#ANOTHER FRIEND HELPED ME PICK OUT A SONG FOR THEM AND IT FIT TOO WELL NOT TO ADD 8U

[ldydeath]

You’re the Only One | Kwon Ji-yong (G-Dragon)

Summary: Ever since you broke up with Jiyong you’ve been miserable. You fly out to his show to surprise him and get him back, but will he still want you? Warnings: Mild Language Author’s Note: This is a sequel to We Were Never Meant to be, which you can read here. I am obsessed with his look from yesterday and had to give them another shot. 

It had been three months since you’d moved out of Jiyongs place. Three months since you’d broken both your hearts because that’s what you thought was best. Turns out you were miserable without him and you’d heard through mutual friends he was too.  You weren’t usually the one to go back on your word, but how long were you supposed to wait to be happy? If this had been the right decision you wouldn’t be checking in on his life, waiting to see if he posted something cryptic about how he was doing everyday. You wouldn’t pick up the phone wanting to call him all the time.

Sure you’d had your problems there at the end but maybe that really was just because he’d been so stressed about the upcoming album, variety show, and world tour. Maybe you’d been a little too selfish to think he needed to fit you into that schedule. You should’ve been there for him more, like he’d always been there for you when you needed him.

Jiyong had always been big on romantic gestures so you hoped as you flew the few short hours to Thailand that he’d actually be happy to see you. He was playing a festival that night and Daesung, his always loyal friend, had promised to help pull this surprise off. You weren’t going to see him until after his set and you knew he had a flight straight back home so you had to move quickly. 

“Hey!” Daesung's cheerful voice greeted you as you made your way backstage. “You made it!” 

He embraced you in a warm hug and you smiled up at him. It was good to see him, even if it felt weird that he was the one greeting you. You could hear Jiyong’s laughter down the hall and your heart clenched. All you wanted to do was run to him, tell him you loved him, and never let him go again. Daesung smiled at you before leading you to his room. 

“He’s on right after me, if you want to watch from the stage.” You nodded, opting to watch Daesung’s set from the safety of his room. Once he was done, you grinned at him.

“That was amazing!” 

It had been so long since you’d seen him perform his own set, it really was like the old days again. Except that you weren’t here with Jiyong, not technically. You watched the start of his set with Daesung in his sitting room before you both agreed that it was probably safe to watch the rest up close.

You knew his routine in his old songs so well, he’d be too distracted to look your way. You watched proudly as he moved around the stage without missing a beat. You’d seen his performance in December and January through crappy live feeds, seeing him in person was so much better. It was as if no time had passed, as if he’d never forgotten who G Dragon was. It truly was a sight to see. 

He’d just gotten done run-rapping across the stage when his eyes met your and his breath caught in his throat. He’d officially gone crazy, right? He shook his head, his hands going to mess with his hair and he turned his gaze towards the fans. He only had a couple songs left. He’d get himself checked out with medical right after. Maybe the heat was finally getting to him. Maybe he just needed to take his jacket off. He shrugged out of it, turning to throw it backstage but there you were again. What the fuck? 

You hadn’t wanted to be caught, not while he was busy, but you offered him a small smile of reassurance and he raised a brow at you, clearly confused before turning back to finish his set. You noticed that he made it a habit to not turn towards you for the reminder of his songs. That was fine, you were enjoying the view either way. Maybe you shouldn’t have been though.

Your heart started racing the second his set finished and the lights went dark. You hadn’t exactly practiced what you were going to say when you came face to face with your ex, you figured you’d just let your heart speak for you. But now here he was and you had nothing to say.

“Hi.” Smooth. He blinked at you before moving to walk past you. “Jiyong, wait.” 

He turned slowly as if afraid that once he did you’d be gone. He blinked a few more times before ushering the dancer and his security away. You saw Daesung poke his head out of his sitting room before quickly ducking back inside.

“What are you doing here?” There was nothing malicious in his words but you still couldn’t help the panic rising in your body. Your heart really needed to slow down. 

“I missed you.” You bit down on your bottom lip, making eye contact with him. “I think maybe I made a mistake with this whole breakup thing. I’m miserable, I can’t get you out of my head. I honestly don’t think I want to. I love you so much, I’m going crazy.” 

His arms were around you before you could even register what was happening. You melted into him, wrapping your arms around him, burying your head in his chest. You didn’t even mind that he was drenched in sweat as you breathed him in. It just felt nice to be close to him like this.  

“I missed you too.” He mumbled into your hair. His heart thumping so loudly in his chest he thought you’d might be able to hear it.

It didn’t matter anymore that you’d broken his heart. The late nights he’d spent awake trying to find the words to make you come home, or how fucking lonely he’d felt releasing songs, going to shows, and launching his show without you by his side. It didn’t matter anymore because he was holding you and that broken piece inside of him had healed the second he’d met your eyes. 

Without any hesitation he bent down, his finger lifting your chin until your lips met his and he practically devoured you. Every ounce of pain he’d felt over the last few months poured into that kiss, but so did all the love he still felt for you. You held onto him tightly, pulling him closer never wanting this moment to end.

When he finally pulled away, you felt dizzy. Bringing a hand up to your chest, to calm your breathing, you dared a look at him and he was grinning at you. You couldn’t help but grin back, his smile had always been so contagious. 

“I love you. Can we please try again?” His eyes were wide as he asked the question and your heart just about leaped out of your chest. 

“Yes, if that’s what you want. I want it too.” He nodded at your words, his hands reaching to grip yours.

“All I have ever wanted is you. None of this has ever meant anything without you. Please come home.” 

You nodded your head at him and he leaned in to kiss you again. He turned, leading you down the hall and towards the awaiting car. This is where you belonged, it had just taken you some time to figure it out. Once you were both in the car you leaned over to peck his check. You were never going to make the mistake of leaving Jiyong again. You were his and you’d be his for as long as he’d have you. And he would have you forever if he had any say in that. 

tag list:@wcnderlnds @alosss-blog @sooyasya @dprvivi @infinetlyforgotten @mirahyun @loveesiren

[astraljedi]

The Bolter (Scott Miller - Twisters)

Warnings: Angst, natural disaster, survival situation, anxiety, implied PTSD. A bit of sexual content but not really.

Pairing: Scott Miller x Female OC

Word count: 4,510

Song: The Bolter by Taylor Swift

A/N: This is for the loml, that requested that I write for her boo from Twisters. Hope you like it, babes

Splendidly selfish, charmingly helpless Excellent fun 'til you get to know her

“We’ve known you for about a year now. How do we not know what got you into storm chasing?” Boone practically shouts, his excitement spilling over as he realizes he’s about to hear a good story.

I roll my eyes, tossing the bag of snacks I just bought from the convenience store into the truck. “You never asked, Bones,” I say, mimicking his twang.

“Come on, you love talking about your storm-chasing days before we found you. I feel hurt you’ve kept some from us.” He teases, reaching for my spicy chips. I slap his hand away. He never learns.

“It’s not personal. I just have so many, I tend to forget them.” I lie. I remember every single one—every reckless, adrenaline-fueled moment. I live for this. The chase. The science. The wild unpredictability of it all. Storms make most people freeze in place. I can’t help but lean in.

Boone narrows his eyes. He’s not buying it. “Alright, well, you gotta tell me one now. What’s the story, Lucy?”

I lean against the truck, scanning the horizon as if I can see a storm brewing in the distance, even though the sky is clear. This chasing season feels different. Ever since storm chasing went viral last year, we’ve been expecting a live audience.

“Alright, fine.” I shrug, cracking a grin. “I’ll tell you the one that started it all.”

“Hey, guys! Lucifer is telling another story from her vault!” Boone shouts to the rest of the group. They’ve heard a few of my wild tales over the past year, and they know they’re in for a good one.

I smirk. “It all started on the last day of my junior year, when a bunch of kids from my class decided to raid a creepy abandoned house on the edge of town, right in the middle of some random-ass field. We were drinking, dancing, celebrating the beginning of summer and becoming seniors.” My voice dips slightly as I slip into the memory, like it just happened yesterday.

The crew gathers around, familiar faces in the mix, but a new one catches my eye. He stands out from the rest. Clean white shirt, beige hat, dark blue jeans that fit his tall, broad body too well. I look away before I get caught staring.

“The perfect place to mark the end of the year. Typical teenage shenanigans.”

“Typical Lucifer shenanigans, you mean.” Tyler cuts in, making everyone laugh—except the new guy.

I flip Tyler off. “Hey, this is my origin story, not yours.”

“This was before my nickname, though. We were drinking cheap beer someone’s older brother bought, and I was dancing with my girls when the sirens went off. My gut clenched, but everyone ignored it. ‘No tornado has ever touched down here,’ they said. ‘We’re fine.’”

I pause for a second, remembering the sharp shift in the air.

“They were wrong.”

The group quiets. Even Boone leans in.

“The wind picked up. The ground started shaking. And then—boom—a tornado touched down. I was the first to react. The buzz disappeared, and suddenly my entire class was frozen. My first thought was to get everyone inside. I pushed them toward the house, led them down to the basement, and we waited it out. That tornado passed barely a foot from us. The howling wind, the walls shaking, my best friends hanging on to me for dear life. It was terrifying. But no one got hurt.”

I let out a dry chuckle. “Then, of course, the sheriff showed up and called all our parents.”

Groans and knowing laughter ripple through the group.

“Everyone was even more scared of their parents than they were of the tornado.” I shake my head. “Mine were pissed, but I was still riding the high. The next day, I started looking up meteorology programs. And now, here I am, chasing storms for a living.”

That part of the story always makes me smile. Tyler and his crew are the best thing that’s happened to me. They’re my family.

“One more story before we hit the road, Lucy.” Lily calls from where she’s perched on the truck bed.

I glance up at the sky, feeling the shift in the air. “A short one. The winds are picking up.”

I grin. “This is the story of how I got my nickname.”

The group perks up. Even the new guy is listening.

“It was after college. I was on a date with a rising bull rider. Dinner, a movie, and then a steamy makeout session in his car.” I smirk. “Everything was going great, but something felt off. The air was wrong. Heavy. I could feel a storm coming, but he was too busy—well, with his face buried in my chest.”

Boone howls. Even Tyler shakes his head with a grin. The new guy? Nothing.

“I heard that familiar boom and knew we had seconds. I shoved him off, jumped into the driver’s seat, and floored it in reverse. He started screaming when he saw what I was actually saving us from. We crashed into a barbed-wire fence, wrecked his paint job, but at least we got out.”

I glance at the new guy again. This time, I catch him rolling his eyes. Rude.

“Anyway, once we were safe, he called me the devil. Told everyone in town. And suddenly Lucy ‘Lucifer’ was born. But I didn’t care, I was already planning on leaving that sad little town.”

A gust of wind kicks up dust, making the air feel electric.

“She’s a witch, I’m telling you.” Dexter points at me, dead serious for a second before breaking into laughter.

“She’s just reckless. None of that sorcery crap.”

The new guy speaks up for the first time. His voice is steady, dismissive. My head snaps toward him.

“Reckless? I call it intuition and knowledge.” I shoot back. I’m not about to get lectured by some neat freak. “Oh, looks like you’ve got a stain on your shirt.”

His eyes widen, immediately checking his spotless white shirt.

I smirk. “My bad. It’s just your fragile masculinity.”

His jaw tenses. “This isn’t a game. It’s childish.”

“Scott, we need to go.” Javi steps in, motioning toward their pristine white trucks, all loaded with high-tech gear.

I dust off a nonexistent speck from Scott’s sleeve and flash him a grin. “Good luck storm chasing.”

Then, just as I climb into the truck with my crew, I throw one last parting shot over my shoulder.

“If you see me run, then you should worry, Scott.”

A few hours later

The chase winds down, and we all gather in a motel parking lot with other storm chasers. The place is packed, trailers and trucks lined up in every direction, but no one’s inside. Everyone’s out in the open, sharing food, stories, and drinks—one of the things I love most about this community.

The storm has passed, the sky calm now, fading from fiery oranges and pinks to deep navy. Laughter and music blend with the smell of grilled food and the clink of beer bottles. It’s nostalgic in a way. After every chase, I take a moment to ground myself. It’s part of my routine—standing off alone, watching the constellations appear as the sky darkens, letting my body flush out the high from earlier.

From where I stand, I can see my crew sprawled around a few foldout chairs, swapping stories over pizza and beers. But my eyes drift elsewhere—toward Scott, standing with his team and a few other chasers, their attention locked on whatever new toy he’s showing off.

“We’ve got the latest radar system. The forecast models were damn near perfect today. We’re predicting shifts with a level of precision we’ve never had before.” His voice is steady, confident. I’m not even trying to listen, but something about the way he talks about that machine rubs me the wrong way.

I roll my eyes, pushing off the side of the truck. Without thinking, I stride toward the group, my boots crunching against the gravel.

“Oh, great, the radar system saved the day again,” I drawl, crossing my arms. “Can’t wait to see it predict the next storm for us. You guys really put all your faith in technology, huh?”

The group turns, but I only look at Scott.

He lifts his gaze from the tablet in his hands, his expression shifting—softer for a second, but guarded. He knows I’m challenging him. I want him to push back.

“It’s not just about the technology,” he says, straightening. “It’s about using every tool we have to stay ahead of the storm. You can’t always trust instincts.”

I huff a quiet laugh, and he looks at me like I’m crazy.

“Tools, sure. But no tech is gonna save you when you’re out there in the field, Scott.” I drop my arms, tilting my head. “Technology can’t feel the wind shift or sense the pressure drop. It’s all numbers and lines on a screen. Your radar won’t help you when your gut tells you it’s time to move.”

Silence stretches between us. The guys around us watch, barely breathing. Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Boone shifting in his seat, but Tyler’s hand on his shoulder keeps him put. I’ve got this.

Scott’s jaw tightens. “So what, you’re saying we should just toss the tech and chase by feel? That’s reckless.” His voice is lower now, but I hear the challenge beneath it.

I narrow my eyes. He’s stubborn. He doesn’t want to admit that when the storm strips everything away, it’s instinct that keeps you alive.

“Not reckless—real,” I shoot back. “It’s about knowing the storm, like it’s a part of you. Out there, all that equipment? Just backup. The real decision-making happens here—” I tap the side of my head. “And here.” I tap my heart. “If you can’t trust those, you’re already dead.”

Scott exhales sharply through his nose. For a second, he clenches his fists—then forces them loose. He steps closer, just enough that I have to tip my chin up.

“Maybe,” he mutters. “But ignoring the data just because you feel something? That’s not smart. Tech works, whether you like it or not. I’m not about to throw it out just because you say so.”

Something flickers in his eyes—something hesitant, like a sliver of doubt cracking through his pride.

I smirk. Gotcha.

“You keep clinging to that radar, Scott,” I say, voice light, teasing. “But you’ll never outsmart a storm if you don’t understand it first. You’ll see.”

I spin on my heel, heading back toward my crew, feeling their eyes on me. When I reach them, they all scramble to look busy.

“Enjoy the show?” I ask, pulling a beer from the cooler.

No one answers, but Boone hides a grin behind his bottle.

A Few Days Later

We don’t do this just for the adrenaline or the content. We do this because people lose everything. Homes vanish, memories scatter, lives upend. We may never fully understand these storms, may never stop them—but we can try. We can warn people. We can offer food, shelter, clothing, whatever support we can.

I’m not supposed to be here. I should be halfway to town, ahead of the storm before it tears through everything in its path. The small town up ahead is about to get hit with the worst twister I’ve ever seen. But instead, I’m parked on the side of the road, watching whatever the hell just went down between Scott and Javi.

And it isn’t pretty.

Javi’s truck tears off down the muddy road, hitting a puddle on the way out, drenching Scott in filthy water before disappearing toward town.

Scott just stands there, soaked and seething. Red to the ears. Hands on his hips, shoulders tight, muscles flexing under his drenched shirt.

Stop it, Lucy. Not the priority right now.

I pull up next to him and kill the engine. Lucky for him, I have one of Tyler’s spare shirts in my glove compartment. Grabbing it, I slide out of the truck and let the door slam shut behind me, tugging my jacket tighter as the wind presses against my skin.

“Didn’t think I’d ever see you stranded on the side of the road,” I say, tucking the shirt behind my back. Might as well tease him before pulling him out of his misery.

Scott exhales sharply through his nose. “Not now, Lucy.”

Oh, the way my name leaves his tongue. Focus, Lucy.

I snort. “Oh, especially now.”

