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dancewithdeath11 · 1 year

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When Hangman Met Dolly

Pairing: Jake “Hangman” Seresin x Reader

Warnings: Fluff, beefing, sexual themes (no sex tho), some angst but not really, happy ending! Why am doing this to myself, trying second person POV this time around, bit proof read-but also not really.

Word Count: 10.5K

(sorry I wanted to get as many plot points as I could)

2010

Jeez… This blows. You huff, kicking at the pavement as you lean against the truck that you were planning on commuting to Pensacola in. It was a good fourteen hour drive from Annapolis where you attended the Naval Academy. And– unfortunately –where your junior-turning-senior roommate met her “future pilot”, Jake Seresin. They encountered each other at a bar and he swept her off her feet a few months ago. Unfortunately, you and Jake just graduated.

Which means that you are well on your way out of there to where you’ve coincidentally both been stationed in Pensacola, Florida. She swears up and down he is the love of her life. But you could tell. He’s cocky and self assured, like most of the men that graduate from the Naval Academy. He is gonna end up calling her within the next week and break her heart, telling her that long distance is too hard or something and that it’ll be for the best.

Glancing up from your beaten shoes you find them eating eachothers faces, her face shining with tears. Murmuring soft promises to each other, an upside down smile on her naive features as he swears to call her all the time. Reaching into the driver's side window, you press the horn for a long moment. Effectively breaking them out of whatever trance, but you add one more for good measure with a smirk. “We’re behind schedule.” You call, making your roommate- well, ex-roommate, whine as she hugs Jake again.

Jake presses more kisses to her lips making you roll your eyes as you climb into the car and make sure to slam the drivers door harder than necessary. It takes a minute but Jake eventually joins you in the car. Your roommates head popping into Jake's window one last time.

“I’m going to miss you so much…” She swoons, raising a manicured hand to wipe away her tears.

“Me too, baby. I’ll call you when we get down there.” He hums and you have to actively try not rolling your eyes. You reach up and shift the truck into drive, slowly starting to roll forward as she frantically spews out her feelings to Jake, endless I love you’s and call me every day’s. He returns them half-assedly…if that’s even a word? Either way he managed to deliver them that way.

Eventually you roll onto the main road, leaving her on the sidewalk. You hummed as you finally reached the high-way, speeding up to merge with the traffic. “So, what’s the plan, sweetheart?” Jake broke the silence first, reaching to fiddle with the old radio.

You eyed him for a brief moment before focusing on the road again. “We will be driving through the night. I’ve set up a plan so that we get equal time’s driving and have also looked up stops along the high-way so that we can shift.” You explained proudly, always taking pride in your way to plan ahead of things. But he only scoffed and rolled his eyes at you. “What?”

“Driving schedules? Looking up stops on the high-way? I mean-”

“It’s a fourteen hour drive, Seresin!” You cut him off with a scoff of your own. Was he really this dense? A single person driving for seven hours is dangerous, so pushing ten or fourteen is just plain stupid.

“That’s a given, honey.” He nods with a laugh.

“Then surely as a fellow member of the Navy you can see the ethics in having a driving plan for such a long drive!” A pout sets on your lips, brows drawn so tightly together in frustration that there’s a distinguishable crease there even if you’re only in your early 20’s.

He throws his hands up in surrender with a nod. Silently giving in, you’re both now basking in a semi-awkward silence. Shit…

Reaching over you flick on the radio. Last thing you were listening to was Dolly Parton. An old cassette you got from your mom to go with your old truck. Taking a deep breath you listen for a moment before reaching up and rolling back the cassette to start from the beginning. After letting it go again, the beat of “9 to 5” filled in the silence of the truck cab. You only lasted a minute before you started singing along under your breath. Hitting every note with ease after listening to this cassette so many times throughout the years. Eventually, a few songs later, Jake opened up his big mouth again.

You could see him shift his whole body to look at you from where he sat. “You sound beautiful. Almost as good as ol’ Dolly herself.” He drawled, and you could practically hear him smirking as he waited for your reaction. Instead of giving him the reaction he wanted, you just hummed before the chorus came on again and you sang along. A chuckle came from him before he shook his head and shifted back to where he was before.

========

Shaking your head, Jake laughs in disbelief. “No way are you going for Victor over Rick! You’re choosing a passionless, sex-less relationship? You’re choosing that over the best sex of your life? Because he owns a bar in Casablanca and that’s all he does?” He pulls into the diner parking lot and puts the truck into park. The two of you stop to look at each other as you think it over for a moment.

“Yeah. Yeah! It’s a matter of sensibility. Victor is the stable choice, and any other woman would say the same.” A smile crept its way onto your lips. Being with Jake was so easy, and he was genuinely a funny guy. Too bad he’s going with your girlfriend right now, you can see the charm she was talking about.

“Oh…I see! I get it now!” He nods, licking his lips as he pushes open his door. Hopping out and slamming it just as I’m getting out as well.

“What? What are you saying?”

“No, just forget about it.” He shrugged as both of you walked up to the small roadside restaurant. It was cute, but clearly busy. You silently hope that you’ll get in smoothly and get back on the road as soon as possible.

Frowning you follow him closely up the steps. “No, I wanna know!” He paused as he was pulling open the door.

“If you’re picking the boring relationship over the best sex of your life. Then that just means that you haven't had good sex.” He shrugged and walked inside, “Two, please.” The waitress nods and directs us to a table.

But you could not believe that he would say something like that so blatantly. “Excuse me, for the record, I have had plenty of good sex.” You scoff out, without thinking. The once bustling diner fell silent for a moment. Their eyes trained on you in confusion causing you to flush with embarrassment. Taking a deep breath you look down, avoiding their gazes as you go take a seat with Jake.

“Okay, then who have you had all this–incredible–sex with?” His brows raise as he puts his hands on the table expectantly.

Your mouth opens to respond without thinking only to shut again. Brows furrowing as you cross your arms and lean back, “I don’t have to tell you, that’s private.” He hums and nods. For some reason that response rubs you wrong. Like he’s telling you straight to your face that he doesn’t believe you. “Barry, Barry Stevenson.” You nod, thinking back to the last romp you had. Was it great, no…But it was still something.

“Barry? No.” Jake stated as he leaned back in his seat. “No, you did not have great sex with a Barry.”

What is with this guy?

“And why not? Who are you to say something like that?”

“It’s all in the name,” He rubs his chin, “Barry is not the name of a guy who is good at sex. Barry can help you with your finances. But he isn’t good at sex. I mean, come on! ‘Give it to me, Barry.’ ‘Ride me, Barry.’” With his brows raised, a smirk comes onto his thin lips. Cocky as ever as he shrugs his shoulders. Head tilted back, a sigh leaves your lips. I still have another eight hours with this guy…You think to yourself. Luckily the moment is saved as a waitress comes over asking for our order. “Yeah, I’ll have a number three, thanks.”

“Uhmm, can I have a cheeseburger? Everything on it. And can you please put the pickles on the side, and no tomatoes. Then I’d like a blackberry pie, heated up with ice cream on the side, not on top. And if you have chocolate can I have that instead of vanilla? Then whipped cream on top, but only if it's real. If it’s from the can, I don’t want it. Please and thank you…” You glanced up at the waitress again, she gave a slightly confused look before nodding and writing it down.

A small chuckle left her as she got ready to leave. “Whatever you say,” She said to me as she pocketed her notepad. Then she spared a look to Jake, “You, mister, got yourself a handful.” She laughed, making him laugh along as she left.

“Okay…” He laughed before turning serious again and looked back at you. “What the heck was that?”

Your brows creased together, “What?”

“The on the side and only ifs or whatever!” He shook his head as he vaguely gestured behind him. Towards where the waitress had disappeared. “You took a solid minute to order a burger and pie.” The blonde tapped at his watch with a disbelieving smile on his face.

Shaking your head a smile forms on your lips. His natural charm and teasing getting to you after having driven for hours with him. Now on your designated break to get dinner. You roll your eyes and start up a different topic. You filled in the good fifteen minutes of waiting for our burgers with talk about places you’ve looked for in Pensacola due to the rumors of the current bunks being horrible and constantly in need of maintenance. Going into detail about your favorite place you’ve found on a new house listing website you stumbled upon. But eventually the food came and you ate it up as quickly as you could. Wanting to get back on the road as soon as possible. Jake just huffed as you encouraged him to eat a little faster than his single fry at a time without even touching his sandwich yet.

You picked up the bill when it came around, and Jake munched on his sandwich. So you took the time to calculate what percent of the tip you owed alongside your meal. Humming in satisfaction as you grabbed the dollars from your purse and laid aside the tip.

“Y’know, you’re actually very attractive.”

“Oh…” You swallow, “Thank you?”

“Stella never told me how attractive you were.”

You what now?

“A-Are you flirting with me right now?” You scoffed as you looked up at him like he was nuts.

“I’m just saying you’re extremely good looking.” He offered a sly smile that had a hidden meaning behind it, you didn’t want to look too far into. Rolling your eyes at him you stood up and collected your things. “Hey- what’d I say!” The man laughed as he quickly pulled out his assumed amount of cash and slapped it on the table before following you out to the truck. Half a sandwich clutched in his hand as he ate it while he walked.

Pausing at the end of the steps you turned and pointed to him, “You’re dating my friend! And now you’re coming on me!” A groan leaves you as you spin back around and go to the truck.

“Listen-” He jogs up to the driver's side of the truck. Going around the back of the truck to avoid him, you end up on the passenger's side. “You can’t deny that you are very attractive-”

You cut him short again, “You’re dating Stella right now! You are in a relationship. Can’t we just be friends?” Pulling open the passenger’s door and tossing your purse in carelessly.

“Friends?” He gets into the driver's seat. You follow suit and get into the truck.

“Yes. Just friends.”

“Nope.”

Another scoff leaves you as he puts the truck into reverse, starting his shift behind the wheel. “What do you mean, nope? Men and women can be friends, y’know? It’s 2010, catch up with the times.” You gesture with your hand in exasperation. Men can be so complicated at times.

“No, they can’t, Darlin’.” Pursing your lips you glare over at him. Leaving you hanging with no further elaboration. And he knows this pisses you off ever so slightly. He learned this early on in the trip. You can’t stand not knowing.

In a monotone, sarcastic way you bite the bait. “Oh please, elaborate…” A deep sigh leaves you as you wait for whatever stupid guy excuse he’s gonna give.

He hums in appreciation as he spares a glance your way. “I mean this in the plainest way possible, and this is not me coming on you in any way, shape or form. But men and women can’t be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.” Jake finished, plain and simple, as if it was the most obvious thing in the whole goddamn world.

“No, no! You’re wrong, I have plenty of male friends.” You state, as if proving him wrong with those words alone. A small smile on your features as you think you’ve gotten him beat.

But he was quick to argue. “Okay. Maybe one or two are okay. But as I said before, you’re attractive. They may be your friend, but they will never be a real friend because they most likely want to have sex with you. The second you let your guard down- let’s see… you have a gnarly break up? After you tell them, do you ever notice how they’re always there?” He lets that linger for a moment. And you let it sink in. No…that can’t be right, right? This jackass can’t possibly be right. “Exactly.”

A thought comes to mind, “So if a guy thinks a girl is unattractive, then they can be friends. Because he doesn’t want to have sex with her then, right?” You counter.

“Nope…pretty much want to nail them too.” Jake nods with his bottom lip jutted out in thought. A frustrated huff escapes your lips. Slouching in your seat as you mull this over. Thinking of all the times you thought a guy who was just your friend seemed a little too chummy.

“So we can’t just be friends?” You ponder to him. This causes a brief silence to ensue as he now takes a moment to think about it.

He shook his head, “Nope. Not really, anyways.”

“That’s too bad,” You exclaim, taking in a deep breath before releasing it in a sigh. “You were gonna be the only person I knew in Pensacola.” Looking over you take in his side profile. He didn’t look half bad, only downside is that massive ego that is bigger than Texas. Makes sense, he’s a strong Texan man anyways. Coming right from the heart of Austin, Texas. A fact he has bragged about so many times when he came over to pick up Stella.

“Yeah…That’s too bad. Because I am a delight to be around.” He smirks as he looks over at you. It was so cocky and on brand of him, you couldn’t help but suppress a grin before turning away to look out of the window. Watching the dark landscape zipping past.

========

“Well, this is it! See you around, and have a nice life if I don’t…” You smiled brightly as you stood on the curb out front of the barracks that Jake is meant to stay in.

It was unfortunate, but you couldn’t help but find it a bit funny that a guy like Jake Seresin is being reduced to the confines of having a bunk buddy. However, you doubt that’ll stop him from bringing a girl back. Jake hummed as he swung his bag over his shoulder. Far less than what you’d brought to fill in your potential home off base. The chance of running into Jake dropping significantly from just living off base in a bungalow rather than having another roommate for who knows how long. You were itching to find the right place and live alone for once. “Yeah…Yeah, I’ll see around Dolly.” He gives a little finger salute before turning on his heels to walk into the bustling barracks.

“Dolly?” You laughed as you covered the sun with your hand, trying to catch another glimpse at the future aviator as he walked further away still.

He turned and continued a slow pace backwards. “Yeah! Cause you sound just like her.” He winked before spinning back around and giving a dramatic wave over his shoulder without looking. As if telling you not to say anything more. That he was going to have the last word.

2013

The task was easy, relatively. Being freshly stationed in Oak Harbor, Washington was nice. It was a good base, and you needed a change of pace anyways. Especially from where you were stationed as a mechanical engineer on a next gen fighter jet. The job itself wasn’t half bad, it was just out of your element.

But here, you were right where you belonged. Working on something familiar…

Only issue…it was like moving schools. You were the new kid. A feeling you always dreaded when coming around to a new base. So as you approach mess, you hope and pray you’ll recognize someone. Either a face from when you were showed around or-

“Hey! Are you that new engineer? For the EA-18G’s?” A woman called. Looking over, you’re met with a stunning woman, still clad in her flight suit. Her hair is a mess and she’s looking at you expectantly.

Blinking a few times you nodded, a smile curling onto her lips making you smile in return. “Yeah! Yeah, that’s me.” You offer her your hand to shake. She quickly wipes off her palm on her pant leg before reciprocating the gesture. Giving a firm handshake before she nods towards the free seat beside her. “Thanks…”

Taking a seat, you pull out your home packed lunch. Having never grown out of living by yourself after getting that first taste of freedom.So you would regularly take advantage of the small kitchen, making lunch in whichever apartment you were renting out for the duration of being stationed wherever you were. “Lieutenant Natasha Trace, but my callsign is Phoenix.” The woman offered. So you smiled and gave her your name in return. But just as you finished you spotted a tall blonde you were not expecting to see. He looked away in such a suspicious way that he must’ve been looking at you before you spotted him. Natasha must’ve noticed the way your face filled with disbelief as she quickly glanced over her shoulder. Coming back to meet your gaze as she rose a brow in confusion. “What? Recognize someone?”

“You can’t be serious…” You muttered under your breath as Jake glanced your way, meeting your gaze. You quickly look back at Natasha. “Yeah, yeah. Something like that.” You squeak as you try to hide your face. Resting your thumb to your temple and leaning your elbow on the table. Your fingers shadowing your face from the bright lights. Doing relatively nothing to hide you since Jake had already locked on.

Even if he’s fast in a jet, he is slow to recognize a face. On his end he was taking a minute. When he glanced back your way to get a second look and met your surprised gaze it clicked for him. A smirk creeped onto his thin lips as he turned to put down his things next to his friend Coyote.

“Who is it?” She asked, genuine curiosity filling her face.

Taking a deep breath, you leaned in closer, “Okay, so after graduating from the academy three or so years ago, I had to get my truck down to Pensacola. My roommate's boyfriend was also being stationed there, so my roommate begged me to give him a ride down. Worst fourteen hours of my life.” You groaned at the memory.

“That’s horrible, why would your roommate do that to you?” Natasha chuckled and you shrugged in exasperation.

