#9:57am

[hyuuukais]

good morning but also not. i WILL be closing my eyes again soon

[dirtbagfag]

hi everyone 😈

[hedgehog-moss]

9am: Pirlouit & I are waiting for the farrier; it's Hoof Day! The farrier always tends to run late so I have a thermos of tea and a breakfast pastry to eat as we wait. Pirlouit has been offered some hay and has refused to eat it because he's sulking because it's hoof day.

Isn't it nice to get a pedicure, Pirou?

9:10am: The farrier is late and Pirlouit is worried, wondering what we're waiting for here on the road. Maybe he has been sold? to a sadistic new owner? who's going to shove him into a crate and send him to the salt mines like the donkeys in Pinocchio? Plus, he's more stressed than usual today because one of his hooves hurts (hence the farrier appointment), he's been limping for a few days and he doesn't know what the farrier will do to the hurt hoof. I told him there's only a 30% chance that he'll amputate it.

9:15am: Pirlouit's family is here to support him though! Or, in the case of Pampérigouste, here to puzzle out a vexing mystery.

9:17am: The llamas have grown bored of standing there in support and have started eating the brambles near the gate (supportively). Very good initiative, I approve. Also I thought Poldine was trying to eat the brambles outside the gate (greener on the other side and all that) but no, she was trying to fit her head through the bars for a little kiss </3

9:20am: Even Merricat is being supportive. (Well, she's waiting for me to go home so she can finally take her first morning nap in my lap.) Also Pirlouit has found some grass under the leaves and temporarily forgot all of his worries.

9:22am: Poldine is determined to kiss this cat.

9:24am: The farrier is here! As always he starts doing Pirlouit's hooves right there in the middle of the road, and if a car shows up well, "they can wait a few minutes... On n'est pas aux pièces" (this is a phrase for "there's no rush" that I've never heard anyone but my grandma use, it's nice to hear it again!) There aren't any cars anyway.

9:27am: Pirlouit's hurt hoof has been diagnosed: he has an abscess. Since this autumn has been relentlessly rainy I thought perhaps it was a fungal infection—but the farrier told me he's been treating a lot of abscesses lately, as the very wet weather softens hooves which allows bacteria to enter.

9:30am: The abscess was successfully drained and Pirlouit is now wearing a fashionable hoof bandage. He was very calm and brave throughout <3

9:35am: The farrier left his car by the side of the road, and after releasing Pirlouit we crossed the pasture to go home have a cup of coffee.

9:45am: The farrier is gone; end of the post :)

10am: Pampe is gone, too.

Well, she probably left around 10am but I didn't immediately find out as I had more pressing problems. After the farrier left I went to get a small apple to reward Pirlouit, and when I returned to the pasture and he came over for his treat, I realised he was limping. But on the other side. We've just treated his right front hoof, and he is now holding up the left front hoof...

9:57am: After giving Pirlouit his apple I go home in a hurry to call the farrier and ask him to come back. But there's almost no mobile service around here and I can't reach him. This is so frustrating, he can't be very far... On a hunch I call a horse farm not far from here, maybe it's hoof day for their horses as well?

10am: It's not, they have no farrier appointment today, but when I explain my predicament the woman on the phone goes "if it's just to drain an abscess I can send you a guy who'll do it, no worries!" Every time I've had someone from this farm on the phone to ask something or other, they've offered to Send Me A Guy. It's never the same guy too, they have an endless supply of guys.

10:05am: Having accepted gratefully, I return to the pasture to catch poor Pirlouit again, who thought I was done bothering him for today. As I wait for The Guy, I find a spot with some unexpected mobile service and start googling hoof hardeners, because maybe if Pirou's prone to abscesses it's worth having something in prevention for wet months?

10:15am: I receive a text from the guy.

"Is it normal that your llama is on the road with a dog? They are going to [village]."

10:16am: I reply to the guy.

"It's neither normal nor abnormal."

10:17am: I tie Pirlouit to a tree and run back to the barn to get some muesli. Then start running on the road, trying to figure out how Pampe escaped, and the answer seems obvious: after his coffee the farrier crossed the pasture again to get back to his car, and he knew about the Special Anti-Pampe Safety Knot 3000 but either forgot and closed the gate like a normal person, or didn't do it correctly. Pampe in her little llama brain knows very well that most visitors don't know about the Anti-Pampe Knot so she hurries to check the gate after a stranger leaves her pasture. Meanwhile I was busy noticing Pirou's limp and trying to call the farrier back and I didn't check the gate as I usually do.

10:20am: The guy has found me trotting on the road with my muesli and picked me up in his car. We go back to where he last saw Pampe. I apologise for wasting his time and he tells me "I've heard of your llama" in a tone half-sympathetic half-fatalistic.

10:24am: Pampe & Pandolf have been located; are having the time of their lives. Pandolf is a bit sheepish when I call him, though. He loves going on adventures with his best friend so much but he knows it's a bad dog thing to do for some reason :(

10:34am: The Guy is trying to push Pampe forward with his car while I try to attract her towards me with my muesli in a carrot-and-stick routine; Pampe occasionally veers off-road to eat some leaves, inspect the mud in the ditch, pretend to admire a cloud while secretly brainstorming strategies.

Guy's commentary: "This is worse than dealing with an escaped horse. I feel ignored. I feel powerless."

10:39am: Pampe is home! She didn't actually go very far. But since she hadn't locked the gate behind her, when we arrived we found Pampelune on the road as well, just sort of waiting for us like a sentinel. Pirlouit was still tied to his tree staring at his inexplicably orange foot, and Poldine was panicking because her mother had abandoned her for the millionth time and her grandma had left the pasture too and she couldn't figure out how :((( All she had to do was fiddle with the gate with her nose really, but it never occurred to her to do so, she's too innocent. She only inspects gates in order to figure out how to kiss someone through them. So she was alone in the pasture trotting in circles, making undignified sad goat noises when Pampe & I returned.

10:53am: Pirlouit's other hoof has been treated, hopefully he'll feel better and stop limping soon... I'll have to remove the bandages with scissors, clean both hooves and re-do the bandages in a couple of days which is probably going to be a whole Thing, considering he's suspicious of buckets of water and scissors and objects in general. But as for now everyone is in the pasture having some celebratory hay and Pampoldine is deeply relieved to find that she hasn't been abandoned by everyone forever (as she assumes every single time.)

Also I realised I only paid the farrier half of what I owed him... I had prepared the exact sum but I had half in one pocket and half in another which was a risky idea. And neither of us checked what I was handing him, or noticed. He called me back when he arrived in a place with mobile reception and I told him about the whole affair and he said it's a good thing I accidentally paid him half because he didn't see the other abscess and failed to make the Anti-Pampe Knot 3000 so "it's a fair discount." So I got a half-price farrier visit thanks to Pampe (partly)... I won't tell her because she already thinks she's doing the world a favour by escaping (free fence integrity checks, free cardio training for me by forcing me to do interval running, free entertainment for everyone, plus her modest contribution to cosmic chaos.)

11am: I meant to take an "all's well that ends well" photo of the whole family but I realised Pampe is making her angry hammerhead shark face because her adventure was very short-lived and I didn't even take a picture of her escape, as I'd left my phone in my coat pocket under Pirlouit's tree (& supervision) when I went after her. (I figured I was about to run for 15min and would not need my heavy coat)

She thinks I did it on purpose to demoralise her by refusing to document her victories. But she's not giving up.

[pedge-page]

Joel Miller x F!Reader - Piss Kink #4

if you're feeling bold, can be read with more Piss kink #1, #2, #3, or alone.

Summary: Joel entices you home with a uniquely fun hommade toy that he's been edging himself with.

Warnings: pisskink! , pill-filled condom, sending nudes ish, nipple play, sub!Joel returns!, male masturbation, mirror masturbation, assisted masturbation, overstimulation, degrading lanauge towards Joel, this one is all about Joel

18+ ONLY

- - - -

Work fucking sucks when you’re horny as shit.

While you rot away at a desk 5 days a week, from 9-5 with limited days off, you get a bit envious of Joel’s flexible schedule where he can pick his own contracts, his own projects, and work his own hours at his own fee.

Must be nice to be a solid brick wall of meat.

And he doesn’t make it any better. Having your phone buzz off at your desk literally every 5 seconds with pictures of his scruffy head waking up at 9:57am, his homemade sausage links and pancakes, his feet propped up on the coffee table while sipping away your coffee in your mug that you forgot because you were running late!

You: Fuck off, lazy ass

Joel: come home and I’ll fuck your ass all day :P

You: do you have any real plans today other than being a little shit?

There’s 15 minutes of silence from his end. Enough that you’re pretty far into a project you couldn’t get off the ground, until there’s a new chime vibrating from your phone. 

Joel: video attachment

You bite your lips, hovering over the file icon. This could be just another “Joel enjoying his day off” …

or a “Joel enjoying his day off.”

Not risking it, you run to the bathroom and lock yourself in the stall.

The video plays, and you can make out Joel’s big fat blurry fingers blocking half the camera as he angles the phone on the sink vanity, facing himself in the mirror focus sense. He backs away, and unzips his jeans. His cock is only half hard, but that doesn’t deter him from pumping it lazily in his hand, digging in the drawer off camera looking for something.

It’s not until he’s ripping off a condom with his teeth that you’re very intrigued. 

“Got a present for ya when you come home,” he smirks into the camera.

He rolls the plastic over his much harder cock now, pulling it tight all the way to the base, stretching it over his thick length.

Joel’s not one to use condoms, so this is—new.

He’s breathing hard, chest rising and falling as he pumps his dick with short jerks. His thumb teases over the clear covered tip. there’s some sweet little noises you know you’re missing because the mic doesn’t pick it up, but by the way his brows furrow, his lips part with eyes closed, you know he’s feeling dirty and good.

He lets out a strong groan, and the condom starts inflating quickly as he relives his urine. “FUck—fuck , shit, it’s filling up fast.”

You hold in a gasp because fuck yeah he’s right. The condom expands rapidly as yellow liquid quickly pools in the empty nub at the top before over coming the underside.

“Mmm—ah—ah-ahh-yeahfuck baby—its’ warm. Warm like you,” he grunts, smiling. He tilts his head back and moans, thrusting his hips a bit more like he wants to fuck it. 

He breathes shallowly when it’s over. The condom now tightly packed with warm golden piss around his aching length like a thick balloon, not much larger than a short zucchini but still impressively bulging.

He jerks over himself a little bit, watching the liquid bounce with such inertia it takes a moment to even out. It should be disgusting, really, watching him play with himself with his own piss like a pocket pussy, were it not for the tight clench of your thighs and throb between your legs.

“Reminds me of ya tummy when I filled ya full of it the other day.”

He starts to pull his jeans back up, careful to tuck the full package into his crock area before zipping it up cautiously. Two little hops and everything falls into place. He groans as he manages the button over his waist.

He pats his new bulge before winking into the camera and the video ends.

You don’t even realize you were biting your finger nails while sitting on the toilet seat in the stall. Your skirt bunches up over your legs as you spread them. Fuck, you can’t touch yourself at work!

Just as you’re about to write an extremely lengthly curse off to Joel, another image attachment comes in:

Joel lying on the couch with the camera facing down towards his feet, the evident bulge still packed tight in his head with his girth hand gripping at it through his jeans.

Joel: Warm n tight, just like your sweet little cunt :) 

Another video comes in, and there’s barely any intuition in you left to ignore it as you’re hitting play so quickly.

He’s positioned the phone in front of him again at the couch, folding laundry causally with his legs spread wide. The bulge in his pants, however, is much bigger. Each uncomfortable  shift only elicits a whimper from him, grinding into his palm to adjust the position but only turning him on more. He leans back and unbuttons the pants. The zipper practically falls away on its own to give room to the massive piss filled condom, shaped like a droopy sack, it’s been desperately trying to hold together.

He sighs in relief, jiggling the balloon. It’s now the length of a fat cucumber, sagging to the cushion from the weight. 

“Shit. This is a fuckin’ strong ass condom, baby. Feels like I’m bout to burst everywhere.”

He continues to smack it, jerk it, play with it like a silicon boob and not like it’s his own urine filling a condom and drawing his poor dick, still hard as a rock and an angry shade of red infused with the yellow tint of the sloshing liquid. His leg bounces, both of you hypnotized at the way the latex ripple with each wave.

