#ANYWAYS I HOPE THIS SUFFICES AND ALSO I AM SORRY

[thevoiceofdesertbluffs]

i have voted!

may i request for a "i voted" stamp or sticker that's carlos specific?

Now. I need you to first know, graphic design is NOT my passion... HOWEVER

I, to the best of my ability, have made one! I uh. I hope this satisfies DGFSGH

(bonus doodle under the cut)

+ here's a really shit 1am doodle of carlos as an apology kbhjfb (tagging @sexiestpodcastcharacter because propaganda-ish? moreso something for the carlos side), hope you dont mind fjshgbs)

[longagoitwastuesday]

So so indebted to u for posting those lovely illustrations from Cyrano <333 & even more so for yr tags!! I'm completely in love w yr analysis, please feel free to ramble as long as u wish! Browsing through yr Cyrano de Bergerac tag has given me glimpses of so many adaptations & translations I'd never heard of before! I'll be watching the Solès version next, which I have only discovered today through u ^_^ As for translations, have u read many/all of them? I've only encountered the Renauld & Burgess translations in the wild, & I was curious to hear yr translation thoughts that they might guide my decision on which one I buy first (not necessarily Renauld or Burgess ofc). Have a splendid day & sorry for the likespam! 💙

Sorry for the delay. Don't mind the likespam, I'm glad you enjoyed my tags about Cyrano, and that they could contribute a bit to a further appreciation of the play. I loved it a lot, I got obsessed with it for months. It's always nice to know other people deeply love too that which is loved haha I hope you enjoy the Solès version, it may well be my favourite one!

About translations, I'm touched you're asking me, but I don't really know whether mine is the best opinion to ask. I have read... four or five English translations iirc, the ones I could find online, and I do (and especially did, back when I was reading them) have a lot of opinions about them. However, nor English nor French are my first languages (they are third and fourth respectively, so not even close). I just read and compare translations because that's one of my favourite things to do.

The fact is that no translation is perfect, of course. I barely remember Renauld's, but I think it was quite literal; that's good for understanding the basics of the text, concepts and characters, but form is subject, and there's always something that escapes too literal translations. Thomas and Guillemard's if I recall correctly is similar to Hooker's in cadence. It had some beautiful fragments, some I preferred over Hooker's, but overall I think to recall I liked Hooker's more. If memory serves, Hooker's was the most traditionally poetic and beautiful in my opinion. Burgess' is a whole different thing, with its perks and drawbacks.

Something noticeable in the other translations is that they are too... "epic". They do well the poetic, sorrowful, grief stricken, crushed by regrets aspects of Cyrano and the play in general, but they fall quite short in the funny and even pathetic aspects, and that too is key in Cyrano, both character and play. Given the characteristics of both languages, following the cadence of the French too literally, with those long verses, makes an English version sound far too solemn at times when the French text isn't. Thus Burgess changes the very cadence of the text, adapting it more to the English language. This translation is the one that best sets the different moods in the play, and as I said before form is subject, and that too is key: after all, the poetic aspect of Cyrano is as much true as his angry facet and his goofy one. If Cyrano isn't funny he isn't Cyrano, just as he wouldn't be Cyrano without his devotion to Roxane or his insecurities; Cyrano is who he is precisely because he has all these facets, because one side covers the other, because one trait is born from another, because one facet is used as weapon to protect the others, like a game of mirrors and smoke. We see them at different points through the play, often converging. Burgess' enhances that. He plays with the language itself in form and musicality, with words and absences, with truths masking other truths, with things stated but untold, much like Cyrano does. And the stage directions, poetic and with literary value in their own right in a way that reminded me of Valle Inclán and Oscar Wilde, interact with the text at times in an almost metatextual dimension that enhances that bond Cyrano has with words, giving them a sort of liminal air and strengthening that constant in the play: that words both conceal and unveil Cyrano, that in words he hides and words give him away.

But not all is good, at all. Unlike Hooker, Burgess reads to me as not entirely understanding every facet of the characters, and as if he didn't even like the play all that much, as if he had a bit of a disdainful attitude towards it, and found it too mushy. Which I can understand, but then why do you translate it? In my opinion the Burgess' translation does well bending English to transmit the different moods the French text does, and does pretty well understanding the more solemn, cool, funny, angry, poetic aspects of Cyrano, but less so his devotion, vulnerability, insecurities and his pathetism. It doesn't seem to get Roxane at all, how similar she is to Cyrano, nor why she has so many admirers. It does a very poor job at understanding Christian and his value, and writes him off as stupid imo. While I enjoyed the language aspect of the Burgess translation, I remember being quite angry at certain points reading it because of what it did to the characters and some changes he introduces. I think he did something very questionable with Le Bret and Castel-Jaloux, and I remember being incensed because of Roxane at times (for instance, she doesn't go to Arras in his version, which is a key scene to show just how much fire Roxane has, and that establishes several parallels with Cyrano, in attitude and words, but even in act since she does a bit what Cyrano later does with the nuns in the last act), and being very angry at several choices about Christian too. While not explicitly stated, I think the McAvoy production and the musical both follow this translation, because they too introduce these changes, and they make Christian as a character, and to an extent the entire play, not make sense.

For instance, once such change is that Christian is afraid that Roxane will be cultured (McAvoy's version has that infamous "shit"/"fuck" that I detest), when in the original French it's literally the opposite. He is not afraid she will be cultured, he is afraid she won't, because he does love and appreciate and admires those aspects of her, as he appreciates and admires them in Cyrano. That's key! Just as Cyrano longs to have what Christian has, Christian wants the same! That words escape him doesn't mean he doesn't understand or appreciate them. The dynamics make no sense without this aspect, and Burgess (and the productions that directly or indirectly follow him) constantly erases this core trait of Christian.

Another key moment of Christian Burgess butchers is the scene in Arras in which Christian discovers the truth. Burgess writes their discussion masterfully in form, it's both funny and poignant, but it falls short in concept: when Cyrano tells him the whole discussion about who does Roxane love and what will happen, what they'll do, is academic because they're both going to die, Christian states that dying is his role now. This destroys entirely the thing with Christian wanting Roxane to have the right to know, and the freedom to choose, or to refuse them both. As much as Cyrano proclaims his love for truth and not mincing words even in the face of authority, Cyrano is constantly drunk on lies and mirages, masks and metaphors. It's Christian who wants it all to end, the one who wants real things, the one who wants to risk his own happiness for the chance of his friend's, as well as for the woman he loves to stop living in a lie. That is a very interesting aspect of Christian, and another aspect in which he is written as both paralleling and contrasting Cyrano. It's interesting from a moral perspective and how that works with the characters, but it's also interesting from a conceptual point of view, both in text and metatextually: what they hold most dear, what they most want, what most fulfills them, what they most fear, their different approaches to life, but also metatextually another instance of that tears/blood motif and its ramifications constant through the whole text. Erasing that climatic decision and making him just simply suicidal erases those aspects of Christian and his place in the Christian/Cyrano/Roxane dynamic, all for plain superficial angst, that perhaps hits more in the moment, but holds less meaning.

Being more literal, and more solemn, Hooker's translation (or any of the others, but Hooker's seems to love the characters and understand them) doesn't make these conceptual mistakes. Now, would I not recommend reading Burgess' translation? I can't also say that. I had a lot of fun reading it, despite the occasional anger and indignation haha Would I recommend buying it? I recommend you give an eye to it first, if you're tempted and can initially only buy one.

You can read Burgess' translation entirely in archive.com. You can also find online the complete translations of Renauld, Hooker and Thomas and Guillemard. I also found a fifth one, iirc, but I can't recall it right now (I could give a look). You could read them before choosing, or read your favourite scenes and fragments in the different translations, and choose the one in which you like them better. That's often what I do.

Edit: I've checked to make sure and Roxane does appear in Arras in the translation. It's in the introduction in which it is stated that she doesn't appear in the production for which the translation was made. The conceptualisation of Roxane I criticise and that in my opinion is constant through the text does stay, though.

[columboposting]

Ok update I would like to personally formally apologize to OP for writing a tag rant on this Joke Post nine months ago that got traction saying that this was a gross misreading of the text because I am currently watching an actual professionally made documentary about Dante with real academics saying that the Francesca section of the text is a commentary on the overwhelming power of love literature to make people cheat on their husbands if they take it too seriously so like, I still assert that Dante Did Not Say That but I appreciate that you're doing a bit about it and aren't dead serious like these fuckin guys

dante saying he thinks arthurian courtly romance is immoral irredeemable media bc reading about guinevere and lancelot would make women cheat on their husbands and go to hell for lust so funny. i would have blocked his tumblr

[hazzabeeforlou]

i had a question and i hope that it doesn’t sound rude. do you feel ashamed being in the fandom and being a shipper at 32? i ask because i am 27, and have been in the fandom since 2012, off and on. i haven’t rly been in it actively for the last two years or so, but when i want to come back, i feel embarrassed. i also don’t think i could handle the stress of it tbh! lol. i hope you are well <3

I was going to answer this yesterday but then remembered I had a 7 hour drive today and didn’t want to stay up later than I already was. Because I’m an adult, with (now one) previous multiple jobs, a pet, rent, vehicle, three post high school diplomas, and student loans, and there are many things in my life I get ashamed of, like when I answer “you too” when a cashier tells me thanks for shopping or when I let a whole bag of celery go bad in my fridge without ever cleaning or eating it. Shame? At my tax dollars funding death weapons and family members voting for strong men? Sure. Latent homophobic internalized shame from my upbringing? Yeah, sometimes.

