#ADHD tips

[ficklerecluse]

Reminder to us all to Take It With You

Adhd means I forget this for myself and need to actively remind myself

ADHD cheat code: when you're leaving a room/area, check if there is anything you need to bring to the room/area you're going to

Like, when you need to leave you're room to get some food in the kitchen, check if you have any dishes that need to be cleaned or if your water glass needs a refill. Or if you are going to the bathroom after doing something in the living room, check if you have clothes that need to be put in your hamper

I call it the Take It With You rule for myself

[etherealspacejelly]

this is your gentle reminder to stop fighting against your adhd and instead structure your life around it

buy a pack of chapsticks and put one in the pocket of all of your coats and jackets because you always forget to bring one and chapped lips is sensory hell

leave important things where you can see them. if they go in a box or a drawer you will forget they exist

put any appointments or deadlines in your phone calendar As Soon As you get them. set a reminder for a week before, a day before, an hour before, as many as you need as often as you need them.

when that little voice in your head says "i dont need to write that down, ill remember it" that is the devil talking!!! write it down anyway!!

plan for down time. have a few hours at the end of every day to just do fun stuff like engage in your hyperfixations. even if you didnt get all of your work done that day, have the rest anyway. you probably spent the whole day beating yourself up for not doing what you Should be doing, so you still need the break.

if you never eat vegetables because its too much effort to chop and cook them, get the frozen or canned shit. it doesnt go off for ages and you just have to microwave it. theres no point buying fresh vegetables if they just keep going off and being left to rot in the bottom of your fridge

if you struggle to decide what to have for dinner every day, take the decision out of it. choose a set of meals and eat those on rotation until you get sick of them, then choose some new ones and do it again.

its not stupid if it works! our brains literally have a chemical deficiency. you are allowed to accommodate yourself. go forth and stop making your life more difficult than it has to be because "this shouldn't be this hard". it is hard, so make it easier.

[saudadeko]

ADHD tips from a girlie who was diagnosed in her late twenties and has had little to no support since and is being so brave about it:

1) Make it easy, make it accessible, and make it appealing. If anything this is the most important thing, all tips going forward are based around this concept.

2) That thing you think would help you but you haven’t bought/done it yet because you’re technically surviving without it? Buy it, you need it. It doesn’t matter if people around you might think it’s wasteful or that you’re lazy, you’re not, just do it, trust me.

3) Expanding on tip #2, if you’re like me and eggs are your main source of protein because they’re quick and easy and feeding yourself is a near insurmountable task- buy yourself an electric egg cooker, make a bunch of hard boiled eggs and keep them in your fridge for quick and easy protein to add to any meal (handful of crackers, a hard boiled egg and a banana? 5 star meal right there. Or mash them up with some mayo for egg salad sandwiches). Other easy proteins include: potstickers (put them in instant ramen), edamame (they have microwaveable snack packs), chickpeas (put in salads!), beans (can of beans microwaved with shredded cheese and some tortilla chips), peanut butter (with crackers, apple and cheese, adult lunchable style), and tofu (cut into cubes, throw them into a ziplock with some seasoning and potato starch, shake that shit up and bake it until crispy).

4) Spend a little extra (if you are able) on daily use items that excite you, it will make you more likely to remember/want to do said daily task. For example: the only reason I remember to use sunscreen is because I bought some fancy japanese sunscreen that smells like roses so I get excited to use it, same for laundry detergent and body wash! there’s a gajillion different body wash scents out there, switch it up!

5) If there’s a task you continuously struggle with take a moment to think about which part of the task is making it difficult, it could be something even as small as “I don’t put my dirty clothes in the hamper because my hamper has a lid on it and lifting the lid is one step too many-”, sounds a little stupid huh? But trust your gut, it’s not stupid if it works. See tip #2 and BUY A HAMPER WITHOUT A LID.

6) If you are having trouble starting a task, break the task down further, sometimes the way I start a task is just by going “Ok step 1) stand up-“ and so forth. Don’t worry about the task as a whole just take it one step at a time.