Scott shoots me a glare, but there’s no real hatred in it. Just exhaustion, frustration, maybe a bruised ego. He scrubs a hand over his face, biceps flexing as he drags it down.

“Lucky for you, I have a clean shirt.” I hold it out, for once without any mind games.

Scott hesitates, then takes it, unbuttoning his muddy shirt and flicking it off.

I look away, refusing to give him the satisfaction of catching me staring. But before he pulls the new shirt on, I catch a glimpse of what that awful Storm Par uniform has been hiding.

I open my mouth to say something—because pushing Scott’s buttons has officially become my new favorite hobby—but then something shifts.

A shiver runs down my spine. Subtle, but unmistakable.

The wind isn’t just moving. It’s changing.

Scott is still watching me, but I’m not looking at him anymore. My gaze lifts to the sky, then west. Something about it is wrong. Not dark. Just wrong.

My stomach lurches. Shit.

“Fuck,” I mutter.

Scott frowns. “What?”

My pulse picks up. The sky. The wind. The way the cornfield around us sways first one way, then another.

I hold up a hand, signaling him to shut up. And then I hear it—the low rumble of the monster growing stronger, ready to take everything in its path.

“We need to move.” My voice is firm.

Scott doesn’t budge. “I’m not going anywhere with you.”

“I mean move, Scott!” I snap. “The twister’s shifting course, and we’re in its way.”

“No, it can’t be. The model said—”

“Fuck the models!” Now I’m yelling. “I know these storms. And if we don’t move now, we’re so fucked.”

Scott hesitates. How the hell can he hesitate right now?

“Lucifer, you can’t just—”

I don’t let him finish.

I grab his face and kiss him.

It isn’t soft. It isn’t sweet. It’s a distraction. A way to shut him up before he wastes any more time arguing about my gut feeling. And maybe—just maybe—I’ve wanted to do this for a while.

Scott freezes, breath hitching, then melts into it.

The second I feel him break, I yank back and pull him toward my truck. Shoving him into the passenger seat before he can argue, he slides into the drivers side as I shut the passenger door next to me.

“Drive, Scott!” I shout, throwing the truck into gear.

He’s too stunned to argue.

“We have to go through the field!” I yell over the roar of the storm. I’m ready to fight him on it, but then he takes a sharp left, nearly knocking me into the door.

“Jesus,” I hiss, gripping the dash.

“You said go through the field!”

“I know, but I didn’t think you’d listen on the first try.” The blur of yellow and green whips past us as Scott grips the wheel tighter, knuckles white. The twister is a hungry animal, and we are its prey.

“Left!” I brace myself as he swerves.

“We’re not gonna make it,” Scott mutters, jaw clenched.

“We will if you drive faster, Grandpa!” I shoot back. Then, spotting something ahead, I make a split-second call. “Get us to the barn!”

Scott floors it, but the wind fights us. The twister is right on our heels.

“Brake!”

He slams the pedal. Before I can process it, he grabs my arm and drags me out his side, just as the truck gets sucked into the storm.

“Go!” he yells.

We sprint for the barn, throwing the doors shut behind us. My gaze darts around until I spot what we need. Grabbing a few horse leads, I yank Scott toward the farthest stall.

“Hold on to that door!” I shout.

He doesn’t question me. He wraps a lead around me first, then his own, bracing against the wind.

The barn groans, roof rattling as debris slams into it. The force nearly knocks us off our feet.

I press against the door, hands shaking as I grip the wood. My heart pounds. I risk a glance at Scott—his eyes are wide, muscles straining.

He hasn’t been this close before.

The wind rips at the barn, and my knees buckle.

I try to hold on, but something sharp slices through my leg, tearing my jeans. Blood blooms, but I barely register the pain.

Scott grabs my wrist, yanking me into his chest.

“Lucy!” His voice is raw, panicked.

I barely hear him. My heart is about to explode, ears ringing from the high-pitched wind. I look down at the gash, blood trickling down my calf. The barn groans, shaking with the fury of the storm.

Scott’s grip tightens. I got you.

I fist his shirt with one hand, bracing against the door with the other. The barn shakes harder. My mind screams, Please hold. Please hold.

And then—

The howling wind stops.

The twister, which had been an unstoppable force moments ago, retreats into eerie silence.

I let out a shaky breath.

I’ve been through tornados before. But this one was a beast. And for the first time, I think—maybe—my gut failed me.

Maybe it’s been luck this whole time.

Scott loosens his grip, but not much. My legs threaten to give out, and he catches me, lowering us both to the floor. I straddle his waist, forehead pressing against his. His touch is steady, grounding.

“We’re safe,” his voice rasps.

I don’t even realize I’m shaking until his hands soothe me.

For a moment, everything is still. The world outside has been ripped apart, but in here, in his arms, I can breathe.

“We need to get that leg checked,” he murmurs.

But neither of us moves. Not yet.

After the storm

We manage to get up and walk out of the barn almost unscathed, Scott spots a shelter pop up from the ground, with an elderly man struggling to climb out. Scott helps him and his wife, and as a thank you, the elderly man offers us a ride into town.

I know my crew has to be here. I need to find my family and make sure they're okay.

Once in town, we thank the elderly farmer before Scott helps me out of the truck. “Careful,” he murmurs, his hand steadying my waist as he helps me onto my feet.

“Jesus, Lucy.” I jerk my head up and spot Tyler limping over, relief written all over his face. His eyes dart to my leg, then back to my face, concern flooding his expression. “We need to get that checked out immediately.”

Scott’s face tightens, but before he can react, Tyler is already guiding me away from Scott’s grip and toward the medic tent. “Wait, Scott needs to get looked at too,” I say, turning to look at him.

I’m not sure if Tyler hears me, as he’s already talking to the medic, helping me sit on a stretcher. Tyler turns to Scott, who has quietly followed us. “Is it just the cuts?” Tyler asks. Scott nods, and Tyler gestures toward the next tent. “Minor cuts are being treated in the other tent. Someone will get to you soon.”

I’m about to argue—don’t want to be left alone—but the medic cuts off my jeans at the knee. The gash is on my right leg, just below the knee, and it’s starting to hurt now.

Man, these were my favorite jeans.

I wince as the medic cleans the wound, gripping the stretcher’s handle. “You had us worried sick, Lucy,” Tyler says, stepping back into the tent.

“Not now, Ty,” I grit through my teeth. Every time the medic dabs the wound, it feels like hell.

“We don’t have morphine on hand, so we’ll need to stitch it,” the medic says, looking for my approval.

“God, this is going to hurt,” I mutter, covering my face with my hand and nodding for the medic to go ahead.

“Now you’ve got a matching scar to your new story,” Tyler jokes, but before the medic can pull the needle through, I punch him in the stomach. The moment the needle goes through, I scream. The pain is worse than the damn cut.

I don’t want to feel that type of pain again.

I don’t even remember how I got into my motel room after being treated. I look around—at least this room is nicer than the others we’ve stayed in. White walls, beige bedding, and the smell isn’t too bad. I spot the crutches beside the bed with a note.

“Medic says minimal moving, or you might open your stitches. Only use these if you need to actually move. Call me if you need me, we’re handing out dinners for the town. -Ty.”

Great. I’m all alone.

I don’t even have my phone; it’s in my truck, which got sucked away by the storm. I turn on the TV for a while, but I can’t stop thinking about Scott.

I sigh, carefully grabbing the crutches. Thankfully, my room’s on the first floor, so I don’t have to deal with stairs. I recognize the area from last year when we visited, and I know there’s a bar nearby—if it didn’t get blown away.

It’s only a four-minute walk, but with the crutches, it’s closer to ten. What if Scott’s not there? Part of me knows I’ll find him, but what if I’m wrong again? What if I defy the medic’s orders for nothing and my gut fails me?

The sky is gorgeous—reds and oranges painting the sky, the twister already seeming like a distant memory. A soft wind lingers, cool against my skin, reminding me I didn’t even grab a jacket.

I spot the bar. Immediately, I see Scott. He’s showered and changed into a casual look I haven’t seen him in before. He’s a little further off, leaning against a brick wall, phone pressed to his ear. His posture is tense, but when he sees me, he straightens immediately, hanging up the phone.

“What the hell, Lucy?” he mutters, not believing I’m on my feet. His eyes soften, but I can see the flicker of disbelief in them.

I bet he thinks he’s seeing a ghost. I catch a glimpse of myself before leaving the room—pale, still in the same clothes from earlier—no shower, no change. “I’m fine,” I insist, but even he knows I’m lying. I sit down on one of the benches outside and lean the crutches against the brick wall.

“You’re not fine,” he says softly, crouching down in front of me. His gaze flicks to my leg, where the gash has been stitched closed.

“Like my new jeans? The medic thought the cropped jean on one leg was a fashion statement,” I joke. He doesn’t laugh.

“I needed to get out,” I admit quietly.

Scott places his hand gently on my good leg, tightening his grip briefly before pulling away. He stands up, running a hand across his face, like he’s wondering what to do with me.

“You need to rest. You’re not invincible.”

“I didn’t want to be alone!” I try to yell, but my voice comes out rough. His soft expression makes my words fall flat.

“I get it,” he mutters. “Let’s get you back before your friends find out you disappeared again.” He grabs the crutches with one hand and helps me up, guiding me back toward the motel. Even though I have the crutches, Scott stays close, making sure I don’t fall flat on my ass.

When we make it to my room, I glance over my shoulder and find Scott still hovering. "I’m not leaving you alone," he says.

A smile tugs at my lips as I unlock the door and let him follow me inside. He faces me, his hands on my waist as he carefully helps me sit on the edge of the bed. My body protests as I relax, exhaustion from the storm already catching up with me.

I lock eyes with Scott, and his expression softens, like he’s studying me, as if I’m something delicate about to break.

"You need a shower," he finally says, breaking the silence.

"Jeez, nice way to say a girl stinks, Scott," I tease. "But you’re right." My body feels used and broken, but I’m too tired to move anymore.

Scott scratches the back of his head, hesitating. "I’ll help," he offers, his voice softer than I expect.

I look up at him, about to protest, but I stop myself. I don’t want to be alone. The thoughts in my mind scare me too much.

Scott pulls my bag from the floor and helps me find something comfortable to sleep in. Of course, the only set I have is my small black tank top and booty shorts. I blush as he lays them on the bed and helps me get undressed.

The tension in the room skyrockets. He stands so close, like he’s shielding me. First, my shirt comes off, but he leaves my sheer bralette on for now. His hands hover over my jeans, waiting for my nod of approval.

"I need your words, darling," he murmurs, his voice low and steady.

"Yes," I whisper, my voice soft, vulnerable.

He hums, kneeling down to carefully lower my jeans. "You don’t have to do this. I can manage," I try to say confidently, but my shaky voice betrays me.

Scott stands up but doesn’t pull away. He throws the ripped jeans into the trash and rests his hands on my hips, his thumb brushing over my skin. He leans closer, and my breath catches in my throat.

I whine in desperation as his lips hover over mine, teasing. When his lips finally meet mine, the kiss is slow, tentative. I open my mouth for him, deepening it, feeling the heat between us build. His hand grips the side of my neck as his tongue meets mine, and I moan softly. One of my hands travels from his shoulder to the back of his neck, fingers curling into his hair.

I open my legs to pull him closer, but I cry out as my leg hits his. He pulls away, fear flashing across his face. "Shit, I’m sorry," he says, still holding my waist but looking at my leg.

"Maybe another time," I whisper, pressing kisses to his jaw. "When I don’t have a gash on my leg and we’re not running from a twister." I feel Scott relax at the sound of my laugh. He brushes my hair from my face.

"You got it, darling."

[aylacavebear]

Bloodlines & Fate Chapter 2

Being Touched should have been a blessing—a mark of honor in your lineage, celebrated by your pack since childhood. But to you, it's always made you feel like an outsider, never really fitting in anywhere. Yeah, you had your best friend Jess, but for you, something always felt like it was missing. The land your pack runs on during the full moons brings you a sense of peace you don't fully understand, at first.

Paring: Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader/You

Word Count: 2159

Warning: Angst, longing. Not much that I can think of.

A/N: Professor Robert Zimmerman is based off of The Doctor from Star Trek Voyager, as I absolutely love that character.

A/N: It's my first attempt with an A/B/O fic, be gentle please. I hope you like it. Not sure how many chapters this will be yet.

----------------------------------------- Chapter 2

Two weeks after your fifteenth birthday.

The last six months had flown by, your birthday still a blur of half-remembered moments. At least you hadn’t been paraded around to meet any alphas, and your pack had let you celebrate quietly. Still, the house was suffocating today, packed with family as they celebrated your cousin’s presentation. Too many scents. Too many voices. Too much of everything.

Jess had noticed the tension in your shoulders, the way your scent spiked with unease, and before you could say anything, she grabbed your wrist and pulled you outside. Now, lying on the forest floor, the rich scent of the damp earth filling your lungs, you finally felt like you could breathe again.

“Don’t let it get to you,” Jess murmured, rolling onto her side to face you. Even out here, she could probably still pick up the edges of your stress.

You exhaled a slow breath, watching the canopy above sway in the soft breeze. Sunlight flickered between the leaves, dappling Jess’s face in shifting patches of gold and green. “I know. I just… I can’t help it sometimes. Why couldn’t I just be normal?”

Jess huffed and flopped onto her back beside you. “I like that you’re not normal. Plus, normal is boring,” she said with a grin. 

That pulled a small chuckle from you.  “Let’s talk about something else. Tell me something weird from school.” Jess instantly perked up, her grin turning mischievous. “Remember that boy I told you about? The quiet one with the hazel eyes?”

Her excitement was infectious, the sparkle in her eyes lifting your mood.

“Yeah. Did you talk to him?” you asked, smirking.

Jess scoffed. “No. Boys are weird.” But the way she buried her face in her hands told another story. “I did overhear something, though. The teacher told him that he’s crazy smart, said he could advance in his classes if he actually tried. He wrote this really cool story about the summer his brother presented.”

You propped yourself up on your elbow, raising a brow, “You like him.”

Jess let out a scandalized squeak, her cheeks turning pink. “I do not! He’s just—he’s nice, okay?”

You snorted. “Do you even know his name?”

She groaned and covered her face, “No.”

The admission sent you into another fit of laughter. Jess, who had no fear of standing up to anyone, who could recite entire pages of textbooks from memory, was completely undone by a single boy.

“Well, you should ask him,” you said, still amused but sincere. “From what you’ve told me, he sounds nice”

She sighed and turned her gaze back to the sky. “Maybe one day. I don’t want to like someone and have them not by my soulmate, you know?” 

At that, you laid back down, the warmth of the sun barely reaching through the thick canopy. “Yeah, I know,” you murmured, fingers absentmindedly brushing over the cool grass.

The full moon flashed through your mind—the way the night air had carried your song, the way your soul had stretched toward something unseen. Someone unseen. He had answered you, but you still hadn’t seen him.

That was something that sucked—liking someone before presentation. It was common knowledge among your lineage that everyone found their soulmate or true mate, as some called them. On rare occasions, they would meet before presentation, but that was nearly as rare as the genetic mutation you had. So, you completely understood her predicament.

“Maybe you’re like me,” you suggested quietly after a good while of silence.

Jess turned and looked at you quizzically. “What do you mean?”

“Well, what if this boy is your soulmate? Sometimes soulmates find each other even before presentation, even if it is rare, like what I have,” you explained, still staring at the canopy as the leaves swayed in the gentle breeze.

For a few moments, she stayed quiet, pondering your suggestion before looking back at the canopy. “I don’t want to risk it. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us if we aren’t.” 

That was Jess, always considering others before herself. She had one of the kindest souls you knew. “Just, think about it.” 

—----------------------------------

You woke early on your sixteenth birthday, the habit becoming second nature over the past few months. The house was quiet, bathed in the soft glow of dawn as you slipped out of bed. Something felt different—like the air itself carried a quiet anticipation.

Padding into the kitchen, you froze, puzzled to find both your parents already awake, sipping coffee as if they’d been up for hours. They didn’t have work today.

Your father grinned when he spotted you. “Morning, kiddo.”

“Morning,” you muttered, still groggy as you reached for your own cup. “Why are you two up so early?”

They shared a look—one of those silent exchanges you could never quite decipher—before your dad slid an envelope across the table.

“Happy birthday,” your mom said softly.

Confused, you set your coffee down and picked up the envelope. It had some weight to it, more than just a card inside. But before you could open it, the front door slammed open.

