#AND IF WE HAVE CHAPTERS WHO HAVE TIME TO PAINT AND SCULPT.

[a-gay-little-cat]

what always makes me laugh when i read the horus heresy books so far (as well as previous blingels books) is when space marines interact with human characters, especially female ones

the writers endless need to point out how pretty and attractive they are but firmly putting their foot down and pointing out that at least an adeptus astartes would have to assume so for he is beyond such trivial things and must always think towards war

yet they also love pointing out how handsome fellow marines would be if not for their conversion to an astartes, though even with that they are describe handsome at time

[otrtbs]

Hi I hope you're doing well 🌷

I had a question. I'm totally asking out of pure curiosity, it's not a criticism or anything of the sort.

In ahb (this masterpiece of yours) Sirius's favorite painting is Degas' Dancers.

I wanted to know if you knew the background of this painting and if making it Sirius' favorite was a deliberate choice or if you had no idea at all.

Because the Ballerinas in Opera Garnier in Paris were all really young and mostly, they were poor. The dancers were often their family's hope to crawl out of misery.

The audience was full of men.

In fact, the sad flip side was that there was a whole prostitution network behind the scene. With these young girls. Men could pay for backstage access to watch ballerinas change and sometimes rape them.

So Degas was a big customer.

That's how he painted the dancers and most of his works.

That's again how he sculpted the ballerina, her tutu was added meaning the 14 year old girl was posing nude.

Degas is also suspected of being Jack the Ripper, there are a certain number of credible leads and potential evidences.

That's why I was wondering if you knew.

Since there is this whole chapter where they insult Picasso (as they should) I found it strange that Degas being a known major p*do did not receive the same treatment.

Ps: I'm french, I don't know if I made any mistakes writing this, if I have please excuse me I tried my best 🙏

Okay hi, hello! I am doing well and I hope you are as well! You have unlocked Art Historian Thesis Nat, so I am going to put an extremely lengthy post under the cut, I'm so sorry (this is literally my area of study,,, i fear i am incapable of being brief about this)

I do want to clarify that right off the bat, I don't necessarily think many of these art historical figures are "good people". Like none of them are the best, most moral, upstanding citizens you should model your life after (but they're also dead sooooo). But I also understand that I did take some time in my fanfiction to make my hatred for Picasso very clear, and so I can also understand the confusion in not extending that same hatred towards Degas. But there are a few reasons for that, that I'll try to explain below!

The direct historical documentation of Pablo Picasso's violence towards the women in his life is vast and damning. If you want particularly good insight into his violence and abuse, then I recommend reading Marina Picasso's (Picasso's granddaughter) memoir titled: Picasso: My Grandfather. I also recommend Françoise Gilot's (romantic partner of Picasso) books, Life with Picasso and Picasso and Matisse. It is through the memories of the people who loved Picasso and who loved him in turn, that we hear of his sadistic nature that drove his lovers to suicide and we get personal letters that he wrote to Gilot in which he says things like "Dora, for me, was always a weeping woman… And it’s important, because women are suffering machines" and "For me there are only two kinds of women: goddesses and doormats." His granddaughter has this to say about him: “He submitted [women] to his animal sexuality, tamed them, bewitched them, ingested them, and crushed them onto his canvas. After he had spent many nights extracting their essence, once they were bled dry, he would dispose of them.” And Gilot says: "I am the only one to not have been sacrificed to the sacred monster(…) and is alive to tell the tale. He was a wonderful person to be with, it was like fireworks, amazingly creative, so intelligent and seductive(…) but he was also very cruel, sadistic and ruthless with others and with himself (…) It was the greatest love of my life, but you have to protect yourself (…) The others did not, they clung to the powerful minotaur and paid a very high price."

Why this matters: The evidence for Degas being so virulently misogynistic and cruel towards women is extremely less substantial and more speculative in nature.

Degas being Jack the Ripper. Degas being Jack the Ripper started off as a tiktok theory posed in early 2024, (though you can find an article as early as 2004 written by The Guardian's art critic here) and while fun to think about and speculate, it isn't true. August and September and November of 1888 is when the Jack the Ripper crimes were committed in London and Degas was in the South of France at that time receiving medical treatment because he was in extremely poor health. (Which you can find in The Letters of Edgar Degas edited by Theodore Reff (I'm sure there's. free PDF version out there somewhere)). Also, self-admittedly speculative, but Degas didn't visit the East-End of London when he did make his excursions to London because he was classist 😭. So, it would be odd for him to know the ins and outs of the streets where the murders took place. And also he had failing eyesight starting at 36, so the odds of him being Jack the Ripper are extremely slim.

The Ballerinas Yes, while it is true that the ballerina's were often subject to horrific conditions and were prostitutes for the "wealthy" patrons of the opera house, this does not mean that Degas partook in that. in fact, most historical documentation surmises he didn't. Degas considered himself a "realist" painter rather than an impressionist painter, wishing to document "real life" in all of its ugliness, beauty and unstylized truth. Therefore his primary concern was documenting the opera house and ballet in all of the moments, not just when the girls were dancing on stage. And in many of his paintings, Degas captures the opera patronsn in his ballerina paintings as lurkers behind the stage curtains as sinister black shadows, or as men predatorily watching in nice suits (e.g. Ballet, 1876 and The Rehearsal of the Ballet Onstage (1874)). But Degas himself, was NEVER a ballerina patron, he is even quoted as saying "People call me the painter of dancing girls. It has never occurred to them that my chief interest in dancers lies in rendering movement...". (now this is not because Degas was morally outraged at what was happening to the ballerina's, but because he viewed the men abusing the girls as committing a sin against God by sleeping with prostitutes). But while Degas had access to backstage, he was never a customer. And in fact, Degas is a notorious, well-documented celibate. This is because Degas believed sleeping with women would make him lose his special painting ability. No lie. Here's a direct quote from Vincent Van Gogh in his a letter to his brother Theo about the artist: "Degas lives like a little lawyer and does not like women, for he knows that if liked them and went to bed with them, he would become intellectually diseased and would no longer be able to paint." Degas was also known to reject ballerina's advances as well (again, fearing women would take away his magic painting power).

Feelings towards women By all accounts, Degas friends describe him as being reclusive towards women to being jovial with them, but always kind to them outside of a working environment. He even developed friendships with his fellow contemporary women painters. In a working environment, Degas was obsessed with perfection, demanding ballerinas contort their bodies in painful positions, and making them hold those positions for hours at a time. By all accounts, this was not because he hated them, but was obsessed with capturing their movements, the limitations of the human body, and he demanded perfection from himself. (x x x) (i.e. his obsession for his work and drive for perfection as a painter made him demanding and harsh towards his subjects, not his pure hatred of women).

Conclusions: So by many accounts, Degas was not particularly fond of women, and had little regard for his dancers. But the claims that he must have slept with the ballerina's and been a patron/customer "because that's what all men did back then" are not backed by any evidence. only evidence to the contrary. I went in on Picasso because those that were close to him have written first-hand accounts of his monstrocity. This is not the case with Degas. So, while I didn't tear him down like I did Picasso, I wasn't lauding him as a saint either. I highly recommend reading the article called Degas's Misogyny by Norma Broude which details the ways in which modern times have run away with this idea of Degas being a sadistic woman-hater and how we've gotten to this point. Anyway, TLDR; I was aware of the dark "underside" of the Paris Ballet at the time in which Degas was painting his works. Do I think he is Jack the Ripper and a man who participated in ballerina prostitution? No, not at all. At the end of the day, I am just an art history girl, telling anyone who will listen that there is not enough documentation on Degas to take these claims as 100% truth, or put that man up there with Picasso. Peace and Love! <3

[ottiliere]

i have to say, it has been a really long time since i have gotten as excited about a story as i have about the grief complex. seeing more of lynn and cam and the dynamic between the two of them made it impossible for me to read the new chapter at work without grinning like an idiot the whole time. ever since i first read part one, they have lived in my brain-- a testament to how well they're both portrayed, so much meaning in each drawing and sentence-- so much economy of characterization!!!! i'm in love with the way you draw facial expressions. so much emotion and subtlety..! i really liked cam's little conversation with the gas station attendant and seeing his more playful, childish side. i'm very interested to see what else will be revealed regarding the cause of the slow deterioration of the people around our two Noble Heroes. i also think the weird gross little animals are very cute and i hope to see more of them. also, while i don't want to be crass, especially about a story that's so-- i guess, delicately written, with such a light and skillful hand in regards to character dynamics, so please forgive me if this is over the line, but i really think that if cam kicked lynn in the stomach and put cigarettes out on him, ect. until he started age regressing or crying or something like that it would be a net positive for their relationship and would lead to healthier communication between the two of them; this is the only reason i want this to happen, of course. i'm already looking forward to the next chapter! thank you both for making beautiful art.

i'm glad people are enjoying the story, hearing this is always especially pleasant. i do not consider myself a "hater" in any capacity but i am chronically dissatisfied with a lot of the contemporary work i run into in my personal circles...my interests are a bit narrow to begin with, too, so it's kind of an issue. we want to make something good.

i think dane has done a reasonably okay job with the story so far and given the amount of compliments we have received on characterization/dialogue/etc., i'm considering reducing his beatings. he'd thank you for that, i'm sure.

cam's behavior in that scene was maybe meant to be a little meaner than playful, though. how often do you talk to people who act like the attendant was acting? there's something sad about it to me, i can never bring myself to make fun of someone to their face the way cam does.

i don't see anything weird or gross about my cute little animals, but thanks! you can expect to see a lot more of them in later chapters. the ones on display in this chapter were sculpted by dane, herbert, and baja, and painted by dane. we have a growing and very diverse catalogue of their little bodies.

while i respect the desire to remain uncrass, bear in mind that sometimes it's best not to tip your hand. i'm not even sure what crassness you're referring to here - plenty of people seem to want to see lynn hurt, for some reason. violence is rarely the answer...i don't think beating or getting beat on would inspire much desire for healthy communication between these two at all! but I'm sure cam would like it, for a little while. glad you're having fun, thanks for letting me know. we plan to keep at it.

[naminethewriter]

On the Road, Just the Two of Us

Chapter Eight: At Our Destination, Not Just the Two of Us

Masterpost | First | Previous | Ao3

Summary: This was written for @dukeceit-week-2024, @dukeceitweek

Janus and Remus are living in a campervan at the moment. Are they going somewhere? Who knows. The only thing that’s important is that they’re together.

Content Warnings: Flirting, Kissing, Bickering between the twins

🌻🌻🌻🌻

“I don’t want this to end,” Remus admitted quietly.

“I know, darling.” Janus didn’t look over at his boyfriend, too focused on the GPS that told him they were only five minutes away from their destination.

“Can’t we just drive past and keep going?”

“No, dear. It was fun and I loathe to admit I wouldn’t mind if this trip was longer, but we need to go back at some point. I can only take off time from work for so long and we do still need the money. Even if we were to live like this full time. I don’t think I’d enjoy it on a permanent basis, actually.”

Remus sighed, leaning heavily into his seat.

“Yeah, I know. Me too, actually. I can’t sculpt like this. Or paint on the scale I’d like. I know it’s for the best, but still… I don’t wanna deal with the responsibilities again.”

“I cannot relate to that at all.” Janus moved his hand to Remus’ thigh and squeezed. “It’s going to be fine. You focus on your art and let me deal with all the annoying paperwork and bills.”

“You’re gonna be busy again,” Remus accused, though it was in a lighter tone. He was indeed upset at that fact, but he also knew that it was necessary.

“Yes. That’s probably not going to change for a long while.”

“I know. It sucks ass.”

“It does.”

The GPS announced the last turn they would have to make before they’d reach their destination at the end of the road.

“We’ll find the time to do something like this again, promise,” Janus said. “Not every year, not even every other year but we’ll do it again.”

“I’ll cut you if we don’t.”

“Sounds fair.”

They drove the last stretch of their journey in silence, just enjoying each other’s company and reflecting on the past three month on their own.

It had been the most freeing time in Janus’ life.

He was going to miss it.

He pulled the van into a free parking spot outside a lovely, old hotel. The location of the wedding.

“Are you ready?” he asked Remus. His boyfriend huffed.

“One last thing.” Remus pulled Janus over to him, practically lifting him from the driver’s seat and onto his lap, before sealing their lips together. It was unusually sweet for him, no tongue involved.

They parted a few minutes later.

“Now I’m ready,” Remus grinned and Janus chuckled.

“Then let’s go.” He leaned over to grab the keys from the ignition before climbing out of Remus’ lap and out of the passenger door. Remus followed after him, but not without commenting on how good his butt looked.

“There you are! Finally!” The car door wasn’t even closed behind them before Roman was stalking over to them, looking close to furious. “Do you have any idea what time it is? You were supposed to be here yesterday!”

“What a nice welcome,” Janus commented dryly, causing Remus to burst out in giggles and Roman to glare at him.

“Sorry, Ro-bro, but we got turned around.”

“Oh, really?” Roman asked, obviously not convinced, his arms crossed.

“No, he saw a flyer for a carnival and begged me to go.”

“It was super fun, I almost puked on one of their rides! So worth it.”

“I cannot believe you two! A carnival, really?! The rehearsal dinner for your wedding is in two hours! Two hours! And you both look like you haven’t showered in a week!”

“Don’t be dramatic, it was only five days.” Roman groaned and Remus smiled at him, delighted by his annoyance.

“I do not know why you didn’t get a better van! One with a shower! Janus is a lawyer for goodness’ sake, you could’ve easily afforded it!”

“Yeah, but that wasn’t the aesthetic we were going for!”

“I am so going to strangle you!”

“Oh, look, the grooms finally made it,” a new voice commented, and Janus turned to see that Virgil, his best man, had joined them. “Roman was going up the walls since yesterday, it was hilarious to watch.”

“I can’t imagine that at all.” Janus smirked. “You seem quite calm though. Usually you would be right there with him, worrying your pretty little head off about everything.” Virgil elbowed him in the arm for that and rolled his eyes.

“Why would I stress myself out about your wedding? You already paid for all of this, so it’s not like it would’ve been a loss for me if you didn’t end up showing. Plus, I know the two of you, of course nothing here would go to plan, especially since Roman did most of the planning. I was sure you’re going to turn up late, if just to spite him. Hell, I wouldn’t put it past you to have arrived here like two days ago and you’ve just stayed in the van ten minutes from here until you could be fashionably late. I’m more surprised you showed up for the rehearsal at all. Second plus, Logan’s been weirdly insistent that you’d be here around this time. I think Remus has been texting him updates.”

“Why should we put so much effort into a wedding Roman wanted more than us? We would have been fine with getting an officiant into our backyard during a barbeque. He insisted on something more ‘meaningful.’” Janus rolled his eyes and Virgil snickered.

“He and his high standards. Anyway, let’s get you inside and under a shower. You reek.”

“Why, thank you Virgil, for telling me that so politely.”

“Fuck off and just come along.”

They started off towards the hotel, closely followed by the twins that were still arguing.

“And what the hell was that text about sunflowers in the bouquet?” Roman huffed, still rather worked up. “You can’t expect me to change that on such short notice! And they would have clashed with the other colors, plus they stand for platonic affection, not romantic!”

“The fuck you mean ‘short notice?’ I asked you about that two and a half months ago!”

“Yes, way too late! I added some sunflowers to the decorations but not the bouquet.”

“Wow, thank you for your sacrifice.”

They continued to bicker like that the entire way. When they reached the entrance to the hotel, Virgil pulled the door open and held it for them all to pass. Janus let the twins go first, since Roman seemed about to explode if he didn’t get Remus ready immediately. Janus watched them disappear further into the building when Virgil lightly shoved his shoulder with his own.

“So, you ready to get married?” he asked.

Janus watched Remus laugh loudly and pulling his brother into a hug and he smiled.

“I was ready to marry him years ago.”

🌻🌻🌻🌻

This is the end of the story! Thank you all so much for reading, reblogging, tagging and commenting 💛💚

[vixnovacoda]

Doctor's Medicine || Chapter 11

Hannibal Lecter x Original Character

Word Count: ~2k

CW/TW: NSFW 18+, graphic, disturbing content, dissociation, canon-typical violence.

[Chapter 1][Chapter 2][Chapter 3][Chapter 4][Chapter 5][Chapter 6][Chapter 7][Chapter 8][Chapter 9][Chapter 10]

[ao3 version here]

They were barely through the second glass when Hannibal tried to change the topic from favourite wine flavours and European countrysides. He lowered the wine from his lips, holding it how a trained hand would. “We’ve yet to touch upon the subject of your parents,” he said abruptly. 

   “Or yours,” returned Emma with the clashing of her nails against her wine glass resounding loud against the vastness that was Hannibal’s living room and its gothic decadence. The whole place was decadent, an oasis in concrete, filth-filled Baltimore - there was no sensible way that being a psychiatrist paid for this all on its own. It was made clear then that she didn’t know him well at all. Just bits of him.

   He took his time drinking, body turned to face her as he sat upright and perfectly poised on the other end of the sofa. The whole time, he sipped while she gulped. Not once had he broken form like a careful man being a gentleman with nothing to give away. “You don’t like opening up, do you?” assumed Emma.

   Then it broke briefly. Hannibal looked away from her. She could barely see the look in his eye, but it was clear enough by how he chose to focus on the skulls of dead prey, their lives having been taken away from man to be used as decoration, that he was questioning something. Maybe letting her inside this room while he had still been awake. It wasn’t clear what exactly. It was never always clear with him. Hannibal Lecter, the man who chooses horse hooves for chair feet. The man who designed his living room to be a forest; his hunting grounds. A place meant for calmness or to take home a meal. But she knew she said something he wasn’t expecting.

   “Then in that, we share,” came to utter Hannibal unexpectedly.

   “I suppose,” responded her. “However, I just simply don’t like getting close to people.” She lingered on him as the open fire painted the contours of his face like it were some greco-roman sculpture. If his head wasn’t so attached to his body she’d donate it to sit amongst the greats at a museum. “… Not anymore.”

