#A BRIT!!!!!

[solazu1]

Is Caleb Wittebane gay or European? We may never know

[oidheadh-con-culainn]

as an aroace person with limited sexual experience, no interest in watching porn, and poor sex ed as a teen, there IS something simultaneously funny and vaguely tragic about being 28 adult years old and realising how extremely tiny your frame of reference is for genitalia and deciding you should expand this to better understand bodies (yours and others). and then you're just there like "okay so what the fuck do I even google right now, anyway"

[soup-mother]

i just remembered this British backpacking youtuber wanker who went to chechnya (he straight up said it like "chech-nyar") and he was getting a taxi ride and complimenting the car and saying it meant the guy was rich and this Chechen guy was like "you've come here from England and can pay for taxi rides, you are rich. I'm literally a taxi driver" and the guy got so fucking huffy about it because his whole brand was how low cost tourism he was. really helped cement my dislike for cunts who go to a much poorer country, start acting like they're in and savvy with the locals (while gentrifying their eating spots etc) and getting all white guilty about their position as a tourist with money in a strong currency with strong wages. what a cunt.

[stealingpotatoes]

Forever thinking about a headcanon I saw where Anakin and Yoda are cornered by pirates and then Yoda starts just starts talking to them in fluent street Huttese with his backwards syntax while Anakin's brain explodes

the only real-world equivalent of that I can think of is it’s like hearing your headmaster/principal speak roadman so

(commission info // tip jar!)

[reunitedinterlude]

dan pushing phil up hills (2024 // 2016)

[dykesevika]

can’t stop thinking about Sevfreaka ,,,

[thenewgirl76]

Taking advantage of Constantine's tendency to zone out during debriefings, Danny sneaks up on him from behind while invisible and goes eldritch abomination before becoming visible.

Danny: JOHN CONSTANTINE! I'VE COME FOR YOUR PITIFUL SOUL!

Constantine: BLOODY HELL!

*magic blasts Danny, knocking him to the floor and causing him to revert to his normal ghost form*

Constantine: You miserable little brat! I told you to cut that shite out!

*lying on the floor wheezing in both pain and laughter*

Danny: I regret nothing

The rest of the JL and JLD members either snicker in amusement or shake their head in disappointment.

[sentient-stove]

“Over there is Drake, he’s with us because JL Light kept saying no to the teenage group so now they made him my and JLD’s problem. Also he kept trying to raise the dead. And kept succeeding.”

“It’s not my fault it’s so easy,” Drake muttered without looking away from his project. “And Batman wasn’t dead the last time. You bring back three people and suddenly everyone thinks you’re a budding necromancer. It shouldn’t be my fault I’m using the available resources for the best solution.”

Constantine somehow looked even more dead than Elle as he pointed to the teenager that had taken up residence on the counter, the rest of the space covered with no less than four laptops. “Do not see him as a role model. He broke reality that first time.”

Man, she already knew they were going to get along like a house on fire. Elle waved cheerfully at Drake. “Quack.” She said. Constantine just sighed and went for his lighter.

Drake looked at her in befuddlement. “Quack?”

“A drake is a duck yeah? So, quack.”

“I prefer the drakes being dragons route.” He said. “More mysterious and powerful.”

“Ah. Rawr then.” The lesser of the two options. Drake had clearly never met a true duck. Maybe Elle could sneak one in one of these days and introduce Drake to a better namesake.

[hyacinthsdiamonds]

A lot of you underestimate how prevalent British bias is not only in F1 but across sports generally, and even in other industries.

Max saying he has the wrong passport in the paddock is an accurate statement. Do you think he, Seb, or Michael would've been half as vilified by the British media if they had a British passport instead? Would Fernando? Do you think Yuki would get half as much shit about his radio "conduct" if he was British? Because it's the British commentators who consistently have issues with it, and say shit like it's "unbecoming" for a driver to speak that way, ignoring that 1 it's not his first language and 2 IT WAS ENGLISH PEOPLE HE LEARNT THAT LANGUAGE FROM. Sometimes people misspeak, but Yuki has always taken accountability and apologised if he has and if he caused harm. Martin Brundle did not get nearly as much backlash from the media when he misspoke and called an Asian driver a slur while commentating. He also never apologised for it.

