#Also please don‘t come for me I left out some of the more fucked up things on purpose

[skipper1331]

Okay so this is just an idea and you don’t even have to use the player I put you could literally do it for anyone and if you have a specific person in mind that you’ve been wanting to write for I can edit this so that you can write it for someone else. But please let me know if you like it. But yea if you sort of like the idea but not the player I can switch it🙂

Alexia x reader

Reader is injury prone and always falling. She tends to fall a lot when trying to flirt with women and some how her teammates always manage to catch her especially Alexia. Reader trips frequently when trying to flirt with Alexia. It’s worse on the pitch but somehow Alexia is always there just before reader falls to catch her or shoulder bump her back in balance. Lucy is always smiling and asking if you know how your feet work. Mapi keeps looking at the areas in which you keep tripping to see if the ground is uneven or something before asking what you keep tripping over. “Is it oxygen? Did you not get enough oxygen to understand how your legs work? Is it air? You’re the only one that keeps falling.” Ingrid points out that you’ve tripped and gotten hurt more times than Lucy and Lucy at least trips over something.

Reader hasn’t been allowed to leave her apartment without someone with her especially after the last time she was out by herself and somehow managed to fall into a canal. Mapi and Ingrid usually have reader join them reader is like their child at this point. Other times it’s Alexia or Lucy but Lucy is also sometimes clumsy so Alexia was usually the go to.

While out partying with the team after their win reader is at the bar trying to ask out a girl but somehow slips and nearly hits her head but Alexia pops up and keeps her steady. “You should really stop flirting if you’re going to keep falling.” Alexia makes it her mission to stay semi close to reader and glare at any woman or man who dares to come near you. Having gotten some random persons number reader decides to go on a date only to gain an injury while out. Mapi and Ingrid who were also out at the same restaurant help reader to the ER. Reader has to get some stitches for her hand that she managed to cut.

Alexia is already waiting in readers apartment when reader gets home with Mapi and Ingrid both immediately get badgered by Alexia. “It’s fine I cut myself accidentally with a knife while I was on a date.” “On a date?!? With who? You know you can’t go anywhere unsupervised.”“come on Alexia it’s not that bad it’s just a cut”. “Just a cut. What happens if you get hurt and can’t play and it could have been avoided?” “Funny coming from the woman who fucked her acl and left me on the pitch. Mapi and Ingrid and rölfo have made sure I was fine this whole time.” The two get into a fight that ends poorly. The next few weeks before the European league cup Alexia and reader aren’t talking. During the match Reader keeps nearly falling but has managed to stay on her feet so far thanks to Mapi.

End of the match Alexia catches reader before she trips and kisses her after the final whistle. “You were never this bad at walking when we were dating.”

Okay so some background that came to me super late😩: Reader and Alexis did date but Alexia had some commitment issues. Reader can be a bit talkative on the pitch with others. Reader gets distracted easily and could walk head first into a pole. Before dating Alexia reader did in fact walk into a street lamp. Reader is allergic to standing upright. Alexia can be possessive🙃. Mapi does not understand how after 5 years with the club reader keeps falling in the same spot on the field (she’s checked the spots several times it only seems to be reader and Lucy who keep falling). As a joke the girls gift her with bubble wrap and life vests. Reader has fallen into a canal several times. 🙃💙sorry this sucks

That’s a very long request but i like the plot idea!

As i said i have some request and I don‘t know in which order I’ll work on them but either way it‘ll take me some time to write it:)

[jon-withnoh]

Finally answering this question from @gayvillainera (from an ask game a while back).

“🍈 Who’s your blorbo and what are some of your favorite headcanons/ideas about them that repeatedly show up in your fics? Free pass to rant about blorbo opinions.“

I‘ve decided to go all out for this and will be giving you my opinions on Danny, Rebecca and Beatrice, since they‘re all POV characters in my current fic.

1) Danny: No fictional character has had this much of a chokehold on me since I first listened to Wicked in 2018. I don‘t think it‘s possible for me to get enough of this character. Every single actress, acting choice, (un-)official sequel or fic delights me. I love seeing what other people make of her. Personally, I see Danny as a person who knows what it‘s like to be extremely lonely. She has some interesting parallels with Ich in this regard — I imagine her as someone who probably grew up pretty isolated / did not have many friends or family, so when she started working for Rebecca, she was all too ready to pour all of her affection and devotion into her. Another interesting parallel between Danny and Ich is their lack of first names. Both Mrs Danvers and Mrs de Winter are names that almost double as (job) titles. What‘s devastating about Danny‘s name is that the more intimate name we do have for her is a nickname given to her by Rebecca. Almost every aspect of her life is defined by Rebecca and later her absence. In terms of writing her, I adored writing soft, stoic, traumatised Danny for Was Wird Aus Uns. As you‘ll see, Danny in Nie Wirst Du Mir Ganz Gehören is quite different — she still has that tenderness that I think comes through in almost all versions of her, but I‘m leaning into her jealousy and possessiveness over Rebecca a lot more. Bottom line, I adore Danny. I love her complexity and all-consuming yearning.

2) Rebecca: Rebecca fascinates me. I have trouble with readings that paint her as purely evil. The novel is a lot more subtle than that. Another thing that irks me about one-dimensional interpretations of Rebecca is that they have a tendency to leave out important context — for example that Rebecca would have had a much harder time divorcing Maxim than he would have divorcing her. In terms of my own reading of the character, as with Danny, I enjoy Rebecca‘s complexity. I like reading her and Maxim as two people who are actually quite similar in temperament, but have very different approaches to tradition and morality. For my current fic, I‘m trying to figure out Rebecca‘s motivations — what does she want? Does she love Danny and if so, in what way does she love Danny? I like playing around with the idea that putting on the mask of Mrs de Winter would have put quite the strain on Rebecca, no matter how proficient she was at it. She feels like a person who has never fully learned to identify and deal with her emotions, at least partly because Danny is so ready to deal with everything for her. I have a lot more thoughts but they‘re difficult to put into words, so you‘ll have to wait for my next few chapters :)

3) Beatrice: Darling Beatrice. I love her. My favourite Beatrice headcanon is that her marriage to Giles is purely platonic (I like to think of Giles as ace) and that these two are devoted life partners. Part of this headcanon is that Giles actually was the one to introduce Beatrice to her romantic life partner, a woman named Grace (stay tuned for my Beatrice backstory fic). Furthermore, I love Beatrice‘s ability to have chemistry with every single woman in the narrative. I can see her with pretty much everyone. In my current fics, Bee is about 8 years older than Maxim and since I mistakenly assumed Maxim is 45, that makes her 53. I wouldn‘t write Beatrich with this kind of age difference, but I can see it in different contexts. I don‘t want to spoil too much about my current fic, but I‘m in love with the idea that both Danny/Beatrice and Rebecca/Beatrice have hooked up/are hooking up and the messy dynamics this could lead to between the three of them.

I am not writing this on my phone so I‘ll probably post it and then be shocked by how long it is… Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my rambles, I‘m always happy to ramble more! I love these sad messed up women so much.

[meteorrogers]

the secret charm of forbidden things | a. b.

summary: you piss off your professor 

pairing: professor!andy barber x reader

warnings: professor/student relationship, student humiliation (nothing serious), fluff, smut (+18 pls), daddy kink, spanking, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex (and like the most unoriginal plot); let me know if i missed something!

word count: 3,478 (approx)

a/n: i really tried to avoid writing this shit but my brain just wouldn’t let it go, so i’m really sorry for this. also, i’m not a smut writer so this couldn’t be more poorly written. sorry for that too *nervous laughter* i hope there are some readers out there who enjoy cliché stories lol. oh and i know nothing about criminal law so i just skimmed through the Mass. laws and picked the easiest thing i could create a question of. anyway, if you do read this, i hope you’ll enjoy it and let me know what you think! every kind of feedback is appreciated!! 

You’re browsing the internet, looking for some quality e-shop that would offer lingerie you’d like. Or more importantly, he would like. And since your focus is completely on the phone that is hidden from the professor’s eyes (or so you think), you miss the call of your name.

“Miss (Y/L/N)!” the stern and this time louder sound of a male voice brings your attention to the man that it belongs to, standing only a few feet from your seat, thanks to its place in the front row. His expression is hard, a clear sign that you’ve been caught and you shrink into your chair, your cheeks becoming warm. “If you want to pass my class, I suggest you turn off the phone and focus on the lecture.”

You do as you’re asked and put the phone away but you don’t expect him to address you again.

“So since you seem to have enough knowledge that you don’t even need to listen to me,” he pauses and comes closer to you, crossing his arms. “Tell me what the punishments for organ trafficking are.”

You hold your breath, not even realizing it as you’re trying to think of the correct answer, however, that’s a little difficult with him towering over you, and your eyes can’t help but flicker to his crotch that is aligned with your vision. When you look up again, there is an amusement painted over his face which you almost miss to notice. 

“Um, imprisonment?”

The professor keeps looking at you expectantly and when you don‘t say anything more, his chest heaves in a deep sigh, and his eyebrows rise as he looks at the floor in disappointment. “You’ll be having a hard time getting clients, Miss (Y/L/N),” he tells you and goes back to his desk to lean his backside on it.

Okay, you weren’t paying attention but you also thought that the times when professors publicly humiliated students had been left behind. So, now you are not only embarrassed but also pissed.

You just roll your eyeballs and slightly shake your head, taking a pen and doodling in the open notebook laying on your desk in order to calm yourself down and trying not to think about the judgemental stares being sent your way.

“Does anyone here want to remind Miss (Y/L/N) the consequences of organ trafficking?” he asks, before fucking Amelia raises her hand with her all too sugary may I, professor Barber? and you nearly lose it. You watch him as he sweetly smiles at her and prompts her to answer. She does, correctly so, and while she’s going into details, he lets his eyes wander and rest them on you from time to time. You never avert your eyes, glaring at him, hoping he takes notice of the annoyance written all over your face, but he just smirks when she finishes talking and he looks back at her.

“You’re a brilliant student, Amelia. I think you deserve a reward for the hard work.” When he stresses the word reward, he gives you a glance, and you can’t keep your eyes from rolling, again.

“Alright, class, that’s it for today. Don’t forget to send in the paper that’s due Sunday. Enjoy your weekend.”

You pack your things, shoving them into your bag before storming towards the exit, but you don’t make it too far when the professor’s voice stops you in your tracks.

“Miss (Y/L/N), a moment, please,” he says as he gathers his things. You sigh, closing your eyes as you mentally prepare yourself for what’s to come. Turning around, you make your way towards him. 

“I believe we need to discuss your work ethic.” when you remain silent, he continues. “Great, since you don’t have any objections, you can follow me into my office.”

You do as you’re told and while you wait for him to unlock the door in the corner of the auditorium, you catch a glimpse of Amelia giving you a smug smirk. Mr. Barber finally opens the door and extends his arm, letting you in before him. You enter and stop in the middle of the office, nervously fiddling with the hem of your pleated black skirt as you hear a soft click signaling that the door is now closed, followed by the snap of the lock.

You gulp, your heart beating faster as you continue to stand there and try not to give away your nervousness. The only sound that follows is the echo of his footsteps as he walks past you and to his desk, putting his stuff on the wooden surface. He doesn’t say anything, unbuttoning his cuffs and rolling the sleeves of his moss green dress shirt up to his elbows and the veins of his forearm are left on full display.

“Mr. Barber, I—“ you finally speak up but he cuts you off, making his way towards the comfy-looking couch sitting alongside the wall opposite of you. 

“You wanna tell me what that was about? You know I have a no-phone policy in my class, right?” he sits down and spreads his arms on the back of the sofa.

“I’m sorry, I was just—“

“You were just what? Looking for some skimpy underwear to tease me with during the lectures?” the blood rushes to your cheeks and you look to your left, not able to hold his gaze anymore. “As much as I’d enjoy that sight, I’m still a little disappointed in you. The question wasn’t that hard.” He’s closely watching your every reaction as your body squirms, your thighs discreetly rubbing against each other. “You know, Amelia truly is a great student. She’s slowly becoming better than you since you seem distracted for most of my classes. What reward do you think I should give her?”

And that is what causes you to run out of patience and your head to snap to where he is sitting. Bingo, Andy thinks.

“Are you fucking serious, Andy?” you say with a raised voice. If you blinked, you wouldn’t even catch the smirk that formed on his lips for like a millisecond.

“Hey!” he scolds “Watch your tone.“

You ignore him.

“Since when do you humiliate your students in front of the whole class, huh?” you confront him angrily “It was a dick move, Andy, you know that! And then the bullshit with Amelia? If you want her to wet your dick, just ask her, I’m sure she’ll be up for it.”

“Come here,” he says calmly which unsettles you because you expected him to be furious given the way you’d lashed out at him, but you roll your eyes anyway and turn to leave, however, the sound of your name coming from his lips stops you. “(Y/N).” you inhale deeply and turn back to him. “I said, come here.”

You come up to him, still keeping your distance so you don‘t stand between his spread-out legs. “What?” you bite.

He huffs out a laugh. “You’re walking on very thin ice, sweetheart.” He says and you feel your belly doing flips at the nickname. “How about you lose the attitude and come here like I instructed you to.” You cross your arms over your chest.

“How about you go fuck yourself.”

And that’s the last straw. Andy Barber is a very patient guy but when it comes to a bratty behavior like yours right now, he tends to lose his temper pretty quickly.

He swiftly leans forward and grabs your wrist, yanking you between his thighs. You have to catch yourself on his broad shoulders as you stumble from the firm tug, your stomach flush against his chest. His hand grabs the strap of your bag, putting it on the floor before his fingers fall to the back of your thighs, sliding up and up until they rest just below the cheeks of your ass, holding you against him.

“You wanna be a bad girl today, huh?”

You frown and click your tongue. “Jesus, Andy, I’m not in the mood for this.” You start pushing against his shoulders to put a distance between you, failing miserably.

“Sweetheart, you’re not even trying. You think I’m stupid or what?”

“I’m serious, let me go,” you say, but you don’t even sound convincing to yourself.

“You’re not in the mood, you say?” he asks and you nod your head. “Then why do I smell you all the way here, hm?” his fingers creep higher, playing with the lacy hem of your panties. He snorts. “You’re desperate to get fucked, aren’t you?”

By now, your panties are drenched. After what he did to you in the class, you tried so hard not to be turned on by him, but it’s impossible. Andy is a very attractive man, very intelligent and in combination with his sinful mouth, you just can’t bring yourself to not want to be fucked by him.

He doesn’t break eye contact when he hooks his fingers into your underwear and slides them down your legs, until he leans forward, his cheek brushing your hip so he can pull them all the way down himself. You step out of them and his back straightens up, putting the piece of ruined fabric into his pants pocket.

“Get over my knee.”

“Andy, come on. We’re in school. Can’t you just fuck me now and spank me later?”

“Oh, so suddenly you are in the mood?” he raises his brows “Get over my knee. Now. You don’t wanna piss me off more than I already am.” He says sternly.

You unhurriedly move from in between his legs but you’re too slow for his liking. Before you can react, he’s once again yanking you by your wrist, twisting your body in a way that makes you fall over his thick thighs. One hand gently settles on your throat, holding your head up, and the other starts tickling the back of your knee before slowly creeping up your thigh, tucking up your skirt, until you feel the cool air of the room brush against your wet pussy.

You clutch his pants in your hands, and when his palm leaves your skin you prepare yourself for the first blow. Instead, he gently sets it down on your butt again just to caress it, but even that unexpected touch has you jerking forward. He laughs and before you know it, the hand lifts itself up and strikes your right cheek. This time your body jerks rightfully but the fingers around your neck tighten, preventing you from moving too much.

“Not so tough now, huh?” he strokes the sore skin. “How many do you think you deserve?” you shrug as best as the restraint allows you to. “If I remember correctly” he pauses, just to brush his fingers against your pussy lips, smiling to himself when he feels the arousal leaking out of you “You weren’t paying attention in the class.” He spanks your other cheek. “You were using your phone even though it’s forbidden.” For that, the next hit lands on your right cheek again and you don’t think before you dare to open your mouth.

“Really? You are gonna lecture me about what is and isn‘t forbidden? You’re fucking your student for God’s sake.”

“Just for that, I’m adding 5 more to the ones for raising your voice at me, lying to me, and disobeying me.”

He spanks you for everything he listed, caressing your sore butt in between each hit and you are on the verge of crying, the tears in your eyes about to fall down your cheeks. When you think he’s finished, you release a relieved breath, but suddenly, he strikes you three more times, without any break and you cry out, squeezing your eyes shut, the tears finally rolling down.

“That was for the eye rolls I received throughout the day.” He says angrily before leaning down, brushing his lips against your ear as he whispers. “Now, what do you call me when we’re alone?” You just need a minute to catch your breath to reply but he’s not having it. “Answer me right now, or I’ll spank your ass raw, you won’t even be able to sit right. What do you call me?” he asks again.

“Daddy.” You whimper quietly and he smiles.

“Good girl.” He forces your body up with the hand on your throat and throws you on the couch, but before you can make yourself comfortable, he flips you on your stomach and grabs your hips, pulling you up so your ass is in the air.

His touch disappears for a moment and when you adjust your head to be able to get at least a little peek at him, your cheek pressed into the couch, you see him loosening his tie. He grabs your arms and crosses them at your wrist on the small of your back, tying them together with the piece of fabric.

He kisses each palm and then continues up your bare arm, licking, sucking, and biting, until his lips reach your shoulder covered by the short sleeve of your white t-shirt. “You okay, sweetheart?” He knows you are, but just to be sure.

“Yes, daddy.” You smile and he tugs the neckline of your shirt away for a second just to kiss your skin.

Then, he kneels on the floor behind you, coming face to face with your weeping cunt and he needs to adjust himself at the sight. He curls his fingers around your thighs and starts kissing them, getting closer to your core and his eyes close on their own accord when he inhales your smell. His lips finally make contact with your lower ones, his tongue licking a stripe from your clit to your entrance before he pulls away and hums, leaving you trembling. 

“Andy!” You whine from the loss as your frustration grows, and he bites the tender skin of your ass.

“Baby, call me Andy one more time and you won’t be coming for a very long time.”