   “Am I not ‘people’?” asked Hannibal in his usual manner, in his usual way that had you giving more of yourself up to him than he ever would; charming. Hannibal’s words were a bait she openly ate from.

   “That’s what I’m trying to figure out.”

   His head slanted, ever curious. “And what is your assumption so far?”

   The details of his sculpted lines turned less blurred. “A hunter,” she answered, her hand grabbing the back of the sofa between them as her body shifted closer. “You wait. You watch with care. You stand in a world of prey and take the ones you need in search of something, maybe you enjoy it, maybe it brings you calm. Either way, you’re alone.”

   “I am?”

   “It’s hard to find someone willing to hunt alongside.”

   The firewood crackled in the silence where they were at a stand still. Embers broke and sparks flittered, seen reflected in the only clear thing of that man she called a hunter, his eyes. Deep, dark forces of nature. Flecks of red. So much red in them. So… familiar.

   A bathtub, marbled by blood spilling, pouring over under my knees. I sit in it. I stare. There’s the body, then me. Fingers dip like toes in water, testing the climate. Eyes float to the surface. Iris of blue turned a glaring red. I bend closer, and it almost bleeds into my own.

   A hunger.

   That’s what it was. She had seen it before back in that house she was supposed to call home. Years passed where she might have almost forgotten. But, how could she when he was right there in front of her to remind her. Hannibal had that same look in his eyes, she was sure, and not a reflection like Will. Just, similar. Which meant he was one of the only people that understood her and what she felt. He had to. He just—

   With a grip larger than her own, Hannibal coerced the half-empty glass from her teetering grasp before she could taint the expensive upholstery or the remnants of his stripped-down suit – in which the shirt (a couple buttons undone) and trousers remained – and there she remained without moving an inch. Any closer and their knees would be touching. Then, a buzzing, tingling. A warmth filled her cheeks. She couldn’t help herself, but what was she doing? She barely knew this man she labelled as a friend mere hours ago. 

   Embarrassment swallowed whatever feeling she had while reality came rearing its head in. “But, what do I know? Maybe I am just projecting,” Emma stammered and lurched herself back, resting her tiring body over what was her side of the furniture. “Or deflecting the original question. After all, there's a lot of revealing oneself in discussing parentage, no hiding from the truth where the pieces come together. Even when buried, it never dies.” Though she wished it did. Then none of this would ever have happened. No pain. No tragedy. No dead Alex.

   The alcohol made light work with her, festering in all the nooks and crannies of her body, and the unrest fashioned lead from her frame as she slumped with a heave, spine curving against the armrest. Emma never believed in spirits, but as her heart felt cold while the tips of her fingers and the fireplace burnt, she might have sworn it was Alex. But she would never be so cruel to leave Emma at odds and staring at where heaven laid between the clouds that was Hannibal's ceiling for an answer. It had been this way not too long ago in the spare bedroom Hannibal had provided. Wide-eyed and brain ticking, she had stared at that ceiling. Unable to sleep, Emma was the one to search for the bottom of a bottle and Hannibal the one who indulged her thirst by uncorking a vintage when he probably shouldn’t have. 

   “Why are we still awake?” questioned Emma. Why am I alive?

   Hannibal’s voice waded through the confused silence like an echo. “I think only you can answer that one.” Followed by the pour of more wine. Drop after drop.

   It wasn’t a difficult answer when there was pause and alcohol in the air and the warmth of another who was in reach. She knew, like she had never known before. “… Company,” admitted her with newfound lucidity being consciously aware could never give her. “The world sounds different when I’m with you.”

   “What does it sound like?”

   “Like… Like a symphony.”

   The sofa sighed under the shifting of his weight as she swore he moved closer. “Harmony. When the right notes mix with the right instruments under the direction of the conductor, it is a cacophony of delight that is profound to the senses,” assuaged Hannibal.

   Makes a part of you from deep inside feel as if you could finally breathe , added Emma mid-thought.

   “Everything in sync. Everything right.”

   “See, you understand.” Too drunk with enlightenment under her breath to care, Emma threw herself upright to the rhythm of a bounce and eureka. “You’re the only one who sees me. Is it so bad to want to understand why? To be curious as to what you have buried when you’ve already begun digging up mine? Tell me anything of your parents, then I shall tell you mine. Is that so hard?” pressed Emma as she leaned forward, hunching slightly like a blind beggar to assuage and bend his gaze from above as predators pretending to be as innocent as prey ought to often do. This was the time. She was sure. He’d finally give a little; a test to their bond. To their friendship. Or whatever it was that they had and pretending was friendship. Survival.

   He looked at her.

   She looked back.

   And there was that look again. That hunger . When was the last time either of them had consumed? Too long, but Emma’s hunger was stronger, enough to beat Hannibal by a mile. He sighed through seething teeth. Just this once. That’s all she needed. That’s all she’ll get. “It was snowing the last time I saw them. Our home was covered in thick layers of its pure colour that you could barely see the horizon at dawn. A guise of innocent ongoings, one might say, or the blessing of god,” divulged Hannibbal, straining, like he was slicing off a part of him and serving it up to her raw on a platter. The act softened her. It was the closest she had gotten to understanding him, and sure, he could have been lying to get her to divulge something deeply personal. But only God would do that and he wasn’t God. He was far better than Him.

   Emma swallowed the hardened lump of salt in her throat. “There was a storm when my mother was murdered. It flooded our moors like an ocean. No one could leave,” she confessed.

   “Did you think it a blessing?” he asked.

   “Did you?”

   They stared amidst a revealing quiet, their eyes piercing through reflections.

   “Death is no blessing. It is just death,” spoke Emma through dry lips, suddenly more thirsty than she’d ever been.

   Hannibal slid her lipstick-stained glass across the table.  “I find that it is an end and a beginning.”

   “That’s one way to think about it, certainly.” Nodded along Emma half-heartedly and took glass to mouth; rapid and fast. Anything to completely satiate herself to completion. It wasn’t often she had told someone about her mother and she did not like this strange feeling that came to occupy her because of it. This bitter bile stuck within her like a rot, like a shame. Her fist clenched the wine glass stem with ferociousness. “I prefer to just let death be death.”

   “My, you really are a persistent force in the face of a battle, Emma Darcy,” commented Hannibal, with his sliver of admiration seeming all too genuine.

   Suddenly smiling and all too proud, Emma said, “I get that a lot. People are often surprised to find how unwilling I am to lie down and play dead.” She raised her glass almost triumphantly as she pushed down the rising rot.

   “And nor should you be forced to be something you are not.” Peering past the lip of the glass, she could see the beginnings of a smug smile like he knew something she didn’t. But, no sooner than downing the wine glass’s remains did the red liquid wash away the sight and her vision blur around the corners with a swallow. Light-headed and weightless. Unaware and buzzing. She didn’t seek to stop. The alcohol numbed the pain of her chrysalis – the pain that followed her existence, the pain she had come to stop. The change that was the end of her. Though it was less of a change or evolution and more of a breaking free from an ill-fitted cage.

   “Emma, are you still there?” came the sound of Hannibal’s dulcet voice, distant and far off, ringing and echoing, come to pull her back to the surface.

   “Yes.” She tried to follow it. Dragging, squeezing. Rising, and rising, and, then, free. Blinking away an old layer of a blurred world and struggling to centre her body upright, she repeats herself with a newfound conviction. “Yes, I always have been.”

   With reality rearing back in, she could feel the palm of his hand on her forehead, the other on the small of her back, as the warmth of his body melding with the closeness of hers. The beginning of early daylight cracked into rays behind Hannibal’s head and seeped into the smile that flitted across his lips. This version of herself, the one that had been begging to be let out – the one that found an easy way through the cracks of drunkenness – owed its life to him, and she matched his delight with awe and thankfulness at her saviour.

[thechaotictheoryy]

Unravel | 11. Unfit To Be Your Lover

summary: What if you had chains around your heart but you were the one who put them there? If you took a look at Parker’s heart, you would see a nice beating heart but Parker felt there were heavy metal chains wrapped it. After years of a disconnected relationship with her parents and a hard break up with her boyfriend of four years, Parker Williams made her heart mentally chained. Declaring to never fall in love again but what happens when she meets a witty musician who is all about seeking love?

pairing: main character x Hongjoong ft. ex! Yeosang

genre: (18+ minors dni), romance, fluff, lots of angst, coming to age, college au, smut, strangers to lovers, self discovery

word count: 4,439

chapter warnings: Parker in her feelings, cussing, Soojin being a weird bitch (you can tell I clearly don't like her), overthinking

song rec for this chapter: Pluto by Xdinary Heroes

Two months later. 

Wednesday March 2nd, 2022. 

“Parker, throw me a roller,” my classmate Ethan said. 

“Your legs don’t work,” I teased. 

“You’re right next to the cabinets,” he said, pretending to chuck a palette at me. 

I stuck out my tongue and walked to the cabinet. I grabbed a roller and threw it to him, luckily he caught it even though my pass was terrible. The class was currently working on our competition pieces for the second round. Mr. Cook had gone to a department meeting and would be back before time for class was over.  Every spring, the art department has a contest for the top three painters and sculptors. Making in the top three was important because if you won second and third, your work would be placed in the school gallery for six months in the school gallery but first place, your work would be placed in the LAMC for six months then moved to The Metropolitan Museum Art in NYC for another six months. I won second place last year but only made it in the top six my freshmen year.. I wanted to be number one this year. 

This year I was heading a different route, this would be my first year doing sculpting. Of course, I have taken two courses on it so far and did a little amateur piece but this would be my first big sculpture that I make myself. I was a bit nervous but the nervousness made my drive to do amazing better. Sarah offered to partner up for it because sculpting was her strength but I wanted to do this on my own. The first round, I made a small sculpture of a bird holding a hand in his mouth with a crushed heart. I made it into the top fifteen. This round they were cutting it down to six people. I had to make this sculpture for round two much bigger and better. I also have a midterm painting that was due at the end of the semester which I was in class for now. I wasn’t bothered by having a lot on my plate because it was like this the past two springs that I've been here. 

“Knock knock,” we heard someone say. 

I saw Joong and smiled a little. He smiled back and held up a bag, while walking my way. 

“Chicken burrito with extra salsa in the bag” 

“I hope you aren’t late to class,” I took the bag and raised my eyebrow at him.  

“Later,” he laughed and walked out the room, closing the door.

“Ohh, Parker got a boyfriend,” Mark teased. 

“Just a friend,” I took the burrito out the bag and took a bite out of it.

“Yeah yeah,” Sarah stuck her tongue out. 

I rolled my eyes playfully and continued to paint with my free hand. 

I took a vow to distance myself from Hongjoong and I have been failing miserably. Honestly, we got closer when he landed back in Cali. The kissing and holding hands has stopped mostly due to me. That’s a promise I did keep to myself, I didn’t want to keep making our feelings go into this any deeper than they have. I don’t know if it’s working but I've been trying my best not to think about him everyday like I was doing. 

 I feel like that’s why I entered this competition again. 

I had thoughts of not doing it and sitting back to watch my classmates succeed but my mind was just suffocating with thoughts of her and wanting to be with her that I needed to make myself busy. I have been a little distant while trying to do these projects but Hongjoong is such an understanding person, it really is a new feeling to me. I’m so used to someone wanting my attention all the time and just wanting me to focus on them. The fact he allows me to have space and doesn’t mind if I don’t talk to him  every second of the day, it makes me feel very relaxed. 

I bit into my burrito again and looked out the window. It was a pretty day in LA as usual though, the birds somewhat felt louder in a way. I would think about Seattle a lot. I know the city is probably covered in snow right now and the scenery is probably unimaginable. It snows in Philly, but something about the way it looks in Washington State just makes it comforting. Maybe because it was in a place I wasn’t familiar with and I wanted to visit the place again. Words from Hongjoong’s father still haunt me a little bit. I did need to tell him about the move to Seoul and how I’ll probably never live in America ever again if my career really blossomed over there. Even though he was very understanding, having someone move across the country that you possibly wanted to pursue can be a little different. 

I felt a pencil hit the side of my head and I turned to see Sarah looking at me. 

“Get back to work lover girl”

“Here you go,” I laughed, picking up the pencil and throwing it back at her. 

“Seeing him has thrown you off from your work” She walked over. 

“Not even, I’m just eating and enjoying the vibes”

“Parker when I bring food or anyone else, you always eat while finishing up”

“Breaks are a thing Sarah”

“You’re so in denial, it’s honestly insane.” She laughed and walked back to her seat. In denial? I don’t think I was in denial about anything. I simply was taking a break while I finished my food. 

I took the last bite of my food and stretched. I walked back over to my canvas and started to work on the background of it. I was kind of free painting, I had no idea what my midterm was going to be. I honestly was painting different pieces, just in case I just had to end up submitting something random. That isn’t like me at all and Mr. Cook can tell there is no feeling in what you make. I love that about him but when it comes to grading, I absolutely despise that side of him. He hated lazy work and it’s understandable, Mr. Cook had been an artist for over thirty years and teaching for about ten. I knew if he saw some of my canvas right now, he would laugh in my face while also scolding me right after. He’s such a weird emotional human being but I envy him for that. I envy anyone who had somewhat of a control of their emotions or how they felt.Speaking of the devil, he just walked back in and what’s the first thing he decides to.. 

Observe and walk around. Curse you. 

He finally gets to me and pauses. I mentally sigh and put down my paintbrush. I look at him and he’s already looking at me. 

“Look–”

“Parker, this is like bottom tier of what you normally do” 

“Kind of having a burnout”

“Or a love distraction,” I heard Mark whisper. I turned and glared at him then gave my attention back to Mr. Cook. 

“Who is she or he?” 

“No one,” I rubbed my neck and picked back up my paintbrush. 

“I won’t push but don’t let this person distract you from your purpose. You’re making a big move next year and you already know I have high expectations of you but someone else will have higher when you go out there”

“I know,” I groaned a little. This was kind of embarrassing, I know everyone was tuning us due to the amount of pencil erasing and paintbrushes moving on the canvas. It still made me feel a little uncomfortable because he was in father creative mode. 

“Now, don’t rush. You have time to create but doing these multiple canvases with meaningless details will not help you come up with something better. Go off campus sometimes and explore.” He said before walking back to his desk. 

I rubbed my eyes and threw my paintbrush in the bucket. I stormed out of the room, not even taking off my apron. I heard some of my classmates calling me but I just needed some fresh air. I walked up the four flights of stairs that were in our department till I got to the roof. I opened the door and quietly closed it behind me, it was some other students up here. I found an open space and sat down against the wall. I was so frustrated, I was more upset at the fact that Mr. Cook was right. I know he wants me to do my best but it can be a bit overwhelming when he applies all that pressure on me at one time. I took a few deep breaths and admired the view of the campus. 

“Parker?”

I looked up and saw…ah I can’t remember her name. 

“Soojin, I came and got some paint from the classroom last semester” 

Ah, I remember her now and her sinister type of energy. I didn’t feel it together though, maybe she was going through something when I felt it the first time. It made me feel super uneasy about her but now she has a regular aura. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing but just a plain aura. 

“Oh hey” 

“What brings you up here?” She sat down beside me, leaving space. 

Yeah, you’re more than welcome to sit down. 

“I needed to clear my head, it was getting a little–”

“Suffocating”

I stared at her for a second before blinking twice and looking away. 

“Yeah” 

“I understand that feeling” 

“Mm, every artist does once and a while” I feel it all the time though. 

“Just depends on the artist. Suffocation can be good sometimes” 

“So you like being suffocated by your feelings and just the overpowering of your emotions trying to trap you” 

“It makes me know I can feel something once and a while” 

Who was this girl? Those greenish gray eyes frighten me but kind of made me want to talk to her more. Was she attractive? Yes but was I attracted to her in that way? Mm maybe sexually because she is pretty as hell but not romantically. I wanted her in a friendly way like she just seemed like someone who didn’t mind digging and I don’t like people that dig but that’s what made me interested in her. How far would she dig? 

“Do I scare you Parker?” She smiled. 

“Not necessarily, you just make me a little anxious” 

“Anxious?”

“As in, I don’t know what’s going to come out your mouth” 

“Is that a bad thing?” 

“Not bad but not exactly good either” 

“You scare me Parker” She looked out into the campus and moved, her now honey blonde straight hair, out her face. How did I scare her? This was the second conversation we ever had, the first time we spoke was barely a conversation honestly. 

“Why?”

“You’re a bomb, I can tell” 

“A bomb?”

“Nuclear, to be exact” 

“I’m not understanding” 

She looked at me and moved closer, her mouth near my ear. I kind of flinched just because I didn’t know her really and she was making me nervous. 

“One day, you’re going to explode and wipe out everything in your path,” She whispered, dragging her finger up my arm painfully slow. 

I looked at her and she smirked, standing up in front of me. I looked at her with my eyebrow raised. Is it me or is she a little insane? I don’t know what her words meant but I feel like she’s been watching me and that makes me a little scared. Did she know something I didn’t? What kind of sci-fi bullshit was she on? 

“Yeah, you scare me now” I stood up. 

“I was just messing around with you, Parker. Remember you don’t know what is going to come out my mouth” she laughed. 

I awkwardly laughed and checked my watch. Shit, I didn’t know I had been out here for twenty minutes. Mr. Cook is definitely going to get on my ass. 

“This was… something but I have to go”

I caught myself from bowing, which was a habit I picked up from Korea. So I have been catching myself ever since I got back last year. I settled for a slight wave and made my way downstairs. I don’t know if I will ever go up there to get fresh again. Soojin was a little…not right in the head, that’s probably the nicest way I could put it. I wanted to try to be friends but after that, I don’t think so really. Her sinister energy started to push through after she whispered in my ear. It made me want to sink into her but also run away from her. 

Parker, are you really thinking about her in that way right now? I haven’t had sex in a few months, I think my mind is going crazy.

I walked into the classroom as I tried to calm down my dirty thoughts about pushing Soojin into my bedroom and doing terrible things to her. I saw that only two of my classmates were still here, trying to finish up some details. Mr. Cook was sitting at his desk on his computer, typing away. I walked over slowly and sat in the chair next to him. 

