh?”

He makes a show of flexing his fingers before balling the scrapwork appendages into a fist, taking great care in placing it over where his heart would be, if he was not the thing he is now. The look he fixes you with is complicated, layers of something hidden behind that thick accent and the centers of those crosshairs. “Call it a gut feeling. Y’know, as arbitrary,” he enunciates the word painstakingly, “as the universe is, there’s a reason we met. You got what it takes… and I ain’t afraid to shy away from that truth like you are.”

There it is again. “I’m not afraid. I just happen to think before I act.”

Boothill sighs and swipes your drink that’s been collecting dust with a deft hand, knocking it back. He recovers, gaze raking over your form. It isn’t salacious in the slightest, you think, the way he starts at the tip of his hat’s feather to the silver insignia resting over your heart. Maybe his eyes lingered on your lips too, but that could be you injecting something pointless like hope into this relationship that doesn’t need to be there. That seems more likely. 

“A little too much if I do say so myself,” he guffaws, much to the displeasure of the other patrons. He plucks his hat back off your head with something like amusement, returning it to its rightful place. “You’re as stubborn as a mule, but I know when I’ve been bested. Come on, it’s gettin’ late.”

You two don’t fight over the tab this time around, him sliding a generous amount of credit to the barkeep who just looks slightly bewildered at two of his regulars not verbally fistfighting each other like they normally do. The question in his stare makes your cheeks feel hotter than lava, and you walk with Boothill out of the bar without much fuss, greeting the mild night cold. The silence that you share isn’t uncomfortable, but there’s more to be said. You know he wants nothing more than to hear a yes from you, which sends your mental equilibrium into dizzying contention.

Something is not right, and it is your fault.

With an audible swallow, you fight the butterflies in your stomach and nudge his side. The raucous song of Mechanic’s Haven harmonizes with the thrumming in your ears. “Hey.”

He turns to look at you, whistling a tune you can’t place.

“I’ll give it some more thought. Don’t get your hopes up, because becoming a fugitive by association seems like a lot more trouble than it’s worth,” you cough.

Boothill beams and it just serves to confuse your internal scale even more. One would think you’re suddenly inorganic with how it feels like you’re short-circuiting. Is this an acute onset of cardiac arrest? Or is it something else you’ve been pushing away for months on end?

He nudges you back. “I knew you’d come around! And the first lesson of being a Galaxy Ranger,” he starts, “is to always get your hopes up.”

Yeah… it’s definitely something else entirely. Something that, in all likelihood, is going to get you into massive trouble. You understand the risks that come with fraternizing with an outlaw, have weighed them heavily against your heart, and have reached only one verdict:

You’ll sleep on it.

(You’ll end up following this cowboy no matter what. Even you, deep down, know that he’s been sticking around the area for way too long, like he’s waiting for something or someone. It just so happened to be you. Dang it all to heck and back.)

taglist: @flower-yi, @moineauz, @aphrodict, @nomazee, @singularity-sam, @harque, @thestarswhisper

[alotofpockets]

Babies & aunties | Mary Earps x Pregnant!Reader

Where you're pregnant with twins, and Alessia and Ella are overjoyed to become aunts

A/n: thank you @woso-soso & @wosoamazing for your ideas on this one!

Woso masterlist | Words: 1k

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Your wife always dealt with pressure well, in her line of work there really was no other way to go. Penalty shoot outs, game-saving dives, and fighting for the trophies. The news of becoming a mother was on a whole different level, no trophy could ever beat that. 

The two of you had been trying for a baby for a couple months before you had gotten the good news. You had been over the moon that it had worked so soon, and that you were on the journey to motherhood with the love of your life.

You kept the news to yourselves for a bit, wanting to share the moment with each other first. Mary had been absolutely amazing, she was there for you during your morning sickness, food cravings, high emotions, and tiredness. You could not have asked for a better partner through the first trimester of your pregnancy. 

After your ultrasound, you had planned to start telling people. Never did you expect that you would be the ones surprised at the ultrasound. The doctor said it was clear as day, you were pregnant with twins. 

When you got back home from the doctor’s office the two of you sat in the nursery room revising all the ideas you had to make the room work for two babies, while you were both overjoyed that two little babies would be joining your family.

With the ultrasound showing the two little beans, a name you started fondly calling the babies ,it was time to tell your family and friends. Everyone was so happy for the both of you, knowing how badly you wanted to start a family together. Nothing beat the enthusiasm of Mary’s United and England teammates Alessia and Ella. The pair was over the moon with the news and could not wait to be aunties to the babies. 

The next few weeks you were getting stuff together for the little beans their nursery. Which consisted of you telling Mary what you wanted, and her getting and assembling it. Mary did it all happily while you lovingly watched her from the rocking chair that she has also assembled.

You wanted the gender of the babies to be a surprise for the both of you until the gender reveal party. So, at your next check up, you asked the doctor’s to put the results in an envelope. Mary’s mother was the one getting everything ready for the gender reveal party, so she was the only one that knew the genders of the babies.

Julie worked out your ideas to perfection. In the middle of your backyard stood a small football goal decorated with pink and blue tassels, along with a “pink vs blue” banner. Tables were filled with fun games to guess the genders, and names of the babies, and lots of pink and blue coloured food.

“Alright, everybody gather around!” Mary announced as you were getting ready for the actual gender reveal part of the gender reveal party. Your friends and family surrounded you as you stood in front of the football goal in the yard. 

“Thank you all for coming and showing so much love for these little beans already. We truly appreciate each and everyone of you coming out here today.” You say while looking out at the people who filled your backyard.

“Who’s ready to find out what we’re having?” Everyone cheered. “So are we! We have two mini footballs, one for each baby, pink for a girl and blue for a boy.” Mary looked over to you. “Are you ready, darling?” You nod and smile. Mary kisses your cheek before she turns to the rest of the people again. “Can we get a countdown from five?”

“Five, four, three, two, one!” Everyone counted down loudly. On one you both let go of the footballs and kicked them towards the crowd. Both balls exploded in pink powder. Mary looks at you with a face of excitement. “We’re having two girls!” You hug her tight with a face of joy. 

When Ella and Alessia run up and start jumping around with Mary to celebrate the news you step aside and let them have their moment. You watched them huddle and jump around while standing with your friends. It was the perfect moment.

----- maryearps and y/n_y/l/n just posted

maryearps: Today we found out what we're having! Two baby girls💗

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The rest of your pregnancy went smoothly. You had everything ready for the little beans, and were very impatiently waiting for the moment you could hold them in your arms. 

Ella and Alessia were over all the time, they loved talking to the little beans and had even started a new instagram account called Tooney Russo and the Beans, where they were posting everything related to the beans arrival and were planning to post babies and auntie pictures in the future. You thought it was absolutely adorable. They were almost as excited for the babies to be here, as you and Mary were.

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tooney_russo_and_the_beans just posted to their story

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Then the moment was finally there, you got to hold your little beans for the first time. They were absolutely perfect. Their little fingers and toes, tiny noses, squishy cheeks. You were over the moon, you never thought you could fall in love so quickly. Of course you had loved them from the moment you knew you were pregnant, but holding them like this gave a whole new meaning to the word.

Mary was with you the whole time, and the two of you just could not keep your eyes off your little baby girls. The rest of the afternoon you spend in the hospital room as a family of four, with the occasional family and friends visit, to meet the little beans.

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y/n_y/l/n and maryearps just posted

y/n_y/l/n: Our little beans. Currently feeling like the luckiest mama

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💗 If you enjoyed this fic, please consider liking, commenting, and reblogging! You can also supporting me by leaving a tip 💗

[praisetheaxolotl]

The Arsonist Theory, Part 3: Journey to the Vicious Spiral Nebula

Part 1: Mandibles!

Part 2: We Get It, The Billboard Was A Metaphor

I want to take a step back for a moment. Look at the bigger picture of Gravity Falls as a whole, and at the relationship between narrative foils that are the protagonists and antagonists of a story.

But first, just a recap: For anyone new, the Arsonist Theory proposes that Bill was not the sole person responsible for the destruction of his home dimension-- there was a third party, an accomplice that used him like he uses others now.

Once again:

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE BOOK OF BILL, INCLUDING SOLUTIONS TO CIPHERS

On we go!

Gravity Falls is, at its core, a story about cycles.

More specifically, it's a story about the vicious cycles that enable bad behavior- both personal spirals, and cyclical patterns of behavior in families.

We see this most obviously with the Stan twins, with both personal and familial cycles. In the personal side of things, Stan broke Ford's perpetual motion machine, resulting in his parents disowning him and Stan vowing that they were wrong and they'd see that one day, only for every attempt to prove them wrong about him to backfire and get him into even worse trouble, each failure further cementing his reputation more and more as a lying, dishonest criminal-- hey, where have I heard this one before?

On Ford's side, he erroneously trusted Bill and was consumed by both the portal and, once he realized he'd made it, his mistake itself. Even after Bill's death, he's terrified of him-- the mistake consumes him, eats him up inside. However, every time he attempts to subdue Bill on his own without confiding in his family the full story for fear of their judgement, it all ends up making everything worse. The incident with the portal and Stan? It was because he refused to tell Stan what exactly was going on, deciding to keep it all to himself out of guilt and lash out instead of admitting that he'd trusted the wrong person and that he was in grave danger-- hey, I might have heard this one before, too!

On the familial side of things, the Pines twins' parents don't exactly have the best relationship, as revealed in the Book Of Bill.

