#After all the awful movies put out the last few years this one is just cheesy and FUN.

[rahabs]

Yes I did buy the Biblical Christmas musical movie.

[unconventional-lawnchair]

A Second Chance pt.3 {Blurb}

Poly!Marauders+Lily x Fem!Reader - Zombie Apocalypse Au

Stick Season Noah Kahan

Masterlist

Summary: Reader has sometime with Remus, before she is sent out alone with Sirius}

Cw; Guns, death, zombies go nom nom , a lot of baby talk, cussing, minor character death, Zombie apocalypse typical violence, infants)

a/n- This is totally just filler, but next chapter is going to be very intense, so warning ahead of time

Wc-2464

Amazing People- @mooonyxoxo @sippinpeachtea @amethyistheart @zjasminelouvre3 @idonotknowenglish @le-clair-de-lune @shylahstarzz

You hadn't slept a wink. Still staring out the window with Hermione against your chest. She had fistfuls of your shirt, and you couldn't bring yourself to put her down, far too anxious of what would happen to her. Your mind wandered to the worst but just because you were terrified didn't mean the world stopped turning.

Eventually, Hemione woke up and gave her soft fussy gurgles. You stood up and tried to stay quiet. Lily had laid in the bed last night, and must have fallen asleep with Harry. They were both sleeping soundly, so you didn't want to disturb them. 

If last night had happened any other time, at any other place, with anyone else, you would have kicked them out. Send them straight back to the woods. It was cruel, but you weren't going to keep around people you didn't trust. However, they had Harry and your friends have done dumber things in the past. They seemed like truly good people, that was rare nowadays, and company of your own age wasn't entirely awful. 

Everyone was going through this for the first time. You did know one thing, however, Sirius was not to be trusted to have Hermione’s best interest at heart. 

You went about your routine, making your way to the kitchen, feeding her with what little milk you could find. You don't know much about about babies, again, you used to find them extremely annoying, but you knew that when Mrs. Granger first had Hermione, she could hardly lift her limbs.

Her husband had asked you to scavenge any nuts you could find, specifically almonds or cashews, he said it wasn't ideal but if he could use it with his water supply he could make a suitable replacement until his wife was better. It was crazy to think they were gone. Did they even think that it was a possibility? That you would be looking after their baby girl?

It was life or death in the moment, but they had made a point to involve you from day one. You hadn't been entirely close, but even if they were just a few years older than you, you looked up to them. So much resolve, tenacity, and with a bond you saw in the movies. It's crazy to think you had been traveling with them for two years, and suddenly, they were gone.

Thinking about it now, Mr. Granger made a point of teaching you what he knew, Mrs. Granger had made sure you were the first person Hermione was comfortable being held by at such a young age. For nine months you had to hear the nervous but excited soon to be dad rattle on facts about newborns that you now used day to day. Barty used to joke you were ready for your own, you could still remember the absolutely horrified look Regulus had when the thought of you as a mother came across his mind. Evan’s laughter rang in your ears as you elbowed Barty in the side for the sly comment.

Maybe they did have a feeling. They were always smarter than you.

You were snapped out of your thoughts when you heard Hermione give another gurgle, quickly you set the milk down and began to rub her back. You were distracted, again.

Using as little formula as you could with the abomination of handmade nut milk was the most sustainable option. Just three more months and it would be time to worry about getting your hands on mashed food. The stress of it all wasn't necessarily bad, you found yourself waking up every morning with someone to be awake for.

Cooing at her as you swayed around to keep her calm. You had to admit, she was a cute little thing. Even if it wasn't what you wanted, even if you lost the people dearest to you, you wouldn't go back. The idea that any other outcome would have resulted in those monsters getting their hands on her terrified you more than anything.

Those bandits, the so-called “Death Eaters” like some pathetic indie rock band name, were ruthless. They first started appearing about a year ago, they had even attempted to recruit your group. 

Some religious ramblings about the worthy and the righteous, always fell on deaf ears for you. Even then, they seemed particularly insane. Speaking of the rapture and innocence leaving the community around you. That the most dignified should step up and show why they were worthy to be on earth.

That was when, of course, you had just met the group.

You weren't as skilled as you were now, but you had been alone for months when this all started. Trial and error had your best interest at heart, until skill slowly took over. When you met them, you were not the most.. easy person.

As in you stabbed, who you later learned to be Barty, right threw the hand. To your absolute horror he called you hot for it. The damn psycho. You missed him. 

Evan wasn't far behind in thinking you were just the best thing since sliced bread. Maybe it was the change in faces around their boring camp, but you quickly went from some stranger they hunted with, to someone who would pop up at their camp. Eventually, you never left. You made friends with the people there, and being a part of a group made you feel safe since the first time it all happened.

Maybe that was another reason why you were so determined to keep these people around. You wanted nothing more than to be witnessed. 

You were once again rudely snapped from your thoughts at the feeling of being watched. You hated that feeling. You turned to look at the doorway from the hall to the kitchen and locked eyes with that Remus boy. He looked to be sweating, but trying to hide how much pain he was clearly in. He seemed startled to see you, slowly smiling and you nodded to him, turning to look out the window.

He joined you in silence, using two chairs to prop his ankle up above his heart. 

Eventually, he spoke up.

“How did you sleep?” 

“I didn't. Couldn't.” You mused and after a moment of silence you turned to see him again. His eyes were closed but he didn't seem to be dozing. “... did you sleep?”

“Couldn't.” He responded and you nodded. “The pain or your friend?”

“Both.” He mumbled and slowly opened his eyes. “He.. we'd known him since we were 11.” 

He seemed so solemn. It didn't even cross your mind they may have known each other from back before the change. You walked over and took a seat beside him, and he continued. “He was always a bit of an anxious kid, maybe he did some things I need to think twice about but.. I never would of figured him to..” 

“Yeah.” You whispered. “No one wants to think of a friend that way.”

You rolled your tongue. It was hard to hold a conversation, truly. You had been alone for a month, before that you spent two years of your life with people you mostly listened to. 

“So,” Remus began. “If you don't mind me asking, where were you when this all started?”

The question grew worn and weary with each new encounter, gradually losing its significance. It was more common than normal formalities at this point. 

It held a certain importance, though, as it let many saps share their story with another person. It was a way to ensure that, even in your absence, at least one person would know your story. That you weren't lost in this world like the thousands of others who were gone. So, when the inevitable end came, whether in the tearing grip of zombies or other perils that watched you in the tree line, someone would carry your memory until it became their turn.

It just seemed to hit you, everyone in that camp. Regulus, Barty, Evans, the Grangers. Their stories were now all that was left of them. Right.

You hoped to be so lucky to tell Hermione of the heroes her parents were. The lives they saved, including yours and her own. 

“It's a.. long story.” You sighed and he nodded. 

“Is there anything else to do?” Remus offered and you purse your lips. 

“Actually,” You looked out the window and bit your cheek. The sun was rising slowly, you didn't need to be anywhere just yet. “Short version.”

Remus leaned back against his chair and nodded before you took a deep breath.

“My dad, he worked for the military. He used to take me on these hunting trips with his coworkers. These two idiots and a pretty cool veteran.”

“Is that how you shot down that buck?”

“Learned from the best.” You nodded, smiling down at Hermione as you ran your hand soothingly down her back. “My dad and I got into this big fight.” You whispered, smile fading. “I took a hike early to get away from them all. They were being.. men.”

“Men?” Remus smirked.

“Men.” You cheeked. Remus was easy to be playful with. “On my walk, there was this guy. He looked unconscious. It was.. it was a bit jarring. Then when I called for help he got up. He was eating meat of some kind.”

You shuttered as you remembered so clearly the crazed and red faced man looking at you. Like you were his next meal. “And then my dads friend, Mr. Prewett came out of nowhere. He jumped in front of me and this guys just- well.. you can assume what happened. I went back to camp and I told my dad. He panicked and called the sheriff office.” You waved your free hand. “Useless. Eventually, there was this mass panic and people chasing each other. My dad packed up the car and told me to drive. To go home and wait for him and his friends there. He just.. never came back.”

Remus nodded along thoughtfully.

“What of you five?” You asked in kind. He fiddled with his nail. 

“We had just been sent home from boarding school. We were on a train home and suddenly it just stopped.” Refused recounted the horrified screams and the mass panic. Remembering locking their compartment and drawing the curtains. The sounds of tearing and horrified screams etched into his memory.

You winced a bit. “A train?”

“Right? I mean, who starts these things off on a train?”

Okay, that made you laugh. The cheeky bugger. “How did you make it out?”

“Lily broke a window.” 

“That.. makes sense. She seems like she has a thing or two going for her upstairs.”

“Something the other two lack.”

Okay, he was definitely charming too. A sense of humor could go a long way. A comfortable silence settled over you, before you saw how late it was getting. You began to stand and Remus winced as he shifted to look at you. 

“Where are you headed?”

“The spring further down the forest line. It's fresh water and I have an embarrassing purifier.” 

“You're taking her?” 

“...” You usually did take littler Hermione with you, you hated to be so far from the house without her. You knew it would be easier, however, to leave her behind. 

“I-”

“I'll watch her.” Remus offered gently.

Your eyes locked onto his hazels. You searched them with a determined tightness in your chest. Remus had never done anything to make you think he might hurt her. Something about the boy reminded you of safety in its purest form.

But you weren't going to just trust your gut. Not again.

“I'll set her down in the livingroom. If she cries-”

“I'll be here. I promise.” 

You slowly nodded and gave him a brief pained smile. His eyes were soft and so was his curled lips. Showing you a gentleness you only saw after you met the group. It frustrated you to no end, to not understand why your heart was clenching so painful and desperate in your chest at just a look.

You turned sharply and walked into the livingroom, past the sleeping figures to hide her away in the corner as you always did. You made a point to not look at Sirius nor James.

James seemed distraught, holding his curly strands of hair in between his fingers. Eyes bloodshot.

Seems no one slept.

“I am going out, down to the stream. It's a walk, so I'll be back by the time the sun goes down.” You informed them, it felt odd to have someone to report to again.

Walking past them, James suddenly stood up on his feet before he stumbled a bit. “Alone? You're going alone?”

Sirius came to grab his wrist and help him stay up.

You looked back at them with a quizzing look. “Yes. We need water. I figured the idea would make you happy.”

James shook his head. “No- no- water, it's- it's great.” He mumbled and stared at you. His eyes were low and filled with concern. You should have walked away, but he looked like a wounded puppy.

“Is that.. okay, James?” You whispered back. It was hard to stay too stern with him. 

“It is just.. just alone?” He pushed and you slowly crossed your arms.

“I have survived plenty long without-”

“I-I'll go with you! We can be quicker too, I'm pretty strong I-”

“James.” You cut in on his words sharply and his eyebrows pinched together with a sad look. “... yes?”

Merlin, you see why Lily was so taken with him. If the current situation was anything else-

“I will be fine alone.” You insisted before Sirius cleared his throat. 

“You?” You glared at Sirius, this time, unlike yesterday, he didn't shy away. “I'll go with you.”

“No.”

“Can't really stop me, can you?” Sirius mused and picked up James's gun. You glared at him harder and he sighed, handing it back to James. 

“No weapons.” He comprised.

“And you travel ahead of me.” You huffed, the black haired boy slowly smirked. “Darling, I don't have a clue where we're going.”

You rolled your eyes. “Just bloody- follow me then.”

Before he could make another comment you walked to the door and began to leave. James seemed to visually relax, and Sirius hurried after you.

“Don't slow me down.” You warned him, stepping into the porch. The outside was calm and serine, but there was this sinking feeling in your chest that only grew worse as you tried to catch something in the tree line. 

It felt like you were being watched. You hated that feeling.

Your thoughts were suddenly cut out of your mind when you heard Sirius.

“Wouldn't dream of it.”

[turcott3]

unwritten

ethan edwards x fem! reader

warnings?: cursing, angst, fluff, kisses

masterlist

-

you hopped off your bed to the light taps on your door. you opened the door expecting to see your mom but instead are met with the presence of your long time close friend.

“ethan?” you question, scanning the look on his face. to you, he was never hard to read and you could tell something was wrong.

“can i come in?” he asks.

“yeah yeah of course.” you say back up and letting the boy into your room. you sit back in your spot on the bed as he stands in silence after putting his bag down, typing something on his phone.

“what’s wrong with you?” you ask, noting his unbreakable frown.

“huh?”

“what’s wrong? are you okay?” you ask.

“yeah i just-“ he starts and pauses, trying to think of what to say. you could tell he was holding back.

“just spill, you know i wouldn’t judge you.” you say, hoping to soothe the boy, something you’d figured out years ago.

“well, you know it was my last day of classes and i’d been talking to one of my classmates, in class of course, and we were kinda like getting close and flirting whatever. like an in class crush type of deal and i was gonna ask for her number today but then. fuck.” he pauses, pressing his lips to a thin line.

“and then?” you urge him to continue.

“she fucking asked me if luca was single.” he sighs out.

“well that’s just rude of her.” you say, seeing how he would react.

“i gave her his snap and stuff but like, i don’t know. it made me feel really terrible.”

“i mean that’s fair, but why?”

“because y/n. this shit always happens to me. every single time i think i have a shot at a girl, she wants one of my friends. like am i not good enough? not attractive? like what’s so wrong with me that i can’t be wanted.” he breathes out.

“oh eddy.” you frown, beckoning him to sit on your bed.

“i’m sorry, that was a lot you probably didn’t wanna hear.”

“no no, keep talking, i know there’s more. it’ll make you feel better.” you say placing a sympathetic hand on his arm.

“i just want someone to love me and to want me. i’m 21 for christs sake. all of my teammates and my friends have girlfriends. i just feel left out and it sucks. i’m happy for them of course but i just want someone for me to love and they love me back. i really don’t feel like im asking that much.” he says, trying to hide the tears that fell as he spoke from his heart.

“no one will sit and listen to how i feel, ever. the feeling of being unwanted is like this endless fucking void that can’t just be filled by hookups, i just feel myself slipping deeper everyday.” he continues, less shy about his tears now. you lean up and wrap your arms around him in his fragile state, causing him to release the damn that threatened to break. you lean back, holding the brunette to your chest. the two of you were never very physical but at this moment it was the only thing you could think of to help him.

“i’ll listen ethan, i’ll always listen to you. i’ll always be here for you. it’s gonna be okay.” you say, hugging onto him tighter. you hated seeing him this upset, you’d never seen him like this before and it broke your heart. you found yourself shedding a few tears yourself. he sits up from your grip and observes your state, tears dampening your cheeks.

“why are you crying y/n?” he perks up, wiping the tears that fell.

“because ed, i can’t stand hearing you say this. i can’t believe YOU feel unwanted and unloved. people are stupid to not see who you are. ethan, you’re so lovable and everyone is a fucking dumbass for not wanting you. you’re the sweetest guy i’ve ever met, and i know we’ve been friends since forever ago but i feel awful. i feel like i could do more to make you feel better.” you say remaining strong on your statement, the urge to cry fading away.

“how about this, you stay the night with me. we have a movie night and stay up and talk and then tomorrow we have a lake day. just me and you.” you offer as he nuzzles back to your chest. an unfamiliar feeling.

“your dad will let us take the boat?” he asks.

“i mean he won’t let anyone else drive it except you so.” you giggle.

“for real?” he says sitting up.

“yes.”

“sick.” he replies, getting comfortable on his side of the bed for the night. the two of you sat in a soothing silence as a movie played on your tv. as the a/c kicked in you grew cold, goosebumps littering your skin. you buried yourself under your comforter, trying to avoid making your discomfort being obvious.

“you good?” he asks.

“yeah, just really fucking freezing.”

“come here.” he says pulling the covers over him, pulling you to his side. you drape your arm over his toned and shirtless abdomen, you heart rate spiking at the contact. you didn’t know why you felt so nervous. well you did, but you weren’t going to admit it.

“thank you eddy.”

“of course y/n/n.” he smiles, placing his chin on top of your head. you could get used to the feeling of being in his warm embrace. as the night continued, you hardly lost contact with each other. talking and laughing in the comfort of his arms.

“you think we should go to sleep?” you sit up checking the time on your phone.

“probably, we got a busy day tomorrow.” he giggles, shutting your tv off and laying down getting comfortable.

“g’night ethan.”

“night y/n, sleep good.” he says quietly as the two of you drifted off to sleep with the thought of each other on your minds.

-

“you ready?” you ask standing on your back deck.

“as i’ll ever be.” he smiles, taking the bag from you and walking down the deck. he steps onto the bought tossing the back to the ground before reaching out a hand to help you onto the boat.

“thank you kind sir.”

“of course madam.” he replies and a smile spreads widely across your cheeks.

“alright let’s get this shit show on the road.” he says turning the key, the engine kicking on.

“please don’t get me beat up this time.” you say grabbing onto his shoulders.

“i’ll try.” he smiles as you sit in the co pilot seat.

“good.” you reply, relaxing as he cruised off smoothly. you loved watching him drive as he smiled, bringing the two of you to corners of the lake you hadn’t seen before, your heart fluttering as he talked about all the good memories he had with his buddies there, but the feeling of sadness oozing its way in. he hasn’t been with them much outside of hockey in months, let alone here on the lake.

he slowed the boat to a stop, shutting off the engine and tossing the anchor off the edge. you were in a quiet area, no other boats anywhere to be found. he sat back in his seat without a word. you stretched your arms out as you got comfortable in your seat, ethan taking your hand in his from across the walkway. your face slowly turning pink as he adjusted his grip on your hand as he sat on his phone. his thumb brushing back and forth on your knuckles gently.

“hey eddy.” you say and he looks up not letting go.

“i’m glad you’re here with me.” you smile, squeezing his hand.

“me too.”

“i’ve never seen these parts of the lake before, they’re gorgeous.” you say, taking in the territory around you.

“i was hoping i could make some new memories here.” he smiles turning his head to look at you.

“well i hope im doing an okay job.”

“you’re doing more than okay y/n.” he giggles, a blush spreading across his face. you stand up out of your chair, sadly letting go of his hand.

“shall we?” you ask, holding up your life jackets.

“we shall.” he smiles. moments later, the two of you jumping into the water.

“jesus it’s cold.” you say re-emerging from the water.

“a little yeah.” ethan giggles, shaking the water out of his hair. you swim over to him, wrapping your arms gently around his neck, resting your chin on his shoulder from behind.

“i think that’s a little better.” he says quietly.

“yeah.” you sigh. the two of you remained in the water for a while longer swimming and talking, laughing. it felt nice to be out on the lake alone with your best friend, who you soon hoped would be more than that.

“should we go find a new spot?” ethan asks, helping you back onto the boat.

“yeah we should.” you reply, wrapping yourself in a towel and sitting on the bench seat, ethan plopping down right next to you.

“today has been really fun y/n.” he smiles at you.

“yeah it has.” you reply.

“for the first time in a while i’m not worried about anything else. i haven’t felt this content in so long.”

“me either ed. i’m so happy to be here with you right now.” you smile, taking his hand back into yours. you say in a comfortable silence for a brief moment before he takes your cheeks into his hands, bringing your lips to his for a moment. he pulls away as your face burns red. you were scared he would regret it.

“i’m sorry that was-“ he starts and you interrupt him by pulling him back to your lips, melting into the kiss instantly, his hands placed delicately on your waist as your hands rest comfortably on his cheeks. you pull away giggling as he’s forehead lands on your collar bone. you kiss him on the temple as he sits up.

“let’s go to a new spot yeah?” you ask, brushing his hair out of his face.

“okay.” he smiles softly, the two of you taking your place back in your seats.

-

you say freshly showered on your bed as ethan returns, brushing his hair dry with his towel. he tosses the towel in your hamper and hops back onto your bed, finding his way cuddled to your side.

“hey ethan.” you say, twisting his damp locks between your fingers.

“yeah?” he asks leaning up a bit.

“seeing you so fragile yesterday was honestly really hard for me, i wasn’t really sure why but, i know now.”

“what was it?”

“because all this time i wanted you.”

“what do you mean?”

“i want you ed. i want to hold you, kiss you, love you. it broke my heart hearing how unwanted you felt. but it hurt me because i had gone so long feeling this way and ignored my feelings.“ you admit and he smiles.

“i’ve liked you for years, i was just scared you’d never feel the same way. i just wanted female attention to replace how i felt about you. i didn’t wanna ruin our friendship.”

“i love you ethan. so much. please let me love you, the way you deserve it.” you say as he pulls you into his chest.

“thank you y/n. god, i love you so fucking much.” he replies lifting your chin with two fingers and bringing your lips back to his, the two of you now more inseparable than before.

-

[helloalycia]

𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋 [𝐓𝐖𝐎] — 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐄 𝐑𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐘

one / three / masterlist / wattpad

summary: as you and Skye try to relearn how to be friends again, you realise it’s harder than you thought.

warning/s: mentions of injury, substance abuse, poor mental health and basically everything Skye goes through oof.

author's note: here’s part 2! so sorry it was delayed, i’ve been stuffed with cold for the past few days so didn’t have chance to share it. Hope this makes up for it anyway :)

"...and I'm just outside your building now," I said to Skye over the phone, lingering outside.

"I was just about to call," she said in a rushed voice, sounding apologetic. "I'm running late, but I'm almost there. Give or take ten minutes. You can head straight up. The doorman knows to let you in and the spare key is in the same place as always."

I hesitated at her response.

It wasn't a big deal, I'd been to her apartment many times, but it had also been a year since I'd last been and it felt strange to go up alone. Especially because I was just supposed to be meeting her to go out, not actually going inside.

"Oh, I can just wait outside, it's okay," I said, maybe a little too quickly, but she didn't seem to notice.

"No, it's fine, you head up, I'll be with you soon," she assured me, before I heard a sound in the background. "I gotta go. See you in ten!"

I chewed my lip before putting my phone away and heading straight inside. As Skye said, the doorman recognised me and let me straight up, and it felt odd. The last time I'd been in the lift, I was crying on the way down from that awful argument between Skye and I. I hadn't been back since – I'd had no need to. But now...

It wasn't the same, I had to remind myself of that. She wasn't the same. None of this was.

Over the past few weeks, we'd somewhat returned to how things used to be, but it was all baby steps. Being each other's friend was second nature, and yet moments like this sometimes had me stumbling in the dark.

I found her door at the end of the hall, digging out the spare key from behind the framed painting next to it. A stupid place to keep it I'd always thought, but the whole place was guarded anyway so it didn't matter.

After opening the door, I returned the key to its spot before letting myself in. Everything looked the same as I last remembered it, and I didn't want to admit it to myself, but I'd missed it. I still remembered when she bought it and moved in, after her career picked up overnight. We'd had countless movie nights here, sleepovers that lasted days sometimes, and it just brought back so many memories. Good, as well as bad, but I tried not to focus on the latter.

I began to walk around aimlessly, waiting for her to return, eyeing the cabinet full of awards, the framed albums, admiring the penthouse view from her living room, and then I came across some framed photos hung on the wall. Some were of her and her mum when she was a kid, others were as she grew up, and then I spotted a familiar one.

It was a photo of Skye performing her first ever single on her first ever TV appearance years ago, and it was a photo taken by me, one of my first professional gigs as a photographer. A small smile tugged at my lips, realising she hadn't taken it down. I was touched that she kept it.

The door opening made me glance away and see Skye rushing in, looking a bit dishevelled. When she spotted me, she smiled with relief.

"Hey, sorry, I didn't mean to run late," she said as she closed the door behind her.

"It's fine," I said dismissively, before joking, "You know, you're a little too trustworthy. It's been a year. I totally could have come up here and, like, I don't know, robbed you or something. Sold your shit on eBay."

She tossed her bag to the couch as she laughed quietly, quirking a brow. "Oh, really? A year and you've suddenly turned into a criminal?"

"I could've."

"What a personality change."

I laughed as she stopped by my side, nudging me in the arm slightly, before her gaze fell to the photos hung on the wall.

"Ah, going through memory lane, I see," she teased lightheartedly.

I glanced at her with a slight smile. "It's cute that you've still got it. Even if it is a terrible photo."

"It's not," she said with a chuckle, looking at it with pride. "It's a two in one, I had to keep it. My first TV appearance and the day I met you. It just makes it extra special that you took the photo."  

My cheeks grew warm at her words, and I found myself staring at her profile as she smiled reminiscently at the photo. We'd come so far since then and yet I still did a double take whenever I looked to her. Maybe some things hadn't changed...

"I'm just gonna change my clothes and then we can head out," she said after a moment. "Won't be long."

"It's cool, take your time," I said with a nod, watching as she went to her room, before looking back to the photo and finding myself smiling all over again.

—

Becoming friends with Skye again made it easy to remember all the best parts of having a friendship with her, so much that I almost forgot what led to everything being ruined in the first place.

