#2024 was a real struggle in so many ways but it was also a great year

[tsukacchako]

happy new year everyone!!! <33

[kaibutsushidousha]

Kodaka April Fools tweets 2024

Lying just because it's April Fools' is so dull. Honestly painful to watch. Lying in general doesn't do you any good. In my younger days, I told every lie I could, saying some genuinely insane stuff about being a supreme leader of evil and whatnot, and thanks to that, now that I'm in my thirties, I got famous for all the wrong reasons and can't find a stable job because people think I'm associated with the yakuza... Sigh, I wanna deck my cringe younger self's face. Quit lying for fun while you can.

My classmates aren't doing great either. Thinking you're hot shit during your school days always comes back to bite you... My advice to my past self: slow and steady effort is worth more than any talent. Also, the part of life you spent larping with that silly horse laugh is not going to be one you'll want to remember later. I wish I could make that clear to him. White lies aren't a thing. Talent is never enough. My class is proof of that. Wanna know what my classmates are like now that we're in our thirties?

Akamatsu became a piano teacher. Her player skills capped off in her teens, it seems. But she's not that good at teaching so she's considered kinda mid at her job. And now she's struggling with the father of a student incessantly hitting on her. Tough world to live in.

Toujou opened a housekeeping company but she was too strict with her employees so everyone quit. And now she's doing everything on her own. Sucks to be in your thirties without any successors or employees. She's a prime example of how being so much better than anyone else doesn't do you any good. Well, she's always working for celebrities, so she's doing well financially, but I heard about some major court fight about a missing item under suspicion of theft from one of her clients. That can't be nice.

Yumeno got to her thirties still saying magic is real, so she's past the point of no return. She agrees that's an unhinged way to live, but she's too old to suddenly change gimmicks. Work takes her all over the country, but her gimmick doesn't allow her to publicly drink, so she has to get plastered alone in her hotel room after shows. I wish she could fix her life with real magic.

Harukawa? ...Haven't heard that name in a long time. Now she was a living edgy fantasy. The past tense was because I hadn't heard of her in a long time. I don't know the details, but apparently, she went to some war zone outside of Japan because her first love didn't want to date her. Takes some real edgelord to react to a broken heart like that, but if she's still alive, I have no idea how her thirties are treating her. My personal guess is that she's a mother of many.

Chabashira opened her Aikido school but is having a hard time attracting students. So she had the idea of starting an anti-sexual-harassment campaign that could double as advertisement, but thanks to her cluelessness when it comes to romance, she got canceled for mistakenly tossing men in regular couples. She's still doing the "degenerate males" bit in her thirties. Girl really needs to get on with the times. Rumor goes that she still downs huge packs of tequila bottles with Yumeno every now and then. Really don't think there's any salvaging her reputation.

Shirogane is an office lady still continuing her cosplay hobby on the side. She could be doing well if she knew how to keep her mouth shut but frequently rambles about cosplay history and etiquette, so no one likes having her around. Stay emotionally dependent on a single hobby long enough and your passion starts to close you off to others. That's her problem.

Angie was the most successful in the class! She made big money both on the art and the religion fronts. However, there were some controversies about her devotees selling counterfeits of her paintings at exorbitant prices and one magazine made a huge news coverage of it, which resulted in her catching the police's attention. She's been recently untraceable, with the rumors saying that she'll never be back to Japan.

Oh, and Iruma... Up until some point, she had the best life of all of us. She made big money off of her inventions' patents. So far so good. Things only started going off-rails after she married an ex-stripper. The two started a YouTube channel together. And later, her husband ran in last year's elections and lost big time. They got an awful debt from his election campaign and she had to get into side jobs to pay it off. And her husband? Disappeared. No word from Iruma herself about what happened. Tough world to live in.

No further updates from Kodaka in the past 3 hours, so I assume he went to sleep and will come back to tweet about the 7 remaining boys in the morning.