That fight must have been pretty bad to give Dipper, a kid who's survived the APOCALYPSE, nightmares. The Pines family has been shaped by familial dysfunction, and now it's been passed on-- the Stan twins' parents weren't exactly the healthiest parents, especially Filbrick. It's plain to see that that dysfunction was passed down from generation to generation, until it hit the Pines twins' parents as well.

And hell, Dipper and Mabel almost being broken apart as well-- not only because of Ford offering Dipper an apprenticeship without considering Mabel, mirroring how he sees Stan as dead weight, but also because of their parents fighting. Mabel didn't want to go home to that environment alone, and Dipper wanted to be far, far away from it. The Stan twins were broken apart by their father, and now the Pines twins will be broken apart by the Stans.

Except... that's not what happened, was it?

The Pines twins didn't let this break them apart. Dipper ended up prioritizing his sister and caring about her and her feelings, without just writing her off as deadweight the way Ford did to Stan. And eventually, the Stan twins also reconciled. They broke the cycle, as protagonists in a story with a happy ending tend to do.

Bill, as their antagonistic foil, would therefore be perpetuating cycles like this, instead of breaking them.

Then it stands to reason that, from a Doylist perspective, wouldn't it make sense for Bill to have been a victim of the same kind of manipulation and deceit that he now inflicts onto others?

In fact, we already have an example of Bill being hurt by someone, then going on to pass that same pain onto someone else:

Even though this is a silly example, we've been given canonical evidence that the way Bill deals with trauma is to take it out on someone else. And let's be real, Gravity Falls is rife with examples of something seemingly silly at first but ending up to hold emotional weight for the characters involved. Take in point Stan's attachment to Wax Stan.

So, we've established the cycles present in Gravity Falls and Bill's thematic role as the antagonist leading to him perpetuating instead of breaking cycles. So, what does that mean for this theory?

Bill and Ford are already presented as foils to each other- they're both outcast individuals with both a strange personality and a mutation that make them unpalatable to others, with a sordid home life, who eventually make a huge supernatural mistake with apocalyptic consequences. So, it's natural to wonder: what if their parallels extend even beyond this?

Ford initially blamed himself for being foolish enough to fall for Bill's tricks, placing the blame largely on himself. However, his family was there for him to pull him out of that way of thinking and help him move past it. Bill, in contrast, didn't have a family, ergo he had no one to pull him out of a similar rut. And we see multiple times throughout the Book of Bill and the Axolotl's poem that he does regret what happened to Euclidia, and his role in causing the massacre, so it's not out of the question to think that maybe, his thinking followed a line similar to Ford's. That there was someone that took advantage of Bill's desire to make everyone understand, and Bill blamed himself both for falling for it and for being ineffectual in stopping it.

Ford was at a standstill and approached by Bill, who was a genuine friend in a lifetime of loneliness and who presented himself as a friend, only to be used by him to create a portal that Bill was going to use for destruction-- perhaps Bill went through the same sequence, as victim instead of perpetrator?

Did you know that most perpetrators of abuse are themselves victims of abuse? They grow up without healing from their past traumas, and end up inflicting it onto others, thus continuing the cycle.

(Here's a fun fact- that's actually what my first theory ever was about, before this blog!)

Anyway, to me it's becoming clearer and clearer-- there's a glaringly obvious thematic parallel here that very neatly supports the idea of someone having used Bill in this manner in the past.

Oh, and by the way- on Time Baby's report on Bill, a translated cipher refers to him as the "Lone survivor of the Euclidian Massacre"

Lone survivor? If he'd acted alone, wouldn't it say "perpetrator?" If Time Baby knew enough to know what dimension he was a survivor of despite Bill himself never even speaking its name, then he should know enough to know the story of what happened. There's always the possibility that he didn't, but I saw fit to mention it.

In part four, everything is gonna be tied together as neatly as I can, with some present-day clues from Bill's actions that point to certain parts of his trauma being linked together that, on their own, seem a bit... reach-y, but with three posts of evidence backing them, they hold more water than that.

Part 4: Blame The Arson, Not The Fire

[tkwrites]

Snapshots Masterlist

Quinn Hughes x ofc

Are Quinn Hughes and Sarah Roberts fated to be together? It seems like it. Follow their journey from a spur of the moment first date to falling in love and all the good and bad in between.

These snapshots are written in whatever order strikes my fancy, but there is a loose timeline they fall into. I've listed them in both posting and timeline order. There are some timeline inconsistencies that will be edited as needed. In the meantime, let's just agree to pretend they don't exist. Also, the season the Canucks are playing in is obviously fictional and doesn't follow any actual season.

• Please be aware, this series deals with a lot of grief.

The Snapshots playlist can be found here.

Other work can be found on my Fanfiction Masterlist.

*indecates smut

In Posting Order:

Shoot The Moon* The snapshot that started it all - Quinn comes home exhausted from a rough road trip. After a good night's sleep, he decides to try out some new things with Sarah. 

Love, Even in the Hard Parts When his mom can't make it to take Quinn to surgery, Sarah steps in in spite of her hatred of hospitals. 

Love Me Gently* Early on in their relationship, Quinn and Sarah have their first really sexual encounter, and learn about each other along the way. 

Our Heroes Meet: When Quinn and Sarah meet, they’re pulled into each other's lives in a way neither one expected. 

The Second Time is Better* Sequel to Love Me Gently, Quinn and Sarah have sex for the first time. After a disappointing first performance, they're in for an experience much deeper than either one expected. 

Worth the Wait: It takes more than a week, but Quinn and Sarah finally go on a date.  

Messages* Missing him something fierce, Sarah sends Quinn a video of herself in his bed. 

Second Nature: Sequel to Worth the Wait, Quinn and Sarah have their second date. Getting to know each other in many ways is like second nature.

First Fight: Quinn and Sarah have their first fight - we learn more about Quinn’s previous relationship

Better: Sequel to First Fight, Sarah meets Brady and Emma and is thrown into the world of hockey outside the rink. Jack and Luke hear about their relationship in a less than favorable way. 

Before I meet your parents...* As Sarah prepares to meet Quinn’s parents, she’s bombarded with new feelings and situations, as well as trying to manage her own life. A very worried Quinn helps her get to the bottom of it and does everything he can to make it better. 

Private Lessons: As requested by @eyesthatroll, Quinn teaches Sarah to skate.

I miss you.* After their longest separation of the summer, Quinn and Sarah reunite.

I miss you. - Bonus Scene* A short continuation of I miss you. Quinn and Sarah make soft, sleepy love as they doze off for the night.

Sarah Meets the Parents: As Requested, Sarah meets Ellen and Jim.

I can't believe you're here.* After a very long time apart due to bad timing, Sarah surprises Quinn on the road. Wearing his jersey, she fulfills one of his long harbored fantasies. The night just gets better when he sees what she has on underneath. 

Happy Birthday, Sarah: Quinn is gone over Sarah’s Birthday. 

Let the Cleaners Deal With It: When Quinn wakes to Sarah frantically cleaning after unexpectedly getting her period, he insists she let the cleaners deal with it.

I'll Be Proud For You: When an opportunity for Quinn to meet her uncle arrives, Sarah jumps at the chance and they attend a St. Patrick's Day party at her uncle's house on Salt Spring Island. On the ferry ride back home, Sarah finally explains why she had to be close to family after her mothers death, necessitating her move to Vancouver. 

Elimination* When the Canucks are eliminated from the Stanley Cup Playoffs, Sarah offers Quinn a kind of comfort he didn’t know he needed. 

Good For You* Quinn and Sarah have a discussion about and decide to stop using condoms before putting that decision into practice. A question we’ve all been waiting for is finally asked.

Please* After they finally move in together, Sarah follows through with Quinn's request for her to edge him.

Harrison Butker Drama: A blurb about Sarah and Quinn reacting to the Harrison Butker Drama.

Summer Decisions: An invitation to his family reunion over the fourth of July has Quinn and Sarah tumbling into a long conversation about their future in the off-season and beyond. Though the ensuing fight is resolved, the reality of their commitments vs. their love for each other is put to the test.

He's Got It Bad: When Sarah meets the team at Conor's birthday party, not only does she get to know Quinns teammates and their partners, she enters a world she never expected. At practice the next day, the guys congratulate and tease Quinn mercilessly.

Understanding (or the one in which Jack Hughes is forced to get over himself): Still upset about finding out about her from Brady, Jack has some hesitations when he and Luke come to town for the Finals. Can he get over himself enough to see what Quinn and Sarah has is real?

Congratulations* Sarah congratulates Quinn on clinching into the playoffs

The Invitation: Jack extends Sarah an olive branch

Can I Watch?* The day after I miss you: When Quinn discovers a vibrator in Sarah’s toiletry bag, it sets them on a course of discovery and pleasure neither of them planned on. After a wild afternoon, they discuss their fantasies.

Shaving: A blurb of Sarah reacting to Quinn shaving his playoff beard.

Can I Come See You? After a rough game, Quinn seeks out comfort from Sarah. 

5 Days of Joy* Sarah joins Quinn at his family reunion. There’s laughter and tears and some spicy time as they sneak time alone. Sarah bonds with Jim over the loss of their mothers and explains why her dad loved Costco so much. She and Ellen bond over their partners being gone for stretches of time. A black bikini has Quinn practically drooling. The whole family goes on a beach adventure with Sarah in the lead. More than anything else, Quinn and Sarah fall more and more in love. 

Fantasy* A short blurb (500 words) about Quinn fulfilling a fantasy with Sarah's help.

