#911: protective firefam

[scottishaccentsareawesome]

Tommy(opens his door to see Chimney):...Chim! Chimney: I'm here purely on business, Tommy, as a representative of Firehouse 118, as well as Maddie Buckley. Tommy: What? Chimney: Word is, that you've started dating one Evan Buckley. Tommy: I have - am - yes. Chimney: OK, then. [Chimney lifts up a large, FULL binder and presents it to Tommy]...Here's everything you need to know. Allergies, likes, dislikes, unhealthy hang-ups, what to do when he gets in his "Sad Puppy" Mood, how to handle him in his "Excited Zoomies" Mood, how to handle him when he's pissed off, facts about his family - and yes, those two do tend to coincide - Tommy: Chimney - Chimney: - As well as written and signed statements from nearly everyone in his life - including one from Jee-Yun, whose statement I typed out, but she signed in crayon - that they will hunt you down and kill you if you hurt him in any way. Tommy(takes the binder): OK...? Chimney(stares at him for another moment, then smiles): - Happy for you, dude! {claps Tommy on the shoulder, then turns and leaves]

[1-800-ur-cyber-slxtt]

Showers

summary: a passing comment and shared showers lead to a hard time for the plus size reader, luckily she has Evan Buckley...

pairing: Evan "Buck" Buckley x plus size/insecure fem!reader

warnings: body insecurities, fluff (no smut), mentions of body shaming, protective Buck & Eddie, implied no prior established relationship.

notes: Buck can be whoever you want him to be e.g bestfriend, boyfriend.

posted: ao3 (bio)

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This particular afternoon the team had come back especially dirty, all members requiring a nice hot shower and a decent scrub to rid their bodies of all that dirt and blood. 

All would be fine if I wasn’t so insecure of my body. Gender-specific shower and changing rooms may have helped but it wouldn’t have defeated the issue nor made me feel that much more comfortable. 

I hugged my arms around my chest loosely as I stood outside the door to the shower room, debating on going in and having that much-needed shower or waiting until everyone was done and risking going to more calls dirty and disgusting.

Buck eyed me from his locker, he’d picked up on my unease from an incident on call. I’d been having a good day until a patient made a passing comment about my body. Buck and Eddie being the only ones who heard were quick to defend but the damage was already done. 

I must have been standing there for a long time because Bobby was already cleaned up and dressed and with Chim and Eddie entering back into the changing room with towels around their waists it left only Hen still showering and Buck and I. 

Showers didn’t take long as we had to be ready in case a call came through, but time didn’t matter when it came to how I felt about my body.

Buck closed his locker and made his way to the entrance of the showers. He stops still in front of me. “You coming, Y/n/n? No offence but you kind of stink, not unlike me.”, he offers me a sympathetic and playful smile. 

I stifle a chuckle, though still displeased with the idea, I follow him in. We pass Hen who smiles at us before leaving. 

Buck turns and strips himself of his shirt, discarding it on the bench that lines the wall opposite the showers. He pauses and turns around to face me when he notices I haven’t moved from where I’m standing. 

I feel awkward, at a loss of what to do. A constant debate in my mind of what I should do and what I want to do. 

“Y/n.”, he says, moving closer to me. Gently he places his hands on my shoulders. “Is this about what happened earlier?”

I look him in the eyes nervously before looking away. Tears brink in my eyes, my bottom lip quivering. I raise my hand to my mouth, anxiously biting at my nails in a subconscious effort to distract myself. 

Carefully as though I may break, Buck lowers my arm and engulfs me in a tight hug. It’s now that tears start falling, soft sobs into the firm chest of the man hugging me. His hand strokes my hair, “Shh, sweetheart.”, he soothes. 

“You have nothing to be embarrassed about, especially when it comes to us.”, he says regarding the rest of the crew. “No one here is going to judge you and in the extremely unlikely scenario that they did, they’d have me to deal with.”

My sobs quiet down, Buck places a light kiss on my forehead and pulls away. “C’mon, let’s get you showered.”, his voice is gentle and caring and provides me a comfort in which I much so needed. His thumb swipes runny mascara from my cheek and he smiles down at me affectionately, a smile I can’t help but force myself to think could be amused and judging.

I nod my head, “Okay.” My voice comes out low and hoarse as I push the idea of Buck judging me out of my head. 

Buck walks over to the light switch and flicks it off. The room is left dim but not in complete darkness as daylight pours in from small windows near the ceiling. 

Behind me his fingertips grab onto the hem of my shirt, resting there. “Is this okay?”, he murmurs and gestures to lifting it. 

“Yeah.”, I say quietly with a nod. He lifts the navy shirt over my head and throws it onto his. Buck scoops my hair up and moves it over my shoulder out of the way. 

Buck pauses, “If you get uncomfortable tell me and I’ll stop.��� 

Goosebumps ripple along my skin at the feeling of the cold air and his touch. His fingers hook under the clasp of my bra, undoing it and letting it slide off my arms.

I step away from Buck and make sure to stay facing away from him, “I’ve got the rest.”

I wait until Buck is fully undressed and under the water. Steam rises as the hot water hits the tiled floor and Bucks large muscular back. 

Once completely unclothed I join him, walking in front of him slowly and making minimal eye contact. My arms once again crossed over my chest. 

Buck’s hair is drenched along with his face and body. The hot water helps ease my nerves and wash away the tension, our skin turning red at the temperature. The dirt and grime runs off our bodies, brown and red flowing down the drain until eventually it’s clear. 

Behind me, Buck squirts some shampoo into his hand and runs it through the roots of my hair and massages it into my scalp. Our bodies may both be bare and very close but the intimate experience stays innocent.

 Under the stream of water Buck rakes his hands through my hair and washes out the soapy substance before adding conditioner and shifting my hair over my shoulder. He lays a kiss on the shoulder without hair, staying there for a moment. Buck’s so overcome with the feeling of longing, longing that I could love myself and see myself just as he does. And I wish for that too, I really do. 

We don’t talk but we don’t need to, the silence is comfortable and I eventually start to fully unwind. 

The blonde behind me rubs my shoulders a few times before lathering soap onto his hands. 

His hands innocently wander over the curves and crevices of my back. I close my eyes and I relish in the feeling of being able to exist without judgement even if it’s only with one person or only in this one moment. 

 Buck’s hands travel down the length of my arms. I suck in a deep breath as I know it’s time to turn around. 

“Y/n.”, he says at my hesitation. Slowly I turn, water rinsing the soap from my back and the conditioner from my hair. 

I don’t look at his face until his hand cups my jaw and gently forces it up so my eyes lock with his. 

“Hey, we’re already here. Nothing is changing, I’m not going to suddenly be disgusted by you or whatever you think is going to happen, sweetheart.”, Buck professes. 

I find myself at a loss of words, no one has treated me just how Buck does. “It’s just hard to believe, Buck.”, I reply looking at him sheepishly. 

He nods his head in understanding, “I know, but you have to try.”

Buck reaches for the soap again but gets interrupted by the loud sound of the bell ringing. He lets out a sigh, not annoyed that he didn’t get to properly wash himself but rather at the fact he felt like he failed at trying to make the woman most important to him see how wrong she was about her feelings towards her body.