[sillymommy6969]

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ 𝕰YES ON THEM PT. 2

Manon Bannerman x fem!reader

summary: eyekons gathered evidence of bannern/n from their socials (tweets, instagram posts, tt reposts, etc.)

warnings: fluff, fake everything, over analysis, kinda a blurb

prev. next.

���� BANNERN/N STRUGGLING TO KEEP SECRET; a thread

i. Y/N’s Instagram posts 2022 (dream academy)-2024

Liked by daniela_avanzini, meretmanon & 126,771 others

ynln nyc opening show was a dream come true <3

18th April, 2024

lararajj OMG MOMMY

meganskiendiel just one chance please?

user01 Megan ily but please get in line

user02 MEGAN YOU’RE SO REAL FOR THIS

y0on_cha3 Pretty Y/N :D

meretmanon you’re my dream come true ;)

user03 manon ain’t slick

user04 Yes support your girl ma’am

user05 Manon only opening this app to comment on

Y/N’s post is a mood

user06 @user05 girlie makes an exception

Liked by lararajj, y0on_cha3 & 11,662 others

ynln missing my tyla (iykyk), but thankful for the break

3rd December, 2022

lararajj Bring me some of your mom's cooking

emilykelavos phone me when you're back pretty

user01 omg predebut emy/n crumbs

user02 Hi Emily!!

sophia_laforteza omg send me that photo of everyone

meretmanon tyla misses you too baby

user03 THEIR PR TEAM SWEATING

user04 guys who's stalking in 2024 and just finding this

user05 I'm not fucking normal about this

user06 WHERE ARE MY BANNERN/N TRUTHERS

< NOW DELETED POST BELOW >

Liked by sophia_laforteza, meretmanon & 16,043 others

ynln grateful for this valentine's day @meretmanon

14th Janurary, 2023

meganskiendiel Didn't need this on my tl...

lararajj puked seeing this <3

ynln haters hate me cuz they aint me

lararajj if that helps you sleep at night

adelajergova At least ya'll kept it out the rooms!

user01 I just know they're sick of them

user02 ADELA YOURE OUR STRONGEST SOLDIER

meretmanon you’re my dream come true ;)

user03 You guys look great together!

user04 I always knew they were close on DA

user05 WHERE ARE THEIR MEDIA MANAGEMENT

user06 This was pre-debut so they didn’t have it yet

ii. Manon’s tiktok reposts

iii. The Katz/DA talking about Bannern/n in interviews

When Daniela and Megan were doing their section of a tiktok video for Billboard about how well they knew their members, they were asked “which of the girls’ pulls the hardest”.

“I feel like it’s a tie between Lara and Y/N realistically,” Daniela glanced over at Megan for support.

The Chinese-American hummed in agreement, “Yeah. Lara has this whole girl crush aesthetic goin’ for her and it’s definitely a big hit with a lot of fans. Y/N has a cleaner, old money vibe, so she pulls more with like people we used to meet. Like remember, back in dream academy?”

Daniela laughed, “Yeah, it was so hard tryna eat with her.”

“People would just come and ask her for her number, but she was tak—!” Megan slapped a hand over her mouth, earning a wide-eyed hiss from Daniela. The redhead laughed nervously, shaking her head to dismiss what she almost said. “She just wasn’t interested, so she’d turn down so many people.”

“So yeah, definitely Lara or Y/N pulls the hardest.”

In another interview of Sophia and Manon talking about how they balance their work and life, the Filipina shared ways she kicks back on days off to make sure she put self care first.

“Yeah, I love cooking for the girls, it relaxes me.”

Manon raised her mic, “I think we also just all go out together and hang out like normal friends, y’know. We go out to dinner, go to the movies and go shopping when we can.”

“Yeah, I remember when we first debuted, you and Y/N would go out together a lot.” Sophia mentioned without realizing.

Manon eyed the camera, nodding her head.

“Yeah, retail therapy solves everything,” Manon joked, “I do enjoy a good trip to the mall and like a long night out with all of us when we’re free. Super therapeutic.”