Your breath shudders when you exhale. “I’m sorry, daddy.”

If it was any other time and any other place, he would take his time to properly punish you, but someone could knock on the door any second and he’s honestly been dying to devour you all day.

He spreads your cheeks and leans forward, finally burying his face into your cunt, his tongue finding the little bundle of nerves and you moan, your eyes rolling in your head from the feeling of his soft tongue relieving the ache combined with the feeling of his rough beard scratching your inner thighs.

Andy takes the bud between his lips, sucking harshly and you buck your hips, causing him to grunt and the vibrations go straight into your clit, more slick dripping from your hole. He doesn‘t let a single drop go to waste as he licks up to your entrance, slurping the juices along the way before he starts plunging his tongue in and out of you. You bite your lip, trying not to make too loud sounds.

“That feel good?” he pulls away to ask, replacing his tongue with his thumb as he waits for your answer, rubbing your clit in quick circles.

“So good, daddy. Let me cum, please,” you whimper and he smirks.

“You’re lucky we’re in my office right now, otherwise I’d take my sweet time to take this sweet pussy apart,” to emphasize it, he thrusts his thumb into you and pinches your sensitive clit between two fingers, another moan escaping your lips. “I wouldn’t let you cum until you were crying and screaming out apologies.”

He slides his thumb back down to your clit, quickly circling it as he dives into you again, massaging your walls with the soft muscle until the knot in your belly starts tightening and you bite on the cushion to prevent yourself from screaming as the dam finally breaks and you’re cumming, Andy drinking up everything your pussy has to offer and he needs to force himself to pull away, your taste almost too addictive.

Before you know it, the sound of his belt clanking reaches your ears and a moment later, you feel his hand on your hip while the other gets a hold of his cock, positioning the tip at your entrance before pushing himself slowly into your heat. He groans while you mewl, filling you to the hilt and giving you some time to adjust to his size.

He starts with slow thrusts once he feels you constrict around him and the hand that isn’t bruising your hip grips the knot that holds your wrists together, giving himself leverage when he begins to quicken his pace.

“Fuck, you feel so good, baby. So tight.”

And he feels amazing, too, his cock reaching all the right places, the familiar tingling reappearing again as your thighs start to quiver. He leans over you, his chest to your back as his hand on your hip slides down and starts rubbing your clit.

“You gonna cum, sweetheart?” his warm breath hits the shell of your ear. “You’re close, aren’t you? I can feel your pussy squeezing around me. God.”

“Please, daddy.” You mewl and he growls at your innocent voice, picking up his pace even more so, his thrusts becoming harder and your tied hands grasp his wrist. 

“Cum for me, baby. Cum for daddy.” He nips at your ear and with a few more thrusts, you’re cumming again, not able to hold in the moans anymore. He rides you through it, chasing his own orgasm and when you feel his hot cum filling you up, he stills, his breath brushing your cheek as he pants.

Once he comes down from his high, he kisses your jaw and stands up, pulling himself from your heat and you hiss at the feeling. He puts his cock into his boxers and zips his pants before he unties your hands, revealing the light red marks on your wrists. You stretch your hands a little before you bring them under yourself to lift yourself up, your skirt falling back down around your thighs and covering your now-glistening intimate parts.

Turning around, you stay kneeling on the couch, looking up at Andy with those big eyes that make him weak in the knees. The corner of his mouth lifts at the sight of your fucked out state, your hair is messy, there are imprints from the cushion on the cheek you were lying on, and the wet trails from your tears are almost dried.

He leans down and kisses you slowly and deeply as his fingers tangle themselves in your hair, his other hand gently cupping your cheek. Jesus, he doesn’t know how you do it but his dick is already twitching in his pants so he breaks the kiss because otherwise, he’d have to fuck you again. He pulls you up on your feet and bends down to pick up your bag, slinging it over your shoulder before his hands fall to your hips. You smile and adjust the strap.

“So, when will I see you in the new number?” he smirks.

“Well, I didn’t even get to pick any,” you reply with a smile and a raised eyebrow. “And I have Mrs. Harper next and I wouldn’t dare to use my phone during her class since her punishments are actual punishments.”

“Are you saying my punishments are ineffective?” he feigns shock.

“I’m just saying if you fucked every student for using their phone, they’d be doing it on purpose, professor.”

He laughs and pulls you closer. “That would be exhausting. But those kinds of punishments are reserved for my favorite student only.” 

“Should I be worried? You seemed pretty delighted with Amelia.” you joke, but half of you is a bit insecure because Amelia is a pretty girl with glowing skin and a brain big enough to impress him. And like the amazing person Andy is, he sees right through you and gives you an adoring smile before his lips touch your forehead, your eyes fluttering close. 

“You are my favorite student. Nobody else,” he assures you once he pulls away. 

Your smile widens and your belly twists at his sappiness, but you wrinkle your nose when you suddenly become aware of the slickness between your legs.

“I need my panties back.”

He snorts and shakes his head.

“I’m gonna keep them.” Your jaw drops. You have two more classes today, you can’t go that long with Andy’s cum leaking out of you! “Oh, you thought your punishment was over? I want you to come over to my place right after school. And don’t even think about going home to change.” His stern voice is back and he takes your chin between his fingers.

“I hope you finished your paper. We have a long weekend in front of us.”

the end.

a/n2: thank you for reading!!!!!❤️❤️my other works can be find under #writer luci !☺️

[boxboysandotherwhump]

Jake guard dog AU part 2

Part two of the guard dog au is out and about. :D

Poor Jake all scared and in pain. It‘s so good that Chris is there to help him <3 (honestly though giving Jake a pet name in this chapter annoyed the hell out of my brain.But some of you might be able to guess who’s pet he was based on that ;)   )

Thank you again @ashintheairlikesnow for letting me play with your babies. I love them so much.

CW: fucked up head space, past abuse mentioned, past dehumanization mention,

He had pleaded, begged for his new master to not abandon him, too, but his begging had never been good enough, never earned him the reward of mercy, and so the man had left.

Leaving him with a regretful smile for a parting gift and one last order.

“Be good for Natalie, okay? She‘ll take good care of you. I promise, she is safe.”

Safe.

That‘s what handler Ferrick had promised his owner would be. It felt like a life time ago since he had heard this lie. Believed it, stupid and doe-eyed.  

Longed for it be true. Even now.

A longing that lived eternally in his bones, festered there since the beginning of a life that had been torn from his heart. Discarded like withered children‘s book pages.

Only this longing had remained. Survived the coldness of white rooms.

Vidar was cold now, too.

Icy morning chill creeped from the hard floorboards into his aching body, as he lay wedged between the old couch and the living room wall.  Legs screaming in pain that wouldn‘t settle after he had all but fallen of the furniture and crawled behind it.

They had put him on the couch, but he knew better. Knew that dog‘s belonged on the floor. Knew not to fail this test.

The man who had scraped him off the street, half dying and delirious from pain had told him to be good for this Natalie woman, so he would try.

What else could do he do right now anyway?! Incapacitated as he was.

He curled up, as much as his throbbing limbs and his tiny hiding space allowed. Fighting against the exhaustion that gnawed at his mind and trying to drown out the fear, hot on its heels.

He had been promised the woman was safe, but no one said anything about the upstairs-people. Those big green eyes that had peered down at him.

Like he was some kind of animal, to gawk at.

Because that‘s exactly what you are.

Kneel dog.

Fetch.

Give paw.

Good boy.

Only that he wasn‘t. He wasn‘t good at all, or his master wouldn‘t have thrown him away. A quiet sob escaped into the houses silence and the dog pressed his trembling lips together until they hurt. A tight white line in a pale bruised face.

____________________________________________________

„Where is-“

„There, there there there behind the the couch.“

„Tristan give him some space, will you?“

Vidar‘s eyes snapped open. Light blue staring right up into bottomless green.

He flinched back. Head hitting the wall with a dull thud. Sharp pain radiated through his skull. Made him growl. Cracked lips pulled back into a vicious snarl.

The big green eyes drinking him in grew even wider and their holder stumbled back with a quiet gasp.

He looked scared.

Good!

And incredibly... young?

„Tristan.“ Miss Natalie laid a tanned hand on the boys shoulder. Work roughened fingers squeezing gently. „Will you be a dear and get our newcomer something to drink?“

„O- o- o- okay.“

The boy nodded, strawberry blond hair flying everywhere as he jumped to his feet in one gracious movement and vanished out the door in flurry of limbs.  

What had his new master called this place again?

A safe house?

„For people like you, you know. Other... pets without a home.“

Could it be?

But this Tristan looked way to young to be a pet.

Memories of black batons and steel tip boots flashed through his mind and something hot and heavy twisted inside his gut.

The thought of metal prongs digging in the boys pale neck made him sick. All of a sudden.

Reminded him of Nicky in the bed of this sick fuck when-

„So.“ Miss Natalie‘s voice cut through his fogging rage like a light house siren and he snapped back to attention. Watching her crouch down a few feet in front of him, hands folded. „How about we get you back onto the couch, hm? It must be cold on the floor.“

He dropped his gaze, unsure of what to do. Dogs didn‘t belong on the furniture. He knew that. But dogs also shouldn‘t disobey their owner. Was this woman his new owner now? She must be. Right? Could he ask? Should he dare? Sir had hated when he had spoken without permission.

Please not the muzzle again.

„Not talking today, honey? That‘s fine.“ The smile in her voice sparked the hope that he had made the right decision.

„Can can can, can he not talk?“ Tristan took a few tentative steps into the living room. Long fingers wrapped around a steaming mug.  

The smell of milk and honey tickled his nose. He craned his neck, blinked up through blond lashes.

Tristan came closer.

Miss Natalie plugged the mug from Tristan‘s hands and set it on the floor. Pushed it over to him.

„It can be hard on some days. Impossible really. Just give him time.“

Vidar didn‘t look at the mug. His eyes were trained on the teenagers solemn face as he nodded.

„Yes. I I I I know day‘s like, like that.“

Tristan plopped down in front of him, tugged his feet over his thighs so that they nearly rested against his abdomen and leaned forward a bit. Fingers tapping softly over his shins.

A nearly conspiratorial grin danced around his lips. Green eyes sparkling warm. „I lose my my my words too. Sometimes. When when I‘m angry or or or or scared. I now it‘s it‘s it‘s scary but don‘t don‘t don‘t worry about that. They they they‘ll come back.“

The first smile in forever creeped on Vidar‘s face, at that. Barley more than the twitch of his lips.

No wonder the boy had to use all his words at once, when he had to make up for days he had none at all.

Tristan mirrored his smile ten fold. Early morning sun dipping in his dimple. Catching in strawberry blond hair.

Long fingers walked up to the mug and nudged it even closer. „My my my my Mom makes hot, hot milk for me when when when I‘m upset. It al- al- always helps.“

His own rough fingertips slid over the floorboards, feeling their faint texture before his hands wrapped around the mug. He lifted it to his lips, let the heat of the drink seep into his freezing fingers and took a tentative sip.

Tristan‘s smile widened as he watched him. Swaying softly forward and back. His pleased hums sunk right into his heart, sweet as the honey milk.

[novelbeetle]

Empire of Storms: Spoilers ahead…

- I have a lot of feelings when this book is concerned. There was so much but also heartbreak. So mich heartbreak!

- My feelings toward Aedion didn‘t change they just got bigger. I love him. He has sometimes a weird sense of honor and can ger frustrated very easily. He has so many redeeming qualities. I was definitely a goner after his speech to Lysandra on the beach in Skull‘s Bay. Come on that was just amazing! His rage was ao justified in the end when Aelin was taken and Rowan and Lysandra explained their plan with her shifting into Aelin. He deserves better. I really am rooting for Aedion and Lysandra but they have a lot of work to do.

- Dorian‘s behaviour sometimes struck me as weird. Don‘t get me wrong I love him but sometimes he was weird. At least I think he is coping okay with the whole aftermatch of his Valg possession. The whole dynamic between him and Manon *chef‘s kiss* i wanted more! I need more! I am absolutely not okay with the whole either Aelin or Dorian have to sacrifice themselves for the greater good… What I definitely loved sooo much is that he left with the witches. Just saying phantom hands… that‘s hot

- speaking of Manon what a story she had. I mean I disliked her grandmother anyway but now it‘s on sight with that bitch. Come on!! Order Asterin‘s execution?! That really shook me and made me very anxious especially because there were chapters from the others pov. In between! For a hot second there i was very scared that Manon would die. I think I haven‘t been this happy for characters to meet like i was when Abraxos dropped Manon near Aelin, Dorian and the rest. Her heritage was also a shock. It makes so much sense now why her grandmother hated her mom so much and why she treated Manon like she did. Again I need more of Manon and Dorian

- So I was hoping for a lot of happy moments for Elide well… there were some happy and wholesome moments but the whole thing ended in my heart being shattered!!! She is an absolute badass. She knew someone was tracking her, she killed some of those Ilken and then she broke through Lorcan‘s hard shell. Their dynamic is fantastic and I was so happy when they kissed in the stone marshes. The way she begged Maeve, Lorcan and Manon to do anything made me so sad but I was also so proud of her. She really is becoming her own strong person. I really want her and Lorcan to patch everything up. Is that so much to ask for?

- well Lorcan is such goner. He has it bad for Elide and I am soooo here for it. He went through so much character development. It was shitty of him to summon Maeve because then everything went from „we have a great team here“ to „what kind of fucking bullshit is this“ I understand his motive. He did it because he was scared that anything would happen to Elide. It was still shitty as fuck. Now he really needs to patch things up and help Rowan find Aelin. Him being released from the blood oath is great even though it may hurts him right now it is a good thing.

- Lysandra is a badass and I love her. She just needs to patch things up with Aedion and then I can be happy again! That is all I‘m going to say. She is amazing and I love her so much!

- Prince Rowan Whitethorn Galathynius is amazing. He is such a good dude! He is there to protect and help. The way he got his cousins to help against Maeve armada. The way he asked where his wife was fucking chills! He is it and i want one for myself please…

- Aelin is great but to be honest I get a bit sick of her constant scheming. I know it is her thing and she doesn‘t want to burden anyone with it but still maybe she should just tell them of some of her plans. Complete shock when we found out that she has to sacrifice her life to save them all. I am not okay with that. And then she also surrendered to save Elide it got me. It really did. The only thing that gives me hope is that Fenrys is there with her. He can try to help her in some way and get her away. She is so strong.

- All in all I really enjoyed the book. I thought Queen of shadows was great (which it is) but this book is also great! I kind of don‘t want to read Tower of Dawn now with that cliffhanger. I really hope the next on is not as bad as some people say. Chaol is not my favourite person sometimes I really disliked him. Please tell me the book has some good parts…

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ / 5

[91percentpynch]

the cut that always bleeds - kevaaron au pt 3

kejerejean stans? this one is for you. no seriously this one is out of jean‘s point of view? cuz honestly i love that hoe so much. as always get your tissues ready guys. this is actually kinda long? and a mess? and no one beta read it so if there are mistakes or it doesn‘t make sense i‘m sorry!! this is not that sad? tw: mention of murder, mention of physically hurting someone, mention of stabbing, mention of the nest, mention of trauma

check this out to find the other parts:)

Jean has always been a light sleeper. He had to be in order to survive the horrors of Evermore.

So naturally the sobs - as silent as they might have been - woke him up. His eyes opened at once, he sat straight up. Almost automatically he got to his feet and left the room to get to Kevin.

After all, comforting Kevin was like breathing to him.

Jeremy followed Jean, because he would always follow Jean. Jeremy was like a moth and Jean was the light. Wherever he went Jer would follow.

So they went to Kevin‘s room. The striker laid in his bed, curled up, phone in his hand, uncontrollable sobs escaping his mouth.

„I see you took the call this time“, Jean said, surprisingly gentle.

„I wanted to end it. I wanted to have a clear cut. So tell me, why does the cut still bleed?“, Kevin whispered, his voice barely audible.

„Because it‘s a cut that always bleeds“, Jeremy told Kevin as he came closer, carefully and ever so gentle placing his hands on the other boy‘s back.

„He said he wants me to come back to him“, Kevin whispered while holding onto himself as if to try to stop himself from falling apart. „He told me he misses me. That he only gets high when he misses me“

It was quiet in the dark room, shadows were dancing, just as Aaron and Kevin used to dance in the dead of night underneath the night sky.

„You did the right thing Kev“, Jean replied in French while he got into the Bed behind Kevin. Just like they used to do in the Nest.

When Kevin was in his arms he began to hum a French lullaby into his ear.

Jeremy joined them after a second of admiring his beautiful boyfriend and the broken boy in his arms.

„Dude, do you want something? Hot coca? A special Knoxian hug? Us to get Andrew to gut that bastard? Wait, hold on. I forgot. Twin brother. Well, I can gut him for you? Andrew and this is a word by word quote told be once ‚You‘re like a little unicorn in a world full of wolfs with razor sharp teeths, learn to gut the wolfs, stay safe‘, so he taught me how to stab someone? Yeah okay that is not the topic right now, I can still gut Aaron though. I mean Andrew would try to hurt me, but then again I‘m his best friend so he does not have the rights to gut me, right?“, Jeremy offered him a toothy grin, while his hand wandred to his neck rubbing it nervously.

„Can you please not gut him? First of all: Andrew already tried to choke me once when Josten was in danger and I told them where he was, cause apparently yOu DoN‘t KeEp ThOsE tHiNgS tO yOuRsElF yOu FuCkInG mOrOn. I think you do keep those things to yourself if the other option is to get fucking murdered by the mafia??? But what do I know, am I right? After all I‘m just a narcistic, Exy-obsessed asshole without a personality. Bonus I have anxiety, panic attacks, probably depression and I‘m unlovable“, Kevin mumbled into his pillow, the voices of the other foxes, of the other teams inside of his head.

„Did they tell you that?“, Jeremy asked, not quite able to hide the sadness and pain in his voice.