“Oh my god!!” Jess came skidding into the kitchen, breathless and wide-eyed. “We get to go move onto the land.”

Heart pounding, you tore the envelope open. A set of keys clinked onto the table, along with a folded car. Your fingers trembled as you flipped it open. Happy Sweet Sixteen, Y/N.

We’re moving, and so is Jess’s family. You need the land. We know that whatever is there, it brings you more joy than being stuck in the city. It’s already been discussed with the elders, and they have agreed to let both our families become caretakers. Professor Zimmerman has been given special access to continue tutoring you until you graduate. Jess will make the commute to her normal school during the week.

Love, Mom & Dad

The words blurred as tears filled your eyes. You pressed a hand over your mouth, overwhelmed, but Jess was already throwing her arms around you, practically vibrating with excitement.

“We get to live on the land!!” she squealed, trying—and failing—not to shout directly into your ear.

You let out a waterly laugh, hugging her back as warmth spread through your chest. “Thanks, Mom, Dad. This means a lot to me.” Your voice was quiet, thick with emotion. Had you told them about the alpha who answered your song? Nope. And you weren’t planning to, not yet. This gave you the chance to explore, to follow the pull that had been lingering at the edges of your senses since that full moon.

The move happened fast. Within a week, the pack had rallied together, helping both your family and Jess’s transition to the land. Boxes were carried, furniture was set up, and before you knew it, you were standing in the doorway of your new home, inhaling the rich scent of pine, sap, and freshly hewn wood. Your family’s cabin was beautiful—newly built, crafted from the very trees that surrounded you. Just twenty feet away, Jess’s family had an identical one, nestled beneath the thick canopy of the forest.

Inside, the space was simple but perfect. The scent of the earth clung to the wooden walls, grounding you in a way that city air never could. Your room was upstairs, tucked away on the far side of the house, with a window seat positioned against the outer wall. When you sat there, you had a perfect view of the forest stretching beyond, the place where you had first heard him.

Movement in your peripheral caught your eye. Across the way, through the window of the other cabin, Jess was perched on her own window seat, grinning like an idiot as she waved emphatically at you.

You laughed, shaking your head, but waved back before dropping your backpack on the bed. Taking a slow breath, you let your fingers trace over the solid pine desk, the dresser, the smooth carvings of the nightstand—all made from the forest that would now be your home. This was where you were meant to be. You could feel it in your bones.

Within a week, the last of the boxes had been unpacked, and life settled into an easy rhythm. Each morning, you saw Jess off as she caught the bus into town for school, and every afternoon, you met her when she returned. The two of you fell into step on the walk back to the cabins, trading stories about your day—hers filled with school gossip and pop quizzes, yours with lessons and discoveries that made your mind buzz.

Professor Zimmerman’s first visit to the land was almost comical in its weight. He was one of only a handful of outsiders granted access, and you could tell he understood the privilege. The reverence in his gaze, the way he took in every detail of the land, humbled by the trust placed in him—it made you respect him even more.

Your lessons took place in a designated cabin, a space that felt more like a sanctuary than a classroom. The walls were lined with maps—of the world, of shifting territories, of forgotten histories. Timelines stretched across one side, chronicling events that shaped civilization. A pair of towering bookshelves housed tomes that looked older than your parents, filled with knowledge you were just beginning to scratch the surface of. And then there were the books Professor Zimmerman brought just for you—college-level texts, subjects he thought would challenge and inspire you.

One afternoon, after lunch, he leaned back in his chair, studying you thoughtfully. “Have you given any thought to what you’d like to major in?” 

The question caught you off guard. You were graduating early, but you hadn’t let yourself think too far ahead. “I think I want to take a couple of years off first,” you admitted, setting your pend down. “Just… breathe for a while.”

His lips twitched in a small, knowing smile. “That’s a wise choice. Burnout is real, and it’s good to step back when you need to.” His voice carried that quiet understanding you’d come to appreciate. “When you’re ready, I’ll be here to help.”

“Thanks,” you replied, grateful, before going back to your current lesson.

—---------------------------

The first full moon on the land was different.

The pull was stronger, more insistent, as if something in the air had shifted. You felt it in your soul, in the way your skin tingled with anticipation. It took everything in you to wait—to let the pack splinter off into their groups, to let their howls fade into the distance—before slipping away into the night. Barefoot, you ran.

The earth was cool beneath your feet, the whisper of wind through the trees urging you forward. Your wolf stirred inside you, pressing against the barrier that kept her at bay. She couldn’t break through, but that didn’t stop her from trying.

Moonlight spilled through the canopy in scattered beams, illuminating the forest floor in silvery light. Unlike others, you saw the world in shades of gray at night—an advantage gifted by your genetic mutation. Every branch, every shift in the terrain was crisp, as if the moon itself was guiding you.

By the time you slowed to a walk, the air around you felt different. Lighter. Quieter. You’d gone further than before, farther than you ever had, but you weren’t afraid.

The trees thinned here, allowing the full moon to cast its glow uninterrupted. Ferns swayed in the gentle breeze, brushing against your bare calves as you stepped forward. You closed your eyes, tilting your face toward the sky, and let your song rise into the night.

It carried everything—longing, uncertainty, the ache of questions to big for words.

And, just like every night before, he answered.

A howl, deep and resonant, echoed through the trees.

But this time, it was closer.

Your heart pounded as you scanned the darkness, searching for movement, for a shadow between the trees. He was near. Maybe you had moved toward him, or maybe he had been closing the distance all along. Either way, you weren’t ready—not yet.

The words from the files echoed in your mind.

Do I want to meet my soulmate now? I’m only sixteen. How will my life change? Will I still get to be a teenager, or will all that be over the moment I see him?

Doubt coiled in your stomach, tightening around the edges of something raw and unspoken. You exhaled, long and slow, before turning back the way you came. The walk home was easy, your feet finding the path even as your mind remained tangled in thoughts.

By the time you reached your cabin, your decision was made. You would take the next two years for yourself. Maybe it was selfish. Maybe he was waiting, just as unsure as you were. But this time was yours, and you weren’t ready to give it up. Not yet.

----------------------------------------- Chapter 3

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[babydollslibrary]

OURS — TREVOR ZEGRAS

trevor zegras x fem!reader

published: September 4th, 2023

summary: in which y/n and Trevor’s relationship is constantly being criticized by outsiders but they know their love is real.

warnings: references to nsfw activities, hate from outsiders, dialogue heavy, not proofread

it seems like there’s always someone who disapproves of Trevor and i’s relationship.

my parents don’t like his carefree and confident demeanor. his younger brother didn’t trust me because i was someone new. his friends didn’t like that i write songs about exes and my relationships.

but most of all his fans and the media, judge us like they know us personally.

mostly judging me.

as a singer, my every move was criticized and picked apart. what i wore was either too homely or too dressed up. i was too skinny or too big. my heels were too tall, but then my nike’s were too ‘tom-boyish’. but the judgement had only seemed to get worse once i started dating Trevor.

suddenly his fans were saying i wasn’t good enough for him. analyzing our body language in photos and claiming that i didn’t act like i liked him. saying i was using him to further my fame.

but on the other side, i had my fans commenting that i was too good for him. citing his previous playboy ways and saying that he wasn’t smart enough or mature enough for me. claiming his bad boy attitude drew me in and that i would ‘come to my senses’ soon.

***

y/nofficial

liked by trevorzegras, gracieabrams, and 151,308 others

y/nofficial summer with my boy toy <3

tagged trevorzegras

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trevorzegras my beautiful girl, you were off to a great start in the beginning and then you added the last photo

y/nofficial wdym? i think that ones my favorite!

trevorzegras whatever floats your boat mamas

gracieabrams cutest couple in the world ♥️

y/nofficial you’re the real loml <3

gracieabrams shhh i thought we weren’t telling trevor?

user26 NEW MUSIC COMING SOON?!

user81 i wonder if it’s about Trevor

jackhughes was i cut out of the last pic?! i thought you loved me, y/n 😪

y/nofficial in the wise words of Ariana Grande “you ain’t my boyfriend”

user40 the way she’s leaning away from him in the 5th pic? oh she’s over him

user95 she’s finally over the bad boy thing, i guess

user02 thank god! i don’t want her to get hurt!

user73 @/user02 HER to get hurt?! she’s gonna end up writing a slandering song about my baby Trevor and painting him to be an asshole

user02 @/user73 lmao yeah, well the shoe fits. why shouldn’t she write a song showcasing his true colors?

user73 @/user02 i’m not about to fight with a Y/N stan of all people— have fun supporting your famefucker

user02 @/user73 oh please, she doesn't need to use your little hockey asshole for fame when she’s already more well known than him

user12 we love a PR relationship 🫶

***

my converse squeak against the marble floors as i leave my execs meeting, catching the attention of many up and coming artists that are waiting in the lobby. i can feel their gazes following my every move, from when i stop in front of the elevator to when i press the down button, and i can’t help but laugh in my head; reminiscing of when i was the same way. star-struck and in awe whenever i saw any artists leaving the same doors i just walked out of.

but now, having been in the business for two years, that feeling has come and gone, replaced by small talk with those very same people that i once looked up to.

“hi.” i smile politely at a redheaded girl that sits close to the elevators, a notebook in her hand and stars in her eyes.

she looks around, as if searching, before she lets out an awkward chuckle. “oh- hi!”

the elevator dings twice before the doors open to another crowd of wannabe pop stars, and i step aside to let them out before waving a goodbye to the doe-eyed redhead and stepping into the elevator.

i’m excited to get back to my boyfriend, but that excitement vanishes when i scroll through twitter on my uber home.

—

—

oh- that was fast.

i can’t help but scroll through the replies and quote tweets, and by the time i arrive back home, i’m disheartened to say the least.

i thought i was being nice by greeting her? even if i couldn’t stay and talk. but apparently i should take this as a lesson for the future, don’t say hi to anyone unless i can stay and chat.

and my mood only worsens when i make it into the house, calling out my boyfriend’s name, to which i get no response.

“Trev?” my voice echoes off the walls of our home as i step into our bedroom, in search of the six foot tall hockey player. but i come up empty, finding that he still isn’t home from training camp.

i slide my phone from my pocket, drafting up a text before ultimately trying my luck at a phone call instead.

the outgoing ring reaches my ear twice before it stops, the call picking up.

“hey babe, what’s up?” Trevor’s tone is light and airy, painting an immediate smile across my lips.

“hey, i was just checking in.” i sit upon the fuzzy white blanket that’s folded along the foot of our bed, running my hands over the soft fabric. “i thought training was supposed to end at noon?”

“oh, yeah, it did.” he confirms, and i can hear someone else talking in the background. “Jimbo and i decided to grab lunch and catch up a bit.”

“oh, okay.” i nod, despite the fact that he can’t see me, and i can hear him conversing with someone.

“shh. hold on.” he tells someone. “he wants to say hi.”

i laugh as Jamie’s voice comes through the line. “HEY Y/N!!!”

“hi Jame!” i reply, listening as he grunts, wrestling the phone from Trevor, i assume.

“i’ve missed you!” he sounds closer now, while Trevor sounds farther away, calling out for his phone back, confirming my suspicions. “when do i get to see you again?”

“i’ve missed you too. if it’s alright with Trevor, and if you’re free, you can come over for dinner tonight?” i tell him. “i can go to the store and grab stuff to make my garlic and basil chicken pasta.”

“oh my favorite! i’m in! i don’t care what Trevor has to say about it, to be honest.” his response causes me to laugh, while my boyfriends calls out an offended ‘hey!’

“see you later!��� Jamie yells, as i assume Trevor gets his phone back.

“did you need anything else, babe?” Trevor asks distractedly.

“no, nothin’ else.” i stand, gathering my car keys from my nightstand. “actually, i’m gonna go grocery shopping, can you think of anything we need?”

“condoms,” he replies unabashed, and i blush at the thought that Jamie heard him. “and frosted flakes. i finished ‘em off this morning.”

i roll my eyes before teasing, “the condoms or the frosted flakes?”

“both.” my skin heats up at the reminder of our morning activities, Trevor having woken me up before the sun even came up.

“oh- uh- okay.” Trevor laughs as i stumble over my words. “i’ll grab some more…of both.”

“thanks, love you!” he waits for my reply before hanging up, and i pad out of the bedroom, slipping my shoes back on by the front door before heading out to my car. i wasn’t big on driving, usually letting Trevor take that responsibility, and avoiding it when possible, so i only really used it when i had to go grocery shopping, relying on ubers to go anywhere else.

i slip into the drivers seat, huffing when i find that Trevor messed with my seat again. a harmless prank he likes to pull, just to see when i drive again and if i’ll notice. i adjust my seat before i pull out of the driveway, the radio playing faintly to fill the silence.

*

i’m nearly done with my shopping trip when it happens.

“he still uses those?” i’m mid-tossing the family size box of Frosted Flakes in the cart when the words reach my ears, and at first, i don’t even notice they’re being spoken to me. “he always said it felt like he was wearing nothing.”

i glance over to find a tall blonde standing next to my cart, staring down at my items.

“i’m sorry?” my brows furrow in confusion.

“oh- the condoms. Skyn Elite? Trevor used them back when he and i used to hook up a couple years ago.” the girl smiles, the supermarket lights reflecting off her sparkly lip gloss. “you’re his new conquest, right? y/n?”

“i’m his girlfriend, yes.” i nod, pursing my lips together in a straight line.

“right,” she nods. “girlfriend. you got the envied title.”

“i guess so.”

she gives another falsely innocent smile. “good luck keeping it! he’s insatiable, is he not? seemed like he was always keeping an eye out for the next girl.”

i’ve never particularly cared about the ghosts of Trevor’s hookup past. why would i be? i had them too, so who was i to be bothered by his? besides, right now, he’s mine. i’m the one he comes home to; the one he loves and talks about a future with.

“well, i should get going.” i tell her, already beginning to push the cart towards the end of the aisle, in route to check out. “it was nice to meet you.”

i was lying, sure, but i wasn’t going to let her get to me.

she bids me goodbye as i walk away, and when i glance back, i see her faux smile drop, her eyes rolling as she sneers, turning the other way.

yeah, i pretty much expected that.

*

i’ve just made it into the kitchen, dropping the grocery bags onto the counter, when my phone begins to ring, buzzing in my pocket with an incoming call.

i do an awkward dance of trying to free my hand from a twisted bag handle, before retrieving the vibrating device from my pocket, my fathers contact taking up the screen. pressing accept, i hold the phone up to my ear.

“hey, dad!” i chirp, opening the refrigerator to begin unloading the food.

“hey, pumpkin. what are you up to?” his voice drifts in my ear as i put away a gallon of milk.

“just unloading groceries.” i inform him. “what are you and mom doing?”

“oh, nothing.” he sighs. “just missing our little girl.”

i laugh at his dramatics.

“i know, i need to come visit.” i stuff a few cartons of berries and a bag of grapes into the fruit drawer before shutting the fridge.

“so catch me up, honey. what’s new?”

“nothing really. i’m working on some new music, and i had an exec meeting this morning to discuss how the album is coming. but other than that it’s same old same old.”

i open the cupboard, taking care of the box of cereal and a couple bags of chips as i speak.

“and you’re still dating the uh…” he trails off. “the one with the tattoos?”

i can hear the disapproval oozing from his voice and my eyes roll in my head.

“Trevor, yes.” i confirm, walking down the hallway to our bedroom and placing a few things on Trevor’s nightstand before setting a new bottle of shampoo on our bathroom counter.

“yeah, him.” he sneers, and it’s then that i hear the front door open, two sets of footsteps reaching my ears. a smile spreads across my face as Trevor calls out my name. “i don’t understand why anyone would do that to their body. that’s permanent, ya know.”

“mhm.” i hum in disinterest. “hey, dad, i gotta go. i’ll call you later.”

“oh alright, honey. love you!”

“love you too.” i hang up the phone as Trevor steps into the room, smiling at the sight of me.

“there you are.” he beams. his arms snake around my waist, pulling me against him, and his head dips down to bring his lips to mine.

“here i am.” i mumble against his lips, causing a chuckle to arise from his throat.

“Jamie is in the living room. followed me home claiming that he had to see you.” he tells me, his eyes lighting up at the mention of his close friend.

“yeah, i invited him over for dinner.” i inform him. my hands cup the back of his neck, pulling him back down for another kiss.

my whole body relaxes, any tension disappearing when his lips meet mine. his eyes scan my face as he pulls away, and his faces falls, his lips forming an exaggerated frown.