On Emily’s instagram live, questions about Manon and Y/N’s relationship during the survival show were asked.

“Wow, you guys are going straight to the point, huh?” she chuckled, “Y/N and I were pretty close on dream academy, but her and Manon were 100% closer. The management liked pairing them together a lot on the show cuz they looked really good together onstage, but they spent so much—and I mean, so much—time together off set.”

user01 is y/n currently dating anybody?

user02 when did you last talk to y/n?

“Y/N and I still talk a lot, but she’s really busy. She called me a couple days ago, but yeah, I really miss her.” Emily pouted, “I am not sure about her personal life, but that’s not a secret I’m in a position to share.”

The blonde’s face visibly irked, her expression changing when she spotted a comment about Y/N’s old instagram posts.

“I just know Y/N has a good thing going in her life right now. She really loves what she does and she loves all the support you guys show them.” Emily nodded, “And honestly, at the end of the day, the real fans will support Y/N through whatever.”

VIEW MORE OF THIS THREAD?

[la-muerta]

[ENG SUB + Translation] Hou Minghao's farewell message to Zhao Yuanzhou, 16 Nov 2024

"There's always a breeze or two in the mortal world that can send me on beautiful dreams for 18,000 miles."

This trip in the mortal world is a journey that I, Zhao Yuanzhou, had to make.

A one-word spell: Dream. Now, let me tell you a story...

In the Great Wilderness, everyone knows me, and everyone sees me as the Great Demon that has committed every evil deed, deserving of death. But I made the unexpected choice to enter the fray with sworn enemies, old friends, and new acquaintances, embarking on a new path investigating cases and hunting demons together. To voluntarily sign a contract that decided my death date... most people would think that is an ill-omened beginning. But to me it was a relief, to finally be free of the prison that was of my own making...

Fate bound our demon hunting team together, and as we solved cases together, we got to know each other's true hearts. Some amongst us conquered might with gentleness, some amongst us were full of righteousness, some soft-hearted despite our tough exterior, some are lively troublemakers, some holding on to a true heart. Such a motley crew coming together and the only thing they seemed to be able to agree on was: that I wasn't to be trusted. They know me as Zhao Yuanzhou, but they can't forget all the evil I did as a Great Demon. But it didn't matter since I didn't hold much hope for myself as well, so all these other emotions didn't mean anything to me.

If you asked why I came here, I would tell you it's because I am the Great Demon Zhu Yan, forced to bear the burden of being born as a "vessel". I lost control and made an unredeemable mistake, and only death can eliminate the pain in my heart. Living is torture; Death is the gift of relief. However, I also wanted to give myself a chance at redemption, a boat rowing against the current.

Along the way, the demon hunting team encountered many complicated cases, but we worked hand in hand to solve them and the blades that we had pointed towards each other were turned towards the outside. Sworn enemies became comrades in arms, and as we took one step closer to saving the world, we also uncovered wounds that had already scarred over. As we saw each other's past wounds more clearly, we saw the past laughter that was used to hide the pain. Those who had a responsibility to protect found themselves unable to, those bearing the burdens of upholding the family's honour were just trapped in a dream, and those should have grown up with no worries found their world turned upside down overnight...

If you have a nightmare, someone might comfort you by saying don't worry, everything that happens in a dream is inverted. But what if it's a beautiful dream? Everything I'd experienced felt so real to me. As I journeyed on, I began to get lost in the dream. I started to wonder, what was I going to do if I was the one who lost everyone else in the end? I have to confess, I began to feel reluctant to part with everyone...

The lonely boat travels across the bitter seas, but friendship caused waves to rise in a heart that had died. Along the way, we mended each other bit by bit. What I have experienced is too beautiful for the other "me" to ever understand. The wish to enjoy the passing seasons and happiness of an ordinary life held great hidden strength, so that even though I already knew the ending, I did not give up the struggle. Because of all of you, I was driven not just by my thoughts of despair, but by my desire to protect all of you.