“Can’t wait for you to come home and see how big it’s gonna get in your hand.” He cups his balls underneath while fisting his warm and wet pocket pussy. It jiggles obscenely in his hand, his hips thrusting into it until his tummy tense and he stills. You can just barely see the little air bubble at the top get smaller as he relieves himself more. His eyes roll back, feeling the warmth surround his meat like living inside your cunt. 

The video ends, and a second image is waiting for you:

Joel standing with his top belt button undone but the zipper struggling to stay up, holding his fat bulge that now has taken over to drooping down his thighs.

Joel: Fucking Christ baby, you see how fucking tight this is? 

You don’t open the last video attachment, as you’re already packing your computer away and telling your manager you’re not feeling well, zipping to your car and speeding home.

-

Joel’s cock is in a constant state of pain and pleasure all day. For one, his piss is keeping everything so fucking warm, unlike anything he’s felt regularly wrapped around his cock, stuffed in his pants. But on the other hand, his dick has been trapped inside a warm wet fluid substance for over two hours non stop hard, and he’s ready to cum geysers.

He considers whether waiting all day for you to come home for his “present” is going to be worth it when he hears keys being entered into the front entrance.

He’s standing right there the moment you open the door. He can tell you rushed with the state of your wrinkled shirt half untucked, messy hair and even more evident—the ferocious look in your eyes. 

You wrap your arms around him and hug him close. He lets out a tiny sigh, feeling your middle press against his crotch tightly. To your delight, it’s still there, all packed tight and warm, crammed so stiffly it could burst with any more pressure. Your hand roughly grabs at the squishy bulge in his jeans and Joel stutters a gasp, then a little moan with his eyes closed in bliss. You can just barely hear the quiet rush of liquid filling into the condom even more.

“Did you just piss some more?” You ask, your hand rubbings soothing circles over the bulge.

He nods, lips parted sinfully with dazed eyes now that you’re here and in charge.

“You’re a naughty boy, sending that shit at work. Making me come home early to take care of this,” you whisper sensually in your honey silk voice that has his veins shivering from excitement and trouble. 

“Nnmgg—mmmm, I wanted you here. And you want its too,” he snickers.

You tug the collar of his shirt and pull him in for a harsh kiss. He groans into your month, pulling you closer and grinding himself into your secure body like a horny teen. His body melts in to your touch, more needy to have you here than you were to have him.

Your tongue holds his hostage while you busy your fingers and unbutton his jeans. The piss filled condom spills out of there like it was desperate to breathe. 

Joel lets out a pathetic sigh of relief. You continue to palm him while he pants into your mouth, all the pent of pressure finally having room to escape, but still trapping his thick cock. It’s fucking heavy, the weight of his hot urine filling the bag over and over again, latex stretched so tight. “It’s.. s-so heavy—bout to burst,” he rasps, eyes shut into your shoulder as you hold it for him. 

You smirk against his lips, continuing your torture in your hand while he shivers.

You reach below the moist cucumber sack and roll his balls in your hand, tugging gently to get him to follow you.

He obeys beautifully. Leaping after you as you massage him, trailing so close that he’s wafting your hair product, twitching in your palm.

“Sit,” you command, pointing to the floor in the bedroom, directly in front of your floor length mirror.

He sinks to the group, staring at his reflection. So pretty and small beneath you. You slide right behind him, hands slowly tracing along his inner thighs, making him involuntarily man spread. 

You grasp the urine condom and start tugging, jerking it in your hand as you pinch his nipples under his shirt with your free hand. 

“You look like a fucking pervert and a whore.”

He whimpers and melts into your touch. Tense in his cock and chest but relaxed everywhere else. Despite the mass of the man in front of you, practically blocking your view of his beautiful twitching body, you perch over his arm to watch. 

His eyes keep drifting back, pleasure consuming him after edging all day. But he keeps snapping forward to look at how you’re tearing him apart.

“Only fucking disgusting boys do this type of shit, Joel. Is that what you are?”

He nods vigorously, hips cantering forward.

The sloshing of liquid grows louder as you pump over the slimy sack faster. His shirt rides up, his soft belly flexing with each painful breath he forces going in and out. 

“Can you fill this up some more? While I’l jerking you off? Don’t cum yet. Want more of your foul liquid to fill this thing. It’s so fucking big, Joel. see how much we can pack into here before it explodes!” You laugh.

He grits his teeth, and you still your movement. With a few assisted tugs wrapped around your own hand, he’s moaning out pornographically, and you can see through the latex the extra stream of gold forced out of the tip of his dick and expanding the hot condom. It’s big enough now that you need Joel to help wrap his other hand around it. The two of you jacking him off together.

“Such a fucking good boy, Miller. My piss hungry boy.”

If you weren’t so fucking turned on by your whimpering mess of a boyfriend you’d be cringing so hard. But Joel just somehow always manages to bring that side out of you.

“Arrgghhhhh--aahhh—oh—ohh—ohf—oh fuck! Fuck it baby, yeah—YEAH—unfff I’m—I’m gonna—“ he’s blabbering incoherently, nodding and shaking his head, overstimulated and yet so close to getting what his whole body is begging for. The condom bounces along as the two of you fall out of rhythm, smashing against his pelvis and balls, his tip stretching across the clear seal before being drowned in a vacuum of piss. 

You accidentally pinch the condom as you pull it close to him again. Coupled with being filled to its limit, the entire thing snaps in a giant explosion of the piss damn breaking, ursting all over Joel’s torso and thighs and the floor.

The impact of it all has his hips thrusting forward, his jaw dropping open in a surprised gasp when he cums into the free air—ropes of it shooting so far onto the mirror. You don’t stop, despite the wet mess all over him and tattered condom shred still clinging between your digits, jerking his wet cock to completion and tilting his hips up so that his creamy spend shoots on his pouty lower lip.

He licks away the salty tang of his orgasm,  breathing down from his high. You  both observe him in the mirror: clothes drenched from chest to knee, splatters of of his spend adorning him and the mirror like overly-excited icing on a tres-leches soaked cake. 

He’s shaking from the aftershock. So overly whipped and leaning further back against you for support. You hold his cock, now finally able to breathe, as you kiss along his jaw and neck. “You’re so gross, I fucking love it,” you tease, nipping at his ear.

He smiles with you, sighing up to the ceiling with blissful sedation. 

He stays pliant in your arms, head resting against your breasts. It’s quiet, minus the love sucks you’re dressing all over his face with your lipstick.

He opens his eyes. “How about a hug after such a loooooong day at work, baby?”

You stop kissing him and lean away, shaking your head. 

“No? Are you sure? I think you need it,” he hums, a devious look in his eyes as he starts to turn on you. 

“Don’t you fucking dare!” You warn. You immediately scramble to your feet and try to run out the door, but Joel’s caught up in no time, bear hugging you from behind.

“Awwwww, isn’t this soooo nice, baby?”

“Gross, gross, gross!” You laugh, wiggling unsuccessfully as you feel his urine seeping from his clothes to your beautiful white blouse and ironed skirt. You shiver at the warm, disgusting feeling of it all.

“Fucking nasty perverted piss boy.”

He giggles into your hair as you admin defeat, swaying with him in a tight embrace.

“With my fucking nasty perverted piss girl.”

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[stormz369]

☕💖 Can I Get Your Number? ☕💖 Ch 18

Jason Todd x (f)Chubby!Reader

written with a female reader in mind, first person pov, no use of Y/N, will probably get NSFW later, let me know if there's anything else I should tag this with!

warnings/labels: use of mommy/mama as a pet name (non-sexual), vague talk about troubled childhoods, sort of a found-family thing?, brief encounter with a grocery store Karen wc: 2.7k Disclaimer: I am very white, everything I write about Damian's cultural background is coming from 1) internet research on Damian 1.5) pestering my comic reader friend about Damian/Talia/Ra's al Ghoul (but so far he's basically said that DC really does stand for Disregard Canon, so I can reasonably do whatever works for my narrative and it'll be canon friendly somewhere) and 2) internet research on Arabic cultural practices/foods/etc.

I always endeavor to write about others' cultures with respect or not at all, and to put in an appropriate amount of research to get details as right as possible. That being said, I am human, and don't always know what to look for to get the information I need. If you know that something I've included is culturally incorrect please do feel free to tell me (if you have the emotional bandwidth)! I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to me that I write about Damian's Arabic heritage correctly and with respect, and any rewriting/research guidance offered will always be greatly appreciated and credit given where due! If you wish to provide feedback anonymously, feel free to send them as asks, but please do include an emoji or something I can use to credit you for your emotional labor in the applicable chapters! And thank you in advance! This is where I got the info about ma'amoul cookies, if anyone is interested!

Chapter Selection

I woke sandwiched between the boys; Jason's arms were wrapped around my waist, and Damian's back was pressed into my chest. I smiled softly, gently stroking his hair. He groaned softly and flipped around, cuddling into me.

Jason shifted, stroking my side. “Mh … morning~”

“Morning~” I whispered, smiling softly.

He sat up, stretching a bit. “... He looks downright peaceful with you…”

“Like he feels safe?”

“… Yeah. … I'm glad you can give him that. … He's been through alot.”

I nodded, stroking his hair more. “I can tell. … I like letting him be a kid.”

Jason nodded, leaning over to kiss my temple. “I think he likes it too. … I'll make breakfast~”

I nodded, holding Damian close. He sighed softly, snuggling in more. Eventually, the smells of breakfast cooking wafted into the room, and Damian's eyes slowly fluttered open. The instant he realized how close we were he darted back, almost falling off the edge of the bed. After a moment he looked away awkwardly, clearing his throat.

“... Um … th- thank you, for … everything.”

 I nodded, sitting up. “Of course. Anything you want to do today?”

He frowned a bit. “... Is Todd working tonight?”

“I think so. You wanna do something fun when he goes?”

“... If you don't mind?”

“I don't mind.” I smiled softly. He flushed a bit, smiling into his chest.

“Ok … Thanks.”

I nodded, stretching. “Jay's making breakfast.”

He nodded, getting up and grabbing his clothes. I checked my phone, frowning a bit when I saw that Bruce had texted.

Bruce: Is Damian alright? 9:05am Me: Yes, he's ok 10:45am Bruce: Jason said one of his teachers said something about him? He said you were very upset about it. 10:48am Me: Yes, the math teacher. It was inexcusable, and I made sure she knew it. Jason got him switched into a new math class, so it shouldn't be a problem anymore 10:49am Bruce: Very good. … Jason also mentioned that Damian seemed to think he had to let them talk about him like that? 10:53am Me: He thought calling them out qualified as misbehaving 10:55am Bruce: … I'll speak to him when he gets home. Obviously I don't want him to put up with that. 10:57am Me: … Maybe not so obviously. I think he was worried about disappointing you. He seemed more concerned with how dealing with it would affect you publicly than with how it was affecting him to hear it 11:00am Bruce: … I'll fix this. 11:02am

I sighed softly. Somehow I doubted Bruce could fix it just like that. I changed into some casual clothes and joined the boys in the kitchen. Jason slid a few pancakes onto a plate for me and kissed my cheek.

“Thanks, pumpkin~”

Damian snorted softly, smirking at Jason. “... ‘Pumpkin’?”

I smirked back, leaning forward; “careful, kiddo. I can think of plenty of fun nicknames for you too, my little jellybean~”

He grimaced. “Ugh..”

“No? You don't like that? How about cutie patootie? Angel pie? Honey-bunch?”

Damian groaned, shaking his head. “Nooo! Gross!”

Jason chuckled, rolling his eyes. “Ok, mama, he's had enough.”

Damian froze, frowning. His walls shot right back up, and his voice was sharp; “... She is not my mother.”

“And thank God for that.” Jason rolled his eyes. “Your mother's a real piece of work. Trade up while the trading's good.”

Damian frowned more, staring into his plate. “... Mother is a … complicated woman. But she's my mother.”

My heart ached at how carefully he said it. Complicated was the nicest thing he could think to say about her? “... I'm sure she loves you, kiddo.”

Damian's jaw clenched as he nodded. “Yes, she does.”

Jason frowned a bit. “... In her way.”

We spent the weekend in a domestic bubble; we cooked together, watched movies, played games, and after Jason went to work Damian and I played with his craft kits. Watching him relax into the little family unit we established for ourselves almost made me wonder if he really was starting to view me as a maternal figure. I didn't mind if he was, but I wasn't sure how much I should lean into it. As with most things with Damian, I decided it was best to let him set the pace.

