#AND AND ANNE IS QUEER AND THEY HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE ALSO PRETTY MUCH QUEER AND LOVE THEM THE WAY THEY ARE

[sieglinde-freud]

let it be known that i love prince inigo with my whole soul. however sometimes it is SO much fun to think about owain and his two most loyal-est knights you ever seen: worst guy in the world #1 and worst guy in the world #2. i love retainer inigo and severa so much. retainers who bully you and make fun of you and trash on you but they’d leave behind everyone and everything they ever knew to follow you and protect you in a whole new universe. they love you so much that they’d swear allegiance to total strangers but that loyalty pales in comparison to what they’d do for you. and they were all lovers!!!!!!!

[alexwilltellyouthings]

Entirely self indulgent rating post about the top 10 TV shows that made me fucking insane for some reason

10. Sense8

God, this was so good. Such a blessing. I saw part of the cast during a Pride Parade and it's one of my favorite memories. I felt every possible emotion with this show, I love it.

9. The Last of Us

This is kind of a cheat, because the obsession comes from the games, but it is what it is. It's one of the few games that had a big impact on me and I closely relate it to my relationship with my dad. Can't wait to cry my heart out at season 2.

8. Good Omens

It's a given, isn't it? That stupid angel with his stupid demon and their stupid God. GRRRAAWW. A lot of thoughts and feelings came from the fandom, I have to point out. It's been very nice.

7. The Umbrella Academy

I have the first issue of the comics autographed by Gerard Way!! I mean, yes, it's because I'm a MCR fan, but it became even more precious after I got into the show. I'm rewatching right now, preparing for the last season. I'll be a mess when I say goodbye to them. Can't even really think about it too hard or I'll cry right now.

Continues under the cut

6. Our Flag Means Death

LISTEN THIS CHANGED EVERYTHING TO ME. What do you mean we can have a show THIS queer? It's all I want now. I ate it up. I smiled so much. I wanted this so badly and had no idea.

5. Interview with the Vampire

Feels like it should be top 3 honestly but I'll get there. This is also a cheat, I've been reading the Vampire Chronicles since I was like 15. Growing up with Anne Rice probably messed me up but hey at least I have great taste. And seeing them on screen? The way they made it BETTER? And Lestat?? Who has been haunting me for 15 years on and off??? And the second season and their reunion and and and?????????? I'm STILL insane about them and will be forever, I'm afraid.

4. Doctor Who

Listen. Listen. Okay. Yeah. What can I say? If you get into it, you're doomed. And I have been doomed for 10 years at least. I stopped watching for a while and got back last year, and it hit me all over again. I love this dumbass genius alien in a way that's calm, even. Just a permanent part of who I am now.

3. The Untamed

The year was 2022, it had been a while since I had a proper fixation and I didn't think it would happen with this danmei live-action, but then came Wei Wuxian. Guys, if I tell you I fell in love. Couldn't stop thinking about him. Everyday I was plagued by his smile and red ribbon and tragic backstory, yadayadayada. I really like other characters too, and their stories, but WWX did something to me that I still don't quite understand.

2. Queer as Folk (US)

This was a looong time ago and it didn't really persist over time like the others, but it was my first actual obsession. I was clinically insane over these gays. I had no one to talk to about them, so for every episode I wrote several pages of notes to comment to my (only) friend at school the next day, the poor thing. It was pretty much all I talked about because I spent EVERY MINUTE we had to talk going over the notes and explaining the episode. Like, between classes, during breaks, everything. Months of that. She held on firmly because she was a good friend, but I'm aware it must've been terrible. Like I said, insane.

1. Dead Boy Detectives

Maybe I'm putting this up here because it's my current hyperfixation? Maybe. But I don't think I have felt something hit as strongly as this since QaF over there. This time I can participate in fandom so I don't need to write every thought I have because it's all a big talk anyway, but I'm still pretty much having those thoughts all the time for *checks notes* nearly three months. I'm writing more than I have in years. I'm back at Tumblr after I don't know how long. I'm staring at GIFs over and over like I have the fucking time for that. I'm distracted at work daily. I talk about it in therapy. I have the main cast's notifications on. I'm getting involved in fandom discourse sometimes even knowing I shouldn't. It's a nightmare. I love it. I love them.

If you read all of this, congrats! Now you know how my mind works, kinda!! I'm open to talk about any and all of these shows. It's amazing how they mess us up. It's also scary, but anyway.

[booksrbetterthanpeople]

🏳️‍⚧️Happy Pride From the Recess Class!🏳️‍🌈

Akuma Class

Science Kids

Austin A: Legally Blonde, but Gayer

Gender nonconforming, who has time to narrow down pronouns?

Does everyone’s makeup before Pride with Kendra and Victoria

Dyes his hair pink

Gives free haircuts, paints peoples’ nails, and dyes hair using spray-on dye

They just want everyone to look fabulous, is that so wrong?!

Dresses in only flag colors

Uses his mom’s credit card to buy binders for people

This is the only time of year he makes people simp. Not the other way around

And they are going to use it to their advantage

Dresses her chinchillas in drag

They. Look. Gorgeous.

He somehow escapes the Glitter Wars unscathed

Todrick Hall is her anthem

Austin B: Gaymer Gurl

AroAce and He/Him

Wears Croc Heelys to pride

He wanders off a lot, and it terrifies his boyfriends best friends

Brings Elizabeth III to every pride and dresses her in only the finest fashions

He buys her all sorts of pride-themed cat toys because she’s worth it

When people ask him on a date, Elizabeth III hisses at them

Casually getting adopted by drag queens after he casually tells them about his home situation

He’s granted entry to any drag house when he wants to get away from his “parents”. He’s got six moms now, and he will steal jewelry for them

He met a little girl with yellow eyes like him and she hugged him

All of Marceline’s songs are his anthems

Austin Q: Secret Mom Friend with Mommy Issues

Questioning & He/?

Tempted to put a leash on everyone

Especially Austin B because he won’t stop wandering off!

Austin Q: WHERE ARE MY BABIES?! Have you seen a little bitch in yellow glitter pants?! He’s a little ho, but I love him!

He supplies the snacks Austin T doesn’t make. He’s the main apple slice supplier

He also makes sure to bring apple juice. He just likes apples. “They’re good for you, Armsy!”

Cosplays as every redhead character- Penn Zero, Vicky, Melissa Chase, Mary Test, Black Widow, and more

He joins the muscle-flexing contests and wins a couple

Can carry Austin A, B, and T on his shoulders

Once again, everyone thinks the four of them are a poly couple

Austin Quinlan, Protector of Lesbians, Wielder of the Sapphic Sword, Kicker of Protesters’ Balls

Knows how to do a badass rainbow kick

Austin T: OUT OF THE WAY! I AM VERY GAY!

Gay & He/Him

Bakes all sorts of pastries for everyone and it’s pretty much the one thing everyone looks forward to

Seriously, this boy brings like twenty containers full of cupcakes, cookies, and pancakes (For the pansexuals, of course)

Not even protesters are immune to his cupcakes. But because he’s petty, they only get plain vanilla with no toppings

That’s how disappointed he is in them. Now they feel as though they’ve disrespected every deity

The drag queens, dykes on bikes, and just lesbians in general will kill for this baby

Casually name drops his parents any time a protester screams in his face

He and Jean reenact scenes from Phantom of the Opera

DJ threw a glitter bomb at him, and no one was safe

Wears Huggycake like a boa because she loves all the people, and she scares off homophobes

He met other reptile queers and now they’re having brunch

Lotta Jameson: Kick Buttowski, Queer Daredevil

Aromantic and She/Her

Gerard tinkered with her Vespa, and now rainbow glitter shoots out the pipes

Do NOT give her sugar. Seriously

She somehow sneaks onto floats

Austin Q: Lotta! Get down from there!/ Lotta: Be gay, do crimes!

Brings a baseball bat in case of transphobes

She has a shirt that says so

She did a bike jump over the protesters and dropped bags of glitter on them

Now she’s getting called Amelia Earhart by literally everyone

She got the aviator goggles and they’re pretty sure Amelia is a queer icon… Also, she sometimes goes missing in the crowd. She’s so short!

Austin Q: WHERE’S MY OTHER BABY?! SHE’S THE LITTLE GINGER BITCH IN GOGGLES!/ Lotta: Do you call all your babies bitches?