But life is too fucking short to be embarrassed or hold shame about a FANDOM. Listen, I “ship” Johnlock, or Merthur, but Larry wasn’t a ship for me it was a discovery of queer joy. Like I’m so sorry but baby Larry was real. 100%, actually, seriously legit, like how else do you fucking explain any or all of that. We watched two boys fall in love with each other and okay we don’t know the devil or the details but we have how many albums and interviews, jokes made by media personalities etc, plus the fact that now, this many years later, their solo stuff is still haunted by a nauseating back and forth, these odd lyrical choices that are echoed in the other?

Yeah it’s not a ship. It’s a thing that happened, that we witnessed, and by virtue of it happening and us witnessing it something about gay love became dreamable, reachable, attainable, soft and puppy and exciting and wild. Their secret sign language and mimed blow jobs and jealous looks and touches when they thought there were no cameras, all those things made queerness not just something you saw on Glee. Not just something your parents talked about while wrinkling their nose up about ‘those people.’ It’s a generational thing, the world has moved on, we don’t NEED Larry anymore. And that’s okay. But we don’t need it because it happened. Not to be a brat but you exist in the context of all in which you live and what came before you.

And yeah, we wrote fics about highly characterized and publicized versions of Larry, often inserting our own traumas or fantasies, creating a kind of gay mythos around this witnessed event from the periphery, from the lens of the consumer, the only lens we have. But I’m not ashamed of that. You think stories are only ever written about people that don’t exist? At some point you have to acknowledge that in our world, celebrities are the deities of our popular imagination. I could write a thesis, but before I get into the weeds, suffice to say Harry and Louis have created a world of what can be, unburdened by what has been.

Yk? Anyways. Hope this made you feel better. And hope you come back to visit from time to time. I’ll be here.

[toruro]

I'm new here hehe but I'm HOOKED to your stuff istg I've been reading it everytime I get some break sksnksdn aNYWAYS- 🍒 or 🍑 person in svt cause for some reason I'd love to see some of the members losing their shit when they're pushed into their s/o's boobs while hugging lmao

I'm so sorry if this reaches you when you're busy please take your time to write and rest <33

who in svt — tits or ass

a/n: thank u for the kind words, i'm glad u like my writing! i am slightly busy rn BUT this was a fun little thing so i figured i would take some much needed free time to write this c: i'm not sure if this is exactly what u wanted but i hope it will suffice!

tits

jeonghan: finds it so cute the way he can get you all sensitive from just playing with your tits a little, and it's easily one of his favorite things to do from just your reactions alone

jun: no1 boob man of svt easily. soapy titties are a curse—he can never stop thinking about them, and is probably the reason why more than half of your showers are with him ...

dokyeom: they're just so soft and warm and comforting and...extremely hot. dokyeom would love playing with your tits and

minghao: he likes ur tits the most because he loves playing with your nipples and just watching the way you writhe and moan under him

seungkwan: he's claiming best ass in the relationship so his partner can't outdo him...plus he just loves resting his head on your tits after a long day

ass

joshua: a bit of a wild card but he just LOVES the curve of your ass in a pretty little dress like i swear it'll turn him on so much he might just force you two to stay home on your date night so he can bent you over the kitchen counter

wonwoo: is more obsessed with your ass than you let on...but you definitely figure it out when he is insistent on spanking you nonstop in doggy style. just loves the way he can have his hand print on your ass and !!!

jihoon: loves the way your ass bounces when he's fucking into you rough, and similar to wonwoo, he loves spanking, especially as a punishment for you

vernon: reverse cowgirl is his favorite thing ever sorry not sorry

both

seungcheol: literally loves every single part of you. he is obsessed with spanking your ass but also has a hyperfixation on having your tits in his mouth so he basically can't choose which one he likes more

soonyoung: if it bounces he likes it. boobs or butt, he doesn't care as long as he gets to watch it shake when he pounds into you

mingyu: if it he can squeeze it is going in his hand. whether you're in doggy style or missionary, you can guess that either will be under his firm grip

chan: as long as it's you, he doesn't care lmfao

[sleeplessdreamer14]

I am in love with your headcanon for Monkey king(2023) especially the kiss reaction headcanons. What do you mean he gets “fidgety”???😳😳😳

Does he take the kiss up a notch??? Does he like pull Y/N deeper into the kiss??? Does he take the kiss much further because he didn’t know what to do and something awakens in him??? I MUST know or I might die!!!😫

IM SO SORRY THESE TOOK SO LONG 🥲 anyway, there we go!

when I said “fidgety” I meant he’s not sure what exactly to do with his hands

Monkey may have been enough of a menace to piss off almost all the gods in China’s three major religions, but he’s not an absolute ruffian

the first time, his hands actually slumped to his sides as he relaxed into the kiss

when you pulled away he was a little bit dazed for a moment before pulling himself back together

as it happens more and more often, Monkey gradually learns what to do

starting off tame, placing a hand on your cheek or shoulder

before graduating to putting both hands around your waist/shoulders or holding your face to deepen the kiss

and when Monkey gets real comfy, he’ll put his hands around your waist and dip you a lil bit

now it’s your turn to be love dazed when you two part

he also likes it when you run your hands over his hair when you kiss him

hope this shall suffice

[thecapricunt1616]

Hello everyone! I am truly sorry for not posting as of late. I’ve been dealing with mental health stuff, also my laptop got broken :( So it hasn’t been as easy to write. I do have my iPad/wireless keyboard, but it just isn’t as comfortable to write on / I worry that the format will look like shit. I do feel poorly though because all of my moots have been writing a lot lately, and my blog has been so dry! I am really trying to get my mental health in check so obtaining a job will be easier and in turn, my work will probably be (somewhat) better. I hope this suffices, though, for the time being. I promise I’m trying to get a new laptop just as soon as I can <3 I appreciate all of your patience with me :) I have never written for our darling prince Lip Gallagher before- but he has been making me fairly crazy lately, so I wanted to give my go at writing for him, I haven’t watched the college Lip ep’s in a while so I hope it’s alright - sorry if it��s not fully canon! Tell me how I did if you’d like! xoxo - Capri <3 :)

(Warnings - smut choking (consensual) unprotected PIV sex, not very edited or proof read bc im tired ❤️❤️❤️)

”Hump my fuckin leg one more time, I swear to god. If you don’t just sit in my fuckin’ lap, and behave y’not gonna like me. I told you, I have 3 more fuckin’ papers to grade- like a cat in fuckin’ heat” he grumbled, not looking up from the homework assignment he’d been grading for the professor he’d been working under.

You pouted, squeezing his thigh that you had been straddling and working your way up to fully dragging your swollen, needy cunt across his worn out denim beneath your flower printed panties. A frustrated huff leaved your lips, before connecting them with the warm, tobacco scented skin of his neck and planting a gentle kiss. “Wanna feel good, Lip. Y’bein mean” you said, voice quiet and laced with the neediness he couldn’t quite ignore, or deny.

“Jesus fucking Christ. Fine, Need a smoke anyway. But you want it so bad, you can fuckin’ get y’self off” he walked over to the dorm window, pushing it open to let out the smoke out and put a cigarette to his lips, lighting it and plopping down on the bed, popping the button of his jeans. You were sat there dumbly, jaw dropped at the fact that he didn’t put up more of a fight. ”You have until the end of this fuckin smoke. You gonna come do somethin’ er sit there lookin’ like a goddamn trout?” He teased.

You quickly got up, pushing him to lay down and tugging his cock just enough out of his jeans and boxers, spitting in your hand before beginning to stroke him quickly, thumbing over his sensitive tip and he grunted softly, smoke plooming out of his nose as he plucked the cigarette from between his lips. “see that fuckin wet stain you left on my jeans? Such a needy whore f’me yeah?” He mused, watching as you pumped him faster, mouth dropping slightly as he hardened in the pressure of your palm until he was throbbing.

”Only yours -“ your jaw falls slack as you ran the tip of his cock through your wet folds, gathering your arousal and using his tip to rub over your clit. His eyes nearly rolled back, putting the cigarette between his lips and taking another large drag. He looked down as you rutted your hips back and forth over his thick now throbbing length.

“Only half a cig left, kitten. You gonna get y’self off with it er’ just fuck around, ‘eh?” He asked impatiently. You rolled your eyes sassily, aligning him with your entrance and sitting back, a whimper leaving your throat since you hadn’t the time to get yourself fully ready for him and the stretch he provided was never anything you could adjust to no matter how many times you took it.

A small grunt left his throat, hips rutting up into you subconsciously a gasp left your throat as he shifted his hips forward, rutting into that most sensitive and spongey spot inside of you that made white stars form behind your lids and your thighs shake. You whine as your head fell back, hips trembling as you lifted yourself up and down over his cock. “Jesus- so fucking big….” You manage to get out, bringing a trembling hand down to play with your puffy, throbbing clit.

”Finally feel good? Hm? Little fuckin’ brat. Shoulda fucked your face instead mm? Bet you’d love that shit” he reached over and put out his mostly gone cigarette on the ash tray and you began furiously rolling your hips, worried he was gonna pull you off and tell you that it was time for him too get back to work.

”Yes- yes daddy, such a brat- your brat. Please- please let me finish- feel so good- please” you rambled, voice needy and begging. He huffed a nearly mocking chuckle, grabbing you by the throat and pushing you down onto the mattress. It wasn’t painful, it just cut off your blood flow just right to where there was this sweet, fuzzy feeling in your head, causing your vision to go slightly hazy around the edges.