7) If you’re halfway through a task and have to stop, leave it out. All this, “Put things away when you’re done with them.” is bullshit. you will be much more likely to finish the task if restarting it is easier because you left it out plus it’s a visual reminder. You can also create faux deadlines like “I gotta finish this project before my friend comes over on tuesday because after I finish it I can clean off the dinner table.” etc.

8) It’s okay to outsource tasks and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, humans are designed to ask for, and to require help (what do babies do when they’re first born?? cry for help!!) ask for help and receive help without shame, if it makes your life better, you are WINNING.

9) If you have one big overwhelming task that you think you need to get done before anything else, but you feel motivated to do other tasks, do those other tasks first, it’s okay. Otherwise in all likelihood (at least in my case) you’ll put everything off until the last minute and then have to do said overwhelming task and those other tasks won’t get done at all. Doing those smaller tasks also lowers the mental load and you can use them as a motivation launch pad to tackle bigger things.

10) If you notice you tend to not put something away/forget to do something, perhaps consider moving and storing the item closer to where it ultimately ends up or where you are more likely to see it. For example, my makeup, pills, and mail are all stored on my desk because that’s where I tend to do my makeup, take my pills and deal with my mail. I used to store my pills in my bathroom medicine cabinet but all too often I would forget because they weren’t in my line of sight. Now that they’re on my desk, I have multiple chances per day to pass by them, go “oh I gotta take those.” and take them.

11) Open storage, open storage, OPEN STORAGE.

12) Motivation can look like all kinds of things. sometimes the only reason I get out of bed is because I remember I have a fun snack and I get to go eat it if I get up. It’s okay to lean into those simple “animal-brain” type motivators, you’ll eat because then you can use that fun new kitchen gadget you got a daiso? Neat. you’ll shower because then you can paint your nails that fun new color you got? Fantastic. You’ll go to the dmv and do that annoying thing because you’ll take yourself out for boba after? Superb. Lean-IN to those small motivators, they aren’t stupid or childish, they are VITAL.

13) Don’t buy into the cult of “if it’s worth doing, do it properly” it’s guaranteed to set you up for failure. If it’s worth doing, do it in whatever capacity you are able to. I put sunscreen on once a day because that’s fucking better than not doing it at all and I sure as all hell will fail at reapplying it multiple times a day. If it’s worth doing, do it half-assed babieeee.

Go forth and prosper!!! xoxo ✌️🩵

[tunaricebowl]

i don’t know which autistic/adhd/any kind of neurodivergent person needs to hear this but: make a “just in case” bag

this is a pic of mine. it contains:

loop earplugs on the zipper

prescription glasses with a clip on sunglasses attachment

my public transport discount card

a pen

a glasses cloth + wet glasses wipes (which can also be used to clean my hands if needed!

wireless earbuds in case my headphones give out

tips for my apple pencil + silicon covers if i need a different texture/the sound is too loud

a sanitary pad (not for me, as i had a hysterectomy, but i like carrying one around for my menstruating friends)

a pouch with hair ties for when my hair bothers me

autism lanyard (not pictured, as i put it in after i took it)

will i use these every day? not necessarily. but it’s good to have these all in one place in a little pouch so it’s easy to throw into my bag as i use different ones for different occasions. that way i don’t have to think about all these things individually.

it might seem like common sense for some people, but i didn’t think of this until recently. so i wanted to share this in case it could be handy for other people. some more ideas for what to put in your bag under the break. you can make this as big or as small as you like so some ideas may seem a bit big

powerbank + cables (preferably a powerbank that has a LOT of charge)

snacks (do keep an eye on the expiration date)

painkillers/emergency meds (same thing about the expiration date)

sewing kit

deodorant/perfume

mini fan

hand warmers

scissors/nail clippers (for when tags/threads/your nails are bothering you)

tweezers

lucky charm (i have my lucky cat keychain. it just calms me to have)

plushie/stress ball/fidget toy

mints/a mini toothbrush and toothpaste

extra pair of underwear (for if you suddenly need to stay somewhere overnight or if an accident happens)

comb

band-aids + disinfectant

hand cream/soothing cream

soap/soap leaves

similarly, some mini shampoo or mini body wash (again for if you suddenly need to stay the night. there’s probably already some wherever you’re staying but again. this is a just in case bag)

q-tips

chapstick

makeup remover wipes

razors

hand sanitizer/general sanitizer

wet wipes/tissues

foldable bag

ruler/tape measure

this is a lot but keep in mind, these are just ideas. you don’t have to use everything, just pick out which things you think would be handy for you and make your bag accordingly. do feel free to add onto the list if you have any other ideas.