We both hurriedly dry off and pull on our clothes, being forced to forget prior events. 

As we go throughout the rest of the day I can’t help but get flustered when I look at Buck or when sitting in the fire engine and his thigh brushes against mine.

I never thought I’d wish to be back, naked, in front of Evan Buckley. 

[typicalopposite]

Ok so in all honesty I’m hoping the look Buck’s mom gave after seeing him and Tommy was nothing more than her old brain trying to understand and process what she was seeing…

I really hope if his parents mention Tommy anytime soon on the show the depth of angst is so shallow it doesn’t even faze Buck… maybe even surprises him a little that it goes so well. Because we don’t have much time left with Buck this season and even less with Tommy and I want it to be so happy and easy for them

however… HOWEVER

in fic format.

I am devouring the deep angst post coming out fics. I need more of them. I crave more of them😀

Because… there’s a because I’m not just sadistic ok. I need Bucks tribe to stand up to his parents for him. I need MADDIE to stand up to their parents for him. I need Chimney and Bobby and Hen and Eddie… I NEED CHRISSSS TO STAND UP TO THE BUCKLEY PARENTS FOR HIM…. I NEED THE NURSES AND- AND SOME RANDOM PATIENT DOWN THE HALL TO STAND UP FOR HIM

YALL *feral noises* I NEED TOMMY TO STAND UP TO MARGARET AND PHILIP BUCKLEY FOR THIS MAN!!!

I know there’s already quite a few out there… but I need more! I need all the fics of Buck’s people showing up for him!

Because his parents just were (are if you are petty like me and cannot forgive and forget) so terrible and they got let off so easy… so soooo easy! And it’s not fair!

And so I (ok maybe it is a little sadistically) want even more angst from them so it can be fixed with love from everyone else

Ya know?

[buddierecs]

jealous!eddie diaz buddie fics

all mature rating!!! make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

eddie diaz vs the pta agenda by: mmtion "really, eddie doesn’t care that the pta aren’t his biggest fan. he knows he misses too many meetings, and it’s not like he’s best friends with any of the other parents. it doesn’t affect christopher, so it doesn’t bother him. he’ll pay for the annual fundraising mugs and consider his duty done. but then buck picks christopher up from a class trip and it all goes to hell. like, of course buck is everyone’s dream guy. he’s responsible with kids, and kind, and funny and interesting and hot to touch. that’s obvious. but now eddie’s fighting to keep the pta moms, teachers, and dads, all off an unsuspecting and tempting buck. because eddie is a good friend. right?" word count: 19k important tags: idiots in love, oblivious!eddie diaz ripples all the way down by: iriswests "christopher partakes in some parent trapping" word count: 57k important tags: jealous!evan buckley, slow burn, miscommunication, happy ending a thousand ways to say i hate you by: morganofthefairies "five times eddie buys taylor fuck-you flowers, and one time he doesn't need to" word count: 8k important tags: 5+1 things, petty!eddie diaz, double dates, eddie/ana, buck/taylor, ana flores bashing, pining, ableism let me roll it to you by: woodchoc_magnum "in which eddie starts dating ana and buck starts dating around; eddie does not cope that well with change, buck is oblivious and everyone else thinks they're a pair of idiots." word count: 22k important tags: idiots in love, mutual pining, angst, humor, worried firefam i'm not the guy you're taking home by: woodchoc_magnum "in which buck discovers the wonders of bisexuality and eddie spends the entire fic pining for him in a big bad way." word count: 63k important tags: pining, oblivious!evan buckley, friends with benefits, team as family, coming out, angst, getting together did you know that my dreams, they're all the same by: sourwolfseblaine "tk visits los angeles to forget about his break up with carlos, buck needs to forget about his painful (what he thinks is unrequited) feelings for eddie. buck thought him and tk becoming rebound buddies would solve their problem, at least for one night, but it only makes it more complicated for him." word count: 7k important tags: 911 lone star, rebounds, pining, first kiss, love confessions, getting together, light angst this is josh, what's your emergency? by: eightpackdiaz "josh knew eddie was into buck way before eddie realised it himself" word count: 6.2k important tags: eddie & josh friendship, gay disaster!eddie diaz, getting together, feelings realisation, kissing eddie diaz vs garfield the cat by: sonayesul "buck brings home a cat one day and he and christopher love her. however, eddie doesn't and swears the cat is trying to steal buck from him." word count: 4k important tags: established relationship, crack, fluff, mild hurt/comfort, domestic fluff traded by: princessfbi "eddie wasn't trying to go viral. he just wanted to trade his jersey. but then something called booktok got involved." word count: 23k important tags: hocky au, bartender!eddie diaz, hockey player!evan buckley, social media, protective!eddie diaz, possessive!eddie diaz, mutual pining, getting together in my heart i wanted more by: woodchoc_magnum "set post-season 5, Episode 4 and 5 - in which buck and taylor's relationship is slowly crumbling, eddie has some big realisations about his sexuality, and true feelings are revealed." word count: 47k important tags: faling in love, getting together, team as family, mutual pining, protective!eddie diaz, panic attacks, first kiss let me fix it for you by: smilingbuckley "5 times eddie fixes or builds something for buck + 1 time buck thanks him for it (... sort of)" word count: 10k important tags: 5+1 things, getting together, eventual smut, mutual pining, fluff, idiots in love

[moonstonediaz]

idk my whole stance on the “will they/won’t they” in regards to buddie canon is just. it’s loud, it’s oddly ironic, that these are the only two main’s on the show that are S I N G L E. still! in season sex six! that their relationship statuses have basically run parallel to each other, that they keep trying and failing to find a romantic partner. so let’s look at the other side of the coin. what’s the other option? introducing yet again brand new love interests for both buck and eddie and having these people be their endgame relationships?

eddie? who has always held his cards close to his chest, is extremely protective over his son and who he gets close to, who has already tried dating the seemingly perfect woman for him and his son?

buck? who’s going to be a harder sell than ever now that he knows not to settle? who’s going to be looking for someone that accepts him just as he is, someone that compliments him perfectly, who accepts his relationships with the firefam, with chris and eddie, without complaint?

if this were season 2, 3, or hell, even season 4, i’d say yeah maybe we have time for all that. but we’re nearing the end of season SIX and there have been no new love interests brought in. and i don’t foresee 911 being a show that runs for 20+ seasons. i mean it could i guess but like. we’re in it. the meat of the sandwich. narratively, i don’t see it making sense for them to spend precious time cultivating new endgame relationships for the two of them. they’d likely have to run them at the same time, parallel to each other. yet again. which would be a tell in its own right that they were actively avoiding buddie canon.

i’m not saying they absolutely won’t do that, i have no idea what their actual plans are. i’m just saying they’re boxing themselves into a corner. a great big rainbow-filled flaming gay corner.

[satashiiwrites]

Choices and Regrets, Epilogue: Aftershocks (complete)

It’s finally done. I don’t know what to do with myself now.

I think I’m going to have a shot of whiskey (aka Writer’s Tears).

Title: Choices and Regrets Fandom: 911, partial fusion of Dark Matter (TV show/Blake Crouch Novel)

Relationship: Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz/Evan Buckley, and then add a third Buck (Navy Seal! Buck) for some extra spice. Oh and there’s some HenRen.