Happy Birthday, Quinn: In an effort to get Quinn something he can’t get for himself, and with her friends’ encouragement, Sarah does something she never imagined she’d do before. When they finally celebrate his birthday together, Quinn opens several gifts he never expected. 

Happy Halloween! Quinn and Sarah plan for and attend the Canucks team Halloween Party.

A Surprisingly Fortuitous Bus Ride* Due to circumstances outside of his control, Quinn finds himself late to a FaceTime date with Sarah. When she starts some fun by herself, Quinn can’t help but join in, even if he can’t see her. 

In Timeline Order:

Our Heroes Meet: When Quinn and Sarah meet, they’re pulled into each other's lives in a way neither one expected. 

Worth the Wait: It takes more than a week, but Quinn and Sarah finally go on a date.  

Second Nature: Sequel to Worth the Wait, Quinn and Sarah have their second date. Getting to know each other in many ways is like second nature.

Can I Come See You? After a rough game, Quinn seeks out comfort from Sarah. 

Love Me Gently* Early on in their relationship, Quinn and Sarah have their first really sexual encounter, and learn about each other along the way. 

The Second Time is Better* Sequel to Love Me Gently, Quinn and Sarah have sex for the first time. After a disappointing first performance, they're in for an experience much deeper than either one expected. 

First Fight: Quinn and Sarah have their first fight - we learn more about Quinn’s previous relationship

Better: Sequel to First Fight, Sarah meets Brady and Emma and is thrown into the world of hockey outside the rink. Jack and Luke hear about their relationship in a less than favorable way. 

He's Got It Bad: When Sarah meets the team at Conor's birthday party, not only does she get to know Quinns teammates and their partners, she enters a world she never expected. At practice the next day, the guys congratulate and tease Quinn mercilessly.

I'll Be Proud For You: When an opportunity for Quinn to meet her uncle arrives, Sarah jumps at the chance and they attend a St. Patrick's Day party at her uncle's house on Salt Spring Island. On the ferry ride back home, Sarah finally explains why she had to be close to family after her mothers death, necessitating her move to Vancouver. 

Messages* Missing him something fierce, Sarah sends Quinn a video of herself in his bed. 

Before I meet your parents...* As Sarah prepares to meet Quinn’s parents, she’s bombarded with new feelings and situations, as well as trying to manage her own life. A very worried Quinn helps her get to the bottom of it and does everything he can to make it better. 

Sarah Meets the Parents: As Requested, Sarah meets Ellen and Jim.

Congratulations* Sarah congratulates Quinn on clinching into the playoffs.

Happy Birthday, Sarah: Quinn is gone over Sarah’s Birthday. 

Good For You* Quinn and Sarah have a discussion about and decide to stop using condoms before putting that decision into practice. A question we’ve all been waiting for is finally asked.

Private Lessons: As requested by @eyesthatroll, Quinn teaches Sarah to skate.

Shoot The Moon* The snapshot that started it all - Quinn comes home exhausted from a rough road trip. After a good night's sleep, he decides to try out some new things with Sarah. 

Summer Decisions: An invitation to his family reunion over the fourth of July has Quinn and Sarah tumbling into a long conversation about their future in the off-season and beyond. Though the ensuing fight is resolved, the reality of their commitments vs. their love for each other is put to the test.

Let the Cleaners Deal With It: When Quinn wakes to Sarah frantically cleaning after unexpectedly getting her period, he insists she let the cleaners deal with it.

Harrison Butker Drama: A blurb about Sarah and Quinn reacting to the Harrison Butker Drama.

Understanding (or the one in which Jack Hughes is forced to get over himself): Still upset about finding out about her from Brady, Jack has some hesitations when he and Luke come to town for the Finals. Can he get over himself enough to see what Quinn and Sarah has is real?

Elimination* When the Canucks are eliminated from the Stanley Cup Playoffs, Sarah offers Quinn a kind of comfort he didn’t know he needed. 

Shaving: A blurb of Sarah reacting to Quinn shaving his playoff beard.

Love, Even in the Hard Parts When his mom can't make it to take Quinn to surgery, Sarah steps in in spite of her hatred of hospitals. 

The Invitation: Jack extends Sarah an olive branch

5 Days of Joy* Sarah joins Quinn at his family reunion. There’s laughter and tears and some spicy time as they sneak time alone. Sarah bonds with Jim over the loss of their mothers and explains why her dad loved Costco so much. She and Ellen bond over their partners being gone for stretches of time. A black bikini has Quinn practically drooling. The whole family goes on a beach adventure with Sarah in the lead. More than anything else, Quinn and Sarah fall more and more in love. 

I miss you.* After their longest separation of the summer, Quinn and Sarah reunite.

I miss you. - Bonus Scene* A short continuation of I miss you. Quinn and Sarah make soft, sleepy love as they doze off for the night.

Can I Watch?* The day after I miss you: When Quinn discovers a vibrator in Sarah’s toiletry bag, it sets them on a course of discovery and pleasure neither of them planned on. After a wild afternoon, they discuss their fantasies.

Fantasy* A short blurb (500 words) about Quinn fulfilling a fantasy with Sarah's help.

Please* After they finally move in together, Sarah follows through with Quinn's request for her to edge him.

Happy Birthday, Quinn: In an effort to get Quinn something he can’t get for himself, and with her friends’ encouragement, Sarah does something she never imagined she’d do before. When they finally celebrate his birthday together, Quinn opens several gifts he never expected. 

Happy Halloween! Quinn and Sarah plan for and attend the Canucks team Halloween Party.

I can't believe you're here.* After a very long time apart due to bad timing, Sarah surprises Quinn on the road. Wearing his jersey, she fulfills one of his long harbored fantasies. The night just gets better when he sees what she has on underneath. 

A Surprisingly Fortuitous Bus Ride* Due to circumstances outside of his control, Quinn finds himself late to a FaceTime date with Sarah. When she starts some fun by herself, Quinn can’t help but join in, even if he can’t see her. 

[seaofwine]

What do you like about the Odyssey? Besides some entertaining episodes (e.g. Circe or Calypso), I've never really been able to get into the Odyssey as a whole (I find the first 5 books especially dull). The Iliad really speaks to me more.

It's hard to really pinpoint what I like most about it but I love to talk about the Odyssey so I hope you like long posts hahaha

The first five books act as the exposition. When the Iliad ends, there's a general understanding that most of the surviving characters made it home. Menelaus and Helen have reunited, the catalyst for the Trojan War has been resolved. Agamemnon traversed the sea and made it back, and although he was killed by his wife Clytemnestra, there is no question about where he is; unlike Odysseus.

Telemachus has spent his entire youth without a father. When he finally decides to set out from Ithaca to find any leads on where Odysseus is, he is confronted with the fact that most everyone else has been accounted for. He sees Menelaus and Helen, the order of their kingdom, the comfort they have in each other and the bonds they have restored. Telemachus has known nothing but uncertainty, while his mother is forced to weave lies and deceptions to keep the suitors that plague their home at bay. The first five books really show how important one man can be when he is utterly lost, and what it would mean for everyone who loves him should he be found. These books also show the close interest that Athena, as patron of Odysseus, takes in his family. She steps into the chaos of Ithaca and gives Telemachus the inspiration to embark on his own journey, chasing the ghost of his still-living father.

When we finally reach Odysseus, he is not the same man that those who knew him in Troy described. They are the closest Telemachus can come to knowing what came of his father, but even they are separated by nearly a decade and the breadth of the sea. Penelope hasn't laid eyes on her husband in twenty years, there is no overestimating what that can do to a person's memory. Odysseus's first action is to cry. When finally Calypso is forced to allow Odysseus to leave, by order of Hermes, he makes his own raft and leaves at the first possible moment. He is fighting against the will of Poseidon, against the wrath he incurred, all alone. He has lost every single one of his men, every single person who could ever vouch for his identity, in a world where no one could recognize him, is gone. Despite this, he is still fighting to get back to Ithaca.

Odysseus is so utterly human in the text. When he is hosted by Alcinous, Odysseus asks the singer there to recount the story of the Trojan Horse. It's like landing at the doorstep of a stranger who graciously allows you to stay and immediately asking his DJ to play *your own* greatest hits - which in turn only upsets him. This also sets up the dramatic reveal of his identity (I like to imagine him looking around like, you guys remember this one? Yeah that's Me, I pinkie promise. Please give me 4000 drachmae and your best oarsmen (: ).

He recounts the story of how he got so utterly lost on the way back and one thing the Odyssey will tell you, to your face over and over again, is that Odysseus is a big time liar. But for some reason, his tale is so compelling it's hard to remind yourself of that when hearing it for the first time. Some points are so beyond baffling (like striking Polyphemus in the singular eye the poor sod has, and then once to the safety of his boat (which is on open water, the domain of said cyclops's father) loudly announcing his full gods-given name and mailing address, just in case anyone missed who it was) that it's like, yeah that was probably exactly what he did. This is the section of the story where we see Odysseus as he sees himself. This is his own reflection of the actions he made and the troubles that befell him because of it.

Odysseus is such a complex character that one of the epithets he is given is "polytropos", the many-faced or many-sided. Odysseus and his relationship to his own identity, which he can shed and don at any point that's convenient for him, is one of the main reasons I am obsessed with his story. This, and the exploration in an ancient text about what a close relationship with a deity, is something I am constantly thinking about.