[dailydivergent]

This is your much-needed reminder to take transitions seriously. As a neurodivergent person, you need much more time to switch between tasks and activities. It's not just important that you take your time, it's imperative for you to be able to keep going. Just like an athlete gets benched when they get injured, neurodivergent people get extra time to switch tasks, start something new, go out, or wrap up whatever you're doing. Take transitions seriously, or they'll seriously affect your health.

[studycation]

my tips for students that struggle with consistency

[5-htagonist]

ADHD TIPS: FOR THE NONMEDICATED AND THE MEDICATED

obviously, ADHD is not the same for everyone who has it. if you dont have ADHD, or aren't sure, but experience issues with executive function, memory, impulsivity, and emotional regulation, these tips can still be helpful!!!

practice radical self forgiveness

keep a notebook/journal

give your items a home

keep baskets, boxes, and bins, especially clear/mesh or anything that lets you see whats in it.

buy fruits/veggies/anything that spoils super quick the day youre going to use it

keep a list of easy meals

keep a trash receptacle in Every room

when you notice something dirty piling up, clean for just 5 minutes

do NOT worry about completing necessary chores. just do a little

if you need it frequently, keep it in sight, but off the floor if you can.

check under your bed, couch, or other corners where stuff can pile up when you get that random energy spike.

take a multivitamin, and cut down on soda (or other highly sugary food/beverages) if youre able. seriously!

specifically for the medicated!

take your meds, go to bed, and wake up at around the same time every day.

being vitamin deficient can make your medicine less effective. magnesium, B vitamins, omega 3s, and vitamin D might help. if you dont eat a lot of fruits, veggies, and fish, you are likely deficient in these at least.

stay. hydrated. For the love of god

try things you had trouble doing before medication

dont expect medicine to fix you

dont blame medicine for all of your improvement

no 2 people are the same, and what works for me might not work for you. i am likely on the spectrum, and i wasnt medicated at all for my ADHD until i was 17, and i wasnt on the right medicine until i was 21. i would recommend keeping that in mind while considering my tips!!

i will elaborate on these tips under the cut!

practice radical self forgiveness

i think this is the most important of all of these tips, which is why i put it first. i know its easy to look down on ourselves for our disability. but you must acknowledge this: you are disabled. you have a disability. you cannot hold yourself to the "normal" standard. more than likely, you grew up in an environment that didnt teach you how to navigate the world as you are, either. thats okay! we must teach ourselves.

try to view yourself as both the teacher/parent, and the child. when you forget something important, or make a careless mistake, or give into impulses, or say youll do it later and dont, or go too long without a bath, or let the trash pile up, you have to be kind to yourself. the child within you needs it. these things simply dont come naturally to us.

you must apologize to yourself as the child: im sorry i didnt pick up the trash. i know it makes the place dirty, and overwhelming. i will do my best to improve. i love you. you must forgive yourself as the parent: its okay, pumpkin. i forgive you. i know you didnt mean to make me overwhelmed, or to invite dirt into the home. i will help you improve. i love you. you also must do the reverse, apologize as the parent: im sorry, child. i did not teach you how to know you should pick up the trash. i did not teach you to recognize dirt. i will do better, and i will help you as best i can. i love you. forgive as the child: i forgive you. i know you are doing your best to lead me, and teach me what you know. you werent taught to pick up and see dirt either, were you? as long as you support and love me, we can figure it out together. i love you.

i know, to think this way can feel infantilizing sometimes. and its much harder to teach ourselves these habits. if its available, its okay to ask for help. just dont be too hard on yourself when your disability impairs your ability to be "normal." our habits die harder than most. even if you forget to maintain a habit, just do it when you remember.