“what’s wrong?” he whispers, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear before pulling my head to his chest.

his heartbeat echoes in my head, calming me immensely.

“nothing.” i mutter, my eyes falling shut when he begins rubbing circles on my back.

“i don’t believe you.”

“it’s nothing, really.” i insist. “nothing that’s actually bothering me. just a little annoyed.”

“what annoyed you, baby?” he sways us back and forth and his hand on my back trails down to tickle at my side, making me giggle.

“well,” i sigh and he pushes me back to look into my face. “i said hi to a girl at warner today-”

he hums, encouraging me to keep talking.

“but it was just a quick ‘hi’. apparently she’s a fan of yours, and she thought it was rude of me to greet her and then not stay and chat.” i explain. “so she took to twitter to say so.”

Trevor huffs, his nose scrunching in annoyance. “well that’s just stupid. you don’t owe anyone a conversation…. except me. because you love me, obviously.”

i laugh at his joke, making his face light up at his successful attempt to cheer me up.

“what else, baby?”

“well then, at the store, i ran into one of your ex-hookups.” i continue, and his brows thread together in confusion.

“which, ya know, doesn’t bother me.” i clarify. “but she made a comment on the condoms we use and implied that our relationship wouldn’t last long.”

“our love is not hers to speculate on.” he gruffs out in annoyance, and i nod along.

“i know. so i walked away.”

“i’m proud of you, love.” he presses a kiss to my forehead, a smile resting upon my face as he does. “is that all?”

“almost.” i breathe out. “then i got home, and my dad called as i was putting away the groceries.”

“okay.” he nods, obviously confused why i would be annoyed about my father calling.

“and he made some snide remarks about your tattoos.” Trevor barks out a laugh at that, quite used to people commenting on the art that adorns his skin.

“i ignored them, and hung up pretty much right after, because you got home. but, i just wish he could look past them, because then maybe he’d see the kind, funny guy that you are and understand why i’ve given my heart to you.”

his eyes squint as he grins at my words, bending his neck to pepper kisses across my nose and cheeks. i squeal at the affection and he pulls back to look me in the eyes.

“baby, i don’t care what your dad thinks of me. only that you like me. and i’m pretty sure that you love me just the way i am.”

i nod, biting my lip and holding back a smile. my cheeks turn hot, a blush settling over them, and he smirks at the sight.

“i don’t want you to worry your pretty little mind, baby.” he coos. “so someone was wrongfully upset that you didn’t take time out of your day to talk to them— who cares? people like to throw rocks at things that shine. and you, my darling, shine so beautifully bright. they’re just jealous.”

i roll my eyes at his cheesy statement, but the sentiment warms my heart. “thank you, Trev.”

“any time, baby.” he pulls me in for another hug, my head resting on his chest again. “our love is ours. nobody else’s. what other people have to say about it, and about us, doesn’t matter.

“your hands belong in mine, my heart belongs to yours, and no matter what life throws at us, i’m by your side.”

i open my mouth to respond, but i’m cut off by another voice.

“aww, that was sweet.”

i lift my head from Trevor’s chest, our heads both turning towards the entrance to our bedroom to find Jamie standing there with a cheesy smile.

“Jimmy, what are you doing in here?” Trevor lets out a wheezy laugh at his friend, his head dropping back and his shoulders shaking. the sound is like music to my ears.

this man.

i am so irrevocably in love with him.

“i got bored.” Jamie shrugs. “you guys were taking forever.”

[kalied0skull]

I'm just getting this out there before i panic over not getting it done today .. . :3

would like to thank @broareweabouttoviberightnow for feeding the brain with another banger song to think about stevepop to .. specifically with transfem soda ... .

the song in question : Look At That Woman — Role Model ♪

and as always ...

★ ramble under the cut !

i picked the worst time to actually get to this because i am actually so exhausted i think i could pass out whilst writing this AND OH MY GOODNESS CAAAAT okay sorry my friends cat came to say hello

anyhow, i did NOT stick to the proper order of lyrics here (because I trimmed some out to fit the comic better) and I don't know how much i enjoy that fact 💀

but these sets of verses had the biggest visuals to me, and i definitely just ran with it

when thinking about this song, i thought a lot about how i could kind of twist the story and make it fit a bit and came up with a really silly au sort of storyline:

I'm not the best with storyboarding obviously, and the comic definitely shows that bc it seems a bit .. .. weirdly organized BUT LET ME EXPLAIN IT OKAY MAN

i love to imagine this song as transfem soda going off and doing her own thing while steve's off for college, their relationship is going steady and yet steve can't help but overthink about the distance — the fact he has to send letters to soda now instead of just seeing her every other day at the DX or the curtis home. it makes him anxious, and he kind of just throws himself around over missing his girlfriend

the rest of the song is very descriptive well in terms of visualizing transfem soda, and i wish i could've focused on it but unfortunately it seemed a bit silly to just make a drawing purely only for her outfit for this comic 😭 (i probably WILL make a drawing though, nonetheless)

there's just something real entertaining about the idea of steve being the one leaving, and feeling overwhelmed with some kind of guilt because he misses his gal. he's definitely not the type to enjoy long distance relationships, and he's gonna have to whether he likes it or not!!!

thankfully though, soda is a loving girl and cares about steve nonetheless no matter the distance, and she's constantly sending him letters. she doesn't even mind if he doesn't reply to them (he overthinks the replies, too (see the papers on his floors /silly))

the "memory" scene was kind of just me trying to figure out how to display the lyrics in an organized way, and it ended up being a bit of a 'goodbye' scene between the two as soda drops steve off at the airport with his first ever letter — and i like to aaaalso imagine that letter absolutely ruins him permanently in terms of just REALIZING how much he's gonna miss her 💀

steve's got a bunch to stress over — missing his girl, not being able to see his girl, college work, his dorm mates, his dad bitching his ear off still, the guys who might try and dig at his girl — he'll worry about all the stuff soda sends in his letters, and even though soda tells him and reassures that he doesn't have to reply back, steve will ALWAYS send home something to her.

'trying to call, but the leaves start to fall' is a major line for that, just because i think he absolutely does just... struggle with words – and of course, it's fall !!!

iiii dunno, I'm kind of droning on here since I can't form proper sentences at the moment (I'll probably be sleeping right after this 💀) but i really thought this song was pretty neat ... and i had a lot of fun making something way more extra than necessary for it ... hehehe

[vespidclan]

Idk why but Sparkbreak ( 500 ) from the Roleswap seems like the type of " player " that resets a bunch of times for the " best outcome " or will reset if their favorite character/cat dies in a patrol or moon skip.

That probably sounds insane so let me explain. Moth ( 404 ) seems to have the type of playstyle of someone who's trying to tell a story/stick to a certain rule list like for challenges. Ik it's all to make cat's suffer but she's very methodical ( like cm only players interested in story lore would headcannon their rng kitty to have psychology broken at the sight of their God and then moon reset until they get the Kill Yourself prompt (( now that I say that that sounds like shade at you I promise it's not )) )

But Spark ( 500 ) would have the playstyle of getting to attached to every cat within the small clan and not wanting anything to happen to them, so I see him resetting moons that have death in them, resetting when a patrol outcome results in injury/death, and other odd things ( like if the clans prey stores are low just coding in more or even turning it completely off ).

But tbh thinking about it this way, I'd hate ro like in a 500 world. Could you imagine watching a friend/sibling/parent/partner die right in front of you? Then in an instant your back in your nest at the start of the day and they come in the den bringing you food like always. You never starve because the pile is always full, but you take note that it's always full, and that even if every cat was hunting at all times, they still couldn't catch that much. You feel like you should've been dead a long time ago. You're an elder that's surpassed life expectancy, you're suffering but something won't let you die. You're his daughter, he'd never hurt you, but in helping you he is.

Sorry for the ramble I'm mentally ill

I liked reading this! And this is an interesting idea for reverse Spark/500 in the sense that he’s the opposite of 404. Maybe instead of becoming hateful of everyone and himself he sees it as an opportunity to protect everyone he loves from what horrors he’s witnessed, and not 404’s differing mindset of wanting to break others down because of the mentioned horrors.

This has its drawbacks of course—the cats in the clan, the favored ones at least, will basically be invincible to any obstacle. They’re healthy and well fed. They will have no memory of dying or being in pain because 500 made sure they could never die. Imagine if they saw someone they loved die, and in the next moon, they’re suddenly conversing with you like it never happened. Everything is perfect, but too perfect, in an uncanny and fake way. Maybe your inferior mind can’t pinpoint exactly what’s wrong with your life, but something is definitely not right.

What if 500 picks favorites like the ‘favoriting’ system the actual game has? What does he do with the cats he doesn’t like? Would Out Of Bounds be turned into a prison for those cats if they end up dead? Would he cause their deaths to stay out of their ‘perfect clan’? How would 500 deem which cat is more favorable? He’s extremely protective to who he loves… and that’s his biggest flaw. Everyone else will languish, because to him, that’s the way it should be for them.

Or think of this! If he really wants to… he could alter a cat completely. New personality, appearance, quirks, a completely different cat, and everything would change to fit his view so that you’re the ‘ideal version’. One moment, you’re yourself. Next moment, you’re unrecognizable to yourself. Good for him, probably good for others, but for you? You would never know.

So what we’re getting at is; 404 and 500’s way of managing the game is just another example of dystopias and utopias… Neither are favorable but that’s what’s fun! Two sides of the same coin, meddling with something that they shouldn’t in order to benefit themselves… I think they’d fit this song really well actually.

I did base his design off of AM! Since it’s something I didn’t really do for 404 and I still want him to be based off of the same things that inspired 404, but just enough so that he’s his own thing. His original sketch had him look way more similar to him, but I went for a more cat-like look instead

[cruyuu]

hello 💕 love your sukuita analyses and edits 🙏 my friend and i were looking through Gege's official chosen songs for each character specifically for yuji and sukuna now that the manga is over and i don't know if many people noticed Yujis first song was "Heart ni Ho wo Tsukete" and the lyrics are??????? literally canon sukuita 😭 "burn your loneliness" "don't turn to ashes" "you and i are together" "will we love each other? will we turn to ashes?" like 😭😭😭 if you haven't checked it out please do because we were losing it

Hi jenjen and thank you!

I already heard Heart ni Ho wo Tsukete and I agree. The lyrics are crazy. The song is quite beautiful, tho, shipping aside.

As someone who loves looking into stuff and finding connections, it's interesting to me that a character song is hinting at having a deep emotional connection with someone as a way of pushing on through the worst of "the worringly bad state they are in".

Sure, some would say "It doesn't have to mean that" as in "It doesn't have to be abt sukuita" but I like to think that it does because it's not like the story itself relied heavily on Sukuna and Yuuji- beginning with their reluctant union and ending with their parting- right? It's not like Yuuji taught Sukuna something about love and managed to reach him, right? That definitely didn't happen lmfao.

Also... how do you even begin to explain these lines?

I’m attached Deeply attached to you It doesn’t go in a single line I’m attached to you And the lies we tell each other

Remember that this is coming from a song picked for Yuuji, so it's supposed to represent him. Who is he deeply attached to, so much so that the attachment he shares with that person "doesn't just go in single line"? Who does he tell lies to?

Who, again, said he'd do anything to kill that creep and then asked for his return to his body, said that he is the only one who can accept him and would live with him?

It's all so mind-numbingly sweet, very confusing and terribly funny. It makes me want to hurl myself off a cliff. Gaze into the sunset with the cigarette in my hands and just sigh like I'm seventy thousand years old. It makes me want to squeal, screech and not at all act composed like I usually am.

Like, sukuita's relationship has been at the very center of the story even if it was out of focus for a while. Yuuji was with others and Sukuna was with others but then when they met again... those others just couldn't compete. One of my friends joked that they're lowkey that sentence "I have been looking for you in other people only to realize you've been right in front of me this entire time." and I can't help but giggle. Hell, the story itself is proof of it lol

Like I keep mentioning in my posts, these two tend to just act weirdly around each other. It's not even "just hate", neither "indifference", because everything that Yuuji did made him reluctant to part with Sukuna in the end, and no matter how much Sukuna dismisses Yuuji, he's also praising him and acknowledging him over and over and over. Yes, they can't see eye to eye, yes, they're fundamentally different from one another but Yuuji still managed to try and understand him. Sukuna also ended up accepting Yuuji's viewpoint and considered taking on a different path, finally changing after years of remaining stuck in a single mindset.

Like not one person had managed to change his mindset for all those years yet Yuuji- the idiot, brat, thing, whatever- did. In just a couple of months lol. That was the final seal on just how important he was to him in the end. The only one to beat him, the only one to reach him, the only one to come running back with arms open to still allow him to live no matter if he destroyed everything in his life.

Lol.

Which brings me to:

If we burn our union If we burn everything Won’t we love each other? Won’t we love each other? Won’t it become ash?

It fits them all too well. Love under the guise of hate, killing as an expression of love, hate as an expression of fondness. Everything flipped onto its head because, after all, aren't they too, (from human to curse in Yuuji's case, from curse to human in Sukuna's) when around each other?

I swear figuring out these two (and, in general, just trying to think about their relationship or write an analysis) makes me want to bang my head against the wall. All I'm saying is, if Gege ever goes to create a tragic romance manga, they have my full support because they knew what they were doing, twisting and intertwining these two to perfection before they ripped them away. They made them so entertaining, both as individual characters and when they collided with each other.

Yeah. I despise it here (affectionately).

I hope both you and your friend have an amazing day or night and thank you for the ask!

[weilongfu]

"You smell different today," Thame said as he curled around Po's back in the early morning sunlight. "Why haven't you smelled like this before?"

Po scrunched up his nose. "I didn't do anything, maybe something is funny with your nose today."

"Na.... P'Po..." Thame nuzzled under Po's ear and Po shivered in a way that was becoming too common. The soft touch of Thame with his alpha smell of warm cotton and leather was becoming near pavlovian. "Maybe we should stay in today..." Thame's hand rested on Po's waist as his thumb rubbed his hip bone.

Po felt a spike of heat in his gut and turned to face Thame, but hid his frown. "And have Dylan be mad at me because you missed recording the guide track for MARS' new song?"

"Well..."

"Go take a shower and wash the funny smell out of your nose," Po said before kissing Thame carefully.

"Shower with me?" Thame asked between slower pecks on lips, cheeks, and forehead.

"Thame-"

With one final kiss, Thame gracefully rolled out of bed into a stretch before heading to Po's bathroom. Once he was out of sight, Po pulled open his bedside table drawer. Two pill bottles greeted him and Po shook both before frowning at last. The birth control pills rattled in their bottle but the heat suppressants remained quiet

"When did I..." Another, smaller, wave of heat rolled through Po's body before he swallowed down the one pill he did have while picking up his phone and ordering a refill on his pharmacy app. As Thame started vocal exercises in the shower, Po took a calming breath. "It'll be fine. He'll be out all day and I can come home early, pick up my suppressants and he'll never know."

After a quick shared shower where Po did his best to keep Thame's hands and his own where both could see them, the day started as normal. Thame took his taxi to the newly created SYNC offices and Po took his to Uncle Joei's tailor shop. This was apparently all the normalcy the universe could afford as Uncle Joei's shop was suddenly busy with a party of ten, a groom and his groomsmen, all wanting tuxedos for a Western style wedding. This was swiftly followed by a call from Nano to the shop, asking for fabric swatches for the next set of suits for MARS since the first set went over so well on social media. Po suspected the credit on the photos was what had lead to an uptick in Uncle Joei's business.

"Ah... I picked them out already nong," Uncle Joei said happily into the phone. "I'll have N'Po bring them over, yes?"

"Oh that would be perfect," Nano replied with the same enthusiasm. "Do you mind if we send him back after lunch?"

"Of course not, of course not. We probably won't see a big surge of customers again, it's usually pick-ups and fittings in the afternoon." Uncle Joei turned to Po. "Your friends want to treat you to lunch after you drop off the swatches. Just let me know when you're on your way back."

Po blotted the sweat beginning to bead on his brow with a handkerchief which made Uncle Joei's smile change just a bit. "I'll head out now then."

"Go, go, I'll tell them." As Po picked up the swatches and left, Uncle Joei turned to the phone again, "N'Nano? I think N'Po might not make it to lunch..."

As it turned out, Po barely made it to SYNC. Despite the copious amounts of neutralizing spray he'd picked up and applied on the way to the shop, Po felt eyes on his body following him. The hood over his head and light scarf around his neck did nothing to restrain what was becoming a large amount of pheromones. Po checked his phone, the pharmacy had still not refilled his prescription.