Kendra Anne Gunderson: Casually Spider-Man Kisses People… With Consent

Polyromantic and She/Her

Kendra is a bit of an icon

Known by all as “Hand-Stand Girl” because she walked only on her hands for the entire event

She has two drag queen uncles and her cousin is a beauty influencer in the queer community

Every time Kendra breathes, a lesbian meets her perfect match

Her eyeliner is on point

DJ lowers her down from buildings so that she can kiss pretty people… With consent, of course

Those two are always getting into some sort of trouble

They spray painted some transphobe’s car and put an egg in the slightly open trunk. It stunk up the car for days

When she’s not pranking protesters, she’s on the mom friend squad with Austin Q and keeping Austin B from wandering off

DJ Detweiler: The Drag Jester

Genderfluid, Bisexual, and He/She

Owns an assortment of pun shirts for every sexuality. No one knows how they come up with them

DJ: I came out to my dad./ Mason: DJ, NO!/ DJ: He told animal control he had a bison in his house!

Always accused of starting the Glitter Wars. She ain’t denying anything

As the name implies, he’s gonna prank the protesters and TERFs

So far, he got a TERF to sit on a whoopie cushion, tricked some dick trying to force himself on an Ace girl into kissing a frog, and made some homophobe think his foot went missing

Heads to drag clubs to do standup, and is probably gonna get a Netflix show when she gets older

DJ: Do you know the difference between a government bond and a homophobe? The bond matures.

Now he’s booked for seven shows throughout the month

He’s got a laugh like Sardonyx that makes people (Especially Mason) simp

Any time DJ laughs, a trans boy gets his soup

Austin Spinelli: Sneaking Out in Ballet Flats

Achillean and He/Him

Casually flirts with any guy he comes across

And he lays the Italian accent on THICK

Dresses in pinstripe suits and says he’s the boss of the Velvet Mafia

When he’s not in suits, he’s dressed in his ballet gear and doing ribbon dances

His splits are flawless

Any time Spinelli does a pirouette, a trans girl gets her wings

Any time Spinelli does a pirouette, a transphobe gets punched

When he’s got the time, and he always does, he does chalk art with the kids, and creates a literal mural

He’s always got time

The organizers loved his work so much, they commissioned a mural for a youth center

Knits beanies for everyone

Gia Griswald: You Ask, I’ll Tell

MtF Trans and She/Her

Her dad went with her to her first pride, and none of the protesters wanted to mess with the six foot tall military general war hero

Gets into flexing contests

Wears rainbow camouflage to every event

If she sees a scuff on your combat boots, she’s gonna clean them

Helped Gerard write his queer history book

In a club with other queer history buffs and they reenact iconic poses from history, but make them gay

She attended a military funeral with her dad during June, and the soldier being burried was a lesbian

Immediately, a bunch of freaks who probably stalked them went to protest. Gia flipped some bastard over her shoulder

Roger Raincomprix, the arriving officer, didn’t see a thing

She eats a crap ton of marshmallows

Victoria LaSalle: Queers on Wheels

Asexual, Bigender, and He/They/She

Decorates her wheelchair with all sorts of pride stickers

Rocks it every year in a crop top

Starts every glitter bomb fight. No one ever sees them coming

She’s just… She’s a goddex

Everyone wants to get a selfie with him. That’s how gorgeous he is

Out of everyone’s leagues

Teaches kids in wheelchairs how to pop a wheelie

Likes to answers kids’ questions

Kid: Are you a robot?/ Victoria: … Yes. Yes, I am.

Only Gerard has the privilege of sitting in his lap as he cruises through the crowd

Gerard Grundler: The Gay Genius

FtM Trans, Pan, Polyamorous, He/Him

He’s written a mini-pride history book with Gia. They got publishers lining up and everything!

Everyone is just so pretty

He bails during the Glitter Wars and takes cover in a coffee shop

Victoria’s gotta keep him from wandering off and possibly joining a cult because the members are pretty

Probably hacked into the medical system so people can have better access to hormones

Faints any time he sees Victoria in a crop top

Dresses in a lot of pride flag sweater vests no matter how hot it is

Victoria: Gerard, it’s ninety-/ Gerard: SWEATER VESTS RULE!

He builds robots to wave pride flags in sync

He and Rochelle protect the bugs

Mindy Blumberg: Opera is Gay as Fuck

Demigirl, Panromantic, They/She

Sings “Rainbow Connection” in an operatic fashion, and leaves everyone in tears

Carries Gia on her shoulders

She carries everyone on her shoulders, but mostly Gia

Will act as a human shield during the Glitter Wars because that’s how much she cares.

But the second Austin T gets his hands on a glitter bomb, she’s out

Hayley Kiyoko is her anthem

If you ask, they’ll hug you

Mindy gives amazing hugs

Everyone will die for this girl

Also, she’s weirdly poetic. It makes everyone wanna listen to her for hours

Is a pacifist, but she’ll give it to you straight if you mess with her friends

Rochelle Weems: That one person at pride who takes pictures of the protesters screaming at queer kids and posts them online for everyone to see

Demigirl, Polysexual, Ze/Zir

Brings zir Polaroid to make a scrapbook and blackmail protesters

Ze’s a rat, but a good kind of rat. The kind who makes sure homophobes and transphobes don’t get away with yelling at queer kids

Was self conscious about zir back brace until ze saw a drag king wearing a bedazzled one

Was roped into letting Austin A, Victoria and Kendra do zir makeup

Ze looked gorgeous!

Ze and Austin B share the good gossip with drag queens

In exchange, they get tickets to shows

Will kill for Austin T’s cookies

Just don’t let zir have too much sugar, otherwise ze will go crazy and start a cult based on cookies where everyone wears Cookie Monster bathrobes

It’s happened once before, and now ze’s under surveillance

Protects the bugs from getting stepped on and then places them in protesters’ hair

Ze saw this one guy about to take a swing at a lesbian, and promptly kicked him in the balls

Now ze’s got twelve new numbers in zir phone

Mason Ewing: The Most Organized Person At Pride

Bigender, Asexual, He/She

Brings a binder filled with horrific facts about conversion therapy to throw in the faces of protesters

Will talk the ear off of any protester about why they’re wrong about everything until they just walk away

Gets carried by DJ on her shoulders

Somehow knows where everyone is at all times

He teaches Rochelle how to walk in pumps and ze teaches him how to steal thirty candy bars

Brings sarcastic coffee thermoses

Paid Gerard to make her coffee maker battery operated, and now she brings it everywhere

She just pins an asexual flag pin on her tie and calls it a day. Though, if DJ asks, she will wear a pun shirt

DJ is the only one who knows how to make her laugh, and Spinelli’s taking bets on who will ask who out first

Beck King: Cosplays As Frida Kahlo

Nonbinary, Achillean, They/Them

The responsible chaperone when M. Grotke’s out of commission

Dyes their unibrow rainbow

Silently flirts with guys using eyebrow language

Cosplays as Clone High Frida Kahlo and the original Frida Kahlo. They just like Frida

Just casually flexing their muscles in front of hot guys, nothing going on there

Then the hot guys write their phone numbers on their hockey stick

Spinelli’s mentor in ‘The Way of the Achillean’

He makes crowns for kids

Any time a protester tries to attack them, they just suddenly disappear

People swear they’ve see men in black drag protesters away from Beck

Seriously, it’s like this guy’s got a whole security detail!

Alonzo Grotke: I Went to the First Pride, and All I Got Was This Brick

FtM Trans, Gay, He/Him

A well seasoned gay

Has a shirt that says “Papa Gay”

He’s total DILF getting hit on by every silver fox. He ain’t complaining, and they sure ain’t complaining when they get a look at his abs with that crop top

Seriously, this guy is ripped

The parade paused when one of the floats got a flat, and he just… He just made a whole bunch of guys simp by changing a tire, that’s all they’ll say

He’s the one keeping people at gay bars from getting roofied by creeps

Teaches meditation at the youth center

He gets hit on by the single dads, A LOT

Back in the day, he stole a police motorcycle and painted it rainbow. He passes out autographed copies of his mugshot because it’s such a good photo

His kids went to spy on his date with M. Monlataing and he pretended he didn’t notice

He passes mini water bottles to protesters since it’s ninety degrees out and he doesn’t want them dying of thirst despite everything

But, he does it with this smirk like, “Looks like I’m the bigger person here, losers. Namaste.”