Of course there was the substance abuse, but the reason for that was the anxieties and stresses that came with being one of the most popular celebrities in the world. And it definitely didn't help that Skye never had a lot of support from her team, who only ever saw her as a commodity. Clearly that hadn't changed.

I'd just finished some work one morning and had plans to hang out with Skye after, maybe catch a movie or something as she had the day off, we hadn't really decided. But when I called her, she answered groggily.

"Hey, Skye, you good?" I asked jokingly.

She made a sound like a yawn before humming. "Yes, sorry, I was just napping. Just been tired."

"Oh, I was calling to say I'm free now, but we can rearrange if–"

"No, no, I want to see you," she cut me off with assurance, forcing herself to sound more lively. "A movie, right? Or lunch?"

I tried not to snicker. "Skye, it's your day off and you sound exhausted. It's alright."

"I'm fine, honest," she said confidently, or an attempt at it. "Please, I was looking forward to seeing you."

I sighed, debating whether or not to listen to her. Then, I thought of a solution. "How about we stay in? I can come to yours and we can watch a movie there?"

"Yes, I'd love that," she said with a hint of relief. "Thank you. I'll get the blankets warmed up in the dryer, ready for your arrival."

I laughed quietly. "Sounds good. I'll bring some snacks and be over soon."

And just like that, we both kept to our word and got comfortable on her couch barely half an hour later. Snacks were laid out on the coffee table whilst two fluffy blankets covered us completely. Still, we leaned against each other for warmth.

Skye was definitely burnt out, her general enthusiasm diminished temporarily and her movements sluggish, but she was smiling all the same as she spent time with me. I knew she meant it, but it still worried me that she wasn't getting enough time to simply rest.

"How's tour stuff going?" I asked as she loaded up a film on Netflix.

She shrugged as she focused on the task at hand. "Alright. Been busy. You know how it can get."

I glanced at her. "I do."

She must have noticed my staring as she stopped what she was doing and looked over at me with an amused smile. "What?"

"Nothing," I said nonchalantly, looking to the TV. "Just remember that you can take a break if you need to. It's important or you'll risk burning out."

She sighed, leaning her head on my shoulder and playing with the blanket mindlessly. "I know. I am."

"Enough breaks," I clarified, watching her hands play with it. "I mean, your team are supportive, I'm sure, but they don't always know what's best for you."

She snorted with amusement, glancing up at me. "And you do?"

I met her gaze, half playful and half serious. "Maybe. Maybe not. But I'll always be an advocate of you taking a freakin' break."

She suppressed a smile as she nudged me appreciatively. "You're right. I will. I guess I've just been busy making sure everything is perfect. It has to be, you know? Especially after everything."

"I know," I said sympathetically. "I get it. Just... take care of yourself. Please."

She nodded, though sunk further into the couch as she laced her hands around my arm to get comfortable, almost like she was ending the conversation without saying so. I took the hint and looked back to the screen.

"Picked a film yet?" I asked.

"Almost."

—

Despite how easy it was to fall back into everything with Skye, there were still topics we didn't discuss. Like we never brought up our friendship-ending argument again, or her time in rehab, and she never talked about the accident. It wasn't that I didn't leave that space open for her to discuss, but it was definitely her way of keeping that separate by not bringing it up. And naturally, I didn't want to force her to relive it by bringing it up either.

But not talking about it meant I didn't always know how to help her.

We were walking around a park near her apartment one evening, enjoying a stroll at first, but then we started to mess around on some of the playing equipment since the place was deserted.

"You really think you can clear it in ten seconds?" I asked her with a laugh as she looked up at the monkey bars.

"I do, yeah," she said, mirroring my laughter as she glanced at me. "You just watch. Go on. Grab your phone. Timer at the ready please."

Curious, I pulled out my phone and stepped back, finger hovering over the timer. "Ready when you are, idiot."

She grinned before standing beneath the monkey bars. Looking up at them, she took a deep breath, about to jump up, but I intentionally interrupted to throw her off.

"You sure you don't wanna stretch first?"

She jumped and glared at me playfully. "Shut up. Just get ready."

I laughed and waited patiently, watching as she readied herself once more. And then she jumped up to grab the bars and I started the timer.

She managed to move down three bars before faltering at the fourth one and then letting go all of a sudden. My eyes widened when she landed on the tarmac with a sharp gasp, and I forgot all about the stupid timer as I rushed to check on her.

"Shit, Skye, you okay?" I asked quickly, kneeling down beside her.

Her face contorted in pain as her hand clutched her back. She was leaning on her elbow, clearly hurt.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," she muttered quickly, though she winced and her eyes were squeezing shut to suppress the pain.

I noticed she was holding her back – not really putting together that it was from her existing back pain from the accident – and tried to help by reaching for her jacket to see if she'd hurt it from the fall.

"No!" she suddenly shouted when she saw me attempting to touch her, and I jumped.

"Okay, sorry, sorry," I apologised, not wanting to overwhelm or upset her anymore than she already was.

I moved my hand back, but she grabbed it and squeezed gently before I could, an attempt at an apology for her outburst. A shaky sigh escaped her lips as she breathed out the pain, and I didn't say anything more as I held her hand, waiting patiently. Though my heart was clenching with concern the longer she took.

"It hurts sometimes," she finally spoke, avoiding my eyes, "from the accident. That's all."

When I realised it was much more than just falling from the monkey bars, I felt stupid and spoke without thinking. "Do you have medicine?"

She tensed her jaw as she glanced at me.

"Stupid question, sorry," I realised, grimacing.

She let go of my hand and shook her head, expression softening. "No, it wasn't."

Something was bothering her, more than the pain, but now wasn't the time to ask, so I settled on helping her stand up.

"Maybe we should call it a night," I said carefully. "It's getting late anyway."

She nodded, still avoiding my eyes, and we both walked back to her apartment in an awkward silence. A million things were running through my mind, mostly out of concern for Skye, and acknowledging my utter stupidity. For once, I couldn't read her.

When we reached the lobby inside, we paused by the lift.

"Are you okay?" I asked, trying to dial down my worry for her sake.

"Yes, sorry," she muttered.

"It's fine," I assured her, eyes scanning her expression as she purposely looked at my shirt and not me. "I didn't mean to overstep before. Sorry if I made you uncomfortable."

She shook her head, eyes flickering to mine briefly, sad, before looking down to her shoes. "You didn't. I just–"

She paused, a moment too long, enough to make me wonder what had her so uneasy.

"It's not pretty," she finally spoke, quieter than usual. "The... the scar. It's..."

"You don't need to explain," I said, when she didn't speak anymore, though my heart ached with concern, soon realising her uneasiness was embarrassment. An unnecessary embarrassment at that, as if I'd care about a scar when she was still here, alive.

I gave her a moment, hoping she'd say something more, but she didn't.

"Will you be okay?" I asked worriedly, not wanting to leave her tonight if her back was flaring up.

She nodded. "Yeah."

I nodded too, though was unsure how to say my goodbyes. Usually I'd go in for a hug, but she was already uncomfortable with me touching her before and the last thing I wanted was to do that again.

But then she finally looked up, eyes meeting mine gratefully, before she hugged me.

"Thanks for not thinking I'm weird," she mumbled into my shoulder, arms wrapped around them tightly.

I returned the hug gently. "I could never."

She didn't let go straight away and neither did I, not until she made the first move since clearly she needed this hug more than I did.

Finally, she pulled apart and offered me a small smile. "Goodnight, Y/N."

"Goodnight," I said, returning her smile, before reluctantly leaving her.

—

It was the first time we'd even come close to talking about the accident and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't worried. She wasn't opening up and I wondered if she felt like she couldn't. But maybe that incident was the key, because things changed soon after.

About a week later, I was fast asleep when I woke up to my phone vibrating on my bedside table. Confused, I cracked an eye open, wondering who could be calling in the middle of the night, but then the vibrating stopped. I considered if I cared that much, before deciding it could've been an emergency and checking who it was.

When I saw Skye's name, I woke up a little more, overcome with concern since she'd never called like this before. Immediately, I rang her back. It took two rings before she picked up.

"Hello?" she answered with confusion.

Still half asleep, I answered groggily, "Why are you confused? You just called me."

She sighed. "I did. Sorry. I cut it off when I realised."

She sounded different, her voice hoarse.

"What's wrong?" I asked, sitting up in bed and rubbing my eyes.

"Sorry, I just–" She tutted at herself. "It's late, Y/N, go back to sleep."

Even half conscious, I knew she wasn't okay. "Skye."

It went quiet, but she gave in, to my relief. "I had a bad dream," she admitted quietly. "I just wanted to distract myself. I didn't mean to wake you."

I frowned to myself. "Are you okay?"

A shaky sigh escaped her lips. "I will be. Really, just go to sleep, I'll be fine."

"I can't sleep knowing you're by yourself," I told her, too tired to hide my worry.

She paused, and then her voice came out guiltily, "Sorry."

"Don't apologise," I said gently, before asking, "Do you want me to come over?"

"No," she answered quickly, before adding, "It's late. I don't want you up and about this late into the night."

I was already pulling my duvet off and sitting at the edge of my bed as I said, "It's not a problem, Skye." It went quiet on her end, so I prompted, "Skye?"

"You don't mind?" she asked hesitantly.

Realising she did in fact want me there, I tried to reassure her. "No, of course not. I can come now."

She practically held her breath. "I owe you."

"You don't."

Exhaling softly, she said, "I'll send a cab to get you. I'll cover the cost. I don't want you on public transport in New York when all the weirdos are out."

I cracked a small smile. "Okay, Skye, see you soon."

Sounding relieved, she said, "See you soon."

I yawned as I hung up, trying to move quickly but still trying to wake up and so unintentionally moving at snail speed. After packing a small bag, including a change of clothes and some toiletries, I pulled on my shoes and a jacket before leaving for Skye's.

The taxi ride wasn't long since the streets weren't busy, and I found myself at Skye's door in less than twenty minutes. As soon as I knocked, she opened up.

"Hey," I said with a tired smile, before hugging her in greeting. "How are you?"

She hugged me back and let me in, closing the door behind me. I noticed she was wearing her pyjamas, hair dishevelled and eyes a little red.

"Better now," she admitted, before frowning. "I'm sorry I woke you up. But I'm glad you're here."

"I'm glad you did," I told her, before leaving my bag by the kitchen counter. "So, what do you want to do?"

"You're tired," she noticed.

I waved a hand dismissively, trying to look more awake. "I can stay awake if you want, Skye."

She sighed, shaking her head, before wordlessly grabbing my hand and dragging me to her bedroom.

"Come on," she said as she climbed into her queen sized bed, so I got out of my shoes and jacket and followed suit, settling in beside her.

We laid on our backs, staring up at the ceiling in silence. I chewed on the inside of my cheek as I glanced at her, her expression dimly lit by the moonlight and lights shining through her blinds. She was weary, though attempting to hide it.

"Do you have bad dreams often?" I asked curiously.

She swallowed visibly. "Not as much as I used to, but... sometimes, yeah." She paused, as if stuck in an internal debate, before admitting, "It was about the accident."

At the mention of the accident, the air in the room felt charged with uncertainty, and Skye's jaw tensed slightly.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" I asked tenderly, and when she didn't reply, I quickly added, "Or you don't have to at all."

Her dark eyes flickered to mine, surprisingly calm. "It's okay. It's just– it's a lot. And when I'm alone, it's..."

"A lot," I finished for her.

She nodded, looking back up at the ceiling. "Yeah."

I found her hand between us, squeezing it gently in support.

"I remember how difficult it was after," she muttered. "That, and the withdrawals, and all of it – it was a lot. Being in the hospital... I had my mum, but it felt so lonely."

I frowned as she recalled the experience, hearing it for the first time from her lips. And then she looked over at me and I looked back, realising there were tears in her eyes.

"Why didn't you come?" she asked, voice cracking and eyes welling up. "I wanted you to visit so bad. I– I thought you would."

Not expecting that, I struggled to speak. "I told you, Skye, I thought you wouldn't want me there. I..."

She let go of my hand and wiped her eyes shamefully, looking away. I sat up slightly, leaning on my elbow to look down at her, not wanting her to bottle everything up now.

"I waited," she whispered. "Every day, hoping you'd come to see me."

My heart crumbled at her words, guilt pressing down on my chest. "I'm sorry."

She squeezed her eyes shut. "It's not your fault, I know that. But I just..."

With the nightmare still fresh and her recollection of the past at the forefront of her mind, I knew her emotions were heightened and she was overwhelmed, and it hurt to witness.

I pulled her into my chest for a hug, rubbing her back gently. "I wish I had. I wanted nothing more than to see you then, Skye, truly. But I'm here now. I promise."

She didn't say anything, but she didn't pull away either. Her sniffles were heard in the silence of the room and she kept a firm grip on my tee shirt, and I didn't know what else to do other than continue to rub her back soothingly.

At some point, we must have dosed off like that because when I opened my eyes next, it was morning. I yawned as I rubbed my face, confused to where I was at first. And then I recognised Skye's room and it all came back to me.

I looked beside me, seeing Skye fast asleep, face smushed against her pillow adorably. She looked a lot better than she did last night and I was glad for it, seriously worried about her. Hopefully she'd gotten some sleep after everything.

Trying not to stare too long, reminding myself that it wasn't very platonic of me, I looked away and carefully clambered out of her bed to freshen up. After doing so, I went into her kitchen to find something to eat.

I was eating from a bowl of cereal at her kitchen island when I heard footsteps, looking up to see her leaving her bedroom.

"Good morning," I greeted. "How are you feeling?"

She hummed tiredly, yawning and running a hand through her dishevelled hair. I couldn't help but smile at how cute she looked.

"Better," she finally spoke, brown eyes meeting mine across the counter. "Thanks, Y/N. For coming last night."

I shrugged. "It's okay."

She sighed, shaking her head, and looked down thoughtfully. After a moment, she said, "I know I haven't talked to you much about it all."

My expression softened. "I don't expect you to."

"I know," she said quietly, before meeting my gaze. "I want to. I do. Otherwise the way I am, how I act... it doesn't make sense and I don't want you to feel confused or think I'm insane or–"

"Hey," I cut her off, furrowing my brows. "I don't think that, Skye."

She chewed her lip momentarily, eyes flickering to the counter top. "I want you to know. Eventually. I just– it'll be bit by bit because I can't go through it all at once. It's too much."

I frowned sympathetically. "That's alright. You can tell me as little or as much as you want, whenever you want. Meanwhile, if you just want the support, I can give you that too. It's what friends do."

She smiled a little, nodding. "Right."

I studied her expression, unsure what to make of it. "Did you get any sleep? Last night?"

She nodded, looking up. "I did, yeah. Thanks for coming. I know it was late. And I'm sorry for breaking down on you."

I gave her a knowing look, offering a small smile. "You need to stop apologising."

She exhaled. "Sorry."

I rolled my eyes playfully. "Never mind that. You want breakfast? I can make whatever you want, providing you have it of course."

She smiled as she took a seat. "That would be nice, yeah. Eggs couldn't hurt."

"Eggs it is then," I said, eating the last bite of my cereal before standing up. "Give me five minutes.”

She nodded and watched me, relaxed for even the smallest of moments, enough to put me at ease too.

[rkvriki]

romantic moments with them - a playlist

omg ana was seen posting??? sorry for not posting but i've been so caught in my studies and i really needed to focus. also enhas comeback??!

make sure to leave feedback ! my requests are open and so is my tlak box so let's talk !

WARNINGS ! none really i think?? warn me if theres any!!

a/n: i got carried away in some of the members so sorry if theres longer one and shorter ones i jutsvfdhfef

word count: 1.8k

LEE HEESEUNG ! - bills by enhypen

enhypen’s new album had just come out and the showcase was now happening and you were watching it backstage through the monitors watching and supporting heeseung. you watched as danced and sang so passionately and your heart felt full watching him do the things he had always loved doing even before you met him in high school. you felt so proud watching as he and his group grew so much and how far they’ve become. it made you look back at the shy heeseung from a few years ago and see how much he changed, for better obviously, into a carefree person. heeseung was a very hard worker and you had to always remind him not to overwork himself and sometimes you worried he wouldn’t listen to you since you couldn’t be with him at all times. you know he had gone through a lot during his training days and you tried to make sure he didn’t have to go through the same thing now that he had debuted. the performance had just ended and you were waiting for your boyfriend to come backstage. the door finally opened revealing all of the boys sweaty from all their hard work. heeseung ran to you and pulled you up, spinning you in the air as he smothered your face with kisses. he put you down and you stared into each other's eyes like two fools in love, making you both laugh. heeseung cupped your cheeks and pulled you into a sweet and awaited kiss.

rest under the cut !

PARK JONGSEONG ! - die for you by joji 

it was late at night and you and jay were out for a day night. you were just strolling around the city which was almost empty since it was almost midnight and the weather was pretty gloomy. even though it was dark you could still see clouds covering the sky. the walk was pretty silent, you were holding each other's hands, swinging hands back and forth. there was a comfortable silence in the air, the only sound came from people walking by or from the people talking in the esplanades around you. times like this made you feel like you were in a movie where you and jay were the main characters and only you and him mattered. times like these were rare for you and you were always afraid you couldn’t enjoy them to the max, so you tried make the most of them no matter the circumstances. suddenly it started raining, anyone's first instinct would be finding a place to cover themselves, but you two just stood still in the middle of the street, feeling the droplets wet your skin. you looked at each other as the rain got heavier and just laughed. jay pulled you into his arms as you both let out loud chuckles and spun around without a care in the world, enjoying yourselves in the rain. jay pulled you closer, his breath mixing with yours as you leaned closer until your lips connected in a deep kiss.

SIM JAEYUN ! - yukon (interlude) by joji 

you and jake were spending a lazy day indoors, deciding to spend his free day at your apartment and doing things at home. having a full day with jake was a very rare thing to happen lately since he has a especially busy schedule for comeback season so you would only see each other very late at night, only having time for dinner together and him having to leave right after eating since he had to wake up extra early for practices and whatnot. so last night he came over to your apartment to enjoy the silence and privacy you two couldn’t have in the dorms. you were both laid out on your couch as a shitty movie you picked on purpose played on your tv. you both would let out occasional chuckles at awful scenes that would play in the movie. a especially bad scene played and you both started laughing so hard you had to clutch your stomach. words tried to get out of your mouth but none came since you were laughing so hard. you noticed jake’s eyes on you, and you looked at him as your chuckles died down “what?” you asked him, still letting out small giggles. “nothing” he answered “i love you.” he said “oh, why so out of the blue?” you asked, letting out a chuckle as you held his hand. he just shrugged and leaned in to kiss you, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss, making you smile into the kiss.

PARK SUNGHOON ! - self control by frank ocean

it was one of those rare evenings where sunghoon would appear at your house unannounced and you two would just hang out and sometimes have dinner before he went back to the dorms. this happened often since he never knew when he could or could not visit you, obviously you didn’t mind it, seeing him so unexpectedly always made you so happy and your heart felt so full knowing that he thinks of visiting you at the most random times. dark orange rays were peaking through your blinds since the sun was starting to set. the smell of food could be smelt in the living room as you cooked some food for both of you and some tunes were heard quietly in the kitchen, probably sunghoon putting some music on the speaker you had on the living room. you put the stove on the lowest heat and walked to where sunghoon was, sat on the couch scrolling through his phone. the melody from frank ocean’s self control was playing quietly, the song filling the area. you grabbed sunghoon’s hand and pulled him in a hug, making him chuckle at him but hug you back anyway. he kissed the top of your head and you both started swinging to the rhythm of the song. sunghoon hugged you tighter and you did the same, listening to the sound of his steady heartbeat along with the song that played.

KIM SUNOO ! - kiss me by dpr live

dating sunoo sometimes felt like a dream. he always made sure to plan the best days for you two, always trying to make the best out of them since you were always a little restricted as you tried to protect and hide your relationship from the public. he made sure to always prepare everything in advance and also made sure you were up for what he had planned or f you wanted to change anything. you had experienced so many things with him. from getting up at 3:30 am to get ready and watch the sunset in a place 40 minutes away from the city to camping with him in the middle of a mountain he convinced you was safe. today sunoo decided to be a little more cliché and he planned an outdoor date near the hand river, late at night where you could be alone, enjoying each other's presence. you were both laid in the picnic blanket as you looked at the stars and tried to make out the different constellations. “i literally can’t tell any of them apart.” you said looking at him.  sunoo turned to look at you and opened his mouth to say something but he decided to stay quiet and just stare at you. he propped up on his elbows as he observed each of your feature, making you blush under his gaze. he leaned down closer to your face, but only left a peck on the corner of your mouth, teasing you. you started whining at him, making him laugh at your reaction.

YANG JUNGWON ! - jasmine by dpr live

concerts were something you found yourself enjoying a lot ever since you went to your first one. it felt so good to be in a space where so many people shared the same taste and you just loved the energy of people singing along to any songs that played. usually you go with your friends, but lately you’ve been asking jungwon to go on one with you since your friends sometimes bring their partners along and you also wanted to experience that. still he needed to remind you he couldn’t just attend a concert as he pleased but that din’t make you give up. yours and jungwons favorite artist was gonna have this concert in seoul, so obviously you wouldn’t miss it for the world and you literally begged won for days to come along which he ended up giving in. you both were in high places in the venue, since those were always less booked and you could be a little more private. the concert started and you both couldn’t contain your joy as you sang along. then a song that you both consider you guys’ song started playing. jungwon pulled you to his side as his arms embraced you and you started swinging along to the song, you back against his chest. you rested your head against his shoulder as you looked up at him. he looked down at you and pulled down both of your masks as he leaned down to kiss you, not caring if anyone even saw, it felt surreal to him.

NISHIMURA RIKI ! - understand by keshi 

niki had invited you to come watch him dance in the studio at the hybe building. visits like this happened often, since he loved having your presence as he danced, saying, in his words, “you were his muse”. you also didn’t mind watching him, your chest always swells with pride and you watch as he gets better and better each time you, which you thought was impossible since he is already perfect in your eyes. niki has a tendency to be hard on himself, which ends up with you comforting him each time he gets angry at himself for thinking he is not good enough. it makes your heart break knowing he can’t see himself through your eyes, you wish he could see how flawless he looks in your eyes. you watched as niki danced, feeling the loud bass from the music vibrating in your chest. you loved when he could turn a simple studio into a huge stage and he owned it all. the song came to an end and niki did a playful bow as you clapped happily at him. other songs from his playlist started playing and understand by keshi played through. niki extended his hand to you “would you give me the honor to have this dance, m’lady?” you laughed at his choice of words but took his hand. he started swaying you through the studio, turning and twisting you, stopping as he put a hand on your back and swung you down. you stared in his eyes laughing at his playful gesture and placed a peck on his lips making him smile at you.

[merrybloomwrites]

I Hear Them Calling (Chapter 7)

Story Summary: Alpha Harry Styles and omega Y/N Y/L/N meet under less than ideal circumstances. Overtime their paths will cross and they will be drawn to one another in ways they never expected.

Chapter Summary: Y/N deals with going off her medications and being apart from Harry. They finally reconnect to spend the holidays together.

Previous Chapters: Prologue ; Chapter 1 ; Chapter 2 ; Chapter 3 ; Chapter 4 ; Chapter 5 ; Chapter 6

Word Count: 6k

CW: smut

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The first week without suppressants and soothers isn’t awful. There's just enough of the medication still in your system to keep you feeling somewhat normal. Plus, your nest, really your entire apartment, is still holding on to Harry’s scent.

You continue to sacrifice sleep so you can watch live streams of Harry’s shows. You’re pleasantly surprised to see “Canyon Moon” back on the set list. You can’t help but wonder if it has anything to do with you telling him that it’s your favorite song.

Those first days lull you into a false sense of security. Maybe letting your omega out, living as nature intended, won’t be the worst thing.

But after that first week, things start to take a turn. Your system is definitely cleared of the meds now. And Harry’s scent has faded from your nest and apartment. You sleep restlessly Tuesday night, and Wednesday morning is rough. Not only are the touch deprivation symptoms coming back, but now you’re exhausted on top of it. Part of you wants to open another bag of scented items that Harry gave you so you can fix your nest. But that would be silly since you’re traveling home this afternoon to be with your family for Thanksgiving.

Instead, you decide to pack one of those bags with you, so you have his scent if needed. You realize that you likely won’t, since being around your family tends to soothe your omega. While packs don’t really exist anymore there’s still an inherent connection to family members that simulates the connection of packmates.

Your cousins know you're an omega, and though no one ever explicitly talks about it, they take care of you in little ways. They subtly check on you, or they’ll create a makeshift nest of blankets so that you all can cuddle together during movie nights. Even though they’re betas, their presence, and their obvious love for you has always helped keep you balanced.