[vianbarnes]

my buddie going canon ideal scenario and why it could happen before eddie fully realises he’s gay

i’ve been cooking up this scenario for a while now but before going into it i wanna clarify that i don’t think eddie’s homosexuality is tied to buck and just that. i could write a full essay about eddie’s queerness without even mentioning buck. HOWEVER i do think buck could be the key to eddie’s discovery, the last puzzle piece that makes it all make sense.

narratively speaking, i think it could be interesting to see buck and eddie get to the same conclusion (that they’re in love with each other) but in the complete opposite way. while for buck it’s oh shit i’m bi > oh shit i’m in love with eddie, for eddie it would be oh shit i’m in love with buck > oh shit i’m gay. and obviously eddie is starting his own journey just now, so he might realise he’s gay and then it could click for him that all he’s been looking for was there all along, but i do think that - since this is a tv show - it would be interesting to offer a different side of the story to the audience. and yes i know that buck’s queerness and eddie’s queerness are very different already, but i’m specifically referring to their storylines leading up to buddie. (also this is just a personal side note but i think i would be lowkey crazy to have both of them realise they’re queer and still not understand their feelings for each other, like i know they’re dumb and dumber but c’mon!!!)

ok so now let’s put on the tinfoil hat

we literally know nothing about what’s gonna happen in the next episodes so i don’t have any solid theory on how we could get to this scenario. some of the interviews were teasing some potential tension (or angst even) between buck and eddie so my brain took this information and ran with it. a lot of us were also theorising a nde for buck, for eddie or for both of them at the same time and that could also be the setup for what i’m thinking.

but first let’s analyse where buck and eddie are right now (and in the upcoming episodes)

buck was just broken up with so now he’s trying to explore his sexuality and understand it more. it feels like the search for “his last” has just started and he’s excited to look at relationships and love through a new lens, but he also might feel a little discouraged that he has to do it all over again. he might be thinking “now that i have all these new possibilities, why is it still so hard to find my person?” (average bisexual experience i will tell you that much).

eddie on the other hand is slowly trying to forgive himself and love himself, accepting joy and not pushing away his desires and needs. allowing himself to feel certain feelings and just let go. he’s taking small steps to show up for himself just like he does for his loved ones every day (we still don’t know how far they’re gonna go with his story so the next episodes are definitely gonna be interesting)

so, with all that being said, here’s how buddie could go canon:

it’s late and buck shows up at eddie’s house. they’re in the kitchen drinking a beer, both leaning on the counter and not looking at each other at first. something has happened between them that they need to clear up (could be an argument, a fight or some very important words exchanged when they thought they were about to lose the other).

as much as i love a “because i love you!!” screamed during an argument, i don’t see that happening in this scenario. i imagine them having the softest, most honest and open conversation where they lay it all out - without even realising what they’re doing. at some point, buck is gonna say something that will make it finally click for eddie. if it’s an argument he could say something like “i need you in my life”/“i want you in my life forever”, or if this happens after a nde he could say “i can’t imagine my life without you”/“i don’t know how i could live without you” (i’m not a writer but you get the gist lol)

and that’s when eddie finally allows himself to feel what deep down he’s been feeling for years, and so he leans over and kisses buck. the kiss is pretty short: eddie pulls away almost immediately, as if his body was possessed by something and he just snapped out of it. buck can’t believe what just happened, but it takes him just a few seconds to realise and to grab eddie’s face and kiss him back. they start making out, they go out of frame, the screen turns black, the episode is over.

now let’s talk about the aftermath of the kiss. because if we know 911 we know that this goddamn show can’t let people just be happy so of course there’s gonna be some angst and miscommunication.

after the kiss, they don’t really talk about it. they might even get interrupted by something else (maybe eddie has to go to texas to get chris back?) so they have to postpone the what the fuck just happened conversation. and that’s when both of them start to spiral, but for different reasons. buck of course thinks that eddie’s distance means that he regretted the kiss, that they got caught up in the moment but that he doesn’t feel that way about him and he basically ruined their friendship. eddie is also freaking the fuck out: he’s panicking about how they could make their relationship work, how they could tell christopher, he’s questioning literally his whole life and past relationships like oh my god have i been gay this whole fucking time??, he’s worried about their jobs, how they’re gonna tell bobby and the others. basically questioning everything but buck.

being the idiots that they are, they’re gonna convince themselves that the other regretted everything and they’re gonna avoid each other and never have that much needed conversation. the 118 obviously notices that something is off, but no one knows what it is. until hen and eddie finally talk and he tells her everything: what happened, what made him panic and doubt everything and what’s stopping him from talking to buck. hen is shocked but not necessarily surprised. her and karen look at eachother (yes karen is there too because of eddiekaren bestfriendism that is very real to me) and then hen says something like “i don’t have the answers to all of these questions, but i’m sure of one thing: you love him and he loves you. you can figure out the rest together. go talk to him” (i think it would be nice for eddie to have this conversation with henren as a couple, since his biggest fears and concerns are about how they could make the relationship work)

eddie feels like he just woke up from a 20+ year long sleep. he runs out of hen’s place, hurrying to his car, and from now i’m picturing a full romcom montage with him just fighting for his life to get to buck’s apartment: traffic, construction work so he has to take a detour, his shirt is drenched in sweat so he has to go back home to change because surely he can’t show up at buck’s looking like that. once he gets home, he sprints to his room to find a new shirt (maybe he puts on too much cologne - the one buck likes - and he has to change again. just because it would be fun to see him in distress). he fixes his hair for the 100th time, grabs his keys, finally opens the front door and stops in disbelief. buck is on his doorstep, hand mid-air about to knock. they look at each other and in that moment they just know. they both lean in and go for the kiss aaand BUDDIE CANON !!!! (+ the buck at eddie’s door parallel finally having the romcom resolution it always meant to have)

of course i have no clue how we could get there, but i do feel like it would be true to the show if they didn’t immediately get together and if there was some angst between them. i hope that once they get together they won’t try to break them up (even just temporarily) so they might have to go through some shit at the very beginning of their relationship for that to happen.

alright tinfoil hat OFF folks. i always try to stay consistent to the show and only come up with theories that i could truly see being developed and i don’t think any of this is unrealistic. buuut i’m still a clown so who knows. quite frankly i’m fine with buddie canon either way (as long as their first kiss is initiated by eddie and it happens in his kitchen <3)

[shutupineedtothink]

It’s about Self-actualization, not Sacrifice

I can’t overstate how much I Do Not Want Agatha to sacrifice herself and/or die at the end of this series, and tbh I’m mad that people are even floating that idea out in the ether.

I don’t care if her sacrificing herself for Billy or anyone else is making a different choice from how she couldn’t save Nicky or stealing witches’ powers, and is therefore “narratively satisfying.” I don’t care if her dying means she gets to be in some kind of eternity with Rio. I don’t care if she was some kind of ghost figure in the comics and we could see her specter in future projects. I do not want Force ghost Agatha.

I want living, breathing, transformed Agatha to come out of this more herself than she ever has been before. Freed from the hold her past and her limiting beliefs and her reputation has had on her for the last several centuries. I want this to be a new beginning of her journey, not the end.

Fortunately, I think Jac and the writers have my back on this. (Please, god)

The journey here on the Road is not about sacrifice. Because a) I don’t believe and have never believed that Agatha actually sacrificed Nicky for the Darkhold. Red herring, it didn’t happen that way. So there’s no narrative reversal to be had there in the first place. And b) the various deaths, the witches’ stories we’ve seen play out so far have not been about Sacrifice either, at least not primarily.

Alice ended up sacrificing her life to save Agatha, but that was not her story in that moment. That was not the narrative we were meant to see.

Alice saving Agatha in that moment was about her stepping into her power, her highest self, the Protection witch she was always meant to be free from the generational curse. Someone who cannot stand by and watch others in pain if she can do something about it. That’s her highest self.

Lilia’s sacrifice wasn’t her true journey either. Her story was about embracing her power, becoming the Traveler, playing out her story in the way she saw and accepting her gifts for what they are (your task is not to control but to see). She too, regained her full power, her full self in that moment, and took out at least five of the Seven with her. She took her power back from the fear that had been holding her for so long, and became the highest version of herself, the Queen of Cups.

Agatha’s journey isn’t about sacrifice either, it never was.

Agatha’s journey, as I’ve said in other posts, is about finding her true self, her true power, unmasking herself from all of the facades she’s worn over the years to protect herself and hide her pain. Answering the question, who IS Agatha, all along? It’s about dealing with her trauma so that she can exist as her true self, and be seen by others as her true self.

We’ll find out in the next couple episodes what that looks like but I can already tell you she’s NOT inherently evil, or inherently good. She is a woman shaped by heartbreak, grief, and sorrow. She has made choices, some bad, some good, and she is capable of making new choices. She is capable of transformation, of peeling away all the false versions of her to find who her truest self is — which I believe, is a leader, a mentor, a guide. The Mother, in many ways.

In that case, sacrificing herself for Billy or the coven or whatever isn’t the play here. It’s teaching Billy (probably, and maybe Jen) what he’s capable of and how to access his true power. It’s the same role she played for Wanda, only this time, when Billy realizes what he’s done (create the Road, probably) she’s going to help him, not fight him for his power. There’s probably also some element of them trusting each other and working together, having seen each other’s true selves.

I’m not going to try to predict the specifics, but my point is that Agatha dying at the end is simply not the move. And if she does, the only way it works is if it’s a dying on the Road to be reborn in the real world type of situation (so everyone else lives too). In which case, fine, I guess, but I still don’t want her to die. I want her to choose life. I think with everything she’s suffered, death is the easy choice. Living and changing and growing and letting people in is much harder.

Besides what an absolute fucking waste it would be of Kathryn Hahn’s talent to just kill off Agatha here and not have her show up later and irritate the shit out of some Avengers.