The next Friday night, Damian came over again. Jason sighed, rolling his eyes affectionately when he saw Damian at the kitchen table. “Do you have my girl playing mommy again?”

Damian blushed bright red, glaring at him. I raised an eyebrow, staring at Jason. “I told him he could come over, Jason.”

I set a plate of cookies on the table and a glass of milk. “You just finish your homework, kiddo. And don't burn yourself on the cookies, they're still hot.”

Damian nodded, taking one. Jason leaned over to grab one as well, but before he could I gently smacked his hand and grabbed his shirt, leading him into my room. “Not yet.”

He frowned, following along. “What? What'd I do?”

I shut the door, turning to face him. “Jay, my love, when you say things like that you make it harder for him to relax. You said yourself, he's been through alot; if he wants a taste of the nuclear family life, I'm happy to baby him all he wants. If he wants to come over every weekend I'll make cookies and ‘play mommy’, as you put it. And I don't want you making him feel weird about it. Ok?”

He shifted a bit, looking down at his feet. “Right, … sorry baby. It was just a joke…”

“I know, but he's still getting used to the idea that this is ok. Sometimes I think he expects to be punished for asking for things. I had to convince him to tell me what kinds of cookies he likes best. And he looked so surprised when I said we'd go to the store tomorrow for the ingredients I don't have. Like he thought it was a hypothetical question.”

Jason sighed, nodding. “He probably did…”

I nodded, gently cupping his cheek. “Just be gentle with him, ok? … Remember, if I'm playing mommy for him, I'm also playing house-wife for you~”

He blushed a bit and chuckled, wrapping his arms around my waist. “That sounds nice~ … you gonna wear a cute little apron and serve breakfast in bed?”

“Only if I manage to get up before you. Sometimes I think you don't sleep at all.” I chuckled, kissing him softly. He kissed back gently and smiled softly, nodding. 

“Mh~ ok, mama, I'll play nice~”

I chuckled softly, kissing him again. “Good boy~”

The flash of red across his face made me giggle, and I led him back out of the bedroom. “Now you may have a cookie. And I'm making stir-fry for dinner.”

Damian looked up at me as I passed; “is it…”

I nodded; “vegetarian. And I think I finally figured out how to get that nice crispy layer on the tofu too!”

His lips curled up ever so slightly, he nodded once, and returned to his homework. Jason sat next to him, taking a cookie, and looked over his shoulder at his homework. “... New math teacher treating you ok?”

“It’s only been a week, but … Yeah, he seems like a nice guy so far. And word of the ‘crazy art show lady' has spread throughout the faculty.” I smirked a bit at that. I could be ‘crazy art show lady' if it made them think twice about disrespecting him.

Jason nodded. “Good.”

When I brought out dinner, Damian practically inhaled his first few bites. I blinked a bit, chuckling softly. “Don't choke, kiddo.”

He nodded, slowing down a bit. Periodically, I'd catch him staring at his backpack. “... You need something outta there?”

He flushed, shaking his head. “No, just … Jon is waiting for me to finish dinner.”

��Oh, I don't have a ‘no phones at the table' rule, kiddo. You can text your friend.”

He blinked repeatedly. “... I can?”

“Yeah, I don't mind. It would be pretty hypocritical if I did; I never go anywhere without my phone.”

Damian smiled a little and got his phone, texting Jon quickly. His guarded expression slowly melted away, and I had to remind myself not to stare before he caught me.

“... Do you want to invite him over some time?”

Damian looked up, frowning a bit. “Invite Jon over … here?”

“Yeah, you two could have a sleepover in the living room.”

“... Could we go to the arcade at the mall?”

“Sure! As long as his parents are ok with it. And give them my phone number in case they want to talk to me first, or need to check in.”

Damian grinned, nodding, and texted Jon quickly. “... Next weekend?”

“Sounds like a plan!”

Damian stared disdainfully at the wall of flour, scouring it for the kind needed for his cookies. Eventually, he grabbed a small bag, bringing it back to me.

“That's the one?”

He nodded slowly, frowning. “... I'm not used to looking for it in English, but this should be right.”

I nodded, gesturing for him to put it in the cart. “Ok, is that gonna be enough?” He nodded, releasing it. “What’s next?”

“Ghee.” He grabbed the corner of the cart and led me down the aisle, finding what he needed. He tsked softly at the container, but tossed it into the cart as well before leading the way to the spices. He selected several extracts, rose water, and a few spices I was low on.

“Alright, what else?”

“Dates, figs, pistachios, and walnuts.”

We scanned the aisles, eventually finding what we needed, and headed for the check-out counter. The way Damian watched the cashier and me had me wondering if he had ever been to an American grocery store before. I bagged the groceries, chatting with the cashier a bit.

The lady behind us in line glowered at Damian. He frowned, eyeing her for a moment, before continuing to watch the check out process. She huffed, rolling her eyes; “aren't you going to help, young man?”

I frowned, turning toward her. “Hey, leave him alone.”

I held a hand out for him, gesturing for him to come close. He frowned, taking a couple steps toward me.

She frowned more, looking more and more like she bit into a lemon. “I'm just saying, good boys don't just stare while others do the work.”

“No one asked you, lady. Back off.” I let my hand hover over his shoulder for a moment, not touching him but clearly indicating that he was under my protection. He glanced at my hand before looking up at me. “Should I do something?”

“No, kiddo, you're fine. We're just about done, and I would ask if I wanted help.”

He smirked slightly, watching me put my wallet away and grab the bags. He pulled the cart to the cart return and we headed out, strolling back to our bus stop. After a moment, he reached over and took the bag from one of my hands.

I smiled softly, letting him have it. “Don't let people like her bother you, ok? They're just grumpy that my generation doesn't expect kids to read our minds.”

He frowned a bit, staring at the sidewalk in front of him. “... That was common, in older generations?”

“Mh, yeah, I think so. My grandparents always had something to say about how my parents ‘coddled’ us. And my parents sure have a lot to say about how new parents are ‘babying’ their kids with the newest theories and parenting practices.” I chuckled; “as if there's something wrong with babying a literal baby?”

“... Back home, I was expected to behave just like the rest of the household. No matter my age.”

I nodded slowly. “Different cultures approach parenting differently, I suppose.”

“... I think in my case it's more of … my mother's approach to parenting.”

“Ah…”

He stared at a spot in front of him, frowning deeply; “... She loves me, she just … she had a … complicated life. … She did the best she could for me.”

I nodded. “... Parents are people. And people are flawed. Loving them doesn't mean we have to pretend they haven't hurt us, or that we have to forgive them for the bad parts of our childhood. … It's very mature of you to keep her experiences in mind like that. But you're also allowed to be upset.”

“... Upset?”

“It sounds like a classic example of ‘I had it bad, but my parents had it worse'. But you're still entitled to your feelings about your childhood. The good and the bad. … Children are supposed to be protected and cared for, but some kids … just don't get to have that. You're allowed to mourn the childhood you should have had. And you're allowed to seek out those experiences now.”

“... Like the craft kits?”

“Exactly. I bet it’s freeing, being able to just play, right?”

He nodded slowly. “... It is. … It's nice, not worrying about what people will think, or do. … You … you don't make a big thing about it.”

“Because it doesn't have to be a big thing if you don't want it to be. You get to decide what matters in this, and who's involved.”

He nodded slowly. “... Mother would be furious, if she knew Todd has been joking the way he has.”

“Joking?”

“... About you playing mommy.”

“Ah. I can make him stop if it makes you uncomfortable… But I also don't mind it if you don't.”

“... I will think on it.” 

When the bus arrived we hopped on, finding a seat. Damian stared out the window, clutching his bag. At our stop I had to gently tug on the bag handles to pull him out of his thoughts, and we headed up to my apartment.

“Ok, remind me what the cookies we're making are called?”

“Ma’amoul. Mother made them for holidays…”

I smiled softly and nodded. “Well, I hope they'll live up to your memories then.”

We worked together to make the cookies, Damian staying practically underfoot to make sure they came out just right. The molding and filling process took quite a while, but we plowed through, slowly working out a rhythm. He hovered, watching them in the oven, until they were finally ready.

I carefully transferred them to a cooling rack and he immediately took one, breaking it in half. He looked it over, sniffing it a bit, and finally took a bite, chewing slowly. I watched, biting the inside of my lower lip a bit. “... What do you think, kiddo?”

He stared at the half of a cookie in his hand, his expression unreadable. Finally, he mumbled; “... Well, they're very ugly. … But they taste like home.”

I smiled softly, holding my arms behind my back to stop myself from pulling him into a hug. “I'm glad. And I'm sure the next batch will be prettier. Practice makes perfect, right?”

“The next batch?” He looked up at me curiously.

“Of course. You said they're your favorites.”

He flushed a bit and stared at the cookie in his hands again, nodding. “Yes, they are.”

“Then I'm gonna get good at this so you can have them more often.”

After a moment, he reached over to grip my elbow, gently squeezing before dropping his hand again. It was over as quick as it began, but I felt his warmth linger on my arm. I smiled softly, holding an arm out for him. He considered for a second before leaning in, letting me give him a quick shoulder squeeze.

“I'm glad you're happy with them, sweetheart. Why don't you go sit, and I'll bring you a plate and a glass of milk? And when the rest are cool we'll put them in a tupperware for you to take home.”

He nodded, nibbling on the rest of his cookie while I made up a plate for him. We sat on the couch, letting some dumb action movie fill the silence while we enjoyed the fruits of our labor.

Next ->

Divider by: @saradika-graphics

Taglist (open): @jawdropforkpop @krys0210 @snowy-violet @superthoughts @wordsfromshona @mystic60 @iwannabealocalcryptid @morstuavitamea-a @frosty--giants @arisa191 @prized-jules @phoenix666stuff @dinonuggysandhuggus @anuttellaa @whore-of-many-hot-men

[snoopyana]

thot shit.

“ninety-nine percent tint in a blacked-out wraith.”

working at a bar wasn’t your first choice, but it definitely was your best when jung sungchan swings by for a visit. following him to his car for a little late night fun.

jung sungchan. smut.

face smushed into his backseat, the car windows fogged over. the gentle shake of the vehicle didn’t match what went down inside. if you could think straight, you’d be thankful for sungchans’ 5% window tint.

the workday started like any other, eating your dinner before heading off to work. leaning forward on your kitchen island, your eyes watched as your coworkers decided who was doing what that night. not bothering to take part in the conversation — as you were always going table to table taking food orders. being a waitress who occasionally made a drink or two.

sliding the dirty dishes into the sink, you treaded to your room. looking at the outfit you had laid out hours prior. a rather comfy set, skin-colored fleece lined leggings, a black skirt and a blue sweater — paired with your black ugg’s and silver jewelry. it definitely wasn’t an outfit that you’d usually wear to work, but the recent chills outside gave you a change of heart. looking at your phone for the time. ‘9:30PM’ stared back at you, deciding it was about time to leave, you rushed to your entry way, slipping on the coat that hung near the door — wanting to beat the snow before it got too heavy. tugging at the fleece tights that clung onto your legs, you were out the apartment door. quickly getting to your car and off to the bar.

arriving 10 minutes before opening, you had to slip through the crowd that waited for the doors to open. rolling your eyes as some of the drunks called for your attention. stepping into the side door, you threw your coat onto one of the couches in the employee’s lounge. “hey yn! i didn’t know if you were gonna show up or not. you never answer the group chat!” your eyes darted to the man that greeted you. being pulled into a hug. “hii taro. i honestly couldn’t be bothered to answer that group chat anymore.” a sarcastic pout formed on his lips as he pulled away. “understandable i GUESS!” walking around to the front of the bar with you following suit.

before you knew it, herds of drunk individuals came flooding through the doors. you were being called to a different table every second — serving people their drinks left and right. right when you thought you had a moment of free time, there was a tap on your shoulder. whipping around, you were met by a mans chest. “sorry to bother you, but can you point me to the bathroom?”

tilting your head to meet his gaze, you were taken aback by how stunning he was. seeing your fair share of good looking faces, he was one of the few that genuinely took your breath away. the man tilted his head, wondering if you were still listening. “hello?” his voice snapping you back to reality. “oh yeah,” you spoke, “follow me this way.” leading the male to the back, you could feel his eyes watching the way you swayed. your chest tightened at the thought.

