#AND LO AND BEHOLD....ITS NEXT MONTH
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IT'S....MY TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY WITH REX NEXT MONTH??
#jane journals#self insert talk#💙 oh captain my captain 💙#HOW DID IT SNEAK UP ON ME LIKE THIS HOLY FUCK!!!#my partner was talking about all the upcoming f/o anniversaries she has cause theres lots#and i was like 'hm thats nice i wonder when my next anniversary is coming up' as if ive ONLY kept track of rex#AND LO AND BEHOLD....ITS NEXT MONTH#it feels like this FLEW by 🥺🥺#ive gotta do something for it!! something cool!!#ill figure something out!! i think i have an idea#and maybe write a letter to him 👉👈#ugh i havent seen my husband in a while#ive been watching clone wars with ruby but hes only popped up once or twice in these last seasons#hes gonna have some GREAT arcs im excited for soon tho > w <#every time he popped up for even a second tho i was like hiiiii oh my god hi 💖🫶💖🫶💖🫶💖
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finally have the time to join a splatfest, get a couple crew wipes in salmon run to warm up (can i get matched with whoever is carrying all these people to profreshional +1 bc theres no way they got here on their own) and i almost immediately win a 100x match for team cum rice yippee
#star emoji#literally the other day i was like oh i should check when the next splatfest is i bet we're coming up on the final fest or whatever theyre#calling it. and lo and behold its this weekend and final fest is next month lmao
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Fuck Everything, But Mostly Fuck You
Next Part
Summary: You have never, EVER, in a million years hated anyone the way you hated Felix fucking Catton.
Warnings- MDNI 18+, Felix is delulu, Reader is stressed and homesick and kinda crazy but she a baddie, Michael is Michael, Farleigh is Farleigh, Oliver will be Oliver (a creep), and author has spent too much time researching Oxford crap for this mess for a crack fic to be a crack fic
Author's Note: This fic is a follow-up to this post and I would like to thank grammarly for catching all my grammatical errors 🥲, @ethereal-athalia for enabling my crazy ideas 🥰, and @valeskafics for providing me Saltburn smut when I catch myself thirsting 😇
“FUCK!” you yelled at the top of your lungs just before your nose slammed down on the dewy grass.
Groaning in pain before the mortification of realizing what had just happened kicked in.
You didn’t know what was worse: the fact you had a full front view of the giant’s junk or that he body-slammed you onto the ground and caused you to land on top of the painting worth 30% of your final grade.
You wanted to scream your head off. The paint had finally dried, and you could finally leave the studio at two in the morning. It was close to finals, and pretty much anyone on campus who didn’t get accepted because of their daddy’s bank account was in their dorms. You had hoped that this fact would mean that the paths were empty and, therefore, safe to transport your 30” x 40” canvas.
“SORRY!”
You shot your head up to locate the person who just apologized. Lo’ and behold, it was the same plastered, pasty cunt with a bird’s nest disaster of a haircut drunken idiot who decided it was a good idea to go streaking across campus. His only other distinguishable features were that he was at least 6’3” and that he had a small steel piece pierced on his face.
After the “apology,” he and his friend continued running off to God’s knows where in the dead of night—leaving you behind on the lawn with a bleeding nose, bruised knees and palms, and an oil painting that was torn and caked in mud three days before its deadline.
There was no way to redo it. The project was assigned at the beginning of October. It took 5 hours to set up the models with the motifs and lights, 3 hours to take pictures, and 10 hours to underdraw the preliminary sketch. You didn’t even want to think about the sheer number of sleepless nights you spent in the studio mixing colors and layering. On top of that, you also had your other finals in other courses to study for.
You had practically been living in that studio for the past month. All of the custodians and security guards knew you by name. You got first dibs every day when they refilled the vending machines. It was a true godsend when you didn’t have time to visit the dining halls. Everyone had been so kind and sweet to you. It was a warm welcome compared to the snark and snobbery you experienced from most of your classmates.
Crying from the devastation of the loss of your situation, your shaking legs carried your body and what remained of your work into the building. You knew that your professor stayed in her office late for grading. You could only hope that she would sympathize with your pitiful appearance.
“Wait, so did you get the extension?”
Lifting your head from the sticky library table at Bodleian’s, you stared at your best only friend, Michael Gavey, with a blank stare. You didn’t react to his wince after he took in your haggard appearance. You didn’t need a mirror to know that you looked terrible.
Your eyes were puffy and bloodshot red with dark mulberry bags underneath them. You had paled since coming to dreary England, but now you looked straight-up sickly. And if that wasn’t enough, your eyes had less life than a dead fish rotting at a Sunday Market.
Your voice was so meek that you were sure he had to strain to hear you.
“Yeah…I got it.”
You knew you had no choice but to beg your Studio Arts professor for an extension. But it killed you doing it. Professor Daria Martin was your favorite teacher and the only faculty member who actually liked you. Her support toward you meant everything to you; the last thing you wanted to do was disappoint her, let alone be the reason why she lost her job.
Your usually so snarky four-eyed friend perked up at the news.
“So, is everything okay?” he asked with hope.
Your head fell on neon-yellow ink-stained pages that filled the paperweight your ethics professor called a textbook. A bitter laugh fell from as your lips lifted to a wry, dry grin.
“Oof, not that simple, is it?” he asked.
“Is it ever?”
“So what do you have to do now?”
“Well-,” you lifted your head to take a deep breath as you started to explain, “- I still have the photos and copies of the sketch. But because the canvas was so large, it was special-ordered. That means I need to wait until another one can be delivered, and since all the works need to be completed in the studio, I can’t leave the campus.”
As you finished your explanation, Michael nodded his head in understanding before he paused, and a look of devastation painted his features.
“Wait, so does that mean-”
“I won’t be able to fly back home for the holidays.”
Fuck, you were about to cry again. You had been so excited to see your old friends and family. You remembered how absolutely homesick you were at the beginning of the term. Because you were a scholarship student from America, your parents encouraged you to settle on campus by moving to your dorm earlier than everyone else. It was bad enough that you missed Thanksgiving, but you had really set your heart on coming home for Christmas and New Year’s. What made it worse was that your parents had told you all about the dinner they had planned for your homecoming. It was going to be a feast of all your favorites.
English food sucked balls.
Your only saving grace was the Crunchie bars Michael got for you when you studied together or when you had to rewrite edit his essays.
You really DID cry after first reading his essay for Introductory English class at the beginning of the year.
“Did you try to report it?”
“Report what? ‘Hey, there’s a wasted asshole running naked across campus, and he body-slammed me to the ground and tore my fucking massive campus that blocked my view of the jackass. He’s probably richer than the goddamn Queen, given how he’s wasted right before finals.’”
“Do you have any description of him?”
“He’s a giant with a small eyebrow piercing, and his fat ass looked like it had never seen the sun.”
Without lifting your head, you heard the scrape of Michael’s chair before he walked across the table to sit in the chair next to you.
“Hey,” he began, bringing you into a warm arm hug, “it’ll be okay. You called your parents about it, right?”
“Yeah -” you sighed before continuing, “- they told me they understood and would Skype me daily.”
“See! Everything’s going to be – wait, did you say that this guy was tall?”
Furrowing your brow in confusion, you looked at your friend at the change in his tone from light and supportive to sharp and interrogative.
“Yeah?”
“How tall?”
“Umm,” you had to think about that, “I’d say he was about 6’3” or above? He was really fucking tall.”
“And he had an eyebrow piercing?”
Ok, now you were really confused. “Yes? Michael, where are you going with this?”
“I think the guy who ran you over was Felix Catton.”
You shot your favorite idiot with a deadpan glare.
“Felix Catton? The same Felix Catton who just so happens to be the same Felix Catton you hate?”
Michael solemnly nodded. “It’s him. It has to be. The only person on campus as tall as him is his cousin, and he doesn’t have piercings.”
“And he’s black.”
“Yeah, that too.”
You were skeptical, and it showed. You didn’t want to callously dismiss your friend, but you knew more than anyone how much his hatred for Oxford’s Golden Boy could impair his judgment. You were by no means a fan of the guy, but accusing someone of anything they didn’t do just because your friend thought so went against your principles.
He grabbed your arm and dragged you to the bookshelf in front of the table where Felix and his groupies sat. Both of your books and bags were in your chairs, but you managed to keep your spiral notebook with you. It wasn’t hard to find them – they were the loudest table in the entire library. They also reeked of cigarettes and booze.
“See?” Michael hissed. “Giant, pale, and eyebrow piercing. It’s him!”
“Michael,” you softly groaned, “just because you hate Felix Catton doesn’t mean you can –”
An extremely shrill voice interrupted you.
“I can’t believe you and Farleigh actually ran around campus naked!”
A petite girl with full pink lips and dull red hair latched on the arm of the man of the hour. “It was so hot to watch!”
This girl has weird-ass tastes in guys.
“And then how you crashed into that dunce at Ruskin! Brilliant!”
Your blood ran cold while another one of Catton’s faceless droning puppets chimed in.
“God, what an idiot! It’s their own fault, anyway. Who the fuck walks in the middle of the walk path with a fucking big canvas in front of them?”
One of the lessons hammered into your skull young was never to move before you think. That lesson had saved you ten ways from Sunday. But this was not one of those times.