[missyourflight]

some stuff i read and watched in june:

interview with the vampire (s2): very fun to have a fandom to feel wild about week to week again! blessed to have a show where every character is a hot beautiful queer vampire and they're all in love and do terrible things to each other! thankful to have an outlet in my irl friend who's been a lestat girly gn for decades! i read hardly any books or saw any films this month bc i was reading thousands and thousands of words of armand/daniel fanfiction instead!

hit man: liked this a lot but didn't quite love it, glen powell very fun and charming, delightful to see sexy leads with chemistry, austin amelio from everybody wants some!!

snack shack: gabriel labelle yr a star etc, never say no to a bit of nineties nostalgia

the bikeriders: very romantic!

the caine mutiny court martial: i already saw the friedkin one from last year, obviously this is the altman one from the eighties for eric bogosian reasons lol (see above re: iwtv spiral etc). pretty good and very theatrical! baby peter gallagher also there as the opposing counsel! eric bogosian very good at talking and not very convincing navally which is part of the point!

now, conjurers by freddie kölsch: really don't read much ya these days but this was fucking excellent, the last part in particular was so well built and epic and scary and sad and romantic. teen witches with a dead friend! excellent!

private rites by julia armfield: julia is my friend and i love her and she is just stunningly wildly talented! king lear's queer daughters in an apocalyptically flooded world! bad families! romance! cults! water! fisting! she can do it all!!

experienced by kate young: i love a romance set in a british city outside london, this one is about bristol lesbians and it does that tremendously satisfying romance novel thing where the person you want to be the actual love interest does in fact turn out to be the actual love interest

the vampire lestat by anne rice: very fun to do on audio, excited to see sam reid do some of this stuff in s3, because i'm me i was grasping all the horrible gremlin armand content with both hands

the green road by anne enright: read this book about a county clare family reunion while i was in county clare for a family wedding, i have a somewhat slippery relationship with my irishness but i love the west coast and the crashing atlantic specificity of this book, also the new york chapter is a marvel

[sleepystede]

15 QUESTIONS FOR 15 FRIENDS

thank u thank u thank u to these absolutely sweeties who tagged me: @soupbtch @ofmd-ann @gentlebeardsbarngrill 💖

ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? My mom was playing volleyball in the early days of her pregnancy and one of the opposing team member's name she loved so much, said she'd never heard it before, and named me it. I grew up in a small town and there were two other people with my name in my grade. Sad for me. However, I nicknamed myself as soon as I could talk and have never gone by my legal name (except professionally 🤪). Also I named myself after a bug sooooo who's the real winner here 🪲🪲🪲

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? This morning i listened to a podcast about community care and queer platonic love using bell hooks work as the foundational text and it made me cry happy tears of gratitude for the growth I've had in my own life. I do cry fairly easily, especially over beautiful things, the joys of being alive, that sorta thing.

DO YOU HAVE KIDS? No no. I have one precious adorable perfect nephew and he is everything I could ever desire.

WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED? I grew up playing soccer til I broke my nose and knocked all my front teeth out! I'm a big ping pong fan (I was the reigning champion two years in a row at math camp 🤓)

DO YOU USE SARCASM? sorry, who is she?

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? I love fun and unique hairstyles, tattoos, kind eyes

WHAT'S YOUR EYE COLOR? Dark brown, when I was born, you couldn't distinguish my iris from the pupil because they were so dark. They've lightened a bit over the years.

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Never been a scary movie fan, but a happy ending isn't what I seek, either. I love a good melancholic storyline and ending 🖤

ANY TALENTS? I'm a typebusker - I take my 1943 typewriter with me to events and write people poems on demand ✨️ I also love fiber arts of all kinds!

WHERE WERE YOU BORN? tiny lil farm that's been in my family for 7 generations

WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES? DMing and playing DND, quilting, weaving, hiking, film photography, collaging, finding new ways to explore poetry and art, playing the banjolele

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? nah I grew up with a herd of dogs but I move around every few years and travel a lot, which has made having pets difficult over the last decade. I have loads of plants tho!

HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5'3 on a good day 👑

FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? three way tie between anything art related, creative writing, and physics (like how creative and dreamy is physics??? It was the only thing that challenged me and I even started to study it in undergrad!!)

DREAM JOB? I have a pretty dreamy job that's values-aligned, flexible, remote, creative, and fun! It's pretty high stress and I'm always working tho, so something less intensive that let's me travel more would be ideal 😎

no pressure tagging (sorry if you've already been tagged and I missed it!!): @edscuntyeyeshadow @1989edteach @edsbacktattoo @merryfinches @lovely-letters-for-ed @saltpepperbeard @sherlockig @bizarrelittlemew @sweet-little-goldfish-stede @sonnetforbonnet

[mcalhenwrites]

The main characters of Rascal are Hazel and Ferdinand, a couple in their mid-20s who practice a domestic discipline relationship. Hazel is the second oldest child in the wealthy Raston family. His sister, Opal, is married and expecting a child at the beginning of the story. His parents are Edith Anne and William aka “Willie the Rascal”. All recent generations of Rastons have been called Rascals, but Hazel is also a rascal of a sub. Ferdinand is the only child of Randolph and Tillie Aletto. He grew up in a “paycheck to paycheck” sort of household. Other characters include Sinclair, Ruth, Celia, Frey, and Avery. Frey is Eugene Glasser’s son. He is not in SGH, but Avery is. I love Sinclair. He’s a mischievous character who loves to tease Hazel. Sinclair can’t lie. Even worse, he will blurt out thoughts when he’s excited about them. You had best hope if he catches you doing something wrong, he forgets. It’s unlikely, though. Sinclair has since learned to make a lot of jokes and exaggerate statements, which makes it harder for people to know if he’s serious or not. That still gets him into trouble in other ways. Celia is a former neighbor whose husband Sal passed away. She lives in a countryside home with her parents now that she’s a widow, but she will appear in the story later on. Celia is a reserved type with strictly traditional parents, and she hates living with them. They harp on her about getting remarried. They never really knew Sal or they probably wouldn’t have liked him after a while. He was a fun guy. They just though he was a “respectable scientist”, but he was an affectionate nerd and openly bisexual. (Celia is also bisexual, but in a very closested way due to her unfortunate need to rely financially on her parents, since she was brought up to only be a wife instead of given any educational opportunities.) Ruth is a lesbian who teaches art and makes art of her own. Unlike Celia, Sinclair, Hazel, and Ferdinand, she’s much older. The “elder queer” of their friend circle. She has a busy schedule and is extroverted. Ruth is a bit of a troublemaker, but she’s also sensible. There isn’t anything she doesn’t have an opinion on. Yes, she probably will vocalize that opinion. Then there’s Opal. Wife goals tbh. Opal is fun and counters Sinclair well. This is a woman who has an excellent poker face and uses it frequently. She’s joking? No one can tell. She loves to make absurd statements to freak people out. If Opal has something she is working toward, she goes after it with fierce determination. She is unstoppable and always thinks several moves ahead. Opal and Hazel had an okay relationship as children. Hazel had moments where he was a brat to her–often out of petty jealousy–but they mostly got along. They were never super close, nor were they the children who bickered endlessly. She’s Willie’s favorite child, but that’s in part because Hazel and Willie fight all the time and have very little in common. While she has always been a Daddy’s girl, her father would have doted more on a son whose interests aligned with his own. Opal is the one who is stepping up in Willie’s company while Hazel tries hard to pull away from his father’s clutches both financially and emotionally. Hazel distances himself from Opal due to this closeness. In adulthood, he thinks she looks down on him. The truth is that she’s one of his biggest supporters. Willie works on the automobile industry and is great friends with Otis Odelli. The Raston company makes parts, and Willie invests in many faucets of the transporation industry. His friend, Otis, uses some of these parts for his cars, which are grossly expensive and designed for fashion over safety. So Willie and Otis suck. Lots. Willie and his group of friends are pretty shitty for reasons that would spoil the story. I’ll be publishing Rascal in 2025 if I’m lucky. It has only a few bare connections to SGH and should be fine to publish ahead of it. :)

[ksfoxwald]

Fire and Hemlock Readalong: Part 3 Chapter 2

In which Polly finds Tom again.

This chapter contains the most overt depiction of magic in the entire book, which almost overshadows Polly's magic. She finds Tom by "following a tugging in her head," leading her to the Dumas Quartet rehearsing for a last-minute show. "Knowing things is Polly's heroic gift," Tom says. Later on, too, she's the one who sees through Mr. Leroy's trick with the trash monster.