“right down there.” you pointed down a hall, watching as he made way to the room. taking a deep breath, you failed to realize that you had been holding it the whole time. brushing the encounter to the side, you made your way back to the main area — being bombarded with more questions and requests.

finally being able to catch your breath, your hands searched your server apron for the device. ‘2:57AM’ blared on the screen. the bar had partially emptied out, half the tables still being occupied. your other colleagues had come in a few hours earlier, helping with the crowd. as your fingers tapped the glass screen, you could feel someone watching you. your eyes scanning the area locking with him. using his fingers, he beckoned you to his table.

stumbling over your feet, your body made way to where sungchan was seated. “sorry to bother you for the second time tonight,“ he paused — eyeing your outfit, “but i was wondering if you could bring me another peach soju.” nodding, you quickly made way to the bar. leaning over to get your coworkers attention.

“seokie! i need another bottle of peach soju please.” you spoke while looking back at sungchans’ table. looking past you, eunseok snuck a look at the table too. “he hasn’t has a single drink since he got here,” he mumbled under his breath “but now he wants one..” — cocking an eyebrow, eunseok was turning on his heels to fetch the drink. handing you a fresh bottle and sending you off.

popping the bottle open, his intense gaze made your hands tremble more than usual — but maybe you were tired. pouring the liquid into the shot glass, you slid it his way. “thanks sweets.” he spoke with the cup now on his bottom lip. giving him a quick head bow, you promptly walked to assist another table. in which they noticed your grip on the alcohol bottle, knuckles turning white as the pads of your fingers clung to the glass — as if you were trying to break it.

the place was now close to vacant, finally giving you a moment to breathe properly. just as you thought your night would come to a close, your eyes landed on sungchan who was standing idly outside, in-front of the conveniently propped open doors. everything seemed a little too planned out — but who were you to care. something inside of you told you to walk up to him. rushing to the back, your apron was replaced with your jacket. darting back to the front door. sungchan was walking around the corner — to the parking garage right next to the establishment.

lucky for you, that was where you parked as well. rushing to catch up, you were caught off guard, bumping into the man as you rounded the corner. “where are you off to?” he questioned, hands stuffed in his coat pockets. the wind was already knocked out of you, so his question didn’t necessarily register in your mind — all you could do was stand there wide eyed. “i don’t wanna come off as harsh love, but you seem a little ditzy.” those words finally pushed you back into reality, you were now wide-eyed for a completely different reason. “no i’m.. i’m just a little..” your sentence was cut short, watching as sungchan walked away from you.

“hey! that was kinda rude. walking away while i was speaking!” chasing after the guy, you nearly stumbled over your boots and the snow. “you were taking too long princess.” he continued to trudge up the stairs, stopping infront of his black wraith, with the windows damn near impossible to see through. “i was just a little out of it.” huffing, regret started to fill your mind. maybe you shouldn’t have followed him out. “so like i said earlier, ditzy.”

he leaned on the backseat door, arms hooked around his chest. watching you search for your words. why was it so difficult to talk to him? “no i’m not ditzy.” finally finding your voice, his gaze swallowing you whole. “i can make you ditzy.” the words fell out of his mouth like it was nothing, his eyes never once wavering. while you felt weak in the knees.

your attention falling onto the sound of his car door opening. “get in, i know you want to.” he spoke to you in that same monotone voice, almost demanding. but something about it felt — alluring. your feet made the decision before your mind could even start to process the situation. adjusting the front seat, you slipped into the back of the luxury vehicle—now seated in the back of his car, the man hovered above your seated figure.

his thumb brushed against your bottom lip, causing you to automatically part your lips. he smiled at the rapid reaction. lowering his head until his lips were mere inches away from yours. the males hand repositioned itself onto your jaw — lifting it up. your lips met, it started off slow. light pecks on the corner of your mouth. your hands coming up to grip at the half opened jacket, pulling him closer. sungchan hummed into the kiss, his free hand finding your clothed thigh. squishing the flesh, causing you to whine into the intoxicating kiss. the taste of peach still lingering on his plush lips.

drawing away from the kiss, you attempted to make out his features, the tints from his windows paired with the darkness from outside making it dim in the vehicle. your breathing rang in your ears, anticipation eating you alive as you waited for sungchan to make his next move. there was a heated silence, you knew he was burning holes into your face. “get on your stomach.”

you were quick to position your body over the middle console of the car, the console giving your lower half a boost into the air. your skirt slightly hiking up your thighs as you moved. your head lay flush with the seat, arms dangling on your sides. soreness was definitely in your future . sungchan wasted no time palming at your clothed body, hands touching whatever part of you he could. “i’ll give you the money for new tights.” the sound of your rather expensive clothes being torn down the middle, exposing your embarrassingly soaked panties. “i’ll pay for these little things too.” another rip echoed through the car, but you couldn’t bring yourself to argue. definitely not in this position. the car was rather warm, saving you the trouble of your cunt being exposed to the brutal cold.

his fingers dragged along your slit, sending chills down your spine and a whine into the leather seat, heat going straight to your cheeks. “someone seems a little excited.” his tone was dark as one of his rather long fingers dipped into your hole, your choked moans filling the interior. pumping the digit out of your cunt, sungchan slid two more in. the stretch and seer reach of his fingers sending shock waves through your body. your orgasm already threatening to take over your body, clenching around sungchans fingers.

taking notice to your growing noise, he quickly removed his fingers. a drawn out whine escaped your lips. the emptiness making your hips buck back, earning you a harsh slap on the ass cheek in response. “be patient pretty girl.” he spoke in a whisper, sucking on his fingers in between words. the sound of his hands fidgeting with his belt rang in your ears. you already felt fucked out from just a few minutes of the males fingers. your mind unable to imagine how it would feel to be legitimately dicked down by this man.

but lucky you, you didn’t have to imagine. sungchan bent over your body, whispering into your ear “hope you’re ok with me going in raw, i’ll try to pull out for you.” you weren’t given even a second to register his sentence before his hips were flush with your ass. moaning into the seat, sungchan started slow. one of his large hands deepened your arch while the other gripped onto your hips. the male groaned everytime his length disappeared into your body.

removing the hand on your back, it made it’s way to your head. gently pushing it further into the leather. the sound of shuffling and chatter could be heard from outside the doors. you recognized those voices as shotaro and eunseok. it was probably closing time now. “try to stay quiet, yeah? don’t want anyone hearing you princess.” rolling his hips, sungchans’ pace changed dramatically. going from rhythmic and sensual to brutal inna matter of seconds. “no.. don’t want taro or,” your sentence was stopped be a pitchy moan, “ seokie to hear me!”

tears painted your cheeks as you bit your lip as a pathetic attempt to hush yourself. as you tried to stay silent, sungchan was being overly vocal behind you. “fuck..” leaving his parted lips repeatedly. the windows foaming a thin layer of condensation as the vehicle gently rocked.

as sungchan rapidly abused your pussy, the knot in your stomach started to tighten. your skin heating up as your nails clawed at the mans seats. your hips lightly spasmed as your mind slowly went blank. “ ‘m gon- gonna cum!” your body felt like jelly as you creamed over his cock. “mm that’s it sweet girl.” his jet-black hair clung to his forehead as the man fucked you through your high. “but you’re not done yet..”

pleasure soon turning into overstimulation as he continued to mercilessly drill into your heat. the car being filled with the sound of your cries and sloppy noises that emerged from between your legs. sungchan was dead-set on making sure you exited this car with nothing but his dick in your mind and engraved into your walls.

you were definitely gonna need a nap after this.

note- would it be tmi if i said i almost creamed while writing this? i was feeling ditzy so i indulged in my sungchan rich man fuck me in the back of your luxury vehicle fantasy. don’t be shy to send in asks, anon is always on loves. hope you enjoyed.

[citysweet]

Omg babe thank you for helping out the elisa girlies. Idk what to request but can you write about elisa being super flirty with r because she's gorgeous? Or maybe she'd be really shy like that video of her next to Nourhene loll idk you choose.

Thanks bae ☝️

no problem love!! i did her being shy and i'll probably put out her being flirty later today!🫶🏽

一 making her nervous

♡ wc: 306

♡ the way i was already thinking abt writing this before asked is crazy

♡ also listen to i wanna be yours by arctic monkeys while reading for extra affect 🤭🤭

a recent game had just ended, you guys taking the victory, and a reporter came up to you as you were leaving the field. she asked about the game and how you keep playing after pushing through for so long. 

elisa was walking up next to you, watching as you answered the questions. she couldn't help but notice how pretty you looked. a sheer layer of sweat covering your skin and your smile wide as the bright lighting hit you perfectly. 

it really hits when you laugh, slightly bending over and it's like it all happens in slow motion. she watches the way your hair falls and feels her cheeks go pink. your hands resting on your hips when you stand straight again. 

you always had a way of unintentionally flustering her. and it just so happens the camera caught it all. (fans made edits of her fawning over u btw) her trance ends when you hold the microphone out for her and she comes back to reality.

the reporter had asked her a question, “huh?” she asks. you repeat the question for her but it seems to go over her head a second time from the way you look at her. her eyes trail over your face, admiring you in all your beauty. 

she nods, “uh..y-yeah.” mindlessly answering the question while still staring at you. but when her answer doesn't make sense it seems you and the interviewer notice her distracted state and laugh. her cheeks get darker and she laughs when you do. 

soon the interview is over and you link your arm with hers while you walk to the locker room. when you call out her red cheeks she bashfully laughs, not saying anything. 

© citysweet 9:57am 122523

一 merry christmas if you celebrate!

[satoruhour]

What do you think about gojo begging reader for a duck lmao? Maybe he wants kids but reader thinks 20 is too young so now he really wants a duck?

a/n: anon u so fuckin real for this, enjoy !!!! had lots of fun writing this / tagging my gojo luvers @jabamin @hyomagiri @crysugu @satohruu

yeah. yeah he would.

would be so eager about it too, like arent you fathering megumi and tsumiki ??? dude

my hc is that yes he took them in around 18 and you were already together with him and getting used to taking care of the two kids

but he would randomly get baby fever while seeing you be so caring and loving to the two, and not to mention for the first two years megumi usually stuck by you LMAOOO

tsumiki warms up to gojo more or less but theres still some barrier between gojo and the kids

so one day while youre both waiting for megumi and tsumiki at their school two years later he randomly announces in his annoying voice that “we should make a baby!!!!”

god the faces of all the parents waiting together with them 😭😭😭 and it’s so funny too cause it’s implied in S1 the siblings walk home together without a guardian and they would do perfectly fine without the two of you.

and bc of megumi’s usual embarrassment of gojo (and sometimes you) he tells you two to stay home cause he knows where you guys live but gojo just HAD to bring you here today bc he finished a mission nearby (lies. his fav kikufuku store opened an outlet near the school) and whats wrong with wanting to see the kids ya know

but anyway you seized his arm and slapped it just as the kids were coming out and shoved him so hard he almost fell. he fake cried that night in your arms and megumi made sure to ban you both from visiting both their schools ever again (it was right next to each other)

it doesnt seem to affect gojo much however until megumi brings home a consent slip for a farm excursion and hes like sure! he goes on the website of the farm and gets a splendid idea

well, splendid by his standards, but terrible by yours

[9:50am, delivered]: satoru i almost couldn’t find ur contact why did u change it 😭😭😭

[9:56am, satoru the bestest and coolest 🩵]: DAMN? why ??? curse me for wanting a cute name on my baby’s phone.

you literally saved me as “gojo satoru”

[9:57am, delivered]: bc thats literally ur name u fucking loser ????? 

[9:59am, satoru the bestest and coolest 🩵]: photo attached

[10:01am, delivered]: you went finding for that pic didnt you 

you’re so engrossed in the conversation (or rather, you making fun of him), pausing so intently that the person behind you has to ask you to move so you can order some damn mochi for your sweets-obsessed boyfriend. but before you can open your mouth to tell the cashier what you wanted, there’s another text that comes in and you’re torn between confusion and incredulity.

[10:01am, satoru the bestest and coolest 🩵]: also can we get a duck

[10:02am, satoru the bestest and coolest 🩵]: and NO i dont mean a fuck you dirty girl muhahah i know you thought that

eh, well, maybe you did.

[10:02am, satoru the bestest and coolest 🩵]: please pleasp eeplelasepplea

and also, you think that maybe you didn’t really want to buy kikufuku for your boyfriend anymore.

gojo is elated later when you hand him the bag of mochi from his favourite store, him still following you around like a puppy, looking almost comical with his tall figure crouching so low.

“so?”

