#27 LaYeRs BitChEs

[helloliriels]

PROTECT THE HIVE - The Beekeeper fan edit by helloliriels

Have this [🐝🐝🐝 yes, I finally watched it 🐝🐝🐝] What can I say? I'm here for Jason Statham and any kind of disaster ... 😏😎🤘

@johnlocky @fluffbyday-smutbynight @whatnext2020 @totallysilvergirl @anyway-kindness @jawnn-watson @gaylilsherlock @topsyturvy-turtely @gregorovitch-adler @sarahthecoat @bluebellofbakerstreet @chriscalledmesweetie @keirgreeneyes @lisbeth-kk @wizama @john-smiths-jawline @kittenmadnessandtea @kitten-kin @jobooksncoffee @a-victorian-girl @ninasnakie @dragonnan @sgam76 @janetm74 @thetimemoves @thegildedbee @friday411 @ghostofnuggetspast @kettykika78 @calaisreno @discordantwords @raina-at @meetinginsamarra @arwamachine @loki-lock @theofficialinternetloner @actually-a-girls-name @maiaemerald @wssh13 @jolieblack @missdeliadili @masterofhounds @peanitbear @peageetibbs @zira-and-crowley @justanobsessedpan @7-percent @inatshej @iwlyanmw @forfucksakejohn

[jiminjamms]

sex therapy :: 29. karma's a bitch

chapter tags/warnings: manipulative! naoya. naoya's anger issues continue. infidelity/adultery. extremely strong language. corruption. mentions of physical violence. family drama.

word count: 3.2k

notes: my sixty-hour work weeks have been taking a huge toll on me, so i apologize for this incredibly slow update. the good news is that i cannot take this corporate america bullshit anymore and will resign in the next two months. thank you for being patient! likes, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated. xoxo

fic masterlist | 01. 02. 03. 04. 05. 06. 07. 08. 09. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33.

Naoya had never felt this humiliated in his entire life.

When people said karma was a bitch, he never thought that it would actually make its way back to him. While he was not the most righteous person in the world, he was the Zenin CEO, for god’s sake! He was the leader to a multi-billion dollar conglomerate, the heir of a centuries-old bloodline. 

Yet, here he was, charging back to his apartment like an irate animal.

He startled the lobby doormen upon his loud entry, and once he returned to his penthouse, he had to will every muscle in his body not to tear apart his abode in a rampage.

In his head, his encounter with Toji looped like a broken record, fueling his chagrin.

When Naoya sought to confront his cousin for the first time in months, he thought he had been prepared. He did not expect to end up digging himself into a deep hole surpassing the world's layers due to a judgment error—a slight miscalculation. 

Correction: this miscalculation was anything but 'slight' because he wildly underestimated what felt like everything. Now, he bore the consequences of his mistakes after inadvertently turning himself into a laughingstock. Because his ego was his hamartia, he had become a mere jester in a story where he was meant to be the sole hero, and thus his ill feelings burned hotter than the surface of the Sun.

As much as he hated to admit this, Naoya had been shortsighted. He should have known better. Just weeks ago, he saw a vision filled with saccharine promises of a happy, comfortable life as the most powerful man in Japan imbued with power and wealth. He had been confident—a hundred percent certain—that absolutely nothing could go wrong in the trajectory he worked hard to create. But, what the actual fuck just happened at the therapist's office?!

He did not expect his mistress to make a complete fool out of him. Her very existence was an anathema to him, and he hoped to never be in contact with that woman ever again. In hindsight, Naoya should have taken the hint a while ago. He had previously forgiven his cousin's ex-wife, dismissing her blissful but intentional ignorance. Mari had never been too keen on actual intellectual and corporate matters, for she took far more interest in the money and comfort that came with starting from the bottom and sleeping her way to the top. Despite that, Naoya trusted that she at least had half the mind to not publicly discuss their affair, only for him to be proven wrong in front of none other than...Toji Fushiguro.

"Fuck!" Naoya screamed into the void of his empty living room. His reality was a nightmare as he thought about his despised cousin again—the assured gleam in his viridescent eyes, the smug smirk that tugged across his lips. The imagery soured his mood beyond measure. "I'm going to fucking—"

He did not finish his sentence.

Instead, he kicked a nearby lamp in an angry bout, toppling the fixture over and sending tiny shards cascading across the floor accompanied by the dull thud of the shade. Whatever. His housekeeper tomorrow morning would come in and clean that. 

What he instead focused on was how he had never been this infuriated, this belittled, this undignified.

The entire apartment echoed with Naoya's loud huff.

'About ‘your wife’ or whatever you want to deem her, there is not a single chance in hell that she’d ever think about calling you her husband anymore.' These words from Toji affected him more than he would have liked.

What did he mean?

That bastard is bluffing, the blonde had to tell himself, yet even he could not believe in his own consolation.

He needed to do something about this. 

No, no, Naoya wasn’t scared.

He couldn’t possibly be, right?!

Yet, after he could feel his ears begin to cool and breathing start to re-regulate, he stared at the emptiness in his halls as he came to the realization that had no better choice but to talk to you.

You didn't want to be here.

The moment you read Naoya Zenin's text to meet up for a 'quick chat' at the café near his office, you already knew that the upcoming conversation was going to be anything but 'quick.' The last thing you wished to do was to be in the same vicinity as that very man again.

After spending the last few days at your family residence, you had been showered with warm attention from aunts, uncles, cousins, and even house attendants who—despite naturally wondering the reason behind your stay—welcomed your visit with open arms. To your relatives' many inquiries, you forged a pretense that all was well even if all was not. (Besides, all did seem well in your family estate, away from the incessant pandemonium that was the Tokyo city center.)

While you knew that this peaceful break was not meant to last forever, you did not anticipate returning to the capital just to sit with the Zenin CEO alone.

Naoya had specifically chosen a corner table in the Hong Kong-inspired establishment, distanced from potential eavesdroppers. He seemed to have been waiting for a while by the time you arrived, his right leg crossed over his left knee as he twiddled with his thumbs impatiently. Sprawled on the table were a freshly brewed pot of jasmine tea and a platter of warm custard pastries.

He remained quiet as you took the seat across from him, observing with a crease on his forehead and a knit to his brows.

Anyone could tell that the blonde was not the least bit happy.

"Giving me dirty looks is not going to get this conversation anywhere," you pointed out while helping yourself to a tart.

From your comment, the inverted slope on Naoya's lips twisted into a deeper frown. 

He did not understand where your annoyance came from. 

Fine, he never treated you nicely either, but he did not expect you to snap at him when the discussion had hardly begun. You offered him no greetings, and Naoya also took great offense at how you chose not to look at him as you talked.

Truth be told, your neglect reminded him of all the other upsetting things that he was dying to bring up, and your unpleasant attitude whittled away the little restraint he had left.

“You didn’t try to ask where I’ve been. Not one text or call. Guess it would not have mattered to you if I disappeared, huh?" he lashed out through gritted teeth. He hated being forgotten, hated being looked over, and hated how easy it was for him to prove you to be a neglectful and apathetic wife.

Which was why there was no better option than to cut him off.

“You ordered me to leave you alone, Naoya.” Only slightly did you turn your head to glance at him. Stirring sugar into your tea, you kept your attention otherwise on the nearby window and watched businesspeople scurrying about on the streets on their lunch breaks. "You can live without my attention since I'm not the only woman you have around. What happened to your lady friend? Hasn't she been entertaining you long before our marriage? I am sure she would love your company, so why not pay her an impromptu visit?”

From a slanting angle, you could tell that the transformation from your normally calm demeanor dismayed him. Naoya, not you, was typically the one to make snide comebacks, but he could not deny your latest comments. Evidently, he wanted you to go back to your submissive and passive self, but that was precisely what you no longer could be for him.

His silence prompted you to reach into your purse and retrieve a thick manila envelope, and you presented the package on the table.

Naoya's gaze snapped to the parcel. 

