#AHHHH OKAY YEAH FUCK
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
deoidesign · 2 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Thinks about my next series again... I drew the icon for it!
I'm planning to have it launched within a year! I'm hoping for summer 2025. I want to make a prelaunch page before Time and Time Again ends so people can subscribe if they're interested, but I'm worried the series return would be too early...
#SORRY HAHAHA REPOSTING IMMEDIATELY#i. it. IM SORRY okay the.#i had 'im not interested in the comic' as an option but it immediately made me feel bad#DONT FEEL BAD IF YOU PICKED IT i put it there#i just realized its not really a helpful metric to me at all!#im making the comic either way!#so i just want to gague interest. disinterest doesnt do much for me. you can come and go as you please!#just wanting to retain readers as much as possible but without losing them due to taking too long#ahhhh the balance of marketing. a beautiful beast she is.#anyways yeah hoping to launch like about as tta is ending#or like at LEAST a prelaunch page by then#im also not intending for the prelaunch page to be like. announced...#moreso just a link i append on art for the series!#just so when a drawing of zagan gets 500 notes#people who are interested in what hes from can. see that...#anyways. sorry i haven't been posting work is wild im going 70+ hours a week again i am so tired#not much time to draw non work stuff#im hanging on by a thread of having multiple projects i can bounce between again#and sometimes thats this one! so heres the results of some mental health work variety#we were legion#polls#sorry for the instant repost. in my defense. i am exhausted.#i can not wait until im making a different comic that i can do a fucking. normal ass schedule with#where im not every week gasping for breath in some kind of bad at swimming metaphor.#anyways if youre not interested dont tell me. it doesnt matter to me. no offense but i just dont wanna hear it.#i want to make the comic and my audience as much as i love you all is not going to have any control over what i do with my art#im gonna make this comic if i only get it done on weekends after getting home from the fuckin movie theater#i am not working for webtoon again wnd im not forcing myself into the dirt for comics again#but im also never gonna stop making them. just need to build a healthier relationship!#FUCK I MADE IT A ONE DAY POLL.
56 notes · View notes
tiddiesoutwhenthetisout · 2 months ago
Text
not me curling my laptop charger wire the way you curl band equipment cords HAHAHA god i miss it
#i really said “okay big performance in the city square let's make this work” and i did but absolute fuckery of the manager just made me...#and she also used to complain about being an opening act-- like come on that's a nationally-renowned band and we're not there yet 😭#we used to fight a lot though so ack i really should have taken that as a red flag#but i was 14 and stupid 🤷‍♂️#being solo way better uM i shouldn't say this yet but i got a commission today audhauagah i don't even have a portfolio#fuck guys i'm so so so nervous from big changes in life because uM god i just came from actual hell with various things working to make me#kms#but uH we're uH not too keen on that anymore atm and uH it's probably going to all fuck up after i share that i have good news in life#but yk what#let's keep challenging god#i know he hates me#but we will not be defeated we will strangle him by the tie#AHHHH help me i want to get into music again pls pls pls pls pls#anyway back to my old band manager#she was known for being a shitwad in the scene anyw but i was young and stupid as i sais#and i defended her and rationalized her behavior because “we're friends right”#i'm starting to get why my mom is wary of people i get to know#i'm tbh a fucking idiot i would never admit that elsewhere (nah i do) uM my brain is bouncing off the walls#i took a bargain with 7pm coffee and look where it got me#i was also getting up there in my 5 days of uni absences agsgshags#DOES ANYONE ACTUALLY READ THESE I KINDA HOPE NOW NO ONE DOES#IM KINDA UHHH MY CHILD THERAPIST SAID UNCONVENTIONAL#I THINK SHE MEANT FUCKING CRAZY#sorry#oh yeah i walked tf out the band after that big performance set up just for us because i couldn't keep working with that kind of environment#other bands started flocking to recruit or proxy after i was let go by my famously fucked-up ex-manager LOL#but um i have issues so i'm not among them and i think they get the message tbh#appears and disappears#that is actually my brand
7 notes · View notes
phagodyke · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
the way this scene w caiman reassuring nikaido in v21 parallels that one w nikaido reassuring caiman back in v10 and its basically the first time theyre properly reunited in the wholeass 10 volumes since then.... brb sniffling + sobbing
Tumblr media Tumblr media
5 notes · View notes
boytoy-mutt · 2 years ago
Text
i think tumblr has bullied (/lh) me into liking so many things. didn’t used to like the term cunt for my parts but if it’s accompanied by boy or puppy in the front then it’s okay <3 also bc of a few mutuals i think i’m warming up to somno…
9 notes · View notes
astrxealis · 2 years ago
Text
HI GUYS DID YOU KNOW LOVE NIKKI WAS LITERALLY MY CHILDHOOD and the sea ver getting shut down years ago made me the saddest. for the longest time i still had it installed on my phone even if it wouldn't work anymore. but now bcs i finally know how to yk, get games on the na app store, i can finally FUCKING GET MY CHILDHOOD GAME AND PLAY IT AGAIN AFTER SO MANY YEARS
7 notes · View notes
krispiecake · 2 years ago
Text
MY BATHROOM CEILING IS LEAKING. FUCKING KILLING EVERYONE AND MYSELF
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
KILLING VIOLENCE MAIMING DESTROYING MURDER AHHHHHHHHHHHH
2 notes · View notes
fox-fiona-felix-feebee · 5 months ago
Text
happy pride month
Happy pride month people! Finally the month has come when us queers can tell people to do whatever we want them to do with the justification that it’s pride month. example of this godly power:
Me: hey, could you buy me a coffee
Cis and straight person: what? No, but your own coffee.
me: it’s pride month. I’m gay. It would be homophobic of you not to buy me a coffee.
cis and straight person: oh darn, I see I’ve fallen into you trap, here’s a coffee.
although it’s also the month of rainbow capitalism but you know, you win some you lose some…
0 notes
slaymaxuwu · 8 months ago
Text
yeowch mag 200
think I'm gonna finish tma today 😐
295 notes · View notes
kagedbird · 1 year ago
Text
I'm going to explode from stress someone use my head like a squeeze ball
0 notes
thewispsings · 5 months ago
Text
broken up? no, engagement! | max verstappen
pairing: max verstappen x actress!reader
summary: y/n l/n has a weird way of announcing hers and max’s engagement.
Tumblr media
liked by, danielricciardo, charles_leclerc, and 602,927 others!
yourusername: i no longer have a boyfriend.
view comments below!
user1: wait what
user2: i’m sorry???
user3: DID YOU AND MAX BREAK UP???
user4: no no no
user5: this CANNOT mean what i think it does
user6: you’re kidding me right
charles_leclerc: please answer my messages!
user8: no way
user9: THE CAPTION???
danielricciardo: ?
danielricciardo: answer my messages please
landonorris: mine too?
user10: does anyone know what is going on?
user11: so you’re available now 😏
user12: you were too pretty for max anyways 🙄
landonorris: um what’s going on?
user13: lando just being as lost is so??
user14: wait but why would she and max break up
user15: i’m so…confused?
user16: MAX ISNT IN THE LIKES??? OMG NOOO
Tumblr media Tumblr media
— f1gossip has posted new pictures!
Tumblr media
f1gossip: y/n l/n was seen cozying up with cast mate, Luke Newton amidst breakup rumors between her and max verstappen. thoughts?
view comments below!
user17: “cozying up” and it’s her taking a picture of him ??? 🙄
user18: admin is acting like they were making out in front of everyone…
user19: oh!
user20: users on twitter were saying max was THERE with them so??
user21: she moves on fast!
user22: this sounds wrong…
user23: we literally know NOTHING about hers and max’s relationship or WHY they broke up. let’s not assume.
user24: my heart just broke
user25: okay but her and luke are kinda cute together? no? just me?
user26: HER AND MAX WERE CUTERRR
user27: i’ll start foaming at the mouth if y/n l/n doesn’t come out and say her caption was just a joke.
user28: HER AND MAX WERE SUPPOSED TO GET MARRIEDDDD!!!!!😓😓😓
user29: i can’t do this rn. i just can’t.
Tumblr media
liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 962,028 others!
maxverstappen1: I understand that, without my agreement, my lovely finance has put out a instagram post this morning indicating that we have broken up. This is wrong, we have not broken up. We got engaged. We are to be wed.
view comments below!
yourusername: i thought they would understand what i meant 😞
user30: GIRL ALL YOU SAID WAS YOU NO LONGER HAD A BF???
user31: you did NOT phrase your words correctly
user32: gave me heart attack and for what 😐
user33: don’t play with me like that ever again.
danielricciardo: i love you @/yourusername, but please do not play with my heart like that again.
danielricciardo: BUT YAY!!!! WEDDING OF THE CENTURY!!
user34: OMG ???
user35: I KNEW IT!!! I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!
user36: AHHHHH AHHHHH AHHHHH AHHHH
user37: oh thank GOD
user38: pls don’t ever scare me like that again 💗
landonorris: OMG OMG OMG OMG ???!??!??
landonorris: AND YOU LOT DIDNT TELL ME ?!?!?
landonorris: YNSTAPPEN WEDDING!! AHHHH
user39: congratulations!!!
f1: about time you proposed 😒
maxverstappen1: ?
redbullracing: so excited for the red bull themed wedding!! ☺️
yourusername: yeah that won’t be happening
redbullracing: i understand.
user40: i’m crying??
user41: does this mean i don’t have a chance with y/n anymore ?? ☹️
user42: THAT SHOULDVE BEEN MEE
charles_leclerc: congratulations too you both 💗
maxverstappen1: thank you charles 💙💙
user43: omg just ask him to be your best man already 🙄🙄
oscarpiastri: it is an honor to have my tweet used as your engagement announcement 🧡🧡
yourusername: max couldn’t resist 😒
user44: i just know this wedding is going to be GORGEOUS
georgerussell63: congrats too you both! ❤️
yourusername: you’ll sing at the wedding right?
georgerussell63: duh 🙄
yourusername: perfect!
lewishamilton: so excited 💗💗
yukitsunoda0511: can i cook?
yourusername; of course you can yuki!!
user45: i’m so excited and it’s NOT EVEN MY WEDDING??
schecoperez: did you tell her how you were shitting yourself with nerves this entire week?
maxverstappen1: no 😒
yourusername: aw max 🥹🥹
Tumblr media
liked by, maxverstappen1, georgerussell63, oscarpiastri, and 1,238,028 others!
yourusername; i got married today. it was cool. 10/10 would do again!
view comments below!
user46: was the wedding 10/10 or was the groom 10/10??
yourusername: both!
user45: OMG ITS HAPPENED??