2. keep a notebook/journal

i know, i know... every ADHDer HATES this tip. but it seriously works. dont hold yourself to a rigid standard when using it. i prefer dot grid journals, so i can write notes, or sketch, or make lists, or otherwise neatly divide pages how i wish, rather than it being blank/horizontally lined.

i dont keep a to do list all the time, i dont journal every day, i dont even look at the thing every day. there is no right way to use your journal. i use mine for many things at once: if i forget a notebook for class, or my laptop dies, i put my class notes in there. i put random doodles, layouts, oc pages, Big Feelings, and weekly/daily plans/to do lists. i dont obsessively keep up with it, or update it every day.

i DO use it when i feel overwhelmed. if i feel like 50 different things need to be done in 3 different domains and i dont know where to start, i write them down as i think of them. here is my typical order of operations (it took me a while to figure this out. i struggle deeply with prioritization.)

first, i write everything down i can think of that that moment. second, i label them necessary, important, and least important. third, i label how long they take (most time, some time, least time) finally, i start with the most important one that is the least overwhelming

now, i dont have an easy time labeling importance and time taken, of course. that can be the hardest part. but i dont worry so much about accuracy of my labels. i havent got it all down because i will almost always prioritize schoolwork over housework and hygiene, but we cant be perfect. the MOST important thing is always your health and safety.

dont worry about finishing a todo list, either. the most important thing is getting stuff you can forget on paper where you can look back at it when youre overwhelmed. you should keep your journal somewhere you access frequently or can see it.

also, the journal helps with big feelings. if youre feeling that white hot anger, the itching impulsivity, or rejection sensitivity, or anything that makes you think "i cant do this," start jotting words or pictures down. it can be anything. this will help when you feel that feeling the next time. we often get stuck in loops because we dont remember what caused a feeling or conflict, so we make the same mistakes. when you write it down, you can take your own word for it when you make a mistake. this makes it easier to recognize when youre falling into a pattern, and makes it easier to change your response.

3. give your items a home

if you arent constantly using something, or go more than a day without using it, send it home. an objects home is just somewhere it comes back to when its not needed, so that it isnt taking up space where it isnt needed. things like snacks, laundry (clean and dirty), art/craft/hobby materials, coats, electronics, plushies, anything. personify your stuff just a little bit- if you cant use it anymore, it cant find a home with you-- you have to send it on trash vacation. your coat wants to go home! pick it up and take it there when you can. its okay if that home isnt permanent, or if you lack materials/money to create a proper home. our coatrack is a chair right now, which is a much comfier home than the floor.

4. keep baskets, boxes, and bins, especially ones that are see through/visible

this helps you give your items a home. if you buy storage, get something stackable too, but even a cardboard box works. keep like objects together! and keep them near what theyre used for.

5. buy fruits/veggies/anything that spoils quickly the day youre going to use it

its sooo tempting to try to eat healthy and save money by stocking your fridge full of healthy produce and raw meat, but unfortunately i know how much money we waste forgetting/not having the energy to use them. if you need a fresh fruit, veggie, or meat, for something you are definitely planning on cooking, buy it the day of. if you have something in your fridge you dont think youre going to use before it rots or molds, stick it in the freezer!!!

also, frozen and canned fruits, veggies, and meats are just as good as fresh. they stay good for so long you dont have to worry about it going bad.

6. keep a list of easy meals

things that you can get down your gullet easily, and prepare easily. 1 pan meals, sandwiches, hotdogs, hot pockets, instant oatmeal, canned meals. i typically keep instant oatmeal and those tuna creations packets, as well as club/ritz crackers. also, skillet meals like velveeta skillets and hamburger helper are awesome, just keep some frozen ground beef (or meat of your choice) and youre good to go!

also, eggs last for MUCHHHH longer than the sell by date. i have had eggs 3 months past the date (note im american so they are under refrigeration) that were still good, but obviously that long past the date you should do a sniff test after breaking an egg. eggs are awesome in terms of ease of prep. heat your pan up to temp before cooking and they wont stick so bad. use cheese or milk to make a desirable texture for scrambled eggs or omlettes. dont forget salt and pepper (necessary...) you can also stir an egg and peanut butter into instant ramen for some actual nutrition. i also keep onion powder, paprika, and cayenne for yummy eggs.

in the egg vein, french toast is extremely easy and filling, and will sate a sweet tooth with some syrup!