[phoenixeclipse-lmkau]

Anger

Not an update for Cursed Warlords Main Story. More of a ramble with some spoilers for future chapters. Be warned!

Takes place during Lady Bone Demon Arc (sort of) Not offical to the Au... yet.

You stood behind Tripitaka absolutely flabbergasted as both Sun Wukong and Macaque just left. You couldn't believe it. They actually left. In all the time that you'd known them, they had never just... left.

Turning to look at the Monk you noticed he held a deep glare on his face. No... no... no! How were they supposed to get forgiveness for their crimes? Damnit! You couldn't believe this! The Lady Bone Demon... she was still out there and Tripitaka idiotically listened to Zu Bajie!!

"Good riddance. We don't need those monkey-"

*SLAP!!*

"YOU IDIOT!" you yelled in anger, your heart was pounding in your chest as you yelled at the pig demon. "Do you know what you just did!?"

"Rose-" Sandy was the first to speak only to step back when you shot him a heated glare.

Even through the glamour mask that adorned your face he could still feel the rage you sent his way. This wasn't The Journey To The West and this wasn't Lego Monkie Kid. This was real to you, and everything was different and was much much more dangerous.

"Sun Wukong didn't hurt a mere woman! He has eyes of truth you moron, he has proven time and time again that he is able to figure out who are demons and who are humans! He isn't just a reckless idiot, he is not stupid! After everything that has happened, after all the time that we have spent together YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT! He has done everything to keep from getting the circlet to crush his damned head! You think he'd kill a woman in front of Tripitaka for no reason!?" You screamed, furious at the pig who just sent both of your husband's away.

"That's not to mention that he wasn't the only one who knew that the woman was a demon! Macaque doesn't have six ears for nothing! He tried to warn you and you just wouldn't shut your mouth! HE TOLD US THAT WE WERE APPROACHING A DEMON!" You continued to yell, backing the startled pig away from the group.

You didn't look away from him. Your usual calm or scared demeanor filled with pure anger at the pig. This was one of the few first times that Wukong had kept his head on, he even told Tripitaka that she was a demon. He had shown his proof and yet no one listened!

You had been sure that the Monk wouldn't be stupid about this, with Macaque already warning them, with Wukong showing his proof. But then this idiotic pig just had to ruin EVERYTHING! Hot tears filled your eyes at the thought of watching both Wukong and Macaque experience the circlet again.

No the monk didn't listen, instead he thought they were plotting together!? The two were still fighting damnit! They had been at each other's throats since the beginning of the journey for a reason you didn't even know! Why would they plot over something like this!?

"Rose- They were probably-" Tripitaka spoke but froze when you whirled around.

"I thought you were smarter than this. He was trying to protect you," you seethed as you noticed the Monk stumble back at your furious tone.

You never showed your anger, you always kept a cool head. You had tried to make sure that some things would stay the same and you tried to change others. You were trying to get Wukong and Macaque forgiven for their crimes before going back to your world.

Yes, you were stuck here until the Monk got the scriptures but you wanted to see your husbands forgiven and changed before returning home. In the original book you knew that Zu Bajie would go to Flower Fruit Mountain to get The Monkey King to come back.

But that would leave another opening for The Lady Bone Demon to attack. Not only did she want to conquer the world in this reality but she also wanted to eat the Monk. Macaque had explained her plan, he had told them everything and no one listened! No one but you and Wukong.

Wukong while he was angry at his mate for whatever reason he still listened to him. At least about upcoming battles. Now if only the stupid pig would actually think logically and without his damned dick!

"So... that was actually a demon? No it couldn't have been-" Tripitaka began his eyes going wide with shock. He looked up to where the two monkeys had vanished as fear overtook his expression.

"Yes, and you just sent away the only two who realized it without thinking with your head," you seethed as you clenched your fists.

"If he could tell the woman was a demon then how does he not know who you are? You've said before that you two knew each other and yet he has shown no recollection of you," Pigsu piped up, seemingly trying to prove he did nothing wrong.

"Because Tripitaka’s soul is The Golden Cicada which is a lot brighter than mine. Something we have already discussed and I'm always behind him not in front so if Sun Wukong is looking at us he'll only see Tripitaka’s soul and not mine," you explained the same thing that Guan Yin explained to you when she inlisted you for this journey.

The only reason that the two hadn't recognized you is because you were careful, because you has stayed behind Tripitaka so Wukong couldn't see your soul. The only reason Macaque hadn't recognized you was because the mask you wore made an ever so low sound to make him believe he could hear you normally.

"... Oh please as if-" Pigsy shut up as you tilted your head up to look at him.

"You need to get your head out of your ass," you explained with complete and utter calmness.

You watched as Pigsy's eyes widened in shock before you stalked forward. There was another demon coming up, you just hoped that you could avoid this one while avoiding the Lady Bone Demon. Or if you were lucky maybe he didn't exist here, but you doubted your luck would be with you today.

"Sp why don't you just call them back? You were so close with them before weren't you?" Pigsy snipped back harshly, but he didn't know the full extent of the story.

He didn't know what you three were to each other. He didn't know about the curse, he didn't know of the 'marriage' between you three. He didn't know anything about you, he only knew you were the healer of the group. He didn't even know your real name.

What would happen if you called them? What would happen if they knew who you were? Were they over you? Would they care at this point? It had been over 500 years since the fight in heaven which you wore the glamour mask, before Wukong had gained his eyes of truth. And it had been over 100 years before then that you had last seen them. Over 600 years had passed for them, but with you... it had been a mere 3 years.

It still felt so fresh, everything that happened between you.

"I can't," you respond simply, without going into detail.

You didn't want to think about it. You had run away from them, you didn't deserve to miss them. You didn't want to return to them but at the same time all you wanted was some sort of comfort. For all that they took away from you... they had tried to give you so much. But you valued your freedom more than gold and treasures. You valued your freedom... more than them? At this point you didn't know, you weren't sure what to think right now.

"Let's just go. You'd better pray that your stupid stunt doesn't get us all killed," you spoke, your voice going dead calm and dead serious.

The group stood there for a solid minute staring at your back as you stalked forward. Your body was tense and your hand remained on your bow, awaiting any sort of attack.

Tripitaka was the first to move following after you from atop Ao Lie who remained in horse form. He held a face of worry and he too was now tense after your outburst. He had seen you scared before, he had seen you happy and cheerful. But angry? In all the time that he'd know you, he had never seen you actually angry. It actually sent a wave of fear crashing through him, had he really made a big mistake?

Sandy followed next thinking everything over. He wasn't the one who made the mistake and hadn't gotten yelled at. Yet even he started to worry about what lay ahead after what you said. You so rarely gave this type of input, it was startling to see you speak about the future so confidently.

As for Zu Bajie he stared at the group for a moment. He fucked up, he fucked up big time didn't he? Now they were without their strongest people within the group. Shit! Not to mention the sheer rage from the youngest person within the group was actually terrifying. He had never felt fear from a human before not like that.

Thoughts? Opinions? Send them my way! Did I get distracted from the main story to write this? ... maybe. But eh oh well.

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️ Ranking Richonne

#13: I Love You (S8E14)

Ahhhh probably one of the most anticipated exchanges between Rick and Michonne, and of course, it was sensational. This scene powerfully reiterated that these soulmates truly mean the world to each other. And after seasons of communicating those special three words through every look, touch, kiss, and conversation, we finally got to hear Rick and Michonne directly say what's always been true - they love each other 🥰 Wholly, Deeply, and Forever...

This ily moment, adorably spoiled by our lovely captains 😋, is so tender and heartfelt while also being so natural and clear that these two have been verbally expressing I Love You’s for a while. 

(Side note: I know there’s often debate on Rick’s hottest season lookswise, and really you could make a great case for any season, but lemme just place my vote here for season 8 right quick. 😊 Something about Season 8 Rick was extra fine. I feel bad cuz he was in pain all season, which I truly hate to see...but Rick was looking real right even while everything was going wrong ijs. even tho I think Rick Grimes' TOWL era is about to take the cake 🤭)

Something I so love about Rick and Michonne's relationship is that whenever they go through hardship they ultimately step closer rather than apart. They always eventually close the distance, which was evident in this lovely 'I love you' scene.

And I feel grateful that after experiencing such a devastating loss of their son, Carl, (why, TWD, why? 😭) and having to go on their journeys of grief, Rick and Michonne find their way back to each other truly in this moment. It doesn’t always go that way when a couple loses a kid as we’ve seen from other characters in this very series. But for Rick and Michonne, what they have is so unbreakable that, even in the hardest storm, their love still shines through, rises above, guides, and centers them.

So reflecting on Richonne's I Love You scene will forever have me like...

There’s also a beautiful and heart-rending honorable mention scene in this ep where Rick wipes Michonne's tears and Michonne opens up with Rick (and even makes reference to her son Andre 😭) while trying to help him heal at Hilltop instead of running out and about to get away from his grief.

But Rick still has a bit of savage Rick to get out of his system, so he and Morgan go hunt down some saviors first.

(Side note: while we're talking season 8, this 100th ep kiss in the season 8 premiere also deserves a big honorable mention because...🥵🔥🔥)

When Rick returns to Hilltop after wildin out with Morgan, he’s finally gained clarity on what he needs to start focusing on and who he needs to be healing with. Which leads to him saying those three very special words to the very special woman in his life. 🤗

So the scene starts with Rick returning to his room in a clean fresh tee, showing a clean fresh start to me. (Also Rick + a white tee has been a great combo since season 1, y'all) And he finally knows it’s time to let his wife and son guide him and read Carl's letter.

