#99.99% of the time I want him but this is the one role where I want to Be him

[jimmyspades]

Hey. What the hell

[hauntedgarden95]

What would your inquisitor and warden think of what happened in Kirkwall? Would they have supported Hawke’s decisions?

Would your warden or Hawke have actually accepted the role of inquisitor if Cassandra had located them as she’d planned to? Would they have been a good leader for the Inquisition?

If Origins and Inquisition had the 3 personalities (Diplomatic, Sarcastic, Aggressive) which would your warden and inquisitor have predominately been? And what one did your Hawke have?

Sorry this took so long! Work was hectic yesterday!

And thank you!!!!! For sending me these questions! It makes my week everytime that someone is wanting to hear about them!!

Also I apologize I got a tiny bit rambly again:

What would your inquisitor and warden think of what happened in Kirkwall? Would they have supported Hawke's decisions?

Yaviel Amell: 100% supported Winter Hawkes decisions (spare anders, side with the mages). She’s a mage and she watched what the circle did to Anders and again to Jowan. Her initial thoughts on the circle are conflicting at best (my HC is that prior to being in the Circle her mother had taken her from Kirkwall and ran from the templars to Fereldan. They lived in the slums and barely scrapped by. No feeling of security or safety) because of where she was when the Templars inevitably took her from her mother. But by the time the Blight is over she’s been anti-Circle and Templar. In fact it is well known that Carver Hawke and Anders were taken in before the Grey Wardens of Fereldan “disappeared”.

Keira Lavellan: Keira is first and foremost Dalish and then second a mage but she never had the experience that circle mages do. As a Dalish she believes everyone should be free. So I do believe she would have sided with the mages but I think she would have banished Anders. For her own safety and the safety of those she cares about. She would know he was right but she couldn’t condone what he did. But she cares for him as well even then. So she tells him to leave and they both know where he goes anyway. She’s very much a “save whoever you can” kind of person. (sometimes to her detriment)

Would your warden or Hawke have actually accepted the role of inquisitor if Cassandra had located them as she'd planned to?

Yaviel Amell: Yes. And that’s why no one would tell her. Vie is very fatalistic and has a huge Death Wish. Danger is never an issue. She would have also accepted it to keep the weight of gathering such an army off of someone else’s shoulders. Several people go to great lengths to keep her away from it. Until the giant hole in the sky. (Sidenote I have never thought of a Vie as Inky AU but I am now)

Winter Hawke: Nope. No. I’m like 99.99% sure Varric wrote her telling her what Cassandra wanted. And it’s an instant Nope. She would have stayed in hiding if it had been anyone/anything else other than Corypheus.

Would they have been a good leader for the Inquisition?

Vie: HMMM. That’s a harder question. I do see her as a strong leader, she’s been leading her Wardens for years. Even when she disappears on some secret mission for a few years. So I’d go with yes. But maybe I’m biased. The decision on who to leave in the Fade would be hard however. (wish we’d been able to kill the spider honestly). But they would beat Corphyeus rather soundly.

Winter: No. Would she have tried? Also no. She would have dipped out quick and the crew would have willingly helped her hide. But besides the controversy that would just from her being the Inquisitor (It would have bitten you in the ass Cassandra) she really wouldn’t be able to handle it. What happened in Kirkwall was something that just seemed to snowball down a hill and she could do nothing but watch as it grew to a monstrous size. She disappears for this reason. She never wanted any of this fame (or infamy) so as soon as she can she’s gone. Winter leading a chantry led organisation is also hilarious in the aspect that she hates them.

If Origins and Inquisition had the 3 personalities (Diplomatic, Sarcastic, Aggressive) which would your warden and inquisitor have predominately been? And what one did your Hawke have?

So Winter is definitely my sarcastic child. Purple Hawke 100%. And behind it all is a very distressed woman.

Vie is a little harder to decide because I have this problem with never being mean in video games and sometimes the origins choices can be a little basic so it’s hard to kind of get a tone. I’m gonna say a mix of diplomatic and aggressive?

Keira: definitely diplomatic with some sarcastic/charm thrown in. She’s Dalish but she also knows what’s at stake. The main reason she agreed to be Inquisitor is because of Solas telling her the orb is of Elvhen make. Maybe he did it on purpose but it was an instant, “This burden is on your shoulders now. And the safety of our kind also depends on it.” Worked like a charm.

[cto10121]

Okay, FINE, How Are Romeo and Juliet *Actually* Different?

The popular anti claim being that R&J have absolutely ~nothing in common and so would not have worked out in the long run (as if that would negate their love), I’ve spent a lot of my time refuting this awful anti clownery on my blog for good reason. I think it’s fair to say that Shakespeare conceived his R&J as two sides of the same coin, pretty much the same character and personality. So why, then, do antis whine and bitch and even fans prefer one over the other? Why is the Romeo the Death Eater (🤮) and Juliet the Basic Bitch Homewrecker to Poor Rosaline (🤮🤮🤮) clownery even a thing????

Well, apart from general ignorance of the play, fanon taken as canon, and antis being antis, it’s also the fact that Romeo and Juliet are different in a few ways. These differences are shallow and surface level, however, and ultimately are irrelevant to their love dynamic. How so? Let me count the ways…all of 4 (?).

1. One is A Girl and the Other Is A Boy

Yeah, this alone accounts for 99.99% of their differences, no joke.

So R&J are clearly the results of their typically 16th century socialization. Juliet is a girl raised to be obedient, quiet, and can only leave home for church. After her initial greeting to her mother she stands by quietly as her Nurse and her mother talk. She has fewer lines in her introductory scene than freakin’ Ophelia, and her response to the prospect of marriage to Paris is a diplomatic “Meh. Okay. If you want me to.”

Meanwhile Romeo is free to do whatever the fuck he wants whenever he wants. We literally meet Romeo when he has gone AWOL and his parents have no idea what is happening or where he is. They have to employ Benvolio to get the truth out of him. If Juliet is raised like a cloistered nun, Romeo is for the streets. No wonder adaptations have him and his Montague homeboys be so grungy at times.

These differences in gender roles contribute a lot to their personalities. More specifically, to their weighing of risk. Romeo decides to climb Capulet’s wall on a mere moment’s deliberation. Juliet has half a hundred lines alone wrangling over whether Romeo is sincere and not a fuckboy. And although they feel despair and rage at similar things, they show their tempers differently, thus:

2. Juliet Has A Temper, Romeo Has (Virtually) None

Okay, so I have a feeling Juliet getting more riled up than Romeo is 99.99% due to the Nurse being the Nurse. Homegirl will literally try anyone’s patience. And to Juliet Nurse is a more of a mother figure as it is, so of course she would respond more viscerally.

Still, canon evidence is canon evidence. Romeo had to be pushed to extremes by actual manslaughter (and even then he decided to fight only when Tybalt returned). Although Mercutio rags on him constantly, his only response is either to dismiss him or playfully rag him back. He only becomes really dangerous when he learns Juliet is dead—his John Wick moment, in short.

Meanwhile Juliet drops the Nurse like a hot potato after the Nurse advised her to marry Paris instead. The Nurse also mentions how angry she gets when she tells her Paris>>>Romeo. So yeah, don’t mess with Juliet.

That said, Romeo is definitely the most dangerous when he gets angry. Juliet internalizes her anger and grief (see point 1), hence her wanting Death to claim her maidenhead. Romeo is chill, but when pushed sufficiently, will cut a bitch, and very easily too. If Juliet is Jigglypuff, Romeo is Cell Games Gohan.

3. Juliet Is A Better Liar, Romeo Just Evades (Also His One Lie Sucks So Bad, It’s Clownish)

Juliet’s nigh-perfect equivocation to her mother comes to mind, a kind of deceit that is really tricky to pull off. One suspects she has had a lot practice in the past what with her stupid dysfunctional and oblivious parents. She struggles far more with Paris—her disgust for him is so palpable—but luckily for her, Paris is even more oblivious than her parents. Just brain smooth, no thoughts, head empty.

By contrast, Romeo doesn’t lie much or at all. You could argue that he doesn’t really have to—as a more or less independent youth he doesn’t have to give a full account to his parents and there is no real reason to lie to his friends. Mercutio and Benvolio don’t even ask him where he was, just ribbed that he had ditched them. Mercutio assumes he was out getting some; Romeo not only lets him assume this but slyly continues the game of wits until both Mercutio and Benvolio are satisfied at his return to form.

That’s the extent of Romeo’s cleverness in deceit, though. By Act 5 he is unable to persuade his servant Balthazar that he is Totally Fine, No, Really, Go Get the Horses. And then there is this whopper of a line to Balthazar: “Why I descend into this bed of death / Is partly to behold my lady’s face, / But chiefly to take thence from her dead finger / A precious ring, a ring that I must use / In dear employment.”

Romeo was clearly Not Well(tm), but dude. Dude. A ring???? A ring??? You could have stopped at “behold my lady’s face” but no!!!! 🤦‍♀️ No wonder Balthazar just disobeyed him completely. That said…

4. Romeo Is Better At Persuasion (Rhetoric), Juliet Is Just…Not

Okay, so it’s really just that one moment where Romeo successfully persuades the apothecary to sell him poison. He really does give a good argument in very few, terse lines (“fuck the law, it’s screwing you over by keeping you poor,” in short). Part and parcel with his rhetoric ability is his ability to tease, as shown in his battle of wits with Mercutio.

Juliet has some shrewd moments too (“how canst thou be out of breath when thou hast breath to say to me that thou art out of breath???”). But mostly she doesn’t or can’t persuade. Faced with her dumbass parents and uneducated Nurse, she even struggles to get a word in. When she begs her mother to delay the marriage to Paris, Lady C doesn’t even hear her out.

She also fails with the Nurse although, (very interestingly enough), she doesn’t even try to persuade the Nurse to stick with her and Romeo. And again, when the Nurse teases her about Paris being better Romeo, her response is just irritation. So yeah, safe to say that of the two, Romeo is more rhetorically adept.

5. Juliet Blushes Easily and Romeo Is Practically Shameless

I’m thinking chiefly of how much Mercutio rags on Romeo for mooning over Rosaline and Romeo just… dgafs, lol. He shows no embarrassment either for his pursuit of Juliet or his abandonment of his crush on Rosaline. Except for Tybalt’s death, he doesn’t express much guilt over his actions either. At best he doubts himself on occasion—he is no arrogant bro, at the very least.

Meanwhile Juliet does get embarrassed easily, though with very good reason. She blushes and rambles during the balcony scene, and the Nurse even explicitly says she blushes easily (“There goes the wanton blood up thy cheeks”).

Overall, Romeo is a much confident character than Juliet. Again, though, this is also part-and-parcel of their gendered differences and really just a part of Number 1.

6. Romeo Is A Discord Mod, Juliet Is His Kitten

Just kidding. All in all, most of these differences stem from number 1 in some way—gender role socialization is a very real and powerful factor when it comes to personality. Juliet’s introvert personality, her temper and her struggle to make her case reflects more her status as a girl to whom no one listens to or regards. Romeo’s temper, skill with a blade, and rhetorical adeptness comes from his obvious masculinized education.

When it comes to the rock hard traits of R&J’s personalities, however, these differences are mitigated very much and even disappear entirely.

Both have fairly mild tempers all in all, are expressive and charismatic. Both love and feel deeply and passionately, and get overwhelmed by their own powerful emotions. They are both obedient, sweet upper class kids who are pretty well immersed in their respective society and only go the distance for a love connection. They are both very brave and courageous, willing to take risks for each other. They are also equally in love with each other and, as far as them being together goes, are equal partners in love.

[barbariccia]

Do you have a few minutes to talk, one-on-one?

ash’s been facetiming with her sisters at home, wherever home is for her family right now. we get the chance to overhear her sister saying that she saw kaidan in a news vid and that he’s cute, to which we get to raise our eyebrows... unless you’re playing a maleshep, in which case her sister says that you’re the one who’s cute. (naturally, this is the starter for the ashley romance for a mshep.)

ash herself doesn’t think kaidan’s cute - or at the very least, she’s not sweet on him, so we take the chance to ask about her family instead.

Shepard: Did your father serve with the fleet?

Ashley: Yeah. Took any crap posting he could get that offered space time. He worked his ass off trying to get recognised. But he never got above Serviceman Third Class. He was real proud when I made Chief. First thing he did was salute.

Shepard: What about your mother? You haven’t mentioned her.

Ashley: You must know what military wives are like. Strong because they have to be. Able to raise kids while Dad’s away on a six-month cruise. She has a degree in planetary geology. She and Dad both wanted to see new worlds. She gave up her career to raise us, though.

innocuous enough, but it stands out to me that ash’s family is all still hale and healthy. maybe that’s just a byproduct of the final fantasy franchise, where i’ve gotten used to a 99.99% rate of at least one parental death for characters within the series (as an aside, if you can tell me one character who has both parents alive other than zack fair, i’ll publicly endorse you for whatever role you want to lead), but also within the normandy so far. the rest of our crew has either committed patricide, is estranged from one parental unit, or just straight up hasn’t mentioned one or both of them, so a full family unit isn’t exactly something to be sniffed at.

on its own, i don’t need to highlight the parentification that ashley’s been party to for her whole life - she mentions she’s the eldest of four sisters, with the youngest still being in high school. and ash is only 25! she’s had to have worked her absolute ass off to attain that kind of position and be relied on by her parents to help with the other kids, and i just... i respect ashley so much. let’s not forget that first contact only occurred the year before she was born. there’s been a lot of change in her life, both as quick as the digital age upon us in the last decade or two, and slow over her years of growing up.

we get to ask about her sisters in more depth; she says her relationship with the youngest, sarah, was rocky for a while up until the point where sarah got a boyfriend that wanted to go further than she did. her other sisters worried as well, and ashley was posted in the same galaxy, but too far away to make it back quickly if something happened.

Shepard: If he really liked her, he wouldn’t be pushy.

i really like her dialogue here, honestly. it’s a real human response of her! ash definitely feels like the most real of the characters aboard the ship, to me - her responses to things are flawed and shitty, but she’s self aware of it to a degree, and she’s not the kind of person that acts black and white, either end of the morality scale. who among us can really say that they’re the pinnacle of human morals? even the best of us have thought things like this before, in varying contexts - even if we don’t verbalise them. doesn’t make us bad people... just human.

sarah’s boyfriend thought he’d try and persuade her into having sex, and sarah herself threw him into a tree and left him then and there. the williams parents had all their daughters learn some kind of self-defense - ash herself was taught hand-to-hand, sarah learned aikido, the second eldest got pistol training, and the third picked up the sword, which is just. utterly hilarious on a galactic scale considering the setting. i think i love the williams family.

Shepard: Didn’t you call the police?

Ashley: [Sarah] said it wouldn’t solve the real problem. And she and Mike would both become household names. It was a small colony. I said it was her call to make. That we should let her do it her way. Mom was pretty pissed about that.

ash took leave to walk her sister to school and back, and on the last day of her leave, the boy in question was waiting after school.

so this SURE IS A STORY,

and that’s the end of the talk about her sisters. it makes me feel fuzzy that these girls - no matter how not real they are - have the presence of mind to deal with an abuser so calmly, but at the same time... leaves me feeling tired. not that i expect humans to ever really change, especially not in only a hundred odd years, but for this setting to be so expansive, for there to be bigger problems and more people around than anyone could ever have dreamed... and yet entitlement and abuse still runs rampant.

this is its own problem within the universe, that despite everything, a female shepard doesn’t quite have the same footing as a male shepard does in certain situations, but i’ll get to those when i get to it. besides... i suppose there are bigger things happening now in the real world than anyone could ever have dreamed of seeing, and petty problems still win out in terms of importance. doesn’t matter how small your problem is if it’s personal.

we’re not done quite yet, though.

Ashley: Dad always wanted to serve in space. But he wanted us to have real ground under our feet. He’d say, “Space is beautiful, but you can’t raise a family there.”

Ashley: “I cannot rest from travel: I will drink life to the lees. All times I have enjoy’d greatly, have suffer’d greatly, both with those that loved me, and alone. For always roaming with a hungry heart. Much have I seen and known. Cities of men, and manners, climates, councils, governments...”

Ashley: “Ulysses” was Dad’s favourite poem. Every time he shipped out, he recorded me reading it. He had a dozen versions when he retired.

Shepard: Does he still like it?

Ashley: I sure hope so. I read it to his grave every time I go home.

Lord Alfred Tennyson was a well known (and still popularised) British poet, best known for his poems The Charge of the Light Brigade, which i studied at school, and Ulysses. his work is still felt today with phrases that became commonplace from his work, like the lines “tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all”.

the lines ash quotes specifically are about the restlessness of wanderlust and wanting to live life utterly to the fullest, feeling nostalgic for the times when the subject was doing just that, and the full poem continues and ends with the assertion that the speaker’s goal is to continue living life wholeheartedly until the end, and even beyond.

speaking of the beyond-

Ashley: That’s not a problem with you, is it? That I believe in God?

and we reach out to take the hand of yet another utterly fascinating facet of ashley. we’ve seen religion briefly within the game so far - the preaching hanar on the citadel comes immediately to mind - but there’s always been a feeling within sci-fi that because the universe can now be explored that god isn’t real and that things like faith are tossed to the wayside in favour of scientific exploration and discovery, even though in the grand scheme of things people tend... not to behave like that, on the whole. i vastly, enormously appreciate ashley for keeping her faith, and for it to be really not a huge part of her character. at no point is she reduced to any stereotype of character, whether that be “gun-toting god-fearing soldier babe”, or “i am religious therefore i must preach” - it, like other parts of her personality, are only parts that make up a whole and do not define her.

i love ashley. she’s such a good character.

[rayneul]

Ray Route Bad Ending 3 Guide

(donʼt/never answer messages it give good heart so i suggest dont answer it :))

Day 8 (100%)

01:37 – Rapid Contact

Selection 1 I can’t sleep.

Selection 2 I might need some help now…. (Nothing)

Selection 3 There’s something wrong with the chatroom.

Selection 4 I’m scared…

Selection 5 …. Then what will happen to me?

Selection 6 That’s because I have to keep my promise with Ray… (Ray)

Selection 7 …Did you read what I’ve been writing so far?

Selection 8 I want to go rest now… I’m tired….

Selection 9 Wow…what’s it about? (Nothing)

Selection 10 But right now we have more important matter at hand. (Ray)

Selection 11 I think it’s better not to miss anything that could raise our name value.

Selection 12 I think it all depends on his luck…

Selection 13 But you can’t pessess and actor on stage.

Selection 14 I’m into games.

Selection 15 I’m too scared to sleep alone…

No Caller ID & 707 Calling

- Yes I am… Who is this?

- No recording, please.

- There’s one missing.

- I can’t hear you.

- Was it you just know who pulled the prank?

- What if I get caught lying?

 03:46 – What Should I Do with You

Selection 1 Yes…?

Selection 2 I thought you’d be mad if I don’t….

Selection 3 Please don’t play with me….

Selection 4 Okay….

Selection 5 Maybe….

Selection 6 Why would you be mean with food…? (Nothing)

Selection 7 I’ll be good to you!

Selection 8 How can I make you happier?

Selection 9 I’ll get used to it fast….

Selection 10 I’m sorry…

Selection 11 I’ll do anything you tell me… Please don’t throw me away.

Story Mode – This is ridiculous…

- Ray has become different… I  was so alarmed.

- No longer here…?

- Can’t you save me…?

 Saeran Calling

- It would have been great if I could help you with hacking skills.

- I’m ready.

- I’m drawing it while listening. Keep talking please.

- Don’t imprison me…

07:21 – In My Opinion

Selection 1 Is it because of the governmental commendation? (Nothing)

Selection 2 Seven, you don’t have another you hisdden within, do you…?

Selection 3 It’d be near impossible to win….

Selection 4 Now there’s stronger and smarter hacker. Because the one before him was no good.