He was curious, but cautiously so. He had invited you here, expecting to control the narrative, to dictate the terms. As a result, your unexpected move threw him off balance. 

"What...?"

“Take a look and find out for yourself.”

A puzzled Naoya demonstrated no hesitation.

He snatched the folder, tearing the top open and greedily grabbing the curated pieces inside. He stared for a long time at the first item: a photo. But he recognized the image of him and his mistress, boarding a private jet for their most recent trip to Mexico. Then, he flipped through the stack rapidly, barely registering each item before he turned to the next. Some were printed-out pictures and others were cutouts from news articles, but all featured him and his paramour. The confusion on Naoya's visage slowly morphed into aggravation, and when he finished his inspection, he forcefully threw the items back onto the table.

In the end, Naoya sat back and went still, not even blinking, thinking, or doing anything but pressing his tongue along his inner cheek. "How did you get these?"

No apologies. No remorse.

Hell, based on his response, the man could not even bother to deny your accusations, a telling sign of how little he could care for his relationship with you. Obviously, you must be a joke to him.

In one firm motion, you placed down your teacup.

"You're missing the point.”

While one's eyes may be the windows to the soul, Naoya's offered nothing in his current state. His pupils looked at—no, examined you in intense dark pools despite the iridescent glow from the lights above.

"Toji gave you these, didn't he?" Naoya continued with a disdainful laugh, himself insistent on getting answers to his own questions. "You can't find this shit on the internet anymore since I've had them all taken down. But Toji's fast. He has eyes everywhere, I know he does. Look at him. Months later, and he's still hung up on reclaiming a position he should've never had the right to in the first place!"

Thankfully, you didn’t flinch from his loud voice. What you did do was become more indifferent as if you were placing a wall to separate yourself from him, mentally bracing for his emotional maelstrom.

"You are missing the point," you said once more. This time, you shook your head in disappointment, and your tone was far more frustrated than the last. "Aren't you shameless?”

"Me? Shameless?!” His brows pinched closer from fury. "Take a look at yourself, woman! What did you do to get all this dirt from Toji and his henchmen, hm? Ha! Know what? I bet it’s because you're so willing to spread yourself for them,” he rambled with a nasty sneer plastered on his expression. At his comments, your jaw fell open before snapping shut as the meaning behind his words sank in. The way this man disregarded how he had an affair (that began many months ago!) only to redirect the spotlight onto you was repulsing, implying that the sole reason the therapists talked to you was that you had slept around. “A whore like you love taking all them all, don’t you? Well? Well? Am I right? Goddamn, you’re such a—”

The harsh scraping from your chair as you stood was what finally interrupted him. Unable to tolerate his vilification, you counteracted his anger with the venom in your rancorous glare. 

"How dare you talk about me like that!”

In the meantime, prying eyes started to turn in your direction from the commotion: teenage girls, sharing nervous glances across their table; a lone businessman, stopping mid-sip from his cappuccino; even the barista, pausing mid-grind such that her arm froze inches from the hopper.

"That man...doesn't he seem familiar?" a distant voice asked.

"Is he a celebrity or something?"

"No, wait. He's the person on the cover of last month's Fortune magazine. Naoya Zenin!" another replied.

"Isn't that lady his wife?"

While the onlookers' curious glances turned into full-on stares, their regard steeled your resolve rather than bothered you. Instead, you wanted the crowd to take in the spectacle. Corrupt tricks and dirty money had long painted the Zenin heir as 'the most perfect man in Japan,' and the public deserved to understand the fraudulence and cruelty that underlaid his facade.

"For months, I trusted you. I respected you. I put aside the harrowing loneliness weighing on my heart all because I tried to understand you. You told me that finding the time or energy for our marriage was not easy because board meetings kept you late in the office or business meetings required you to spend several nights abroad. Fine! So, I had been patient. But," and your voice overflowed from anger as you pointed a shaking finger at the pictures on the table, "Taking another woman to Michelin restaurants for dinners? Spending nights with her at Ritz-Carltons and Four Seasons? Going on entire vacations with her across the Pacific? All while you had a wife at home? Are you out of your fucking mind ?!" 

The man's nose flared with deep-seated rage, his eyes mirroring the same bitterness in yours. "At the end of the day," he began sternly, "we're still married."

Ridiculous.

“On paper, ” you had to clarify. "Otherwise, you wouldn't be cheating on me with your older cousin's ex-wife."

Immediately, louder murmurs rippled through the crowd. Naoya turned stiff, uncomfortable with the attention. So much for selecting a quiet corner in the café. He wasn’t stupid enough to sense that he had to be careful. Saying one wrong phrase would condemn him to a public meltdown. 

However, you were already steps ahead of him when you loudly declared: “I’m filing for a divorce.” 

That caught him off guard.

Your announcement even drew audible astonishment from bystanders as they stopped their meals, turning to each other and drawing out their phones.

In literal milliseconds, the vexation once riddling Naoya's demeanor shifted into denial.

“No. We’re not going to talk about a fucking divorce right now. We’re going to fix what we have, and you’re going to come back to me. We’re...We're married for a reason, and we’re going to keep with it!”

"That's a bullshit reason,” you had to snap. “Listen to yourself. Do you hear how selfish you sound!?" At this point, nothing could hide your bafflement. "Naoya, you were the one who said that if I wanted to leave this marriage badly, then I should leave. Ask Mai and Maki! They heard the entire conversation. Didn't you also say that you didn't give a fuck anymore?"

The man attempted to salvage some semblance of control. "I was just joking!"

"No, you were not." Picking up a photo of Naoya and Mari together, you pressed the picture to his face. “How much more can I take? How many days would I still have to go through alone in the penthouse, all because you would be spending your sweet time with the woman that you love?”

Unloading all this emotional baggage, not only for Naoya Zenin but also for the café spectators to hear, took courage. Previously, you would have let the burden gnaw at your soul. You would have rather wallowed in suffering rather than even think about speaking up.

But the past was the past, and you had grown immensely since then. Currently, you were stronger, more confident. You knew that, in Toji's words, you deserved better. Life was too beautiful to waste on a man who did not love or respect you and, with that in mind, you relaxed your clenched fists with an exhausted and fatigued sigh. 

You broke me first, you said through a deserted gaze. 

Naoya Zenin was the reason why you had become the way you were: a cold, seemingly heartless wife who cared none for her husband. The misery that he placed on your shoulders finally reached its limit, and while you could forgive, forgetting the memories in your scarred heart would be a task over months, years, and even a lifetime. 

“Listen,” you began, tone terse, “this divorce will set you free. Mari is the person whom you need—”

“The hell. No!” the man interrupted in a violent outburst, taking your breath away as he slammed the table and hissed. “I don't give a damn about her right now! We’re…We’re over!" he snarled with incredible anger such that he almost appeared to growl. "I don’t need her, I need you! That...That whore doesn't give a flying fuck about my shit! All she cares about is...is...Fuck this. All she wants is the money. Why else do you think she married and then later divorced Toji? She doesn't want to hear about all the shit in my family because she had not been brought up to deal with all the fuckin' drama in my household. She can't understand because, unlike you, she wasn't born with a silver spoon shoved down her goddamn throat!"

Quietly, you absorbed his words, stunned.

So this was how their relationship had been.

You had not expected him to reveal all these entrenched feelings willingly, but his concoction between reckless rage and sheer desperation had allowed him to spill the ugly side of this extramarital affair. Naoya could not afford to lose you, and not just because this marriage solidified the respect of those around him. While Mari offered him an outlet for physical indulgence, only you could offer the cornerstone to Naoya's mental and social fortitude.

“So you ‘need’ me now, but what happens when you find another reason to hate me again? What will you do if you don’t think I can fulfill the role you want me to have as your partner? Or if you wake up one day and suddenly want your cousin’s ex-wife again? Or if you meet another woman? Am I supposed to stand there again, and watch this all happen?" 

No answer.

The fact that he couldn't respond hurt.