Warnings: Alternative Universe, canon typical violence, identity fraud which leads to some iffy issues with consent as it’s not who the person thinks it is that they’re sleeping with, kidnapping, character death (not our versions of Buck, Eddie or Christopher and extended firefam), multiple universes and travel between them, butterfly effect, threesome, foursome, Satashii stopped keeping track of who’s hand is where in the sex scenes, oral sex, rimming, anal sex, look…. It’s a sci-fi thriller. We’re going to hand wave all the science and medical stuff and just go with it for the sake of plot. Navy Seal Evan Buckley. Doppelgänger problems (aka there’s an Evil Buck), character bashing (I made Daniel evil too). A dash of mortal peril and fighting your way free…. Means someone is going to get shot. Angst. All the Angst. It gets dark before it gets better. Chapters have specific warnings.

Word Count: 109k

Rating: Explicit (shocker I know)

Summary: If you could go back and change the choices in your life, would you? Would you love the same people, go on the same vacations, have the same career? Or would you have regrets?

After the lightning strike, an unexpected visitor makes Buck question all the choices he’s ever made. From dropping out of the Seals to never making a move on Eddie because the time hasn’t been right. He’s going to get an up close and personal look at what could have been because another version of Buck is focused on taking his choices away from him—including Eddie and Christopher Diaz.

Buck being hit by lightning isn’t what changes things for them. It takes several weeks and something else to shift the mountain of feelings they’ve both been repressing for years to finally break free and allow them both to start moving as everything around them accelerates. 

The avalanche almost kills them both.  

Or maybe it does. 

In this universe, though, it starts on an innocuous Wednesday evening. 

The trauma of having Buck’s heart stop for three minutes and seventeen seconds has caused them both to spend an inordinate amount of time navel-gazing and thinking about their life. Eddie’s protective hackles are still raised, and it’s been weeks, while Buck is starting to feel stifled under his family’s loving attention. 

The lightning strike isn’t the event that causes the unacknowledged friendship stalemate they’ve dug themselves into to fracture. Both of them are too afraid of losing the other to recognize aloud that each other is the most important person in their lives other than their kid. 

Buck’s choice to linger around Eddie and Christopher, of all his family, is about more than comfort. The Diaz house is his safe haven; Eddie will always have his back, and he has Eddie’s.  

It’s the way they are. The way they’ll always be, Buck thinks. His friendship with Eddie is life-defining. Buck can’t imagine his life without Eddie by his side like it’d been in the coma dream. He never wants to be without Eddie again, and Eddie’s absence from the dream has kept him up thinking at night ever since he awoke from his coma. 

It’s not pining if you don’t admit to it, right? You can be so willfully blind to what’s in front of you that you make choices that seem bizarre in retrospect and have your friends and family doubting your mental capacity. Buck clings to Eddie, looking first to him for so long that he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it anymore, much to the frustration of everyone around him. 

Eddie though…. Eddie knows he loves Buck with everything in his soul. Thanks, Frank, for dragging that truth out after he hit rock bottom and could only cling to Buck as his emotions tossed him about like a ship in a hurricane. Buck is the anchor of his sanity. He knows that he’ll ruin the best relationship he’s ever had by wanting too much and needing too much, despite his therapist constantly giving him judgmental looks for declining to talk to Buck about his feelings.  

He’ll take whatever Buck can give him, which must be enough. It’s enough to have Buck in his life, and he can’t risk that—not when he also has Christopher to think of. 

The night the balance tips, the fractures widen, and set off the avalanche of cascading consequences is just another Wednesday night dinner together at the Diaz house.  

The thing about avalanches? The warning signs can all be there, but it only takes seconds to set it off by accident, and you never know when it will happen. 

When is enough, enough?  

Or, does someone set it off on purpose, wanting to change the status quo?

Read completed fic here on AO3

[sunflowerdigs]

I'm fundamentally uninterested in any racism narrative that doesn't tackle racism's systemic nature and instead turns it into a personality flaw in a single individual. Especially because the latter tends to also inevitably center a white savior narrative in order to avoid really dealing with the experiences of a black protagonist surrounded by white characters (I'm looking at you, Stranger Things).

911 isn't always perfect, but I knew that I was going to finish the series when I saw Hen Begins, because Hen's experience of workplace racial discrimination perfectly captured it's systemic nature. All of the white firefighters stood against her even though they knew that Gerrard was a pos lunatic because it benefited them to do so. If it's not broke, don't fix it - for the white firefighters, a racist system worked, so they had no interest in changing it and actively protected it by hazing Hen and trying to get her to quit.

Racism isn't really perpetuated by extremists, it's perpetuated by the moderate majority who stay silent and don't challenge it in part because they're afraid of a world in which they don't benefit from it. That's why all of the firefighters from Gerrard's era had to leave before the 118 could truly become the firefam. Not because they were all racist monsters but because racism is a team sport and they were all Team Gerrard. It's an acknowledgement of the fact that Chim and Hen weren't fighting individuals, they were (and still are!!) fighting a system that did not want them to succeed.

And that's why I really want to see Chim and Hen offensively challenge Gerrard in s8 by taking the LAFD as a whole to court because they can't end Gerrard by just getting rid of Gerrard (as has been shown us by Gerrard's reinstatement), they really need to challenge the entire system that supports him to wipe him out for good.

[thewolvesof1998]

get to know your fic writer + WIP Snippet

Tagged by @jesuisici33 @hippolotamus @your-catfish-friend 

When did you post your first ever fanfic?

God, I definitely posted 1D fics on Wattpad back in the day, probably in 2013 but I started posting again only in June of this year. 

First character(s) you wrote for:

It was probably something 1D related either Larry or an OC/Harry Styles

Main character(s) you’re currently writing for:

Buck and Eddie of course. 

Character(s) you haven’t written about before but plan on writing about soon:

Hmmm I don’t have anything planned, I’m just following the hyperfixation but probably someone from the 911 world, maybe Ravi or May?

Fandom(s) you’re currently writing for:

9-1-1

Platonic pairing(s) you currently write for:

Buck and Chris- you can't really avoid Buck as Chris's other parent when writing Buddie. Bobby and Buck- another father-and-son relationship. Eddie and Sophia- the Diaz siblings. The entire firefam I suppose.