„Doesn‘t eveyone think that?“, Kevin asked. „I mean I think they tend to forget that the woman who gave birth to me, the last woman who geniuely loved me besides maybe Abby, invented the job. I think they tend to forget that the fucking mafia killed her when they found out I‘m not theirs by nature, so the only solution was apparently fucking murder. Then they kidnapped me, brainwashed and tortured me to the point where all I knew was Exy. Oh and maybe they also tend to forget that Ravens were only ever allowed to do Exy, if you were privilegded enough sleep, and do more Exy“

„Kevin you are so much more than that“, Jean whispered into Kevin‘s ear while pressing him against his chest. Just as they used to do in the Nest. „I might be mad at you, because you left me alone with those psychopaths. I used to think you didn‘t care about me. But you were just like me, okay with less scars and less you know. However I cannot say I wouldn‘t have done the same. I understand you now, Kevin. And please, please stop saying those things. And now let us cuddle you and let Jer go through his ridiculous post break-up list. We‘re gonna cuddle you and all you have to do is trying to fall asleep. Used to help me when I was alone at USC. Could only sleep properly when someone held me. Well, Jeremy. Tomorrow we‘ll shove unhealthy food down your throat and watch Downton Abbey or whatever those historcial dramas you love so much are called. While stroking your hand or whatever you‘re into big boy. Afterwards we‘ll take the dogs out and force you to watch the fucking sunset. And I‘ll hold your fucking hand“

Kevin supposed the middle of the night was the time of long lost truths. „Okay“, he mumbled while he moved closer to Jean. Replacing his smell with Jean‘s. It took him a while to fall asleep but he managed.

At the same time Jeremy said „Mi amor, I love you, I really do, but that was literally the most romantic thing you said in the past two years? That is way more romantic than ANY date you ever planned for me? Rude? The audacity?“

„Moi soleil, you don‘t have the ‚cult kidnapped me and tortured me‘ card you can pull, you get the bonus treatmeant of any other people. Besides I literally have matching tattoos with you? I drew you like multiply times? I wrote like a dozen poems and at LEAST one short story? I wrote you a fucking lullaby? You have no right to complain right now, or you‘ll loose your kissing privileges and I give them to Kevin“

„Eww gross“, Kevin mumbled.

„I don‘t remeber you saying that back in the Nest“, Jean replied, poking his cheek.

Kevin didn‘t have the energy to answer. It was a long day. Sleep could have him for the day. Death’s little sister might claim him for the night.

This night he dreamed about Aaron. Strong arms around his waist. Golden eyes locking with smaragd ones. They were on some lonely beach, kissing lazily while the water kissed their feet. It was a beautiful day. Not as beautiful as Aaron, but then again nothing would ever be as beautiful as this specific piece of art. Everything was alright. Everything was good. Why couldn‘t it be the real Aaron and the real Kevin on that beach.

At about noon Kevin woke up to a drooling Jeremy on his stomach and the smell of waffles and soft French swearing in the kitchen. Softly Kevin woke Jeremy up.

„Sorry I always end up on weird angles and drooling on random guys. Jean used to get so mad when I fell asleep in his lap. But you can‘t take him serious when he looks with you with heart eyes trying to be Mad, can you? Anyways we should probably go to him and help him? Oh wait hold on a hot second there. I‘m banned from the kitche, so we can sleep? Right? Right?“

„I hate to break this to you Jer, but it‘s noon. So, no we cannot sleep. You can choose my clothes, though. I know you love going through my stuff and playing dress the doll, Kevin Day edition“, Kevin almost smiled at Jeremy, when he looked up at him pouting.

Then he remembered another blonde boy, pouting at him when he told him no. Another constellation of freckles around another, straight, perfect nose. Sinful lips softly turned up, trying to look mad. Hazel eyes instead of ocean blue ones. Messy blonde curles, instead of soft badly dyed ginger ones. Strong arms instead of lean ones covered in flower tattoos. God, Kevin missed his Aaron.

No, not his. Not anymore

„Okay, but you have to wear to fab outfit I‘ll throw in your face“, Jeremy gave him another easy, toothy grin.

Slowly the other boy got out of bed and went over to the cabet. Slowly Jer went through Kevin‘s cloths. After a while he slowly turned around, holding a jersey that is obviously by far too small for Kevin in front of his face. „What is that? Why do you still have his jersey? Babe, you gotta get rid of that, rather sooner than later“

Jeremy had the weird habit of calling his friends babe, baby, dude or bro. Before Jean he called his boyfriends bro or dude as well, but Jean was so confused by it he quickly stopped doing it.

„First of all: I‘m a weak ass bitch, it smelled of it. And secondly maybe I wanna stab it once I‘m over the phase where I‘m like madly missing him?. I‘d just put it into a pillow, stab at it like a maniac and then set it on fire. I didn‘t grow up with a psychopath as my supposed best friend for nothing Jer“

„Okay? Well I got your clothes. And you‘ll look amazing, cause it‘s the FOX ONSIE I GOT YOU!!! I‘ll wear my onsie as well, and I‘ll force Jean to wear his one as well!! Much fun!! Much wholesome!!“

So that‘s how Kevin Day, queen of Exy, landed sandwiched between his childhood crush and long life crush on their couch, watching Downton Abbey with a plate of waffles on his lap. This was nice. He might had actually enjoyed it, if this wasn‘t his and Aaron‘s show. They used to watch it, cry over it together, make out while watching it.

Thank God didn‘t actually touch him while watching Downton Abbey, he was good at daydreaming. Kevin would just had preteneded that it was Aaron and he thought him breathing Aaron‘s name was the last thing any of them needed today.

After their Downton Abbey marathon they ordered pizza, against Kevin‘s better judgement. Another traditon Kevin shared with Aaron. At finals Aaron would often forget to eat and Kevin was too big of a mess to be bothered to cook so he would end up ordering something every single day and feeding it Aaron while he studied on the floor. Occasionally he would earn a soft kiss, growing hungrier when the night grew darker. God Kevin missed the soft lips on his own.

Kevin would have enjoyed the beach, wouldn‘t he be dressed in a fox onsie, holding hands with a 6“5 guy who looked like he both could and would kill you in a unicorn onsie holding two tiny dogs in his other hand and with a 5“4 dude in a matching unicorn onsie with two dogs that were almost bigger than him.

At least this didn‘t remind him on Aaron.

Well, actually. The way the ocean softly kissed the sand, reminded him of his dream. And of the endless trips to the beach, sleeping in the car, Aaron on top of him. Lazy kisses and warm hugs. It was the first place Aaron took Kevin after their rehab. It was the first night they spent together, as sober men. Well, not sober per se. But drunk and high on each others love. It might had been the most painful memory of the day. God he missed those strong arms around his waist.

Nontheless the pain got less, he felt almost numb. Kevin liked feeling numb. Nothing hurt when you feel numb.

The sunset was beautiful. It reminded him of golden hairs, freckles standing against golden skin, soft lips at his ears, his neck, the corner of his lips.

„Aaron you‘re supposed to look at the sunset, you shithead“, Kevin used to smile down at him. „But I‘m already looking at the most beautfiul thing this world has to offer“, Aaron replied smoothly, locking eyes with Kevin.

When the moon took the place of his long lost lover they decided to go back.

It was safe to say that no one dared to think that someone would wait for them there. Especially not the one person they tried to avoid by all means the entire day.

„You said to stop calling. Never mentioned face to face conversations“, a husky voice said. And Kevin‘s world stopped.

[writingjoycebyers]

Twice in her life — or: the last days he saw her smile

(Joyce Byers x Jim Hopper - observations of a friendship — a one shot)

warnings: a bit angsty, mentions sex (not explicit)

Reblogs, comments and feedback make me really happy. Let me know if you like it or what else you'd like to read. No one asked for this. My brain just came up with it. ✨❤️👀 There's a little bonus at the end and I gotta say it's a little off canon maybe. Have fun✨❤️

Enjoy the read...

Joyce Byers had been left twice in her life.

One might think it's a story about Lonnie. But no, it's most definetely not. Lonnie doesn't count. Lonnie is a side character. She left Lonnie, kicked him out all by herself after all those years that would have been wasted if they hadn't been for her boys. Her boys were her gift, and the only thing she'd ever thank Lonnie for, to some degree. He helped create them, but she had been the one to form them. She was the one she should thank for, really.

No, Joyce Byers had been left twice in her life, and it had been much more subtle events than her large fights with Lonnie, making her the main topic of the gossip all those midaged ladies were spreading at the grocery store, the doctor's office, the elementary school. You heard it? someone called the police to Joyce Byers house.

Joyce Byers had been left twice in her life, and nobody had really noticed, but her.

The first time, she had just turned nineteen. It was a rather warm day in September, and life in Hawkins couldn't be easier. High-school was done, the heat of the summer was still lingering in the air, and her dark hair was still damp from swimming in the lake as she rode around Hawkins with her best friend, Jim Hopper. Or... Was he her best friend still? She sometimes couldn't tell, couldn't put a label on it, when he was kissing her senseless in the back of his dad's old truck, parked in the dark at Lover's Lake, parked in the shade of a large oak tree — so that although it was the middle of the night, and no one would come there anyways, they'd have a bit of privacy, a roof of leaves covering their clumsy attempt on passing first base. Friends didn't do that, right?

They rode along the streets of Hawkins, and Joyce had her legs propped up on the dashboard of his car, puffing away on one of Hop‘s cigarettes. They tasted awful, but she did not mind as long as it were his. She felt connected to him through that cig. Tonight was the night. Tonight, she‘d tell him - tell him that she wanted to be more than friends, more than friends who make out occasionally. She wanted to finally look into his eyes and work up the courage to say Jim, I like you a little more than expected.

She looked at him from the side, his hands holding the steering wheel, his gaze fixed on the road as day turned into night with a wonderfully orange sky. Tonight was the night she‘d say it. Jim, you make my fucking heart race.

Jim looked beautiful to her, peaceful and innocent, like he didn‘t know that outside Hawkins there was a whole world — both good and bad — that was waiting for them and looming like a dark shadow at the same time. For him, this dark shadow could mean draft cards, his ticket off to fight a war he himself hadn‘t started, a conflict neither him nor Joyce would ever support or understand. She knew it could be his duty to leave one day, but she could still breathe every day his number didn‘t come up. As long as Hopper didn‘t have to take the trip, she wouldn‘t have to take hers either: Her trip down the road of loneliness, facing the fact that she couldn‘t afford college, being left behind with the mess she had to call her parents. She knew he wasn‘t all that innocent though, stealing booze from his dad‘s wine cellar, sharing the bottle with her shamelessly on a friday night. She knew he wasn‘t all that innocent when he pressed his body into hers, parked under that old oak tree, and she could feel his need and want press against her while he silently accepted her wish to explore second base, but not enter the third one just yet. He kissed her, and told her that it didn‘t matter how far he had gone with other girls - that all that mattered was her needs. That specific night under the oak tree though, Joyce had realised that the tingling feeling in her belly was growing more and more, and that she wouldn‘t be able to hold back for much longer. I‘ve never done it, Jim. Her whispers had been low and husky, and he had caressed her cheek as she had thought of the moment she had once caught him and Chrissy Carpenter in the back of the blonde cheerleader's car. I know, Joycie, don‘t worry about that, one day we‘ll take it slow, just give me a sign. Tonight would be the night she‘d give him said sign, she thought, as he took a turn into the road she lived on.

He pulled up into her driveway, slowing down to park in front of her house. Tonight was the night.Tonight he‘d tell her - tell her that she meant the world to him, but that he‘d have to go, and that he‘d understand if she didn‘t wait. Tell her that he‘d try to write, no matter what. Joyce, I should have told you sooner. He had kept it to himself for weeks, had just not found the words to break the news to her. The letter had been in his mailbox one rainy Monday afternoon, telling him to fight a war he neither could nor wanted to understand. A war that would send him to hell and leave Joyce in the small little bubble of a heaven that was Hawkins, Indiana. He was a coward, he couldn‘t tell her, not when they were riding in his car, or munching on a burger at the diner, not whilst smoking on her windowsill and especially not whilst kissing her in the dark, parked in the shadow of the old oak tree. He just couldn‘t, but tonight was the night. Joycie, I gotta go to Vietnam. My train leaves tomorrow.

Jim pulled the keys, and she looked at him. It was a ritual already: They’d spend their day at the lake, he‘d drive her home long after dark and as her parents were barely ever home anyways, he‘d follow her up to her room under the roof and they‘d sit by the window, smoking and kissing and exchanging little secrets. Jim loved Joyce, and Joyce loved Jim. They both knew it, they just never said a word.

The two friends, him, tall and blonde and her, small and brunette, took their usual spot by her large window. He was just about to light the last smoke from his pack, when Joyce reached for the cigarette, her hand grazing his as she took it, putting it aside. She kissed Jim with such force than that he nearly lost track of time and place. Was this still Hawkins, Indiana?

They kissed, and kissed ... and kissed some more, before she finally pulled away, taking his large hand into her small one. Their fingers were intertwined, her thumb drawing small circles to the side of his hand. Dark doe eyes met blue ones, and she breathed in once more before saying it: “Jim, I think... you‘re my best friend. But I also think... I‘m in love with you.“

Her words came out all in one breath, more a sighed whisper than a real sentence, but she had said them. Her pulse was pounding as she waited for him to respond. She had practiced the worst case already: That‘s okay, Jim, you do not have to love me back. I just hope we can stay friends?

But then his hand found her cheek and he pulled her closer, whispering an I love you, Joycie, right onto her lips as he found hers, grazing them softly. It felt like a gentle hello to Joyce, like this was the start of something new, although she had kissed him a hundred times before. She couldn‘t know it was a goodbye. Quickly, their kisses became more passionate, hungry and loving. Does he love me, she wants to know, how can she know if he loves her so?

That night, Jim Hopper made love to Joyce Horowitz — sweet, gentle and slow love. He touched her in a way he had never touched anyone before, softer, more tender - out of love and out guilt, his conscience forcing him to treat her even better, to worship her body to balance out the fact that he couldn‘t be true to her. His feelings for her were so strong that they held him back from breaking her heart - although it would in the end have to be broken, if he wanted that or not.

They shared that last cigarette afterwards, the one that had been waiting on the window sill. They‘d not share another one until almost twenty years later.

That night, Joyce Horowitz made love to Jim Hopper — sweet, gentle and slow love. She touched him in a way she had never touched anyone before, soft, tender and a bit shy as she explored his body and her own, further discovering the hot, tingling feeling in her lower belly as their clothes sprawled out on the floor and their bodies intertwined under her comforter. It‘s in his kiss.

Joyce fell asleep in Jim‘s arms, breathing softly as she felt safe and secure of the fact that he loved her too, that they were more than friends and that this was just the start.

Jim watched Joyce fall asleep in his arms, pulling her as close as he could once more. He wanted to remember this moment forever, capture every little detail for the nights to come in which he‘d sleep somewhere in the jungle of the war, with so many miles separating him from the girl he loved. He studied her face in the dim light of her room before falling asleep for a few hours himself.

When Joyce woke up the next morning, she already began to smile with her eyes still closed. It was a rainy Monday morning, she could hear the raindrops fall against her window in a steady rythm - It was soothing and she was ready to cuddle up again. She turned around, reaching for Jim, only to find the bed empty. She sat up, confused and still half asleep, stumbling across a note.

- Joy, I should have told you sooner. I won‘t forget our summer. My train leaves today, I‘m gone into training for Nam. Please don‘t come looking for me at the station. I’ll be gone already. I‘ll write. Jim. -

Joyce Horowitz had been left for the first time in her life, broken and flustered, unable to move or cry for hours and hours. She sat in bed, the note in her hands, and she cursed Jim, the world, the war and love - and even herself for falling for him. She didn‘t believe there was a feeling on earth that could be more horrible. Joyce Horowitz had been left for the first time in her life, and she had no clue there would be a second one.

......... 20 years later.........

Joyce looked at Jim one more time as he stood next to the machine, tears in their eyes, both his and hers.

I love you.

I love you.

Leaning to the side, she reached for the keys once more. She stopped breathing as she turned them, held her breath as lights blended her vision, time stopping around her and then... he was gone.

Joyce Byers had been left twice in her life.

_____________________________________

Thanks for reading everyone. I appreciate every kind of constructive feedback. Feel free to send asks or messages if you wanna talk about this little piece here, or if you have any other Joyce asks or prompts!

Bonus: a little mood board I made

Sources: there's a reference to the shoop shoop song. Pics are all from pinterest if anyone Needs the sources. I don't own anything related to ST or Winona Ryder. Credit goes to the respective owners and creates, I just wrote this little fic for fun.

[loveme-likeme-hateme]

In addition to my „Boys I‘m obsessed with“ post, I would like to share some gorgeous woman with you guys. Fun fact, most of the time my boyfriend snd I are watching TV or whatever and there is a beautiful girl/woman, I don‘t get jealous. Mostly because my boyfriend is like „Nope, I got a girlfriend. No fucks given. Walk by and let me be.“ (😂). Actually I am the one going on about how beautiful she is and so on... Anyways he‘s always like „No thanks. I choose life!“ 😂 okay okay enough about my relationship, here are some beautiful human beings you could say I am obsessed with:

Veronica Lodge and Betty Cooper

Some of you may have read my post about the first episode of Riverdale season 5. If you read it you kinda should have gotten the idea that I love Veronica. And I do. Don‘t blame me. But I also love Betty, even though her latest decisions are problematic. I do love their friendship and I wish there would be more bestie scenes with both of them. Makes me kind of sad. Nevermind I‘m fine :) But anyways those two woman and their actresses are just 😍

Caroline Forbes (TVD)

Oh. My. God. I am so in love. Actually when I first started watching TVD I hated the way she acted but her character development was just perfection, let‘s be honest. I kind of saw myself in her so I could relate to her more than to any other character in the show. So yeah... Caroline Forbes my darlings. My all time favorite TVD girl😍

Rebekah Mikaelson (The Originals)

Please tell me you love her too. I mean look at her 👀 Do I really have to day anything else? Oh god she is soo fine 🔥 I remember the actress playing one of Emilys love interests in Pretty Little Liars and I loved her too.