"My decision is final. Looking back, I despised every single second married to you. In fact, I feel sorry for myself. The fact that I blindly put up with your manipulation, betrayal, and blame for all these months.” With your belongings collected, you prepared to leave. “You would be stupid to think you're the only one with options, you know.”

Only when you turned around did Naoya react, scrambling to his feet.

“What the fuck are you—”

In any other situation, he would have grabbed you, lunged at you, did everything in his power to stop you from going. Yet, given all the witnesses, all he could do was call you back like a helpless child, trying his best to not escalate the scene (although, at this point, even passerbys outside have stopped by the window to spectate).

"Hey!" Naoya called after you. “Hey! I’m still talking with you!”

Pathetic, really, to see him desperately beg for you to stay in his life.

There was a certain satisfaction in finally having the control at your fingertips. The feeling was empowering—electrifying, even—and you became so focused on the gratification that you barely registered Naoya's last question.

“Where are you going?”

At this point, you already stood by the exit.

“That’s not something that my soon-to-be ex-husband would need to know,” and you hardly gave him another glance as the door closed behind you. “Thank you for showing me everything I hope to never find in another man again."

last chapter || next chapter

end notes: Part of why this update took so long was because I wanted to have an encounter between Naoya and Y/N to showcase Y/N’s development, from someone who thoughtlessly defended her husband to someone who could stand up for herself (all while alone!). I envisioned this interaction many times, and I thought about different ways to approach the scene, the delivery, the dialogue, the choreography, etc. It took me a while to go for what I currently have. Thank you for reading!

taglist: @dissociatingdiva @httpsplanetmarsdotcom @nemoyr @huangfairy @shadowarchon @203steph @agentdedf1sh @cloudybabes @lynn-writes-things @illicitwriter @7oji @kikuchimi @chaoticjojofan @musicisme333 @kumocchin @s-guru @mwahilovemylife @hey-gurls69 @cloudsinthecosmos @moon-mumu-moon @kazscara @skilerfrostfairy @funicidals @nico707 @proteovaldez @tsukiyohanayome @marimoares @qirbys @puffaloxx @sakanoshitaa @arizzu @kissditrio @lewd-bunny14 @mistyheart @szired @supsii @yvy1s @lazyassfinals @katkbc @tokyometronetwork @downtown-roponggi @the-cosmos-network

[13thdoctorposts]

Michelle Gomez Panel

Please note this IS NOT word for word, but so you can get a general gist of the panel. Both Michelle and Sacha were hilarious.

Whovians of all ages got to ask Michelle questions.

This post is just Michelle’s panel I’ll make separate posts for them together and Sacha’s panel soon!

How’s your New Zealand accent?

Bad I only have one and it’s Scottish I’ve been working on it my entire life… so 27 years. Lol

What was your favourite episode of Doctor Who to film?

I went to set and there was an army Daleks of every variety, and I stuck my 8 year old son in one and they started filming and I didn’t know were he was just that he in was in a Dalek.

Would you like to be in the new series of Doctor Who?

Hell yes, I’m just waiting for the call.

In Who and Sabrina you play a define feminine who was wronged by others what was your motivation to play these kind of villains?

With my face it’s hard not to plays witches and bitches and I long to play a character called Alison but Madam it is. I want to make sure I’m not just playing bad, I believe people are the way they are because of their experiences, so what makes them bad? That’s what interests me in the characters.

Did you like sitting on the throne of hell in Sabrina?

I loved sitting on it and wish I could have taken it home, I would have made room for it.

Did you Ad lib much in Doctor Who?

Steven Moffatt is a phenomenal writer so there’s not much you could add to it. But sometimes on the day something would fit. But Moffatt wrote to my strengths so I didn’t feel I needed to.

Why did you want to help the Doctor?

There’s a thing called a frenemy, keep your enemy’s close. They were originally friends and like all relationships they go through good times and bad times and sometimes they go their different ways. The master went to the dark side and the Doctor went to that other side. I was trying to bring in the nuance to that relationship

If you make it to the new series will you still help the Doctor?

No

If you put Missy and Lilith in a room together would they plot world domination or try to kill each other?

I think they would try each others costumes on. Once I wanted to bust of of Missy’s costume and it was hot so I took the top layer off and thought I’d just wear the petty coats in the scene, and Steven Moffatt was like… what are you doing? This is a children’s show, put your clothes back on. Lol. Lilith got lots of incredible costumes.

Being the last of the Timelords do you think the Master and the Doctor ever had a child?

Wow, I don’t know, I’m not sure the Doctor and the Master have those bits. They’re like Barbie and Ken. The first thing you do with a figurine of yourself is check.

What would you have changed about Missy’s costume?

I don’t think it could have been more Missy, it was a phenomenal image. It sent the message that Mary Poppin’s was the most evil woman in the Universe. There was a corset and after lunch I did hate the costume.

How did you get the role of Missy?

I was offered another part but I was doing psycho bitches at the time so I wrote to Steven Moffatt if you need a villainess I’m your man. Then a couple months later my agent called, said to sit down and that Steven was offering me the role of the Master, I was blown away. I might have planted the seed, I’d like to take credit for it.

If you could travel with any other Doctor and torment them who would it be?

Tom Baker

Do you like being the villain of Doctor Who?

I do. If anyone is listening I do, I would like to come back, stop fucking around, I’m available.

There’s episodes with multiple Doctors why can’t we have multiple Masters?

Because there’s only one! Although Sacha is quite good, I like Sacha.

Were you nervous the first time you were on TV?

Yeah, that was a long time ago on a show called The Bill and I played a ticket warden. The director said to do a banana around the car and slap a ticket on the window. I didn’t know what a ‘banana’ was so I acted like I was slipping on a banana, landed on the ground, the crew looked at me and I just jumped up and they told me what I actually needed to do.

What was your favourite part of being chaotic and fun with your Missy?

They let me piss about with focus, I could be physically free, I could dance and bounce a lot.

Can you share a funny moment on Doctor Who?

I was nervous, it was my first day, Peter and Jenna were there, when I get nervous I over compensate so I grabbed Peter, it’s like I go into some kind of black out, I threw him against the wall and snogged him, had my hand behind my back, because I knew that would make a nice visual, Jenna Coleman took my hand, that was my first 5 mins, it was weird.

What was it like being on set with Peter?

When I was younger I’d see Peter around and he was so cool like the David Bowie of paisley. And I looked up to him. When we started working together I felt like I already knew him, we had an instant short hand, so we crack each other up.

Shouting from the back…

Sacha: Oh so boring!

Michelle: SECURITY, SECURITY!

*Coming soon… there will be a part 2 with both of them and 3 with Sacha… I just don’t have time to post now.

[ceilingfan5]

Prompts to sink your teeth into 27 and Taakitz please and thank you!

“Balls to the walls, can you believe it’s been ten years since graduation?” Taako is laying upside down on Kravitz’s couch, kicking his feet in the air aimlessly. 

“Not on my balls or my walls,” Kravitz decides, snorting. He pulls the laundry out of the dryer and dumps it in a basket, frowning as static zaps him.  “It’s truly wild to think about. I don’t think I’m going to go to the reunion, if they even invite me, you know? Like, I think I was weird enough in high school that I don’t even get recruitment attempts for MLMs-”

“You just haven’t met the right one yet,” Taako chastises. “Maybe Pampered Chef is for you.”

“I think I’m more of a Tupperware bitch.” 

“I’d love to keep you in a Tupperware. I’d poke holes in the top for you and everything.” Taako flips over and rights himself, woozy and red in the face. 

“What, like a grasshopper?”

“Nah, like a cool snake I found. But just a widdle one.” 

Kravitz is oddly touched. It really adds a layer onto the thing he and Taako are absolutely, one hundred percent talking around: ten years since graduation also marks ten years since they made a marriage pact and swore a blood oath behind the Denny’s. 

A decade is long enough, yeah?

Yeah, lots of people get married by the time they’re 28. It’s normal. We don’t want to be unnormal.

I think that ship has sailed, dude. 

Forget the ship. It doesn’t have to be real. It’s just…you know, motivation. 