Romantic pairing(s) you currently write for:

Buck/Eddie

Your top 3 tags on AO3 (if you post your works on AO3):

Not Beta Read, One Shot and Pre-Relationship Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz 

Your current platform where you post your works:

AO3

Snippet of the wip you’re currently working on:

I haven't written in weeks but the inspiration hit tonight so here a bit from a new wip- something for Halloween:

Eddie could hear the creak of the tree outside as the wind tumbled through its branches, someone calling for their dog a few doors down and a motorcycle roaring down the street adjacent to his. He could also hear Buck’s heartbeat, its usual slow and steady thump, thump, thump. Normally he would hear Christopher's soft breaths and fluttering heartbeat from the room down the hall but the house is empty tonight.  He can still taste the tequila from the shots they’d decided were a good idea after finishing their usual six pack. The alcohol warming his stomach, making his limbs feel like they belonged to someone else. Without thinking about it, they place themselves on Buck’s broad chest, his skin a contrast to the dark blue button-up Buck decided to wear tonight. Eddie can feel the sharp intake of breath beneath them and his eyes drag themselves up to Buck’s face. His usually pale skin is flushed ever so slightly, confusion dragging his eyebrows together in a look that would be comical if Eddie wasn’t so damn in love with him.  “Eds?” Buck whispers, so quiet that if it weren’t for his enhanced hearing he wouldn’t have heard it. Eddie doesn’t respond, not verbally at least, he just steps in closer, placing his forehead on Buck’s shoulder, face tucked into his neck. Buck’s hands automatically come up to rest on his arms and Eddie thinks just for a moment that he’s going to push him away but instead, Buck’s fingers curl around his biceps, holding him tightly.  Eddie breathes in, taking in Buck’s scent, citrus, honeycomb and sunshine on snow, it’s just as intoxicating as the alcohol. He’s nuzzling into Buck’s neck chasing that scent before he can stop himself. Buck shudders but doesn’t pull away instead, he bares his neck and tries to relax despite the vulnerable position. Buck has to know he’s not going to hurt him, Eddie could never hurt him.  He opens his mouth and sucks in a breath, “Buck…” his name is as sweet as the taste of him on Eddie’s tongue. It so distracting that he forgets what he is going to say and instead, his hands slide up and one around Buck’s neck and into his hair, using the grip to tilt his head so Eddie has better access. Buck gasps, his fingers digging in painfully before relaxing again but Eddie barely registers it, drowning in Buck’s scent until it was just Buck and only him.  Eddie’s teeth and claws lengthen as the primal need takes control, he manages to loosen his grip enough to avoid piercing Buck, the need to protect is just as strong as the need to mark and claim. 

Tagging:

@wikiangela​ @wildlife4life ​ @eddiebabygirldiaz ​ @disasterbuckdiaz @spotsandsocks @try-set-me-on-fire @bekkachaos @buddierights @forthewolves @911-on-abc @shitouttabuck @911onabc @exhuastedpigeon @eddiediaztho @loserdiaz @ladydorian05 @watchyourbuck @king-buckley @chaoticgremlinwholikescheese @fortheloveofbuddie @sammy-souffle @steadfastsaturnsrings @mangacat201 @theotherbuckley @hoodie-buck @eowon @rainbow-nerdss @nmcggg @pirrusstuff

[scottishaccentsareawesome]

Buck(answering a call from Tommy):...Hey, babe! Tommy: I have been getting SO many calls and texts the past few days. Buck: Like spam? Tommy: No, like THREATS! Buck: What?! OK, well, I can call Athena - Tommy: - Athena was one of the threatening calls! Buck: What? Tommy: Plus Bobby, Hen, your sister, Chimney, Eddie, Hen's wife, Eddie's grandmother, Christopher - they're all threatening me with grievous bodily harm if I hurt you in any way! Buck:...Awww..... Tommy: Evan, I'm seriously a little freaked out, here! Buck: No, I know, and I'll talk to them, it's just - it's so sweet...! Tommy: Evan, I just got another text from Karen Wilson with very dangerous-looking emojis. Buck: OK, I'll talk to them.

[daniwib]

Fic Writing Review 2023

Words and fics

• 281,412 words published to ao3

• approx. 150,000 more unpublished (unfinished WIP’s)

• 2 fandoms (911 & 911 Lonestar)

• Most recent drop: Night at the (Wax) Museum – an utterly cursed piece of work that is virtually unreadable. Seriously. I dare you to try. I wrote this for a guess-the-writer event and made it so unrecognisable as my own work that virtually no one read it at all. It’s a fun story and I hope that more people will read the grammatically correct version that I’ll be posting hopefully today.  

• Longest fic in 2023: empty, broken, lonely, hoping at 44k (Buck and Christopher are presumed dead when Buck’s building burns down) This is one of my favourites this year.

Top 2023 fics by kudos

• empty, broken, lonely, hoping (Buck and Christopher are presumed dead when Buck’s building burns down). I really like this one and am quite proud of it. One of my favourites I’ve written this year.

• Losing Hope (Buck gets pregnant right before the lawsuit but loses the baby). Huh. This surprised me. I never thought I’d write mpreg or lawsuit fic OR that it would be one of my highest kudos’d fic this year. How bizarre!

Upcoming events and projects for 2024

Gah this is scary, I have so many.

Reluctant Werewolf crack – I really need to sit down and finish the last chapter of this. It’s about half done.

Coronation crack – likewise. I got blocked when RWRB was released and featured a polo scene very similar to what I was planning for Buddie in England and haven’t been able to get back to it since. I think I’ll scrap that chapter and just finish it off. I loathe having unfinished wip’s partly posted, it does my head in.

Big werewolf AU – featuring all my favourite tropes of kidnapped Buck, worried Eddie, Buck whump and Eddie whump too. I started it in January 2023. It’s fully plotted and maybe 2/3’s written at around 70k.

Navy Seal Buck – there’s something so fun about secretly bamf! Buck going all out to protect his firefam. He gets whumped during the course of, naturally. Again, started in January 2023, fully plotted and is maybe half done at about 50k-ish.

Angsty Buckley family drama set around the Madney wedding aka the one that will make you all weep. Fully plotted, partly begun.

Kidnapped TK – this one is so big and complex that I’m thinking of turning it into a novel some day. Fully plotted and partially written.

Eddie porn reviewer. Plotted only.

Buck sex worker. Plotted, partially written.

Carla romance novelist gets Buddie together. Plotted, partially written.

Plus the other 90+ ideas in my Ideas folder!

I’m unlikely to get much done before Christmas, too busy with family stuff and am recovering from having to have an emergency appendectomy while also having Influenza A this week. It’s been… rough.

Same for January as hubby and I are going on the first holiday alone together since having kids – Tasmania here we come! I am very glad my surgery didn’t ruin that.

Thank you for the tag @sherlockcrossing  

No pressure tagging: @daughterofscotland  @rogerzsteven @cal-daisies-and-briars @ronordmann and anyone else who wants to share!

Rules: Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. Would rather eat glass than do this? Please don’t eat glass but don’t feel like you have to do this either.

[theclaravoyant]

the family that plays together ~ a 911 firefam fic (Rated T)

AN ~ prompted by @/nerdsgoquack on AO3! (paraphrased; everyone is in the mafia and buck is oblivious)

Prompt #1152 for @/911actions Gotcha For Gaza event. The prompt period is now over, but you can still show your support for a good cause! MASSIVE thank you to the incredible galaxy brain chat members and to the prompter for letting me run wild with appreciation for this badass team and the loyalty they share!

Read on AO3 (~3000wd)

-

the family that plays together

What about this one? Evan Buckley.

Says here he enlisted for the SEALs last year.

Tough kid. Think he can handle it?

Grades were solid. Says here the main thing he struggled with was discipline and following orders.

Ha. Perfect. Nash always did love a rulebreaker.