Hanna Marin and Ario Montgomery (Pretty Little Liars)

The first time I watched PLL Aris was my favourite. I loved her looks, her attitude, almost everything. Don‘t get me wrong I still love her and she is sooo goddamn beautiful, but as I told you in one of my my recent posts Hanna Marin is my favourite liar. She is equally beautiful and she is so kind, loving and funny 😍 I love it. If I could have Hanna Marin as one of my closest friends, I would be more than just happy. 🥰 so yeah... Hanna and Aria👀❤️

Bella & season 3 Cleo + season 3 Rikki (H2O)

Ok ok... hear my out! This is one of my favourite childhood TV shows and I was obsessed with mermaids. I even wanted to make my own movie and made my mom buy me a memaid tail so I could wear it in the pool. Yep... pretty embarrassing I know 😂 But hey, I was young and lived my best life so... anyways. I actually think season 1 and season 2 were better than season 3 because Emma was an OG and when she left it wasn‘t the same, BUT I liked it that they were older and more grown-up in season 3, because Cleo annoyed me so god damn much especially in season one, but her in season 3... 🥰 Also Bella was a little too „perfect“ for my taste but she was beautiful and kind so yeah... Just beautiful! All 3 of them!😍

Blair Waldorf (Gossip Girl)

Oh yeah... She is the crazy bitch and we love her! Or at least I do. I loved her from the beginning and I never stopped. This girl is gorgeous, strong, extremely powerful and mayyybe a bit crazy but come on... Do I have to point out Barney Stinsons Crazy-Hot-Scale. She is my favourite main character and please don‘t start with me about Serena. Not going to end well. I only liked serena in season 1 and even then she was annoying so yeah... definitely Blair 😍

Rory Gilmore (Gilmore Girls)

Yes I know her character development was a little bit disappointing but I could never get over season 1 to 3 Rory 😍 She was perfect in my eyes. Beautiful, smart, funny... She was my role model in my young teenage years and even after I realized I don‘t want to be like her anymore she was an important role model for me. And I will always be Team Jess, you know it!😉😍 Never getting over the fact they weren‘t endgame 😭❤️

Padme (Star Wars)

Uff 😳🔥 Anakin and Padme are both sooo freaking hot... good genes. Anyways You guys know I am obsessed with Anakin and now you know that I think Padme is freaking beautiful, but I‘m going to be honest. Their love story especially in the third movie war just forced and they had no chemistry. Thinking about the freaking chemistry Kilo and Rey had... uff... you remember the touch of their fingers? Oh god i can‘t 😳🔥😍 Anyways, Padme is smoking 🔥😍

Octavia Blake and Clarke Griffin (The 100)

They are both fighters and strong beautiful woman. They had to go through so much pain and they both came out stronger than they were before. I loved The 100 but I have never read the books, maybe I should 🤔 Anyways I love them 😍

Okay I am pretty sure that there are more beautiful woman that I just forgot (shame on me) and there are millions of beautiful people out there. Go give them some love! ❤️

Love you guys ❤️🥰

[mothra-mcyt]

☾ "Maybe this side isn't too bad..." ☽

Chapter 2

No Warnings because this is more comfort and fluff

Pov: Technoblade

Link to ao3

(I’m also sorry for any errors english isn’t my first language)

The icy wind blew against my face making me squint my eyes together as i pulled the red cape tighter around my shoulders in hopes to keep myself at least somewhat warm.

None of us had expected the snow storm to be this strong and last this long.

After discussing what we were gonna do now with my winged friend i decided to check up on the dogs to make sure that they still have enough food and that they weren‘t too cold.

Stepping into the little hut i shook my head to get the snow off from my pink haired head. A smile formed on my lips seeing a few dogs cuddling together in a corner looking like a white ball of fur. Walking over to the feeding bowls i kneeled down to expect if the food was enough and still eatable.

A groan of pain left my mouth when i stood up straight again feeling the pain from past injuries flow through my knees.

 “Check on Ranboo!“

 “Ranboo might be hurt!“

 “Water hurts endermans help him!“

Oh shit right. The enderboi doesn‘t really have a good house yet and with the amount of snow that is falling he probably isn‘t doing too good. I should check up on him. Well time to die from social interaction.

Stepping out of the house i flinched back feeling small flocks of snow hitting my face leaving a cold wet feeling behind. With my glasses sitting on my nose and protecting my eyes from the icy wind i began walking to the little wood shack feeling the snow crunching under my feet. Curses leaving my mouth when i felt the storm getting stronger i started picking up the pace wanting to get back into the warm house as soon as possible.

When i finally was near the little hut the enderman hybrids mouth left my mouth and my feet stopped inches deep snow.

„Ranboo?“

After waiting for a few seconds for an answer my brows furrowed in worry when nothing came from the younger. Opening up the spruce gate i made my way over to the body laying under a small blanket. My hand landed on the boy‘s shoulder wanting to shake the boy out of his unresponsive state but i flinched back when i noticed how freezing he was. Not quite being able to hold back the worry from my voice i called out his name.

„Ranboo?!“

When i again didn‘t get an answer from him i put my hand on his shoulder again and made him lay on his back. A gasped left my mouth when seeing how pale the hybrid was even on the enderman side of his face. Curses started leaving my mouth and i put my fingers against his throat searching for a pulse, a sign of life from the younger boy.

„Come on memory boy don’t die one me here. Please you can‘t do that to Phil...“

A relieved sigh left my lips when i felt the weak pulse on the side of his neck. Not even thinking about what i was doing i took of my red cape and wrapped it around the shaking weak body trying to at least make him somewhat warm. Putting my right arm under his knees i put my other hand on his back. With a groan i mustered up my strength and picked up the tall anxious boy. A surprised noise left my mouth when i felt how light he was clearly not having eaten anything real in some time which made my worry grow even more.

Not even thinking about walking back to the warm house slowly i started running feeling the wind blow against my arms weren‘t covered by my cape anymore.

„Please Ranboo hold on or I’ll fucking stab you.“

After only a few minutes of running i finally arrived at my home and slammed open the door immediately and made my way inside closing the door with my foot.

„Phil! Come quick and bring a healing potion!“

Looking down at the the shivering hybrid in my arms i quickly grabbed a folded blanket from one of my chests and wrapped it around his upper body while struggling to hold him in my arms. Hearing quick footsteps coming near i looked over to the ladder and saw my winged friend coming down with a few potions in his arms.

„What happened Techno- Oh shit! Ranboo are you okay?!“

Phil‘s eyes widened in concern when he saw the half enderman freezing in my arms. Walking over the blond haired man put a hand on Ranboo‘s forehead a hiss leaving his mouth when feeling how cold he was.

„I found him like this laying on his bed. He‘s unconscious but fortunately he still has a pulse. It‘s very weak though.“

Pointing over to the ladder i realised what the shorter man wanted from me and brought the younger up the ladder as safely as possible.

„Lie him down next to the fireplace while i go and grab some more pillows and blankets to warm him up and make him more comfortable. Also here take the healing potions.“

As gentle as possible i put him down next to the crackling fire and laid down a pillow under his head to prevent him from getting even more hurt. Grabbing one oh the healing potions Phil gave me i brought it down to the enderman hybrids mouth trying my best to make him drink it without spilling it. After only a few seconds i could see the burn marks that the snow made on his cheeks fade away. A hopeful smile appeared on my lips a curse leaving my lips when i realised it.

„Don‘t get attached again!“

 “He will only betray you!“

 “Stab him!“

Bringing up my hand to my hair i pulled on it from the pain starting to flow through my brain. A ringing noise became louder making my me clench me teeth together. I was snapped out of my thoughts when i felt a hand on my shoulder making me jump. My head snapped around to look behind me but i relaxed when i saw a comforting smile on the older man‘s face.

„Here put these pillows under his legs so that more blood floods to his brain.“

Grabbing the pillows out of his hand i gently picker up the legs of the tall being and put the pillows under them laying his legs back down. A yawn left my mouth making me realise how tired i actually was.

„Don‘t worry Techno he‘s going to be fine. You can go to sleep I’ll stay with Ranboo and watch over him.“

„But are you sure i can-„

„I‘m sure Techno. Go rest you need it.“

A grumble of defeat left my mouth and i walked over to the ladder to go upstairs to my bed. Looking back one last time i saw Phil pulling the hybrid up to lay against him and putting his wings around the younger making a smile appear on my lips. Turning backs round i made my way up the ladder and slendered over to my bed. Too lazy to do anything else i took of my boots and laid down. Already half asleep i pulled the blanket over my body and fell into the land of dreams.

Masterlist

[snowboiwinwin]

NCT Dream (+ Shotaro and Sungchan) as types of Among Us players

this is all based on my friends and I whenever we play Among Us... it is a mess but absolutely hilarious! Hope you enjoy! :)

Mark: the yellow character, uses some type of nickname that no one actually calls him

Is never saying much, but is especially quiet when he is an impostor

Actually a really good impostor

Wins 8/10 times

Very risky killer thoguh, he has BALLS

Always has an alibi somehow

But don‘t sus him please - as soon as he opens his mouth and is put under pressure.... everyone knows its him

“Guuuuuys, I swear. It wasn‘t me! Oh come ooooon. I was in admin! Oh.... you were in admin too? Bro, I didn‘t see you though. Guys, I don‘t wanna sus anyone, but he might be it.... Guys, guys, listen! I was-, hey! Guys! OKAY! I AM THE IMPOSTOR, I ADMIT! JUST KILL ME ALREADY!“

Renjun: most probably the black character, uses a cute nickname and puts cute accessories on his character

yes, yellow (aka Mark) is a great impostor

BUT Renjun is THE best

his character looks so innocent with the cute lil name and the christmas lights

But don‘t let it fool you

ALWAYS has an alibi as well

And even when you sus him - he has the best arguments as to why you should believe he is actually innocent (he never is) and always manages to make someone else look sus, so he‘s off the hook (not that you sus him to begin with)

Usually is the impostor 5 times in a row

Wins 9/10 times

“Can I just say something? Chenle has been really weird this whole game. I think he even closed the doors on me when we were in electrical but he didn‘t dare kill me cause someone was in front of the door... why are you getting so defensive? I just said it was kinda sus, not that I actually think you’re the impostor... your behavior is very off man... bro, I was with Jeno this whole time! yeah, let‘s vote for Chenle, just to be save.“

Jeno: changes his character‘s color all the time but usually it‘s either dark or lime green, uses his last name and puts fancy suits on his character

Literally the best person to play Among Us with

He is so chill and laid back and let‘s you actually talk (some people just outscream each other and I find that annoying)

Also an amazing impostor

He is just so nice and kind, you would never sus him

“Don‘t worry Haechan, I can confirm that you are innocent! I saw him doing tasks, guys. It can‘t be him.“ (well yeah, cause it‘s you Mr. Lee)

Due to this, no one would ever sus him

Kills usually the same people at the same spot (apparently not even on purpose) and that‘s actually why the others sus him

Wins 9.5/10 times

“Okay, only us three left... we really have to think this through. Chenle, why are you trying to proof your innocence so hard when we haven‘t even said anything? Ugh, I don‘t even wanna vote anyone, I really don‘t know who it could be. To the impostor, you did a great job! I‘m honestly shocked by how well played this was. Oh? We voting Chenle? Okay!“

Haechan: the dark blue character, uses a „cool“ made up rap name and suits to look even cooler

He is LOUD

And he has literally no mercy

Do not sus him or else you will lose your hearing

He outscreams everyone

Kills infront of someone else and acts as if the other person (usually Jaemin) has killed Jisung

Literally self-reports but due to Jaemin not being able to get a word in, EVERYONE believes him

But although he is doing quite well most of the time, the others see the pattern in his impostor tactics and stop believing him at one point

Wins 5/10 times

“I SWEAR IT WASN‘T ME!!! IT WAS JAEMIN; I SAW IT WITH MY OWN TWO EYES!!! You know what guys, fuck you. You are unbelievebale, you are all gonna lose now! Thanks for nothing.“ *mutes his mic*

Jaemin: he chooses the colors pink or purple, goes by his actual name and uses either a cool cap or flowers for accessoires

He is alwas the one the others sus, just becasue

They don‘t even have reasons but apparently he is always acting hella sus

Which frustrates him, because they only sus him when he is a crewmate, never when he is the actual impostor (which is hilarious)

He is genuinely doing tasks and trying to defend people he deemed innocent but still, he is always the one getting accused of the killing

When he is impostor, he usually doesn’t even kill people cause he is so nervous and afraid hahaha

So the crewmates know, when there isn‘t a single kill after 5 minutes, it is probably Jaemin

But when he is on a killing spree, he is actually quite good - 100% better than Haechan

Wins 7/10 times

“Guys, why would it be me? I was just with Shotaro and Jeno the whole time! I didn‘t kill either of them!!! GUYS I AM NOT THE IMPOSTOR I SWEAR TO GOD!!!! If I would be the impostor you would know cause no one ever dies! Omg, are you for real??? Guys I AM INNOCENT!!! YOU ARE KILLING THE WRONG ONE!!“ *gets voted off while being an innocent crewmate*

Chenle: the white character, uses a weird name and also dresses up in cool suits

Boy is always sus

Probably because he constantly is the impostor

He also kills very fast

The game just started and there‘s already a reported body

So that‘s what makes him sus immediately - he kills 5 seconds into the game

But he is good at talking himself out of it - people still sus him though

He is making stupid mistakes though; “Jisung, let‘s stick together!“ and suddenly Jisung is dead

Usually plays 2-3 rounds as an impostor before people know for sure it‘s him

Wins 6.5/10 times

“Noooo? It isn‘t me wtf? Are you guys drunk? WELL I PERSONALLY THINK IT‘S SUNGCHAN! Every other opinion is INVALID!! I haven‘t seen him this WHOLE game! Shut up Sungchan, that‘s what an impostor would say as well. Yes guys! TRUST ME!!! Bye Sungchannie!“

Jisung: the red character, uses a weird name he came up with that has nothing to do with his actual name, also wears suits cause Chenle wants to match #chenji

He never is impostor

He wants nothing more than to be the impostor once

When he suddenly gets chosen to be the impostor - he gets voted off immediately

But not because he is bad - his impostor teammate is the reason

Imagine; lights go out, his impostor mate kills one person directly infront of the electrical, infront of jisung and runs away... suddenly lights turn on and jisung stands infront of the dead body

People immediately vote him off, no questions asked

Wins 3/10 times

“I know it looks so bad, but I swear it wasn‘t me! Renjun got killed infront of me, I didn‘t even have time to report him yet! Guys, seriously, it was NOT me!!!“ but due to Chenle (most probably the other impostor) throwing accusations at him, he doesn‘t even get to say much

Shotaro: the orange character, goes by a nickname and usually chooses the egg for accessories

Is not that experienced with the game

so let‘s say, he plays for the firs time with the boys

He is the impostor for the first 4 rounds - he is completely overwhelmed

Never gets suspected cause “he just started playing this game - no way he is impostor and gets away with it so easily“

Whenever people sus him he plays the “i don‘t know how this works“ card - and the others believe him

The boys are SHOOK when they see he was the actual impostor

Wins 11/10 times - his cuteness and innocence make him win every time

“I was in that one room, I don‘t know what it‘s called....“, “I have a question; why are these alarms going off? Huh? Impostors can sabotage? How is that possible??? Oh okay, wow. Good to know. I hope i can remember this when I am the impostor then!“

Sungchan: the brown character, shares the same braincell as Chenle and chooses a weird name haha, is the only one who has a pet

He is the only one that thinks logically

Doesn‘t sus people without having his reasons (even when he is impostor)

Plays very well, sticks with his partner most of the time - double kills occure often with him being impostor

Him and Jaemin are actually a very good team

Although they stick together a lot, they also try to get alibis from other players

Win 10.5/10 times (sometimes he does mess up)

“No guys, I can confirm that Jisung is not the impostor, let that guy live for once! Haechan on the other hand apparently finished the ‚Simon says‘ task in less than a minute, which i find very weird as it takes longer than that.“ *cue Haechan‘s screaming*

[jbbuckybarnes]

Cute

Pairing: Bucky x Reader (2,6k words) Description: Bucky has a crush on you that he can’t seem to ignore and Alpine is causing some trouble along the way. Prompt: "Wait, did you just call me cute?" (/w Bucky) For: @coffee-with-bucky​‘s challenge. Warnings: Nightmare, awkwardness, slight angst, fluff, not proofread

M A S T E R L I S T

A white furball was sitting on the coffee table in front of a big dark figure, early in the spring morning. „Meow!“ Alpine voiced her opinion. „What‘s wrong, baby girl?“ Came back from Bucky‘s voice. „Meow.“ Her left paw went forward and tried to touch him. „You want to be pet?“ „Meow.“ His hand came closer and she pressed her head against it. „Rrrmeow.“ His hands both reached to scratch behind her ears. „Yeah, you like that, needy furball.“ He chuckled. She advanced towards him, putting her paws on his chest and booping his nose with hers. „You‘re a sweet girl, aren‘t you?“ She licked the tip of his nose. His smile was so giant, it was almost scary if you‘ve never seen it before. „God, you actually look cute when your face shows emotions,“ you commented in the door frame. He chuckled and stopped shortly after, „Wait, did you just call me cute?“ „Yeah. Happens when you‘re not looking like the death himself.“ You grinned at him. His face was back at its usual asshole resting face. You sat down very close to him, seeing Alpine sit down on the other side of him. „You look good when you smile. I like that look on you.“ You smiled behind your mug. „Meow.“ „Look she agrees.“ You reached out to squish his cheeks together and make him chuckle, which you succeed in. „Stop.“ He grumbled and grabbed you. You, dodging it by throwing yourself against him. „Darling!“ he threw you a stern look and you giggled, coming back up right in front of his face, seeing a smile vanish to a slight blush on his face. „Sorry if I made you uncomfortable,“ you mumbled. „No, no. Not at all.“ He looked down at his hands. God, he had such a crush on you, but he couldn‘t and shouldn‘t. It wouldn‘t work, he couldn‘t even hold a conversation. He was glad you even felt comfortable around him. „Meow!“ Alpine pushed her head into his side very hard to make him move towards you. „Alpine, no.“ He mumbled and got a protesting meow back. She was determined. „What is she trying to tell you?“ You dipped your head to the side. „Uh, just, nothing.“ He was so weird all of a sudden. The furball licked her paw and then put it up in your direction before dipping her head to the side with a purr. „Did she just...alright, wow. Can you understand us?“ You got closer to the cat but got an almost arrogant stance back. „I ask her that all the time.“ He chuckled nervously. „Did she mean kissing?“ You were thoroughly confused by what she had just done. „Um.“ He looked away, blushing profusely. Your eyes got big, „She did.“ „I need to go.“ He mumbled, grabbed the protesting cat and booked it.