Michonne enters sorta hesitant I think because when Rick and Morgan returned they def looked like they had dabbled in the dark side out in those woods, and so she might be wondering what headspace Rick's in after whatever he just did.

But the thing about magnets is they always find their way back to each other and so Rick's not grown more distant but rather more aware of how he needs to navigate this season with her.

She finds him holding the letter, and Rick first says, "Thank you." Again, I love that Rick always thanks Michonne. Like as early as when they were strangers in s3, Rick has always vocally expressed gratitude for Michonne. And, in this moment, he knows how much Michonne has been his rock during this unbearable time as well as still fighting for their son Carl and his wishes, and so Rick thanks her for it. Her presence in his life is invaluable and he knows it.

Also, I adore the shared breath they both take when he says this. #TheyAreOne. And Michonne's so relieved that Rick has arrived at this point in his grieving journey.

Then Rick says he’s sorry which is also great cuz he knows going out and handling all this alone is not how magnets do. And Michonne is so understanding when she says, "You don't have to be."

It's just more proof that she is the exact kind of loving presence Rick needs in his life because she’s so good at both accountability and empathy. (Also in 4.09, Rick tells Carl sorry, and Carl also responds with, "You don't have to be." 😭)

And then Rick, knowing how blessed he is to have Michonne love him and stand with him through it all, turns to her and so tenderly says, "I love you." Beautiful x10. 🥹✨

I love how melodic it's said. 🥰 It’s this lovely quiet moment and Rick says it truly like it is a reassuring reminder of something he has expressed to her often and feels deeply.

I love that he turns to really look her in the eyes and has this little nod and subtlest smile when he says 'I love you.' And you just know he genuinely means this. It’s so great, and I could replay it 1000 times idc. 

And Michonne really does complete the perfection when she so movingly says, "I love you too." 🥹✨

Again, you can feel how much she means this. The emotion on Rick's face, when he hears his wife say she loves him too shows that he also can feel how much they both mean this, especially as a small tear can be seen. They are everything to each other. 🥲

(Side note: One of the many reasons why I was so elated to hear Rick call Michonne his wife in that TOWL trailer (which I'm still there btw - haven't left since I first heard it 😋) is because we who love their love story of course already knew he views her as his wife (since 2016) and that he'd refer to her as that in the spinoff series, but by saying it in the trailer it showed that this isn't some big reveal they have to wait to say in the new show. Michonne has been his wife for the longest. Rick has viewed her as his wife for seasons. Their marriage is not a new TOWL development, it is an element of TWD. And scenes like this ily scene in season 8 make that crystal clear. (also I cannot wait to hear Rick call Michonne his "wife" even more and to hopefully hear Michonne call Rick her husband 😊)

I adore that we had so many moments of Rick and Michonne communicating 'I love you' to each other in different ways leading up to this point, and then this scene gifted us with the actual direct ILY exchange between them, and of course it was perfect and proof that...

I really feel confident this wasn't intended to be R&M's first time ever saying "I love you" directly either. In this scene, both of them seemed to communicate it in a way that said this is something they've said before and often. (like it feels like they don't show Michonne's facial expression upon hearing Rick say 'I love you' because this isn't a first. She's heard that man tell her this several times before 😋)

I like to think that why these season 8 'I love you's carry so much weight right here and now is because it might be the first time they've said it to each other post-losing Carl. 😭

How heartwarming is it to know that even in a sea of pain, Rick and Michonne still want each other to know that while their whole world has been changed, the one thing that hasn't changed is their love for each other. 🥹

Their love story is just heavenly. To go from staring at each other through a prison fence and thinking they’d patch her up and then she’d be gone to now declaring their love. Perfection. 🙌🏾

And ILY’s do not seem like a phrase either Rick or Michonne take lightly or would just say to anybody. For them to express this and fall in love with someone, the connection was going to have to be deep and special. And what they found with each other is the deepest love so of course they can tell each other these 3 words with ease.

And because Richonne is the gift that keeps on giving the scene doesn’t stop there. Michonne then approaches Rick and lovingly takes his face in her hands as they share a sweet kiss. 🥹

And only Richonne can make their movement after the kiss feel as passionate and intimate as the kiss itself. Cuz after finally connecting like they’ve been longing to do, Rick and Michonne stay in the moment, looking deep into each other's eyes before leaning their heads against each other with that blessed mirror giving us all the angles. 😍

I love that mirror, y'all. 😋 I'm deeming that mirror and the set designer who placed it there some Richonners cuz, baby, they knew what we needed to see...

The way Rick and Michonne touch each other is always electric, and I love that they seriously feel like one as she rests her hand on his heart and he gently moves his hand up her side. These actors are so gifted at not wasting a single moment or action because they communicate Richonne's love in every second of a scene.

(and when richonne inevitably does that signature forehead touch in TOWL, after years apart...y'all I just might ascend to the heavens right then and there 😇)

It’s also sweet the way Michonne looks at Rick before leaving for him to have this time alone to connect with his son and read the letter.

Having the scene end with Rick reading his son's letter in a whole mirror as opposed to the shattered mirror he saw himself in earlier in the ep, is lovely. And it speaks to the power of Richonne that Rick could arrive at this point, ready to slowly but surely start healing. 

“I love you” really is communicated in every Richonne scene. And while season 8 was a weak one overall, one thing it did well was illustrate the stunning strength of Rick and Michonne’s exquisite and powerful love.

And I love knowing that, thanks to TOWL, we're sure to have some more Richonne "I Love You" moments in store. #GiftThatKeepsOnGivingAndGiving 😌

[poepoesstuff]

Satosugu x Reader Series - Part 1: Meeting Gojo & Geto

Notes: I’ve never written fanfiction before, so please don’t take it too seriously! I was just bored and thought about this idea because I love the concept of being in a poly relationship with Gojo and Geto—it seems like so much fun! I’m new to writing, so feedback, questions, or suggestions are totally welcome! I’m just having fun with it.

Tags:

#Satosugu #Gojo Satoru #Geto Suguru #Reader Insert #Jujutsu Kaisen #Satoru Gojo x Reader #Suguru Geto x Reader #Polyamory #Fanfiction #Jujutsu Kaisen Fanfic #Satoru Gojo x Suguru Geto #JJK Fanfiction #Gojo x Geto #Jujutsu High #Satosugu x Reader

-

You guys knew each other from high school. You came to Jujutsu High later but joined the same class as Gojo and Geto, though you were on a different team. The first person you noticed was Gojo Satoru from the Gojo Clan—a lineage you’d only heard of. His reputation and charm immediately intrigued you. However, it was Geto Suguru who ultimately stole your heart with his calm confidence.

You were introduced to the class about a year and a half before Geto’s path took a darker turn.

As Yaga steps into the class, he calls attention to you. You follow him in, and several surprised faces turn to look at you.

“This is Y/N. She’s a kunoichi from a remote village in Japan and will be attending as your classmate from now on. Y/N, introduce yourself.”

You take a breath, feeling the eyes on you, but stand confidently. “I am L/N Y/N, from the C/N Clan. As of today, I’m beginning my journey as a sorcerer at Jujutsu High. My family is known for preserving sorcery knowledge and secrets. As the new heir, I’ve come to study and hone my skills.”

You notice intrigued expressions, especially from a silver-haired boy with piercing blue eyes in the back. Shoko’s gaze also seems particularly curious. Once Yaga leaves, you take your seat and start your Jujutsu High journey. Quickly, you become friends with Shoko, who introduces you to both Gojo and Geto.

First Impressions

Gojo is thrilled to have you in class and wastes no time bringing you up with Geto.

“So,” Gojo nudges Geto with a grin, “what do you think of the new girl?”

Geto raises an eyebrow, already catching onto Gojo’s interest. “You mean Y/N? She has an interesting technique, definitely useful in a fight.”

Gojo laughs, shaking his head. “Come on, that’s not what I meant, and you know it.” He gives Geto a playful shove.

Geto smirks knowingly. “Well, if you’re asking… yes, she’s beautiful. Kinda reminds me of Erika Sawajiri.”

Gojo huffs, crossing his arms. “Right? I knew I had an eye for these things!”

Meanwhile, you feel lucky to be spending time with both of them. Missions become highlights of your training whenever you’re paired with Gojo, Geto, or both.

Gojo Satoru’s Approach to Win You Over

After Gojo admits he’s interested, he goes all out. Here’s how he tries to impress you:

1. Playful Teasing: Gojo loves to make you laugh. Expect playful remarks and witty comebacks whenever you’re around. His goal? To get you to blush.

2. Showing Off His Power: Gojo’s proud of his abilities, and he doesn’t hold back from showing off. From flashy demonstrations of his Limitless technique to skillful moves on missions, he always seems to be “casually” proving how powerful he is.

3. Grand Gestures: Gojo’s not one for small acts. If he learns about your favorite snack, he’ll buy a whole stash of it. If you’re stressed, he’ll invite you on a night adventure to see the city lights.

Continuing from where we left off with Gojo’s approach:

4. Constant Presence: Gojo wants to be around you as much as possible. He’ll always find a reason to sit next to you in class, join you on missions, or just “accidentally” bump into you between training sessions. He’s persistent and makes sure you notice him.

5. Playful Competition with Geto: Knowing Geto likes you too, Gojo can’t resist turning it into a friendly rivalry. He’ll challenge Geto to sparring matches, jokes, or even silly games to try and prove he’s the better choice for you, often with a smirk and a playful wink in your direction.