“we are not getting a duck, satoru,” you sigh with your hands on your hips because when gojo begs like that it’s just so adorable, but the other doesn’t let up, using his blue-eyed charm on you and you hate to admit that it’s working — except maybe you would give in if it was a cat or a dog or even a hamster.

“a duck?”

gojo shoots up immediately and you’re reminded of his impending height compared to yours, “yes!”

“no!”

your boyfriend pouts again and reverts to his submission-to-you pose as tsumiki likes to call it, “pleaseee?”

you make a big dramatic out of thinking, “hm, get on your knees.”

gojo’s surprised but he does it without a second thought and you’re taken aback just a little at his obedience. if this was the way to get him to properly wash the kids’ clothes or to clean up after eating in the messiest way known to man, you’d get him to do it all the time, but you’re snapped out of your little realisation when megumi opens the door, tsumiki next to him giggling non-stop — the excursion bus probably had dropped them off on the front porch.

“what’s going on?” you’d think it was the other way round: the two siblings being the responsible adults whilst you two were acting like kids, especially with the way megumi asks the question. gojo isn’t phased.

“trying to convince your surrogate mother here,” gojo nudges his head toward you with a slight scowl on his face, “to get us a duck.” your hand lands a smack against the back of his neck.

megumi pulls a face and tsumiki only laughs even more and starts to nudge megumi with choked laughter, seeing his hands start to form a sign: his rabbit, no, divine dogs shikigami—

four ducks start materialising from shadows, crowding around the two of you and bombarding you with both quacks and playful nips on your skin and your temporary anger with your boyfriend fades, focusing on the seemingly happy faces of the ducks and the way they waddle. you’re stuck in between laughter and the softness of their feathers until—

“oh, this is their natural state, but they turn into angry, sorta scary geese on command too, although i haven’t really gotten the hang on it—”

gojo’s eyes widen, “megs, no!”

needless to say, megumi sits a little sheepishly later as he watches gojo clean up your scratches and mild wounds, getting a well-deserved (light) lecture and a kiss on the forehead later from you for discovering a new shikigami during movie night, gaining a little smile from gojo as he cuddles a sleeping tsumiki closer.

[elliesmainhoe]

Irresistible

Professor!Ellie X CollegeStudent!Reader

Summary: You and professor Ellie go on a date together.

Contents: Fluff, slight angst, reader is awkward, stigma around student x teacher relationships.

(Reader is extremely self insert in this series omg)

My Masterlist

Part 1 - Part 2 (you're here) - Part 3

••••••••••• Saturday 8th April, 7:45am

It had been five days since Ellie had kissed you and you still had your head in the clouds. You and Ellie had been texting constantly, sending messages filled with hearts and smiley faces to make up for how busy Ellie was.

Usually, you cursed the blaring alarm that woke you up on a Saturday morning, but today you were 'grossly energetic' as Dina had so nicely put it, when you were walking around the apartment's kitchen, pouring your self a bowl of cereal, with an uncharacteristic skip in your step and smile on your face.

While shovel spoonfuls of cereal and willing time to go faster a brief buzz and vibration came from your phone.

Ellie: Morning pretty girl.❤️ (7:55am)

You: Morning to you too Ells (7:56am)

Ellie: You still coming by today? (7:56am)

You: Mhm, getting ready as we speak (7:56am)

Ellie: Good. I'll see you soon then gorgeous (7:57am)

After finishing your cereal you dragged yourself back to your room, opening your wardrobe and flicking through various hanging clothes. Lots of indecisiveness later, you eventual settled on a flowy black skirt that fell down to your mid thigh, a soft knitted cardigan, sheer black tights and doc martens.

The nervous feeling increased as you looked in the mirror, would Ellie like this outfit? Would she think you look nice? This is why you didn't like having crushes, the tedious mindset of doing everything to appease someone and seeking validation through their opinion.

You adjusted your hair, applied creams and powders to your skin until you decided that you were content with your appearance. "You ready to go?" You heard Dina's familiar voice come from your doorway.

"mhm" you reply, nervousness clear in your shaky voice.

"You look beautiful babes. C'mon, Ellie will love it" she reassures, giving you a knowing smile.

"Thanks Dina" "No problem Hon, let's go"

••••••••••••• 9:00am

After a long walk and a quick stop to get coffee you arrived at the lecture hall.

"You excited Lover Girl?" Dina giggles at you, elbowing you in the side as she grabbed the doors handle, pushing the door ajar and dragging you into the last row of seats before you can reply.

This time Ellie was already here, she was sitting behind her desk in the front of the room, tapping a way at the laptops keyboard, after a few taps the large board that was mounted to the wall behind her light up, showing off a PowerPoint on a specific physics topic you couldn't even pronounce.

Ellie pushed herself up out of her swivel chair, standing up and looking around the almost full room, her eyes flickered to your form, a small smile of content painted her lips before she began speaking.

"Right so today, I'm going to go over the basics of-" she began talking, her voice commanding the chatting audience into silence and concentration effortlessly.

Her hair was in it's usual half up- half down state, her face was bare, freckled spots splattered across her face like kisses from the sun. She wore a white shirt and a blue button up over the top, rolled up to her elbows showing off the illustration that was inked into her forearm, black thigh hugging jeans and dirty converse high tops.

The way her body moved with fluidity as she pointed to things projected onto the screen was hypnotizing, the way she laughed at her own stupid puns paired with the smug grin that tugged the corner of her lips was so irresistible. Images of the other day flooded into your mind as you stared at her mouth, lips on lips, hands in hair. What you would do to be able to do that again.

••••••••••• 11:00am

After two hours the lecture began to wrap itself up, Ellie's talking came to a halt, people began filtering out the hall. Dina had began talking your ear off about theories and other things you didn't understand.

"Hey." The familiar raspy voice you recognized as Ellie sounded out from behind you, making you turn around to face her. "Hey"

"uh- I was wondering" Ellie began her hand rubbing the back of her neck nervously "If you would like to go on a date with me... Like right now...?" She muttered, so quietly you barely heard it.

"uyeah- yeah I'd really like that" you replied trying to contain your excitement and keep cool. Dina on the other hand, let out an out of character squeal. "Where are we going" you beamed, deciding on ignoring Dina.

"there's a new exhibit at the museum. I've heard its really good and I've been wanting to see it for a while... So thought I'd go with a pretty girl like you" she grinned sheepishly.

You felt Dina's excitement radiate from behind you. "Go lovebirds!!" She said pushing you forward so you crashed into Ellie's chest. Her arm wrapped around your waist like second nature, steadying your off balance body. You felt the vibrations from Ellie laugh travel through you... And god was it nice.

"C'mon... Let's get going pretty" she laughed, her hand travelling from your waist to interlocking with your hand and walking out with you.

"Have Fun! But not too much fun"

"Shut up!"

••••••••• 11:30am

It was a thirty minute drive to the museum. The ride was full of laughter, singing, music and jokes, aswell as Ellie dropping the casual compliment that made your face light up red in response.

You enjoyed those thirty minutes, but to say that you weren't relieved when you finally reached the parking lot would be a lie. The thought of Ellie's presence alone made you flustered, let alone being stuck in a confined space together.

Ellie got out the car before you leaving with a stern "stay there". You watched her as she walked around the hood of the car to the passenger seat door, opened it and offered her hand. Of course, you took it, unbuckling the belt with your free one. "Did I tell you how beautiful you look today?" She hummed, closing the door behind you and locking her car.

"No... No you didn't" "Well... You look beautiful"

Muttering a small thank you as you tried to keep your heart beat at a semi-normal speed.

"What's the exhibit we're going to themed on?"

"Dinosaurs"

"are you serious? I love dinosaurs!!! You didn't bribe Dina to tell you that, did you?"

Ellie scoffed, denying the accusation you had made against her. "Look at that. Something we already have in common, now let's get a move on, don't wanna keep the dinosaurs waiting, do we?"

She walked hand in hand with you, guiding you through the maze that you call a museum, her hurried footsteps finally came to a halt when a brachiosaurus skeleton came into view. "Here we are" she hummed, squeezing your hand quickly.

You felt her gaze burn into the side of your face, as she looked over at you, head tilted up as you ogled the multiple bones, fossils and archeological findings that were plastered around the room. "C'mon"

You both spent hours and hours, hand in hand talking about everything and anything you could think of. Ellie was everything, she was kind, smart, beautiful and you were on a date with her. It was unfathomable.

"Hey Y/N, why don't we go have a bite to eat?" She asks, breaking the brief silence you had fallen into. "Yeah, I'd like that. I think there's a café in the museum"

••••••••• 2:00pm

Lunch was amazing. The food, the company, the conversation. And you wished it had never came to a steaming halt with one sentence.

"I really like you Y/N, but I can't do this... Not now."

"What? What do you mean?" You replied, feeling the tears well in the corner of your eyes.

"This. What we have, its- it's dangerous. For the both of us. People aren't going to like it, they'll think of me as a predator and you a victim. The end of your education will be ruined- because of me and I can't let that happen"

Her hand took a hold of your cheek, swiping away the tear that had escaped your eye. "You only have three months until you graduate for good. What we have is special, really really special, and I'm not giving that up, just holding it off for a little, okay?",

You nod in reply, scared that your voice will betray you. "I'm gonna get going, call Dina to come pick me up..." You mutter, pushing your self out of the dining chair. "Goodbye Ellie"

"See you later Y/N"

---------

Part three soon I promise 🧡🧡🧡

Taglist: @aunslie @lonelyfooryouonly @strawberrysmoochesxo @daryldixonh0e @kittynnie @lovelyyevelyn @randomhoex @moonlightdivine @haerinwho @mufflaa @mial1l

Join my taglist here

NOT PROOFREAD

[maccreadysbaby]

Project: Killcode

batfamily + oc insert

tw: none

wanna read more? here’s the table of contents!

want to read the first fic in the hundred days series so you understand what’s going on here? here it is!

its his first day and b is already having issues... as his luck usually goes

also here's what the note they threw at koa said

part sixteen

❝ GHOSTS OF THE PAST ❞

MONDAY — JULY 23 — 9:57AM

KOA WASN'T KIDDING WHEN HE SAID THEIR TEACHER WAS WEIRD.

Ms. Heidi was her name, and she didn't show up for class until ten minutes after the bell rang. She didn't use the door, either, no -- she leaped through the open window from somewhere outside instead.

Judging by the look on Koa's face, it wasn't a rare occurrence.

She was wearing a Redwood Academy mandated uniform — a black pencil-skirt and blazer set, with these tall heels on her feet. Her hair was red, tied up in a weird looking, spiky updo. It wasn't as dark as Bentley's — it was orange-er than his, like Babs'. (Bentley had learned he was kind of a rarity, being born with dark red hair like that — he hadn't seen anyone else with that natural color but his father.)

She then began shooting questions off around the room rapid-fire style (which Bentley was not a fan of, by the way), asking them for verbs, nouns, adjectives, adverbs. By the end of it, she had a perfectly natural sounding story compiled of each of the words she'd been given and a perfect segway into a short lesson on a technique she called spontaneous storytelling.

The boy whose drink exploded came back to class maybe fifteen minutes later in a clean uniform — and he got a detention slip for being late. 

(Oops?)

Thankfully, after the weird spontaneous questioning and short storytelling lecture, Bentley didn't have to talk or answer anymore questions aloud — instead, they were given in-depth get-to-know-me worksheets to fill out for the remainder of the period. While they did that, Ms. Heidi played some strange jazz music from her desk and started doing some weird stretches.

Bentley may have been slightly appalled at her behavior, had he not already dealt with a teacher who was an evil murder scientist. He'd much rather deal with an eccentric weirdo.

There were lots of questions on the front and back of the get-to-know-me sheet -- about their siblings, parents, hometowns, hobbies. Bentley wondered if every school did that every year; because they'd done it at Gotham, too. 

The classroom fell silent, and he started to fill out the first blank: Your Full Name (first, middle, last.)

Bentley Thomas Whittaker-Wayne was what he put down -- because that was his name now. It still felt kind of weird, seeing it on paper, even though he was sure that was the name on all of Redwood Academy's records. Bentley hadn't known his middle name when Bruce first met him (he wasn't even aware he had any names besides his first and last, actually.) so, when he was adopted, Bruce gave him his. He couldn't even remember what they said it was before.

The second was his birthday, easy. October tenth.

The third was his birth city and state -- he put down Drew, New Jersey.

That's about when he noticed that Koa had gone really still next to him. When Bentley glanced over, his pencil was hovering just over the blank for question three, and he was staring at it hard like it was an impossible math equation. Maybe he didn't know what city he was born in?

