#AAAAAND

[mugenmcfugen]

Do ghosts feel cold?

[eggs-can-draw]

[nearer-than-the-eye]

LITTLE SAINT

listen Ahi giustizia di Dio! tante chi stipa nove travaglie e pene quant’ io viddi? e perché nostra colpa sì ne scipa?

"Ah, Justice of God, who heaps up such strange punishment and pain as I saw there? and why do our sins so waste us?" For Santino D'Antonio: John Wick's bitter ex, my most beloved villain, and whose name means sacred or little saint.

___

John Wick 2 may have come out nearly a decade ago, but being a Santino girl is a chronic condition. Cover and track list images are details from Caravaggio's Bacchus, and the epigraph is from Canto VIII of Inferno, translated by Robert and Jean Hollander.

Some extended thoughts about my process and choice of epigraph and cover under the read more!

This playlist mostly started because I was listening to "Young Caesar 2000," said to myself, wow, this would be a great Santino song, and put it alone on a new playlist. From there, for about a year, I'd throw on anything that particularly reminded me of Santino, songs that felt, not like they described him, but that they might narrate part of his inner monologue and feeling. Some John/Santino vibes starting slipping in there (almost inevitably), but I knew I wanted to keep things really closely tied to how Santino understands himself. I narrowed things down, did some ordering for the overall arc and (hopefully) smooth transitions, and here we are!

Essential to my understanding of Santino (and thus this playlist's formation) is NeverwinterThistle's Unholy Union and asuralucier's The Man You Want to Be, both of which you should absolutely run, not walk, to read.

I'll let the tracklist mostly speak for itself, but I hopefully captured Santino's arrogance and the fundamental emptiness and deep insecurity that arrogance covers. I really do think John is something real and true for Santino, in a world full of posturing, but he eventually cannot resist instrumentalizing John, just like everyone else. JW 2 is one of the JW movies most pessimistic about masculinity (if not THE most pessimistic), and the arc of this playlist would certainly be very different without Mitksi's "I'm Your Man." Which is Mitski's most pessimistic song about masculinity! So it all works out.

The title -- The fact that Santino's name means "little saint" has fascinated me since my first cursory google search that delivered this factoid, and I've always kept it in my back pocket when thinking about Santino as a character. He's always the little brother. His petulance and pettiness is so essential to his character, and it's, of course, what makes him such a great foil to John (who imagines himself as a rational actor, but has his matching streak of the petulance). Santino inherits all this splendor, and all he can do is try and claw out more and more. A petty saint, and certainly never a god.

Why Bacchus? -- Well, I was trying to get a good film still for the cover and eventually gave up, so then I went to go find something appropriately aesthetic for a playlist cover. I was going to do a Dutch Golden Age still life bc that's what I'm writing about rn and lushness (and rot) is so essential to Santino, but then I was like. this guy is Italian. SUPER Italian. Who's an Italian with dramatic shadows and lush still lifes? And thus Caravaggio. Bacchus because revelry, excess, beauty, ect....also the invitation of the painting--he's holding out the goblet to you, asking you to join him. But mostly because it's beautiful.

Why Dante? -- I KNEW this bitch had to have an epigraph from Inferno once I realized this was going to be a real playlist. I mean, speaking of pessimism! The Divine Comedy feels so crazy to read as a modern reader bc it's like. yeah all this suffering is God's perfect justice. That guy eating his own shit is part of the divine plan. Which, to me, lines up really well with my read on masculinity in the JW movies--perfect, unchangeable, and committing you to endless suffering.

Alright, let's really get into it. This tercet ("Ah, Justice of God, who heaps up / such strange punishment and pain as I saw there? / and why do our sins so waste us?") come early in Canto 7, as Virgil and Dante (our POV character and protagonist) leave the third circle of Hell, Gluttony, and enter the fourth circle, Avarice and Prodigality ("Why do you squander...Why do you hoard" is probably the most famous quote from this circle). If Santino was to end up anywhere, it would be in one of those two circles, so I enjoy that this is the point in the text Dante asks these two questions!

Speaking of: despite God's perfection, Dante sure loves to question what he sees in hell and then...not resolve those questions in any way. It's interesting to see that "who heaps up / such strange punishment and pain as I saw there?" is a question addressed to the "Justice of God" when. well. the Justice of God is the thing heaping up these strange punishments and pain!

Dante seems unaware of the paradox, here, which has a real resonance for me in the way Santino is just like, well, I HAVE to blow up your house, John! I HAVE to put out a hit on you after you fulfill the marker, John! But to point to the times he acted out of compassion (not calling in John's marker during his retirement) would completely undermine that logic. It says "there are some things more important than power," but if Santino acknowledged that, then he wouldn't be able kill his sister.

Dante can't walk through hell and say with his whole chest, "I don't think it should be like this, actually" and still trust and love God, so he doesn't. Santino can't believe "more power will make me more happy, our culture says so," and also consciously acknowledge that it's the culture under the Table (and his father!!! his god!!!) that has pitted him against his sister his whole life, that has instilled in him values that ultimately leave him empty. So he doesn't! And he dies trapped in that paradox.