You’re pretty sure that you hear Michael calling out your name as you walk away from the shelf and towards the overcrowded table. Tunnel vision took over you as you made your way to the overgrown idiot who almost cost you your entire future.
Grabbing the back of his shirt collar, you dragged the 6’5” towering fool on his ass all the way outside. You finally let go when the two of you reached the back of the building that had no windows.
“Hey, what the fu –”
You didn’t let him finish as you brought your fist to hit him square in the face – and, fuck, did you relish the crunch that immediately followed your swing.
Fuck, was his head killing him.
Felix should have known better than to have gotten cross-faded last night, but Farleigh had practically goaded him to do it. It’s not like his cousin ever had to worry about his grades for any of his courses during finals – the little shit-starter had always been so fucking academically gifted.
He skipped pretty much all of his morning classes and barely made it to his afternoon schedule on time while completely zoning out the entire time.
If he bombs on all his finals, his dad was going to absolutely murder him. But chances were he and his mum were going to be too busy entertaining whichever new friend his mum brought in for shelter.
“You alright there, champ?”
Felix swiveled his head too quickly and immediately groaned in pain. The motion made his hangover even worse. Rubbing his eyes to try to soothe the pounding in his head, he slowly opened them to look at his cousin.
The slag didn’t have the decency to look even a little bit affected from last night’s event – the fucker. No, he was sitting there with all Cheshire grins and gleaming eyes while Felix was two seconds from heaving his guts out.
“Yeah, I’m alright, mate.” He replied in a tired groan.
“Must have been quite the night. Wonder if it had anything to do with that little cocktail you took from our sweet Annabel’s belly button?”
Disgust was clear on Felix’s face as he recalled the body shot he had taken from his ex-FWB’s navel. He truly must have been off his rocker last night – he thought he was over with body shots since graduating secondary, but apparently not.
If he somehow got an STD from doing it, V was going to kill him.
But even with all of his horrible actions that caused the raging war inside his skull, that wasn’t the main cause of his misery.
Farleigh’s grin dropped as judgment painted his features.
“Oh,” he moaned, “please tell me this isn’t about ‘your angel’ from last night.”
He didn’t just take the dare of streaking across the grounds just for the hell of it. He needed an excuse to pass through the art building – all for the chance of seeing you.
You. His angel of paints and books who lived in the empty studio rooms of Oxford University’s Ruskin School of Art and whose presence harangued him every hour of every day. Everywhere Felix went, he would unconsciously look for you.
It was his soul calling out for yours – he knew it.
Felix had never felt so drawn to another human being in his entire existence. He’d never seen you outside of the libraries, art building, and maybe the dining hall if he was lucky. You never went to any parties or even had a drink at the pub at King’s Arms. He didn’t even have classes with you, but he knew Farleigh did. Word was that you and his cousin had shared a few classes – what’s more was that you were likely the only person who could go head-to-head with him in academics.
And to make it worse, the prat refused to tell him anything about you – not even your fucking name.
“Believe me,” he told him after Felix had been begging his cousin for hours to share anything about you, “she is way above your league.”
Which really hurt his feelings, by the way – sure, you were probably way above in book smarts, but there wasn’t a girl that remained indifferent to his charms after a good talking fucking.
“I still can’t believe you won’t at least tell me her name,” Felix complained once more, “or even just give me her number!”
“She’s an American here on scholarship and a bore,” he quipped back, “what’s there to tell? And can you please shut up? I want to get some reading done before tonight. You do remember the in-class essay we have tomorrow, right?”
Bloody hell, he did not. Pushing down the bitter feeling in his chest, he and his cousin made their way to meet everyone at the back. As soon as he sat down, Annabel clung on to his arm. Thank fuck he had been wearing one of his thicker jumpers – otherwise, her claws that she called nails would have ripped open the fabric.
“Hey, Felix!” she made sure to offer a very generous sight of her cleavage, “are you ready for tonight?”
Felix chuckled lowly before responding. “Aren’t I always?”
And just like that – he completely zoned out the rest of the conversation.
Annabel was probably saying something to get him to notice her, and Farleigh was likely responding so he wouldn’t have to – but Felix couldn’t be bothered to pretend to care.
He was lost in the living daydream that was his angel that haunted the art studios of Ruskin School of Art.
He was desperate to learn everything about you.
If he asked you to talk about your favorite books, would your eyes sparkle in delight, or would your smile widen in glee?
If he grabbed your hand, would your palms feel marred by his rough skin, or would you press your callouses to his?
If he pressed his mouth on yours, would your lips feel as soft and plump as they look? Or was their luster forever damaged by your teeth biting them whenever you were in deep concentration?
If he breathed in your scent at the crook of your neck, would your skin smell like the paints forever on your brushes or the musky pages of heavy ancient books you always carried in your arms?
If he planted kisses from your throat to your breasts, would you mewl in pleasure or whimper in anticipation?
If he touched your cunt, would you arch your back in ecstasy? Or would your legs crumble, and you would have no choice but to sink into his arms?
Felix’s thoughts were rudely interrupted when Farleigh jammed his bony elbow into his ribcage and hurriedly whispered.
“Look alive, Golden Boy.”
Looking forward, it was better than any of his wet dreams combined. It was you.
Your hair was loose, and your fists were clenched. You reminded him of a ferocious lion goddess with how focused your gaze was on him.
But before Felix would prepare himself to make a good impression, you walked behind him and grabbed the back of his shirt collar before fucking dragging his ass out of his seat and outside.
Bloody hell, for someone so much shorter than him, you were fucking strong.
When you finally released your grip, he fell on the ground like an idiot before he tried to stand and steady himself as quickly as he could.
“Hey, what the fu –”
You didn’t let him finish as you brought your fist to hit him square in the face – and, fuck, you might have actually broken his nose.
After staggering back, you started using the spiral notebook in your other hand to land blow after painful blow on his body.
“YOU. STUPID. FUCKING. INGRATE –” Each word that left your mouth was emphasized with another hit from your notebook “– I. HATE. YOU. YOU. RUINED. MY. PAINTING. I. SPENT. SO. MUCH. TIME. ON. IT. AND. NOW. I. CAN’T. GO. HOME. FOR. BREAK. BECAUSE. OF. YOUR. STUPID. SELF!”
Felix was confident you had more to say, but you were pulled off him by your friend – he’s pretty sure it’s Mitchell – by the waist with you kicking and screaming out profanities to him as your friend called out your name to try to calm you down.
He wondered what it said about him if he told anyone how much you looked like an angry cat. His parents would send him to a shrink if he told them how adorable he found you right now.
If you were this wild while fighting, he could only imagine how riled up you would get in bed.
Fuck, you might have just unlocked a new kink in him.
Catching his breath as he watched your friend drag you away into the distance, he heard a slow clap to his left.
Farleigh was leaning on the corner – his smug expression making it clear that he had seen the whole thing – as he looked at his cousin with a bemused expression before walking toward him and giving a sympathetic pat on his back.
“Well,” he started to break the tension, “at least you know her name.”
“Yeah,” Felix agreed, “I know her name.”
And he knew that you smelled more like the paints on your brushes than the books you carried with subtle notes of gardenias.
Tagging: @aemondsbabe, @ethereal-athalia, @aphroditesmoon, @barbiedragon, @valeskafics, @lexyysworld, @punkiwiki, @saltburnedme, @arcielee
Let me know if you want to be tagged for future Saltburn fics!
#saltburn x reader#saltburn#saltburn crack#saltburn au#felix catton x reader#farleigh catton#farleigh start#venetia catton#oliver quick#michael gavey#saltburn 2023#saltburn movie#michael gavey x reader
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The third anniversary trailer of twst is interesting to me because of its foreshadowing/ominous feelings with the way it cuts the scenes. Well, in terms of Lilia and Malleus when you think about it.
This is, of course, going off of certain assumptions.
For one, the shadow below being Malleus and not another student 🤔 (we already saw Leona enter Ramshackle by this point and Vil and Rook is already there at the party idia and his brother are in their room and Cater and Trey are baking, so it’s highly likely that is it Malleus)
Assuming this shadow is Malleus, we see he’s alone with no one around.
Going forward to the rest of the trailer:
Someone walking up the stairs, alone. No one is next to them and the sign we saw before? Is behind them.
You’re probably wondering why do I get that ominous/foreshadowing feeling and it’s because of the next few scenes.
Vil and Rook looking towards the newcomers to the party and lo and behold.
Our faes of Diasomnia, with Lilia right there next to Malleus.
Lilia was not there before. There was no shadow of him being there at all in the beginning with the anniversary sign, and even with the stair scene, no floating lower half of said fae (no matter how high he’s floating, you should see at least a part of his body or shadow)
And we see Grim being patted by the invite.
Invites of any kind have significant meaning for Malleus. We know how much he wants to be invited and we know how they will have already been/will be used in Book 7.
So I can’t help but wonder. What could this mean?
Does this have some connection to Lilia? A foreshadowing of the future? Why isn’t Lilia there?
But then, if you recall, Malleus offered Lilia his happiest dream in book 7, one without Malleus in it.
And then the thought hit, what if? This is Malleus’ dream? One where he is invited? To a celebration where everyone can have fun and be merry?
A party that’s not celebrating his father’s departure and no one is sad at the end of it?
What if Lilia’s shadow missing is the hint to all this?
Wouldn’t that be the best way to show this? Lilia who Malleus loves so much and doesn’t want to lose and the reason why Malleus OB.