“I’ve created a fuckin monster - huh? Addicted t’my cock now. Can’t even go 12 hours without gettin’ filled up.” He was practically speaking into your sweaty, flushed skin of your temple, His voice a gruff row grumble. He used his other hand to rut up your tshirt, palming your tit roughly and rolling your nipple between his fingers. You squeaked out, hips jerking at the motion which urged him deeper and made your eyes roll at the overstimulation.

”shit - like that, huh? You like that? When I pound you this fuckin’ deep?” He snapped his hips faster, short, sweet little ah-ah-ah squeaks being torn from your throat with each nearly punishing thrust. You nod quickly, looking up at him in awe stricken lust as you clench around him.

“Ohh are you gonna cum? Is my little fuckin brat gonna cum? Mmm? You gonna cum around my cock?” He taunts in the shell of your ear, the hand that was playing with your nipple sliding down to play with your clit as the other stated wrapped firmly around your throat. Your hips jerk, feet planting on the bed as your back arches while your body tries to escape the oncoming tidal wave of pleasure that was threatening to take over.

“Mmhmm. Y’gonna cum- feel you fuckin’ milking my cock- go ahead baby - let go” he goads as he stroked your twitching bud faster. You let out something akin to a sob, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes and breath hitching as your vision blurs out momentarily, body going slack other then your trembling thighs, and nails that were slapping and clawing at Lips back as he drives you through it, his thrusts becoming sloppier and harder at the feeling of you pulsating around him like a second heartbeat and your creamy white arousal seeping around him and covering his cock with each thrust.

“That’s fuckin it- that’s it kitten” he groaned, spreading out your pussy with a slack jaw, watching as his cock punched in and out of you, rutting against your g spot each and every time - in turn causing pathetic pleas for you weren’t sure what coming from your throat.

“Please what, baby- want me to fill you up? Hm? Need my cum drippin outta’ you after I fuck you to sleep here so I can finish my fuckin work in peace?” He coos mockingly, tugging you by your hair forcing you to look at him.

You sniffled, tears seeping from the corners of your eyes pathetically and drool dribbling down your chin from how he was fucking you so good your tongue had nearly fallen out of your mouth like some kind of puppy - “s-sorry- jus’love your- your cock” you hiccuped an over stimulated sob as he used his thumb abuse the nub further which in turn caused another strangled moan to leave your throat and head to fall back to the pillow.

“Awww I know Angel. You take it so well- like a good little toy” he mumbled into your skin, his words causing you to clench and dribble around him slightly, the raspiness of his voice mixed with the praise doing something to you you couldn’t quite explain.

“So good- so good daddy m’so good” you cry out as he fills you up, cock twitching and pulsing between your walls in the most delicious way. You gasped in delight, wrapping your legs tight around his hips and tugging your pelvis’ taut and comfortably, enjoying the feeling of being filled up to the hilt.

“Got shit t’do as much as I wanna live in your cunt, baby. Gotta get back at it” he kissed your forehead, grabbing a T shirt from his laundry pile and tossing it to you to clean yourself up as he fixed his jeans and went to sit back at his desk, leaving you well satiated

All be it a little sore and wanting post sex snuggles,

You win some, you lose some.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hey, I really appreciate your answering sex ed questions and was hoping you might be able to help me out. Sorry for the long tmi I'm about to give but I don't know how to ask this except by listing out everything relevant I can think of.

I'm afab (cis-ish in the sense I don't particularly see myself as a woman but don't bother trying to get other people not to, but that isn't really important here) in my mid 20s and a virgin, and I don't know much about sex drive but what I do makes me feel like maybe there's something off about mine? I used to consider myself bi ace until I realised I did feel some degree of physical attraction to women that I don't to men so now I call myself a lesbian but the attraction I feel is still very... vague? Like, I'll see a pretty woman and get some kind of rush of feeling, but it's not really a particularly physical feeling of arousal (though I am autistic so it could be I just don't recognise it as physical because of interoception difficulties), more like... sorry if this is an inappropriate metaphor but. More like the urge to pet a really cute cat. I've made out with women and it felt vaguely nice (certainly nicer than with men which I've also done but it was awkward and vaguely uncomfortable) but no more than that. I don't get anything from my physical partners biting down on my neck or nipples or other common erogenous zones though I feel like they expect me to, and kissing is kind of nice but kissing with tongue feels awful. I'm not sure if I'd ever actually want to have full on sex, the thought of letting someone near my sex organs sounds unpleasant. I sometimes masturbate by rubbing my clit and there's a moment that feels like a climax where it gets really hard and sensitive and I used to think that was an orgasm but reading your recent description of an orgasm I'm actually pretty sure I've never had one. I've never had the urge to stick anything in my vagina, only tried it because I heard if it causes pain it might be a cause for medical concern (it didn't cause pain - it felt kinda nice, not anything special though and certainly not something I'd do without prompting). When I masturbate there's only one specific non sexual scenario that gets me off (though maybe about once a year at most I can successfully get off to sexual scenarios with fictional characters but never with real people and it isn't as effective). I used to masturbate more than I do now (I know it dropping off suddenly can be a cause for medical concern but it wasn't sudden, just spikes of activity getting gradually shorter and rarer - I can think of months when I'd do it every night to fall asleep but those are very much outliers scattered across the years rather than my baseline, which is occasionally doing it absentmindedly while falling asleep but very rarely intensely and on purpose). I probably should have sought out more sex ed at some point but sex just never felt very important to me.

Anyway I guess my question is. Is all this normal? Am I actually ace after all? Do I just have a low sex drive? Is any of this cause for medical concern? Do you have any idea how I might be able to actually get an orgasm, if what I thought was that actually wasn't?

hi anon,

all of this is incredibly normal. what I'm hearing is that you kind of like kissing women and aren't particularly interested in sex? that's awesome. kissing women is great, strongly recommend, and if that's all you're interested in then that's just dandy. no need to pretend to enjoy anything just because a partner expect you to; a polite "no thanks" will suffice, followed by kicking your partner to the curb if they don't listen to the no.

whether or not you call yourself asexual is up to you, that's none of my business and I can't pick for you. there actually isn't a secret barcode hidden somewhere on your body that will reveal your Real True Sexuality, you can just pick whatever words you want that kind of get the gist at any given time. would calling yourself asexual feel nice or helpful to you in anyway? if so, awesome! does it not appeal to you at all? okie dokie! don't do that then.

literally nothing you have described sounds like something that would be cause for medical concern, unless I missed something that's regularly causing you any physical pain or discomfort.

I think focusing on orgasms isn't that important, actually, and you can actually just touch yourself in whatever way you want for as long as it feels good, and then stop when it doesn't!

[cherrysurf]

Coffee cake after dark| k. tsukishima x reader

chapter 1; strawberry shortcake

You owned a quaint tiny bakery snuggled in the city, business was steady and good. You’ve ran the bakery for about 3 years so far you loved every minute of it, buying the shop was such an amazing deal since you were able to live right above your shop, settling into such a big city at first was difficult since you were born on the countryside and hardly ever went into the city at first, but over time you grew to love the ambience of it all. Your bakery had it all though from the coffee to the smoothies, from the pastries to the ice cream. It was a lot yes but opening up your own shop made you feel accomplished and you loved your little life. What more could you want? Also Since being a night owl was one of your biggest “problems” according to your parents it actually became a great solution to your bakery. Many people loved to come in late at night for a sweet snack or simply just a quiet place to cram late assignments or finals. You met all different types of people, from late night workers, highschool students, college students and professors and people whose day actually started at 2am. It was something exhilarating each time you enjoyed meeting all kinds of people it was one of your favorite hobbies that came with your super cool job, that being said there was times and points in the night where it was completely dead, maybe one customer but that was it so now it was another slow thursday night at 10pm, the afternoon was pretty busy but you loved that. technically you were just sitting down behind the counter waiting for a customer and jotting a list down for supplies you needed on your laptop when you hear a bell ring letting you know someone had entered. You see a tall blonde figure with glasses and gym clothes, his hair was slightly damp and he looked very exhausted. You knew how to deal with customers who seemed out of it or extremely tired and maybe not in the mood, you always gave space and remained calm and quiet out of respect. You stand up from your chair and walk over to the register waiting for the blonde man to approach the counter. You smiled slightly at the sight of his glasses glaring from the lights above you both “hi, what can i get for you tonight?” you look up at him, “do you guys serve strawberry shortcake?”he says with a low tone as he looks down at you “yeah we do, anything else?” you say putting it into the Pc ready to ring it up, “yeah that’s all” he says pulling out his wallet from his pocket of the sweats he was wearing. “4.49” you say lightly tilting your head observing his every move out of pure curiosity he slides his card on the machine, you had him his receipt and he goes and finds a sit, then pulls out a book to distract his mind, he seemed exhausted not just physically but mentally, you decided to make him a small cup of rose tea it was a fan favorite after all, and a small sandwich since having just a sweet clearly wasn’t going to suffice his hungry. After everything was ready you walked over and placed everything in front of him “here you go hope you enjoy.” you say smiling lightly, he looks down at the table “i didn’t order the tea and sandwich, sorry” he says looking worried “oh don’t worry it’s on the house” you say “you sure your manager won’t mind” he says looking at you in the eyes, “i am the owner and i say it’s fine” giggling “anyways enjoy your night” you say walking into the bake of the bakery to clean some dishes you were dreading, when you head back to check the front he was gone. dishes neatly stacked and empty, “mmh he must’ve liked everything” you say in your head picking them up and then closing shop for the night. You made yourself a rose tea and headed upstairs to go get ready for bed to wake up tomorrow for another day at the bakery.

taglist; @kawoala @toorusfangirl @gumims @kokokoula @anonymity-222 @thechaosoflonging @abzyissupersleepy @hwanghyunjinismybae @chilichopsticks

if you want to be added or removed lmk ty!