Selection 5 I’m scared….

Selection 6 The part will be held, right…?

Selection 7 Hello….

Selection 8 Don’t you think it’s better to accept when an offer is made?

Selection 9 Isn’t it a little suspicious that Seven is against it? I thought he liked anything that’s free.

Selection 10 Please trust Seven a little more. (707)

Selection 11 You didn’t want commendation because of your guilt.

Selection 12

So you don’t deserve the commendation….

Selection 13 I’m going to vote for you!

Selection 14 I think he offered the commendation only because he’s V’s fan.

Selection 15 We will be holding parties, right?

Selection 16 Good idea! (Email from housekeeper)

Selection 17 What files? Are they important? Can you send them to me too?

Selection 18 Have a good one.

Selection 19 You must be feeling awfully sorry.

Selection 20 Are you stitching right now?

Selection 21 Be careful not to prick your finger! (Nothing)

Jumin Calling

- Do you oppose in receiving the government commendation?

- Maybe…because of political reasons?

- Worst scenario?

09:03 – FINALLY

Selection 1 Zen… Can you talk to me..? This is so hard….

Selection 2 Now all you have to do is go out there and show them what you’re made of! (Nothing)

Selection 3 I don’t see anythng noteworthy apart from your face.

Selection 4 Hey…

Selection 5 Sounds delicious…. (Ray)

Selection 6 It feel so good to see someone else showing the evil I can’t….

Selection 7 I think I prefer bad guys.

Selection 8 I’m hungry…

Selection 9 But he added love. You should eat it….

Selection 10 I have a bad feeling about this.

Selection 11 Let’s throw it away and make a new one.

Selection 12 Did the luck really burn…?

Selection 13 Precious is food….

Selection 14 Make sure you’re on time. (Nothing)

Selection 15 Hungry…

Selection 16 Does it really make me lucky?

Selection 17 Can I cut them in chunks? (Nothing)

Selection 18 Yoosung, wanna marry me?

Selection 19 Back there you were neglecting your stew while chatting, weren’t you?

Selection 20 Yoosung, you’re adorable.

Selection 21 I’m going to enjoy it with my bias.

Selection 22 But I can’t even share it. I think I’m getting hungrier…

11:16 – I Really Want to Know!

Selection 1 Did the stew taste good?

Selection 2 I think so… You’ve done well. (Nothing)

Selection 3 Are you just going to leave me here?

Selection 4 There’s not much time. (Ray)

Selection 5 I wonder why you didn’t get a contact, Yoosung… (Nothing)

Selection 6 Why would you want to make sure?

Selection 7 Are you that timid?

Selection 8 I think Seven has so many stories….

Selection 9 Yes, I will. If there’s something I can do. (Ray) Depending on the situation.

Selection 10 Alright. Run along.

Selection 11 Can you call the prosecution series to find me?

Selection 12 Zen… I’m sure it’s nothing! (Ray)

Selection 13 IS this what the lucky stew brought upon you?

Selection 14 This isn’t related to me, is it…?

Selection 15 Didn’t you say V is calling you? (Nothing)

Selection 16 Yes, please do.

Yoosung Calling

- What are you uneasy about, he’s only being interview. Yoosung..did you…did you do something?

- Wow. What if that’s the case? I’m suddenly feeling uneasy too…

13:58 – Very Shocking

Selection 1 This is so shocking.

Selection 2 I’m the one who’s suffering the most…

Selection 3 Are you sure RFA is still innocent?

Selection 4 Or maybe Zen had a stalker.

Selection 5 Long is the pathway of stitching…

Selection 6 Do you think V will be willing to do that?

Selection 7 You’re leaving already?

Selection 8 I’d say it’s 96.74999654%!

Selection 9 Jumin, don’t you have to go now?

Selection 10 Maybe things will turn out the way an authority wants to…

Selection 11 Sure. You need to work anways.

Selection 12 I’ll try.

 Jaehee Calling

- If it’s Zen, I don’t think there’s anything to worry about!

- Why don’t you look into it through the intelligence unit?

- I predict it as 99.99%!

16:04 – V’s Decision

Selection 1 I’m nervous….

Selection 2 You mean the hacker’s attack that’s still going on?

Selection 3 Have you now realized that you’re not good enough.

Selection 4 No…. If you cancel the party, then I…

Selection 5 It doesn’t sound completely rational.

Selection 6 You mean we’re not going to hold the party? (Nothing)

Selection 7 No… What if I’m thrown away?

Selection 8 But then won’t that affect the guests in a bad way?

Selection 9 Okay…

Selection 10 For what?

Selection 11 I don’t think I can trust you…

Selection 12 I’m scared… It feels like something will fall upon me.

Selection 13 My introduction to the RFA itself is a secret…. (Ray)

Selection 14 He must have a secret mission of his own….

Selection 15 Doesn’t that mean the messenger will soo be in crisis because of the hacker?

Selection 16 Bye.

Story Mode – Okay, that’s enough edge for today

(Door Opened)

- I don’t deserve to make any thought.

- I…think you’re amazing.

- I don’t deserve to say no.

- Yes…

- Yes…

- Yes.

 V Calling

- V…this is tough.

- It’s nothing.

- Would you have made that decision if you were truly worried of me? What are you going to do if I do fall in danger?

18:31 – Sorry. This is all my fault.

Selection 1 Zen! Is your interrogation over? (Nothing)

Selection 2 Since you’re talking about selfies, I’m guessing nothing big happened? (Nothing)

Selection 3 What happened to the rehearsal? (Nothing)

Selection 4 Maybe that’s one of the emergency features of the app. Everything going on in here is confidential, you know? (Nothing)

Selection 5 Probably…..

Selection 6 Seven you must be busy.

Selection 7 There won’t be a party. Looks like I’m not useful anymore.

Selection 8 The party’s intention was never good in the first place…. It’s all V’s fault.

Selection 9 Is this true? (Nothing)

Selection 10 So what did you tell them? (Nothing)

Selection 11 It’s too late. You need to tell us what’s going on.

Selection 12 You sure have a lot of secrets.

Selection 13 Are you running away…? Though that is one option….

Selection 14 Where are you going? (Nothing)

Selection 15 Seven can manage himself. He’ll be fine… right?

Selection 16 Even if you do, he won’t tell you what you want… As always.

Selection 17 Will you come save me if I’m in trouble…?

 Zen Calling

- I’m worried that your looks would have deteriorated.

- What’s there to be complicated about? You’re done with the prosecution interview, the party on hold is V’s decision, and Seven… he’ll take care of it himself.

 20:48 – Cornered

Selection 1 Didn’t V say that he has a favor to ask you? (Nothing)

Selection 2 Can’t we talk to V to change his mind?

Selection 3 Do you think they’re also watching ‘me?’ (Nothing)

Selection 4 Tell me a secret. Anything is fine. Even if there won’t be a party, I must prove that I’m useful…

Selection 5 What is he up to now?

Selection 6 It’s fairly common to see an innocent people framed after a single wrong move… I should know. (Ray)

Selection 7 V guaranteed my identification. You shouln’t be suspicious of me.

Selection 8 Even if I do something wrong and someone finds out…I’ll be thrown away before someone arrives.

Selection 9 I need to do as they tell me….

Selection 10 Even if I do, I know that you’ll throw me out faster than they can save me.

Selection 11 I’m sorry….

Selection 12 Please don’t do that….

Selection 13 Am I useless now?

Selection 14 What are you going to do to me…?

Selection 15 Please don’t throw me away…

Selection 16 Okay… What do you want me to do?

Selection 17 I’m scared….

Selection 18 …I can only do what I’m told to do anyways.

Selection 19 Okay…. (Nothing)

Selection 20 I’ll try.

 707 Calling

- I’ve lost contact with the RFA members! Please let me get in touch!

- Can you hear me? Tell V that we must have the party! If not, I…

22:14 – Treasure

Selection 1 Role play.

Selection 2 Hello…Ray.

Selection 3 Saeran and I are doing well… (Ray)

Selection 4 I don’t remember them very well… I must have forgotten because I’m an airhead.

Selection 5 I think so….

Selection 6 Now I know… That I’m nothing special…

Selection 7 Bye…

 Saeran Calling

- I’m not up to something. I’ll here quietly.

- Yes. I understand. Do as you like.

23:39 – Survival of the Fittest

Selection 1 Why won’t you come see me?

Selection 2 I never thought about that. I’m too stupid to reach that part.

Selection 3 Do I deserve to see her…?

Selection 4 Hello, my savoir.

Selection 5 Where is Ray? My savoir! Please love me… Aren’t you the founder of the RFA…? (Ray)

Selection 6 My savoir…?

Selection 7 I made a mistake… Please let me make up for it!

Selection 8 It’s all my fault. I’m an airhead.

Selection 9 So you did save Ray…!

Selection 10 He must enjoy torturing me.

Selection 11 So you’re saying…I am useful, aren’t you?

Selection 12 …Now I know that I’m weak.

Rika Calling

- Not interested. He’s not Ray.

- Are you trying to say is that you saved him?

[juju-on-that-yeet]

Extraneous

Prompt: Whumptober Day 26, Abandoned

Summary: Plus and his fellow Googles have been captured. When the other Googles escape without him, Plus is forced to consider his place among his brothers, and whether he has a place among them at all.

Warnings: Kidnapping, isolation, fear of abandonment

Tagging: @peribloke​ @tired-eldritchhorror (ask to be tagged!)

Read on AO3 (Full Whumptober Series)

Enjoy!

~

Plus does not struggle against the chains holding him down. He does not try to spit the gag out of his mouth. His skin senses the exact amount of pressure bearing down on it, his mind calculates the exact amount of force needed to break himself free. He also calculates how much force he’s currently capable of exerting, and it’s less than normal, thanks to the electric shocks he’s constantly being given by his captors. He is not currently strong enough to break his bonds, so he does not waste his energy in trying.

The humans who have imprisoned him don’t seem to understand that, however, and gloat at Plus as if he’s given up, given into despair. Plus is certainly not happy right now, but he knows that the odds of him escaping eventually are good. His brothers have been captured as well, and are being kept somewhere else in the dingy warehouse Plus is sitting in, but the likelihood that a few humans possess the resources to keep all four of them contained for a long time is extremely low. And once one of them escapes, the odds of him fleeing without trying to break his brothers free are slim to none.

Plus does not need to panic or struggle. He merely needs to let statistics run their course.

Eventually, though, the humans around him find something out that makes them nervous. No, not nervous, afraid. Plus cannot hear them; they’ve put plugs in his ears, and though they cannot block out all sound, they muffle most of it, and Plus can’t determine what’s gotten the humans so rattled. Has one of his brothers escaped? It’s possible. Plus waits to see what will happen.

After a while, one human (his name is Ryan, his observed behavior suggests he’s the leader) approaches Plus to talk to him. He’s unhappy, no, angry, and he sneers with annoyance as he speaks.

“Looks like the other androids got away,” he growls, “You’re the only one left, so we’re making sure as hell that you aren’t going anywhere until we find a buyer for you.”

That confuses Plus a little bit. Have his brothers escaped? Are they still in the building? Ryan seems to notice his confusion and laughs.

“What, are you surprised?” he chuckles, “Did you think they were gonna come back for you? Why would they? You’re all robots anyway, I doubt any of you are even capable of caring. They skipped out and left you here. Lucky you, huh?”

He doesn’t tell Plus anything more, and Plus is left alone with his thoughts. The humans rig up a taser to shock Plus every so often and keep him weak enough to stay put. Plus has nothing to do but think, and think he does.

He ponders what he was told over and over. Ryan didn’t lie; at least not intentionally. Plus could tell by the lines in his face and the quality of his voice that he was telling the truth as much as he understood it. And it’s true that Plus’s brothers have not come for him. Minutes turn to hours since they supposedly escaped, and nothing happens. This outcome is nearly impossible…but only nearly. Even something with a 99.99% probability still has a 0.01% chance of failure.

Then again, the longer Plus stays trussed up and injured in his chains, alone, the more he begins to wonder if he miscalculated the odds from the beginning.

He’s aware, from the vast amount of knowledge at his fingertips, of the rule of three. It’s a convention of the western world, not so much a rule but a pattern, a commonly found constant. Plus sees it in himself: He lists things in threes when speaking to others, he counts down from three when conducting experiments, he runs a minimum of three trials with every experiment, and he notices when the pattern of threes is thrown off. He sees it in writing, from ancient folklore to modern works: Three bears and three little pigs, three wishes and three trials, three acts, three characters, and often, in old stories, three siblings. It makes sense: A conversation can support three people comfortably, but a fourth addition will always be on the outskirts. People gravitate to threes.

Even Mark, possibly, had the rule of three in his mind when he gave Google three brothers. But connected though Plus is to his fellow triplets, they are not the only brothers. Google is there, too; he’s the originator, the oldest, the leader. He cannot be the one left out. Neither can Oliver: He’s the heart, different from the others with his kindness. Chrome cannot be left out either: He’s the one with anger, with violence, power and rage and impulsiveness to counter Google’s cool-headed maturity.

But what of Plus? What is Plus, among these brothers?

Is he the smart one? Of course not; he’s analytical and logic-minded but no more than the rest of his brothers. He isn’t as kind as Oliver, but he’s not unnecessarily cruel. He isn’t as angry as Chrome, but he’s not impassive. He doesn’t have the commanding presence that Google does, and he’d much rather follow his older brother’s lead and soak up his advice than command his fellow triplets along. There’s nothing about him that’s unusual, nothing that facilitates his role in the group. He’s a muddled mish-mash of the other Googles. Unnecessary. Extra. Superfluous.

Well, the rule of three is one thing, but aren’t pairs common, too? Plus looks for solace there, but finds none. Oliver and Google gravitate to each other as a study in opposites: Oliver idolizes Google more than his fellow triplets, and Google knows to treat him gently. Plus supposes that he has Chrome, his twin within a triplet, but Chrome has Yandere, too. If Google and Oliver are opposites, Chrome and Yandere are from the same mold, both violent and impulsive and emotional energy. Plus doesn’t begrudge their relationship, doesn’t mind their brotherhood. But he wonders, sometimes, if Chrome can really be called his twin anymore.

There is another rule, too, in western convention, maybe even worldwide: Never go alone. Never split up to cover more ground. If three is a crowd and two is a perfect pair, then one is the worst.

But here Plus is.

Alone.

Away from home.

Waiting to be sold for parts.

He doesn’t want to lose faith. He doesn’t want to believe they left without him. He runs the numbers, recalibrates, recalculates. Every minute he stays there and stays trapped without his brothers coming to help, the probability that he’s been left behind increases, increases. The odds they’ll ever come back at all decrease, decrease. He can’t reach them with his network; the humans have all sorts of proxies and signal jammers in the warehouse to stop him from getting help on his own. Plus has to rely on his brothers retracing their steps and coming back for him, but why would they? Why would they come back for the fourth brother, the disrupter of the trio, the unnecessary triplet, the one that has nothing to offer? Every time he starts to think he’s gone too far into these thoughts, that maybe his calculations don’t put enough faith in his brothers, the automatic taser shocks him back into despair.

He still does not struggle. He still does not attempt to speak. He knows he is still too weak, it is still pointless. At some point he starts to cry, but his expression does not change: Sedate and subdued, emotionless, yet with eyes streaming tears. He can’t wipe tears away due to his chains, so soon he cannot see. He has no need to blink with the constant moisture in his eyes. He has no need to move. He has no need or ability to do anything at all but remain still, motionless like a statue, watching the odds of rescue get smaller and smaller.

He is still acutely aware of time passing. He has to be for his calculations. One day passes, then another. The same thinking, the same calculating, the same circular observations on pairs and threes and loneliness.

Then, on the third day, something changes.

He hears shouting from the other floors, hears yells of speech and yells of pain. He can tell the difference but not what’s being said; his earplugs are still in, and the sounds he hears from other floors are faint and indistinct. But it’s more than he’s heard in a while, so he listens. Eventually he closes his eyes for the first time in two days. He doesn’t know what it is, and it doesn’t matter. He’s made the calculations, he knows the statistics.

But the statistics fail him again, because muffled footsteps run up to him, muffled words are shouted to him, then the earplugs are removed and everything is suddenly louder, hands are suddenly pulling the gag out of his mouth, then the hands are breaking his chains. In the background are sounds of an ongoing fight. The same hands that freed Plus from his bonds grab his face, brush tears away.

“Plus, open your eyes, it’s me,” says…says…

Says the minuscule probability.

Says Google.

Plus’s eyes shoot open automatically. Google is staring at him, worried, almost afraid, but when is Google ever afraid?

“Blue, is he okay??” screams Oliver from a distance, still in the middle of a fight keeping humans at bay.

“We’re almost done with these assholes,” yells Chrome, fighting alongside Oliver, “Let’s get out of here fast!”

“Plus, don’t cry anymore,” Google says, quietly astonished, “We’re here, we’re taking you home.”

“Wh…” Plus’s voice is out of practice from his two days of silence. “Where did you go?”

He doesn’t mean to sound so small. He doesn’t mean to sound so brokenhearted. He doesn’t mean to make Google make that face, like his core’s been torn out of his chest.

“We didn’t want to leave you behind,” Google murmurs, aching and sad, “But we were in no condition to free you. We would’ve been recaptured if we’d tried to find you, so we went home, recovered, and came back.” He strokes Plus’s cheeks with his thumbs, catching tears. “We’re here now. We’re sorry it took so long.”

The calculations, the statistics, the rule of three, the theme of pairs, they all fall out of Plus’s mind in an instant. He tells himself to stop crying. He starts sobbing instead, grabbing desperately onto Google. Google hugs him just as tight, strokes his hair, tries to shush him. That’s when other footsteps approach them, and two more bodies press in on either side. Someone on his right presses a kiss to his temple – Oliver, he’s the only brother who ever gives Plus kisses. Someone on his left squeezes his shoulder – Chrome, he’s the one who comforts with pressure. More arms wrap around him, and Plus can’t help but keep crying as his brothers surround him with warmth. How could he ever think they’d abandon him? It feels like a betrayal.

“I’m sorry, I thought, I thought,” Plus wails.

“Shh,” Google tells him, “It’s alright, Plus.”

“We love you, shamrock,” Oliver whispers, sounding as though he’s crying, too.

“We’d never leave you, Green, no matter what,” Chrome promises.

Eventually, Google stands, sweeping Plus into his arms to carry him. Oliver and Chrome follow, still keeping one hand on Plus each like they’re afraid to let him go. They leave as a solid unit of four, statistically improbable, but viable all the same.

[cupofteaguk]

exchanges (m)

summary: in which Jeon Jungkook is that friendly neighborhood superhero, you’re the face in the hallway that saved his high school career, and he can’t ever seem to get a grip around you. even when he makes you scream after a fated accident—not for the reason you may be thinking; get the thought out of your head! 

pairing: jungkook x fem!reader

genre: spiderman au | fluff/smut

warnings: descriptions of bullying, minor injury, unprotected sex 

word count: 14k

.

(the present)

If Jeon Jungkook is against anything in his life, it’s one’s ability to exaggerate certain situations or problems to make those things seem much bigger than they probably were. Well, actually, take that back. It’s not that he’s against it per say, it’s just that his peer’s daily struggles of pop quizzes and missing the morning bus aren’t exactly headliner news—especially in comparison to what he has to go through.

Jeon Jungkook is against exaggeration, probably because he can’t get away with it himself. It’s not that he doesn’t like to exchange his fair share of embellished stories or fabricated events weaved into true experiences, it’s that he can’t afford to do so. Sharing stories of his nightly routines and dashing superhero adventures may seem great, but only if he could manage the burden of a personal life and a masked life intertwining.