A kick in the ass. Yeah. 

Something to keep us looking. Because- romance is hard!

You think it’ll get less hard?

No, I don’t think it will, Taako. I don’t think it will. 

Kravitz looks at Taako. It was stupid back then. It’d be stupider to bring it up now. He’s been head over heels for an embarrassingly long time. It was a joke, mostly. A stupid teenager thing. They’re almost thirty, for fuck’s sake. 

He brings the basket over to the couch and sits beside Taako. Their sides touch, and Taako is warm. 

They’re almost thirty, and Taako’s twin is getting married. And here they are, roommates, alone, together. Kravitz doesn’t know the last time he went on a date, but the last time Taako did was about four months ago. It’s not looking good on the ‘surely some other, perfecter guy will come around and Kravitz will be able to transfer some of the love beating under the floorboards to some regular, unsuspecting dude’ front. 

“It’s just wild,” Taako sighs, clearly on the same choo-choo. “I mean, I’m happy for her, like-”

“Like between her and Barry I’ve been ready to flush myself down the toilet for-”

“So long. SO long!” 

“Physically painful,” Kravitz agrees, not least because it made him incredibly aware of his own bullshit. “Like you said, so happy for them, and I mean, obviously w- I’ll show up to the wedding with bells on-”

“You bet your sweet ass we will. But like, you think my sad jester ass is getting any jingling action?” Taako gives him a sorrowful puppy dog face, like a pathetic court fool left in a cardboard box in the rain, and Kravitz laughs so hard he worries he’s going to pass out. He imagines those jingle bells a’janglin’. But he’d better not. 

He’d really better not. 

“It’s not that I don’t…It’s- It’s not like I want to make either of them feel bad...” Kravitz starts.  

“Definitely not.” 

“But I almost want to- cause a bit of a scene?” He looks at Taako. Taako perks up, tugging down his imaginary jester hat for Serious Mode. 

“I love causing scenes,” Taako says affectionately. “You know this.”

“I know this, and I agree with you,” Kravitz replies, grinning. Warm laundry forgotten. Socks, stay unpaired. Fuck your romantic life right up the same alley as his own. “What are you thinking? I’m hearing gears turning.” 

“Industry music doot-dooting,” Taako says with a nod. “Listen.”

“Listening. You know I’m listening.” 

“It- I mean, just for fun, right, nobody gets hurt, it’s fine, everything is fine? It’s for funsies.” 

“For funsies,” Kravitz echoes. 

“It would be soooo funny if we got engaged right before Lup’s wedding.” 

“Yeah?” Kravitz hears the ocean in his ears. Maybe he got a seashell stuck in there. You know how he is, always getting seashells in places. 

“Yeah! Yeah. Just as a fun prank, and for no other reason. There’s no way this could backfire.”

“Uhuh,” Kravitz says. “It- It would be easy, even. People say we act like a couple all the time. Haha.” Hopefully Taako doesn’t notice that Kravitz said ha-ha instead of laughing. It’s probably fine. Totally regular, even. He’s? Normal. 

“Absolutely.” There’s a manic look in Taako’s eyes, and Kravitz could lose himself in them like a stupid little boat in the Bermuda Triangle. Geometry never was his strong suit, and this current is pulling him under. How many times in his life has he gotten involved with something stupid because of Taako? Not to mention all of the stupid ideas Taako’s encouraged him to follow through on. 

God, is that why he minored in trombone? 

He’s so fucked. There’s no way this is ending well. There’s no way they walk out of this unscathed. 

“It would be funny,” he admits. 

“So funny.” Taako nods enthusiastically, like this is the greatest idea he’s ever had in his life. Fuck all those other bargain bin ideas, this is their ticket to the limelight. Fake dating. 

Fake engagement, even.  

Kravitz’s hand grips the upholstery of the couch, not even a full inch away from Taako’s hand. 

“Why not?”

[heartfullofleeches]

Hey Devil,

I turned 27 today and wanted to thank you for for all that you do here. It’s literally the only thing that brings a smile to my soul throughout the day…if I may be so selfish, could I request (whenever you can) a comfort piece with any of the cafe or museum folks? I’m just so tired of this life and would love some solace

(Happy birthday, Anon! Hope the waters clear for you and that this little piece is to your liking. Went with cafe because we haven't seen them in a minute)

"They should try mine first!"

"Eat shit, pussy! Boss is trying mine first!"

"I-I don't mind if you try mine last, master, but please enjoy it!"

Your birthday. One of the most awaited days at the cafe, but also one of it's most hectic. You sit at a booth surrounded by your regulars, the entire lot rented for your special day. The sneaky cat who paid for the venture planned the celebration around you and him, but a certain cow still had her keys and crashed the party during the decoration stage.

Every direction holds a new cake for you to sample. To start off, a high in, four tier cake sits at your immediate disclosure. Each layer was a different flavor and it was wrapped in the fluffiest frosting decorated with sugar pearls and lace pattering. Next was a quaint little dome with white frosting and a pink belly, topped with rabbit ear. Following that was a sheet cake with a grass pattern, bordered by a yellow wall and a little candle in the shape of a barn. To round out the display was a ghastly number that hardly resembled a cake at all; its walls collapsing outward on itself and burnt to a crisp. Frosting included. An air bubble in its center pops as someone points a manicured claw at it.

"If Y/n eats that thing, we'll be spending the rest of the day in the fucking hospital." Saber hisses, teeth bared as his fur frizzles from the stimulation.

His hyena rival rolls his eyes to the back of his skull. "Quit your bitching. I might have left in it a little too long, but I'm sure it's not that horrible."

"Ehehe... If we are claiming firsts, may I request they open my gift first." The leech-maid suggests "I've done my research and positive they'll enjoy it."

"Unfortunately for you, Doc. I believe I am the one who holds that title." Comes the crow from one corner, addressing the shiny pendant hanging from your neck.

"Here you go, sugarcube. Eat up." Whispers Belle; the cow woman having already cut you a huge slice from her cake while the others fought. You've tasted her desserts before, but this one seems sweeter and lighter than usual, and is your favorite of what you'd had in the pass. She wipes the crumbs from the corner of your lips and pockets the napkin.

"Alright, enough." Barks Bear, clearing his throat of the snarl within as he addresses everyone in the room. "We've been over this. We wish them a happy birthday, we give out the present, we play nice for a little while longer, then we each get ten minutes alone. Got it?"

Agreement comes in the form of a grumble or word of confirmation from around the room.

The wolf glances at the sheep by his side. "Wanna start off?"

"Um- Sure! Ha-"

"Wait just a moment.... There." Viney hands place a floral crowd on top your head, buds sprouting and binding the piece to your head by locking with each other through strands of your hair. "Perfection. Now we may begin."

One... Two.. Three.

Out of tune and a few off-key, your loyal and lovestruck pets sing you happy birthday. Through their discordant song, one thing rains clear. The love each individual bares for you and their willingness to make sure your happiness always last. It was the very reason they all were here now without going at each others throats'. The bickering may return another day, but at the end of it all their hearts were yours alone.

[hellaverse-events]

HellaVerse Week

Please join us in celebrating the HellaVerse by creating and recommending Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss fanworks (fanfiction and fanart)!

From October 27th - November 2nd, 2024, we'll be reblogging posts with fanworks related to the following prompts:

Day 1/October 27: Pride | Humility | Sinners | "I'm the only one that matters"

Day 2/October 28: Wrath | Chastity | Overworked | "I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!"

Day 3/October 29: Gluttony | Patience | Cotton Candy | "How my dirty bitches tonight?"

Day 4/October 30:  Greed | Charity | Fundraiser | "I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING!"

Day 5/October 31: Lust | Diligence | Distortion | "Lust shouldn't be about force. It's an ART!"

Day 6/November 1: Envy | Temperance | Deep Dive | "YOU dated a pop star?!"

Day 7/November 2: Sloth | Kindness | Medicate | "You lack discipline, control, and worst? YOU'RE SLOPPY."