[changbinsboiledegg]

The reader being quiet during sex was so sweet and cute and I liked it because some ppl are just not talkative during sex and that's okay.

However!

Can I please request how the members of Stray Kids be like when the reader is loud, whiney and loves dirty talk?

Thank you!

Hi hi! Thank you for the compliments! I honestly get why some people are loud and some are quiet. Both perfectly normal! Also thank you for your request & this meme. I will be committing theft of this bc San is bias wrecking me lately. :) 🫶 onwards to your request lmao.

AFAB! Reader X SKZ.

MDNI!!!! (bc one warning will suffice, I hope.)

Warnings: Oh boy. SMUT, obvi. Dirty talk, obvi pt 2. Swearing, usage of the word 'dick', 'cock' (bc I got over myself but only once.) and 'p*ssy', protected or unprotected fucc (not specified), fingering, idk why I keep making Minho a dom in these, oral (fem receiving), riding, wet dream mention, shower fucc, groping, blowjob, what's it called when you both m*sturbate each other? bc there's that too, rough seggs? kinda?

Note: Lmaooo I'm not good at dirty talk but I tried!!! so in advance, I'm sorry if some of the dialogue is cringe :'((( I also tried to keep it different scenarios, idk why reader is getting fingered so much, my fault. Anyways, if no one told you today, ilyyyyy and I hope you enjoy! Also, :)))) MDNI.

♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎

Chan

“I really need you inside of you.”

That was all you had to say to set him off. His night was booked the moment those words were whispered in his ear.

“Fuck! Right there! Ah!” You whined, pinned against the wall with Chan’s fingertips digging into your hips as he took you rather roughly.

“You like that? Like when I fuck you?” Chan huskily spoke close to your ear, thrusting deeper.

“Fuck yes! Fuck me! Harder!” You vocalized in loud whimpers, feeling your legs tighten around his waist as he relentlessly thrusted harder as per your request.

“So good. So fucking tight.” He muttered through grit teeth, feeling and enjoying the way your body shook from the pleasure coursing through you.

“I can feel you stretching me out.” You trembled, your mouth hanging open. Chan pressed his lips hungrily against your neck, sucking on the skin between his teeth.

“Ah, you’re so tight that it’s gripping my cock.” Chan mumbled, listening to your desperate and needy whines as he pounded into you.

Lee Know

“I can’t stop thinking about how wet you get for me.” Minho whispered, spreading your legs as he tugged your dampened panties off and leaving you exposed.

“Stop thinking and feel how wet I am for you.” You expected him to unbutton his jeans and stick his hard dick inside of you.

But he didn’t. Instead, he pressed his hand over your wet pussy and felt around, collecting some of your wetness on his fingertips.

He rubbed and lightly tapped your clit before slipping his fingers inside of you.

“Hmm, I’ve always wanted to feel your fingers fucking me.” You moaned, using one hand to grip one of your legs while the other lay idly on your breast.

Minho smirked at your words, how you reacted, and thrusted his fingers in and out of your wet hole, making a beckoning motion as you whined and rocked your hips.

“Fuck! I’m going to cum!” You were loud and honest, feeling your stomach tighten. Minho pulled his fingers out before you could find release and unzipped his pants.

“You will cum on my dick. Understand?”

Changbin

“How fast do you think I can make you cum?” Changbin asked, pulling your hips towards his face.

You looked at him and admired how eager he looked at he prepared to eat you out.

“Knowing you, I’d say a minute.” You released a shaky breath, feeling the sexual tension building up inside of you as he licked his lips, staring directly at your glistening pussy.

He started off with licks and soft sucking, earning whining from you.

“You don’t know how badly I needed your tongue on my pussy.” You shuddered, trying to keep your legs spread for him but the urge to squeeze his head with your thighs was overwhelming. He was eating you out so good that you couldn’t help yourself.

“You taste so good.” Changbin mumbled against your pussy, sucking on your sensitive clit and slipping two of his fingers inside of you.

“Fuck, fuck, don’t stop. I’m going to cum on your tongue!” You whined loudly, writhing a bit before he held you down with his free hand and continued to eat you out and finger you.

Hyunjin

“I missed having you between my legs.” You commented, sinking down on his dick and feeling him fill you up.

“I missed watching you ride me like this.” Hyunjin breathed out, groping and rubbing your body as you started off slow, adjusting to his dick after so long of not having him inside of you.

“I missed riding you.” You chuckled, biting your lip as you sank down deeper before raising your hips up.

“Fuck, you’re making me miss you already.” Hyunjin groaned. You let out a shuddering whine as you picked up speed, bouncing on his dick and throwing your head back.

“Holy shit! You feel so fucking good!” You gripped his shoulders, making eye contact.

“You’re so going to miss how good I’m fucking you right now.” You moaned out, not caring how loud you were being. Hyunjin groaned, gripping your hips tightly.

“I’m going to miss it so bad while I’m away.” Hyunjin guided you up and down his length rhythmically, bringing you closer to the edge.

Han

“I had a dream about you and now I really need to fuck you.” Jisung wrapped his arms around you from behind as he said this.

“Oh yeah?” You teased, pressing your ass against his erection. “How bad do you need to fuck me?”

“So bad.” Jisung kissed your neck, slowly grinding against you. You checked the time and shrugged.

“Then fuck me.” You challenged. Within a minute, he had you bent over the bathroom sink, your face pressed against the mirror as your moans, loud whining fogged the mirror.

“This is better than my dream.” Jisung slammed his hips against yours. “So tight and wet and needy, just like that baby.”

You whimpered as your walls throbbed and clenched around his pounding dick. “I know you’ll always fuck me so good. Leaves me wanting more.”

You gripped the edges of the sink, your legs shaking but you were feeling too good to allow yourself to collapse. Jisung sped up, slamming into you repeatedly.

“Shit, you’re going to make me cum all over this sink!” Your whimpers echoed through the bathroom. Jisung grunted, his dick twitching inside of you.

“Fuck, baby… so tight…”

Felix

“I get so hard when I’m around you.” Felix felt up and down your wet body as the shower ran over both of you.

You slightly swayed your ass, feeling his hard dick against you. “Is that why you joined me in the shower, you naughty boy?”

Felix grinded against you, fondling your body. “Maybe… I also think you’re beautiful when wet.”

His hand snaked down to your clit, rubbing circles. You moaned out, tilting your head back as water poured down your body.

“No. Not today.” You grabbed his hand and turned to face him. He cocked an eyebrows, confused.

You lowered yourself to your knees on the wet floor of the shower and took his dick in your hand.

“I really want to taste you.” You licked a stripe on his shaft, slowly jerking him off as you did. Felix let out a throaty groan, gripping the door of the shower. “Darling… Your lips look so pretty wrapped around my dick.”

You smirked, taking him into your mouth, bobbing your head up and down his length as he turned into a whimpering mess. You pulled him out of your mouth and looked up at him with a gleam in your eye.

“It makes me so wet when you fall apart for me.”

Seungmin

“Are you always this wet?” Seungmin asked, thrusting his fingers inside of you, his eyes dark as he watched your facial expressions.

“Are you always this hard?” You whined, softly gasping at the finger of his fingers working inside of you while your hand was jerking him off at the same speed.

“Only when I see you.” He used his other hand to wrap around your waist and pull you closer, his fingers going deeper.

“Fuck… and you wonder why I’m so wet…” you trembled, a whine escaping your lips as you quickened your hands pace when he quickened his.

“So needy too. I bet if I stopped, you’d cry.” Seungmin teased. You whined loudly, starting to rock your hips against his fingers.

“No! Don’t stop. I need you to make me cum.” You gasped when he went faster, staring directly into your eyes.

“Oh yeah? I need you to cum too.” He spoke lowly, curving and caressing your walls while thrusting. You screamed involuntarily, shaking as you jerked him off just as fast as his movements were.

“Fuck!”

I.N

“I only want one thing and that’s for you to make me scream.” You challenged, crossing your arms.

This entire night, you didn’t expect Jeongin to take your challenge literally. It wasn’t when he reacted to your dirty talking.

But you two were alone and he needed you just as badly as you lead him to believe you needed him.

He pushed your now naked body on the bed and ripped off his clothes before being hovered over you.

“What was it about making you scream?” Jeongin asked, spreading your legs apart. You quivered at the thought of him fulfilling your wish.

“I want you to fuck me until I scream.” You smirked, reaching down to stroke his hard erection. He breathed out, feeling your hand on his dick.

“You’ll be screaming until your throat hurts.” He muttered, guiding himself inside of you. You let out a soft gasp when he first entered, stuffing himself inside of your tight hole.

“I should’ve fucked you sooner today.” You moaned out, earning a smirk from Jeongin, who began moving his hips rhythmically.

“You think?” He gripped your thighs, picking up speed. You gripped the sheets, whimpering. “Oh fuck! Just like that!”