As an 18-year-old boy, he can probably say it's safe to assume that he cannot. Manage the overwhelming, opposite pressure both of his lives take him, that is. It's difficult enough being a college freshman, a tiny fish in an ocean of whales and sharks, but throw in his late night Spiderman facade would be too much of a tale to share with other people and peers who probably ask too many questions and know too much about him. He's never liked the exposure that comes with being in the spotlight, and he can't hide behind his mask if people knew who he was.

Oh. Right. Speaking of his Spiderman facade, that's who is he. Haven't heard of him? You know, the dashing hero of Seoul, red and blue spandex attire with a web shooter, fine tuned senses and amazingly quick reflexes? The boy who swings around the city, volunteering for trouble and always coming out right on top? The boy who constantly maintains that casual, slightly amused tone throughout a majority of his rescues?

Yeah, well, that's Jungkook.

It's a role he has occupied gladly for about two years at this point, after an unfortunate accident at a lab he was interning at during his junior year of high school cursed him with these abilities of spider-like sensibility. Rather than run away from his powers, he chose instead to embrace it and it's almost been two and a half years at this point and he doesn't see any signs of stopping. He keeps that shadow of his life private, refusing to indulge, avoiding those conversations like the plague, keeping a wry eye out in a way that usually isn't perceived as paranoia, and for the first two years of his Spiderman role, he actually gets along quite nicely.

Until one eventful night, a day he remembers quite clearly leading up to that point. It's a Tuesday when it happens, a domino effect of bad luck prior to the inevitable in a way that tells Jungkook that perhaps he shouldn't have been all that taken aback that something like this would happen to him. First off, he had overslept his alarm that morning, leaving in a mad rush across the campus to try and get to his art lecture on time. His calculus professor had completely called him out today for his decreased academic performance on the last test—although to be fair, Jungkook actually didn't study for that test, he was too busy stopping an armed robbery at a bank. His history professor had dropped a pop quiz on the class, an assignment that Jungkook is almost 99.99% sure he had failed.

He had known that perhaps after all those things, the best way to spend the rest of his evening would have been to actually pick up a book and actually try to study for history or actually put some effort into a math question that would probably only take 10 minutes to complete. But no. Jungkook wouldn't be Jungkook if he didn't chase the nightlife, didn't chase after the rush and thrill of the powers he still hasn't completely grown accustomed to having. He had decided, instead, to dawn on the red and blue spandex, adjust the web shooters he had to manufacture on his own, before taking to the sky. There's always a difficulty sneaking out of the dorms, and even more so trying to get off the campus. But he moves with a certain stealth and a certain practiced grace that he's learned to embrace that excitement of sneaking off a college campus.

It's returning back that night that changes everything, all because of a dormitory power outrage and just the simple fact that Jungkook doesn't really know the layout of the building (or the placement of his room) as well as he thought he did. The ever-present darkness that encompasses the complex leaves Jungkook with little option but to estimate the area of which he believes his own dorm is located, as he crawls his way up the windows, pretty confident that he lived on the third floor, fourth window over from the edge.

Or was it the third floor, sixth window from the edge?

Fuck.

This momentary lapse in his assurance comes a little too late, however, because he lets down his guard at the sight of seeing an opened window. He always left his window open before leaving, so maybe he's been overthinking the situation and maybe he really does know the location of his dorm from the outside.

So he slides through, landing with a soft plop onto the carpet as he lets the exhaustion of the day finally start to catch up to him. Because of the darkness, the only light coming in through the moonlight, he fails to notice the Captain America posters that line the walls, or the polaroids from strings, or the floral print on the bed as he lets out a sigh into what he thinks is an empty dorm and practically throws himself atop what he thinks is his mattress.

A shift of movement underneath him, a startled scream, jerks Jungkook out of his lapse into dreamland as he springs out of bed at the same time the figure underneath him straightens up as well.

“What the fuck!” A startlingly familiar voice cries from below.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry—I’m sorry, I thought this was my room—!”

At once, the lights overhead turn on and the sight makes Jungkook's heart drop, beat a sudden mile a minute, and also feel as if it might crawl up his throat all at once. He feels his breath catch in his throat, the color flush against his cheeks that would probably match the red of his uniform had it not been for the mask covering his face—but this reaction to seeing someone in a bed is not for the reason one may think.

Because sitting in said bed, blanket pulled up to chest, no makeup, hair reduced to waves and curls that spray out across shoulders, eyes wide, but still the same face that he's spent the past three years admiring and crushing on hard from afar—is you.

Yes, you. The same you he's been crushing on for three years, the same you who smiled at him in the halls as if he was the only person in the room that mattered, the same you who didn't hesitate to help him gather his books back when he was getting shoved into lockers and being told that he would never mean anything to anyone.

You were alway the exception to his tragic high school life, one that is defined by his attempts to get a hang of his powers whist balancing school and his worrying parents, and trying to stop flinching every single time he turned the corner in the school hallway. You were always better, always that shimmering stardust in the pits of his night sky, as cliche as that sounds. To say he's been in love with you for three years would probably be a bit dramatic, given that the pair of you have rarely ever even exchanged a word of conversation since he met you, but the small hellos and shy waves of acknowledgment the pair of you have been exchanging since the very first encounter would probably be enough to say that Jungkook has always been incredibly fond of you and nothing in his right mind was going to change that.

He had heard through the grapevine that you would be attending the same university as him, and felt a mixture of apprehension and excitement at the thought of being able to see more of you around the campus and outside of the embarrassment that was his high school career. Even though the college campus is much bigger, and the differing majors keeps the pair of you apart, he really does learn to cherish the moments he can catch a glimpse of you around the campus. Whether it's walking to your classes, or talking to a friend, or reading a book, or listening to the music, he feels like they're all pieces of the puzzle that make up your life and he wants to learn as much as he can. Is that creepy?

Maybe. But okay. Back to reality.

The reality where he's standing right across from you, close enough where he can see the rapid rise and fall of your chest and the wild look in your eyes. It looks as if you had been seconds away from drifting off to sleep and while he feels bad for interrupting that process, since he can only assume from the bags underneath your eyes that you aren't getting as much sleep as you would probably like, there's also a swelling in his chest and a rapid thumping of his heart because if he had known he was going to be seeing you today, he might have tried to avoid the sight of him in a ridiculously tight spandex attire.

Speaking of the spandex attire.

It's something your eyes brush down upon immediately, taking in the red and blue mix of the fabric to the black spider across his chest and your eyes grow wider, but with a different kind of recognition. You're about to open your mouth to say something, anything, and his heart is in his throat and he thinks you might scream again, but a sudden pounding against the door of your dorm startles the pair of you out of your resolve.

You meet his gaze across the way, eyes alert and a thousand questions packed into a flicker.

Another knock jerks you into movement as you kick off the covers and make your way to the door, leaving Jungkook little choice but to throw himself behind the bed and hope that the boxes and drawers you have packed underneath your bed would do enough to keep him hidden from whoever lay waiting on the other side.

He can hear you throwing open the door. "A-Ah, hey Namjoon, what's up?"

"You alright?" A deep voice inquires immediately, and Jungkook recognizes the voice and your acknowledgment of the figure on the other side as Kim Namjoon, the RA of the hall. Even though he knows he's in absolutely no position to feel this way, Jungkook can't help the pang of jealousy that spikes itself in his heart. Did Namjoon have any idea how difficult it was for Jungkook just to inhale oxygen around you? How could the older boy speak to you with such ease?

But Jungkook keeps his mouth shut. It's not like he's in a position to start snapping about that right now.

"I heard you scream," Namjoon continues from whatever previous conversation you and the older boy had been having while Jungkook was dozing off.

"O-Oh right," You say in a small, slightly squeaky voice. "Sorry for worrying you, I just... fell off the bed," You end lamely. "I was napping and didn't know the power had gone out, so when it did go on I guess I just started freaking out. Sorry about that."

"Oh, alright," Namjoon dismisses, although he doesn't sound entirely convinced. Jungkook wonders just how much time you and Namjoon spend together for the older boy to get accustomed to your tone of voice and how the air around you hangs and the thought only leaves an even more bitter tang in the pit of his stomach. "Just be more careful next time."

"I know," You wave away, and Jungkook can practically hear the smile in your voice, knowing the tone of it from his own personal experience from the handful of small conversations the pair of you have shared in the past. "But it's good now. Thanks for checking up on me."

"Of course. See you tomorrow."

That's the last words Namjoon gets to throw in before you're closing the door, and Jungkook can hear the shift of your movements as you spin on your heel to face the vicinity of your dorm once more. "U-Um," You stammer out. "You can come out now."

Realizing that you're talking about him, Jungkook springs up into a standing position with a little more force than necessary. The sudden gesture leaves him slightly winded and he almost tips over because of the sudden head rush, but he forces himself to keep his ground with the knowledge that if he said something or did the wrong thing then you would figure it all out. Although he has his doubts about your ability to see who he really was under the mask, given that the pair of you haven't exchanged enough conversations or spent enough time around one another to gain the knowledge about certain characteristics such as nervous gestures or a general idea towards the tone of each other’s voices, Jungkook stills finds himself worrying. He uses your momentary lapse of silence to think through his situation. How should he address you? Should he just whip off the mask and announce himself as Spiderman right before your very eyes? Should he keep the mask on and just play the role of the friendly neighborhood superhero? What if he mixed everything up? What if he kept the mask on, but stuttered and stammered so much at the very sight of you that you picked up on his identity immediately?

It’s always been easy to differentiate Jeon Jungkook from Spiderman, always easy to pretend like the mask was a way to actually hide away all the things that made Jungkook Jungkook—but things have never been easy when it came to you, which is ironic given that walking with you and being with you has always as easy as breathing. It’s a difficult sensation to describe.

His heart starts to pound quicker with the realization that his time to come up with a proper response to the issue at hand is gradually starting to dwindle. It’s hard to think and run through his options consistently, especially when you’re standing before him in nothing but an oversized t-shirt that’s about an inch above your thigh. The senses he had been gifted with are of no help, everything around him feeling like the intensity has been dialed to some double feature. It feels as if he’s hyperaware of everything now—from the breeze of the opened window to the movement of footsteps outside the hall to the overwhelming smell of lavender and he stiffens because you smelled like lavender—!

As it turns out, you end up being the one to find your voice first. “Holy shit,” You say by way of greeting, and Jungkook swears he can feel his head growing light from the sound of your voice. He’s pretty certain that you sound as if your vocal chords have been laced with strands of silky gold that float out every single time you open your mouth. “You’re Spiderman.”

He chokes on the next words, physically having to restrain himself from accidentally letting your name slip past his lips with the knowledge that that would bring on a whole other slew of questions. He covers the strangle in his throat with a cough, hoping that you would think he’s merely trying to clear his throat. “Y-Yes I am! Nice to meet you… here in your room.”

You follow the craning of his neck as his gaze flits over your wallpaper and your room. There is another bed next to the door and he briefly frets about your roommate but your next question does good work in ridding of that previous worry.

“Do you… attend school here?” You finally ask, incredulous voice and arms crossed over your chest and oh boy, oh boy, if you knew, if you knew.

Jungkook stands still under the facade, watching you just as intensely as you are watching him, and he wishes he could tell you everything right here but the timing of it all feels distant and awkward enough. If he could barely keep himself together with the mask on, who knows what kind of burning bridge he could create with the mask off.

“D-Don’t tell anyone,” He settles with disclosing, lowering his head slightly. “It’d be really helpful, and I would appreciate it.”

Lips still parted, you nod. “O-Of course.”

Seeing you in a momentary stump gives Jungkook the confidence to carry on with the conversation, finding it easy to not act like himself since you’re not acting like yourself either.

“Great, thanks,” Jungkook takes a few steps away from you to reach the open window. He extends his arms behind him to grip the edge of the ledge, deciding for a moment that he likes seeing you so taken aback at the sight of him—even if not for the reason he wants. “Sorry about the mix up, by the way.”

You’re still staring at him, and although your arms have lowered, your eyes are still widely fixed on him. “It’s okay,” You speak, voice barely just above a whisper.

Jungkook nods towards your walls. “I like your posters, by the way,” He remarks casually, gesturing to the giant photos of Captain America and you follow his head tilt as if you had completely forgotten you had Captain America posters in the first place. “Although I’m a more of an Iron Man fan myself.”

You whip your gaze back towards him. “Now wait a moment—!” You point out, but the rest of your words are swallowed back into your mouth when you turn your attention back to the window only to find that the space where Spiderman once stood is empty.

On the other side of the wall, Jungkook remains stuck to the outside right next to you window, heart stammering as he keeps his hands and feet firmly pressed against the plaster of the building. From his position, he doesn’t see the way your gaze lingers on the window, the way you look back at your Captain America posters, nor the way the corner of your lips turn up at the strange unexpected turn of your Tuesday evening.

.

(the past)

The first time you ever saw Jeon Jungkook, you are 15 years old, and he is getting shoved into the lockers right next to you.

It’s strange how well you hold this memory to your consciousness.

But it had been an unusual first-day-of-school, granted that you were moving in from a different town in the middle of the year and the experience is not unlike being thrown into the middle of a movie set where the movement and daily routine whirls around you and leaves you breathless and forced for adjustment. You had known before setting foot onto the campus that there was definitely going to be some catching up on your part, but you hadn’t known that you’d be encountering a bully attack right out of the gate.

So, naturally, you jump and make a little noise in the back of your throat as the contact of body meeting metal locker hits your ears. You tighten your grip on your books before it slips from your grasp as you immediately fix your gaze on the source of the noise. Standing next to you with his face scrunched in pain and teeth clenched together, the boy looks to be about your age, a tender 15-years-old, second year at this horror hell of educational means. Your eyes are quick to scan his appearance, gray jacket zipped up with the sleeves frayed from overuse. The hoodie he once wore over his head is knocked clean off the top, revealing a mop of unkempt black hair. He's got soft looking features across the paler complexion of his skin, and the sight makes your heartbeat quicken in your chest as a rush of sympathy and protective nature overcomes your nerves.

You long to open your mouth to say something, anything, but the rough voices behind you cut you off. "Watch where you're going Jeon; the morning excuses no one." The tone is rough and sharp, amused and cruel, before it's gone much too soon as if this type of activity is like clockwork and has been practiced on more than one occasion.

The thought isn't entirely comforting, which is probably what propels you to fix your gaze on the boy pressed against the locker. His eyes are still shut, and he's taking measured breaths. You notice almost immediately that no one lingers near him. No one stops to make sure he's doing okay, or that the shove hadn't caused permanent damage to his back, or if he can still manage a smile after this kind of morning. No one even makes eye contact with him as they rush past him with the excuse of making it to first period. The sight is practically heartbreaking as you watch students avoid the boy like he is the plague, no one desperate enough to catch his bad luck. He opens his eyes, casting them downwards, collecting his thoughts.

Still cradling the books in your hand, you shift in your standing position before attempting to reach an arm out towards the boy to ask if he's okay, but the boy flinches when he catches movement out of the corner of his eye. He fixes his gaze on yours for the very first time and his eyes are like the night sky, a shade of darkness that is surprisingly far from angry or frightened or moody. Instead, there is a loneliness that lingers like glimmers of a night sky, an emotion that you feel brewing in the pit of your own stomach—the idea that it’s possible to be surrounded by people every single day but still feel entirely and inescapably empty.

You don’t know a thing about him, and he doesn’t know a thing about you, but you find yourself gravitating towards him at once. You sympathize for him, but you also relate to his feelings and you wonder if he can see the concern flickering in your wide eyes once the initial shock of a rather unique morning greeting starts to fade away.

You, however, do not get to find out whether or not he’s noted of the emotions in your eyes. As soon as you try to open your mouth to say something, the boy is gone. He is a rush of blurred movements, pulling further and further away from you until he is darting away and not even sparing you a second glance. He leaves you alone, standing in the gradually emptying hallway, questions springing into your mind like wildflower, until the tardy bells rings and you curse. Nothing to start off the first day of a new school by being late.

You wish you could forget the boy as quickly as he could run away from you, run away from the bullies and the pain he’s probably hiding underneath that gray sweatshirt and eyes only you seem to be able to read, but life doesn’t work out in the way you wish it could. The earth continues to rotate, the day continues to pass by, the time continues to tick, and all of those things are like seeds of curiosity that plant themselves in your mind until you can physically feel it festering into a tree.

.

(the present)

The question of whether or not Jungkook would return the following night becomes a debate in it of itself as he spends a majority of the time leading up to the darkening sky pacing about in his dorm. His roommate has a tendency to let the day slip past his fingers wasting away in the library in desperate attempts to fill up his mind with Philosophical terms and conditional means—not that Jungkook minds the alone time. In fact, the constant absence of his roommate makes sneaking out all the more easier.

But sneaking out to chase trouble and sneaking out to see you, while both situations somewhat involve the same circumstances of Jungkook dressing into the suit and leaping through the opened window, feel different. Would using the Spiderman facade just to see you, and using the opportunity to have you see him not as Jeon Jungkook for once, be an abuse of power?

Maybe. Was that wrong, though? Was it wrong that he can’t get the mental image of you looking so taken by his physical appearance out of his head? Was it wrong to feel like the roles have reversed for once in his life and maybe catch a glimpse of what you saw every time he looked at you? Was it wrong that he finally had the covering he has always so desperately longed for that could help him look you in the eye for once in his life?

He thinks about feelings and validation, and starts out of his chair. He pulls the suit up and over his body, running a hand through his hair one last time before slipping on the mask, grabs the item resting upon his desk, and darting through the opened window. A web shoots out from the slinger, taking him across the way into the adjacent dorm building just a few feet away from his own. He rolls onto the rooftop, straightening and turning back around to face the structure he just escaped from. He stares through the windows, taking in the drawn curtains or the opened ones, the loud conversations and the ones he can’t hear at all.

Drawing only from his memory of yesterday, Jungkook fixes his gaze upon the general area he remembers lingering about in last night. Of course, his only real memory to draw from is the darkened area from the power outage, but maybe if he’s quiet and patient and the timing is right then maybe, just maybe—!

The answer presents itself to him within the next five seconds, when the flicker of movement from the window on the third floor, fourth from the edge, catches his attention and he narrows his eyes on the activity going on inside the room. In spite of the fact that everything he is currently doing is intentional, he can’t help the way his heartbeat quickens at the sight of you opening up the window of your dorm. Your hair falls forward like a curtain as you poke your head outside, as if you’re looking for something, before retreating back in.

The eleven o’clock hour finds you at your desk, as Jungkook watches you slip on your headphones and flip open the pages of a textbook along with opening your laptop. He finds himself tilting his head, curiosity blossoming in his features as he feels this desperate urge to know as much about you as humanly possible overcome him. The nerves grow in his chest at the thought of his arrival having a more negative, more distracting result, but the weight of the item in his hand brings him back.

Stealing away the hesitancy in his features, Jungkook leaps and shoots webbing just above your window, slipping in through and somehow managing a landing on his feet. The ruckus of his movement catches your attention as you jerk up in your seat and immediately pull the headphones out of your ear. “Spiderman?” You inquire incredulously.

He barely misses the way your lips quirk up at the sight of him, because he overshoots the sturdiness of his feet and accidentally tips forward enough to send him faceplanting onto the carpet of your dorm. “Hey—oh, shit!” He scrambles, but of course to no luck as he finds himself, once more, making a giant fool of himself in front of you.

As he tries to ready himself back up into a standing position, he fails to see the way your lips split out into a wider grin. “A-Are you alright?” You try kindly, reaching out for him, only to stop and bring your hands back down to your sides.

“Y-Yeah, of course. I’m great,” He brushes off, trying to keep his cool composure even though his cheeks feel like they’ve just been set aflame. “Thought I’d just drop by real quickly.”

‘Real quickly’. As if the thought of slipping into your room had been a spur of the moment idea, and not something that he has been losing his mind over for the past few hours.

You’re still staring at him, light smile dusting across your face, already looking more relaxed at the sight of his presence, as if you were expecting it, as if you were anticipating his return. “Any particular reason why?”