“Yeah, and then he tried to flirt with me, but of course, he was still with my friend. So I told him off about it and offered that we can be friends instead. Because he was still a great guy: funny, charismatic, all that stuff. But he said that we can’t. So I asked him why. He said that men and women can’t be friends because the sex part always gets in the way. Or something like that…? Either way, I’ve never had a good male friend ever since.” You finish your hushed rant, looking up to try and find him but not finding him there. Great, you think, maybe he left? Just about to spill more about the man to your new friend, hoping that he won’t come over.

But the dream of him not coming over was crushed as he approached with purpose. Like he knew exactly what he was walking into. Like he knew it was him that was being talked about, and took it as an ego boost. “Dolly–I’ll be damned–it is you.” He hummed as he clicked his tongue, his hands falling on his slim hips.

He’d definitely gotten broader over the years. His face is still stupidly perfect, other than the fine smile lines coming in. Why does such a handsome man have to have such a cocky, egotistical, arrogant, jackass attached to it?

“Jake. Still alive?” You rebutted with a slight glare.

He just laughed it off and crossed his arms over his chest, “Alive and better than ever.”

All while you and Jake were staring each other down, Natasha was watching this all unfold. “Hangman? This is who you got stuck with for fourteen hours? I’m so sorry.” The brunette said, ignoring the blonde standing there like it was her job. It was clear to you that she and Jake most likely know each other pretty well. Have probably flown together on a few dozen hops together depending on how long they’ve been stationed here together. “Also, why did you call her Dolly? That isn’t her name.” Natasha finally directed her attention to Jake. It was a form of confusion for her, but it also doubled as her defending you. Which was sweet since you literally just met her.

“Because she sings a lot of Dolly Parton, sounds just like her in my opinion. She probably played that Dolly Parton cassette twice over during our little road trip.” The pilot smirked as he took a seat from another table and placed it almost between you and Natasha. “Figured the nickname suited her.” He nodded as you rolled your eyes, cheeks flushing at the memory of playing the whole cassette more than once.

The blonde looks at you, but it isn’t in an expectant kind of way. It was like he was studying you. Trying to get a read on how much his comment affected you. But that wasn’t actually what he was doing. Jake was just taking you in. Seeing that you still had that line between your brows when you looked at him like he was crazy. That you still had worry lines on your forehead from being an overachieving worker, much like himself. He looked away from your face and towards the table where a nicely laid out home-packed meal was. Still the same, Jake thought to himself. Taking in how you separated certain things from your sandwich and had your little snacks bagged to keep them from getting condensation on them from your cold drink you probably put in the freezer last night to keep it cooler throughout the day.

“But how’ve you been Dolly?” Jake asked, sincerely and with interest.

You were slightly caught off guard with his sudden interest in how you were doing. “I’m good…Just got transferred here this past weekend.” A small smile creeping onto your lips as you fiddle with the hem of your pants. “How about you, Hangman?” You return the question with a small smirk, using his newly discovered callsign.

“Good…I’ve been good.” He hums before tapping his hand on the table, “Uhmm, how’s, uhhh…” The man hesitated. Clearly trying to remember someone. It clicked, making you almost laugh in his face.

“Stella?”

“Yeah! Stella Rogers.”

“Roberts.”

“Right, that’s what I said. How has she been?” Jake asked with a raised brow.

You gazed right back at him, an unimpressed look settling on your features. Lifting your shoulders in a shrug, truthfully responding to him, “I wouldn’t know, I haven’t talked to her in a few years.”

Jake hummed again as he nodded. A common response for him. “You guys used to be really tight, what happened there?”

Another shrug from you. “Stuff happens. We just drifted apart.”

Poor Phoenix had to sit through the tension after your words. Neither of you know what to say next. Sparing a glance to the woman just past Jake, you try to communicate that you don’t know what to say. That you were a little lost and needed an out. She took in a deep breath and nodded, getting up with a screech of her chair. “C’mon, I’ll show you what was wrong with my jet.” She said, matter of factly.

Quickly you pack up your lunch that remained untouched from when you unpacked it only ten minutes before, “Yeah! I’m sure I can get it fixed in no time.” You smile and get up, turning to Jake with a smile. “See you around, I guess.”

“That’s gonna be a hard one.” Your brows furrowed in confusion at his muttered words.

Pausing as you tilt your head, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I mean, I’m getting transferred out this weekend.”

“Oh…” That’s only three days from now. This was a mere chance meeting. How ironic is that?

“Maybe we could go out to dinner tonight? As friends.” He added quickly at the end. As if he recalled his whole men and women can’t be friends thing from three years ago. But you just shook your head.

“No, uhm, I’m going out with my boyfriend, Ross, tonight…” You admit, and he hums with a smile. Muttering a small good for you. “Well, if I don’t see you around base…have a nice life.”

“Yeah…You too, Dolly.”

2016

“Alright, and this is the head mechanic for the Dagger Squad. Callsign, Dolly. She’s the best, and I asked for her personally with what limited power I have over this mission.” You heard the familiar voice call. Smirking as you turned around and were faced with more than one familiar face. Sighing out as you lock eyes with a particular set of green eyes.

“Dolly!” Phoenix called out with a smile, “You didn’t tell me you were Stateside!” The woman laughed as she jogged over to you. The rest of the squad follow suit in order to properly meet you.

With a bashful grin you hugged her when she made it over, the both of you managing to keep in contact after being stationed in Washington. “It’s good to see you too, Phe…” You hummed as the two of you swayed a little. Pulling back you moved onto the other familiar faces. “Rooster, good to see you again.” You pat the man's arm as you pass him up to go and hug Bob. One of your closest male friends that you’ve managed to keep in touch with. He’s always been respectful, but not straight out avoidant. “Bobby!”

“Hi!” He chuckles as he takes you into his arms. Funny enough, you were just stationed in Lemoore with him, before you were transferred here. Only a few days before him, actually. He presses a soft peck to your hair as you squeeze his waist. “We only saw each other a few days ago, y’know?” He says matter-of-factly.

Shaking your head again, you just chuckle. “Well, I thought I’d never see you again. Except for Christmas, because you promised. Actually, your mother promised.” You hummed as you patted his arm as you pulled away. It was quite a funny story that was kept between the two of you. Pulling away, you nod to Maverick with a smile. Having already had your bout of excitement with seeing him again when you first arrived in San Diego.

You exchange some pleasantries with the other Dagger pilots before you’re met with Jake. Gazing up at him with a sigh as you approach him. “So, you’re still alive, Hangman?” You remember saying something along those lines last time you encountered him.

Clearly, he remembers too. A small chuckle leaving him as he takes you in once again. Just like he did last time. To Jake, you looked better than ever. The same…but somehow better. Almost as if you haven’t aged a day since he last saw you. Only thing that’s really changed is your hair. But it’s hard to tell, your hair being in some kind of up-do you most likely did out of frustration of it being in your way while working. Your cheek has a smear of some kind of fluid, probably grease, that he also took note of on the back of your hand. He smirks, “Yeah, alive and better than ever, Dolly.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “I see the callsign stuck.”

You chuckled lightly, nodding to him as you put your hands on your hips. “Yeah…I made the mistake of going to Karaoke night.”

He nods, about to open his mouth to talk about something else when the squad was being called to the next area. “Say, let’s catch a drink at the Hard Deck. You can bring your boyfriend, uhm, R-Ray…?” Jake stumbled over the name, causing me to chuckle lightly.

“Ross?”

“Right, that’s what I said. I just want to catch up…promise.” He offered again. Walking backwards to try and stay with his group. Coyote laughing at his friend.

“Ross and I broke up a bit ago…But, sure. Drinks would be nice. My shift ends at eighteen hundred.” You said as you watched him continue to shuffle along slower than his group.

“Great! Great, meet me there at twenty-one-hundred?” You nod to his words and he smirks. Waving to you before he takes off in a light jog to catch up with his group.

========

“So basically, we broke up because we wanted two completely different things.” You frown into your drink, shaking your head as you recall your last conversation with your ex only a month ago. “We always used to say that we were so lucky we never moved as fast as our friends. Our friends that got married in a year, or our newer friends who had seven year olds. Because, you know what they say about kids…that it totally kills your sex life. At least, that's what all of my friends with kids tell me- well, my one friend. My friend Lucy…She said it so casually like it was such a widely known thing.” You sighed and shook your head.

“Yeah, I think I can see that…” Jake said, making me nod along with his words.

“But the main thing was that we always said to each other that we were so lucky. So lucky that we didn’t have kids to tie us down. To stop us from flying t-to Greece for a week on a whim, or having sex on the kitchen floor!” A soft laugh leaves the both of you, taking a long drink from your drink before you speak again. “The problem was that we never did that. No spontaneous trips…no kitchen sex. And when we talked it out and we established that we wanted different things, and called it off. A-and I’m not even sad about it. Four years of my life, gone, and I’m totally fine.” You nodded almost too much, as if trying to convince yourself that you were over your ex-boyfriend.

“Yeah, you seem totally healthy right now.” Jake nods with a small smile on his face. The Hard Deck is bustling with life. Not as many khakis tonight as you’d expect for a Navy bar. But I knew that there were maybe one or two members of the Dagger squad here, besides Jake. Then some random Top Gun students, navy staff, and what you can only assume as usual locals.

For some reason it hit you all at once that Jake has been the one asking questions all night. That he didn’t seem to mind listening to you rant about your ex-boyfriend. He was listening, like a good friend and never prompted himself. “God- Jake, I’m so sorry. I haven’t been asking you any questions! How’s the love life on your end?” You asked quickly, setting your drink down and situating yourself to be more alert. To make it look like you were actively listening to him.

The pilot puffed his cheeks out and shook his head a little. “Man, I was in a relationship too until recently. She was apparently, uhm, cheating on me. Said she doesn’t think she ever loved me…It- It was rough.” He said with an awkward cough. As if trying to cover up the fact that he was in a relationship like that. One sided that ended in betrayal.

“God- Jake, so sorry to hear about that. That must’ve been rough…” Reaching out, you place your hand over his in a comforting kind of way. Offering a soft smile when he looks up to meet my gaze. “If you ever need to talk, I’m willing to listen.”

His eyes narrowed at me, “Are we becoming friends right now?” Jake asked in a hesitant voice.

That made you think for a moment. Recalling his words from before. But it was also sweet. He seemed genuine while asking. And you could feel it too. “Yeah, I think we are..”

========

“What do you mean you’re just friends with Dolly?” Rooster inquired while he sat with Jake. The two of them have decided to go to the batting cages for the day for fun.

It’d been a rough few weeks and now they were being offered a permanent position at Top Gun. After Jake saved Mav and Rooster the day of the Uranium Mission, the two pilots decided to let by-gones be by-gones and became friends. Both of them found out they played a little baseball in high school and decided to hit up the cages on a free weekend.

Eventually, Dolly became a topic for the pair of aviators. “Yeah? What’s wrong with that? It’s…nice.” Jake shrugged while taking a sip of beer as they took a break from batting in the San Diego heat.

“It’s nice? Are you shitting me!” Rooster scoffed a laugh, “You’ve got such a babe hanging off your arm on the daily at work. And you’re just shooting the shit? Having movie-takeout-nights at each other's places, and you’re not together or hooking up?” The mustached man took off his sunglasses as if to accentuate a point. But Jake just nodded along.

Jake really saw nothing wrong with it. He knew what he said almost six years ago to Dolly. It became a laughing point now for the two of them. But other than that he saw not a single thing wrong with their relationship. “I’m not shitting you, this is probably the first female friend I’ve had in my whole life that I don’t want to have sex with. I feel like I’m growing as a person. I can talk to her about things and get another opinion on them that I normally wouldn’t hear.” Jake smirks to his friend. But he only gets a brow raise in response. As if it wasn’t as great a feat as he made it out to be. “Oh! Come off of it Rooster! Name one female friend you’ve had that you didn’t want to nail at some point!” The blonde barked out a laugh.

Rooster tried to sputter out a response, slightly embarrassed by Jake’s brashness in such a public setting. However, it occurred to Rooster that he always had that thought. Fleeting at best before finding out they were in a relationship or weren’t interested in him. At that, Rooster pouted and slouched in his seat.

“Exactly.”

July, 2017

Jake was lounging on the couch, watching a random program on his TV when he got the call. He let his phone ring for a moment on the coffee table before he caught the name on his screen. A small smile turned up his lips when he picked it up. “Hey Dolly, why are you calling so late?”

“I’m so-sorry for calling so late. C-Can you come over? Please?” Your voice came out hiccupped and weak. Clearly upset by something and in desperate need of comfort. It made Jake immediately more alert, but he played it off.

“Yeah, I can come over.” He was already slipping on his shoes and grabbing his keys.

“Tha-thanks-”

A quick drive later and Jake was knocking on your door. Impatiently staring at the wood as he bounced on the balls of his feet. Some shuffling was heard on the other side of the door before it opened to reveal your blotchy face and tearful eyes. “Hey Dolly…” He muttered softly as he let himself inside. Closing the door softly as he looks down on you with a small smile. “What is it?” Jake asked as he placed a hand on your lower back and guided you to your kitchen. It was a simple move but it made you feel so much better. Distracting you until you remembered why you called Jake over.

“He’s getting married- can you believe that!” You laughed wetly. A sob breaking past your wobbly lips as more tears spilled down your cheeks. “I need tissues…” Jake was currently moving around your kitchen collecting the makings for tea. In particular chamomile and ginger tea. Something you’d always have when you’re sick.

Jake's brows furrowed in confusion. He grabbed a random box of tissues from the counter and set them in front of you. “Who’s getting married?”

You had the audacity to scoff as him, “Ross!”

That was a name Jake hadn’t heard in a minute. But after you raised your brows at him expectantly, awaiting his reaction, that’s when he remembered. “Oh-” That was good enough for you to talk again.

“Can you believe that! H-He just called and said that he was getting married! To some secretary he met three months ago!” You blubbered, Jake quickly moving to comfort you. Setting down whatever he’d collected to take you into his strong arms. “He didn’t not want to get married- the truth was that he just didn’t want to marry me.. He didn’t love me.”

“If you could take him back right now, would you?”

You shook your head as you took a tissue and wiped your face again. Frowning deeply as you stared blankly at the table. “No…it’s just-” Another hiccup, “Why didn't he want to marry me?” You replied shortly as you got up and walked towards your room. Your fluffy baby pink robe swaying along with you as you rushed to your sanctuary. Jake was quick to trail after you. Watching with a small smile as you threw yourself onto your bed dramatically. Curling up with all of your fluffy blankets and cushy pillows. “What’s wrong with me?” Jake crawled onto the bed and laid down facing you. Gently brush some hair from your forehead.

“Nothing.” Jake murmured.

“I’m difficult.”

“You’re challenging.” He countered affectionately.

“I’m too structured and I’m completely closed off.”

“In a good way.”

You sat up in a huff. He followed with a soft touch before you turned to him with a pout. “Can you hold me? Pl-please…?”

Without another word he pulls you into a soft hug that has you hiding your face in his neck. He smelled like peppermint and cinnamon. A smell you’d come to love and find comfort in while hanging out with Jake over the past year. Talking about everything and nothing on those quiet nights where you had nothing better to do. Or the nights when the Hard Deck was so crowded it forced you two closer together than friends would normally stand. On those nights his hand would find your waist to keep you from falling if a sailor vying to the bar accidentally knocked into you.

He tried to pull back but you didn’t want him to leave just yet. You wanted to be with him a little longer. For him to pull you against him tighter. So, when he pulled back enough for you to see his face, you whined pitifully. Hands going to his shoulders to keep him from going too far. “Just a little longer?” You whispered hopefully.

He hummed and pressed a soft peck to your lips before pulling you into his chest again. The two of you stayed like that for a few minutes before he pulled back again. “You feelin’ better?” Jake asked softly. You only murmured some response that you weren’t even really paying attention to as you kept stealing glances at his lips. Blinking rapidly as you realized what you were doing and looking back up to his soft green eyes. Only for him to look right back at you. No doubt as if to say that he saw you looking at him like that.