user46: so happy for you both 🥹
maxverstappen1: 💙💙
georgerussell63: i personally think my singing brought everything together…
yourusername: it really did george, it really did
charles_leclerc: so incredibly happy for you both ❤️
user47: we all saw the video of you sobbing during the ceremony charles…
user48: to be fair, EVERYONE was sobbing
user49; their vows even made ME cry
landonorris: amazing wedding, 10/10 would attend again!
yourusername: thank you little lando 🧡🧡
oscarpiastri: i would like to request the video of my dancing to be scrubbed off of the internet.
maxverstappen1: no chance mate 😂
yourusername: it’s okay oscar, i thought your dancing was adorable!!
lewishamilton: me and roscoe had the times of our lives ❤️❤️
user50: ROSCOE WENT TO THE WEDDING ?? 😭
user51: not only roscoe, but alex and TWO of his cats 😭😭
Tumblr media
liked by, yourusername, danielricciardo, yukitsunoda0511, shecoperez, and 1,629,028 others!
maxverstappen1: i married my bestfriend today. it was amazing. 10/10 would do again!
view comments again!
user52: he’s officially off the market ladies 😒
user53: he’s been off the market for 4 years ???
user54: if my man doesn’t love me as much as max loves y/n i don’t WANT HIM
user55: ever since y/ns “i no longer have a bf” post i’ve been thanking the gods that this is how it turned out
danielricciardo: bestfriend? wow, you get married and suddenly you forget who raised you.
maxverstappen1: y/n is my bestfriend. she always will be.
danielricciardo: JUST RUB IT IN THEN.
user56: omg her dress 😍😍
user57; them >>
user58: did you guys see that they BOTH took each others last name??
user59: wait really?
user58: yeah 🥹 it’s y/n l/n-verstappen and max verstappen-l/n
user60: that is the cutest thing ever
user61: the matching captions 😞😞
user62: remember last year when y/n made everyone believe they broke up??
user63: thank GOD that wasn’t true
yourusername: i love you mr l/n
maxverstappen1: i love you more mrs verstappen
user64: WHEN IS IT MY FUCKING TURN
3K notes · View notes
dumplingsjinson · 1 year ago
Text
List of “not-so-random suggestive and non-suggestive” prompts 
“How was your sleep?” “Mm.. It was good. Better.” “Better how?” “Better because you’re here.” (THE WAY I GOT SO FLUSTERED WTF)
“That’s my girl/boy,” Character B murmurs in a hushed voice, stroking their fingers through Character A’s hair while Character A rests their head on their chest, trying to catch their breath. (THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT INTERNALLY, THE AUDACITY HE AUDACITIED??? WHAT THE FUCK??? EXCUSEEEE MEEEEEE??? BTW, SIR, HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS IN THE MORNING-)
“Fuck, you turn me on so much with the noises you make,” Character B groans, thrusting their hips up into Character A’s and Character A whimpering softly at that. (Okay so I added the fuck at the start because it’s hotter this way bUTTTT WKGKSKFS PLSSSSS I JUST- OH MY GOD, I think I just realised that dialogue to me is SO IMPORTANT LMFAOOO)
“There are two hot things in this room right now: you, and the temperature.” (LET ME BREATHE, DAMNNNN) 
“Mmm, I’m gonna hog the bed so you can’t get on,” Character A murmurs, laying sprawled out on the bed. “That’s fine, I can just lay on you,” Character B says, making their way to the bed. “…Are you calling me a bed?” Character A questions as Character B gets on top of them, careful not to crush them under their weight. “Yeah, you're my bed,” Character B murmurs, snuggling close to Character A. (FUCKCKKCKXKDKKSKGKAKD HE’S JUST OUT HERE FLIRTING TO THE MAX WITH ME AND LEAVING ME SPEECHLESS TF)
“I told you my bed’s cozy,” Character B says, chuckling as they make their way over to Character A, who’s snuggled up under the covers. They pull the cover back and climb into the bed next to Character A, wrapping their arms around them. “And now it’s even cozier,” Character B murmurs into Character A’s neck. “Because you’re here?” Character A questions playfully. “Yeah,” Character B answers.
A laughter filled tickling play fight session somehow turning into them making out, turning into Character A straddling Character B, head thrown back in pleasure as they grind their hips against Character B’s while Character B holds onto their hips, thrusts matching the momentum of Character A’s movements.  
Spending way too much time tickling each other, peals of laughter coming from them both as they both try to attack each other’s sensitive spots. (His laughter is so cute AND I REALLY MISS HIM PLS WJDSK)
Morning cuddles and kisses as sunlight spills into the room.
“I’m gonna fuck you so good once we get there, yeah?” (MY HONEST REACTION WAS LITERALLY “???” I JUST?? WHAT?? SINCE WHEN WAS HE- AND HIM SWEARING? HOT HOT HOT HOT WKGKAKS)
Character A taking Character B’s hand into theirs while they’re driving. “You can drive with one hand, right?” they ask with a little grin, and Character B chuckles and nods. “Of course I can.” (HIM DRIVING WITH ONE HAND IS SO HOT BYE)
Character B guiding the speed of Character A’s hips as Character A grinds against them. (can he PLEASE manhandle me-)
“Okay, I’ll let you tickle me wherever you want if you give me one kiss.” (He lied a few times AHAHA, dodged my attacks instead after I gave him his kisses bruhhh) 
Character B lending their clothes to Character A since Character A’s staying the night. (The way I smelled like him AHHHH)
The soft “yeah?” Character B would mutter in response when they’re messing around with Character A and noises would fall from Character A’s mouth, involuntarily.
Stopping their play fight every now and again to kiss each other. 
Character B flirting with Character A and Character A not knowing how to respond other than half groaning and half laughing and calling them insufferable (affectionately). (Like I said, I’m romantically constipated-) 
Character B laughing every time Character A calls them annoying and insufferable whenever they flirt with them. 
Character A leaning in to kiss Character B… And then using that opportunity to tickle them when Character B’s guards are down. 
Them just laughing with each other at the dumbest shit until they’re out of breath; finding comfort and joy in each other’s company. 
Character A teasing Character B with how ticklish they are on certain spots. 
Character B tugging at the hem of Character A’s top, wanting to take it off, but Character A shakes their head and Character B immediately respects that by backing off a bit. (I’m including this because I don’t think people understand that any signs of no means no. Some people need to take notes for real)
“So… Are you going to stay over tonight?” “…Mm, maybe next time.” “You always say next time, though.” (EWLKNFWELN He really wanted me to stay, and I clearly folded so um pwnfewklnf) 
“I’m sorry if I’m like… Slow with all of this? I’m not experienced with any of this, and I don’t know what I’m doing. And I don’t think I’m ready for… You know.” “And that’s fine. Like I said, we’ll take it slow; we’ve got all the time in the world to get comfortable with each other, hm?” (WHEN I SAY I WAS GOING WEKJFNEWJKNEWFLN WHEN HE REASSURED ME, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AHHH)
Character B climbing back into bed after taking their morning shower to get more cuddles in with Character A before they have to go to work.
“You can just change in here if you want.” (WO4HKLWFN THIS FUCKING MAN LMFAOOO, the way I didn’t listen and went to the bathroom to change because I’m still feeling too embarrassed to change in front of him even though he’s kind of seen me topless before)
Hugging each other a little tighter, and Character A mumbling, “God, I really don’t want to leave” before they part ways.
“The way you keep running around in my mind everyday… How dare you?” Character A mumbles. “Well, is there a problem with that?” Character B questions with a chuckle. (I’m bold for this one, praise me LKNEFKLNWG)
The constant check ins from Character B, to make sure Character A’s all good and well. (every prompt list has this because it’s something I’ll always fucking harp on about lmao)
Character B grasping Character A’s wrists so they’d stop attacking their ticklish spots, pulling them in for a kiss instead. (He did this SO MANY TIMES AND FAILED SO MANY TIMES AHAHA, I’m a sneaky menace) 
Character A pulling the Spiderman kiss on Character B while Character B’s lying down. (I WANNA KISS HIM MORE FUCKSLKFNES’F)
Character A waking up in Character B’s clothes and in their bed, hair all mussed up and sporting a faint mark on their neck. (I think I uh… I think I like having marks on my neck?? Made by him, specifically, IDK wpeofnew;nf)
Get home safe! Love you lots and lots, Character B texts Character A. (THE WAY I SMILED WHEN I SAW HIS TEXT WHILE HEADING TO THE STATION AHAHA, it wasn’t even ten minutes since we parted and he sent me this and I was fangirling about it to my friends AHAHA) 
“Aren’t you going to get up now? You gotta get to work,” Character A says, poking Character B’s side. “Mmm, five more minutes,” Character B murmurs, pulling Character A closer to them. (HE’S SO CLINGY AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH AHDFOEKNF)
Character A realising they might actually be falling in love, slowly but surely, with Character B. (YEAH SO THIS IS A REVELATION AND A HALF AND IDK HOW TO FEEL ABOUT IT) 
5K notes · View notes
deadghosy · 9 months ago
Note
Mommy long legs reader or slender man reader x Hazbin hotel 🌚🌝
AHHHH I LOVE YOU MY GHOST ANONNNN! SLENDERMAN?? YOU FINNA BRING OUT MY CREEPYPASTA PHASEE🦆✨💗‼️‼️‼️
HAZBIN HOTEL X SLENDERMAN! READER
prompt: a faceless creature of the height of 10’5 (or 7’9 idk I got two different heights from safari lol) came to hell to serve one final purpose…get a damn job.
Tumblr media
Two words, scary tall…
So say your height was 10’5…
SHIT GON GET WICKEEDDDD!!!
Okay so I can see Charlie being scared staring at you as you just sit like a nice gentleman as your body doesn’t fit the whole seat… (y’know what, let’s go with 7’9…) you told Charlie you use to be a leader before you somehow came to this wrenched place
Charlie felt bad and gave you a job here so yon can stay. But she was confused when you said “somehow”’ as if you didn’t die as a Human…WAIT A MINUTE..DID YOU JUST TALK WITHOUT A MOU-
Lucifer looked up at you and was like….“What in the fucking nine circles…” and you two became friends because of how Lucifer put accessories on you like a Christmas tree
Y’know how people make slenderman wear reading glasses sometimes? That’s you. 😭 with your blind ass LMAOO (I also wear glasses dw…) But I can see you wear the glasses and residents be so confused because…you don’t have eyes for Christ out loud-
“Fuck you wearin' glasses for?” Husk said to you once as he caught you even reading a book…now he was more confused. “I’m reading…” “…..okay..” husk was so done with this buffoonery as you had no mouth and eyes. But yet you could still read, see, and fuckin talk? Yeah he must be drunk as hell itself…
You treat niffty just like how fanon slenderman treats Sally. That’s how I headcannon it.