“Are you cooled down now?” He said, still typing. 

“Yeah” I folded my arms. 

“Parker, you know I don’t say things to upset you” 

“I know, you just want the best for me and I appreciate it” 

I saw him smile and put up his fist. I rolled my eyes playfully and bumped it with my mind. I loved our relationship and I’ll never take it for granted. Never. 

“Some guy came looking for you”

“What does he look like?”

“He has split dye hair”

“Mm Hongjoong, where did he go?” 

“He said if you come by to tell you, he’ll be in the library if you want to him there” 

I nodded and walked to my station. I took off my apron and started to pack up. I put my canvas in the back and put my palettes inside my desk. 

“Is that the person your classmates were talking about?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about” I put on my jacket and grabbed my bag, heading for the door. 

“Make sure you’re on time tomorrow Parker”

I threw up the deuces and started to make my way to the library. Maybe I should stop by starbucks to get him some tea and cream cheese danish. I personally think they are disgusting but he will destroy one in about ten seconds. I smiled thinking about the look on his face when I walked in with his favorite snack food. 

Ah.. Kim Hongjoong, you got me hooked on you. 

I made a stop at Starbucks then proceeded to the library. I spoke to a few people on the way, most of them being art students. Everyone was so stressed about the competition that they were telling me they were pulling all nighters to brainstorm for the second round. I don’t know if it was a confidence thing but I definitely haven’t pulled an all nighter yet due to this. If I make it to the last round that is probably when it will break me and evil Parker will start to terrorize herself. 

I walked into the library and started to search for Joong. I found him in the back with his nose in a book. I smiled and walked over, sitting beside him. He made eye contact with me and he provided me with the biggest smile. I handed him the tea and the brown bag. 

“I know this isn’t” He looked at me with wide eyes. 

“The last one they had for tonight” I took off my jacket.

“Bless your soul,” He bit into the danish. 

I smiled and pulled out my drawing pad along with my pencil box. I needed to think about what I was going to do for my midterm while needing to sketch out what I wanted my next sculpture to look like. Being a creative was nerve wracking sometimes, just always thinking about what you could do differently is frustrating. I don’t want to be a repetitive artist or just keep repeating the same concepts. I needed something fresh and something that no one would think of. 

“You’re overthinking love,” I heard him say. 

“It’s so hard to think when you’re under pressure” 

“I understand that, my music production class has been a pain in my ass” 

“There’s a course of that” 

“Yeah, it’s a two part course. I take class course two in the fall”

“Are you having trouble now?”

“No, not really. Our final is a song, I already planned it out. Just got to find the right words to put it together now”

I wasn’t even surprised at him, Joong was quick on his feet. He always had a plan for her pieces, he let me listen to some of his past assignments and I was just amazed at him. I wish I could think fast and know what I wanted to do next but every artist doesn’t have power sadly. I was unfortunately in the percentage who took a long time or had to have something traumatic happen for me to know what to do next. I looked at her as he typed away on her laptop. He looks so in the zone, I know whatever he’s writing about is going to be amazing just the others. 

“Joong” 

“Mm?”

“Can we go to the beach this weekend?”

“In March?” He looked over at me. 

“I know it’s a little chilly but I need to go somewhere I don’t go to often” 

He started to tap his head. She does that whenever she’s thinking. 

“Oo, how about the aquarium?” 

“I never been” 

His mouth dropped. 

“Parker, are you fucking serious?”

“No cap detected over here” 

“Oh yeah, we’re going”

I saw him open a different browser and type in California aquariums. I laughed a little at his face, he had a look of playful disgust. I didn’t know it was offensive to never go see the imprisonment of sea animals. 

“Here we go. Since you said new scenery” He turned the laptop towards me. 

My eyes widened as I saw Monterey Bay Aquarium, that’s about five hours from here. Does that mean she wants to do something like an overnight trip? 

An overnight trip with Hongjoong. God, please pray for my hormones. 

“Joong” 

“Before you say anything, I’m aware it’s five hours away and if you’re uncomfortable with being with me alone you can ask your roommates if they want to come”

I’m afraid you’ll be uncomfortable with me Hongjoong, not the other way around. 

“It’s not that, I just didn’t expect you to go so far with just me” 

“Parker, you hopped on a plane to come spend the holidays with me and my family. I think I owe you one” 

“Not really” 

“Do you not want to go?” 

“I do” 

“Then stop with the excuses” He smiled and started to buy the tickets. 

I blushed and started to do some random drawings. He was going to be the death of me and the cause was going to be heart expulsion through mental chains. I got out of my thoughts when I felt the cream from the danish on my cheek. 

“I know you just didn’t” 

“You start drowning in your own head when you aren’t talking sometimes,” He took a napkin from the bag and wiped my cheek. 

“Do you want my attention Mr. Kim?” I rested my chin in my propped up hand. 

His cheeks suddenly started to turn a light pink. He looked away, rubbing his neck. It was nice to know I could make him blush so easily. It was easy for him to make my heart race against these chains. The feeling irritated me to the fullest but I tried to let it go because it was him. 

“I’m going to check out a book, b-be right back” 

He got up and started to walk to the isle of sci-fi romance books. I smiled a little at him and continued to draw. That was the first time I ever heard him stutter, I wanted to make him stutter more. I looked at what I was drawing and it looked like Hongjoong’s eyes. I let out a heavy sigh and rubbed my eyes. This is what I meant, when I was around him I started to be fixated on hi,. I don’t have a feeling of regret but how was I supposed to keep my distance on the trip? It wouldn’t be the first time we slept in the same bed because we shared his bed when I was in Seattle but his parents were there so I knew nothing would happen. This would be different though. It would just be us two…alone in a hotel room. The things that ran through my head were very unholy and his parents were to crack it up, they would scold for the bad things I want to do to their son. 

I looked up and saw him talking in depth and laughing with the student who was working at the desk. I could tell by her face that it was captivating with how handsome Joong was and I know that she is spitting every corny pick up line to keep him there. I smiled a little, sketching some more on my pad. It didn’t matter how I felt about other people talking to him. I knew me and him would probably never succeed in being together. I was very unfit. 

Unfit to be his lover. 

The way I wanted my life to be, being in love was the last thing on my list and my list was pretty big of things I wanted to achieve. I know some would say “you can accomplish it with your partner” but I personally couldn’t do that. Just looking back on my relationship with Yeosang, I was consumed by him. He was all I wanted and more, I was very much willing to push everything back for him. I didn’t want to do that to myself again. I didn’t want to see myself go down that road again. Hongjoong deserves someone who would give their all without thinking twice, I wasn’t that person. I would self sabotage myself to make him not want me or question why he wanted to be with me in the first place. He didn’t deserve the mind games because his mind was beautiful and strong but his feelings were sensitive. 

I felt something poke in my ear and I jumped. I looked and Hongjoong was laughing at me. 

“You were so deep in thought, you didn’t notice me come back” 

“I was thinking about something”

“You’re always thinking about something Parker,” he smiled, opening the book. 

“Is it a bad thing?” 

“I didn’t say that” 

I stared at him a little and he looked at me. He raised his hand, bringing it close to my face. I flinched a little as it landed on my cheek. He rubbed it a little then pulled it. 

“You have such a staring problem Ms. Williams” 

“You don’t seem to mind it Mr. Kim” Parker you’re such a flirt, it’s honestly insane at this point. He blushed a little, pulling his hand back. 

“You probably had no problem getting numbers growing up” 

“What makes you say that?”

“Your face when you flirt is very…I don’t know it’s like you can put people in a trace” 

“I’ve heard that before but I didn’t understand it”

“Well whoever your ex is, they are dumb for leaving you” 

I looked down and frowned a little. I wish I was ready to tell him about Yeosang but I haven’t been able to explain to anyone that situation without crying my eyes out. 

“I’m sorry Parker, I didn’t–”

“It’s fine, I just wish I could talk about it without getting upset” 

“No rush, you can talk to me about it when you’re ready”

I…I just never met someone who tries to understand me like you do. Why are you patient with me? Why don’t you push me to open up to you? Why aren’t you trying to rip my heart out so it exposes all of what makes me into the person I am? 

“Thank you for understanding”

“Trauma is a real thing and hard to open back up, of course I understand” 

I nodded and continued to draw random things as he went back to studying. We spent another two hours in the library and even ate there. I ran to get us food from the subway that was in the cafe. I have never spent this long in the library since I've been on this campus. I didn’t realize how comforting it was but considering I’m in my major, there was no need to come here when I had the studio. If Joong ever wanted me to come back with him… I wouldn’t mind it. 

After packing up our stuff, we headed out the front doors and we walked to the middle of campus. Our dorms were in the opposite directions from each other so this was the closest we could walk to each other. 

“Please get some sleep Parker, don’t be up all night trying to create”

“I can’t make any promises but I will try” 

“That’s all I want you to do is try,” he smiled. 

He stretched out his arms and I walked forward to hug him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he wrapped his arms around my waist. His head rested on top of mine and I tightened the hug a little. Friends don’t hug this long, do they? We pulled away slightly and I pressed my forehead on his, sighing. 

“Hongjoong”

“I know” 

He pulled away and smiled at me. His smiles are always so warm and I could never get tired taking them in. He waved and started to walk away, I waved back heading the other direction. 

I should have kissed him, even though it would be wrong and I would probably send myself into an emotional spiral thinking about his lips on mine the whole night..

I really should’ve kissed him and dealt with the consequences to suffocate me later. 

taglist: @hwaslayer

[bananaactivity]

Update if I spelt something wrong it could have changed the whole post I just sent you 😭 Bree would be 17 and Jessie would be 18 I think i accidentally typed 19 (if I didn't this is embarrassing)

Yah that is embarrassing lmao,

I’ll answer your og ask with some art when I have some time to draw but rn I’m thinking about my otp crack ship (KARCUS my beloved)

I think it’s funny to ship characters together that are similar stereotypes.

One I was just thinking about today was Kirby Buckets and Fletcher Quimby (from Ant Farm) but like a platonic friendship….

DO YOU SEE THE VISION PLS

They’re both artists but there also both dumbasses, I think it be hilarious if Kirby was drawing some dumb shit and shows Fletcher to like… art kid flex on him but Fletcher shows him a life sized statue he sculpted of Chyna as well as a oil panting of Olive that looks like a renaissance painting while Kirby is gagged.

(Kirby and Fletcher were my idols back when I was younger I loved seeing characters who were known as the “artist kid” I felt so seen lmao. I hated Kirby’s art style a little but he was still my idol lol)

I wish the LR writers gave Bree as much of personality as Jesse got :( I love Jesse sm. That’s the only reason I had to think before considering this ship. But Bree would think Jesse is a badass as well as being happy to talk to other girls. Jesse would probably push Bree to follow her dreams of exploring the world.

They would both complain about Bob and Luke too ngl. Also complaining about past relationships with boys. I feel like Jessie would like Chase way more then Bree would like her to ( They’re both straight A smarty pants and Chase is strict) and shed call Adam a hunk which would also kinda irk Bree.

That’s her brother EWWW, but we all know if she got a peek at Tony she’d be falling all over bro. Leo would probably joke around with her a lot and then start tweaking cause all the Ross kids won’t leave him alone about his bionics.

Mr Davenport probably already knows the Ross’ ( I heard all rich people know each other or something) that’s probably how Jesse and Bree would meet. Davenport invites The Ross’ to a dinner and they bring their kids and nanny and suggest that the bionic three get invited because their kids want to meet them. Leo comes because he’ll be damned if he gets left out only to regret it because he’s less popular and well known so by extension the other kids feel more comfy bothering the shit out of him.

(Personally it’s hard for me to imagine romantic relationships, it’s so rude of myself to not get them as much as I’d like but they’d probably have fun going to see boy bands and shopping together. I struggled to write the fic for Kai Brewer and Marcus Davenport (karcus) and even then they aren’t romantic, they are assholes)

LOL that means that Remix ( mighty med) and Bailey ( suite life on deck) and Jesse ( Jesse lol) all exist in the same universe… LMFAOOOOOO THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS.

If Kickin it and Labrats exist that means Ryker and Carson and Brody and Chase, Bree and Sloane, Jack and Troy all exist together too… that was a hard one to wrap my head around and nobody even knows who half those people are because Kickin it underused characters so bad.

BUT THIS IS ABOUT JESSE AND BREE.

They seem like they’d be good friends and a good crackship too, I’ll draw um later but someone else needs to write the 20 chapter fic with the background I added cause I’m still struggling on updating the last 10 of my Karcus fic while also rewriting it to fit my new writing style… anyone sees this feel free to steal and write that crack fic

Thanks for reading my yap sesh lol

[lizardkingeliot]

Unfortunately I’m feeling inspired to embrace hyping tf out of my own work by that last reblog so!!! Hi. I posted the final chapter of my latest Queliot fic last week and it would mean the world to me for more people to come check it out. This is the culmination of a series I’ve been working on for the past 3 years and it truly was the biggest labor of love. I think most people who follow me are aware of it already, but if you’re in the mood to read 3 entire Queliot novels you can find the series page here.

I’m gonna put the opening scene of the latest chapter below a cut because I think it’s cute lol. You can find said chapter here, or start from chapter one here. And I’d love to hear from you guys in the comments section after you finish reading! Our fandom is so teeny tiny now and people just do not comment the way they used to, but connecting with you all when I post is my most favorite part. 💖 

ANYWAY. Here’s the opening scene. Enjoy! 🥰

—

“That—” Quentin could hardly get the words to come he was laughing so much. Flat on his back gazing up at the ceiling, the color of it sea water blue. “That really tickles, um—”

“Wouldn’t tickle nearly as much if you’d stop squirming, honey love.”

“I’m not squirming,” Quentin said, absolutely squirming. Eliot’s paintbrush swooping over his ribcage like the tip of a finger. “Shut up.” The words were soft on his tongue, not a hint of heat behind them. Lifting one hand slowly, touching Eliot soft on the shoulder. “This can’t seriously be, like—the next level of. You know…”

Slowly, Eliot let his eyes drift up to Quentin’s face. “Confused about what tent we’re in already?” He grinned, lifting his brush for a moment, running the palm of his free hand over Quentin’s brow gently, gently. “This isn’t the next level of anything, baby. Daddy just loves to watch you squirm.”

“You’re an idiot,” Quentin slurred, drunk on love that melted on his tongue sweet as honey. “What are you even—” Sucking a breath when the tip of Eliot’s brush pressed to his skin again. “Are you turning me into a Bob Ross painting on purpose?”

Eliot laughed, the sound of it a dark little rumble. “Something something horny little trees,” he said, picking up a little paint from his palette. The tip of his brush marking Quentin’s skin with a shock of blue.

The tent they were in was dedicated mostly to nude life drawing classes, sculpting, and photography. With one little alcove tucked into the back big enough for three or four couples at a time to indulge in body painting. Quentin was lying on a table with his head propped up on a cushy pillow. Eliot hovering over him with a palette splashed with paint, looking so goddamn beautiful Quentin almost couldn’t stand it. With his hair all soft and his brows pinched together, deeply and entirely focused on his task.

“Where is that supposed to be?” Quentin gazed down at the upside down image of a landscape blooming to life on his torso. The dip of his belly a lake rimmed in trees, a cloud-dappled sky on his ribcage.

Eliot hummed, the tip of his brush swirled in orange flecked with yellow. “I don’t know,” he said, flashing a grin, mapping out a shape of a big burning sun just between Quentin’s nipples. “Maybe it’s… Fillory?”

Quentin laughed, reaching up and brushing a curl away from Eliot’s eye. “If it’s Fillory it, um—” He touched Eliot on the back of his neck, his shoulder. Struck through with such fondness he struggled to draw a single breath. “Needs more talking animals.”

Eliot flicked his gaze up at Quentin, pulling back, cleaning the paint from his brush with a burst of magic. “Are we talking a little Toucan Sam action here, or…” He grinned, pinching his bottom lip in his teeth. “More like Tony the Tiger?”

“Do you think—” Quentin snorted a laugh, let it ripple through him so hard it shook the table. “Do you think Fillory is just full of cereal mascots, El?”

Eliot gave an airy little sigh, gesturing with his brush as he said—“Guess you’ll just have to read me your little fanboy bibles one day so I can find out.”

“You want me—” Quentin nearly choked on the sound of his own words. Suddenly—subspace was hovering in the periphery of his vision. Soft gush in his head like he was sinking slowly underwater. “You want me to read the Fillory books to you?”

Eliot swirled his brush in cheerful green, shot Quentin a soft little smirk. “I’d listen to you read the phone book,” he said, and winked, and immediately turned his attention to his painting again. “Now, I think maybe we need a bit more—”

“Let’s, um—” Quentin gripped the bare curve of Eliot’s elbow. A living, breathing hunger rising up from the depths and seizing him like hooks in his belly. “Let’s go back to our room. I—”

“Someone’s itching for a spanking, I see.” Eliot met Quentin’s narrow-eyed gaze, the corners of his mouth curling up. “Shove your waistband down for me just a little, darling. Daddy needs more canvas.”

Quentin pushed the tiniest whine from his throat. Barefoot and shirtless, there was so little keeping his body from total abandon. He could have slipped out of his little shorts with such ease right then, presented himself bent and quivering over the edge of the table. He could have begged for Eliot to fuck him right there in front of the others. Create the most masterful of all masterpieces with nothing more than bare flesh. Instead—

Quentin relented at once. Shoving one side of his waistband down to expose the bony rise of his hip. Eyes on Eliot, watching him take in the sight of all that fresh bare skin. Tongue darting out to swipe along the swell of his bottom lip, his eyes all flushed with a dark and almost unbearable hunger. Like he was only just barely containing the wild beast snarling within.

“Good boy,” Eliot said, his voice a soft low rumble. Holding onto his brush with one hand, rubbing the bare flesh of Quentin’s thigh with the other. “Hold still now.” He winked again, and Quentin’s whole body felt like it was being plunged into bubbly warm water. “No squirming.”