That’s when he pressed another soft kiss to your lips.

It was longer, not as fleeting as the one before that could’ve been passed off as friendly. This one had something behind it. Whether that was built up sexual tension or love was debatable for both parties. One kiss turned into two…then four, then…

========

“Mmmm…” You shifted in the bed, rolling over with a smile as you slowly woke up. Only to be startled out of that blissful morning state with the clank of a buckle and the rustling of clothes. Sitting up with your white sheets clutched to your chest you found Jake getting dressed. “Where are you going?”

Jake looked up from where he was putting on his jacket. “I gotta go home, get changed, then go to work. And you have to get up and also go to work soon.” He grunted out as he slipped on his shoes. You pouted over so slightly as your brows drew up in a silent mix of frustration and confusion. Why did this piss you off? Why are you feeling pissed off? It’s a reasonable excuse to leave- “Let's go out to dinner tonight, seven work for you?”

Looking up you are met with Jake standing right next to the bed. Looking down on you expectantly. “Y-Yeah…Seven works.”

“Great..” He muttered as he leaned down and pressed a quick peck to your hair before turning to leave again. “I’ll text you the details later today.” And with that he was gone. The two of you were quick to call up one of the dagger squad members. Conveniently enough, those members happened to like their gym mornings. So what Hangman and Dolly did last night became the topic of the gym between Phoenix, Rooster, Bob, and Coyote.

=========

Your anxiety was through the roof as you tried to debate on what to do. Honestly, you didn’t know how you felt about Jake. He was nice and funny, and the last person I wanted to talk to at the end of the day. But you guys were friends. You couldn’t let one night ruin your friendship…

So you decided you would say it first. All while you were getting ready for dinner that night after work you kept rehearsing the words in your head. It was somehow worse that you didn’t see anyone throughout the day either. Being stuck in an office where you barely got any work done as all you could do was think about Jake.

When you were safely at home and getting ready you kept saying the words to yourself. The words that you would say to Jake.

It was a mistake.

As soon as the waitress left you practically blurted, “It was a mistake.”

An uneasy smile on your red lips as you wring your hands in your lap anxiously. Hoping and praying that he would just let it lie. He nodded, “Thank god- Yeah, it was a mistake.” He chuckled wearily and took a sip of his wine.

“Yeah, a complete mistake.” Just as you finished, you took another sip of wine. Soon enough silence fell over the table. People chattering besides and around you. However, the silence that fell over your table was almost uncomfortable. A feeling you haven’t felt for a while with Jake. The two of you are saved by the delivery of your appetizers salads. Quietly you eat, eventually catching eachothers eyes in small fleeting moments.

“That’s what I like about us. It’s just so nice to have a meal and not talk.” Jake suddenly said before stuffing more salad in his face.

========

August, 2017

It was a beautiful ceremony and now an astonishing reception for Penny and Mavericks' wedding. Right now Penny and Mav were having their first dance. It was slow and to some older song they used to jam to when they were in their younger years.

The ceremony took place on the beach out back of the Hard Deck, simple but so on brand. Then they moved half inside, half outside for the reception after. Everyone helped out when asked to help decorate the Navy bar for the reception.

You were so happy for them.

But you also couldn’t help but feel down in the dumps. Having felt so lonely lately. Actively avoiding Jake aside from work encounters that wouldn’t exactly count. After…that night you only hung out alone one other time and it killed you so much that you decided to either make an excuse to get out of the next ones or invite someone along. Apparently Jake had the same idea. Only having us together on group outings and sticking with Rooster or Coyote most of the time. All while you sidled up with Phoenix and Bob just the same.

So imagine your surprise when Jake comes around.

“Beautiful ceremony.” He said with a small smile. You only hum in response, making his smile fall as he steps in front of me. Not giving me the option to look away without being outright mean. Something you didn’t like doing. Something Jake knew and was now taking advantage of. So you met his piercing green eyes with a heated glare. “What’s up with you, I thought we agreed it was a mistake. You’re still acting like I kicked your puppy or something.” Jake asked with a little too much amusement than you would’ve appreciated.

You scoffed and turned away from him. Not wanting to get into it in the middle of the reception. Turning back to look at him only to find him just where you left him. So you waved him along before spinning on your heels and weaving through the crowd towards the parking lot. Pushing your way outside, you ended up pacing for a moment before Jake came outside. “What are you insinuating, Jake?”

He crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m saying that you’re avoiding me. What happened, we agreed it was a mistake, I don’t see why you’re dragging this out.” Jake shrugged.

“What- It just happened!”

“Three weeks ago!” A low groan emanated from you as you tried to keep back your frustration with the subject. “You know how one year to humans is like seven years to a dog?” He asked, his hand coming up to his face. Forefinger and thumb rubbing along his chin in thought.

Your brows pinched together at his words. “And who’s the dog in this situation?”

“Isn’t it obvious? You need me to paint a picture for you?” He threw back cockily.

“Me? I’m- I’m the dog!”

“Yes! Why can’t you just get over it!”

Hot tears welled up in your eyes as you snapped right back at him, “You wanna act like what happened didn’t mean anything!”

“I’m not saying it didn’t mean anything. I’m saying, why does it have to mean everything?”

“Because it does.” The build up of tears fell over. Streaking down your flushed cheeks as you stared up at him in disbelief.

“What-” He puffed a soft laugh, “What was I supposed to do? You were looking up at me with those sad puppy eyes, asking me to hold you a little longer-”

“What! So it’s my fault, you had sex with me, because- what? You felt sorry for me!” You raised your voice at him. Flushed with anger as you put together what he was saying.

“Dolly-”

Without thinking you slapped him. “Fuck you!” You stormed back inside to go say goodbye to the new couple and take your leave. What is up with him? You thought it was more than that. That what happened would mean more. But apparently to him, it was just a pity fuck. Wiping your tears as you walked you made your way over to your things. Grabbing your phone out of your purse, using the camera to fix yourself before you slung your bag over your shoulder. Ready to go say goodbye to Penny and Mav.

“Dolly, please-” Jake appeared by your side again.

“Hangman-”

“-And we’d like to thank Hangman for saving Rooster and I merely a year ago. Then of course our head engineer, Dolly. A vital part of our team from the ground. Both of which have been such a help over the past six months with the wedding. Going above and beyond to calm both Penny and I down whenever we got stressed over the wedding. Of course, so have the rest of the Dagger squad. But damn it. Hangman and Dolly as a team- downright unstoppable. So thanks to the both of you as well.” The two of you paused as heads turned your way. Smiles being flashed your way as you and Jake stood dumbfounded at the sudden thank you from Maverick.

Sucking it up, you plant a smile on your face. Nodding and waving shyly before you glance up at Jake. Seeing him already doing the same.

Shit…

========

October, 2017

“-on the line. Call me, call me any, anytime! Call me, I’ll arrive. When you’re ready we can share-”

He’d been singing over the answering machine for a solid minute or so while you got ready. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence now. He’s been ringing your phone off the line after he’d found out you silenced his calls and muted his messages. You couldn’t bring yourself to block his number, on your cell nor the landline. Just in case he really needed to get a hold of you. But right now it’s looking a lot like this. So you caved. “Jake.”

There's a small fumbling on the other line. “Dolly?”

With a deep sigh you ran your fingers through your hair, leaning back against the counter as you held the phone to your ear. “What do you want, Hangman?” You used his callsign. Showing that you really weren’t in the mood. A habit you had before, and one you can’t seem to shake.

“N-Nothing… Just,” He cleared his throat nervously. “Sorry I wasn’t expecting you to pick up…Just- H-How’ve you been?” The pilot managed to get out after a moment of stuttering. Something that is foreign to Jake. And something that’s foreign to you as well, he never seemed to stutter.

“I’ve been okay.”

“Good…that’s good. Umm- so I was thinking that we could maybe go out to dinner…?” He asked with a slight waver in his voice.

You missed him, but you still felt hurt. “Not tonight, I’m just about to head out.”

“Oh- where are you going?”

Shaking your head you sighed at him. “I’m late. Goodnight, Hangman.” You said blandly before hanging up on him. Quickly leaving your apartment to go meet up with Phoenix and Bob.

=========

Hangman was currently taking his time. Taking too long to get ready for the Navy Ball he didn’t even want to attend right now. By the time he would get there it would only be an hour before they started to kick everyone out.

He kept thinking about you.

What went wrong? Why did he say what he said? He cared about you. He cared about you so much it hurt. It hurt that night when he slept with you because right after he felt like he betrayed your trust. He didn’t know if you wanted it right then because you were just hurt by the news of Ross’ wedding. It almost hurt more when he was already halfway out the door when you asked where he was going the morning after. You sounded so heartbroken over him leaving that he wanted to crawl right back into bed with you.

He hurried up his motions to get ready. Knowing that you were at the ball was his only solace as he jammed his socked feet into his dress shoes.

You on the other hand were drained. Your dress felt too tight, the music wasn’t helping your headache. The man droning on in front of you doing nothing to help the headache. You honestly weren’t paying attention to him. Did that make you feel bad, yes. But you were too tired to care.

Suddenly he was laughing and you took a moment to process this before you joined him. Throwing your head back in one of your more believable fake laughs.

You quickly tried to think of an excuse to get away from this guy. Your eyes locked onto a Dagger squad member and you did your best to look surprised. “Sorry, I haven’t seen this person in forever! I’ll see ya later.” You rushed, brushing past the man with a roll of your eyes as you walked over to Fanboy. “Save me.” You whispered quickly.

“What?”

And that was how you ended up dancing with Fanboy for a while before you both retreated to the bar to complain about the choice of music that was blasting through the hall. “Y’know what, I might ditch. I’m so tired…” You drew out as you gave Fanboy a look that told him that you weren’t kidding.

Apparently Penny was on the other side of you. “Oh, c’mon. Have another dance or two. I know Mav has been wanting to dance with you.” She piped up, making you feel bad. Looking back at her you offer an apologetic smile.

“I don’t know, Pen…”

“Just wait, five more minutes. I’m sure he’ll be back around.” She pleaded softly, making your brows furrow as you really contemplated if you should or not. You’re head pounded, completely overwhelmed by the music and people around. If another admiral's wife asked where your husband was you’d lose your shit. Regretfully, you nod. Turning back to Fanboy to pass the time since the two of you were in a discussion about the Star Wars trilogies.

Maverick did come around eventually, his smile brightening ten fold as he saw you. He passed by and greeted Penny with a peck. Tracking the man expectantly, you watched as Penny leaned in to whisper to him quickly. Without a doubt about how you were about to leave.

“Dolly, c’mon. One last dance then I’ll give you a one way ticket out of here. What do you think?” Maverick said as he approached me. Offering me his arm with his ever so friendly grin. Giving the warm feeling a father would as you smiled back. A genuine smile for the first time all night. You let him sweep you into the crowd. A slower song playing allows you and Mav to just sway and talk softly to each other. “Are you okay, Kiddo? You seem down…” He asked.

You sighed and shook your head slowly. “I-I don’t know…” You mumbled before you rested your cheek on his shoulder.

He was silent for another beat before talking again, “Is it because something happened between you and Hangman?” You were quick to pull back and blink up at him in shock. He quietly laughed at my reaction. “There was some hot gossip a few months ago. After that…the two of you seemed distant. Then you seemed to not talk to each other at all after the wedding. Some people said you had a fight.”

Tears filled your eyes before you confirmed with a slow nod. “Yeah…Yeah- we fought.”

A small smile came onto his aged features before he pecked your forehead. “Do you miss him?” Another nod, “Then why didn’t you two try to talk it out?”

“That’s what we did at the wedding…That’s why we stopped talking.” You wiped away your tears as you smiled still. “I don’t know what to do Mav…” Your voice wavered, full of emotion as you looked to the older man for some guidance. Just like you always have since you first met him all those years ago.

“Mind if I cut in?”

Your head whips over to the ever haunting voice. Seeing Jake with red cheeks and his hair windswept. Suddenly Maverick lets you go. “Be my guest.”

“Mav-”

“Dolly.” He responded, it was firm but also playful. A smirk on his lips as he looks to you before sending a slight glare to Hangman before he walks away.

“Dolly…” Looking back up you watch as Hangman stands there. His hands clenching and unclenching at his sides, he was aching to touch you. “C-Can I have this dance with you?” He offered a trembling hand. You looked at how it shook before you looked back up to see Jake pleading silently with his eyes. “Please?”

Wordlessly, you took his hand. Stepping closer, but also keeping a fair distance as you placed your other hand on his shoulder. He cradled your hand in his, his other finding your waist. “Took so long, I thought you wouldn’t show.” You deadpanned as you danced to another slow song. Staring over his shoulder as you refused to meet his gaze. This song was somehow slower than the last.

“I was doing some thinking, and the thing is I love you.” He said all in one breath.

Now that got you to look at him. He didn’t stutter, he wasn’t nervous or lying.

“What?” You gaped in shock.

“I love you.” Jake whispered. To you but almost to himself as well.

Taking in a shaky breath as you licked your lips. Feeling your mouth go dry as you struggle to find the words. “How do you expect me to respond to this?”

“How about you love me too?” He gazed down at you in the most lovesick way you’d ever seen. Never have you seen this with any of his past girlfriends he’s had over the past year or so…

Your heart rate picks up and you exhale sharply. Feeling an urge to run and try and process this all in the comfort of your plush bed. “How about I’m leaving.” You pull away from him and brush past him towards the exit. Brushing past people with small excuse me’s and sorry’s.

“Doesn’t what I just said mean anything to you?” Jake was trailing after you as close as he could without stepping on your dress. You whipped around in the crowded floor to face him.

“I’m sorry, Jake. I know you’re lonely, I’ve been just as lonely. But after everything that happened you can’t just show up here, say sorry, and expect everything to be okay. It doesn’t work that way.” You said in a raised voice. It was part out of desperation to get away, and because of the still bustling party going on around the two of you.

“How does it work then?”

“I don’t know, but not like this.” You shook your head at him. Turning to leave again but he grabbed your wrist gently to prevent you from turning away.

“How about like this? I love that you get cold when it's seventy one degrees out, I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich, I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts, I love that after I spend a day with you I can still smell your perfume on my clothes and I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” He finished with a huff. Shaking his head as he offered a small smile. Waiting patiently for you as you stared at him like he was nuts, that signature little furrow in your brow making that crinkle appear.

Tears welled in your eyes as you scoffed a laugh, “God- That is just like you Hangman. You say things like that and you make it impossible for me to hate you…I hate you. I really hate you.” You let out a small sob as you reached up and wiped your tears again. He smiled slightly before taking your face softly in his large hands.

You smiled as you grasped his wrists to keep him right where he was. “Love you too…” He whispered before pressing his lips to yours. It was a slow but sensual kiss. Filled with nothing but love. It felt like fireworks on New Years Eve. Your chest felt warm and fuzzy as your stomach flipped. Jake had similar feelings. To the both of you, everything was finally right in the world…

Kissing in a crowded room, but the two of you didn’t know any better.

Note: Sorry I’m so late with this, I literally drove six hrs home from college that weekend on a whim so I got loaded with homework early in the week. But here it is now. Plz have mercy on me, this is only a random thing I’ve been wanting to do. I didn’t stick to the plot of When Harry Met Sally too much, but it’s also blindingly obvious. First plotted story that isn’t just smut lol…

Apologies if it's ass

#hangman x you #hangman x reader #jake seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin #top gun maverick #tgm fanfiction #fanfic #literallywhydididothistomyself?

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narratingvoice · 6 months

Text

My sincerest apologies for the radio silence from this blog recently. I know, it's very out of character for me. The thing is, I've been in a bit of a pickle over the past few months. The fiscal year for 2023 didn't end nearly as profitably as I projected, not even with the hype and celebration surrounding

THE TENTH ANNIVERSARY OF THE STANLEY PARABLE (2013)!