I have to wonder what Tom told the quartet about Polly. Like, I would be seriously side-eyeing any friend of mine that told me they had a twelve year old RP partner who they met at a funeral. I feel like Ann would have some words to say about that. Also, we later learn that she has some connections to the Perry Leroys as well, though it's not clear if Tom knows; Ann might even know enough to suspect what Tom is using Polly for, even if she doesn't know the how.

Ann alias Tan Audel is the most interesting member of the quartet to me. Her gift, as Polly says, is that she never forgets, and indeed she is the one who writes the story in the new timeline that triggers Polly's memories, even though one of the others wrote the original. But she's also interesting as pretty much the only positive adult female representation in the book (to be fair, adult men are all pretty shady here as well; but there aren't any women in Nowhere except for Hero and Edna until Tan Audel is revealed). And Ann isn't described as heroic or pretty or with anything grand; she is described as having a "frank friendliness," eyes "direct and amused," with a "square, quiet face." She's not the sort of woman who shows up in hero tales but is very much the sort of woman you want in everyday life.

And when Polly asks ("hopefully") if Tom might marry Ann, Tom responds with a laugh and a "Ann has her own ideas about such things."

The "hopefully" is interesting, because Polly's reaction to Mary Fields has strongly resembled jealousy, but perhaps it hasn't quite turned into romantic jealousy yet. Her hopefulness seems to indicate that Tom is a sort of family member to her, and she's hoping he might marry Ann the way a child might hope for a nice stepmother. Ann's "own ideas" seem decidedly queer, though.

The scene with the quartet is so gentle and soft and cozy, one of the happiest moments in the entire book. The way the quartet all immediately take care of Polly and make sure her well-being is a priority is something we haven't seen from anyone except Granny, and even Granny's love has a gruff edge to it. And this is such an important scene because it sets the standard for how people, particularly children, should be treated, and that the way Polly's parents treat her really is horrible. It's hard when you're inside a situation sometimes to see how bad it is when it just feels normal.

In fact, Polly specifically does not read her book here, because she doesn't need the escape. (We also get the call back about not putting books facedown - it's from Tom of course, and it was strong enough to make it into her second set of memories.)

Tom takes Polly to the station (and so much of this book takes place at or going to or coming from train stations, or on roads. The liminal spaces between No Where and Now Here) but the wind that has been threatening for the past two chapters rears its head - literally - becoming a monster made of wind and garbage. The Leroy magic, of course, uses what is already there. But just as Tom tries to run it over with the car, Polly realizes it is actually Sam - or Tan Hanivar, as she shouts, because they are very much in Nowhere at that moment.

This, as Tom notes, is almost exactly what happens in one of the stories he wrote. "What is it about us?" Tom asks. "We make things up, and they go and happen."

Mr. Leroy uses them, Polly wanted to say. But there was more to it than that. She thought of Mr. Piper's shop in Stow-on-the-Water, which seemed to have nothing to do with Mr. Leroy. "I don't know," she said wearily.

Tom is starting to understand his curse, though he hasn't fully accepted it yet. It's interesting because between Tom and Polly, they have a complete picture of what is going on - Tom has the adult knowledge of history and context with the Leroys, while Polly has a child's insight and intuition about magic. But they aren't able to put the pieces together yet.

[biipbop]

Ooooh how about the other P5 cast? Strikers and Royal included. In the Flower child au

Havent played strikers yet (I own it and will get to it soon I swear 😞)

The first time Ann hears about Akira knowing gas chamber is from Ryuji. So its no surprise that she thinks he's full of shit and Akira would 100% commit to the bit and never confirm it. Everyone else will similarly follow suit and also think Ryuji is trying really hard to convince them that not only does Akira totally know gas chambers on a personal level but tatsujun isnt just PR. Theyre married and are Akira's adopted parents. It gets to the point that Ann and Ryuji start arguing about it publically. It becomes a running joke among there classmates.

Most of their classmates are pretty ick about it (they dont really think positively of Ann Ryuji and akira as is so they joke about how the deliquent is really out here trying to convince everyone he's related to celebrities). Mishima on the other hand believed it the instant he was told:

Ryuji: *points to Akira* This guy is the love child of tatsujun from gas chamber

Mishima: *sideeying ryuji* reaaaaally?

Akira: *straight faced knowing he looks like he knows you know hes lying* yep.

It was enough for Mishima.

Futaba already knew. She found out while doing a bg check on Akira before he moved into the cafe. She also doesnt tell anyone bc she also thinks it's fucking hilarious that no one else knows.

Haru initially doesnt believe them but she once met Jun at a charity function when she was younger. He had tatsuya with him and she did get the impression that they actually were romantically together. One day she corners Akira to find out the truth but it very much goes similarly as it did with mishima (Akira confirms but is he *actually* confirming it or just messing around??) Haru is eventually able to get a crack in the facade when she tells him how he met the two before and how she thinks they might actually be together. How encouraging it was to see a queer couple who were so in love that they couldnt really hide it. Akira breaks and ends up sharing family photos with her.

If youve seen my flower child au comics theyre kinda inconsistent with how and when morgana and Akechi find out. Earlier comics had them knowing during the events of the game while my more recent comics have them finding out post game. But i think I prefer them knowing during game cause it just makes better sense for me timeline wise so....ignoreing my own comics I guess

Morgana would technically be told the same time as Ryuji except Morgana would have 0 context as to who tatsuya and jun are or even who gas chambers is. So from Morgana's perspective Ryuji thought Akira's dad (who morgana saw pictures of from when Akira was a kid) was a girl. (He will never let Ryuji forget this). Ryuji would later be talking about gas chambers with Ann and she would be the one to show morgana their music and recordings of interviews and live shows. Because theyre fully dressed like a v-kei band Morgana wont put 2 and 2 together until after he actually meets them.

Even though he would also do a background check on Akira, Akechi doesnt know that about who Akira's parents are. (Jun and tatsuya couldnt legally adopt Akira so technically Katsuya and Maya would be Akira's legal parents but everyone in sumaru knows bc Jun and Tatsuya never hid their relationship. Also all the members of Gas Chambers go by a stage name for privacy reasons)

Like Ryuji Akechi also grew up familar with Gas Chamber bc his mom was a fan (side note: I think both Ryuji and Akechi would have young moms who couldve been good friends). Akechi, gun to head, would never admit this to anyone especially not akira but Jun would be his gay awakening. Akira only finds this out after Akechi meets his parents. They dont break up over this but they get close to it. Akira would refuse to talk to his dads for a week when he finds out leaving his parents panicked bc their bby boy is big sad and might have broken up with his first bf but doesnt want their help. They stay together and all is good but lord help Akechi if he ever points out any similarities between Jun and Akira.

Yusuke has no fucking clue who Gas Chambers is. But when he meets Eikichi he will go to stalker level to get a chance to draw him. Luckily for him Eikichi finds out about the little weirdo thinking hes beautiful and is all about it. He keeps every piece Yusuke gives him and even has Yusuke's paintings in the family restaurant as well as his home.

Sorry this is rambly!

Edit: I forgot Sumire!! I'll be honest, I have no clue. I dont believe she would know who Gas Chambers is. Futaba would probably only know bc she's a gremlin and constantly online.

Sumire most likely would think Ryuji is trying to tease her and not believe him either. She would be with the squad when they go visit Akira and find out Ryuji didnt lie. Shed be glad that Futaba and Akira got the pleasure of their long con going through without failure.

Also the p2 squad will realize that the metaverse was a thing when they hear Morgana talk.

[flowersandfashion]

Eloise,

I just wanted to say thank you for your blog. This is going to sound insane but the pipeline to finding your account went like this:

I've been struggling with lots of stuff ranging from my girlfriend of a few years breaking up with me to me heavily struggling with being sexualized by people close to me. All in all, I was looking for posts about womanhood and the like but as a femme sapphic woman, I felt so connected to your account. The aesthetics of it just really made me feel at ease and happy.

I was just curious, do you have any favorite pieces of media like books or movies you really love? I'm just trying to surround myself with stuff like that to help me feel better.

Sorry for all of that, just wanted to spread some love and appreciation. :))

- 🪻

Hello you gorgeous soul, thank you so much for taking the time to write this, you've made my day 💖 This blog is truly just me compiling pretty things that bring me joy, so it's lovely to think that it can have a similar effect on others.