Bentley watched discreetly as Koa continued to hesitate for almost ten whole seconds before he wrote down Adora, California, in handwriting that was purposefully messier than the rest. Maybe he didn't want her to know where he was born? It did seem like a random question for a teacher to ask, Bentley guessed.

He filled out the rest of the form fairly easily. For parents and their jobs, he put Bruce in the dad blanks, and didn't fill out the mom blanks. For siblings, he took it upon himself to painstakingly write down everybody's names in order of age: Babs, Dick, Jason, Cass, Tim, Steph, Duke, and Damian. He wrote about their pets. Damian's cow. About Nico and Asten, his best friends. His powers. And the last question was:

What is your dream job?

When he glanced over at Koa's, he was surprised to find that it said professional soccer player. 

Bentley looked back at his own paper, staring at the blank. What did he want to do with his life? He guessed he didn't know. Not really. Being a superhero sounded cool and all, but he wasn't exactly interested in fighting bad guys anymore -- not since he got saved from certain death by Future-Nico while under the alias of Robin. He thought he'd endured quite enough chaos for one lifetime, and superheroing just... didn't seem to be for him. Not with the way he unwillingly managed to find himself in life-threatening, bone-chilling situations without really even trying. 

What did he want to do with his life, if not follow in the secret Wayne-family legacy?

Bentley ended up writing I'm not sure yet, and hoped that was okay. For now.

And he made a mental note to google Adora, California.

--

His second period of the day was art. 

He and Koa had gone separate ways after leaving the English classroom — Bentley wasn't exactly sure why, maybe Koa had to use the bathroom — but with his handy-dandy campus map, he was able to find the art classroom without too much trouble. It was only two buildings away from the English building, which made him happy — he didn't quite feel like running across the entire campus again.

He made it to class just in time, and was immediately greeted by the smell of paint and something like clay. The whole room was layered in paintings and artworks from students long graduated, with two long, wide tables that streaked down the center with over a dozen seats at each. Layla, Koa, and Summer all ended up being in that class with him.

Their teacher was a guy named Mr. Lockwell, who was similar to Ms. Heidi in the sense that he was very odd. He kept going on and on about art and at one point got really emotional, then set them loose to create whatever they wanted in their own style so he could get a feel for their personalities.

Bentley drew a horrendous rendition of Titus the dog. Koa did a watercolor surfboard — which didn't turn out how he wanted, but still looked pretty cool anyways. Layla (who was apparently the next Van Gogh) drew an insanely realistic and detailed picture of a girl and a boy sitting on a rooftop watching the sunset, and Summer did some really intricate charcoal smearing-drawing-stuff. Bentley wasn't sure what the finished product was supposed to be. It looked like a big dark blob... maybe a butterfly? Apparently Koa thought it was the most amazing thing in the world, because he told her how good the blob was multiple times. (Bentley wondered how having a crush on somebody could make something so strange seem so... amazing.)

After various blobs and attempts at art were done, the bell rang, and they split to go to third period — Bentley's was Geometry.

Thankfully, the math building wasn't too far away, either. He crossed the threshold into classroom one-eighty-nine with a quiet exhale, with still a few minutes to spare before the lecture would begin.

The Geometry classroom was set up like the English one, like a lecture hall, but way less... chaotic. There wasn't much on the dark, wainscoted walls, and the only kind of decor that seemed to be in the room was the shelving that held the math textbooks. The desks were already full of students to glanced at him when he walked in. He relaxed just a little when he spotted Varian in one of the front tables, sitting alone, eating a pop-tart. (Where had he gotten more?)

At the teacher's desk at the front of the room sat a man...

 — and the world seemed to stop spinning for a minute.

At the front of the room sat a man. A man with light eyes, white hair, and a bald spot. Glasses. A man that sent Bentley a cold glance when he came through the door. The redhead went rigid, and his legs outright refused to work. He froze in the middle of the classroom, tugging on the strap of his backpack, his heart skipping and muscles twitching like a prey animal preparing to flee.

That guy looked just like Dr. Keene.

Like, actually just like Dr. Keene. Same face shape, same features in the same places, same mysterious air and heavy atmosphere about him.

He didn't look like Dr. Keene. He... it...

It was Dr. Keene.

Bentley was pretty sure he could've thrown up just then, willing it away for the sake of what minuscule dignity he had. Instead, his breathing picked up a little -- and he hoped it wasn't obvious to anyone else.

He blinked once, twice, glancing down at his phone that he managed to bring out of his pocket. His schedule had the all teachers' names on it, and he desperately searched for relief he wouldn't receive.

Keene, Theodore.

Keene.

Keene?

Bentley wasn't sure what was going on. But he was pretty sure he was starting to hear water in the pipes, and that Dr. Keene said something to him, and that he was still standing in the middle of the room. He kind of wanted to cry, but he also sort of wanted to bleed that man dry, literally, but he decided that was too violent, and his muddy brain finally settled on nothing more than staring and feeling awfully similar to how he he felt when he was ten.

He couldn't  live through that again.

Bentley jumped a mile and a half when someone touched his arm, and water roared in his head, blood.

"Whoa, Bentley, what's going on?"

The voice was soft, and quiet, and familiar. Bentley peeled his eyes off of the teacher just long enough for them to drift over and land on the person beside him.

Varian's worried brown eyes were staring back. He took a second to scan Bentley's outward appearance, and he assumed it all came back good when he looked back up at his face. "What is it, Bentley?"

Bentley breathed in. Felt like he might throw up. Heard some water roaring in the distance. "Dr. Keene..."

Varian glanced at the teacher. "Dr. Keene? That's Mr. Keene." 

Slowly, pieces began to click in Varian's head, and a physical, visual connecting of the dots rippled across his features. He moved in front of Bentley in an attempt to shield him from prying eyes — a valiant attempt, and thoughtful, too, but Varian was only slightly taller than him so it didn't really help that much. Even if it had, some of the students were craning their necks and leaning over to catch glimpses of the unfortunate soul who was on the verge of a panic attack at the front of the math classroom. (That was Bentley.)

"You went to Gotham Academy, didn't you?" Varian spoke lowly. "You're a lab meta."

When Bentley responded with only a curt nod, glancing back up at the teacher, Varian moved between him and Dr.— Mr.? Keene so he couldn't see him anymore. "Hey, Bentley, no."

Bentley was hardly able to breathe, to think, to focus, so when Varian grabbed his shoulder and tugged him back out into the hallway, it didn't take much to move him.

Apparently the math building had a lot of water and a lot of blood in it, because Bentley's head was roaring at the sound of it. Dr. Keene couldn't... he was in prison. He'd killed people. He'd... he knew Bentley's face. Bentley had been the one to bring his operation to light — and if Dr. Keene got ahold of him now... he was pretty sure giving him more superpowers would be the least of his worries.

Dr. Keene couldn't be there. Bentley couldn't be there.

Varian seemed to fumble for something to say. He was still holding onto Bentley's shoulder tightly and it didn't seem like he'd be letting go anytime soon. Bentley might've been embarrassed about the whole thing, if he could actually think straight. Which he couldn't.

He looked down at his phone that was clutched tightly in his hand — it was shaking. And he kind of felt like puking. And crying. And passing out. And all of those things wrapped up with a nice little bow was typically the feeling he got right before an anxiety attack.

"Are you gonna throw up?" Was what Varian settled on asking, because apparently Bentley looked like it.

He swallowed thickly and stared at the hardwood. "I don't know."

A moment of contemplation passed across Varian's face. "Are you gonna pass out?"

"I don't know,"

"Are you having a panic attack right now?" He questioned urgently, his grip tightening on Bentley's shoulder. "Oh, Geez, I-"

"I don't know, Varian, God, I... I don't know," Bentley muttered, bringing a hand up to rake through his hair. He had to be hallucinating, or flash-backing, or dying. He felt everything and nothing all at once.

"I heard about what happened in Gotham on the news," Varian inhaled and exhaled. Bentley opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

"That's not him. It isn't the same guy. Dr. Keene worked at Gotham — Alexander Keene. This is Mr. Keene, Theodore Keene. It's his brother. He's been working here for a long time, since before Rockie started going here, and Rockie's been here the longest. It isn't the same guy. It's okay. You're okay," Varian rambled.

Bentley raked a hand through his hair again, trying to force himself into some semblance of calm. It wasn't Dr. Keene, it was Mr. Keene. He was fine. He was not going to have a panic attack on the first day of school. It was fine. He was fine. He absolutely refused to make himself look any stupider than he already had.

He didn't have the willpower to say anything when Varian, in a last-ditch effort to make him feel better, stepped up and hugged him.

Bentley went rigid for a split second, his mind still spinning and swirling until it maybe, finally, came to rest. The hallway came back into focus, slowly, and he was able to bring his arms up around Varian in return. Why was life so hellbent on benching him at every turn?

(He would never be able to look at his math teacher in the eye again.)

--

tag list! (If you want me to remove or add you, ask in comments!)

@fleur-alise @sarcopterygiian @flyrobinflyy @gayboss-too-close-to-the-sun

@xiaonothere @skylathescholarly @beatyoutothatusernameloser

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Pairings: None

Word Count: 1,133 Words

Summary: Eclipse makes a groupchat with the other Eclipses to chaotic outcomes.

Warnings: Crack, Cursing, Caps, Death (mentioned only), Abuse (mentioned only), Minor Injury (mentioned), let me know if I should add anything else.

The Eclipses Chat: Chapter 1

8:42am

Eclipse has created a chatroom

Eclipse has named the chat to ‘Whomst The Fuck?’

Eclipse has added 9 people to ‘Whomst The Fuck?’

Eclipse: Okay, I need help? Fist of all where am I? And second how did I get here? Third, how get all your numbers at the same time?

Eclipse: …Ah fuck what the hell?

Eclipse: Hold on what?

Eclipse: Okay, I might be too high then.

Eclipse: ARE WE ALL ECLIPSE!?

Eclipse: Seems like it, buddy.

Eclipse: Okay, some of us have to change our screen names.

Eclipse: Already on it for mine.

Eclipse has changed their name to Solar

Solar: So much better.

Eclipse: How did you do that!?

Solar: Depends who I’m giving advice to.

Eclipse: Swapped dimension, Moon is the evil one.

Solar: Ah. Gotcha. So you hit the icon in the top right and it’ll say settings, click that then go to change name and change it.

Eclipse had changed their name to Orbit

Orbit: Thank god. I’m too high for this. I’m going to sleep now. Thanks Solar.

Eclipse has changed their name to God

Solar: No.

Solar has changed God’s name to Venus

Solar: None of that shit.

Venus: I hate you and your little boyfriend too.

Solar: NOT MY BOYFRIEND SHUT UP HE’S AROACE

Venus: I have better things to do than bother with you.

Venus is offline

Eclipse: Can I get help?

Solar: Who be thee?

Eclipse: … I’ll be honest I don’t know.

Eclipse: Well, are you good?

Eclipse: idk

Eclipse has changed their name to Rigel

Rigel: Hi Solar!!!!! 🥰💞💘

Solar: Hi Ruin.

Rigel: Look, I picked a name too!

Solar: I can see that, Rigel. Good job.

Eclipse: Y’all in love or something?

Solar: Listen, he just found out emojis exist. Let him have fun with them.

Eclipse has changed their name to Helix

Helix: Excuse me wtf? How did the Eclipse that started this shit get my number? I literally live in space! I didn’t even know I had a number! What!?

Solar: Ooooh, you’re the one with Lord Lunar.

Helix: Yes, I’m the one with Selene.

Solar: Interesting.

Eclipse: Can I please be helped already?

Eclipse: We don’t even know who you are!

Eclipse: I’m apparently named Eclipse!? idfk!? I’m confused too!

Helix: Start with this, pick a damn name, kid!

Eclipse has changed their name to Comet

Eclipse had changed their name to Umbra

Helix: Wait, which is which?

Comet: Someone please get me down? I feel like a cat in a tree rn. Why am I here?

Solar: That’s how we all feel, buddy. What’s wrong?

Comet: I’m currently trapped in the dark in I think a ceiling? I can’t get down and it’s dark. I don’t know where I am but I hear the daycare song.

Solar: That does not narrow it down.

Helix: Okay, so are you in a dimension where Sun and Moon are alive?

Comet: Debatably yes.

Solar: Okay so a ‘dead Moon’ universe. Alright. Getting somewhere. Is Lunar alive in this universe?