-

It was your free day, until it wasn‘t. The team that was out on a mission came back in a hurry. With a baby. „You two stay here, keep her safe. We need to find the organization trying to hurt her.“ „Where is her mom?“ „Gone. Just keep her safe. We need to go.“ And Steve and the others were already out of the compound again, leaving you with a baby in your arms. „Friday, put the security level up.“ „Will do.“ When you came back into the living room you saw Bucky watch his favorite show without even noticing you. Alpine made a leap off the couch to come towards you and loop through your legs. A coo made the giant man raise a brow and turn around. „What in the mother of-“ „They dropped her off and currently try to chase down the people wanting her for some reason.“ You shrugged and sat down next to him. „You‘re good with children, right? I didn‘t have much family and I honestly have no idea what to do other than holding her. Help.“ You looked into his eyes helplessly. „I haven‘t- Fine.“ He grabbed her out of your grasp. „Friday? Do we know her name?“ „Her name is Olive.“ „Hey, I‘ll call you Lilly. Alright?“ He cooed down at the little bundle and got a little coo back. The baby looked extra small in his grasp, but it also looked way more relaxed than with you. Her eyes got heavier and heavier the more he slightly moved her just right. „Yeah, you probably had an exhausting day, baby girl.“ He smiled down at her. That smile that was reserved for pets and children. That „I‘m not being judged“ smile. „I‘d never be that good with children.“ You mumbled and had him look up. „What? No, you‘re just not used to it. I think you‘d be great with children.“ „Really?“ „Yeah, you‘re good at taking care of people. Why not put that into a smaller version.“ He put down the little girl between the both of you on the couch and watched her sleep. „Do you want children?“ You asked a little shy. That was a personal question to ask such a traumatized person. „Yeah. One day.“ He smiled down at Olive and took her little hand. „I think you‘d be a great dad.“ You smiled and saw him look up and blush. „Um, thanks. Uh, do- Do you want children one day?“ He stammered. „Maybe. Only if I find the right person.“ You shrugged and looked away. „You will. I‘m sure of it,“ he answered as Olive already started to fuzz again. Watching him be so good at this kinda made you think twice if you really wanted this one day. You felt like anyone would be more qualified at it than you. „You got this, right? I- I think I need to just-“ You gestured towards the door before making your way out, leaving behind a confused Bucky looking at a baby in his arms and a cat that disapprovingly put her head back down.

-

He looked pretty beaten up after this particular intense mission. Two cuts in the face and a bullet wound in is side. You sat down on his bed in the med bay, „Hey.“ „Hey.“ You got a soft smile from him. „Do you need help with cleaning up those wounds?“ You asked reluctant. „I mean, they only did the bullet wound, so I‘d appreciate it.“ He chuckled a bit strained. You got everything you needed and sat down next to him again, moving his head how you needed it. He frowned for a second before his expression eased at...whatever it eased at. You didn‘t notice the stare at your lips that kept him thoroughly distracted. It would be so easy for him to just go for it right now, but he shouldn‘t. He knew he shouldn‘t. „Aaand you‘re all cleaned up again.“ You smiled at him and got a tiny „Thank you“ back. „Anything else?“ You dipped your head to the side. „What else would there be?“ He smiled. „I could get you clothes to change into, make your hair less messy, get you some food,“ you suggested. „Make my hair less messy. Please.“ He played the idiot in need, but he really just wanted to feel your hands in his hair. You sat down behind him, started detangling it and sending chills down his spine. Then you started braiding little braids into it and he was sure that this was his undoing. And as you saw his shoulders relax you gave him a little scalp massage, letting him lose all the tension he was holding. „God, I could kiss you right now. This is amazing.“ He grumbled relaxed. „Wouldn‘t hold it against you.“ You chuckled as you sat next to him again. „Is that so?“ He smirked. „Yeah, well, I‘m pretty good, aren‘t I?“ „Yeah.“ There was this softness, this fuzz in the air. 

-

Alpine came walking towards you in the very early morning as you wanted to get yourself some warm milk with honey to fall back asleep. Nothing she usually did. Normally she was always a step behind or ahead of Bucky. You frowned and crouched down. „Is there something wrong, sweetie?“ „Meow.“ „I take that as a yes.“ „Meow.“ You made your way to his quarters in the compound and knocked at his door. When there was no answer you pushed the slightly ajar door open. „Where is he, Alpine?“ You looked down and saw her rush towards the bathroom door. She scratched the surface lightly with soft meows. She was not a trained therapy cat but she sure as hell was one hell of a buddy. The bond they both had showed especially now. „Bucky?“ You asked soft but nervous. Nothing. „Alpine got me here. What is wrong? Please open the door.“ You explained and asked. „Meow.“ Harder Scratching, paws reaching under the door. „Friday? Can you please unlock this door?“ „Protocol: MHE. Door unlocked.“ You pushed down the handle slowly, letting Alpine rush in first before you could even see anything. You only heard her purring before you saw her forcefully cuddle into a hunched figure. „Bucky…“ You came towards him, sat down in front of him. Nothing. You reached out for his flesh arm to feel him. He was a little cold for his usual supersoldier warmth. „Wait, I‘ll get you a blanket,“ you mumbled, coming back with a giant black soft throw blanket. „Bucky, please talk to me.“ He didn‘t move the head leaning on top of one of his arms. Alpine in the small room between his thighs and his chest pushed against him. She was purring and making biscuits on him as best as she could. Truly a good girl. „James, at least pet Alpine. You don‘t have to talk to me, but she‘s doing a great job.“ A shaky breath left him before his free hand reached for Alpine and carefully went through her fur. „Meow.“ She looked up at him. You just knew. She was verbally mothering him, kicking his ass. „Thank you, Al.“ A deep, nasally and rough voice came from him before his face came up a bit so she could climb higher on his chest to be scratched. „What happened?“ You asked softly again. „Bad dream. Somehow you were a person brought in to make me comply and...you were killed by a drone strike somehow. God, I have a lot of gore in my mind, but that was horrible.“ You saw tears form in his eyes again and pulled him close. „I‘m here. See? I‘m hugging you and I‘m here. You won‘t let anything bad happen to me, ever. I know that.“ You tried to soothe him. He grabbed you, squeezed your arms, your waist, your hips, touched your hair. „It looked so fucking bad. It was awful. I can‘t get the picture out of my head.“ He dug his face into the crook of your neck. „Think about your favorite moment with me then. Or that mission where I accidentally shot Steve in his arm. Or when Alpine tried to tell you to kiss me.“ You chuckled. His hands wandered up and down your body, relaxing both of you. „You know, I really kinda want it. To kiss you, I mean.“ He stumbled over his words. „What‘s holding you back?“ You whispered. „My brain.“ His head came up and looked at you. You could see the troubled mind in his eyes. „Then what‘s your heart saying?“ You asked pointing at it. His face turned soft, „That you‘re cute.“

You went through his hair carefully, still a little concerned about him. „I know, I should cut it off,“ he mumbled. „Huh? No, you don‘t need to. I like you with any type of hairstyle.“ You offered him a soft smile. „I want it short again. I don‘t wanna look like him anymore. Not after that dream.“ He shuddered at the mention. „Now?“ You asked still going through it and saw him nod. „Do you trust me?“ „I do.“ You got up, grabbed scissors and an electric razor from all over his bathroom, before taking his blanket away from him under protest of both him and his cat. The cat proceeded to lay down in the warm blanket pile shortly after. You put his hair in three tails, cut them off while being watched carefully. His shoulders relaxed when that step was finished. You proceeded to get all of his top hair up into a tail, helping with various products in spray bottles, cause you were definitely not used to doing this anymore. Alpine jumped a little when the razor turned on, but when she saw Bucky visibly relax even more she rolled back into a furball on the blanket pile. You shaved down his sides and back a decent amount. Not too much. You didn‘t want to make this look military style. Then you continued with the top of his head. You didn‘t know which length would be ideal. Maybe not too short, but too long also looked off with his fluffy hair. You still wanted to indulge in playing with it though. Maybe about 3-4 cm / 1-2 inches long. It took a while for you to figure out the way you needed to go about cutting it but you were finished with it in no time. With soft brushes over his hair you got rid of any hair that didn‘t belong there anymore before making him stand up. „WOAH.“ His eyes got wide as he went through his hair, looking at your quality work. „You like it?“ „I love it.“ He looked at you in the mirror, seeing a loving shimmer in your eyes. Maybe he DID deserve you. „We should go to bed. I only slept like 3 hours because of that,“ he mumbled and you nodded as you put out the bathroom light and closed the door behind Alpine. You padded after him, making him do a full stop and turn around a little confused. „What?“ You asked rubbing your eyes and he really couldn‘t say no. So he did the next best thing coming to his mind, grabbed around your waist and let himself fall into his bed. „Idiot.“ You giggled into his chest and climbed up a bit a few seconds later. „Hey.“ He smiled up at you as you grabbed into his hair. „Hey handsome.“ You smirked all tired before cuddling yourself against him and planting your face in his neckline. Yeah, maybe he did deserve you.

-

In your routine of being half awake and grumpy you turned around to hit something unusual with your arm. „Ouch.“ You heard next to you pretty monotone, then holding back laughter. „Sorry, B.“ You pushed yourself into his grasp to fall back asleep. „Darling, it‘s noon.“ You pried one of your eyes open to look at him judgingly. „C‘mere,“ he cooed as he pulled you extra close. „Didn‘t know you could show that emotion.“ You giggled as you gave him a little kiss on his cheek. „Oh, believe me. There are a lot of emotions that are a you-only thing.“ He grinned at you and felt your hand pat up the side of his face to find the proper position. „Show me another.“ You smiled up at him all sleepy. This was a now or in three uncomfortable weeks kinda situation. You were just enough in sleep mode for him to feel less awkward about making a move on you. So he reached for your face and finally went for that damn kiss that‘s been the topic of his life for weeks. Your hand went through his new short hair with a hum, pushing him down for more. Yes, definitely the right decision.

[slashnatic]

NSFW ALPHABET [Vincent Sinclair]

a/n: soo...this is the first time i actually post what i wrote + english isn't my first language (and i feel like there’s still 1000 mistakes in this although i proof-read it like 10 times) so please don't be too hard on me, but feel free to give me constructive criticism :)

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He definitely takes care of you after. He’ll clean you up, gets you a drink if you want...really anything. You need to go to the bathroom? Sure, he can carry you. You’d rather walk yourself? Well, you’re only allowed to go after he’s given you your goodbye-kiss-on-the-forehead. And no, this is not unnecessary because you'll be back in a few minutes, it’s a must.

Once all of that is done he likes it when you lay your head down on his chest or the other way around and you just cuddle and enjoy each other’s company in a comfortable silence.

B = Body Part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Vincent has a very prominent v-line. He never paid attention to it until he realized how much you like it and with that it became also his favorite body part of himself.

He loves the curve of your hips and waist. (Whether you are slim or curvy, he absolutely loves it either way!) His favourite thing is when you’re lying naked on top of him, your head on his chest and one leg laying on top of his in an angled position. He won't stop caressing and squeezing your hips.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum basically)

He both loves and hates cuming inside of you. He loves the intimacy of it, the vulnerability you show each other, but he is also scared of the possible consequences, at least at the beginning of your relationship.

He also likes to cum on your chest and belly.

D = Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs)

Vincent has watched you a lot. At first it was innocent glances he stole, later he would make time to watch you from afar going after your daily tasks and the more he started to obsess over you the less he cared about how wrong it was to basically stalk you. It went so far that he once stood before an barely-open door, watching your every move through the small gap while you showered.

It doesn‘t really matter how long you are together, he still does it sometimes. You’ve grown used to it and now even put on a show for him sometimes, pretending you don‘t know he’s right there.

Another secret of his is that he sculpted your orgasm-face. It‘s weird and creepy, but he doesn’t really care. (I’m referring to the faces he sculpted in the walls on the way down to the basement. You’ll find your face there too, just a bit a part from the others.)

E = Experience (how experienced they are)

Not at all. Vincent has been wearing his mask since he can remember. He didn't even consider pressing his wax mask in some girl’s face. Needless to say pressing your lips on wax isn’t really romantic and with that no teenage girl‘s dream. Aside from that he barely left the house. When he was older he had gotten too used to it. In conclusion: He never even kissed a woman and he didn't have sex either.

F = Favourite Position (their favourite position, could possibly include a visual)

I believe it is called the Sphinx Position.

https://littlepennyberry-files-wordpress-com.cdn.ampproject.org/i/s/littlepennyberry.files.wordpress.com/2018/12/IMG_3071.png?w=768&h=433

He likes how he towers over you. Not even in a dominant way, but more that his frame completely covers yours. Your body is practically buried by his, but in a good kind of way? It’s just whatever ground you‘re having sex on underneath you and him on top of you; you’re trapped in between, there‘s only him and it gives him a feeling of pride. He also loves kissing and softly biting your neck in that position.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He is quite serious, probably even stiff the first few times you’re having sex. He will get comfortable though and then he‘s a total romantic.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Vincent is almost never completely shaved. He doesn’t have the time for it and even if he did he doesn't think of it as necessary. Nevertheless he’s still always clean down there, just a bit sweaty sometimes from the heat of the fire in the basement.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? romantic aspect, etc.)

Uh, yes? Just yes. Yes, sex is an intimate thing to him. Yes, he is a romantic.

While he overall views sex as something very intimate, his mask also plays a big role. He’s scared shitless of taking the mask off, but he also doesn’t want to wear it while you‘re making love. Besides the fact that it‘s quite impractical, it also makes him feel worthless. He’ll overthink and then believes you’re only having sex with him and want to be close to him or even want him at all when you don‘t have to put up with his face, that you don’t actually care for him and that he isn't good enough. He knows himself well enough though, so he takes it off before he can lose himself in those thoughts (this doesn’t make taking the mask off easier though). In conclusion he rather has sex with you when he is (as a side affect, but that doesn’t really make a difference) vulnerable and therefore sex really is something intimate to him.

J = Jack Off (masturbation headcanon)

Well, first of all...he thinks about sex fairly often. There are also quite a few pieces of his art that have a sexual touch. (Have you seen the couple on the couch in the wax house? They’re going at it!)

He doesn‘t jerk off whenever he thinks about something sexual, but he does jerk off quite often. When he does it he‘s downright filthy. Lies in his bed or preferably sits at his work bench stroking his member at first slow and then faster and faster, throwing his head back, groaning and hissing and then finishing all over his work bench with his eyes closed, imagining it was your body.

He might as well has a few photos and videos of you. Wether he took them with or without your permission is up to your imagination.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Voyeurism. While he does enjoy watching you pleasure yourself, he prefers watching or rather observing you while he fingers you. He’ll spread your legs and position himself between them so that he lies on his elbows, fingering you with one hand and holding you in place (as much as possible from that angle) with the other, his face right in front of your heat. This also gives him the perfect opportunity to have a taste too.

He also has a praise kink. Telling him not to stop? Oof. Telling him how good he makes you feel? Bigger oof. Telling him how pretty he looks? Biggest oof.

L = Location (favourite places to have sex)

He preferably has sex in the basement with you. On his work bench or really wherever, just not directly where he works. You can be as loud as you want, there is a lot of space and lots of opportunities for whatever-you-wanna-try. Plus the house is quite dirty and so is his bedroom and he doesn't want to be that kind of filthy.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Anything can be sexy to Vincent, it really just depends on his mood.

It might be simple, but seeing you naked is his biggest turn-on. I‘m talking completely bare and vulnerable. No towel because you just came out of the shower. No blanket because you’re in bed. No make-up. Nothing. Just you, you’re body being illuminated by the warm light of the candles in the basement. And don’t talk. For some reason it is incredibly sexy to him just taking you in, so pure and perfect. When he sees you like this he doesn't get horny, he just:

N = NO (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything verbal which is respectless and degrading. If you’re into humiliation, that‘s cool. He can spank you, whip you, do whatever you want, but he won’t call you names. Ever. If you call him names he’ll also probably cry.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Vincent loves eating you out. Your taste, your soft moans, you telling him how good it feels... It makes him proud and when he hears those sweet sounds leaving your mouth he forgets all his insecurities for the moment.

It took him a while to discover this though, since he is so insecure. (‘You seriously want that face between your legs?’)

He hasn’t had any experience, but that doesn’t mean that he’s doing a bad job! He knows your body (or the human body in general) well enough to know what will make you feel good. On top of that he’s a quick learner. For everything else he makes up with his enthusiasm.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He’s rather slow, but still quite rough. He’s a big, strong guy after all.

Also: When it comes to who’s more dominant it really changes with his mood and the atmosphere. He likes hovering over you and trapping you underneath him, fucking you hard but teasingly slow. He likes to hear you whining, whimpering and telling him how good he feels inside of you. You look so beautiful when you stare up at him with big glassy eyes and rosy cheeks. Nevertheless he likes being submissive too, you straddling him, pinning his arms down and telling him what to do and what not to do. He likes being soft to you and he likes being rough to you. He likes you being soft to him and he likes you being rough to him too. He really doesn‘t have a preference.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Vincent doesn’t like quickies, they are almost a no-go. He likes to take his time, since it's something where he feels very vulnerable. Rushing through it isn’t satisfying for either of you in his opinion. He also feels like quickies lack passion and isn’t that what sex is all about?

Foreplay is also important to him. You start kissing him? He will get lost and he won't let you go. Not even for sex. Your having your romantic kiss now and you will have it a while longer. It doesn't matter how horny you are, you’ll have to be patient.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Absolutely! There’s basically nothing he wouldn't try, he just needs a bit of time “exploring“ whatever is new.

He also isn‘t actually disgusted by anything, whatever tools, body fluids or other things are involved. He might be a bit confused about some things you want to try out and isn't naturally turned on by it, but you can probably change his mind.

