#ARGH!!!!!
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omfg … 🫣
#mike faist#mike faist pics#challengers#challengers movie#art donaldson#i need to touch him so badly#he literally looks like a painting#took the name art literally i see#mike faist is art#i’m FERAL#ARGH!!!!!
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“Dearest, your little heart is wounded; think me not cruel because I obey the irresistible law of my strength and weakness; if your dear heart is wounded, my wild heart bleeds with yours. In the rapture of my enormous humiliation I live in your warm life, and you shall die—die, sweetly die—into mine. I cannot help it; as I draw near to you, you, in your turn, will draw near to others, and learn the rapture of that cruelty, which yet is love; so, for a while, seek to know no more of me and mine, but trust me with all your loving spirit.”
doodle of laura from carmilla (1872) because it is october!!!
#toxic yuri this toxic yuri that GO READ CARMILLA!!! ITS OCTOBER!!#theyre codependent one must die for the other to survive theyre in love theyre disgusted by each other#bloodlust and love and regular lust are all the same to carmilla and its eating her alive#what if lesbian desire was reserved for predatory violence but in that context was regarded as natural. what then.#ARGH!!!!!#put in tags if youve read it cause i feel so alone. holding my victorian vampire yuri in the corner#art#my art#carmilla#sheridan le fanu#carmilla (1872)#lesbian vampires#how do i tag this.#kinktober2023#kinktober
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rant about Gabriel to me I need to understand him
im going to format this like you've never seen the show, just in case you haven't, so if you have just bare with me
gabriel is a bit of an enigma. for the first two and a half episodes he shows up in, he's not even known as gabriel. he's on screen as 'the trickster' and is masquerading as one. (tricksters in spn canon are powerful demigod creatures of myth that can alter reality how they want, normally using their powers to play deadly pranks on malicious humans in ironic ways. i.e mauling someone who tests products on animals via a sewer alligator)
the reason he's doing this as a self proclaimed "witness protection" method is because he's in hiding, pretending to be a trickster to hide from his family; which is heaven since he's the archangel gabriel. surprise surprise. this is revealed in the episode 'changing channels', (season four) which is i believe the best ranked episode on the entire show by the audience and one of my favorites. 'mystery spot' (season three) is another one he stars in (as rhe trickster, not gabriel. we still dont know that), and i think it's the second highest ranked. and 'tall tales' (season two) is the first one he shows up in which is also very highly ranked.
gabriel has a habit of faking his death a lot to escape responsibility, which he does in the episode 'hammer of the gods' (season five [?] i think) after being "stabbed" by lucifer so he doesn't have to really stick around and watch his family (lucifer and michael) fight. but we don't know that it was a fake out for nearly eight seasons. (there is an instance where he shows up again in season nine but that was a fake out and not the real him). in 'hammer of the gods' we also find out that gabriel really had gone all in with his so called witness protection while pretending to be a trickster; so much so that most of the mythological world/pretty much anyone but cas sam and dean knows him as the actual god of tricksters, loki, and not by his true name. later on when he comes back in season thirteen we find out that's because the real loki offered to share the same face with gabriel back when he first came to earth wayyyyyyy long ago to help him out. and when we meet loki later when gabriels trying to kill him for selling him off to one of the princes of hell asmodeus (i'll get into that) it's basically just the actor richard speight jr playing two roles at once. if that makes any sense. one of my favorite episodes, although i think that's just because i hadn't really seen gabriel in months and was over excited. i'll have to see if the hype holds up on my rewatch
but okay, for some backstory on the whole being sold thing, after gabriel faked his death in 'hammer of the gods', he ran off to some island to get in contact with loki and his kids (think fenrir. spn uses real mythological names and bloodlines as side plots sometimes) to go dark again. loki pretends to entertain the idea and let's gabriel play poker with hookers for a few days (gabe has also stared in a porno before and enjoys eating candy even though angels never get hungry. he's fun that way) before betraying him and basically selling him off as a slave to a prince of hell, who locks him away for hundered (thousands maybe?) of years, constantly draining his archangel grace just enough to not leave gabe powerless, but also enough to torture him horribly. it's awful, and all explained in the episode 'unfinished buisness' (season thirteen) which is all about him enacting revenge on loki and the tricksters kids. but the takeaway is that the first time we see gabe after season five, he's a completely different person. almost like a scared animal. if the animal has had its mouth sewn shut by a demon, that is.