Alternative Prompts: Layers of the Rainbow | Overlords | Deal Breaker | Execution Day | Pets

All kinds of fanworks are welcome — digital art, traditional art, 100 word drabbles, ficlets, longer fics, poems, embroidery, cosplay, music, gif sets, vids, etc. If you don't vibe with any of the prompt options for a given day, please feel free to use an alternate prompt.

We are hoping to inspire new fanworks, but this is also a great opportunity to recommend existing fics and fanart that the prompts remind you of. It is critical that you credit the artist/writer, and we'll share some guidelines for how to do so.

We will have banners you can use for your posts, graphics for recommending fics and other fanwork, and participation/completionist badges.

So that we can find your posts and reblog them during Hellaverse Week, please tag Tumblr posts with: #hellaverse week 2024, #day [x] or #alt prompt, #prompt name, #hellaverse. Additional tags for fanwork type are also welcome (#hellaverse fanfic, #hellaverse cosplay, #hellaverse fanart, etc.). Please also be sure to tag for content triggers (#suicide, #suicidal ideation, #self harm, etc.).

Check out the FAQ for more details and feel free to send asks if you have any questions.

[baelpenrose]

Nihilus Rex 27: Mind Games

Nils and Lash have some nice, healthy communication. Also, more jokes about mind games and preparation to deal with their enemy, rival and possible ally. As a behind the scenes note, yes, Ottendorf, Altendorf, and Altdorf are all real variants of the same type of cipher, and me and @canyouhearthelight arguing about which one was most in character to use was actually part of the gag that just went into this chapter. Sometimes it's fun writing hopelessly OP characters where we just get to nod obliquely at all the shit our nerdy asses have picked up over the years.

You better be careful what you do

I wouldn't wanna be in your shoes

If they ever found you out

You better be careful what you say

It never really added up anyway

I got friends in this town

Miranda Lambert, “White Liar” 

Nils

Class was boring - I mean, it would have been interesting, especially the political debate that came inherent in the macroeconomic discussion of regulation - but frankly with everything else going on and the plans Lash and I were hatching it felt almost beneath notice. Like a waste of time before we got to the real action.

Our weeb friend was a smarmy son of a bitch, I had to give him that, and trying to trace him took work -  one of the other reasons that I was just as happy to use the challenge and draw him to us. If it worked, it let us keep flying under the radar and gave us a layer of plausible deniability, and if worst came to worst it handed us a convenient option for another patsy if he proved less than tractable.  Lash and I would have to be careful in our eventual conversation with him in how we phrased everything to make sure statements could be read to assume that he was pissed that we were taking credit for his ideas to set it up properly, but it could be done with good planning. Recruit if we could, cash out the option to get the Feds off our backs if we couldn’t - because we were going to need to deal with the fibbie at some point either way.

I shared the thought with Lash to get her thoughts, and see if we could begin establishing how we wanted to lay in that contingency. “Hey, so it occurs to me, if we can’t recruit this guy, we may want to have some kind of setup to feed him to the feds when we encounter him, let them think we were just doing some dumb, edgy marketing for our totally-legal activism and the actual ‘economic terrorist’ got pissed at us for trying to take the credit. If we can’t get him on our side, better not to have him in the way, right?” 

She looked thoughtful for a moment - or more accurately, like she was plotting - before asking slowly, “How likely would we be to frame him for some of the shit we’ve done? Even just stuff we did before we met?”

“I’d have to look at his profile a little more closely, but bear in mind that the hack itself doesn’t really match the profile of either of our usual patterns, and nothing we did before that rises to the level where the federal government cares enough to pay attention.” 

“I took money from Microsoft and donated it to charity,” she pointed out. “Repeatedly.  That would definitely land on the news, at least.”

“Right,” I said, taking a breath, trying to steady myself, “and let’s not get into my thefts from social media and various databombings on their harvested userdata, BUT that followed a very different profile than the bank job, which is what we knew drew their attention - they’re looking for the people who’d run the bank job, not people who are little more than thieving horseflies buzzing around the heads of corporate titans and taking a few drops here and there that said corporations never notice enough to report.” It was an unpleasant truth - we’d stolen probably tens of thousands between us, but not all at once, and in increments that the corporations we’d robbed could lose to rounding error. 

“Hey, you said you wanted him fed to the Fed, not to go down for the loans,” she shrugged. “Wire fraud across state lines is still FBI-worthy.  Not to mention that many counts.” Lash started silently ticking off on her fingers before staring at them and nodding. “Yeah, plenty of counts, for sure.”

“Fair. I’m worried they’re looking for the bank robbers and we have someone we can give them as a patsy. So when we meet with him, let’s feel him out and make sure any statements we have are set up so they can be misread as him trying to find out if we’re stealing credit for his work, yeah?” 

“Can do.” She snapped off a sarcastic salute before grabbing my elbow and semi-forcing me to slow down. “Either way, our ‘viral marketing campaign’ is ready to go as soon as you set up the location for the final clue.  So, make sure your sandbox is as secure as possible so we don’t get any bugs in there.”

I nodded. “Yeah. I’ll have it ready in an hour. Want me to order some pizza while I do it?”  I had an extra tab open while I was getting the proxy networks set up and sketching out the ciphers for the clues.

“One meat lovers, one spinach and bacon, coming up,” she agreed, pulling out her phone. “Don’t forget to write down the address for me once it’s ready so I can translate it a couple times and hide it in the last clue.”

“Yeah, babe, I know, we’ve been picking at this for a minute.” I said, softly smiling. I wondered if she knew she talked to me the way her mom talked to her dad. I had almost finished the third cipher we were going to be doing it with. “Think three will be enough, or should we do four? At five it feels obnoxious, but if he wasn’t too paranoid to be hooked with fewer than three, he’d be a piece, not a player.” 

“Forty five minutes until food,” Lash announced before looking up. “I’m going to translate it at least twice - once to hex and once to… I dunno, a sound frequency maybe? So four should be fine on your end for the ciphers.”

“You got it. Altdorf code it is.” 

“Altendorf,” she corrected, scrunching her face at what she thought was a deliberate mistake on my part.

“Nope. Altdorf. Right wing computer nut, probably also a gamer. Altdorf code is a memetic variant on the classic Altendorf book cipher, named for a thing in a game franchise popular with that crowd.” I replied, smirking. Dating a girl who knew as much cryptography as I did was a blast, but it was occasionally fun to flex on each other. Loved it when she caught me out, as she often did, but it was sometimes fun to catch her off too. 

“Freaking nerd,” she half-mumbled, knowing good and well I would hear her. ��But if it works, it works.  Provided he figures out all the clues I’m laying out.”

“And then we put all this effort into this to show off for each other for nothing…” I muttered, watching her work over what she did as I finished up selecting a handful of games, books, and comics to cipher off of, with arc numbers for each and internally contained clues within the cipher to hint at what the target should be using for the Altdorf code. Nonsensical to anyone who didn’t understand it, but comprehensible to anyone who did - if you understood the rest of the cyphers it was under, of course. 

“Ew, eyewatering,” she grunted before adjusting something. It must have worked, because she was able to actually look at the screen when she was done. “And now for the clouds…”

“Those clouds look awful.” I said, idly thinking out loud. “Really bloated, data-wise.” 

“That would be because they are compressed audio tracks,” she confirmed. “Which, when unzipped and played, give the hex code.  But yeah, they’re ugly, aren’t they?” The door buzzed and she looked at her phone. “Pizza’s here.”

“Ah.” I stood up and got the pizza, tipping the guy. After he left I turned back to Lash. “So, now we wait. Trap is baited and set with a challenge for a new ally or an enemy we can get rid of quickly. Speaking of the question as to what we do if he is a new ally: thoughts on how we get rid of the fed? She’s poking around the white supremacist scene, and stirring them up harder might lead to more of them poking around if she gets shot.” 