Plus, your oldest cousin now has two pups, one a toddler and one only a few months old. No one complains when you baby hog them, knowing that holding a pup is also very soothing for an omega.

Reenergized at the thought of seeing your family, you’re able to get out of bed and finish packing, making sure to include one unopened bag of Harry’s scented items just in case.

After finishing the last two projects you’re doing for work, you start the hour-long drive home. When you arrive, you’re greeted by your parents, aunt, uncle, and one of your cousins. They’ll all be staying at the house, while your other two out of town cousins, along with their spouses and the kids, rented an Airbnb nearby.

You and your cousin Kelly will be sharing your room. It’s not the first time, since you’re an only child and she’s the youngest of three so you were often put together during family trips. She’s a couple years younger, in her final year of college, but the two of you have always been close. She’s also a huge Harry Styles fan and you kind of can’t wait to spill the beans about your relationship with him.

It’s a chaotic afternoon as you all work on preparing the house to host everyone for the next few days. Everyone comes over for pizza dinner and it’s wonderful to be surrounded by so many people. There’s music playing, conversations flowing, and constant laughter. You sit and color with your cousin’s son and get some baby cuddles with her daughter. It’s a perfect night and takes your mind off your problems for the moment.

That night, you and Kelly are getting ready for bed when your phone buzzes. You quickly turn to grab it but she’s faster. You see the screen for a second and there’s definitely a text from Harry.

He’s saved in your phone as just “Harry”, so she doesn’t know exactly who you’re talking to, as evidenced by her immediately asking “Ooooh who’s Harry?”

“I’m going to tell you, but you cannot freak out, or tell anyone else yet, okay?” you reply.

She nods yes with a comically serious look on her face.

“Harry is Harry Styles.”

For a moment there is silence as she stares at you blankly. You’re startled when she suddenly shouts “WHAT?”

You jump before quickly shushing her, as you don’t want either of your parents to find out what you’re talking about.

“If you promise to stay quiet, I’ll tell you the whole story,” you state.

Kelly quickly sits down and mimes locking her lips shut, showing that she intends to listen. You sit on the bed across from her and dive in, starting from the first concert of his you went to, all the way until his visit last week. She listens intently, eyes wide in disbelief.

“So. Harry Styles is your boyfriend? And your alpha?” She says, and you nod to confirm. It sends butterflies through your belly, hearing someone else refer to Harry in that way. It’s been such a well-kept secret since the first interaction and it’s so nice to have someone close to you know all the details. It almost makes it more real somehow.

After answering all of Kelly’s questions she gets up to finish getting ready for bed. You pull up your phone to answer Harry’s text from earlier. He was reaching out to check on you and wish you a good night, and it warms your heart to know you’re on his mind even countries apart.

You sleep well that night and wake up feeling refreshed on Thanksgiving morning. After a quick breakfast and cup of tea you get down to business to help your mom prepare for dinner. The rest of your family arrives in the early afternoon and the party is soon in full swing.

The next morning is slow and lazy, everyone just hanging out and watching movies together. You all enjoy the Thanksgiving leftovers throughout the day, and by mid-afternoon you’ve brought out a few different games to play together. You’re feeling great, though you do with you could have your alpha by your side. That would make it truly perfect.

That night you and Kelly lay in bed watching a livestream of Harry’s show. The next morning everyone packs up to travel back home, including you.

Your apartment now feels extra lonely, so you quickly shower before building a new nest using the items Harry gave you. Since he doesn’t have a show, you Facetime for hours that afternoon. You tell him all about your visit home and fills you in on how his time in Mexico was.

You discuss when you can see each other again, a conversation which should make you happy, but instead becomes a bit stressful. While you want nothing more than to join Harry on tour, there’s still up to three weeks until your passport is definitely going to arrive. You’d never left the country before, never had plans to, and so you never really thought about getting one. If you could go back in time, you’d slap past you or being so unprepared.

“Christmas is more than three weeks away,” Harry says. “Would you consider coming to England for the holidays?”

“Like, with your family?” you inquire.

“I’d like for you to meet them,” he replies. “It’s going to be low-key this year. Just mum, Gemma, and Michal.”

“Okay. Yea, that sounds fun!” It does. Totally fun. Only fun. Not stressful at all to meet the family so soon.

“Do you think it’ll be a problem with your parents?”

“They’ve always wanted to spend the holidays on a vacation to South Carolina. Maybe I’ll make that my gift to them and then everyone will be happy,” you answer. It’s something you’ve wanted to do for them for years anyway and you finally have more than enough money in savings to make it happen.

“That sounds really nice,” he says. “How long do you think you can come for? I’d love to have you here for Christmas and New Years if possible.”

“I could do that. The next couple weeks will be busy at work, but it calms way down by Christmas. I’ll obviously have to work a bit while I’m there, but it shouldn’t be too bad.”

“Fantastic! I’ll get a potential itinerary over to you and you can let me know if it needs any changes.”

You talk a little longer before hanging up to go to sleep. You’re feeling better now knowing that you have plans to see him, even if you are disappointed that it’s still a month away.

And what an awful month it turns out to be. Harry does everything he can to be helpful, but there’s just not much he can do for touch deprivation from a distance. You talk on the phone as much as possible and the scented clothes he sent you are a true lifesaver. But every day becomes a struggle. The constant itch causes you to scratch your skin raw, no number of blankets can get you warm, and you’ve had to cut way down on exercise since it always leaves you dizzy.

You’re so exhausted that packing is a nearly full day chore, but the knowledge that you’ll see Harry in less than 48 hours is enough to motivate you to finish the task. You’re taking the red eye and landing in the morning the day before Christmas. Harry informed you a few days prior that he’ll be in London for a meeting when you land, and that Gemma will be picking you up. You’re disappointed that you won’t see him right away, but he promised he’ll be there in time for dinner.

Your normal travel anxiety is ten times worse than usual, partially due to it being your first international flight and partially due to the lack of suppressants and soothers that you’d relied on for years. Harry had insisted on purchasing you a first-class ticket, which you fought him on, saying it was unnecessary. But now that you’ve finished boarding, you’re grateful. You’re already overstimulated from being around so many people in the airport and it’s nice to have so much space during the flight.

You try to get some rest but for some reason you just cannot fall asleep. Instead, you listen to the podcasts you downloaded while curled up, face tucked into Harry’s sweater that you saved just for this trip.

The moment you land you get a text from Gemma that she’s on her way and will be there in half an hour, giving you time to collect your luggage and get to the pickup area. You’re too tired to be nervous about meeting your boyfriend’s sister for the first time, which is a true blessing at this moment.

You’re only waiting outside for a minute before you see her pull up. She hops out of the car to greet you with a hug and help you get your suitcase into the trunk.

She makes conversation throughout the drive, but can tell you’re exhausted and says, “Mums got some breakfast waiting at home and Harry’s room is ready for you, so you can get a nap before he gets back.”

She pulls up to the house a moment later and quickly grabs your bag before leading you inside.

“Mum!” she calls out as she opens the door. Moments later, Anne steps into the entryway and pulls you in for a hug, saying, “It’s so nice to finally meet you! Harry cannot stop talking about you.” You smile and blush at that and reply, “It’s nice to meet you as well. Thank you for having me.”

“Of course! We couldn’t be more excited that you’re joining us for the holidays! Now come, you must be starving.”

She leads you into the kitchen and the three of you sit together and have a late breakfast. They do most of the talking, which you appreciate.

After you’re done eating you try to clean up, but Anne stops you saying, “Leave everything, please, you’re our guest. You must be tired; Gemma can bring you up to Harry’s room so you can rest a bit.”

“That would be great, thank you so much,” you reply.

Gemma leads you upstairs, pointing out the bathroom before leading you to Harry’s bedroom. You’re immediately hit with his scent, so potent that for a second you think he must be there with you.

You quickly scan the room, taking in the decorations and all his books and belongings. It’s like a shrine of Harry, and you want to examine everything, but you’re truly exhausted. As soon as Gemma steps out you start getting ready for a nap. There’s a pile of clothes on the bed, a t-shirt and some pajama pants. They’re doused in Harry’s scent and without even thinking, you change into them.

The room starts to spin around you, and you immediately get into bed. The world goes black the second your head hits the pillow. 

Nearly two hours later Harry arrives home. He’s earlier than expected thanks to his afternoon meeting getting cancelled. You’re unaware of his return, still knocked out in his bed.

“Hi Mum, hey Gemma,” he says, walking into the living room where the two of them are watching a movie together.

“Harry! We didn’t expect you for quite a while, dear,” Anne replies.

“Last meeting was cancelled, apparently there’s a storm up north so half the team couldn’t make it. They’ll reschedule after the holidays. Is Y/N here?” As much as he enjoys talking with his family, he hasn’t seen you in over a month and doesn’t want to spend another minute away from you.

“Yea, she’s taking a nap in your room,” Gemma replies.

Harry sniffs the air before saying, “Hm, that’s odd,” and sniffing the air again.

“What is?”

“I can’t catch her scent.”

“She probably wore some strong scent blockers for the flight,” Anne reassures him, picking up on his shift from excited to worried.

“Probably,” he replies, but he’s not sold on that explanation. “I’m just gonna go up and check on her.”

He turns and heads upstairs, stopping in the bathroom quickly to wash his hands and splash some water on his face, before changing into a clean outfit he’d left in there earlier. He knows you’ve likely been bombarded with other scents during your travels and wants to make sure no strangers scents cling to him.

Once he’s sure he smells only of himself, he crosses the hall. He knocks on the door gently but enters slowly when he gets no reply. At first he thinks you’re sleeping. You look asleep, curled up in his blankets. But you don’t seem at rest.

Your breathing is rapid, not deep and even like it would be if you’re asleep. And he can hear the faint whimpers that indicate you’re distressed. He stands there for a moment, shocked at the state he found you in, but another whine from you kicks him into action.

He turns out of the room, shouting for Gemma to come upstairs. She runs up, hearing the edge of panic in her little brother’s voice.

“How long has Y/N been up here?” he asks, needing as much information as he can get.

“Maybe two hours. Why? What’s going on?”

“Did she seem like, upset at all? Or spacey or dizzy? Did she seem off in any way?”

“Not that I noticed. She was just really tired. Harry, what is it?”

“I think she dropped,” he replies.

It’s quiet for a moment before Gemma says, “You said she had to go off her medications right? And she’s been without her alpha for a month, so she has some intense touch deprivation. Plus, she’s exhausted from traveling to another country. Being in your space, which probably reeks of your scent, might have put her omega over the edge.”

Harry nods along, knowing his sister is probably right.

“I should’ve been with her. Gemma, I have no idea what type of drop this is! Maybe it’s a good one because she’s in my space, but she seems distressed.”

“Harry, take a breath. You know what you need to do right now. So calm down and be there for your omega. Would you feel better if mum and I left? Gave you guys some privacy?”

“I don’t want to kick you guys out.”

“Of course not. We have some last-minute shopping to do. We were just waiting until you came home. Go, take care of your girl. We’ll see you later. And call if you need anything, okay?”

“Okay. Thank you Gems,” he replies. Gemma walks downstairs and Harry takes a minute to calm himself. He knows that he needs his emotions in check to be able to help you. Just as he’s confident that his feelings won’t negatively affect you he hears the front door close, indicating that the two of you are now alone in the house.

He walks into the room and finds that you haven’t moved. He first crouches by the bed, leaning close in hopes that you’ll notice he’s there and he won’t startle you. There’s no change so he starts to emit calming pheromones. This seems to catch your attention, and Harry watches as you subconsciously seek him out.

Now that you seem to know that your alpha is there, he climbs into the bed with you. He does so slowly, watching your reaction the whole time. He gently shifts you to hold you against his chest and angles your face so that your nose is against his scent gland. He continues to let out the calming pheromones which seem to be working, as you’ve stopped whimpering.

Harry gives you some time to stay under, but he’s fairly sure this is a bad drop, so he starts to bring you out sooner than later.

“It’s time to come up, omega,” he says. “Can you come back to me? I’d really like to see you. Been waiting so long.”

It doesn’t work right away, but after a few minutes of Harry talking to you, the haze of the drop starts to fade. Finally, your eyes blink open and meet his.

“There you are,” he says, his voice relieved.

“Alpha?” you say, still dazed and confused. Your body feels heavy, and you don’t recognize your surroundings. Everything feels strange, but you know that you’re okay, now that your alpha is there.

“I’m here, omega. I’ve got you.” You’re immediately soothed by his presence, and by his words. Your brain finally clicks on, and you fully realize that you’re in Harry’s room, in his arms. You begin to shift, Harry reaching out to make sure you’re steady. He realizes what you’re trying to do and moves as well until you’re situated in a way that you can both scent each other at the same time.

You sigh as his nose brushes against your scent glad before doing the same to him. It isn’t long before your scents mix together to fill the room.

“Are you alright, love?” Harry asks.

“I’m good, now that you’re here,” you truthfully reply, blushing at your vulnerable statement.

“I’ve missed you, so much,” he says before moving to kiss you. His lips move lazily against yours, and you have to swallow back a whine at the feeling of him against you.

After a couple minutes he pulls back and says, “Mum and Gemma are out. What would you like to do next? Do you want to sleep a little more, or eat, or take a shower?”

You think about it for a moment and reply, “Can we take a bath?”

“We? Together?” he questions.

You blush and say, “I definitely want to wash all the travel grime off me, but I kind of don’t want to leave your side. It’s that’s okay with you.”

“It’s more than okay with me, as long as you’re comfortable.”

“I am,” you say with a shy smile.

You both get out of bed, and Harry collects towels and clean clothes for both of you. He then fills the tub, pulling his shirt off so he can test the water without his sleeve getting wet. Your heart starts to race as you realize that you’re both about to see each other naked for the first time. For some reason you’re grateful that it’s in this setting, rather than a sexual one. It lessens the nerves, knowing that there’s no expectations here.

He slides off his pants, leaving him in boxer briefs. You do the same, then throw your shirt off as well before you can overthink too much. You weren’t wearing a bra, meaning your chest is now exposed to Harry. He takes a deep breath before saying, “You’re beautiful.”

Harry quickly shuts the water off and turns back to you. “We can stay like this if you’d like? Keep our underpants on?”

You shake your head no and your hands go to the waistband of your panties.

“Together?” you ask.

“Together,” he replies, and follows your lead, slowly lowering his underwear until you’re both standing there, completely bare. You fight off the urge to cover your body and hear Harry quietly say, “Absolutely perfect.” This compliment gives you the courage to look up, and your eyes quickly scan over him, briefly stopping at his groin. Your breath stutters as you take in his impressive size, and his smirks when he notices.

“C’mon,” he says. “Let’s get in before the water cools.”

He has you get in first, keeping you steady so you don’t slip. He slides in behind you and gently pulls you, so your back is resting against his chest. You feel his groin brush your skin, and tense for a moment before relaxing. You’re surprisingly comfortable with the whole situation.

You both stay like that, silently relaxing and enjoying each other’s company. Eventually, Harry says, “Scooch forward, let me wash your hair.”

He does so, first shampooing, then putting in conditioner, being extremely gentle as he does so. He then grabs a shower puff and spreads some body wash on it, before giving you a look asking if it’s okay for him to clean your body. You nod yes, and he focuses on rubbing the soap over your limbs and torso. He makes a mental note of the scratch marks on your skin, and frowns at how bad your touch deprivation must have been to cause this. He hesitates with his hand resting on your thigh. You open your legs slightly, silently giving him permission to clean between them as well. A gasp escapes your mouth at the feeling, but it only lasts a moment before he’s done and moving away.

Harry quickly washes himself as well, and by the time you’re both soap free, the water has become uncomfortably cool. He gets out and dries off first before helping you again and wrapping you in a fluffy towel.

Once you’re dry you both get dressed and head downstairs to watch a movie together. That’s how Anne and Gemma find you when they arrive home an hour later.

After talking for a few minutes Harry checks the time and gets up, saying, “I should really get started on dinner.”

“Want any help?” Anne asks but he quickly shakes his head and says, “I’ve got it, you girls relax.”

You last five, maybe ten minutes before you’re making an excuse to join Harry in the kitchen.

“Hey, you,” he says when you walk into the room. “Miss me?” he asks jokingly.

You chuckle awkwardly, not wanting to admit that he’s right. It feels clingy, but you’re still shaking off the drop, and the touch deprivation, and being away from Harry is physically painful. He picks up on this and immediately stops what he’s doing to focus on you. He pulls you in for a hug and whispers, “I missed you too.”

You stay in the kitchen with him, helping chop veggies for the stir fry. As soon as it’s ready the four of you sit together at the table. The food is delicious, because of course Harry’s a good cook on top of his other talents. After dinner is done and cleaned up you’re all back at the table with mugs of tea.

Though it’s not exactly late, you find it hard to keep your eyes open. Harry immediately senses how sleepy you are, and the two of you say a quick goodnight to Anne and Gemma before heading upstairs. You brush your teeth side-by-side in the bathroom, feeling very domestic. He hands you some of his clothes to wear to bed.

“I did pack my own clothes you know,” you say while changing into the ones he gave you.

“I know, but you just look so cute in mine,” he replies, his eyes soft as he looks at you in a pair of his pajama pants and an oversized sweater.

The two of you get into bed and Harry opens his arms for you. After getting comfortable together you quickly fall into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.

Christmas eve, Christmas, and Boxing Day pass with lots of gifts exchanged, movies watched, games played, and meals shared. The rest of the week is both exciting and relaxing. You do a little work each morning before going on an adventure with Harry and then ending the day with a movie.

It’s wonderful getting to know Harry’s family and see where he grew up. People recognize him when you’re out in public, but it’s not like it would be in any big city. He’s not being swarmed by fans, but rather greeted by his neighbors who are excited to see him home for the holidays.

The two of you get invited to a New Years Eve party in London, and after debating for a bit you both decide to go, planning to leave early so you can ring in the New Year just the two of you.

You drive to the city early that day to settle into his home there and go out for a late lunch. His house is beautiful, and you’re stunned by how well decorated it is. You tell him this and can see the way he lights up with pride at your compliments. Somehow he doesn’t get spotted while you’re walking around London, so you guys get to enjoy an uninterrupted meal and a walk where he points out some of his favorite spots.

He senses you getting cold and immediately routes back to his house. You both shower and get ready for the party, dressing up more than you ever have together. You put on a sparkly green, long sleeve dress that falls to mid-thigh. This gets paired with your black heeled boots, opting for some comfort and protection in the footwear department. 

He’s wearing a pair of black slacks, and a silver top, buttoned halfway. The two of you spend a moment just staring at each other, completely at a loss for words. Harry’s first to regain his senses, saying, “You look absolutely stunning, omega.”

“Thank you alpha. You look very handsome,” you reply.

He walks closer, until his hands wrap around your waist, and he pulls you flush against him. You gasp at the sudden move, and he leans down to kiss you, his tongue slipping through your parted lips. For a few minutes you get lost in the feeling of him moving against you. Slick starts to leak into your panties, and the groan Harry let’s out tells you he can smell it. His hips roll harder against you for another moment before he pulls back. Both of you take deeps breaths, and you note how blown his pupils are.

You turn to walk back into the bedroom and Harry asks, “Where are you going?”

“I’ve gotta change my underwear,” you reply.

“Do you have to?”

“Yes, Harry,” you say through a laugh. “I can’t go to a party smelling like slick!”

“Sarah’s going to be the only other alpha there, I’m sure she won’t be bothered.”

“Harry, behave!”

“No promises on that.”

You roll your eyes playfully before walking away to clean yourself up. By the time you get back Harry has his coat on and is holding yours.

There’s still a hint of arousal in his scent and he says, “Are you sure we have to go? We could just stay here, get out of these clothes…” he trails off suggestively.

“Yes, we have to go. You already committed. We don’t, however, have to stay. So let’s go so we can make an appearance and then get back here and see what we can do about getting out of these clothes.”

Harry smiles at the confirmation that you’re on the same page as him. He helps you slip on your coat and the two of you leave the house.

Luckily the party is in his neighborhood so the two of you walk there. You’re greeted by Harry’s friends when you arrive, and immediately start to catch up with Mitch and Sarah. Harry never leaves your side, his arm always wrapped protectively around your waist. Some people may see this as a possessive alpha move, but to you it means safety and comfort.

You stay at the party for a couple hours before ducking out around 11PM. Harry continues to hold you close the whole walk back, and the air is definitely charged with a new tension. His scent has shifted slightly, a hint of spice added to his normal warm smells.

Once in the house you both calmly remove your coats and shoes, neither of you making the first move just yet. It’s like you want the tension to grow until you can’t stand it anymore. You take some initiative and walk upstairs to the bedroom with Harry following behind.

He finally breaks when you arrive in the bedroom, and he turns you to face him before crashing his lips to yours. You can’t hold back the whine of pleasure, and if the way he groans and tightens his grip on you is any indication, he’s a fan of the noise you make.

His hands start to move down your sides until they reach the bare skin of your legs. He starts to slide them back up, now going under your skirt as he moves to press kisses to your neck. You loop your arms over his shoulders and tilt your head to give him more room. Your skirt bunches as his hands make their way to the sides of your torso. In a show of strength, he lifts you up and lays you on the bed.

He crawls over you, and you reach up to unbutton the rest of his shirt and push it off. It’s your turn to slide your hands over his sides, loving the feeling of the smooth skin beneath your fingers. Harry places more kisses to your neck before moving down until he’s placing a kiss between your covered breasts.

You feel the slick coating your center, knowing your panties are absolutely ruined. Both of your scents are growing stronger, his becoming spicier while yours turns sweeter. It mixes together deliciously, and you could grow addicted to the smell.

“Can I take this off?” Harry asks, gripping the bottom of your dress in his hands.

“Yes,” you reply as you sit up slightly so he can pull it off of you. His breathing stops as most of your body is bared in front of him. His hand drifts towards your chest and he looks at you with a silent question. You nod, giving him permission to touch you. He doesn’t hesitate, and you moan as his large hands cup your breasts before his thumbs move across your nipples. You never knew just a simple touch could feel so good, but his hands are like magic.

He spends minutes focusing on your chest, first with his hands, then his mouth. You’re already a panting mess beneath him. When he pulls away your hands go to his waistband, fingertips sliding under just a tiny, teasing amount. Harry gets the message and quickly removes his pants, socks, and underwear. Your mouth waters at the sight in front of you.

He gets back on the bed and slides his hands to the last article of clothing covering your body. “Off, please” you say before he can even ask, getting tired of waiting and wanting nothing more than him inside of you.

“Fuck,” he curses under his breath as he pulls the material down and off your legs. The smell of your slick becomes more potent, and you swear you hear Harry literally grown as he breaths it in. He moves back up your body and his lips find yours in a needy kiss. His fingers find your entrance and you keen as one slowly pushes inside. You continue to make out and opens you up to ensure you’re ready for him. At the same time, you reach out to grab his hard cock, gently pumping a few times.

Harry pulls away and reaches into the bedside table drawer to pull out a condom. As he’s pulling it on you have a moment of nerves. You’re not a virgin, but it’s been a while. And you’ve never been with an alpha before, and you can see by looking at him that there’s definitely truth about alphas being gifted in the size department.

Sending your new hesitance, Harry says, “Hey, you ok?” You nod, but he doesn’t fully believe you, so he adds, “We don’t have to do this right now. We can stop, or keep doing what we were doing, we don’t need to go all the way.”

“I want to,” you answer. “I want this. I want you. I’ve just never been knotted, and I’m not sure I’m ready for that.”

He nods, expression serious, and says, “We can have sex without me knotting you. Is that what you’d like?”

“I’d like that. But will you feel, you know, satisfied?” The last thing you want is to get pleasure if he’s not getting to feel it with you.

“Trust me, I will be more than satisfied.”

“Okay.”

“Okay? Want to continue?”

“I do,” you confirm with a smile.

He leans down to press a gentle kiss to your lips. It’s soft, and sweet, a noticeable difference to the intense kisses from earlier. And it works to get rid of the last of your nerves. His hand moves back to your entrance, collecting some of the slick gathered there and coating his cock with it.

Harry continues to kiss you as he lines up and slowly presses inside of you. Once he’s fully inside he pulls back to look at you. Your eyes meet and there’s a moment of connection unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. Not only does your body feel full, but your heart does as well.

“Alpha,” you say breathlessly.

“My perfect omega,” he replies.

After giving you a moment to adjust to his size he starts to move. The thrusts are slow at first, but he picks up pace. He grabs your leg to wrap around his hip, and the change in angle has you seeing starts.