Server maintenance isn't free, you know, and neither are infinite holes. And with Unity changing its pricing structure on top of it, well, I really needed to put the old noggin to work finding a way to squeeze every last dime out of my fans provide new and valuable pieces of entertainment that will be worth your money. And that's why I'm thrilled to announce my partnership with the fine folks at I Am 8bit to bring you: The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe: Collector's Edition!

It's true! Yes, I know I did a fake announcement for something similar last year, but this one is for real! A physical product that you can purchase and have delivered to your home, and play on your Nintendo Switch or Playstation 5. And this package involves absolutely no changes to the game itself, which really takes a load off my back. Since I have no presence in the physical world, I have to trust that my collaborators will deliver the finest quality items. And trust them I do. Shall we take a look at all the wonderful bonuses you'll receive?

Stickers!

Just like the ones I slapped onto Stanley's bucket, now you too can slap these stickers on your own bucket. Or anything else that currently lacks stickers on it. You will not receive a bucket to stick them on. We floated that idea, but Mr. 8bit told me he'd rather not have to lug dozens of buckets down to the post office every day. You'd look like a right idiot doing that, I agree. So get your own bucket and enjoy the thrill of sticking!

Oh, and do be aware that whatever object you affix the "Property of Stanley" sticker to, does legally become Stanley's property, and he will demand you send it to him.

More surprises under the cut!

An instructional manual!

"But Narrator," I hear you saying, "didn't you just say you're not giving me a bucket? What do I need this for?" First of all, do not interrupt me when I'm giving a presentation. Second of all, this manual is for the bucket that's in the game. I've noticed many players do not seem to know how to operate the bucket, and treat it like it's a person rather than an inanimate container. With this instructional manual, I will give you a comprehensive guide as to what a bucket can do (such as: prevent water from spilling all over your trousers) and what it cannot do (such as: love you back). I have had some harrowing experiences in the field of instructional manual writing, but I think this one is some of my finest work yet.

A figurine!

Yes, our most requested piece of merchandise is finally here! The OFFICIAL Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe Stanigurine stands 5 inches tall and is made of durable PVC. And as with the virtual Figustans, that's all there is to it. There's no articulation or any type of toy action. You don't get anything but the feeling of deep satisfaction at owning this collectible. The package only comes with one, so why not buy six copies if you really want to recreate the game in your home?

But wait, that's not all!

If you are an absolute Stanley Parable fanatic, you'll want to supplement your Collector's Edition with even more plastic tat commemorating your favourite game. And you definitely want to support me as much as possible, right? So you can also buy:

The button that says the name of the person playing the game!

For just $10, you too can have a button that says your name, presuming your name is Jim. The button will only say the name Jim and will never say any other name, no matter how often you press it. I found that a lot of players really got into the immersive experience of being Jim, so I decided to keep it that way instead of programming it to say a whole lot of names. Sorry, but there are too many different names in the world. You're Jim and you'll like it.

Vinyl albums!

When you buy the Collector's Edition, you'll get a free code to download the Official Soundtrack in MP3 format. But what if you don't like MP3? What if you're a bit more old-fashioned in your audiophile taste? Well, I've got you covered! With this 2-record set, you can listen to all the office ambience on your gramophone or turntable. Why, you could even DJ a set with it! If you do, please send me your mixtape and I'll give it an honest review. My music taste is impeccable.

An instructional audio cassette!

Yes, this is just a cassette telling you how to install and run a copy machine. Listen, I took some odd voiceover jobs here and there to pay the bills. And I figured, you lot are so ravenous to hear my voice that you'd even pay good money to hear me deliver some boring instructions. At least, that's the impression I get from the more saucy side of the fandom. So that's what you get. Do I do anything funny? You'll have to buy it and find out!

Hold on, Stanley is trying to tell me something. What do you mean, nobody has a cassette player any more? Why wouldn't they? It's the perfect compact audio format! It's got two sides, which is more than you can say for a CD, and it's a lot more portable than vinyl. Well I'm not shipping out cassette players. You can take it or leave it. No refunds.

#the stanley parable #tsp #ask blog #original #gotta be on that grind tbh #((im genuinely extremely excited about this))

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solitarily-sofia · 2 months

Note

i wanted to give just a few more of my heartstopper opinions lol

1.) the teachers are great characters and not at all pointless like some people try to make them out to be. heartstopper is targeted to an adult audience just as much as teens and it is soo so important to see adults having moments of discovery the same way the kids did bc its never too late to have good experiences in relationships and even if u missed out on that in high school or college, theres no deadline. i think seeing that message is very powerful.

alice was correct in switching aled for issac bc as much as i miss aled and i think having demi representation would be awesome, issac embodies aled in a good way, provides aroace rep and leaves open an opportunity for a radio silence adaptation!

charlie would definitely propose first. alice has said that n & c both plan on it and buy rings but they dont know who would actually do it. i dont think nick would propose first bc as seen in the past nick always waits untill he is entirely sure charlie is ready for something, such as the kiss, or saying "i love you". but i do agree that they would both plan on proposing to each other 🫶.

last thought is that although it is really cool that so far all the actors physically looked so much like the characters, that is not the most important part of the casting process. i know some people are upset the actor for micheal doesnt nessecarily match the comic description, but i feel like in the clip we got he embodies the character so well that it doesnt even matter.

thanks so much for reading i love sharing my opinion and seeing other peoples thoughts 🩷

Hii I'm so so sorry I didn't even see this until I checked my ask box!!

1. I completely agree, the teachers are an incredible addition to the story. And I think it's very comforting for young adults/adults when watching knowing they don't have to be teenagers to experience wholesome gay romance. It's a great message to send :)

2. I think it's good they switched aled for Isaac in the tv adaption. Like do NOT get me wrong i ADORE aled. But his story goes far beyond heartstopper and it gave great room for aroace representation since sadly there isn't much representation for it. Also I would love a radio silence tv adaption AHHH.

3. I saw this post a little while back from someone on tumblr saying that they think nick and Charlie would try propose on the same day but one of them would go first and the other would be like "I WAS JUST ABOUT TO PROPOSE TO YOU?!" and I thought it was so cute. But I like this too and it would make more sense for Charlie to propose first. GOD I hope we someday hear about who proposes to who because that would be so cute! Or have a mini comic called "the proposal" or something

4. OHH I COULD RAMBLE ON FOR HOURS ON END ABOUT THIS! I watched the new clip and I instantly thought "hell yeah, THATS Michael holden". He embodies him and hit his mannerisms on the nail. I hope to see him quite a bit this season.

Thankyou for the ask, sorry I rambled on and on I just love these unpopular opinions!! :)

#alice oseman #heartstopper #tori spring #osemanverse #michael holden #solitaire #charlie spring #solitaire alice oseman #tori and michael #girlblogger

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theharddeck · 2 years

Text

out of the blue, clear sky (chapter four) // Jake Seresin x Reader

Pairing: hangman x fem!reader (no y/n)

Synopsis: what's a bit of state rivalry between pilots? You and Hangman see each other in a new light after a late night at a dive bar

Warnings: 18+, minors please DNI -- this is a 5 chapter deal and this one is clinging to PG, but it'll ratchet up to E in the last chapter. In the interim, there's swearing, but yeah mostly flagging this because something smutty this way comes

Length: 3.6k

taglist: @peakyrogers @winterrebel04 @blue-aconite @bioodforbiood @kilojulietsierra @dempy @olliepig @double-j @blazinglioness @laracrofted @javihoney @amnmich @smoothdogsgirl @loveforaugust @desert-fern @fuckyeahhangman

A/N: Fun fact, i don’t have a callsign in mind for Kentucky. Like that’s what Jake calls her, but I don’t see it as her callsign? Anyways i think it’s sweet that that’s what we call her too, but just want to be clear that it’s not her callsign… idk why it matters. Also, yes Kaley’s name was originally Callie, then I realized we already have a Callie in canon so I changed it so i’m sorry/hope that wasn’t too confusing!

chapter one / chapter two / chapter three / chapter four / chapter five

You were proud of yourself for the fun you managed to have for the rest of the night.

It wasn’t even like there was anything to be morose over– a couple lingering looks, a few more-than-platonic touches? Nothing to get worked up over.

So you shelled out money for a couple more tickets and took a ride on the Ferris wheel with Phoenix and Bob and Payback. You crammed yourself into one of those swirling swing rides to convince Rooster it was safe, and played photographer so Harvard and Fritz could have content for their instagrams. You rolled your eyes when Coyote and Fanboy sauntered back to the group with phone numbers written on their forearms in lipstick, and told the group of you they’d meet you back on base. The evening lengthened in a swirl of old Katy Perry songs over loudspeakers and raucous screams from rides that weren’t even that scary, and finally the group of you decided it was time to call it a night.

It wasn’t until everyone split off in the parking lot that you remembered who’d driven you, and who wasn’t going to be with you on the drive back.

You and Jake were silent on the walk to the truck, and you snuck a glance at him in the moonlight. He didn’t seem withdrawn, per se, and had come back to the group right after you had. Maybe pensive was a good word, or maybe Hangman just always defaulted to vaguely intense, and you hadn’t caught him this late at night yet.

You didn’t realize he had come along to the passenger side until he was holding the door open for you, at which point it was too late for you to tell him not to worry about it. It seemed instinctual for him, like he didn’t recognize what he was doing until it was too late, either. His nose wrinkled slightly as he sniffed, looking over the roof of the car before back at you.

“Force of habit,” he said quietly, but he still held out a hand to help you up into the cab.

“Figured,” you said, as you took it, climbing up.

It was a perfectly chaste touch, and that felt worse than sparks. Sparks would mean something special, something extraordinary, but Jake’s hand felt like normal, like it could be familiar. You hugged the koala against your chest, trying to push away the sensation against the soft fur, as Jake walked around the front of the truck.

It was a quiet drive, and you appreciated that Jake rolled down the windows for some noise. It wasn’t as obvious as turning on the radio, but it did mean the silence wasn’t quite so loud.

The wind was cold, but you welcomed it. It’d keep you awake after the day, and you could focus on something other than the tense energy in the truck. The lights on the freeway blurred together, cars speeding by you, you speeding by cars, and as you got closer to base, Hangman flicked on the turn signal early. You didn’t look over, figuring there was a reason, and sure enough, he pulled the truck off the freeway and into a gas station some 20¢ cheaper than the other stations you’d been passing by.

“It’ll just be a sec,” Jake said, the moment the car was parked, and then he was out of it, checking the pump number before walking quickly towards the convenience store to prepay.

You pulled out your phone and flipped through pictures you’d taken over the course of the night.

Phoenix, Coyote, you, and Rooster, all in an exaggerated sorority squat, your callsigns painted along your cheekbones.

Bob pouting with a demolished cotton candy cone.

Halo and Harvard high-fiving on the backs of horses on a merry-go-round.

You were startled out of your browsing by the vibrating sound of a phone ringing. You frowned at your phone, still silent, and then looked across the bench seat, to where Hangman’s phone was ringing.

You planned to turn it off, just to stop the leather from vibrating, but the name on the screen made you pause for a moment – Kaley Seresin.

Shoot.

You leaned across the seat to see if Jake was on his way back, but he was in line, with one more person between him and the register. You considered running it in to him, but it’d probably time out by the time you made it in, in which case, you’d just hand him a quiet phone, the same way you’d tell him he missed a call when he got back to the truck.

It rang out.

Only to start ringing again. You figured maybe you should run it in, but when you looked back at the store, Jake was at the register, chatting easily with the person behind the counter. The phone rang, then rang out and you held your breath for a moment, before it started ringing again.

Damn it.

“I’m so sorry; Jake’s not here right now,” you said into the receiver. “He’s getting gas and he left his phone in the car; he’ll be right back, and I’ll hand it over to him, I just felt bad that it was going to keep ringing.”

The line was quiet.

A long moment passed, and you pulled the phone away from you ear to see if you’d missed it a third time and it’d gone on to voicemail, but the line was still connected.

“Hello?” you asked again, putting it back to your ear.

“So, what,” a voice said, much younger than you expected, “are you his girlfriend or something?”

You winced, closing your eyes. “Tyler?” you guessed.

Another beat.

“How do you know my name?” the boy asked, voice wavering between suspicious and pleased.

“Your Uncle won’t shut up about you,” you said, figuring the kid would respond better to that than outright flattery. He hummed, considering.

“Well, his life’s pretty boring,” he said. “Just work and stuff.”

You smiled, in spite of yourself, amused by a teenager who thought hurtling million-dollar aircraft through the troposphere as just work.

“Between you and me,” you said drily, trusting that more than whatever conspiratorial airs people tended to put on around children, “he could use a life.”

The kid snorted, then he seemed to think of something. “Are you a pilot too, then?”

“I am, yeah,” you said. “But I promise, I’m much cooler.”

The door to the convenience store swung open and you waved for Jake to come over as soon as he stepped outside. He frowned at you, slightly, looking over his shoulder before waving back at you uncertainly.

You bit back a curse for the sake of underage listeners, and rolled your eyes giving up.

“Where are you from?” Tyler asked. “You talk funny.”

That was fair.

“A little place called Bardstown,” you said.

“Bardstown?” he repeated dutifully.

“It’s the second oldest city in Kentucky,” you told him, like that was even remotely interesting. “We have 11 distilleries within 16 miles of the court square.”

You tapped on the glass as Jake walked by, but he held up a placating hand, like he was going as fast as he could. He walked around to the back of the truck and flipped open the gas cap, starting to fill up the tank.

You sighed, settling back into the seat. “Your uncle’s ignoring me,” you informed Tyler. “I want the record to show that I tried to be a good operator and hand over the call as soon as I could.”

“S’okay,” he said, and you could practically see him shrugging. “What kind of distilleries?”

“Bourbon,” you said, wondering if you were the peer pressure parents warned their kids about. “Uh, but there’s an African American heritage museum in town, too. And a train museum and a couple old churches, so, like, edifying stuff.”

“You probably should’ve led with that, huh?” he asked, and you went back to petting the koala.

“Yeah probably. Hey, Tyler, any good names for a koala?”

“A real one?”

“What?” you scoffed. “Buddy, I just told you I’m a pilot.”

“Eh, I guess,” Tyler said, sounding disappointed. “Can you even have a koala here? Is that, like, legal?”

“Pretty sure it’s illegal everywhere,” you told him.

“That sucks. So why do you have a not-real koala?”

“That’s a great question,” you muttered, before shaking your head. “Regardless, it’s like two feet tall and very soft, and it needs a name.”

He was quiet for a moment.

“Wilson,” he decided.

You tilted your head at the koala; that’d do.

“I like it,” you told him. “Like from Cast Away?”

“What?” he sighed. “No, like Captain America.”

“Is that my phone?”

You jumped when you realized Jake had opened the truck door, leaning in from where he was still pumping gas.

“Is that my Uncle?” Tyler asked.

“Yep,” you said to Tyler, realizing it answered both of their questions. Into the phone you said, “Now that we’ve finally got his attention, I’m gonna hand you over now, but it was nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, you too,” he said. “I won’t tell him about the bourbon thing.”

“You’re a gentleman and a scholar,” you told him, then held out the phone to Jake.

“Did you answer my phone?” he whispered, and you held out the phone emphatically, telling him to take it. His mouth twitched and he hit mute on it, raising his eyebrows and waiting for an answer.

“It rang like 17 times,” you whispered back, even though the line was technically muted. “I planned to just send it to voicemail then I saw Kaley’s name and then it’s Tyler so I didn’t want to just be like ‘yeah he’ll call you back’, so I–”

Jake put the phone up to his ear. “Hey, ace,” he said and it was your turn to raise your eyebrows at the way he pitched his voice, sounding almost friendly.

He made a face at you, leaning out the door and shutting it while he finished pumping the gas.

“Uh, yeah, I don’t know,” he said, his voice getting louder as he turned back to look at you, and you calmly fluffed Wilson’s hair in one direction, “I think it’s a weird saying from some great American novel or something.”