[feyresdaughter]

A Court of Frost and Starlight, chapter 25-28:

I hadn’t even been back to the town house. Hadn’t even told Rhys. I’d woken at dawn, Rhys already off to meet with Az and Cassian at Devlon’s camp, and decided to hell with waiting. Putting life off didn’t make a lick of sense. I knew what I wanted. There was no reason to delay.

YES HONEY, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT

I couldn’t stop the tears that blurred my vision. Couldn’t stop myself from remembering those years in that cottage, the hollow ache of hunger. The image of those three little containers of paint that I’d savored. “I didn’t know it existed,”I managed to whisper. Even with all the committees that I volunteered to help, they had not mentioned it. I didn’t know that there was a place, a world, where artists might be valued. Taken care of. I’d never dreamed of such a thing.

It's what she dreamed of as a human and now she can help the people who are in a similar situation as her 😭

Ressina asked, “So what are you going to do with it? The studio.” I surveyed the empty space before me. Not empty— waiting. And from far away, as if it was carried on the cold wind, I heard the Suriel’s voice. Feyre Archeron, a request. Leave this world a better place than how you found it.

She's making the world a better place 🥺

A minute passed by. Then two. “Come on,” Ressina muttered. “Perhaps they had the wrong time?” But as I said it, they emerged. Ressina and I held our breath as the pack of them rounded the corner, aiming for the studio. Ten children, High Fae and faerie, and some of their parents.

YASSSS I love it

If there were children who might not be able to talk about what they’d endured, but could perhaps paint or draw or sculpt it. Perhaps they wouldn’t do any of those things , but the act of creating something … it could be a balm to them. As it was for me. As it was for the weaver, and Ressina, and so many of the artists in this city.

No one and nothing can ever convince me that this is stupid. No anti in the whole wide world. It's amazing. Feyre took what helped her through hard times and made something bigger of it, helping many people

How soon do classes start? was the most frequent question. The close second being How much does it cost? Nothing. Nothing, we told them. It was free. No child or family would ever pay for classes here— or the supplies.

“Rough day at the office?”I pushed back a strand of my hair. Knowing it was likely streaked with blue paint. Since my fingers were covered in it. “You should see Ressina.”Indeed, she’d gone into the back moments ago to wash off a face full of red paint. Courtesy of one of the children, who’d deemed it a good idea to form a bubble of all the paint to see what color it would turn, and then float it across the room. Where it collided with her face.

Paint smeared Feyre being happy and enjoying life is my favorite Feyre

“They don’t take their paintings home?” - “These will dry first, but I asked her if she wanted me to keep this somewhere special. She said to throw it out.” Rhys’s eyes danced with worry. I said quietly, “I want to keep it. To put in my future office. So we don’t forget.”

She would never forget but it's adorable

Rhys helped me with my coat, stealing a kiss before we walked out into the sunny, frigid day

AWWWW SJM PLS YOU MAKE MY HEART FLUTTER

I linked my arm through his, nestling into his warmth. “It’s strange,”I murmured. Rhys angled his head. “What is?”I smiled. At him, at the Rainbow, at the city. “This feeling, this excitement to wake up every day. To see you, and to work, and to just be here.”

She's literally come so far and I'm so proud of my Feyre

So I leaned into him, into that unfailing strength, and said down the bond, "You make me so very happy. My life is happy, and I will never stop being grateful that you are in it." I looked up to find him not at all ashamed to have tears slipping down his cheeks in public. I brushed a few away before the chill wind could freeze them, and Rhys whispered in my ear, “I will never stop being grateful to have you in my life, either, Feyre darling. And no matter what lies ahead”—a small, joyous smile at that—“we will face it together. Enjoy every moment of it together.”

And even after that. "I love you," I said down the bond. "What’s not to love?" Before I could elbow him, Rhys kissed me again, breathless and swift.

Adorable fucking idiots

To the stars who listen, Feyre.

To the dreams that are answered, Rhys.

Acofas has such a Fairytale (Feyretale) ending and I love it

[nochuelinha]

Chapter 2: Phoenix

 I've never seen many movies, but I've read many books and in both of them the idea is represented that when you die, you see a movie of your life, well honestly, there's not much to see in my case, but I didn't see anything, just a vast, empty darkness. It wasn't haunting, it was almost welcoming. If there is something greater that commands us and expects the best of us, then it chose me and gave me a second chance, I opened my eyes once more.

     It was a bright room, with seemingly expensive furniture that I'm sure wasn't mine. I sat down and realized I was on a kind of stretcher, softer than my own bed. I looked around and every detail flashed before my eyes, the texture of the paint on a painting, the droplets running down the large windows that framed the room, I looked down at my feet, a soft carpet, and a tiny leaf that had fallen onto it. Everything seemed more alive, my touch was deeper, the smell of the wet forest, the singing of birds and the running of some animal, I wasn't that close, but I could hear its heart, but mine wasn't working, afraid of what I would see, I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror.

     You see, I never had much time to think about what to do with my hair, whether my skin looked good enough or how to put on decent make-up, my life was made for practicality and simplicity, appearance was never a problem for me. But there in front of my eyes I saw beauty, genuine beauty, pale skin, without any blemish, only the freckles that reminded me of my beloved constellations, full cheeks, very dark hair, long and I've never seen it so silky, a plump, red mouth, defined and full eyebrows, but the highlight was the eyes, red like my attacker. Through the reflection of the mirror I saw him enter, the angel who comforted me.

___ Welcome to a new world - he sounded gentle, but sad at the same time - My name is Edward Cullen, we found you in Seattle, unfortunately we arrived late and we couldn't stop your transformation, it was either that or you would die. Now you're one of us - he walked over and sat down in an armchair.

___ One of what? - I sat down on the stretcher and looked at him more closely. If with my human eyes I saw him as an angel, now with these I see pure perfection, it's dangerous the way he's been sculpted. He looked at me and smiled. I felt naked under his gaze, as if he could read my thoughts.

___ A vampire - still smiling - We have much more enhanced abilities such as sight, smell and touch, some of us have special abilities, Alice, my sister, can see the future, she saw you, that's why we were able to rescue you. I can read thoughts - ah that explains a lot - But I try to be as courteous as possible and not read without the person's permission...

___ That's a hairy lie he's telling - another man was standing in the doorway, tall and muscular - I'm Emmett, I'm the one who took out the bum who attacked you - he smiled proudly. A blonde woman appeared next to him, if I was feeling pretty, nothing compared to her, she was delicate and feminine. She leaned against Emmett and gave me a small smile.

___ I'm Rosalie, I'm sorry you had to go through this, it's a curse - her tone was melancholy. Emmett put his arm around her waist and kissed her forehead, whispering "don't scare her". I smiled at them both.

___ My name is Stella, I don't want to be rude, but where am I? - I asked a little anxiously, but my heart wasn't beating, it was something that was on my mind, I looked at Edward in anticipation.

___ We brought you to our home in Forks, 220km from Seattle, we thought it would be better for you to adapt, Carlisle is willing to make you part of our family, we'll help you and if you like you can leave whenever you feel the need - Family? I've never had anything like this, and the kindness with which they were treating me was making me a little emotional - Let's introduce you to the others - he stood up and waited for me, I mirrored his actions and we left the room, I went down a corridor. Two couples were sitting talking about something; they stopped as soon as we arrived. Two blond men, the older one was sitting on the sofa next to a brunette woman with wavy hair, they were beautiful like the rest of the people in the house, they smiled at me with welcoming eyes, I repeated the gesture.

     The other was also blonde, but his face was more closed, and the woman next to him had a childish smile and looked like a fairy. She got up and came over to me, pulled me close and hugged me - what was the last time I'd been hugged? I promptly returned her embrace.

___ I'm sorry we didn't get there in time to make you suffer less, but you're with us now and everything will be fine - and I believed every word she said, her presence calmed me and I recognized her voice, it was she who had spoken to me for the first time - We've all been through the same as you, so we understand how you feel, we'll take you in and look after you, don't worry - I felt my eyes tearing up, was I dreaming ? Edward put his hand on my eye and squeezed it, I understood his gesture as if he was saying that everything was real - Think now that you are like a phoenix that has passed through the flames.

     I was introduced to Jasper, his partner, Carlisle and Esme, the parents of this family, Esme was so kind and sweet, like hot chocolate on a winter's day. Carlisle was welcoming like a father receiving his son after days away from home, I never thought I could feel like that or be part of something like a family, mind you, I've thought about building a family, but I have no idea how that would work, but here and now, I see how rewarding it is to have a second chance at life. So as Alice pointed out, I'll make myself a phoenix.

[kouhsuu]

hii hello who are you whats your lore!!

MY LORE okay that's a new one

*THIS IS GONNA BE LONG AND RAMBLY*

Who I am? 17 year old genderfluid digital and traditional artist 👍

For my lore as an artist: My dad is a painter so from a very young age i was surrounded by art materials literally taking up half our small living room because of the easles, giant canvas rolls, wood, cabinets full of paints and brushes, etc.

Essentially I was very encouraged by him to draw lol, and it also came out of me just finding art so much fun in general. I knew that if I got good enough at it I could draw almost anything I wanted if i pushed myself to learn.

I get verrry engrossed learning anything creative and visual, whether it be making my own website, sewing, sculpting, video editing, 3d modelling, painting, woodworking, etc it's all SO! MUCH! FUN!! I also have to specify visual creativity because oh boy can i not stand trying to make music as much as i want to.

In school I was very obviously the art kid and one of the weird kids, but luckily never got bullied because i was charismatic enough and generally there weren't major major assholes at my schools somehow. I usually was involved with the special programs in my schools because of my enthusiasm to learn and participate, so I got an opportunity to enroll into an early scholarship program for LaGuardia art school in middle school which... i ended up turning down because i thought it would be too much work being in a college like that... which honestly only kind of regret because honestly now i'd rather get into drafting and architecture.

Speaking of drafting and architecture! The reason my dad became a painter is because my grandma couldn't afford to send him to school to become an architect, so he pushed me to go into the field as well now that I have the opportunity. I didn't really feel like it but it seemed kind of interesting designing buildings because if i knew how buildings were made, i could more accurately put detail into my art xD Most decisions I make are to improve my own artwork because it's my life and soul, and luckily i ended up getting interested into working with more drafting.

My first social media i posted art on was google plus, then came deviantart, then came youtube, then twitter, and now tumblr (and cohost & itaku). I still use twitter but my main account (@/hamunako) is essentially inactive, I don't care enough to keep posting there nor do i have the motivation NOR do i want to have the anxiety to feel like I have to keep posting because uh oh people wont interact with me otherwise!!!!! Now I just use a private account with less than 25 followers and its the best. I made this Tumblr account though just in case twitter finally deleted itself off of the face of the planet, and also because i've always wanted to figure out how tumblr works & instagram confused me even more than tumblr...

As for why i've been drawing SOOOO much lonely wolf treat lately??? Short answer: ADHD (possible autism too?), Long answer: A long long time ago I watched manlybadasshero's playthrough of lonely wolf treat and loved it, then i forgot about it until i went on itch a while ago and saw that nami had posted mochi in frosting so I was like WOAH THERE'S STILL NEW CHAPTERS?! I got even more into it when it turned out one of my new friends ALSO had played lonely wolf treat so we drew the characters and it allllll spiraled from there.

Can't think of anything else interesting to share regarding my lore but yeah!!! Also I take commissions, just message me and i'll show what I can do and my prices! Don't have a formal post yet but i'll get to it at some point, i'm not very formal in the first place xP

[andrewmoocow]

Little Homeworld Life chapter 23: Eye of the Beholder (originally posted on May 29, 2023)

AN: Took me a long while, but Squaridot has her own episode at long last! Unfortunately, it'll be one of the last two fun slice of life episodes we'll get, the second being the one after this, before we move onto the finale of Little Homeworld and inevitably, the start of this universe's 12-chapter grand finale "Steven Universe Snake Eyes". Yeah, if Ronaldo's outburst last episode was any indication, combined with the final scene of the last episode of Black Pearl Brigade, we shall finally meet the Snake People, or Sneople, face to face. However, what I have planned has yet to come. In the meantime, have some Peridot-brand shenanigans in probably a much shorter chapter than usual.

Synopsis: Squaridot learns about meep morps from Peridot.

Cast:

Shelby Rabara as Squaridot, Peridot

Jennifer Paz as Lapis, Laz, Zuli

Gal Gadot as Desert Glass

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Amy Sedaris as Teal Zircon

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl, The Black Pearl Brigade, Yellow Pearl

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper, Superfan Rose, Hippie Rose, Shy Rose, Carnelian, Skinny Jasper

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Casey Lee Williams as Cat's Eye

Christine Pedi as Holly Blue Agate

Hayley Kiyoko as Morganite

Christine Baranski as Hessonite

Featuring Nolan North as Ross Roberts

--

"Howdy folks, my name is Ross Roberts, and welcome to this week's installment of The Wonders of Creativity." A painter in a ridiculously huge afro said in an incredibly soothing voice to his viewers at home. Viewers like Squaridot, for example, who was watching the program very intently. "For this episode, we're going to paint a nice little picture of a cozy cabin in the woods. That's right." The host began his demonstration by showing off each of his paints as he stuck his brush in them. "Now then, we're just going to start with a little Virtuous Viridian for the grass. Can't have a forest without grass."

"Fascinating." Squaridot muttered in wonder as Ross Roberts continued painting his forest scene and giving instructions overly relaxingly.

"I do declare; we're making some good progress so far." Ross stated after he finished painting the grass, some happy little trees, and the beginnings of a bright sun in the sky." He then dabbed his brush in some blue, which he dubbed Blue Angels. "Now then, let's add some Blue Angels into the mix to form a clear summer sky." Unfortunately, Ross lost his grip and accidentally spilled his entire pallet onto his canvas, much to Squaridot's shock and dismay. "Whoo, that did not go the way I wanted it to!" he exclaimed at his own clumsiness before turning to his viewer with a shrug. "But that's okay. Oftentimes in art, you make mistakes, but they can also be opportunities to learn. I may not have gotten the painting I wanted, but I can still make something new out of it."

"Like what?" Squaridot asked Ross, even though he could not answer, before he pulled out a paintball gun from off-screen and fired it at his canvas, stunning Squaridot as the canvas was utterly pelted with paintballs. "WOW!"

"There now, that ain't so bad." Ross declared serenely. "Now then, I'm afraid that's all the time we have for today, folks. So from all of us here, I'd like to wish you a happy painting; God bless us, everyone, and remember, hugs, not drugs." The program then ended, leaving Squaridot amazed at how Ross Roberts was so calm the entire episode.

"That was so interesting!" Squaridot gasped to herself. "I never realized how you can do literally anything with art! I must tell somebody about this." Luckily, she knew exactly who to tell about her experience.

--

"Not bad, you guys." Lapis complimented her sculpting students' work elsewhere in Little Homeworld. "Hey, if you want, you can submit your work to a meep morp show we're putting on later today."

"Excellent." Black Rutile declared while creating a sculpture of herself from clay. "I've been constantly pondering building a statue to myself in honor of how amazing I am, and I must display it for all to see."

"Boy, you're as conceited as ever." Peridot stuck her tongue out at Black Rutile before seeing Squaridot rush up to her. "Oh, Squaridot, good day to you."

"Peridot, I come to tell you something that I really want to do!" Squaridot exclaimed eagerly. "I want to do some art!"

"Oh, took you long enough!" Peridot laughed heartily at her squarer counterpart. "Though Lapis and I prefer to call them meep morps, we're okay if you insist on calling it art."

"Good to see a fellow artist among us," Lapis added. "What made you want to pursue it, Square?"

"I was just binging episodes upon episodes of Ross Roberts' The Wonders of Creativity," Squaridot answered. "I've just been suckered into how soothing the host's voice was."

"Yeah, that is definitely a big draw of the program," Peridot stated with a hand on Squaridot's shoulder. "But on a related subject, let's talk about all the different kinds of meep morps you can do! For example, Lapis teaches sculpting, but there's also painting, drawing, literature, photography, and music. Or you can do what we do and throw random things together to make something new."

"Hey, that reminds me," Squaridot replied. "what made you two pursue art, and why do you call it meep morps?"

"Well, I chose to call them meep morps because I thought it would be funny," Lapis revealed. "I mean, just those words together kept making me laugh, and it just stuck."

"As for how we got into artwork, that's quite a tale," Peridot added. "You see, it all started when we were making ourselves home at the barn."

--

"Well, Lapis, how are you doing remaking this old barn?" Peridot asked Lapis while the two were busy remodeling the barn to fit their needs. Earlier that day, Lapis had tossed a truck into the wall above the big doors as a way of venting her frustrations with Jasper, and that gave Peridot the idea to spruce up the place instead of leaving it to be devoured by the numerous termites lurking there.

"Coming along nicely," Lapis replied while lifting up the silo with a pair of water arms and positioning it at the side of the barn. "You're good to go now!"

"Excellent!" Peridot declared before she welded the silo into the wall with her tools. "That should do the trick; the barn's exterior has officially been overhauled. Now what to do about the inside?"

"Not sure if we really need a fridge or heating or something," Lapis observed the current status of their pet project. "What do you think?"

"I don't know; maybe some art could do," Peridot suggested before pulling out her tablet and looking up art pieces online. "Unfortunately, a lot of these seem ridiculously expensive. I mean, this old Japanese painting of an orange fire ninja fighting a blue ice ninja is worth $1,081,992! Do you know how much that's worth in Minerals?!"

"Beats me; I was never really up to date on the Gem economy." Lapis shrugged while Peridot crunched the Gem equivalent of such a price.

"About 89,1006 minerals!" Peridot yelled in response and shoved her tablet in Lapis's face. "We don't have that kind of money!"

"So, are you suggesting we make some ourselves?" Lapis suggested. "What ideas do you have?"

"I'm glad you asked." Peridot proclaimed as she looked around the farm. "There's just so much we can do with all this old junk lying around. Plus, it could be a good, and less dangerous, way of coping with stress."