It would make sense if this was Malleus’ dream, wouldn’t it?
We all wondered why did this anniversary trailer focus only on the third years? And not the rest like previous years right?
The third years are important in the aspect that those are who Mal is “closest” with and they are his classmates who he spent all these years with (people who are not Lilia, Silver, and Sebek specifically and people who he can essentially talk to without them running away in fear as we have seen).
Another point that I believe adds onto this theory is the release date for this trailer, and in correlation, main story release.
The third anniversary trailer was released in March 2023, while Book 7 chapter 2 was released the month before, specifically 2/27/23. (Thank you Mumble for helping me find this info @irafuwas 💞💚)
Chapter 2, the chapter where Malleus puts everyone to sleep, giving them their happiest dreams. The chapter where, you know, Lilia gives Malleus an invite to his….going away party hahaha 🙃🥲
Everyone except Malleus is asleep. Now wouldn’t this be a devious way of foreshadowing on the twst devs side? A hint of not only Malleus’ dreams and the possibility of him falling asleep but also the way the invites will be used in the future (as we now see with Idia’s plan)?
This trailer being Malleus’ dream would also explain the discrepancies between the Grims in the trailer.
Despite the size change inconsistency with Grim (he has such a big head lmao), you see the outfits as well. Grim isn’t wearing his ceremonial robes (something he is so proud of and I doubt he would just take off) and he’s back to his ribbon (his everyday uniform)
Also take in the fact of the backgrounds, the one with Vil and Rook has bright colors and saturation while the other is darker with the sun setting. (Don’t get me started on the symbolism of the sun or sunset)
This can also show how it’s dream vs reality. Especially if you consider what Malleus considers a happy dream.
Malleus, who didn’t understand or, rather, can’t accept/is in denial (I’m going to run him over with Crewel’s car) that his hatching was Lilia’s happiest dream. That all that pain and suffering led to something so joyous.
He, the one who continued to offer a happy dream that didn’t include him but his parents and Silver to Lilia.
Would the bright colors not show this? How he thinks “happy” dreams should be? As oppose to reality with the darker hues in the other scene?
And then we see currently, how the twst boys are fighting/rejecting the “happy” dreams as well. Which adds onto these points as well. Them fighting against this path chosen for them.
[also, the emphasis of invites, getting along with others, being empathetic, caring (/guarding Silver), and understanding others’ views (as well as wanting to be understood) as we saw with Malleus’ tsum card adds on to this does it not? 👀🤔 Tsum tsum events, after all, does give hints to main story as well]
If this was the twst devs way of foreshadowing future events and giving us hints of Malleus’ dream, then I can’t wait to see what we have in store.
In short, no one hold me back! I have a mallet with Malleus and Lilia’s names on it and I’m not afraid to use it!!!! 😖😤
(Absjsjshs I can’t stop laughing omg, Mumble said he was ‘strangely’ invited for once and I’m dying of laughter 😂😆 *covering eyes 😅😅* he’s going to be strangely invited to Idia’s party alright absjsjffnfnf 😆🤣😅)
#🌺mumble🌺#i already know mal’s ob flashback is going to kill me but imagine we see his DREAM?!#I am going to cry I already know it#been wanting to write this theory for awhile but didn’t know how to word it until today so yay 🥳🥳💞💞#twst theory#twst theories#lilia vanrouge#malleus draconia#twst analysis#twst character analysis#twst book 7#diasomnia#twst lilia vanrouge#twst malleus draconia#twst grim#twst#twisted wonderland
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You say you "know the timeline" yet you mention that SJM no longer spoke about ships after she signed on for the spin-off books.
Which was after ACOMAF, and as she was finishing up ACOWAR.
Elriel and Vassien were only introduced in ACOWAR.
So, please tell us: when was SJM supposed to talk about Elriel and Vassien, when - as you yourself stated - Sarah “went quiet on things because Bloomsbury wanted her future books to remain a mystery.”
If Sarah wasn’t able to talk about Elucien post-ACOWAR, then when they hell is she supposed to talk about Elriel and Vassien (who again, were only introduced in ACOWAR)?
The point is: all of the Elucien “evidence” is contained to 2016. Mere months after ACOMAF.
Yet the narrative shifts in ACOWAR. Moriel is squashed, and Elriel and Vassien begin.
As such, your screenshots of “Elucien proof” never this into account. Context matters.
Actually she got signed for the spin offs while editing ACOMAF, it's clearly stated in her Live Talks LA with Eva Cheng.
In my last post I said she no longer spoke of ships once Bloomsbury put her on lockdown so they could cash in on the drama surrounding the next book after Nesta's. She admitted as much in an interview with Steph, that if fans are excited they'll want to make it a thing. If I said in a previous post she stopped talking about ships after signing for the spin offs (since she did talk about Elucien after that but before ACOWAR was published) than I apologize for the error but that doesn't mean I haven't figured it out since or other Elucien's haven't already known.
My point was more in regards to the fact that no Elucien is confused about her Elucien mentions not being recent, they include the image which HAS THE DATE ON IT. Almost all are aware of exactly what year those interviews were done yet you're phrasing it as if we think they happened recently. Nobody claimed she spoke of Elucien after ACOWAR and just because Lucien went after Vassa because he believed in Elain's vision, it doesn't mean the Vassien ship was introduced by the author in ACOWAR 😂. He literally looked at Elain with longing and went off on a suicide mission for her, met her father, and ran to her side (bloody and panting) after the war. It's confirmed SHE'S HIS FRIEND in the next book. Male characters are allowed to have female characters as friends without wanting a relationship with them.
Then continued looking at Elain with longing in SF while paying no attention to Vassa when she looked to Lucien to break up her argument with Jurian. 😂 So ship like!
Context does matter and there's zero of it for Vassien when she and Jurian share the same vision, not she and Lucien.
Also:
ACOMAF
Come now, you can't honestly be trying to tell me e/riel was only introduced in ACOWAR, completely tearing down the entire 4 books of buildup argument your fellow e/riels have been using for years now because it suddenly becomes important to this newest post that e/riel only has "3 books of buildup!"
According to elriels, elriel WAS introduced in ACOMAF yet it was Elucien she spoke of after its release.
And the evidence of SJM saying there was someone special for Lucien on Twitter was said in 2015, prior to the release of ACOMAF which was April 2016.
It's weird how the context supports Elucien being mates, where she personally supplied where they'd vacation together and how they're both happiest in nature yet she supposedly knocked that all down in the very next book. So strange how in one of those same interviews she spoke about Nessian but lo and behold they are still together!
You guys keep trying, I'll give you credit. A+ for perseverance but D - for execution.
Still waiting for that evidence of when the author has ever talked about elriel or Vassien in interviews!
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Star Wars Rebels is one of my favorite shows. I can still remember back when it was just a planned project I'd occasionally hear about either online or in a commercial on Disney XD. I found it a bit funny at the time, because I remembered wondering what they were gonna name the next show after The Clone Wars--because obviously there was gonna be a show after The Clone Wars--and lo and behold I got my answer; Star Wars Rebels (way better than Star Wars Galactic Civil War). I caught the trailers, interviews and the character profile videos online and even managed to catch the shorts during the months leading up to the premiere. Little eleven year old me was optimistic that somehow this show would help fill the Clone Wars shaped hole in my heart.
And boy did it. I remember watching the premiere sitting on the floor, loving every second of it. I especially felt connected to Ezra, who, at that point, was the Star Wars protagonist that I was the closest to in age. Next thing I knew, three and a half years had gone by and the Rebels finale ended up being one of the most emotionally distressing episodes of television that I had ever viewed. At first I didn't like the epilogue funnily enough, but soon came to realize that it was perfect.
This show means a lot to me. It was never the most popular in the fandom, honestly it felt like a good chunk of TCW fans just wish it didn't exist, still bitter about Clone War's cancellation and blaming Rebels for it. The show was chided as childish and silly (this is a Star Wars show we're talking about btw), the animation was cheaper than the later few seasons of Clone Wars, the lower rating meant that it couldn't get away with the same level of violence as Clone Wars and the only things about it that were universally praised were the elements and characters that related to Clone Wars. It felt like Rebels, like many of its own characters, just couldn't escape the shadow of The Clone Wars. But those of us who watched and kept up with it, grew to love its characters, its art, its music and its story--we knew that Rebels was special in its own way. I honestly believe now that Rebels surpasses The Clone Wars in many regards and it's been exceedingly vindicating to see Rebels increase in popularity and become well-respected by the community at large.
Rebels still one of the only pieces of media to really make me engage with fandom at a deeper level, for better or worse. I definitely wouldn't have made this tumblr account last year if it weren't for me rewatching the show with my family and getting back into the swing of things. And I probably wouldn't have found the courage to try and get into art earlier this year if it weren't for that either. So...I owe this show a lot and I got more to say but...I don't think I'll ever find the words that could properly convey what this show means to me.
Happy 10th anniversary Star Wars Rebels, I'm thankful for the decade we've had together. I wish I had more to show my appreciation, but for now I suppose this study/redraw of some concept art I did for art class will do.
Shoutouts to Rebels Recon, y'all were an indelible part of the experience that more of the newer fans need to check out.