“Catcher in the Rye,” you muttered, not that he was listening. “Salinger’s grandad was a rabbi in Kentucky, by the way.”

“No, she’s not my—” There was a bang, and Jake shut the cap cover. “Well, she’s not. Look, was there a reason you called?”

You elected to ignore the first part of his response, instead enjoying the duality of Jake’s interaction with his nephew. His voice was callous, but there was an undercurrent of deep care, that you were sure the kid could feel across the line.

Jake fed the gas nozzle back into the stand, wiping his hands on his jeans before he got back into the truck.

“Okay, fair, I’ll text your mom back,” he said, holding the phone against his shoulder and rubbing his hands together, cold from the pump. You were wondering if you should get out of the truck to give him a minute, when Jake reached down to start the engine.

“No, no, I appreciate it,” he said. “What do I always tell you?”

The truck was quiet for a moment, as Jake waited for a response.

“Damn straight,” he said, after a beat. “Even if it’s midnight out there, okay? You call me, I’ll answer.”

The moment was sweet, suspended, and when you looked over at Jake, you saw something simple on his face. When he felt the weight of your eyes, he sat up a little straighter, clearing his throat.

“And if I’m not around,” he said calmly, “I’ll get my secretary to pick up for me again.”

You swung Wilson without preamble, and Jake lifted an arm to protect his face, laughing to himself.

“Yeah, don’t worry, she heard and she’s mad,” he chuckled into the phone. “Okay, tell your mom I’ll text her your grandma’s address as soon as I’m back at the base. Speaking of which, I’ve got to drive us there, so I’m gonna hang up.”

He paused, waiting for the kid to say something, and he looked over at you.

“He wants to know if you actually like the name Wilson,” he said, and you nodded honestly before Jake lifted his hands in exasperation, making a face that couldn’t be seen through the phone. “Well, how was I supposed to know that?? You said to ask her, and you expected me to just telepathically know, when you said—Okay, I’m hanging up now. Yep, okay. Okay. Okay. Yeah, love you too, ace. Bye.”

Jake hung up the phone and tossed it into the cup holder, pushing the truck into gear and easing her out of the gas station. As the fluorescent lights faded, you glanced over at him. The coming and going streetlights lit him like roving spotlights on intervals, and he squinted through them like he was on an Old Hollywood red carpet.

“What?” he asked.

You pressed your lips together, caught. “Ace is a cute nickname,” you said.

Jake smiled, an easy, fond thing. “He’s the tops,” he said, with honesty in his voice, and you felt your heart flip at the quaint expression.

He looked over at you, and you looked away quickly.

You weren’t far from the base, but this silence was lighter than it’d been most of the night. Jake guided the truck into the lot, parking it with a row of other trucks near the back, where they’d have more room to back in or out of spots.

You pulled Wilson back into your lap when the engine shut off. Jake shifted in the seat, and you felt him look over at you before getting out of the car, jogging around the front of it to get your door.

Now why’d he have to do something like that, when you were determined to bury this clearly fruitless crush?

But you smiled your thanks when he opened it, ducking under his arm and hauling Wilson with you. You waited for him to close the door behind you and moved to step around him, but were stopped by a hand on your side.

You looked down, surprised, and Jake’s hand dropped a moment later. He turned slowly, deliberately, so his back was to his truck and you could walk by if you wanted. You weren’t caged in, you could leave, walk up to the barracks and not look back.

But you couldn’t.

When you looked up at him, he was leaning back, his back against the truck now, like he needed the clear air above his head, and he rubbed a hand along the back of his neck before he looked back at you.

“I don’t know how to do this,” he said, quiet.

Your pulse jumped, but you ordered it to be steady, drawing in a calm breath and lifting your chin to meet his eyes.

“What part?” you asked.

He opened his mouth, then closed it. He looked at you, and a hand came up to push at the rim of your baseball cap, just slightly so it tilted up. His finger trailed from the cap down the side of your face and you tried not to shiver at the lightness of his touch. Or maybe it wasn’t the touch, is was the emerald intensity in his eyes as they followed his hand down your face, curving under your jaw before he pushed himself away from the truck.

He was moving slowly, so slowly, and you knew he was giving you time to move, but you didn’t want time, and when his finger crooked your chin up just a little more, you surged up on your toes, pressing your lips against his.

In an instant, his hand slid from your chin to the side of your face, holding your jaw to pull you towards him. His mouth was soft, gentler than you’d expected, and as he brushed his lips over yours, he tasted like cotton candy. Your lifted a hand, your fingers settling around the wrist of the hand that framed your face, and you could feel his pulse pounding inside his wrist. You felt him pull in a slow breath against your cheek, and he pulled back a bit.

Because of your hat, he couldn’t rest his forehead against yours, but he didn’t let go of your face, his thumb stroking across your cheek.

“Not that part,” he said, his voice low, and you felt your ears heat. His eyes flicked over your face as you blushed, harder to see in the low light and over the tan of your skin, but he saw it all the same, and his hand fell from your face as he pulled you into his arms.

You tucked your head into his chest, Wilson squished between the two of you, but Jake didn’t seem to mind. He shifted slightly, and you felt him press a kiss on the side of your hat, before his chin settled on top of it.

Your nose wrinkled at the silliness of the gesture, but it didn’t stop the warm feeling spreading through your chest. His arms felt steady around you, in the shadows of the parking lot, and you felt him draw in a deep breath.

“That George Strait song, at karaoke,” he said, words hesitant but carefully chosen, like your kiss had given him enough certainty to push through whatever he had to say, “I didn’t realize it until it was too late, when I was walking over to you, and I couldn’t stop…I thought singing it like a joke would be almost as good as telling you.”

For a moment, you wondered if maybe you’d gotten whiplash on one of the rides you’d gone on tonight; there was no way Jake was saying what you were thinking he was saying.

“I get carried away by the look, by the light in your eyes. Before I even realize the ride I'm on, baby, I'm long gone. I get carried away; nothing matters but being with you and, like a feather flying high up in the sky on a windy day, I get carried away.”

You pulled back slightly, to look up at him, and he loosened his arms to let you go. “Why wouldn’t you just tell me?” you asked, no reprimand in your voice, just wanting to know.

“What, are you kidding?” he asked back, his voice just as quiet, then he shook his head, a smile pulling at his lips, but his brow furrowing. “You’re like cartoonishly good.”

You frowned. “What happened to “I’m very good,” energy?”

“That’s different,” Jake said, like it was obvious.

“You’re saying I’m a bad pilot?” you teased, not wanting to go down the path of comparison in another sense.

“That’s not what I said,” Jake said hastily, then he sighed. “I just mean you’re like Bob-levels of Nice Person.”

“I notice you don’t compare me to another pilot,” you muttered, not actually upset about it, but clinging to that vein of conversation.

Apparently Jake wouldn’t be deterred either.

“You wake up early to make coffee for the whole squad,” he said. “You always sit on the left, so that Fritz has desk space for that left-handed notebook of his.”

You blinked; you weren’t sure how he noticed that.

“That’s efficiency,” you said. “I’m up anyways and nobody wins if people’s notes are crowded off the table.”

“You got us all organized to send that card and flowers to Mav after the anniversary of Ice’s passing.”

“It was Rooster’s idea, and you know it,” you said, and Jake looked like he was going to keep going, which you weren’t going to just stand here and accept.

“Literally just today,” you said, “you sent Fanboy in to get me on the pretense of needing a sweater so Halo wouldn’t feel like anyone forgot the excursion she’s been waiting on for weeks.”

Jake’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah, well–”

“You leave the lights on in the hallway for when Coyote and Harvard come in late.”

“They’re too noisy if I don’t,” he mumbled, like that could convince you he wasn’t waiting up to check that his friends made it in safe, as if Coyote hadn’t told you months ago.

“You made yourself a sure thing for your nephew,” you continued. “This kid across the country who knows he can call you, any time of the day, and you’ll be there for him.”

Jake shook his head. “That’s not the same.”

“You’re right,” you nodded. “But it’s caring, Jake; it looks different on everybody. We do the best we can, we hope it’s enough, and maybe, if we’re lucky, someone notices.”

You were both silent for a moment, stubborn and determined, eyes searching each others’ in the parking lot. Jake looked away first, clearing his throat.

“Do you feel lucky?” he asked, in a voice uncertain enough that you could cry.

You wouldn’t, but you could, could break down in tears over the man who seemed determined to convince everyone he was callous and soulless, but was really so terrified of hurting someone.

“I do,” you said, simply. “I do, yeah.”

You thought Jake might kiss you again, but instead he just pulled you back into his arms, tighter than before. You went easily, the arm that wasn’t holding Wilson snaked around his waist to hug him back.

You could feel Jake’s cheek resting on top of your hat, and his hands were clutched on your back—not caressing or soothing, just holding, needing this more than both of you had expected. So you smoothed your hand up his back and nestled your face into his chest. One of Wilson’s paws was digging into your stomach, and you would bet that Jake would have stitch-marks from the rim of your hat on his cheek, when you both let go. And there were still questions to be answered, explanations to be had, but you stayed there, in the cold, a little more certain than the last time you’d stood in this lot.

It’d been a long time of waiting.

You could wait a little longer.

next chapter

#jake hangman seresin #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin x you #hangman x you #hangman x reader #hangman fanfiction #jake hangman seresin fanfiction #i have zero patience and so i'm posting this now #pls don't let it flop lol

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jmrothwell · 1 year

Note

“i said i love you, you heard me.” “oh i know, i just want to hear you say it again.” for Sweet Tarts!

This sucked. This job was supposed to be Carrie’s retreat and chance to get away from everything. Enjoy the beauty of nature and all that.

Instead she was stuck keeping an eye on the cabin’s while everyone else went on the big celebratory end of summer camp hike and picnic because she’d gone and severely twisted her ankle. So here she sat in the bunk of her cabin. Foot elevated on a stack of pillows while she fiddled with the two-way radio Reggie left behind.

Reggie had actually offered to stay with her. After he offered to carry her the whole 5 mile hike out to the picnic site and back again. Both of which she rejected. Her ankle didn’t need to also ruin his final few days.

Didn’t mean she was any less bored all alone like she was. Or that she secretly wished she had accepted his offer to stay. He’d been the biggest surprise of this whole experience and it could have been nice to get some time together, just the two of them.

She glared down at the radio in her hand, checking the volume settings probably for the fifteenth time in the past five minutes. And just like every other time before it was on and at a decent volume level.

So why had it been silent ever since everyone left?

“Reggie? You there?” She asked through the radio and was met by silence.

Reasonably Reggie could have his hands full. A few of those kids were energetic speed demons and daredevils with no sense of self preservation.

It’d be better to let him work if that were the case. He’d get back to her when he was able.

“Reggie?”

“Hey Carrie. You all good? Over.” Reggie said through the radio. His voice made the corners of her mouth twitch upward, though she could easily do without the worried tone.

“I’m fine.” She said, adjusting herself so she was sitting, back propped against the wall and holding her pillow in her lap. “You don’t need to sound so worried.”

“Oh. Sorry, I guess. Why are you…calling? Is this calling? Yeah, calling. Why are you calling? Over.”

“Dork, you left the radio for me in the first place. I’ve been waiting for you to call me first.”

“Oh, sorry about that. I got a little caught up. Over.”

“Yeah I figured.” She rolled her eyes and bit back her smile as she pictured the blush that must be breaking out across his face.

“Carrie, you need to say ‘over’ when you’re done talking or I won’t know if you’re done. Over.”

“You seemed to understand I was done perfectly fine.”

“Carrie.” Reggie whined, holding out the vowels in her name and causing her to giggle in spite of her foul mood when he followed it with a quick lighthearted. “Over.”

“Fine, fine. How’s the hike going?” She said, before adding her own exaggerated and purposefully over enunciated. “Over.”

“Well, Brydon is convinced he’s discovered a new kind of rock, Charlotte keeps needing to be reminded to not pick the flowers, and Max nearly joined you in the twisted ankles club. Over.”

“Sounds about right for them. If you need help let Chalotte know I still have some pink glitter cord we can make bracelets with later, but only if she leaves nature where it’s meant to stay. Over.”

Reggie laughed. “I’ll pass the message on. Over.”

“What about you? How are you holding up? Over.”

“There’s been a lot I’ve wanted to show you. Kind of wish I brought my camera with me. Maybe we can just come back together later, when your ankle is feeling better. Over.”

He wanted to spend time with her, just the two of them, as well. Carrie hugged the pillow tighter to her chest to counter the feeling of her heart pounding. “God, I love him.” She said out loud, a little shocked to hear herself say it.

Although that shock was nothing compared to realizing that she’d also held down the button to speak on the radio when she had. A simple twitch of muscle since she’d gotten used to the movement during their short conversation.

“The signal cut out, repeat last. Over.”

It was the perfect opportunity to pretend she hadn’t said it. But, well, just because she couldn’t enjoy the lake and woods like she wanted didn’t mean she had to completely deprive herself of things she enjoyed. To hell with ‘but isn’t that too fast?’ What was life without an occasional risk?

“I said I love you.” Carrie repeated over the radio, recognizing the smug tone of Reggie's request a beat too late. She groaned. “You heard me. Over”

“Oh, I know.” he laughed back and she was glad no one else was in the room to have to hide her blush from. “I just wanted to hear you say it again. I love you, too.”

Carrie hid her face behind her hand in spite of herself. Her laugh bubbled out of her chest as he called back over the radio.

“Carrie? You still there?”

“Oh. I’m sorry. I was waiting for someone to say ‘over,’ over.” She laughed, maybe a little smug.

“Well played. I deserved that.” He laughed, before he let out an exhausted groan. “I gotta go. Parker is trying to scale an oak tree. We’ll talk more later? Over.”

“Can’t wait. Over.”

“Me neither. Over and out.”

#JatP Sweet Tarts #julie and the phantoms fanfiction #reggie x carrie

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horsegamesins-old · 1 year

Text

Just a story with my sso oc and her horse, I might continue this but no promises

The sun rose over the tall trees of Mistfall, warming the dewkissed grass and mossy stones. Songbirds slowly broke the early morning silence with a ballad for a new day, and soon again the woods were full of life. I had always loved mornings like this, when I could just sit in silence until the world caught up to us again.

The kettle let out an angry wheeze, signaling the water was ready for coffee. A brief stretch later I got up again and took the kettle off the campfire, then put my frying pan on the grill. "Now.. What to make for breakfast", I muttered to myself, trying to remember what I had remaining from last week. "There's a few eggs left, perfect."

I had just finished my breakfast when the static of my radio hissed on. "Sparrowhawk. Sparrowhawk, do you copy?" I fumbled a little trying to get the walkie-talkie off my belt, "This is Sparrowhawk, loud and clear sir. Over." "We have a report of a lost rider and horse somewhere in the deeper Wildwoods. Can you help us on the search? Over", I grabbed Quicksilver's neck rope and my bags while he was talking. "Copy that, where were they last seen? Over", I respond. "According to the source, they left Firgrove yesterday afternoon in order to cross the Northern Gorge before nightfall. They were headed to a town east of Wildwoods but she has since lost contact with them. Over." My heart dropped when I heard that. I hesitated a little before responding. "Copy that. Sparrowhawk, over and out." Two long and two short whistles, our emergency call. Hopefully Quicksilver would show up soon, but while I still had time it was best to restock my saddlebags. My gut told me this was gonna be a long ride.

After packing extra rations I heard the sound of familiar hoofsteps approaching. Quicksilver rustled out of the bushes just as I turned to greet him. "I came as soon as I could", my friend said. It was obvious he was a bit out of breath from galloping here on such a short notice. "Thank you", I pat him on the neck and offer him an apple, "Sorry to wake you, the rangers called me. It's serious". Quicksilver perked his ears at me, busy chewing on his apple. "Someone's lost in the woods, they might be at the Northern Gorge." I could see him stiffen as I said that. "You're kidding, right?" Quicksilver whispered and finished his treat as quickly as possible. Meanwhile I fetched his tack from the fence and laid the saddle on his back "No, we need to leave right now", I muttered while tightening the girths. Once I was done Quicksilver walked over to the rocks to wait while I put my jacket on, and I wasted no time getting on. "They left from Firgrove, let's see if you can find their tracks." "On it, boss!" he snorted, and we took off. part 2

Sidenote for anyone who read this far, I am open to critique about my writing but please keep it civil. This is also the first time in a long time I have written anything that isn't either Warriors rp or Hetalia fanfiction so I have no idea what I'm doing.