"Yeah, I like the sound of that meep morp." Lapis agreed before she started laughing. "Oh my stars, why did I think that?!" she chuckled. "It's just such a funny word!"

"That did sound pretty funny!" Peridot added while rolling on the grass in amusement. "Why don't we start calling out art pieces meep morps?!"

"Yeah, great idea!" Lapis continued laughing before she realized what she and Peridot just did. "Wait, what?"

--

Back in the present and later in the day, Squaridot had begun work on her own meep morp to enter into the art show with help from Peridot, Lapis, Laz, and Zuli. For her first attempt, she had constructed a perfect replica of her old Attack Pod from back when she was a servant of Hessonite. "Well, what do you think? Not bad for my first attempt, huh?"

"Yeah, not half bad," Peridot responded while knocking on the replica Attack Pod. "It looks almost like the real thing!"

"That's because it is!" Squaridot proclaimed. "Well, partially the real thing. Do you know that whole Ship of Theseus thing? Well, I basically took what I could find of the original Attack Pod and replaced everything that was broken! In a way, I basically rebuilt it."

"Yeah, but how much of the original is still left, I wonder?" Zuli asked quizzically.

"Let's not get too deep into this." Laz stopped Zuli's philosophizing in its tracks before she knocked on the statue. "You sure this isn't going to turn on at any moment and go on a rampage?"

"Oh nonsense, I took very special precautions to ensure such a thing won't happen!" Squaridot exclaimed nervously before the machine suddenly activated. "Oh no."

"TARGET CONFIRMED; INITIATE ASSAULT." The Attack Pod droned as it fired away at its surroundings, causing nearby Gems to panic while Squaridot awkwardly shuffled away.

"No, wait, come back!" Peridot yelled as she chased after the Attack Pod.

"Wait here, Squaridot, we'll handle this," Lapis said as she flew up and followed Peridot to stop the Pod.

"So, very special precaution, eh?" Laz smirked at a very nervous Squaridot.

"I'm so sorry for all of this." Squaridot meekly apologized.

"Don't worry, squirt," Zuli cheered Squaridot up. "Hopefully, we can find some other form of art that won't start destroying everything in sight!"

--

Once Peridot and Lapis stopped the rampaging Attack Pod, they returned to training Squaridot in the ways of meep morps. This time, they sat her in front of an easel with a set of paints. "Okay, so what do you want me to do now?" Squaridot asked.

"Anything, ah doy!" Lapis advised Squaridot. "That's the beauty of painting; you can basically do whatever you want. Then again, the same goes for all kinds of art."

"Anything I want, huh? Then anything you shall get!" Squaridot declared as she got to work on her painting. When she finished, however, Peridot and the Lapides quickly noticed how familiar the smiling woman she painted was. "How do you like it?"

"Hate to break it to you, but that's already been done." Laz gave her critiques.

"But on the plus side, I love how you perfectly recreated it." Zuli added politely.

"Wait, you mean to tell me someone already painted this?!" Squaridot complained before she threw her finished painting away and started anew. "I must find something else to paint, something way more original!"

"Don't get so discouraged; you'll find your footing." Peridot calmed Squaridot's nerves before discovering that the other Peridot had now completed a painting of a human man with two pairs of his arms and legs superimposed on him and spread apart. "See, you're getting good at it!"

"Actually, I'm pretty sure I've seen that one before too," Lapis added while resisting the urge to laugh at the nude man Squaridot just created. "Try another!"

"Will do!" Squaridot declared before painting what looked like a massive tidal wave looming over three boats in a storm. "No!" she complained before throwing it away and painting what looked like a beautiful starry night. "No!"

"What are they doing?" Jasper muttered as she and White Topaz watched Squaridot paint the day away.

"Looks like Squaridot is painting." White Topaz observed. "Should we go help her? She's looking really distressed."

"Naw, this is something she has to do herself." Jasper coldly replied before walking away from her girlfriend. "Come on, Paz, let's check up on the rest of the entrants."

For what felt like hours, Squaridot accidentally recreated famous paintings only to throw them out and start again. Feeling increasingly discouraged, she eventually gave up and threw her pallet on the canvas.

"Hey, this looks good!" Lapis pointed out.

"No, this is exactly what Ross Roberts did!" Squaridot complained before throwing that canvas away as well. "What else can we do?"

--

Another kind of meep-morping that Squaridot attempted was sculpting, and she had Lapis and Peridot serve as her models. She hoped beyond belief that things would go right this time, that the Attack Pod wouldn't show up again, or she'd end up ripping off some other famous artwork.

"Good, good," Squaridot muttered to herself while looking over at Lapis posing with Peridot on her lap. "Not bad so far. Ooh, this is looking fantastic!"

"Maybe this won't fail this time," Laz said hopefully as Squaridot finished her sculpture and presented it to her models.

"How does it look?" Squaridot asked eagerly while presenting her finished product to the two Gems.

"Hey, not bad!" Lapis complimented Squaridot's sculpture, relieved that nothing will go wrong for once. "I really like how you captured Peridot's energy here."

"Oh, finally!" Squaridot sighed in relief when she realized something. "But I think it could be better."

"Oh lord, it's good enough!" Laz snapped at Squaridot's negative self-talk. "You did good enough!"

"Hey Laz, calm down!" Zuli tried to settle Laz's anger. "Though really, it's not like you're going to accidentally drop it on the ground and ruin it."

"Well, I am far more careful than that," Squaridot said while gently putting the sculpture down, only to step on it accidentally. "Great." She muttered disdainfully before walking away. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to deal with artist's block now."

"Squaridot, wait!" Peridot yelled and chased after the other Peridot. "You can't just give up that easily!"

"I'm not giving up; I just need new ideas!" Squaridot clarified and took a deep breath. "Would you like to know what I was doing after you saved me from the ship?"

"I don't know. What?" Peridot asked.

"I joined Black Rutile," Squaridot answered, much to Peridot's surprise. "No, it's not what you think! I was only with her for a few months before Hessonite found me! Let me explain. Initiate super wavy flashback effect!"

--

Almost immediately after being saved by the Crystal Gems from Hessonite's warship and being brought up to speed on Era 3, Squaridot was scooped up by Morganite during the early stages of the Rutile Rebels' formation to hopefully indoctrinate another victim of the Crystal Gems' oppression into their cause.

During their time together, Morganite helped Squaridot develop and master her ferrokinetic abilities, and they built many of Black Rutile's war machines and technology together, such as surveillance drones, dropships, and weapons of mass destruction. However, Squaridot felt that Black Rutile wasn't really fighting for the good of all Gems; she was just an angry bigot who refused to let go of her past.

"How has your training been progressing, 4E3M-7ZY?" Morganite asked Squaridot one evening while the Peridot was in the middle of meditation. "I hope you've been keeping up on your education."

"I'm doing well, Morganite," Squaridot answered. "Black Rutile's nuclear fusion device is almost done; we must make some final touches. Once it's done, we can finally use it to force the Decapodians into servitude."

"Excellent work, Peridot," Morganite said with a smile and a pat on Squaridot's head. "I knew we could put your genius to good use." Suddenly, security alarms began going off, signifying that an intruder may have entered the facility. "What's going on?"

"Morganite, we have a break-in!" a Ruby soldier declared from the other side of the room. "That Hessonite just laid siege to our base and is taking down every Gem in sight!"

"Her again?!" Morganite growled before she turned to Squaridot. "You stay here; I'll deal with her!"

"That won't be necessary, Morganite," Hessonite said as she suddenly appeared behind the renegade designer and prepared to strike. Still, Morganite thought fast and made Hessonite's sword collide with her Rejuvenator. "Stop what you're doing right now, and come quietly!"

"Never; she has come too far to give up now!" Morganite retorted before turning back to Squaridot. "What are you waiting for, Peridot? Leave now!"

"Wait, Peridot?!" Hessonite exclaimed. "Which Peridot?"

"Peridot Facet-4E3M Cut-7ZY." Squaridot reintroduced herself to Hessonite. "Fancy seeing you again, Hessonite. How have you been doing?"

"Ever since I helped Steven stop Demantoid and Pyrope, a lot of vigilante work fighting rebel Gems," Hessonite stated before knocking the Rejuvenator out of Morganite's hand. "Morganite was but one of the Gems I've been tracking down."

"Don't think about taking her away from me!" Morganite said while backflipping away. "This Peridot is but one of the innocent Gems that I saved from being brainwashed by the Crystal Gems, and I won't let you capture another!"

"I was not brainwashed!" Squaridot exclaimed. "They simply offered me a new life, and I simply turned it down for now."

"Well, what do you say, Peridot," Hessonite replied. "still willing to accept a second chance?"

"Don't listen to her; it's a trap!" Morganite begged Squaridot. "Just go away so Hessonite and I can talk one-to-one." She then pointed at Hessonite. "Just you and me and my GUARDS!" At Morganite's command, an army of Jasper and Amethyst guards burst into Morganite's chamber to assist their boss against the intruder. "Seize the traitor to the old ways!"

"One Morganite and nineteen Quartzes against little old me sounds like pretty bad odds," Hessonite observed just as Squaridot walked up beside her, wielding a pipe.

"Yeah, for them." Squaridot declared as the two charged into battle against the guards. "And by the way, call me Squaridot."

"If you say so," Hessonite replied.

--

"So, after defeating the guards and escaping, Hessonite decided to take me in as one of her sidekicks." Squaridot finished explaining her flashback to Peridot. "As you can observe, I didn't stick around long enough to absorb Black Rutile's manifesto, which leads us to today."

"Now, what does that have to do with our current situation?" Peridot asked. "And why didn't I hear about this before now, and yet this is being treated like this has always happened?"

"What I'm trying to say is that just like how Hessonite gave me a new approach, I need a new approach again right now," Squaridot said before a familiar voice began echoing through her mind.

"Oftentimes in art, you make mistakes, but they can also be opportunities to learn. I may not have gotten the painting I wanted, but I can still make something new out of it." Squaridot imagined a floating Ross Roberts head appearing on her shoulder, repeating the lesson he learned from his painting mistake before slowly fading away. "Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes, mistakes…."

"Wait a second, that's it!" Squaridot proclaimed excitedly. "I made so many mistakes today, but what if I can do something with all those mistakes?!"

"That's a stellar idea!" Peridot replied. "Where did you get that idea?"

"Just some voices in my head reminding me of what I heard earlier," Squaridot answered. "Been happening a lot lately."

"That's what we call using your head, Squaridot." A wrinkly green face with a male voice in Squaridot's head agreed.

"You have a good idea there." Another green face with a female voice added.

"WESLEY." A strange robotic voice declared.

--

Later that day, the art show had finally begun with Gems from all over Little Homeworld coming over to display the meep morps they spent that day creating, ranging from paintings to statues, photographs, and more; everybody had a method of art that they wanted to show off.

"And here we have this magnanimous statue dedicated to me." Black Rutile explained the bronze statue of herself holding one hand out while the other was holding the hand of Aquamarine as the two stood on top of Steven's dead body. "I consider this a monument to the idea of perseverance and how in the face of seemingly impossible odds, truth, justice, and a better tomorrow will always find a way."

"Oh, that's nothing; witness my statue!" Desert Glass proclaimed while making her sand sculpture of herself animate itself through her movements. "Try and beat that."

"Guys, this doesn't need to be a competition." Chest Rose said while she, Navy Rose, and Shoulder Rose demonstrated their meep morp, which was made up of various objects, all stuck together to make a collage. "I gathered up all the materials."

"So that's what happened to the trash bags!" Amethyst exclaimed, pointing out some of the items used for the Roses' piece.

"As for our piece, we'd like to show off pictures of all our previous adventures," Nacre said before she and the Black Pearl Brigade presented photos of their bounty-hunting adventures, ranging from their showdown with Mr. Manco on Sergione-29, meeting Sylvia Spectre, vacationing on Kyukanza, and many more.

"We truly had some glorious adventures." Braids declared.

"Some you may not have even heard of before, like this one," Cap added before presenting a picture of an adventure to the planet Yorha. "Sculder felt really at home here, but he had to choose between living among his fellow machines or sticking with us."

"But eventually, after we convinced the Yorhans to get off their shiny metal asses and help stop Andesine, they realized that Sculder's real home was on the Servant," Pony stated while the Pearls' robot companion Sculder gave a thumbs up.

"I simply painted this picture of a number 2 pencil for my artwork." Teal Zircon said before pulling a tarp off her painting of a pencil and holding a pencil in her hands to compare. "I don't know why I painted this, but it helped me remember that the most important thing in life is to use a number 2 pencil." She then angrily growled, "Number 2!"

"That is certainly a unique idea for art." Garnet raised an eyebrow. "Pearls, what did you do?"

"Our piece was far more refined than all of this!" Yellow Pearl boasted as she, Blue Pearl, and Volleyball presented a tribute to the struggles Pearls faced in the old days. "We dub this piece Little Rebellions. Carnelian and her Jasper friend helped us with this one."

"Thanks for giving us credit!" Skinny Jasper exclaimed as she and Carnelian clapped.

"Woo, go, Pearls!" Carnelian whooped.

"And finally, let's see what Squaridot did." White Topaz stated while turning to Squaridot, who replied by pulling off a tarp revealing an amalgamation of all her attempts at art thus far. Her paintings now decorated the arms and legs of the subdued Attack Pod, and at the top was her destroyed sculpture of Peridot & Lapis. "Ooh, this looks neat! What do you call this one?"

"I call my piece "Mistakes," after an epiphany I had from my continued attempts at meep morps." Squaridot explained. "I got it from an episode of The Wonders of Creativity with Ross Roberts, and he made a mistake just like me when making meep morps, but he could take it in stride because he says they can also be opportunities to learn. I may not have gotten the painting I wanted, but I can still make something new out of it."

"That is really profound." IQ gasped in awe as everybody started clapping.

"Not bad little Peridot, not bad at all." Tails agreed with IQ.

"Please, Holly, and could do better than that." Cat's Eye confidently stated.

"Don't get too cocky, Cat." Holly Blue advised.

"We're so proud of you." Peridot and the three Lapises said in unison.

As Squaridot began taking a bow for her efforts, she noticed Morganite standing among the applauding Gems, who then gave her an approving nod. The two may have parted ways, but Squaridot still saw that Morganite held some respect for her.

But hidden in the crowd, Black Rutile used the applause to further her devious plots. A quick trip with the Warp Pad allowed her to steal some Gem shards left over from the Diamonds' dismantling of the Cluster and the various Cluster experiments. In particular, Black Rutile got her hands on the fragments of a Phoenix Lapis Lazuli, an Emerald, two Citrines, and a Demantoid, which she knew would be perfect for adding to her forces and satisfying the needs of one of her subordinates.

--

I told you this would be shorter than usual. I mean, it's probably a given since the final two chapters of the series will probably be far longer. But on another subject, next chapter will be the last fun one before we get into the more serious stuff because we'll be heading to the Olympics! Well, not really the Olympics, those are far later in real life, these are basically the Olympics at home. I'm getting ahead of myself, see you next week.

[ottiliere]

oh my goodness your dios.. what a delight to see someone so fully invested in phantom blood dio wow. i am very happy. i love your 3D dios. really makes me want to sculpt him as well

Do it... clay is cheap bake it in the oven paint with 10 dollar set of acrylics your life will never be better. I adore phantom blood Dio so very much... years ago saw someone coin the term “phantom blood purist” and it's so funny I think about it literally every time I enter a Dio cycle. There are many aspects that go into this preference of course, and upon a great amount of time pondering i can say confidently that this is because mainly that:

1) I love history (especially the fin de siècle) and I love thinking about him in relation to Victorian values/etiquette/sociology in general... there's something so special about a society that enabled such a gross disparity of wealth&poverty while being so inherently pretentious that its asinine etiquette rules would completely elude you unless you were raised in an aristocratic family or had access to etiquette books. Dio absolutely read a great amount of these before going to the Joestar mansion btw, even before his father snuffed it I think. God help him he would not be doomed to look like a slovenly ill-bred gamin if and when he needed to manipulate the upper classes. I really can't think of a way for him to have developed these skills enough to outclass Jonathan otherwise. god and like thinking about him as a barrister too with his profligate fashion sense you just KNOW he gets drawn that way into all of the court sketches that go in all the newspapers since everyone loved to read about crime and there were a million papers for this in England alone... he'd get caricatured so bad sometimes and he is NOT happy about this.

2) You can probably tell from my indifference to the rest of the parts (except sbr; I call this the "diego rule") that I'm not the biggest fan of fantastical elements and I'm much more interested in interpersonal conflict/relationships in general... PB is extremely unique to the rest of the series because for five WHOLE chapters absolutely nothing abnormal happens and we just get to see Dio harassing Jonathan and his girlfriend until Jonathan snaps and humiliates him so bad in beating him up that he makes Dio cry. and then Dio kills his dog. Like it's literally just some impoverished child abuse victim bullying a spoiled rich kid who wanted to be his friend because lalala sunshine daisies only knows what "poverty" is from reading Oliver Twist and has no conceptual understanding of what the real-world implications of that are. That was the character development that needed multiple chapters to develop it's so fucking awesome. like yeah I'd read an entire novel of just this alone happening and how it impacts their relationship as adults no vampirism needed. I reread "dio the invader" so frequently I'm surprised the spine of my jojonium copy isn't cracked at the exact endpoint of it. I just adore him interacting with Jonathan so much it's hard to remove him from that… that's his FOIL... all the stories (some "AUs") I make with Dio involve the way he and Jonathan gravitate each other to some degree. we get the clearest view of who he is in the face of someone who is the polar opposite of himself. 🤯

2) This iteration of him is the closest degree of separation he has from his "humanity" (childhood), thus

3) I find him to be the most interesting, endearing, etc., version of him walking around, given that... well. behaviors stem from somewhere... the thematic & active severance of himself from a species he is fundamentally incapable of connecting with due to the way he adapted to help him tolerate his childhood... from his point of view I can't imagine that there is one convincing reason for him to continue being human after given the opportunity to deviate from it (despite likely still being inebriated when he vamped himself — very much an impulsive decision since he had, what, an hour or two to think that through? drunk?). If everyone's underneath him, yes, after the fact the choice seems extremely fitting. Maybe he'll cultivate a vast swathe of worshippers and disciples that obey his every command. Maybe he'll rule the world. And then, maybe, he will start to feel genuinely content for the first time in his life. But probably not. That's the drawback of having something fundamentally missing from within you.