7. keep a trash receptacle in every room

it doesnt have to be big, but having a designated trash spot in your bedroom is super helpful

8. when you notice something dirty piling up, clean for just 5 minutes

you dont have to clean to completion, thats overwhelming!!! but when you see something gross or messy and it bothers you, just take a couple minutes and pick up a little. play a song and tidy until the end of it! cleaning isnt all or nothing!

9. do not worry about completing chores, just do a little

in the same vein as the last one, the most important thing is getting the ball rolling. cleaning can be really hard because of the overwhelm of how bad it is. you can make it less bad a little at a time!

something ill do is sort out and scrape off the dishes before even thinking about doing them. that way, they take up less space and it doesnt look quite as bad. then next time i come to them, i do a bit more. or ill pick up the dirty laundry off the floor, then ill put it next to the washing machine, then ill wash/dry. i dont worry about folding and putting away unless im up for it-- its more important that theyre clean at all.

10. if you need it frequently, keep it in sight, but off the floor if you can.

remember, the floor is the stuff killer! if it must be on the floor, designate a spot.

11. check under the bed, couch, chairs, and piles if you have a random energy spike

i have found so much stuff i didnt even realize i lost. this also prevents pests and the accumulation of dirt.

12. take a multivitamin and cut down on soda (or other highly sugary foods) if youre able. seriously!

in high school i tried eating low-carb for a while. i didnt maintain this diet, but what i did maintain was not drinking soda regularly. when i say my head cleared and i felt less groggy, i mean it. if youre in the position, pay attention to the amount of sugars in what you eat and drink.

i know the "eat well" advice is given out too much, but nutrition seriously matters. if you care to work on your nutrition, do not worry about fat, carbs, or anything like that. just cut down on how often you eat highly sugary foods. you will feel so much better just from that. i have a sody pop as a treat every now and then and i have a whole other appreciation for it :-)

for the medicated:

take your meds, wake up, and go to bed around the same time

your body works on a schedule whether you want it to or not. pay attention to this schedule and try to work with it. when do you usually get tired? when do you prefer to wake up? when do you usually use the bathroom? this goes for nonmedicated people, too. your body will thank you!

2. vitamin deficiency can make medicine less effective. magnesium, B vitamins, vitamin D, and omega 3s can help.

these vitamins are all harmless, except for magnesium, which can slow your heart rate and cause shallow breathing IN HIGH DOSES. luckily, stimulants tend to deplete vitamins/electrolytes like magnesium, which can cause twitches and spasms. dont get large doses of these, 100% daily value is just fine.

3. for the love of god stay hydrated

imagine you are a machine and water is lubricant. stimulants suck up this lubricant to make you run more effectively. however, without extra, the machine will still run like shit. try to drink a whole glass with your medicine, and keep a cup to fill thru the day.

4. try things you had trouble with before medication

its super easy to get discouraged from something when you feel like a failure! try it again now! it may be easier. be sure to give yourself praise for what you do! your effort, your success, anything! this will teach your brain to see stuff through and help you feel and be more competent!

5. dont expect medicine to fix you

adderall, vyvanse, ritalin, none of these are a pill to fix you. they give you the capacity to work on yourself. dopamine is the "go get it" chemical. typically, ours is low and irregular, so we dont feel the drive to "go get it" when we need to, and we dont feel enough of a drive to see something through until we "get it." you still have to put in a lot of effort to fix habits and do work, medicine makes it so its easier. for me, it also reduces Noise in my head, so i can focus better. i still have to put effort into everything, its just less painful.

6. dont blame medicine for all of your improvement

again, medicine gives you capacity. YOU still do it all! its all you!!!!!! :D

thank u for reading i hope these are helpful! i feel like adhd tips are veryyy all or nothing and never explain WHY they may help, so i hope my explanations are helpful!