#sso #star stable online #sso oc #sso writing #ssoblr #al's sso ocs

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havethetouch · 2 years

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life update

Soooo thing are funky over on my end. A bit. I mean go figure I am trying to sort through my fathers stuff so I can make room for my own and it's been... going. 'S like some stuff goes in the bins (like shoes or socks) and then I grab one ratty shirt and know when he wore it the last time and it takes me back and it's nice but hard and soft n shit. I am glad to have the pressure of needing to move in behind me it keeps me focused. I guess all of that would be harder under normal circustances but I don't do normal so its fine-ish.

Had a situation come up in the fam yesterday because of course we do but it's like the brother of my sworn sister who we got to worry about here which as fucked as it sounds, ain't as bad as all thenother stuff prior. At least here we have a plan and know what to do and nobody died and yes my baseline for maybe freaking out a bit is at this point death and after handeling so many I look at every other problem like something that does not require much panics and stress bc we gonna handle that we got this and everything will be alright.

Which, mind, is a good way to look at shit all things considered.

Anyway I have not yet had the time to move my computer, scanner and stuff I always fill up a luggage when I am at the flat and take stuff with me like some packrat. Still need to check if someone is available to help with furniture and stuff but my aim is to have my stuff cleared out completly by the end of March.

Sorry for the radio silence this move wasn't really planned yet like I stated before but it's a thing now and I gotta roll with that.

On another note, house is slowly getting warmer, it hasn't been heated for a while especially not through winter except for where the waterpipes are and the walls are thick, it was a bit funny having my first workday in a house that had 10.5 degrees I was bundled up with my coffee cup in hands but it was a good morning and good day.

I assumed wrongly that being there would be hard for me, and I mean it is when I go through the stuff of our deceased that has been stored there but it... it already feels like home? Home for me was always more tied to people close to me and living seperate from my sworn sister who is still home to me, seemed a bit wild and unfathomable weeks ago but we both do alright and this house... this house can be home to and I am so glad.

I'm also thankful for my aunt next door (the house is halved basically, we share the attic and have a backdoor connecting our properties) bc having her (and her husband) just a few steps away does help and she feeds me too which is a huge bonus bc I don't have the energy to cook properly and she has a routine going that does help with me not forgetting to eat in general as I'm wont to do.

So all in all, busy days, not always easy but in general things are looking up fine on my end is what I meant to say with all this.

#Touch speaks #life update

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metablood · 2 years

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Flufftober 2022 #2 You told your grandma ? with EraserMic

You can read it on AO3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/42310992/chapters/106244613

Not rated, 1844 words, hurt/confort.

For once, Hizashi is having a quiet evening. All his student English papers have been graded, next playlist for Put Your Hands Up Radio is done, their cats Melonpan and Mochi are both well fed and resting on his laps. Shouta is visiting his grandma, which means he doesn’t need to worry about his safety, no patrol tonight!

He chose a cooking show. While being very fond of them, his skills on the matter are not improving, so he ordered noodles from Haru’s. Maybe that’s because the shows focus more on spectacular technics and competition drama than actual cooking… Shouta is more a fan of the Gordon Ramsey show. His evil grin widening when the angry chef starts yelling.

Mochi, the younger cat, suddenly raises his head, staring at the door. That usually means the delivery man is about to knock! Hizashi gets up, but before he can reach it, the door opens, and a soaked Shouta comes in. He squats in the entrance, his back resting on the door, and stares at his shoes, but won’t untie them. His wavy hair is dripping on the blue and white tiles. His civil clothes, simple jeans and black T-shirt, are also soaked, like he walked the whole way from Nahurata to here.

Shou?... I don’t know if you are not talking, or if I cannot hear you.

Hizashi had been hard of hearing since his early childhood, as his quirk activated at birth, while his eardrums were not ready for such a shock. Shouta’s bass voice is usually easier for him to hear, and his diction impeccable. So the Voice Hero usually puts down his hearing aids when he gets home to have some rest from the parasite noises and buzz. Plus, Shouta started to learn JSL as soon as his first year at UA, shortly after meeting his soulmate.

I… (then he remembers to raise his head and look at Hizashi), I’m sorry. I’m coming. I think I had a bit of a panic attack… and I kept walking as fast as I could instead of taking the subway home.

Alright then, just classic Shouta behavior. I was afraid you got hurt on your way home. Naruhata is getting weird those days…

Rumors about a new drug gave Eraser Head and Tsukauchi extra work those last few weeks. But the investigation gave no result so far.

Shouta slowly gets up and rid of his wet clothes. His blond partner moves toward the kitchen and put the kettle on. He brews herbal tea for himself, and a black coffee for Shouta with the French press. For some reason this man cannot go to bed without his evening coffee… And French Press is the system that liberates the most caffein in a single cup. Is it the reason French people are so angry all the time?

Shouta reappears in the living room wearing his favorite pajamas: pink track pants and an oversized black tank top. The last one, showing a lot of shoulders, usually drives Hizashi a bit crazy. But tonight, Shouta looks like he’s been hit by the metaphorical truck. He crashes on the couch with a heavy sigh. The blond comes to him with both cups, and attempts a kiss on the chick, that’s welcomed by a low grunt.

One of those nights, I see…

No cuddles, I fear… I kinda… I almost had a fight with Nona…

I beg your pardon?

Oh, we used to fight a lot, when I was younger… and dumber…

Yeah but… I thought things were better now?

It was… But you know how some topics are off limit.

Just tell me what happened then.

Shouta’s hair hides his face as he leans toward his coffee, both hands wrapped around the mug, eyes closed, to enjoy the smell of freshly grounded beans. He always had a hard time speaking out about conflict and feelings. Hizashi learned to give him time, and, as hard as it is for him, let the silence set in. After a while, Shouta raises his head again:

She was talking about neighborhood gossip. Mostly about her friends’ children and grandchildren, what they do for work, who they date, who is getting married. I just let her speak, I genuinely thought she just wanted to chat about it. Then her voice changed, and she asked, “what about you?”

Ho…

I asked, “what about what?” and maybe it came out rude, I don’t know… but she sighed and threw her hands in the air like I said something stupid. She said “You’re still living with a roommate, when are you going to grow up and find a nice girlfriend?”

Well… she didn’t bring up this topic for a long time…

And that’s why we were happy and not fighting anymore!

That couldn’t last for long… You’ll eventually have to come out to her…

I don’t understand why she would need me too! She won’t like it anyway!

But right now, she thinks you are lonely, that’s why she keeps talking about it.

Only because her definition of “happy” is doing the same things the children of her friends did. Anyway, why do you take her side?

I don’t! You said you didn’t understand her, so I come up with what I think are her reasons… I don’t say she’s right! She just has a different perspective… plus she doesn’t have the whole story!

Right! And that’s why I seriously considered telling her. So I can cut out with all the secrets and bullshit “roommate” situation.

Oh dear…

And then I wondered about her reaction… and then I wondered what would happen if I did. And… suddenly I couldn’t speak at all. But she kept talking and talking about this neighbor, this cousin, someone else’s wedding… She always talks about what everybody else is doing. She used to be proud of me you know?

I guess she still is…

She has a funny way to show it. For a while, she was happy to have bragging rights about me getting into UA, and getting into the hero course… She was not that happy when I chose to become an underground hero, it’s hard to brag about that…

I guess right now all your former schoolmates are getting married, or having kids…

Right, everyone but me. And I don’t know what would hurt her more: thinking I chose to be single for life, or knowing I’m gay.

I don’t know either… she never said anything hurtful in front of me, and I’ve been openly bi for a while, on live TV and radio.

Because you are not her only grandson. She’s not like one of those awful anti-lgbt activist who try to make everybody miserable. But she’s not exactly an ally either. The things she’s said while watching tv with me… when the news talked about the Pride, or when there’s a gay character on her tv shows… She wouldn’t dare say that in someone’s face. But I know her true colors know. And they are not freaking rainbow!

… so, what do you want to do ?

What I want, is not to lose her. She’s my only family.

Ignorance is bliss, they say…

What happened to being proud?

I cannot tell you how to deal with your family. I have supportive parents, and a gay uncle who always supported me. I have no idea how things would have turn out without them…

Maybe you would be all gloomy, smoking too much, and fighting with your grandma…

And I would use coffee as a therapy, and use a capture weapon as a blanky?

Hizashi’s tea is resting on the table, cold. Shouta clings to his cup. The cats, acting as stress detectors, are glued to his side, purring to their maximum capacity. When it comes to his family, Shouta tends to avoid conflict, make himself scarce or straight up disappear for months. His grandma basically raised him, and there’s no way Shouta will ever confront her on that topic. That would be opening Pandora’s box. He would have to deal with the reality he has been wondering about for years. “Would she still love me if…”.

Shouta’s lids are fluttering, but his mind keeps him awake with anxiety.

Shou… we are not finding a solution to this problem tonight… you need to sleep.

I need to have a solution to this problem SO I can sleep.

Hizashi keeps an eye on him for the rest of the night. When Shouta slightly leans on a side of the couch, he puts a heavy blanket on him. 5 minutes later, he can hear him snoring. It was a logical ruse! There’s no reason Eraser Head would me the only one to use them!

A few weeks later, Shouta decided that it was not logical to cling at a conditional love and came out to his grandma. He didn’t let Hizashi accompany him in case she would be mean. He later described the conversation that followed as “a shipwreck”. She cried, yelled, had a one-way conversation with God, yelled more, asked what she did wrong… Eventually Shouta found 3 seconds of silence to interject that he’s happy as he is, that he’s not sick, has a loving partner and… Nona yelled some more.

After a few hours of yelling, Shouta decided that it was not logical to try to speak with someone unwilling to listen.

Hizashi planned a sweet escape vacation with Midnight and Tensei acting as emotional support friends. It showed that brooding over one’s Mojito on the beach is healthier for Shouta than brooding over his coffee at 3 in the morning on the couch.

After a few weeks of acting like the sky fell on her head and Shouta didn’t exist anymore, Nona Aizawa decided it was not logical to lose her only grandchild over something none of them can change.

It took a long time, finding her an LGBT-supporting church, watch 5 seasons of One Day at a Time, long talks over high quality coffee…

She ended up admitting Shouta and her are far more alike that she would admit. She left her family at 16 over a fight about the man she would marry. She took typing lessons so she could get a job, while it was frowned upon at the time. She refused to come back home without an apology from her mother.

You found him, your soulmate, right?

Yes, I did.

Nothing anyone could say would change that, right?

Nothing.

I loved your grandfather, you know that…

I do.

I… won’t make things more difficult anymore. My mother made the mistake with me, then I drove your mother away…

She did make some decisions herself…

You are kind…

Don’t tell that to anyone, I have a reputation to maintain!

What about my reputation as an old-school catholic grandma, now that my grandson is engaged to a flamboyant DJ?

Well, are you going to harass us about adopting many grand kids?

Of course, I will!

And then, the EraserMic family adopted many, many problem children, the end.

#erasermic #eraseric fluff #fufftober 2022 #AO3 #mha fanfiction #fanfiction #aizawa shouta #hizashi yamada #FlufftoberMetablood #flufftober2022

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galactiquest · 2 years

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Wow, it's almost been two years since I last posted on this self-ship/self-insert blog.

Some people might think I moved on from the whole self-ship thing, and, well, I haven't. I've still got a laundry list of kissable characters, that'll probably never change. I've been posting on other platforms, which has been easier than keeping a consistent blog up (I was really struggling with consistency in 2020, now that I'm a bit more... stable, I could probably achieve that on a blog).

I think the real reason I stopped this blog is because of the expectations of a good chunk of the self-ship community.

Now, I get it. The idea of self-ship in general may be kind of "cringe" to the average joe (but I could also say that most anyone has done it if they ever had fantasies as a teenager). It's hard to be out and open about it. But there's a huge divide between getting requests for writing and actually communicating with peers.

I'll level with anyone who wasn't aware--reigenquest used to be part self-ship, part request taking (it was under a different user back then) and I got requests on the daily. I think the most I ever got was 20-30 requests sitting in my ask box at once. Do you know how many times people asked about myself, about my own self-ships...?

A few times. I've had maybe two people maximum, who I did not know beforehand(!) who were willing to ask me about my journey, my story, even indulge me in a few fantasies. And, of course, the occasional friend who was also somewhat involved in self-shipping who would indulge me right back.

There's a lot of give-and-take in this community. But I felt like I was giving so much, and not getting very much back at all. Anyone here remember that F/O takeover day? I got, maybe, three asks maximum from that day. And I had to beg for it. At first I got no asks, because I wasn't taking requests.

It really ate away at my passion for the blog. I wanted to use reigenquest as a way to connect with the community in a semi-anonymous way, even discuss self-ships with others even if they wanted to hide behind an anonymous ask. But no one wanted to hear about me... and it hurt!

So, let's level.

Hi, my name is Jason, or you may have seen the nickname Host on some websites. I'm 20 years old. I'm working on a degree in Computer Science. And I am so full of love for so many characters that it's hard to keep track of...

I'm thinking I'm going to refresh this blog, since I finally have the energy to do so, but this time I'm hoping that maybe the community will ask to connect with me a little more. This blog is just shy of 500 followers (quite a lot for me!) and a lot of them are leftover from the days when I wrote for, ah... a certain fandom I kinda sorta don't want to be connected with anymore (it happens).

And to the few friends, or, well, just one friend I made through this blog--I'm sorry about the radio silence. I hope you've been well.

TL;DR: The self-ship community needs to take care of each other. It's difficult when you give scenarios, writing, etc. to others, but rarely get much back. Please please please just be kind to each other, even if you can only give a little back.

#text #yeah i forgot the tags for this blog but. yeah.#long post #and i really am sorry for the nearly 2 year radio silence #i'll probably start cleaning up this blog soon after this post uploads so... yeah

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watchmegetobsessed · 2 years

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FAMILY FIRST

A/N: our fav little family has had so many lovely fluffy fics, though i would take it to a bit more serious direction! also, i didn't want the week to pass without a new fic especially since i reached 11k followers which is just absolutely crazy!! so thank you so much for each and every one of you!!

PAIRING: husband!dad!Harry X Reader

SUMMARY: Harry is a great dad, but sometimes he messes it up and you have to remind him that family comes first.

WORD COUNT: 2.2k

MORE FROM THE ANOTHER ONE UNIVERSE | SUPPORT ME!

Harry knows your silence is worse than when you scream and shout at him. Whenever you give him radio silence he knows he fucked up, royally.

This week has been way more hectic than usually. Harry’s been traveling a lot lately, leaving you alone with the kids for days at a time and though you knew there would be times when he can’t be around as much as he usually does, with Leo here it’s even harder than before.

You have help, lots of it actually, Anne, Gemma and your parents are always happy to take over some babysitting duties and you have a trustin nanny as well, but you and Harry have always been the type of parents who like to do everything themselves. Your life is crazy enough already since you’re married to a celebrity, but especially because of that, you want your private everydays to be as normal as possible.

You’ve always been supportive when it came to Harry’s career, but you also made it very clear that you expect him to put his family first. And for most of the time he kept his promises he made to you about being a father first and then an artist.

However sometimes things pile up around him and he forgets his priorities.

He came home just yesterday from LA, his tan is a clear sign he’s been away from his home country. He has a few days at home until he needs to leave again, so it was obvious this time would be reserved for his family and daddy duties. Unfortunately some last minute work came up and he needed to meet up with Jeff and his team in the middle of his time off.