Geto Suguru’s Approach to Win You Over

Geto’s approach is more subtle, thoughtful, and grounded. Here’s how he tries to capture your heart:

1. Deep Conversations: Geto values getting to know you on a personal level. He’ll ask about your background, your clan, and your opinions on sorcery. These conversations make you feel like he genuinely cares about who you are beyond your technique.

2. Small, Thoughtful Gestures: Geto isn’t flashy but remembers the small details, like your favorite tea or if you’re having a hard day. He’ll quietly leave a comforting note or share a peaceful place he’s found on campus with you. His kindness is understated but leaves an impact.

3. Protective on Missions: Though both he and Gojo are strong, Geto takes a protective role. He’ll keep a watchful eye over you, subtly stepping in to ensure your safety without making it obvious. It’s his way of showing you’re important to him.

4. Respectful of Your Space: Unlike Gojo, Geto gives you space to make your own choices. He never pressures you to spend time with him, trusting that if you like him, you’ll come to him. This gives him a calm confidence, which contrasts with Gojo’s more in-your-face approach.

5. Gentle Rivalry with Gojo: Geto handles the “competition” in a reserved way, knowing Gojo’s personality. While Gojo’s approach is loud, Geto’s is quieter—he focuses on creating genuine moments with you that show his sincerity, confident that his authenticity will speak for itself.

Gojo and Geto were unbelievably close, and you helped them realize their feelings for each other and get together. They were six months into their relationship before they added you.

[where-theres-smoak-2]

So in my next episode of I just can't stop talking about Dune part 2, lets talk about the ending scene, specifically about the positioning of the characters during the duel and kiss the ring scene, because I think there's some really interesting symbolism there.

At the start of the scene we see everyone enter the room and take their places and what is interesting is the characters are in groups with each representing part of Paul's journey. The best image I could find of where everyone is positioned is this wide shot where everyone is bowing to Paul towards the end of the scene:

It's not the best image but you can just about make out that on the left, where the blue arrow is pointing, you have Chani and the Fedaykin, then in the middle along the back wall, where the orange arrow is, you have Jessica, Gurney, Stilgar and the fundamentalists and then finally on the right with the black arrow is the emperor, irulan and the bene gesserit. Three separate but important groups.

Just before the emperor enters, Paul approaches Chani and we get that exchange, 'this isn't over yet' and 'I'll love you as long as I breathe." To me its really interesting that this final showdown starts with Paul directly in front of Chani, looking at her, with his focus on her. Another interesting detail is that when the emperor enters Paul does not immediately turn to face him, in fact he stays looking at Chani, lingering on her, even when he first begins to speak his focus still remains on her. It is only when he says that the great houses may be curious to hear his side of the story that he begins to move. Again it's interesting that its when he is talking about 'his story' that he moves across the room and that story or journey is visually set out for us. He starts with Chani, expressing his love for her, the fedaykin are also there, the people who took him in and accepted him as one of their own, they very much represent the path that he had chosen for himself. The path that he then steps away from.

Paul begins to approach the emperor and as he does we see him walk past Jessica, the mother that he followed south, whose footsteps he followed in when he drank the water of life leading to him becoming the kwisatz haderach, Stilgar the man who was constant in his belief that Paul was the Mahdi and who became teacher to him, helping him learn the ways of the fremen, Gurney who is a connection back to his identity as the son of Leto and the house Atreides, and the fundamentalists who became the army that he was able to control in order to overthrow the emperor and who will also fight the holy war.

Finally he arrives in front of the emperor and his daughter, the final obstacle in his way, his way of getting vengeance for his father's murder and, through his marriage to Irulan, the title of emperor of the known universe. Of course the emperor isn't going to give up his throne easily which is when we have the duel between Paul and Feyd and once again their positioning throughout the duel is interesting.

At the start of the duel Feyd is positioned here:

You can see he is standing in front of the emperor and irulan, who are outlined in the grey box. Also if you turn the exposure up:

You can make out the bene gesserit there as well in the black circle. This is a visual representation of what it is Feyd is fighting for, he is fighting on behalf of the emperor but his end goal is that he wants the emperor's throne for himself. The way he gets there is the same way paul would, marrying the princess. The bene gesserit being there also shows how they are on Feyd's side, they know how to control him and so would rather have him as emperor and as a prospect for the kwisatz haderach than paul. So in the shot above we have Feyd, and then a visual representation of what he is fighting for but also everyone that is depending on Feyd winning this duel.

The same can be said of this shot here of Paul where you can clearly see Chani (in the blue circle) and the fedaykin behind him:

Like Feyd, Paul's ultimate goal is to be emperor, however whilst Feyd wants the throne for his own selfish reasons, I think for Paul his motivations are that he wants to protect Chani and the Fremen. Paul has seen multiple futures thanks to drinking the wol and he wants to guide them down the one where all his friends and loved ones live. But once again we are being shown a shot that represents what Paul is fighting for and the people whose fates are depending on him winning this duel.

So at the very start of the duel, the two sides are clearly set out and we know what the stakes for each side are. I also like how they are both almost standing guard over the side they are fighting for, like a shield protecting those behind him.

As for Jessica, Stilgar, Gurney and the fundamentalists I do think its intriguing that they are kind of separate in this scene, they way they are position makes it seem like they are almost an audience in a theatre watching to see how it plays out. I did wonder what significance this might have as they do still have stakes in this fight. But I think, and I could be wrong this is just speculation, I think it might be because even though they have stakes in the who wins the fight their fates are already sealed. I think at this point irregardless of who wins they will still unleash a holy war on the universe, the only difference would be whether Paul is actually leading them or whether they are doing it in his name as an act of vengeance for his death. Whereas the emperor, irulan and the bene gesserit's fates still depend on whether paul or feyd wins, if paul wins they lose their power, if feyd does they can control him and stay in power. Chani too I think her fate is dependant on who wins once Feyd takes notice of her, if paul wins she has choices, stay or leave (and she choses to leave) but if feyd had won you can bet she would have been taken by Feyd as some kind of prisoner of war or pet for him to play with. But like I siad that is speculation on my part.

Throughout the duel itself there are also some interesting positions and symbolism going on. For example at first when they are fighting and are evenly match they maintain their positions of Paul being in front of Chani and the Fedaykin and Feyd in front of the emperor etc. However if you watch closely whenever it appears like Feyd is getting the upper hand on Paul and like Paul may lose its whenever Paul is on the side of the emperor. When Feyd knocks him down, Paul is in front of the emperor and lands pretty much at the emperor's feet.

I interpreted this as showing Paul's downfall, showing how he lost his way, it was his pursuit of revenge against the Harkonnens and the Emperor, his desire to claim the throne, that pulled him onto the darker path he is taking. It's again that visually representation of what Paul is going through emotionally/internally. We are seeing him being pulled and pushed away from Chani and the Fremen and that life that had made him happy and being, quite literally, thrown onto this path of becoming emperor and starting the holy war.

It can also represent the emperor's and Feyd's on desires to see the House of Atreides quite literally brought down, laid at the emperor's feet and defeated. It's like we are getting a glimpse of what one potential outcome/future could have looked like, Paul defeated.

Another way you could look at this is that when Paul is kicked to the floor, Feyd is now in between Paul and what he is fighting for, his motivation for fighting. I mentioned earlier that to me their positions at the start of the fight were like they were guards, well now Feyd has broken through that shield and is a direct threat to those Paul loves.

Paul falling down at this position also means that he is now directly facing Chani and the path he's left behind. It is as Feyd approaches Chani, a looming threat getting closer and closer to her, that Paul finds the strength to get back up and continue the fight. Seeing the threat to Chani makes Paul move away from the emperor and towards her and Feyd. I think this shows the shift in Paul's motivations and what is keeping him fighting, what is giving him strength, at first he was fighting to get revenge and the throne or at least I think that was his priority, there were other reasons too but in the moment it was his wish for justice that was driving him, but here it shifts to wanting to protect Chani from a more immediate danger, I said in another post that at this moment dying is no longer an option as it will leave Chani vulnerable to Feyd if he does which is something Paul will not let happen.

Another interesting moment is that when Feyd stabs Paul he first drives him backwards, back towards the emperor, so similar to when he is kicked down the first time, we have this imagery of Paul losing and him standing with his back to the emperor and the bene gesserit, the people who have been the cause of his suffering, and who represent this path of becoming the kwisatz haderach, the madhi and the holy war etc. When they are closet to the emperor, Feyd pushes the knife in deeper.

But then Feyd flings Paul away from him and Paul stumbles back so that he is once again standing with Chani and the Fedaykin at his back. As Feyd menacingly approaches him to finish him off, instead of focusing on the incoming threat Paul looks to Chani, to get a reminder of why he is fighting, why he is doing this and to draw strength from her. When he finally defeats Feyd it is again when he is standing closer to Chani.

I just think its really interesting that during this duel whenever Paul is at his lowest we are shown him on the side of the room with the emperor, bene gesserit, the people who are seeking to destroy him, and then when he is at his strongest and at his moment of victory in the duel he is standing on the side of Chani and the Fedaykin, the ones who give him strength and who he loves.

Once he's pulled the knife out we see him once again look to Chani, all of these looks to me make it very clear that she is his motivation behind his actions, he's doing it for her, he's doing it all because of that vision he had of her death, to keep her alive, which is really heartbreaking because its his actions to keep her safe and alive that are breaking her heart and that ultimately cause her to leave him. But I digress.