"P'Po! Have you been waiting long?" Nano said as he came down to the building lobby to escort Po up. "Aren't you hot covered up like that?"

"I'm..." Po fought the urge to resist as Nano helped uncover him. The first burst of air conditioning over his heated skin made him shiver. "Well, yes, thank you."

Nano's nose twitched and Po pretended to ignore it. As a fellow omega, Nano wouldn't do anything ridiculous over Po smelling like his heat was coming in. At least not in public. "Come on up, P'Thame has been unbearable he keeps whining about how he had to record the guide track instead of staying home with you." Po sighed and Nano giggled as he pulled Po to the elevator. "Anyway, we're almost done for the morning so we can all go have a nice lunch and catch up."

Po smiled. "You saw me three days ago at the group house."

"But that was three days ago! A lot has changed, like P'Jun and P'Dylan haven't been in each other's faces lately and I think-"

Po let Nano's chatter wash over him as he tried to control his breathing, unable to see the way Nano's eyes kept darting over him. When the elevator opened once more, Thame was waiting for them. Po tried to meet his eyes and saw them widen.

"P'Po, are you-"

"P'Thame, you better take him home," Nano cut in.

"Nano!" Po gave the smaller boy a nudge. "You-"

"I'll call Uncle and tell him you won't be back, he suspected you weren't feeling well," Nano said as he hopped out of the elevator for Thame to take his place and immediately put his arm around Po's waist to help support him. "Bye bye P'Po! I'll grab the swatches from you next time! P'Thame, you better take good care of him!"

"I always do," Thame said while looking into Po's eyes and pressing buttons. Po turned to face him, but the only thing that flashed before his eyes was Earn's disgusted face.

"It smells so bad, like pool chlorine!"

"Thame, I-"

"I called a car service in advance. It's parked in the parking lot and I'll return the car later," Thame said as he guided Po by the waist, always gentle, never forceful. "Just you and me."

Po allowed himself to be nudged, herded, seat buckled, and driven home. Thame continued to give Po what were presumed to be his usual loving glances, supported by the holding of hands at stoplights and traffic halts, but Po could barely feel them, lost in the memory of his last heat off suppressants.

"Earn," Po said quietly. "If it bothers you that much-"

"Of course it does! Your heat smell is awful, it smells so bad, like pool chlorine!" Earn huffed. "But what else am I supposed to do, I'm your boyfriend."

"I didn't say you have to stay and help."

"Or what? You'll go ask someone else?"

"I can just handle it myself, I've done it before while you've been away at conferences or giving presentations."

"And you'll stink up the house!"

"Then maybe you should leave the house for now," Po said quietly. "And I'll make sure it's aired out before you come back."

Earn did not come back.

"P'Po?" Thame said as he gently shook Po. "We're here. Do you need me to-"

"I can get inside," Po said firmly. "You can go back to-" Po stopped as Thame was already by his side, helping him out of the car. Po felt his knees wobble, unsure if it was the oncoming of his heat or the way his body normally reacted when Thame did something stupidly romantic.

"I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to leave."

"I'm not going to tell you," Po said as they walked into the condo lobby. "Most alphas choose to leave."

"Most alphas or just your ex?" Thame mused as they waited for the elevator. "After meeting Earn, I have to say I think it's the latter."

"I thought you didn't do alpha pissing contests," Po said as they finally stepped into his condo.

"Oh, no pissing was involved." Thame said as he locked the door before walking with Po to the bedroom. "He did stop me in the bathroom, but I was already done." Thame watched at a distance as Po removed some of the outer layers of his clothing, the heat smell intensifying. "I took the measure of him another way and it was... educational."

Po scoffed and leaned back against the headboard of the bed. "Thame-"

"Can I stay?" Thame asked quietly as he took a step closer. "Can I spend this heat with you?"

Po pulled up the blanket around himself despite how it felt unbearably hot. "...doesn't it smell bad?"

"What smells bad? Your heat scent?" Thame tilted his head and Po nodded. "Who said it smells bad? Earn?"

"He used to complain all the time when we shared heats until we stopped." Po looked to the side. "He said I smelled like concentrated pool chlorine and that... it got worse when he-"

"He's dumb and his nose is bad," Thame said as he took another small step which earned him side eye. "You smell so nice, like the beach on a nice day. You smell like salt and sun and happiness." Thame sat on the edge of the bed and Po allowed it. "I like everything about P'Po so much, I can't imagine a situation where I'd think you smell bad." Thame nudged himself closer and opened his arms. Po allowed himself the comfort of them. "I can't imagine what it's like to have so many heats with a partner like that," Thame said as he rubbed Po's back and kissed his neck. Po grumbled in warning and Thame only resumed rubbing Po's back. "But I'm not Earn. Even if it's not this heat, the next, or the hundred after, I want to spend them with you when you're ready some day."

Po nuzzled some more into Thame's neck, the muskier leather part of Thame's smell becoming stronger in response to Po's state. There was no risk of Thame doing anything Po did not want, and Po knew this was immutable fact. But the time to make a choice was rapidly coming as heat and slick began to pool between Po's legs.

"Kiss me," Po said softly into Thame's neck.

Thame pulled away to look Po in the eyes and cup his cheeks before kissing him softly, reverently. His hands remained there but did not push or pull. Po's hands, forever greedy, moved to Thame's waist and sought the hem of his shirt, but Thame still did not move. There, Po could feel the beating of Thame's heart and the rapid pace of his breaths as Po's scent intensified. Thame did not pull away.

"Touch me," Po said into Thame's lips.

Thame's hands moved slowly down Po's neck, his shoulders, his arms, and finally rested on his thighs, squeezing gently, the same yet different from all the times they'd spent together before.

"P'Po, please." Thame moved to kiss Po's neck again and this time was met with no growl, but a moan instead. "Tell me what you want me to-"

Po pulled Thame down on top of him. "Stay with me."

Thame kissed Po again before pulling off his shirt and reaching into Po's pants and between his legs. Past sticky hardness into slick opening, Thame's fingers gently rubbed and prodded. Po felt his body arch without his permission.

"I'm so happy," Thame murmured as he pulled the blanket away with his clean hand while the other continued to work Po's body. Po arched his hips again and Thame took the opportunity to pull off Po's pants. "Thank you, thank you, thank you." Thame kissed each word down Po's still clothed chest, causing the other man to protest despite how both of Thame's hands were now busy coaxing and teasing both erection and hole.

The first orgasm surprised them both with the suddenness of it all. Po whimpered and moaned amid a fresh wave of cum and slick while Thame continued to work him through it.

"Towels," Thame mumbled to himself as he finally pulled off Po's t-shirt and his jeans after a kiss. "Towels later, yes." Thame rubbed the head of his dick against Po's opening. "Are you ready?"

Po pulled Thame down for another kiss, deeper, hungry in a way where he'd only just realized he'd been starving. "Please."

Thame obliged by thrusting in slowly and Po sighed in pleasure, glad Thame remembered his preferences even when not thinking about them. Although heat increased his desire and urgency, Po was still a more sensitive partner and moving too fast was something that caused more pain than pleasure early in sex. Something Earn had never bothered to think about.

"Is it good, P'Po?" Thame asked as he gently scraped his teeth against Po's neck. It was a secondary question, although Po wasn't sure if Thame knew he was asking it. "Do you want more?"

"It's good," Po said as he pulled Thame's face back into view to kiss him again. "It's really good. You can- ah!" Thame gave another hard thrust as a test and Po nearly squirmed from the overstimulation which meant it was almost enough. "Thame, I-"

"Do you want me to knot you, P'Po?" Thame asked as he maintained his slow pace, but harder thrusts. Po suddenly found it hard to breathe. "I know we've done it before but-"

"Yes," Po said in a breathy gasp. Thame pressed in as deep as he could go and Po could already feel the base of his dick swelling, catching on the edge of his hole. "But I'm..."

"Did he never knot you, phi?" Thame's brow furrowed and Po couldn't tell if it was annoyance at Earn or concentration from trying to melt his brain from pleasure while maintaining his perfect timing. "Don't think about him right now, think about me." Thame nuzzled Po's neck again as his knot finished swelling and he thrust in one last time.

Po groaned, feeling Thame's orgasm inside himself and feeling his own release all over his chest, coming untouched. The fullness was something health class had never properly described and something Earn had only granted him once. After deciding he hated Po's heat scent, Earn avoided knotting Po to avoid being stuck so close to the smell for longer than he needed to be.

"Can I bite you, phi?" Thame asked as he kissed everywhere he could reach. "Can I make you mine for good? My wonderful phi."

Po, unable to resist, melted under the attention, but did not present his neck and Thame didn't push. He settled for rubbing his cheeks against Po's neck, scenting instead of biting. Po sighed and allowed himself to enjoy the attention until they were untied.

"How long do your heats normally last?" Thame said after they separated and had a moment to clean up before the next wave came upon them.

"Not more than a day or two," Po said with a shrug. "At least that was before I took suppressants around Earn."

Thame paused for a moment. "Will... Will you go back to taking suppressants?"

Po looked to his bedside drawer. "Do you want to keep sharing heats with me?"

"Yes." Thame took Po's hands in his and kissed his knuckles. "Please let me."

Po's phone beeped and a glance told him it was the pharmacy.

Po pulled Thame down on top of him again.

"Then let's keep going."

"Yes, phi. Let's."

[suugarbabe]

made for loving you | r.l. x reader

an: It's my birthday! & I had this cute little bitty one shot idea that I wanted to do about reader x remus after I heard the song I Was Made for Loving You by Kiss so I had to write it immediately. This is my first time writing marauders era so please be gentle

Warnings: mentions of drinking

word count: ~1.3k

It had been a few years since you had seen everyone, at least all together like you were going to tonight. The years after Hogwarts were very generous to you, and you couldn’t say you were mad about it. You gave another twirl in front of Lily and Marlene, the two coming over to help you pick out your outfit. You had settled on a black plaid skirt paired with a black form fitting turtleneck. The November air in London never being forgiving. 

“You look stunning, truly, y/n/n,” Lily was hyping you up but you couldn’t help the nerves that were bubbling inside. 

“You don’t think it’s too much for a pub?” Doubt written on your face. 

Marlene rolled her eyes, “It’s Sirius’s birthday. You could never wear an outfit that was ‘too much’ when celebrating that man. He’s probably going to go all out himself.” 

You laughed with her and Lilly as you pulled on some black sheer tights and slipped on your boots, “Well you would know best, wouldn’t you Mar?” You gave her a wink. 

Marlene couldn’t contain her smile, “I would know best, thank you very much. You would know more if you came around more often! I feel like we haven’t properly seen you in forever.” 

You pouted slightly, “I know, I’m so sorry. I’ve just been…adjusting to life after Hogwarts. Who’s all gonna be there tonight anyway?” You did you best to sound as nonchalant as possible, forgetting that the two girls in front of you had been your best friends for seven straight years. 

Lily wore a cheeky grin as she answered, “Oh just the old gang, me, Mar, Sirius obviously, James, Frank, Alice and…Remus.” Lily put a little extra emphasis on the last name and your body reacts before you could control it, cheeks flushing a bright red. 

You hum in response, “Oh, cool, perfect. That’ll be exciting to see everyone.” Marlene and Lily exchanged a look, causing you to shift on your feet, “What?”

Marlene rolled her eyes, “Oh nothing, just you trying to act like you’re not still infatuated with Moony boy.” Lily was giggling next to her as you pouted, crossing your arms. 

“Oh come on, y/n/n,” Lily whined, grabbing your hands, “You two have been pining after each other since literally forever, and now you look like a bloody goddess and he’s going to be there, and you know he’ll be too shy to say anything Merlin forbid do anything.” 

You shook your head, opening the door to your flat as the others followed you down the street towards the pub, “I mean yes I had a crush on him but he did not have a crush on me.” 

Marlene and Lilly both groaned. “We’re gonna get a few drinks in you and then you’re going to make a move and see how right we are,” Marlene hooked her arm through your elbow. 

“Yes and I’ll make sure James gets a couple into Remus so maybe he won’t be quite as shy,” Lily smiled, hooking her arm on your other side. 

You made a mental note to have a conversation with both of your friends about what the phrase “few” meant because multiple shots and mixed drinks were far more than a few. The boys were late, which was no surprise, but you were not wanting to be completely drunk before they got here. But presently you didn’t have it in you to be too upset as one of your favorite songs came on and you were dragging your two friends to the small dance floor in the pub. 

You could feel the guitar and drums in your veins as your hips swayed to the beat, you were having a lot more fun than you anticipated for tonight. You danced and sang the lyrics out loud with Marlene and Lily before one of them grabbed your shoulders and forced you to turn around. 

Your eyes locked onto a head of soft brown hair like you were tied to him. As they got their drinks the three boys started walking towards your group. James and Sirius went straight into dancing as Remus, of course, walked smoothly over. 

Maybe it was the amount of alcohol you had, or maybe it was Marlene and Lily’s voice in the back of your head but you had a sudden surge of confidence, pointing your finger right at Remus as you sang the next chorus to the song. 

“I was made for lovin’ you, baby. You were made for lovin’ me” 

Remus wore a shy smile, pointing to himself and cocking his head slightly. You nodded your head, wrapping your free hand that wasn’t holding your drink around his neck and singing the next line.

“And I can’t get enough of you baby. Can you get enough of me?” 

Remus’s free hand found your hip, starting to sway with you for the remainder of the song. You assumed he had had some drinks at home with his friends before coming here. Partly because of the confidence he seemed to be having with you being so forward, and partly due to his seemingly relaxed state in his eyes. 

Over his shoulder you spotted James and Lily, the latter of which sent you a thumbs up before making a shooing motion with her hand. You raised an eyebrow at her and she tilted her head towards the back of the pub. You turned slightly, seeing the back hallway she was motioning to. 

“You okay?” Remus had leaned down to whisper in your ear. Goosebumps raised on your neck and you prayed he couldn’t tell. You looked up at him through your lashes, his honey eyes filled with adoration. 

You grabbed hold of his hand, lacing his fingers with yours and dragging him to the back of the pub. The hallway was only slightly quieter but it was dimmer and just the two of you. You pulled him with you to this space with such force that you nearly slammed your back into the wall with a grip on his jumper. 

Remus stables himself with a hand on the wall behind you. He’s towering over you, looking at you like no one’s ever looked at you before. You barely see his lips tilt into a smile, about to part and say something to you. However before he can get a word out you have another surge of confidence and pull him towards you, pressing your lips together. 

He takes no time to respond, your mouths melding together. His lips on yours was a feeling you never wanted to go without again, you had essentially ruined yourself from being able to kiss anyone else in the future. His free hand found your waist, digging his fingers into the soft flesh as he took a step closer to you, deepening the kiss and pressing his body against yours. 

Your fingers are laced in the hair at the base of his neck and when he pushed close to you, you can’t stop yourself from tugging lightly on the strands in your hand. Remus nearly whimpers into your mouth at the action and you swore your knees were going to give out right there. When he finally pulls away you’re both breathless. His forehead is rested against yours and your chests are heaving. 

“Wow,” Remus was the first one to break the silence you two were holding, “I am so incredibly stupid.” Your eyes shot up to meet his, fearful that he regrets what just happened. He can see the apprehension in your face and only smiles at you, cupping your cheek and running his thumb along your lips, “I am so incredibly stupid to have been too shy to do anything like that sooner.” 

You let out a breath you weren’t even aware you were holding before pulling Remus face back to yours, connecting your lips once more.  So enthralled with each other you didn’t notice your group of friends coming down the hall until Sirius opened his big mouth, “Uhm, hello? It’s my birthday, why the hell is no one snogging me like that?” Yours and Remus' response was a simple middle finger thrown his way, not even pulling your faces apart in the process.

[ldydeath]

I Need Somebody 2 | Kwon Ji-yong (G-Dragon)

Summary: Everything has changed now that you’ve appeared in Jiyong’s song. Do you have what it takes to make it out of the industry? Word count: 1.8k Warnings: slight angst (?), mentions of body weight and body image issues. Author’s Note: decided to then one of my April fics into a series. You can check out the master list here! 

You hadn’t known when you’d slipped into Jiyong’s car that night how much your life was going to change. You’d thought you’d just be a simple cameo on a song, maybe dip your toes into a new relationship. You never imagined you’d be standing around a group of people who were picking apart every last thing about you. 