You rescheduled your plans and Anne offered to take care of the cooking which was supposed to be Harry’s task while you’re running errands. In the afternoon he promised to pick Ellie up from her dance class while you get the twins from school, and he was supposed to pick up your dresses from the dry cleaner as well since it was on his way to Ellie’s dance school. This plan left him almost the whole day to take care of whatever work just came up.

But it’s not at all how it happened.

You just got done at the supermarket, Leo strapped to your chest as you carried two bags full of groceries when you got a call from Ellie’s dance teacher.

“Y/N, hi! Sorry to bother, but are you coming to pick Ellie up today?” the teacher asks in the most polite way, but you can tell she’s worried too.

“Oh, my husband is supposed to pick her up, he’s not there yet?” you ask, checking the time and seeing her class has ended fifteen minutes ago.

“No, he hasn’t showed up yet.”

“Wow, okay, let me give him a call and I’ll get back to you, okay?” you sigh.

“Sure!”

You put Leo into his seat and then dial Harry’s number while leaving the parking lot. The line just rings and rings through the speakers since you have your phone connected to them, and then he never answers. You try again, but no luck this time either. You can already feel your headache throbbing since now you have to take care of everything on your own. You give Ellie’s teacher a callback, asking if she can stay there until you pick the twins up and make your way to the dance school. She says it’s fine, Ellie can join in on the class that’s just about to start and wait for you until you arrive. You thank her cooperation and drive just a tad bit faster than the usual to do everything Harry was supposed to do as well.

Harry knows he fucked up the moment he realizes how late it is when he finally leaves his meeting, two missed calls from you fifteen minutes after he was supposed to pick Ellie up. Only two, no more. Some people fear it when they have millions of missed calls, but Harry knows you don’t do that. You reach out once, then give it another go and then you take matters in your own hands.

It’s six thirty, Ellie’s dance class was over at five and the dry cleaner closes at six. He did not complete any of the tasks he was supposed to and he can’t even make up for any of them now.

He speeds down the roads like a maniac as he heads home, cursing under his breath continuously, knowing how badly he fucked up. Your car is already parked in the garage when he arrives and walking into the house he finds the kids finishing up their dinner while you’re feeding Leo from a bottle.

You don’t even look at him when he walks in, but the kids greet him with excitement as always, since they didn’t catch much of the mess-up he caused. The twins were picked up in time and Ellie had a blast joining in on another dance class until you arrived. You made it to the dry cleaners just in time as well, but because of the little extra trip you had to make you only got home about thirty minutes ago, quickly heated up the dinner Anne left for you out on the stove and dinner was exactly on time, luckily. But that doesn’t change the fact that you had to do it all by yourself.

“Daddy!” Maddy cheers and hopping off of her chair she runs up to hug him.

“Hi Princess, sorry I’m so late,” he breathes out, Picking the girl up into his arms and giving her a tight hug.

“Hi dad!” Ellie and Max greets him as well as they leave the table since they finished their dinner already.

“Hey, Y/N, I’m so sorry–” he starts, but you cut him off, still not looking at him.

“Guys, how about you go up to your rooms and pack your bags for tomorrow, hm?”

“Okay!” they sing in unison and you wait until their footsteps die down so that they are out of hearing range before finally looking at Harry.

He wants you to lash out on him, to tell him how badly he fucked up, to scream and shout, but you just give him a disappointed look and nothing else as you put Leo’s now empty bottle down and holding him on your chest you start burping him.

“Y/N, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to disappear, I just couldn’t leave that fucking meeting and when I looked at the time it was so late, I’m so sorry!”

Rocking around the kitchen, gently smacking Leo’s back you still remain silent and Harry is starting to panic. He hates your silence, as much as he deserves it, he could scream when you don’t talk to him.

“Please, baby, just say something!” he begs and you look at him again with that disappointed look that completely shatters his heart.

“You were not a dad today, Harry. You were Harry Styles, the singer, the star, but you were supposed to be my husband, my partner, the father to your kids. You made promises and you didn’t just not keep them, you left everything to me and didn’t even take the time to at least let me know.”

“I know, I’m so sorry, baby! I fucked up, so bad! I’m so so sorry!” Stepping closer he notices you don’t back away from him, but when he cups your face in his palm you don’t lean into his touch like you usually do and it’s like a slap across his face.

“I don’t need your apology. I need you to be there when we need you. We decided to start a family together and I told you in the beginning that I don’t want to feel like I’m a single mother. You promised to always put your family first and I accepted that sometimes you won’t be here. We have a support system, I’m not entirely alone, but when you don’t do the things you promise to, I can’t just make everyone stop what they are doing and help me. We are the parents of our kids, Harry. Before Anne, Gemma or my parents, or any nanny, we come first, we need to take care of them, but I can’t do it without you.”

Harry just stands there, completely destroyed, listening to your words, knowing you’re right. He knows he messed this one up badly and he needs to hear this from you.

“Four kids, Harry. We have four kids. Do you not realize how big of a responsibility is just one kid? And we have four, one of them is just a baby. A baby you begged me to have. And you know I love all of our children more than anything, but I did not sign up for this on my own. I need my partner, I need my husband, I can’t do this without you.”

Your eyes are now getting teared up, your lips trembling. You had to be on top of your game earlier with the kids, but now you’re realizing just how this situation made you feel. Before having Ellie it was one of your biggest fears that one day you’d be left alone with all the parent duties because of Harry’s career. Now, you know it won’t happen, but in times like this you can’t help but feel like he is shifting into the wrong direction.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry, Y/N. This was… I just got lost for a moment, but I know I’m a father and husband first, I want to be that first! Everything else… it doesn’t matter if I don’t have you and the kids. I would give it all up for our family, I love you guys more than anything and I promise it will never happen again!”

Now he is crying too, he pulls you into his arms, Leo still in your hold and this time you lean against him willingly, the tough act is already gone.

“I don’t want you to give it up. I would never ask you that, I just want you to be present when you’re with us, so I can rely on you.”

“I will. And I’m so sorry I disappointed you today. And thank you for being the most amazing woman I know. You always take care of our family, even when I’m being a wanker.”

You laugh through your tears as you adjust the babbling baby in your arms, who has no idea about the conversation that just went down in his presence.

“You really was a wanker today. I wanted to punch you so badly when Ellie’s dance teacher called me,” you tell him, but the anger is now gone, you just want to load it all out on him.

“You know what? Do it. Hit me, I deserve it.”

“Shut up,” you roll your eyes laughing. Harry smirks at you, taking your face into his hands as he pulls you in for a sweet makeup kiss.

“Ah, okay, so you want to channel your anger in the bedroom, I get it,” he smirks against your lips. “I’m fine with that, we can be rough tonight.”

“Harry Styles, you are such a pig, I can’t believe I married you.”

“I can’t believe it either,” he smiles, taking Leo from your arms. “You’re way too out of my league, why did you settle with me?” he jokes around.

“Because you have a big dick,” you answer with a straight face and Harry did not expect an answer like this, he starts coughing while laughing, adjusting the baby in his arms.

“Alright, I’ll take that, thank you,” he chuckles and leaning closer he steals a kiss, right when Maddie starts crying somewhere upstairs, she probably got into an argument with Max again. “I got it, daddy is on duty tonight. Just go and relax, baby.”

“I’ll clean up in the kitchen,” you sigh, but he shakes his head no.

“Nope, I’m doing that too. Go and watch some Netflix or take a nice bath. You’re off tonight.”

“Alright,” you smile and steal another quick kiss before Harry disappears upstairs to settle the argument between the twins.

The bath sounded nice, so that’s what you do while Harry covers the evening routine like a pro, putting everyone to bed while you have some time to pamper yourself and wash your hair without someone bursting into the bathroom and invading your privacy that’s been nonexistent for about seven years now.

When the kids are down Harry takes a quick shower and joins you in bed, craving to be close to you after such a stressful day. He spoons you from behind, strong arms holding you tight in his hold as he kisses your shoulder.

“I love you and I’m sorry about today.”

“I love you too and you’re forgiven,” you chuckle softly.

“I want to make it up to you. I hope you don’t have plans for Saturday.”

“I don’t, but you do, you’re flying out on friday, aren’t you?” you ask as you turn around to face him.

“Canceled my trip, I’ll do the interview online. I’ve been away too much lately, I want to be here. So, date night on Saturday? Already asked my mum, she can babysit for us.”

“Date night it is then,” you smile before leaning in to kiss him. This is exactly the man you fell in love with, the one you decided to have a family with and the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. Your Harry, your love, your partner forever.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!

#harry #styles #harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles au #harry styles fluff #harry styles x you #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #harry styles oneshot #harry styles one shot #harry styles blurb #dadrry #dad!harry #the another one universe

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mackenzielovee · 2 years

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parenthood part sixteen: dissension

a/n: hello ! happy sunday and a super special happy birthday to @imobsessedsblog ! i hope your day is amazing! please leave me some love if you can and enjoy <3

warnings: swearing, heartbreak, tears

ambivalence masterlist , parenthood masterlist

Two weeks.

It’s been two weeks since you heard from Topper or Sarah. Not for lack of trying, of course. The day Topper left your house after the beach day, he’d been gone exactly three hours before you got a text from him. Two simple words, but enough to shatter your heart in two.

It’s over.

You’d responded immediately — and sent him about a thousand texts since then — but hadn’t heard a thing back. You also texted Sarah, who didn’t respond either. Rafe reached out to both of them as well, but only got radio silence in return. He’d also reached out to Rose and Ward in hopes that they’d know where Sarah is, at least, but they don’t.

The days turning into weeks of silence from your best friend only make you sad. He’s been your rock for years; getting you through every single challenge and there to offer a hug and a kiss on the cheek at the end of it. Now, when he needs you, he runs off.

You still text him everyday, and Rafe watches you from across the room as you stare at the screen full of unanswered text messages. Without even being asked, Rafe takes the brunt of the work for the kids while you wallow in your worry. You’re not surprised, but you are thankful, and you tell him so every night before you show him.

On the morning of the fifteenth day of no Topper, you climb out of your empty bed and stumble out into the kitchen to make coffee. Josie is asleep on the couch, which has become her routine with Rafe for the last few months. She gets up and comes downstairs before he leaves for his run just so she can give him a hug and a kiss before he goes. He claims it’s the best part of his day, knowing it would usually lead to a cute pout on your lips. Instead, you just give him half a smile and then get lost in your head again.

“Morning, baby.”

Rafe’s voice shocks you out of your head and you spin around, eyes raking over his sweaty body. He gives you a faint smile, as if trying to assess your mood.

“Morning,” you rasp, listening to the coffee maker come to a halt, “Your girl is asleep on the couch again.”

“No, my girl is standing in our kitchen, worrying to death about something she can’t control,” he corrects, raising a brow as he nears you, “Come here.”

Your lips tip up as you shake your head, “No. You’re all sweaty.”

“You’re afraid of a little sweat?”

“Kinda!” you cry, laughing when he throws himself around you anyway.

He chuckles and squeezes you tighter, pulling his head back so he can take you in. Once you stop squirming to break free, your eyes meet his and you furrow your brows.

“What?” you ask.

“Missed that smile,” he confesses.

“I’m sorry,” you mumble, “I’m just worried about him.”

“I know, sweetheart. He’s probably taking this time to work out what he’s lost. He’s gonna need us soon, I know that.”

You nod, knowing Rafe’s right but not necessarily wanting to admit it. Instead, you cuddle into him and rest your chin on his sternum, puckering your lips for a kiss. He gives you one, and just as he starts to smile, you speak.

“I’m afraid,” you tell him, “I’m afraid something bad happened. Sarah’s always been a bit of a wild card, so I get this behavior from her. But, Top? He’s never disappeared this long. It has to be something major.”

“He’s okay,” Rafe says again, “He just needs some time.”

You just nod and bury your head into his chest, doing your best to let it go. You breathe Rafe in instead, letting him calm you down. It almost works, almost, when the sound of your sweet girl’s voice comes tearing through the house.

“Uncle Topper.”

Your eyes close under the two simple words. Rafe tenses against you, but lets his hand travel up and down your back to keep you calm.

“Josie, baby—” he starts, but her voice stops him.

“Uncle Topper’s outside!”

You perk up, yanking away from Rafe and meeting his eyes for a split second before you hurry out into the living room. Just as Josie had said, Topper slips into the house, using his key, and smiles when he sees Josie.

“Hi, my angel,” he greets her, lifting her up for a hug.

“Hi, Uncle Top,” she smiles, “Missed you.”

He purses his lips and nods, emotions evident at her words. You stand by the stairs and take him in with Rafe pressed to your back, sure he’s doing the same. He’s smaller somehow; his hair is a mess and he definitely hasn’t shaved since the last time you saw him. He looks hungover and sad, even as Josie paws at his stubble and leans in to give his jaw a kiss.

“I missed you, too,” he whispers.

For the first time since he entered, Topper looks up at you. It isn’t until you see his eyes that you realize how much he’s been going through in the last two weeks. He looks destroyed. Even worse, he looks as if he’s given up.

“Hey,” he says roughly, “Can we talk?”

You nod quickly, feeling your throat constrict as you swallow down your thousands of questions. Rafe’s hand meets your hip, and you watch as Topper tips his chin up at your husband.

“Let’s sit,” you speak, barely able to get the words out as you gesture toward the living room.

Rafe guides you down onto the couch while Topper settles into the armchair with Josie. She cuddles into his chest as if she can sense that something’s wrong, and you know it is when Topper pulls his wallet out of his pocket.

“Twelve hundred, right, Cameron?” Topper asks, fumbling with a handful of cash.

“What?” Rafe asks.

“Twelve hundred,” he repeats, tossing the pile of cash down on the coffee table in front of the two of you, “That’s how much you lent me for the ring. There it is.”

Your eyes widen as you look for Rafe for an explanation — one where he actually tells you that he lent money to Topper and you don’t have to hear about it after it clearly doesn’t work out. Rafe’s eyes close and he puffs out his cheeks, then slowly exhales.

“Why are you giving that back?” Rafe asks, still not willing to look at either of you.

Topper laughs, then leans forward and covers Josie’s ears with his palms, “Didn’t work out.”

Josie squirms and shoves Topper’s hands from her ears, then turns around and glares at him. To apologize, he leans forward and pecks her forehead.

Rafe’s eyes open then, but instead of facing the music with you, he keeps his eyes on Topper.

“Where’s my sister?”

Topper swallows, “Fuck, she’s— sorry, baby. Don’t say that word. She’s in Boston.”

Josie furrows her brows and sits up tall in his lap, reaching her hand up and petting his scuff the same way she was earlier. Rafe squirms uncomfortably, desperate to know more about why Sarah is in Boston and not here.

“Where’d you go?” Josie asks with the pout that makes Topper melt, “You left me.”

Immediately, Topper shakes his head, “I would never do that, Josephine. You’re my girl. My only girl.”

“What about Aunt Sarah?” she asks.

Topper’s eyes meet yours before he looks back at her, and you can tell he’s biting back the response he wants to give. Instead, he paints a fake smile on his face and pulls her closer.

“She wasn’t the one for me,” he explains, “But you know who is?”

She grins, “Me.”

“Correct,” he smiles, “And I promise, I will never leave you. Are we okay?”

She nods happily, standing up on his thighs to wrap her arms around his neck.

“I love you,” she says.

“I love you, too, angel.”

You shift in your seat, needing desperately to know what happened but not wanting to push him away from Josie. Rafe pats your leg, signaling that he’ll take Josie and leave the room while the two of you talk. You give him a small smile, and just as he stands, Connor comes down the stairs.

“Uncle Top!”

You sigh internally, but smile when you see Connor dive over the armchair and into Topper’s lap. Topper smiles and embraces him, immediately asking him how he is and to catch him up on everything. Rafe sits down again and puts his arm around you, kissing your temple gently as you accept waiting your turn.

By the time the kids calm down, you’ve had two cups of coffee and your leg continues to jump up and down. Topper looks over at you and sighs, then sits up and repositions Josie.