It only takes a few minutes before you feel the familiar tingle in your core, and a press of his fingers to your clit send you over the edge. He works you through your orgasm and then pulls out. He removes the condom and wraps his hand around his cock. It only takes a few strokes before his knot expands and he comes, his release coating your chest and belly.

Harry gets up and grabs a towel to clean both of you off. You both get under the covers, and he pulls you to lay on his chest. He checks the clock and sees that it is two minutes past midnight.

“Happy new year, omega,” he says.

“Happy new year, alpha,” you reply as you drift off to sleep, comforted by his arms and the smell of your combined scents.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Thank you so much for reading! Probably wrapping up this story in a couple of chapters, so let me know if there's anything you might want to see!

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[mauvecherie-writes]

Cupid’s Kisses.

pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Black f!reader.

tags: 18+ nsfw, minors dni, super fluff, cheesy in parts, an overdose of corny, smut, mention of birth control, unprotected sex, choking, hard breeding kink, gagging, minor spanking, dirty talk, creampie, aftercare.

word count: 6.6K.

note: Welcome to my first fic of 2023! So so sorry it took so long to come but life got in the way. Things are a little rusty but either way please leave feedback and your thoughts! Reblog and like! Thank you 💕. NOT EDITED.

tip jar.

Since your years in university, Valentine’s Day was one of the celebrated holidays that you hated purely from a resentful standpoint and you weren’t ashamed to admit that yourself. Every time that you had tried to celebrate with a partner, it never ended well for you one way or another - from being dumped on the day to your partners just not having any type of enthusiasm for Valentine’s. “I mean I love you everyday, one day shouldn’t change that.” You hated hearing that - it was such a lame excuse used to justify not wanting to go through the efforts to plan anything special. It made you feel like shit to be honest and after a while you began hating the day. The only way that you really celebrated for the past three years was exchanging gifts with your friends and then coming back home, watching romantic movies and indulging in all of your favourite foods and wine.

However, you did not expect the whirlwind persona that was Lewis Hamilton - the absolute charmer swept you off your feet and they haven’t touched the ground since. It had been a blissful seven months since a chance encounter at the French Grand Prix. You had been a guest of the Mercedes Petronas team and when he laid his eyes on you in his side of the garage he just knew (he said) and since, you were never out of his presence.

Weary at giving the high profile man a chance, you did not regret agreeing to a date with him. Giving him the opportunity to win a chance at your heart had not gone wrong thus far and as the days went by, you knew that you could not walk away from him without heartbreak. He made you feel a deep love and ultimately it made you realise that Lewis was the person for you.

This year, Valentine’s Day was going to be different and you knew this when you were greeted with a box of your favourite artisan chocolate that spelt the question ‘Will you be my Valentine?’ as you woke up on the first day of the month. Of course you enthusiastically agreed to the question, jumping into his arms and spending that morning making out and sharing the chocolate.

For the first time in years you felt butterflies in your stomach and you were unable to shake them off the more your relationship with him grew. Today was Valentine’s Day and you didn’t feel utter despair and dread when you woke up and got out of bed. Unfortunately, ever the busy man, you weren’t able to wake up in Lewis’s arms. He had flown you out to Monaco to his beautiful beachfront apartment, fed you and made sweet love to you until the both of you passed out. This morning, he needed to do some last minute business stuff before he was able to shut himself away and just be with you.

After washing your face and brushing your teeth, you walked out of the bedroom and you gasped as the open floor living and kitchen area came into your view. Red and pink rose petals were scattered all over the floor from the corridor you were standing in to the kitchen island where a few varied sized boxes resided along with love heart balloons and a bouquet of your favourite flowers. In the front of a large, circular black box was a pink envelope with your name elegantly written on it. For what felt like hours, you just stood there, simply in awe of the effort Lewis had put in for you. In the earlier stages of your relationship, you had confessed about your hang ups with Valentine’s Day so the fact that he was going to such lengths to change your perspective of the day was greatly appreciated.

You hadn’t realised that you had been softly crying until your best friend had picked up your facetime call and that was the first thing that she noticed.

“Bitch! Why are you crying?! What did he do! I’ll fly over there and beat his short ass right now!”

You laughed through your tears, shaking your head. “Nothing bad, I promise.” You sniffed as you tried to wipe your tears away. “Ugh I don’t even know why I’m crying but look at what I woke up to.” You flipped to the back camera and panned to the view that was ahead of you.

“Oh my god!” Ariel gasped as she took in the decorations. “That’s so fucking cute!” She gushed.

“I know! And there’s an envelope with my name on it but I haven’t opened it yet. I was too overwhelmed and just called you.”

“Do you want to open and read it together?” She asked and you nodded your head as she could see you. You then propped your phone and sat on one of the bar stools at the island. You took a deep breath, wiping away your tears before grabbing the envelope and softly opening it. You ignored the slight trembling of your fingers and pulled out the letter.

Princess …

Every moment that I have spent with you since I saw you in the garage had been an awakening, an awakening as to how I could have gone years without you in my life. You bring me such an unfathomable joy that I didn’t even know I was missing and I want you to know that and I will let you know that everyday for as long as you let me.

Inside this box are forever roses to represent each day since we’ve met how grateful I am that you’re taking this chance at cupid with me. I hope that you don’t regret making that choice as much as I don’t regret following my heart in chasing after you.

You are worth it my dear Valentine …

Yours,

Lewis xxx

The tears were now freely streaming down your face after you had finished reading the letter. You even heard Ariel sniffing as well.

“Holy fuck, that was the most romantic thing I have ever heard. Who knew short stuff had that in him.” Ariel commented as she watched you cradle the letter into your chest. Your heart was beating so fast as another wave of emotions crashed against your ribcage. Lewis, near or far, had the ability to rock your equilibrium, leaving you unbalanced and flustered.

“I can’t deny it anymore.” You whispered just loudly enough for her to hear through the phone.

“Are you going to tell him?” Ariel asked.

Before you could answer, the apartment door opened and along with his footsteps, Roscoe’s loud barks echoed and filled the space. You quickly tried to dry your tear soaked face but you knew that you couldn’t hide the redness and puffiness of your face.

“Baby I’m home!” Lewis yelled, his voice carrying through to the kitchen.

“In the kitchen.” You yelled back, willing your voice to not crack. Roscoe rushed as fast as he could to your feet as Lewis came around the bend and came into your view with the brightest smile on his face. However, the smile slowly dropped away from his gorgeous features as he took in the state that you were in.

“What’s wrong?” He asked as he drew closer to you.

“I read your letter.” You replied as your bottom lip quivered as his words rang through your mind. “That was the sweetest thing anyone has ever written to me.”

“Awe Princess, come here.” He cooed as he cupped your puffy cheeks in his warm hands. You leaned into his palm as he wiped your tears away with the pad of his thumb and placed assuring kisses on your skin after. “I meant every word.”

“I know.” You whispered as you smiled at him. Lewis smiled down at you before he placed his lips on yours. You leaned into the kiss, letting your body be swayed. He wedged his hard body in between your legs, letting the fabric of your robe slip away from your thighs. As the kiss deepened further, your hands grabbed onto his waist as you stabilised yourself.

“Alright now. As much as I love both of you and think that this moment is cute, you’re making me feel like I’m intruding on something I shouldn’t be looking at right now.” Ariel loudly announced, causing the two of you to break apart. You groaned in slight embarrassment and hid your face in Lewis’s chest. His laugh shook his body and vibrated through you.

“Hi Ariel.” He greeted her as you hugged him, melting into his embrace. His scent was soothing and the sound of his steady heartbeat calmed your unregulated feelings at the moment. You sat in silence as the two briefly interacted before Ariel bid her goodbyes. You waved at her before Lewis hung up the call. You sighed contently as you focused on the feel of his skin beneath your fingertips.

Lewis dropped his hands to the sides of your thighs and caressed them. “How are you feeling Princess?”

“I’m feeling happy.” You smiled, still rubbing your face into his chest. You felt the pressure of his kiss on the top of your head.

“And those were all happy tears?” He questioned as he began to rock your body from side to side.

“Mhm. Thank you for the letter and gifts.” You lifted your head to meet his eyes. You blushed as he smiled, the creases of his cheeks almost touching his eyes.

“You’re very welcome.” Lewis bent his neck and captured your lips into a slow and passionate kiss once again.

“Are you ready for the rest of the day with me?” He mumbled against your mouth.

“I am!”

“Good, because I intend on making sure that today becomes the first of many.”

“Oh really?” Your eyebrow quirked upward as a smile threatened to spread across your face.

“Yes really and you better be ready for it all.”

Your heart seemed to have capsized in your chest as were at a loss for words. Truthfully the words were the tip of your tongue but you couldn’t say them just yet. Instead, you chose to kiss him, hoping that he could understand that the fervour of your movement conveyed the words you couldn’t say …

There was never a dull moment during the day with Lewis and your favourite pup. You had spent most of it in Monte Carlo, enjoying the beautiful sun and waves the location offered. Lewis at one point had tried to teach you how to surf but you were not having it. Your cornrows were relatively new and you were not about to let the salt water ruin them more than they had already been ruined after you had accepted to ride on the jet ski with Lewis. His inability to be slow on any vehicle led to you being splashed by the water as you screamed and he laughed at your dismay. After that you decided you rest on the private sunbed, reading a book with the occasional glance at Lewis playing fetch with Roscoe.

When evening came, the dog sitter came to collect Roscoe at the last minute after Lewis had decided you would spend the rest of the day in the Monte Carlo region on a whim. Luckily for you, you had grabbed his gifts and hidden them in your day bag. With his status and wealth, Lewis was somehow able to manoeuvre a last minute booking of the Venus Lover’s suite at the Fairmont Hotel and when you arrived at the suite, your belongings that you needed for the night were already there. You shared a shower together but then prepared for dinner separately and you were happy about that considering that you wanted the second part of your gift to be a complete surprise.

You embellished in a black backless maxi dress that hugged your figure and almost exposed the crack of your ass but somehow due to the bunched up fabric on your ass, it didn’t. Due to the high neckline of the dress, you barely accessorised sticking to large golden hoops and a bold statement bangle to match. With one last puff of your signature perfume - you were ready.

“Baby! Are you ready?” Lewis asked from the bathroom, where he had been getting ready.

“Yeah!” You excitedly exclaimed. You dug your first gift out of your bag and waited for him to approach you in the sitting area. He was fixing his cufflinks and had yet to lift his head and look up at you as he walked into the space. Finally, he looked up and the familiar look of adoration that always adorned his face when he looked at you drew on his features.

“Aren’t you the most beautiful woman to ever grace the earth.” He complimented as he walked towards you. With a roll of your eyes, you tried to hide your blush.

“Are you always this corny?” You enquired. “Or is it just something about this day that brings it out of you?”

“I like to think of myself as a poet.” He shrugged his shoulders confidently as you rolled your eyes yet again.

“I have something for you.” He looked down at your hands and saw the velvet box being trapped in the grip of your fingers. “As you know, this particular holiday hasn’t been the best for me for some years now to the point that I hated it.” You started and you could already feel your emotion climbing up your throat.

“But here you come, barging your way into my life and breaking through all of my walls and making me feel things that I haven't felt in a very long time.”

“Angel..�� He said as he picked up on the quiver in your voice as you spoke but you shushed him.

“No. Let me say this now before I lose my nerve.” You mumbled.

“Okay.”

You took a deep breath before you continued with the small speech that you had planned out in your head. “Seeing so much of the effort you’ve put into making this day be worth it for me has shown me how you truly care for me. I feel so wanted, adored and most importantly, you make me feel so, so loved.” Your voice lost volume towards the end as you tried to control your emotions and stop yourself from ruining your makeup with your tears.

“I didn’t know what I could get a man who could have the world at his feet but I hope the fact that I put a lot of thought into this counts.” When you stopped talking and met his eyes, they were unshed tears lingering in his but the spark never dwindled. He took the box from your hands and opened it.

“Princess, this is … wow.”

“The necklace is encrusted with lab grown diamonds and the bracelet with a matching pinky ring are made from old gold jewellery I did not want anymore. Turns out that it’s cheaper to smelt old gold making it into something new than buying something else outright.”

“That was so thoughtful of you.” He softly murmured as he placed the gift down and took you into his arms, securing them around your waist. In your heels, you towered over him and a part of you secretly loved that in situations like this, you looked down at him but his eyes were so captivating, it was hard for you to shift your gaze anywhere else but his eyes.

“Thank you for the gift, I’m probably never going to take them off.” You giggled, fixing the lapels of his suit then shifting your ever moving fingers to his shirt. He had opted out of wearing a tie and let his chains hang low on his exposed chest.

“Good, so that everyone knows that you’re mine.” You spoke softly and inched down to peck his lips.

“Oh you’re claiming me now?” He smirked as his hands moved down to your ass, pulling you into him. You felt his hardening cock on your thigh and a part of you wanted to say fuck it to dinner plans and stay in the room but you had put too much effort into getting ready and there was no way you were going to let it go waste.

“You knew what the deal was.” You giggled before giving him one more kiss. “Now let’s get out of here before I change my mind on dinner.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Lewis decided to wear the pinky ring and bracelet despite the fact that it clashed with the silver jewellery he was already wearing. The table in the hotel restaurant was in the VIP section but it did not stop people from reaching for their phones to sneak a picture. It had been a while since Lewis had stepped out publicly with a woman but you had the discussion prior to this and you were prepared.

Dinner was still as intimate as it could be in the open space. You were sitting side by side instead of across from each other because you loved looking so closely into his eyes as you spoke. You loved the sound of his voice so close to your ears and with the way that you were feeling now, being right by his side was the better option.

“I had forgotten to mention that I wrote something on the inside of the ring and bracelet.” You said as you played with his fingers as you waited for dessert. Lewis’s eyebrows curiously quirked upward before he pulled his hand away to take the jewellery off. He was silent for a beat as his eyes squinted to look at the small engravings.

“Yours, YN and yours as you are mine.” He read out loud with a bright smile on his face and you could feel your cheeks rise as you grinned in response to his joy. He put the jewellery back on and leaned forward to capture your lips in a soft kiss. Your hand came to his cheek as you dove in, tasting the addicting sweetness of him - letting the sensations take over and slowly losing yourself. His moans were soft and barely audible but you cherished them all the same.

A clearing of the throat broke you from your love spell.

“Sorry.” You apologised as you cleaned Lewis’s lips of any reminiscent of your gloss.

“It’s not a problem, It is the day of love after all.” Your server replied with a cheery tone. You dropped your head onto Lewis’s shoulder as he announced Dessert. There was a range of sorbets and fruit before a specific plate of vanilla cheesecake was placed in front of you. At first you were confused but then you gasped as you registered the worlds that decorated the plate.

“When did you do this?” You asked Lewis as you looked at him.

“When you went to the bathroom.” He softly laughed. “I think now is an appropriate time to ask you officially.”

You didn’t hesitate to exclaim an enthusiastic yes before pecking his lips multiple times. It wasn’t a must that he asked you to be his girlfriend. The boundaries of your relationship had been established around Christmas but as your friends had always drilled into your head, nothing is ever truly official until clear titles are put in place, that way no one else can question it.

Lost within yourselves, the server quietly left the both of you. This man made your heart burst out of your chest with just how happy he made you and it was sickening because the lingering doubt threatened to ruin your joy.

What if it is all too good to be true?

You did not even want to think of a possibility that Lewis was faking any of this - call yourself delusional, crazy or whatever but you were going to stay in this moment with him and maybe come back to reality some time later.

Right now you were completely content with what you had.

“How do you feel about the coming season?” You asked him as the both of you fell back into your conversation. He had been sharing with you his anxieties about the new car for the upcoming Formula One season.

“You’d think with how long I’ve been doing this, I wouldn’t be getting nervous. But the last couple of years, I won’t lie to you and say that they didn’t fuck with my mind a little bit. There’s a certain confidence you tend to get with the experience I’ve got behind me but 2021 and 2022 really shook that up. It was like everything I had done up to that point didn’t really matter because the governing body could just say fuck that shit and create their own champion.”

His candidness left you awestruck. He had made the decision to stop talking about what happened in Abu Dhabi for his peace and well being but you could tell even with the work that he had put into moving on, what happened on that night and in the coming year affected him a lot. By then, you had been an avid supporter but that night really shifted you to become an even bigger supporter than you already were. The way that he had handled himself with such grace and humility for people who didn’t deserve it was commendable.

You caressed his hand that was on your lap. “I still think you should have lost your shit on them.” Your comment caused him to snort out a short laugh. “Like I know how it would have looked in front of cameras, but at least backstage. I was so angry for you! I still am by the way. You may have been able to move on but I hold a mean ass grudge.”

“Let’s hope you never bump into the FIA then.” He teased.

“I’m gonna be at every race that I can, they won’t hear the end of it if shit goes down like they did last time.”

“Oh yeah? What are you gonna do?” He raised his eyebrow, smirking softly - seeing you getting worked up amused him. To him, the situation was past him and hated looking back at it but it was always good to know that people close to him, especially you, were able to voice all the things he couldn’t say without it being a whole separate issue.

“I’m YN fucking LN, I’ll create Dante’s inferno on earth for everybody.”

“Okay YN fucking LN.” His soft laugh lightly shook your body. “Thank you for having my back.”

“Well, we’re a package deal now. You do the racing, I do the hating.”

The restaurant slowly began to empty but the night was still young and there was still so much energy to burn. The champagne the both of you had been sipping on was burning through your veins as you rushed back to your suite, excited to be getting back to privacy, away from prying eyes, ears and cameras.

Once you were back in your room, you threw your shoes off and opened the fridge to pull the bottle of wine out. You grabbed your phone and set your R&B playlist before pouring the alcohol into a glass.

“Baby do you want a glass?” You asked but didn’t get a response. “Lew?”

You straightened up and turned to face him but he was just staring right at you as he played with the black tie he had abandoned to wear for dinner.

“You okay?”

“Come ‘ere.” The sudden shift in his mood and tone almost startled you but not too much. The tension had been lurking all day like a bad habit. A lustful cloud followed you everywhere and it was finally going to pour. You walked to him and stopped right in front of him with your glass of wine still in your hand. He took the glass away from your hand, taking a sip from it before placing the glass down on the table.

You exhaled a small breath as he silently placed his hand on your neck and tipped your head to the side.

“What’s your safe word?” Lewis murmured into the side of your neck as he placed kisses on your skin.

“Cherry.” You whispered as your eyes fluttered shut as you enjoyed his lips travelling along your skin. His other hand came to your back and pulled on the strings of your dress. The material fell from your body and pooled at your feet. He dropped his hand from his neck as a harsh breath left him.

“You were naked beneath the dress the entire time?” He asked as his eyes hungrily drank in your body. You shifted on your feet beneath his heated gaze.

“Underwear would have ruined the outfit.” You justified it as his hands came to your body once again. His fingers traced from your collarbone to your heaving chest. He outlined your nipple before softly pinching it eliciting a soft moan from you.

“I haven’t been inside you all day.” His lips followed the trail of his fingers, kissing, sucking and nibbling on your flesh as you stood leaning into his touch. You could feel yourself throb with anticipation as he teased you. His words caused your body to ache as if signalling to you that you indeed missed the feel of him buried deep inside of you.

“Yes.” You gasped as he abruptly lifted you into his arms. You secured yourself tightly onto him, your heat pressed against his shirt.

“We’re about to change that.” You tugged on his locks, freeing them from the hair tie and running your fingers through them. He got to the bed and laid you down with him hovering above you. He devoured your mouth as his hands moved down your body, gripping you tightly. Teeth clashed with tongue as the kiss grew heavier. You moaned into his mouth as he pressed his clothed hard cock on you.

“I love the sounds you make for me. So sweet.” He groaned as he took your hands and placed them above your head. You lifted your hips, trying to create some friction on your clit. Your soft panting made Lewis press even harder into you. “You just can’t help yourself can you? Humping me so desperately because you want me to fuck you.”

“Please, please.” You whimpered which caused him to chuckle. He bruised your lips with a rough kiss once more before he flipped you onto your stomach and parted your legs. You wiggled your hips as you patiently waited for him - you knew that he loved taking his time with you. He caressed the back of your thighs, kneading your ass and parting your cheeks.

“The prettiest pussy.” He said as he laid in between your legs and softly bit onto your thigh.

“You’re gonna eat it baby?” You asked him as you leaned back, feeling his beard on the inner part of your thigh.

“Yes pretty girl, I’m gonna eat your pussy and you’re going to cum all over my face.” Air faltered out of your lungs as he dragged his tongue down your slit and pulled your clit into his mouth. His hands pulled your cheeks further apart as he feasted on your pussy.

The sloppy sounds of Lewis eating your pussy mingled with your unfiltered moans. He groaned into your cunt and smacked your ass as he flicked his tongue even harder against your clit.

“Oh fuck!” You moaned louder when he introduced his fingers into your cunt, immediately pressing down onto your g-spot. You grabbed onto the headboard and began grinding on his face faster and faster. His satisfied groans vibrated through your body as he worked your body with his mouth and fingers.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck! I’m gonna cum baby, I’m gonna fucking cum!” You gasped as you moved your hips until your body trembled with your first orgasm of the night. He licked your pussy until you were trying to throw your body away from him. He chuckled as he finally moved his lips away from your body and watched you collapse into the mattress.

“I hope you’re not tapping out just yet Princess. I’m just getting started.” He said as he stripped his clothes away from his body, leaving him bare between your legs. He flipped you onto your back and took your hands into his and from the side, he pulled the tie and bound your hands together and raised them above your head. Securing them on the headboard, he moved away from your body to search for condoms.

“Wait!” You yelled which halted his actions and he looked at you.

“What’s wrong Angel?” He asked you as he approached the bed and sunk beside you. As bound as you were, you leaned your body closer to his and held his eye contact.

“I want you to fuck me raw.” You told him.

“Baby …”

“Please? I’m clean and I’ve been on birth control for the past three months. I want to feel you come inside of me. I need it, please baby. Can you give that to me?”

“Fuuucckkk.” Lewis moaned as he grabbed your throat and shoved you into the bed as he situated himself in between your legs once more. Your eyes slightly rolled to the back of your head as he restricted your airwaves and rubbed the tip of his cock against your opening.

“Are you sure you want that with me? Because once I have you this way, there’s no going back. I’m going to want to fuck you just like this every time.” He warned as he coated himself in your slick. It was true what he was saying but you loved this man more than anything and this was going to be the next step. During a conversation, you had made it known that you loved the feel of your partner filling you up but it took an immense amount of trust for you to get to this point. With Lewis, you were there and you wanted him completely.

“I’m sure. I’m so fucking sure, I need you.” With that he pushed his cock inside of you, slowly until you were filled to the brim. With your air passage restricted and Lewis slow stroking you, your eyes rolled to the back of your head as the pleasure quickly intensified.

“Fucking hell Princess. You feel so fucking good like this.” He growled as he snapped his hips forwards. “You’re so fucking wet.”

You spread your legs even further for him to accommodate his body. Your mouth fell open as you looked in between your bodies where you connected and watched his dick move in and out of you, covered in your cream. His breath hitched in his throat as he disappeared in your folds. He was slowly losing his senses but he held onto his control as he guided himself deeper into you.

He was so thick and stretched you to your limits and you were taking it all. You wanted to touch him as your arms ached to reach out for him but the tie was digging into your wrists. He held onto your waist as he rocked himself into you, the weight of his body almost crushing you but it felt too good having him thrust in and out of you over and over again.

Your moans rang out until he shoved his fingers into your mouth, gagging you as he fucked you harder until you couldn’t breath. Your chest was burning but the pleasure was too much and all consuming. He pulled his fingers out of your mouth and wrapped them around your neck once more as he pounded your cunt . The sound of your thighs slapping against each other with your wild moans echoed in the room.

Lewis leaned down and sucked your bottom lip into his mouth, slowing his pace and caressing your arms to soothe them from the ache from being stretched out. You whimpered into his mouth as he felt deeper this way as he rolled his hips.

“I love the way you handle me.” He whispered. You nodded your head in a daze as you could feel yourself tightening up causing him to groan into your jawline. He nibbled on your soft skin, kissing the bruising from his suckling on your neck earlier. He put his hand underneath your back, pulling you tighter against him which changed the angling of his thrusts which caused a gasp to leave you as he pushed against your spot. The tip of his cock hammered at it until you were trembling beneath him.

“Oh fuck, fuck fuck fuck!” You cussed as your eyes closed and your mouth parted. “Yes! Yes! Yes!”

“Come for me right fucking now.” He hissed against your cheek as he kept up with his momentum. He watched as you writhed beneath him, letting yourself go and soaking his dick and his thighs with your cream. “You look so beautiful when you come Princess. Do it again.”

He quickly untied your wrists and you wrapped them around his neck. He smacked the right side of your ass as his thrusts became more desperate. He tightly gripped your hips as he became more erratic and you could feel him swell inside of you.