Like everything Jiyong touched, the song had been a hit. You’d gotten more traction that you’d expected. Though, you figured that had to do with your last minute addition to the song being so heavily highlighted in Good Day more so than your actual vocals. Either way, you’d somehow managed to get signed to Jiyong’s label. 

He was helping produce your solo single, something you’d been very vocal about. You had never wanted fame, singing karaoke as a release had been enough for you. So if you were going to do this you were going to do it with someone you trusted. 

The two of you had been inseparable since the night you met. If you weren’t at his place he was at yours. You’d stood by his side for his first solo concert, gone with him to support Daesung's solo journey as well. You’d found a home with Jiyong in the few short months you’d known him.  That home was something you desperately wanted to get to right now. You didn’t know if you could handle one more person critiquing your body today.

Your phone buzzed, cutting through the noise and you let out a sigh as you excused yourself to see who it was. You weren’t at all surprised to see Jiyong’s name flash across the screen. You were supposed to have been done with this outfit fitting hours ago. He had a show at a golf event that you were supposed to be at. He’d be taking the stage any minute. 

Did you forget about me?

You snorted at the text, as if you could forget him even if you tried. 

Not even a little bit. Fitting went over. Should be out of here soon.

I’ll make sure to send you a video. I’m wearing the suit you picked out. Miss you.

Don’t change, I’ll be over after. 

You smiled at your phone, before you heard it. The soft murmurs of the team. Someone was asking what Jiyong possibly saw in you, another commenting on your body weight….again. You tried to silence the noise, because that’s all it was. You were a pretty girl, someone Jiyong had been attracted to and it didn’t matter what they thought. At least that’s what you told yourself. 

The fitting went on for a few more hours and you finally made your way to your house, defeated. You were supposed to be celebrating at Jiyong’s. A successful show for him, a successful fitting for you. Future power couple in the making and all that. But after this day, you just needed to curl up in a ball and shut the rest of the world out. 

You’d sent Jiyong a text telling him you weren’t feeling up to going to his place and headed straight home. You’d been too far in your own head, you'd missed Jiyong’s car parked out front. Didn’t even realize the door was unlocked when you stuck your key in. You slid out of your shoes and dropped your bag down, a sniffle following suit as you leaned against the door. Your eyes cloudy with tears.

“What happened?” Jiyong’s voice had an edge to it you hadn’t heard before and you turned to face him. 

“I didn’t know you were here, I’m sorry.” You wiped the tears away quickly as more seeped out. You hadn’t meant to let them get to you like this. 

Jiyong had known something was up when you didn’t make it to the show. His suspicions had been right when you’d canceled on him all together. If anyone knew how cruel the industry could be, it was him. He’d watched it destroy his best friend, almost destroyed him too. He wasn’t going to let that happen to you. 

He moved quickly, his hands finding their way to your face as his thumb wiped away the tears spilling down your cheeks. It broke his heart seeing you this way and he pulled you to him. Your face buried into his chest as you took a minute to collect yourself. He rested his chin on your head, holding you close as his hands ran soothing circles on your back. He didn’t know what they’d done to you, but he’d make sure they wouldn’t do it again. 

“What did they do?” His voice was more calm, but there was still an edge to it. 

“ApparentlyI’m hideous and extremely wrong for you.” You sighed, moving out from the safety of his arms. 

“That’s completely inaccurate.” He crossed the room, keeping in pace with you. “You’re gorgeous for starters. And you could do a lot better than me.” You snorted. 

You moved to sit on the couch, pulling a blanket up over you and wrapped your arms around your legs, attempting to make yourself as small as possible. You took a second to take in Jiyong, his messy hair, the suit, under different circumstances you’d be ripping those clothes off him. You wanted the confidence you’d had that morning back. 

“You look nice, by the way.” Jiyong smirked at your words before moving to sit next to you. 

He pulled you into his arms and you practically melted into his touch. This was what you’d wanted all day - to be with him. You just hated that you felt so broken in his arms. As if reading your thoughts, Jiyong placed a kiss to the top of your head, your cheek, and then finally your lips. 

There it was, that magnetic pull you’d felt in the club again. It was always there, pulling you to him. The struggles of the day disappearing for a minute while you’re tongues danced for dominance. If you could spend the rest of time kissing this man you’d be happy forever. Unfortunately, you couldn’t. 

“I ordered us food. Figured you hadn’t eaten today.” His forehead resting against yours as he spoke. 

“I haven’t. I should eat salads until I fit into this ridiculous outfit.” You pulled away, as if repulsed with yourself. 

“Hey. No. You’re perfect. Everyone in that club the night we met thought so, I still think so. We’ll get you a new stylist if this continues. They need to alter the clothes to fit you, not the other way around.” He pulled you back to him. “You’re going to eat and we’re going to forget this day ever happened.” 

Your head found its way to his shoulder, and you curled into him. His arm stayed planted around you, as if he was solely responsible for keeping you upright. You don’t know how long you sat there in the silence but it was nice to have him to come back to after a day like this. 

The two of you are in silence, Jiyong watching to make sure you actually ate. He knew how easy it was to get lost in the noise of the negative comments, but he would reassure you every day that they were wrong if they had to. 

“Come on, up.” Jiyong was on his feet his hand reaching out for you. 

“What, why?”

“Just trust me.” You sighed, taking his hand.

He pulled you to your feet before taking out his phone and flipping through his Spotify before landing on the perfect song. Hitting play, his hand rested on your hip, his other gripping your hand. You let out a small laugh as you swayed to the music. 

“This is cheesy.” You teased, your eyes glancing up to look at him. 

“It’s romantic.” He corrected, a lopsided grin crossing his face as his eyes locked with yours. 

You let him twirl you around your living room, his voice humming along to the lyrics of the song. It wasn’t one you recognized but he had a way of making everything so beautiful. This song was sure to be your new favorite. 

You could feel yourself relaxing, the weight of the day finally fading away as you melted into Jiyong. A real smile on your face as you leaned up to kiss him. He held you close, his lips moving with yours as he tried his best to kiss all your pain away. 

“You should be my Too Bad dancer on tour.” He said it so casually, like he had the power to just change everything that easily. 

“What? Why?” You shook your head. “I couldn’t.”

“You should see yourself when you get lost in the music like that. You’re breathtaking.” He moved your head so that you were looking at him. “And you can. Unless you’re scared.” 

“I’m not.” You glared at him, knowing exactly what he was doing. He’d figured you out so quickly in the short time you’d been together. “Are you sure?”

“About you? Always.” He smirked and you grinned. 

“Alright. I’ll do it.” 

Jiyong’s gummy grin matched the one on your face and he leaned down to kiss you again. This was the only way he could think to keep you safe. You’d be on the road with him, you could work together on songs while you traveled around Asia. He could fire your stylist and you could use his. You’d be surrounded by support and if it ever got too heavy he’d be right there fo carry the weight of the world for you. Or with you. Whatever you wanted. 

He’d known it the second he’d laid eyes on you that he’d do anything for you. Now he just needed to show you how serious he was about it. This journey wasn’t going to be easy, but it would lead you to some beautiful places and a chance at a different life than the one you’d grown accustomed to. You were a star in his eyes and soon enough the rest of the world would see that too. 

“Come on, let’s go to bed. It’s been a long day.” His hand slid down your body effortlessly as he reached for yours.

Lacing your fingers together, he led you to your room. It amazed you how comfortable he was walking through your house like he owned the place. You hadn’t been together that long but you couldn’t imagine a time before him now. 

He helped you undress, leaving tinder kisses across your skin as he slid your robe on your body. You helped him out of his suit jacket, undid his tie carefully before flinging it across the room. You’d imagined this going so differently when you’d seen this suit earlier. He stripped down to his boxers before climbing into bed and pulling you to him. 

He covered you both up, his arms wrapping around you as you drifted off to sleep. He watched you for a while before reaching for his phone. He fired off a few text messages to make sure you wouldn’t have to worry about ever seeing that team of people ever again. When you woke up in the morning you’d have a whole new team, he’d make sure of that. 

tag list: @wcnderlnds @infinetlyforgotten @berfgrimm @aizshallnotbefound @loveesiren @gdinthehouseee @tulentiy @petersasteria @alosss-blog @sooyasya @dprvivi @mirahyun @breakmeoff @1950schick @flymetothexmoon @sherrayyyyy

[yuri-is-online]

Congratulations on your 500 foll and I hope you well.

I would like to request for a friend too, the character would be Azul and Silver. No. 9. Would like to see on their perspective, how they felt that the prefect wasn't invited by the time they came. And unknowingly they talk to prefect, is not like the prefect can say it's them they talking to.

9.You weren't technically invited to this event but it's a Masquerade! It's not like anyone will notice or care if you sneak in, so you do just that and find a really depressed friend of yours lamenting they won't get to dance with their crush.

Thank you my dear, as your friend has requested I have written this strictly from Silver and Azul's point of view. If you are curious about the prefect's point of view, I received a second request for Azul that can be found here. If you or your friend would like another character since Azul was technically already requested you are more than welcome to message me and make another request, there is no time limit on that.

notes: they/them used for Yuu, same music for Azul used in the first part and I have linked them again in case this is the first part you read. Silver is a dense boy. The other event requests can be found on my masterlist.

Azul

What a waste of a night. Even if Crewel hadn't woven some extra magic into these costumes everyone is wearing some extra sort of wig or hat in addition to their mask that means he cannot tell who most of these people are. He can pick out Leona and both of the twins, but Leona can also pick him out and has no problem telling him so. The twins are another matter entirely, but he is content to let them be someone else's headache tonight. Azul seldom wants to be alone, usually he has his work for company, but tonight he has to be here and actually listen to his thoughts.

And his thoughts have drawn him out here to the balcony in an attempt to convince himself he is not upset at the way the Masquerade is turning out.

"Play me a song you're the piano shriiiimpy~" An exasperated sigh draws Azul out from his kitchen, mug clasped in both hands to avoid tempting fate and dropping it if he gets too caught up in the moment. Floyd has apparently taken to misquoting song lyrics to annoy Yuu into ditching their cleaning duties to play the Lounge piano. Again. And again he cannot say he minds no matter what he is going to say to Floyd later. The music begins to soothe his exhaustion, smile flickering into something more genuine and gentle as they fuss about trying to play a song that "fits the atmosphere" that he recognizes as the piano part of a larger jazz piece. He considers moving to close the gap, and any other time seeing someone struggle with something he had so firm a grasp of would be cause enough...

But then Yuu starts to sing, sing about love and guilt in a manner that almost feels targeted directly at his sense of self with how well it suits his establishment. It's perfect, they're perfect and he wants nothing more than to enter and give himself away completely-

And then his mug shatters in his hands from the strength of his longing (certainly not from his grip, that would be undignified) keeping him from playing things by ear, at least for tonight.

There is someone watching him play, he can sense the confusion in their gaze as he turns his thoughts towards a more grounded song. Not that he can bring himself to make it less longing. The stranger claps politely, clearly not having intended to stay so long but to leave now would be awkward. And Azul excels at punishing the awkward.

"I am sorry for interrupting you." Tries the stranger and Azul laughs to himself slightly. Oh he bets they are.

"Oh it's no trouble really." Azul stands in an attempt to appear unbothered, sticking the landing in a way that does fill him with a degree of pride. He would have struggled with using his legs like this just a year ago and now he practically appears human. "I was just helping myself, really what were the hosts thinking leaving such a lovely piano out here all alone? It's practically begging to be played."

"Of course." The person shifts, not wanting to be impolite but also not wanting to stay and talk much longer. That suits him just fine, go and leave him to his longing, he has a white whale to pine after. "You chose such a unique song for it too, I couldn't help but be distracted." He fails to hide his emotion for just a moment, hand involuntarily dropping back to the keys tempted to begin his playing anew. How happy it would make him if Yuu was the one to say that.

"It is isn't it." It would make all of it worth it. "A... friend of mine taught it to me." It's a lie, but that's most of what he does, a thought that draws him away from the conversation and into his own mind. This person will forget this conversation and be unable to recall the tune, so what harm is there in telling the truth? "I have been practicing it for them. For tonight." Because he had. He had been planning to get Yuu alone, the Masquerade had been a convenient setting to set the mood. He would find them and keep their attention for the night, dance with them, talk with them from under his mask but keep things light so there was some plausible deniability when midnight struck and the masks were removed.

"I should let you get back to them then." The stranger bows gently, content that their obligations have been fulfilled and to leave him to his... he is not sulking but there is a chance this uneducated person might misinterpret his tone as something similar to that.

"They're not here sadly. No thanks to me, if only they had thought to ask for my help..." He knows why they didn't, but it still stings. But does he have anyone to blame for this but himself? He might see the prefect as a student just like any other, but Crowley doesn't. Maybe he could have gotten away with asking Yuu on a date, make things awkward enough for the Headmage that he had to allow it, but then he would have had to ask Crewel for permission and he never would have gotten that. The music returns to his fingers, even as the stranger walks away. He should keep up the pretext, play the Mermaid Princess's song so no one can use this against him or target the prefect. But he has to know why-

"It's got to be an important song to them if they remembered how to play it... right?" He mutters it to himself, but he wants so desperately to know. If he had succeeded, if Yuu had been invited and they had gotten to dance until the end of the ball...

If he had taken them back to the lounge and played it for them, complete with the words, would it have made the impact he wanted? Or was he making assumptions again. He doesn't know, and the stranger dissipates into the night without his answers, not that he knows they would have had them to begin with.

Silver

"My my, aren't you all a handsome crew." His father is laughing, darting around with his phone snapping pictures with such joy that it should be enough to make Silver happy. Sebek is practically bursting with pride, and his lord certainly seems content if not happy, but Silver...

He tries hitting his cheeks to make himself smile, but the only thing it accomplishes is worrying his father, who floats down to his side to check him over before smiling ruefully up at him.

"I bet you don't know why you're upset, do you?" Lilia clearly seems to think he knows why, something that deepens the creases in his forehead behind the mask.

"I'm sorry, Father." The last thing he wants to do is ruin Malleus's excitement with his poor mood, though it feels more like he's starting to get sick than upset. "I'm just... tired is all."

"Hardly unusual." Sebek huffs. "Really Silver you need to get it together this is an important night for-"

"You don't need to worry, Silver." Malleus brings everyone's attention to him with a simple shake of his head, and Silver finds his heart warming just slightly at his lord's comfort. "I'm also displeased with our friend's absence." The mention of the prefect brings back the strange sick feeling, though he finds himself standing up just a bit straighter as their group finally makes it into the ballroom.

"Yes it is such a pity." His father is laughing, but not cruelly. It sounds more like he's plotting something. "Perhaps I'll bake them a cake to cheer them up." The strange sickness starts squeezing his natural worry into something so painful he almost doubles over.

"If you are still awake by the end of the party, you can accompany me to visit them at Ramshackle. I'm certain they would be pleased to see you." Malleus's lips have stretched into that smug smile that suggests he is privy to something Silver is not, but the thought of seeing the Prefect lightens his steps and relaxes the knot in his stomach to something more manageable.

Perhaps it relaxed him too much, the last thing he really remembers is going to get something to drink close to the beginning of the Masquerade and now someone is shaking him awake. Their costumes hides their emotions, but his squirrel friends seem almost smug as they jump off their shoulder to rub their noses against him.

"Are you alright?" Asks the stranger. "I thought you were just enjoying the music but your friends seemed really worried." The squirrels stare up at him waiting for... praise? Or maybe a reward, Silver quietly apologizes to them explaining that the people food isn't the best for them only to get indignantly screeched at

Don't be an idiot! Go for it Silver!

Go for what? He doesn't know but he picks them up all the same and bows in apology to the stranger.

"I'm sorry they bothered you, but thank you for waking me up." The squirrels bounce off away from him with a groan and he frowns in confusion before turning back to his new friend. "It's a good thing you woke me up, I need to find Lord Malleus and make sure he's alright." The stranger, strangely, doesn't stiffen in fright at the mention of his lord but Silver barely notices. "I don't suppose you know if the school ghosts would let me take a to go box? Fa- Lilia wants to bring a friend of ours something as an apology but I would like it to actually be edible." The stranger coughs and Silver wonders if maybe there's a bug going around the school that he's passed onto this stranger briefly before they respond.

"I'm sure they won't mind too much." Their voice is strained, maybe they have a sore throat. He moves to pour them a drink.

"That's a relief," he passes over the drink and makes sure the other student at least takes a sip "I wonder if Crewel will let me keep my mask a bit longer..."