4) He lacks a certain type of introspective awareness that 100 years alone in a box might enable him to develop... he's very animalistic to me and possesses a precarious/immature/nonexistent grasp on his emotions just given the fact that he exhibits enraged outbursts from perceived ego wounds (in both childhood and adulthood) + struggles with alcoholism due to an incapacity to self-soothe any sort of negative emotion that makes it past the self-aggrandizing filter he can't help but see life through; he really isn't in conscious control of anything happening inside of him despite needing control over everything and everyone so he can get exactly what he wants, and deserves, always. PB paints a very dim and pathetic view of his character by allowing us to see when he's most "vulnerable", which is the thing he likely hates being the most, so getting to see scenes where he's walking around publicly intoxicated and disparaging himself for acting like his father (implied: again), who he hates, and attacking men with a wine bottle for evoking the concept of his mother, who he also kind of hates but lacks the cognizant cogency to dissolve whatever cognitive dissonance is causing this mental incongruence, rules. he rules

tl;dr SDC dio is "iconic" but I feel like he misses a lot of the charm he had in part one, removed from the context of the society that had such rigid social boundaries and rules of decorum, in addition to his maladaptive approach to interpersonal relationships, his substance abuse issues, his humbling foil... he's too "cool" for me. In the end SDC dio is simply not my Dio... he is someone else's Dio. And that's okay.

[trixiwritesfanfic]

We'll Do It Right This Time

Chapter 1: Tensions Build In Castle Town

‘Oh my. Agatha. Agatha!’ A bespectacled girl with white hair clutched at her friend, who was currently examining the various oddities collected by a man wearing a beetle backpack.

‘Look, Lea, he has pinned Smotherwings…’

‘Oh, Agatha! This is much more interesting – look!’ A hand with meticulously painted fingernails pointed, rather rudely it must be said, at an entourage of tall, buff people. ‘There’s a Voe in among the Gerudo!’

‘A what?’

‘Voe! It’s the Gerudo word for a man, keep up, can’t you?’ A hand clasped around Agatha’s wrist and suddenly she was being dragged from her window shopping in search of a higher vantage point. ‘There’s an old wives’ tale that says they’re almost always evil and try to take over the world!’

‘You do talk the most wonderful nonsense, Lea.’

‘It’s true! My Grammy Josha told me so.’

‘Your Grammy Josha’s going batty. Can you slow down? I’m sweating and you know how my hair sticks to me when I sweat.’

‘Oh, you’ll be fine you baby,’ grumbled Lea, casting a quick look at the brunette’s highly coiffed hair. ‘A little bit of exercise is good for you.’

‘Not in heels it’s not.’

The bickering petered out as they raced through Castle Town, although for different reasons. Lea’s expression was focused and excited, while her Hylian friend’s was flushed with the combination of exertion and frustration. Finally, near the high wall that separated the castle from the town, they stopped, Agatha bent over and panting.

‘Why… can every Sheikah… run a marathon… at the drop… of a hat? What’s wrong… with you all?’

‘Wow, rude. We train, you know that. Shush, look, here they come!’

The approaching retinue consisted almost entirely of women; they stood head and shoulders above most of the townsfolk. There seemed very little height discrepancy between them, most of them at least 7’0” by Lea’s estimation – perhaps a specific requirement for bodyguards? There wasn’t even one among them who wasn’t sculpted as finely as marbled gods, and they travelled in a disciplined, marching formation.

In the middle, about a head taller than the women, a man who was similarly sculpted, though broader and liberally swathed in tribal markings. Similar traditions seemed to persist regardless of cultural identity – just as the Eye of Truth marked the strongest bloodline amongst the Sheikah, the tribal designs designated Gerudo royalty. It was a fascinating topic, really.

‘Why do you think he’s here?’ Agatha finally seemed to have caught her breath and curiosity had taken hold at long last.

‘Reaffirming alliances, maybe? I think this is the first Gerudo Voe born since the Great Upheaval; I wouldn’t blame our Queen for wanting to know he’s, you know. Not going to go the way of the last one.’

One of the Gerudo Vai had clearly heard her, for suddenly there were sharp green eyes boring into Lea’s very soul, a warning expression etched into the powerful features. The Sheikah girl’s entire face flushed, her Eye of Truth tattoo slowly blending into the pink. The moment passed relatively quickly, for the long, muscular legs of the group were swift and without hesitation.

‘…That was scary. I shouldn’t have said that so loud.’

‘Bet that’ll be awkward when you see them tonight at the technology presentation,’ teased Agatha, nudging at her friend’s ribs with a rather pointed elbow.

‘Oh, crud, I forgot all about that! I gotta go swot up or Cadoc will kill me! Talk later!’

‘We’re going to have a tough time assuring the people of Hyrule that Ganz has not received the soul of the demon king, Payu.’ The sharp-eyed soldier had turned to her partner in arms following the interaction, a disgruntled look on her face.

‘Yes, but you knew that before we came here. Why are you mentioning it now?’

‘Because it’s just become real, I suppose.’

‘Don’t worry, Nalani. You know how he is with people. I would not be surprised if their Queen is eating out of our Ganz’s hands in no time.’

‘Ladies!’ The man in question had taken a handful of bouncing steps, easily sweeping to the front of the formation. ‘You gossiping? Can I get in on that action? Or are we swapping hair tips?’ Ganz wore a broad, open smile; his eyes crinkled at the corners and twinkled excitedly.

‘If you have time for gossip then perhaps Kalana did not give you enough homework to do. And have you picked out an appropriate robe for your meeting with the Royal Family?’

‘Nope! But hear me out – we want my genuine self, right? No tricks, no games, just me. So why in the world would I shove myself into a stuffy formal robe which probably looks a lot like what the old tyrants wore when they came for their meetings, when I could just wear my traditional Voe outfit?’ A muscular arm had been draped around Nalani’s shoulder as he spoke, for she was the more likely of the two to argue against him.

‘That… is certainly an unconventional approach to a diplomatic meeting. What if you offend the queen?’

‘You realise she probably doesn’t like wearing those big fancy dresses either, right? I bet she wishes she could just chuck them all out and wear those tight little breeches the commonfolk have. What about you, Payu? What do you think?’

‘I’m not paid to have an opinion, your Majesty.’

‘Aw, bollocks to that, tell me how you really feel, go on!’ The other arm looped around Payu’s shoulders now, and Ganz pulled both women almost into his armpits. ‘C’mon, I can take it, I’m a big lad. Pluck my own eyebrows and everything.’

‘Okay. I think you’re right. The less thought you’re putting into your behaviour and appearance, the more I think you’ll dispel the various presumptions of the people.’

‘Course I’m right, I’m The Vai!’

‘Remember, Ganz, they’re more patriarchal here, you might not want to shout that.’

‘Our culture is important Payu; I’m not about to sacrifice that for anyone. I’m definitely The Vai.’

‘Okay, okay, you’re The Vai,’ she smirked, patting the wide forearm that protruded into her line of sight. ‘Now please, release me. We’re coming up on the guard outpost and I wish to be taken seriously.’

‘You seem tense, Queen Zelda.’

‘You have no idea, Robert. This meeting really ought to have occurred when both the Gerudo King and I were children. I know that my father was focused on restoring trade between Hyrule and Labrynna, but I really feel he did not future-proof as effectively as he should have. He knew there was a Voe born to the Gerudo and that there are fears of another calamity…’ The queen sighed, rubbing gingerly at the tips of her ears to soothe her nerves.

‘Mm. If I may, the Zoran people may have suffered immensely without the established fishing agreements. And the exploration and subsequent clearing of the depths would not have been possible without the various power rings and gloves of their smitheries.’ The scholar’s words rang true – Hyrule would not have been the same without those agreements. All the same, it would have been better, in her view, if they had managed to address the hypothetical reawakening of the demon king alongside reaching back out to their neighbours.

Well, it was too late for regrets now.

‘Do you know if the cleaning crew have finished with the history chambers? I should like to take the Gerudo King down there and illustrate for him what exactly I hope to prevent.’ Where once there had been carvings of King Rauru, Queen Sonia, and the Sages, further rooms had been built, and more friezes sculpted, depicting the events of the Upheaval. Daphnes the fourth, son of the princess of Upheaval, had bidden that the tale be preserved in something more durable than books, learning from the loss of generations past.

‘I believe they are doing one last pass. I shall send one of the kitchen lads to check on the process.’

‘Please do.’

With a quick click of his heels, an alternative to the usual low bowing that commonfolk often performed, her advisor acknowledged the request and then swept from the throne room, leaving Zelda alone.

It was nerve-wracking, just waiting here like this. Normally, she would have ridden out to meet their visitors, but the spirit of the hero had not yet presented himself to her, and she therefore feared to leave the comparative shelter of her fortress and its well-trained guard. It might have been a good thing, the absence of the hero – it spoke to a possibility that this particular Gerudo may not follow the unfortunate trend. Equally, however, it could simply mean he could snatch their world and crush it before anyone could stop him.

Her father’s decision to spare the child in his infancy had been an insurmountable gamble, and she could only trust his gut. No backup. No insurance. One man’s intuition could make or break the fate of her generation.

[i-fondued]

Ghost | Sinners in Secret - Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven - The Dance Incident

Pairing: Cardinal Copia x Reader/Sister of Sin x Papa “Terzo” Emeritus III

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Plot, smut, etc. See AO3 for full list of tags!

A/N: Don’t throw a shoe at me for the way this chapter ends, I swear I will update by Monday night!!

Chapter One - HERE

Chapter Two - HERE

Chapter Three - HERE

Chapter Four - HERE

Chapter Five - HERE

Chapter Six - HERE

Chapter Seven - HERE

Chapter Eight - HERE

Chapter Nine - HERE

Chapter Ten - HERE

AO3 Link - HERE

Terzo hadn’t been lying, Italy was beautiful. 

I was glued to the windows, watching the old stone homes and manicured gardens pass by as we traveled through the busy streets. In the distance I could see Vatican City, including the catholic church's headquarters. I thought about asking Terzo and Copia if we’d have time to visit but I thought back to what Imperator said and decided to bring it up another time. 

We seemed to be on the outskirts of the city where there were large homes and fancy cars. I watched as we followed a curving street as it followed a large stone wall before we turned into a little private driveway and up to a large ornate gate. On the gate was the seal of the satanic church, the grucifix proudly sculpted in an oxidized copper. There were two ghouls dressed in almost militaristic garb, a gun strapped to their hips mostly for show for the humans in the neighborhood. They took a quick look at the ghoul in the front seat and glanced at us three in the back before they nodded at us, opening the gate with a press of a button and letting us onto the enormous property. I couldn’t stop staring at the grounds as we pulled up to the expansive villa and monastery. Everything was a very traditional italian style, I felt like I had stepped into a renaissance landscape painting. 

“Terzo��this is incredible…” I couldn’t help the awe that was clear in my voice, he chuckled as he pulled my hand into his as Copia rolled his eyes with a small smile. “Do you know the history of this place?”

“Amore, this is one of quella della mia famiglia old homes.” He gestured to the approaching villa. “This one is not even the oldest or the nicest. There is one in Venice that overlooks one of the main waterways, è bellissimo in the summer.”

“I’d love to see it someday.”

“Before we leave Italia, we shall take you Sorella.” Terzo chucked, Copia nodding and leaning to press a kiss to my temple.

“There are many places Papa and I would like to take you before we leave, Stellina. We have some plans for you.” Copia’s voice was thick with unspoken promises and I couldn’t help but shutter. Both men chuckled at me. 

The driveway curved around in a circle as we pulled up to the front of the home of the Satanic Church. In front of the large villa were a few familiar faces and some new ones. There were four cardinals, two of which had been at the airport earlier, one who was a new face and Cardinal Veritas. In the center of them was a man dressed in a simple suit with a welcoming smile on his face. When the SUV stopped, the ghoul who had been driving came to open the door for us. 

Copia stepped out first, his eyes narrowing at Veritas before turning back to offer me his hand as I slipped from the backseat. Terzo, ever the center of attention, stepped from the SUV and gave a little silly bow. I rolled my eyes, Copia taking my hand and tucking it into the crook of his arm. We walked towards the gathered group as Terzo lagged behind us, telling the ghoul that was helping with our bags to bring everything to the papal suites. 

“Cardinal Copia! It has been far too long!” The man in the suit smiled, he was an older man with darker skin. A welcoming smile was on his face as Copia stepped towards him and shook his hand. 

“Saltarian, it is very good to see you again.” Copia’s face softened slightly and he gave the other man a genuine smile. “It is very nice to be back home.”

“We are happy to have you, Copia. You know you’re always welcome here Cardinal.” Saltarian said, his eyes moving from Copia to me. He offered me his hand, taking mine and kissing my knuckles. “This must be our Prime Mover, yes?”

“This would be the one, Saltarian. Her blood was tested by Papa Emeritus II, I have brought the notes and her file with us for the council for review.” Copia cut me off before I could reply as Terzo finally joined us, taking my hand and tugging me to him. Copia started to pull out the files that Imperator had given him before I was able to stop him. “Shall I hold on to them for now?”

“I-Uh…I say hold onto them for now…”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Saltarian Sir.” I chuckled, reaching out to shake the older man’s hand, Copia seeming oblivious to the other man’s reaction. 

“Welcome to Vatican City, Sister. I’m sure you’d like to settle in. Why don’t you follow me and we can have a little tour?” He laughed, gesturing for us to follow him. “Gentleman, we’ll convine the Council tomorrow. We will see you later this evening.”

The cardinals beside Veritas nodded vaguely and bowed to Terzo before disappearing down a gravel path towards what looked like a large chapel space. Veritas unfortunately stuck with us, only a step or two behind Saltarian. As we made our way into the sprawling villa, Saltarian pointed out various objects and tapestries. My little historian heart soared with all of the relics and old objects that they had on display. The whole building was made of stone, the floors of swirling black marble, and the ceilings high and decorated with ornately carved wood beams. There were many open air archways that faced sprawling courtyards, some of the hallways had nothing but gothic imagery apon stained glass. 

A part of me was desperate to come back in the summer, when a warm breeze would blow through the open air as we moved from the main villa space, where the siblings worked and learned and had meals, to the separate wings of the monastery that the siblings and clergy called home. As we walked down the hallway where at the end was an enormous stained glass window that depicted the fall of Lucifer from the heavens, the hall split into left and right directions. 

“Papa, we had taken the liberties of having the Papal Suites readied for you if you follow me. You each have your own room should you need it.” Saltarian turned from the large window and smiled as he waved us to follow him. 

“Saltarian, Sir. I hope you don’t mind, I hadn’t thought to mention it till now. As I understand it, the congregation in the States that you came from do not have segregated quarters for men and women, correct?” Cardinal Veritas’s voice was sickly sweet as he turned towards the three of us, a wicked smile on his face as he looked at me. 

“What is your point, Veritas?” Copia’s voice was low, nose upturned as he made an attempt at looking down at the taller man. 

“Well I had assumed Sister would be staying in the Sisters of Sin quarters…” Veritas made a vague gesture to the other hallway, I saw some other sisters coming and going from the rooms with curious looks at us newcomers. “I took the liberty of getting her rooms ready, she would be next to the head Sister.”

“She will be staying with me, with us , Cardinal.” Terzo’s voice was deadly serious, eyes dark as he put a possessive hand on my waist. 

“My apologies, Your Eminence. I was not made aware there would be an exception to the rules…” Veritas was looking at Terzo, arms behind his back with a smirk. I’d never seen anyone in the clergy size Terzo up like this and I was so shocked I didn’t even have anything clever to say. He leaned in close to whisper to Terzo as Saltarian spoke to Copia quietly. “Though you always did have a fondness for rule bending in your favor…”

I felt Terzo stiffen beside me, his hand gripping me tighter as he scoffed at Veritas. Terzo struggled to calm himself, I could see him almost shaking with fury in the corner of my eye. 

“Fareste bene a ricordare anche con chi state parlando, Cardinale…” You would do well to also remember who you are talking to, Cardinal. Terzo’s voice was deep and gravely, a shiver shooting down my spine. I could have sworn I saw his white iris shimmer in his fury. “Potresti avere un po' di influenza con il consiglio, ma ricorda chi è il responsabile qui…” You may have some leverage with the board, but remember who's in charge here.

“Papa…” Copia’s voice was calm, his hand resting gently on Terzo’s shoulder and pulling our attention away from the increasing tension between the Terzo and Veritas. “Ora non è il momento…”

“Sister isn’t just a sibling, Cardinal Veritas. She is going to be our Prime Mover, she will be senior clergy after all! It is customary for the Prime Mover to stay in the Papal Suites.” Saltarian spoke, tone soft as he stepped into the hallway that led to our rooms. “Come, let me show you your rooms. Cardinal, why don’t you go check on the dinner preparations? I’ll meet back up with you in my office after. ”

Terzo led me away from Veritas, barely looking back at the other man. My eyes however were drawn in and I locked eyes with him before turning back to look at Saltarian who was speaking warmly with Copia. The blond had a curious look on his face, halfway between fury and desire. 

“Are you okay, Terzo?” I mumbled quietly, giving him a playful hip check to try and lighten his mood. 

“I’m fine, Amore.” His tone made it very clear that he was anything but, however I knew better than to try and pry it out of him right now. 