S = Stamina (how many rounds they can go for, how long they last…)

This totally depends on his mood, but even if it’s one round and no more he‘ll want to make sure you are satisfied. If you go for one round it‘s basically a lot of very intense foreplay, petting and all that, but less of penetration. More rounds means more penetrating sex, but will probably include some longer breaks in between.

T = Toy (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Nope. He knows they exist, but doesn’t bother to get to know more about it. He has two perfectly fine hands and now you, he‘s good.

If you want to introduce some toys to him though he’ll be interested and willing to try it out.

For some reason he really likes buttplugs, no matter if you use them or if he does.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He doesn’t tease you, at least not intentionally. When he feels like it, he touches, strokes and gropes you, but never because he wants to tease you. It often has the same effect as if he did though.

If you tease him...oh boy. If he doesn’t realize right away that you‘re doing it intentionally he’ll probably react super affectionate, in the sweetest way possible. Once he does realize it he’s confused as to how he should react and he is?? sad?? Like...why are you messing with his emotions like that? You can explain it to him, but he’ll probably never hop on the train and tease back or whatever.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)

Isn‘t much of a talker during sex, but he does make some noise. He grunts and groans a lot. Whatever you do you’ll probably get a verbal reaction out of him. He surprisingly isn’t even trying to be quiet and isn’t ashamed of it either. He usually doesn’t talk and it’s as if he‘s letting it all out (Charlie Hoyt voice) f o r b a l a n c e.

W = Wild Card (a random headcanon/imagine for the character of your choice)

He loved your taste on his lips, the sound of your soft moans and needy whimpers in his ears, the feeling of your soft skins underneath his fingertips, even your smell. Yes, he loved your smell. The smell of your hair, the particular smell of your body, oh and he loved how you smelled there. He often wondered if this, the way he felt about you, was love or obsession. Probably both, but he didn’t mind. He didn’t mind because he knew you loved him too. And in your own way you were obsessed with him too. Ever since he‘d let you in, you had given your all to show him. And it had only made the feelings stronger, for the both of you. He placed a last light kiss to your heat before hovering over you again to feel your lips on his. The kiss was lazy, almost innocent and to him it felt like he was drowning in euphoria. With your eyelids only half open and a tired, loving smile on your lips you pulled him down to you. And there you two laid, lovers worn out with no energy left from hour-long love making, you comfortable on your back and he on top of you, with his face buried in the crook of your neck, your hand on the back of his head, you placed a kiss to his forehead. It was the last thing he felt before he fell asleep, just this once the first of you two.

X = X-Ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Let’s put it this way: It makes up for what god took away from him.

He’s above average length and very thick. Not big enough for an unrealistic way-over-the-top porno, but big enough to write a letter about it to your best friend if you know what I mean.

Y = Yearning (how high their sex drive is)

As mentioned earlier he thinks about sex a lot, so he’d always be down for it, but it isn’t a necessity. He’s horny quite often, but that doesn’t mean he needs to get off whenever he’s horny. He can ignore it or take care of it himself, no stress. Unless you want to have sex whenever he’s horny of course, then he‘d also be more than happy.

Z = ZZZ (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He‘s relaxed but won’t fall asleep for a while, so if you do he probably just stares at you and admires you (he even draws you sometimes, but only if it doesn’t ruin the moment).

[jmeddows2]

Purple Thunder finale (Roger Taylor Series)

(present/old) Roger Taylor series

Notes: ATTENTION: it is here! after almost half a year, the finale of purple thunder is here! If you’re still sticking around, thank you, I love you! I hope this one isn’t too cringey for you all, it sure as hell is for me! I hope it lives up to your expectations (at least a little). As always let me know how you like it, shoot me a dm, ask, anything. I love hearing from you. 

PS. this contains song lyircs of: The Pretty Reckless - Kill me;  Greta van Fleet - Safari Song & Taylor Swift - Call it what you want to. 

english is not my first language, sorry for mistakes. Also, I didn’t proof read much - bare with me please. 

Words: 4,3+k

Warnings: cursing? none else, it’s fluffy and cringey, whatever ;’)

*flashback to two years ago*

"Not very subtle is it?“

"What are you saying?“ you looked up to see Rufus looking over shoulder to read along the scribbled lines written on your notepad.

"drugs, bars, backseats of cars, blowing boys?“ he read chuckling his way to take a seat on the couch beside you.

"It‘s Rock 'N Roll what do you expect“ you laughed pulling your feet up to rest them on his thighs.

"Now who‘s the child of a fucking rock legend out of the two of us?“

"You know, if I didn‘t know any better, I‘d say it was you“ Rufus pinched your leg before bringing them to the ground. "Enough talking let‘s get mortal or I‘m going to die“ you jumped up and it wasn‘t two hours later that you were in the bathroom of a club fooling around with a random dude. Living the life of a rockstar to its fullest potential, for once not thinking about what the media would have to say the next morning. You didn‘t give a fuck. With one swift motion you pulled out a little plastic bag of coke and sloppily made a line along the countertop. Hands trembling in anticipation and the guys lips were nibbling on your neck.

"You got any money on you?” he brought his hot wet lips from your neck and handed you a crumbled up 5 pound note that he kept in the front pocket of his jeans. You used the money to press one nostril down and snorted hard.

"Fuck you‘re so hot“ the guy said while having his eyes on you by looking in the mirror.

"want some?“ you offered, but he declined. Another sloppy line and a make out session later, you stumbled out. It was a hard life. It sucked. But you would never let anyone know. Chasing a high but falling down even lower and hitting the ground. City. Concert. Drinks. Drugs. Sex. Meltdown. Repeat. 

The rare nights you spent alone in your hotel room were the worst. You felt small, like you didn‘t belong, being not able to tell fantasy from reality, seeing how far you could go. Zoning out, even if it was just for half an hour was a relief, not being yourself. Not having to be yourself. You stomped back into the room. Your drummer, Sid to your left having some blonde chick pressed up to a wall and he fist bumped you. A sort of "congratulating“ each other on the many times you both got lucky. Hot bodies all over the place and it felt like if one more person entered the club, it would have exploded. You felt your high slowly fade, trying to match names to the people you encountered all while searching for someone you personally knew. Long blond hair at the bar. Rufus. "Heyyy“ you slurred at him as he turned around. A pint of beer in his hand.

"Y/N! You don‘t look too good honey“

"What a gentleman you are“ your eyes were still blown and glassy. He looked quite concerned.

"I‘ll take you to the hotel love“ he touched your arm in a caring gesture.

"Don‘t take it the wrong way Ruf, like no offence, but I don‘t want to have sex with you“

"Not like that“ he laughed. "You look like you‘ve had enough for tonight. You‘ll thank me tomorrow.“ You felt stupid. Embarrassed. Being escorted out of the place like a child being dragged out of the candy store. Rufus put his arm around you to stabilize you, walking back to the hotel. As you began to sober more up, the embarrassment reached such height that you felt like dying right then and there. No one was supposed to see you like this. See you break, but the steps in the bright lobby of the hotel were the hardest. You could feel the walls you built up around you slowly but surely break. And once those walls are torn down. It‘s all over. "In you go lovely“ Rufus held the blanket up for you to slide in. "Thank you.“ "You‘re very welcome Ms. L/N“ he smiled. Rufus walked over to the little fridge to get a bottle of water. "Here you‘ll thank me tomorrow“ he handed it over to you. "Need anything else?“ he asked while tying his hair up. "I‘m good, I think“ you weakly smiled. Rufus startled you by jumping into the bed next to you. "You‘re not alright and being the good friend I am, I‘m here to listen and help.“ Silence followed and it felt like eternity. "I‘m fucked up“ your small voice filled the room. "You‘re just enjoying yourself“ he assured you. "Am I really? Who am I kidding? I made a complete fool out of myself once again." he could sense that he assumed wrong in the tone of your voice. "How do you mean?" he asked getting under the sheets. "It‘s all fun and games. Then I‘m alone again and everything gets worse.“ "And you feel guilty because you‘re cheating on Josh.?“ "I‘m the worst person, but no. Not entirely.“ Rufus reached out his hand to brush your hair back a bit, signaling that he was listening. "It‘s better now that you‘re here, because if you weren‘t, I would not know what to do with myself. Sometimes I can‘t stand myself. Most times, to be precise. I feel like a wreck. And I keep telling myself to not go back into these dark places. But still I keep going back.“ A silent tear made it‘s way down your cheek. "From now on and always. No matter when you need me, call me, facetime me, no matter the time. I know better said than done, but you‘re my friend. And friends don‘t give up on each other like that. You don‘t ever have to feel like you‘re alone in this. We‘re family.“ he pulled you closer to him, your head almost resting on his chest. With a steady breathing you slowly drifted off to sleep. *end of throwback*

Much time had passed. Time in which you felt the way you typically felt. Alone. Having broken up with Josh quite some time ago. Josh immortalizing you in one of his songs, describing how you left him, when he proposed: " Do you remember what I said, When I got down on my knees, Gotta get your lovin' baby, Lovin's all I need, Don't make me beg now baby, Don't make me bleed, I gave you all a man could give, And you still walked out on me" Roger has gone on tour. His wife in tow to your surprise. Every picture posted of them together made you feel smaller, the way he had his arm around her, made you doubt your situation around him. Tired of picking up a fight, sometimes ignoring his secret calls, you isolated yourself. The album, a declaration of love, that was supposed to be released soon, was now on the verge of being filled with songs that would make you feel the hurt and pain as a listener. It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining and Roger was coming home. The situation was uncertain. How would you deal with it? Did his flame of undying love find its way to burn with even more passion for his wife again? And what light did he see you in now? The 20-year-old something that’s been destroying his happy 10 years of marriage? Deep inside you hoped he wouldn’t, but to be honest, you wouldn’t have been surprised if he stayed with her. Maybe it was all just a rebellious phase. Trying to feel young again. Getting revenge on something stupid SHE did. The doorbell rang. It could be anyone, you thought to yourself. As you opened, a sheer wave of bliss washed over. His blue eyes shone like never before, you swore you saw stars in them. His hair was ruffled, well who’s wouldn’t be after a 20-hour flight. No exchange of words, just shoulders crushing into one another, fulfilling the tightest hug you’d ever felt. Once again, this is what home felt like and it’s been so long that all the doubts you had about him were crushed in a millisecond. "I missed you so much” Roger breathed into your neck. "I missed you more” you cried, your hand on the back of his head, fumbling with his white locks. “I don’t think that’s possible, my love.” he rasped. God you missed hearing the roughness of his voice, all close up and personal. When he pulled back, his nose gently brushed yours and he kissed you tenderly. "How are you feeling” you asked, helping him get his bags in, the majority of them already being shipped to Cornwall, to a house of his you haven’t got to see yet. "I’m toast” he huffed, letting himself fall into the comfy black sofa in the living room. “Is there maybe something I can help you with? A massage? Something else?” you tried to sound as seductive, slowly but surely getting settled on his lap. If he really didn’t get with his wife on tour he must be exploding by now, set aside all the secret wank sessions. As you grinded down on him, there was nothing. No reaction whatsoever. You tried some more until Roger stopped you.

"Sorry love, so sorry.” his fingers glided gently up and down your arm. "Has something happened? Have you changed your mind about us?” “No no, I’m just really exhausted I can’t quite ....you know.. get it up. I’m sorry, it’s embarrassing” "No Rog it’s not, don’t be sorry.” You assured him by kissing both of his cheeks one after the other, making him smile. "Anything else I can do for you instead?” you asked, ready to fulfill all his wishes. "I just want to be as close to as possible” He wanted affection, affection he had to go without for several months, except for the occasional social media schmoozing with his wife. Still sat in his lap, you cuddled tighter into him, cheek on cheek. His breathing was now more steady and peaceful, you could feel him relaxing, his tense muscles from drumming suddenly didn’t feel as tense any more. You two stayed like that for half an eternity, well a decent amount of hours, but it felt like minutes and before you knew it, the sun was setting. "Why don’t you move in with me?” Roger asked out of the blue, with you still on top of him. You looked into his eyes, questioning if it was a good idea. "Don’t worry, I already filed for divorce. The paperwork should be through pretty soon.” he assured you. God. That was it, now you knew he was for real. And hell would break loose if the media found out. For the media it already was bad that another woman was the reason for Roger Taylor’s divorce. But an age difference of 49 years would be the last straw - a real scandal. "I don’t know Rog. I don’t want to give up this place.” your apartment has been your rock over the years, you inspirational little cave with the perfect view.  "You don’t have to give this up.” He brought his hand up to your cheek, lifting your head so you were looking into his eyes once more. "I just want you with me all the time. I don’t want to go a day without you anymore” You melted into his touch. Every move he made, every word he said, every look he gave you, made your heart flutter. You’ve never felt this deep for anyone else before. So you nodded. "Is that a yes?” he asked with a dumb smile on his face. "Yes” His lips were on yours again. They felt like the inside of a rose, passionate, soft, and and a high of pure happiness rushed through both of you As the night grew cold, the two of you got comfy and especially cuddly. Finally together again. Roger cuddled into your chest. He needed this after months and months of going without it. It was only a matter of minutes, mixed with playing with strands of his hair and kisses to his forehead, that he fell asleep. His soft snoring let you know that he was very well enjoying every little thing. "The man who used to move under meat?“ you gave Roger a funny look. "Don‘t look at me like that“ Roger laughed having put on his stupid "joke face” but you loved it. He brushed a strand of your hair behind your ear. "t’was a guy at our parties, he would just lay on tables, being naked and covered in food that he was basically invisible. Once someone tried to grab something he wiggled, and they were startled. It was so fun watching“ you laughed at his story and cuddled closer to him. Roger’s Queen partying stories were the best, but thinking of all the girls he must have been with made you feel jealous and for some reason insecur as well.  "I can imagine. How many girls have you really been with?“ curiosity took over you. "Not as many as I‘d would let everyone know“ he chuckled. "Yeah yeah... bet it must be thousands“ you tried to sound as nonchalant as possible. "Well, then I have to disappoint you, my love“ you felt his hot breath on your cheek before he pressed a soft kiss to it. "And it certainly also wouldn’t have nearly been as many if you were there.“ "Roger we both know that‘s not true.“ "See, that‘s a lie“ he dipped down to kiss your lips. "Once we get to Cornwall I have something special to give you“ "What is it Rog?“ you whined still curled up in the warm bed drinking in the warmth that Roger left behind. "You first better get your beautiful bottom out of bed“ he called from the bathroom. "My bottom is here and ready start the day“ Roger finished shagging his hair out to style the way you liked it the most. Messy. He turned around and grabbed your face gently and closed the space between the two of you. "Morning breath“ you mumbled against his lips. "I‘ve had worse“ he mumbled back, a hint of mint made itself into your mouth. "Why do I believe you?“ you laughed, pulling away and letting your hand glide through his hair. "You look so good“ you looked at him in awe. "You know just how to flatter an old man“ "Don‘t. Say. That. Mr.. Taylor.“ you said in between placing kisses all over his face. His eyelashes fluttered while laughing. He was a sight to see. "You seriously better get ready now“ he gently slapped your bum and left you to yourself to take a shower. You put on some light makeup, comfy clothes and you both were off for a 5 1/2 hour drive in Roger’s black Range Rover. Thank god for Bluetooth speakers, much to Roger’s annoyance you blasted the Hot Space album, as well as any other Queen song he hated. "How do you even know these songs? You know every single word, might have to question your taste in music” Roger laughed. When he finally gave up, he joined you in singing along, harmonizing and trying to hit all the high notes just likehe did 40 years ago. To your surprise he still managed most of them. His hand almost never left your thigh, except for when it was time to shift gears. Yours usually rested on top of his. Nothing could ever compare to this.  When you arrived at his enormous mansion you were once again speechless. He showed you around to get settled once again and it made your mouth run dry, especially seeing all the golden discs and awards he stored all around the house and on the walls. Most of them were settled in the living room. "Can’t wait for you to contribute to the collection” Roger hugged you from behind while you admired them all. "Me?” You laughed. "Yeah of course you. I’ve never won a Grammy in my golden years. Only the honorable one 100 years later” his laugh vibrates on your neck. "Here” he handed you a black box. “Told you I’ve got something for you, something really special” You opened the box and it was one of the cymbal necklaces he was recently selling. Filled with joy, you jumped up on him and he gladly caught you in his arms, giving him a long kiss.  "Thank you, thank you so much!! I love it Roger” "But wait wait, my love” Roger put you down again. "This one was made out of the first cymbals I ever played with. And I wanted you to have it and kind of be a part of it,have a part of it, if that makes sense?” You had tears in your eyes, knowing that this part of his drums made such an impact on his life and him now giving it to you, even if was small, owning a piece of his early days. It made you feel special.. On the back, the words "right till the end, Love, Roger” were engraved. It was the best present ever, besides of course, having the love of your life all to yourself. "I also have something for you” you said, not having this situation exactly planned through, because of your anxiety he wouldn’t like it. "I had a lot of time to spend while you were gone“ "Doing only good stuff I hope“ he chuckled looking at you, his eyes shining from under his long lashes. "Come with me“ you took his hand into yours and guided him to the crackling fireplace. Roger sat down in his red leather chair, one that never left its place since moving in in the late 70s. You sat opposite him on the red, equally old fashioned carpet in front of the fire place, clutching your pitch black guitar tightly. "It’s not as awesome as your present, but here we go” A nervous feeling rushed through your body. Your slightly trembling fingers started picking the first chords. Seeing the way his eyes blinked at you, you knew he was listening closely. The song was called 'Call it what you want to’ and every single word was true. Nobody has heard from you for months, nor your fans, nor the media, at least  not since the Grammys. And Roger on the other hand, he loved you like you were brand new. He knew about your rocky, hard, and scandalous past, your battles with all things that are toxic and your battles with yourself. Still, he didn’t back down, he stayed by your side, no matter what. He built a fire just to keep you warm while everyone outside was throwing ice at you, trying to get to you. He could be trusted, a feeling not only his embrace let you know, but the way he treated you. His bad jokes always made you laugh, in fact the worse they were, the more you loved him. The “joke face” he gave you, when he expected you to laugh was just adorable and made you fall in love all over again.  When the song was finished, Roger had tears in his eyes. “Wow” he breathed. "I don’t think.. I don’t think anyone’s ever written a song about me, at least not one like this. It’s so beautiful. I couldn’t ask for a better present from the most beautiful girl in the world” your guitar was quickly on its stand again and you in Roger’s lap. "Thank you thank you thank you” he breathed kissing you all over. "It was a pleasure Mr. Taylor” you smiled. The hardest part was get to come. Releasing the songs which all evolved around yours and Roger’s relationship. Clearing all the rumors. Revealing your relationship. Meeting his children. But it all would come with time and didn’t matter at the moment.