[koy0uu]

“Off with their heads”

Summary: In which Executor Rosehearts thinks about the future Queen…

Ship: Executor!Riddle Rosehearts X [future] Queen of Hearts!Reader

Fandom: Twisted Wonderland

Warnings: Mentions of beheading, public executions and blood. Riddle is an executor in this after all! Also some yandere-ish behaviour from Riddle

Author’s Note: Hello my dear costumers~ I am sincerely sorry for having been gone for 4 months. Writer’s block and school had me GOOD, sadly. I’ve been to “Shanti” by wotaku ft KAITO and it actually inspired me to write this haha. I also have multiple drafts going on, let’s see if I manage to upload them and finish them any time soon. Aside from that, I will use this as an announcement for my art sideblog @sirins-void on which I actually upload. Until then, this must suffice.

SPECIAL THANKS TO: My one and only Queen @l0laaa-ita for supporting me and being such an inspiration! Ilysm 💕

Word Count: 438

It is a soldier’s duty to serve his Queen. Anything she wants, she shall get. That is a soldier’s duty. That is what Riddle Rosehearts swore his life to. To protect you and listen to your every beck and call; his Queen’s happiness above all. And yet, how come he was jealous of every single one of your suitors? None of them were worthy! That was why he felt such joy and relief when you dismissed every single one your parents brought in, right? He merely wanted the best for the future Queen of Hearts, is all. That was precisely why he was always around you. To fulfil his duty of course. Not because of ridiculous reasons like him wanting to be the suitor you chose - Trey and Cater really did have radiant fantasies, spewing atrocities on his precious Queen’s name by claiming that “she’ll never find a suitor if she keeps rejecting everyone.” You were merely a lady of high status, beauty and Grace - it’s only natural you’d want to find someone just like that for yourself.

You only deserve the best. Anything below that is merely an insult to your excellency. That was why he accepted becoming an executor anyways - sure, his position as a soldier was just as good, however getting to serve you so closely, and ridding all those worthless bastards of their life at your command was just what he wanted. Sometimes, even he had such ridiculous thoughts, that told him that only he was worthy of you. He’s already killed so much for you, he’s serving you every day, and he is the servant you’re the closest with. You laughed and cried in front of him - he’s seen all your sides, and Riddle’s accepted them all, growing indeed fond of them all. A beautiful Queen with a beautiful heart; someone who all the blood on his hands was the bare minimum. He’d do anything for you. As a soldier, as a friend, aspiring to be more than that… So, what difference would it make if there were two matching rings on your fingers?

Unlike those swines your parents sought for you to marry, he did not care about the throne at all, but merely about you as a person. Your beauty may have intrigued him at first, but in the end it was the beauty of your personality, your kindness, your forgiving smile, your slight guilt of him having to behead the judged criminals for your sake. Slowly but surely, Riddle had understood just how precious your pure soul was. And he had no intentions letting anybody taint it, no matter what.

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed :D

All credits belong to @koy0uu on tumblr. Please do not steal my works! Reblogs are appreciated though :D

[nobody-lll]

Do you play games?

Hi!! Thx for asking!

Sorry that it took me a while to respond. For some reason, this went through 2 or 3 drafts, so it took a bit for me to finalize what exactly I wanted to say. Also, I apologize that it turned out as long as it did, especially when it really didn't need to be 😅. A good 3-4 sentences, or honestly, even just a simple yes or no, probably would have sufficed.

So, before I actually answer the question, I'm assuming that by "games," you mean specifically video games. I apologize if this is an entirely incorrect interpretation. You see, when it comes to stuff like this, I am actually really stupid.

Anyway, with all that out of the way, yes! I do indeed play video games. While I'm down to play just about anything, my absolute favorite games tend to have captivating art direction (Hollow Knight/Gris), engaging worldbuilding (Elden Ring/Bloodborne), engrossing vibes/atmosphere (Demon's Souls/Breath of the Wild), and/or a compelling cast of characters (Hades/Stardew Valley/Armored Core VI).

If I can get emotionally invested in at least one of these aspects, chances are that I'm gonna fall in love with that game, despite whatever faults it may have (Dark Souls II). Additionally, while not mandatory, a great soundtrack can go a long way too (Chrono Trigger/Mario Galaxy). Adding a song to my playlist definitely helps a game stick with me for a lot longer (Guilty Gear).

It doesn't so much matter to me if a game is "fun" either. While fun games (Smash Bros/Mario Kart/co-op games in general) are fun in their own right, it's not entirely necessary in order for me to love a game. I'd be remiss not to mention this, seeing as how it has clearly and undeniably shaped what games I gravitate towards, but I 've struggled with deppresion for over 5-ish years, so having fun can be a bit challenging at times, especially in the context of a single player video game, which is most of what I play. Heck, I would say, with the exception of Hollow Knight and Mario Oddyssey, that I kinda struggle to have a genuinely good time playing any of the games in my top 10 anymore. Dont get me wrong! They have there moments of course, but it's just not the main draw.

Also, not sure if you, or anyone else for that matter, are curious, but my top 7 video games, in no particular order, are Bloodborne, Gris, Dark Souls I, Dark Souls II, Hollow Knight, Elden Ring, Armored Core VI. These are the 7 games that are a straight 10/10 to me. They're all more or less tied for first. Not sure if I could realistically pick a favorite or least favorite out of them. As you can tell, I tend to like games that are kinda depressing.

And, I think that's about it. I could definitely keep going, but I think I'll end it here. I feel like I'd be disrespecting your time if I kept going.

Anyway, just wanna say thank you if you read this far.!! Hope this answered your question : )

[a-writer-on-elm-street]

say please

kinktober day three - begging

pairing: gavin x afab!reader

warnings: smut, begging, sub!gavin(?)

a/n: i am so behind but i'm gonna double post tomorrow to get back on track. anyway, i hope you enjoy this one because i've actually been really excited to write this one. also, this is my first time writing for gavin so i'm sorry if it's a bit out of character.

Gavin was laid flat against the mattress as you straddled his hips, your mouths clashing together in a desperate kiss. He'd practically been ignoring you all night, and this was the first time you'd managed to get him alone.

"You barely spoke to me at the party," you mentioned, sighing into his mouth, your hips gently grinding against his jeans. "Too busy chatting up Ray, were you?"

Gavin chuckled, his hands trailing up to grip your hips. "You jealous or something?"

"No," you said simply, before moving to get his jeans open, your hands clumsily clawing at the zipper. "Not at all."

When you finally got his jeans open, you pulled the material down his legs, leaving him in only his boxers now as you crawled back up the length of his body, settling yourself right on his crotch.

"You know," you started, shallow puffs of air leaving your lips as you spoke. "You could've at least given me a kiss or something at the party. A fucking glance would've sufficed."

Gavin just smirked, his hand trailing up to cup your jaw. "You are jealous."

You didn't bother to provide him with an answer as you reached down to slip his boxers down his legs, taking him in your hand.

And you smiled proudly when his hips jerked beneath you, his mouth falling open in a gasp.

"Fuck," he sighed, his eyes fluttering closed as you slowly worked your hand over his length, his hips rutting up into you.

You worked your hand around him a few more times then before letting go, standing up to remove your own clothes. And you couldn't help the heat radiating across your skin as Gavin watched you from where he lay on the bed, eyes filled with lust, his bottom lip pulled between his teeth. He was insufferable.

You climbed back on top of him, reaching between your bodies to curl your fingers around his dick, carefully guiding him to your entrance.

Except when he was finally inside you, you didn't move, moving your hands up to pin him to the bed.

"What're you doing?" He asked, confused, desperate to move.

"Say please," you simply said, smirking.

"If this is because I ignored you at the party, I didn't mean to, I─" He tried to sit up slightly, but you immediately pushed him back down.

"Say please," you repeated, earning a frustrated sigh from him.

"(y/n), come on─"

He stopped talking when you moved the tiniest bit, sending a shock of pleasure through both your bodies.

"Please!" He finally cried. "Fuck me, please."

And you did exactly that.

[Main Masterlist] [Kinktober Masterlist]

[foxfirexo]

my minecraft base on a server with a couple ppl; i am very proud of how it is turning out, the vibes are cozy and it has very organically expanded over time :3

tiny bit of story feel free to ignore and just scroll past but i feel like oversharing so fuck u (kindly <3)

ive always been pretty creative even if i spent the last decade or so telling myself i wasnt. when i was little it was lego, when i got older it was minecraft (among other things)

but being an audhd transgirl growing up in a very conservative southern baptist household (and as a PK and MK at that ;-;) and whose very existence was just fundamentally at odds with the teachings i was raised, i felt a lot of lot of pressure to suppress any self expression or identity i might have and with that went a lot of my creativity

after all, how am i supposed to be creative without expressing myself? and if ive numbed all the thoughts that i want to share bc they get me in trouble w my parents, what am i supposed to put into my art?