I'm sorry you're having a rough time, in addition to sending you virtual hugs and kisses (xoxoxo), I have no shortage of media recommendations (especially with themes of sapphic womanhood) to offer you:

Anne with an E (2017-2019)

This is my go-to whenever I'm feeling anxious. Not only are the aesthetics absolutely gorgeous, but I adore the way it focuses on female friendships and finding your own identity. It's not afraid to address dark topics but always has an overall message of love and acceptance. I especially love how this adaptation represents queer identity too (Anne and Diana are girlfriends to me. and god bless Cole and Josephine).

I highly recommend the original novel Anne of Green Gables too! The show definitely captures the vibes perfectly so if you like one, you'll like the other.

A League of Their Own (2022)

I couldn't care less about baseball but I do love queer found family and women solidarity, and this has it in spades. All the characters are so loveable and it's just a nice heartwarming story (and very sad at points, but definitely uplifting as a whole).

Heartstopper (2022–)

Truly the ultimate queer comfort show. I don't have any particular thoughts about it that haven't been expressed by other people more eloquently. But my opinions can be summarised simply as: it's good, it's really good, it's so wholesome, the characters are so loveable, I love it.

Emma (2020)

This film is so goddamn pretty. I could watch it on mute and still have a great time just from all the beautiful costumes and cinematography. But the plot is delightful too. Dare I say that this film captures Jane Austen's wit and satire better than any other adaptation. I love how all of her novels portray women finding their way in the world and navigating relationships with friends and family, but I think Emma is especially great in this regard. (Also, Emma and Harriet are girlfriends to me).

Again, I would also recommend the novel Emma. It's quite a challenging read if you're not used to the writing style, but delightful once you get into it. And if we're talking Jane Austen novels, Persuasion is also a favourite of mine (definitely don't watch that film though).

Dating Amber (2020)

This is a tragically underappreciated Irish, queer, coming of age indie film. It's basically about a gay guy and lesbian who pretend to date each other in high school in 1990s Ireland. It's very funny (also sad at times) but ultimately very heartwarming.

Because I'm a sucker for a gay/lesbian beards found family trope, I also recommend these book: The Inverts (1920s lavender marriage, very funny, Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo vibes) and Gwen & Art Are Not in Love (Arthurian legend beard relationship, also very funny and camp, BBC Merlin vibes [if you get me]).

And if you like Dating Amber, you'll probably also like Handsome Devil. Another Irish, queer, coming of age indie film (but mlm-centric). It stars the same actor as Dating Amber (Fionn O'Shea), alongside a baby-faced Nicholas Galitzine and Andrew Scott. Imagine Dead Poets Society vibes, except instead of being about Romantic poetry, it's about New Romantic music. And explicitly gay and with a happier ending. (Sorry, this is like four recommendations in one).

The House in the Cerulean Sea

This book is described on the cover as 'like being wrapped up in a big gay blanket', and that is a very accurate description. Imagine Good Omens except it's Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children (I'm half convinced it's ineffable husbands fanfic tbh). This book made me cry happy tears, it's so incredibly heartwarming and uplifting. Top-notch found family and agonisingly slow-burn pining.

Other honourable mentions:

Please Like Me (2013-2016)

One Day at a Time (2017-2020)

Gentleman Jack (2019-2022)

Little Women (2019)

Pride (2014)

Ladybird (2018)

[raspberryconverse]

(pardon my bad cropping: it's been at least 8 years since I took a class on video editing and I can't figure out how to do it the way I want it)

When I saw this scene, it really got me thinking. At first I thought, "I never had any crushes on girls when I was younger. Discovering I was bisexual came out of nowhere." Or so I thought, until a few days ago.

I realized I was bisexual when I took a photography class my senior year of high school. My best friend was gay (so gay my mom could tell from across the street when we were 13), so it's not like I didn't know any queer people, but it just never really occurred to me that I could be queer too. Enter Purple-Haired Sarah. She had just moved to our town (I lived in one of those places the majority of people spend their entire childhood there), so I had just met her that year. She wasn't just pretty, but she (obviously) had purple hair and a fun style. If we had to work in pairs or groups, I wanted to be with her. Then one night I had a sexy dream about her. And that's when it clicked for me. Definitely a, "Well, guess I'm bi now." (There was a bit of experimentation with a friend of a friend to confirm, not that you necessarily need to do that)

But I really, truly thought I never had any crushes on other girls when I was younger. I saw this scene and thought, "Yeah, that was never me." I never had that urge to impress or desire to always be around certain friends- oh wait. Maybe I did.

My very first best friend was named Steph, or Steffy when we were younger. We met in second grade. I was always at her house or she was at mine (more often at hers because she had a computer and AOL so we could go in the chat rooms and do other online stuff in the early 90s). She used to live around the corner from me, but she moved a little bit away. Luckily, the school district let her and her brother still go to the same elementary school, but she did end up going to a different junior high/middle school (my district switched when we were in 8th grade, so we only spent 2 years at those schools). We also joined orchestra in 4th grade (violin for me, cello for her), though she didn't continue into JH/MS and I did. What was really interesting was that she facilitated in a crush I had on a boy who played viola (who eventually became a good friend in high school and we did make out a few times). I'd write him notes and she'd drop them in his viola case on her way to the cello section when we had rehearsals for the district wide Orchestra Festival. When we were younger, we both had a major love for the Baby-Sitters Club books. I remember one year I wanted us to dress as two of the characters for Halloween. She was supposed to be Kristy and I was Mary Anne (before her dad loosened up and let her wear things other than skirts and dresses). She didn't follow through with it though, and I was really upset about it.

I was really sad when Steph wasn't able to go to the same school as me for JH/MS. And when she went there, she really changed. TBH, I kinda did too, but I always was really disappointed that she changed so much. We were both big Hanson fans when they first were popular, but I never got into any of the other boy bands or pop artists of the late 90s/early 00s. She became really preppy and I was more punk/alternative (I went through a big Nirvana phase in 8th grade). It broke my heart that she wasn't my best friend anymore and we didn't have as much in common as we used to. We did go to the same high school and we were still friends, but it definitely wasn't the same. But I think the fact that I always wanted to hang out with her, was so disappointed when we weren't at the same school and that she changed so much might have been signs of an early crush (even if I was having crushes on boys at the same time).

The next one without a doubt (though I just thought of this yesterday) was my best friend Rachael. Rachael and I met in third grade and she was a part of my friend group with Steph. Later in elementary school, we were inseparable. She was definitely my best friend out of the friend group. In seventh grade, I spent a lot of time at her house. She even took me on a vacation with her family one summer. Unfortunately, in eighth grade she moved out to the county (IDK why my particular area uses the term "county" instead of "country," but that's just the local vernacular for the area west of the interstate). We stayed close friends, though. I still spent a lot of time at her house because my mom really liked her (not that she didn't like Steph) and as we got older, we got into similar music and clothing styles, unlike Steph. All through high school we spent a ton of time together, despite her being a 25 minute drive away (if that doesn't say something about how much I loved being with her, IDK what does). She was my partner in crime when I had a boyfriend my mom didn't like and she kind of a had thing with his friend too. We talked my grandma into taking us to see them, even though my mom forbade it. When I got a car, I would drive out to hang out with her all the time (and drive her and her boyfriend around and they'd make out in the backseat of my mid 80s Buick and I'd "accidentally" have to slam on the brakes so they'd go flying off the seat). We remained super close all through high school, despite not even being in the same school district. We went to local punk band concerts together, thrift shopped for fun random t-shirts from the kids section (that was kind of our style) and crushed on similar boys.

The only thing that was a bit of a problem with Rachael was when I came out as bisexual, it made her uncomfortable. Maybe she realized my feelings for her were more than platonic even though I didn't. I mean, there was always a lot of ass smacking and other silly things that could totally be seen as flirting, even though I didn't perceive it that way. But looking back, I totally see it now.

The last crush I didn't realize was a crush was the first one that got me thinking about this: Rhianon. I met Rhianon in seventh grade and she was just so cool, especially with such a cool name and I was boring Nicole V. Her parent let her dye fun color streaks in her dark hair and she wore such cool clothes. She was fairly popular, but not in a preppy way like it was in the late 90s. She didn't like boy bands or the other pop singers like Steph. She liked bands like No Doubt (she was very inspired by Gwen Stefani's fashion) and other alternative bands of the time. Honestly, she was kind of an inspiration. I wanted to be more like her. I wanted to be her. Maybe I just wanted her.