Lash rubbed her face before getting up to get plates. “My first instinct is to lay low and monitor.  Right now, there’s no actual evidence tying us to the situation, so monitoring would be the most conservative and safest call in the immediate future.  And it gives us time to plan something in the event we do need to intervene.”

I nodded as I poured drinks for both of us. “Yeah. Fair point. Give him about two days, then we’ll meet him together. Two options, either he thinks the whole made up names thing is actually bullshit, in which case he’ll want to meet both of the people he’s working with and we can establish a triumvirate, or he thinks it’s for real and is playing like he thinks it's dumb, then he’ll want to meet with the heads of both groups, which means we’ll need you there to rep one of them. What angles we play depends on what angle he hits us with.” I was still thinking about the way we could feel that out while also maintaining the option to sacrifice him and dispose of him to the feds if he wasn’t amicable to a team up, but honestly that was mostly just a matter of careful phrasing. 

“If it comes to that, as long as I am repping the Icono-whatsits, I’m good.”

“No, I thought we’d have the brown, anarchic immigrant’s daughter represent the carefully crafted illusion of the violently traditionalist ones who want to restore ‘traditional values’ because that would totally make the con hold up. Tell you what, when we take it global, and we have to do this in India, THEN we swap roles and you have to play a Hindutava nationalist and pretend to be a Disciple chick. For today, the heel role is mine.” 

She set her plate down with a loud clatter, glaring at me as she stood up. “And on that completely uncalled-for note, I think I need to head home for a few days.  Let me know if he gets in contact, and we’ll go from there.”

I sighed, realizing what I’d done wrong, then felt a surprising flash of irritation - at her, at myself, at the fact that every time we started getting closer I said something obnoxious and that we never just got a few weeks without some shit happening. “You know what? Yeah. I’m sorry. That was unnecessarily rude. If you want to go home, I get it, but please eat first, or at least take some pizza with you. I shouldn’t have been that much of an asshole - I’ve been jittery since the Fed showed up, and I shouldn’t be taking it out on you. Know you can’t pass yourself off as a white supremacist, I mostly wanted to joke around about the fact that as this goes global, we may have to practice swapping roles for other countries. That’s all.” 

Lash took a deep breath and picked up one of the pizza boxes. “I know it will eventually be necessary for me to be the bad guy, but seriously. What part of this,” she waved a hand over herself, stopping to gesture emphatically at her face, “in any way says I won’t just blow our entire ass cover if I try to be a white supremacist? It’s not like I’m shirking work or something.”  The free hand shoved her hair back and she exhaled. “I think we just need a couple days to get actual sleep and calm down.”

“You aren’t shirking work, I know.” I said, trying to take a breath. “I’ve just been…I’ve been constantly trying to figure out every possible angle we can take this from, because I want to keep us out of trouble and keep the feds away, keep this prick away from your family, keep everything under control. I said something sarcastic that I thought was funny because yeah, obviously this,” I gestured at her, “was not going to be playing the white supremacist, this,” I gestured at my own face, “was. And I wasn’t looking forward to it. And it isn’t your fault I’ve been obsessively plotting, I haven’t been telling you all of it, but it’s been all of the babbling about contingencies I’ve been doing since the fed arrived. Because I’ve been afraid. And I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.” True, but I did also want her to see my perspective of how much effort I was putting into this whole thing.  “And if you need me to give you a ride home tonight, I will, but seriously take a pizza. Because it’s too late for you to be walking home.” 

The pizza box in her hand dropped back to the table and she growled in frustration. “UGH! And all the shit with Uber and taxis lately…” She fell back into what had become her seat on the couch. “Fine. But I’m sleeping out here. In clothes, so don’t get any ideas, buster.”

“We didn’t have time to go mattress topper shopping, so you’ll probably sleep better, and I’m insisting on plenty of blankets. And you’re eating your share of pizza.” I shrugged. “And even my Catholic ass won’t feel guilty about you being too damn stubborn to take a ride I’m offering.” 

“No ride. I refuse to owe you,” she spat before biting viciously into a slice of pizza, shoving half of it into her mouth without a trace of grace.

“And thus, couch, blankets, and coping aplenty.” I said, sitting down. “You okay, Lash?”

“I am sleep deprived, stressed about the apartment being ready when my parents are discharged next week despite knowing that Mori has had it ready since the day after she got here, and I’m mad at you for being a jerk.”

“Mori took care of the apartment, you know it, you know you know it. You’re going to sleep better tonight, and I’m sorry for being a dick.” I said, coaxingly. “Things are going to be alright. Let’s eat, brush our teeth, then we can rack out, okay?” 

“Fine,” she muttered, demolishing another slice of pizza.

I wasn’t certain what it said about my life - or life, in general - that “relationship issues” were causing me slightly more confusion and headaches than “FBI investigation” and “rival terrorist” combined. It definitely said something, but I wasn’t entirely certain what. Maybe it was a me problem. Maybe if I wasn’t dating someone who would do terrorism with me I wouldn’t have this problem.

But then it wouldn’t be worth it. 

[mdcg-archive]

day 27: greenblings as floormasters! excluding sou bcs he's already a floormaster.

design notes under the cut!

i thought it would be fun to base their floormaster personas off of the ais in maple 2.0!! sad ai/maple herself was excluded.

kanna's design was based on flan/pudding, based on that one ytts event where that's what's under her bucket! the brown poncho thing is meant to be like the top brown bit of the flan. i imagine she'd be like the sneering ai!! she's very silly and likes to pull pranks, as seen in ytts, but she's also a total bitch to the participants and constantly looks down on them. she'd be one half of a duo with kugie, similar to ranger and safalin!

kugie's was based on chè ba màu, a vietnamese dessert bcs i hc her as vietnamese! the yellow and brown layers tie into kanna and shins outfits, but the green marks her as a greenbling!! the dress is meant to look like an ai dao, a traditional vietnamese dress. kugie would be the angry ai! she gets fed up easily with kanna's antics and often calls her creepy, like how she did in that one flashback.

shin was based on castella cake! it's a simple cake with four ingredients, and the color scheme is very similar to kanna's flan! the brown beanie/scarf and shoes/pants edging are the top and bottom layers of castella cake, and the yellow shirt and pants are the main part of the cake. shin would be the fearful ai! he acts skittish around the participants, but it's skittish like a traumatized wild animal, where if you make one wrong move they won't hesitate to attack you - and the participants pick up on this. so despite shin's fearful demeanor, he's still very intimidating!

i don't have names for them, though. if you have any ideas feel free to share!

[cheshire61]

WHAT. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT THE FUCK?! HUH?! WHAT THE FUCK?! HES ALIVE?! MY BOY IS ALIVE AGAIN?! WHAT THE HELL?!... wait. SON OF A BITCHING I FORGOT ITS APRIL FOOLS GOD DAMMIT. 😭

I'M A DUMBASS. BEFORE IT GETS YOU. DON'T GET YOUR HOPES UP 😭

(Spoilers for episode at the bottom of the image because i'M confused ASF)

Edit1: I'M BARELY 1:49 SECONDS IN WTF IS GOING ON 😂

Edit2(3:11) : WHAT IS GOING ON?! I'M SO CONFUSED. WHAT THE FUCK. THIS IS SO RANDOM I'M GONNA CRYYYY.

Edit3(3:40) : THEIR BREAKING THE FORTH WALL NOW?!

Edit4(4:09): what.

Edit5(4:18): WHAT. THE. FUCK. IS. HAPPENING.

Edit6(6:21): I'M GOING TO SOB. IDFK WHAT'S HAPPENING.

Edit7(8:27): WHY THE FUCK IS BLUE HERE NOW?!

Edit8(8:41): SOLAR?! WHAT THE FUCK?! I'M WITH EARTH ON THIS I'M SO CONFUSED.

Edit9(9:49): Earth is going to cry soon and so am I because I'm so confused.

Edit10(10:13): LUNAR MY BABY NOOOOOO.

Edit11: I GIVE UP ON COMMENTING. I'M GONNA GO CRY.