I headcannon you to be the fanon version of slenderman rather the cannon version. Cause you being the fanon version is just sweet considering the chaos that can happen in the hotel and how you treat niffty.
I can see people thinking you are a new overlord as you had a stern aura around yourself as you had a proper straight walk as you held a high chin not showing any weaknesses.
“Woah….did you see that sinner get lit in flames…” “yeah I did.” It got so quiet so quick as angel gave you a confused face as you just stood there. 😭 Angel couldn’t tell if you were being fr or being a smartass
You were just sleeping on the couch, dead ass like a passed out beer dad after watching football. And fat nuggets sat in your lap sleeping. Then angel came and slept by you, then husk, then niffty, AND THEN EVERYONE JOINED 😭 big ass family cuddle💗💗🦆
You deadass could be the bodyguard of the hotel as you could escort a sinner who is trying to be an ass to the staff and you’re just like, “YEET!” And boom they are thrown away
You and Alastor definitely bond the most as you two got black tentacles. It’s just for Alastor it’s based on his powers when he uses his magic. But for you, it’s just your appearance as you use them to pierce your enemies. But mostly you use them when you are too bored to pick up objects with your hands
BIGGG headcannon that when slenderman do that static thingy, for you it clouds their vision and hearing as you make them pass out. Either to death or just to knock them out.
Lol I can imagine the whole creepypasta mansion going crazy while you drink tea like “this is fine” as you are in some other universe- 😭 crossover type shit
Like Drowned Ben is spam texting your phone like, “slender. slender. Help. Slendy. Octopus. Father. Help help.. help JeFF STABBED ME!”
And your tall ass is just sleeping as everything is going soooo peaceful in the hotel.
While we are at that, EJ definitely was using a book to try and to summon you with sally behind him hugging her teddy to see you again. Meanwhile Jeff was chasing Ben as he goes through a tv to hide from Jeff.
I imagine people in the hotel would hug you except for Alastor as he hates touch. But the people would dead ass hug you as one of your tentacles hold them.
You picked up angel, niffty , Charlie and Vaggie with your four tentacles as you read a book. It was a funny but cute sight as Charlie was like “:p” while the others had a cartoony ass expression or a blank one which is definitely Vaggie and husk
Adam and Lute definitely glanced at each other confused at what the fuck you were as you didn’t have a demonic or angelic aura. But you had some type of power in you. It was weird asf as you just stood there like “🧍🏾am I ugly?” They just kept staring at you
I can see you having the same expression as the picture above when you met pentious as you and Alastor was having tea just chilling with the hellish weather.
“Do you know that guy?” “I have no idea who that pest is my dear friend.” Alastor says with his usual smile as he hands you a cookie.
Just straight up tea times with Alastor is so peaceful as Alastor was kinda suspicious when you didn’t say anything if he ate a cannibalism meal. But I mean…slenderman! Reader is use to people being a cannibal.
The vees are definitely intrigued with who the hell you are and how powerful are you as you were the talk of pentagram city when you first came.
I headcannon a sinner tried to cut off your tentacles only to be grabbed by one of them and slammed to the ground. You just stood there and let static ring loudly in their head to the point it exploded.
2K notes · View notes
kitten4sannie · 9 months ago
Text
ᴅᴜɴɢᴇᴏɴ ᴄʀᴀᴡʟᴇʀ
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
ꜱᴇx ᴘᴏʟʟᴇɴ/ʙ���ᴋᴀᴋᴋᴇ ➠ ᴍɪɴꜱᴀɴʏᴜɴʜᴡᴀ
pairing: half orc! mingi x elf! reader (fem) x barbarian! san x goliath! yunho x tiefling! seonghwa
genre: fantasy au/dnd vibe, humor, gratuitous smut
summary: you go on a quest with a group of brutish, questionable individuals. anything for some gold and riches, right? 
w.c: 6.5k ish…..yeahhhh
the world’s longest list of warnings:  alcohol mention/usage, soft/hard! dom party members, brat in the streets baby in the sheets sub! reader, these mfs have a hard-on for social hierarchies esp mingi (he’s a big pervert too hehe), mxm (real homies jerk each other off), monster fucking (mimic box…listen i saw it in a porn one time and its been my dream to recreate it since okay sue meee take me to court!!), five?? some?? idk they made it work somehow, voyeurism/exhibitionism, praise/degradation, pet names, olfactophilia, aphrodisiacs, teasing, vast size differences, size kink, strength kink, manhandling, oral (receiving), overstim, tit play, bulge kink, handjob, blowjob, titjob, all the jobs actually, double penetration made possible with magic incantations <3, creampies, back shots, and facials for everyoneeee !! one for you!! and for youuu~~ also the word cock is mentioned at least 50 times in this one sorry bout that hshjs
a/n: hi ahhhh so this chaotic jumble of insanity is my baby 🥹 and it’s also my very first filth fest fic of the month !!! so yk what that means ;3 go on and strap in for me okay? it’s about to go down frfr <3 this is a sort of sequel to my half orc mingi fic but it can be read on its own! also i’ve never actually played dnd,, i’ve just heard about it from my brother so don’t expect an extremely accurate representation;;; i did do quite a bit of research tho <33 but yeah that being said…. rip reader’s elussy </3
Now Playing:
ᴅɪʀᴛʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋ ʙʏ ꜱᴛᴇᴇʟʏ ᴅᴀɴ
0:01 ❍─────── 3:01
Volume: ▁▂▃▄▅▆▇ 100%
ᴘʀᴇᴠ | ꜰꜰꜰ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ | ɴᴇxᴛ
Tumblr media
“Ladies and gents, now this is a quest that’s not for the faint of heart,” your local guild master announced, leaning his heavy forearms on the crowded bar table below him, stroking his long, bushy beard absentmindedly, the wood furnishing of the bar creaking underneath his weight. 
The lively room grew a bit more quiet, some individuals quirking their heads in the seasoned barbarian’s direction, yours included. “With a hefty 1000 gold pieces as your reward, this quest requires you to find and locate the rare lujuria plant, then bring its seeds back to me. Unfortunately for you lot, they’re only found in the abandoned dungeons near Mist Falls. Any takers?” 
At the mention of the plant and location, most of the interested individuals turned back to their ale and friends, resuming their loud, enthusiastic conversations. You, however, couldn’t believe how idiotic the other patrons were. You could do quite a lot with 1000 gold pieces, and being a solo adventurer, you wouldn’t even have to share it with anyone. With dollar signs in your eyes and a spring in your step, you headed up to the busy bar, having to get on your tippy toes and wave your hand around past some of the larger patron’s broad shoulders until the guild master noticed your presence. 
“Now, don’t tell me a dainty little high elf is interested in the quest I just announced. You gonna scare them off with your shiny hair and sparkly crystals?” the older man gruffed, letting out a hefty laugh, before taking a couple gulps from the oversized mug he held within his large, calloused hands.
When you simply stood there with your hands crossed over your lace-covered chest, the guild master set his mug down, his bushy eyebrows raising upwards. “Oh, you’re serious.” He leaned down to your level, cupping his hand around one side of his face, allowing you to smell the ale on his breath. “Do you know why no one likes to go to Mist Falls, little Miss?”
You shook your head, causing the small jewels that dangled from your silky hair to sway a bit. You cupped a hand around your own face, murmuring, “Why does no one like it, Mister?”
“There’s some strange wildlife that frequent the land there. Otherworldly things…things that an elf like you wouldn’t want to get wrapped up in,” he explained carefully, looking over the lens of his glasses to squint at you. “Unless, you’re into that sort of thing, of course.” 
Not understanding what he meant by his vague statement, you shrugged it off, taking his underestimation of your abilities as a challenge you couldn’t bear backing down from. “I’ll take the quest, Mister, and I’ll bring you those seeds.” 
The guild master smiled down at you, chuckling a bit, like you weren’t in on the joke that he was so amused by. “Very well, little Miss.” He handed you the rolled-up scroll, his lips still curled into a suspicious smile. “Good luck with your quest.” 
Taking the scroll, you nodded your head at him, a smug smile painting your own face, as you turned on your heels to leave, reveling in the fact that your levels of commitment and intelligence were clearly in the upper echelons compared to the rest of the idiots that frequented the crowded guild.  
Before you could leave without any issues, a deeply familiar, incredibly cocky-sounding baritone voice interrupted your mental victory dance. “Would you look at that. Gonna handle a dungeon all on your own, eh, princess?” 
You quickly turned your head, your eyes landing on the tall, solid beast of a half-man, half-orc standing with one hand resting on his leather-bound hip, his golden eyes slowly studying your body with an almost nauseating amount of interest. “Mingi…” you sighed, the events of your last few meetings flashing through your brain, the tips of your ears turning a faint red. “Oh, you think I can’t handle a stupid quest on my own either, huh?” 
He shook his head, his shaggy silver hair falling in his eyes, forcing him to swipe it out of the way with his large ringed fingers. “Nope.” His simple response encouraged his equally large, equally intimidating party members, who were hanging out near him, to laugh and chatter amongst themselves. 
Now your hands were on your hips, getting hit by a wave of annoyance, your cheeks burning.  “Watch me.” 
Mingi took a step towards you, just to show you and anyone nearby just how much he towered over you, his lips quirking up into a shit-eating grin, still peering down at your body like he could already picture what you looked like without the form-fitting lace dress that was wrapped around your curvy body like a pretty present, one that he wanted to open as soon as possible.
“With a petite little body like yours?” He reached down to slip a finger into your hair, playing with one of the crystals that adorned it. “Yeah, so small and delicate, like a pretty little fairy, ain’t ya? Those monsters in that dungeon will swallow you whole.”
You might’ve hated Mingi to an extent, but he was good. Good at making you feel tiny and desirable, and so wet, you were afraid he’d be able to smell it from where he was standing. You closed your thighs together slightly, lowering your closed fists to your sides, leaning forward. “I-i’m not a fairy, you dumb orc! I'm an elf! And I don’t need your help!” Just as you turned around to leave, Mingi cleared his throat, making you turn your head back to glare at him. 
He placed his other hand on his hip, letting his weight shift to the opposite side, his head tilting the other way. “Sweetheart, listen, I know you’re very capable of getting what you want,” he mused, chuckling softly at the way your face scrunched up slightly in embarrassment. “But, I’m sure you could use some extra party members to back you up. Me and the boys want to help you. Won’t you let us?”