Alex, one of the four Brits on the grid but who drives under the Thai flag, has said that the commentators only call him British born when he does well. He was completely excluded from the Silverstone publicity about the home crowd heroes, whereas George, Lewis & Lando were heralded, not only on race weekend, but for weeks leading up to it.

Alex's statement also reminded me of this Richard Harris quote, "When I'm in trouble, I'm an Irishman. When I turn in a good performance, I'm an Englishman." Genuinely, if I took a shot every time a British organisation/person claimed a talented Irish person was actually a Brit, I'd have died from alcohol poisoning years ago.

Hell, I see George wearing the poppy pin this weekend in the lead up to remembrance Sunday. Do you know the amount of shit James McClean gets every year because he refuses to wear one? And he has very valid reasons for choosing not to wear it, yet he's torn to shreds every year by not only random people on the Internet or on the streets but by commentators and the media too.

Because of how this sport became mainstream and because no one challenged Bernie Eccleston's monopoly on broadcasting rights back in the day (people were given the opportunity to buy a share of the broadcasting rights; the idiots said no), this sport has prioritised the British voice/perspective for decades. I know the other broadcasts are just as biased for their home team/drivers, but the British one is the biggest one, as it's the main broadcast for better and more often for the worst. It's the broadcast with the most reach and influence. Their bias has to be challenged eventually if this sport ever hopes to properly expand and grow. The British bias is so difficult to miss once you start noticing it.

[folkoreputation]

i can’t believe taylor swift knows about the existence of a song she herself wrote

[theabigailthorn]

British producers be like: THEM: "We love this! Let us put our heads together and get back to you early next week!" SIX MONTHS LATER UNPAID INTERN FOR THAT COMPANY: "Everyone you spoke to has been sacked, we hate you fuck off."

American producers be like:

THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON YOU'VE EVER MET: Hey kiddo do you wanna meet The Rock? Do you wanna meet Margot Robbie? Do you want to fuck my wife? I can't give you a job but gosh darn it you've got moxxy, let me put you in touch with Doug Bigcheese, the biggest producer in Hollywood! DOUG BIGCHEESE, EMAILING YOU BACK WITHIN 20 MINUTES: Hey kiddo, that guy said you're awesome! Lemme ask round town and in the meantime you can live in my house borrow my car and by the way have you met my wife?!

[oxfords---notbrogues]

[unkreativstermensch]

Corroded Coffin making it big after touring with Metallica, but at this point they’re basically immune to being starstruck ever again (because…well, they’ve toured with Metallica) so they’re pretty chill around famous people.

Fast forward to an award show a couple months later, Eddie brings Steve, Steve brings Robin and while Eddie just mostly stays at their table chatting away with Jeff and James, Steve and Robin get drunk and go absolutely ballistic.

Running around, stealing bread from all the other tables, and doing shots with everyone who’s willing to put up with their antics. At some point Steve comes up to Eddie, hands on his shoulders, excited and giddy and tells him, „Hey Eds, I just talked to Rick Astley! He’s such a nice guy. Robin told him he should release a negative version of his song and just sing ‘then im gonna give you up, then im gonna let you down’ and he actually seemed to consider it as an April Fool’s joke or something.”

And Eddie just looks at him, an amused, fond smile on his lips, says, “that’s great, baby, m’glad you’re having fun“ and presses a kiss to Steve’s neck, before turning around again, resuming his conversation with Kirk about about a song idea.

[lilartifex]

Saw a post by @khorazir and couldn't resist XD

I'd like to imagine the reason Crystal is wearing a Christmas hat is because Charles made her.

Crystal: I'm not wearing that thing, Charles. Charles: Aw, c'mon, one of us has to, and Edwin and I are ghosts, so most of the people we pass won't see it. But if you wear it, then everyone gets a little bit of Christmas cheer from the Dead Boy Detectives! Crystal: I'm NOT wearing - Crystal, three seconds later:

[fanficmanic]

Oliver Stark, who is a British actor, playing an American firefighter, making fun of his boss using a fake British accent.

Holy mother of acting inception.

I bow to your greatness!

[skelitas]

THE STARS AT NIGHT ARE BIG AND BRIGHT

👏👏👏👏

DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS

blacked out for a few days and woke up to Texas Miku 🤠🤧