[nihilistem]

adhd study affirmations + tips to stray from discouragement by a stem student with adhd.

you’re not always going to be consistent. you’re not always going to be motivated. you’re not always going to be efficient. and that is okay.

edit : thank you so much to whoever blazed this post. It means the world to me.

and the fact that you even got this far is an accomplishment in and of itself. In this line of work, people aren’t always the kindest to neurodivergent people especially since our symptoms can often hinder our performance academically.

if you’re good to go after reading the above, I’ve also made a post regarding adhd study tips that I haven’t seen anywhere else. (Part 2 is here!) But, if you’re burned out like me, feel free to keep reading.

honestly, these might serve a bit more as reminders because they’re kinda simple but even I needed this, so, here we go.

do not seek advice from anyone neurotypical unless it genuinely helps you. I cannot tell you the amount of time and tears I could have saved if I just considered the fact that just because popular self-improvement tips or study techniques didn’t work for me, it doesn’t mean I’m stupid or useless. It simply means our brains isn’t motivated by the same things neurotypical ones are, and therefore a lot of popular self-improvement videos or study tips aren’t going to work for you because 90% of the time, they’re not designed to work for neurodivergent people. So if you’d like to seek help in this area, look for tips and videos that ARE for neurodivergent people.

you might experience burnout a lot more than others. again, that is fine. if this doesn’t apply to you, great! Feel free to skip to the next tip/affirmation. If this does apply to you, read this carefully; if you’ve had any sort of streak in studying right now, chances are you know at least a portion of your studies were led purely on interest, curiosity or even novelty, as these are what keep us engaged in our studies. Knowing this, it is natural for you to experience burnout more frequently than others due to the possible hyperfixations that have been forming around your work. If you get burned out, please remember to take a break for a day and make sure it is efficient. Like your studies, your breaks are the key to having efficient study sessions in the future. So please treat yourself, especially if you’ve been working extra hard!

do not admire studious fictional characters unless it genuinely helps you or they too are neurodivergent. I know this technically could have been thrown in with tip number 1 but I felt like this tip alone is so important, because nowadays I see a lot of study tips with the title, ‘how to study like (insert studious fictional character here)’ and when I look at the post it kinda repeats the same few study tips I see all the time like ‘stay organized’ or ‘time block your day’ and I feel like admiring fictional characters who do things that don’t work for you can be damaging for your mental health, because we’re already told by neurotypical people all around us that we’re slow or lazy just because we don’t do things the way they do, and I think idolizing neurotypical people that make us feel bad at the end of the day just further promotes that kind of toxic thinking.

expect that a routine/schedule/technique that has been working for a while now may not continue to work in the future. things will always have to be new for us to be interested or engaged, that being said, if you expect this in the future you won’t be frustrated with yourself because you already had this in mind. It doesn’t mean you’re not smart. It doesn’t mean you’re lazy. It doesn’t mean you’re useless. It just means that you’ve done what you could, and now it’s time to move on to another routine/schedule/technique.

keep doing the things you love alongside work. I find that because our symptoms may cause us to fall behind on our studies, we tend to neglect our other needs as human beings just to make up for the fact that we simply do not learn or pick things up the same way neurotypical people do. Your hobbies and interests need to be part of your day, just as your studies do, even if you may take longer to learn things or remember important concepts in your studies. Neglecting your hobbies or interests can lead to even more frequent burn outs and even a relapse in depression and anxiety, so please take care of yourself and recognize that you need and deserve these things just as much as anyone else.

regularly discover what works for you on your own. here’s the thing; neurodivergent or not, no two brains work the same. Of course it is good to try out advice or tips you find online because they’re backed up by experience, but they’re backed up by that person’s experience with working with their own brain. So naturally, you need to find what works with your brain. Be open to trying everything, even the tips that are discouraged like listening to lyrical music while studying. That was the only way I learnt that this tip actually does help me at times, even when many people have said that it negatively affects your focus.

that’s all I have right now guys, I think I’m experiencing burn out or probably falling back into depression again so more than anything this also served as a reminder for me, but I really hope it also helped you guys nonetheless.

As always, tell me if you guys would like more posts like these and I’ll be happy to make more <33 please take care of yourself guys, and remember that your studies is just one aspect of your life. There are other aspects that need your care and attention too.