You gazed at Mingi a little while longer, before your eyes shifted to his friends, first drawn to the most elegant-looking tiefling you’ve ever seen. He had sleek skin that looked like expensive marble, his hair as white as the frost that would cover all the lands during the winter months, his heavy horns ridged and curled into an ‘s’ shape, and black as soot, his thin, pointed tail quietly slithering around in a snake-like motion behind the long black cloak that hung from his pointed shoulders. 
“That’s Seonghwa,” Mingi informed, with his arms folded across his wide tattooed chest. “Doesn’t talk much, unless it’s to cast a spell or call me stupid.” 
Seonghwa’s pretty lips formed a smirk, wrapping his arms comfortably around his slim, corseted waist, his sharp, milky eyes focused intensely on you, like he was peering through you and straight into your soul. 
“Oh, are we introducing ourselves?” someone said excitedly, your eyes following the voice upwards until they landed on the handsome face of the gentle-looking goliath standing besides the tiefling. At roughly seven feet tall, the broad man sported shiny, golden locks, pretty brown eyes, and a tribal tattoo that was plastered on his veiny neck, clad only in a thick pelt that sat comfortably around his solid waist, wearing matching furry cuffs on his thick forearms. “I’m Yunho! I like to get drunk and smash stuff. What do you like to do, elf girl?” The goliath stepped forward to shake your hand, his hand completely encompassing yours, your neck almost hurting from having to look up at him. 
“Hi, Yunho,” you replied, smiling softly, feeling a bit dizzy from your vast difference in sizes. Everything about him was just so big, you couldn't help but wonder what else was too. “I’m Y/N. I like to go on quests and collect gold.” 
“Don’t tell me we’re actually going to help a high elf,” the last party member interrupted in a low voice, sneering, showing off his large, rounded canines when you looked past Yunho to scoff at him. “And an annoying one, at that. I don’t care if she’s fuckable. This is still a waste of time.”
Yunho put a large, warm hand on your shoulder, covering it completely. “Don’t take San’s words seriously, sweet. He bullies people when he likes them.” 
The brooding barbarian folded his arms over the thick, furry pelt that covered his broad upper half, rolling his eyes, a few strands of his wild raven hair falling past his forehead. “Or maybe I just don’t like stuck-up little elven brats, ever think of that, Yunho?” His pronounced eyebrows joined together in a bout of sudden fury. “Huh? Can you even hear me up there, you oversized son of a bitch?”
A faint blush appeared on Yunho’s cheeks, smiling in San’s direction, before looking back down at you. “See? He loves me.” 
You returned his smile with a grimace. “He loves being a dickhead too, apparently.”
“Excuse me?!” San growled, about to walk up to the both of you to prove that he only loved moonshine, his trusty club, and himself. 
Mingi stepped in front of San, waving his hands around exasperatedly, wishing someone presented a dialogue skip option a long time ago, bored of the introductions. “Alright, alright, so are you coming with us, or not, princess? What’s the verdict?”
You rolled your eyes, opening the large entrance door of the guild, eventually letting out a long sigh, glancing back over your shoulder with a pout. You knew you had a slim chance of surviving without them, but you still had your pride. You let out a small hmph, annoyed when they still all just stood there waiting, encouraging you to stomp your silk shoe down on the ground, grumbling, “Ugh, are you coming, or what?”
Mingi and his friends chuckled amongst themselves and elbowed each other, amused by the amount of fiery zealousness your tiny body possessed, finishing their mugs of ale, eventually following you out of the guild and onto the dirt road. 
“Hurry up! I wanna explore this dungeon today, not during the next winter solstice!” you called out to them, already at the forest entrance, tossing your head back in an exaggeratedly annoyed fashion.
The half-orc waved his hand around nonchalantly, despite his large lower canines growing more and more visible the more he began to smile, pulling out a small pair of lace panties that had a familiar design etched into them. “Yeah, yeah, don’t get your little elf panties in a twist,” he chuckled, bringing them up to his face to take a sniff.
Your inquisitive expression melted down into one of horror, then scrunched again, this time pleading him with his eyes. “Mingi…don’t tell me you’ve kept those all this time.”
“Of course I have, princess. In fact, I jerk off with them every chance I can in your honor. I can cum real hard just from knowing I turned a high elf onto orc cock forever. I still remember like it was yesterday,” he sighed dreamily, wiping away a fake tear, like had just said the most romantic sentence even known to orckind.
“I still fuck elves, you twat! I don’t need you or your stupid orc cock!” you argued, turning away so that none of them could see how flushed you had gotten, heading into the forest by yourself.
“That’s a damn lie. You showed up to my hut like three times during the Great Hunt not too long ago,” Mingi explained, following after you, his friends following beside him. “Don’t you remember? I had to carry you home after you passed out from squirting too hard.”
“No!” you shouted from ahead of him, swearing you were going to melt into the floor.
“She’s got elven pride, that one,” Mingi sighed, admiring you from behind. “Anyway, I got her soaked panties to prove it. You want to see them, don’t ya, Hwa?” Mingi elbowed Seonghwa, who just shook his head in disappointment, while he continued smiling truimphantly to himself.
࿏࿏࿏
Your group took on a range of opponents, from skeleton armies to disingenuous slime cubes that you may or may not have fallen into, able to pass through quite a few levels of the dungeon, mostly due to Seonghwa’s spell casting abilities, San’s uncontrollable rage, Yunho’s knack of destroying anything he came in contact with, and Mingi’s axe-wielding skills. Did you want to admit that to yourself? Sure. Out loud? No, of fucking course not. 
You picked off bits of pink slime that still clung to your wet form, grumbling under your breath about how sticky you felt, not even noticing that some of the slime had already absorbed into your skin. 
“Need a little help there, princess?” Mingi mused, reaching down to your shoulder and wiping off some of the slime for you, his fingers tingling once he had done so. 
“I suppose so,” you murmured, standing still so that he could continue helping you, surprisingly not even that bothered when the other members of your newfound party all gathered around you and picked or pulled off the remnants of slime that remained on your body, face, and hair. 
As you entered the next room, all five of you noticed how the tinglyness remained, how it spread throughout your bodies like a gentle ripple effect, your bodies now collectively hot to the touch, though no one said anything to each other — at least, not yet, anyway. 
“A chest!” you gasped excitedly, putting your dagger back into its respective holder and running up to the large, gold-plated chest that sat at the edge of the room, just waiting for someone to open it up and collect its contents. 
“Don’t be stupid, elven brat. Not all chests are filled with treasure. Some of them could be decoys. You know that, right?” San rested the rounded bottom of his ginormous club down onto the dungeon floor, leaning on it, raising an eyebrow at you. “Or do you only familiarize yourself with crystals and orc cock?” 
“Shut up!” You held onto the barbarian’s insult, rather than hearing him out. “You’re just saying that because you want the treasure for yourself!” You got on your knees in front of the chest, muttering, “Selfish prick.” 
“What’d you say?!” San barked, his hand squeezing around the thick handle of his weapon. 
Mingi slung an arm around San’s tense shoulders, smiling as though he was quite pleased with himself. “She’s got a mouth on her, huh?” He met San’s grimace with a shoulder squeeze. “Don’t worry, Sannie. She’s gonna learn the hard way.” 
Yunho walked up beside Seonghwa, lowering himself down to sit on the cool stone ground with a thud, wiping a bit of perspiration that had formed on his forehead. “I’ve been feeling weird since we left the slime room, Hwa. Can you cast a healing spell?” 
“Yeah, me too, now that you mention it,” Mingi called out, rubbing his sweat-covered neck with his free hand, encouraging San to open his own black furry coat, revealing an expanse of sweaty, tan, tattooed skin underneath it. 
Seonghwa nodded his head in agreement, waving his hand around in front of him, manifesting a large glowing violet pentagram into existence, which eventually disappeared after the spell had be casted completely, a faint glow still visible around the edges of your bodies. 
“Mm, I don’t really feel any different…” Mingi mumbled, his hot-blooded body even more tingly than before, starting to feel like he could fuck someone into oblivion right at that moment, even more than usual. 
Once you had opened up the chest, ignoring the subsequent pounding inside your chest and cunt, you were met by a multitude of shiny, gold coins just waiting for you to take. “Holy shit, I’m rich!” 
“You better split that with us, before I split you in half with my cock, stupid elf!” San griped from where he stood, now a bit hunched over, his words slightly slurred, not even fully realizing what he was saying. 
“Wh-what?!” you squeaked, your ears bright red, turning your head to look at the barbarian in disbelief, not even noticing when the chest in front of you began to sprout limbs, a long, slimy tongue slipping out past the gold. 
“I said, I’ll split you open–” San fully dropped his club, which resulted in a resounding thud inside the small room. He pointed an accusatory finger in your direction, blinking at you through his hazy vision, using his other hand to grab at himself through his furry kilt. “–with my big, barbarian cock!” 
Yunho pointed at you as well, wanting you to notice the big monster that was about to have its way with you. “Um, Y/N, you should…” 
“Not now, Yunho, I have to tell this idiot barbarian to suck my clit!” you informed angrily, holding your middle finger up at San, which he returned enthusiastically. 
“Oh, yeah? Then, get your fucking ass over here and sit on my face, you elf slut,” San barked back, sticking his tongue out at you, still holding onto Mingi, appearing drunker by the second — though it wasn’t alcohol running rampant through his body. It was lust. The rest of them were feeling it too. 
“Slut? I’ll show you slut,” you grumbled, about to stand up and give San a piece of your mind, your fist, and possibly your body when the mimic suddenly snatched you up with its long limbs and pinned you to the floor. “Oh my god, what’s happening? What the fuck is that?!” 
San simply chuckled, leaning his back against the cold concrete wall of the small room, trying to cool his intensely heated body down. “That’s a mimic, dummy. I’m sure you can handle it though, since you’re so tough.” 
Mingi looked to his friends, biting at his lip, noticing that none of them even attempted to assist you, more concerned with finding out what the monster was about to do to you. Even Yunho, who was the only one with any semblance of a conscience out of the entire party, somehow couldn’t bring himself to get up, instead answering to the oversized tent that was forming underneath his pelt. 
The mimic pinned your wrists together above your head with one strong hand, using the other to lift one of your legs up into the air, breathing harshly as it studied your slick cunt through your tiny lace panties, eventually licking a long stripe up your body, from your pussy up to your chest, leaving your white garments completely soaked and see-through. 
Trying desperately to free your hands from the monster’s unwavering grip, unable to prevent more slick from leaking out of you with your legs being held open, you angled your head back to look at the upside-down versions of your party, crying out, “Are you fuckers just going to sit there and watch?!” 
“Yeah…we are, sweetheart,” Mingi sighed out, still leaning on San, a few drops of sweat cascading down his flushed face. He dragged his tongue across his teeth, breathing in the flowery scent of your arousal, inhaling so deeply his bull ring shifted slightly. “I’m sure you got it handled. Just tire it out with that wet fucking cunt of yours, will ya?” 