Star Wars Rebels Appreciation Week: Day #1 - Favorite Character
Ezra Bridger
#my favorite piece of Star Wars#only Return of the Jedi and Visions come close#star wars#star wars rebels#star wars rebels 10th anniversary#rebelsweek 2024#rebelsweek2024#Ezra Bridger#Blueberry#swr fanart#I've been waiting to use this next tag for a very long time#my art#me rambles#REBELS 10th ANNIVERSARY
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sorry. i guess i have to do this a second time
wip. whatever. i just woke up
been tagged by dears @henbased @socially-awkward-skeleton to share a wip! sadly haven’t gotten much new writing done following a stressful weekend, so here’s a short little piece from one of the comfort prompts that got way too long. warnings for discussions of stalking and graphic violence, you know how they get.
“How did —” she runs a frustrated hand through her hair, pushing it back towards the opossum still clinging there. “How did you even find my spot?! You stalkin’ me now?” A sharp grin carves itself into his face to push back the modest rounds of his cheeks and deepen the sag of his laugh lines, his eyes lighting up with an irritatingly proud twinkle. He slides a hand beneath his vest, pulling out a sleek smartphone with a cross insignia on its case. “Scathing negative reviews of Snowshoe Lake suddenly popped up last night on Fishbrain, FishHub, ANGLR — even AllTrails and 27 Crags mentioned the nearby mountain pass being subpar.” “You saw somewhere with shitty reviews and figured you belonged there?”
“I figured it was the work of my clever, reclusive little angler slyly marking her territory.” A slow bat-batting of his eyelashes punctuates the statement. “And lo and behold, here you are.” The hinge of her jaw; her nose twitches. “I like my privacy,” she drawls slowly, so that he may understand. “Now that we’ve gone over the how, maybe we can move on to why the fuck you’re here? And when you’ll be fucking leaving?” If it’s within the next ninety seconds, perhaps she can still salvage her perfect day. “Why, you haven’t been keeping track?” His tongue clicks against his teeth with a furrow of his brow in a contrived display of woundedness. “We’re celebrating our one month anniversary today!” She snarls and bugs her eyes. “Great! Our fake relationship reached a fake milestone I wouldn’t even celebrate if it was real!” “Do you think that attitude could have been a contributing factor to the death of your real relationship?” She thinks how beautiful her fishing knife would look lovingly buried to the hilt in his jugular, the sweet glug glug glug he would make choking on his own blood. She thinks about how pretty he would look with that sharp grin sliced to gape and droop like a catfish’s mouth. “I think interrupting my fishin’ time is about to be a contributing factor in your death,” she settles on. “The only way you’re gonna be any good to me around here is if I chop you up into little bits and use you to bait my fucking hook.”
no pressure tags out to @wrathfulrook @fourlittleseedlings @galaxycunt @cassietrn @florbelles @g0dspeeed @unholymilf @belorage @shallow-gravy @roofgeese @socially-awkward-skeleton @corvosattano @inafieldofdaisies @direwombat @afarcryfrommymain @poetikat @blissfulalchemist @deputyash @confidentandgood @captastra @voidika @just-another-wasteland-merc @strangefable @8bitpizzacoupons @stacispratt @orionlancasterr @v0idbuggy @jackiesarch @strafethesesinners @henbased @simplegenius042 @clicheantagonist @firstaidspray @quickhacked @miyabilicious @nightbloodbix @thedeadthree @shellibisshe + join/unjoin my wip day tag list by liking/unliking here!
#was gonna use this short little prompt to fight with my life playing around with present tense and now it is getting out of control#they just get carried away when they flirt://#wip
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Okay fellas, the Githyanki Dragon-Blooded Sorcerer poll has closed, with the Illegal Egg backstory in the lead, followed by Por Que No Los Dos, so I have made a Legal + Illegal Egg combo!
Behold! Isk'Irthos (Secret Star in Draconic! That's important!)
Isk is the result of the forbidden love between a kith'rak and their dragon, who'd often take a smaller, Dragonborn-esque form to adventure with them. Isk's kith'rak parent obviously could not bear her egg, as this union had not been sanctioned by Vlaakith, so her dragon mother, Malsvir, laid the egg on the Material Plane instead, hiding away and awaiting the promised moment when her partner would rejoin them.
Their plans never came to be, though, as the kith'rak was executed by the Inquisition for possessing forbidden literature on Prince Orpheus. So as days of waiting turned into months, and months into years, and the skies still showed no sign of her beloved, Malsvir had no choice but to raise the child on her own.
In their secluded home, in a clearing surrounded by a thicket of brambles that a dragon would easily fly over but few wingless two-legged would trudge through unscathed, Malsvir trained little Isk in sorcery and told her stories of her past glorious battles with the kith'rak. Isk grew restless, however, leaving Malsvir at a loss: she had little frame of reference for raising children, save for the Githyanki youths she'd observed in creches. The one thing she did know was that, even with their strict upbringing, the hatchlings were always surrounded by their peers in the creche dormitories. She obviously would never allow Isk to venture out and make friends her age, so according to her dragon logic, the next best thing would be to fly to the next village over and abduct some kids for her daughter to play with.
That obviously did not end well. The horrified and distraught parents hired a band of adventurers to slay the dragon and rescue their children. The quest... appeared to be successful (Malsvir did survive, but at the moment, she was gravely wounded, and everyone assumed she was dead, not taking the time to check because there was a crowd of traumatized kids to deal with). A grief-stricken Isk lashed out at the adventurers, but the fear in the children's eyes stopped her from eviscerating them with her ever-growing sorcerer powers.
She fled into the wilderness and made do for a while, a feral thing always covered in burrs and brambles, until she was captured by a hunter, who, never having seen any creature like her, brought her to a wandering freak show. The show's legal status was as dubious as its quality, and most of the other "exhibits" were hapless Tieflings in heavy makeup masquerading as succubi, and dead animals bizarrely stitched together into vague imitations of beholders and chimeras.
Isk, though, was the real deal, and the ring master was delighted to parade her around... When she was not kicking and biting and trying to toss fire balls at him. The safest bet, he found, was to cast a simple sleep spell on her and prop her up in a chair or on a couch on the stage for people to come and gawk at.
It was from one of those spells that she awoke one day, face to face with the prettiest human boy she had ever seen. He said his name was Wyll; his father was in the Flaming Fist, and he had discovered the underground freak show (all by himself!) and tipped the Fist off, which resulted in the operation getting shut down and the ring master being arrested.
The hideous stuffed animals were disassembled, and the staff were finally free to go back home... Except Isk, who had no home. Wyll generously offered her to stay with him, and they spent a few blissful moments — like a happy dream — exploring the city together. But that did not last.
Wyll's father was an important man, rubbing shoulders with nobility, and the cream of the crop of Baldur's Gate certainly did not treat Isk like the princess Wyll insisted on seeing in her. Vile whispers abounded, exacerbating Isk's teenage angst (already bad enough, after the trauma of losing her mother and being forced into a freak show). She started to grow distant from Wyll, terrified that he'd reject her budding crush on him, and in the vacuum that formed in his absence, ominous figures were quick to step in. The cult of Tiamat recognized her as the child of a dragon, and offered what Isk, at the time, young and confused, mistook for succor and meaning.
Eventually, she stopped seeing Wyll entirely, quietly disappearing from his home; the cult groomed her to take part in some manner of grand ritual, and in just a couple of years, she was more than ready to welcome Tiamat herself, the one entity they said would understand her pain.
Then, along came Tiamat's rival Zariel, and Mizora, and the confrontation with Wyll. They briefly locked eyes as he was laying waste to the cult with his newfound powers, and it was at that moment that Isk realized what she had almost done. Once again, she stepped away from the carnage, hidden under an invisibility spell, and witnessed Wyll's father banish him. She wanted to chase after him, to explain that Wyll was telling the truth, that there really had been a cult in the city... But she was intercepted by Githyanki warriors.
By then, through the followers of her ally Tiamat, Vlaakith had learned of a curious child, half-Githyanki, half-dragon; and there was nothing she coveted more than the child's sorcery-imbued soul. She sent her scouts after her; and while Malsvir had told her daughter some stories of the Prince of the Comet, all of Isk's subsequent torment had turned them into hazy half-memories, and she was easy to persuade that with Vlaakith, at last, she'd find the truth and purpose and sense of belonging she'd failed to reach with Tiamat.
Once again, she turned away from Wyll — perhaps for the best; her heart ached too much when she thought of him — and was taken to a creche on a different planet, where she was rigorously reshaped into an obedient tool for Vlaakith. Her coming of age was somewhat delayed compared to other youths, as she was a late arrival, but after ten years of Githyanki discipline, she was deemed worthy of her rite of passage and eventual ascension... Until along came a very peculiar ghaik vessel.
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#bg3 tav#githyanki#wyll ravengard#wyll x tav#original things#also fun fact malsvir and qudenos are siblings! that big boi is isk's uncle!#she probably assumes that he and voss are lovers because it's like. normal for her#and yeah i sprinkled in some elements of a dark sleeping beauty retelling#malsvir straight-up means 'evil' in draconic#the maleficent movie had such a grip on teen me#so see what i did there
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Sundae
Part 2: One Scoop Chocolate
(A Sun Dog Story)
It had been a week since he had met the kit. Over that week, the two had formed an inseperable bond. They helped each other out, she would scout the area and alert him of any dangers. She was so good he couldn't count how many run ins with the little ones he had already avoided. In return, all she wanted was his love. And food, but mainly love.