"Aren't they yours to keep? I though that's what the cr- I mean the Headmage said." They sound somewhat bitter.

"I was asleep during the announcement so I don't know. That's why I didn't realize Y- my friend wasn't going to be here until today." The other student sips their drink quietly, hopefully it soothes their throat as Silver stares down at his own.

"I bet you don't know why you're upset, do you?"

He leans back trying to avoid falling asleep again as the other student stands listlessly, concerned about his well being probably.

"I am upset." He says, more to himself than the stranger. "I wanted to spend some time with them tonight but..." that should be normal. It's normal to want to spend time with your friends. But Silver doesn't really recognize this want, nor does he have time before the booming voice of Sebek hustles it's way towards his location and scares off his new friend. Pity, he would have liked to try introducing them to Malleus. Something in the back of hid mind says they already would get along well.

[itsafablefolks]

Some things about Nothing Changes

This whole animatic is supposed to be a reflection of Icarus’ mindset right before the finale. They thought that, well, nothing could change. They thought that they needed to do this because they had no other options, and because it was what they had always done.

However, that wasn’t true. This comes up when a lot of the frames don’t entirely match what the song is saying- like “whats done is done” being on Icarus trying to kill Jamie, which they find out in the finale didn’t work. Another frame that I really like for this is the final nothing changes with the wack. The wack is the reason things could change- people could remember past resets because of the buildings wacked in, but for Icarus, the changing blocks was something constant.

I also did fun color things! Mostly everything is shades of grey. Generally, there being color signifies something different about what’s going on- there’s wack, or it’s showing the people who are trying to get Icarus out of this mindset, or Icarus has finally figured out things can change. Most of the time, the only color is Icarus’ eyes and eyeblood. I wanted something on Ic to be colored while the rest was black and white, mainly to help them stand out, and their eyes and eyblood are the easiest to do that with.

More about specific frames under the cut!

The beginning is (loosely) the morning of the finale, when Ic was just very sad.

The groups of three each have a theme, and they show scenes fitting that theme from season 1, 2, and 3.

It ain’t no use: These are times when Rae and Icarus fought. So from S1 it’s the temple of creation, from S2 right before Icarus ran away, and from S3 it’s Brother’s Final Stand, when Rae (finally) snaps. This was honestly the hardest theme to pick, but I like it for broters because, as stated, Icarus does think there’s no use in trying to repair that relationship.

You’re bound to lose: Icarus is failing. This was the easiest theme to pick, but the hardest to choose frames for, mostly because there were too many options. For S1, I ended up doing when Sherb gets launched into the sky by Luce. There were many other times Sherb failed in S1, but this is one of them that is the most obvious to me because it was going kinda well until god showed up. For S2, it’s failing to kill Centross in the prison. For S3, it’s when they tried to kill Vikesh. They were so confident going into that, and then it went so, so wrong.

What’s done is done: These are things that Ic thinks they can’t come back from. From S1, it’s killing Haley, from S2, putting Centross in the prison, from S3, (attempting to) kill Jamie. This really plays into the dichotomy of this animatic, because all of these got “fixed” somewhat. Haley got glitched back in, Centross forgives them, and Jamie didn’t actually die.

The next section is answering the question the song is asking. Why should Icarus try to change anything? Their family and friends. They’re in color because I wanted them to contrast the rest of the animatic, and because they try to break Icarus out of their spiral.

The first two nothing changes draw parallels from s1 and s3, the first one being the potions, the second being Ominous Bane vs the Coworkers.

The third Nothing Changes is the Wack. This is the reason this animatic got made. There’s a couple points to this:

The juxtaposition of “Nothing Changes” while things are physically changing behind them

The fact that for Icarus, the wack is a constant thing (It’ll stop any day now)

And that buildings wacking in from past resets is why something was able to change- people were able to remember past resets and eventually, stop that cycle.

The last frame goes to full color because here, Icarus realizes that they can, and should, change things, and that it is possible for things to change. It’s not half color because this time it’s them figuring it out, and it actually works.

Some fun facts-

I got the idea for this right before the finale, then about a week ago started the whole thing over. Originally, I was doing this in full color and that was not working.

I was working on the frame of Icarus putting Centross in the prison during the Great Lego Race. Which was. Interesting.

I learned how to save color palettes after I finished this animatic, so for all the frames, I had my original coloring of Ic up so the colors would stay mostly the same. I called it the “ghost of Icarus future”

Thanks for reading all of this! If you like, check out the rest of my Fable animatics!

[stair-tilez]

Hi guys, good luck with drawing today!

For any of your blorbos, 2, 3, 5, 28

Mariusrenathyrs-crashout

hello!!! thank you :D!! i did three blorbos just for fun and because im a tryhard </3

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

shepherd; AUGH !!!!!!!! YOU CANT MAKE ME CHOSE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant pick anything serious because there's too many good choices so i'm gonna say its the fact his lesser restoration is just him making coffee..... i think its cute <3 i think. well, i know from a certain point of view, that he would Not like how much creamer i put in my coffee kana; she is so painfully human, she cares and of course shes strong and dependable and determined but she also freaks out and makes mistakes and isn't perfect. the entire party has such fascinating relationships with the idea and actual act of being human that it makes kana being this highly moral warrior human that much more fantastic . if that makes sense i might be rambling madly skrimm; oh this damn goblin of multitudes... i think my favorite thing has to be his relationship with graveyard jack ESPECIALLY with the latest episodes. just seeing how he tests the waters of how connected they are was such a good touch and just the moment i realized he was working up an appetite in case he needed to be hungry for graveyard jack to eat?? augh its so fucking good

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

shepherd; sliiiight cop out answer but everyday i think of when well, spoilers, but he let himself be talked into something he knew he shouldn't do and was dead set on Not doing and like I Know why Andy did it (he talked about it in a&c) but god. grabbing shepherd violently. why the fuck would you do that you dumbass!!!!!!! kana; this doesn't quite fit the question but i need to say it. i hate how much her master and her backstory got meme'd on at the end. i know they were carrying around that old man during some really inconvenient times and he was soooo sickly and everything was too serious so the jokes were nice but it felt so dismissive of her story and it genuinely really bothered me. and i know she gets to have her moment with her master eventually but even it was really blegh and . blows up. basically i wish they had capped off her personal arc better but i still love her dearly skrimm; this is gonna be blasphemous from me, guy who loves to pair skrimm off with just about anyone, but i don't really like skrimm/daisy, not cause its bad or anything i just feel so painfully indifferent about it. i see it happening before my eyes and i should think its cute but i find that this is the one subplot i really don't care about.. i love and support all skraisy shippers though you guys are awesome

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

shepherd; so kind of poor mans poison to write music about shepherd before he was around <3 (silly)

kana; i have naught even a sliver of defense for this one. i just think about her a lot and it makes me sad

skrimm; this is a little silly but i stand by it

28. If you could have this character meet another in another media, who would you have them meet?

im not very crossover-pilled tbh but ill try to think of something o7 shepherd; tangotek from hermitcraft (s10) i kept trying to think of something other than hermits but like. i genuinely think shepherd and tango would be good friends. tango would casually ask if shepherd wants some upgrades to judgement and redemption and the moment shepherd was like "good doctor cogburn made these for me, i dont think they need any tinkerin" tango would immediately be like "oh fuck i did Not approach that right" cause he meant it like a helpful gesture but it would not read that way. hed spend a few days making some fancy ass lighter as an apology like "hey man i didnt mean to imply ur guns were bad or anything, tinkificating is just what i do." then hand it to him with little fanfare. shepherd doesnt need a lighter, but he would appreciate the thought and the apology kana; coral glasses from ena dream bbq i dont have any like super deep thoughts about this, i just think they should relax together and just talk about the nonsense they both deal with. kana would be fucking blown away by the happening of the world of ena but part of her is sitting there like "woah... almost makes me glad i dealt with strahdanya instead of . any of that." meanwhile coral glasses hears kana's story and starts sweating like "how the hell did you deal with any of that... not even getting paid for it either.." skrimm; booker t raccoon from uprooted i couldnt think of anything so cop out answer it is, i need to study these two like bugs because they would be so territorial of their friends from each other even tho both of them are Not interested in the others friends. theyre silly like that

[sudusong]

My Kerubim Playlist - explained

Very self indulgent post going into details on why I picked certain songs for my playlist. Will explain the other playlists later because this post took ages to write.

CHILDHOOD PART:

1. Kikuo - the Good Child and the Fox Spirit

I chose this song because Ecaflip is a bad father. Yay <3

It's also a parallel to the song "You Are A Worthless Child" by Kikuo, which is on Atcham's playlist.

2. Regina Spektor - Two Birds

I chose this song because,,, I like to think that Atcham and Kerubim had very different visions if their lives and futures, when they were kids. And Ecaflip's manipulation didn't really help.

3. Maretu - The Flavor of a Cockroach

I chose this song because it's very unique in being a song about bullying from the perspective of a bystander/bully. I don't think Atcham was having a good time in the orphanage, and him not having a good time was also making Kerubim feel unwell.

4. Eve - Sister

The thing about my playlists is that I like to use them as a medium to retell the story of a character. I think it goes well with Maretu's song because it expresses Kerubim leaving Atcham behind.

5. SEDO - Bad Mouthing

While I don't think Kerubim was bullied in the orphanage, I do think he was excluded and tried to cope with it by clownery and denying it was happening. And by trying to leave Atcham.

6. Abuseken - Um, Ren-kun?

This is a special type of song I add to playlists - a "vibe-builder". This song might not fit a character but it expresses story ideas of Kerubim and Atcham being badddd to each other, because the entire song is two people going "I'm going to kms because you don't love me" "Good I think you should in fact kys" at one another, which is entirely how I think they talked to each other at the tail end of still being on talking terms when they were kids.

7. Pinocchio-P - Isn't it "A"

The last song is very "Kerubim and Atcham" /neg, while this one portrays a conflict between two people in a less mentally ill way, exploring that neither is right and that both are looking at the world with different opinions that may or may not be the same opinion viewed in a different light. I thought it might be important to use this song to reiterate my belief that in this situation there is no right or wrong side.

8. Maretu - Maegamist

I always interpreted this to be a song from the POV of someone who closed their eyes from mistreatment someone close to them suffered, either by someone else or by their own hand - before realizing far too late how bad things have gotten. I do think Kerubim coped his way into Atcham detesting him.

9. Glass Animals - Space Ghost Coast to Coast

This song is inspired by the singer's real experience of finding out that his childhood friend tried to commit mass murder, and I think that when Atcham went off the deep end Kerubim uhhh. struggled. As we've seen in canon, while he feels bad about their relationship, he also unflinchingly thinks Atcham is a very mentally ill individual and has nobody to blame but himself for 90% of the predicaments he's in (at least, ever since leaving the orphanage). So this song's unflinching "I understand life hurts, and I want you to get better, but you are insane" energy is very fitting.

ADOLESCENCE / ADULTHOOD PART

10. Glass Animals - Take a Slice

This song is another of those "vibe-builder" ones. This song is very lustful, the most sexual one Glass Animals ever did. It follows the story of a female sex worker who is falling in love with one of her clients. I think it's a good opener for the part of the playlist that touches on Kerubim's youth, because the lyrics are vague, and Kerubim has an inherent femininity to his self-confidence and his crush on Lou, which is very well expressed through this song. He's a bit of a femme fatale to me, and this song is very "Kerubim Crepin at his most confident, to the point of arrogance. He is cute and sexy and dangerous, and he knows it".

It's also a very high point, which serves well, considering his life gets worse afterwards and the songs do reflect that.

11. K.Flay - High Enough

This being the first song after the one that serves as the "character intro" of adult Kerubim immediately sets the stage to his relationship with Lou being completely fucked and unhealthy, with him using this relationship to numb the pain of everything that happened to him.

12. K.Flay - Thicker than Dust

His "femme fatale" that was expressed in the last song is, in a way, just him abusing various substances and falling in love with people to distract himself from the whole "my parents died and I went to orphanage and my brother hates me and is a criminal now" thing. Less real confidence and more of him confusing numbness and need to distract himself for confidence and happiness.

13. K.Flay - Wishing It Was You

While he is using his on-and-off relationship with Lou as a painkiller, he does love and pine for her - but the whole song being "I'm drinking and imagining myself giving you head instead of drinking" is kinda very Kerubim-core. At this age he wasn't very deep and WAS addicted to multiple substances imo, including alcohol, frat boy style.

14. K.Flay - Fever

This is also a Lou pining song, but in a far more desperate way because Kerubim is a very lonely person and his way of living his life actively makes him miserable.

15. K.Flay - FML (FUCK MY LIFE)

Guys I don't think alcoholism and substances and being a cute sexy adventurer and dating are fixing him.

16. K.Flay - Bad Things

This is a very sad, hopeless, and introspective song about trying to drown one's troubles in addictions. With this one, I am slowly upping the sadness ante. And also, it is the first Very Self Aware Kerubim Song, even if it is hopeless (basically saying "I will never get better and I will be alone forever.")

17. K.Flay - Make Me Fade

A spiritual sequel to me including "High Enough" by K.Flay in this playlist. Instead of speaking of the relationship as a painkiller, this song goes fully in the "you make feel like I have disappeared, and it's a good thing", and feeling like Lou not being there is torture.

It also touches more on the budding understanding that life is baddd. Like with the lyric "Sad about the bad I've done, on my grave, please believe me."

18. K.Flay - Can't Sleep

The last K.Flay song in this huge chunk of the playlist that's nothing but K.Flay music.

The most explicit song in the whole "my life is bad" arc. References other people being displeased with the way of life that is being led, which fits with Lou probably not liking Kerubim's self-destructive behaviours but not really being able to help him and blaming him for said behaviours.

19. Glass Animals - Waterfalls Coming Out Your Mouth

This is so ironic about someone who seems shallow and very confident, hiding behind a veneer of being cool and sexy. The song itself seems funky and filled with vibes, but hides something deeper and more violent/ill.

This song seems like a conversation he would have with himself, extremely self-hatingly.

20. Abuseken - Menthol Tear

Another "vibe-building" song. It doesn't fit him well outside the context of this playlist, but here it is included to express his rising feelings of jealousy, "she is going to leave me fr fr", and feelings of inadequacy.

21. SODDIKEN - Hansel

This song might not fit him entirely, but it is a mirror of the song "Gretel" by SODDIKEN which is on Atcham's playlist, and does express a sense of a slipping mental health + Kerubim's abandonment issues and need to be the center of attention and love.

22. skyfish66 - Go Big or Go Home!

ALL GAMBLERS QUIT JUST BEFORE THEIR BIGGEST WIN! But to be serious, this is extremely Kerubim-core to the point of being self-explanatory.

It fits with the previous song's theme of "upping the ante to be liked" and turning your life into a show. And it is kinda... Ecaflip City-ish.

23. Kikuo - Love me. Love me. Love me.

OK so what if your father was a god and he wanted to manipulate you into spending centuries living with him and to do that he constantly berated you and said you were worthless but also sad you're literally the most wonderful and cool and amazing child ever. And what if your relationships all fell apart because you keep using people to fill the void within you that you have felt ever since your family died and your brother left you. Wouldn't it be fucked up or what.

24. TX2 - I Would Hate Me Too

"I'm a 5'4'' manwhore who slit his wrists. there's a reason I keep wrecking relationships. And I would fucking hate me too" - worlds realest kerubimcore lyrics.

25. Akali - Surrender

This is an another "vibe" song, and a very dark and cryptic one. I always interpreted it to be about a conversation that takes place during a break up caused by severe mental illnesses that have eroded a relationship in ways that are both unfixable and haunting, and uhhh. You can guess why it is in the kerulou part of this Kerubim playlist.

26. Nantoka-P - Love Love Nightmare

Its just a horror song, but lyrics "which one of us is the bad one?" and "I wished I would be the only one who exists for you" are Very kerulou, especially as reflections on a relationship that has ended.

27. DECO*27 - Ghost Rule (Cover by Crusher)

If I don't add this song to the playlists of characters whose central trait is being a liar/faker, the Blorbo Police will execute me.

28. GHOST - ROTARY DIAL

An angry sort of "everyone always abandons me and I hope every one of them dies for having boundaries and cutting me out of their lives for my negative influence" song. He deserves a moment of being toxic and a hater.

29. Red Vox - In The Garden

A song about the guilt that follows habitually ruining relationships, trying and failing to change, and escape responsibility for your actions.