A strong wave of pleasure pulsed through your body at Mingi’s response, looking to each of the members, realizing that they were really just going to observe as you got pleasured by the monster, getting more aroused by the second. What was wrong with you? You would’ve contemplated it more, but any thoughts you had would completely fizzle out once the mimic’s tongue came in contact with your cunt, licking you up and down in a rapid, desperate fashion. Its tongue was so heavy and hot against your pulsing cunt, you couldn’t help but cum within a few minutes, your body going limp. “Fuuuck, oh my god…” 
“Came nice and hard, didn’t you?” Mingi continued to share his filthy words with you and his party, all five of you reacting positively to it. “I can fucking smell it, princess…” His smile twisted into a faux pout, his voice dripping with lust. “That tongue isn’t enough for you though, is it? Mm-mm, not nearly enough. You need cock stuffed inside your tight elven pussy, don’t you, darlin’?”
All you could do was let out a long pathetic whine, your flushed, fucked-our face giving Mingi and the boys the answer they needed. Now that you weren’t fighting back, the mimic lifted your lower half up into the air, positioning you so that its tongue could slither inside you, pistoning it in and out of your willing hole, your upper half hanging upside down, your tits bouncing with each of the mimic’s thrusts of its wet appendage, your writhing body on display for your party members’ viewing pleasure. “I’m…going to…kill you all…for watching…” you huffed out in between moans, drool slipping out past your parted lips. 
Mingi turned his head to share looks with his friends, all of them now dealing with the same almost painful predicament. “Are you all as hard as I am…?” When they nodded, he felt a little less guilty, reaching down to rub at his leaking cock through his kilt, able to feel how stiff it was even through the thick material. He gazed down at you, biting at his bottom lip, holding onto the thick leather of his body harness, trying not to blow his load too quickly. “It feels good, doesn’t it, princess? I can hear how just how sloppy that mess of a cunt is…Do you like the way it’s fucking you senseless with its tongue? Is it filling you up just right?” 
You couldn’t believe just how turned on you were in the moment, hardly about to breathe in between your bouts of pleasure, your body beginning to sieze up when the mimic shoved its tongue as deep as it could go, causing a prominent bulge to form inside your lower stomach. “S-so good, Min, gonna cum again…” 
“Cum for us, baby, that’s it…” Mingi sighed, leaning his shoulder against San’s, noticing how he began to play with his cock through his kilt, doing his friend a solid and reaching over to stroke the base of it for him. 
Groaning underneath his breath, San reached over to help Mingi out as well, the both of them hyperfixated on the way the mimic drank up your juices as though it needed it to live. Seonghwa and Yunho were in a similar position, but instead of answering to their aching cocks, they simply watched on, the visual stimulation clearly enough for them. 
The mimic lifted your limp body upwards so that you were on your knees, with its large, agile tongue fitted in between your trembling thighs, grabbing you by the waist so that it could drag you back and forth along its long, slimy appendage. “Just like that, oh my god, it’s so–fuck–” you gasped, barely able to look at the men that were huddled around you, the new position not allowing you to hide away from their hungry gazes, your body on full display for them. 
With his hand now fully hidden underneath San’s kilt, Mingi nodded his head at you in approval. “That’s my naughty little elf girl,” he praised you in a gravelly voice, groaning at the sensation of San tugging at his dripping cock from underneath his own pelt. “Let me see you cum one more time for us, princess. Can you do that?” 
“Yes, Mingiii, I’ll cum for you,” you whined obediently, reaching down your shiny, wet body to rub your clit around through your thin, soaked panties, unable to keep your mouth closed anymore from how hard you were breathing. 
“What a good listener you are, baby. Look at you playing with your tiny little clit without me having to ask. Such a good elf girl you are,” Mingi continued to praise you, knowing exactly what made you tick, his hand squeezing around San’s throbbing length. 
San let out a higher pitched moan, his body beginning to tremble against Mingi’s. “I can’t believe you–unnh–managed to tame her so easily…” 
“It wasn’t hard, Sannie…fuck– She may be a brat, but she’s a good girl at heart…” Mingi was beginning to fall apart as well, San’s calloused hand continually rubbing along his cock enhancing the pleasure of watching you willingly playing with yourself while you rode a monster’s tongue, his party’s presence filling him with even more warmth. “Cum for us, sweetheart, show us how pretty you are when you fall apart…” 
Mingi’s praise-filled request mixed with the sensation of your puffy clit grinding along the mimic’s slick tongue sent you barreling over the edge, cumming so hard, you saw stars, barely able to grasp at the dagger that still sat inside its holster.
Meanwhile, San and Mingi both began to groan and shudder against the cool dungeon wall, shooting their hot loads onto each other’s hands and the insides of their pelts. Seonghwa and Yunho both coated their own undergarments with white, biting into their bottom lips so hard they just about broke the skin.
They were all so deep in their wells of ecstasy that they hardly even noticed when you let out a war cry and stabbed the mimic with your long dagger, rendering it dead, causing it to fade away in a flurry of sparkly, white dust, leaving a few gold pieces for you to take. 
“I told you I could fucking take care of myself,” you grimaced, shoving your items into a small pouch you had hanging from your upper thigh.
Once the post-nut clarity set in, Mingi cleared his dry throat, scratching at his prickly chin. “I mean, you did defeat the mimic on your own, so credit is due when credit is due, princess. You just used your pussy to combat it…which is just as valid as using a real weapon, don’t get me wrong–”
“Shut it!” you simply yelled, your face so hot, it probably rivaled the surface of the sun, stomping past the recovering men and pushing the next door open once it unlocked itself, wasting no time to enter the last floor of the dungeon where the supposed lujuria plant was said to grow. 
“Let’s go help her out with that plant. And remember, whatever happens, happens. Just know I’m not fucking any of you.” Mingi patted San’s shoulder, looking over to the other members of his party with a playful smile.
San smacked Mingi’s back playfully, which Mingi returned. “Let’s put that elf brat in her place.”
Mingi nodded. “Yeah, on my cock where she belongs.”
Seonghwa scoffed from beside them. “Could you be anymore crass?”
Yunho patted Mingi’s and Seonghwa’s shoulders, practically dislocating them, smiling goofily, his cheeks and face flush from the energy he exerted.  “What happens in the dungeon, stays in the dungeon, boys.”
Seonghwa quietly nodded his head in agreement, until he murmured softly, “Indeed.” 
࿏࿏࿏
“Where are you, you stupid fucking plant?” you called out inside the vast, foliage-covered room, swiping at the overgrown leaves and plants that were in your way, almost tripping over a few vines that grew in and out of the broken-up cobblestone floor below your feet. 
The rest of your party followed your lead, Mingi and Yunho taking the initiative to cut down the thicker plants and foliage that stood in your way with their axes, almost completely out of breath when you finally came across a large pink plant growing in the middle of the room. 
“I’m assuming that’s it,” you said mostly to yourself, slowly walking up to the plant, impressed by its intricate petals and inviting flowery scent. “It’s not as scary as I thought it’d be. It’s almost…pretty…” 
Just as you reached out to touch it, Seonghwa opened his mouth to warn, “Wait, don’t–”
As soon as your slender fingers came in contact with one of the flower petals, the plant sent out a puff of dusty pink pollen directly into your face and the air around your party, before folding in on itself and growing comically large spikes to protect its core which contained the golden glowing seeds you needed to complete your quest. 
You began choking and coughing along with the others, reaching out blindly through the thick pollen, finding solace in Seonghwa’s arms, who began reciting a spell to lessen the effects of the plant’s attempt at self defense, but it was too late. Mind-altering desire had already set in. “Can’t breathe…can’t think…” you whispered, grabbing at Seonghwa’s chest, unbuckling his top and revealing his smooth, marble skin, henna-like tattoos decorating his jewelry-adorned collar bone. 
Seonghwa clutched your shoulders, breathing just as profusely as you were, murmuring, “Don’t think, then, silly elf,” before pressing his mouth onto yours with haste, his long, snake-like tongue slipping inside your mouth to explore it.
Strong, solid hands grabbed at your hips from behind, Mingi pulling them back so that he could grind his cock into your ass, his lips already ghosting along your neck. His deep, gravelly voice made you let out a weak moan into Seonghwa’s mouth when he sighed, “Gonna fill your cunt full of my cum, sweetheart. So fucking full.” 
“Then, I get to fill her slutty elf cunt with my tongue first,” San interrupted, already on his knees, positioning himself in between you and Seonghwa, not hesitating to tear your skirt and panties apart to access your rapidly dripping cunt. “So pink, so pretty…” He attached his drooling mouth onto your clit, sucking so roughly, your knees almost buckled underneath you, about to completely collapse when he plugged your hole up with his hot tongue. 
Seonghwa pulled away slightly, finally letting you breathe without having his tongue down your throat, instead completely shredding  the front of your dress with his talons, just in time for Mingi to groan and cup your tits, squeezing and moving them around, saliva leaking past his plump lips. “I always know exactly what your idiotic orc brain is thinking,” he sighed at Mingi, bringing his own hands up to tweak and pinch at your nipples, making you cry out. 
“Oh, yeah? Can you read my mind right now, Hwa? Can you tell that I’m about to stretch this elf’s little fuckhole wide open with my fat fuckin’ cock?” he said near your twitching, elongated ear, his hard length slipping in between your thighs to rub along the underside of your cunt, his dark eyes settled on Seonghwa’s before returning to your slick body, their hands moving in tandem to play with your tits, each getting a chance to squeeze your squishy flesh and tease your increasingly puffy nipples. 
Yunho, who was hard beyond measure and feeling a little left out, walked up to the side of you and reached down to show off his enormous cock, the slick , oversized tip an angry shade of red. He pouted down at you, letting out a small whimper. “Can you please help me out, sweet? I’m so hard, it hurts…” 
Unable to resist his puppy-dog eyes, you nodded, licking your lips, collecting his vast amounts of pre-cum at the rounded tip with your fingers, eventually using it to slick up the rest of his cock, doing your best to jerk him off with your small hands. “Does that feel good, Yunho?” 
“So good, doll,” he gasped, leaning his head back, not registering when he began to thrust his hips forward into your hands, using them like a fleshlight. 
You’re so big, Yunho, fuck– I can hardly wrap my hands around it…” you sighed out, opening your mouth to lick at the tip of his cock each time he thrusted into your hands. Your mind went blank, until you suddenly remembered that San was in between your squeezing thighs, devouring your cunt like it was his last meal, his tongue and lips wreaking havoc on your clit, his thick fingers shoved inside your pulsing hole.