We were friends in high school because we still hung with the same crowd. I was definitely jealous of her: her confidence, her style, the boys she was able to date. I distinctly remember a local band show where she was dating one of the trombonist of one of the ska bands who I really like and I legit spent most of the show crying in the bathroom because seeing them all over each other made me so jealous. But was I jealous of her or was I jealous of him?

I certainly wouldn't have thought so at the time, but looking back, it probably was.

I definitely remember her posting on LiveJournal after she went to college that she had joined a sorority. I actually commented on the post and said I was very disappointed that she had because that just wasn't the Rhianon I knew. One of her new friends replied and didn't understand why I felt so strongly about it. But sororities just weren't very Rhianon, if you asked me. She still remained pretty cool all this time, though. She got married a few years before I did and she wore this really cute almost sort of rockabilly shorter wedding dress with a birdcage veil. I would have loved to be able to pull off something like that (not that I didn't love my wedding dress, because I wouldn't change a thing about the way my wedding turned out, minus the way the arch got set up), but I've just never had the confidence she's always had.

Oh, and the interesting thing about my Rhianon crush I didn't realize was still definitely a crush: she often comments or reacts to my Facebook posts and I was super disappointed that she didn't go to our high school reunion. I would have loved to have seen her. And now I know why.

That a-ha moment is really interesting to think about. Needless to say, Nick's bisexual discovery has made a lot of us older bis realize we had some of those feelings earlier than we originally thought. Even me, who swore up and down it was just Purple-Haired Sarah during senior year that did it for me. The more I think about it, the more I realize she probably wasn't the first.

[world-of-wales]

red white and royal blue (the book) was amazing and i loved how it seemed to open up the romcom genre to queer relationships an entirely different way! it's so witty and heartfelt and such a fun but earnest read and perfect for a holiday or a day by the beach! (also definitely my favourite by the author so far, one last stop was cute but the time travel element was a little weird for me and i kissed shara wheeler was just a queer paper towns (the novel by john green) with unlikeable characters, but i'm excited for their 4th novel!) also, books i've really enjoyed so far this year (no particular order or genre): - the roughest draft by emily wibberly and austin siegemund-broka (romance about two authors who had a falling out but have to write a novel together to fulfill their contractual obligations) - pet and bitter by akwaeke emezi (coming of age novel and prequel about what choices we can make when society is in denial) - happy place by emily henry (fake dating exes spending time with their friend group at a beach house) - our missing hearts by celeste ng (novel about identity and rebellion) - yellowface by r.f. kuang (unhinged in the best way about a white author who steals their dead asian friend's manuscript and publishes it under a racially ambiguous name and the ramifications of that) - small worlds by caleb azumah nelson (book about growing up and finding yourself amidst expectations from your immigrant parents in london with a beautiful music backdrop)

what kind of books to you tend to read? and what are your favourites from this year?

Honestly same, I loved it. I read it in 2020 and I was hooked. Read it in one sitting and spent the whole night awake finishing it. Exactly I agree with this, there used to be books about queen relationships before but they weren't done so well till Casey put RWRB out there. I have read books before that too but that never dealt with the characters in such a good way. It's my favorite by her too, i read her other books too but theres just some magic in RWRB that's never been matched again as per me.

I get ur point about OLS but I did like the time travelling aspect of it though (it's the fantasy romance reader in me). Oooh paper towns >>>> haven't talked about that book in so long. I was such a big John Green fan in ninth grade, totally obsessed with his books.

Ooh all these books sound amazing. Definitely adding a few to my tbr. I have read Small Worlds and just read happy place last week. Loved both of them. And Yellow face has been in my tbr too, I have the kindle version just need to find the time to read it.

So I can read pretty much anything - romance, mystery, coming of age, fantasy, biographies etc. My book interests are all over the place honestly.

Currently I'm on my romance and mystery phase. So I'm trying to finish Catherine Cowles blacklist. This year I had a slow start on my reading thanks to this being my last term in university. So I only got properly into reading in June. Since then I have been reading a lot of romances (anything and everything), thrillers and suspense, fantasy even. Though I have been struggling to find good thrillers this year so that's in a bit of a slump.

So my favs of this year have been -

Crowns of Nyaxia (1st book) by Carissa Broadbent

From Lukov with Love by Mariana Zapaata

The Spectacular by Fiona Davis

Loved loved loved Small Worlds

Finally read Things we never got over by Lucy Score

If this is love by Jewel E Ann

Magnolia Parks by Jessa Hastings

Dirty air series (4th book) by Lauren Asher

The guest by Emma Cline

Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yaaros

A scoundrel of her own by Stacy Reid (need to complete her blacklist too)

[hamstringy]

Books of 2023

this is mostly for me to yell at my lawn about books i want more people to read. my faves are highlighted in purple and have a star (☆) next to them. if anyone wants to suggest books at me........ <3

i did not think i was going to make my goal of 26 books, but then i got put on desk duty at work and discovered audiobooks!

The Traitor Baru Comorant - Seth Dickinson gah!!! Builds methodically and slowly but crumbles apart and hits you on the dick over and over. Cannot believe a guy named Seth Dickinson wrote this (affectionate).

The Goblin Emperor - Katherine Addison Classic feel-good whump, but don't think too hard about the politics. I would have been obsessed with this as a kid.

☆ Babel - R.F. Kuang ☆ A capital-T Tragedy that made me physically cry! RF Kuang is incredible at writing about colonialism and situations that go horribly wrong.

A Lady for a Duke - Alexis Hall Generally cathartic romance about a trans woman who fakes her death at Waterloo to live as a woman and falls in love with her childhood best friend. I think I am not entirely a romance girlie but definitely a solid book.

Sorrowland - Rivers Solomon Oh baby let's get weird and talk about politics! Contains a mycelium-fueled gay ghost orgy and some very good body horror.

A Prayer for the Crown-Shy - Becky Chambers The Monk and Robot duology keeps hitting me over the head with ruminations on all the coming-of-age questions but it offers me tea and a listening ear so I quite love it.

The Stars and the Blackness Between Them - Junauda Petrus I think the prose is well written, but I was definitely left wanting more regarding the magical realism.

Feed Them Silence - Lee Mandelo Again with the slacking on the magical realism. Frighteningly contemporary crumbling relationship and not nearly enough weird bullshit for me.

The Future of Another Timeline - Annalee Newitz I hated this book so much. I really think you could pass it off as the product of a corporate man, that's how shallow it is. It has mega commitment issues with the themes it tries to tackle. Also, if you're going to write a time traveling book you NEED to do at least cursory research???? Women in the 1890s did not wear bras????

No One is Talking About This - Patricia Lockwood A fun and brutal investigation of being chronically online and dealing with personal tragedies. Bonus points for being written by Miette the cat's owner.

☆ Greenwood - Michael Cristie ☆ Incredible multi-generational epic. Cristie knows the story he wants to tell and he executes it near-flawlessly. I didn't love the ending but the rest of the book makes up for it.

Rabid - Monica Murphy, Bill Wasik Definitely an interesting look a the cultural side of rabies, but I wish they had maybe not gone with such a wide array of subjects.

The Lucky Red - Claudia Cravens A queer (minor homophobia) Western in the spirit of all the good female country singers.

Persuasion - Jane Austen Oh baby. I get it now.

Ancillary Justice - Ann Leckie An unfortunate choice of media means I can't rate this higher. I think it's too hard sci-fi for me to listen to it, so I need to reread it in physical form.

Deaf Republic - Ilya Kaminsky Brutal. Kaminsky is really fucking good at writing about war in a pretty minimalist style.

Small Things Like These - Claire Keegan A book that reminds you about the point of choosing to do something right. Also has the added benefit of teaching me about something I didn't know about (The Magdalene Laundries).

Eartheater - Dolores Reyes Another victim of the audiobook medium. I'm not sure if this is because it was translated or because I was expecting something a bit different, but I didn't really jive with this.

☆ Islands of Abandonment - Cal Flyn ☆ Absolute banger. Beautiful prose, concept that makes me go a bit feral. I want to tattoo this on my brain.

Fourth Wing - Rebecca Yarros This is not a fair review--I read this because my friend hated it. A deeply unserious and superficial book to me as an avid fantasy person and not a romance person. I wish Yarros had actually gone full hog and actually included disability in the sex scenes at the very least.