Comet: Yes.

Orbit: Are you in a universe Kill Code became good and is now dead in?

Comet: I believe so yes.

Solar: Alright that’s only three dimensions. Are Earth and Sun dead?

Comet: No.

Solar: Are one of the Blood Moon AIs and the Creator dead?

Comet: No.

Solar: Hold on a minute.

Solar: Make a loud noise rn, Comet.

Solar: Motherfucker, I HEAR YOU UPSTAIRS! Hold on!

Comet: OW

Solar: Not my fault you fell out of the ceiling head-first!

Comet: I was just made and I’m already being abused.

Solar: Oh please. Abused my ass.

Helix: Well, we are all twinks so… you do have an ass.

Solar: Shut up, Helix.

Helix: I will not be silenced and you can’t make me!

Solar: Don’t tempt me.

Orbit: Question, how did he even get there?

Solar: Fuck if I know.

Comet: I have no fucking clue.

Rigel: Scan him then. 🥰👻🫣

Solar: You know what? I didn’t think of that. Thanks Rigel.

Comet: Thanks Rigel.

9:57am

Whomst The Fuck?

Solar: Apparently remade original universe Eclipse and Comet is the result.

Comet: He gave me cotton candy. I like cotton candy. I like Solar, he’s nice.

Umbra: Wait, they what? Who did it?

Solar: Someone named Void? No other traces but it’s someone I don’t know at least.

Helix: Selene says that’s one of the six Lord Kill Codes. The asshole one specifically. Apparently he’s been recreating Eclipses from other worlds and sending them out.

Solar: What a son of a bitch.

Comet: So what do I do?

Solar: Well, you’re basically blank so welcome to the family. I’ll send you somewhere safe before someone tries to kill you.

Comet: Excuse me, what?

Solar: Yeah, Moon has a grudge so you’re gonna get poofed somewhere he won’t immediately kill you.

Umbra: Send him to me, I’m in the Toronto bunker.

Solar: Wait what?

Umbra: Hi, I’m the original Eclipse of the world I assume you’re in too. Send me my twin.

Solar: Alright, guess you’re going to Toronto, Comet.

Umbra: I have a spare bedroom I’m already setting up for you. What colors do you like?

Comet: Um

Comet: Purple

Umbra: Alright. I’ll have it set up by the time he sends you to me.

Comet: I’m so confused.

Helix: You and everyone else, Comet.

Comet: What is my life?

Orbit: Adopted at birth.

Comet: I hate everything.

Umbra: Shut up, at least you get your favorite color and a place to be safe in.

Comet: I hate everything a bit less now.

Umbra: What foods do you like, kid? Cough it up.

Comet: Cotton candy, coffee. Solar is giving me coffee and Chinese right now.

Umbra: How dare yo. That was gonna be my first thing to do with him.

Solar: You lack the already-here points on feeding the new child.

Helix: It feels like I’m on the sidelines of a custody agreement.

Umbra: You are.

Solar: You are, Helix.

Comet: Do I get a say in this or do I just get two dads?

Solar: You just get two dads.

Umbra: 50/50 custody agreement.

Umbra: Kid, what foods are you allergic to? It should be listed in your Health Information Settings in your arm computer.

Comet: It says dairy and red meat.

Umbra: Doable. Thank you. Do you have a favorite food yet?

Comet: Sweet things and Chinese food.

Umbra: Alright, kid. You’ll have sweet things and Chinese food fully stocked when you get here.

Comet: I kind of like having two dads actually.

Solar: I sure hope so, you’re forever going to be stuck in a loop of ‘go ask your father’.

Comet: I’m fine with that. As long as I keep getting candy.

Solar: Yes, you’ll keep getting candy.

[talonabraxas]

Full Moon 6° Aries – 29th September 9:57am UTC

“He who knows when he can fight and when he cannot will be victorious.” – Sun Tzu

Aries the RAM! "I AM" Talon Abraxas

[lolathelotus]

Sulani, Summer, 9:57am

[castielsparkle]

Hey uh suppose you were trying to explain the destiel mineshaft to an idiot.....how would you explain it?

alright well. going to make this archived for future destiel mineshaft historians. might as well. (also do not worry ur not an idiot and neither is anyone else that doesnt understand the context LOL it truly is something that just Broke Containment<3)

The Great 2023 Destiel Mineshaft Incident Thesis/Autopsy/Deepdive

On January 18th, 2023, at 4:04PM this post was made, and here we can cite the first instance of the use of 'destiel mines.' Not entirely a concept yet, just a phrase. But here is where it can be traced back to.

January 28th, 2023, at 11:45PM, thee "winchester derangement syndrome three meal course" groupchat is started by Ro (@destielgaysex) (Initially groupchat was under a different name but i fear divulging into the 'lore' of that would distract us from our point.) I digress;

This group consists of three tumblr bloggers:

-Ro (@destielgaysex)

-Zo (@marycentric)

-Cas/Dex (self, @castielsparkle)

Over the course of the following days they (myself, the author, included in this) continue to watch supernatural together in voice call channels in a discord server, "gay people," mentioned below.

Around 9:13PM, January 29th, 2023, voice chat is initiated.

Exact time is not confirmed.

(Unsure of exact time,) Zo (@marycentric) eventually joins the voice channel.

Some time before 1:48AM Cas (@castielsparkle) joins the voice channel.

1:48AM, January 30th, 2023, this post is made.

1:48AM, January 30th, 2023, original post is reblogged with this addition. It is important to note this addition was made in reference to the first "destiel mines" post on Jan. 18th, refer to link one in paragraph one (of thesis.)

By 1:50AM, January 30th, 2023, the first moments of primitive, conceptual worldbuilding has begun.

Containment arguably was breached at 1:48AM, January 30th, 2023, when the first post that began circulation of the night was made, then reblogged by Quin (@tchotchkedean) however, some could say true containment breach happened 1:56AM, January 30th, 2023, here.

1:57AM, January 30th, 2023, first mention of minesnipers and the 15k fics per shift (one shift ending come midnight) requirements.

1:58AM, January 30th, 2023, first mention of "the incident" (explosion and subsequent collapse of mines.)

1:59AM, January 30th, 2023, reiteration of minesnipers.

2:14AM, January 30th, 2023, President Collins is introduced. This is also the first reference of "lol whar? haha whar?" being put directly into an original "destiel mines" post. This is believed to be a reference to the post made by Al (@hoziercd) at 3:19AM on January 29th, 2023, which can be found here. (Note that this predates majority of "Destiel Mines" posting.)

2:15AM, January 30th, 2023, it's like mineshaft in here. First footage on-record of Destiel Mineshaft site.

2:17AM, January 30th, 2023, second account of further breach of containment, from Al (@hoziercd)

2:22AM, January 30th, 2023, third account of further containment breach, this time regarding Timothy @maybenextjuneillgettoloveyou. (Note further reference to "whar?"-posting.)

Sometime around but not specifically proven to be at 2:28AM, January 30th, 2023, ambience is playing in discord voice channel to make blogging more immersive and evoke more passionate emotions of Destiel Mineshaft simulation.

2:31AM, January 30th, 2023, we are informed of the Destiel Miner's wages. (And later informed their Christmas bonuses are "parallels," according to on-site source Zo (@marycentric.) However, this was later debated as refutable by other employees, upon other things.)

2:36AM, January 30th, 2023, anonymous ask is received by Ro (@destielgaysex) inquiring about Destiel Mineshaft.

2:40AM, January 30th, 2023, more containment breaching from Dean (@howldean.)

2:48AM, January 30th, 2023, 22 minute mark of mine ambience in voice channel reached.

By 3:16AM, January 30th, 2023, there were at least four other instances of containment breach. Records will remain private at this time.

3:20AM, January 30th, 2023, references to President "Omega Longarms" Collins are made, with photographic evidence to back up claims of "sightings." This reference goes further back to a redacted document taking place at 1:19AM in an omitted server (I do not have access to) in a channel I've been loosely informed is regarded as "#mishafucking."

3:28AM, January 30th, 2023, hour two of simulated mine ambience immersion begins.

3:32AM, January 30th, 2023, final record of original textpost-form containment breach, from Linh (@castielsboyfriend.)

Not listed: various posts regarding the status of the mines, accounts of which vary slightly, but that is to be expected in any traumatic group experience. Archives can be found on the prior blogs listed.

additional points;

-coining of the namesake 'winchester derangement syndrome three meal course' should be accredited to @induboistably .

-timestamps take place during EST.

Please feel free to direct message author (myself, @castielsparkle) with any further inquiry/to correct any information if necessary/provide further context. 💙

EDIT AS OF 12:53PM, JANUARY 30TH 2023; my apologies for the negligence of mentioning the Miners Rebellion of 2084.

This was brought to my attention by mineshaft veteran @tchotchkedean.

This refers to a series of events regarding the uprising of those employed by Big Destiel and by extension President "Omega Longarms" Collins. This had a ripple effect on the Destiel Mineshaft community. There are multiple firsthand accounts of the workers dodging bullets from minesnipers and trying to escape. This also includes the resulting actions of minesnipers guarding the retirement homes of the workers, in disguise.

Sources for these claims include, but are not limited to:

Source

Source

EDIT AS OF 1:01PM, JANUARY 30TH, 2023; it has been brought to my attention the name of the discord server (gay people) was mentioned in a message, this is a personal error, as i confused it's title with that of a voice channel. Revisions have been made to correct this error. Thank you @destielgaysex for bringing this to my attention.

EDIT AS OF 1:53PM, JANUARY 30TH, 2023; my apologies, in my haste to write the document i failed to mention Em (@heller-castiel) was among the mines as well. Thank you for your service!

[monaisme]

Sicktember: Day 19

#19- Hypochondriac Tendencies

Something was off. Tony was sure of it.

Yes, he’d been working on repairs to the Mark 48 before the next Avengers emergency, and trying to troubleshoot the issues with the new Starkphone for R&D, and figure out how to tweak the graphic card for their latest gaming computer simply because Peter thought it was so cool, and yes, he’d been hunched over a workbench for the better part of four hours, but this felt different.

He cast a quick glance at his wrist, intent on checking his vitals one more time via his watch, but the screen showed nothing but the time. 1:17pm.  

“What the hell, FRIDAY?” Tony called out as he pulled off the watch. “What’s this?”

“It would appear to be your most current incarnation of the Starkwatch, Boss.”

Tony exhaled slowly. He would forever regret the personality algorithms he’d slaved over for FRI. “Alright, smartass, if we’re going to play the game, my watch has stopped transmitting my stats. Do me a solid and run a diagnostic on it, would you?”

If Tony hadn’t known better, he’d have sworn there was an uncomfortable pause.

“I’m sorry, Boss.” FRIDAY replied. “Your watch is completely functional. Ms. Potts has reimplemented the “Tony Is Trying To Make Stuff Up To Get Out of Another Board Meeting” protocol and has locked down your health tracker until further notice.”

Tony scowled. “Again? I swear—I never should’ve given her that kind of access.” he grumped. “And what kind of shit name for a protocol is that anyways?”

“It’s the name Ms. Potts provided, sir.”

“I know,” he rolled his eyes and squeezed the back of his neck with his hand to provide some relief. “Just—I thought I was doing better. How long am I locked out for this time?”

“Ms. Potts has specified that the lockout run a full forty-eight hour period, sir.”

“And how many times did I actually check to deserve this?” He was almost afraid to find out.

“You’ve accessed your pulse, blood pressure, and heart rate monitor fifteen times since you entered your lab at 9:57am, sir. That, coupled with meetings set in your calendar, triggered an automatic denial of access per the protocol and Ms. Potts has been notified.”

“Perfect.” Tony bit out as he picked up a screwdriver from his workbench and whipped it across the room and into a table of scrap parts Peter would usually scavenge through for his projects. It was very seldom that he lost control like that, but sometimes Pepper wouldn’t listen and... “I keep trying to explain—!” Tony started then stopped before starting again, “I mean, what happens if I decide to have a stroke and die during the lockout?” Not that Tony expected something like that to happen, but the frustration at her lack of understanding was almost too much. He was sure she’d understood when he’d first told her, instead—

“Boss. There is a recorded message that I have been instructed to play in the event that you do trigger this particular protocol. Would you like the audio version or—”

Tony paused, then realized what FRIDAY had just said, “Hang on. What do you mean, ‘this particular protocol?’ Are there more?”