“Like the way I’m eating this cunt of yours, eh, elf girl?” San mumbled in between slurps, gulping your juices down, a few dribbles of it cascading down his veined throat. “You don’t even need to answer, love. I can tell you do just from the way you’re fuckin’ squeezin’ my fingers.” San groaned deeply, watching the way you dripped for him as he continually went knuckles-deep inside you, biting his bottom lip, growling, “Cum for me. Cum all over my face, you brat. Fuckin’ do it.”
You unraveled almost instantaneously, getting your creaminess sucked off of your slit by the desperate barbarian, not even noticing that he had been jerking himself off so roughly, he had already made himself cum before you did. 
“Goddamn it, since when did high elf squirt taste so fuckin’ good?” San mumbled drunkenly to himself, licking at his swollen lips, prior to sucking your cum from his fingers noisily.
“You’ve had your fun, Sannie boy. It’s time for this little elf girl to experience the pleasure of getting broken in by real men. Hwa, you know what to do,” Mingi announced hastily, already bringing you down to the floor so that you were about to slowly take the half-orc’s cock in your cunt from behind, Seonghwa supporting your front, the tip of his tail already brushing back and forth over your swollen clit, rubbing his large, ridged cockhead on your puffy lips to slick them up with his pre-cum, his own plump lips moving at a quick pace, expertly reciting an incantation that would allow you to physically take two obscenely large cocks at once, all well as increasing your natural lubricant and allowing you access to heightened physical sensations.
“Fuck, look at you…What a good little elf girl you are, taking us both inside you like this,” Mingi sighed into your ear, reaching around your body to lazily rub your wetness into your sensitive clit. “Almost like you were made to take monster cock, huh? Not made for little elven peckers, it seems.” He pressed his hand into your lower abdomen, able to feel the pronounced outline of his friend’s abnormally large length. “Mm, that’s right. You loved being stuffed full of monster cock, don’t you, sweetheart?”
“Love it, Min, so much,” you choked out, your mind going positively blank, the only thing on your mind being the insanely pleasurable stretch you felt inside your core, knowing you were quite literally filled to the brim. “Feels so good, I can’t think.”
“Why think when you can just feel good, princess?” he chuckled, rubbing your tummy in an up and down motion, feeling the outline of Seonghwa’s thick, ridged length with his calloused fingers, shuddering from the sensation of their slippery cocks rubbing along one another inside your tight, slick walls . He nuzzled your neck and the side of your face with his prickly cheek, whispering onto your skin, “M’ so proud of you, sweetheart. I broke you in before and now here you are, taking big tielfing cock in your pussy while an orc’s stuffing you just as full. What a pretty sight you are. Wish I could take a picture.”
“Oh my god, Mingi, please, it’s so–” you could hardly verbalize, your eyes just about rolling into your skull, your body pulsing with so much pleasure, you could barely keep up with what was happening around you.
Mingi routinely filled your elongated ears with more filthy words, Seonghwa gazing deeply at you, your willing hole continuing to clench around their thrusting cocks, getting stretched so pleasurably, you almost passed out from that sensation alone.
All the while, San positioned himself in from of your tits, squeezing them together and driving his cock back and forth between them, grunting and groaning each time.
Yunho gently grabbed your chin, coaxing your mouth open as wide as it would go, whispering, “That’s it, my sweet, just a little wider…” He began to feed you his cock, stuffing your mouth full and instinctively fucking your throat, your jaw already beginning to ache from the obscene girth. “You’re so tiny…can barely take it…huh?” Moaning breathily, Yunho eventually settled for fucking the inside of your gummy cheek, afraid that he would suffocate you if he continued to throat fuck you.
It seemed that this quartet had been in this exact position before. That was clear to you now. You couldn't have been more wet and willing if you tried. Getting used by two filthy men while two more watched and desperately tried to get off using your body in any way they could filled you with a sense of purpose you didn’t realize you had always sought after. 
“You want our cum in your pretty elf cunt, princess?” Mingi huffed, in between harsh, deliberate thrusts, his hands cemented on the reappearing bulge in your stomach. “Huh? You want us to make a mess of you, aye? Want to be fucked so full of our seed, you’ll give us pretty elven offspring?” 
Once Yunho freed your saliva-streaked mouth from his suffocating length and resorted to jerking himself off, you were able to reply in a fucked-out, slurred voice, “Yeah–yeah–yeah– fill me up, wan’ it all. All your cum, in me, on me, I need it, pleaseee.” 
Your willing party members’ highs all crescendoed in succession, Mingi resorting to sloppy, rough thrusts inside your tight hole until he spilled most of his load into you, his cum splashing onto Seonghwa’s cock, dripping along their lengths to form a milky rim. “Oh, fuck, that’s it…but I’m not done yet, princess…I gotta–nngh–leave my mark on my favorite elf…” He slowly pulled out with lewd pop, coaxing a few more cum shots out of his cock with a large, closed fist, watching the large milky droplets slide along your smooth skin and torn sections of your dress onto the curve of your exposed ass, his eyes creasing with clear adoration. “That’s more like it…”
“W-was that necessary…?” you murmured, trying not to cum just from the sensation of getting stuffed full of cum, sensing that Seonghwa was next in line to come undone inside you.
“Oh, my gods, I…see heaven,” Seonghwa gasped sharply, the whites of his boundless eyes glowing brightly, his lips parting to allow a shaky moan to escape. Seonghwa gripped your hips so tightly, he was bound to leave handprints, relying on slow, deliberate strokes, using your contracting cunt to milk the cum from his cock, unable to resist leaving a few drops on your clit and mound when he pulled out.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, gonna cum all over these tits, you little elven slut, take itttt,” San gritted his teeth, his jaw tightening, only having to pump himself between your slick, pre-cum covered tits once more before he was able to leave thick spurts of white all over the bottom of your heated face and lips, leaving most of his load on your messy tits.
“O-oh, godddd…!” Yunho came last, and the most, closing his hands around his reddened tip, whining profusely, unable to keep himself from completely unloading all over your pretty face and hair, practically drenching you in his cum. 
Mingi reached down to cup your chin, tilting your head back so that he could get a good look at you, admiring the way their collective seed dripped off and out of you, swearing he could shed a tear from such a beautiful sight. “Look at you. My pretty princess.”
You gently nuzzled his large hand, smiling contentedly, tasting the salt of someone’s load on your lips when you licked at them. “Your pretty princess…” 
It took a while for all of you to come down and catch your breath, the effects of the pollen still practically running through your veins, but you managed to wobble your way over to the main plant and slowly pull your trusty dagger out of its holder, slashing the plant until its precious seeds dropped into your open palm. You looked down at the golden, glowing seeds, your fingers still splattered with milky liquid, reminding you of the trials you conquered to get to your ultimate goal. As you wiped your sticky face with your sleeve, you looked around at your panting, much more docile party members, wondering if it was all worth it. 
Mingi brushed some of his sweaty hair out of his eyes, noticing the way you were looking up at him, sending a cocky smile your way. “So, you’re 200 gold pieces richer, princess. How does it feel?” 
“Huh?” you questioned immediately, your fingers closing around the pouch that contained the precious lujuria seeds. “It was 1000 gold pieces. Did fucking me stupid render you stupid instead?” 
“I’m sorry, darlin’, but with each party member fee, it rounds out at 200 a person,” he corrected you, bringing you in to give you a gentle hug and a pat on the ass, chuckling delightedly to himself, his friends joining in on the amusement. “That’s still quite a bit. You can buy yourself a pretty new dress since yours is all torn and drenched in our cum, ya’ know?” He leaned his head in your direction, twiddling his large thumbs, his smile growing more lewd. "That means I can have the one you're wearing right now, yeah?"
You grimaced, your blood boiling over, already stomping your way out of the last dungeon floor, your voice still growing louder and louder the further you walked away, swearing to yourself, “This is the last time I do anything with you, Mingi! Never again. Never! EVER!” 
Mingi simply waved off at his friend’s questioning gazes, holding the seeds that you had taken from the plant inside his own hand, admiring their shimmering edges. “Don’t worry. She always comes back.” 
Tumblr media
fff taglist: @itza-meee @chnt1 @k-hotchoisan @wonyobie @vampiregirl215 @yuyusbunny @christmastodoroki @luvt0kki @pieyoon @goldnhwa @choisanboobenthusiast @icyb3rry @maximofftrash @choism @yunhosmelonbar @nebulousbookshelf @astayinwonderland @slutologyy @10nantscompanion @ddaeing @pandagirl-016 @Randomgirl11-posts @staytiny816 @horanghae8 @smally97 @ateezzzser @crispybaguettes @bubblegumbird @midnightmaja @i2nsstuff @asimpelslut @svt-dinosaurus @wisejudgedragonhairdo @deathbyyeekies @firefox79 @wildesreblogs @everyonewooeverywhere @raspberrysannie @Whatintheninerealms @hyunjinsbby (if i couldn’t tag you pls check your privacy settings <3)
Apply for the taglist here ⇢ ♡
© kitten4sannie, 2024.
2K notes · View notes
astonmartinii · 1 year ago
Text
honey, honey [mamma mia part three] | formula one social media au
drivers: sebastian vettel, fernando alonso & jenson button
mamma mia | no more ace to play | masterlist | tips
yourusername
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by jensonbutton, charles_leclerc and 1,098,455 others
tagged: fernandoalo_oficial, sebastianvettel & jensonbutton
yourusername: little chick is finally showing and these old men are still obsessed with cars even though i'm RIGHT THERE !!
view all comments
user1: oh to be the one receiving those photos of fernando
user2: yeah yeah they're having a kid BUT the sheer amount of seb + fernando + jenson content we're gonna get
fernandoalo_oficial: so you go to goodwood with them but don't come to my race :(
yourusername: babe they outnumbered you but we'll be there in canada !!
jensonbutton: sorry some of us didn't choose to be a fossil in an f1 car. just hurry up and retire
yourusername: woah woah, let nando have his lil hobby
fernandoalo_oficial: y/n tell him he can't call me old
yourusername: jenson, fernando isn't a fossil, you know we prefer the term precious artefact, please apologise
jensonbutton: i'm sorry???
user3: omg this is going so fast
danielricciardo: ahhhh y/n is showing !! this is so exciting
sebastianvettel: chickie is the size of a lemon i think
danielricciardo: and you'll all be in canada?
yourusername: yes! i can't wait to meet all of you
danielricciardo: *can't wait to meet chickie's god father
fernandoalo_oficial: daniel you know we haven't decided that yet
jensonbutton: also i've partied with you, why do you think i'd trust you with my kid?
danielricciardo: ummm every child is entitled to a fun uncle ??