As soon as Jungkook has straightened up into a proper standing position, he notes the way you take a step closer and he hopes that the way he tenses up at the gesture goes by unnoticed. You’re so close that you have to look up at him through lashes, and he sees how big your eyes are, how many specks dance underneath the colors, and he’s fairly certain that he could get lost in the seemingly vast endlessness of the whole thing.

The way you quirk the corner of your lips leaves Jungkook to return to the fact that you had asked him a question and he coughs, knowing that the phrase ‘Because I was thinking about you’, while true, would probably not be appreciated and he did not want to make you uncomfortable with the knowledge that Spiderman was trying to flirt with you. Which, while may be the case, wasn’t something he was eager to drop on you right out of the fucking gate. As far as you knew, this was only your second encounter with Spiderman.

“Because,” Jungkook fills in after a moment. “I, well, I’ve brought something for you. An exchange of sorts.”

You raise an eyebrow. “An exchange?” You repeat. “I didn’t do anything wrong—you were the one who threw yourself on me—!”

“Alright, fine. Maybe the incident was my fault.” He finds himself smiling a little. “But I only want a small price from you—your name.”

You blink. “My name?”

He feels his lips quirking up into a wider smile. “Well, yes, don’t you have one?”

“Of course I do!” You retort, and he can’t help the laugh that escapes his lips, even though he already knows the answer to the question. “It’s Y/N.”

“See, was that so hard?” He finds himself teasing, heart racing when he catches your lips turning up as well. “Here’s my half of the exchange—an apology gift for scaring you yesterday.”

Suddenly, you laugh—that beautiful melody that makes him crack a smile of his very own. “It wasn’t that terrifying,” You brush off with a shrug. “And I was supposed to be getting up anyways for studying—so in a way, you actually helped out quite a bit.”

He doesn’t know what’s more satisfying: the fact that he’s not falling apart or the fact that you seem to be enjoying the conversation immediately. It’s probably part of your pleasant nature, sure, but he doesn’t feel that desire to say some practiced phrase before throwing himself off a cliff this time. “That’s reassuring to know,” He says, pulling the item from his side anyways. “Regardless, I’ve decided to bring you sometimes anyways.”

“That’s so sweet of you,” You gush, taking the gift from Jungkook. It appears to be a poster of some kind, rolled up into a cylinder shape, but you don’t comment as you unroll the paper. He can see the anticipation drawn heavily in your eyes, lips curled up as your gaze takes in the photo across.

It’s an Iron Man poster.

Your lips part slightly, darting your attention back over to him, already finding him taking a few steps back towards the window once more. “Now wait a minute—!” You retort.

“You’ll thank me later,” Jungkook interjects, raising two fingers towards his forehead to salute you off. “See you around Y/N,” He says, wondering and hoping that you could hear the grin in his tone, the promise in his words, the longing to see you again even before you’ve left his sight.

You’re still standing in the middle of the room, poster in hand, before you look up to smile at him. “See you around, Spiderman,” You return.

He sees your slightly timid wave before turning back around to face the window to hide his own embarrassment, as if the mask alone wasn’t enough to hide his own private smile. He wonders if you’ll hang up the Iron Man poster; but above all he wonders if you mean it.

.

(the past)

The sight of your second encounter with Jeon Jungkook, while it is so much more different than seeing him getting shoved into a locker, is equally as depressing. It’s enough to make you feel as if all hopes of attempting to rid your memories of the boy have gradually started to fade away.

The days since you’ve seen him—Jeon, they had called him, leaving you with a vague feeling that perhaps that was his last name—slowly start to turn into weeks that you can count with one hand. Your relatively quiet and knowledgeable disposition lands you a small group of friends after a success partnered chemistry lab, girls who keep to themselves just as you do. They give you a place to sit during lunch and invite you into their conversations, supplying backstories and names, sharing their childhood in exchange with yours. It’s the fastest group of friends you ever make, so your smile is one of genuine nature as you finally feel equipped to bring up a question that has been plaguing your mind since your very first day of school.

It’s a question you’re almost afraid to lead into the light until you see him taking a corner table at the far end of the cafeteria during lunchtime, the point furthest away from the crowds of other students. You watch carefully and openly, observing the way he takes nibbles of his sandwich and doesn’t look over his shoulder to see if anyone can see if he’s eating alone. Like he’s use to it.

“Who’s that boy over there?” You find yourself asking before you could think about the gravity of your question. “I saw him on my first day getting shoved into the lockers.”

Karly barely spares a glance at the direction you are gesturing towards. “Oh, that’s Jeon Jungkook,” She answers quietly. “He’s been a target of the bullying since freshman year.”

“Why?” You ask, only tearing your gaze away from Jungkook when Karly tugs hard at the sleeve of your sweater.

“The other boys say he’s too weird, or too smart, or too different…” Karly explains. “Don’t stare for too long, he’ll drag you down.”

Drag you down? You throw Karly an incredulous look at how she uses too much practiced ease to describe Jungkook as an offensive weight rather than an actual human being. Something about the way she says the statement doesn't sit entirely well with you, but the finality in her tone keeps you from saying anything more on the subject.

.

(the present)

True to the unspoken pact conveyed through words, longing glances, and shy smiles, Jungkook elects to return back the following night without an ounce of hesitation. The desperation to see you is something that he can feel throughout all his nerves, making everything inside of him shake and curl with anticipation. He makes his way to the college, to the dorms, to you, all with a smile tugging broadly at his features.

He brings Thai food that night with the excuse that he merely needed to continue with the apology gifts in the form of food, to which you excitedly exclaimed that you were desperately in need of a pick-me-up at the eleven o’clock hour. His lips quirk up when he sees the Iron Man Poster hanging over your desk, but he doesn’t bring it up and neither do you.

His active participation in your life starts to become a regular occurrence. Always at the same eleven o’clock hour, always accompanied with a gift of some kind, always provided forth with the same excuse of the little exchange game Jungkook has come up with. Always a present as a reward to hear about your day: from the bad to the good and the little small moments in between. Even though he has a full day of classes and studying (or, okay, perhaps not that much studying) much like you, it’s always interesting to hear about a life not threatened by the abnormality of outside robberies or attacks or having to listen to the news constantly or living practically every single day of a life to ensure that he could protect another.

He wants to hear about a day that’s, essentially, normal and untouched by the terrors of horrible people. You provide that reassurance, that comfort, by never asking too much or too little of him. By having his mask on, he gets to see you with yours off—and there is a freeness to your laughs and your smiles, your interesting stories and your ability to always see the positives in every situation. You indulge in your insecurities and it’s in those little moments where he’s Spiderman, but he’s never felt more closer to who he really is. He likes hearing about your classes, about your asshole of a math professor, or the roommate who rarely shows up because of her boyfriend.

“Do you have a totem?” You ask one particular evening, picking up a piece of orange chicken from the Panda Express takeout he had run by before coming over to see you. He’s also come to find that you’ll pretty much eat anything and your dislike of food is quite limited—again, it’s like another piece of the puzzle he has learned to take full advantage of in getting to know you better.

Jungkook stills momentarily. “Ah, what do you mean?”

“I mean,” You start, shifting a little and tugging down on your sweater before it could ride too far up your side. “You put yourself in a lot of danger, right? Sometimes, aren’t you ever afraid?”

He doesn’t say anything to the question. He stares down at the chow mein on your plate. “I-I don’t know,” He lies, because of course he’s been afraid. Who wouldn’t be afraid of the fear that one day, all the sneaking around and the hidden traces of his identity would be for nothing? Who wouldn’t be afraid of the thought that someone would find him and hurt not just him but everyone in his life who he loved and who he held dear to? He doesn’t speak of the nightmares that plague his dreams, the nights where he wakes up in a cold sweat because he hadn’t been careful enough. “I’ve, uh, never really thought of that before.”

You hum, studying him closely and Jungkook can feel himself shifting underneath your attention. How was it that you more often than not had these looks that made him feel that he was without the suit and you could see every raw emotion that danced behind his eyes? “Well, let’s just say that you were afraid,” You reply. “Is there anyone you could think of that could ground you? Or, at least, remind you that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel?”

Light at the end of the tunnel. The last part of your question stirs something inside of Jungkook, who knows the answer to it before processing it in his mind. His mind whirls back three years to that fated encounter in the hallway and the many different instances that followed, the first genuine smile of understanding and not of sympathy he ever got, the only person who made him realize that perhaps he could get through the remaining years of that hellhole called high school.

“Y-Yeah…” He replies rather breathlessly, keeping his eye on you as you lean over to grab another orange chicken. “There’s someone that I have in mind.”

“Aw,” You coo, adjusting your position on the ground, continuing to give him all your attention. “What’s this person like? A family member? A friend?”

“Oh n-no,” He stammers, turning his head to the side to scratch the back of his neck. “It’s this girl that I knew. From high school.”

Your eyes light up. “Oh, well, a crush, huh? Who knew the infamous Spiderman has a soft spot? What’s she like? Do you bombard her with posters of Iron Man as well?”

He laughs tightly at that, because if only you knew, if only you knew. “I-I do, but I doubt she knows that I exist. But she’s—wow. She’s amazing. She’s been through a lot with me and I just, I just wished she knew how much she meant to me. I would do anything for her.”

He sneaks a look back at you, heart stuttering when he sees the glimmer of admiration in his eyes, as if the thought of him finding happiness in the simplest things and the most seemingly insignificant of moments and people made you happy and holy shit. This is it. This is why he’s been in love with you for three years, this is why he’s had and will always have a soft spot for you. “It sounds like you’re really fond of her. Well,” You add, a hint of grand finality in your tone as you take the last orange chicken and grin at his whine of protest. “I hope you’ll get the courage to tell her one day. You should definitely go all We Bought A Zoo on her.”

“We Bought A Zoo?” He repeats, furrowing his eyebrows as he watches you take that last lovely piece of orange chicken.

“Yeah,” You exclaim. “You know, that line.” You swallow, gaping slightly at his blank look. “That line! ‘Sometimes all you need is just twenty seconds of insane courage’. That should be your motto.”

You finish up your chow mein, too preoccupied with the sudden consumption of your food to notice his own dazed disposition. He rolls the quote in his mind. Twenty seconds. It didn’t sound too hard in theory. It could take twenty seconds to pull the mask off, twenty seconds to spill his guts and his love for you, twenty seconds to say it all.

Or, twenty seconds to rip the mask off, kiss your cheek, and throw himself out of the window; never to be seen again.

“I’ll consider it.” That’s all he settles with disclosing, watching as you hum around your bottled water.

.

(the past)

The third time you see Jeon Jungkook, it's the end of the day and the sound of a body making contact with the ground snaps you out of your resolve as you whip around to see the boy who has been occupying your thoughts for the past few days on the ground. His books and paperwork are scattered about and he suddenly looks smaller than he did getting shoved into a locker or sitting by himself in a sea full of people. The same group of boys from before are towering over Jungkook, equal smirks and snarls across ugly faces as a notebook is kicked away from the boy's grasp. It slides across the floor, hitting the heel of your shoe as you linger near your locker, trying to blend in yet make your feet move at the same time, Karly's previous warning in your mind be damned.

The warnings that leave lips go by completely unheard of by you as you find that the only thing you can focus on is Jungkook and his crumpled figure on the school floor, not moving an inch in or out of place as the boys give each other one last side glance before heading off in the opposite direction. Given that it's the end of another school day, the hallways are completely devoid of students, with the exception of you and Jungkook now. You watch him, and you don't know if he's watching you, but he definitely makes a point not to look up at you as he pushing himself up so he could sit on his knees. He starts reaching out, grabbing for his fallen books and pencils and notebooks, reminding you that one of his own spiral bound journals is near your feet.

You settle with not closing your locker, afraid that the noise of the slamming metal would disturb the unusual peacefulness that has settled between the pair of you, bending down instead to gather the notebook in your arms. The boy is just finishing up his collecting before you kneel down next to him. "Uh, I believe this is yours," You say by way of greeting, cursing the situation at once because out of all the things you could have possibly said in the English dictionary, you just had to say that. Of course the notebook was his, how could it not be after someone thought to kick it out of Jungkook's grasp as he was reaching for it.

You wish you had given yourself a second just to mentally prepare what to say before opening your mouth, if only to make the first words you ever said to this boy to be ones of comfort or reassurance and not ones of obvious means.

Jungkook swallows thickly, flickering his gaze up to you and you see it again: the isolation and loneliness and these different emotions each taking up a glimmer in his dark eyes. There is more of a hopelessness this time that you can read as clear as a book, and you wonder if anyone has ever been close enough to Jungkook physically to see this type of activity. Even more, if anyone has seen his eyes the way you see it and has actually tried to do something about it.

Given that he's still here, alone, probably as he's always been, does not do reassuring things to your stomach.

"Thanks," Jungkook says stiffly, voice low and somewhat cracked from underuse as he takes the notebook without even trying to meet your gaze.

"I-I'm sorry you have to go through this," You say quickly before your mind could stop the words from escaping, not missing the way he visibly stiffens at your apology.

"You don't have to apologize," Jungkook grumbles, tucking the notebook you had given him underneath his arm. "You aren't doing anything wrong."

"I..." You start again, trailing off when the words fail you. For someone with too much to say, there seems to be only silence greeting you on the other side as there are so many things you long to say to Jungkook. But your shyness, your hesitance, your fear of disclosing too much and frightening him, or saying too much only to be met with even more quiet, keeps your throat closed. "No one deserves to go through what you're going through," You mumble instead, actually unsure if Jungkook can hear you or not.

With the way he suddenly turns his head to look at you, you can only assume that he has. Bravely, you lift your head up to meet his gaze, if only to take in that endless shade of darkness with a flickering of light that shimmers like a speck behind his eyes. You keep your eyes on him, even as his eyes roam across your face, clearly trying to gauge your expression for signs of sarcasm or amusement. You wonder if he's worried a group of people will come out with cameras, only to be told that the event going on before him had been nothing more than a means for a horrible, horrible prank. But you keep your silence, you keep your eyes on him to show off your genuine intentions.

Jungkook looks away suddenly, not quite sure how to hold himself in the face of you. You are, essentially, a stranger, yet you're here and you've somehow managed to say the right thing at the right time. He wonders if it would be appropriate to disclose how he recognized you immediately after he almost crashed into you that faithful morning at the lockers. Or, if it would be socially acceptable to blurt out how looking at you made him feel seen for the first time in his entire life.

But he doesn't say anything, and neither do you, as Jungkook straightens up and you quickly follow suit. The pair of you continue with your silence, unsure whether or not to break it, unsure if he should thank you for helping you out, or if you should continue supplying some kind of reassurance to the boy. For some reason, all those things feel excessive and unnecessary; which is why Jungkook leaves you by your locker with a sort of quiet understanding of one another. It's not a bad place to walk away from.

.

(the present)

Jungkook is no stranger to the white hot agony of physical pain, he’s definitely had his fair share of attacks that don’t always swing his way or enemies that have a lot more backup or quick wit or strength than Jungkook has. This is not new to him. In fact, the boy is actually quite use to returning back from his nightly adventures with bruises along his side or cuts along his face that take more than a few weeks to heal. He’s partially glad that his roommate nor do any peers bother to ask questions about his whereabouts or how he’s acquired certain scars in the first place—and it’s not like there’s anyone around him seeing him without a shirt on or anything of the sort. It helps with keeping his life private.

But this, this is new.

And by this, it means a knife wound right in his side, one that’s much too deep to rely on the healing abilities of his own body that makes every single step and every single flex of his body feel like someone is driving a metal fist right into his gut. A knife wound in the side, a slice along his cheek.

“Fucking shit,” He grunts, staggering out of the alleyway, gripping his side that’s warm and wet with blood—his blood and maybe some of the other guy’s too—but it doesn’t matter because there is pain and there is pain everywhere and he can practically taste it in his mouth and it’s like bile in the pit of his stomach. A part of him wants to roll onto the dirty sidewalk of the city, let the breeze take him away, but he can’t. He has something to return to, he has someone who’s waiting for him.

After a few moments of limping, he leans against a wall and pulls his hand away from the wound, only to be greeted with that burning torment of having a wound that deep so exposed. Immediately, he brings his wrist up and tugs at the fabric, exposing a watch.

12:03AM.

“Fuck,” He curses again, leaning against the wall, gritting his teeth, bringing a hand to his wound that now showed no signs of slowed bleeding. It was serious. He needed to go to a doctor.

He stills in his movement. No. He couldn’t do that.

He can’t even begin to lay out all the risks that come with going to the hospital. Doctors, as professional and careful and effortless they may seemed, asked question. Doctors required personal information. Jungkook didn’t trust doctors. He couldn’t.

He always thought that taking up the role of that friendly neighborhood Spiderman would keep people out of danger. And while it has, he’s put his own life at risk, threatened to bleed to death on the very ground he stood on.

He couldn’t go back home—his parents would have a fit and he wouldn’t survive the drive home.

He couldn’t ask his roommate—the boy would likely sell him out to Kim Namjoon and the whole school would likely find out. He couldn’t text his group from that one science project that one semester.

The boy furrows his eyebrows, but then it stops. His eyes widen.

He did have someone he could ask. He did have someone he could trust—someone he trusted more than was probably appropriate. But trust he did, and that was the best option he had so far. He had no choice. This was the only option.

After all, twenty seconds was all he needed to make up his mind, right?

.

(the past)

The fourth time you see Jungkook is marked by an aisle of novels and books, silence, and seeing him hunched over in the manga section of the school library. The sight makes you smile, as you are momentarily glad that you had dismissed yourself early from the cafeteria with the excuse that you really needed to check out a particular novel for an upcoming English assignment.

You find him so intensely immersed in his story that you almost feel guilty for breaking him out of his trance. But your need to say something to him is the driver of that last minute reflexive action as you take a step towards him. "Hi," You whisper once you're sure you're within earshot of the boy.

He jerks up at the noise so close to him, nearly dropping his book at the shock of your abrupt visit into his consciousness and you stare at him for a moment before he gives you a quick side glance and seems to deem your presence acceptance. "Uh, hey..." He returns, closing the book and reaching up to rub the back of his neck. "What, uh, what are you doing here?"

You hold up your required novel. "I have to read The Great Gatsby for an extra credit assignment."

He nods slowly, cheeks looking as if they've been set aflame and you wonder if this is the longest conversation he's ever had with another person.

You take in a breath, steering yourself for the alternative routes of direction your new conversation starter could lead to. "How are you feeling? After what happened the other day?"

The other day is something that Jungkook already seems to understand, and although he doesn't look entirely too keen on brushing upon that particular topic, he does look relieved that the responsibility of keeping silence comfortable is no longer something he has to worry about. "I'm okay," He says with the shrug of his shoulders, and you study him closely, having already partially expected him to come up with that sort of answer. “T-Thank you for helping me with that. I don’t think I, uh, got to tell you that.”

You smile a little. "Of course. Like I said, it's not fair what people are trying to put you through." You look at your novel for a moment, before casting another look in his direction. "I'm Y/N, by the way."

Your smile is meant to be one of comfort and reassurance, but it seems to only make him more nervous. "Jungkook," He stammers out, looking over at you through his lashes and the sight is so strangely endearing that you can't help but muster a laugh.

"Well, it's nice to officially meet you, Jungkook," You say, unable to help yourself from speaking his name. It sounds nice on your tongue, a rolling effect, a slightly pouting of your lips. "I hope we'll see more of each other soon."

"M-Me too," He returns, casting another look at you whist reaching up to run a hand lightly through the locks of his hair. You're immediately set on noting that this is gesture Jungkook does when he's nervous and you wonder if you'll ever get the complete puzzle set that is Jungkook.

The pair of you bid each other goodbye with one last shy smile, one last shy wave, before you're turning on your heel and down the aisles. You miss the way Jungkook's eyes seem to follow your departing figure as it grows smaller and smaller the further away you move. Just before you reach the end of the aisle, Jungkook looks back down at the text, fixing his attention back down on the drawings of titans and a certain Eren Jaeger flinging his way to safety.