The Vanished Birds - Simon Jimenez Genuinely not sure how to feel about this? Sprawling space opera with purposefully unfinished ties. It does make me excited to read A Spear Cuts Through Water though.

Kindred - Olivia E. Butler I get the Butler hype now! Read it.

Flux - Jinwoo Chong A lukewarm positive review here? Very much a deep dive on grief, tech politics, and fandom. Has some weird timeline stuff so I was definitely confused.

Upright Women Wanted - Sarah Gailey Reads like that one ao3 excerpt of Sasuke learning about gay people. It feels like there's next to no world-building or character development. The characters are incredibly juvenile and all the changes happening are spelled out.

The Dragon Republic - R.F. Kuang Lord, this was a deeply intricate trainwreck of a book. Deeply uncomfortable and yet incredibly gripping.

Rereads:

Nona the Ninth, Harrow the Ninth, and Gideon the Ninth - Tamsyn Muir Decided I needed to listen to the audiobooks of these to inflict maximum damage. Good lord, I am still insane about these books.

Graceling - Kristen Cashore I was obsessed with these books as a 10 year old, and this one still mostly holds up. A good example of romances for little girls who aren't convinced by romance.

[nimuetheseawitch]

rules: list eight shows for your followers to get to know you better

Tagged by @marley--manson

I'm pretty sure I did something like this recently where people were using the shows' posters. Since it says "get to know you better," I'm going to assume anyone reading this can read my little description and already know I'm into those shows. I'm also going to do that because it makes it harder/more interesting for me.

Doctor Who This was the show that got me onto Tumblr (that's not entirely true - my roommate dragged me on here, kicking and screaming, just like how I have joined every social media site ever), and it's one of the first shows I was weird about as a (kind of) adult. I'm an Eccleston fan through and through. This is another show that my partner and I stalled on because of a variety of life things, so we're years and years behind.

Veronica Mars I love this show. I didn't actually watch it until I was in grad school (and then I binged an entire season without sleeping one time during a PhD-induced anxiety spiral, so), but I adored it. I have always loved the girl detective, or even just boy detective, genre (looking at you, Harriet the Spy, Sammy Keyes, and Encyclopedia Brown), and this just did that dripping in early 2000's teen tv drama. And I adore Enrico Colantoni as her dad. I also always appreciate a detective show where the cops are the bad guys.

The O.C. I am often kind of ashamed of my deep love for The O.C., and I'm trying not to be. I got the DVDs out from the library and hid in my bedroom to watch it because my family would've made fun of it (probably - I was also a teenager and just afraid of people judging me). This marks the beginning of my massive crush on bisexual characters played by Olivia Wilde. I loved every moment of this show, sometimes especially when it was being awful.

The Avengers (1965-1967) British spy-fi starring Diana Rigg playing Emma Peel, an actively publishing theoretical physicist who knows martial arts and wears catsuits. What more could you want? If anything made me queer, it was Emma Peel. And although she's partnered with John Steed, supposedly a professional spy while she's an amateur, she regularly came in kicking to save his butt. I have only ever seen Series 4 & 5 with them as the main team, so I actually have zero opinions on the rest.

Killjoys I love this show so much. I wish it had been allowed to have more than 10 episodes a season because I would've loved to see more unabashedly queer sci-fi bounty hunter side plots. I love that the main characters are platonic life partners who did crime until they ran out of money and became bounty hunters. And that there are assassins and creepy conspiracies and cyberpunk awesomeness and the show is almost more bisexual than Lost Girl.

Anne With An E I loved Anne of Green Gables as a kid, and this show was beautiful and compelling and did a really good job with most things. This was one of the first shows I did a virtual watchalong with friends in 2020 at the beginning of COVID, and those watchalongs reminded me that I had internet friends and showed me how I could shift my social life, so this show is important to me.

Pose I don't even know where to start. I love this show, and Papi and Angel are perfect and deserve the world.

Buffy/Angel Buffy and Angel were incredibly important to my development as a queer feminine-presenting person. I actually didn't watch Buffy all the way through until after I'd become obsessed with Firefly. I have lots and lots of feelings about Buffy and Angel and I have so many of the comics that were a continuation of the show, and I got really into the lore, and I'm glad it existed. I'm glad I enjoyed it, and I'm glad I went back and saw how problematic a lot of it was. And whenever I think about it, I think wistfully of Monster of the Week style shows with a bajillion episodes per season.

I hope people feel like they know me better because I feel like I just went on an emotional journey, y'all. I'm not tagging anyone because I'm tired, but if anyone wants to do this, I would love to read what other people have to say.

[bobbyinthegarden]

2023 Reading Challenge. Vampires: The Gilda Stories by Jewelle L. Gómez

I was talking about this little challenge that I’m doing to a friend of mine recently, and when I said that one of the categories is vampires he said “are you going to read Twilight?” to which I said “I can’t, I’ve already read it.”. Thinking about it, I’ve actually read quite a bit of vampire fiction, certainly many of the more obvious ones (Dracula, Carmilla, Anne Rice’s Vampire Chronicles), so I decided to go for something a little more niche.

I chose to The Gilda Stories because it was recommended in Princess Weekes’ video about the prevalence to vampire characters who in life had been confederate soldiers (Jasper from Twilight, Bill from True Blood, Damon from The Vampire Diaries, etc.). She recommended this book as a kind of counterpoint to those depictions of vampires, as a book which instead focusses on a formerly enslaved person who becomes a vampire in the 1850s and subsequently lives through the next two hundred years of American history, up to the then-present day of the early 1990s, and beyond, all the way up to 2050. I’d never read a book with a premise like this and so I decided to check it out.

Before I get into it, I’d just like to say that I am Not American™, and so my knowledge of American history is pretty limited. I definitely have gaps in my knowledge that I am seeking to fill, particularly in regards to the American Civil War, which is something that I never learnt about at any level of education. I’m also white, so there are certainly elements and nuances to the black experience that this book touches on that I will never be able to fully grasp or understand.

I liked this book a lot, I actually finished it a couple of weeks back and I’ve recommended it to a few people since then, and it’s stuck in my mind in a way that books don’t always do. One thing that attracted me to this book is that I really love genre bending, and this book has A LOT of genre bending in it, so much so that I could probably list at least five genres, it’s horror it’s historical fiction, it’s queer romance, it’s eco-feminist fiction, it’s speculative fiction and it’s sci-fi. It’s all of these things, and yet at the heart of it, it’s a deeply personal story about a queer found family.  I mean, come on! What’s not to like? It was almost hard to believe that this book was published in 1991, because it felt like it could have been published within the last 10 years. I also really liked all of the different characters as well, they are feel very lived in and highly realised, plus all very distinctive from one another.

In researching this book, I’ve seen quite a bit of comparison to Anne Rice’s Vampire Chronicles, which I do *kind of* see it (though more so with the new TV series than with the original novels, in fact I feel like this is the story that the new TV series wishes it was), but I wouldn’t have necessarily made the connection myself, it really is it’s own thing.

While I did enjoy this book and do recommend it, I do feel the need to give a content warning, as there are some elements that some people might find upsetting, such as: attempted rape, depictions of slavery, hard drug use and violence against sex workers. All of these things are portrayed as unambiguously immoral, but they are present, so bear that in mind. If you can deal with those things, then check it out!