“Here we are.” Saltarian stopped in front of a pair of French doors, Terzo’s personal grucifix crest mounted on the doors. He pushed the doors open and I was taken aback by the design and decor of the space

Where most of the villa we had seen was done in dark woods and traditional renaissance styles, the Papal Suites were light and airy. Light woods and cream fabrics were everywhere, with accents of gold and silver inlays in the tables and chairs. We stepped into the main suite living room, widows all along the back wall facing the sun brought in tons of light. On the left was a massive fireplace that had a merry fire roaring, a set of couches angled for perfect conversations. To the right was a small office space with a desk, it seemed like it was more for formal show than any work. There were a few bookshelves as well, filled with books, and a little reading nook in the corner. Behind the desk was a large set of sliding doors that opened out to a private courtyard that had a small path that seemed to lead to the main path outside that led to the Church hall. 

Down the hallway to the left was a small bathroom and two bedrooms, both of which had their own private bath. There was also a small kitchen and a good sized dining room with a large ornate dining table. To the right was another hallway that led to a massive master suite, complete with a bathroom that rivaled even my own at home. After I finished my quick inspection, I joined Copia on the couch while Terzo directed the ghouls on where our bags were to go. 

“I’ll let you three get settled in. Feel free to make use of the grounds and the villa. I just ask that you join us for a formal meal this evening, drinks and dancing after for the senior clergy.” Saltarian spoke, waving us off as he headed for the door with his hand in his pocket. “I’ll see you then!”

Once the ghouls left, Terzo came and flopped on the couch and laid his head in my lap. I sighed, taking his sunglasses and tossing them on the coffee table, rubbing his tense shoulders. 

“Well…that all could have gone worse with our track record.” I joked, both men giving me a disbelieving look. “What?”

“Not funny, Amore.” Terzo grumbled, his hand pinching the bridge of his nose. “Quel topo bastardo vuole combattere.”

“Who? Veritas?”

“Si.”

“What is his problem anyways? The looks he’s been giving me have been downright creepy.” I grumbled, looking to Copia for answers but his gaze was locked on the crackling fire. 

“Cardinale Veritas is…” Copia started to speak but Terzo sat up abruptly and flung his hands in the air, practically foaming at the mouth. 

“He is a jealous cad, he does not respect anyone he sees as beneath him.” He fumed, standing and pacing in front of the fireplace. “I do not want you alone with him, Amore…I do not trust him.”

“Papa…” Copia’s voice was steady but there was a warning passed between them.

“Don’t Cardinale…” 

“She deserves to know the truth.” Copia said simply, my head whipping back and forth between them feeling completely left out. 

“Se le dico la verità, le farà male. Non voglio ferirla con quanto sono stato stupido in gioventù!” If I tell her the truth, it will hurt her. I don't want to hurt her with how stupid I was in my youth! Terzo snapped before huffing and storming for the doors leading out to the courtyard, slamming the door behind him. I jumped and looked at Copia, brows furrowed. 

“You better tell me what is going on…” I sighed, crossing my arms and crossing my legs under me on the couch. “We need to all be on the same page with the council meeting tomorrow, we need to present as a united front.”

Copia sighed, taking off his biretta and leather gloves before tugging my legs into his lap. I slumped against the arm rest and he began to rub my feet. 

Copia did as I asked. He told me everything. 

When they were young and Terzo had come to study at the villa when he turned eighteen, he grew close with Copia and Veritas because they treated him like another person and not a future Papa. Copia told me stories of their summers in the Italian countryside, raising hell and learning ritual lessons. He told me of one time they had snuck off, stealing Nihil’s old car and drove to the seaside to play hooky from lessons and spend the day by the ocean. I watched as Copia got lost in the memories, something that clearly he had been doing all day, and I couldn’t help but curl up closer to him as he spoke. 

He told me of when the day came and Terzo was expected to ascend after so many years in Italy. Papa had known there was an empty Cardinal spot he was leaving and the Clergy had requested him to make a choice of who would take the spot. 

“He picked you didn’t he?”

“Si, Stellina.” He sighed, running his bare hands through his hair to push it away from his face. “To this day, I do not know why he did. I had been just a Black Priest at the time, known for my translations and skill with meticulous rituals. Nothing special. Veritas was furious, he had thought himself more charismatic than me which made him a better fit for the role.”

“I can’t imagine you being uncharismatic, Copia.” I teased him lightly, pulling a small smile from his face. 

“Ero timido da giovane, I barely had the courage to speak with a Sister half the time.” He laughed, turning his mismatched eyes towards me fondly. 

Copia continued with their history. He told me that when it had been announced they needed a cardinal to report to our abbey back home, Copia had once again been Terzo’s first pick. Veritas had hoped to take over the head Cardinal position Copia was leaving vacant but apparently Terzo had insisted Copia take the role with him over the Atlantic and instead Saltarian had filled in the position. 

“A work rivalry is what caused all that?” I questioned, brow knitting together and Copia actually took a second to look embarrassed before continuing.

“Ah..no, Amore. There is always more to the story, si?”

“Why do I have a feeling I’m not going to like where this is going.” I grumbled, Copia smiled sheepishly before continuing. 

No, work rivalries were not the end of it. 

Copia told me about Veritas’ sister. Apparently when they were young, Terzo and her had been very close. Copia skirted around some details I could tell, but he had said that there was talk of her becoming Terzo’s unofficial Prime Mover. When they discovered my selection, she and Terzo had broken things off. That had been several years ago after I had first joined the Church.

“It was that serious..?” My heart clenched painfully, looking out towards where Terzo had stormed off. I couldn’t imagine what would have happened if I hadn’t been discovered as a Prime Mover, would I have ever grown so attached to Terzo?

“It was just a rumor, Topolino…” Copia’s voice was soft as he cupped my chin and turned me to look at him. “You had always been fated to be ours, hellsent for us.”

“Is she why you both don’t want me to stay in the sisters quarters?” 

“It is part of it, si…” 

“What’s the other part?” His sudden hesitancy made me suspicious as he refused to look at me. 

“Amore…” 

“Spit it out Copia.” 

“Papa and I have…earned a reputation over the years we spent here with the sisters. Neither of us wanted you to find out from them about our…histories.”

I huffed and stood up dramatically, Copia jumping slightly at my sudden movement. Checking the clock over the mantle, I knew I had a few hours before I needed to get ready but I needed some space. 

“Sorella..?” Copia’s voice was concerned but I held my hand up to him before I spoke.

“I understand you both had lives before we all became entangled, just like I’m sure you know I also had a life before the abbey. It’s another thing to have that knowledge be something that could derail our entire relationship.” I rubbed my eyes before sighing and storming towards the master suite and its fabulous bathroom. 

“Amore?” Copia called after me. 

“I’m not mad you two had a slut stage, I’m just mad it wasn't just with me!” I called back, I could hear him laughing in the other room. “I’m going to take a bath. Alone!”

…

I felt slightly better after soaking in the tub that easily could have felt another four people in it. 

When I came out of the bathroom I started to dig through my bags to try and find something I could wear. I hadn’t realized that formal meals here in Italy were truly formal events. Copia had been sitting on the bed waiting for me, I paused when he stood and played with his hands. 

“Amore…” He started but I cut him off. 

“What are you wearing?” I asked, mouth practically hanging open. 

Copia was wearing a suit of sorts. He wore a black leather tailcoat over a black vest and button up shirt. On the left and over his heart was a beaded grucifix, ornately detailed with beads and various colored threads. His trousers were sinfully tight, leaving very little to the imagination. His hands had his normal black leather gloves, his hair slicked back slightly and he didn’t wear his biretta. 

He looked like some sort of gothic romance character and I felt like I was drooling. Copia looked at himself with a puzzled look before shrugging at me. 

“What do you mean, Stellina? I am wearing my formal outfit, no?” He asked, gesturing towards the piles of clothes around the room where I had torn through my bags looking for something to wear. “What about you? You also need to get dressed.”

“I don’t have anything appropriate, at least not if everyone is dressing that formally.” I groaned, tugging out a few different linen dresses. “What am I going to do?”

“Nonsense, Topolino. The other siblings will be dressed in their uniforms, a little more formale than yours but nothing that will make you stick out too much.” Copia tried to comfort me as I panicked, my thoughts instantly on the senior clergy who’d be attending. 

“Maybe I can make it seem like I’m extra pious by wearing the simple habit and robes?” I groaned, burying my face in my hands. A soft knock on the door drew my eyes up to the slightly subdued form of Terzo; hanging over his shoulder was a long black garment bag.

“I…hope you do not think it too formal of me but…well I had a feeling you did not have something appropriate to wear tonight, Amore…” Terzo seemed sheepish as he walked over and laid the bag on the bed. 

Slowly I unzipped the cover, a gasp slipping past my lips as I pulled the heavy gown from the bag. The dress was made of a dusty dark blue velvet, almost black in particular light. It had a high neckline, fitted at the waist and a long flowing skirt with a slight train. The back was almost completely open, the neckline tying around my neck. The dress also had bishop sleeves with the sleeves becoming fitted from my forearm down, with pearls stitched to look like stars. All along the chest were more pearls sewn sporadically, the ends of the necktie that would brush against my back covered in pearls. 

“Terzo this is…it's too much.” My voice wavered, thick with emotion, looking over to him as he stripped down and grabbed a towel from the rack. 

“Nonsense Amore.” He laughed, waving me off as he came to press a soft kiss to my temple. “You are il mio tesoro, you deserve the world and I will give it to you.”

“Let me help you, Sorella…” Copia’s voice was thick as he looked at me with heated eyes. “Papa, you must hurry and get ready as well.”

I felt Terzo pull away, heading into the bathroom, before Copia helped me into the dress, fabric heavy as I slipped the sleeves on. Copia helped zip up the little invisible zipper, pressing a kiss to my bare back. I shuddered, turning to look at him through my eyelashes. 

“Positivamente squisito…” His lips murmured into my skin as his hands settled on my waist, pulling me back against him. “Maybe we should just have dinner here, si?”

“While it's very tempting…” I sighed, eyes closing in bliss as he continued to press kisses to my shoulders and neck. “We have the Council to face tomorrow and I don’t think skipping out on dinner would win me any favors…”

“No, I suppose you are correct.” He chuckled before stepping back, obvious discomfort at the snug trousers crushing his manhood. “Finish getting ready, I will meet you in the main room.”

I quickly did my hair, pulling it up in a simple bun with a few curls uncooperative and settling along my neck. I kept my make up simple, mostly because I was never good with make-up in the first place. I slipped on the earrings Terzo had tucked into the bag, a pair of small dangling grucifix, and the pair of black heels. I tested them a few steps, satisfied I wasn’t going to break an ankle. Once I was done I followed Copia’s lead and went into the living room where he and I waited for Terzo. 

“Ah, Amore. You look incantevole, I knew that blue would be a good color for you.” 

I turned to look back at Terzo, a smile on my lips, and I felt like I was going to swoon. Terzo was dressed like he had just stepped from a Jane Austen novel. 

He wore a high collar, double breasted black tailcoat. His black undershirt had a clerical collar, the little white band standing proudly. He wore his normal white satin gloves, his insignia ring on his right middle finger. His trousers, much like Copia’s, were sinfully tight and were tucked into a pair of knee high riding boots. His papal paints had been touched up and his hair slicked back, for the first time I noticed his ears were pierced. In one he wore a black diamond stud and on the left he wore a grucifix earring, matching the ones I was wearing. 

“I-I think this is the first time I’ve seen either of you wear something besides your uniforms…” I giggled awkwardly, squirming under the weight of their eyes on me. “I-It’s a nice change.”

Terzo’s face softened as he came and took my hand, giving me a chance to spin for him. He whistled low, pulling me to him and pressing a gentle kiss to my temple. 

“Tesoro, I will dress like this every day if it pleases you…” He teased before taking my arm. Copia came to my other side and took the other. “I’m sure Cardinale feels the same way, Si?”

“Only if Sorella dresses like this every day…”

“I’m not sure how the Siblings back home would feel about that.” I laughed as we made our way back to the dining hall we had been shown before when we arrived. 

As we made our way down there we ran into several siblings of various ranks, all of them welcomed us with a mumbled “Your Emenceces” and a bow or curtsy. I was thrown off that they were including me at first, till I remembered just who I was striving to become. I was determined to live up to the task Lucifer himself blessed me with, standing tall as we walked with my head held high.

When we arrived at the dining hall I couldn’t help the shock on my face. The space was very large, several long tables set up following the length of the room and under the massive set of stained glass windows on the far end of the hall was the head table. All the tables were set with white linens, polished silverware and large centerpieces of exotic flowers. 

“Ah, our guests of honor have finally joined us.” 

I had to hold back from rolling my eyes as we turned towards Veritas. He was dressed similarly to Copia, in a form-fitting suit, however his was made in a deep red fabric and he wore his biretta. His hair was pulled back at his temples again, the pieces braided together. I put on my most diplomatic smile, extending my hand and giving him a cool look till he took it and kissed my knuckles in greeting. 

“Cardinal Veritas, I apologize. I’m not sure if we were ever told what time dinner was.” I attempted to smooth things over as I could feel the dark looks on my companions faces. “Let us sit.”

Terzo took my arm back, giving Veritas a dirty look as he guided us to the head table. Copia pulled out my chair to Terzo’s left hand, helping tuck the chair in for me. Terzo sat in the center spot at the table, Copia on his right and I on his left. On Copia’s other side was Saltarian who began to happily chat with him, both seeming to be caught up in catching up together. On my right side was Veritas, which I had to fight the urge to tuck myself closer to Terzo. Veritas stood, clinking his glass and calling the attention of the siblings who seemed to scurry to their seats.

“I propose a toast. To our most auspicious Papa.” Veritas’ smirk deepened as he nodded at Terzo before locking his gaze with Copia. “To our clergy head, Cardinal Copia.”

My throat tightened as his eyes looked to mine, his face looked kind but the dark glare at me conveyed what he didn’t say. 

“And finally, to our prospective Prime Mover. May Lucifer himself bless you and your bindings, should you choose to take them.” For some reason that felt more like a threat than a toast, but I tried to wipe the grimace from my face and sip my champagne. “Papa, would you like to say a few words to your most dedicated flock?”

Terzo choked slightly on his drink, a scowl on his face for a split second before he attempted to recover face. “Ah, Si. Si Cardinale.”

He stood, clearing his throat and holding his glass up, looking out over the large dining room. I looked up at him lovingly, trying to encourage him with my smile. 

“Ah, buona serata everyone.” Terzo shuffled slightly, a few kind responses of ‘Good Evening, Papa’ sounded across the room. “I thank you all for joining us here and for welcoming us with open arms.”

Terzo looked over at me and with a cheeky smile, I gave him a warning glare to which he winked at me. 

“A toast to Saltarian’s generous summoning, resulting in my little vacanza italiana. To Cardinal Veritas for his lovely toast; and most importantly to mi compagne, il mio primo motore, mio amato. Long May She Serve.”

A chorus of ‘Long May She Serve’ rang out, much to my surprise. I heard Veritas scoff to my right side as I glanced at Terzo with a dirty look. He smiled, reaching out to caress my cheek before turning back towards the siblings seated in front of us. 

“Please, enjoy your meals. Let us offer thanks to our Dark Lord.”

Terzo spoke a quick Latin prayer, many people’s heads bowed as they mumbled along, and Copia and I caught each other's eye. The Cardinal shrugged at me, both of us thrown off by Terzo’s more subdued approach at leading a meal prayer. He sat back down and instantly I knew something was off, he kept making small talk with me and drawing my attention away from the siblings as they ate their meals. 

I was tense throughout the whole meal whenever I wasn't speaking with Terzo. Cardinal Veritas’ eyes were constantly lingering on me and he took every moment I wasn’t speaking with Terzo to cut in and make some sort of snide comment. 

“Ah, Sister. I don’t mean to pry but I was curious what you normally do for tasks at your abbey.” His voice was thick with sweetness, a few of the Cardinals on the council sat to his right side and I didn’t want to be rude with tomorrow’s meeting. 

“I work in the library.” 

“Ah, Cardinal Copia was always such a big fan of the library here. Did he help you get reassigned to that position?”

“Um, no. I had always worked in the library since I had joined the Church. I’ve always had a talent for languages, when I proved I had a skill for Latin translations they had me start working on the translation requests.”

“Most impressive, Sister.” One of the other cardinal’s nodded, sipping his wine as he listened to me speak.

“Thank you, Cardinal.” I smiled, nodding demurely at him. “Since I started doing translation works, I’ve been entrusted with very old ritual translations and various documents and journals of clergymen and the Emeritus family.”

“What about your ritual experience, Sister?” Veritas’ voice was smooth and I had to fight the urge to roll my eyes. “You must know how important that particular skill would be if you become the Prime Mover.”

“I wasn’t aware I was on trial here, Cardinal Veritas.” I said sweetly, my smile practically dripping with sarcasm. 

“Forgive me, Sister.” He clearly didn’t catch or chose to ignore my icy tone. “I’m merely curious what drew Papa to your side, and Cardinal Copia for that matter.”

“Who says I drew them in?” I almost snarled, placing my silverware down and shoving backwards in my seat. “Please excuse me, I need to get some air.”

Copia and Terzo both instantly looked in my direction, concerned on their faces. I waved them off with a small smile. “I’ll be right back.” I mumbled to them and they both seemed to settle down. 

With my skirts swishing behind me, I slipped out of the dining hall and down to where the restrooms were. I stood in front of the marge mirror on the wall behind the sinks, gripping the edge tightly as I took some soothing breaths. I knew I couldn’t lose my cool here. There not only was too much riding on this going well but I knew if I made the wrong move or miscalculated a step, I would lose one or even both of the men I’d grown to love. 

I took a moment to splash some cold water on my cheeks, face flushed from the heat of the thick fabric of my dress. I heard a toilet flush and someone come out of one of the stalls, standing straight and putting on my best Imperator face. 

The other woman was tall and willowy, her face sharp and elf like. Her hair was long and pin straight, a buttery yellow shade. She wore a dress like the other siblings. It was a similar robe to what I wore back home but in a silky material with a high slit. Instead of a traditional habit she wore a sheer veil, her hair slightly covered. 