His moans were getting louder with each thrust.

“Please come inside of me Lew.” You whispered as you looked up at him. His hand came to the back of your throat and pulled you in for a rough kiss, his grunts echoing into your mouth as the both of you got closer to the edge.

“Say it again.”

“Come inside of me! Please baby, fill me up. Wanna feel you please!”

“Fuck!” Lewis exclaimed before he dropped his face into the crook of your neck. “I’m gonna fill you up Princess. Gonna fuck my cum deep inside this pretty pussy.” He murmured as he kissed your shoulder. His word threw you over the edge as you clenched around him tighter and came yet again. Your orgasm triggering his own as his muscles tightened beneath your fingertips as he came deep inside of you. He held onto you as he twitched until he stopped coming.

Your soft breaths and caresses brought him out of his daze. Lewis lifted his head and kissed along your jawline until he captured your lips into a soft and slow kiss. He cupped your cheek with one hand and held his body up with his other as he watched you.

“How are you feeling beautiful?” He asked.

“Full.” Your answer caused him to chuckle before he slowly pulled out of you. You whimpered at the loss of him inside of you and clenched your muscles to keep his essence from dripping out.

“Stay right here.” He smacked your ass causing you to giggle. He walked to the bathroom, staying in there for a while as you closed your eyes to take in the moment. The intensity was different this time around - the both of you had crossed a line that you personally could not come back from.

You were his girlfriend now and that brought on a wave load of emotions that you weren’t able to deal with right now. You were happy and that’s all that mattered.

The bed dipped and you felt a warm cloth touch your thighs. He wiped you down, showering your body with kisses as he did so and after he was done, he grabbed a bottle of water and a fruit platter from the room fridge. Getting into the blankets, he wrapped his arm around you and you laid your head on his chest.

“You feeling okay baby?” He asked as he fed you grapes along with sips of water. You nodded your head as you looked up at him and pecked his lips.

“Today was amazing, thank you so much baby.” He cuddled you closer to his body and pecked your lips again.

“You deserve the world Princess and for as long as you want me, I’ll give it to you.” He murmured.

“You’re so fucking corny.” You mumbled which caused him to chuckle.

“But you love it.” He replied as he began to tickle you. You squealed as you tried moving your body away from him but he dragged you closer, continuing to tickle you anywhere that he could.

“Okay okay! I love it! Damn!” You yelled which caused him to stop.

“I have one more present for you.” Lewis said as he got out of the bed with his boxers hanging low on his hips. You bit onto your bottom lip as you watched his hips sway as he walked. His back was slightly red from your nails marking his skin making his back even more attractive to you. He bent down into his suitcase and grabbed onto a black velvet box.

He came back and sat on the bed beside you and placed the box on your chest. You sat up and took the box into your hand.

“What is it?”

“Just open it.”

And when you did, your eyes were greeted with a necklace with his initials as the pendant. The letters were encrusted with white diamonds along with the chain.

“I had gotten this as a way to show you that I truly mean it when I say I’m committed to you. I don’t take this relationship lightly and sometimes when I say stuff, it’ll come out as corny but I mean it, it’s how I feel about you. There’s no hiding with you YN, I’m proud to be your boyfriend.”

“Fuck.” You sniffed as tears began to line your eyes yet again. You placed the box on the side as you grabbed his face and captured his lips. You moaned into his mouth as his tongue slipped into yours.

“I love you.” You whispered in between the kiss.

“I love you too. So, so much.” He replied as he pulled away from you and laid his forehead against yours. You hugged him before you pulled him down with you onto the bed. He shifted his body underneath the duvet and in between your legs.

“We go together, like real bad.” You grinned as he pressed his hardening cock against the inner part of your thigh. Your body was becoming hot all over again as you pushed his boxers away from his hips.

“I like the sound of that.” He replied as he held onto your chin as he kissed you once more …

lewishamilton

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lewishamilton this Valentine’s Day I was blessed with a love beyond measure. Thank you for loving me the way you do Princess 💜.

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mercedesamgf1 💜💜💜

f1wags: what a lovely surprise! congratulations! 💕

teamlh44: this is the hardest launch I’ve ever seen 😭 so beautiful!

paddockwags: she’s so beautiful! So happy to see you happy champ!

hammertime44 that’s a gorgeous BLACK QUEEN with you champ! Happy Valentine’s 🙏🏾.

yourusername You are everything and more. I love you 💖.

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yourusername

liked by lewishamilton, arielboo, mercedesamgf1 and 98,546 others

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yourusername Your presence has changed my life in ways that I had deemed impossible. Grateful to be receiving your love and I will cherish it forever, my forever Valentine 🌹.

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mercgirl4463 oh you guys have claimed my heart 🥺.

ashawoforlh Lewis asking you to be his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day is the most Lewis thing ever.

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arielboo have I told you guys how much I love you and your love?

yourusername you do, almost everyday.

lewishamilton: I’m yours as you are mine 💜.

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@dhlfastestlap @queenshikongo3 @kindan3rdy951 @ricciardosheart @lewiscrown @sarah-ev @mercedesjpg @playgurlxoxo @scorpiobleue @leilaxalie @nomnombibblenibble @honey-prinxess @ohkapten @aisharmi @melodicheauxxo @chaneajoyyy @royallyprincesslilly @olyvoyl @fineanddandy @lewisthot @paradisehamilton @lh44adore @mimihopie

[writingsfromhome]

The Golden Years

A/N: really liked this song the first time I heard it and decided to write something based off of it!!

——————————————

5 years ago:

The halls were noisy with the rush of the bell; the day had ended and everyone was eager to get home on the spring Friday. I sit in the music room with my guitar, strumming softly trying to get the tune out of my head.

The music room had the familiar woody smell, I never really knew if that was from the furnishing or all the instruments but I never got tired of it.

The only other people here are Thomas who’s napping after skipping his last class and the music teacher who’s setting up the class for next week’s lesson. He liked me and by extension allowed me to linger in his class after school. And sometimes let my mates stay hidden from hall monitors.

I wave goodbye to him as he finishes up, wishing him a good weekend. He just misses y/n walking in.

Y/n y/l/n. She moved down the road from me a couple years ago and she was always fascinating to me. She’d made friends her first few months here and stuck with them—those same friends hated my friends for various reasons but they always gave me an excuse to interact with her albeit in an annoying way.

Y/n was known to win out the lead for any play our school has put on. She had an infectious energy and I’d spent every moment she caught my eye gazing at her—not that I’d admit it if anyone ever asked.

She spots me and smiles, I remember to smile back at the last minute, shocked that she was acknowledging me with one. We hadn’t been nice to each other in a while; the circles we ran in loved to hate each other.

“Hey Harry,” she walks up to a nearby desk and perches there. “Whatcha working on today?”

I try to compose myself, “hey. Y/n. Uh I’m just trying something out. Something new.”

“Can I hear it?” She asks, her eyes alight with a genuine interest. It catches me off guard again.

“Really?”

“Yeah! I asked didn’t I?!”

“It’s really rough.”

“That’s okay,” she shrugs. She makes herself more comfortable.

“Really rough I-“

“Please?”

With a bat of her eyes I’m putty. I take in a deep breath—here goes nothing. Or if anything this would just be one more thing her friends could make fun of me for. Maybe that’s why she was here.

I strum her what I’d been working on for the last hour and hum along. She listens intently, her expression shifting and opening up as the chords change. Being me and nervous, I end it on the wrong note and nearly poke my eye out with the neck, making an awkward save as I set it down on my lap.

She sits quietly after the production, back straight and gazing out the window with a relaxed smile.

“I know you said that’s rough but that was amazing.” She says to me. “You’re actually bloody talented Harry.”

“Aw uhm well thanks,” I mumble. My cheeks feel on fire. I rarely played for people like this. If they were around while I worked on pieces that was alright but I’ve never had an audience of one.

“No really! You have a gift how long you working on?”

“The day.”

“The day!” She shouts and her enthusiasm makes me laugh. I don’t know why she was being so nice to me but it fills me with a buzzing joy. “You have such a way with your music like each strum is a new part of a story. It’s good! I can imagine it in a movie.”

I blush harder, “Thanks I um…I really enjoy it. Sometimes it’s easier to express myself with this than with…with like a conversation?”

She nods in understanding, “Y’know you should share your music. Start a channel or something online and post stuff! Like covers—people love covers-“

“I don’t really like to sing.”

“But I bet you’re good at it too?”

“Uhm nah I’m-“

“Don’t get shy on me now!” She nudges me and I swear I feel it linger even after she moves her hand away. “You’re such a tough jerk in the halls when you’re picking on my friends don’t go soft now.”

I laugh until I’m doubled over, part overjoyed and part embarassed because it was true. I don’t know why I was suddenly being shy.

“I’ve got to warm up my vocal cords,” I touch my throat once I’m done laughing. She grins. “I can’t sing right now.”

“I’ll hear it one day. I’m holding you to it.” She points a finger at me. “You should be performing this stuff.”

The idea of performing outside the walls of the music room felt both exciting and daunting. But the earnestness in y/n’s eyes give me a sense of courage.

"Maybe," I shrug. "I've never really thought about it.”

"Well, maybe it's time you did," she suggests gently. "Don't let your talents stay hidden."

“Yeah,” I smile. “Makes sense coming from you.”

“What’s that mean?” She raises a brow.

“Our year wouldn’t be blessed with all your productions, you’ve got natural talent too.”

“Yeah well,” now it’s her time to blush. “I really enjoy it.”

“I know.” I say. She catches my eye and a tender fondness passes between us.

“Anyway, I promised Clara I would braid her hair before her football match so I’ve got to go. But…it was nice talking Harry.”

I watch her go and I can’t wipe the dopey smile off my face the rest of the weekend.

5 years later:

I didn’t think I would see her here. After all, she lived across the pond these days and had rsvp’d as a maybe.

But there she stands with the same group of friends that surrounded her even back then. They’re all a little older, grown into people their secondary selves could only imagine becoming. But even now, they’re faceless next to her; she commands all my attention.

She looks stunning in a simple blue bridesmaid dress and her hair grown down in waves. The wind lifts her hair and she looks as majestic as the first day my eyes landed on her. As radiant as every day I’d been with her afterwards. She was golden sunshine and every minute I got to spend with her had been golden too.

Four years since I last saw her. Those four years had gone by in the blink of an eye; it had been fun ‘til it hurt.

I feel a surge of emotions—longing, regret, and the tiniest speck of hope. They compete for dominance as I indulge studying her for a moment longer and just as I look away her head lifts, catching my gaze for the briefest second.

My heart races.

I turn and wander to where my mates pass a football around. Just like we used to. Some things never changed.

Some things did.

“You see her yet?” Thomas asks.

“D’you not see the look in his eye?” Abe, his twin brother, asks.

“Yeah I saw her,” I interrupt before they wheedle me for how I looked. I could imagine it, the regret and sorrow etched into my face. “It’s been four years I’ve already told you lot I’m over it.”

My friends glance at each other.

“I am.” I insist.

“The lady doth protest—ow!” Ramo rubs his chest where I’d tossed the football.

“Where’d this even come from?” I nod to the football.

They shrug, “Some kid had it. We stole it from him.”

I sigh and look around the space. One of our best mates from secondary was getting married to Hailey, one of Y/N’s mates. That’s why half of our class was here a short walk from where we all went to school.

The reception should have started a half hour ago but the couple were stuck in traffic. Apparently. So all the guests have been entertaining ourselves and that meant stealing footballs from children.

“What happened to that lady you were supposed to bring along?” Abe asks.

“Lady?” I ask.

“Yeah wasn’t she a few years older than you?”

I repress the urge to sigh, the same as when we were school boys these friends never stopped teasing each other. Of course I also did my fair share but the trick was to never let them know it cut too deep.

“We ended things a while ago,” I say as if it doesn’t poke at an old wound to say.

A while ago was two weeks ago when she found out my ex would be at the wedding and I had sent a text to the best man clarifying if she would be there. She had seen the message and gone batshit, talking about trust and about being emotionally closed off. It was hours of arguing into the night before she’d left home. We’d broken up the next day.

The old wound was feeling like I was never going to find love like I did with her. With Y/N. Every relationship I’d had since crashed and burned worse than a Nascar vehicle with faulty mechanics.

If I would've known those were the golden years, I would have done things so differently.

But for the last two weeks instead of pathetically staring at pictures with my ex and wondering if I should call her to make up, I was pathetically looking at the polaroids of Y/N and I that I kept in an old box. I wondered what happened to the ones she had, if they had gone up in flames or if they lived in a shoebox under her bed.

My attention’s snagged by the boys elbowing each other and glancing at me and then behind me. I turn just in time for y/n and a couple of her friends to walk up to us.

I try to play it cool but I don’t know how I look; probably like a deer in headlights, and y/n is the bright stark headlights.

But her eyes slide off of me and onto the group and it feels like I’ve become the deer after the headlights have blinked out of sight.

“If it isn’t the poor four,” one of y/n’s friend uses our nickname from school. “And who’s this?”

“Dinis,” Dinis puts the football down and extends his hand to Clara. We watch them flirt.

“Didn’t you know Dinis in college?” Abe asks.

“Clara moved away in college,” y/n says smiling at the interaction happening in front of us. “Obviously she hasn’t felt the Dinis-effect yet.”

Her friend and her laugh.

“Oi Y/N haven’t seen you in a minute how’s the Angel City?” Ramo asks.

“You mean the city of angels?” Y/n raises a brow and the group laughs again. I’m too mesmerized watching her talk, seeing her alive and in person in front of me to catch the joke in time so I smile along with the group. “It’s cool, always something to do. But I don’t actually live there anymore I moved out of the city last year. Get some breathing room.”

My heart skips a beat. “I heard the city’s as rammed as ours.”

I anticipate her attention, us locking eyes, something passing between. When our eyes do meet I feel a rush of familiarity and uncertainty.

And she simply glances like I’m just another bloke to her, nods, and the looks back at the group. “Yeah sometimes even worse if you can believe.”

Someone else asks another question but my head is filled with a loud buzz. Reality feels like it crushes me down as easy as an aluminum can; I was spared a glance. She spared me a glance. That’s all I was to her?

“Where d’you think the newlyweds are?” Clara asks.

“Traffic,” Abe rolls his eyes.

“Think fast,” Thomas suddenly shouts and the football is whizzing past me towards Clara. We watch in horror as it hits her with a thwack in the chest.

“What the fuck Thomas!” Clara holds her hands out as she stares at the dirt staining her blue dress. “What the-“

“That’ll come off,” Clara’s friends assure her. “It’s not mud don’t-“

“Here,” suddenly Denis is beside her and holding out his hand. “I’ll help you clean it off.”

“What the hell mate?” I look at Thomas. He’s flushed and looking scared. I’m too busy looking at him to notice Clara’s pitched the ball back at him and it hits him in the side of the head, knocking some sense back into him.

“Nice one.” Someone mutters.

“I’m sorry!” He finally finds his voice as Clara walks away with Dinis.

“You’ve got shite all over your hair,” Abe points out to his brother.

“I’m outta here before I’m next,” y/n’s other friends starts to back away to the group they were in previously.

“Where?!” Thomas starts rubbing it off which only spreads it further into gelled hair.

“Let’s go,” Abe hauls his brother away with an arm locked around his neck, tussling the dirt in his hair as they go.

“So…” Ramo looks between y/n and me, scratching the back of his head. “That was crazy. I should return this ball to…”

He trails off, walking away from the two of us. Which wouldn’t have been as awkward except he just left a cloud of awkward in his stead.

“Y/N,” I say softly like I was approaching a feral pup.

“Harry,” she replies, her tone polite yet distant, a subtle barrier between us.

“I don’t think they’ve changed much,” I act like I wasn’t aware of everything unspoken.

She smiles politely. “Nope. Just as boyish as the day we all met.”

“That wasn’t our proudest moment-“

“Yeah you boys thought you could beat us girls at British bulldog.”

“Little did we know,” I shake my head. We’d been badly beaten and battered by the girls’ team. We didn’t take to losing very well back then.

“If only we knew then what we know now.”

I look over at y/n; it felt like she was saying one thing but meant something else. Something that sounded close to reminiscing about us.

But with how she was acting it made me feel like I’d made us up. Was it never that serious for her?

“Wouldn’t have fucked up so much?” I ask.

“Yeah something like that,” her lips tip into a half smile. She still hasn’t looked me in the eye for more than a second. I missed those eyes. I missed the way they used to look at me.

“How’s the acting?” I ask. I wait for her to look at me, acknowledge me more than she did. Wait to see if alone together there would be more meaning in the looks we exchange but she stays facing forward.

“It’s slow right now. I haven’t been booking much this season which is why I was able to make it to this.”

“Sorry to hear that,” look at me I want to say instead.

She shrugs. “It happens. Slow seasons then you find yourself booked back to back and burnt out. Nature of the biz as they say.”

“Very LA.”

We go quiet and I feel my heart explode at the distance she was keeping; I can sense her guardedness.

"I've missed you," I confess quietly, unable to hold back the truth any longer. "I think about you often."

Her gaze softens, a fleeting vulnerability crossing her features before it hardens into something stonier.

"It’s been four years," she notes in an even voice. “Surely you’ve moved on Harry. Don’t try to flatter me now.”

I don’t think I had moved on, I think with a sinking heart. I hoped tonight would be a night of reconnecting and exploring if there was anything left of us in the future. But it seemed that y/n had made up her mind about what her future was going to be long before this.

“Oh look Clara’s back,” she spots her friend walking back towards us. Dinis is nowhere in sight but she’s splotchy and windswept.

“I’m going to literally kill that prick. I’ve got a wet spot on my front like I’m still bloody breastfeeding or something.”

“It’ll dry up,” y/n pats her friend’s dress. “It’s sunny out don’t worry.”

“It better by the time we do photos.”

It’s like I’m not even there. They continue talking and slowly turn to walk back to their other friends.

“Nice talk,” I call out.

Clara’s still too busy ranting but y/n glances at me. Her smile is a reflex as she waves, unengaged and apathetic.

I feel a jab in my chest, I don’t know what to think. The last four years I’ve been so afraid I’d let go of the best thing. That I’d never find a love like hers. Meanwhile she’s moved on so much that I wasn’t even an ex any longer. I was just someone she knew in grade school. That hurts. It feels like lava dripping over my chest.

“Y’alright?” Ramo reappears at my side. He looks genuinely concerned.

“Yeah!” I put on a smile I don’t even feel. “Just wondering when this party’s getting bloody started.”

I feel Ramo’s eyes on me as I walk towards another drink but he doesn’t say anything more.

***

I sit with my arm around Y/n and her head rests on my shoulder. Sometimes the quiet moments we existed in beat out the others. They fed my heart and heightened every sense of mine.

“I wrote something,” I whisper into her hair. She turns her head to look up at me and I gently pull away. “A song…for you.”

“For me?” Y/n’s eyes are alight with shock and something else. “You wrote a song for me?”

My heart pounds as I confirm with a nod. “I’m halfway done but I wanted you to hear it.”

“Well go on,” she sits up and angles herself towards me. “I want to hear it!”

I pull my guitar case closer to me and open the familiar snaps, pulling the instrument out and close to me with shaky hands. Y/N watches with an excited attentiveness.

I began the melody that started as a few chords in my head the first time Y/N and I kissed under this tree and has continued to build for the 4 weeks since. This tree felt like it witnessed so much of the 5 weeks we’ve officially been together and I wanted to write an ode to it as much as y/n.

I couldn’t believe it was only 5 weeks but after a summer and a whole semester of flirting and hanging out I’d finally asked her out at the end of January. It was now March and Y/n had gotten her acceptance letter from across the ocean. She had told me last week with nervous hands and I wanted her to know we would always have this thing between us no matter what decision she made.

Y/n smiles as I begin but her eyes grow misty as I finish my final lines I had so far.

"And under the cherry tree, where love and laughter will always be," I sing softly, my voice cracking with emotion. "I'll cherish all these memories, even when you're not beside me."

“Oh Har,” she tips forward and I catch her against my chest, her head buried in my neck. “I can’t imagine living so far from you. Leaving you and everyone behind.”

“It’s the adventure you’ve been waiting for,” I reassure her. “You’re gonna make it big.”

“I don’t know if it’s worth it,” she whispers.

I pry her away gentle so she can look me in the face. I want to selfishly tell her to stay and never leave me. But even more than that I want her to do what she has always been passionate about, what she loves to do.

Love.

I love her, I realize with a clarity that cut so deep it tumbles out of my mouth.

“I love you,” I say. She freezes in my arms and I fumble to continue. “And I want you to live the life you always imagined. You’re destined for amazing things y/n I know it. I’ll always be here.”

“Will you?”

“Of course,” I kiss her on her temple and ignore that she didn’t say it back. That I said it too soon damnit we’d only been dating a month. What was wrong with me?

“I think you need to share your talent with the world,” she reminds me.

“That’s why I joined the talent show with you.” It was y/n’s idea, a final hurrah before we graduate and to prove to myself that I could get over my performance anxiety.

“We’re gonna crush it.”

I nod, the lump in my throat grows too big for words. She seems to sense it like she always does and pulls me into her this time.

It would take her a week to whisper the three words back to me, in the darkened corner of a house party right before she leads me home. It was a long week but so worth it.

***

The next time I catch y/n alone is when I’m talking to Hailey who’s thanking me for the few words I gave for her now husband Michael. The husband in question was doing the Macarena and Hailey was the sort to never be caught dead doing that sort of thing.

That’s why the couple never made sense to either group of friends. Yet they were the ones with a ring on their finger this many years later.

“Hailey oh-“ y/n is tipsy, I can tell with the sheen to her eye and the permanent half-smile etched into her lips. “Sorry didn’t realize-“

“That’s alright!” Hailey wraps her arm around y/n. “This girl is the best. She literally hopped on a last minute flight to be here! Can you believe that? I was crushed when she said maybe but ugh she always swoops in last minute saves the day. That’s always been her, back in the day during one of our school dances right, I got caught with…”

Y/n and I lock eyes as the bride babbles on and there. Finally there. The passing look of two people who know what the other is thinking without a single word.

She seems to catch herself and after an intense few seconds and a small smile she composes her face into an unengaged one and jostles Hailey.

“Hailey Harry doesn’t care! I just wanted to get a photo with you and Mik-“

“He’s too bloody busy doing cringe dances-“

“He’s actually having a drink looking for you now but look at this.”

“What?” Hailey’s head swivels around the room as y/n presents her phone with the groom doing a very serious macarena.

“And they say gen z get all the cringe dances,” I comment. Y/n snorts and then covers her mouth, her laugh falling away into a composed expression.

“You know you don’t have to do that,” I say before I can think. A part of me was getting desperate and a little irritated and another felt heartbroken all over again.

“Do what?” She asks as Hailey prances away from us when she spots Michael.

“Be all serious and composed around me. If I’m funny just laugh. My ego could use a lift.”

She stares with a tight lip and cautious eyes.

“You used to laugh the most at my jokes,” I say a bit softer. “Made me feel like the funniest bloke in the room.”

Her eyes lose a bit of their edge but her mouth is still hard-set and a wrinkle forms between her brows. That was new.

“I-I’ve gotta go.” She says. “Gotta get the picture.”

“Right,” I shove my hands in my pockets and watch her go back to the married couple. Right before she reaches them she turns slightly. When she finds me still watching, she jerks back around.

Hope siphons into my chest.

***

“This is the best song!” Abe shouts in my ear as he and the remaining wedding guests belt out Sweet Caroline.

It was late into the wedding party. Much of the older invitees had gone home and kids with their footballs were probably tucked into bed. What remained were Hailey and Michael’s school friends and a few stragglers that were too drunk to want to go home.

“Final song,” the DJ announces. “Time of my Life.”

All night I had been stealing glances at y/n waiting to see if she would come to me. Reciprocate even an ounce of anything I felt. But she hadn’t. She’d gone out of her way to avoid me even when we’d bumped into each other outside the toilets. She’d simply brushed past with a mumble of something I couldn’t make out.

I think what I said to her made her angrier. The anger, and the cold shoulder was new. It makes me feel small.

But I’d had enough drinks by now to feel confident. Enough to walk to where she dances with some friends.

“Y/n.”

She startles and plays it off with a laugh. “What d’you want?”

I motion my head to the side. To talk.

Hesitation makes her eyes weary but she follows after a moment.

Everyone around us sings along to the song. The irony isn’t lost on me.

“What?” She asks.

I stare at her openly, she allows me as she searches my face herself. I grasp at something to start this off with but I’ve had a few drinks myself.

“I used to think you were completely out of my league,” what comes out is a random thought in the speech I’d built up in my head throughout the night.