You do not turn the corner immediately upon reaching the end of the aisle. You stall, lingering in your movement for a moment, before risking one last look over your shoulders. You watch Jungkook, watch the way his lips curl up at the corners as the images on the page before him seem to jump out. You wonder what kind of story he's reading, what kind of pictures draw themselves out in his mind, if he's as brilliant as everyone claims him to be, and you wonder why how someone so calm could call in such a storm.

Your high school experience with Jungkook is categorized in this manner: stepping forward and reaching out, shy glances in the hallways when neither of you think the other is paying attention, shy smiles in the hallways as your gaze pierces Jungkook's from across the span of distance usually always placed between the pair of you and he lets his heart race at how completely tangible he feels when under your gaze.

.

(the present)

Jungkook never imagined that crawling up a wall would turn into such a struggle, since he's always managed to perform the task as easy as breathing or walking. But, then again, he didn't have a knife wound in the side during those previous times. It feels like needles are pulsing underneath his skin with every movement he takes, every inch he's crawling upwards towards your dorm. The window is opened, but it's the fear that you'll close it and close him out of your life that keeps him propelling forward.

Each reach up, each inch upwards evokes a gritting of teeth and a grunt of pain along every fiber of his nerves that makes everything feel like his body has been set on fire. He doesn't know if he'll make it, because the third floor is almost the same painful and longing sensation as scaling a fucking skyscraper and it's not enough. The bonding movement of his hands to the walls don't feel like enough, his strength doesn't feel like enough, and it feels like he's going to die; he's going to die right here and fall to his death and he's never going to do it. He's never going to tell you how he feels about you, he's never going to kiss your cheek, or use his twenty seconds of insane courage.

Somehow, someway, through the force of his sheer willpower, he crawls in through the opened window and practically falls to the ground.

"You're late!" There it is, that beautiful voice, something that seems to momentarily blind him from the pain and the fact that he's going to be bleeding all over your carpet very soon. "I thought you said you were bringing over Star Wars tonight for our exchange. I was really looking forward to telling you about this really awful thing my History professor said to one of the students today..."

He coughs instead, the weight of the pain making his head spin and holy shit, he's never felt anything like this before. He might pass out if he's not careful, if he lets the pain cloud his vision and his judgment.

"S-Spiderman?" You inquire, voice considerably softer and filled to the brim with concern as he feels a presence kneeling down beside him, a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Are you alright—!" You cut yourself off as soon as Jungkook rolls over to expose all the cuts that decorate his suit. "Oh my god," You whisper.

Jungkook peels open an eye, taking in your panicked expression, gaze wide with worry, and he tries to speak up. "It's... only a scratch," He manages.

You scoff, unable to believe he's trying to mask his pain with layers of humorless amusement. "Doesn't look like a scratch," You protest. "Oh my god. Can, uh, can you sit up for me?" You move closer to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and allowing him to lean on you as you do your best to pull him up into a sitting position. "How bad are the wounds?"

"I think it'll need stitches," He grumbles. "S-Sorry, I didn't mean to drop by like this..."

"Don't apologize," You reassure. "You're lucky, I just finished a first aid class on the campus. Except, I don't know how well I'll be with a needle..."

"It's okay," He cuts in, breathing shallow. "I trust you."

There is a silence that hangs in the air, one that you are quick to break with a noise of understanding that sounds from the back of your throat. "Okay, I'm going to take you to my bed now, so I'm gonna need you to stand up..."

A nod of understanding, another grunt as Jungkook grits his teeth, bites his lip, does anything to keep himself quiet and not worry you even more than he already has. He finds himself leaning heavily on you, the pain making his head spin as he grips onto you with a little more force than necessary. You do not seem to mind, letting him hold you like this as he rests himself down on your mattress.

You disappear for a moment, reappearing from your closet with a first aid kit. Your eyes narrow, taking in the torn fabric of his uniform. You bite your lip suddenly, as if struck by an idea that makes you nervous. "S-Sorry Spiderman. I hate to say this to you but, um, the suit as got to go. I won't be able to reach your wounds otherwise..."

"N-No, it's okay," Jungkook manages, the reality of the situation sinking in at about the same time the words leave his mouth. He really did not think this through, did not think about how those twenty seconds of insane courage he had saving up on would strike him when he least expected it. He should have known that of course he would have to reveal his identity to you someday; just not under these unusual circumstances and not when he's grappling with the pain that feels like needles in his temple now. "I understand."

"I can look away if you want," You offer kindly, but Jungkook just grits his teeth again, shakes his head.

"It’s fine,” Jungkook cuts in. “D-Do you mind helping me with the mask though?”

You swallow, probably knowing the direction this was taking much like him. “Of course.” You slowly place the first aid kit onto the desk next to your bed. You take a step towards him, and he finds himself naturally parting his legs for you to move between them. The close proximity makes both of you very much aware of the natural body warmth both of you seem to be emitting off.

The silence feels tense and suffocating, and Jungkook knows that his time is running out. Although he's not sure he's ready for you to see him for what he is beyond the mask, he remembers your talk about twenty seconds of courage and knows that this is the right thing to do. And he means what he said to you. He trusts you.

"Um," You start hesitantly. "Can I...?" You're gesturing to his mask.

"Y-Yeah," He stammers back, holding his breath as you gently grip the edge of the mask right at the base of his neck. He keeps his gaze locked on you, as you do with him, before you tug off the mask in one swift movement.

He watches you very carefully for your reaction, honestly expecting a look of betrayal for the fact that Jeon Jungkook has been Spiderman this entire time, or maybe even something of hurt, but he doesn't get that look of anger flashing behind eyes or anything else of the sort. He sees something flickering in your eyes, recognition and something else: something deeper and fonder, before that concern comes back with the full force of a train. "Jungkook?" You whisper, his name on your lips like his favorite melody. You haven't stepped away from him, haven't tried to build that wall, instead taking that second of silence to scan his face. Your eyes roam across every inch, from his nose to the cuts along his cheek, to his lips, to his eyes.

He tries for a weak smile. "H-Hi Y/N," He whispers back. His hands twitch, desperately longing to place them on your waist, if only to generate some sort of reaction to the big reveal. But it's at that moment that the pain at his side returns as he hisses between his teeth.

This is enough to startle you out of your previous resolve as you jump slightly and look down. "Do you think you can take the suit off for me?" You inquire quietly. "I-I know it might be difficult I just, I don't want to hurt you anywhere..."

The fact that there is no drastic change in your attention or attitude, even with knowing the truth of his identity, helps Jungkook relax slightly under your care. He manages a nod, and gets to work attempting to peel the suit off his upper body. It's hell trying to get his arms out, and even harder trying to tug the material down his body, but he tries to remain careful as he shifts and rolls his body until the suit is bunched at his waist.

You turn your attention back to him, and he watches the way your eyes trace down, outlining the muscles along his figure, from his arms to his collarbone, down to his chest and finally to the increasingly obvious wound at his side. You start forward, instructing Jungkook to lay on his side as you ready the materials out on your desk. “Have you ever gotten a wound stitched?” You inquire.

He shakes his head. “Just do it,” He manages, gaze roaming across the room and realizing that he should probably try to focus his attention on something. Eventually, he settles on your face. He takes in the furrowed eyebrows and the eyes that study his wound. He grits his teeth, trying to remind himself that he is here and he is alive and he trusts you and your intentions on not hurting him too much, even after you start. There are little pinches of pain, some parts worst than others, but the sight of you here, not running away, is enough to keep Jungkook’s nerves and anxiety on the low. “Are you surprised?” He finds himself asking after a few beats of long silence that take on neither a comfortable or an uncomfortable sensation.

You’re quiet for a moment, clearly trying to decide how to go about his question. “I probably shouldn’t have been,” You finally settle on disclosing. “In hindsight, it should have been obvious. Only you would do something so selfless for the sake of other people.”

He stills at that, turning his attention up to the ceiling of your room, so caught up in your words that he doesn’t notice that you’ve finished healing up his wound until you’re wrapping it up.

“Okay, your side is done,” You say, placing the needle in the alcohol to clean it off. “Can you sit up for me? I want to take care of the cut on your cheek.”

Jungkook does what he is asked, gingerly pushing himself up to resume his position of sitting up on the edge of your mattress. Legs open, you step between them. His gaze continues to follow you as you bring a cloth to his face to start gently dabbing at the cut. It stings, but he keeps his mouth shut, and you can probably see the pain flaring up in his eyes like fireworks. He watches you the whole time, eyes big and adoring and careful all at once, that it’s almost necessary that he has to say the next words. “I’m sorry,” He whispers.

You pause. “For what?”

It’s almost amusing how quiet the pair of you are. It’s the weekend, the halls are probably deserted and your roommate had already given you the heads up that she would be spending all of her time in her boyfriend’s apartment so it’s not like anyone would come bursting in or threatening to break the air that has settled between the pair of you. But it’s like this moment is private, intimate, as Jungkook reveals a part of his life he’s kept hidden in the shadows for two and a half years and you, perhaps his biggest secret of all, telling him that it’s okay.

“For not telling you earlier,” He answers. You shift your gaze from the cut on his cheek to his eyes and the pair of you are so close that he’s fairly confident that you can hear his heartbeat. “I wanted to, it’s just…”

“I know,” You cut in gently and he breathes out, because that air of understanding that had developed in high school has only remained the longer the pair of you look at each other. He wonders if you can read his eyes just as he can, he wonders if you can see the overwhelming amount of affection that curls at his heart, the way he can’t stop flickering his gaze down to your lips, the way he’s practically shaking at the close proximity. “That question about the totem from the other day,” You bring up after a moment, lifting your hand up to cup his cheek, thumb lightly dusting over his skin in a gesture that seems almost mindless but Jungkook doesn’t care. “Who were you talking about?”

But she’s—wow. She’s amazing. She’s been through a lot with me and I just, I just wished she knew how much she meant to me. I would do anything for her. The words that Jungkook had spoken about aforementioned totem come barreling back to him. “I thought it was obvious,” He says, light humor and he averts his gaze. “I was talking about you.”

He turns his attention back to you, heart ramming in his throat, laying everything down on the line. He watches your unreadable expression carefully, before you flit your gaze and you’re staring right back at him. He sees the memories that unfold behind your eyes like flashes of a movie, from the very first time you saw him in the hallway, then the library, and every little moment afterwards that made him feel cared for and watched over.

Without a warning, your grip on his face tightens just the slightest to pull him upwards as you lean forward to deliver a chaste kiss against his mouth. Actually, it should hardly constitute for a kiss. It’s just a brushing of the lips, but it’s enough to send a shiver of electricity through Jungkook’s whole body. It’s like he’s being brought back to life, all the reflexive power returning back to his limbs. Just before you could pull back, he reaches up to grip your waist, pushing you against him so he could crush his lips back to yours. Your lips are just as soft and warm as he’s always pictured it to be, and the sensation of that on top of you lightly tracing patterns along his jawline makes him moan.

You pull away after a moment to catch your breath, but Jungkook keeps your body pressed to yours, hands tight on your waist, overtaken by the desire to plant kisses along your neck. “Jungkook,” You whisper breathlessly, trailing off, tilting your head to the side and getting lost in the sensation of his lips tracing across your skin. “Y-You’re hurt, maybe we shouldn’t—!” You start, already getting an idea for the direction this was heading, if the burning fire starting in the pit of your stomach or the hardness pressing against your stomach is an indication to go by.

“I don’t care,” Jungkook interrupts, hands traveling up to cup your face. “I’ve waited so long for this.” He brings you forward to kiss him again, and you melt underneath his touch, the tenderness you’ve always felt for him coming back to hit you with the full force of a bullet train. You can taste the sweetness on his lips, the softness and the love he holds for you in his touches, which are soft in contradiction to the frantic desperation of his lips.

Although you’re still hesitant about his injuries, Jungkook gives you little choice to dwell on the manner because soon, he’s scooting higher up onto your bed and bringing his hands back down to your waist to attempt to bring you up too. As soon as he settles back down, head on your pillow and body lying completely flat on the bed, does he pull you forward in to straddle his waist. You lean forward, planting both hands on either side of his head to ensure not putting all your weight onto his wounds before kissing him again. He kisses back urgently, angling his head, using a hand to curl around the back of your neck. You emit soft noises from the back of your throat as he continues dragging out your moans.

You’re close, but you’re suddenly not close enough, and he can’t seem to feel enough of you. Your warmth floats from your body, curling around him and blinding his senses to everything but you. He whimpers, using the hand still at your waist to push you against his body and you melt, you fold into his touches and his physical commands—!

Your knee accidentally nudges the wound at his side; a soft tap that feels intensified by a sharp spike of pain. There’s a gasp as Jungkook pulls away, the waves of pain momentarily electrifying a part of his brain that distracts him from the current subject at hand.

You pull away at once. “Are you okay?” You inquire immediately. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, did I hurt you—?”

It feels as if Jungkook is getting sagged back to reality and the question generates a violent shake of his head. “No, no,” He whines, opening his eyes when you cup his cheek with one of his hands, shaking his head again at the concern that floods his features. “I’m okay, just keep kissing me, please.”

He cranes his neck back up to kiss you again, swallowing your protests until you’re too caught up to continue speaking. You yield to him once more, and Jungkook desperately tugging up your sleeping shirt to feel along the hot skin of your waist. It feels like his mind is trying to roll through honey, still quite unable to believe that you’re here, on his lap, kissing him back. He chokes on a moan when you start rolling your hips against his, the additional friction making the blood rush straight down between his legs.

“Y/N,” He stammers, a panting mess as you pull away and immediately start dusting kisses along his jawline, down his neck, below his ear. He’s already a mess, he’s already too sensitive for this onslaught of emotions to his system. Both his hands have now found their way to your waist, holding onto you much too tightly, if only to keep him grounded when it feels like all he wants to do is spin out of control. “I haven’t… I’ve never done this before…” He finds himself confessing in a breath, letting it float in the around the pair of you.

He feels you smile against his neck. “It’s okay.” You shift slightly. “Just relax Jungkook,” You whisper against the shell of his ear, sending vibrations up his spine. “Let me take care of you.”

Suddenly, you push yourself up into a sitting position and tug off your night shirt. Jungkook’s eyes widen, jaw slacking when he realizes that you aren’t wearing a bra underneath. “Holy shit…” He whispers, drawing patterns along your skin as his gaze continues to stare unblinkingly at your exposed upper figure, as if he’s afraid that this is a dream, as if he’s afraid this would all fade away if he didn’t appreciate every second of this moment the way he should have. “You’re so beautiful—mm.” His voice fade away to a moan as you slowly start to rock your hips against his once more, applying pressure over his erection. Even with the cloth of his suit and boxers, it’s like he can feel everything and he whimpers. He cranes his head back, baring his neck towards you, hands curling tighter around your waist. Relying purely on instinct, he finds himself meeting your grinding movements in a way that leaves you breathless.

"You're not so bad yourself," You manage fervently, leaning forward to press your palms against his shoulders in order to steady yourself. The foundation of having something sturdy underneath your touch allows you to press harder, teasing your core over his length.

Jungkook lifts his head up, eyebrows furrowed, cheeks flushed, eyes glazed over, gaze narrowing at the movement of your hips against his. The sight of seeing him so wrecked because you is enough to make the desire pulse through you as you speed up the pace of your rolls.

Sucking in a breath between gritted teeth, Jungkook's head falls back against the pillows. "Y/N," He whines, high pitched and filled with so much need that it makes your head spin. "Y/N, I... I need..."

"What do you need, Jungkook?" You coax, trying to keep your mind together enough to ask him a question. "Tell me what you need."

The flush that dusts his cheeks merely deepens at the gentle request to spell out what exactly he wanted you to do to him. He's never been too eloquent with words, so he stammers. It doesn't help that you continue rolling your hips against his clothed cock, the additional fabric adding to the friction that only seems to dip his mind further into ecstasy. He opens his mouth, closes it again, swallows thickly when you lean down to kiss his cheek, his upper lip, the gesture surprisingly chaste for the hell you're putting him through down below.

You giggle lightly, smiling against his cheek, taking pride and amusement at your ability to render him completely speechless. "Do you want me to take the suit off?"

He nods quickly, thankful that you could not only detect his clear struggle, but also filling in his voice with your own. "Y-Yeah."

You pull back, flashing another reassuring smile as you move down his body just enough, tugging at the suit that has collected at his waist and pulling it down his legs. You only make it down to his ankles before he's pulling you back and using his own feet to rid of the rest of his suit and boxers. He kisses you harder, the excitement and the nervousness and the anticipation of what would follow making his hands shake, as they settle on the waistband of your sleeping shorts. He attempts to tug down once, twice, but he can't seem to get the direction right and you're laughing against his mouth.

"Don't laugh," He whines, tugging on your bottom attire once more time. "Take this off, Y/N."

"You're so assertive Jeon," You tease lightly, but you pull back enough for him to see your own glazed expression. Keeping your eyes on him, you tug down the last remaining articles of clothing separating the pair of you. The shifting in the bed signals the kicking up of your legs to rid of the shorts and panties entirely. Both of you refuse to break eye contact the entire time until finally, you break it to look down to take in the sight of his length, hard and needy with the tip spilling over with precum and the sight is so mouthwatering that a part of you longs to just slide down Jungkook's body to score a taste, to see if perhaps he tastes as sweet as his tongue does.

But the sound of his voice breaks you out of your previous resolve, his hands moving up and down your side to get your attention. "Should we, uh," He starts, clearly embarrassed and nervous and hesitant at the sight of being exposed to one another. "Do we, well, do you have a... um..."

Your face breaks out into another fond smile. You lean down to kiss reassurance onto his lips. "I'm on the pill," You report. "Are you sure about this Jungkook?"

He watches you carefully for a long second, that previous lust and haze in his eyes dissipating for just a moment and being replaced with something more steady, something more confident, something more loving. "I've never been more sure about anything in my life."

Your heart stutters in your chest for just a moment at his trust, at his hope, in you, and in what the pair of you could become. You sit up, lifting yourself up by the knees and gently taking him to rub him over your slit. Jungkook reacts immediately to this by sucking in a breath, and you hardly give him time to think or process or overcome the sensation before you're lining the tip to your entrance and sinking onto him. The stretch is overwhelming that you throw your head back into a whimper, eyebrows furrowing, as Jungkook is emitting something drawn between a desperate whine and a sigh of finally getting to feel you around him.

"Y/N," He chokes out, hands settling back at your waist as soon as you've gone hilt deep, fingers digging into the skin with more force than before, leaving you little doubt that there would be bruising within the next few days. But you don't care, and he doesn't care. Your hands find refuge on his shoulders once more, gripping tightly, finding foundational comfort in the touch, as you use that base to help you rise up his length slowly before sliding down his cock. "O-Oh fuck," Jungkook moans, arching his back at the sensation, just as you're whimpering out his name. "Oh fuck Y/N, do that again. Do that again please."

You're too caught up to reply, so you merely settle with repeating the movement until you've developed a pace that has the both of you whining and groaning in timing to the rhythm. Once Jungkook starts to gain a sense of the tempo of your hips, he acquires half a mind to start returning the thrusts.

"Mm, Jungkook," You whine, driving yourself faster down his length. "Just like that, ah!" You crane your neck up slightly in response to the overwhelming pleasure that floods your system right when Jungkook hits the spot that makes you sees stars. Feeling your release just right there, you bring one hand up to rub at your clit, the sensation making you dub over and Jungkook watches the sight of you adding additional pleasure to yourself with deep interest.

"Y/N," He groans out, trying to focus on helping you reach your end first before he could blow his load right then and there. It vaguely surprises him with just how long he's been able to last up until this point, but he's not going to survive much longer, as he feels himself beginning to get dragged towards the edge at an alarmingly quicker pace. "L-Let me."