also being told your whole childhood that you're a guy and receiving all that lovely generational societal trauma of male gender roles and expectations really crushed the pointless wonderful meanderings of my mind. god i cringe a bit now(w compassion<3) but i used to brag about how obsessed i was with productivity, efficiency, logic, order but in hindsight i think it was 98% just feeling like i had to be a high achieving eventually bread winning "guy"

anyway as such ive had a very on again off again relationship w minecraft. it was a coping mechanism when i was young so ive put probably a good 5k+ hours into it but it became increasingly difficult to enjoy as i got older and ive gone years at a time never touching the damn game

its funny bc you could probably chart my whole healing journey and my ups and downs of my mental health by just measuring # of hrs spent in mc per month

but very recently ive been finally reaching a point (thank u therapist) that i am allowing myself the joy of self expression, that i am accepting and loving myself without the judgement of my youth holding me back, that i no longer feel like i have to hide myself away for fear of being crushed again because i have the self love to stand on my own two feet no matter what anybody else thinks

as silly as this probably sounds, joining tumblr just over a week ago has actually played a part in this too. ill probably ramble more ab that some other time whenever i feel like oversharing again but suffice it to say that this environment is incredible and everyone on this platform has made me feel so so so comfortable in my own skin being myself sharing my thoughts and feelings and just existing :3

and ya its a bit goofy but im actually seeing this milestone in how im playing minecraft. not only am i playing again (pretty regularly, too!) but im... just fucking around. no plan, no goal, if i have an idea pop into my head i just go out and do it but im equally content to just strip mine, chop trees, tend to my farms, whatever sounds good in the moment.....

and im building again too!!! no worrying about doing it "right", no stressing about wasting time bc i didnt count something right and now i have to move that wall or i changed my mind and now i have to redo all my flooring... just chipping away at it, trying out new blocks or decor ideas, enjoying it more for the process than the finished product and never needing anything to truly be finished

so ya :3 i havent felt this amazing playing minecraft since probably 2014/15 and im super proud of myself for getting to this point, its been a long journey and im by no means done but silly little things like this give me so so so sooo much hope and encouragement ^^

k thats all if u actually read all that im sorry or ur welcome lol

[nonbinaryeggrolls]

Battle of the Larynx I

Miguel O’Hara x afab!reader

Pt. 1, Pt. 2, Pt. 3, Pt. 4

Synopsis: Having Spider-Man as a boyfriend was becoming increasingly more difficult, and his reoccurring absence is tearing you apart

A/N: hi y’all! ik ive been so MIA with my stories lately. if im being honest sometimes i just don’t have ideas for new chapters or how to continue in progress stories, but hopefully i can get some more done soon! but for now enjoy this quick Miguel O’Hara story cuz i am OBSESSED with this man atm

Inspired by Battle of the Larynx by Melanie Martinez!

Warning: smut (fingering), toxic relationship, ANGST (yk i fucking live that shit), neglectful Miguel, LONG ASS CHAPTERS

MINORS DNI. AGELESS AND MINOR BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED

You knew what you were getting yourself into when he told you. You knew the nights that laid ahead for both of you filled with his crying and screaming after a failed mission led to a loss of innocent life. You knew the days would consist of hours holding your breath wondering if he was alive or not, and finally exhaling when he arrived there at your doorstep; battered and bloody but still, he was there. That was really the only promised you asked Miguel to keep— be there. You could handle him leaving randomly and not coming home until 2 in the morning, it was his obligation as a hero and that came before anything else. But he also took an obligation as your partner to be present when it mattered most, and according to him he cherished that concept with his life. So if that was the case why wasn’t he here now?

Miguel had been gone for 5 days now, longer than he’s ever been gone for. Five days of nothing, no calls, texts, emails, even an owl with a note would’ve sufficed at this point but he chose to leave you in the dark yet again. You touched up your mascara in the shiny elevator door reflection as you prepped yourself for the celebration party you and your art school classmates planned after you all landed the animation internship. What was supposed to be a chance for your friends to finally get to know Miguel was clearly turning into yet another evening third wheeling other couples. Another night of watching girls curl up with their lovers while you downed a spiked lemonade to forget about yours. This was the 26th time Miguel had abandoned an important event with no notice whatsoever (yes you’ve been keeping track). It started with simple things like picnic dates or small get togethers, then his absence gradually became more impactful. Missed family dinner’s, birthdays…anniversaries. Disappearing for days on end with no check ins, it was becoming torture. It was becoming increasingly obvious that people started to question whether or not you even had a boyfriend, and slowly you did too…

To Miggy 🧸:

please tell me you’re coming tonight, you know this means a lot to me Miguel

4:23

can you just call me and let me know youre alive at least????

4:49

i hope youre chaffing in your suit asshole

8:14

The elevator door opened letting you onto the top floor of Alchamex, it was pointless checking but you always did anyways. You crept your way into his office hoping to see his usual tired figure slumped over in his chair, ready for you to nag him like you usually do to take a break and eat something, but the only thing occupying the space was scattered papers. You looked through his window that towered over the Nueva York city streets trying desperately to hold back the tears that were fighting their way out.

“Y/N?”

Y/N: “Jess! Im- Im really sorry.” You turned your head only slightly so she couldn’t see your puffy eyes.

Jess: “Y/N, you’re part of reception you know you can get in a lot of trouble being up here without authorization.”

Y/N: “I know I know I just…I thought Miguel be here.” You mumbled between hiccups that came up from you failing to hide your sobs. Jess wasn’t stupid, it didnt take a genius to know what you were upset about, or who you were upset about, “If you um… if you see him can you just ask him to come home please.” Working through your sniffles, you wiped your face with your sleeve and made your way out of the office before she even had time to respond

Jess sighed feeling a twitch of anger brew inside her towards the young man, she scowled and muttered obscenities under her breath as she dialed Miguels number…

The next week came and you missed the party entirely, the calls from all your friends and colleagues went unanswered. Honestly, your self esteem couldn’t take another embarrassing, lonely entrance into an event that Miguel was supposed to accompany you too. Another endless night of sympathetic looks and pity hugs. 

The clock read 7:48 pm when you arrived home from work, another day of taking calls and booking meetings for a man that wasn’t even there half of the time. With a heavy sigh you set the bags of groceries you had in hand down in order to get your keys out of your back pocket. The space was dark and cold when you walked in, it had been for the last week. You stocked the fridge with your new groceries then before taking a quick shower and finishing your nightly routine. You were in the middle of applying your night cream when you heard a loud thud causing you to finally leave the bathroom. In the corner of your eye you caught a glimpse of a tall dark figure emerging from the window. You let out a shriek managing to fumble everything in hand as you scrambled to find your pepper spray.

Miguel: “Woah woah! Relax it’s just me! it’s me Y/N!” Usually you’d be used to Miguel’s late night window entrances but it had been so long since you last saw him you forgot he even did it. He turned on the living room light revealing his tired and bruised figure. He was still dressed in his spider suit, the suit you excitedly spent hours on your ipad drawing and redrawing to get the perfect design; now you hated the sight of that thing.

Y/N: “Miguel?”, seeing him gave you relief knowing it wasn’t an intruder, but the anger that’s been stirring in you for the last 2 weeks slapped you back to reality. Silence filled the space between you two, neither of you taking the initiative to speak first. It took 2 weeks for him to come back and you weren’t going to wait another second waiting for him to find the balls to say something.

Miguel: “Y/N please wait!…” he pleaded when you turned away and slammed the bedroom door behind you. You plopped down onto your mattress, you were exhausted and couldn’t stand to look at his face anymore, but you felt the empty bed space behind you dip with his weight.

Miguel: “Congratulations on your internship cariño, I knew you’d get it…” No response. “I…I got this for you. Y/N?” If you turned around you’d see the small gift wrapped box he held in his hand but you were motionless. This new silence terrified him. The possibility of you finally giving up on him made his heart sink a little

Miguel: “Y/N I’m really really sor—

Y/N: “Just shut up Miguel, shut up already…” you finally spoke through gritted teeth, “You’ve never cared about a single thing that I care about, if you did then you would’ve been there like you said you would but you weren’t! SO JUST FUCKING SHUT UP!” you sobbed and curled your legs closer to your chest

Miguel: “I know you’re angry at me… but Y/N I really am sorry. I’m sorry that I didn’t call you or text you. I’m sorry it took Jess calling me to make me realize how terrible I was being. I should’ve been there to take you to your friends party, like I promised I would. I wanna be someone you can count on and trust but I’m screwing it all up.”

At this point Miguel had already stood up from the bed, you could feel the floor thump as he paced back and forth trying to find the right words to say to you. You couldn’t help but peek over at him, he looked horrible with his head in his hands and blood and dirt still caked on his suit. Regardless of how angry you felt towards Miguel you always took pity on the poor man. He loved you with everything he was and everything he wasn’t, all he wanted was to be everything you ever needed, but you were the first woman he had ever been with since Dana and Gabriella passed. You knew loving you was like learning to walk again.

You called his name in your soft voice. His head shot up, you were finally facing him with your arms open inviting him in for a hug. Miguel practically jumped from his seat and into your arms. Words couldn’t describe how good it felt to feel your touch and even though he smelled like ash and rubble you felt exactly the same, practically crying as you melted into his hold

Y/N: “I thought you were dead Miggy, you can’t keep putting me through this I can’t take it.” He settled deeper into your embrace and rested his head into the crook of your neck

Miguel: “I know, I’ll be better for you…” You felt his lips latch onto your neck and pepper you in small kisses, “I love you Y/N. I love you so much.” He groaned against you, pushing his stiffened member against your groan and pulling out a desperate moan from your lips

Y/N: “I…I love you too Miggy…fuck!” You screamed has he drove his thick fingers into your already soaking cunt. Every curl and thrust against your plush walls pushed you closer and closer to your edge.

You cried against his shoulders. There were times when the space that was wedged between you two felt infinite then dwindled every time he came back home to you.

It was euphoria, to feel him with you again.

But every high has to come down at some point.

The sound of arguing pulled you from your sleep. It was 2 in the morning when you rolled over to see a space where Miguel was originally sleeping beside you. It wasn’t unusual for Miguel to wake up in the middle of the night to work at the kitchen table or yell to Jess about some other spider variant that messed up a mission; one named Peter seemed to come up very frequently. However it seemed like this specific conversation went on for a fairly long time, you could even begin to here Miguel’s voice shake with whoever he was speaking to.