Her nose wrinkles, “what are you on about Harry?”

“Don’t do that,” I clutch my shirt. “Don’t act like we’re strangers, like we didn’t have something together.”

Her smile falls away, “we had something…like four five years ago. That’s…that’s ages ago Harry. Tell me you’re not still hung up on it?”

Her voice cuts right through me but it’s her gaze that doesn’t quite look at me that gives her away.

“Look me in the eye and tell me I mean nothing to you now,” I cut through the bullshit. It might have been the realization that I’d stayed hung up on this woman for years, sabotaged my love life on the idea I’d find nothing like what we had. And she stood here in front of me now undermining what we had. Making me feel crazy.

She looks me in the eyes, the eyes that haunted me in my dreams.

“I…it was a long time ago Harry.”

“Then why’ve you been avoiding me all night?”

“I haven’t. We’re talking now?”

“So I’m nothing to you?” I ask, hearing the hurt and wishing I didn’t sound so desperate.

“Look. We were young and free and what we had back then doesn’t actually translate to much when you look back as adults.”

“Is that what you tell yourself? So you can freeze away your feelings for what we had?”

She gapes, then turns away with her arms wrapped around herself like the freezing caught up.

“I don’t know what you want.” She finally says.

“I just…” what did I want? “I want to know if you ever think about us. If you have any regrets…if…”

She sighs, “Of course you cross my mind from time to time. But I wouldn’t have regrets. I can see why someone would have regrets, however, after they just let someone they called the love of their life go. Especially when she needed him the most.”

There it was. Her hot anger.

“When you needed…”

“Yeah!” She barely glances at me. “I was scared of leaving and losing you and being alone and all the unknown things. And you left me. You just…said goodbye to us.”

Woah.

Her eyes prick with tears and she turns back to the dancing crowd. The song was winding down and the venue being cleared. I feel the opportunity pass through my fingers.

If I would have known, I would have held her longer. I would never have left her alone. Especially when she needed me the most.

“Y/n,” in a desperate move I grab for her arm and turn her back around. Her lashes are lined with tears, her mouth open in an “o” as she looks up at me. My eyes can’t help themselves as they flicker down to them. This was the closest I came to holding her like before. Her eyes do the same and I feel my heart racing in my chest.

“I’m sorry,” I croak. “For what it’s worth.”

“It’s not worth much,” she says through a watery smile. Trying not to cry; trying to stay composed.

“I’m still in l-“

“Stop,” she puts her hand on top of mind and gently nudges it off her arm. She shakes her head and her hair falls gently to cover her face. “I can’t do this right now Harry. I travelled all this way to celebrate our best friends. But the distance between us was for a reason.”

“It’s been years-“

“Doesn’t change how you left me after I gave you my whole heart. Or the fact that that we ended.”

“I truly an sorry,” I say to her retreating figure.

The shame I feel courses through my body; I couldn’t have known better back then. I was young and stupid and I didn’t realize these types of decisions weren’t to be made lightly. That their repercussions would echo for the rest of my life.

I left her under the cherry tree in the courtyard of the school we’d graduated from. It was late June and it haunted my memories since.

—

Under the skyward branches of the blushing cherry tree, a solemn silence hung in the air. It was the last day of our final year, and emotions swirled between us like the spring breeze.

Y/N stood with her back against the tree trunk, her yearbook clasped tightly to her chest, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over. I stood before her, my hands nervously clenched in my pockets, heart heavy with the weight of impending decision.

"I can't believe it's over," y/n murmured, her voice cracking with emotion as she meets my eyes. "Four years went by so fast."

I nod, unable to maintain eye contact. It wasn’t school ending that was making us this sad but what would come of us as I would attend school in the country and y/n out.

This decision weighed heavily on my mind ever since I learned y/n was attending ucla across the ocean—a decision she had made long before we acknowledged our feelings for each other. Now facing the idea of long-distance, I couldn’t shake the fear that everything was changing and things would be different in an unknowable way.

"Yeah," I manage to reply. My voice comes out hoarse, my throat tight with tears I was pushing down. “I'm going to miss this... miss us I…”

Her lower lip trembles, emotions ripple across her features. “Harry god I’m gonna miss us, you…just getting to be together everyday!”

I scrub at my eyes, not wanting to cry right now. She notices and wipes them for me. “You've been my rock through everything this last year."

I take a step towards her, closer. She was the sun and I wanted to bask in her glow, always. Except today wasn’t a bright day, my heart breaks at the sight of the tears streaking her cheeks. “Y/N I…” I try to find the right words but they fail me again. In the meantime a hundred chords play through my mind, deepening the grief I felt.

Suddenly a surge of panic grips me, my blood turns cold like it usually did when I thought about her leaving me. When I consider the depth of what this meant.

Deep down I couldn’t bear the thought of losing y/n but at the same time the unknown was playing at my fears, my anxiety. Imagine a future where she’s thousands of miles away. Everyone I know who talks about long-distance always gets their heart broken…distance never makes relationships stronger.

What if, I think, what if I just rip the bandaid off.

Wouldn’t that be the merciful thing to do? Instead of continuing to a point of no return. I mean what if we try long-distance, y/n creates a life in America, and realizes I was holding her back? What if we end up hating each other?

My brow feels slick and my heart pounds away. I clear my throat.

“I love you y/n.” I tuck her hair behind her ear.

“I love you too,” she whispers.

“After this summer, after you leave-“

“We don’t have to talk about this right now let’s just enjoy now and-“

“How can we?” I finally break. “How can we enjoy now when we know there’s an expiry date to all this!”

“Harry,” y/n grabs my hands. Attempts to soothe my anxiety but I’d passed the point of no return. The words continue to tumble out.

“What if…maybe it’s for the best if we…if we let go now.”

“What?” Shock colours y/n’s face and her eyes fill with tears. “What are you saying Har?”

“I don't want us to... to hurt each other trying to make this work.”

Her mouth hangs open and I can see her heart breaking in front of me. It kills me inside.

“But Har,” her voice grows desperate. “We talked about…we could…we’ll make it work-“

“Y/n,” now my own grows desperate. I wanted to stop talking about this, now that I’d made the decision to let go I wanted to just cut this loose and run away. “We’ll only hurt more.”

Her lower lip trembles and tears coat her bottom lash as she looks up at me through her top lashes. She whispers, “This isn’t fair.”

“I know,” I hang my head. “I’m sorry.”

And I was. I didn’t want to be the one to break us up but what choice did I have? I was doing it as the best case scenario.

Tears spill down y/n’s face and her voice is barely audible over the rustling of the cherry tree, “b-but I love you.”

I close my eyes for a brief moment, the sway of the leaves now roaring in my ears. Or maybe that was just the blood rushing to my face. I feel my heart turn to dust and my entire body aches as the weight of the decision coats me. “I love you too y/n. I love you now and always.”

I clasp her hand and squeeze it. She squeezes back, a sob pulled forth by the contact.

“Y/n…maybe this is how we say goodbye. On our own terms. With space to…to heal.”

Y/n cries harder and I pull her in, tucking her into me because she fit so perfectly in my contours. A part of me couldn’t believe I was doing this, I always imagined our goodbye at a Heathrow terminal under bright lights and linoleum floors.

We both cry into each other but I pull away first, I had to be the stronger one.

“I wish you nothing but the best,” I cup her face. “I…”

I didn’t know how to translate the dust of my heart. I kiss her one last time and then again on her forehead.

With that, I turn away unable to stand in the heartbreak. Every step away from her and the cherry tree feels impossible but I walk away from the girl who was my everything, feeling torn between the love I had for her and the fear of what the future would bring.

—

All I’d been thinking about was myself. About how I’d had friends who tried long distance and how their ending was more brutal than ripping the bandaid off from the get go.

That summer we avoided each other at parties, at our local haunts, and on the day she left I watched her car pull away from my bedroom window and leave forever with a leaden feeling in my heart. That I’d made a big mistake, too big to ever fix.

Tonight was the night I was supposed to set thing right. But things were just getting worse.

***

“After party!” Abe wraps his drunken arm around my shoulder. By then I’d sobered up with a quiet moment off to the side, smoking even though I’d tried to quit ten times in the last month. “I thought you quit that you cheeky bugger!”

“I’m going to,” I squish the cigarette against the wall. “You said after party?”

“After party!!” Ramo hollers coming up from behind. I take in the scene before me, the string lights were having their power cut, most of the tables were wiped clear of cutlery and tablecloths. Just like that the magical night Hailey and Micheal had been planning for months was over. Now they had their whole lives in front of them.

“Har?” Someone snaps a finger in front of my face.

“Huh?”

“Where’d you go?” A group had gathered in front of me, a mix of groomsmen and bridesmaid. Y/n isn’t one of them.

“What?” I ask again. “What’s this about an after party?”

“The party isn’t done,” someone replies.

“Please?!” I hear someone else say off to the side. Now that the music had also turned off it had gotten quieter in the venue.

I turn to the other conversation and see Hailey tugging y/n’s arms, trying to convince her of something. And just like that y/n’s eyes meet mine and something like resignation passes through them.

“-you in?” Michael claps my back and I’m jolted back to the crowd in front of me.

“Yeah,” I assumed they asked me about this after party. “Let’s keep the party going!”

Whooping ensures and everyone trickles out into the parking lot.

“Where is this again?” I ask whoever was closest to me.

“Schoolyard?” Clara answers. “If we don’t get kicked out for loitering that is.”

“We’ll just have to be quiet.”

Clara side eyes me and realizes I’m joking. She huffs a laugh. “It’s like hoping for your 1 year old to go to bed without a tantrum.”

“That’s right,” I suddenly remember. “You had a baby last year. Congrats on that Clara.”

She laughs again, “You’re sweet Harry. Thanks. It’s been a hell of a year but I’m a glutton for punishment because all I can think of is skipping the after party to bury my face in my daughter’s. She’s probably asleep though. I’d wake her up.”

I imagine Clara with her daughter, she was always mothering her friends when I’d hang out with y/n in school. “I can see you being a wonderful mum. Your daughter probably adores you.”

“Not as much as I adore her,” Clara sighs. I chuckle and another laugh comes from the other side of me. I startle to see y/n walking beside me.

How long had she been there? Our eyes meet and the smile she sends me is sweet and innocent. Like that day in school long ago when she walked in on me tinkering away on my guitar and asked me to play something for her.

It throws me off just like it did then. I turn away.

“We’re just gonna walk there!” Someone ahead of us shouts back to the group.

“In these heels?” Someone complains.

“The girls can take a car?” Hailey suggests. So some of the bridesmaids pile into one but Clara and y/n stay with Hailey.

“I’m sensible now,” Clara stretches her heel-less foot out. “Y/n you sure you don’t want the ride?”

“I’ve been dancing without these for the last two hours.” Y/n shrugs. “My feet can handle the walk.”

“Are we betting how long it takes to get kicked out?” I ask the remainder of the crew.

Bets start flying, I bet 40 minutes.

“D’you think the cherry tree is still there? That was probably the loveliest bit of our school every spring.” Clara asks. “I haven’t been back in ages.”

“Yeah!” Hailey pipes in. “We did some of our photos there when we did save the dates. We ended up using the ones at the garden though.”

I glance at y/n, I can’t help it. She has the same idea because she looks at me too. I didn’t understand what was happening tonight. I’d nearly given up on reconciling but here she was suddenly giving me softened looks, her hard edges dulling down enough for me to bump into her shoulder and try joking.

“Don’t get any ideas.”

“What?” She balks. “Ideas?!”

“Hey Har,” Hailey turns to me. “D’you still play? That guitar remembers guys? He was always playing that thing.”

I avoid y/n’s gaze now.

“Not really.”

“Harry’s a tight-ass finance bloke now,” Ramo says for me. “That creative spirit died after he and a little somebody-“

“I’m not,” I cut Ramo off knowing he was going to say something that would make all of us awkward. I continue to avoid y/n’s attention. “A tight-ass finance bloke. I like to think I’m a fine-ass finance bloke. And it’s because I just don’t get the time these days.”

“You were so good,” comes y/n’s thoughtful commentary.

“He was wasn’t he?!” Hailey continues. “Thought I’d see you on TV or something. That show with the contestants? I always thought if anyone from school went on there it’d be Harry.”

“Thanks Hailey,” I’m uncomfortable under everyone’s scrutiny. And the way Abe keeps wriggling his eyebrows at me and tilting his head to y/n.

By now we’ve reached the school grounds and watch as the rest of the girls scramble out of the car. I spot the cherry tree on the far side, no longer in bloom and smaller than I remember.

There’s a buzz about the group, like being together all these years later in the schoolyard brings with it some life-changing magic. Like time’s worn thin tonight and we can almost reach out and touch our school selves.

“Hailey and Michael!!” Ramo shouts incredibly loud. My 40 minute bet shrinks to 20. “Official Mr. And Mrs!! Let’s fucking go!!!”

They all take off down the field, open bottles dangling from their hands, jackets and gowns flying in the wind as they go.

I take off after them, laughing as a bubble of relief flows up from my lungs. It was just like before, running across the school field with my mates, laughing and shouting random shite into the world.

I glance to my side and y/n’s pumping her legs but falling behind the group. I hold out my hand without thinking but she comes to a full stop. So do I.

“These fucking heels.” She peels them off and sighs in relief, tossing them to the side and taking a swig of her wine bottle.

“You might need those later.”

“Fuck those heels!” She shouts louder.

I laugh and hold out my hand, “We’re falling behind. C’mon!”

She grabs it and we run to catch up, and I’m grinning so hard I feel like my cheeks are going to split. This might be an illusion of a moment I could only dream of but I didn’t care. Despite the night sky and nippy air, everything was sunny and golden.

The finish line was the cherry tree at the end of the yard and our friends pile around it, out of breath.

“Jesus I’ve got stitches,” Clara complains. “I’m never doing that again.”

Hailey giggles and wraps her arms around her husband. “I love all of you so much. Thanks for making this day so special.”

We all pour our love back to the couple. Alcohol and conversation begins to flow around the group and eventually I find y/n sitting beside me tugging at the grass.

“So you really don’t play anymore?” She asks softly after a while.

Her eyes are round and inquisitive as she asks, and I could drown in them. I think of everything I could tell her about not playing—how it made me think of her, how it hurt too much to play after a while, how that part of me was dead and I didn’t like to dredge it up anymore.

Instead I shake my head and leave it hanging, staring down into my lap.

“Why?” She whispers, edging closer to me so that our knees nearly touch. I wonder if she notices or if it even matters.

Again I think of all the reasons and my eyes fill with tears as I do. I’d shut away so much of myself because I had too much love for y/n that couldn’t go anywhere. I’d shut the love away and myself as well.

She taps my knee and I look up, her eyebrows scrunch together when she notices the tears.

“You were supposed to do big things with that guitar of yours,” she whispers to me. And it sounds exactly like something she would have said to me all those years ago. It’s too much. I take the bottle of wine sitting beside her and take a swig. She watches me with concern.

“Music,” I clear my throat when my voice comes out hoarse. “Music didn’t really hold the same magic afterwards. After we…I stopped…speaking in it.”

“Well fuck. That makes me really sad.”

“It’s alright—numbers became my new language.”

“How depressing!”

I laugh and cut myself short when it nearly turns into a sob.

I was sitting with y/n after all these years, under the cherry tree, and she was farther away than ever.

“I’m sorry,” I say again. “For being a chicken. Leaving before you left me. Then I just watched you go.”

Y/n opens her mouth and closes it after a second. Voices from the group drift over to us, Michael discussing honeymoon plans, Clara showing Dinis photos of her daughter, someone talking about a teacher we all hated.

“That was really sweet what you said to Clara earlier,” y/n says. It’s so random it takes me a second to recall.

“Oh yeah. Well she was always fussing over your friends like a mum. At least whenever I hung out with all of you.”

“She did. Makes sense she’s the first of us to be a mum. Although it wasn’t really planned—I’m really glad it turned out like this for her in the end.”

I nod, unsure where this was going.

“Har I-“ y/n’s voice sticks and she quiets again. It kills me to wait instead of telling her to spit it out.

“Y/n,” I say gently when she presses her lips together and doesn’t speak. I nudge her knee this time. “What?”

Our eyes meet and a galaxy of things rush between us. Memories, like distant stars, flicker with joy and pain. We’re caught between them—caught in the gravitational pull of the past and the very solid present of each other.

“I…I was hurting so bad after. After you said-after we broke up. I forgot you were probably hurting too. That the hurt could have always lingered too.” Y/n admits.

I forget to breathe as a constellation of emotions pools in our eyes, an ache from the unspoken admission that maybe we had missed each other all of this time.

“We were so young,” y/n continues. She picks at the grass. I imagine it helps feel in controls amidst the emotional storm happening between us.

“We were.”

“So free,” she laughs a little.

“Yeah. Too free. I don’t think I realized what I wanted until it was too late.”

“You had the whole summer,” the soft accusation cuts deep. I feel the gravity of how much it affected her.

“I was so scared of the hurt I…”

“Yet we hurt anyway.”

Those four words suck the oxygen out of my lungs, I couldn’t respond even if I wanted to.

We sit in another silence, I think about the version of us that didn’t leave the cherry tree separately. The version that kept holding on.

Maybe there could be a version of us that comes back to the cherry tree and leaves together this time. That thought spurs me into action.

I stand and brush the grass off my pants. Y/n watches me with a confused expression.

I hold my hand out to her for the second time that evening.

“Dance with me under the cherry tree?”

She flushes as our friends quiet down. But she grips my hand and I pull her up towards me.

“Really?” She whispers.

“Where’s the music?” One of our friends asks and as we begin our slow dance a phone breaks out in a slow number. It makes y/n giggle.

“This is incredibly cheesy.”

“Just embrace it.” I tell her. “The last time we were here-“

“We don’t have to keep talking about it,” she looks up at me. “It was so long ago. We can’t change the past. We really were young and we just have to-“

“Y/n,” I cut her off. “We were young but our love was real.”

This leaves her speechless. She simply furrows her brows and blinks away whatever emotion it pulls forth. And with her arms locked tightly behind me and my arms on her waist, we continue to sway. A quiet yearning defying time and distance fills the space between us; even as I pull her flush against me and she buries her face in my neck.

“That’s more like it,” I can hear Abe say in the back with a whistle before everyone laughs and goes back to chattering.

“So,” y/n says softly after a while. “When I blew you off at the wedding you were going to say something.”

I hardly remember. I was going to say a lot and I was probably a few drinks in.

“I lied.” She continues. “I tried to forget about you. I held onto the anger so I wouldn’t hurt when I thought about you. Then I looked you up every once in a while expecting some musical thing attached to your name but I never did see anything—now I know why.”

“Yeah,” I chuckle.

“So you really stopped after we broke up?”

“Yes,” I say again. “I tried that summer but everything sounded like…like a donkey trying to sing. I gave up on it ever sounding good again.”

“That’s a shame Harry,” she says and I know she means it but I don’t want to focus on me.

“So you looked me up did you?”

“Don’t start on that,” she flushes. I drop it but not the smile on my face. She notices and buries her face into my shoulder.

We continue swaying to whatever song was queued on our friends’ phone. It feels like we’re all 17 again and staying up later than our parents would like. It felt like we were all young and free, not 20-somethings sitting around our married friends.

“I can’t believe we’re all back here again.” I comment.

“I know. Feels fake. Especially being back here, with you.”

“I hope this is alright?” I pause but y/n tightens her grip.

“It is. Y’know no matter how many people filled the space after you.” Y/n says. “It was never you.”

My breath catches. Was she saying-

“Incoming!” Someone shouts and before I can ask where the group erupts in chaos. People run every way I’m surprised nobody bumps heads.

“What!?” I say just as a flashlight beam cuts across my face. The police. “Oh fuck! Let’s go!”

I grab y/n’s hand and we run away from whatever authority was stalking towards us with flashlights.

It’s just like the old days.

“Harry!” I hear Thomas yell up ahead and I veer to the right towards it.

“Ow! Shit!” I hear y/n shout behind me before she releases my hand.

“What? What are you doing?!” I rush back to her.

She’s picking a rock out of her foot, behind her the lights grow closer.

“Those fucking heels!” I shout.

“Bad decision!” She tosses another pebble off her foot.

“No time! Get on!”

“What?” She freezes but I turn around and crouch, tugging her arms around me so she can get the hint. She loops her legs around my waist and even though I’m slowed down we somehow make it, laughing and stumbling, towards Thomas and Abe. They wave at us from just beyond the school ground and once we make it in the clear we head back to the venue and our parked cars.

“That was insane,” they gush.

“Felt like the golden years,” I grin.

“The fucking golden years,” they laugh.

“Okay designated drivers,” Michael says when he catches sight of us. “We have to get out of here.”

There’s a final round of bidding the newlyweds adieu and waving them off. I look for y/n once they blink out of sight.

“I came with Jamie,” she wraps her arms around herself.

I take my jacket off and drape it around her. I’m transported to doing the exact same thing after house parties because y/n would complain that a jacket would ruin her outfit and then walk home shivering.

“What if you go home with someone else?” I ask.

“You’ve got a car?”

“No,” I regret not driving myself now. “I came with one of the boys.”

“Shite.”

“Yeah…”

“Where are you staying?” She asks.

“Uhm…I came from my flat. Near Shoreditch.”

“Oh right.” She looks away. “You live in the city…right. I’m staying at my mum’s.”

“That’s not too far. My parents still live down the road from yours.”

“I know,” she smiles. “What if you dropped me home? And I invite you in?”

“Y/n,” I tug her closer. “What’s this you’re suggesting?”

“Staying?”

The sight of her, the feel of her, her scent and her perfect hand on my chest envelop me. I couldn’t say no; I was under her spell.

“That would turn this amazing evening into an amazing weekend.”

“And who knows what comes next,” she whispers as I lean the rest of the way. I want to kiss her.

“I want to kiss you.”

She doesn’t respond. She simply stretches up and presses her lips to mine. My heart collects itself and explodes in an explosion of slime.

She feels the exact same, tastes the same, but the confidence is new. It makes me dizzy. I want her even more.

“Get a fucking room!” Thomas says from behind. “Are you two gonna need a ride or planning on shagging in the bushes over there?”

I flip him off and finish the perfect kiss, using every bit of my willpower as y/n’s hand trails down my neck and back to my chest.

“Go on,” I say without even looking at my friends. “We’ve got an after after party.”

“Gross,” someone grumbles behind us.

“G’night!” Y/n shouts and with our chests heaving we break apart, grab hold of each other’s hands, and begin the walk to her house.

We walk in silence—our hands swinging between us tells you everything you need to know about how we were feeling.

At her front door y/n smiles up at me. It feels like deja vu, standing in her doorway with her looking at me like that. Knowing we were going to her bedroom just to get in bed. Time folds in on itself as I press a kiss to her lips.

“I’m so glad I couldn’t stay angry tonight,” she strokes my face. “I would’ve missed all this.”

“Me too,” I whisper. “I’m glad my mug’s so handsome it wore you down.”

She rolls her eyes but she’s smiling. “It wasn’t the mug. Although it is even more handsome than the last time I saw it.”

I kiss her, “Mmm then what was it that wore you down?”

“I dunno,” she sighs. “You? Us?”

Us.

“Whatever it was, I’ll make sure to write it a thank you note. Now why don’t you open that door because my hands are not going to stay PG for very long. And I’m pretty sure your mum’s got one of those camera doorbells.”

“Oh god,” she whips around and laughs before slapping a hand to her mouth. “Sorry mum!”

We stifle our laugh and step inside. Deja vu comes rushing at me again at the familiarity of her home.

As we sneak up to her room I think about what y/n said. It was true, even though she couldn’t pinpoint it. Despite how we felt at the beginning of the night it was always going to end this way. Something about us was always meant to come back to each other.

You. Us. Her.

It was always her.

[auspicioustidings]

Ae Fond Kiss - Part 7

My Heart's in the Highlands

Summary: You speak with your kid and establish a new normal. A conversation is had with Johnny. Words: 2.6k TWs: mention of miscarriage

Parts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

The drive home was silent. Your mind was a mess but you tried to slow down your racing thoughts and put your parent head on. It was so hard right now to be a parent when you felt like an out of control child. You tried to run through a script in your mind, a way to explain what was going on to Joey without bringing your own bitterness into it. 

The kid in question seemed no more willing to have the conversation than you were. He was staring out the window. He seemed exhausted. You could understand that, the emotional gauntlet he had been going through with his parents not even there to help… God you felt awful. 

“...let’s get the mega-ultra sundae” you decided, indicating to turn off towards the ice-cream parlour.

“That’s for like 20 people. Luna from school said her brothers tried to eat it all and they threw up.”

“How many brothers does she have again?”