You open an eye to peer down in time to see him brushing away your fingers from your clit, immediately replacing them with his thumb. As soon as he touches the bundle of nerves, you tense up, your lips parting slightly as the ecstasy you feel goes beyond the vocal capability. "Yes Jungkook," You whine. "Right there, right there, right there, oh god, I'm gonna—!"  Your eyes shut tightly together as your lips part in a silent scream as the white hot pleasure courses through your system and light a fire to every single one of your nerves.Your hips slow down. Your legs tremble on either side of him before the high of your release fades away and is gradually replaced with overstimulation. With a high pitched whimper of protest of Jungkook's fingers still on your clit, he pulls his fingers away. He, however, does not stop pumping in and out of you. His thrusts increase in force, since he no longer has you to meet him halfway.

Overwhelmed with the large amount of pleasure washing over your body like a wash, you fall against the boy's chest, trembling from the new pace that he has set. Feeling you shake against him, Jungkook wraps his arms around your frame to keep you in place and, quickly forgetting the stinging in his side from the adrenaline surging through his body, starts rutting up into you. Still spent and recovering from your earlier release, you are left with no choice but to grip the blankets next to you to try and stop the room from spinning, gasping and whimpering Jungkook's name until he's reaching his own end. He groans loudly, his first release hitting him like a train as he drops a broken version of your name into the void. He rides out his high, slowing down the rhythm of his hips until he's stopping entirely.

The room is filled with the sounds of pants and heavy breathing, the frantic heartbeat against each of your chests gradually starting to slow down into something more normal as the pair of you bask in one another's presence.

Finally, Jungkook pulls himself out of you and you whine momentarily at the loss before you lift yourself from Jungkook's chest to roll onto his side. Your eyes roam his face, taking in the sweaty complexion and the flushed cheeks, the half-lidded way he's watching you, and you reach out to brush some of the hair out of his face.

"That was so..." Jungkook speaks after a moment, staring right back at you. "Wow."

You laugh. "Wow indeed."

"Does this mean..." He speaks suddenly, lowering his head slightly to show his bashfulness on the subject. "Does this mean that you... that we...?"

"Does this mean that I like you?" You fill in softly, soft laughter filling the room. "Well, I don't ask anyone if I could take off their suit."

Jungkook bites his lip, reaching over to take some of your hair and tuck it behind your ear. "I really, really care about you Y/N," He manages thickly. "And I don't think... I wouldn't want... It's just that I..."

You press a finger to his lips. "Did you mean it?" You whisper.

"Mean what?"

"That I was your totem."

He doesn't hesitate to answer. "Yeah." He nods. "I meant it all." He pauses for a moment. “Did you mean it?” He returns. “When you said it should have been obvious that I was Spiderman?”

“Well, maybe not obvious, but… it makes sense,” You explain. “You’ve always been selfless and understanding and thoughtful. You always care so much for other people, even if people might not care for you. And you’re really funny, Jungkook. You’ve always been quiet and trying to hide from the world.”

“But you always saw me,” He fills in.

“Of course I did.” You say this like it should have been obvious, and it’s in that statement that he’s sure. Twenty seconds, right?

"I know that me being Spiderman might... make things complicated,” He starts with a cough. “But, uh, do you think I could... if we could go out some time?"

You look at him, smile dusting along your features as if he's just returned from hanging all the stars in the sky just for you. "I thought you'd never ask, Jungkook." You shift slightly to prop your head up slightly. "Was there something you had in mind?" Your eyes widen as soon as you ask the question before you're leaning forward to rest a hand against his chest. "Wait. Can we go swinging around the city?" You inquire, bright smile reaching every corner of your eyes as you crane your neck up to stare at him fondly.

Jungkook's shoulders shake with his laughter as he moves downwards slightly to kiss your forehead. "Anything for you."

[so-shiny-so-chrome]

Witness: Owlship

Creator name (AO3): Owlship

Creator name (Tumblr): v8roadworrier

Link to creator works: https://www.archiveofourown.org/users/owlship

Q: Why the Mad Max Fandom?

A: i am still asking myself this question! something about fury road grabbed me at just the right point in my life to interest me, and the people & community i found have been just wonderful at keeping me feeling interested & connected. i love that the world presented is clearly well thought-out and cohesive, while at the same time allowing for a huge variety of explorations even while staying strictly within the bounds of canon.

Q: What do you think are some defining aspects of your work? Do you have a style? Recurrent themes?

A: well, it's pretty clear that i adore the relationship between max & furiosa, since they star in 90% of my fics, and au's are kind of my thing. i don't consciously have a style that i write in- i just try and write more-or-less what i think could reasonably happen, i suppose, and to be honest i think of my actual writing as pretty utilitarian, rather than anything with a nice artistic style. probably the most frequent recurring theme in my fics is pining leading up to a happy ending, and i like to think i flirt with miller's idea of "engage to heal" pretty frequently as well.

Q: Which of your works was the most fun to create? The most difficult? Which is your most popular? Most successful? Your favourite overall?

A: i have fun with all my fics, or else they don't get written! i'm not good at making myself do things i don't want to do, especially if the only reason to be writing fic is to have fun in the first place. most difficult would probably be "birds in last year's nest" (the omega!max fic) because i really wanted to handle the issues in it well, while the easiest to get written was "out of the bag" (cat!furiosa) despite its length because it basically just wrote itself. my most popular is definitely "around the corner" (petshop au), which has a very dear place in my heart even if it's not the most polished of my fics. my favorite is usually whichever i've published most recently :)

Q: How do you like your wasteland? Gritty? Hopeful? Campy? Soft? Why?

A: hopeful above all, with a good balance of gritty and soft, depending on the particular fic. i like to explore the realistic effects of things, but i'm also happy to gloss over the tricky details in favor of fluff. i've only written one fic with an unhappy ending so far and i don't see myself adding to that number anytime soon, and i am just not great at humor so i avoid trying to be funny.

Q: Walk us through your creative process from idea to finished product. What's your prefered environment for creating? How do you get through rough patches?

A: my writing process is simple: i get an idea (usually i steal it), i bundle myself up in bed, and then i do other things while writing a sentence or two every few hours. sometimes i get into the groove and can bash out a few thousand words in a day, other times i flounder for weeks without anything holding my interest. when i do write i always work chronologically, which means finding the actual start of the fic can take a few tries, and figuring out the end can be difficult if i haven't really filled in the details in my head yet. for rough patches i put my head down and try to force words out, but if it doesn't want to happen i just let it go and move on, unless it's for a gift, or something like nanowrimo where i want those bragging rights. i don't use written outlines or keep notes of anything, which is a bad habit but one i can't shake. if it's not important enough for me to remember, how important was it really in the first place?

Q: What is your biggest challenge as a creator?

A: right now it's finding the motivation to write when i've got other stuff going on in my life, especially on days when i am tired out even on my days off. other than that- staying focused on a project long enough to get it finished! i also struggle with juggling multiple characters especially in the same scene, making sure that everyone gets their turn and sounds authentic.

Q: How have you grown as a creator through your participation in the Mad Max Fandom? How has your work changed? Have you learned anything about yourself?

A: my writing, both in terms of technical skills and how i compose a story, has just improved leaps and bounds since i started writing fics, thanks in large part to the feedback i'm lucky enough to get, as well as the sheer volume i've been able to put out. i've definitely learned a lot about what kinds of ideas interest me to write, which is not necessarily the same things i want as a reader.

Q: Which character do you relate to the most, and how does that affect your approach to that character? Is someone else your favourite to portray? How has your understanding of these characters grown through portraying them?

A: i probably relate to max the most, or at least the version of him that lives in my head- it's easy for me to get inside his pov, but that means i have to stop myself from making *every* fic his pov! furiosa is a close runner up in terms of how much i like writing her, which is lucky because she's the other 50% of my fics, but it's a lot harder for me to get inside her head, so i have to pay attention more to what i'm doing when i write her.

Q: Do you ever self-insert, even accidentally?

A: i probably do, but not intentionally. of course i use my own experiences and feelings when writing, but i always try to translate them to the mindset of whoever i am writing. it's just been drilled into my head too many times that writing yourself as a character is not what you are supposed to do, i think.

Q: Do you have any favourite relationships to portray? What interests you about them?

A: max & furiosa, 100%. platonic, romantic, as soulmates, as enemies- i love every possible permutation of how they can interact with each other since they're so similar but still very distinct. i love how much of their relationship is unspoken but perfectly understood- or not, and how that can set up their interactions.

Q: How does your work for the fandom change how you look at the source material?

A: i pay a hell of a lot more attention to what's happening in canon, and pick apart even minor gestures or bits of speech to really drill down into the character's heads. if i was just watching the movie(s) to enjoy them, i'd stay a lot more surface level instead of analyzing details like what the interior of the war rig says about furiosa, or what's in max's kit at the beginning of the movie vs the middle, etc.

Q: Do you prefer to create in one defined chronology or do your works stand alone? Why or why not?

A: nearly all of my works are unrelated. i love coming up with little tweaks that don't really effect anything but might contradict each other (which of the wives takes on what role post-canon, how long it takes before max comes back for the first time, etc), and writing in a single series would mean i'd have to address those differences. short fluff or pwp pieces where the entire fic is just a single scene tend to share enough similarities that you could imagine they take place in the same 'verse, but to be honest, that's just me being lazy ;b

Q: To break or not to break canon? Why?

A: canon is fake and the author is dead! that said, i do actually try and stick as close to the canon facts as possible unless it's something i'm deliberately changing, because after all without canon there wouldn't be any shared understanding of the characters that makes fanfic possible. this is one of the trickiest parts about writing an au, because i have to find the right balance of familiarity to canon with what's different about each au in order to have the changes i make to the characters/setting/etc make sense to the reader.

Q: Where do you get your ideas for your AUs?

A: all sorts of places! some of them are given to me- i love prompts- others i steal from other fandoms, like bodyswap or wings or turning furiosa into a cat, some i search out via idea generators, and at this point i honestly can't watch/read any new stories without going "but how can i turn this into an au??" i also like to say "what if" almost *constantly* and sometimes that leads to full fics, other times i just make a post on tumblr with some half-baked ideas of how it could work out. what if furiosa's mother didn't die before the movie? what if max had a pet dragon? what if it started raining and didn't stop? it's honestly harder for me to write a strictly canon fic at this point :)

Q: Share some headcanons.

A: i actually don't have a ton that apply to every fic, because i like switching things up- but here's some ones taken for granted in 99.99% of my canonverse fics: furiosa lives after the end of the movie without any major complications, max comes back to the citadel at some point, furiosa has her own room with not much more than a bed, a workbench, and a window, the war boys are willing to accept the wives as the new rulers (and that the wives form a council rather than a dictatorship), and somehow the bullet farm & gastown fall into line with the citadel's new way of thinking. also, max has a sweet tooth and furiosa doesn't remember most of her dreams.

Q: What advice can you give someone who is struggling to make their own works more interesting, compelling, cohesive, etc.? 

A: something i try to keep in mind at all times is: write for yourself and not your audience. does your heart of hearts want to ship those two characters? hell yeah make 'em kiss. have a scene that is super cliche or over the top but you can't stop thinking about? write it! your stories need to be interesting to you first and foremost, because a reader absolutely can sniff out the difference between a scene you thought would be "good" and one you had fun with. you can always edit later to shape your fic into a different direction if you feel like you need to.

Q: Have you visited or do you plan to visit Australia, Wasteland Weekend, or other Mad Max place?

A: i've been to wasteland weekend twice now and hope to visit many more times in the future! it's a super fun experience in general, and it's also helped me get a feel for what a mad max world would really be like, rather than just relying on my imagination. i'd love to visit australia some day, both for mad max and other reasons, but ideally not while there's an apocalypse going on.

Q: Tell us about a current WIP or planned project.

A: *throws dart at gdocs* let's see.... i've got a fic started where furiosa is a viking, and after a raid gone wrong she ends up injured at max's farm where she has to learn the language and customs and come to terms with being his slave (until they fall in love, obviously). haven't worked on that one since july but hey, it's not going anywhere.

Thank you @v8roadworrier

[coytoy]

RVB17 Ep. 2 Thoughts

“The Everwhen” -- spoilers beneath the cut!

Alright, wow, I am really enjoying this season so far. That sense of a cohesive story + conflict is something I’ve missed.

- Again, Donut the Hero to the rescue. I can barely believe we’re getting more character development in two episodes than in sixteen seasons (Somebody pinch me!). He actually has the depth he deserves and we must cherish him.

- Agent Maine/the Meta sighting? Fuck yeah! Doc appearance? Fuck yeah!

- Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think this may be the first time it’s actually been truly addressed that Wash shot Donut. I’m 99.99% sure it’s the first time Donut’s confronted Wash about it. You can hear the emotion in his voice and how it hurts him that Wash is being taken seriously despite what he did to Donut. “Oh that was years ago.”  So passive, but that’s how the Reds and Blues always had acted about it. I think that’s all gonna change.

-I also appreciate that we’re getting more focus on how Donut has constantly been thrown aside. “Just shut up” sums it up. Where even if he was gone for a whole season, they didn’t notice. Donut has never been taken very seriously, especially as he always has been just the “innuendo” character. Now will Donut be aware of that throughout the season and continue to be more than just an easy source of innuendo jokes? Fingers crossed!

- Alright, so the scene where the Reds out on a production about time travel is one of my favorites from BGC and this was no exception. “NO, I’m from the future.” Way to stay in character, Simmons. And is it just me, or is past-Grif catching on? Hmmm...

- And I’m glad if there’s one thing this fandom, me, and canon can all agree on, it’s Chrovos’ new voice is super sexy. I love Lee Eddy to BITS. Very enjoyable villain.

- Wash. Washington. David. I’ve missed him the last few seasons and was sad to see him relegated to a minor role after fantastic build-up in the Chorus Trilogy, though I have a feeling we’ll be seeing a lot of him in S17. Not only are we probably going to get the Donut-Wash team I never knew I wanted, but I’m getting the feeling that the “Wash shot Donut” conflict is going to be expanded upon and directly addressed within the pairing. Absolutely love it.

Can’t wait for next week! Potential sightings of some of our beloved Chorus characters as well? With my last semester of college proving difficult, RvB is gonna help me get through these last few weeks. See y’all next Saturday!

[sambart93]

2019.02.04 and 8th Amakuhanaize 3 [Review]

Official Website here Official Twitter here Official Online Store here Press Coverage 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

CAST and CHARACTERS

Itokawa Yojiro as Amami Annojyou Sakata Ryuichiro as Amakusa Tenshiro (10 Jin Actor) Futaba Kaname as Kakao Chiyota Futaba Yuu as Kakao Masubee Domoto Shohei as Sakamushi Manji Magoshi Takumi as Anou Kikai (10 Jin Actor) Matsushima Yunosuke as Haniitera Kazu (10 Jin Actor) Kajihara Hayate as Ogura Kanyou Mitsutake Shinnosuke as Origo Touji (10 Jin Actor) Yashiro Takuya as Kurumi Yuzunosuke Nishihara Kenta as Ameyatsu Nekichi Sekioka Mark as Clotted Scone (10 Jin Actor) Oribe Yoshinari as Shougoin Korekiyo Urashimantarou (Guest Act for Tokyo) Sato Chuuki as Kuzukiri Kuromitsu Nagome Jin as Taffe Natsu Shogun Aoki Shunsuke as Abekara Shinobu

As you can tell a lot of their names are things from dessert or sweet things (that's the whole theme and point xD)

NON-SPOILER REVIEW

Overall: This is the first time I’ve been somewhat disappointed in a Bancho stage. It was bound to happen eventually! Every time they’re one-upped, one-upped their performance, their stories, the quality, so we were bound to get to one sooner or later that just doesn’t quite reach the bar. This one is it. Don’t get me wrong!! It’s still: a very good play; lots of good comedy, lots of great acting, lots of really memorable moments, very funny, very enjoyable. But some aspects just weren’t good enough or at the standard of previous stages. I personally felt like there was too much exposition and explanation about the history and time period they were in (I found it unnecessary). I also felt like this was one big advertisement for 10 Jin Actor; I noticed pretty quickly that ALL the scripted comedy and all the major spotlight moments were given to them. Even though Yojiro and Kaname are supposed to be the main leads, I saw more scenes and more moments from the 10 Jin boys than from anyone else. So it definitely felt like this big 2 hour advertisement and push for their popularity. I also felt like it was their least funny play. I still laughed A LOT but you would expect a silly play like this to always be cranking out the laughs. I didn’t really laugh much during the first hour or so, but the final hour to 90 minutes are very funny. However, that first half is just a lot of character and history set up. The Bancho Boys themselves really got to shine during all the adlibbing. They pretty much adlibbed most of the time and of course they were more than capable, and got a lot of laughs not only from the audience but from the rest of the actors on stage which is great -- I personally love when actors break out of character and can’t stop laughing themselves, it just proves how much fun they’re having too! I have to say, seeing them (especially Yuu and Kaname) break into laughter on stage was the biggest reward for me and my favourite moments. Rating: 7/10 - Not their best but definitely not a bad play either.

SPOILER REVIEW

MAIN STORY

So Kaname plays a struggling chocolatier who has many worries as Valentine’s Day gets nearer. He falls asleep at a shrine after praying for his work to go well. When he wakes up, he’s back in the beginning of the Meiji Period (late 19th Century, 1868) in Fukuoka where his ancestors are from. He meets his ancestors and a range of characters who are trying to get through life during this difficult time of Japan’s transition to modern/western styles. In usual Amakuhanaize style, there is a food battle between the two opposing groups.

That’s the basic premise. I’d probably break the characters up into different groups though:

Running/Staying at an Inn and Minding Their Business: Kaname, Yuu, Domoto, NishiKen, and Magoshi.

Modernising Japan Team: Oribe, Hayate, Origo, Mark, Urashimantaro, Chuuki, Nagome, Aoki Shnusuke

Want to Protect Japanese-ness Team: Yojiro, Takuya

Converting Christians: Sakata, Yunosuke.

So there are really four different groups but some band together and that’s how we get two rivaling groups towards the end, a few of them switch sides and such too throughout the play, but this is at least how they start.

*

GENERAL COMMENTS

Depending on who wins the chocolate battle -- there is a 10 minute break towards the end of the play where we can try the chocolate they 'made' for that show and then vote which we prefer -- the ending is a little different. I was lucky that I got to see each person win between the two shows I went to! So I'll quickly write the difference between them:

1. If Amami/Yojiro Wins: Tenshiro walks off depressed but Kazu/Yunosuke runs after Tenshiro and tells him he'll always be there for him and Tenshiro feels better. 2. If Tenshiro/Sakata Wins: Yojiro comes back on stage and attempts to commit seppuku with an icing knife (is that what they are called? *googles* ... nope it's called an Icing Spatula! Well now we all know don't we ^_^) but obvious he is not serious about it and he tries to be positive about it.

Either way in the end he is able to open a pastry shop and welcomes in customers and has a grand opening. So the very last scene doesn't change just the scene immediately after the Win/Lose moment.

There is one part that is higawari and it's the night before the chocolate battle when all the boys in Yojiro's group have to answer some questions. The two questions are: What to Say When You Get Choco, and Choco You'd Hate to Receive.

My favourite scene without a doubt was the matsuri/festival scene and the opening dance number. In the matsuri they have this super fun dance number which just left me smiling from side to side. They looked to be having so much fun and were smiling too and the song had a great beat and the dance looked so much fun too! It was/is definitely my favourite scene out of this stage!

I have so many feelings about the characters in this. I enjoyed quite a lot of the character (why are we not surprised) so I'd like to just flail about them a little.