"Hey guys, I think our new friend is lightening up a bit!"
That day, it had been awfully quiet. No birds singing, no crickets chirping, not even the buzzing of flies. All the two heard were the shuffling of leaves and twigs as he crawled around. He suddenly stopped, setting the kit down right in front of him. He looked in the distance, almost as though he was in a trance. When all of a sudden, he spoke.
"You know, it's a bit sad. You've been by my side for a bit, possibly will be there til we both reach our end. And I still haven't given you a name."
She tilted her head in confusion.
"Oh, you know, a name....who am I kidding, you wouldn't know, you"re just a pup. Have I even told you my name?"
They both stood in silence before she tilted her head the other way. He chuckled a bit.
"Well then, I'll give each other introductions then. My name is......Dogday. And you...hmm, let's see. You're small, you're red....Bobby? No, no, you aren't a bear, but you've got the smile down. Hmm...I'll have to think about tha-"
BANG!
A gunshot destroyed the silence, the fox and the hound were both startled. But he knew there shouldn't be any gunshots, not in these woods. Signs were plastered everywhere, "NO HUNTING." Someone was out there, and they weren't following the rules.
Suddenly, they heard a rustling in the distance. The little ones, yet again? No, this sounded bigger, faster. Closer. Closer. And there it was, running their way, a young deer, couldn't be anymore than 5 months old. It didn't notice the two canines as it ran past, hiding itself behind a tree, and they followed suit.
Not far behind it was the culprit. Older fellow, very well kept. But he had that look in his eyes, he wasn't all there. He kept giggling, like this was a game, like it was fun. But come on, he couldn't be that depraved, right?
"Come on out, you little coward! If I get you that'll make my count 13, and that's just today's tally!"
(Fun fact: narrators hate it when they're wrong)
Dogday could hear every psychotic thing this man had to say. He was making this forest a waking nightmare for every creature here. And he despised that.
"Stay here, please. I'm about to teach him a lesson."
He crawled as silently as he could, just until he could get right behind the hunter. And then, when the moment was right....YANK! He pulled him to the ground, right at his level. The hunter was shocked, what did that to him? His answer was right there, inches away from his face. He couldn't even muster a scream.
"Leave. Never come back. Or I will do to you...what was done to me."
The hunter sat there in a mixture of fear and confusion, even after the dog had gotten off of his lap. He took one quick glimpse at his torso. The buttons clicked.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"
He ran off like a scared animal. Good.
He crawled his way over to the tree to see if the deer was still there. Lo and behold, there it was, laying next to the kit. Seeing as they were all stressed, he knew what he had to do. He took one deep breath in, and one, long, relaxing breath out. It was at that moment, in the vanilla clouds, that he had an epiphany.
"So, it looks like we have another one joining us, huh kid? Well, lucky for the both of you, I've figured out what I'm going to call the both of you!"
He picked up the kit, "I think Strawberry's a good name for you, you sweet, red little thing." She yipped and barked in glee.
He then crawled over to the deer, slowly and gently placing his hand on its head, "As for you, I'm calling you Chocolate." It put its head on his, its tail slowly wagging.
It was getting late, but where they were was comfortable as is. They all huddled together in front of a makeshift fire, and another night went by. A safe night, all together.
"Oh, hey you! Come on, there's always more than enough room for another friend!"
#poppy playtime#poppy playtime au#cryptid au#cryptozoology#cryptids of spielzeit#cryptids#do you believe#don't go into the woods#smiling critters#dogday#strawberry#chocolate#vanilla#fox#deer#dog#neopolitan#short story#writing#original writing
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A love letter to the Winxsource server.
This post is a gift for the wonderful people on the @winxsource server, and its amazing moderators. Sorry in advance, it has become quite a long read, heh.
At the start of 2023 I had been reading several Fate fanfics to cope with the second season's ending, and the closely followed cancellation of the show near the end of 2022.
This quickly sparked a renewed interest for writing (the last time I wrote for fun was literally more than a decade ago). Heck, seeing the art and gifs even inspired me to do fanart.
I joined a FTWS Discord server, and a few months later this led me to another Discord server where, lo and behold, several of the people who I'd been reading fics from and/or whose fanart I had enjoyed were chatting and hanging out!
At first I felt very star-struck. Many of these people had been writing, drawing, etc, for years, and here I came, a total newbie to fanfiction and fanart. Next to that, depression had dragged my self-esteem through the mud for the past few years, which had made creating a lot harder.
But everyone was and still is so incredibly nice and funny. An abundance of jokes, love and support goes around, and people are eager to help when asked. There are no stupid questions, you’re not silly for liking very specific things, and everyone respects each other.
And that takes me to the ones who organise it all.
I want to hereby thank @skloomdumpster and @fitztragedy for moderating the server, organising all of the events, providing support when needed, and just being the lovely and fun people that they are (and a shoutout to @septemberrie and @shadowofnight as well!). You are amazing, and I hope we’ll get to enjoy your server for a long time!
Now, at the risk of becoming way too sappy, and before finally releasing you from this wall of text, I want to say this:
The people in the Fate: The Winx Saga fandom, especially the Winxsource server, have given me a reason to create again. I’ve always had the hardest time to just create for myself, with my own brain kicking my butt constantly. This still happens of course, but it has become increasingly easier to keep trying, stay motivated, and to even become proud of what I create.
Knowing that, no matter what I create, there will always be at least one person who will enjoy it, has been one of the most important lessons and experiences I've had this past year.
It's as some have said before: it's like having little pocket friends that I get to speak to every day. Isn't that amazing?
Thank you, truly,
and I hereby wish you all a very happy and healthy 2024. May it be filled with an abundance of good laughs and lots more new Fate content!
Love,
Hillie
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[2:01]
“can’t sleep?”
you would say your roommate just standing there in the dim light of the kitchen counts as a jumpscare, but he looks too good for that.
“no,” you sigh. “we gotta stop meeting like this, you know.”
it’s a relief when doyoung smiles at your admittedly lame joke, but for some reason, there’s a tension in the air you can’t explain. it hangs off him like a wet towel, fills your lungs deep and heavy.
“you want tea? peppermint?”
you nod, ignoring the fact that he already knows your usual.
you moved in just two weeks ago—your previous housing plans fell through, and lo and behold, your brother’s best friend happened to have a spare bedroom.
unfortunately, your brother’s best friend also happens to be the guy you’ve had a crush on for approximately three years and two months, not counting the time you went to college and reminded yourself that other men do, in fact, exist.
now he’s big and tall and is a history grad student, and you actually considered splitting taeyong’s closet-sized studio with him instead of living in your own personal hell.
worse, it’s the fifth time this week that you’ve had these multi hour past-midnight conversations. yesterday it was wheat thins and existentialism, and the day before it was the ethics of the angry birds movie. you hate that he’s smart because it makes him that much hotter.
“you should really fix that sleep schedule of yours,” he says in that very doyoung way of his, pretty lips pursed with concern.
he hands you a mug, one that you very deftly note is one of his, even though you have plenty of your own. this is the kind of thing you read into when you have the most gut-wrenchingly stupid thing for a guy you will never pull.
“as if you have a better one.” you pick up the fat book he’s left on the counter—the history of the decline and fall of the roman empire—and admire the neat walls of post-its lining the pages. “what are you doing up?”
doyoung settles next to you, leaned up against the counter looking like some hot librarian with his specs, and you hand him the book with a weak hand.
your shoulders touch, and you notice he smells like pine.
“studying,” he admits. he takes a sip from his own mug (earl gray because it’s caffeinated). “and then i wondered if i would find you out here again, going through the cabinets like some kind of raccoon.”
he puts the book down, and you have the feeling that it is not a studying kind of night.
“it’s not my fault i don’t understand the weird marie kondo way you organized your pantry. who the hell puts the cereal in the bottom cabinet,” you tease, finding that you love the way his mouth folds up when he gets embarrassed.
“it’s a work in progress.”
he smiles and then you smile and then you look down at your cup and watch the little tea bag bob up and down because you can’t bear to make eye contact for another second.
“i—,” doyoung starts, clearly trying to find words, anything to say.
you turn to face him once more, choosing to not perceive the fact that he’s looking at you, that he’s been looking at you, almost like he can see through the big, linty sweatshirt you have on.
his eyes draw you in; it’s a cruelly magnetic force that pulls you to him until you’re toe to toe and you can swear your heartbeat is so fast and hard that you can feel it in the air.
it’s that same force that washes over you, fills you with a boldness unknown to you. and you do what the you of years ago couldn’t dare to do—you bring your lips to those perfect ones of his, and you kiss him.
his body tenses against yours, and you’re now confident that you’ve supremely fucked up. but then he places his mug on the counter and pulls back, only to kiss you again, slow and romantic, like he means it.
“thank god,” he says, half whisper because you’re still on him, and you’re glad it’s dark because you are most likely the color of a ripe tomato.
“i—i didn’t know,” you manage to squeak out, so close to him you can see your reflection in his glasses. you can’t help but look back down at his lips, so unfairly soft and inviting, and how they’re now glossy with you. “i wasn’t sure.”
“neither did i,” he laughs, and it’s almost like you can see the dignity flood back into his body, because he then follows it with, “i should’ve asked you on a date first, huh? or at least—”
“please shut up and kiss me again.”
he does.