-

The 118 is famous – notorious even – among the firehouses. There's all kinds of wild stories floating around about them. They once broke up a cockfighting ring. Another time, they stole a helicopter. Between them they've been stabbed, shot, and electrocuted more than any other firehouse this side of Texas, so Buck hears, and maybe it's his lack of self preservation talking, but Buck can't wait to be a part of it. To be personally invited? Terrifying. Even if it is perhaps a dream come true.

“I- I am honoured, sir,” Buck says, deciding and then un-deciding and then re-deciding that he should hold his hand out to be shaken after all as he takes his seat. “You guys are so cool. Like. Hardcore. Honestly. The way the guys at the Academy talk about you, you'd think you were the fucking mafia.”

They've got a long table laid out with all the fixings. Salad, bread and butter, more dressing options than he can poke a stick at and a beautiful, glistening, gigantic roast bird like the family dinners he's always seen on TV. He's absorbed in hunger and joy and disbelief. So maybe he misses the way his new Captain's lips quirk into a smile and his eyes sparkle with something akin to mischief as he passes across a plate. He definitely doesn't notice the way the others all look back at him like a wordless, motionless bite of the lip.

“Is it always like this?” Buck asks, in wonder.

“Yeah,” answers the one they call Chimney. “When Bobby's at the helm, anyway.”

“Welcome to the family, Buck,” says Hen.

Family, Buck thinks. Yeah, he could get used to this.

-

They really are a family. Family secrets and all. Like - Captain Nash has a mysterious notebook he protects with his life and an even more mysterious past. He's sullen and withdrawn around most people, even the 118 at first. But even still there's a trust there; one that inspires them to put their utmost faith in this strange man. Not everyone gives their house key to their work colleague, but Hen has one. Not everyone gets away with throwing their subordinate against a wall, but Bobby does.

“I warned you,” Hen says, once Bobby drops him and walks away. There's no menace in it though; more exasperation at his insistence on disregarding her. She looks him up and down with concern all the same. “You alright?”

Aside from a very visceral, heart-pounding reminder that he's the new kid here and they'll all sell him out for Bobby at the drop of a hat, Buck is fine. So he nods. She did warn him, after all, about the book.

-

That won't be the last time Buck pisses Hen off or ignores her orders, but it's not out of a lack of appreciation. He's just an idiot, as the team is increasingly liberal with reminding him, and he likes to push the Big Red Button for himself. Honestly though, he admires Hen. She's impressive. Bright. Passionate. She's decisive too, and can even be ruthless at times: rumour has it she set up her ex to be sent back to prison not too long ago and damn, Buck thinks. That's hardcore.

Hen has been rising through the ranks for years, and it's no secret that now she's top of the list to take over the house once Bobby retires. Or dies – unless they mean something else by the way they only half-jokingly refer to it as moving to the old farm upstate. It pains Buck to think of Bobby ever leaving, but it has to be said that if anyone has to take his place, Hen has the brains and the heart for it. The respect of her team, certainly. The courage. The guts.

“I mean, literally the guts,” Buck says, and gestures a big beating heart with his hands. “She literally stuck her hand right in there. Like. Her whole arm. It was some Indiana Jones Temple of Doom shit.”

Even Taylor, famously dogged skeptic and ever unimpressed, allows her eyes to go a little wide at that.

“She was pretty proud of it, honestly,” he finishes.

“She should be.”

“I could probably get you an interview, if you want.”

Taylor smirks. “I don't know about that.”

She's right in the end. The promise of an exclusive story sours and falls by the wayside after Taylor runs a story, and Hen and Chimney get attacked. Their former colleague - a traitor, an Angel of Death - holds them hostage. Apparently Hen had been building a case against him and he's determined to make her pay for it. Apparently the best way to do that is to go after Chim. It's something that would have been saved for Karen in the movies – not that Buck isn't infinitely, impossibly grateful that it wasn't. But still. It's all the more evidence of the strength of this family, not to mention Jonah's jealousy at being booted back outside of it, that Chim's the one he chose to take, to hurt, to hurt her.

Jonah shocks the life out of Chim not once, but twice, before he and Hen manage to take him down with his own weaponised defibrillator. Jonah only just makes it into police custody. Somehow it's Athena's, even though she and Hen are best friends and even though Athena herself has just given Buck a(nother) lecture about conflicts of interest. He's always found it funny when she talks to him like that. Like she's not about to bust down walls for any of these guys. Like if she'd been in that room, she wouldn't be clinging to Hen covered in blood and tears like Chim is now, protesting that she should get priority on the gurney instead. It's how a family should be, in Buck's opinion, rules be damned. You gotta do what you gotta do.

(He's on the same wavelength when it comes to that. Maybe that's how they get away with it for so long).

-

Chimney is another mystery all his own. Nobody will explain to Buck where the name comes from, not even the man himself. All he's gathered so far is that it's definitely so much more tantalisingly badass than there were three Howards in my class. But - Buck figures - that's Chim's business. He definitely does not pester Bobby and Hen and later, his own sister for the story. He's not dying to know so much it keeps him up at night. Because he's a professional and Chim is his colleague. Albeit his colleague who sat on top of his dead body in an ambulance and didn't stop CPR the whole way to the hospital. His colleague who nearly got stabbed to death by his sister's abusive ex. His brother in law, or at least as good as. His brother in arms, for sure.

Chim has another name to add to his collection these days, and that one is no mystery to Buck. It's not nearly as mysterious as 'Chimney' even to the uninitiated: Rebar, Rebar Skull, Rebar Head. Not their most creative. But the fact that Chim got a piece of rebar through his brain and survived and more importantly, that it's not even the most supremely badass thing that's ever happened to him drives Buck up the wall. He's fascinating. If Buck had the patience he might just make him sit down and write up a whole book. Then again, he does kind of enjoy the tidbits of it all; the gradual unravelling of Chimney Han Lore via the team, and Tommy, and Maddie. Even if he can never be sure when one of them is fucking with him.

(Which. Well. They are. But he doesn't know that yet).

Once or twice they've even joked about turning Chim's life into an action movie. Damn, Chim would love that. And increasingly, Buck thinks it would honestly be fitting. The thing would need to be serialised to capture what Buck actually gets to see Chimney do over the years. There's the Jonah thing of course, and the rebar thing, but also the time when the bridge drops out from under all of them and Chim all but operates on his own spleen dangling at 180 degrees in the back of the ambulance. Or when he undertakes a lone wolf of a road trip with his daughter and everything he owns in the world to find Maddie no matter how long it takes or what awaits him at the end of it. Hello, Liam Neeson? Chimney Han is calling.

(For the record though, Chim is currently favouring Lee Byung-Hun for the role of himself.)

-

It's not just Chimney either, though. Nicknames are very much a thing at the 118. More so than any other firehouse. They get Donato, Kinard, Mehta. Mostly last names; pretty standard. Meanwhile, the 118 are:

Hen – or occasionally Cap or Wilson if needs must, but never, on pain of death, Buck has discovered, 'Henrietta'.

Howard Howie Chim Chimney Rebar Han ??

Cap or Bobby

Buck (duh)

and, uh, New Guy. Who is insisting that he go by Eddie, but it's not quite nick-namey enough for Buck. Nothing he does is good enough for Buck at first though, to be fair, and he feels the same New Kid In My Family prickle at the back of his neck they all must have done when he came along. Eddie doesn't know the rules of the game yet. Not as far as Buck's concerned.