user4: i am once again stating how fucking obsessed i am with this set up
yourusername
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by mickschumacher, jensonbutton and 1,298,450 others
yourusername: my personal favourite snippets of the god father applications. not sure it really made me trust any of them any more than before.
view all comments
user5: i was not expecting to actually see the applications but they defo didn't disappoint
maxverstappen1: ummmmm @charles_leclerc what do you mean? you are the instigator YOU pushed me into that puddle
charles_leclerc: it's okay max get it out (@sebastianvettel @fernandoalo_oficial @jensonbutton see how i am able to de- escalate this situation)
maxverstappen1: try and de-escalate this foot up your literal ass
charles_leclerc: i will put you in time out (i.e. watch your ass going into turn one)
yourusername: you guys realise this is not helping the application right?
maxverstappen1: nuh uh who wouldn't want a world champion as a god father
charles_leclerc: low blow verstappen
yourusername: girlies chickie has dads with seven championships between them so i really don't think she'll be impressed by two
user6: i'm sorry but roscoe hamilton as the reference is killing me
user7: full government name and everything
sebastianvettel: you guys laughed at me but this has amused me to no end
yourusername: you're a genius and i love you for this
user8: L BOMB?
jensonbutton: i take back calling the idea dumb, you were right :(
sebastianvettel: oh how the tables have turned
fernandoalo_oficial: can we all just agree that we never thought those dumbasses would actually fill one in?
yourusername: it makes me even more excited to meet them
jensonbutton: trust me the charm wears off real quick
user9: the way kimi wrote nothing and will probably end up being the god father anyway
Tumblr media
jensonbutton
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by fernandoalo_oficial, alexalbon and 832,087 others
tagged: yourusername
jensonbutton: best thing about pregnancy cravings is i have an excuse to use seb's insane car collection and brush up on my french
view all comments
user13: on dad duty with the dad angle he's ready
user14: honestly my heart is so warm over the fact that they've all embraced the situation
user15: girl we saw jenson and nando at mclaren together ... it's been coming
user16: oh and that one podium with jenson and seb they just need a girl they all liked to get their shit together and that's the most them thing ever
sebastianvettel: a man goes to one meeting and suddenly julie is being taken on grocery runs
jensonbutton: y/n wanted bagels so ?
sebastianvettel: i know we're having an actual kid but be careful with my mechanical kids as well
jensonbutton: do you forget i'm literally a driver too honey
yourusername: thanks for the bagel baby bagel dates 4 ever
fernandoalo_oficial: cream cheese and salmon WITHOUT ME?
yourusername: we put it in the fridge for when you get home :(
fernandoalo_oficial: awwwww really ???
yourusername: we love you (but also you can't eat soft cheese or raw fish while pregnant)
fernandoalo_oficial: it's the thought that counts?
user17: god this looks like domestic bliss, how does one come about three men to have a kid with in the swiss mountains?
yourusername: honestly i'm so lucky
sebastianvettel: we're luckier
jensonbutton: we're luckier
fernandoalo_oficial: we're luckier
yourusername: fucking hormones are making me ball my eyes out
Tumblr media Tumblr media
f1
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by estebanocon, yourusername and 1,239,086 others
f1: category is ... baby presents !! y/n y/ln made her paddock debut with sebastian vettel and jenson button to support fernando alonso 💚
view all comments
user21: omg seb in his aston martin gear to support nando
user22: imagine showing this to someone in 2010 i think they would have a heart attack
danielricciardo: i had the best present ever god father is in the bag
charles_leclerc: i read your application there's no way, plus seb loves ferrari so my gift will be the best
mickschumacher: lets be real my application was the best
estebanocon: eh i think kimi's was the best
mickschumacher: he literally wrote nothing ????
estebanocon: and yet he outdid all of yall... embarrassing for some
user23: i feel like this fight to be god father is gonna end with a fist fight in the parking lot
yourusername: and i'll be there with my popcorn
sebastianvettel: maybe let's not encourage fighting
yourusername: why not, these squabbles over being in charge if all FOUR of chickie's parents die are the most entertaining thing in the world to me
jensonbutton: lets halt it on the fighting and dying talk okay (i will also be front row to watch these morons fight)
maxverstappen1: if it's a fist fight clear win for me imo
fernandoalo_oficial: how did we get here (i will referee)
danielricciardo: respectfully maxy, i will beat your ass
maxverstappen1: NUH UH
kimiraikkonen: i'm winning no question
sebastianvettel: now that i agree with
yourusername: i thought you were against fighting?
sebastianvettel: i guess it would be kind of funny (especially because any physical violence is an immediate red flag)
user24: okay but can someone actually let us know who got what cause i know these men probably got the dumbest shit that can never actually be used by a child
user25: there's a thread on twitter!
Tumblr media
fernandoalo_oficial
Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 934,045 others
fernandoalo_oficial: old man still got it 👍 thank you to the team for your help, needed to impress y/n with my day job x
view all comments
user27: impending fatherhood got nando looking like he can make it an eight championship house
sebastianvettel: @yourusername he's good but i was better
jensonbutton: @yourusername and i was even better x
fernandoalo_oficial: ummm this is literally my post about MY podium?
sebastianvettel: i would've won but that's just me 😬
fernandoalo_oficial: 2013 called and it wants your attitude back 🤨
jensonbutton: it's been ten years guys... (i would've also won)
sebastianvettel: well my trophy cabinet is the fullest so chickie will know who was the best by that :)
yourusername: the sexual tension is killing me, how did yall not shag back in 2010?
jensonbutton: too busy winning and being sluts elsewhere x
maxverstappen1: yall claim you would've won? yall wouldn't get close to me sorry not sorry
sebastianvettel: oh look who's out of the running for god father
maxverstappen1: NO I TAKE IT BACK
yourusername: don't worry maxy, he's joking the bee keeping suit went down VERY WELL
charles_leclerc: he's such a cheat i didn't even know they existed :(
maxverstappen1: you snooze you loose
yourusername: @charles_leclerc i'm craving pasta, i heard it's good in the ferrari hospitality
charles_leclerc: on it 🫡
fernandoalo_oficial: so is no one going to congratulate me?
yourusername: CONGRATS BUB! turns out you ARE great at your day job (and very sexy drenched in champagne)
sebastianvettel: i agree
jensonbutton: i agree
yourusername: once again how did yall make it through the 2010s
user28: i'm trying not to be weird about this but i know their sex life must be crazy
yourusername
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by jensonbutton, danielricciardo and 1,403,677 others
tagged: fernandoalo_oficial
yourusername: baby's first f1 weekend and daddy nando did not disappoint (neither did the grid, yall are so generous thank you)
view all comments
user29: i am so unwell this is all so cute i might die
fernandoalo_oficial: i would get any shit box on the podium for you guys
yourusername: NO BRAKES! NO TYRES! OUT OF THE POINTS!
jensonbutton: babe that was over five years ago...
yourusername: ummmm i'm doing my research on your careers? i'd never watched f1 i needed to catch up
sebastianvettel: who showed you this?
yourusername: oscar and lando said they'd give me a quick fire history lesson
fernandoalo_oficial: @oscarpiastri @landonorris i've won 32 races and you show y/n that?
landonorris: funny?
oscarpiastri: we also showed her multi 21, sorry not sorry seb
sebastianvettel: not my four championships?
oscarpiastri: justice for my manager
user30: obsessed with how y/n can watch old races and most of the time one of her bfs win 😭
alexalbon: so great to finally meet you! the albon pets hope it's a girl!
yourusername: don't tell them i told you this but me too
jensonbutton: we can literally all see this?
yourusername: you guys would be such girl dads lets be real
user31: potential girl dad seb, jenson and fernando DO NOT THREATEN ME WITH A GOOD TIME
user32: do NOT let seb name them he's already used all of the good bond girl names
sebastianvettel: i'll have you know kinky kylie is a top tier name
yourusername: for a car. do not suggest any names affiliated with any spy films
sebastianvettel
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by astonmartinf1, mickschumacher and 1,459,832 others
tagged: yourusername, jensonbutton & fernandoalo_oficial
sebastianvettel: thought i'd have a quiet life after retirement, i thought wrong
view all comments
user33: the BEAR ???
user34: what if i die so i can be reincarnated as the f1 baby
jensonbutton: always arguing over who is the best driver but yet i am always designated driver ... makes you think
sebastianvettel: you're the one who pulls the "i'm the oldest" card ... makes you think
fernandoalo_oficial: only one of us is still racing ... makes you think
yourusername: someone is waiting to go to bed but some people are arguing in the comment section ... makes you think
user35: this kid is going to have the most entertaining childhood ever...
yourusername: @fernandoalo_oficial retire so you can join the crochet club
fernandoalo_oficial: no can do i need to bring home the bacon (and beat lewis)
lewishamilton: why am i catching strays? can i join the crochet club instead of fernando?
yourusername: it's strictly bring your own yarn and real housewives only
lewishamilton: make it beverly hills and i'm there
fernandoalo_oficial: ummmmm ??? @mercedesamgf1 ur driver is retiring you heard it hear first
yourusername: you guys gonna beef over crochet as well?
fernandoalo_oficial: yes.
lewishamilton: yes.
jensonbutton: okay nando you're the only one we're waiting for, we're debating god fathers
fernandoalo_oficial: one sec my pr team called me, turns out you can't make up a rumour that lewis hamilton is retiring, who knew?
maxverstappen1: VOTE FOR ME PLEASE
charles_leclerc: you've won enough this season, let me have this one
mickschumacher: i'll bring breakfast in the morning for three votes at least
yourusername: do NOT try and bribe the jury.
note: PART THREE! okay so it's finally here and i hope it's what you guys were looking for... the race for god father is heating up and the name arguments are only just starting... i am enjoying the pregnancy content but i'm excited for baby time !!!
taglist: @boiohboii @vellicora @faithm120601 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @luv4kani @minkyungseokie @eugene-emt-roe @magical-spit @ironmaiden1313 @jaydaaasworld @whoreks @rainerax @nonsensical-nonsence @laneyspaulding19 @chelseyyouraverageluigi @lxclerc @gemofthenight @woweewoowa @tagteamedbitch @imagandom @mypage-myfandoms @mehrmonga @asparklysoul @unstableplant @motorsp0rt @multilovebot @lili-flower03 @its-elias-world @jolixtreesunn @nothingfuninthislife @rileynicol3 @kodzuvk @mochimommy2002 @fluffyspaceprincess @roseseraj @black-swan-blog27 @nyrasslut @justdreamersdream @asfaraslifegets @why4anne @ineffableperson @leilanixx @lunyyx @pupbistro @gaypoetsblog @rafaaoli @champomiel @sadsierra2 @rainerax @lokietro
3K notes · View notes
blue2black · 7 months ago
Text
HAZBIN HOTEL BLOOPERS:
PART 1
—————————
Valentino: The UNGRATEFUL WHORE! *throws drink towards Vox*
Vox: *steps to the side but gets the drink on him anyway*
Vox: ...