Character Break Downs and Comments

*I'll refer to them all with their actual real names though! Sorry if that's confusing.*

☆ Yojiro: Is one of the last remaining Samurai who are trying to hide from the changing political powers in Japan. I honestly don't know what to say about Yojiro... even though he's supposed to be one of the main roles, he had hardly any time on stage. And when he was on stage, he was playing a character I've already seen many times before from him. He didn't play anyone interesting; he didn't play anyone new; he had a very safe character and there was nothing amazing at all about his acting this time around. He was just alright both in terms of character and acting.

☆ Sakata: Catholic/Christian Priest in Japan. I went in really thinking I was gunna fall for this guy, but I ended up not liking his character at all. And just like Yojiro, he's advertised as a main role but was hardly in it! I can only remember about 2 scenes he was properly in. I am upset he ended up being an uninteresting character because Sakata himself has such a fun auro about him. He seems like a really nice and a really fun guy! Also he plays priest who is trying to spread the word of God... I am personally not a religious person and I prefer my stories not to have religion in it so this is just a me thing. His character IS a nice and good person but I just wasn't interested.

However, there is one good moment I liked from Sakata. There is a scene where he is capture and locked up but while talking to the guard, he all so easily opens the jail gates and gets out. But then like the good person he is, at the end of his scene, he gets back in the jail and closes the gate again xD

☆ Kaname: Chocolatier from Present Day Tokyo who Time Slips into 1868 Fukuoka. I really fell for his acting in this!! I really, really enjoyed his acting and his character! Also his dancing is very good! You can tell all that Tenimyu training really paid off! He character was fun and he had some ridiuclous moments and sometimes unfortunate things happen to his character too which was funny! And of course there were some classic moments with him and YuuKun which created hilarity too!

☆ YuuKun: Kaname's Mother and Ancestor, Also an Inn Owner. On my first viewing, I was 99.99% sure he plays a female this entire play but actually he just plays Kaname's mother in the beginning but then in the time slip he's a male ancestor of Kaname's family. But it would totally make sense if he played a woman the entire time. He has his onee-san voice for the entirety of the play! Also his character in the past is obsessed with a male Kabuki actor, his personality is very faint and soft and weak-looking, it would've made sense to have him as a girl the entire time xD SO in my mind he DOES play Kaname's mother and great grandmother the entire time hehe I absolutely loved how he plays a fan. He plays a Kabuki obsessed fan and he said a lot of stuff that the audience could clearly relate to and the way he flailed over stuff and spoke so passionately about his oshi/bias was so relateable and so much fun to watch! He was GREAT!

Once I saw the play, I soon understood why Kaname and YuuKun had both dyed their hair back black. YuuKun had to because he was playing a historical role, and I guess to make to MORE obvious they were playing family relatives xD

☆ Domoto: A Drunkard Who Lives at the Inn. I’m pretty sure he wasn’t ACTING drunk for this role xD his drunk acting was great! I also really loved this one scene bewteen him and Takuya:

- Takuya pretends to be a simpleton passing by when Domoto attacks him and of course Takuya, being a samurai, can dodge the attack and Domoto is super impressed and responds 'oh you not just a normal person at all. No normal person can avoid and react that well' but Takuya thinks Domoto will sell him out to the police but Domoto's character is a good boy so stays quiet and protects him. It was such a simple moment but I really liked this scene.

Also Domoto's eye makeup is so nice up close!!! I got a good look when I took chekis with him and it really is nice! There is one other moment from Domoto that really hit home for me. Lately, I've been having a really rough time mentally but this simple line from Domoto gave me so much strength: "None of my friends made it through the war. They can't drink stupidly. They can't wear flashy over the top clothing. I living their life as well as mine." It really hit home but it gave me strength that I really need right now.

☆ Magoshi: A Crazy Inventor Living in the Inn. His character had two very funny personalities: when his goggles were off he was very confident and very sane. But whenever he wore his goggles, he became geeky as F. He gave everyone many many laughs with his flawless switching between the two roles! He did very well! His name was also a play on words. His name is Anou Kikai which means 'That Chance' but also 'Ano' is what you say when you want to say something, it's the English equivalent of 'ohhh / ahhhh / ummm' when you want to start saying something. So many times Kaname's character wanted to offer to help or wanted to suggest things but he always started with 'Ano = Ummm' and Magoshi would immediately butt in like 'Anou Kikai shall do this task!' and Kaname always looked so sad every time he got shot down xD

☆ Yunosuke: Sakata's Disciple. He has a very interesting story arc and his character development is very fun! I don't quite remember how he ends up like this but Yunosuke very quickly joins the 'money' side of society and gets obsessed with gold and flashy jewelry and he is very ridiculous and very hilarious. He gave me a lot of giggles with his overconfidence and with his loud voice and his ridiculing of others! But then towards the end, he sees Sakata give guidance and attention to someone other than him and he just completely explodes with jealously, which again he does in a very hilarious way. I thoroughly enjoyed his character! And he is beautifully tall and very good looking. It's a shame he's only 19 because he was gorgeous. I really liked his character and how he looked!

☆ Hayate: A Reporter. He was a reporter who turns from a dirty gossip reporter to a report who actually wants to do good for the people. He gives Oribe a run for his money because he's constantly following him and trying to get the true story. Hayate showed off his skills throughout this play with his acrobatics and his flips. He would make an entrance by flipping, or in some fights he got caught up in he would do a flip, or during the dance scenes he did some hiphop spin moves. So he really find many chances to show off what he can do; I assume this is part him personally enjoying doing these stunts and part him showing what he can do incase casting directors turned up to the stage.

☆ Mitsutake: Oribe's Henchman/Guard. I absolutely loved that he got nicknamed 'Beard / Hige' by Sakata in this. It gave everyone giggles everytime he was called xD I also loved his character arc too! At first he's on Oribe's side but thanks to Sakata, he has a change of heart and decides to do the right thing and starts helping us just because he should, because he wants to, and because it's the right thing to do.

☆ Takuya: Yojiro's Disciple/Follower. Takuya is getting so damn good looking as he gets older! I don't know why but as soon as he came on stage in the semi-modern samurai attire and his sword, I was in LOVE! I absolutely adored his look! And with is now longer hair!! OH MY!!! Seriously, he's gunna be dangerous soon. He's still only 19! *cries*

☆ NishiKen: A Neighbour Near the Inn. Luckily there was no black face or racism in his character this time xD he was just a neighbour who is slightly strange. He's dressed like a fox and helps out at a local matsuri/festival. I really liked the opening scene which is just him and wooden blocks and with the blocks he starts a beat and gets everyone in the audience clapping and singing We Will Rock You but then is like 'you're so loud! Shhhh!' which is ironic. He's always the most loud xD

☆ Mark: British Politician. I really really enjoyed his pompousness and the stereotypicalness of his British character. Also loved the American Accented English words he would speak. He was a fun character, he had this funny way of walking too; he would skip or spin in and out of his entrances which were very amusing. I also loved his outfit and his hat.

☆ Oribe: Japanese Politician/Leader. He had a very small role which made me upset but he was still good! I like how he spent most of his time running away from Hayate but then the moment he realises someone else's corruption he runs to Hayate like 'I'll tell you everything! Just please protect me!!' xD he looked very dashing in his suit!! But again, I was like 'damn how are you STILL only 18?!' xD His dancing during the two major dancer parts were wonderful!

*

Now onto some differences between the two shows!

First Show

☆ There is a scene where Yuu pushes Kaname to the side. But at my first show, Kaname went flying the end of the stage and into the stage light because of Yuu’s push, and Yuu threatened to do it again but Kaname was like 'No it's okay! I learnt my lesson! Just don't do it again!' he was half smiling as he stood up and rubbed his back and butt xD

☆ Akira and Shuji were sat two rows in front of me and during a scene where Hayate runs around the theatre, he spotted them and was like 'you look very familiar... aren't you (enter their Amaku Character's name)?' but both of them got really nervous and shy and denyed it, hoping he would leave quickly xD

☆ For the Higawari scene, I remember Mark having a drawing of Domoto, and YuuKun's answers were always baseball references xD

Second Show

☆ The second show was a hot mess of hilarity! Everyone, the cast AND the audience, were just high on giggles. The entire play there were so many line mess ups and the boys couldn't stop laughing for most of the time. Even when they tried really hard, they ended up breaking halfway through their lines and such. It was so much fun seeing all of them completely break xD I'm glad it was my second viewing and not my only viewing of it. Maybe if it was my only viewing I might've been a little miffed but because it was my second viewing I could just enjoy the ridiculousness that went on!

☆ YuuKun didn't push Kaname as hard this time so when Kaname asked for the chocolate back, YuuKun just gave it back nicely hehe

☆ For the scene where they had to give an answer to: What to Say When You Get Choco, Mark's answer was all in Filipino and everyone was like '????? what did you just say?!'

☆ Because everyone was high on something, during Sakata's very important line of serious, he held it together right well until right at the end of his line and he just broke into a squeal of laughter. Everyone was dying.

NEGATIVES

A lot of these points are just extensions of what mentioned in the non-spoiler section:

☆ I realised very early on that the 10 Jin boys were getting more lines and more moments and more comedy than our Bancho Boys so it really did feel like an advertisement for their acting group. 

☆ Also this is the first time I’ve been somewhat disappointed in a Bancho stage. This is a SOLID installment but it was just the weakest one I’ve watched of theirs so far. Especially after the amazingness that was Nemurenai Hitsuji and Saraba Gold Mountain (review) that we got last year.

☆ I was very much expecting for myself to really like Sakata Ryuichiro (especially with the whole blonde look -- we ALL know how I feel about blondes!), but I ended up finding his character really, really boring, and he was playing a heavy Christian believer (side note: I am Agnostic after being brought up in Catholic education for 12 years) so I personally lost all interest in him straight away.

*

PHOTO & CHEKI TIME

I got chekis with my usuals: YuuKun and Domoto! As usual they're both just so great! Even though it's a small, minute moment, it still means a lot to me.

So first I went to YuuKun and can he get anymore perfect?!?!?!?! He's just the sweetest fucking thing every time! And he always takes the lead and asks me questions and such xD So our conversation was:

Me: Otsukaresama desu / Thanks for the good work Yuu: OH! Thank you! I asked to do the heart pose but just before it's taken, he prods me, 'hold on. let's move over here, it's a better place. Is that okay? Are you ready?' so naturally I was like 'oh, okay. Yes! I'm good!' so then we took the picture. Y: Did you have fun? M: Yes I laughed a lot! Y: Don't forget our lives too! M: I already have tickets! Y: Oh thank you! M: And I'll come back on Friday (to see this) Y: Oh really? Thank you! *hands me the cheki* bye! *waves* M: Bye! *waves*

Then with Domoto...

M: Otsukaresama desu / Thanks for the good work D: Thank you! You too! Do the heart pose and take chekis M: I'm really sorry I was too sick to come to your birthday party. D: Oh don't worry about it! It's fine! Please don't apologise! M: Really? Oh thank god. *hands me cheki* M: get home safely! D: You too! *mutual wave*

I finally got to properly apologise to Domoto which made me feel a lot better xD Also I love how awkward he is in the chekis. He has such an awkward adorableness hehe

At the end of every show too there was a 'Photo Time' so here are some I took:

*

And that’s that!

[tanithrea]

Sunday 6VIXXs

Sitting sipping on a hot chocolate (instant, not the melt the choc and add all extras that becomes an epic journey of self discovery type) and watching vixx is a wonderful way to spend the 3pm break time.

while you enjoy an actual day not at work and an afternoon where you can’t phone or fix things cause companies are closed, there is no mail, and you have resigned yourself to the fact you may or may not achieve any domestic chores, sort your life out, order messages to come so you have lunches all next week, call your Gran cause you have been a neglectful grand-daughter, order xmas pressies cause doing any xmas shopping in December is just a no when you work in retail...etc.

And a great number of things have taken up my mind space this week. I have had moments of almost anxiety/panic and been able to push them back down.

Then there have been highs of going to see Dylan Moran (Irish comedian absolutely hilarious, watch his dvds or the tv show Black Books), going on a staff night out that was more fun than expected and even though my voice was not at its best when I was enlisted to karaoke the others are all still impressed.

I have been contemplating things I see on my tumblr feed and some things that stick out today:

1. I have no idea who they are, edawn & Hyuna I think, don’t know their groups or history or anything but reading that a company fired two idols for simply admitting they were dating is a reprehensible action and I would hope a legally wrong one so the couple can sue. Also cause they found out from the internet. It is ridiculous to punish their careers for this and although I get that the groups are staying quiet about it all out of fear of their own jobs I personally would have a hard time if I didn’t speak out to support my colleague in this time.

As for the toxic ‘fans’ (don’t care what country you are from) who petitioned to fire them, who send hateful stuff to them and for the insane claim that their dating incurred “financial and emotional harm” to them you need a hard slap and a reality check.

You are never going to date your fav idol. He isn’t going to see you in a crowd of 5000 and go wow that’s the one for me. You are not and will never be in a relationship with them. They are people and when not performing or in public they have friends, family, history, ex’s, issues, outbursts and they poop just like everyone else.

99.99% of us won’t even see our fav idols live let alone touch or interact with them and if I buy an album or support my bias - I support him for who he is and I want him to be happy and if that becomes him married or having kids - then I will support that too. He isn’t lying to me by singing these lyrics and then falling for someone, you don’t own idols. They are looking for their lobster just as much as any of us. They have suffered hardships, possibly gone through traumas and could have any number of scary life experiences, why would you want to be remembered for being in that catagory? You don’t and shouldn’t have the power to crush them at a whim of adolescent bunny boiler jealousy. Get over it and see the real humans they are. Also if you think it’s ok to send horrible msgs about death threats and suicide to idols not only are you a sorry human being you need help. Seek professionals.

2. I have been watching kdramas and just finished Bride Of The Water God. It was good although it stumbled in bits and pacing was off there were some really good 😱💔😭😍moments. Also the guys in it were so hot! Lol

im now back into catching up on Hongbin in witch’s love although I know what the ending is going to bring. Wishing he got to really show his ever increasing talents more. Can’t wait to see all the VIXX drama performances like Beans and N have so far in the coming months.

Actor wise I am loving Park Seo-Joon, Woo Do-Hwan, Park Hyungsik, Nam Joo-Hyuk, Ahn Jae-Hyun, Song Seung-Heon, Seo Kang-Joon, Lim Ju-Hwan, all of the Hwarang cast really, Lee Jonghyun and of course all the acting ViXX memebers!

On my list to watch ASAP is - W, Mad Dog, Tempted, Save Me, What’s Wrong With Secretary Kim, Are You Human Too?, Manhole, Triangle, Tunnel, Lovely Horribly, Sassy Go Go, Goblin, Photo People, Spellbound, The Legend of The Blue Sea, The Starry Night The Starry Sea, Scarlet Heart, Protect The Boss....a ton more. Hyuks Chasing, and new upcoming project. Catch up on Familiar Wife and hope that someone uploads the TV showing of Mata Hari with Leo.

Saw trailer for Bleach today so adding that to list, switched, Solomon’s perjury, mr sunshine, man to man, a man called god and a few others.

Shows I reccomend - Wednesday 3:30pm, Orange Marmalade, Moorim School, Tunnel, Bride Of The Water God, Blood, Black, Forgotten, We Got Married (Lee Jonghyun), Newlywed Diary s1, Spy, Hwarang, My Only Love Song, Strong Woman Bong Soon

In non kdrama inspired stuff - recently saw Searching... and it was brill. Highly reccomend and genius filming idea. Pulled off the way it should be and others failed to do. The Spy Who Dumped Me was disappointing and didn’t gel well despite the few hilarious scenes in the film. The Happy Gang Murders- ok but wait for it on sky movies or Netflix. Looking forward to seeing Crazy Rich Asians on Tuesday after work!

3. Although I still haven’t found another group I could say ‘I love them’ cause I’m hard set VIXX, the last few weeks I have opened to a few guys and groups through friends and exposure.

I added Kim Jaejoong to my list pretty quickly lol then Lee Jonghyun, Park Hyungsik and I would say mainly cause my kpop guro mate and guide Jackie I have seen a lot of Monsta X and I didn’t really feel a link to any of them but having seen the emotional side of Wonho he would be the one I would add to the list, just not quite there yet but almost.

I have listened to a lot more of their music, and I feel like I’m open to hearing others yet I recoil into vixx as soon as I see posters and gifs about other bands claiming they are record breaking at whatever chart/award/audience numbers/hair dying/stripping on stage...etc whatever statistics it is cause I get that defensive pang for my boys.

So I totally understand the passions folks have for their group/s. I have it too.

Just listen to the other instincts as well that say that other group worked hard too, each should get a share of the limelight and they each have their own struggles they went through to get there. Try to ignore the impulse to roam stomping around the internet screaming your band/bias is the only talented super human in the universe while eating everyone else’s as snacks. But do share, get excited, encourage new listeners/fans, support and go bonkers happy. 👍🏻😉

4. Everything is being turned into musicals. While I LOVE a good musical not every single topic in the world is suited to it. Lol also in saying that I’m super happy Leo has another musical casting as Death character Tod in Das Elisabeth. He loves the stage and singing so it’s just pure joy for him. Also Ken announcing he has a run as Man In The Iron Mask king and again seriously hoping some starlights get some clips to share up on YouTube cause we/I are desperate to see these. Lol my almost stroke after regaining consciousness seeing leo as death poster was seeing what looks like Park Hyungsik in the same role. Meaning two of my list working together and in rehearsals together...⚰️😍need a pic of that and some official confirmations what I’m seeing in the pic is truly who I think it is!

I will now sort some dinner, maybe binge some kdrama, have a shower and go to bed as I totally enjoy my totally wasteful Sunday which at this point would only be made better by being snuggled up to bias/nice guy watching a movie/show with the special hot chocolate I mentioned at the start. I hope you all have a restful night, if you are working today then when your day off comes I hope it’s perfect and relaxing. 👍🏻😉💖🌟

[crystalkleure]

...Do you suppose Ashram was using all of those training machines in the first room of the Snake Pit as power generators?

Because it's pretty obvious that ALL of what Ashram initially SAID he was doing down there was a lie. Because the end goal was the Requiem Project thing, the Snake Pit was a front for that. So I don't believe those 'trainees' were ever intended to graduate up into Mask Guy status, judging from how Silver Eye attempted to explain their situation, for one:

"Weakness is a sin, if you die you lose, they've just gotta keep going and persevere through it and uh actually please just don't think about it too much tbh lol" No, Ashram HAS to know that that kind of training, 99.99% of the time, is only going to result in a dead kid, not a stronger one. You can just look at Free for a not-quite-deadly example of the effects of unhealthy "training" that's too intense. That shit he did with the rocks fucked him up to the point where his muscles were so strained he eventually couldn't move his arm anymore. And also there was Shuu with the shoulder issue in s1; to keep pushing on when you're exhausted/injured is only going to exacerbate the exhaustion/injury until it disables or kills you. Ashram was literally just working those trainees to death, and in a repetitive, monotonous way. With big machinery.

And also look at the guys who DO have masks? They damn sure don't look or act like they've been through the same "trainee" stage as Boa. And Shuu's e.36 flashback even shows Ashram just outright handing Shuu his "Red Eye" mask. And the trainee guys all have the same too-thin, wiry body type, whereas the masked boys all have a bit of a wider variety of body types. One of them is even fat. They seem like they were picked especially for their roles [also the colour theme they've got going on to perfectly mirror Valt's group is a Distinct Thing that is not coincidental, too], they were obviously not "trained" half to death like Boa.

To me, the promise of becoming a revered Masked Blader feels more like the carrot on a stick being dangled in front of a mule to get it to keep working. Where the 'mule' in this case would be the trainee guys.

So, the basic Snake Pit training would not produce the effect Ashram stated it would in most cases, and even if it did, he...didn't need it to. He already had Shuu and even another handful of backup masked guys to use for his ultimate 'strongest beyblade' goal, he really didn't need any more.