You slipped on a new t shirt from Miguel’s drawer since the clothes you previously had on had been ripped to shreds. His voice became more and more clear as you made your way down the hall

Miguel: “Do you already have an idea on who it could be?…Fuck. Okay, I’ll *sigh* I’ll be there soon.” He hung up and pinched the bridge of his nose in a mixture of frustration and disappointment.

Y/N: “Youre leaving again aren’t you?” Your voice startled him out of his sulk.

Miguel: “…Jess suspects there’s a spider variant that’s purposely letting anomalies run loose in other dimensions. I have to handle this Y/N...”

7 hours, it took 7 hours to fall into the same old routine. It was honestly amusing at this point, all you could do was laugh. How stupid you were to think things could be any different. How stupid you were to think that HE could be any different.

Y/N: “Are you fucking serious?!” You shouted

Miguel: “Y/N Stop it, not right now please. I need you to just go back to bed and let me—

Y/N: “Let you what?! Let you leave me and come back anytime you find it convenient? How long are you gonna be gone this time Miguel, a month this time? Do you even care about the promise you kept to me? Or do I even cross your mind when you’re out there dimensions away from home playing hero for everyone else but me? This isn’t a hotel Miguel, this is our home! At least that what it fucking used to be!” You fumed. He towered above you but that didn’t stop from getting in his face, “It’s not fair Miguel! You don’t get to leave me alone for weeks and come back and fuck me thinking that’ll make it all better! You have to be better!”

Miguel: “You need to stop acting like you’re the only person in my world that needs my attention! I’m not a monster for putting the safety of the multiverse first. Im sorry I can’t be here to rock you to bed and give you a kiss goodnight all the time. Sometimes we have to put personal matters on the back burner Y/N, it’s called responsibility!” He gathered his phone and the rest of his belongings off the kitchen table

Miguel: “I have enough to worry about as it is, having you and Jess blowing up my phone to go to some party with people I don’t even know doesn’t he—

Y/N: “What?” Your tone was softer and started to become laced with hurt, it was evident in the way your voice started to shake, “Jess called you that night and it took you a week to come back?”

Realization of what he just said settles in and it makes his brows furrow in frustration and both himself and you. When he looks over at you with that same stupid emotionless face he always has you can’t help but boil with anger. His nonchalance towards your problems made you curl your fist until your knuckles turned white

Y/N: “No you’re not a monster, but you are an ASSHOLE for making me believe you could balance work and me! Why are you even with me if you can’t—

Miguel: “This conversation is over, I have a job to do and youre keeping me from doing it.” He cut you off harshly, dismissing your concerns yet again.

Y/N: “I never asked you to sacrifice your obligations! I said from the beginning that being a hero comes first, just make some goddamn time for me now and then! Why Miguel? Why do I have to beg you to see my family at Christmas?! Why do I have to beg you to meet my friends or give me an ounce of attention?! Why do I have to ask you to care about me?!”, This was frustrating him too much, your lack of understanding was infuriating. Miguel had to leave before he said something he might regret. He turned away from you and your manic sobbing and made his way to the window seal without another word, afraid that he might damage things worse than they already were by speaking

Y/N: “If we switched places I wouldn’t DARE treat you as terribly as you treat me—

Miguel: “WELL YOURE NOT ME! YOU SIT AT A DESK AND DOODLE ON A FUCKING COMPUTER! YOUR CAREER IS A JOKE, A CHILD COULD DO WHAT YOU DO. YOU CONTRIBUTE NOTHING TO THIS WORLD, I DO.” His nostrils flared and his eyes burned red with anger, “SO DONT YOU DARE SPEAK ABOUT MY LIFE LIKE YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT IT, WHAT IVE HAD TO SACRIFICE JUST TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT IN THIS WORLD!”

Y/N: “GOD. YOU ARE SUCH A CUNT!”

Miguel: “AND YOURE A REPLACEMENT!”

Miguels eyes widened and his rampage instantly stopped. You couldn’t believe the words that had just left his mouth, and honestly he couldn’t either. He didn’t mean it at all, he wanted to take back those words as soon as the left his mouth, he just wanted to leave. Why didn’t you just let him leave? He wouldve been right back. The air was thick and uncomfortable, your combined heavy breathing was the only thing filled the space between the two of you.

Miguel: “I…I’ll be right back.” There was a shakiness in his voice and in his movement when he stepped out onto the fire escape.

Y/N: “Dont come back. If you leave tonight…don’t come back Miguel.” You spoke in a tone barely above a whisper

Miguel: “We’ve said things we don’t mean…I’ll be back later to fix things.” His suit integrated onto his body and he leapt off of the building ledge. A blur of blue and red was the only trace he left behind.

The truth was out now, how Miguel really felt towards you. You were never a first priority or even a second or third, you were nothing but a soul to fill the space where something else was missing. His wife, his daughter, you never tried to stand in their place or become what they were to him, but now you knew that’s the only reason Miguel kept you around. You were his vice

Your heavy cries carried throughout the apartment as you laid in bed cradling the maroon cardigan that was in the gift box Miguel got you.

The spider society headquarters was empty and calm, but the office at the top floor was anything but. Miguel sat atop of his hovering platform brooding in silence in front of his computer monitors, It’d been like this since he arrived. Miguel was always stern and reserved, he never held a conversation with anyone other than Jess or Lyla so him being fairly quiet was normal. But for Miguel to not say anything at all was strange, and it didn’t take long for others to take notice of his behavior shift since leaving your apartment

Margo, Peter, and Jess were the last people at headquarters, after a long day of interrogating potential rogue variants the crew was finally successful and able to apprehend Spiderman on Earth-3360. What will happen to the young man wasn’t decided yet but catching him was a cause for celebration. The group sat around the cafeteria table sharing empanadas and Soju for a few minutes before they went back to their own universes

Margo: “Yeah Ive been in his office all day with him and Lyla and he’s barely said 2 sentences, he wasn’t even mean during interrogation. It’s like he didn’t have it in him to yell. I think he’s depressed or something.”

Peter: “I thought he was always depressed, that’s like his thing isn’t it? That’s why he’s not funny.” He joked and finished off the last empanada

Jess: “I don’t know but I need to get home, my back is killing me and I can’t deal with The Grinch any longer.” She said taking letters hand to help her up from the chair.

The group said goodnight to each other, Margo logged off and Jess went home to some much needed rest, honestly this line of work seems too dangerous for a pregnant woman. Peter made his way up to Miguel’s office, who he knew could hear the entire conversation thanks to his enhanced hearing.

Peter: “You know they’re right Miguel…” he shouted up to Miguel who was brooding on his platform

Miguel: “About what?” he asked in a condescending tone

Peter: “About you, you don’t think we’ve noticed you moping around all day. Do you wanna tell me what the deal is so you can stop pouting?” he swung onto the platform and took a seat next to Miguel, crossing his arms and sitting firm in place waiting for Miguel’s response but he was met with silence, “Is it the rogue variant? Cuz we’re not gonna let this happen again…”

Miguel: “No.”

Peter: “Miles? Gwen? Ben?”

Miguel: “No it’s none of them.” He turned his attention away from him and focused on organizing the handful of papers on his desk

Peter: “Then what is it? Is it Y/N?”

Miguel: “Did I say anything about Y/N?! Why even bring her up?!” He snapped, it was exhausting having to work and act like every terrible thing he said wasn’t weighing on his mind. Miguel couldn’t even interrogate the variant with losing focus, having to have Jess switch him out is gonna remain one of the most embarrassing points in his Spider-Man career. Peter was never a first choice for a sounding board, but it was only going to get worse for Miguel if he didn’t turn to someone for advice, because Lord knows he was terrible at handling relationship problems on his own

Miguel: “I said something bad, really really bad Peter…” he confessed. He took a seat in the chair next to him

Peter: “Do you wanna be more specific?”

Miguel: “I told her that her career was a joke. Then I called her…a replacement.” Peters eyes widened, he knew Miguel was capable of harsh words, he’d seen it first hand with Miles but this was unexpected. Especially with you, the girl he fawned over and practically stalked at work until you made the first move.

Peter: “Shit, Miguel. That’s really messed up…Did you mean it?” He asked

Miguel: “No of course not! I didn’t mean any of it, I was just frustrated. I’m not the bad guy for prioritizing my duties! She just wasn’t listening Peter, she wasn’t understanding any of what I was saying or where I was coming from. I didn’t mean what I said.”

Peter: “So why did you say it?!” Peter exclaimed

Miguel: “I DONT KNOW!”, He slouched over in his chair and cradled his head in his hands, his own words made him sick to his stomach. How he urged to tell you how guilty he was for what he said, for never being there, for making you feel like you didn’t mean anything, “I just wanted her to be quiet, everything she was saying was right but it made me feel guilty and awful. I wanted to make her feel worse than I felt. God I’m so fucking dumb…”

Peter: “You know I’m not good with this, it wasn’t long ago that I was a sad piece of shit too with a partner at home who basically couldn’t stand me. That being said, I also know that when it feels like nothing you say can make up for everything you said, and you said A LOT, maybe too much. I would never say something like that, that was insane…”

Miguel: “Peter…” he said through gritted teeth

Peter: “Sorry sorry, that being said when it feels like there’s nothing you can say that could make up for everything you said, a simple apology means more than you think it does. A real apology Miguel.” Peter looked at him, he didn’t need words to know that Peter was basically tell him to finally get his shit together.