Vox: Which whore are we—UGH, that smells. *chuckles while wiping his coat*
Valentino: Sorry. 😓
Vox: No, it's okay.
Director: CUT!
—🎬—
Valentino: The UNGRATEFUL WHORE! *throws drink towards Vox and hits him*
Vox: AH-
—🎬—
Valentino: The UNGRATEFUL WHORE! *throws drink towards Vox*
—🎬—
Valentino: THAT FUCKING WHORE! *growling, throws drink towards Vox*
—🎬—
Valentino: The UNGRRRRATEFUL WHORE! *throws drink towards Vox*
—🎬—
Valentino: The fucking 🎶whoooooooorrrrreee🎶 *spins gracefully*
—🎬—
Valentino: ... 😐
Valentino: *raises drink* THE UNGRATEFUL—AAAAAH—son of a- 🤬
—🎬—
Vox: Think of something that pisses you off.
Valentino: I can only break so many glasses before I get this fucking line right, Christian...
—————————
Angel: Eh, you fucked one cannibal pool boy, you fucked 'em all. *brings his drink to his lips*
Husk: I guess you have changed...
Angel: *laughs out his drink back into his cup*
—🎬—
Angel: I want you to like, sing me a lullaby in that voice.
Husk: Mm. 😏 *knows he's the shit*
—————————
Alastor: —for every other disrespectful WRETCH who DARES to question me.
Husk, shaking: UnderST—*seagull screech*—d.
Husk: ... 😐
Husk: I was trying to sound scared... *Alastor laughs*
Husk: That voice crack though. *smiles while getting up*
—————————
Vaggie: Action...!
Niffty: 😃 ->🧍‍♀️
Vaggie: ...
Niffty: ...
Vaggie: ...
Niffty: ... 😐
Niffty: 🥴
Niffty, covering her face: AHHHH, I can't do it!! 😆
Vaggie and Angel: 😆😆
—————————
Alastor: ... *toothy grin in place*
Director: CUT!
Alastor: *turns into a fish* 😮 Ooooo...
Alastor: 😲 Ahhhhhhh...
Alastor, rubbing his cheeks: Fuckin' Christ.
—————————
Giant Overlord Alastor (animatronic): I̶͎͇̙̳̙͍̼̺̺̠̿̂̉ ̵̢̗̤̥̯͚͎́̎̉̆̑́͘͘̕̕ẁ̸͍̎į̶̛͗̈̎̽̍̍͘l̸̝̳͙̓̆͊̆͠l̴̢̧͙̹͖̩̫̻͔̄͛͂̈́̓͝ ̵̳͕̗͙̭̟͙̭͍̙̐͊͐̊d̶̫̗̮̿̀̈́̔̌̉̿̓̚e̴̺̰̊̓͂v̸̞͚͕͚͕̱̝̿̍̎̀̽́̅̀͠o̸̢̧͍̳͈͎̼̪͑ȕ̸̠͇͈̝̦͔͍̯̘̥̓r̷̨̤̦̰͈̞̠͚̀̃̇͋͝ ̸̢̭̺͖̭͖͚̃̉͒̐e̸͉͕̰̝͌̀̇̄͆̀͜͠͝á̴̢̞͓̝̝̗̪̪̓č̵̪̈́̃͋̈́̒̽͑̿͘h̴̡̡̛͇̱͓̭̟̟͚̐͜ ̷̧̲͔̏̄ȧ̶͈͈͎͚͖̺̫̼̓̄̇̍͘ņ̴̘͍̘̗̑d̷̢͊̔ ̷̢̢͔̙͚̙̳͌͋͑̕͘ḛ̸̲́v̷͉̗̆̐̑͂̂͜ę̴̧̜̙̰̈́͑̎̀́̍̇̆̕͘r̵̫̐̚y̴̟̺̙̑͂̽́̊̀͑͋ ̷̺̳̏̈́͒́͐̃O̸̯̲͂̇̋̈́̎͗N̷̡̟͇͔̯̏Ë̵̹̝́́̈́̍̀͐́̊͘ ̴͍͚̏͠O̴̰̣͙̭̥̹͙͇̓̄̈́̉̃̔F̶̲̝͔̖̗͕̭̜͐͗̉̍̃ ̴̢̡̮͖͓̕Y̸̢̡̞̪̦̫͂͊́̽͂͌͆̂̓Ô̸̲̻͕̄̊̋̆̏͐̋͝͝U̸̡͔͇͈̖̺̳͚̥̿ͅ!̵̢̬̬̝̙̈͌̔̇̓ͅ
Alastor, from behind the scenes: 😱
—————————
Angel: —I can handle MYSELF.
Husk: REALLY?! be- *Angel flinches back and almost falls*
Husk: —AH, sorry, that was too loud. *grabs Angel's arm*
Angel: These GOD DAMN heels!
—🎬—
Husk: Really??
Husk: Great, that wasn't loud ENOUGH.
—🎬—
Angel: You got this 👍😃👍
Husk, face in his hands: UuugggghhhhhaaaAAAAHHHHHHH—
—🎬—
Husk: Really?! Because I just saw someone self-destructing!
Husk: ...it seems like...I don't know...
Husk: You might need a bartender to talk to.
...
Director: When you say that last part, add a little softness to it.
Husk: Hahaha 😄 *Angel: 😁*
Director: Remember, you're trying to comfort him.
Director: Let's go again!
—🎬—
Angel: —I can HANDLE MYSELF!
Husk: RE—*seagull screech*
Husk: *face palms* Goddammit! Why does that happen??-
—🎬—
Husk: —how famous, how hot—
Husk: So, you might as well just...cut the act.
Angel, whips his head around: IT'S NOT AN act... *trails off laughing*
—🎬—
Husk: Loser. *lovingly*
Angel: No, you. *also lovingly*
—🎬—
Husk: Are we doing a string of this? *Angel: 😅*
—————————
Lucifer and Sera, taking a selfie: 😇😝
—————————
Lute: Got a good 275 this year, sir.
Adam: HAH, awesome, pound it danger tits. *fist bumps Lute*
Adam: Yeah, yeah...love you girl.
Adam, panicking: Ohhh no, I wasn't supposed to say that. *BTS crew laughs*
Adam: Charlie, your idea is shit—fucking hell—go back, go away... *waves Charlie away, looking down embarrassed*
Charlie: *laughing her ass off*
—————————
Angel, laying in the studio bed naked: I can't believe that the first acting role I ever get requires me to moan into a mic a thousand times.
—————————
*Husk and Angel chatting before the start of a scene*
Vaggie:
Tumblr media
(She’s the #1 HuskerDust shipper on God)
635 notes · View notes
agustdiv1ne · 1 year ago
Note
taehyun as the nerd in your psychology class who gets hard watching you put on your lip gloss- 😳
AJKAKDKSKFJJWJFHS ADA. ADAAAAA. ok i am so sane i am so normal i am so sane and normal and AHHHH-
(MDNI!!!!)
taehyun sits across from you in lecture, glasses perched on high on his nose and always clothed in comfortable hoodies and jeans. his seat gives him a perfect view of you, the person who he's had a perverted little crush on since the very beginning of the semester. you're pretty, okay? smart too, always answering the professor's questions when you can and diligently taking notes every class without fail, the end of your pen placed primly between your parted lips.
those lips are fucking sinful, he thinks. they're plump and just oh so kissable, lip gloss never not applied — lip gloss that he's weirdly obsessed with. he likes watching it glint under the lights of the lecture hall whenever you speak, your voice a siren song in his ears as his cock twitches below the table he sits at. he wants to see that lip gloss smeared across your face while you're under him writhing with unadulterated pleasure. he wants to feel it the sticky liquid against his own lips, his neck, everywhere. what do you taste like? he bets you taste sweet, maybe like bubblegum or cotton candy or something fruity, if the pink color gracing your lips is anything to go by.
you're just about done answering the professor's question (something about freud, he isn't really paying attention at the moment) when your hand brandishes his favorite thing in the world: a tube full of that pink sticky stuff that he adores. with one last smile, your fingers untwist the tube and apply some more gloss to your lips, and taehyun's cock fully hardens below the table, a very obvious tent in his pants. fuck. right now, really?
yet he still can't bring himself to wrench his wanting gaze from your lips, taking in how they smack together a couple times and quirk into a small smile as you look at him — wait, you're looking at him. and down to his lap, and back up to his face.
oh. oh, no.
you're openly ogling his boner with a surprised, almost humored smile, eyes not leaving him as he shrinks into himself a little, his panicky hands shoving his hoodie over his lap. he's been caught, there's no way you don't think he's weird now. shit. squriming in his seat, he shoves his hood over his head, hunches over the table, and starts taking rapid notes, not looking back at you for the rest of the class.
although he tries his best to avoid you after class, you manage to catch him before he can leave his seat. with an air of confidence, you introduce yourself, your stray gaze passing over his lap. he gulps, offering his name, which causes you to smile. there goes that lip gloss again, shining, taunting him. he wants to cum on them, mix his white cum into that sheer pink — shit, stop thinking about that. think about freud. yeah, frued and his vomit-inducing contributions to psychology. yeah, perfect.
"hello?" you call, waving a hand in front of face. his eyes blink back into focus, finding yours again. "i asked if you wanna study together sometime?" you're biting your lip, looking hopeful. playful now, almost.
"yeah, that sounds great," he replies just as confidently, though every single drop is fake. inside, he's shaking like a leaf at the thought of the two of you alone together, how close you would be. so when you smile and give him your number, hitting him with a giddy, "bye, taehyun! see you thursday!" as you scurry off, he's left sitting there almost dumbfounded. his cock is still hard beneath his hoodie, but it seems as if everyone has vacated the lecture hall now, no sign of life anywhere. maybe, maybe...
he nearly moans aloud at the feeling of relief, his jeans quickly unzipped so he can grope himself harder. his eyes remain on the door as he continues. shit, he shouldn't be doing this. what if he gets caught? but it feels so fucking good, thinking about you and your pretty fucking lip gloss, imagining those lips around him as he fucks your throat. groaning, he whispers a curse out into the quiet air, a purr of your name. fuck, baby, feels so good.
too good. he really can't stop now, hand pumping his cock so fast that he fears his arm may cramp, messy precum everywhere — but he can risk being a bad student for once in his life, he thinks.
2K notes · View notes