#this is for you doyoung anon#sorry this is like so long and rambly and nothing happens#anyway. 🧍#mine#doyoung#nct#doyoung x reader
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sometimes i think i wasnt an injury-prone child and then i realise im gaslighting myself
tw: fair descriptions of injury?? if you dont like blood uhh dont read <3 this is just me reminiscing on being a child who thinks they cannot feel. pain. sorry if its incoherent im very sick and life feels like a fever dream and i did not sleep last night! this is so diary-entry-core TLDR i had a lot of random injuries and a few medical mysteries.
i keep looking at the middle of my chest like "man where the fuck did i get this scar from" and then i remember this one childhood day where i was filled with hubris and slid down a chain in a playground and my skin tore from under my shirt and i started bleeding terribly ill also occasionally look at the permanent callouses on my hands and remember running down a hill at full speed, followed by rolling down a hill at full speed, crashing into rocky concrete, looking down at my hands and being utterly terrified because they're entirely covered in blood???? its all red??????? also spinning on the biggest rock in the rock garden in front of my house after a friend's birthday party blowing bubbles when i lose my footing and land chin-first into the sharpest rock there, getting blood all over my favourite party dress and having to go to the ER for 6 hours and getting, not stitches, but glue. yeowie. i scratched most of the scar off somehow, just tearing the skin off my face because i didnt like the texture. its still kind of there if you look at the right angle. being in gymnastics class, doing beat swings on the high bars, thinking "whey my hands hurt im gonna drop and get some chalk (for some reason. its not like i was slipping i was just yeowch)", dropping down, looking at my hands and LO AND BEHOLD three inches of the skin beneath my ring finger on both hands is sticking up stupid vertical ! i couldnt use my hands too good for the next two weeks, also the skin sticking up WAS NOT DEAD so i couldnt trim it without feeling excruciating pain. like cutting your ear off :( not really a "when i was younger" thing, still valid now, but i have hyper mobility so im stupid flexible. especially in my ankles! like i cant do sports without wearing ankle braces on both legs. even that cannot save me sometimes, i still die. anyway my mum thought i was a piece of shit and was faking my ankle injuries bc the limping would last like. a whole month wowie! then we realised i just have bad joint. also i can hit the splits anywhere without stretching, i can walk on the literal sides of my ankles (not like. the sides of my feet no no no. go even further beyond.), i can fold my fingers backwards into silly lookin curls without any pain and keep them there no issue, and i have gotten many MANY greenstick fractures even after my bones developed a lot because my bones soft and refuse to break like a normal persons. like my basketball coach will bend my leg back to test how far it goes and i wont feel any pain and he'll say like. "oh thats waaaay too far back to be safe." and ill laugh because it can go WAY further back! and i hate it !
BONUS: ME BEING A MEDICAL MYSTERY WOOOOO up to age 8 i would have these ... seizures? all throughout the night. i would shake super aggressively and it wouldnt wake me up. my mum filmed it one night when she finally caught it on video (she would stay up HOURS ON END trying to catch it. wild). the shaking would start like a twitching at my fingers and would travel to my hand, to my arm, to the rest of my body and youd think i got fucking electrocuted. anyway she showed it to doctors and they brought me in immediately to scan my brain for fuck knows what and they didnt. find anything? like my brain activity was completely normal. they didnt let me out of hopital for a week cus theyre like "THIS ISNT NORMAL SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH THIS KID" but. womp womp. we never found out. i dont shake anymore but i do shmove a lot. like, a lot a lot. and im always tired and im capable of falling asleep standing up. and have minor chronic fatigue. also i had a bullseye-type thingy on my thigh that really, REALLY looked like a tick bite! i was in immense amounts of pain and couldnt properly walk. there was a dot in the middle, and this surrounding ring of red would expand and shrink overtime. very reasonable to think of it as a tick bite. anyway my parents carried me out to the car in the middle of the night so we could go to sick kids. they measured how much the ring would expand by (i dont remeber number. it was beeg.) and then they sent me to the ER out of the concern that i would get lyme disease. they tested me or something idk i was unconcious and. IT WASNT A TICK BITE! you may be asking "so what was it, mr gorgeous fish?" um. well heres why this is in the 'medical mystery' section. they never found out. it went away a day later and we were just like "ah. okay." so. whoops. when i was a toddler they put me in an mri thing where they uh. strapped me down because toddlers usually freak out and damage the mri thingy? anyway. was in there for two hours. and i did not freak out. at all. i was asleep for one of the hours, but the second one i just laid there very awake and very still and the doctors thought i had brain. damage. i didnt! yay ! i also have many chronic illness now. weeeee i probably missed a lot of my stories here but anyway. heres me being silly
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(Long Post)
Hopefully all of you had a wonderful year 2023 - successful, joyous, and healthy. While we wish each other 'HNY' on January 1st, a few of us while responding to the wishes, also reflect and think of the year gone by and, in the hindsight, pray that they don’t go through the bumpy patches again.
Thirteen days down the line while a cold wave sweeps the city and a grey sky adds to the gloom, I suppose it is time to look back at the year 2023 while tucked in a warm duvet with a cup of hot coffee or a glass of rum in hand.
But then going back is not easy unless one has maintained a meticulous account, a diary of sorts. It is difficult to recall all events - so before I began writing this I put down a broad selection of month wise events after which it was easier to sum it up.
The year 2023 was tiring and tough, though equally rewarding. At times trying and testing, at the others back breaking and on a few occasions frustrating to downright unpassable. Yet, the time-hardened bones, the stubbornness not to back down, to take it all upfront - not just face it but challenge it too - sailed me through. I can now say with a grin that both the clock and the time looked back and smiled. That reward was bigger than the financial one.
Till about the second week of March 2023 things were sailing smooth at work and home. Towards the last week we went to Bhopal to mount the exhibition ‘Hum Sab Sahmat: Resisting a Nation without Citizens’ (‘We All Agree’ - a testament to resisting a nation being shaped without its citizens). That’s where we got the news that two of our friends had been hospitalised. We rushed back only to see both of them pass away in a matter of three days. Comrade Suneet Chopra was first one to leave us and dear dear friend Vivan Sundaram followed on 29 March 2023. It was a huge setback.
Back at work picking up the threads I was debating the existential crisis that the death of a dear one leaves one with. Though a little hard to push, yet the wheel of life carries on gently patting the past.
Somehow I have always found that the Financial Year has a kind of continuity with the calendar year. As one settles in the comfort zone of a benign April suddenly challenges pounce on you from a hidden corner. Till then I was pretty much enjoying whatever came my way and what I was doing, professionally or on a personal level. I was more than happy with last years' financials and with the healthy number of projects in our hand. Come May, the first unseasonal rain and a burst of seepage from the second floor terrace of our home brought with it an unending spate of problems at home which was also doubling up as part-office. Lo and behold, a civil works contractor and a melee of labour took over our place in an army-like operation disrupting everything for the next three months.
Between the work supervision and rounds to the market I could barely attend to work. On the professional front work suffered, deadlines overshot, clients screamed, and expenses piled. How can one even pretend to be creative and churn out campaigns or designs that satisfy the soul while one is tumbling over sacks of cement and slipping over stone dust, how? Most unhappy with myself and the team I was losing my shirt on everyone around which made matters worse. Fortunately, I got a grip on myself in time and calmed down before things went out of hand. The pressure of office work was increasing so did the delays at home caused by absentee workmen.
On June 1st bad news came from Dubai. My life-time mentor and guide Zamir Ansari passed away after a massive heart attack. I was devastated. We had a long association of nearly 35 years. He was the most gentle, the kindest and a god-like being who helped anyone with everything he had. While his loss jolted me no end, at a memorial meeting for Mr Ansari something good came up. I shook hands with two people with whom a misunderstanding had cropped up a few years back. In my heart I felt much lighter having cleansed my heart and having made-up with them. There is so much good in the world to see, feel, share, and give. Life trudged.
Home renovation is an unending pain. Once you start fixing seepage, masonry creeps in together with water-proofing; plumbing replacement brings down functional bathrooms which need to be redone from the scratch. Electricals and woodwork soon follow which necessitates paint work and floor polishing, if not entire floor replacement. The whole house was in a mess. It was physically and mentally draining running up and down the three levels at the peak of summers. With the dust and noise all around us Ma fell ill and then all of us followed one after another, flu, sore throats, congestion and the viral fever kept us down. A nagging threat of corona persisted with unmasked labour sauntering around the house for ten hours each day. With tea and snacks to be served twice a day to a team of thirty odd workers, the household help and the kitchen was operating more like a free-canteen about to collapse any day.
In between the saving grace was a decent exhibition design and execution project that came our way. Normally of short duration but hectic, exhibition projects are well paying, we made a packet for a week of sleepless nights.
While all this was happening I managed to hurt my knee and limped my way through latching on to stair railings and walls. Over weeks it came to a point that I couldn't attend to work or even go for my morning walks. The orthopaedic said that I had a bone abrasion and had torn knee-joint ligaments. A busy work season had begun. With September came the festival rush of north India. Visits to the doctor and the physiotherapist were added to the hectic work schedule. Work pressure continued without respite (good it did).
We hadn't had a break for over seven months. Not even a decent and calm Sunday. Catching a drink in peace seemed luxury. No friends, no party, no outings. Life was dull and boring only dealing with masons, plumbers, carpenters, painters, welders, electricians and floor polishers. Finally, and somehow having pushed everyone out, we managed to get the house back in shape and sing with us sometime in October. It was such a relief.