Be it the Great Wilderness or the mortal realm, everything must return to its original path. If you grieve over the fact that Zhu Yan did not get a chance to choose, then I will tell you that it was only a dream. If you are looking forward to embarking on a new journey with Zhao Yuanzhou's companions, then you have to wake up to hear the rest of the story. By the way, don't forget what I said – in the future, when it rains, that means I've come to accompany you. Turn the boat around and think of it as a big dream. On the other shore, someone is searching for me. A one-word spell: Wake.

The days I spent with Zhu Yan/Zhao Yuanzhou, confining myself to my shell and experiencing a life seeking an inevitable end, but I also felt the redemption in the countdown. For an actor, this was a very special creative process. The director's help, encouragement, and trust played a huge role in letting me experience this unique and meaningful role of Zhao Yuanzhou. He gave me a lot of room to interpret the one and only Zhao Yuanzhou, and with this support, I was able to accompany Zhao Yuanzhou through this journey, and finally entrust him to you, the audience, with peace of mind.

Also unforgettable were our companions who were with us every step of the way, and the process of everyone coming together in the creative process is very enjoyable, very satisfying, very worthwhile, and I will remember those scenes vividly. I will miss the Great Wilderness, the Demon Hunting Bureau, and the Kunlun Mountains... places where we left our joys and sorrows. Thanks to Wen Xiao, Xiao Zhuo-daren, Pei Sijing, Xiao Jiu, Ying Lei – because of our little demon hunting squad, Zhao Yuanzhou left knowing he was loved. Thank you to my ride-or-die Li Lun, we didn't forget our oath to protect the Great Wilderness. Thank you to my dear friend Zhao Wan'er, and Grandpa Yingzhao, who gave Yuanzhou the rare warmth of familial affection! Last but not least, I would like to thank all the crew behind the scenes for their hard work over the past few months. I have woken up from the dream, but my heart will always remember.

Signed, Zhu Yan/Zhao Yuanzhou, with remorse but no regrets

[lurkingshan]

Shan's Favorite Dramas of 2024

The year is wrapping up and I have forced myself to narrow down to a list of 15 (I tried 10 but the choices were too hard!) of my favorite 2024 dramas across genres and countries of origin. This is not every drama I liked this year (that list would be incredibly long), but these are the ones that inspired the most brain rot and really stuck with me.

At 25:00 in Akasaka (Japan, Gaga)

The mood and tone of this drama was just perfect, and I loved the way it explored the blurred lines and confusion that can result when the real and fake aspects of a professional relationship get all mixed up. Hayama was a great character and I loved his arc, in particular.

Cherry Magic (Thailand, Viu)

I still can't believe how much I loved this adaptation. A fantastic example of taking a work from another culture and translating it to a new context while not only retaining the core narrative, but even enhancing it. This show gave us what the Japanese version didn't--the resolution to the physical intimacy arc at the core of the premise--and retained all the charm of the original while adding new humor. And delivered one of the best romances of the year while it was at it!

Don't Care for an Old Man's Underwear (Japan, fansub)

Oppan, my beloved. Easily the best family drama of the year, loaded with excellent messages while (mostly) avoiding feeling like an after-school special. Makoto's journey to update his thinking with Daichi's help, and the mutual friendship that developed between them, is one of my favorite relationships of the year. I loved every character's story; there is something for everyone to connect with in this show.

Fangs of Fortune (China, iQIYI)

This drama was just so much FUN. A gorgeous feast for the eyes, a wealth of fascinating characters and relationship dynamics, and a fast-moving plot that you don't need to try too hard to understand. It was a great binge and Li Lun was easily my favorite villain of the year.

Gyeongseong Creature (South Korea, Netflix)

A gorgeous period piece set during one of the darkest chapters of Korean history, this one took me by surprise (I am usually not a horror girlie). The writing for this show had surprising depth and I loved its themes around family and loyalty and survival under fascism.