 What he wanted though, was you meeting his children, as fast as possible. He was not one to keep something so special hidden from them, for as he long as he already did. So, one beautiful Saturday evening they all came to visit, you had even cooked a treat they all loved, but it was just how you expected it to be, at least part of it. Rufus came first, in tow with him Tigerlily and Lola. Roger and you were standing at the door, ready to greet them, but it seemed as if Lola still didn’t warm up to the idea of her dad dating someone so much younger, almost her age. Tigerlily hugged you right away, she was probably the most open minded one of them all. “It’s so good to finally meet you, I’m a big fan of yours!” Tigerlily giggled, handing over some wine and flowers as presents. “We’re going to kill this one later” she winked, holding up the bottle. “For sure” you smiled at her. Felix and Rory joined the party a bit later. It was kind of weird that they were a bit older, but you managed and as it seemed as if they didn’t have any problem with it either.

Tigerlily and you kept quoting vines and laughing at memes after dinner, to which Roger only shook his head, all while laughing about how good you were getting along. Your hand was casualy on the table when Roger cupped it with his, finally intertwining your fingers.  “Really?” Lola said out of nowhere, looking down at your joined hands. She got up and walked out of the room. “Lola” Roger called after her. Him, Felix, and Rory went after her. Your worst fear became reality. They didn’t accept you. You couldn’t blame her though, thinking you would react the same way if your dad showed up with someone much younger. 

“Don’t worry” Tigerlily assured you. “It’s just a lot for her to handle right now.” She hugged you tightly, rubbing your back. “Yeah , she needs time to warm up. Hasn’t even warmed up to Sarina entirely, it’s going to be alright.” Rufus said, taking a sip from his beer. He was right and you would be willing to give her as much time as she needed.

Nearly half an hour passed when they all came back into the dining room. “Y/N?” Lola stood in the door. “Can we talk?” she pointed towards the other room. You followed her. “Look, I’m sorry, that this is might be weird for you. I totally understand, but I really love your dad I-“ “I know” she interrupted. “And he really loves you. It just.. it just freaks me out a bit. And knowing my dad I know no one will ever be good enough for him, he’s the best dad ever” she explained. “ I believe you, he speaks highly of you all the time” “Well, he also does speak highly of you all the time, maybe I’m just a bit jealous that he won’t spend as much time with us anymore as he’s got you now.” Lola sounded sad and a bit disappointed. “ I won’t allow that” you assured her. “You know... I’d never keep him from seeing you all. As much as I love him, I want him to be happy and seeing as today went, it was pretty fun and a joy having you all around. Talking, eating, drinking.” “You’re right” Lola said. 

“I’m so sorry for making a scene.” “Don’t be sorry, it’s alright! But next time something bothers you, let’s just talk it out! I’ll always have an open ear for you!” “Awwe lovie, thank you. You know, you’re pretty cool actually. Having a female rockstar in the family makes for a great change” She admitted. “ You’re pretty awesome too! Love your photography” you smiled at her. “May I give you a hug?” Lola asked you to which you nodded. Right in this moment Roger went to look after the two of you and when he saw you hugging your problems out, his heart swell. He backed away quickly though, just fast enough for none of you to notice he was there.  “Let’s get back to the others now, or they’ll think we killed each other” you joked and you both went back to join the rest, to enjoy some desert. It was 2 am when Roger’s children left after everyone helped cleaning up. They really were all about teamwork and you adored them. 

“I had a great evening” you said to Roger while changing into something more comfortable. “I’m glad you had a good time, because I was really enjoying myself.. Except for the little.. Lola thing” he said, giving your shoulder a kiss. “oh, that’s alright, we get along now. What did you say to her anyway, when you went after her?” You asked him. “Oh just that you really put much work into this get together, you know.. with the cooking and all. And that I love you and you’re very important to me and that this is just how the future is going to be.” his reasonings were making you smile. “Your kids are awesome. You did a great job raising them.” “I know I did” he chuckled. “Can’t wait to meet them again” you said more quietly, brushing your thumb along his cheek. “Hold your horses little lady, you’ll see them soon enough. I love having them around y’know? We usually have a family meeting once a week, talking about what everyone is up to” “Sounds awesome” you loved the idea of them spending more time with the two of you, dining, drinking, having a laugh, going on family vacations. Family. The moment Roger saw you interact with his kids, having inside jokes with them, you and Tigerlily even arranging a date to go out shopping, he knew he made the right decision. Giving his whole heart to you and you loving him right back. He knew it already, someday, when the time was right, when the media would quiet down a little more, he’d make you “officially” part of his family. And when that time came, you knew what your answer to his question would be. YES. 

taglist: @goodoldfashionedlovergirlsblog @nicola2388 @bohemiansweede @namelesslosers @rogahqueen @jennyggggrrr @queenlover05​

[percilout]

Why I think Jaskier is queer-coded and also bi/pan: An Essay

Earlier today I made a post [x] asking for opinions on Jaskier being queer-coded and now I’m presenting you my 1.5k word long essay on why I think that’s the case and why I also think that Jaskier is bi/pan (even though the character most definitely wasn’t planned that way).

I used lots of gifsets and Tumblr posts as inspiration and sources and humbly thank everyone who has made my life much easier with those.

Okay, so, let me start this off by saying that the showrunners don‘t and most probably won‘t want to make Jaskier queer in any way. But there‘s a bit of a problem there because there‘s a good chance that the actor (Joey Batey) is going to go against that with his personal choices in acting the character out.

It doesn‘t help that there‘s an interview in which he actively goes against calling Jaskier a womaniser and says that he is just „falling in love with everyone“ as soon as he sees „them“, he spots „someone“ and is obsessed with „whoever“ is in front of him. You can see it in this post (https://heydrichmuller.tumblr.com/post/189946596054/my-brother-played-the-pronoun-game-wound-up) in which what the actor does is called „playing the pronoun game“. That‘s what lots of queer people do when talking about their love life/sexuality/partners/etc. I say it doesn‘t help because it actively paints the character he‘s playing as bi/pan, especially with the „he just loves everyone“ comment.

 Then there‘s another thing, now something that we can see in the show - movement.

Queer-coding hugely depends on clichés, I know that, but that doesn‘t mean that those clichés aren‘t true sometimes. So when I look at Jaskier‘s movements and he‘s moving his hands a certain way, cocking his hips and holding his hands there, cocking his head, I can‘t help seeing a queer person there. (https://gayregis.tumblr.com/post/189807338329/its-all-about-the-hand-gestures-joey-batey-as)

 That also brings me to the next point:

He‘s a Drama Queen. He gasps! And argues! And cannot believe the way he’s treated! He deserves better!

Now, one could say that He‘s a bard! That‘s what he does! It‘s to entertain people! But. Jaskier doesn‘t entertain people when he‘s being a drama queen. Instead, he‘s greatly annoying them with it and, at the most, only entertaining himself. This is mostly visible in the „You need a nap!“ scene, which also shows his exaggerated movements pretty well. (https://captainpoe.tumblr.com/post/189836119464/the-witcher-1x05-bottled-appetites)

 Then there are some other scenes that (to any queer person, I‘d say) just scream „this can‘t be straight, can it?“, simply bc it‘d be So Fucking Weird if it‘s actually meant to be straight...

One of those is the bathtub scene. Like, what, it‘s normal to rub your friend-not-friend‘s „lovely bottom“ with camomile? In what world??? And there‘s no reason Jaskier needs to do any of that, Geralt could have just bathed himself. (https://mrcavill.tumblr.com/post/189812738178)

From that we can go on to another part of the bathtub scene: „And yet, here we are“ (https://catness-tchalla.tumblr.com/post/his-189817475480), implying that Jaskier wants/needs Geralt.

 Jaskier‘s basically running after a fruitless friendship for over 10 years. He‘s showing real perseverance in befriending someone, while also employing excuses to do so (using the fact of being a bard and /having/ to sing about him/sharing his legacy as an excuse to stick close to him for so long). And he does try to have a kind of intimacy with a man who‘s generally seen as someone who‘s intimidating and driving everyone away. (https://thewitchersdaily.tumblr.com/post/189937577863/no-lord-in-his-right-mind-will-come-close-if)

Still, Jaskier‘s desperate to have his company and wants to continue travelling together to prove that he can be a good partner. (https://meldvnsk.tumblr.com/post/189961512351/me-when-i-see-how-desperately-jaskier-want-to-be)

 I do also want to make a point about Jaskier‘s outfits, although most of it can really be condensed into Well, He Is A Bard, So.

But I just want to state that there is no reason for him to still dress so extravagantly when he‘s just walking through the woods for days and weeks with Geralt. At first he has no other choice but, with the years, surely he can learn to have something more.... practical.... in his bag with him? But no, he chooses to keep his style and always look out of place. And, well, queer people are kinda known for the special care they take of their clothing (https://meldvnsk.tumblr.com/post/189960250906/jaskiers-outfits)

 Then I want to shine some light on the way Jaskier talks about him on their first day of meeting: https://thewitchersdaily.tumblr.com/post/189776322313/same-geralt-of-rivia-and-jaskier-in-the-witcher and https://skywalkrluke.tumblr.com/post/189956240667/the-witcher-2019. He is basically trying to please this, well, Manly Man™, with his (very awkward) compliments, akin to another scene we know - the „sexy goose“ fiasco, in which Jaskier totally fails in Flirting 101. (https://thewitcherdaily.tumblr.com/post/189811062630/the-witcher-1x06-rare-species)

 In episode 6, there‘s a scene that a lot of queer people can identify with (or at least I think so and I actually do). Jaskier is trying to comfort Geralt in a way, but also himself. He suggests leaving together, to „get away for a while“, to run away from all their problems while still sharing each other’s company. And what hits the most is the bard saying that No, he is not thinking about a new song right now, this is just about them, this is just about him trying to figure out what he himself wants. (https://skyvalker.tumblr.com/post/189947455079/the-witcher-2019-s01e06-rare-species)

 And now we come to the point where I can seriously not think anything else but „Oh boy, that guy is love with another man“: Her Sweet Kiss (https://youtu.be/NyZvWBFbIRw).

First off, the song is a reaction to Geralt‘s rejection of him and states how hurt he is by that rejection (https://captnswilson.tumblr.com/post/189886399796/if-life-could-give-me-one-blessing-it-would-be-to).

But I will go into a bit more detail, starting with the changes in the song that happened between the first time we hear it (start of episode 6) and the time we finally hear the finished song at the end of the episode.

 Firstly, „I‘m weak, love“ changed to „I‘m weak, my love“, underlining with the use of the possessive pronoun that whoever is the „I“ sings about their personal loved one.

Secondly, there‘s the line „garroter, jury and judge“.

We know that Geralt is the mentioned garroter (remember Marilka saying Geralt sounds like garroter in the first ep?). Now, what does it say that Jaskier is debating whether to use „gorgeous garroter“ or „lovely garroter“ in the song and then ends up using neither? My take on this is that the finished song focuses more on the pain he experiences than being a hymn on the heroic actions of the handsome Witcher. The idea of a gorgeous garroter has actually become, as Jaskier calls it, „too cerebral“.

 I‘ve talked quite a bit about the song now without having explained what I think it actually means, so let‘s come to that.

Her Sweet Kiss has three sets of personal pronouns - I, you, and she. I believe that those stand for Jaskier, Geralt and Yennefer respectively. Going with this choice of characters, it‘s fairly easy to see what the lyrics want to tell us.

In the first verse, Jaskier is basically just complaining about Yennefer. He paints her as the evil one, the one causing him heartache and pain.

I do not think that this verse, as I have read quite often, is written from Geralt‘s perspective. It doesn‘t make much sense regarding the use of pronouns and the meaning of the verse.

Why would Geralt complain about her and then call her his love? Why would he talk about her (using „she“ and „her“) and then switch to talking to her („Tell me, love“)?

It makes much more sense to say that this is Jaskier talking about „her“ (Yennefer) to his „love“ (Geralt), especially when one thinks about the line „How is that just?“.

 That last line of the verse shows Jaskier criticising Geralt‘s actions. It directly accuses him of being unjust towards Jaskier, something that was previously unheard of because the Witcher always does the thing that does the world justice. But in this case, the bard was left hurt by him without a good reason.

 When it comes to the chorus, there is nothing much to interpret. The lyrics plainly state that Geralt‘s relationship with Yennefer is destroying something. Looking at the context of Geralt and Yennefer „breaking up“, followed by Geralt forcing Jaskier to leave, this must clearly mean the destruction of Geralt‘s and Jaskier‘s friendship.

 The second verse starts with Jaskier warning Geralt of Yennefer, who is depicted as a dangerous current, pulling him closer into her clutches.

The verse then ends with the part we already know from the beginning of the episode.

 „I’m weak my love, and I am wanting

If this is the path I must trudge

I welcome my sentence

Give to you my penance

Garrotter, jury and judge“

 If you think this is Jaskier giving up and leaving Geralt alone after having accompanied him for more than a decade, having finally been judged and sentenced to a life without him by the famous garroter, then yes, we are exactly on the same wavelength there.

  (Of course I don‘t think that that‘s what the producers thought while making it but hey, that‘s exactly where the accidental queer-coding comes in again!

So, anyway, this is exactly why I see Jaskier as bi/pan but of course that‘s only my personal perspective.)

Tagging the people who helped me by making gifsets and sharing their thoughts on Jaskier:

@lola1b @pocketlibrary @heydrichmuller @gayregis @captainpoe @mrcavill @his-catness-tchalla @thewitchersdaily @meldvnsk @skywalkrluke @skyvalker @captnswilson 

[91percentpynch]

Jean‘s first Winter Barquet without the Ravens

look i have this in my head for a while now, so i thought i might as well share it with you guys!! i have absolutely no idea where this is going, guess will find out:) jerejan isn‘t a thing yet in this headcanon, but please keep in mind that they ARE in love,,, we will see where they‘re going,,, also please keep in mind that i never took french so if the french terms are wrong i‘m sorry <33

jean only owns the suits he was forced to wear with the ravens. obviously he had no time to take it with him and no one would bother to give him the few things he actually owned back, so he has nothing to wear

as he has a mental breakdown because the thought of meeting his ex-teammates alone gives him anxiety jeremy walks in, smiling softly as he asks „so i guess we should get you a nice suit for tonight. are you bringing someone by the way?“

the moment he sees jean on the floor he goes over to him and sits down next to him on the floor

„is there something that would make you feel better?“ jeremy asks quietly. „need a hug? or something else?“

jean just holds out his hand, a silent question jer quickly answers by taking his hand and softly squeezing it

„we got this dude, don‘t worry i‘ll keep you safe“ jeremy whispers as jean is trying to stop his sobs

„how exactly do you plan to stop them?“ jean asks, with a thick french accent he gets when his panic attacks are especially bad

„oh, a man never tells his secrets. you will see when we need to find out“, jeremy laughs.

they stay in that position for a while before slowly getting up to go to the mall to get jean a suit

when they sit in the car and jeremy‘s about to start his car he asks jean if it‘s okay to listen to music, or if he‘d rather have it quiet

„music, because quiet reminds me of them“, jean whispers, ashamed that he would allow to show weakness to his captain

„music it is my dude“, jeremy says and puts on his french playlist. „thought you might like that“, he looks flashing a grin at jean

jer obviously knew jean liked it, jean told jer about his love to music/ french music when they started talking, he told him it calms him down

jean just puts his head against the window, looking at nothing in peticular

at the mall they go into the first store who sells suits (because they‘re slightly stressed to make it back in time, they‘re both masters in procastination)

„okay so i thought of something, cause shopping for clothes is always super boring. so we both choose something for the other person and try it on together. you don‘t have to take my choice but you have to at least try it on“

„but you have terrible taste, jeremy. terrible“

„well than you can only improve the way i look, can‘t you?“, jer replies with a wink, „and my taste is perfectly fine“

jean doesn‘t reply to that, as the only thought in his head „everything is perfect about you, everything but the way you dress“, but he will not say such things to his captain

jeremy takes his lack of an answer as a yes and disappears to look for suits

sharing a dom for a few months and the fact that jer leaves his stuff lying around jean knows jer‘s size

not that he would be interested in jeremy, not that he would spend hours on end thinking about his captain

jean picks out a navy blue suit and a light grey bow tie which happens to have the exact same color as his eyes

slowly he goes looking for jeremy, who waits for him in front of the dressing rooms with his characteristic toothy grin

„okay show me what you got“, jer says when jean is within earshot

jean hands his finding over without a word - blushing a bit

jer takes it, hands jean a suit and diappears in the changinng room

jean slowly goes in the one next to jer and changes in the suit jer gave him

once he‘s done he looks at himself in the mirror

jeremy chose a light grey suit with a navy blue suit

they unintentionally match

when jean leaves the changin room, jer is already waiting, happily chatting with an employee about the exy season

he stands there awkwardly looking at jeremy, not saying a thing, until jeremey turns around and notices him

jeremy gives him a once over and nods satisfied with himself

„we‘re matching, i like that“, he says softly, blushing

„i have to admit, this is not as terrible as i thought it would end up to be. you look faboulous, no wonder when i pick out your outfit“

„well, you look rad as fuck my dude. you‘re definetly buying that, well not you but coach. coach told me to get us some nice suits, apparently the one i own is - i quote - ‚a unnecessary threat to society‘“

„he isn‘t wrong though“, jean says, a small smile on his lips.