Miguel: “What if she doesn’t accept it?”

Peter: “She will if you mean it…”

Passing buildings were a blur to Miguel, he was racing home so fast he couldn’t even focus on anything around him. While he swung from structure to structure he planned out every single thing he’d say to you, how he’s sorry for failing you in this relationship and he’d change for the both of you. He even tried to remember if there was still cinnamon in the spice cabinet so he could make you your favorite comfort drink, champurrado.

Miguel soon landed on the fire escape outside your apartment, you made a habit of leaving the curtains open for him so he could see if you were up or not and now it was an involuntary part of your routine. He peeked inside and saw you sleeping peacefully on your bed, hoping to come join you he tried to open the window but it wasn’t budging.

‘Had you locked it on purpose?’ He thought to himself, no you couldn’t have, you always left in unlocked for him. But when he saw the book you had used to block the window from being moved he panicked. Miguel knocked on your window, frantic and desperate

Miguel: “Y/N! Y/N! Unlock the window!” He pleaded. His knocking stirred you out of your sleep and you sat up in your bed, your puffy eyes on full display. When you finally looked over at him you were emotionless just as he was to you, it terrified him seeing you look at him with no longing or affection

Miguel: “Let me in…please cariño”, he begged

You were so tired, you were so tired of wondering why your boyfriend left you to question his love for you and now after tonight you know why. You stood face to face with him, the window still a barrier between you and him. It ate away at you but you couldn’t stand another night asking yourself why you weren’t getting the love you deserved. You had your answer and you didn’t need Miguel around anymore, not if you were going to be another substitute for what was missing.

Miguel: “Y/N…Y/N please wait!—

You closed the curtain in his face and went back to bed but it didn’t stop his knocking and pleading, begging for you to let him in and mend what he broke. It continued for an hour until you were convinced he eventually gave up and left. Him being gone finally gave you a chance to break down once again into your sheets, but Miguel sat on the fire escape listening to every choked out sob and hiccup you let out. Every painful cry the he caused you and now he wondered if he’d ever be able to fix it.

[rubyreduji]

hehe i am actually the teacher jihoon anon and also the ceo jihoon anon!!! i guess i am career woozi anon now 🤔 but i just wanted to say thank you for making my thoughts come into reality!! thank you for writing them and i’m glad i could help you get out of a lil writing rut with the teacher idea <3

but 👀 since we are on the topic of jihoon… i recently got his fts carat vers album and in the pcs there is one of him with one of his feet on like something a little bit smaller than a table… if that makes sense, ever since i got it i can’t stop thinking about ceo jihoon or just jihoon fucking you in a similar position 😵‍💫 after you purposely make him jealous too or wear something revealing… phew. i hope i described the position well enough? but i’m sure u can look at the pcs! hehe just some jihoon brainrot i hope i can dump my thoughts in ur inbox 🤲🏻

first off hi im so sorry this took so long (im always saying that but i do feel bad that im such a mess) but i didn't realize you're the same anon haha! i love it sm thank you for all of your requests <<33

secondly so i actually can't find the pc you're talking about 😭😭 i feel so bad and i can't tell if im imagining the position well but i love the idea of jealous ceo jihoon so i hope this suffices (if not maybe send me an ask with the pc and i'll see what i can do?)

pt. 1

[minors dni]

it's been a few weeks since the encounter between you and jihoon in his office and thought it seems like jihoon has stopped his mistreatment towards you, he hasn't alluded to that day at all

he's nothing but proper around you; formal greetings in the morning, considering your ideas in meetings, praising the work you turn in. it's strange and you almost wish he would go back to degrading you every second, at least then you knew he acknowledged you, it's almost like you don't exist anymore

you tell yourself he probably regrets it. he's your ceo for goodness sakes, of course he regrets it. you hate yourself for caring so much because you know jihoon is nothing but a up tight, rude man who thinks of only himself first. the thing is you thought that just maybe it meant something, the other day in his office. he literally called you his favorite how can that not mean something?

well if he's not going to care about you, then you're not going to care about him. it's not like it would have gone anywhere anyways, jihoon isn't worth your worries

"y/n!" you look at the call of your voice to see kwon soonyoung approaching your desk. you like soonyoung, he's upbeat and nice and has always backed you when jihoon was too harsh

"hi soonyoung. how can i help you?"

"would you mind if i ate lunch with you today? it just feels like it's been a while since we've caught up"

"no i wouldn't mind at all" you smile up at the man and he grins happily back at you

soonyoung takes a seat at your desk and pulls his lunch out. you two start a conversation about your lives outside of work. you listen to soonyoung talk about his secondary job as an afternoon choreographer at a dance studio and you can't help but get lost in his stories about his students. you can tell he has a passion for what he does and loves the students he works with

eventually the conversation switches over to you and you're telling soonyoung your own stories when you hear your name shouted across the office

"y/n l/n! my office. now." you look over to see jihoon standing by the elevator, an angry look on his face. soonyoung gives you a worried glance and you quietly excuse yourself before scurrying over to the elevator

jihoon doesn't speak as you two ride up to his office. he doesn't say a single thing until you two are inside his office, the doors shut and locked

"you really do know how to get someone's attention, don't you?"

"i don't know what you're talking about, sir"

"you and kwon soonyoung. don't think i didn't notice the way he was all over you"

"he was just being friendly"

"is that what wanting to get into someone's pants is called these days?"

"jihoon i don't understand what the problem is here. soonyoung and i are friends. it was just lunch"

"the problem is you belong to me" jihoon grabs your face and forces you to look directly at him "you got that?"

you're feeling bold so you spit out "you've barely acknowledge me for the past two weeks"

"so you go and throw yourself at someone else? i didn't take you for a slut, mx. l/n"

"i- that's not- jihoon-"

"do you not want to belong to me?" he's asking permission. in his own fucked up, power hungry way, he's asking permission

you take a big gulp before answering "i- i do, sir"

"that's what i thought. be good now"

with a hand still cupping your face jihoon pulls you into a rough kiss. your lips are messy as they press against each other, desire running through your body

jihoon's hand slides down your neck and to your shirt where he starts to unbutton your shirt. his fingers are nimble and soon your bare skin is exposed to the room. his hands run over your torso, his fingers cold against your warm skin, and you shiver. you feel jihoon smirk at that before his fingers breech the waistband of your pants

his fingers trail against your skin and you gasp into his mouth when his hand plunges deep and cups you over your most sensitive parts. you whine a bit and buck into his hand

"so needy" jihoon tuts

his fingers push back further until his digits trace around your entrance, teasing you

"jihoon please" you beg

"please what?"

"please fuck me. i need it. i need you"

"that's what i like to hear"

jihoon pulls his hands out of your pants and quickly unbuttons them and pulls them down along with your underwear. there's a coffee table sitting in the corner of his office and he points to it

"bend over"

you quickly follow orders, rushing to bend over the table for him, not wanting to prolong him not being inside of you any longer. you feel a big embarassed with your whole ass exposed to the room, wantonly waiting as jihoon takes his time to walk over to you

you hear his own pants drop to the floor before he squirts some lube onto his fingers and shoves them inside of you. you jolt and moan as he fingers you open. he doesn't keep his fingers inside of you for long though, because soon he's pulling them up and grabing your hips to pull them up to meet his cock

without much warning he thrusts into you and you have to bite down on your lower lip to keep your screams in. you breathing gets choppy as jihoon pistons into you, pounding into you fast and hard

his cock is heavy and large and feels even better than his fingers did the last time jihoon touched you

it doesn't take long for you body to start to feel heavy with pleasure, your mind fuzzy with the only thought floating through you head being jihoon jihoon jihoon

jihoon props his leg up onto the table and pulls yours hips into his and you whine at the way his cock digs into your sweet spot at this angle

"only i get you like this, got it? you're my pretty little thing and no one else's. especially not kwon soonyoung's"

"fuck jihoon, only you. no one else makes me feel this good. promise"

"say it again"

"only you jihoon. i'm yours"

"yes, that's it. so good for me"

one of jihoon's hands reaches around to rub at where you ache the most for his touch

"so tight y/n" jihoon grunts "not gonna last much longer"

"sir please cum in me, please"

your words and the breathlessness of your tone is all it takes for jihoon to spill over, filling you full of his seed

your own release comes quickly after as jihoon presses a kiss to your neck, the press of his warm lips against your neck sending you over the edge. you shake in jihoon's grip as your insides pulse around jihoon's cock

you're panting as jihoon pulls out of you. he grabs a tissue off of the coffee table to wipe you both off

you both get dressed again and for a second you're both awkwardly standing around until you turn to leave

"y/n wait" jihoon grabs your arm "i- uhm, i'm sorry...if i came off too strong earlier. i've uh, never done something like this before so-"

"it's okay jihoon, i get it. don't worry. i won't tell anyone either, if that's what you're worried about"

"no! that's not it i just-" you don't think you've ever seen your boss so distressed before "would you like to have dinner with me tonight?"

oh. that's not what you were expecting at all

"oh! uhm. y-yes, i'd like that a lot" you can feel your face heat up with your fluster

"good. well uhm. i'll see you tonight" jihoon stands there for a moment like he doesn't know what to do before he quickly leans in to press a kiss to your cheek and then he turns and walks over to his desk like he didn't just do that

you smile to yourself as you head out of jihoon's office, giddy for what's to come later