“Oh, my apologies, Sister.” She startled slightly, hand over her heart. “I didn’t hear anyone else come in after me.”

“No, I’m sorry.” I smiled as she came over and washed her hands before checking her makeup in the mirror. “I just needed a minute away from the hall, I don’t tend to do well in the spotlight.”

“Unfortunately, you may be in the spotlight a little longer. Dancing and drinks after dinner means more so networking for the Cardinals with Papa.” She laughed before giving me a small bow. “Where are my manners? My name is Caterina, I’m the head Sister of Sin.”

“A pleasure to meet you Caterina, I’m…” I started to say before she looked back at the mirror and cut me off. 

“I know who you are, Prime Mover.” Her tone turned slightly icy as she looked at me out of the corner of her eye. 

“Oh.” I mumbled, cheeks blushing as she looked me up and down with a critical eye. “I should probably head back…”

“Of course, you wouldn’t want to keep Papa waiting. He never was the type to wait patiently.” She smiled sweetly as she floated past me as my brows furrowed. “Please enjoy your stay here in Vatican City.”

“How do you know what Terzo is like?” I turned to ask her but she had already left the bathroom. 

…

“Ah, Cara Mia!” Terzo’s cheeks were flushed slightly with the wine he was drinking, dinner plates had been cleared while I was gone and dessert was being served as I joined the table again. “I was just about to send Cardinale to go and find you.”

“I’m fine, just got sidetracked is all.” I mumbled absentmindedly as I scanned the crowd for Caterina. She was seated at the Sister table closest to us, smiling and laughing with other senior siblings. My eyes narrowed slightly at her and I took a deep sip from my glass. 

“Amore?” Terzo’s voice was quiet as he leaned towards me as he spoke. “Stai bene?”

“Everything is fine, Terzo.” I brushed him off, trying to smile to reassure him. “I think the jet lag is finally catching up with me is all.”

“We can skip the after party, Tesoro.” He said, placing his hand on top of mine. “I’m sure the Cardinale would understand if you needed to rest before the big meeting tomorrow.”

“I’m fine, Terzo.” I sighed, eyes still watching Caterina’s movements as I sipped my wine. “I don’t want to give the Council a poor perception of me.”

“Whatever you wish, Amore.” Terzo withdrew his hand and leaned over to speak with Copia while I simmered in my seat, racking my brain to who this woman was to Terzo before.

“Ah, Sister. Welcome back,” Veritas’ voice was the last thing I wanted to hear and I had to hold back a groan. “My sister told me she was very pleased to have time to chat with you.”

“What?” My head whipped in his direction, eyes narrowed on him.

“Sister Caterina, she is my sister.” He gave me a smirk, gesturing with his head to the object of my irritation. 

Before I could formulate a response, Saltarian stood and dismissed the siblings and ghouls. He invited the senior clergy to follow him to the function room down the hall for some after dinner drinks and dancing. While he spoke, Veritas slipped away and joined his sister who locked eyes with me and smirked at me. Now seeing them standing together I couldn’t believe I was so dumb as to not recognize the resemblance, they could have been twins. 

“Sorella?” Copia’s voice was soft as I turned to look at him, hand outstretched to me. 

I graciously took it, standing and letting him tug me close as we waited for Terzo. He smiled sheepishly before taking my free arm and tucking it with his. We walked the three of us, following the other Cardinals and Saltarian to the room a few doors down from the dining hall. This space was far more intimate, about half the size of the dining hall. 

The back wall was almost entirely stained glass, the other walls had various works of art hanging on the walls. The space looked like it was normally used as an art gallery but someone had added in some cocktail tables, a small bar and a small quartet that had started playing music. The majority of the room was made of us older clergymen, many sitting and chatting amongst their brothers. However there were several younger members and Sisters mixed in. A few were paired up in couples and looked eager to start dancing. 

“Ah, Amore. Finally a chance to show off my dance skills.” Terzo teased, leaning in to murmur in my ear. “Though I doubt there will be much thrusting.”

“Papa who says you get to dance with Sorella first, eh?” Copia purred, tugging me towards him. “Last time I checked, one of us got formal training.”

“Come Cardinale, true dancing is not something you learn in lessons. It is something you do con emozione, si?”

I was distracted, nodding along as my two overgrown ten year olds teased and taunted each other about dance lessons. My eyes were following Cardinal Veritas and Caterina around the room. She dazzled, public speaking seeming to come to her naturally. She knew exactly who to act like a pious nun with and who to flirt a little with. 

She didn’t laugh too loud or go on too long about Latin translations than the conversation called for. I wasn’t sure if it was that I’d had too much to drink or if my mind was being particularly cruel to me tonight, but I couldn’t help but wonder if Lucifer had made the wrong call. Coming back from my mind wandering I could tell Terzo and Copia were still arguing about who would get to dance with me first. I couldn’t help the little small fond smile as I squeezed their arms and pulled them slightly closer to me. 

“Topolino?”

“Amore?”

“I’m glad you are both here with me.” I mumbled, cheeks flushed at the tender looks on their faces. 

“Sasso carta forbici?” Terzo suggested, Copia nodded before the threw out their first instinct. 

“Fanculo!” Terzo cursed. He’d chosen rock, Copia had thrown out paper. His face was far more smug than normal as he tugged on my hand, pulling me away from Terzo. 

“Fair is fair, Papa.” He teased while Terzo fliped him off as he pouted. I laughed, reaching to cup his cheek. 

“You can have the next one, Terzo.” I soothed before Terzo reached out and pressed a kiss to my bare wrist. I shivered at the lusty look in his eyes.

“Amore…I will have your last dance of the evening and every evening if tomorrow goes our way.”

“Papa, the Cardinals would like you to open the dance floor.” Veritas’ voice called out as he waved us over. I had to fight the growl back as I saw him standing with Caterina. “It is tradition after all.”

“Well, scusami Cardinale. I was hoping to sit the first dance out…” Terzo trailed off, looking at me as Copia gave him another smug smile. I rolled my eyes. 

“Nonsense, the first dance must be by Papa. If Sister is already occupied, you must pick another partner. May I suggest Caterina?” Cardinal Veritas crooned, practically shoving his sister into Terzo’s arms as he stepped toward the dance floor. 

Terzo looked at me helplessly as Caterina led him out onto the floor while the strings struck up a twinkling melody. Copia followed suit as Terzo began to swirl around the dance floor with another woman in his arms. I felt the rage bubbling in my chest as I watched him as Caterina tried to step closer towards Terzo but he maintained perfect form as they waltz around the floor. Caterina’s skirts billowed out as they twirled, a seductive smile on her face as she spoke lowly to Terzo. I couldn’t make out what they were saying and my heart clenched in my chest at the thought. 

“Stellina?” Copia’s voice was deep as he pulled my attention back to him. I smiled as my cheeks flushed, embarrassed at being caught. “Will you join me?”

“O-of course, I’m sorry I’m not all that great at dancing.” I mumbled as he put his hand on my waist, holding my hand delicately as I placed one on his shoulder and the other in his open palm. “I didn’t have much time for dancing in my life before all this or even the church.”

“I will make up for what you lack in experience, Amore. Just let me lead you, yes?”

“Yes, Cardinal.” He smirked at my use of his formal title before we began to follow the simple one, two, three of the beat and spun around the floor. Other guests had begun to pair up and follow in our steps, Terzo still in the center of the floor with Caterina. 

“You are distratto, Amore.” Copia murmured into my ear as he twirled me around, my dress ballooning outwards before swishing around my legs. “It couldn’t be because you are gelosa, no?”

“Me? Jealous? No, of course not…” I chuckled embarrassingly, cheeks flushed. “What would make you say that?”

“If you keep glaring at Rina like that, Sorella, she will burst into flames.” 

“Rina?” I narrowed my eyes at him, he had the decency to look sheepish. “I didn’t realize you were close with her either…”

“Amore. We grew up together here, it was so many years ago. Lifetimes ago.” He said, eyes growing warm with fondness as he took in my flushed cheeks and pulled me closer to him. He pressed a soft kiss to my hand he held in his own. “You were hell sent for us, Lucifer himself hand picked you. Papa knows this, I know this. Why would either of us look to vecchi amanti when we have a goddess awaiting us every night, hm?”

“Copia I…” I mumbled, face flushed even more as he spun me out dramatically before pulling me even closer to him. “I trust you, both of you. I just don’t trust her, there is something she is planning I can feel it. Something to discredit me.

“We will handle it, amore, together like we promised.”

The song came to a close, Copia dipping me and I couldn’t help the little giggles as he pressed a kiss to my forehead before helping me back onto my feet. 

“Let us go get a drink, Si?” Copia smiled, tucking my arm into his as we started to head towards the bar. That was till an arm snuck around my waist and pulled me backwards. 

“Not so fast, Tesoro. You promised me your second dance.” Terzo purred in my ear as he tugged me towards the dance floor. “That drink can wait.”

“Terzo!” I laughed as he pulled me close, his hand warm on my bare lower back even with his white gloves on. “Slow down, I’m going to trip.”

He had a wolfish grin as he began the dance, twirling me with more style than I thought I could keep up with. He held me tenderly, pulled closer than other dancing couples by far.

“I would not let you fall, Amore.” He purred, hand sliding to allow his pink to slip into my dress, brushing against the bare skin of my ass. Terzo groaned, leaning forward to rest his forehead against mine. “Non indossi biancheria intima, piccola?”

I gave him a wicked grin and shook my head no, I heard him curse under his breath as hand pressing me against him as we twirled. 

“Sarai la mia morte, Amato.” He growled, pressing a warm kiss to the inside of my wrist. “I want to take you back to my rooms and make you beg for me.”

“Say the word and we can ditch this party, Papa.” I purred in his ear, his hand holding mine tensed up like he was fighting the urge to just drag me from the room. 

“Let us finish this dance, get a few drinks, and I am sure nobody would notice if we went missing, si?” He hissed in my ear, taking a pause in the steps to press his hardening cock against my thigh, a shiver running up my spine. “I’m sure Cardinale would join us too.”

My heart soared, I had forgotten in my melancholy that Terzo wanted me just as much as I wanted him. He hadn’t been tricked or forced into this just because I was a prime mover. My mind wandered back to all the moments in the early mornings he had held me, tangled limbs and sweet words between us. My cheeks flushed as I thought about all the times he’d praised me while he gently rocked against me or when he would fuck me till I couldn’t see straight. 

I’d always known there was the unspoken truth between us. The longing looks in the hallways, the notes I’d find left on my workstation in the library, the times he would mumble into my skin after we’d curled around each other and chased our bliss in the other's body. While later I was sure I would place the blame for my confession on the amount of wine I had drank earlier that night, I surged forward knowing tomorrow all of this could be taken away from me. I didn’t want that to happen before I was able to tell Terzo the truth. 

“T-terzo..?” I mumbled, suddenly shy.

“Si?”

“I…I…IthinkI’mfallinginlovewithyou.” I blurted, looking to the floor as we twirled one final time. The dance coming to a close, we paused in the middle of the floor as the couples around us politely clapped. Terzo stood there, mouth slightly agape, with his eyes locked on me. “T-terzo?”

He didn’t say anything, surging forward and pulling me into his arms. His fingers tangled in the loose curls at the base of my hairline as he kissed me firmly. I let out a squeak of surprise before my hand came to rest on his warm chest. Terzo tilted my head, cradling it gently as he pulled away. His mismatched gaze was heated but soft as he smiled a genuine grin. 

“I thought you would never say it, Amore.” He sighed. “Ti ho amato dalla prima volta che ti ho visto giurare il tuo servizio a Lucifero con mio fratello.” I've loved you since I first saw you swearing your service to Lucifer with my brother.

“Terzo, people are staring…” I squirmed, feeling the eyes of the partygoers on us, Terzo was unfazed. 

“I love you too, Sorella.” He continued, tugging my hand as he lead me to the side. I grinned like an idiot, cheeks flushed and eyes feeling like they were going to water any moment. “Let them stare, I do not care. Tonight calls for celebration, for tomorrow we do not know what will happen.”

…

Terzo and I celebrated a little too much. 

Copia had been speaking to Saltarian off to the side, I wasn’t sure what was going on but I was so caught up in my post-confession high I didn’t think to seek him out. When he did come and find us he looked relieved for a moment before taking in the sight of Terzo and I curled up on a sofa; the two of us drunk off our asses with wandering hands and giggling like children. The good news for us was that the party was winding down, most of the older clergy had already gone to bed. There were only a few siblings, Cardinal Veritas, Copia, Saltarian, Caterina, Terzo and I left. 

“What has gotten into you two, eh?” He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose but I could see the small warm smile he tried to hide. 

“We are celebrating!” I cheered, throwing my hands up and almost falling from Terzo’s lap. Copia surging forward to catch me by my arms. 

“Celebrating? Festeggiare cosa?” Copia turned to Terzo who, while he looked more sober than I, was plastered. 

“Sorella finally admitted what we all knew, that she is completely in love con me.” He crooned, hand possessively coming to my neck which caused me to shudder and lean into his touch. “Il che significa che ho vinto la scommessa, Cardinale.” Which means I won the bet, Cardinal.

“È così, fratello?” Copia’s eyes were locked on mine, a dangerous heat in them. I squirmed under the weight and tried to look away. “Is that true, Sorella…hm?”

“Well I…I didn’t want to go into tomorrow without being honest with you both.” I mumbled, cheeks flushing as I was finally able to tear my eyes away from him. 

“Hm. I see.” His voice was low, I felt two fingers slip under my chin, tilting my head back to lock eyes with him. “ed io? Cosa provi per me, principessa?”

“I…I…” I stuttered, eyes glassy as I took in Copia kneeling in front of me, his eyes dark and stormy with a smirk on his face. “Fuck.”

“Hm, fuck indeed Sorella.” He chuckled.

“Well now if I say it then it feels like it's not special.” I whined, unable to help the childish pout that popped up. Copia chuckled darkly, taking my hand and tugging me from Terzo’s lap.

“Come you two, it is time for bed. We will have a long day ahead of us.” He sighed, tugging Terzo onto his feet as well before leaning in between us to mumble for us. “I have many ideas on how to punish you two for leaving me out of this confessionale, hm?”

Terzo and I locked eyes and both had stupid grins on our faces as we followed Copia obediently through the halls. It was quiet besides the sound of our shoes on the marble, I was still drunk and I couldn’t help myself to fill the silence. 

“Terzo?”

“Si, mio amore?” 

“If she touches you again, I’m going to rip her hair out.” I said sweetly, stepping into the double doors of our suite. Copia burst into laughter, smacking my ass as I passed him on the way in. 

“Who?” Terzo looked confused as he slightly slurred his words, I glared at him with my hands on my hips. 

“Caterina, Terzo.” I hissed as I kicked off my shoes and stumbled my way to the bedroom, Copia and Terzo hot on my heels. 

“Amore…I’ve never seen you like this…I like it.” Terzo purred, hands sliding around my waist and tugging me to him. 

I felt his cock hard against my ass and I whimpered as I ground back against him. Terzo leaned to press sloppy kisses to my neck as he untied the velvet ties there. The dress slipped forward slightly as his quick fingers pushed the sleeves down my arms. I arched into his touch as his hands slid from my shoulders to my waist where he was able to quickly undo the zipper. The heavy gown fell to the floor with a thump and Terzo, ever the gentleman, helped me step out of it. I was standing in his arms, naked. 

“Do not encourage her Terzo.” Copia’s voice startled me, my eyes opened and I noticed he was standing in front of me. “Sorella is a good girl, no?”

He had removed his gloves, I could feel his fingertips dusting against my skin as he cupped my aching breasts. His thumbs brushing against my pebbling nipples, I arched into his touch and whimpered as Terzo’s hands gripped my hips roughly. He tugged me back against him, rutting his cock against my ass. I could feel how hard he was though his tight trousers. 

“She is always a good girl for Papa, Cardinale.” Terzo murmured in my ear as I panted, Copia leaning to nip and suck at my collarbone as I shuddered between them. “Come, Sorella. Show your papas how good you can be, eh?”

Oh sweet Satan, I was going to die tonight

[inkabelledesigns]

Anyone who knows me knows I'm never done crafting, and last night was no exception. I finally have the courage to start a project that's had me nervous for ages. Four years ago, I began my journey into the art form of doll customization, and it all started with one doll, Twisted Alice Angel. Malice was a huge turning point for me, I dove into a bunch of different mediums with little clue what I was doing and made something unexpected. Nothing compares to the excitement I felt holding her complete in my hands for the first time.

Time has not been kind to Malice, the way I made her has not held up, and while I wanted to wait for five years to redo her, after fixing Sammy last year, I couldn't leave her like this. So we stripped everything down and started from the ground up. We're off to a good start, I'm actually sculpting her face deformities this time! Quite happy with them at this stage, a little paint and they're sure to shine. ^^ I haven't made her halo yet as I want to attempt polymer clay for it, since I feel like I have more control over that.

My concept is actually a little different this time. I really want to put her in a ballgown, to match the glamorous look of the ballroom in Chapter 4. It's got some Phantom of the Opera vibes that would be fun to play with. I've got some feathers I'd like to find a way to include as well, that would be cool, have a wing motif somewhere in there. Hopefully we can pull it off!

But that's not all. We also have Henry! I've been saving this Jurassic World Owen doll for ages to use for Henry, and I've been putting it off because I don't have any sewing patterns for him. Well, recently in a Mercari purchase, I got a doll that came with this shirt, and it fits him perfectly! If I can rough it up with some black paint and find where I put his pants, we could totally start on his project. Seriously, you have no idea how much clothing gets in my way. X'''D I fear it. His face is smaller than I'm used to, but I'm excited to work with it. Also, I think it's hilarious that this doll is of a character played by Chris Pratt, so in some ways, we now get Henry Stein played by Chris Pratt, which is just, an extremely amusing meme. X'''D

So yeah, I try to do a BATIM project each year for Halloween, and these are my plans this year. It's okay if they don't happen on time though, Malice I expect to take longer. XD