... I don't even know if I can trust this video when I'm not even done with the mess of a video I'm watching Right now... I'm gonna finish watching the other video and then I'm gonna react to the Sun and moon show video for the day.

Ik this is an April fools video already. I know it is.

Edit1(0:04): sun: did you clean this? Moon: did I clean what? Sun:*slaps security desk* This thing. This bad boy? Moon: Yes. Sun: You cleaned? Moon:there was a layer of grease on it- Sun: Like a dream come true. Moon: I'm not adhering to cleaning! I just don't do it AS OBSESSIVELY as you do! Sun:Well you don't clean at all! Moon:I clean up my area. Sun: *sun tripping over his own words noises*

Edit: HES APOLOGING?! what the hell?

Edit:... WHY ARE ALL THE ANTAGONISTS APPEARING AND APOLOGIZING WHAT THE HELL?!

Edit: how is he walking... HOW THE FUCK IS HE WALKING?!

Edit: ANAKSVAJDHAHDJAHDIARHRIAHDKA WHY ARE ALL OF THEM APOLOGIZING 😭

Edit:HUH?! PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS JUST MOON AND SUN HALLUCINATING IDFK WHAT'S HAPPENING.

Edit:KC?! HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU ALIVE?! YOU GOT YOUR FACE RIPPED INTO TWO. HE'S IN HIS OLD BODY AS WELL. I'M HAPPY TO SEE YOU BUT WHAT.

Edit: BAN BAN?! WHAT?! YOU WEREN'T AN ANTAGONIST.

Edit: AMANDA THE ADVENTURER?! YOU WEREN'T EVEN AN ANTAGONIST.

Edit: TURNS OUT THEY WERE DREAMING AND THANK. GOD.

[amnyatas]

2023 Tumblr Top 10

oh no my top post is bitching about people misinterpreting characters. oops.

1. 234 notes - Feb 20 2023

its funny how complex and multilayered some of the most hated gw2 characters are, and yet y'all can't see the first layer half...

2. 134 notes - Feb 5 2023

feed your commander toxin cured bacon a gallon of vanilla extract cold filtered wurm tincture sunken rations cat soup grawl...

3. 133 notes - May 29 2023

4. 125 notes - Mar 20 2023

i'm trying not to sound mean, but i'm not sure how to express my surprise that people genuinely. click all their attacks in gw2....

5. 125 notes - Jan 15 2023

6. 112 notes - Mar 3 2023

7. 95 notes - Feb 27 2023

you've heard of "in defense of tangled depths", get ready for "in defense of diessa plateau" this map has it...

8. 83 notes - Jan 13 2023

necro is literally "mom told me to make friends so i did". 8 little guys following you around. maybe more.

9. 81 notes - Nov 29 2023

10. 70 notes - Apr 1 2023

Created by TumblrTop10

[enevera]

5, 6, 8, for kehtje, 12, 18, 26 for brighter half, 11, 15, 19 for darker half, 9, 24, 27 for 3ivies and 1, 4, 7 for Tyr <33333 gimme ALL the deets

SJDHBFSJH CACTUS ILU <33333333

5. Is your character more of a family or friends person?

kehtje is a family person, mostly by default. i think she's had maybe one friend outside her niece in her entire life lmao. hazards of being raised to die pretending to be someone else lol

she would like to be a friend person though, if she ever had the chance

6. What, if anything, sticks out about their appearance?

uhh probably her weirdly layered bangs. like a hime cut but a bit more fucked up

8. What are some internal obstacles that your character has to overcome?

hm kehtje's character arc is largely based around whether or not she can bring herself to die as her niece or live as her real self. a part of that struggle is trying to decide what she's willing to risk and whether or not her decision is justifiable within her moral code

------

12. What are some of your character's pet peeves?

brighter half has a pet peeve about people who are indecisive and wishy-washy. she has no fondness for incompetency and hesitations that can jeopardize her plans. it's part of why she dislikes the masked priest (her direct superior) so much bc that bitch is soooo just like completely incoherent at times (on purpose) lolol

18. Who/what comforts your character?

brighter half gets most of her comfort from darker half or, when not eve darker half can rlly help or she's not available, brighter half likes staring at the ocean for hours at a time, especially at night

26. What are the top three most distinguishable personality traits of your character?

probably ambition, her calmness, and her ability to be ruthless when the situation calls for it

------

11. What events in their past helped shape and influence them into who they are today?

meeting brighter half definitely shaped darker half's life and personality a lot. brighter half gave her both a purpose and opened her up to the idea of having choices and opinions, something she didn't have before. the time an assassin almost got to brighter half also struck darker half very deeply, even though brighter half didn't die, it made darker half much more protective and vigilant

15. What habits does your character have?

darker half reflexively always walks to limit the sound of her footsteps and has to actively remember to walk normally sometimes. she also has a habit of walking very slowly passed the doors of occupied rooms bc the eavesdropping urge never rests lmao

19. Summarize your character's goals in one sentence.

protect brighter half from harm using any means necessary

-------

9. What emotion does your character feel most frequently?

annoyance. three ivies is so annoyed all the time girl is one step off from glaring and yelling at everyone around her and is holding her self control with a white knuckle grip abt it lmao

24. From childhood to their current age, how has your character changed?

she's become a lot more calculating and far far more bitter. she was already a rather sullen child and a realist at a young age but since making her choice to go for a position of power in the religious org, she's become fairly pessimistic. she carries far more frustration and anger in her which is largely aimed at herself and people who remind her of what she could've been.

27. How does your character view themselves? (Expectations, intelligence, confidence, self-belief, etc.)

three ivies believes herself objective and largely impartial and allows herself to be this way by recognizing her place a purely that of a pawn in a larger game. her family wants her to take a seat of power so that she can further their goals in the political sphere and take advantage of her influence. bc of this, she puts a lot of pressure on herself to be perfect and to adopt whatever mannerisms will get her closer to the goals set for her. any outburst, any mistake, is a failure and another black mark on a personal record she views as being miles long

-------

What motivates your character?

tyr is so so motivated by her favorite thing which is not dying lol. she is fully willing to sacrifice her morals for this, even if she would feel like rllyyyy bad abt it

4. Does your character care about their reputation and/or how others perceive them?

absolutely! tyr is constantly monitoring herself and her behavior in order to gain a level of goodwill and popularity with everyone around her, but not in a way that threatens any existing hierarchies. she doesnt need any more enemies than the ones she already has lmao

7. Is your character good with kids?

yep! lying to kids a large part of being good with them and tyr is very good at lying and happy to say whatever to avoid tears and tantrums. she should NOT be a parent ever tho girl does not deal well with confrontation and would fold like a wet paper towel in the face of any legit resistance from a child skfjdh

oc ask game!

[fuzzydreamin]

for the weirdly specific artist asks, 4, 5, 9, 27?

4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw

I said it before in an earlier ask: Pip-boys.

They're so neat, and I sort of still have fun doing them, but damn is it annoying how having one line a little off makes the whole thing wonky.

Both crying and sort of looking forward to doing them for the refs I'm working on.

5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself

About 1/4 to a 1/3 of it gets posted?

The stuff I don't post is just WIP's - a lot of them are barely started sketches that I just never got back to. Half-formed ideas.

9. What are your file name conventions

Usually something very straight forward, that just explains what the file is. Like "Figure What PDN".

PDN stands for Paint.net, the program I use and what the file saves as. It just lets me know at a glance that it's the original file with layers, and not a saved PNG version.

So, an example in my folders right now is "Al Body Sketch PDN".

I also keep them in folders within folders that are all fairly logically named too. Like, I have a 'Fallout' folder on my art drive, which has a 'Fallout Art' folder, which has a 'WIPs' folder, and then folders for specific WIPs with a name that roughly explains what those are. I can get pretty anal about my sorting.

27. Do you warm up before getting to the good stuff? If so, what is it you draw to warm up with

Uh... nope😅I consider the initial sketch phase a warm up anyway, since I do a looser sketch before resizing things and going over it again to neaten it all up. I'm just not nearly fast enough at sketching things out atm to do warm-ups. It's usually one pic and I'm done for the day - if I even get a single image done in that time. I usually don't.