„holy shit you‘re smiling, i either said something unbelieveable stupid or funny. i thought i had to talk french again to make you feel better“

jeremy took french as soon as he knew jean would come to the trojans so he could talk to jean in private, if needed to

„please don‘t. your french is terrible“, jean replies, his smile only getting bigger at the thought of jer‘s terrible pronounciation

„hey“, jer says jokingly offended

they change back in their regular clothes, pay the suits and head back to their dorm

„you wanna listen to that french music while we pack for tonight?“, jeremy asks quitely when they close their dorm door behind them

jean can only nod, his panic slowly growing

on the way to palmetto state - where the winter barquet will take place this year - jeremy sits next to jean

when jer notices jean getting nervouse/ anxiouse he offers him his hand

„my mom used to hold my hand when i was anxious, said she‘d keep me safe. thought it might help you as well“, jer is blushing again, avoiding jean‘s eyes

jean takes jer‘s hand without comment, thinking how soft they are over and over and over again

„why didn‘t you bring a date? i bet the ladies would kill someone to go on an event like that with a guy like you?“, jean asks jeremy in a sorry try to distract himself from the ever rising anxiety

„i‘m not into girls, first of all. and secondly i might like someone who would not be ready to with me there and i will not force them to do anything when they are clearly not ready“

jean pretty much stopped paying attention when jeremey said he was into guys

„what do you mean by ‚a guy like me‘?“, jer asks winking

„oh you know, unbelieveably annoying, decent looking, kind. isn‘t that what girls are into these days? i wouldn‘t know, all we got to be interested in was exy, exy, exy“, jean whispered, blushing

„annoying, huh?“, jer laughed.

jean didn‘t know what to reply so he decieded to stare out the window - definetly NOT thinking about how beautiful jeremy‘s eyes look in the stupid light of the bus

„hey wanna listen to the french music again? someone told me lately that my pronunciation is shit, so i need to listen to it anyways as this french guy won‘t help me out. we can share my headphones if you want?“

jean had never seen jeremy so shy, and he had to admit jer is even more adorable and attractive that way

not that jean would pay that much attention to jeremy knox

jean just nods unable to form a word, yet a sentence

when he put the headphone in his ear, he leans his head against the window and shortly after that falls asleep

when they arrived at palmetto state, jer wakes jean up softly

jean didn‘t let go of jer‘s hand - his grip only tightening- until they reached the home locker room where they would put their stuff and get changed for the barquet

„don‘t worry, i will keep you safe. i will punch anyone who looks at you funny“, jeremy whispers to jean when jean struggled to close the buttons of his shirt

jean‘s hand wouldn‘t stop shaking so jeremy closed the buttons of jean‘s shirt for him

jean suddenly gets very inappropriate thoughts while silently watching jer buttoning his shirt

„ready.“ jean answers, taking jer‘s hand

„ready?“ jer asks, holding out his hand, when they are changed

as soon as they entered the court jean looks for renee, in order to Not Look at the raven‘s table

obviously renee would spot him immediatly and drag her girlfriend alison with her to greet him

renee hugs him tightly completly ignoring jeremy

„i missed you, skyping just isn‘t enough j. you gotta visit me sometime. anyways i asked wymack to sit the foxes and the trojans together, so you can sit with me and tell me everything“, she said softly against his chest with a grin on her face.

jean isn‘t used to people being happy to see him so he is lowkey overwhelemed

„o- okay, but you gotta let me go first“

renee lets go almost immediatly, taking his other hand

it‘s only then that she notices jeremy

„oh god you two are matching, alison look they are matching“, she says excitedly

but alison only has eyes for her gorgeous girlfriend

jeremy laughs quietly while renee drags them to their seats

jean takes the place next to renee, jeremey sits next him, across from jean sits matt boyd, to matt‘s left kevin day and to matt‘s righ is dan

jean only focuses on renee though

they talk about school, their free time activities, the exy season, renee‘s plans for when she‘s done with college

jean does not let go of jeremy‘s hand until dinner arrives

they eat in silence, everyone‘s too busy with the delicous food

after everyone‘s done with dinner the tables are getting moved to the sides of the court, christmas music starts to play, someone brings the punch in and everyone starts to socialise

people are bringing their dates on the dance floor to slow dance under the mistletoes

„do you, uhm, do you maybe wanna dance with me?“, jer asks aggressivly blushing

„you wanna dance with me? what would the person you talked about on the bus would say to that?“, jean answers, having had a punch or two too much to calm his nerves

„that‘s what i‘m trying to find out right now actually“, jeremy replies shyly

„wait i‘m the mysterious guy you like? why?“, jean is suddenly not so drunk at all, rather confused than anything else

„dude have you looked in a mirror lately? i‘ve had a crush on you since i first saw you on court. started out as a stupid little crush, but then you started to live with me, play exy with me and i got to know you. you are so strong, so funny if you let yourself be, you are talented and so much more. i would add ‚good dancer‘ to that list, but you‘d have to dance with me for that“, jer says still blushing, avoiding his eyes

„okay, then let‘s show these losers how to dance“, jean replies, a small smile on his lips

jeremy knox liked him the way he liked him jeremy knox liked him the way he liked him jeremy knox liked him the way he liked him

so they ended up slow dancing at the edge of the dance floor

laila and renee saw them and took a quick picture of them before leaving them be

eventually it was only jean and jeremy, no ravens, no teams, no exy court

„i wanna see the stars“, jean says, suddenly having the urge to see the bright spots against the dark sky. needing to show jeremy, to make him understand

„i think it‘s okay when we disappear for a second“, jeremy says against his chest, as he still leans against jean from the slow dancing

so jean leads them out and as soon as they are outside he searches the night sky for the stars

when he found them jean points at them and says „look at the stars. you are the stars. you are bright and people look for you, people love you, people want to be with you. me? i‘m the night sky. i‘m dark, people are afraid of me. i am nothing worth looking at“

„jean, you are none of the things you said right now. if no one else i would always come looking at you. you are not dark. you surrived darkness and you came out of it. you surrived. you made it. and i am so unbelieveably proud of you. you are so strong and beautiful and if no one else, i want to be with you“

jean never cried, not when his parents sold him and homesickness almost killed him, not when riko tortured him, not when kevin left him alone in that hellhole, but this? silent tears are running down his cheeks

jer‘s hand is reaching up to his face to put them away, but he stops a few inches away, asking „may i?“

jean only asks

jeremy softly puts jean‘s tears away with his thumb

„i really wanna kiss you, can i kiss you?“, jeremy asks softly.

jean is unable to say a single word so he just nods and leans in to jer

and that‘s the story of their first ever kiss

it‘s also the story why jean calls jer „mon étoile“

[aw-eather]

Heather Watches SG1: s2ep22 Out of Mind and s3ep01 Into the Fire

Ah two of my all time favourites. Maybe even THE favourites. They’re just SO good. Also my shipper heart cannot take it but we love torturing ourselves here so lets go. 

I’m gonna try and do enough that y’all get at least one post a day and scheduel them to go up periodically :) 

This go very long so I hope it posts properly. 

Ooooh mysterious tank

I mean honestly this was suspicious from the get go

Don’t trust this guy

JACK

YOU’RE ALL WET JACK

Is he? 

Are they dead tho? Are you sure? Cause that sounds fake... 

You see, the year is now.............. 2077

CREDITS

Teal’c looks all big and scary but really he’s a precious boy

End credits

TERYL ROTHERY

honestly that device looks very Star Trek

Missed opportunity to make a 69 joke

Girl he has been asleep for 79 years he probably remembers shit all 

Good boy, answer nothing. Don‘t trust the random men that woke you up

thats not sarcasm, I don’t trust them either 

“the rest of the facility” riiiiiight

Wizard of Oz reference

38 teams is a lot of teams

MMMMMMMM sounds FAKE

DON’T TRUST HIM JACK

General whats his face just dropped something on the ground

STARGATE

Jack is handsome

Me: I’m gay

Jack O’Neill: Yeah sure ya bethcha 

Are ya just? What makes ya think Jack can help? he’s been asleep for 79 years

Tok’ra mind probe

Benefical alliance my ass, what did they ever really do for the Tau’ri??

Except promise to send a ship when they “had one available”

So thinking of Sam right now would be BAD Jack. 

NOX

I LOVE THE NOX

WHAT CUTIES

look at them, they’re so sweet

Jack stop thinking and showing them shit 

Could be a great weapon but the Nox are peaceful and beautiful and I love them

LITTLE GREY ALIENS WITH THE LITTLE GREY BUTTS

Thats a big ship

This is the only “look at all the shit we’ve managed to do so far” episode that is actually any good

Why don’t we meet the Furlings?

I wanna meet them 

They sound fluffy

I love the baby asgards look at ���em so cuuuuute

Kathrine! You’re great girly

“Touch it” *Jack touches it without knowing what it does, could die*

Jack waving his gun to touch the molecules seems like a bad idea

Yeah let him rest stop bullying him

purple goop

stop the pruple goop Jack

purple goop is never a good thing

Oh look... ANOTHER tank

DANNY BOY

Please cover your nipples

I don’t wanna see your man nipples

A third tank... funny that

SSSSAAAAAAMMMMMM

Funny how none of them are ACTUALLY dead

LIES WE’VE JUST SEEM THEM

Get these people some clothes

leaving her wrapped in a blanket is rude

Blanket looks like a mat tbh

BRATAC

SKARRA

Daniels hair is so bad in this episode I’m not sorry its HORRIBLE 

He has a SHIELD Jack

FUCK YEAH JACK THROW THAT KNIFE YAS

HATHOR

I love Hathor hosts

She’s great honestly

Sam and janet and the girls kicking ass is the best

RIP Hathor 

No seriously Daniel’s hair is BAD

Teal’c

JANET

ah yes, unusual 

Teal’c is so passionate and caring about his friends I love him so much

THREE FUCKING WEEKS?!?!?!?!

janet is such an angel you can’t convince me otherwise

Are they tho? 

Yeah he would but Teal’c with do anything for his F A M I L Y

Well he will leave

Aw Teal’c I love you with my entire heart

That zoom in on the patch is nice 

YES JACK STOP THE GOOP

Nice kick! 

BYE TEAL’C I LOVE YOU

AWW THIS EXCHANGE IS SO NICE 

AW THE SALUTE BABE NO THAT HURTS MY HEART ITS SO SWEET

#SorryNotSorry but Jack looks so fucking good in this outfit 

Like... he looks sooooo good

God I am questioning my sexuality left right and centre today

But seriously can he dress like that more often? 

Go get ya girl, Jack!

Oh look... not the SGC 

WHO WOULD HAVE EVER GUESSED

Serpant and Horus guards! :O

STOP THINKING BABE

THEY GONNA FIND YOOOOOU

SAAAAAAAAAM

BEAT THIS GUYS ASS AND SAVE. YOUR. GIRL

O U C H THAT WOULD FUCKING HURT

SHOULDER TOUCHING 

SHOULDER RUBBING

SHOULDER TOUCHING 

SHE IS TOUCHING HIM

I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD FOLLOWED BY A MEMORY OF HIM NEARLY DYING 

SHE’S STILL HOLDING HIS SHOULDER

STARING AT HER NAKED BACK

TRYING NOT TO STARE AT HER NAKED BACK

HE IS SO IN TROUBLE 

HE FANCIES HER SO MUCH 

I MEAN SAME

she also looks good but like he looks better???

GRABBING

WALL HOLDING

HANDS TOUCHING SHOULDERS

PINKY CURLED IN SO HE DOESN’T TOUCH BARE SKIN

COULD HAVE MOVED BUT ISN’T MOVING 

THEY WANNA HOLD EACH OTHER

DEAR GOD

sorry I’ll stop with the caps

I just physically cannot with those two

i love them so much

and i hate how they were treatd

Hathor you idiot, 

SUANNE

LOL Jack 

Servants in the royal court? Yeah sounds great

Rude Jack

lol the pat on the shoulder Jack you dick

uuuuuuhhhhh didn’t notice before how HOT IT IS WHEN HATHOR RUNS THE IDC REMOTE UNDER SAMS CHIN AND THE LOOK SAM GIVES HER I-

ACK SNAKE

I hate them the same way Jack does tbh

they make me squirm

Give it to Daniel. Why is Daniel the only one that never has a snake in him... wait... 

sorry but I just wanna talk with the national captions institute... 

Alright! On to Into the Fire! 

DAVIS

MAJOR DAVIS I LOVE YOU

MY FAVOURITE

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH EVEN IF THINGS DO FALL TO SHIT WHENEVER YOU’RE THERE

Dramatic zooooom on Hathors name for E M P H A S I S 

CREDITS

I love how Hammond is like EVERYONE is saving SG1

How DARE you, Daivs. They are THE team, rude!

I love that everyone steps forward because everyone loves SG1 but also everyone knows you don’t leave anyone else behind. 

I love Hammond

MARTIN WOOD :O

He is a great director

Ew snake

Jack still looks fucking good 

Jack now is not the time for sass 

Give it to Daniel. No one cares

Sam is like “I’m not scared bitch bring it”

Of course it wants Jack

Poor Jack

Why is it always him?? 

You tried, buddy

Sam’s hand on his CHEST PLEASE JUST GET MARRIED

TEAL’C 

BRATAC

Sam literally hates watching Jack in any pain 

Poor Jack

Hathor fuck off

What exactly was the point of ripping his shirt? It makes no difference to the snake going in the back of HIS HEAD

Ew

oh gross

i hate it

I hate it so much

ugh the chills I currently have

Suanne Baun is super pretty though

YAS TOK’RA LADY

WE RESPECT AND LOVE YOU

Another Wizard of Oz reference 

Sorry Daniel looks so bad

its the hair honestly, the little dorky fringe

Sam’s hair, on the other hand *chefs kiss*

Yeah but he’ll be fine, Tok’ra lady saved the day <3 

YAS GIRL

NOOO Poor Tok’ra lady

Sorry fam, I forgot her name lol 

Sam pulling that jacket on, Sam in a jacket thats a little too big for her , Sam in a white shirt.. Sam

Yeah they are Teal’c. 

Dead and false and dead... or is he???

Hand dance

Energy barrier is in the way, boys continue to shoot

oh no shooting towers of death are never a good sign

And of course Daniel got hurt so we have to baby him for the rest of the fucking episode jfc just sit him down somewhere and Sam and the rest of the teams can do the hard work... again

Cool Tok’ra tunnels are Cool

Lol Daniel being sassy (oh its just a deep, bleeding gash, it’ll be fine) lol sorry he is funny when he’s sassy

I’m sick of your army already, Hathor

OOOOH a barrier 

Hammond is awaiting 

Why do they give them such short time periods to do shit? Like they know things go wrong literally ALL THE TIME 

Like “hi you have 24 hours to go into a SECURE, GOA’ULD FACILITY, RETRIEVE THREE SG MEMBERS AND GET OUT. PIECE.OF.CAKE”

6 hours is a long time to sit on your hands and do nothing tho. Ah well might as well go and save the boyfriend

The president can suck a rotten potatoe

Davis, you can’t really argue with him, he outranks you about 4 times

Sam’s sleeves are too long and baggy and its SO CUTE

GO SAM

SAVE THE DAY

BUT SAVE YOUR BOYFRIEND FIRST 

Hammond visiting Chulak 

because he’s an angel baby

and the best dad ever to his four kids; Major Dr Science Space Baby, Sassy Grumpy Fruit Loop and Sam Carter Loving Space Baby, Warrior Gentle Giant Space Baby and Annoying, Doesn’t know shit, Archaeologist Space Baby.

Yas Teal’c, spill that tea

I will join you, bb

Hammond in a toga will also join you cause he a babe

and he needs your help cause Davis said No. 

HAMMOND OF TEXAS IS MY FAVOURITE THING EVER I LOVE IT 

Sam: I’m gonna go and shut this shield down

Sam: but not until I have tried to save my Future Husband. 

Poor Tok’ra lady

Hand on chest again

Fucking Hathor man

Go away boo, you’re ruining the moment 

Stop hurting Sam

YAS JACK FUCK YES I LOVE THAT

I love his response to it too

Like the shock and fear

This hug goes on a long time

I know he’s cold or whatever but like... 

and I know he’s in shock and so is she a bit

he’s doing it for her as much as him

but they’re STILL hugging

They literally never do this again

Its so sweet because after this its just... nothing? Like POV happens and then Upgrade and Divide and Conquer and they go ah fuck we can’t hug anymore so all we get is platonic shoulder holding and using shoulders as pillows. The closes we get to a hug is Death Knell and emotional trauma Threads. I want a REAL hug

And he holds her arms for ages and helps her up

Wow they’re so fucking in love this hurts

“Found ‘em” Jack stop so cute

C4! Who’d have thought it

Ah shit they’re surrounded 

He still looks good

They BOTH look good 

They make a great couple 

Nope, not really but its what ya got so you’re gonna have to deal with it

This general guy is a bit of a dick

Thats right Sam, don’t listen. Good job, Danny boy.

Only 1? Thats not a lot of time

Get out there, Jack! Buy that time

Gun Bum! (if you know Sanctuary, you’ll get it)

He’s really not doing a great job of pretending to be a Goa’uld

Its really not impossible 

ex-goddess lol 

“She’s Gone. She is no more.” I’m honestly shocked people didn’t shoot him more often 

I love him tho

Thank god, thats good timing

Hammond is IN. HIS. ELEMENT 

There is no way she heard hiom say now but she still knew. I love them. I love how well they know each other and they’ve only known each other a little over two years

Time to KICK SOME ASS

JAFFA YAS

ooh coming in from behind, sneaky

YEEHAW

OH HAMMOND YOU PRECIOUS BABY

Sam going straight to Jack and it looks like she goes to put her arm around him. 

I hate them ffs

Bra’tac and Human fuck me thats so cute

Sam’s smile when they see Teal’c and Hammond is Gorgeous

and Hammond patting her on the back! stop! I love Space Dad and his idiot Space babies. 

Final Thoughts:

Seriously guys this is my favourite Final and First eps of a season. 

100% one of my favourite two parters, if not my all time favourite two parter

Great direction, good story, excellent bad guys, good acting, just enough suspense with out being too drawn out, something for everyone, comes of the back of a fun as fuck episode (1969), Hammond has a big part, Davis is there, lots of cute Sam/Jack and of course, Daniel’s Elf Hair. 

Also the Tok’ra are actually useful in this one which is SHOCKING 

Lemme know your thoghts friends, I’m excited to hear them!