And then that second question. "And why do our sins so waste us?" UGH. ugh. Dante. You fucking hit me hard with this one. This is the line that made me choose this tercet. There's so much to Santino, so much beauty, so much divinity--but our sins waste us. All that power is used only in pursuit of more power, and, in the end, he's destroyed by that pursuit. The first two lines of the tercet key into culture and the way we contort our selves to fit into culture, but this last line is just an exclamation of the tragedy. Why? we ask, and nobody answers.

[cosmiccyndaquil]

IM SO FUCKIGN CLOSE AUGH PLEASE

(trying to beat pokerogue classic mode i made it PAST the first two elite four with barely any trouble) (im so close. fuck please let me have this one)

[miyku]

[asheanon]

🐌 Post III

A Little Something 🔞 (This one involves some NSFW material - in a way that won't get me banned, of course, but still! Proceed with caution.)

Another 🌌🌹💜 thought.

Sex is neat (for those who enjoy it.) Right? Anyway... Postcoital dysphoria is a real thing too - and it very much makes some appearances for these two earlier on.

In their case, they're both so emotional, yet so guarded and fleeting - and it makes for quite the concoction of feelings in more intimate scenarios. Whenever they have a little fling, it's like magic. But, because it is, it makes the separation and post-fling blues hit even harder. It's in their nature, yes; they both prefer to exit stage left before things get too terribly weird in post. Some degree of awkwardness, agitation (Kuja) and depression (Sal) are anticipated between them and anyone else, mind you, but what is normally a situation that is a little easier to navigate is actually much harder to when "it gets personal." And unfortunately (and fortunately) it gets personal.

Now, that said... It isn't until some quirky little situation unfolds where, like... turns out, it may be in Sal's interest to stay a bit longer vs. leave Immediately one evening and they have to face some weird demons together. And are they actually weird? Yeah. They're pretty weird...

But they do it. They face them. Together. They take ibuprofen. Together.

Really, though, one of the most touching things about watching them go through this phase is seeing that slow realization kick in... that hanging out for just a little bit longer after having some spicy-brand of fun isn't actually all that bad...

By no means is it a perfect process. Especially for Sal, there is still plenty of sadness to be had there, but there is something more than sadness. And it is that more that, well, leads to more later. 💜

Also, just going to throw this out there as well: Outside of the standard that is still-slow-burn cuddles that eventually happen, one little tiny cuddle at a time, my iteration of Kuja is such a shameless, self-indulgent room service guy. There are times where he'll have a little Black Mage fella of a servant bring up something nice on a silver platter before or after the fact. 🥂🧀🍇 (Specifically, tea is a go-to for Sal, since she doesn't really partake in alcohol and he's willing to bend. However, she'll have her moments where she just might have the ittiest-bittiest bit of white wine and she'll bend - she'll never touch the red, though, sorry. Hahaha! Sometimes, a fancy little snack may accompany.~) And if it isn't that (or, in addition) then there's copious amounts of time spent brushing out all the hair between those two (it's absurd) or drawing up a bath, etc. Sickeningly romantic stuff, once you work past those rather awkward beginnings.~

🐌 End Post III

[shawtylike]

fic where nothing bad happens they just love each other and are happy

[clumsy-words-again]

Feeling inspired to make a bi colour themed embroidery floss bracelet right now but I just can’t get myself to do itttttt

[cozy-nostalgia]

🎵🎶

Share in the tags what your most listened to albums/CDs were growing up!

🎵🎶

[seoulmatez]

it’s mother’s day in the us so i can finally show off the card i got for my mama 🦦

[anjuice]

cute kyuushi sketches

[envydean]

Dear brain... Please let me write

Is this looming deadline not enough!

[spookyboywhump]

🌹🌹🌹

____ <- lines of separation. Gimme sentences from two different WIPs

🌹🌹

I didn’t count the lines exactly but it’s fiiiine

Wip one:

“Are you okay? Are you hurt? I’m on my way, what do you need?” He asked.

“I’m fine, I- I’m not hurt, I just… I don’t want to be alone…” He admitted, his voice getting softer. “I’m sorry, I know it’s late, you don’t have to-“

“Zander.” He said, almost sternly. “It’s okay. I’ll be over soon, okay?”

***

Wip two:

He’s beginning to panic, it’s pitch black and he can’t make out where he is, and when he tries to move he hears a chain rattle and something pulls on his ankle. His heart is pounding in his chest, he thinks he’s going to be sick, he just wants to know what the hell is going on.

[hyouhaku]

it irks me soooo much when fic writers and artists call themselves content creators. why would you do that to yourself?- like babe- you make art- it is not meant to be consumed and forgotten but felt and thought of fondly down the line

pls im begging u- you guys are waaaay more imaginative than a cc, way more meticulous than a cc, way more kind than a cc. celebrate your artform for what it is- instead of lumping it down in the content category

[yosh-iro]

just beat gabriel 2 electric railcannonaloo in one sitting in just over 100 tries :,)

[let-me-call-myself-olga]

I just realized this is the last day of pride month so headcanons for the blorbos:

Shuichi-bisexual demiromantic, nonbinary[possibly bigender]

Angie-pansexual biromantic[slight female lean], demigirl

Kiyo-questioning abroromantic, xumgender

Tsumugi-omnisexual[female] panromantic, agender

I ship all four