After this look to Chani we then see him repeat the same journey we saw him take at the start of the scene. He starts close to Chani and the Fedaykin, crosses the room passing Jessica, Stilgar, Gurney and the Fundamentalists and arrives before the emperor. Only this time he completes the next step, making the emperor bow and kiss his ducal ring.

When everyone else in the room bows, three stay standing, Princess Irulan, the woman who is his key to the throne, Chani, the woman he loves, who taught him the ways of the fremen and the desert and Jessica, his mother who fuelled his legend amongst the fundamentalists and trained him in the ways of the bene gesserit allowing him to become the kwisatz haderach. Not only is it symbolic that its these three women alone that remain standing but their positioning is again really interesting.

They are each a point of a triangle. Triangles have alot of symbolism and often represent three sides of a whole or a cycle. There's religious connotations to it too with the triangle often being used to represent the holy trinity in Christianity. Some meanings that I think could be relevant here though is the cycle of birth, life and death. Jessica representing birth, she is his mother but also she orchestrated the 'birth' of the kwisatz haderach in the south. Chani I think would represent life, she was the life he chose for himself. Then Irulan would represent death, she's the key to the throne and the Paul we knew had to die in order to become the man he is now. She represents the death of his old life.

Another meaning is beginning, middle and end, its similar to the life cycle triangle but this one is a reminder that everything has a process, there's the start, the journey and the end. I think this ties in well with what I was saying about how Paul merely crossing the room showed his journey throughout the film. So too does the positioning of each of these women in his life. Chani was the start of his journey, where he learnt from her, where he fell in love, then he drinks the water and becomes the mahdi, represented by Jessica and it ends with Irulan and him becoming the emperor.

Triangles can also represent protection, power and strength which I think each of these women provide Paul in their own unique ways. They can also mean creation which you can argue that each of these women contributed to who he is and has become, in a way they are the ones who have created him.

What is ironic is at this moment as the emperor is bowing, Jessica communicates with Mother Mohiam and tells her she chose the wrong side to which Mohiam replies there are no sides. I just found this kind of funny considering the room is set up into three very clear sides.

But anyway, moving on, after the emperor and everyone bow we then see Paul, yet again look back to Chani, even after everything he still can't completely let go of that link back to who he was, the life where he was happy and loved as a man and not a prophet. But then Chani walks away severing that last link. Paul keeps his eyes on her until she is completely out of sight, then he half turns, looking down and closing his eyes so that he is front on with the fundamentalists and Jessica. It is at this moment that Gurney tells him that the great houses are refusing to honour his ascension. Paul then turns his back to Stilgar and facing Irulan and the emperor, he looks to the floor and takes that final step when he says lead them to paradise, unleashing the holy war from his nightmares onto the universe. His only hope now being that the fundamentalists believe in him enough that he is able to control this war in his own favour. I think its significant that Paul turns his back to Stilgar, the friend who became a fanatical follower, and looks down to the floor at this moment of declaring the holy war. It's indicative of his shame, of his pain and shows how much its hurting him to make this choice, so much so that he can't look at the fremen as he gives the go ahead.

Honestly I could be looking into this way too much but on a rewatch of the scene I just found it all very interesting the way it was all laid out and how Paul navigating the room seemed to reflect his own personal journey from Paul Atreides to Usul Maud'dib the fedaykin to the Lisan al gaib to the emperor of the known universe and how that is reflected in the people around him.

[pickyourpoisonandevolve]

Boy fucking howdy, the BG3 obsession is real, and so is being unable to sleep. I cranked this out in 20 minutes in an absolute fervor because I’m OBSESSED, as we all are. Please forgive my absence, but let us rejoice that I have been possessed enough to write again.

—————

Admittedly, you all have had better days on the road to Baldur’s Gate. There have been close calls and hard fights, but today has decidedly been the worst. What started as a hopeful descent into the Githyanki Crèche ended in most of your party downed, and watching Laezel’s eyes lose light as she died. Shadowheart thankfully still had the wherewithal to walk you through the scroll you said you’d never had to use, hand in shaky hand. It took you about an hour to detach yourself from her side once you all made it back to camp.

Quiet nods and looks of understanding were sent all around you as you commanded your feet their last few steps to your tent. Gale would take over dinner tonight. Karlach would take care of the owlbear and Scratch. Others would take other duties. You would take care of sitting down on your cot and disassociating before you could unclip both straps of your armor. That’s how Astarion found you anyways.

You had been close, today. Despite the looming threats, you both woke up in cheery spirits. You had gossiped about how Raphael was a scumbag, but a hot one, how Shadowheart and Laezel would definitely make out by the end of this journey, among other things. Once battles had started, you had even found a nice flow physically. Shooting arrows over each others shoulders, stabbing enemies before they could get to the other. Something went wrong along the way. Discussions didn’t seem to go your way. No one you all encountered seemed very convinced of your decisions or leadership. You felt that it had started to infiltrate your team, despite their objections.

But someone had died on your watch. And for that, you’d never forgive yourself.

“Sweetheart, armor comes off before bed, you know.” A little less smug than usual. “He’s worried,” you think in passing. It seemed that his voice came from farther away, until you felt the whisper of his fingers on your shoulder. His way of not wanting to scare you. He’s very familiar with the look in your eyes right now. You have enough energy to finish unbuckling the second clasp before the chest piece falls to the floor with a dull thud. As you extend your torso to stretch properly for the first time today, both sets of eyes fall to a particularly dark red patch in your torso, right underneath your heart. Seems you’ve been stabbed. How long ago is anyone’s guess, but the armor seemed to hold as the worlds worst tourniquet. The volume of voices tune back out as you hear Astarions call for help, the pitch of panic sending you deeper into… something. Not quite nothingness. Not quite enough of something to call it anything. A general state of pain and emptiness.

Two sets of hands lift you enough to lay down on your cot. Voices mill around, but you feel the large hands of Halsin gingerly lift your shirt to begin healing. He leaves you in your bra as he begins his work. He has a way of making his deep booming voice so soothing when he knows you’re in pain. Astarion sits down closer to your face, and has one hand on the side of your cheek. His thumb runs across your cheekbone a little faster than usual, trying to comfort you as well as himself. Halsin has been around this enough that both men don’t seem to be phased, but Astarion starts his mix of worry and chastisement and care. Funny how he can speak so softly and so cutting at the same time.

“How many times have I told you to tell me when you’re hurt? You’re not holding up your end of the bargain,” he says, with no real seriousness. You look over long enough to see his creased brows, but in them, something new. He’s angry at you, for compromising the plan. For compromising his journey. For compromising the trust he put in you for being a team. He’s also mad at himself for not being in front of you to catch the blade.

“You’re no good to me dead, you know. I need you… I need you here.” He says, voice shaky, as Halsin finishes his spell. The newly connected skin is always itchy, so he puts a salve on before he leaves. He puts a large hand on Astarions shoulder and exchange a few words before he leans over and kisses you gently on the temple. He whispers, between the three of you “We’re here to take care of you, my heart. Please allow us to.”

Now that the physical pain has started to subside, the emotions you’ve been pushing down through the day start to bubble up. You start to feel the dirt, the blood, the viscera on your skin. How compressed everything is starting to get. You lean up and start to breathe. A little too fast, a little too heavy. Astarions eyes get wide, he’s seen you stressed but this is something different. You hurry to a nearby abandoned building near camp while he stays behind a step, a little stunned.

Normally this would be the time he freezes, unsure of emotions, unsure how to help. But it’s usually him that’s going through something like this. It’s usually you who calms him down, brings him back to center. What has he done to make you feel like this?

You sit in the corner of a decrepit old rampart. Panic attacks haven’t been prevalent for quite some time. You don’t hear him, once again until he’s next to you. You notice your cot and some creature comforts set up a few feet away. A few curtains strewn to block out the inevitable morning sun. Some candles for light.

“Thought you might like some alone time tonight.” He says, voice deep and steady and sure of himself. For someone so lithe and nimble, you forget he can lift you in his arms. And he does settling you in bed, sitting while you feel him taking his shirt off and leaning you against his chest. The skin on skin contact, you’ve found, comforts him as much as it comforts you.

The shock of Astarion moving with such assuredness brings you a little bit back to surface. You clear your throat and say “I’m sorry for troubling everyone. Today was a little hard for me.” Your voice breaks a little at the end, and so does your resolve as you cry, letting the emotions of the day out.

He runs fingers through your hair and turns you into his chest as you release all your worry from the day. “You know, I honestly don’t know how you’ve kept it together this far, my sweet.” He brings his face to the side of yours, steadying your breathing and letting his breath warm your neck. “I haven’t had to be strong for anyone… well, other than myself. But I didn’t even do a good job then. You’re so much more than you know. To them. To me.” He lays a field of kisses to the side of your face and neck while his arms surround you, fingers lacing together. “I… don’t know how to do this part. I don’t know how to be good at this. To comfort. But I do know I’ve never been more torn apart when you’re in pain. Please. Let me… try. Let me try to be good at this.”

Chest heaving, you look up and take his mouth into yours. You kiss deeply, letting it say all the things you’re too tired to say. Too tired to thank him for. He seems to understand, as he cradles your face in his palm. A kiss that’s said more than you’ve said to each other for weeks.

As sleep overtakes you, he brings you into his chest, arm circling your shoulder.

The last burst of energy wouldn’t allow your mouth to say it, but Astarion felt the tadpole twitch with the three words you two had been dancing around for some time. If his heart still beat it would keep him up for the rest of the night. In hope. In anticipation to say it back. But you two were together. Alive. There would be time for I love yous in the morning.