“Hey, angel, I’m gonna talk to your mom for a bit. I’ll be right back, okay?”

Josie looks over at you in hesitation, then nods, “Okay.”

You stand up when he looks over at you, then sets her down in the chair and stands from his seat. You stand too, giving Rafe a hesitant look before you squeeze his hand and follow Topper out to the deck.

Silently, the two of you sit down. You balance your half empty mug on your thigh and squirm, working up the courage to look over at him. He keeps his head down in his lap, hands gripping the arms of the chairs tightly.

“Did you get my messages?” you ask weakly.

“I did,” he replies, not looking up, “All thirty-two of them.”

You purse your lips to hide an embarrassed smile, watching him as his own mouth tips up at the ridiculous number.

“Sorry,” you mumble.

“Don’t be. I was acting like a tool.”

You watch his eyes flicker up to yours, and before either of you can say another word, he gives you a real smile. You visibly relax in your seat at the sight of his smile, convincing yourself that maybe things aren’t as bad as you’ve been thinking up for the past hour.

“What’s in Boston?”

His jaw shifts as he exhales, “She got a job up there. Claims she wants to put her Communications degree to work in a place that’s not surrounded by water.”

“Oh,” you nod, “But, you’re not going with her?”

“Y/N,” he sighs, shifting in his chair and tucking his head into his hands, “It’s complicated.”

You lean forward, wrapping your hand around his forearm to pull his hands away. He looks over at you, his eyes swimming with tears, and sniffles.

“I can handle it. What happened, Top?”

He swallows roughly, staring at you for a moment before he speaks.

“We broke up,” he states bluntly, but you know he’s not through, “She’s pregnant.”

Your jaw drops as your heart sinks into your stomach, looking at him as if to find some silent explanation on how that news could lead to a breakup. When he doesn’t elaborate, you puff out your cheeks and exhale slowly.

“Why—I mean, what—”

“What does that have to do with us breaking up?” he guesses, shaking his head as he chuckles sarcastically, “Well, she’s pregnant, and she doesn’t want a baby. She says we’re not ready. She, uh, found out she was pregnant three weeks before she told me, then came to me with a pregnancy test and an adoption pamphlet.”

You swallow, “And you said—”

“I said,” he continues, “We’re getting married soon, and I’m scared, too, but we can do this. She said no, things escalated, and then she threw the ring at me.”

“Top,” you whine, “I’m so—”

“She’s keeping it,” he interrupts, “But she doesn’t want to be a mom. She said she’ll respect what I want if I respect what she wants, too. So, I’ve spent the last two weeks deciding between being a single parent or giving my child up to strangers.”

Your eyes well up with tears as you try to even imagine being put in such a place and coming out in a good headspace. You’re sure you’d look even worse than Topper does, and even that is being generous.

You reach out and grab his hand, covering it with both of your own. His jaw shifts as he holds back tears of his own, looking at you just as you start to cry.

“I’m so sorry, Topper. That’s a really tough position to be put in. Do you want to talk about it? Figure out your decision?”

He shakes his head, “I’ve made my decision.”

Your throat constricts as you suck in a breath, feeling as though you’ll never be able to get enough air in.

“Oh,” you squeak.

He squeezes your hand and gives you a small, sad smile, “It’s my baby, Y/N. I’m not just going to give them up. And, yeah, maybe a nice couple would be really good to the kid, but I’m their dad. I can do this. I’m just, um — I’m gonna need a lot of help.”

You grin, sniffling and trying to keep your tears in. He laughs when you nod and pull him in for a hug, squeezing him so tight that he has to know you believe his decision is the right one. He chuckles, and when he pulls back, you wipe the stray tears from his cheeks.

“I’m so happy for you,” you whisper, “You’re gonna have a baby, Top. That’s amazing. You’re amazing.”

“Thank you,” he answers.

“I mean it. You’re going to be great. This baby doesn’t know how lucky they are.”

His eyes flutter closed at the words coming from you, fresh tears falling at the motion. A million questions flow through your head, but you don’t ask any of them. You just sit with him, letting him breathe in his new future.

“I have to talk to the kids,” he eventually says, nodding his head in the direction of the house, “I have to go to Boston for a while. I need to take care of her while she’s pregnant. I just don’t want them thinking I’ve left them. My heart will always be here with those two, you know? They’re the kids that made me realize I want my own.”

You smile, “They love you so much. So do I. I know this situation isn’t how you thought it would happen, but I think you’re doing everything right. I’m just sorry that it’s not what Sarah wants, too.”

He clenches his jaw, “It was. That’s why I proposed. We talked about living here and having kids and building a life together. And then Boston came along, and she just changed. I don’t even want to think about why.”

“Topper,” you say weakly, “You have been amazing to her. Her change in behavior had nothing to do with you, I’m sure of it. I really thought things would work out between the two of you this time.”

Tears fall from his eyes again, but this time, it’s different. He nods in silent agreement with you, taking in shaky breaths to try to collect himself.

“I did, too,” he confesses, “But, selfishly, I’m glad my baby will be half Sarah. She’s the first girl I ever loved, you know? Maybe she won’t be the last, but at least I’ll have a piece of her for the rest of my life.”

Before you can help yourself, you set your mug down on the ground and pull Topper up, begging him for a hug. He wraps his arms around you and squeezes you tight, letting himself cry.

“You’re a good man,” you whisper, “We will be here for whatever you need. I promise.”

“Thank you, Y/N,” he replies, voice thick with emotion, “You’re my best friend.”

“You’re mine, too, Top.”

You hug him for a while, hoping that if you squeeze tight enough, you can push those broken pieces of his heart back together. When he finally pulls back, he lets you wipe the tear streaks from his cheeks and then gives you a smile, his silent way of telling you that this helped him.

“When do you have to go?” you ask.

“Tomorrow,” he says, “I want to be there for all the milestones. I don’t wanna miss anything more than I already have.”

You nod, trying and failing not to let your disappointment show. He lets his hands find yours and squeezes before he nods in the direction of the house.

“Want me to get the kids?”

He nods, “Yeah. Could you, um, talk to Rafe? It’s his sister and I just— I can’t do it.”

“Of course,” you reply, “I’ll be right back.”

He releases you and watches as you take a few steps to the door. He waits until your hand meets the doorknob to speak again.

“Y/N,” he calls, “I love you.”

You smile and turn around, “I love you, too.”

He returns your smile and lets you escape back into the house, taking the minute alone to collect himself. You walk into the living room to find Rafe and Connor on the couch together as they play a game on Rafe’s phone, while Josie plays on the floor with Connor’s stuffed dinosaurs.

Rafe looks up at you when you enter, and just as you collide with the blue in his eyes, tears start to well. He tenses and stands, rushing over to you without a second’s worth of hesitation.

“Sweetheart, what is it?” he asks.

You shake your head and give him a fake smile as you sniffle, then look over to the kids, who stare at both of you.

“Guys, Uncle Top wants to talk to both of you outside,” you tell them.

“Okay,” Connor answers, rising from the couch.

He reaches out and takes Josie’s hand, leading her toward the back door. You wait for it to click closed behind them before collapsing into Rafe, letting your emotions overwhelm you.

“Shit, baby, hey,” he whispers, “Hey, it’s okay. Let’s sit.”

He pulls you over to the couch and helps you sit down. You reach up and wipe under your eyes with the tips of your fingers, doing your best to compose yourself for his sake. He’s patient, as you expect, and brushes the hair away from your face as he waits for you to speak.

“Sarah, um,” you sniffle, your voice cracking slightly as you continue, “She got a job up in Boston. She’s staying up there, and, well, she’s pregnant.”

“She’s pregnant?” he repeats, his eyes wide, “But they’re— he said—”

“I know,” you nod, “She doesn’t want to be a mom. At least, not right now.”

Rafe’s lips part as he takes in the new information, and you can practically see the wheels turning in his brain. His hand falls to your thigh as he collapses back into the couch, running a a hand through his messy hair.

“Shit,” he mumbles, “So, what’s going to happen with the baby?”

Your eyes close, “Topper’s going to raise them. On his own.”

You can feel Rafe tense, but your eyes remain glued shut. Rafe’s grip on your thigh tightens, a silent beg for you to state your opinion before he explodes with his own. You swallow while he shifts his weight, letting out a shaky and angry breath.

“What the fuck,” he hisses, “She’s just gonna not be in her child’s life? Forever? She’s giving up an engagement and a baby for a fucking job?”

Rafe stands as he raises his voice, which is the only reason you allow your eyes to open once more. You stand with him and cup his cheeks in your palms, trying to calm him down.

“It’s her life, Rafe,” you tell him, “It’s her choice. If this is what Sarah wants, we have to respect that.”

“Fuck that, I don’t respect anything about her abandoning a family,” he spits.

“Rafe,” you sigh, “She’s not abandoning anything—”

“Bullshit, she’s not. I’m gonna go call her right now—”

“Stop it,” you demand, grabbing onto his wrists, “You can’t make this choice for her, and you’ll only drive her away if you yell at her. She’s an adult and she’s made her decision. Topper’s okay. Sarah deserves to have a career.”

“She deserves to—”

“Rafe,” you stop him, “I’m sure this was a difficult decision for Sarah to make. But she made it alone, and we have to respect that. Just because you disagree with your sister doesn’t make her wrong. Please. Let’s just both take some time to cool off before we say anything to anyone.”

His jaw is clenched tight as he stares at you; evidently fighting every desire to dial up his sister and scream into her voicemail. Instead, he takes a deep breath and lets it all out, then pulls you tightly into his arms.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, “Didn’t mean to yell.”

“I know,” you reply.

You clutch him tight, pulling his shirt into your fist as you breathe unevenly against his neck. You two remain like that for a few minutes, not wanting to break the silence with more discussion about Sarah, and break away only when the back door opens.

Topper carries a crying Josie inside with Connor in front of him, who looks sad but is attempting to hold it together. Josie’s arms lock around his neck and her little sniffles sound from the crook of his neck. Connor immediately walks over to you and holds his arms up, letting you pick him up and hold him tight.

Topper doesn’t look much better, in fact, he looks gutted. He doesn’t attempt to put Josie down or even make her feel better, he just continues to kiss the top of her head every now and then.

“I’m sorry,” Topper says to you, and when he finally works himself up to looking over to Rafe, his frown deepens, “Look, Rafe—”

“You have no reason to explain yourself to me, Top,” Rafe says, keeping his hand on your waist, “You’ve got all my respect.”

Topper’s Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, “Thank you.”

Rafe nods, then steps over to the coffee table and picks up the cash Topper had left there to repay him. Folding the bills in half, Rafe holds them out to him, nodding when Topper shakes his head.

“You’re my brother,” Rafe says, shifting his jaw to prevent his emotions from showing, “Babies are expensive. Take it. We’ll get more to you whenever you need it.”

Topper shakes his head again, “Rafe—”

“Take the money, Top.”

With a tight grip on Josie, Topper grabs the money and stuffs it into his pocket, as if hurrying will mean he doesn’t have to accept it. With a nod to Rafe, Topper turns and looks down at the girl on his chest, heart visibly breaking at the sight of her.

“Angel, I’ve gotta—”

“No,” she whines.

Topper’s eyes close as he lets his lips meet her forehead, urging her up.

“Come on, Jo. Let me see those eyes,” he presses. Pulling back, she looks up at him with her best puppy dog eyes, earning tears from Topper, “There they are. My favorite girl in the whole world.”

“I can go to Boston with you,” she proposes, “I’ll be extra good, I promise.”

He smiles, but it’s tainted with more tears, “I know you would. But your Mommy and Daddy would miss you too much.”

Connor looks up at Topper from his place on your shoulder, “You’ll come home for my birthday?”

“Of course I will,” Topper promises.

“Mine, too,” Josie insists.

“I promise. I’ll call a lot, okay?”

“Okay,” she says, bottom lip jutting out in a pout.

“Come here. I love you so much, my angel,” he whispers to her, pulling her close.

Josie starts to cry again, and you’re not at all surprised when Topper hands her off to Rafe to avoid breaking. Connor squirms from your arms and runs into Topper’s, clutching him tight.

“I love you, Uncle Top,” Connor tells him.

“I love you, too, buddy. Call me whenever you want to, okay?”

Connor nods, “I will.”

The four of you walk Topper outside to his truck, where he receives another round of hugs from each of you. Rafe hands Josie off to you and sticks his hand out for Topper to shake, but is quick to pull him in for a hug.

“You’re gonna be a good father,” Rafe tells him, “Because you’re a good man.”

You give Topper a hug after Rafe and make him promise to call more than once every two weeks, and just like that, he’s gone. Although you feel like collapsing into nothing right there in the driveway, you regain composure and walk inside, gripping onto Connor’s hand for dear life.

The remainder of the day is spent holding the kids close and making sure they understand that Topper has to go, and that he’s not leaving them. Both of them seem sad in their own way, but by the time they fall asleep on both you and Rafe, you figure that they’re sad because they see the sadness in you.

Rafe carries them both up to bed for you, telling you just to rest for a bit and he’ll be down soon. You let your emotions get the best of you once he’s out of the room, and you cry for Topper for a few minutes, Then, you regain control of yourself and cover up with a blanket, letting your mind work as you stare off.

Part of you, like Rafe, wonders how Sarah could make such a choice. Another part of you wants to stand up for her until the end. You’re sure a million thoughts went into her decision to end it and move. Maybe she’s not happy here. Maybe she’s not happy with Topper. If she’s not ready to be a mom, to make a lifelong commitment that will impact her every day, well, you can understand that. Sarah deserves the option that men get every single time they see a positive pregnancy test — to be involved or not. You refuse to crucify her over something that nobody would bat an eye at if she were a man.

Rafe finds you like that when he comes back downstairs; wrapped up in your own head and cuddled into the couch. He walks past you initially, and when you hear the familiar clanking of mugs in the kitchen, you smile to yourself.

He returns a few minutes later with two full mugs of hot chocolate — and about a million marshmallows sticking out of each one — then hands one off to you. As he sits, one of his arms comes around you while the other holds his mug. You collapse into his chest and inhale his familiar scent, letting it wash away all feelings of worry or sadness.

“She just left,” Rafe sighs, talking about Sarah, “She packed up her shit and left without saying goodbye.”

“I’m sure she’ll come home to visit and stuff,” you mumble.

“I don’t care about that,” he grunts, “She left our children, Y/N. Without a care in the world.”

You shake your head, “I’m sure it’s not like that—”

“It’s exactly like that. Sarah’s selfish at heart. This whole mess proves that. And she can put on her little show and play us all, but this is always how things turn out with her. I mean, shit, you remember how she was.”

“Of course I do, Rafe,” you sigh, “But you can’t hold that against her for the rest of her life. You’re not your worst mistake, either.”

He grows quiet at that. You sip from your mug of hot chocolate and lean into him, trying to simultaneously calm him and yourself.

“I just can’t imagine choosing a career over my family,” he whispers.

You nod to show him that you understand his point, “People are different.”

Rafe nods his head, and silence overcomes the two of you again. Your eyes start to pull closed, exhausted from the extreme emotions you’ve had to feel over the course of the day.

“We have to help him,” Rafe says, “In every way. He’s gonna need it.”

He reaches over and removes your mug from your hands, which allows you to wrap your arm around his chest and fully cuddle into him.

“We will,” you reply.

He chuckles to himself and kisses the top of your head, shifting minimally to place the mugs on the coffee table before cuddling back in with you. He fixes the blanket over both of you, then pulls you in closer.

“I love you, sweetheart,” he says quietly, “Thank you for everything you’ve given me.”

You smile, “I love you, too, Cameron.”

He laughs, and before you know it, the sleep pulls you under. You don’t even object when you wake up at four in the morning with Rafe cuddled on top of you, face buried in your neck as he softly snores. You just press a kiss to his forehead and close your eyes once more, thankful that even if you have to deal with temper tantrums and laundry and lost toys, at least you have a partner to do all of it with.

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