[the-ocean-is-trans]

my review of dear wendy by ann zhao is under the cut. going to be upfront and say that i DNF the book, i got about 2/3rds of the way and had to stop.

i'm going to start with what i liked about the story. i enjoyed the depiction of jo's family, especially her two moms and jo's close relationship with them. i liked that the fact that jo would go to her moms for comfort, and the fact that she went to school close to where they live was never treated as a bad or immature thing for her to do. this feels pretty important for a lot of anxious young college students actually; it's okay to want your family close as you navigate being an adult. i also found the scene where her 12 year old brother comes out as straight very endearing, and a fun flip of expectations but one that felt quite real for the context of her queer family.

i've also seen some criticism of the book saying that it was childish and immature to write characters as romance and sex repulsed, which i actually think is completely fine. some aroace people are romance and sex repulsed. if this doesn't represent you that's fine, but it might represent someone else's experiences. what i found childish and immature was literally everything else about the narrative.

the central conflict of the story (if it can be called that, because it was so trite) was about the two characters having...differing opinions on how to give relationship advice on their respective advice column instagram accounts ("dear wendy "and "sincerely wanda", for sophie and jo respectively)? but we are never shown why sophie has the conviction that wanda's advice is bad, or why it's bad to jokingly respond to people's relationship queries, and from jo's pespective, we don't get why she is motivated to sometimes give real advice, sometimes answer with a joke, and overall why she engages in the online discourse with wendy. i could not tell you what these two main characters motivations are, and i think sometimes in the narrative they even forget why they are fighting. the online insults also came off like they were written by someone who has never once witnessed any type of interpersonal conflict and was just giving an approximation of what human behavior is like.

we are told (not shown) that offline sophie and jo are this bonded pair of best friends, but all we get from their relationship dynamic is one of them saying some bland queer truism (TERFs are bad, it's hard to find other aroace people) and the other agreeing. seriously, most of the book is either internal monologue or external dialogue that comes off as the author preaching her own opinions. there is no character development.

in addition to lacking any character development, the characters are shown acting in truly bizarre and wildly selfish ways, but we are told that this behavior is...idk meaningful? deep? there's no self awareness. for instance, we are told that sophie has "mommy issues" (the actual phrase that sophie uses in front of her college professor, which that was also a whole thing) but we aren't ever shown any conflict with her family, and the couple conversations we get with her and her parents are a little stilted but overall pretty loving? like i'm also aroace and chinese and i do think zhao captured the conversational tone of an immigrant parent quite well, but i was not left convinced that there was much estrangement there. sophie even complains that her parents are only paying her tuition so that she will cross-register in some MIT classes???? seriously, complaining about your family paying your tuition???? in this economy???? this isn't shown with any amount of criticality. i think it would have been compelling to have sophie share this opinion, and have someone else challenge her on it, you know, in a way that causes some growth and reflection, maybe even portray some nuance in that yes it can suck to have your parents force certain expectations onto you AND there is inherent privilege in their support. in a book striving so hard to share it's political opinions, the missing race/class politics felt very noticeable.

then there's jo, who tries to keep her one roommate and close friend from professing her romantic feelings to her other roommate and close friend. we know jo is doing this because we have been told time and time again that she is afraid of all her friends ending up in romantic relationships and leaving her behind. which is actually kind of an interesting fear/motivation to have, and pretty relatable as an aroace person! unfortunately it's not developed well. the roommate/friend accuses jo of being "selfish" when she finds out which yeah, actually that behavior is pretty selfish, but rather than having jo reflect on her behavior or experience any kind of growth at all, we are just shown her crying and breaking down and not going...anywhere after that. not even so far as to realize that the thing that is keeping her friends at arms length is her intense fear of losing them, which i thought would be the logical conclusion of that arc?

overall, the narrative came off as being appropriate for middle grade, but the fact that these were supposed to be college students really threw me. i actually think if the novel was adapted to be a middle grade novel it could have been a bit more successful, because the central conflict feels much more fitting for way younger characters. it would have been amazing to read about these aroace characters' experiences of loneliness, estrangement, and building platonic love (ostensibly what the novel is about/being marketed as) but instead we got a bunch of shallow platitudes, preachy comments about queer discourse, and jokes that fell so flat I would not have known they were jokes but for the characters being described as "bursting into laughter".

look, there's a lot of pressure on young queer authors of color to shoulder the burden of representing their very underrepresented communities, which i don't think is at all fair. i'm not trying to judge this book on it's "quality of ace rep". it's a book about aroace people, and just like there are bad books about straight people, we should also be allowed to have a bad book about aroace people and not have it's quality be used as a cudgel to beat down a marginalized author. i do sincerely hope that ann zhao continues to write, and further develops as an author, because the premise of the book was promising, and i think with some more maturity, could have been handled quite well.

[gaahhh]

Posting this here for posterity::: written Nov. 2022 but never posted

I want advice:

For context, (there's a lot of context)

me, "Heather", 25f Queer (very rarely into men so Finn is an outlier)

primary partner, "Finn", 27m Straight

meta, "Anne", 26f, Straight? Unsure

Finn and I met Sep 2019 when I came back to work at a company I had previously left. We started sleeping together pretty quickly after meeting. This was messy within the context of both our other relationships we were in at the time. Mine was open but unhealthy, his was monogamous and also unhealthy and both of our previous relationships were kind of in the process of ending anyway.

Anne is one of the managers at another site of our company so we both know her and like her and both crush on her a little in the way you do on your coworkers. For a short period of time in summer 2020 she was my direct manager while I was temporarily moved sites because of covid, before I got promoted (still a couple of levels below Anne) and move back to working in the same site as Finn.

Otherwise Anne and I worked together but not closely and got on well at staff parties etc and Finn and Anne had a similar amount of contact.

Finn and I couldn't tell people we worked with we were kind of seeing each other because colleagues that are in a "relationship" the policy is that one of them would have to move locations which neither of us wanted.

Between November 2019 and December 2020 we were casual friends with benefits, mostly when we would be drinking. We were friendly at work and would maybe go out once a week and would end up sleeping together very occasionally, once a month or less.

Jan 2021 we start getting closer, spending more time together and hanging out, rather than just drinking and having sex. We start sleeping over without sex at all, that kind of thing. At the time I mentioned to him that this was starting to feel more like a relationship rather than just friends with benefits which we had previously established and we both decided to keep going because we were making each other happy.

I am a super open person and my friends and family all knew about Finn at this point, some had met him in passing when he'd been to my place and I had met his family when I helped him move a couch, but they didn't know about anything between us at this point. He is much more private in general with his life.

Another 6 months passed (Summer 2021) and although there were a few arguments in between about seeing other people and making time for each other, we decided that we were actually in a relationship but we were totally happy to date and sleep with other people as long as it was not at the expense of our relationship.

(All of this happened while we were still secret from work)

November 2021 we had a staff party where eventually Finn, Anne and I all headed back to his place to keep the party going a little longer (she didn't know about Finn and I)

I fell asleep on the couch, they kept talking for a few hours and then she went home but they had a goodnight kiss and it was cute and exciting for them!

Finn told me straight away when he woke me up to get into bed rather than the couch.

We had a conversation about him exploring this relationship with Anne and what kind of things would need to be in place for it to be fair and consensual and help it work smoothly.

I would prefer him to tell her that we are together, breaking our previous no telling co-workers rule.

He would prefer to not tell her anything about seeing anyone else as it doesnt affect their individual relationship.

Compromise, he told her he had a girlfriend but that the relationship was open and she didn't ask who she was, so it was left at that.

Because Finn and I were both in the same department and the same site, we couldn't take any holiday time at the same time and we only very rarely had days off with each other and this was having an affect on mine and his relationship especially considering Anne and Finn work in different departments and had control over rotas so could purposely have days off together.

I found this a little tricky to deal with as Anne still doesnt know about me and Finn and having to talk to her on the phone is hard for me with my radical honesty approach.

March 2022, a job became available with one of our company's competitors that was more money and higher up than I currently was and although I love my company and have huge loyalty to them, I decided that if I leave I would have more time with Finn and less need to be in contact with Anne, so win-win.

I was hoping this would encourage more quality time with Finn as I was envious that the two of them went out on proper date nights to restaurants and bars and all Finn and I ever did (do) is hang out at home, watch TV and go to bed

I got the job, and while I was working my notice period it turned out that Anne had been head hunted by the same competitors I had just moved to and was about to become my boss again.

To move forward with this, I thought it was only fair to me and to Anne that Anne was made aware that Finn's secret girlfriend is actually me, Heather who she knows and has worked with in the past and who was about to be working with much more closely

Finn agrees and tells her. They decided they would prefer a more parallel polyamory approach so basically that is all thats said, Anne and I never acknowledge that either of us are seeing Finn and have a pretty great working relationship as far as I'm concerned.

I admire so many things about Anne from both a professional and personal standpoint. I think she is amazing at her job and kind and smart and also taller than me, more conventionally pretty and working a way higher role even though we are almost the same age.

So I am coming here for a few reasons:

One for advice in how to not hate myself because I am not her

Two for advice on what to do when I have to share space with her so often - currently I see her more than Finn does as she is sharing my office while my site needs more intensive support

Usually we are totally fine but sometimes it makes my chest hurt

The other day she came into work directly from Finn's and she smelled like the fancy soap that he and I bought together on a date and I could not get that out of my head

She recently left some shoes behind at his place for the first time too, and seeing those in his hallway when I got back made me super uneasy for reasons that are unfair and unhelpful

Three for validation that this is a weird fucking situation, even for people who consider weird the norm!