(He does, though. That's why he's here. And he doesn't quite get why nobody's told Buck, but maybe it's for the same reason he can't bring himself to burst the bubble either. Buck's family, and maybe that's enough. Maybe he doesn't need to see what Eddie's seen. Maybe he doesn't need to know that once, Eddie punched a guy's nose so hard he broke it up into his brain and just about killed him. When he finds out, Buck stands by him anway. That's just who Buck is when it comes to family.)

Between a stubborn Eddie and a not-actually-as-thick-as-he-is-jealous Buck it doesn't take long for him to flip through a few nicknames that never stick - GI. G-man. Sarge. Even Diaz. Never Diaz. That, Buck can appreciate at least. He doesn't even know why he's so desperate for Eddie to accept a nickname, honestly. Maybe because his parents – his biological ones – hate them so much and his team – dare he say his real family – just embrace them. Thrive in them, even. It feels like getting one is like being christened: a good faith gesture to show, to prove he's part of the family. But Eddie insists, and eventually, Buck concedes that Bobby's technically a nickname too, so he'll allow it. (They all laugh; as if it's up to him).

Plus. There isn't much higher of a good faith gesture than to climb into the back of an ambulance with a man he's just met and put their lives on the line together. This is just how Buck is. It's just how the 118 is. It's how Eddie is too – in fact, he might even be more like some of them than Buck had first thought. He's already been shot a couple times and nearly killed in a helicopter crash, but that's practically a pre-requisite for the 118. It's not every man who can have a whole ambulance blow itself to smithereens just across the street and barely bat an eyelid. Even Bobby flinches at that one, before he gives Eddie The Nod.

Buck holds his hand out with a smile, and Eddie shakes it.

“Welcome to the family,”

-

Even when it's not about being unnecessarily mysterious and suspiciously badass, the family Buck has at the 118 is basically the dream. Being more involved in each other's lives than any other firehouse isn't always about sharing their breakdowns at the bottom of the shower or the end of the bed with a baseball bat. They share their victories; birthdays, proposals, graduation, sobriety. They share humour too, even if it is a bit dark and twisted. Buck never thought he'd be standing at the bottom of a building chanting for a potential suicide to jump, but here they are. They don't mean it. It's just been a long day and they're frustrated. It's normal firefighter stuff, the morbid humour. Isn't it?

There's more than that, that's not quite normal. Like, Hen is a known bookie. She takes bets on everything. How long it'll take before Bobby and Athena give up the charade and admit to being together. How many shifts it'll take before Ravi slips up and says the Q word. Whether the dad on this particular call (a classic affair, with Mister Next Door having fallen from the lattice trying to climb up to the window) will turn out to be the dad after all. She even took bets on how long it would take Buck to realise he's bisexual. It was enough money to buy him a motorcycle, and maybe he should be mad about that, but he's not. It's just Hen. And now he has a motorcycle.

Bobby, too. He says he's from Minnesota - mainly when bragging about how well he can handle the cold, which Buck would almost challenge him on except that he himself had fled for warmer climes as soon as he was able. But the weird thing about Bobby's backstory is that it never quite lines up; how many kids he'd had, when exactly and how he'd broken his back, that kind of stuff. And maybe if Buck didn't have such a good memory it wouldn't matter – none of the others ever seem to pull him up on it, at least – but Bobby can never remember which sport is the Twins and which the Timberwolves and if Buck knows Minnesotans -

“Alright, you got me,” Cap confesses. “I was never much of a linebacker.”

Which is neither of them. Buck frowns.

“Ok, so what were you training for?”

“... Figure skating,” Cap says. “If you must know.”

Hen and Chim come in the next day bearing gifts. Specifically, a larger than life cardboard cutout of a boy who apparently is 10 year old Bobby Nash, dressed head to toe in blue sparkles and with hair so wild it's like something out of Labyrinth.

“Minnesota's state grain is wild rice, by the way,” Bobby says. “It's called manoomin in the Ojibwe language. Been a staple of their food for centuries.”

“Oh, cool! I wonder if California has one,” Buck says, already pulling out his phone.

(He always was a sucker for a change of subject. Maybe that's how they did it. It can't have hurt).

-

Eddie always smiles when Buck talks about Christopher, but especially today. Today he very nearly laughs. He's usually better at schooling his expression, but Buck's passionate, joy-filled overtures and shared gestures weaving stories with his son – like today, they've just finished recounting for him the new Birds of Prey show at the zoo – must be rubbing off on him.

“What?” Buck asks, as Christopher runs to his room to fetch his tablet and continue the deep dive.

“Nothing,” Eddie says. “I'm glad you two had fun. And I think it's cute that you call it 'taking care' of him.”

“Feels weird to call it babysitting,” Buck explains with a shrug.

“I guess,” Eddie concedes. “It's just – where I come from, to take care of someone means something different.”

“You mean in the military?”

Eddie raises an eyebrow. “Sure.”

“Yeah, right. 'Take care of him'.” If Buck notices Eddie's hesitation he doesn't show it. He just laughs and brandishes Christopher's brand new plastic eagle, captured mid-dive, like it's a tommy gun. He puts on the worst Al Pacino impression he can muster. “Say Hello to my Little Friend.”

-

“You know that's not the quote, right?” Chimney corrects. ““It's 'the day my daughter is to be wed', not 'the day of my daughter's wedding'. Classic Mandela Effect.”

Because he's Chim, and his life should most definitely be an action movie, he's just had a bout of viral encephalitis and somehow navigated his way through a whole city, triaged a mass casualty event in fluent Korean and still made it home in time to suck down a Capri-Sun before the day is over.

“No way,” Buck scoffs. “Come on, Maddie, back me up.”

She rolls her eyes. “I think Chim would know.”

(“Maddie! Exnay.” Chim gestures his head at her with wide eyes.)

Buck is already on his phone looking up the correct quote, so he can't see that part. Chim is indeed right. And all it probably means is that Buck is a newbie to films older than he is and Chimney's a buff who enjoys being right. Any other night he would have left it there. Or maybe insisted that Chim be on his team for the next quiz night.

Tonight, he asks with a snort;

“What's that supposed to mean?”

And there's just something about the way Maddie is perched on her husband's hospital bed in a dress and a ring they probably can't afford, looking mortified she's given away a secret. Something about how Chim has been talking about holding the reception at the fancy new italian place where Mr Saffioti owes him a favour. Something about Eddie's high roller poker nights and Ravi owns multiple properties somehow and that deal on his rent came out of literally nowhere and Buck can feel his own jaw begin to slacken.

Welcome to the Family.

“Oh my God,” he breathes. “You couldn't sit on the ending of Sixth Sense for five minutes but this you keep?”

“I'll call Bobby,” Chim resolves. “We've got a lot to talk about.”