While we were enjoying our wine and cheese and the music played in the background a hearty duet joined the chorus. My brother and his wife, from pardes, joined us in the freshly redone space. Warmth filled the place. From then onwards it was a party each morning, noon, and night. Evenings were only for drinks which drowned us. World Cup Cricket was here - the fever gripped us too. Succumbing to the loot by the black marketeers we headed to the Private Gallery view of matches in Chennai and Ahmedabad. The on-ground cricket entertainment is a different game. It is heady when you know that the rest of the universe is watching the game 17 seconds after you.
Bad news somehow smells of the relative peace and joy one is enjoying. This time it came from Palestine. Innocent Gazans have had to suffer unending brutalities at the hands of Israeli forces for over three months now.
Clients were kind during the next two months. No one was dying or flying. No one asked for a brochure at the last minute. No press conference wanted a PR push, no Annual Reports were delayed. All in all work sailed smoothly. There were more holiday breaks and parties than work during this time. Festivals, together with a spate of birthdays, meant celebrations. Fun and frolic carried on with heritage walks, concerts, visits to monuments and museums, excesses of street food topped with heady overdose of drinks.
Finally, as all good things end, so do parties and celebrations. Work pressure increased together with the knee pain. Brother and bhabhi went back home. Life was coming back to the drudgery of a routine when the happy bells rang.
A new, prestigious, and fairly large exhibition project came our way. This one was to happen in Shahjahanabad - inside the great monument built by Emperor Shah Jahan. I fell in love with the Red Fort all over again as we had the special permission to drive our car straight inside the Fort through the historical Delhi Darwaza with its life-size elephant statues guarding the magnificent edifice and its age-old secrets. Despite the limp and the pain it was a joy to work inside the 17th Century fort. Even in the peace and quiet of Diwan-i-khas I could hear the nautch girls sing and dance.
The commute from Gurgaon to purani Delhi was a dampener but it also had the bait of 'Delhi 6 ka khaana'. The near 5,000 sq feet of our exhibition space finally turned out as a stunning art gallery overlooking the Mughal grandeur spread around us. Decked with priceless artworks from across the country the hall looked like a haseen dulhan. The design and the display was appreciated and applauded. In our hearts we were more than happy for having done a bloody-good job.
The successful completion of a project has to be celebrated, so, leaving the foggy and cold Delhi behind, off we went to the balmy and sunny coastal Kerala. The year was coming to an end and we knew that one has to reward oneself for the accompanishment/s and all the hard work. Driving along the south-western coast we rode further down south from historic Kochi to the backwaters of Alleppey to Trivandrum and to the blue-water and white-sand beaches of Kovalam enjoying fish fillets and toddy - all the way through watching Bharatanatyam and Mohiniyattam performances while admiring the pollution free sparkling blue skies. While in Kovalam as I watched the sun set behind the Arabian sea two clients called to say that their "Calendar designs" were delayed. What???? Didn’t you get an auto reply saying I am out of town? Ugghhhh!!!
I wondered, could I complain to the sun why was it setting, could I? A fishing boat crossed the pale orange sphere as it dipped in blue waters. A flock of birds were circling the boat waiting for the catch. A few stars peeped out from the dark northern sky. I poured a drink.
Designers and artists can't complain even when their dreams are broken.
To sum up, the year 2023 indeed was tough yet it was rewarding in more ways than one. Hoping that 2024 will be kind and joyous for all of us, personally I look forward to more vacations, explorations, more journeys and more laid back weeks over work, work and work. Cheers to all of you. Stay safe and stay in love.
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AVCon Day 1 2023 Report
I had the opportunity to go to AVCon this year, a convention in Adelaide that made its return this year! It was my first ever anime convention, and it was a whole load of fun!
I went with Pie @piedivide, a good friend of mine! He cosplayed 9S, you’ll see him throughout the report hehe ^^
The report is under the cut!
Since I was going to a convention, I thought I should cosplay! When else would I have the chance to after all?
There were so many characters I wanted to cosplay, but at the end I chose…..
Bocchi-Chan from Bocchi The Rock!
Here is my beautiful pose I did because I couldn’t think of any other pose lol
Her wig was an absolute nightmare though, it was always so tangled even when I brushed it out, I’m definitely going for a character with shorter hair next time.
Exhibit A:
See that mess lol
But regardless, let’s actually get into it!
Pre-Con
I got my butt up at 6am in order to get ready, since I wanted to get to the convention around 10am (spoiler alert I did not manage to get there by 10am).
I tied my hair back here because I was worried about sitting on the wig and pulling it off, but honestly I probably didn’t need to lol
Since the convention is in the city, I had to catch the train.
In full cosplay.
It didn’t help I forgot the timetables change on the weekends so I had to wait like 30 minutes at the station for the train to come with my mum lol
People were staring which was understandable, I was Bocchi after all with her bright pink hair and colourful costume lol
Lucky for me, there was a Yuyuka cosplayer and a few others also in cosplay so I felt less embarrassed.
The Yuyuka cosplayer actually sat behind me on the train!
Once I got to the station, I went straight to the bathroom to brush out my wig because it was a hot mess.
Still was a hot mess here actually lol
Con Time!
I met with Pie after my attempts of fixing the wig and we headed to the convention! So we got there like after 11am!
There was a okay line and we waited, and of course me being me, instantly started freaking out about all the cosplayers and pointing out who was who lol
Like right when we got to the line, I saw a Kagamine Rin cosplayer and I freaked out lol
There was a very pretty Mona too and I freaked out again lol
I did a lot of freaking out okay. That’s just how I am. You can’t expect me to stay calm at an anime convention! That’s like…impossible.
We were holding our phones with the QR code for our tickets and it was hard to believe we were here.
Pie and I sort of spontaneously decided to go like 8 months ago and I never thought the day would finally come. As we got closer and closer, it became more and more real.
Once we got in, we got our passes and we headed straight into the food hall (only because we had no idea where was what and we couldn’t be bothered getting out the map so it was a fun adventure lol).
I'm so glad we got passes! I thought we would get the paper tag but no! Real passes! Felt so cool!
Continuing straight, we arrived into the Video Games Hall, which had a giant stage and a lot of laptops! And right on the side was….handhelds?!
Whole bunch of games and consoles for sale, ranging from the N64 to the Wii! PlayStation 1! 3DS! DS! I was surprised, I didn’t think that I’d see any Wii games at the convention.
My hard drive I use with my Wii actually stopped working so I’ve been buying physicals of the games I really like ;;
And lo and behold, they had Mario Kart Wii. The one game I’ve been looking for since like….2021? Now I can play CTGP and mods!!
Instantly bought it along with Wii Sports Resort because I love Wii Sports Resort. Been wanting to play it.
And it was right there and I couldn’t resist okay
Already managed to spend money and I just got there lmao
It is what it is.
Anyway, we continued through the hall, admiring all the games. It was just all so cool! I saw Street Fighter 6 and went :O
There was also a giant Game and Watch System!
I was mostly in awe the whole time. I also continued my freaking out lol
Then we exited to the Artist Alley. The holy grail of art. There were over 90 artists there.
Hoo boy I dropped money here lmao
We beelined to Kamaniki’s booth (I freaked when I saw their name on the map lol), but also taking the time to walk and see all the art! Everyone is so talented, it’s incredible!
We found Kamaniki’s booth and we each bought two prints. I got Pyra and a Bocchi the Rock one!
Pie and I decided that we had to buy a print with our respective characters on it, and we did! Pie got a Nier Automata one that had 9S on it.
We then continued our trek, and then I bought more prints because I couldn't resist lol
We then went to the Exhibition Hall which was full of anime merch! There were stalls everywhere.
We saw Callie and Marie plushies and guess what we did….
We bought them instantly lol
I got Callie and Pie got Marie!
Then we walked around some more and oh my god they had Hololive gacha. Volume 4 and 5. I made this screech and Pie laughed his head off lmao
I love Hololive okay
I thought we needed coins for it (which I did not have) but we had to buy tokens (which I could with the power of my card). I bought two rolls and did each Hololive gacha!
I tried to predict who I would get but I was very wrong haha, but I didn’t mind who I got. I like everyone in Hololive!
I got Lui and Marine! Love them so much.
Pie did a Spy X Family one and a Hololive one too. He actually nearly did the wrong gacha until I yelled at him not to lol (you’re welcome Pie lol).
I saw a stall that was operated by my Uni (they’re a sponsor) and it made me think about the fact I had Uni the next week ;;
Then we walked around some more! It was so cool seeing so much merch in one place! Had to resist buying stuff, I already spent quite a bit at this point aha
After we decided to go get some food because we were hungry.
We wanted to try Takoyaki but they ran out, all they had left was Karaage Chicken. It was really good!
We had to wait for like…20 minutes for it which was fun. I was 47th and they only announced like...30…..
Us waiting lol
Someone actually came up to me asking for a photo during that time and I was really happy!
Never thought I’d get asked for any photos honestly. It made me so happy! Pie got asked for photos too, it was so cool!
Actually someone came up to Pie and said “Hey I really like your 2B costume!” which was really hilarious lmao
Of course Pie was kind and stuff and said thank you but still lol
And Pie also asked for photos as well!