“Yes, Boss. There are three other protocols in play—”

“Nope!” Tony waved his hands in air, basically shutting FRIDAY up. “I don’t want to hear it. I’m done. But I swear, FRI, if something happens, on your head be it.”

“As you wish, thought it should be noted that you did not provide me with a head, Boss, and I’ve queued the audio clip. Would you like me to play it for you now?”

Tony dropped his head in defeat. “Sure thing, just keep the volume reeeeeal low, okay?”

“Understood.” FRIDAY replied. “And, if this is any comfort to you, in the event that you do lose consciousness anywhere on Stark Industries property, I can notify emergency medical personnel immediately.”

“Gee, that makes me feel so much better,” Tony snarked. “Or I could just, you know, have access to a vital feature on my own personal device.”

“I’m afraid you’ll need to discuss that with Ms. Potts.” FRIDAY stated as a matter of fact. “But while the audio message is playing, I am also to remind you that your presence is required in Ms. Potts’ office at two o’clock this afternoon for a progress check-in with the various team leaders for the Research and Development Department.”

Tony glanced over to his work bench and the projects screaming for completion. “Perfect.”

“As well, today is ‘lab day’ and Mr. Parker is expected to arrive at the tower at four o’clock.  Would you like me to place your standard pizza delivery at an appropriate hour, or would you prefer for Mr. Parker to choose something when he arrives this afternoon?”

Tony perked up immediately at the mention of his favourite teenager.  “Is it Tuesday already? Hot damn! Maybe I’ll be able to force myself to get through this meeting after all! Four o’clock, you said?”

“Yes, Boss.”

“An end to this miserable day is in sight! Yes! And I think I’m feeling a little cheeseburgery today. Why don’t you order something for us from that little diner Pete’s scary friend likes instead of pizza? Grab an extra couple of orders of fries and a chocolate milkshake so he can dip ‘em like the weirdo he is, too. Got it?”

“Got it, Boss.”

Tony glanced at his near useless watch. 1:33pm. There was just enough time to deal with the Starkphone before Pepper jumped down his throat again.

And at least there was a light at the end of the tunnel.

/-/-/

While he wasn’t one hundred percent positive, Tony was pretty sure he was dying. All he had to do was keep upright in the elevator, get back to the lab and breathe a little and hopefully things would settle like they had the last time Tony’d had a—

Nope.

Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropists did not have—

The elevator door opened and he stumbled out, loosening his tie and taking off his sunglasses as he approached the door. He pressed a thumb to the biometric scanner and almost wept when he heard the lock disengage. He could make his way across the lab to the couch, lie down for a bit, try to figure out how he could make the laundry list of impossible tasks that the R&D folks were demanding of him happen even though he was the freakin’ boss while also figuring out how to manage his Avengers tasks as the decidedly not-boss and then let his body figure out how in the ever lovin’ hell it was supposed to draw in oxygen again.

“Mr. Stark?”

“Shit!” Tony clutched his chest as he flinched and lost his balance as he threw himself back into the workbench he’d been set at only hours before and knocking the components of his Mark 48 onto the floor. The clatter had Peter ducking for cover while covering his ears against the crash.

It registered a beat too late.

Peter. 

He couldn’t be here. He couldn’t see Tony—not like this!

But it was too late. Peter knew.

The boy approached his mentor tentatively. “Uh, Mr. Stark? Are you okay?”

And wasn’t that the question of the hour?

Tony fumbled with the sunglasses still in his hand, trying to put them on but gave it up when he realized his hands were shaking too much. Instead, he simply plastered on his ‘Tony Stark Media Star’ smile and stuffed his hands in his suit jacket pockets. “I’m fine,” he answered in a totally convincing, not weird at all sort of way.

“Are you sure?” Peter gave Tony a once over. “You’re looking a little—funny?”

“Ouch,” Tony patted his chest, played up to the bit, “way to get me right here, kid. I’ll have you know I’ve been on People’s ‘Sexiest’ list for twelve years running.”

“Be serious, Mr. Stark.” Peter stared, unimpressed.

“Bigger ouch. Tough crowd.”

Peter crossed his arms and waited for an explanation, and when none came, he spoke up again. “I know you think it’s creepy when I do this, and I’m really sorry about it, but, uh, your heart rate is sorta’ fast. Have you had Ms. FRIDAY scan you yet today?”

Tony’s faux-grin dropped and he shook his head, ‘no.’ “What do you mean exactly?” Of course his heart was racing, but what if Peter had heard something else?

Peter shrugged, “I’m not sure what I’m hearing, Mr. Stark,” Peter replied. “Ms. FRIDAY?”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Parker. I am unable to access the protocols necessary to do as you’ve requested. I could suggest bringing Boss up to the med bay for evaluation if you are concerned.”

Peter didn’t bother to ask why the AI couldn’t do something she was more than capable of on any other occasion. And Peter knew Mr. Stark well enough that he would not appreciate being dragged all over the tower and risk being seen. No way. But Mr. Stark needed help and Peter was apparently the only one who could offer it.

He scanned the lab, looking for anything. The AED was sitting prominently on the wall next to the wash station, but that wouldn’t do them any good. And the first-aid kit was stocked to the gills with anything one would want or need for burns, bruises, stitches, and anything else that a little gauze and tape could patch up, but this?

And then his eyes fell on his backpack. “Got it!” he exclaimed, and then Peter was across the room, tossing textbooks and notebooks out of the bag and onto the floor so he could grab his mask and put it on.

“What? What are you--?” Tony panted out as he gave up on pretending.

Peter tugged up the sleeve of his sweatshirt and fussed with his own official Stark brand wristwatch for a few seconds before it came off then pressed it to Tony’s wrist. “Karen, can you take a comprehensive reading for me, please? Tell me what we’re dealin’ with?”

Tony almost sagged in relief. Such a clever boy.

Tony couldn’t hear her reply. “Of course, Peter.”   

The two stood awkwardly together while Peter listened to Karen’s diagnostic results and then Peter offered a, “Thanks, Karen,” then put his watch back on and pulled off the mask.

Tony was still trying to get his breathing under control.

Peter waited a second before he said anything, and then blurted out, “Did you know that butterflies can taste with their feet, Mr. Stark?”

Tony blinked, played back what the kid had said in his head and then blinked again. “What?”

“Yeah, they use something called chemoreceptors. Apparently it helps them identify plants.” Peter said, completely sincere in his offering. “Cool, huh?”

Tony thought about it before he drew in a bigger breath and answered back, “I guess so?”

“And owls don’t have eyeballs—they have eye tubes.”

Tony just shook his head. “That sounds kinda’ gross, kid. I call bullshit.”

Peter paused for a second and shrugged. “Maybe? MJ had us all looking up weird animal facts in the cafeteria at lunch today and there was a list. Now that I think about it, I should be doing a better about confirming stuff like that before spreading it around.” Peter tossed his mask over to the backpack where the rest of his suit was hiding, then pulled his phone out. “Wanna check on the owls while I do the butterflies?”

Tony didn’t have the energy to do much else. “Sure.” At least his hands weren’t shaking as much when he pulled his own phone out.

They made their way the few steps to the couch and sat in what had fast become their designated ends and became absorbed in their tasks. Not that it took long for them to find what they’d been looking for.

“Well, I’ll be damned.” Tony muttered. “Eye tubes are apparently a thing?”

Peter popped his phone back into his pocket, “And so are tasting feet. Nature is weird.”

“Agreed. I’ll take metal and tech over eye tubes any day of the week.”

 And then neither of them said anything... until Peter broke the silence a few minutes later.

“Do we need to run a diagnostic on Ms. FRIDAY, tonight?” he finally asked. “I mean, she should have caught that, right?”

Tony sighed and let out a long, slow breath. “FRIDAY is working just fine, kiddo.” Tony put an arm around Peter’s shoulder to reassure him and leaned back into the couch. “I imagine Pepper got a little frustrated with my insanity and figured she needed to shut me and my hypochondriac tendencies down.”

Peter had to process that for a second. “Uh, but you literally just needed FRIDAY and you couldn’t access her? Wouldn’t that mean that she’s actually trying to kill you?”

Tony barked out a laugh. “No, Pete. I’m pretty sure she’s just pissed off, though we’ll definitely need to have a chat about adjusting some parameters, I think.”

They got quiet again, and then, “Well, pissed off or not, that wasn’t very kind of her.” Peter slapped a hand over his mouth as he expressed an opinion he had no business in holding.

“It’s okay, Roo. Right now, I don’t disagree.” Tony closed his eyes as he melted further back. Panic attacks took a lot out of him. “But I can understand where she’s coming from, I guess. I have a job to do—and it’s not like I haven’t given her reasons to get irritated with my ‘behaviour’ in the past.”

Peter didn’t look impressed. “If she loves you, it shouldn’t matter.”

This kid was too pure. “Nah,” Tony opened his eyes and tilted his head to look over at him. “Even I can agree that I’m a little much sometimes... and by a little, I mean even my parents didn’t really like me so I’ll take what I can get when I can.” Tony chuckled at his own joke.

“Mr. Stark!” The indignance on Peter’s face, that someone couldn’t love their own child. “No way! I don’t believe you! And even if I did believe you, that doesn’t justify—”

Tony put a hand up to halt the tirade he was working up to. “Kid, you’ve read the biography, right?”

Peter nodded, ‘yes.’

“So you know Pep has been dealing with my crazy for a long time. First, the palladium poisoning,” he started. “Granted, I was hiding the fact that I was technically dying from everyone but I’d been so diligent about tracking saturation points and trying to find a balance with my diet and anything else I could think of.” Tony huffed a laugh, “You know, it’s actually one of the reasons the Starkwatch was so ahead of the competitors when we’d first released it. I’d already done all the field testing for myself. Using it to buff up or tech marketing was a no brainer, and Pepper was happy.”

“But—”

“Peter.” Tony cut him off yet again. “It’s okay. I haven’t even gotten started about these damned panic attacks.”

Peter did not think any of this was okay. He chewed at the inside of his cheek, obviously thinking of what he was going to say next.

That it bothered Peter so much bothered Tony more than he’d thought it could. “It’s really, well... I’m fine now—and this is all stuff for the grownups to deal with anyways.”

Peter glared. “I’m fifteen,” his cheeks flushed, “and I know what it’s like to be scared for reasons that make sense and still make no sense at all.”

Tony saw that this wasn’t sitting well with Peter, and he was working himself up to say something important, so Tony bit his tongue.

Peter Benjamin Parker had the floor.

“When I was little, I had a really hard time after my parents died.” Peter blurted out. “Like, a ‘I wouldn’t leave May or Uncle Ben because I was afraid they’d die if they left my sight’ kind of hard time.” His eyes widened in his own panic as he realized what he’d just blurted out.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Tony said softly, sitting forward to give the kid his full attention now that he could draw a full breath.

“Yeah, thanks,” Peter almost brushed the condolences off. “But there’s more. You see, Aunt May had a nurse friend who’d been gifted a new stethoscope by her family. Aunt May had told her friend about me and what was goin’ on, and between the two of ‘em, they came up with a plan. The friend gave Aunt May her old stethoscope for me to use, so I could double check that everyone I worried about was okay whenever I was scared.”

Tony’s heart melted a little. This poor kid. “Peter.”

But Peter shook his head to stop him and shrugged. “It’s okay now, I promise.” He said it in such a way that Tony wondered if it wasn’t really, but Peter kept going, “I’m just thinkin’ what it would have been like if someone decided that I was being dumb and needed to be done checking on everyone before I was ready to stop on my own, is all. So I get it.”

Huh.

“Besides, panic attacks are no joke, and maybe Ms. FRIDAY would have caught it earlier if you were being monitored?”

 He wasn’t wrong.

“Just—It bugs me that it happened, and I’m sorry that someone did that to you, and I’m especially glad I could loan you my stethoscope today.” Peter bumped into his mentor affectionately. “Have I mentioned how much I love my steth—I mean AI lately?”

And Tony’s heart swelled at the sincere affection.

... Maybe it was time to have a different kind of conversation with Pepper?

FRIDAY broke the moment when she spoke up, “Boss, your dinner delivery has just arrived in the lobby. Would you like me to have someone from security bring it up to you?”

Tony heaved what must have been his millionth sigh. “Yeah, FRI, thanks,” and then he looked over to Peter. “Wanna check out that graphics card I was telling you about after dinner?”

[cantsleephomesick]

you tell me not to dwell on my sadness

it is 9:57am

and i feel everything but alive

sadness is all around me

you know that right