“Four. One of them does football at uni, two are on the high school team and the last one just won a boxing competition.”

“Well I guess we’re about to embarrass Luna’s brothers.”

You glanced over to him and he looked to you, both with tentative smiles. This was still your kid, you were still his mother, and you were going to eat enough ice-cream that you’d both spend the evening curled up on the sofa feeling sick and watching bad movies. You didn’t know how you ever got so lucky. You could strangle both of his dads, but you could never not appreciate the hand they had in this brilliant boy. 

While you immediately knew the mega-ultra sundae was a mistake when the server struggled to put it on the table due to the weight, you both grinned anyway. The first few spoonfuls you just took the time to think about what to say. 

“Did you really think he was dead?” Joe asked, carefully digging for marshmallows.

“We both did, me and your dad. I think… I think uncle John might have known he wasn’t and I’m very angry with him over it” you answered, aiming for complete honesty. 

“Was the stuff you said about him true?”

You thought on that while you took a mouthful of what you had thought was mostly ice cream but was almost 100% whipped cream. You had told Joe all about Johnny even if you lied about just what he was to him. You had told him how brave he was, how loving. How when he got really excited you and Simon could barely understand half the words that came out of his mouth. You’d told him about his temper, how he would explode and then after need to nap it off before profusely apologising. And God was he clever even if he seemed like a big dumb idiot sometimes. He could make an explosive out of anything and on New Years he usually did. 

“Yeah. We never lied about the kind of man he was, just… it felt scary to tell you he was your father. We should have told you. We shouldn’t have hidden it because we were scared about what you might think.”

“What would I think?”

You could still hear Johnny yelling in your head. You were afraid Joe would think what he did, that you loving Simon even when you thought he was dead was a betrayal. Although now you knew that you had been betrayed it felt like such a stupid fear.

“I didn’t want you to think of your dad differently because he wasn’t your birth father. And I… for some people me falling in love with Johnny’s best friend after he died was wrong. I just didn’t want you to think that.”

Joey thought on that for a while as he kept working on the sundae which didn’t seem like it had decreased in volume at all. You hated putting all of this on a 9 year old. He should be telling you all about the football game and explaining again how he could build a computer in Minecraft, not considering how he felt about finding out a war hero whose death was faked by the military was his father. God you hoped Kyle hadn’t known.

“I think it’s ok” he said eventually as he chewed through a chunk of meringue. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. It’s pretty cool that I have another dad. Does he always sound like that? Did he really take on a whole town of bad guys and win with dad?”

You shoved another spoonful in your mouth even though you were feeling a little nauseous because if you didn’t try and distract yourself with something you’d cry. He was supposed to yell at you, he was supposed to be mad and turn off his hearing aids so he couldn’t listen to your apologies. But that wasn’t the kid you and Simon had raised. Yeah he could get angry, but he was so good at cooling off and moving on and fixing the issue. 

So you told him all about Johnny but this time in present tense, you both gave the mega-ultra sundae your best shot and then you ran to the bathroom as soon as you got home to throw up which your kid did not let you live down as you watched a bunch of superhero movies. 

–

You didn’t think anyone but you three could pull it off, but somehow life went on. Simon and Johnny arranged a meeting with you and it was decided who would do what. School runs were completely off your plate, they’d share that between them and it seemed like a good way to have J be able to get to know his biological father in small, casual chunks. 

You did offer to let them stay in the guest room, but Simon could read you well enough to know that right now you really did not want to be around them and you were offering for the sake of keeping the peace, so he said no. He was staying in an airbnb nearby and Johnny to your surprise outright bought himself a flat the second week. Not really your business, but part of you felt your heart break that he had just accepted so quickly that you’d be separate for the rest of your lives. 

You never asked about what was going on with the two of them. Maybe it was cowardly, but you didn’t want to know. If they were together, then it would feel like you were always just the second choice and now they would be happy without you. If they weren’t, then it would feel like they were only holding back out of their love and respect for you which was no doubt making them miserable. Did you want them to be miserable? You didn’t know, the answer changed depending on the time of day.

You’d had a dream this morning of the two of them together, had woken up wet and needy and had let your hand wander between your legs to finish yourself off to the fantasy of it. Afterwards you promptly threw up and spent the rest of the day in bed feeling awful until J got back from football practice. Johnny had taken him and they were laughing together. He had taken one look at you and invited himself in, saying he’d order take away and get Joe to bed after dinner so you should just relax. You felt too ill and exhausted to really argue.

Joe was in bed and you were tidying away the leftovers when Johnny came back downstairs into the kitchen. It was the first time the two of you had been alone together. 

“Sorry, you used tae love cashews” he said.

“I still do. The place is usually really good as well, just really couldn’t stomach them today” you replied, frowning at the container as you put it away because it really had been sort of gross but Joey had tried some and said he’d eat the leftovers. 

“I can go grab something from the shops if ye want? Ye didnae eat an awful lot.”

You closed the fridge and raised an eyebrow at him. 

“..I’m naw Senga’ing!” he protested, knowing that raised eyebrow well.

“You’re Senga’ing a little.”

“Naw I’m not!”

“I dunno Johnny, if it worries like a Senga and fusses like a Senga…”

He threw a tea towel at you and you laughed. Senga was your old neighbour's very moody hen who treated the two of you like unruly chicks whenever you were out the back garden. It was sort of comforting to know the old Johnny from nearly a decade ago was still here, but bittersweet that he wasn’t yours anymore. 

“I…” you started, but trailed off because you didn’t know what you wanted to say.

You had spent weeks with the anger at finding out what had happened being difficult to predict. Sometimes you felt it so intensely, sometimes it faded away. It was all so long ago now. You were a different person. You all were. 

“I shouldnae have… well let’s be honest there’s a hunner things I shouldnae have done, but just going for recently I shouldnae ever have tried tae say it was wrong of ye to marry Simon. Especially naw when I knew myself that he…” he trailed off.

“That he’s easy to fall in love with” you finished for him, hearing almost a tone of commiseration in your voice. 

“Is easy the word?”

“Fair enough. I hated him at the start. Considered breaking things off with you more than once just so I didn’t have to be around him anymore.”

“I broke two of my fingers trying tae break his nose the first month on the task force.”

You gave a dramatic gasp and pointed accusingly at him. 

“And you never told me?! How did I not know this?”

“Cause it’s a pure riddy. Tried tae punch him with his mask on and he didnae feel a fucking thing. Didnae even try get me intae trouble for it either, just ordered me tae go to medical like a pure dick.”

You could imagine how mad that would have made Johnny and you could absolutely imagine how smug Simon would have been about the whole thing. One regret you had was the times you avoided going out with Johnny’s friends because you sort of wished now you had seen them together more. At the time you were young and so sure that Simon Riley was just a misogynistic tosser that you avoided him and you knew now you had probably missed out on so much. Maybe you’d have noticed how they felt about one another had you given him a chance. 

“I wanted to strangle him so much at the start. No clue how it turned into what it did. He didn’t even propose with a ring, just asked if I wanted to get married in the kitchen on a whim.”

Johnny looked horrified on your behalf.

“Absolute roaster! How in the fuck did both of us fall for such a wanker?”

The two of you took a beat to decide how you felt about this all being out in the open and then laughed together until you cried. God it was nice to just laugh about it. You’d never get over what the two of them did a decade ago, not really, but you didn’t want it to turn you bitter. You didn’t want to forget all the good things. And you wanted them both in Joseph’s life, you wanted him to get all of the love and support you knew these men were capable of. 

You wiped away a tear and sighed, leaning on the counter and looking at Johnny with a sort of sad smile. 

“I wish you had just told me how you felt about him. It’s not that you fell in love with him that hurt, it was that you didn’t trust me enough to tell me.”

Fuck, you guessed you knew how Joe felt now. Too scared to tell him the truth because you had imagined the worst of his reaction. 

“I was a shite husband. Naw even just what happened with Si, but all of it. Should never have taken that job without talking tae ye first. All well and good saying it was for your protection, but I should have trusted that ye wouldnae have told anyone, that ye’d have done your part if ye’d agreed tae it. Should never have taken that choice off of you.”

“Why the change of heart now?”

“Guess I’ve done some growing up. Over the last 9 years it’s naw been the soldiers that have been saving the world most of the time, it’s been the civilians. I used tae think I was some big hero just because I wore the uniform, but I was just being an arrogant prick. I hate that I treated ye like ye were less capable of making decisions because ye didnae have a set of fucking epaulettes. Never really deserved ye.”

“I’m sorry that you took it all on yourself. It must have been awful being alone all this time in enemy territory. Look, I’m pissed that you took the job, Price has been laying low because he knows I’m going to boot him in the balls next time I see him, but I know you did it to help people. And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry I never told you about… about that night with Simon.”

“I’m so so fucking sorry ye went through that bonnie, I cannae imagine” he said, and you knew he was sincere with the moisture gathering in his eyes. 

It was an old wound for you now, but this was new for him you realised. He hadn’t know until a few weeks ago that Joey may have had an older sibling. Remembering how painful it had been back then before time had healed you, you felt the sudden urge to hug him knowing there was a good chance this was still so raw for him. So you did.

He held you tight and buried his face in your hair like he used to. He smelled almost the same, although there was something a little less wild about him now. How long had it been since he had just been held? 9 years on mission, 9 years of the world on his shoulders. Fuck you almost wished Simon had known, then at least he would have had him to come back to without the complication of the lie between them. 

You stayed like that for a while, just clinging to one another in the kitchen. God you had missed him so damn much. You were just so angry that he had been alive all this time. So much time wasted. So many choices that could have changed things. If he had told you back then how he felt about Simon, what would you have done? If you had told him about the miscarriage, would it have changed things? But it was too late for any of that now. 

So when you broke apart and you took a breath to ask if he’d like to stay over, he beat you to it and said he’d best get going. Probably for the best.

“Why did you buy the place anyway? I thought you hated it down here, heart in the highlands and all that.”

“My heart’s in the highlands, but the highlands was never really about the place, it was about the person there in it with me. But the flat’s also close tae the uni Joe said he wants tae go to. I ken that he’s only little now so he might change his mind, but I wanted it tae be there for him just incase and it’s naw like I cannae buy another place for him if he goes somewhere else.”

You shoved him out of the door before you could go against your own best interests and kiss him.

[hearts4thetr1pl3ts]

𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙗𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨. | 𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙩 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙤𝙡𝙤

"𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒂 𝒃𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔…"✎

pairing: matt sturniolo x reader

genre: fluff

synopsis: you and matt are best friends, but could there be something more between you two?

warnings: use of y/n, cursing, kissing, lmk if I forgot anything!

note: this is my first fic so I'm sorry if its garbage <3 also I would recommend playing the song a few times because this is a little long!

you and matt have been best friends for what seems like a lifetime. over the course of the last few years you developed a crush on him. does he feel the same? you don't know. right now you're sitting in your room. just scrolling on tiktok, when you get a text from matt.

you get up from your bed to change into a better outfit and put on some makeup. once you're ready, you sit on your couch and wait for matt. after a few minutes, someone knocks on your door. It's matt.

"hey matt" you say, greeting him with a hug, slightly blushing...

he looked absolutely fucking amazing. well, as usual.

"hey y/nnn, c'mon we're going to my house" he says as he returns the hug with a faint blush on his face.

you and him walk out to his car and drive to his house. once you arrive, both of you walk inside and are greeted by nick and chris.

"hey y/nn" "hiii y/nnnn!" "hey guys" you say as you and matt walk off into his room

"so why did you wanna hang out?" you question matt once you guys get in his room.

"i was bored and wanted the company of my best friendd" he says with a shrug.

"oh okay, wanna watch a movie?" you ask him as you sit on his bed.

"sure" he says, sitting next to you, cuddling up to you as you play a movie.

you and matt cuddle all the time as friends, but it feels different now. it’s like you're cuddling more as a couple than as friends. his hand placement gives you constant butterflies.

once the movie ends matt asks you a..rather off topic question.

"y/n what's your favorite flower?" he asks you.

"tulips, especially the white ones. why?" you respond with a questioning tone.

"no reason"

"um okay..?" you say, slightly confused. why is he asking you this?

the rest of the night passes by as you both hang out, laugh, and have fun. eventually, it gets late, and matt drives you home for the night.

"bye y/n! love you!" he shouted out his car window before leaving after dropping you off home.

"love you toooo!!" you shouted back.

again, you and matt say it as friends. but its felt different. butterflies swirl around your stomach again.

you go inside and get changed into some pajamas and just go to bed.

the next morning you wake up to a rather unusual text from matt..?

you get up, still tired as hell and walk over to your front door.

nobody's there? until you look down. you see the most beautiful bouquet of white tulips on the ground. attached is a letter..?

you cover your mouth in awe, pick up the flowers and letter, and go inside. you set the flowers on the table and open the letter. there are barely any words on it, but the words written mean absolutely everything to you.

"I wanna be yours. M.S."

you know exactly who "M.S." is so you immediately text him.

as he said he would, he came straight to your house.

you see him pull up and getting out of his car so you run outside as fast as you can and pull him into a long, tight hug.

"you like me?" you question.

"not like. love. i'm in love with you y/n. i’m so damn in love with you it hurts." he says, slightly pulling away from the hug and using his hand to tilt your head up to look at him by your chin.

"i'm so in love with you too." you say, blushing and smiling like a little kid, not breaking eye contact at all..

he smiles and begins to speak again.

"can i kiss you..?" he questions, a hint of nervousness in his voice.

you nod you head immediately and he leans slightly down, connecting his lips with yours in a romantic, passionate kiss.

after a few seconds he pulls away.

"i love you y/n."

"i love you too matt."

"so...wanna watch a movie..?" he says smiling.

you nod your head and you both go inside to watch a movie. this time, the cuddling isn't in a friend way. its in a couple way.

noteee: omg this took me foreverrrrr but it was so fun to write, I hope you guys liked it :))

[aureatchi]

.🕷.𖥔 ݁ ˖ WHAT A SCAREDY CAT ! — nakahara chuuya

“aw, poor baby. movie too scary, doll?” “shut up chuuya.”

a/n. it’s spooky szn !! so of course i need to write something fit for the occasion…so,, why not do it w my fav ginger-haired!

info. fem!reader. fluff. lowercase ✎. profanities. horror movies, drinking, small argument. it gets suggestive sjwsj, neck kissing. wc. 1.9k

“oh, this is so cute.” 

you and your lover both shared an eye for aesthetics. that’s why you gazed so proudly at the coffee table in front of you when you stepped back to see the finished product—the rounded table was filled to the curved edges with your favorite takeout meal, bowls of junk sweets to indulge in after, popcorn, two wine glasses, and accompanying of course, a bottle of wine. other than the food, there were two lit candles to set the ambiance of the space, and a jack-o-lantern chuuya had carved himself. 

all were organized beside each other to make it look like it came out of a pinterest post.

“i agree,” chuuya replied with a smug smile, also proud of your combined work. he joined you on the side. 

you grabbed your digital camera resting on your couch and took a picture of the cozy scene. 

“before it all gets ruined,” you chuckled. 

chuuya then took the camera, turning the lens towards the both of you. 

“let’s take a few together,” he said, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to pose. you and chuuya were also wearing matching pajamas: black tees and halloween themed pants. 

“okay!” 

click! click! click! 

the trio included a picture of you holding up a heart with your hands as chuuya’s arm encased around you, a picture of you turned towards him with your arms around his neck (you realized the flash was very bright), and one more of you kissing his cheek. 

“awh!” you widely grinned as you looked through them, giggling to yourself when you noticed how the camera captured chuuya’s conspicuous blush in the last photo. 

“what’chu laughing at?” he asked, looking over your shoulder. 

“nothing, it’s just cute,” you replied, putting your camera away. “can we eat now?” 

“yeah,” he replied, motioning towards the snug sofa nuzzled with your cushiest of blankets.

you enveloped them around you as chuuya grabbed the remote control to browse movies on the tv. 

RANKED #1 HORROR MOVIE THIS YEAR!

“wanna watch this?” chuuya asked, hovering the selection over the movie. “i just realized we’ve never watched a horror movie together.” 

“yeah, if you want me screaming and retreating on your lap every five minutes.” 

“exactly,” he replied, smirking. “that would be nice⎯”

“too bad. i was joking. i don’t get scared easily.” 

you held an opposing smirk back, but in reality, you did get agitated easily, especially when jumpscares were involved. but you felt stubborn and didn’t want to give what chuuya wanted, so you decided to take it on as a challenge. 

and he seemed to sense your game too. “better not catch ya lying, doll. there’s consequences for everything.” 

“what do you mean by that?” you asked, your face heating up, but he gave no answer to your avail. now you really had a challenge. 

“…whatever. i don’t need to know anyway. i’m not getting scared.” 

“hm,” chuuya said as he clicked on the movie. up popped a screen with the synopsis of the two-hour film, including all of the content warnings. 

…murder, blood, sudden jumpscares…

oh shoot.

chuuya pressed play, and immediately, the movie started.

…

the first twenty minutes were actually okay. there hadn’t been anything too much to frighten you yet⎯eerie music, corporate workers, and dark rooms were the only thing you had seen so far. 

“damn, when does this good?” chuuya mumbled, finishing eating the last of your main course. 

you were glad things hadn’t been intimidating to you so far. but you also knew your lover was awaiting for something to happen, something to cause him to win.

that wasn’t going to happen. 

you were snacking on the bucket of popcorn when suddenly, a creepy humanoid creature engulfed the screen, accompanied by a petrifying sound. there was no way to see that coming⎯there was no warning. you couldn’t help but squeal and jump slightly on the couch, the bucket of popcorn following. luckily, it wasn’t so much that it fell and made a mess. 

“o-oh shoot! chuuya, i thought i saw a spider!” you said right after the moment passed, turning your head and making it look like you were searching the cushions for a spider. you knew he was watching for your reaction the entire time. 

“spider, yeah?” chuuya asked, amused. “nice excuse, sweetheart.” 

you crossed your arms. “okay! that was a mild reaction! i didn’t jump on you so that doesn’t count.” 

“scared yet?” 

“nope!” you popped the p. yet, a shiver went down your spine.

you continued watching the movie. more horror started to seep in, grisly scenes causing unease. you weren’t sure if you preferred those drawn-out sights to the jumpscares, but you could hide your reactions better with the former. you hadn’t seen any more sudden clips yet, thankfully. 

“yikes,” you and chuuya said when a corpse got shot multiple times even after they already died and then mutilated. 

“i’m opening the wine,” chuuya said about an hour and thirty minutes into the movie. 

“alright,” you replied, not opposing. you probably even supported it. maybe if you drank a little, you wouldn’t scare so easy.

especially because you could feel the plot’s climax approaching. you were already suffocating a couple of pillows on your lap in anxiousness. 

chuuya poured the glasses and handed one to you. you quietly finished yours quickly so you could have it refilled. 

“oh shit!” you shouted when the main character suddenly made a super stupid decision⎯as you probably did too by pretending that you didn’t spooked⎯of course resulting in a chase by the disgusting creature that popped out of nowhere earlier. you clutched the pillows even harder, but you couldn’t take your eyes off the screen. you needed to prove to chuuya you weren’t lying to him. 

the wine was not strong enough against the fear-fueled adrenaline that surged through you, paralleling the intensifying background music. 

stupid chuuya. he made sure the volume was cinema-loud. it did not help trying to drown out the creepy atmosphere that engulfed the entire room. 

the figure suddenly appeared in front of the protagonist with a dramatic scream.

“AHH!” you screamed too, but immediately bit down on your hand right after. 

but then it happened again. the main character turned a corner, and it popped up again, even more disturbing than the last time. 

“AHHH!” 

you screamed again, jumping on chuuya to try and bury your face on his neck. your heart was racing from the images you had seen. 

but he had other plans. 

“aw, poor baby. movie too scary, doll?” 

“shut up chuuya!” you replied, yet you still gripped tightly on his shirt. 

but then, chuuya pushed you off of him.  

“chuuya!” you tried to climb back on him, but something was preventing you from making contact with his skin. 

“…are you using gravity manipulation?!”

“i thought you said you wouldn’t get scared,” he taunted with a smirk. “eyes on the screen, brave girl.” 

“you’re so mean!” you shouted, but faced back toward the tv. he had even gone out of his way to use his ability to turn your own words against yourse⎯

“AHHH! WHATTHEFUCK!” 

you were already screaming as the creature finally caught the main character, but you weren’t alone as chuuya cursed and pulled you on top of him, horrified.

“DAMMIT. what the hell was THAT?” 

“put us down, we’re FLOATING!” you cried. it didn’t help at all that you were both scared and floating above all solid surface, even though it was only about three feet.

“s-shit, sorry!” 

he rested the both of you down on the sofa once again. you had missed most of the eerie epilogue, but you didn’t really care when your brain had now conjured a new character for your nightmares. 

chuuya poured the last of the bottle’s contents into your glasses and handed you yours. you finished the cherry-red liquid instantly to try to get some relief. 

you turned towards chuuya right after to see that he had done the same. and then, you broke out laughing. 

the ginger-haired raised an eyebrow and glared back at you as you continued to stare at him and snicker.

“i-i didn’t know YOU were a scaredy cat,” you tried to speak, but it was hard when you were overcome by laughter. your stomach was hurting and your chest was heaving, but you couldn’t stop. 

“shut up!” he shouted. 

“i-i can’t!” you replied, continuing to laugh. “how ironic⎯it’s one thing for me, but the port mafia executive? getting scared?!” 

you were only silenced when chuuya had pulled you on his waist once again. 

“if you didn’t think you were in trouble for lying, you definitely are now.” 

you immediately stopped, staring into his eyes. you had forgotten about his temper.

“wait, i’m sorry!” but your apology was futile because you were immediately lifted once again but this time, higher and alone.

“put me down, chuuya, i’m sorry!” you screamed, about eleven feet off of the floor. you really hated his ability sometimes.

“why should i?!” he observed you from the couch, trying to grab onto something but stuck inside a sphere of air. he would never try to hurt you, even while he was mad, but currently, his ego had been offended by your words.

“i was joking, chuu! i didn’t actually mean it⎯i promise! i’m sorry, i’ll make it up to you.”

you were slowly lowered, relieved once your legs hit the couch.

“i’m sorry,” he said, quietly after you had made sure you could stand on floor again. “i got carried away, plus you weren’t wrong.” he sighed at the confession.

“it’s okay,” you replied, straddling his lap. “that just makes the two of us scaredy cats. i think that’s cute.” you booped him on the nose.

“but you’re the bigger one,” chuuya provoked.

“no! you are!”

“you are!”

“you are!”

“who’s the one on my lap?” he asked, moving a piece of your hair out of your face as he smirked. “just as she foreshadowed earlier too?”

“shut up,” you replied, but he had gotten you where he wanted in the end. “want a trophy or something?”

“no, you’re just gonna make it up to me now.“

he pulled you closer, and kissed you softly, seeing if your reaction would allow him to continue.

you pulled back. “if this is what i have to do, that’s easy.” you leaned back in and resumed the kiss, lifting your hands to play with chuuya’s hair. you could still taste the wine on his lips⎯it made you feel even more high combined with the tension between you two as he kissed you deeper.

he pulled back for the both of you to catch breath and then spoke.

“you’re funny if you think that’s it, doll.”

he moved one of his hands to move your hair away from your neck and the other to cup your cheek on the opposite side.

he started kissing there, and then, sucking.

“…chuuya?”

“this is for lying to me,” he said, focusing on the spot. once he was done, he moved to another.

“and for making fun of me.” he sucked again, until your neck had two new red marks.

“…keep going.”

“yeah? want more?”

“yes. it helps me not think of that scary murderer in the movie.” chuuya laughed.

“alright, i’ll help take the scaredy cat’s mind off of the things that bring her fear.”

“hey! stop calling me th⎯”

you were silenced as he went back to what he was doing, until your entire neck was filled with shades of red.

reblogs are cherished. <3

© AUREATCHI 2023. no reposts or translations. do not steal — including this post’s banners (they’re mine).

[allfryam]

mama’s boy

Bobby was an all star athlete at his high school. It was his senior year and he was captain of the football team. His perfect curly hair complemented his perfect face. And his perfect face just made his perfect body look even better. He was lean, with chiseled abs and toned muscles. He was perfect in every way. Nothing could ever change that.

one day at football practice, Bobby was d doing drills when one of his teammates tackled him from behind and landed on his foot. With a loud crunch, Bobby yelled as he looked down to see his leg was going in the wrong direction. He was rushed to the hospital and quickly X-rayed. “It’s a nasty break. Will definitely take at least 3-4 months to completely heal.” The doctor said. Bobby felt like his entire world just collapsed. “I don’t want you to do any physical activity for the next 3 months. That includes walking! I will have your teachers send you your work online so you can do it from home.” He said. Bobby’s mom nodded and drove him home.