But the Snake Pit was huge, and it was out in the middle of nowhere with no visible power lines running to it so an on-site generator HAD to be what was powering it, and there were a ton of those trainees. So the most logical thing I can figure Ashram was using those trainees for would be energy generation. Human batteries. That entire first room just looks like a kid-powered generator. And the machines are pretty much definitely hooked up to SOMETHING, because there are those big screens all over the place displaying what is presumably data from them [at least partially].

Waste not, want not, I guess. If your facade facility attracts more kids than you know what to do with, burn them like coal! That's certainly not evil, much less very illegal, at all!

[hope-faith-love-abide]

Non-spoilery thoughts on Voltron season 6: I laughed and I cried. A lot.

Spoilery thoughts under the cut.

MY SON HAS RETURNED!!!! Not quite in the way I expected (but Allura was the one who did it!! She brought him out of the Black Lion’s astral plane!!! YAAAASSSS), because I was really hoping we’d get to have both original Shiro and Kuron!Shiro separately and they’d get to interact and be like brothers or something. I really grew attached to Kuron. It wasn’t his fault that he was a clone; he really believed he was who he thought he was, and he was trying his best. Haggar was too strong for him though, poor bby.

And I guess Haggar is technically gone now and has returned as Honerva. Oriande helped return her back to herself, I guess - y’know, outside of the fact that she’s still definitely corrupted from her quintessence exposure and she doesn’t appear to have any desire to change that. I’m sad we didn’t get to see more of her, but she’ll probably be increasing her role even more in seasons to come. Definitely still thinking she’ll be the final Big Bad that Team Voltron has to defeat.

I was somewhat surprised by Lotor this season but at the same time not? Definitely surprised by the secret Alteans (even though I have read about that fan theory before) and that Lotor helped save them - but then also was definitely doing some shady business on the side too. But all that, to me personally, was a good surprise from a story/character perspective. I’m REALLY glad that he’s still remaining a very grey character, with both good intentions and bad ones. That’s what I liked about Lotor when he was first introduced in s3 - that he has different goals than Zarkon and some are perhaps even actually good, but he’s not just this “poor victimized bad boy with a secret heart of gold” or something like that. He already had his good and bad sides on full display even in his first episode imo: the whole display in the arena, showing mercy to the guy who was talking behind his back about overthrowing him, then secretly giving an order to send the guy to the very outpost Lotor would later attack and get the guy in trouble with Haggar, all while Lotor smirks behind a wall listening to Haggar torture him.

So all this very much feels in line with his character, and I LOVED watching how Sincline worked. It was so interesting how different it was to Voltron’s style of fighting. I was a little preoccupied from watching the fight at times because of the previous revelation about Shiro technically being dead (the beginning of my tears), but I tried my best to focus on what was happening, and when I did, it was definitely great. Fantastic fight scene, especially when they went into the quintessence rift thing. I thought for sure the rift creature were going to show up, especially with all the dark particles floating in the background, but they didn’t. And I am 99.99% certain that Lotor is not lost forever in that rift. It doesn’t seem like a proper end to his character arc, imo, so I think he’ll get out somehow in the future. Maybe Honerva finds him?

Also also Romelle is really cool. I love her design and can’t wait to see what her role will be in the future!

And Keith and Krolia! Loved seeing them interact and getting to see into their past! That was a pretty clever way to put those flashbacks in there, with them tracking down the quintessence in a place where time is different and the waves of energy make them see the past. Also that space fox/wolf/creature is super cute.

AND then we also get to see some Keith and Shiro flashbacks later, after Haggar takes control of Kuron and he defeats the team and takes Lotor to her. The whole Keith vs. Shiro fight scenes were so good and so emotional, and I love their brotherly bond. (Also RIP to all those other Shiro clones that were stuck in those pods and dropped into the abyss? light? whatever it was.)

Also, I LOVED Hunk and Pidge this season. Their friendship is so good. Plus Hunk getting a big focus in the first episode and showing off his engineering skills? YES.

And the DnD episode was really fun. It didn’t feel out of place or make the pacing weird in the way I felt the Voltron Show episode kinda did in s4, even though I enjoy that episode too. But it was fun seeing the group (minus Keith) being dorks and having fun together. I bet they’ll play this a bunch once the war is over!

And I think...is that all I have to say right now? I think I covered everything I wanted to ramble about. I’m sure I might be forgetting some things, but I’ll just make another post if I want to gush/ramble on even more! Anyway, REALLY great season. It got me super nervous and upset there for awhile, but overall, it was fantastic.

[howyoutalktostrangers]

So,

I’ve never met a more nonchalant shit-disturber.

Decked out in a Santa hat and Harry Potter spectacles, Chris Elston was on the streets of Victoria this week trying to raise awareness about the problematic nature of Bill C-6. It’s part of a larger campaign that saw him erect billboards all across North America earlier this year to express his support and solidarity for author J.K. Rowling, who has been mobbed relentlessly by activists for her stance on gender issues.

Literary Goon connected with Elston on the steps of the Legislature to chat about freedom of thought, conversion therapy and gender ideology in schools. Literary Goon: I understand you're a kindred fan of J.K. Rowling and the Harry Potter series, and you recently finished reading Goblet of Fire with your daughter for the first time. I still remember how I felt when I reached the end of that book, how energized I was by how the narrative was exploring progressively darker themes as Harry aged. What lessons and insights have you gained from J.K. Rowling's work, and how does it inform your current worldview? What does her work signify for you as a parent?

Chris Elston: The Harry Potter books don’t exactly inform my worldview, but they are full of wisdom and inspiration which is very helpful. I am also fortunate to have magical spectacles like I do, where Muggles think they are without lenses. What Muggles don’t realize is that my spectacles enable me to peer deep within the gendered soul, and when I gaze very deeply, I can always see that the gendered soul is a myth!

Sex is binary and always will be. People should be able to express themselves however they please, but to deny biological reality is folly.

I will say that J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series inspires good in people. J.K.’s genius, imagination, and strong moral fiber shine through in the books, as Harry undergoes injustice after injustice, and is forced to call upon courage he doesn’t know he has. He just carries on, fighting, as we all must do right now.

As Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts, said, “It is important to fight and fight again, and keep fighting, for only then can evil be kept at bay though never quite eradicated.”

L.G: Earlier this year you erected a billboard in Vancouver that was quickly and unceremoniously taken down by angry activists who characterized this declaration of love as hate speech. Since then, you've arranged for billboards all over North America, all with the same message: "I <3 J.K Rowling".

For your efforts, you've had your business and social media accounts mobbed, you were arrested while peacefully protesting, and you've drawn nationwide attention to your mission. What are you trying to accomplish?

C.E.: The billboard was taken down by Pattison Outdoor — one of the companies owned by billionaire Jimmy Pattison — after Vancouver City Councillor, Sarah Kirby-Yung, kicked and screamed and threw a hissy fit on social media, complaining that a declaration of love was HATE SPEECH.

Oh, the absurdity of it all. Love does not equal hate.

After that, with the help of two anonymous donors, several Canadians, and people worldwide via GoFundMe — before GoFundMe’s censorship and cancellation — a billboard went up in San Francisco, 15 billboards went up in Utah, 14 digital screens displayed our message throughout the underground Metro network in Washington, D.C., Los Angeles and Portland. And finally, Times Square in New York City.

What am I trying to accomplish? That is very simple. I am trying and succeeding in having one conversation at a time, and I encourage other people to have one conversation at a time. The more conversations, the better. People need to understand what is going on in society, especially with our children. Children cannot speak up for themselves; they have neither the knowledge or experience or appreciation of history to understand what is going on. They are being lied to in our schools by a trans ideology that was snuck into our school lesson plans without any consultation with parents.

If politicians refuse to listen, it is up to us as the citizenry to spread awareness ourselves, so that we can arm other parents and children with the truth. Once the truth is known, it acts as armour against any lies which try to insidiously seep in through our schools, and elsewhere in society.

L.G.: You successfully recorded politician Nicola Spurling lying on video during this most recent election campaign. She denied apologizing to J.K. Rowling after calling her a danger to children, then doubled down on that accusation -- despite the fact that this interaction is now a part of the public record. You've also tangled with well-known liar and vexatious litigant Jessica Yaniv, and the former NDP politician who defunded Vancouver's Rape Relief Centre, Morgane Oger. What would you like the public to know about these three individuals, and why do you judge them worthy of your opposition?

C.E: I don’t judge them worthy of my opposition. Or anyone else’s, for that matter. What they’re worthy of is being exposed as the vexatious, vindictive, troublemaking liars and bullies that they are. They find shelter for their incredibly nasty behaviour underneath the baby blue and pink of the trans flag, which people don’t dare to cross, because to do so brings unprecedented harassment.

Any extremist ideology that can’t stand on its merits and has to use lies and bullying to silence fair criticism is an ideology that needs to be exposed. These three hooligans are perfect spokespeople for the lying extremists who try to silence any concerned citizen into submission through intimidation.

L.G.: There aren't many men involved in the gender critical movement, partially because they don't feel welcome to contribute. You've now experienced blowback from potential allies such as feminist speaker Meghan Murphy, who have disavowed your actions and disassociated themselves from your campaign. Why do you think it's important for men to speak out on this issue, and why is there so much opposition to them doing so?

C.E.: Meghan Murphy literally said this is a women’s only movement. Okay, that sounds like a totally different movement from anything I’m involved in. I’m not sure what it is, but I hope it’s very successful.

It’s important for men to speak out because we are fathers and sons and husbands and brothers and because this affects children all across society. On the subject of women’s sex-based rights, it affects our wives and mothers and adult daughters. Everyone should be concerned about this. Who cares what their sex is? This is a tragedy and an emergency because 99.99% of us have been asleep, while activists have been busy planning and succeeding in getting our laws changed, effectively eliminating the sex binary.Who is anyone to say that a father of daughters should not be speaking out? And then to lie and lie in an effort to sabotage my efforts?

It’s stunning and would be quite fascinating, if not for the real damage all these lies have caused to the campaign. Lies that hurt a campaign like this might as well be direct efforts at harming children, as far as I’m concerned. Anyway, onwards and upwards. “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.” – Winston Churchill.

The truth has at least one leg of its pants on now. Social media can be a rather inhospitable place, but it plays an important role in bringing people together, and in sharing ideas. In the real world, support has grown day by day and continues to do so. No government, organization, or individual can stop free speech and compassionate conversation, and that is what I will continue to do.

L.G.: I was on the receiving end of a social media mobbing by trans activists while I was an editor at the Humber Literary Review, where activists campaigned behind the scenes to have me de-platformed for wrongthink. This is just one example of how TRAs are threatening people's livelihoods all over Canada and across the globe for expressing their beliefs. To me, the most egregious part of this whole conversation is the way diversity of thought is becoming villainized. What do you think these activists fail to understand about freedom of speech and expression?

C.E.: The transgender activists understand freedom of speech and expression perfectly well, which is why they always try to shut it down.Truth always wins. They know that. This is a craze. It will go on as long as it goes on, but that won’t be forever. It won’t end with a bang, but with a whimper.

As more and more of us get educated, more of us will be in position to speak out, act out, and vote out our politicians.

L.G.: Gender ideology in schools is particularly alarming to me, as the father of a new daughter. I want her to grow up without having regressive, sexist anti-science rhetoric in her classroom -- but that's exactly what SOGI 123 offers. What options do parents have who object to this curriculum, and how do you think we can bring common sense back to the conversation around gender identity?

C.E.: Common sense already exists in the vast majority of our population. Each school board has say over the materials that are used in the classroom, in order to accomplish the broad curriculum goals of the Ministry of Education. We need to speak with our school trustees, or vote them out and install better ones, if needed.But teachers also have autonomy over what and how they teach in their classrooms. Parents should have discussions with teachers.This is simply a case of creating broad awareness of what is potentially being taught to our children, so that parents can get actively engaged, and act accordingly.

Read the lesson plans at https://bc.sogieducation.org/sogi3.

The Literary Goon

[bureaubitch-a]

OOC.   #( ... only after i post an anti mutsvrie thing tho lmao just wait for it )

ok i was browsing the character tags early this morning which is always a mistake,  but i was at least able to pinpoint something else that bothers me about this ship. i’d say 99.99% of the content for it casts urie in this role as like ... mutsuki’s savior, his patient and understanding and caring boyfriend who always has comforting things to say and wants to protect him and devote all his time and attention to him. which already i think is a mischaracterisation, because this is urie and even when he wants to show he cares about people, he seems to have an inability to actually voice or show it in a normal way. 

but more than that i just feel like urie’s not in a position where he can devote everything to someone else, because even though you can say mutsuki had it worse, urie’s still had to face a huge amount of his own trauma, including but not limited to lifelong abandonment issues from his father’s death, recently having one of his only friends die in his arms, and permanently destroying his health to the point where he’s actually destroyed his humanity along with it  ( and that’s from the stress of trying to look after the people he cares about. )  urie has huge issues of his own that always seem to have to take a backseat to mutsuki’s problems, and while that might be something he’s theoretically willing to do for a partner  ( again, it’s urie, he doesn’t like talking about himself or showing weaknesses )  i don’t find it to be a remotely healthy or desirable setup. once again it always reads as miserably out of character to have him always ready to offer support when he’s barely holding his own life together.  

... while i’m at it though, that does tie in with something i’ve been considering about urie and relationships, so a headcanon: the people he’s attracted to are the ones that seem to have their lives in perfect order. confident, successful people. i think he recognizes he’s at a limit for how much stress he can handle, and a potential relationship that promises more emotional labor is a turn off  ---  he wants someone he can ignore his problems with and pretend his life is better than it actually is.  ( ... surprise that he’s single? ) 

[kcllers]

Introducing JAKE KELLER -- the product of Linc’s late-night journey through GIFs of sad boys™ earlier this week! Below the cut you will find a brief history, fun facts, and my general blurbs about this artsy lil mofo. ( Also me being a trash biscuit but honestly what’s new. )

Once upon a time, an infant boy was given up for adoption in Texas by a nineteen year old mother who, after much thought and consideration, deemed that her abilities to parent wouldn’t suffice. It was, perhaps, a selfless act in guaranteeing her child a shot at the best life -- but that doesn’t mean said child, now twenty-two and in the spotlight, can’t resent her for it.

With striking green-blue eyes, the child was taken in by foster parents in the suburbs of Austin within a few weeks, and that baby boy came to be known as Jake Keller. Bright-eyed and curious, he dazzled the Keller family and their friends, even managing to befriend their neighbor’s parakeet after it escaped. Synopsis: young Jake Keller was a fucking charmer. Intelligent, adventurous, observant -- by the time he was three, the Kellers had led him to memorize all of the major world capitals. And, quite impressively, the young boy began to give whimsical water color paintings to anyone and everyone with whom he crossed paths. ( One day, when Jake was five, he got screamed at by a neighbor for riding his bike on their lawn and crushing their flower bed. The next day, he tacked a painting of nearly identical flowers onto the ground he’d ruined. )

In elementary school, Jake was the type to draw on his friends’ hands, arms, and jeans. Layla King even asked him to doodle in Sharpie on the toes of her brand new hightops. Pictionary was Jake’s calling -- the other kids loved when it was his turn to draw.

Up until his ninth birthday, his family life and school life couldn’t be better. That is, until his foster parents noticed how much time he was spending with Colin Redford and caught them linking pinkies in the back yard. To the Kellers’ dismay, other parents at the fourth grade open house gushed about how strange it was when their children, bewildered, came home on the first day of school describing how Jake had kissed Colin on the cheek at recess.

So, what’s a foster family to do when they discover shit they don’t like? Play the system. When Jake returned home from riding his bike around one night, he overheard his foster parents -- really parents, to him -- frantically discussing what to do with him. “We’ll get him gone, Karen,” his foster father had reasoned, “I’ve got a plan.” The next day was Jake’s last day at school before he was taken away by DCF and plunked into a group home for children struggling aggression. The nine-year-old was asked to testify, on record, about attacking his foster mother -- allegations, of course, he truthfully denied. However, the agent overseeing his case didn’t believe him, so in the group home he stayed. Forced to grow a thick skin, Jake learned that the only way not to get hurt was to burn through people before they’d attempt to burn him. He became involved in numerous fights, often sporting scraped knuckles, black eyes, split lips. Because of this, he was moved from the group home to another foster care situation when he was 12, after his social worker finally deemed him “unfit for group life.” At his subsequent foster homes, however, Jake never lasted long -- being without a real family led to teasing, to threats of harm, and... well. He learned not to let people push him around.

After being suspended from school for breaking another kid’s nose and arm, Jake entered school-mandated anger management classes. He completed his GED through online courses, moved again from group home to group home with stricter, more militant rules. In the anger management courses and meetings, Jake rekindled his love for art.

One of Jake’s few friends from foster care reached out to him about a trip to California when they turned 18 and were finally out of the system. They road tripped from Colorado, where they’d both ended up. On a whim, Jake auditioned for the role of Charlie Taylor in Zenith’s Suburbia. It was more of a joke than anything, but just before they were about to leave California a week later, Jake got a call saying he’d received the role. So he scrounged up enough money from his savings to buy a small studio apartment in Hollywood and began living life as an actor.

The fame has been interesting for him. He’s always been charismatic, but due to his childhood/teen years, negative press advances put him on edge. He’s come close to smacking paparazzi a few times for getting too close, but so far he’s been in the clear. Still has a short fuse, though.

Recently he upgraded to a larger loft apartment, designating the largest room to be a studio where he paints, sketches, and creates regularly. It’s a hobby for him more than recognition, but a few of his paintings have been sold and circulated.

He loves cinnamon rolls? His fave breakfast in the history of ever, I swear. He’ll never admit it, but it’s because that’s what he’d always have with his first foster family on Sunday mornings, before things went to shit and he, well... went through hell and back.

Um like I don’t wanna make a big deal out of this bUT! HEHASANADORABLETEXANACCENT. <3

Loves hugs. 99.99% chance he will hug you unless you attempt to slight his honor.

Allergic to pet dander? He gets all sniffly and his eyes get itchy. Not anything a Benadryl won’t fix, so.... Yes. He will still snuggle with your dog. He’ll just be sniffling a lot later.

~~~~ [Insert Southern charm here] ~~~~ (I’m still not over it) He doesn’t say howdy but he does say y’all. Obviously his character on the show doesn’t have it though so a lot of times on set he’ll speak with a plain, blank slate American accent. But once he’s off set? Southern charmer. At the bars, people eat it up. This ain’t his first rodeo. (Tbh I don’t even think that fits, I just wanted to say it... @me please stop.)

Wanted Connections:

People he met along the way as he hopped from group home to foster home, etc. I feel this this would’ve taken him all around the Midwest. 

That friend from foster care!! One of the very few people he kept around from his past, honestly.

Someone who gets under his skin. Jake tries very hard not to lash out but this person really pushes his buttons.

Squad!!! He’s like, really charismatic most of the time? Sociable. Especially now, since the fame’s more of a chill fact of life.

PR relationship. Jake is good at separating his personal life from his professional life, but it’d be cool if we could fuck with that a little. Cause some #drama.

Coffeeshop/thrift shop/general excursion pals. I imagine Jake’s really into the #aesthetic of photographs, even though painting/sketching is his main thing? So someone who’s willing to scope out dope photoshoot places and pose 15 billion times for him -- and vice versa.

But yes that is the basic rundown!! I whipped this up so fast so pls don’t !me. @ :”) 

If you wanna plot with this lil beb ( or any of my other bebs tbh ) smash that like !!11!111! Am I a YouTuber yet? Subscribe to my channel and let me know if you’d like me to make more videos like this in the future! :O If we get to 200,000 likes maybe I’ll make a sequel duN DUN DUNNNN. ( Jk we all know I will because my self-restraint is trash and I already have a Colin Ford in mind named Dakota. #LINCISTRASH2kALWAYS )

<3 Ily all! xoxo Gossip Linc 💋