[mikajunie]

rediscovering shame and giving yourself compassion (how to deal with shame as someone with ADHD)

this is directed towards my fellow ADHDers who have trouble with reoccuring shame while leads to hindered productivity.

signs that your productivity is hindered by shame (compiled by my own experiences):

you feel negative physical symptoms when you think about your responsibilities

you find ways to avoid the responsibilities

every time you make progress, you feel like you don't ever wanna touch it again

when you present your progress, you feel ashamed of yourself because it's not finished (on time & according to ur standards).

you feel like you are a constant failure. you never win, despite achieving good things here and there.

you are a walking ball of anxiety

you have a fear of being perceived

there's probably more, but eh those are just from my own experiences

below i will write down what y'all should remember, what you can do to help yourself, etc. this is compiled from dr k, my own journaling time, and my firsthand experience from having shame 24/7

some things u gotta remember

shame is what exists in the gap between your ideal self and where you are currently.

your ideal self doesn't have to be unrealistic, it can be yourself when you were at your peak or someone who is very similar to you.

shame brings negative thoughts, because it makes you see progress as a negative thing.

instead of being happy that u made progress, u grumble to urself and ask "why didnt i just do it sooner? im so stupid". it's a reminder of your failures, so u avoid progress altogether.

shame can become a part of you, to the point where you feel uneasy or vulnerable if you dont feel ashamed at yourself

shame doesn't do anything to ADHDers in the long run except self-loathing and hindered productivity.

what should u do?

basically self-therapy, but instead of stopping at why, i try to solve my shame one-by-one.

examine past moments where you felt a LOT of shame. this can go back to elementary. the stronger the emotions, the better. now, write them down. you're probably cringing, but that is good. feel all the cringiness running through ur veins.

why did you feel shame? why did it happen? what did you feel?

reframe your thoughts. instead of immediately running away from it, accept it and justify it. give it compassion. give it a hug. was it your 7 year old self? hug yourself. it's okay to fuck up and do silly things sometimes, and it's okay to have ADHD. it's not our fault.

remember that ADHD is a lifelong nerudivergency, you can't just push it away. coping mechanisms and tools help, but give yourself some grace when you screw up. it's our first time living anyway.

calm your body down. make sure your physical body is doing okay.

now... think of one thing you want to do but can't because of shame and do these steps carefully. think of the reasons why you might be ashamed, and reframe your thoughts.

WARNING!! TAKE IT ONE PRESENT ACTION AT A TIME. don't do this for every action you want to take, let your body slowly learn that it's okay to make progress despite the shame you feel, and you are allowed to feel compassion for yourself.

train your body to accept compassion slowly. life is tough with ADHD but it's even tougher knowing that shame will get in your way. give yourself a break, it's fine to fuck up, we all go through different things anyway. even if it's not fine, you will learn and make those mistakes a lil bit lesser in the future.

ok hope this helps.

[jabbage]

My Latest "Getting housework done" ADHD hack

This isn't anything revolutionary, it's basically just a modified pomodoro technique, but I've never tried it for housework before. I really struggle to motivate myself to do housework tasks - they just feel so unending and tedious and abstracted from immediate gains.

I find I'll often put off jobs until my house is a complete mess, then "waste" my weekend stressing out feeling I need to "catch up" on cleaning, struggling to get started because it's so daunting (executive dysfunction) and then being overwhelmed by pushing myself to clean inefficiently for hours and hours at a time.

My new method:

Begin with a leisure activity I enjoy - play a computer game! Do a craft project! This takes the stress of starting out of the equation.

Set a timer for half an hour. Decide on a single, concrete task which I will go and complete when the time is up. It might be putting on some washing or emptying the dishwasher.

When the timer goes off, do the task. Suddenly it seems less daunting, because it's only one thing, and I'm going to get to go back to the fun activity immediate afterwards. Often I find once I'm up and about, I feel like doing a few more chores - but I don't have to.

Go back to the leisure activity, set the timer again.

And crucially, this isn't a "only do at the weekend when the house is a complete mess" thing, it's a "do every day in little bursts" thing.

And I am FORBIDDEN from feeling guilty about returning to the enjoyable task. That's not allowed!