[typicalopposite]

You know what would be HILARIOUS (and by hilarious I mean 9-1-1 style humor that is laced with disaster and always ends badly… I’ll get to that in a bit)

What if Buck starts out next season on edge… because he is just as suspicious as the audience about how his own personal life (injury and emotionally wise) has been relatively calm… hell he even got shitfaced drunk at the bachelor party and wasn’t even that hungover the next day (that was Eddie)

so he starts being extra cautious. Maybe even extra superstitious. Because SOMETHING is bound to happen… right? And then during one episode everyone is teasing him on how he’s being ridiculous… even Chimney is like come on man you’re over thinking this… and so he starts to let his guard down. Everyone is probably right. His head has just been clear for the first time in a long time… maybe ever?! That explains it. Having Tommy explains it!

Then they get a call. A bad call. A call they need air support for… and well… yeah, that explains it 👀

[lovecolibri]

SaL anon here bestie and I'm afraid it's time. It was bound to happen at some point during the hiatus, but I feel like now that it's here we should rip the bandaid off and talk about all the reasons the sperm donor arc is some if the stupidest shit I've ever seen. So let's start with what really pissed me off this week which is KR's comments about this storyline. Can't remember the exact quote but something like "Buck needs to be happy with himself, figure out what he wants, it's important to

do that before being happy in a relationship, blah, blah, blah" to which I thought "Why indeed KR this is true which is exactly why WE SHOULD HAVE SEEN THIS HAPPEN LAST YEAR WITH THE WHOLE TAYLOR RELATIONSHIP!!" This is exactly how that story was set up, constantly showing Buck's misery, his half-hearted ily, the chance to realize he needs more than just a person that doesn't leave to be happy. And absolutely nothing came of it. We spent a whole season with this BS only to have it end with no growth for Buck. And NOW you think it's time to address this 🙄🙄🙄??!! Also this leads into my second bitchy observation. Part of the appeal of having a break up growth arc was it was relatable. Maybe we haven't all experienced it but I'd argue most people can relate to the idea of leaving (or being left) a relationship that isn't bad but isn't what you want. Eddie's breakdown arc last season was relatable, not because we all know what PTSD like but we can all appreciate the idea of bottling up hurt and pain because we don't want to face it or keep a brave face for those we love. What exactly am I supposed to be connecting to with this donor BS?? We all don't have an innate desire to have kids, or do a big favor for a sorta friend we once knew. I have a complete emotional disconnect from this storyline and don't see that changing. So next let's talk about how fucking illogical every part of this story is (on a side note I laughed at the fans out-googling the 911 writers on so many things, reminds me of my science RNM  science sin compilations). Anyway, just why would anyone approach their friend they barely keep contact with to do this particular favor (maybe they explained but honestly I've blocked so many of those scenes from my long term memory)?? Why not a close friend (or relative even)? If you're going for emotional distance why not just an anonymous donor? The whole premise feels so contrived. Probably gotta leave it here for now since I'm getting sleepy. But i'm not close to being done (i'm not even done with this one point) so i hope ypu're ready for more of an inbox full later. Feel free to respond to what I do have because honestly bestie, this may take awhile.

My friend, as always your thoughts are perfectly on point! First, YES that growth was what SHOULD have come out of Buck having a relationship where he recognized he was clinging to something that wasn’t fulfilling for him and being the one to call it quits. But with the cheating added into the mix and then the Jonah mess, Buck didn’t end the relationship on “his” terms, he was pushed by her actions and needing to protect his friends. And ya know what? It might have worked if they had it end in 5a, and then spent 5b with Buck figuring out how to be happy with himself and what he wants. Also, what TF was 5x18 if not TWO instances of it being stated what Buck wants?! First with the Maddie “isn’t that what love is?” conversation and then the firefam “someone to have your back” conversation. 

ANYWAY, fine, Buck still needs to learn what the key to happiness is, but please tell me why after how much we had to suffer through that BT mess, we are having yet another season of Buck clinging to something that isn’t right for him and won’t make him happy, just because he thinks doing something to make someone else happy is important even if it hurts him. If the WHOLE point of the BT mess was showing Buck being a “settler” and a “clinger” then why are we right back in the same place with him settling for being a donor not a dad, and clinging on to this couple like he’s going to be ‘fun uncle Buck”? You KNOW that couple isn’t going to want a constant reminder of how they “failed” to make a baby “on their own”, or risk their kid (or Buck) getting too attached. Not to mention how awkward it would be for them to explain their sperm donor just being around all the time. Also what was the point of Hen asking if he could have a child out there and walk away, if he can JUST be a donor and nothing more, if the storyline is showing him constantly acting like he’s going to be fulling involved in this kids life? How is ANY of this helping Buck figure out how to be happy with himself when he’s still putting himself and his needs behind other people’s who are using him for parts? What happened to him figuring out the right “couch” and how to be “at ease” and Lev’s death being something that hit him super hard and made him start thinking about his life? Because all of that got abandoned in favor of this soap opera level pointless “drama”. Thanks, I hate it.

As far as connecting to the storyline, I don’t even think it’s just about some people not wanting kids and therefore not being able to connect, it’s about the way this story is being told. Because you’re right, even people without war-related PTSD could relate or at least emotionally connect to Eddie’s arc. But with Buck, we aren’t given enough/consistent info about his thoughts and feelings to connect with! He seems unsure when he talks to Hen and that “donor not dad” line really seemed to throw him for a loop. So the audience was prepared to see him struggle with this decision a bit, maybe saying “let me think about it” and then an episode or 2 later (after some interactions with a call and/or Eddie/Chris, or Maddie (and maybe Jee) make him re-evaluate things), he tells them no, because he’s realized he can’t just donate and walk away. (Even weighty arcs like the lawsuit and Eddie’s fighting arc only lasted a couple episodes so this would be easy to wrap up within the confines of 6a) Instead he says “yes” immediately without talking to Eddie, Maddie, or Bobby or taking into real account what Hen said. Okay, fine, so he’s said yes, now it’s time for the family history to come into play or a talk with Eddie or Maddie or Bobby right?! Wrong! It’s time to forget about it for a month! Then, when it finally comes back, it’s got two conflicting things happening at once. Thing one: It’s all a big joke! Buck is telling Hen about his masturbation habits (which as everyone has pointed out is actually NOT what you should do which Buck would know if he was doing all that research on what to eat and everything, but that would require the WRITERS to do that research and OPP! Either they didn’t bother, or decided this was “funnier” than the facts 🙄). Buck is getting cock-blocked by the sperm bank! Buck’s firefam is eavesdropping on the reveal when Buck get’s accosted at work and they get caught staring! How funny is that?! (🙄🙄🙄 NOT actually funny but of course it’s never addressed) But then we have thing two. Which is the fact that despite the writing playing this off as a joke, they’re also making sure Buck isn’t telling anyone besides Hen, and makes it clear he doesn’t want her to tell anyone else. Why not? Why would Buck keep this a secret from his sister that he always goes to for a listening ear? From his best friend who isn’t afraid to give him tough talks when he needs them? From his father figure whose advice he respects? The answer if this was in an earlier season with better writing would be that he knows he’s not making the right choice and isn’t ready to confront the truth. But we don’t get any indication of that either! Just Buck desperate to do his donation, apologetic to the couple when he can’t get it done and doubling down on his commitment and excitement to do this for them, and a continued joy in the whole thing, with no indication that anyone is gearing up for a big talk with him. So why was Buck sooo desperate to not let anyone know? The audience is being given two different messages at the same time! Buck is super excited about doing this in his words, and Buck is also super concerned about the people closest to him finding out that he’s doing this in his actions. But since we don’t see him expressing that worry, and we don’t see the team expressing any worry behind his back about it, the audience doesn’t know how they are supposed to be emotionally connecting to this story. I know you’ve got another ask planed on how we’re past the point of being able to satisfyingly wrap up this arc now that a baby has been made so I’ll save some rant for that, but just focused on what we have seen, the arc doesn’t make any sense on what Buck is truly feeling and therefore what the audience should be connecting to within the storyline. 