30. K.Flay - Punisher

Themes of divinity of one's self in their life, which flows into the theme of being one's own worst enemy and obstacle.

31. K.Flay - Yes, I'm Serious

This always makes me cry, whether I'm listening to it normally (I am a big fan of K.Flay and the circumstances behind it's making are just. heartbreaking) and in the context of Kerubim.

In a way, in the context of this playlist, it's the finale of the "Kerubim being very mentally ill" arc of this playlist that's been happening since song #20.

It's very introspective and has many self-realizations, in a way.

"Really, I feel like I'm feeling the feelings of my inner child whose been pounding the ceiling; Repeatedly asking for reasons and soothing, so I found a bottle and covered the bruising; But I was confusing a numbness for comfort, abandoned myself while I slipped under cover." — ngl these lyrics make me fucking insane both in blorbo context and normal person context.

32. Shikiura Sougo - Poison me, I want to drown in you.

It's a very beautiful and dare I say cute song reflecting on a horrible relationship that is described as being "a painkiller" and "poison", ending with words that go something like "I want to face you properly and say I really do love you."

I think it's a very cute and melancholic sort of post-break up kerulou song. In the context of Kerubim, even knowing how bad things were, he still loves her and wishes neither of them did this harm, even if it is far too late.

33. Glass Animals - Heat Waves

This song is literally about a relationship that failed and it has lyrics like "I wish I could make you happy". Big divorcecore track. I am going to throw myself into a river.

34. K.Flay - Slow March

This song is about life moving on regardless, as you try to heal and make sense of everything that happened. I think he'd be in limbo, after the divorce, for a pretty long while. There's a reason none of his stores in the show take place after it...

35. Rainbow Kitten Surprise - It's Called: Freefall

This song is about battling suicidal ideation after things went just completely Over. Besides that, it also is a conversation between a godly figure representing the bad urges and vices and the desire to die (but also, depending on the interpretation of the song that you prefer, might be trying to help instead, despite his evil nature), and a man who is at the end of his rope and is talking to him out of loneliness.

Kinda Ecaflip-core ngl.

36. Arcade Fire - The Suburbs

It's a song about growing old. It's a song about moving on from even the things you thought were completely world-shattering. It's a song about regretting your youth.

It's a song about hoping to have a child just to show them how beautiful the world is before the damage is done.

37. DECO*27 & Pinocchio-P - (Not) a Devil

The version in my playlist is a cover, because I think the subs there are beautiful than the subs on the official upload of the song.

I think "angel who is being choked by purity and trying to appear better" and "demon who is trying to appear angelic" is a very good aesthetic for Kerubim and Atcham. Two opposites that are more similar than one might think.

I think this kinda fits because after the divorce and growing old, Kerubim and Atcham start actively beefing again due to going to a war AND due to Atcham trying to kill him in Astrub.

38. Nashimoto - Die In a Place Where I Can't See You

LITERALLY all of Kerubim's feelings on Atcham as an old man. He still loves him. (Sadly.)

39. Shikemoku - Hocus Pocus

YOU WILL NEVER GUESS WHY THIS SONG IS ON THE PLAYLIST.

40. K.Flay - Mean It

A song about wanting to get better to love someone more sincerely and without selfishness.

"I hope to die next to my daughter, let her sing me to sleep. Having made the mistakes of a mother, still I taught her to breathe [...] So when the world gets painful, she becomes her own god."

41. K.Flay - Get it Right

A song about wanting to become better, despite your impulses, wanting to break the cycle and carve out a good life for yourself despite how much it hurts.

42. K.Flay - Giver

Song about trying to unlearn selfishness and find a new way of living.

43. Pinocchio-P - KICK-ASS *LITERALLY

A song about waging a one-man war against your past self by holding yourself to new standards of not being a bad person, for the sake of your happy future and other people.

44. Iyowa - Until Your Tears Dry

World's Hardest Challenge: Imagine Kerubim singing this to Joris, without crying, throwing up, and then killing yourself.

I think this song fits very well with Dofus Cartoon-era Kerubim, and his thoughts on life, and Hopes and Dreams about Joris not repeating his mistakes in life.

45. Nagisa - Touch

A song about loving someone so gently to the point you'd melt at touching them, and yet hurting them anyway. Dying dying dying.

46. Trickle - Homunculus

A song about having tried everything but still being mentally ill and ashamed of yourself. Because bros, I don't think Kerubim is healthy even during the show, even if he did do a lot of work on himself.

47. Onoken - Fluquor (Deemo OST)

I shit you not, this song is literally canonically (I'm about to spoil a major plot twist from an oldass mobile game) about dying in the arms of your child who has no family left except for you, and your thoughts on it being "Being left alone is scarier for me, than it is for you. I don't think I'm going to heaven. Please hold me just a bit longer... But please don't forget to let go of me before I drag you with me."

Isn't it fucked. Haha. Btw it's one of those songs you should listen to at least once in your life.

48. VocaCircus - Déjà Vu

A song about cyclical relationships. I think it fits Kerubim and Atcham well, esp with them meeting once again in the movie. (Albeit not for long...)

49. syudou - Handle with Care

Imagine using a child to heal your mental illnesses and give you therapy and giving them so much brain damage that they begin to feel pleased when doing that after 6 centuries.

You will NEVER guess why this is on my Kerubim playlist.

50. R.I.P. - Mommy (Twins in Paradise OST)

Vewn's short indie animation "Twins in Paradise" is the closest we as a society will come to experiencing whatever emotions a depressing OVA about Kerubim and Atcham's childhood would make us feel. Marcy and Darcy are LITERALLY Kerubim and Atcham.

51. Hanyuu Maigo - Aun Beats

Listening to this song and thinking about Atcham dying in Kerubim and Joris's arms in the movie is just as emotionally devastating as listening to this song and thinking about the 48487538 years of separation between Qilby and Shinonome, or The Situation between Nora and Efrim.

This song has done a lot for doomed siblings economy, despite not being about siblings and instead the concept of doom itself.

52. Sohta - Twilight Station

I'm insane about Kerubim feeling anxious and ashamed of all his faults and the ways he wronged Atcham (and Joris).

53. Faded Paper Figures - Pointing at the Moon

This song feels the same way Kerubim loves people, and I think it's a good song for the end of the playlist. He loves everyone he's met this way.

54. Faded Paper Figures - Relatively

A general crepinjurgen-core song that touches on the theme of their relationship lasting forever.

[obigem]

"Cordie? What are you doing here?"

Suddenly, before them was the Wendy's McBurger Queen mascot: Prince Burger Boy.

"What? How do you know my name?" Cordie turned to him confused.

"How? Cordie, it's me."

"Me?" She stared at him, and then the voice registered.

"Jai? You're Prince Burger Boy?!"

Unsurprisingly, Jai didn't right away answer her question. Perhaps he was shocked to see her there. Maybe there was a part of him that was embarrassed to have her see him like this. What precipitated was silence.

From everyone, except Matthew.

From him, a loud snort erupted.

"Burger Boy?" He snickered. "Oh, no, wait. I'm sorry, my liege. It's 𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 Burger Boy, is it? Oh, this is—this is too good. I can't breathe!" His snickering evolved into an all out fit of laughter.

"Why did you bring 𝘩𝘪𝘮 here?" The anger in Jai's voice betrayed the smile stitched to his face.

"I didn't bring him here, I mean, he's here, but it's not like that was the intention."

"Why are you with him at all?"

"I can explain that, but that's not why I'm here. I wanted to talk to you."

"I'm working."

"Please. You can't spare a minute?"

Jai hesitated, "Fine, but not here."

Jai pulled Cordie aside a good enough distance away from Matthew so he wouldn't have to be tormented by his laughter.

"So? Why did you come here with him?"

"So now you actually want to talk to me? I've been trying to have a conversation with you for days and you've ignored me."

"I've been busy."

"No, you haven't. You've been avoiding me because—because of—ugh, Jai, I need you to take this seriously. How can I have this conversation when you're wearing that big stupid grin on your face?"

"Big stupid grin? Cordie, it's the costume! I'm not smiling!"

"Well, can you take it off?"

"I can't. I'm on the clock. So, are you going to tell me what you're doing with him?"

"We were just practicing for the cotillion ball."

"Ball?"

"If you'd ever pick up the phone or stay on long enough for more than a word or two, I would've told you that I'm helping him with that. As his partner."

"As his date." Jai's retort was short.

"It's not like that. I'm just doing him a favor, as his friend."

"Does he see it that way?"

"He isn't relevant to why I'm here. I didn't come here just to tell you that. I wanted to talk about what you said at the formal."

"Is there really anything more to talk about regarding that?"

"How can you say that?"

"Cordie, I told you I'm in love with you and you said you loved the song that was playing. I think that kind of says it all."

"I—you—" The words she told Zella were all jumbled in her head now.

There was no way she could say the same words perfectly like she did back then, but she still had a card she could play.

"Thursday night, you usually have the night off, right?"

Jai nodded.

"I'll be attending the cotillion ball with Matthew that night. I'd like you to come."

"It's at the ballroom not far from here. In fact, you can see it from here—"

"Wait, so you want me to come to this ball so I can watch you dance with another guy?"

"I'll be dancing with Matthew, yes, but I'd like to head home with you."

"I…might've picked up an extra shift that night."

"Find someone to cover it for you."

"Cordie. I—"

"You can. Just this one night. I'm not able to say things right, not right now, so I want you to come, to ride home with me, to talk with me, so I can say it all properly. That's all I'm asking."

"I—I don't think—"

"You really won't come?"

[emotionallychargedtowel]

shuffled (sort of)

I was tagged for this by @lurkingshan and it looked like fun, so I made up a way to participate even though I don't listen to music on any of those services that people tend to use for these things. The closest I get is listening to things on youtube so I made a list of songs the YT algorithm suggested to me. That list was a bit long so I used a random number generator to pick ten. Well, I really hit paydirt. I couldn't have come up with a better list if I had chosen it all myself.

And then weeks went by and I sat on this nearly-finished post for no good reason! Now I'm dusting it off and getting it out of my drafts.

I'm never big on tagging people on these things, it makes me incredibly anxious. But after this much time has passed, I really can't imagine doing it. That said, if anyone reads this and feels inspired to do it too, please consider yourself tagged.

Orange Juice - I Can’t Help Myself

One of the best tracks on my favorite Orange Juice album. This is a really good distillation of their sound that shows their influences really clearly (postpunk, classic soul, the Velvet Underground, Chic, the Buzzcocks, etc. etc.) while showing how they did something with them that's completely their own. It doesn't hurt that no one sounds quite like Edwyn Collins.

SZA - Ghost in the Machine

For a couple of years now I've been trading song recommendations with a close friend of mine. In other words, we take turns giving each other a song to listen to. It's been great, in part because our tastes are pretty danged different (though with enough overlap to have common ground). I've found out about a lot of amazing stuff through her but I don't think there's a song that has stuck with me more from this project than Ghost in the Machine. This song just keeps giving me goosebumps after...it's been a year and change, I think.

Taemin - Criminal

Years ago I asked my old internet friend Kate (who I've been interacting with since our livejournal days) about kpop. She has always been better than I am at keeping up with new music and I knew she knew a thing or two about it. She gave me a short list of songs to check out and Criminal was on it. It didn't quite click at first but it stuck in my brain somehow. I came back to it later and boom. It clicked big time. It reminds me of a few things. The la-la-la part definitely has a debt to Kylie Minogue's Can't Get You Out of My Head and the lead-up to the chorus reminds me of Roy Orbison's I Drove All Night. It has a retro quality that probably makes it more palatable to a middle-aged listener like myself but when I hear the synthpop tones of my childhood through a contemporary filter I don't get nostalgia so much as a distorted time-warp feeling (in a nice way).

Brave Girls - We Ride

A while back I was emailing back and forth with another friend of mine who I talk to about music a lot--wow, I didn't know that was going to be such a theme here, but I love it--and we were talking about new and old East Asian pop genres. He made me a list of a few recent kpop and jpop songs that he thought were reminiscent of city pop, an 80s genre out of Japan that's a favorite of his. There were quite a few winners on that list but this song is the one I've listened to the most. There's another theme: sounds from my formative years filtered through a contemporary lens. I can see why my friend associated it with city pop. The combination of disco/funk elements (like that choppy Nile Rodgers guitar part) and soft pop (the harmonies, the synth strings) fits right into that category. These elements were everywhere when I was a kid but they didn't get put together in this way.

Tsunami - Be Like That

This song about a has-been ex-boyfriend is more relatable to me in my 40s than it was when I first heard it in my 20s, but that's how old Jenny Toomey was when she wrote it. I've never gotten super into Tsunami despite liking a couple of their songs quite a lot (this one, and Valentine, from their album Deep End). I should probably revisit them. They always had a way with washy guitars and interesting chords, and Jenny Toomey's voice is legendary for a reason. (The version of I Only Have Eyes for You that she recorded with Grenadine, her side project with Mark Robinson from Unrest and the drummer from the Eggs, makes really good use of that voice. It's fucking exquisite and literally gives me goosebumps.)

Spoon - Me and the Bean

This one's a bit personal. I was active in the indie rock scene in Austin in the early 'aughts when Spoon was transitioning from their status as a cautionary tale of major label abandonment* into the period where they reached greater heights on an indie than that major label ever would have allowed. That scene wasn't very big so it's not surprising that in addition to Girls Can Tell-era Spoon being nearly omnipresent for a period of my life, I also have some personal connections there. Anyway, people seldom notice that this song is a cover. I never saw the Sidehackers, the band who originally performed the song (I'm not sure if they even managed to record it). But if this song ends up being what people remember most about them, it would make a respectable legacy. I don't know the later Spoon stuff as well as this era, but back then, there weren't a lot of Spoon originals that were as overtly emotional as this one. (You didn't typically hear a line like "I have your blood inside my heart" in an original Spoon song.) Britt Daniel may not have written this, but he doesn't hold back in his performance. So I always appreciated how it balanced out the more emotionally reserved style of the other songs on Girls Can Tell.

*They channeled the experience into songwriting to good effect. "The Agony of Lafitte," about the A&R guy that signed them to Elektra before the label screwed them over, is probably my favorite Spoon song.

the Chills - Pink Frost

I feel like so much has been written about this song that there isn't much point trying to say anything about it. It has a truly important place in the history of New Zealand indie music, and the events surrounding it are pretty interesting. But mostly it's just a really well-crafted piece of dark, sneakily poppy post-postpunk. Among people my age with similar tastes to mine, I can't think of a song that ended up on more mixtapes. (Though a friend of mine always used to say he regretted that he couldn't really put it on mixtapes for girls he was interested in because of the whole murdered girlfriend aspect of it.)

Veronica Falls - Misery

This song is obscenely catchy. It only takes one listen to get me singing it to myself in the kitchen for months. It's pretty fun to sing to oneself, in the kitchen or otherwise, but I'm sure it would be a million times more so if you could reproduce the harmonies with a partner. Veronica Falls really are unparalleled in the harmony department, and it's even more enjoyable because they usually use those pretty harmonies to sing about morbid, depressing things. And that juxtaposition never feels like a schtick to me, which it easily could in the wrong hands.

Bolbbalgan4 - Dream

I've gotten into quite a few songs because they were featured on kdramas, but this is the only song where it happened the other way around—I liked it first, then watched Hwarang because of it. There was a video for it on youtube with clips from the series and the song made the show seem more interesting. Not to imply anything negative about the series, I think there's a lot to be said for it. But it was this song that made me want to watch it. I love this kind of super emotional kpop song that's so plentiful in kdramas. Maybe it's because during the decades when rock music was de facto banned in South Korea the country's dominant genre was the ballad. Maybe it's because of that particular brand of despair that kdramas excel at so much, coming up in a slightly different setting. This type of song is just more emotional in a certain way that any other genre I've run across. And this particularly example is, to my mind, the pièce de résistance.

Shearwater - Breaking the Yearlings

This is one of the highlights of Animal Life, which is my favorite Shearwater album. It took me a while to warm up to Shearwater. The thing that really sold me on them was going on a whim to see Jonathan Meiburg play a solo acoustic set in front of a tiny audience at the Cactus Cafe. I think maybe some friends of mine opened for him or something, because something must have gotten me in the door. I ended up being really glad I went. Meiburg's set was downright mesmerizing, and I was sold on Shearwater from that point on. This particular song gets in my head a lot because the washing machine in my building puts out this one repetitive tone when you're starting a load of clothes that is really close to the opening notes of this song.