I want to get faster, but right now I'm just going at the pace that I can.

[rotisseries]

13 and 27 GO!!

13. first thing you're doing in the purge?

oghhh god I don't know. realistically I'd be a scared little bitch for that. but what I'd want to do is a different question. probably some relatively harmless vandalism or destruction of property to be real. the impulse is always there

27. what's your favorite or go-to outfit?

oooh ok so technically my go-to is fairly ratty shorts and t-shirts cause I never leave the house so the fun answer is these gray pants I have with my purple fall out boy shirt and then layers of jewelry

[laulo821]

stealing this set of questions from @i-like-eyes cuz i love talking about myself

1. Art programs you have but don't use none. or well i have paint and paint.net that came preinstalled but nothing else

2. Is it easier to draw someone facing left or right (or forward even) either is simple i think. just depends on the angle

3. What ideas come from when you were little everything i do comes from when i was little i guess so i don't really get the question

4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw soa or lloyd (OCs) because of those goddamn tattoos

5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself i post 100% of my art it just depends on the platform

6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn't supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it) my friends' art styles

7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate classical music

8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in the furniture gang. my very first group of OCs. they're just a bunch of guys with not much story going on

9. What are your file name conventions name of the character(s) (left to right) or ship + music inspiring it or theme or word

10. Favorite piece of clothing to draw belts

11. Do you listen to anything while drawing? If so, what yea. whatever my random youtube playlist gives me

12. Easiest part of body to draw hands

13. A creator who you admire but whose work isn't your thing uhhhh i don't know. i don't admire people

14. Any favorite motifs religion. anguish. love

15. *Where* do you draw (don't drop your ip address this just means do you doodle at a park or smth) my home address is

16. Something you are good at but don't really have fun doing i don't know. i'm having fun the whole way through else why would i even draw

17. Do you eat/drink when drawing? if so, what no. or drink (water mainly) if i'm thirsty

18. An estimate of how much art supplies you've broken none

19. Favorite inanimate objects to draw (food, nature, etc.) crowns

20. Something everyone else finds hard to draw but you enjoy hands

21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways yes? i mean i like roccoco paintings. i guess it counts

22. What physical exercises do you do before drawing, if any none i'm built different. but i may do head stretches in the middle of drawing if i've been at it for a while

23. Do you use different layer modes yea

24. Do your references include stock images yea. i barely use any references though

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by i don't know you tell me

26. What's a piece that got a wildly different interpretation from what you intended i don't have people that interpret my pieces or tell me so, so not applicable, i guess

27. Do you warm up before getting to the good stuff? If so, what is it you draw to warm up with no warm up i'm built different

28. Any art events you have participated in the past (like zines) no i'm not socially apt enough for this

29. Media you love, but doesn't inspire you artistically sanrio (?) i don't know everything inspires me by osmosis

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated all of them

[cigarettesandinevitablebetrayal]

27 & 31 for the ask game!

27) What’s the worst gift they ever received? How did they respond? (For Remus)

So, at one point in his Sidestep days, Remus got a bit tipsier than he planned and bitched about how, if he could, he'd dress more revealing. Ricardo asked him why he doesn't and Remus fumbled some response about being broke and none of his current closet being slutty enough.

Cue that year's Rangers Christmas party and Ricardo had bought Remus a handful of designer outfits. The problem? Most of them were sheer or cut in such a way that would show off Remus' tattoos. He smiled through receiving them because they were a gift from Ricky (Anathema helped pick them out, but Ricardo swears that doesn't let him get to say the present was from him, too) and it was honestly sweet. He got home, tried them on, swore at the amount tattoo showing, tried to layer a few of them in more concealing ways, and gave up.

When Ricardo asked why he never wore them, Remus told him that he hadn't realized they'd make him so dysphoric. He kept them, though. Sometimes he'd put them on and wear them around the house for a little while before taking them off again. After all, what good is a skimpy outfit if you can't even show it off to anyone?

31) When do they feel the most guilt? How do they respond to it? (For Loren)

Loren feels the most guilty when xe is actively lying to those xe considers a friend, especially when xe feels like xe could be telling them the truth. One example being that xe feels, especially later in the relationship, that xe could trust Mortum to know xer identity. Even if xe's afraid xe will be rejected for who and what xe is.

For the most part, xe just ignores it. Buries it down and tries not to think about it to hard. Eventually, Loren does tell a few people a few truths. It ends up better with some than with others.

Find More Specific Character Questions Here

[youngbloodbuzz]

bestie what did you think of ✨the record✨

i had to listen to it a few more times to answer this cause I like. i did not know where to start.

as a whole it's like the perfect length at 40 minutes and so easy to listen to their harmonies are incredible and I love the way they all shared lead vocals on various songs.

so many tracks were instant obsessed i need to listen to them on repeat favourites like true blue, not strong enough, satanist, and anti-curse, and overall I Love the album it's a strong outing but I will admit there's like two tracks that will take a while to grow on me

the self titled EP was always gonna be super hard to live up to cause it was just so unexpectedly perfect and i'd say like 90% of the album lives up to the hype/expectations

some moments i Love from the album in order of songs

a gorgeous acapella opening track that brings ketchum, id full circle imo. the lofi elements and harmonies are beautiful

the build up in $20 and phoebe bringing back the screaming in the harmonized outro. the one song I knew would catch my bff's attention as a boygenius intro song cause they love punk rock. i LOVE the layering of vocals in the outro

"I'm 27 and I don't know who I am" oh worm??? the harmonies on that line too CHEF kiss. emily girl whoever you are I hope your socials are all on private for the foreseeable future lmao

"You say you're a winter bitch, but summer's in your blood/You can't help but become the sun" hello??? oh my god. the outro in this song too is just...oh my god it makes me feel some kinda way, I've keeled over in awe and disbelief like every time. "it feels good to be known so well" jesus christ

cool about it will take some time to grow on me I think but god those lyrics are so brutal

the guitar work is so fuckin good the music video is SO good I feel like going on a road trip with the windows down with this blasting, but then you listen to the lyrics and it's so brutal like who HASN'T felt strong enough. "always an angel, never a god" just fuck me up

a gorgeous outro. i think this one will take a few more listens to grow on me too but that outro "I used to think/If I just closed my eye/I'd disappear" ahaha ow

this is such a funny and cute story song about being so invested in a song while driving that lucy missed a turn and julien and pheobe were like yea that fucked but you should probably turn the car around dskghasdf. "And I am not an old man having an existential crisis/At a Buddhist monastery writing horny poetry/But I agree" unnecessarily SO funny omg

another perfect punk rock song, the guitar riff in the chorus, the screaming vocals in the background that reminds me of aphex twin's come to daddy, the false ending, the change of tempo from fast in your face pace to a dreamy atmospheric landscape chef kiss

this is such a beautiful and bittersweet song to write about your friends, it's so painfully honest and hopeful. "You could absolutely break my heart/That's how I know that we're in love" how could they do this to me. that bit about the hummingbirds too what a beautiful sentiment

this song is SO julien behaviour. it's both so scary and so powerful and honest just like everything else julien writes about her mental health experiences and the production is so good. "I'm swimmin' back" being belted so powerfully and feeling like a direct callback "I wanted to stay" from claws in your back struck me so hard. "See, you don't havе to make it bad/Just 'cause you know how" lol ow

the only song on the album to make me fucking Cry and it's because of the last verse being a direct mirror to the last verse in me & my dog. with me & my dog still feeling like the mourning of a relationship and acknowledging how unhealthy it was, this one finally feels like anger and acceptance and finally recognizing that happiness and relief will eventually come to you and oh my god laying over the sound of the crowds cheers from their performance of me & my dog at the brooklyn steel concert was incredible and perfect

so overall, a fantastic album with only a small handful of songs that will eventually grow on me, I can't fucking wait to see them in june I cannot believe I got tickets to see them what a dream come true