anyways, sam and dean and cas help revert him back to his usual self, and he runs away from his problems for a few episodes, before finally confronting them and dying for real this time at the hands of an alertnate world version of his brother michael a few episodes later. the later seasons writing was so fucked up in my opinion, and the way gabriel died was done so wrong, but i think that's because im biased. frowns
my explination of him does no justice. he's a smug, silly, tricky, multi layered, funny son of a bitch that has fuck ass smile where his eyes crinkled at the corner and i. oughhh. i love him. urgh. yeah
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MERRY CHRISTAS!!! HAPPY HOLIDAYSSS
Secret santa i did of zoro and chopper dressed as the grinch and max :DD
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x_X
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Standard time official review: 👎
#ARGH!!!!!#been soooo sad (boooo) last few days and like Convinced With 0 Evidence That Everybody Is Mad At Me (silly)#and I'm 99% sure it's the time shift screwing my sleep + missing Tha Sun in the evenings (booo)#planting my face on day spectrum lamp again until I feel better I keep Forgetting
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finished my rewatch of atsv. it’s so good. god why is it that good. also i still hate miguel. peace and love
#the canon event scene is sooooo good to me#like miles realization over what they are willing to let happen…. all for the sake of the canon… argh#and just how literally all of the adults there failed him so completely. well not all of them#i guess. it comes back to what rio was saying to him. that others won’t look out for him like she and jeff do#ARGH!!!!!
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havent decided if im gonna put myself through s3 of star trek picard or not ............
#mike was right ..... s2 was like finding the body in stand by me#a perfect analogy to the show tbh#s1 wasnt that great but s2 just got me so frustrated and down rip#im rewatching tng atm and every time i remember stpicard is a thing i die a lil inside#bc ill be watching tng and suddenly be like hmm yea this is all for nothing isnt it#ARGH!!!!!#i probably shouldnt watch s3 bc of how sad s2 made me rip but idk im Curious#if rlm do a re:view on it i might end up watching the show to be on the same age as them tbh#personal
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slept fucking abysmally event 10 dead 35 injured
#my first mistake was going to bed past 4 am cause i lost track of time#but after that i kept WAKING UP RANDOMLY#ARGH!!!!!
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not to sound like a boomer, but I need some people to learn how to write emails in a semi-professional (at the very least) format so you're not cold emailing a business/potential employer/any other stranger about formal matters in the exact same way you'd DM a close friend on instagram
the formality/language can loosen up in the email chain once you've established a rapport and you match the other person if they're being less formal, but please don't have the very first email you send a stranger be written in all lowercase ultra-casual sms slang with no greeting or signature and a billion emojis
#this sounds like a 'argh kids these days doing [insert exaggerated story they don't actually do in reality]' kind of thing#except that I've gotten soooo many emails like this#there's a reason that I don't have my DMs open on any socmed and it's bc they attract people getting way too casual/parasocial immediately#and forcing people to write out an email both filters out 90% of weird impulse messages and also throws them out of that casual headspace#except that I can actively tell when this fails and someone is treating emails as if they're the same thing as DMs
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"Christians think you can fix mental illness by praying" did you try though.
PLEASE READ THE TAGS FOR THIS JOKE
#Obviously no prayer won't immediately make you feel better#You also have to put in effort#BUT it is incredibly comforting knowing that the creator of literally everything loves you and is trying to help you#“I wanna kill myself because I don't see a reason to live anymore”#Bestie talk to God. He will give you the energy to keep going until it gets better and then He'll still be there#He'll always be there to help you if you just ask#I was doing really horribly in 2023 but I started getting better when I started consistently praying#And I'm still not doing amazing but I feel on average calmer and happier because I trust that God is there and that He'll take care of me#I know he has a plan for me. The pain I'm feeling now is temporary and later down the line I'll do something great#Even if I don't then there's still Heaven#ARGH!!!!!#If anyone wants to talk about God hmu!!! I love talking about Him!! He's so cool!!!#Oops tags got a little off topic#That's okay. This is my blog and my post. I make the rules
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An enabler with 3 alimonies.
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between your teeth definitelynottober - day 7
#pearlescentmoon#double life#double life smp#trafficblr#my art#never drew dl pearl srsly i dont think. so i thought tdy was a good chance to do it >:D#argh i need to do bg more tho maybe tmr hmmmmm#definitelynottober#definitelynottober2024#I KEEP FORGETTIGN TO PUT THE ACTUAL TAGS BUT I REMEMBERED JUST NOW LOL
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comic I did last year that I thought was too self indulgent to post ever anywhere but .... here we r...
#one piece#sanji#portgas d ace#acesan#me drawing anything that's more sweet than funny ARGH IM CRINGE IM CRINGE IM CRINGE IM CR#i tried fixing some stuff up but the art is still a little busted to me . its okay . Ask me if i GAF.#comic
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the stones are in order
#mcsm#minecraft story mode#mcsm fanart#mcsm petra#mcsm olivia#mcsm axel#sopuuart#my doodles#finally got their designs down properly!! specifically liv and axel bc i don’t draw them enough argh#in other words i challenged myself to draw a full post without any jesse or lukas#i failed btw. they are kissing in the draft layers <3
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