As for why they asked Buck, his buddy said it was because Buck was a good, kind, selfless person and you can’t tell that from a genetics facts sheet at the sperm bank. Which is....a) grossly manipulative, especially for someone like Buck which dude HAD to know, and b) isn’t even a tiny bit factually true! Yes kids have their own personalities and what they like and enjoy may not always line up with what their parents do, but your child being a good and kind person is sorta down to you teaching them to be good and kind. It isn’t going to just *happen* because of “genetics”. My guess is they approached him because he IS good and kind and they figured he would say yes, with the added bonus of him being a physically healthy person with on the surface level, probably “good” genetics.

Anyway, I tried to give this storyline a chance, just like I did with the impending BT breakup, but just like last season, it’s reached a point where pretty much whatever they do is going to result in Buck being the “victim” again and being the one to be “left behind” instead of being able to make the choice himself to leave a situation that isn’t good for him, meaning again, no real growth, and more of Buck being stuck having scenes and arcs entirely outside the firefam/his job. And as we saw with 4x14 and 99.9% of s5 and the BT relationship, KR doesn’t like anyone in the firefam being involved in Buck’s personal arcs. (Probably because if they WERE, he might actually learn something and be able to grow a little and we just can’t have that.)

[buddierecs]

post-lawsuit buddie fics

this list has different rated fics, so please look at the rating (none are explicit tho) make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

peace in austin by: angelwithwingsoffire "after the lawsuit, buck wanted to go back to work, back to his family, and put everything behind him. he knew things wouldn't be the same, but he did want them to be good. but they weren't. he wasn't welcome, he wasn't happy, and he didn't want to stay. so when an old friend gives him the chance at a new family, he takes it. will his old family realize they fucked up? word count: 124k rating: mature important tags: 911 lone star characters, angst, hurt/comfort, depression, ptsd, recovery, slow burn buck down under by: scarletmanuka "after being forced to use up his vacation days, buck feels more alone than ever. things are still strained between himself and his firefam so he reaches out to a friend he met online. shane invites him to come and stay with him and his wife, and while in aus, buck learns how to feed a joey, makes friends with chickens, and when a bushfire rages nearby, he steps up to the fight. the 118 have no idea, until they see Buck's face on international news coverage of the fire." word count: 75k rating: mature important tags: angst, fluff, australia, getting together, healing, slow burn, pining accidental by: rosefield "post lawsuit, buck accidentally cuts his arm. He decides that maybe not getting help is best for everyone." word count: 36k rating: teen and up important tags: TW: suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, hurt/comfort, depression, worrried!eddie diaz, angst with a happy ending five minutes by: onelonely_tortillachip "after the lawsuit, buck decides to take a small vacation to take a break from the stress of coming to work each day to a group of people who can't forgive him. he decides to fly back to wyoming to the ranch he worked on as a younger man. but the flight he is scheduled to take doesn't make it to its destination." word count: 71k rating: mature important tags: airplane crashes, grief, emotional hurt/comfort, depression, survivor guilt never say never by: buddiesmutslut "buck throws another clot, calls the 118 & maddie out on their shit, lets athena hold him as he cries, and then finally talks to eddie." word count: 11k rating: general audience important tags: protective!athena grant, not maddie buckley friendly, not 118 friendly, emotional hurt/comfort i would mind by: myartificalflowers "buck is depressed and when his life is threatened during a call, things sort of slip out in the aftermath" word count: 3.2k rating: teen and up important tags: TW: suicidal thoughts, depression, hostage situations, angst with happy ending that's the way it is with love by: lotte15 "buck is alone after the lawsuit. he finds a ranch while hiking and meets eddie diaz and his son there. eddie and buck fall in love. only after an accident does 118 realize how much buck has withdrawn and how little they know about him" word count: 17k rating: not rated important tags: different first meeting au, cowboy!eddie diaz, ptsd, injury recovery, angst, soft!eddie diaz, mild sexual content, whump

[dottiesficrecs]

Don't Take My Sunshine Away by SevenSoulmates

Rating: M

Ships: Buck & Christopher, Eddie & Christopher, Buck & Eddie, Buck/Eddie

Warnings (some spoilers): None Apply; emotional/psychological abuse from parents (Eddie's parents are very controlling and make Eddie and his siblings believe they are bad parents); false accusations of abuse (Eddie's parents accuse Eddie of being physically abusive to Christopher but it's not true); family court and custody battles; homophobia (Eddie's parents to Buck, Eddie, and Adrianna); coma / major injury / possibility Eddie won't wake up / grief and mourning; Christopher spends a lot of this fic in emotional distress because he's kept from Eddie as well as Buck; ableism from Eddie's parents; Bobby gets called out a bit BUT there is no Bobby bashing

Word Count: 114k

Summary: Eddie is in a coma, and Buck blames himself. He should've been there to protect Eddie. The least he can do now is to be there for Christopher, even if Buck doesn't know if he has it in him to be a parent without Eddie. Buck makes Eddie a deal: he'll fight for Christopher in the real world, while Eddie fights to wake up.

Eddie's come a long way since those bleak days in El Paso, listening to his parents comments about how he's not fit to be a father. How Christopher doesn't deserve to be dragged down by the likes of Eddie and Shannon. Eddie thought after moving to LA, he and Chris had escaped that. When he wakes up and finds Buck neck-deep in a legal battle with his parents for custody of Christopher, Eddie must face his own mistakes, and find the confidence to stand up for himself against his absolute worst nightmare.

Notes: This thing made me BAWL. I thought, "oh I love family drama and court fics and dad Buck, this fic will be great!" And it was!!! But I truly spent the vast majority of a 15 hour drive reading this and SOBBING in the backseat. This is top tier angst right here. The relationship between Eddie and Buck is really interesting -- it's mutual pining and fake dating -- the angst connected to loving someone you aren't sure will make it... ughh!! :chefskiss: Relatedly, Eddie's dreamscapes are so INTRIGUING. I was so desperate to jump into the fic to hug Christopher especially, but shit Buck and Eddie need them too. The way the rest of the 118 interacts is great, and Athena too. Eddie's parents are terrible. Carla is a saint and deserves better. Adriana is a really fun addition!! Of course, I love the whole fic, but the lighter moments really stand out to me. THERE IS A HAPPY ENDING. I would def recommend this fic, just... make sure you have some time and space to cry about it haha

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24784354/chapters/59932417

[weewoobrainrot]

i need carlos to go all badass cop on the abusive husband guy that punches owen in the 3x17 promo :)