Love the poses here hehe
I had the bright idea to torture myself by using chopsticks. I know how to use them, but I’m absolutely crap at using them.
I also had a fork so I could give up at any time. Like halfway through, I decided to just use my fork. I reached out to grab it, thinking I would be saving myself all the struggle.
But tragedy struck.
I DROPPED THE FORK ON THE GROUND 😭
I was forced to use the chopsticks the whole time and Pie just watched me suffer
I’m a chopsticks failure……
After I finally finished, we went to get some photos together! For this occasion, I bought a tripod! It came in handy!
We took a lot of photos!
Some of the ones I like (I would put them all but no space sadly, Tumblr limit ;;)
My eyes also decided to kill themselves half way through and I had to retreat to the bathroom. I looked like I was crying when I wasn’t ;;
My eyes like to do this thing where if something irritates it, it starts tearing up immediately. It’s very fun (T_T)
I think it was after this, I saw a Mizuki from Arknights cosplayer. Didn’t expect to see Mizuki here but I freaked out of course lol
I love Mizuki.
And I really wanted a photo. But I was too shy to ask.
So Pie did for me (thank you Pieeeee)
ME AND MIZUKI AAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaa
Namie-mama I did it!! They were so kind!
Then we just walked around for the rest of the con pretty much, though all the halls. Bought some more prints and simply enjoyed our time!
When it was nearly the end of the con, we decided to buy each other one print that the other would like. We split off, and I went bounding down the left side of the Artist Alley.
I didn't even go that far when I saw the perfect print. It was a beautiful BOTW print with Link riding a horse. It screamed Pie so I bought it immediately.
The artist even offered another print for another $10 but I declined because we were only meant to get one print for each other.
So I sat and waited at the area we agreed to meet at since I already found the perfect print quicker than I anticipated.
Picture I took while waiting.
More people asked me for photos actually to my surprise, there was this little kid who wanted a photo with me and it was so adorable. Made my heart warm hehe ( ◠‿◠ )
Like so! I heard "Bocchi" from behind me and I'm like "Huh??" “That’s me!”
I honestly wished I got more pictures with cosplayers, I was too shy to ask like anyone lol, next time I really want to ask people! Got to be more confident!
But I did admire them from afar! Staring a bit creepily but that’s definitely what Bocchi would do lol
There were these Genshin cosplayers that looked amazing, especially this Yaoyao and this Arlecchino and Columbina!!
And I saw Mew Ichigo too!! Apparently they made their cosplay themselves which is sick.
I didn’t take that many pictures of the convention itself, since I was mostly just experiencing everything, taking it all in. Next time I want to take more!
And make a vlog too!
Definitely want to go to another convention again! And spend way too much money (I refuse to look at my bank account, I don't want to know how much I spent lol).
Thanks for reading my report! ^^
Bocchi is having a crisis
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Gasp if this is too personal you can ignore me but you're in a relationship? What kind, who, when, how, are they as wonderful as you also do you have any cool stories about them or a past relationship omigosh spill.
its funny, because me and my partner literally have a whole backstory and i am about to unleash it upon you
Let me tell you The Story Of Space Potato
a long, long time ago, i was seven years old, and taking swim lessons at my local YMCA. in my class, was a kid who we'll call Kase (the german word for cheese) Kase and i were like every other seven year old who was put in a close vicinity with another their age, and quickly became friends.
while we took these brief YMCA swim lessons, the two of us played a game we dubbed "Space Potato" which is where you stand in the shallow end, jump up, curl into a ball and bob around like a, well, potato.
that swim practice session ended, and just like you do with all other playground friends, i completely forgot about Kase's existence.
flash forward a few years later and i graduated from YMCA swim lessons onto an actual swim team. now, this was funny because my mother was extremely excited to tell me that Kase's younger sibling, Krankenhaus, was on the swim team as well.
i remember my mother said to me, "do you remember Krankenhaus? they did swim lessons at the YMCA with you!" and so forth.
i had quite literally never heard of Krankenhaus before in my life.
however, when i came to practice on the first day, i was in a lane (lane 2) with several people, one of which was my classmate. we all got along fairly well, being fourth grade females.
one of the children in my lane introduced themselves to me as Kase. we werent the closest in our lane, but we were what the children nowadays refer to as "homies"
a good few practices in, and one day i say to Kase, "hey, want me to show you this thing i came up with called space potato?"
Kase's reaction was something like "broh i made that up" and suddenly we remembered the swim lessons at the YMCA.
the year progressed, and Kase and i were slightly closer than before, but not really at "close friend" level. we would talk during practice, and at meets, but it never really meant anything.
quite some time later (like a lot of years) and it was the end of the swim season, and Kase asked for my number. this is a normal thing to do, as we were friends and wanted to communicate.
i remember literally one of the first texts Kase send me was a gif of Pink Fluffy Unicorns Dancing On Rainbows, which really got us off on the right foot.
swim years came and went, and i was trying to figure out what my next school would be, as i had graduated. Kase was going to go to a school their mother worked at, and told me that i should apply.
i applied to Kase's school, got in, and chose it over my other two options, a horse girl school and a bunch of barns.
now the summer before i would go to this new school, i was at a theater camp doing stage tech and set design, it was a week long camp and i remember distinctly that on tuesday night, me and Kase were texting, as people do.
now i had been questioning my feelings for about a month now, because i was unfamiliar with the special condition known as Not Straight that i was dealing with.
on this tuesday night, we were chatting about random things. the two if us have a lot in common, we had read the same books, liked to draw, so on. and in a moment of idiocy, i texted something sort of like "brooo are we like soulmates?"
and then immediately regretted it because like actually who says that
but this moment of panic grew to extremes when i got no reply. i stared at my phone screen, not even the three dots showed up. i actually almost cried.
turning my phone off, i pulled a blanket over my head to wallow in my own self pity. desperate, i opened my messages and lo and behold, there were several texts, the last few being things like "where did you go?" and "did you like die or something"
turns out my FUCKING PHONE didnt send the messages through at the most horrible moment possible.
the funny thing is, the conversation turned from being best friends roommates (oof) to us spamming the word "mooses"
we also signed a soulmates contract.
however, this is not the actual story of how we got together. i might write a part two later, but my fingers are tired of typing
To Be Continued
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Olivia Rodrigo Album Review: GUTS
(Geffen)
BY JORDAN MAINZER
Olivia Rodrigo had wanted to title her second album "GUTS" since she was making her debut, SOUR, because she was interested in the various colloquial contexts in which we use the word. No, you're not going to find the singer-songwriter's second album on the shelf next to Exhumed's back catalog--referring to entrails is about the only meaning Rodrigo doesn't conjure from the word. She mentions "spill your guts," and the album certainly has the same diaristic quality as her first record. She also brings up the phrase "hate your guts;" lo and behold, at times on GUTS, Rodrigo foregoes the sarcasm and facetiousness of SOUR for full-on diatribes and revenge fantasies. But the connotation that stands out most to me, listening to the record for months after it's now come out, is one of courage. Simply, it takes a lot of guts to make an album like this.
From the start, Rodrigo sets up the unrealistic expectations she's under, physical and behavioral, both as a young woman and as a celebrity. On the Joan Didion-inspired, dynamic and choral "all-american bitch", she sings "I'm grateful all the time / I'm sexy, and I'm kind / I'm pretty when I cry," fully aware that she's encapsulating a caricature more than a real character. Appropriately, she spends the rest of the album contradicting the idea of the ideal feminine. Knowingly regretful, she hooks up with an ex on the stuttering power pop jam "bad idea right?" She's jealous of a "dazzling starlet, Bardot reincarnate" on the layered and ghostly "lacy", her vocals and producer Dan Nigro's synthesizer skyward before they come crashing to a painful, realized whisper. On piano and strings ballad "the grudge", she posits that while "It takes strength to forgive...I don't feel strong." Rodrigo swims in imperfection.
Rodrigo's deep dive into her own humanity, though, sets her up for longer lasting strength. For every lambast of "bloodsucker" and "fame fucker," iconic as they are, there's a line like on "logical" where she sings, "I know I'm half responsible / And that makes me feel horrible." Synth rock standout "love is embarrassing" is especially impressive, as Rodrigo collates all the cringiest things she's ever done--the type that would keep most people up at night--and turns them into a singular anthem of teenage awkwardness. On "making the bed", she realizes that as much as she's resentful of certain aspects of her life, from the toxicity of the music industry to her penchant for social errors due to homeschooling, she has the ultimate agency to change things. She's stated the song was the hardest on the album to write, and the delicate balance between blame and acceptance is palpable. There are even multiple layers to "get him back!" Sure, Rodrigo wants "to meet his mom and tell her her son sucks," but she also wants to reconnect. Otherwise, why would she care?
Ultimately, GUTS has proved to be one of the most rewarding pop records of the year due to its sheer humanism. You can find solidarity in a song like "pretty isn't pretty", a shimmering dream pop standout instrumentally wedged between "1979" and Alvvays, one that decries the extent to which capitalism promotes unrealistic standards, beauty or otherwise. But it's closer "teenage dream" that ensures the album ends not on a bang, but on a relatable wince. Small moments, like the pseudo "you're not from around here" record scratch after the first chorus, build up the unease to emphasize Rodrigo's final moment of self doubt: "They say it gets better / But what if I don't?" Kudos to Rodrigo for putting to words and music what we're all thinking all the time.
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