[catboynutsack]

Okay I'm gonna share an ADHD hack I know for the ADHDers that lose stuff often, like me. (Or for anyone that loses anything, frankly. I don't gatekeep self help lol)

Get a spool of ribbon or a strip of fabric or string in a colour you like--the shinier and easier to spot the better--and tie it to things you lose often. A good several inches of length for sure. You can even colour code certain objects so you're looking for a piece of ribbon. It's fabulous when stuff accidentally gets covered up but that ribbon is still hanging out or if it gets accidentally lost in the couch cushions or under a table cuz it got knocked off. For example I have a pair of thread scissors I lose often. So I tied some green thread to them and boom. Never lost again. And if they are they're quickly found. You can do it to pretty much any object.

Anyways. Hope this helps someone!

[tarabyte3]

I see writing tips on here all the time that are designed to help you work through writer's block or a lack of motivation: Write it badly. Set a timer. Build an outline. Have a word goal. And they're all great tips!

Except...they don't work for me. And I could never figure out why, which was always a little frustrating. Like, what am I supposed to do then?!

Until one day, I opened a WIP document and thought, "You know what? I'm going to write 2 sentences. I can write 2 sentences. Plus, if I do, that's 2 more than I wrote yesterday." And I did! I even wrote more than 2 because once I achieved that goal it felt easier. When I eventually hit a wall, I walked away for a bit, and, after some time had passed, I started it all over again.

Then it hit me: All of those other tips focus on volume writing and just getting it done, which was still putting a lot of pressure on myself and felt overwhelming.

...Which is the same problem I have when cleaning or doing any other big, nebulous task and don't know where to start. Because I have ADHD. I'm neurodivergent. You know how I learned to cope with cleaning? By breaking everything into smaller, manageable tasks to help me focus and keep me grounded. I'm not cleaning the kitchen. I'm emptying the dishwasher, gathering dirty dishes, refilling the dishwasher, wiping down the counter, putting the mail away, sweeping, taking out the recycling, etc.

Suddenly I had a new way to approach writing—a small, easily attainable goal I could latch onto—and it's been SUCH a relief. I'm actually making progress!

So if you're stuck, don't beat yourself up or feel bad you aren't writing 2000 words a day after reading a bunch of tips. Just write 2 sentences. You can do 2 sentences.

[chaoticfroggo]

ADHD study tip

One of the hardest things about studying, or just being productive in general, with ADHD is getting started. It's so hard to just sit down and get something done. I was talking to my brother, who also has ADHD, and we realised we both do the same thing before studying. I always thought it was a bad thing, but after talking to my brother I realised it motivates me to continue being productive.

What we do is something we like to call "productive procrastination". It sounds bad, and yes, to an extent, it can be. Basically you do something not related to your task at hand that is still productive. It gives you that activation energy you need to just start what you need to do.

For example, yesterday I put on an audiobook and for half an hour I did a deep clean of my desk and bookshelves before starting my day of studying. Yes, this was procrastination, but it helped give me motivation. Doing something small makes what you need to do less daunting, because you get that bit of dopamine that keeps you going.

I also find that cleaning up my room really helps. I'm normally a really messy person, but when I study I need a clean space. I used to think it wasn't true, but I now really agree with the saying "messy room, messy mind".

[libraryspectre]

I have a tip for people who struggle to do things. I struggle to do things because of depression, but this might also help if you have executive dysfunction? Idk!

I don't usually listen to an audiobook or podcast at home because I can't sit still and listen. Sometimes I will while crafting, but this seems to work as long as I'm not crafting to begin with.

I will put on a podcast or audiobook to keep me company during a specific task, like cleaning out the fridge. What I find is that once I'm done with the intial task, if I am sufficiently engrossed in what I'm listening to, I will naturally come up with other things to do so I can keep listening. If I sit down and be still, the story stops, so I need to keep going. So I might as well clean the bathroom.

What's amazing about this is that it's the only thing I've found that keeps cleaning from feeling like an unpleasant slog. Something about flipping the switch from "I'm listening so I can clean" to "I'm cleaning so I can listen" makes it so much more bearable.

This tends to fall apart as soon as I need a break to sit or eat, or if what I'm listening to isn't interesting enough, but usually I get like three times as much work done as I planned initially.

I'm posting this because I hope it might help someone else, and also because for some reason I've never purposefully exploited this loophole, it's just kind of happened a few times. But I'm thinking I should try to make it happen on purpose.

[thatadhdmood]

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this chair is genius for people with adhd