Bobby laid in bed staring at his ceiling. His leg was resting on some pillows to give it elevation. “Can I get you anything sweetie?” Bobby’s mom asked. “Pizza. I’m starving”. He said. “Sure sweetie.” She said as she began to call dominos.

over the next few days. Bobby fell into a rhythm. He didn’t bother getting dressed anymore, so he laid in his underwear most days. He just laid there and watched movies or played on his computer. There was a small upside to this though. Bobby discovered his mom felt bad and would bring him anything he asked for. Whenever Bobby was hungry or thirsty, he would just say the magic word… “MOOOOOM” and she would rush in and ask him what he needed. She normally didn’t like him eating too much junk food, but under the circumstances, she let him eat anything. This didn’t come without consequences however.

after a couple weeks, Bobby’s mom had noticed something. When looking at Bobby’s stomach she had noticed his abs begin to slowly disappear. There was a bit of pudge growing on his midsection. “Sweetheart, maybe you should try to eat just a little bit healthier.” She said one day. “Mom! Are you calling me fat?! You are such an asshole! Bring me some donuts!” Bobby snapped back. Scared, Bobby’s mom ran off to pick up some donuts. Bobby looked down at his pudgy belly. He squeezed it and shook it a little. It jiggled. Hmm. Must just be a little water weight. He would work it off when he could play football again. Later he ate every last one of the dozen donuts his mom brought home.

after 3 months was up, Bobby was fatter than ever. His bit of pudge had grown into a ball hit that sat happily on top of him. A bit of fuzz had grown on his belly and his belly button had become deep. Bobby hardly noticed. After examining his leg, the doctor determined Bobby was ready to get back onto the football field. Bobby was ecstatic. His first day back at practice. All of his teammates slapped and grabbed Bobby’s gut. “Dude. How did you get so fat?” “That no exercise thing really took its toll on you huh?” “What’s up pudgy!” Bobby shrugged it off and tried to put on his jersey. He struggled with it for a minute until finally getting it the cover his gut. His tight pants hugged his thighs that were significantly bigger than the last time he wore them.

practice was awful. Bobby was slow, out of breath, and his stomach was in the way of everything. He laid in bed and called for his mom. “Mom bring me a pizza” he said. “Gut up and get it yourself.” She replied. “ your leg isn’t broken anymore.” Bobby huffed and waddled to the phone to buy a pizza. The next day at practice, Bobby had an idea. “Jake! Tackle me. Hard.” Bobby said. “You sure? I don’t want you gettin hurt again.” Jake said. “I’m fine. Just do it” Jake ran full speed and leaped onto Bobby. With another crunch, Bobby was back in bed with a broken leg. He smiled as he downed a cheeseburger in two bites.

[mymelodymia]

Daddys little girl Dad!Tony stark x baby!daughter!reader

Summary: you are tony starks baby girl <3

Warnings: nothing just fluff 🥰

A/N: my acc hasn't been getting much attention lately. I hope this gets as big as my fics used to be. Also im using the same way you met tony as in toddler years

+•°+*°•+

Being tony starks daughter had lots of benefits, but also lots of bad parts as well. But for now we're focusing on the good parts. Let's start at the beginning.

One day, mid (birth month) the door bell rang. Tony, the famous billionaire playboy, walked out of his garage and turned the corner. Given that the whole wall of the front door was glass, tony saw right through it.

No one was there. Only a small cardboard box, layered with a multi colored blanket. He stepped closer, Jarvis opening the door. He saw a baby looking like it was fresh out the womb.

You, had a envelope in your tiny hands. Tony bent down and took it from your grasp. And along with this note (and angel) came a bag. Which held a single bottle, three diapers, a white onesie, identical to the one you were wearing, and your birth certificate. Only his name was on the paper. You didn't even have an identity yet. Tony opened the letter and read it.

'Dear tony. Shes only 2 weeks old and driving me insane. I dont care what you do with her, whether you put her up for adoption i dont care what you do. But shes yours now, feel free to get a DNA test. Just get her the fuck away from me.'

"What a bitch" tony muttered under his breath, looking down at you, he couldn't help feel the need to take you in. You were his after all.

"Sir, if you do not want the child, we can send it to mr rhodes" Jarvis suggested, tony immediately turning him down "no, no dont do that"

He picked you up, and took your blanket as well, quickly he wrapped you in the small blanket.

He walked over to the couch, staring at you the whole way there.

You began to flutter your eyelids. Tony gasped for no reason at all, his heart began to race slightly. He was about to meet his daughter.

You opened your eyes, and they locked with tonys, you both just stared at each other for a while. Before you, the curious little baby, reached up as high as you could. Your fingers brushing his cheeks.

You cooed, making him smile, which made you smile. You let out a small happy noise. Before tony stood up, and walked toward the front door.

He grabbed the bag and headed upstairs to his bedroom, not taking his eyes off of you.

He sat down on his bed, that was three times his size. And set you down on the mattress. And turned on a movie on the plasma tv mounted to the wall.

After a few minutes, he had noticed you had completely soiled your diaper, he picked you up and put a towel on his dresser, after a few failed attempts, he successfully changed you.

He called happy and pepper, who came as fast as they could given that he called and said "hey so i just found out im a father, i need you to come quick, thanks bye" and hung up.

They both arrived at the same time, and after a small argument over his choice of words on the phone call. Tony sent them out to go get bottles, diapers, formula, etc.

And for the meantime, tony spent some time with you. Your large e/c eyes looking around on awe.

You were beautiful. (Still are) and tony made sure you knew that.

He felt quite stressed given that you did not have a name, and that he had to choose one. He would definitely be one of those guys who picks a name with a meaning.

Eventually, he settled for y/n y/m/n stark. Your first and middle names perfectly fitting in with your last. It had a nice ring to it.

After a moment your eyes began to droop. Tony took note of this and held you to his chest, patting you on the back (be careful tony)

He rocked you to sleep, and once you fell into this slumber, he whipped out his laptop. And after a few hours of online shopping and a couple thousand dollars, everything he needed to take care of you was on its way.

+•°+*°•+

The next few days, most of the packages were there. Including the crib. The past days he had been forced to put you in a laundry basket, that he stuffed had with his pillows. (The first time you fell in love with his scent)

It took both happy and tony to get it through the house. And after multiple arguments, being ended by you crying because they were loud. And pepper taking care of you in the meantime. five hours later the crib was officially in one piece.

Tony also bought a crib that was transparent on the sides so he could keep an eye on you in the living room, but sadly you were too small for that so they decided to save another 7 hours and not put that together now.

Once all of the packages had arrived, tony had happy took all of the packages to tonys bedroom. Then went home.

Tony put your crib right next to his bed, and in a corner he had the changing table, which doubled as a dresser, put in a corner next to a rocking chair for him to lull you to sleep.

He heard you whimper from across the room, he turned to the clock, and it read 10:48 pm.

He walked over to you as you started to cry. He immediately sprung into action and grabbed you, resting you on his chest patting your back.

"You must be hungry, my little y/n" (ahaha. Do you see the connection)

He walked downstairs to feed you. Once he was done with this task, he sat at the rocking chair and sung you a lullaby (or AC/DC in a soft tone 🤷‍♀️)

When you fell asleep, he decided he needed sleep to (for once) though it was quite early for him, he did need to sleep given that he now had you, and thought he needed some extra sleep.

+•°+*°•+

The next morning he was woken up at four in the morning by you screaming your head off. He jumped up (dad instincts already kicking in huh) tripping over his blanket that wrapped around his foot, looked at you. And could smell it before he could get there. Oof.

After he finished changing you, he walked downstairs cradling you in his arms, that engulfed your tiny body. Your head resting in the crook of his arm.

He fed you while sitting at the couch, he thought, might as well stay up. He'll probably just be woken up by you anyways 😆

You fell asleep in his arms not long after. And he swung his head back, closing his eyes. And fell asleep on accident. And a few hours later, he woke up to you once again, screaming your head off.

once your eyes fell upon his, you calmed down immediately. Making a small happy noise. Making him smile.

He had ordered some clothes for you online. And now that the baby carrier thingy was there, he could now bring you into public. He was nervous given that paparazzi follow his every move. But he didn't really care if they saw him with you, you were his.

He went out with just you in his arms, and came back with tons of bags full of clothing.

He then went ahead and put a car seat in place, along with a mirror so he could see you if he was driving. Which he wouldn't be doing for a while.

+•°+*°•+

He had took time off of stark Industries for a few months, so he now worked at home.

After two months of having your presence in tonys home, you were both inseparable. Tony couldn't do anything without you because he was hooked, and you couldn't do anything without him because you were only two months old.

The first time you sat up, he was so proud of you. Same for when you first rolled over, but his favorite achievement you had made so far has got to be when you first giggled 🤭

At seven months you began to crawl. (I know that's kind of early but i started crawling early and i know almost nothing about babies so..)

You had been sitting up, playing with tony when he scooted away from you, you gave him a look and leaned on your hands. You pushed you knees up and started army crawling to tony. Bouncing yourself with your arms.

He gasped and cheered you on. "Come on baby, come to daddy, aaaaahh, you got this sweetheart, come on" when you reached him he scooped you into his arms, smothering you with kisses.

Then his kisses became tickles, he pulled away from you and put his hand on your stomach and began to wiggle them all around.

You started giggling, which fell into deep baby belly laughter when he blew a giant raspberry right above your belly button.

You, only being seven months, couldn't do anything but wait for him to stop. Which he probably won't do anytime soon given that he loves your laughter 🥰

At 11 months old, tony went back to stark Industries. He had made a very large portion of his office dedicated to you.

Toys everywhere, there were a few books, he had that "transparent crib" in there as well. Which doubled as a playpen for you, mainly soft toys like stuffed animals and such were in there.

Many times pepper stopped a meeting mid way through, just to give you to tony. You had been screaming your head off but the second you were in tonys arms you calmed down immediately.

He would continue the meeting with you clung to him. Wrapping your arms around him, your head resting in the crook of his neck.

When you celebrated your first birthday, tony was having very mixed emotions, he loved you, and was so happy to see you made it this far. But he missed the days with his baby, and he wanted them back. He missed feeding you while you rested in the crook of his arm. Or rocking you to sleep while singing to you.

He is definitely the guy who throws magnificent parties that were long and big. But for his baby girls first birthday he only invited Rhody, pepper, and happy.

Watching everyone singing happy birthday and seeing you smothering cake and frosting all over yourself was one of the best times of his life. And he would never forget it.

+•°+*°•+

A/N: i might do another Dad!Tony stark x baby!daughter!reader cause it's so fluffing cute! And here are the few things I forgot while writing this

Tags

@animealways // @white-wolf-buckaroo // @tonystark-au // @zebralover //

[wosoluver]

Not good at saying goodbyes.

part 4/4 - previous.

Lena Oberdorf x reader.

Lena Oberdorf Masterlist

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

The match day came around. You were glad to be in the starting line-up. Last few days had been a little less insufferable as you tried going back to your routine.

You had been playing great. But not enough to make sure the team scored. As everyone started feeling a little desperate over time running out, you all gathered in the goal area, after managing a corner kick. As the referee gave the go ahead, you all jumped, trying to score a header.

You didn't know if you had miscalculated your actions or if someone else was at fault for it, but your head had hardly collided with another player's.

You instantly fell to the ground. You tried to say something, but your vision had quickly blurred turning black, and there was an awful ringing in your ears.

You had fallen unconscious.

"Y/N! Can you hear me?" Georgia tried to keep as calm as possible, like a captain should.

"Get out of my fucking way! Y/N? Are you okay? Y/N!" no one had ever seen Lena like this. Not in Wolfsburg, not at the national team.

She pushed everyone in her way to kneel right next to you.

"Y/N! Call the medics, the damn medics! Why are they not here yet?"

"Obi calm down! They're here." Lea said while holding her best friend back as you were being put on the stretcher.

"Hey, I'm here! I'm here, I love you...okay?"

she wiggled out of Lea's grip, as she walked, holding your hand as they carried you out of the field.

"Lena!" - they pulled her in a hug, as a small tear ran down her cheek. "You need to concentrate, we only have 25 minutes left. I need you here."

No words came out of her. All she could do was nod.

Twenty-five minutes had never seemed so long. She rant to the locker room to get showered and changed, so she could follow you, wherever you were.

"Do you know where they've taken her?" she asked Giulia. She would definitely know.

"Yes. Everyone is going back to the hotel. We can uber there."

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

"I'm so sorry. I was so stupid. When I saw you laying unconscious, I was so desperate, I couldn't lose you again." she said sitting on a chair next to you. You were laying down, eyes closed. "I has devastated when you left. I celebrated your birthday every year, made my mom make a cake and all. Until about 14, then it started feeling terrible. So I stopped. I insisted on setting up your stocking for christmas and-"

"You still haven't watched the Hannah Montana movie. I know." you whispered out as best as you could.

"Your awake!"

"Have been since before you got here."

"You were pretending?"

"No, I was napping, they gave me some meds for the headache. They're only waiting for the scan and test results to come back, so they can discharge me. Just a mild concussion."

"Did you just say 'just'? You blacked out! It could have been so much worse!"

"But it wasn't! Do I have a bruise?"

"No. I mean yes. Don't panic."

"Lena-"

"It's Obi."

"Obi, I'm sorry about everything. I was such a foolish child. I've regretted that every single day since then. You won't lose me this time."

"I know. And I'm sorry for the way I have been acting. I've missed you so much. You have no idea. So much has happened."

"I tried my best to keep up with everything. So, national team's best young player huh?"

"And you! Playing for the best team in the world! Also you clearly play like a spaniard."

"I can't tell if that's a good thing or not."

"It's both. At least you remember the same plays we used to do."

"Excuse me?" the doctor said as he walked in. "Your results are back. You're good. I'll discharge you, but you'll have to take it easy. Not playing or training for two days, just for caution. Also don't recommend you drive. I'll prescribe you medication for the headache you'll definitely have and you have to come in again tomorrow afternoon, for a check. So I can clear you, definitively."

"Okay then, thank you."

"No problem, see you tomorrow."

You both left the room to meet with Giulia in the waiting area.

"Ah good to see you two getting along."

"Thank you for coming too."

"No problem, do you remember anything?"

"Not really anything after hitting my head, until I woke up here."

"You should have seen Lena! 'Please don't leave, I love you!'. No one believed their eyes."

"Awn said you loved me?"

"No I didn't, Giulia shut it!"

"She did! She held your hand all the way out of the field. Even cried a little."

"That's cute. Thank you for being there." you said looking deep into her eyes. As she gave you a reassuring nod.

"Who won the game after all?"

"Not us. But it's fine, we're still winning the championship."

"I can't believe I won't be able to fly back with the team."

"I'll stay over too. Tomorrow is day off anyways." said Obi.

"Well were arrived at the hotel." said Giulia grabbing our attention.

Your bestfriend made sure to walk you to your room. But before she could walk away, you stopped her.

"Do you want to have a sleepover?"

──✩₊⁺⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧──

Thank you for this great request! Hope you enjoyed. Sorry for taking so long on the last part 🩷

[to-the-stars8]

Reviving Love

Jason Todd x Reader Chapters AO3

Chapter 8

Oh, my life is changing every day, in every possible way…

When Jason approached your door he heard that familiar song that brought back two vivid memories. 

The first memory was the day he was supposed to help the art club paint the background for the school play. When he had walked into the auditorium with a basket of supplies, Bruce had insisted he bring it, and the song had been blaring full blast with a chorus of out-tune voices singing long. Yours’ among them. As he approached the stage, he finally saw you. You were knelt next to a huge wood tree, paintbrush in hand, and singing along to the lyrics. 

And, oh, my dreams, it’s never quite as it seems—Never quite as it seems

He remembered suddenly feeling flush and stumbling to get all the words out of his mouth. All at once, he just found you so incredibly pretty. 

The second time he had heard that song was his first year of high school, the autumn right before he died. It was homecoming and, after some begging since he was technically grounded, Bruce had let him go. Jason made a point not to tell you so it could be a surprise when he showed up. He found you standing off to the side looking heartbroken. When your eyes met it felt like one of those stupid high school romance movies. Where the room stopped and was drowned in a pink light with roses. When you kissed him he remembered how your breath smelled like cinnamon and your eyes sparkling in the lights. 

Now, as he stood at your front door, he felt that same rush of feelings that made everything dizzy. Luckily, when you answered it brought back some of the senses he had lost while reminiscing. As you welcomed him in, the song still played. 

I know I’ve felt like this before, but now I’m feelin’ it even more—Because it came from you...

“I’m sorry,” You said, walking past him to turn off the speaker. “I was a little lost in my tunes.”

“No worries, I like that song,” Jason admitted. 

You turned to him, smiling. “You do?”

“Yup. I…danced with my prom date to that song.” It was a stretch of the truth, but the last thing he wanted was to connect the dots any further.

“Oh! I danced with my homecoming date to that song, too! I guess it’s pretty popular at school functions,” You laughed and motioned him to the kitchen.

That had been the first time you had referred to him, well the younger him anyway. When he entered the kitchen, you were leaning over a pot of some boiling pasta. Next to it was some sauce that he could only assume you had made from scratch with all the spices, herbs, and other things cluttering the counter. 

“Do you mind trying some of this?” You asked, turning to look at him with a spoon in your hand. 

Nodding, he stepped closer and put his lips to the spoon. It was awful, and he found it hard to tell you it sucked—Unfortunately, his face gave away his feelings. You laughed and it was beautiful. 

“I admit, I’m not the greatest of cooks,” You said, putting the spoon down. “Do you cook?”

“I do, so maybe I could give you some pointers?”

You grinned. “Please?”

Everything you did was so sweet, and he was sure you weren’t even doing it on purpose. With every mistake you made or everyone he made, you laughed it off. You made the whole situation of essentially being the worst cook ever into something fun. You were kind enough to open your home to him, the worst person alive.  

You were inching another forkfull of pasta towards his mouth, and, before he even entertained the idea of taking a bite, he said, “You know, if you keep feeding me, I’ll just keep coming back.”

The way you smiled gave away that he had said something good. Bashfully, you responded, “Well, what if I was trying to do that? Have you come back, I mean.”

Instead of saying anything, Jason took a bite of the pasta as he wiggled his eyebrows up and down at you. You took the hint and looked away so he wouldn’t see your blush. As you stirred the pasta a few more times, you wondered if he could hear how loud your heart was beating. You felt like an awkward teenager again. 

“Um, we should eat,” You said, not sure what else to do as you moved around Jason to get to the bowls in the cabinet. “Or else I’ll be spending all night forking food into your mouth.”

“I wouldn’t complain—Hold on, let me get those,” He said, reaching above you to grab the bowls on the top shelf. He put one hand on the counter next to you, encasing you in, and pressing right up against your back to reach for the plate. As you sucked in a breath, you could smell him. Jason smelled of cigarette smoke and mint, an odd but welcoming combination. 

As he put the bowls down, Jason stopped as you turned around. He hadn’t realized just how close you were, only mere inches from your lips, and he could have swooped down to seal in his feelings. Yet, he didn’t. You looked up through your lashes, eyes going to his lips, but made no move to kiss him. 

“I should…” You trailed off, hoping he would do something. 

A quick image flashed in Jason’s mind, one with you bent over the counter and him whispering just how pretty you were into your ear. As soon as the image came into his mind, he backed off. Smacking his face lightly when he turned away, he pulled his thoughts from his little head. He couldn’t get over how shallow it was to think of you in such a way, especially when couldn’t take that final step. It was too much, and he was terrified to be a disappointment to you since he had little to no experience.

You didn’t let him get away this time, though. You stepped around him, your fingers gingerly pushing his cheek to look at you, before stepping closer to him. He could feel your body press against his, and he had to think of every disgusting thing he had ever seen to not get hard. He tried focusing on the music he had insisted you turn on. This time, you looked down at his lips and then back up at his eyes, wanting him to know how you felt. 

“I know,” You began, and Jason could smell just how sweet you were. “You want to take things slow, and I respect it—but, please, don’t tease me like this.”

“I…” Jason tried to find some excuse, but he couldn’t. Quickly, he said, “I’m sorry.”

You grinned, leaning up to press a ghost of a kiss to his cheek. “I hope this is okay?”

“Yes,” He breathed. 

You smiled as you pulled away just enough to remember himself. You reached up, eyes not breaking away from his to make sure no lines were being crossed, to fix a bit of his shirt that had become wrinkled. “Do you think I’ll bite?”

“Maybe, can never be too sure in this city.”

You giggled. “I promise you I won’t. Unless you ask.”

Jason smiled and he saw you blush. He could do this, he thought, he could be with you. Maybe, he could figure out how to be good enough for you, too. In the background, he could hear Dreams playing again. 

Then I open up and see the person falling here is me—A different way to be.

[wol-fica]

if you are taking requests can i make a request where the reader and jenna ortega play a video game or watch a movie together and in the middle of the game or movie the reader kisses jenna and they spend the rest of the night together (both are already dating)

YES PLS TY TY MUAH

gonna write like sonic rn

————————————

-𝕊𝕨𝕖𝕖𝕥 ℂ𝕙𝕖𝕖𝕜𝕤-

pairings - jennaortega x fem!reader

summary - you spend the night at jenna’s and she decides to make you watch scream 5 with her [fem! reader]

warnings - slight angst, pure fluff, making out, jenna is a softy here, y’all can fight me later ;) not proofread

an - who’s ready for scream 6 btw, 2023 boutta be a lit year ong ong

———

Normally when you would spend the night at your girlfriends house, it would be peaceful and full of kisses; that was not the case tonight.

You were not a fan of scary movies, in any form. The last horror movie you watched was The Conjuring and you ended up pissing your pants. So how you ended up seated on the couch about to watch Scream 5 was beyond you.

“Jenna, love, can we not watch this?” You pleaded as your girlfriend proceeded to rent the movie on Amazon Prime.

Now, you weren’t opposed to seeing Jenna on screen, but you really didn’t like seeing her all bloody and dead on screen; from what you knew about Ghostface, he kills a lot.

“Cmon Y/N, it’s just one movie.” She replied whilst sliding back into the comfort of your arms after paying for the movie.

“It’s a scary movie. I don’t like scary!”

Jenna sighed and looked up at you, putting on her best puppy dog eyes. She always knew that if she did that, you would give into anything that she asked of you.

“Pleeeeaaassseeee.” She whined, leaning up to press a soft kiss to the underside of your jaw.

You stared at her, contemplating your response. You could either say yes, and have nightmares for the next few weeks, or say no and get the cold shoulder for eternity. You opted for the first option.

“Fine, but I blame you if I can’t sleep tonight.”

She squealed in excitement and grabbed the remote to press play, bouncing in your lap while she did. The intro to the movie came on and you knew you’d be in for a wild ride.

—time skip—

Wild ride was an understatement for the most part. You had screamed, whined, shed a few tears, and even had to leave the room for a moment at a certain scene.

Currently, you were sat on the couch as the movie was paused on sheriff walking outside. The faint glow of the screen illuminated your blank face as your girlfriend laughed at a video she took of you screaming like a child.

“It was so high-pitched, oh my god!” She wheezed, wiping away a tear of laughter.

“Glad you found my fear amusing.” You snapped, turning away from her.

“Aw baby im sorry.” Jenna said, throwing her phone onto the table so she could give you her full attention.

“Hmph.”

“Y/N I wasn’t trying to make fun of you.” She said, now straddling you to try and see your face.

A funny trait about you was that you were incredibly stubborn. Your sarcasm plus your inability to be bold has strung up your childish behavior of not wanting to give into whatever is throw your way.

“Baby, can you look at me?” Jenna tried again, attempting to turn your face.

You obliged but kept a stern look in your eyes as she smiled warmly at you.

“You know I would never mock you for being afraid of something.” She said softly, twirling a piece of your hair between her fingers.

“I know, but you know that I hate being scared. Let alone seeing you get stabbed like nine times!” You complained, completely forgetting about being mad.

“It wasn’t real sweet cheeks, it’s just a movie.” Jenna cooed, now caressing your face as a way to soothe you.

You whined in defeat, pouting while Jenna just giggled at you. She paused for a moments, leaning in so your noses were touching. The faint smell of her breath hit your senses, filling up your sinus’ with the scent of spear mint.

Soon enough, her lips were on yours as she pushed you into the couch. Your mouths locked together, teeth tugging at lips and tongues forcing into the others mouth. Your little make out session was going smoothly until you heard the sound of a ringtone going off. Jenna pulled away to see that she was getting a call, but before she could answer you took it and hung up.

“Wha-.” You cut Jenna off mid sentence with a kiss.

“I don’t wanna take any chances.”

—————-