Knock Knock Boys (Thailand, Gaga)

My boys! I loved this show about a group of four queer men living together in a shared house, getting into mischief and supporting each other through school and work and relationship struggles. The show is funny and breezy but also manages to tackle some serious issues with grace while delivering two strong romances and my favorite coming out narrative of the year.

Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo (South Korea, iQIYI)

Winner for best QL of the year, and a romance that will be sticking with me for a long time. Dohoe is one of the most honest and unflinching depictions of a an adult psyche shaped by childhood abuse that I have ever seen on my screen. It was healing to see him treated with such compassion and to see him and Juyoung find their way to a happy life together. An absolute must watch for all you angst with a happy ending fans.

Love for Love’s Sake (South Korea, iQIYI)

It's so hard to get a high concept premise like this right, but this drama did an amazing job with it. It's one of those shows where you can go back over everything that happened in retrospect and it all adds up, and I loved that the ending lent itself to so many different interpretations. One of the best watch experiences of the year.

Love in the Big City (South Korea, Viki)

Go Young, my beloved. This drama adaptation of the internationally successful novel exceeded my wildest expectations, and I am still a little stunned that we got the privilege of seeing it. It is, bar none, the most authentically queer show on this list, and a beautiful depiction of all the significant relationships in one young man's life. I will be rewatching it many times and keeping it close to my heart.

Love is Like a Poison (Japan, fansub)

A masterful blend of comedy, action, and romance, this drama about a lawyer with delusions of grandeur and the scam artist who decides to become his partner was a constant delight and gave us my favorite battle couple of the year.

Marahuyo Project (Philippines, YouTube)

I can't tell you the joy and relief I felt to get another high quality queer drama from the Philippines this year. And this one had such a great cast of characters, anchored by one of my favorite protagonists of the year in King. It's funny, it's romantic, it's touching, and as always for a JP Haboc production, it has an amazing soundtrack.

She Loves to Cook and She Loves to Eat (Japan, fansub)

My girls! I'm still amazed by how much this drama gave us in its second season by expanding the world of the show beyond our two main characters to include so many other women whose stories were just as fascinating. This is the season where Nomoto and Kasuga really came into themselves and started building the life they want to have together, and it was a real joy to watch.

Tender Light (China, YouKu)

The way this show had me in a chokehold while it was airing! Visually stunning, incredibly well-constructed, and featuring one of the best performances of the year from Zhang Xin Cheng, it's an exhilarating mystery and a very touching story of the unusual bond between a student and the older woman who fascinates and terrifies him.

The Midnight Romance in Hagwon (South Korea, Viki)

You know a drama is good when it has you deeply invested in a random topic you never thought you were interested in. In this case, that's the intense debate on pedagogical methods between the public schools and hagwons in Korea. Alongside delivering a great romance, this drama was passionate about teaching and it sucked me right in to the Korean literature lessons at the heart of the story.

Unknown (Taiwan)

No other drama inspired more brain rot in me this year than this story of a family rocked by changing feelings as the chosen siblings grow up. The loyalty and love and complex desire between Wei Qian and Wei Yuan is the heart of this story, and the drama did an incredible job of taking us along for the journey as things shifted and changed between them. I still think about them all the time.

Bonus: Favorite Classic Dramas Watched for the First Time in 2024

I am always catching up on an endless backlog of dramas alongside my live watches. Here are the best gems I finally watched this year.

Lost (South Korea, Viki)

I loved this deeply melancholy drama about two lost souls who connect unexpectedly. I finally pulled it up from my to be watched list because it shares director Hur Jin Ho with Love in the Big City (he did part 2 with Go Young's mom) and it sure feels like it! The characters are deep and complicated, the relationships are complex and carefully built, and it is hands down the best encapsulation of a failed marriage between two good people who truly loved each other that I have ever seen. It's heavy and not for everyone--mining the depths of human despair is kind of its thing--but if you like this sort of story it's world class.

Mouse (South Korea, Viki)

I was recently in the market for a good mystery thriller, so I finally watched this apparently very divisive 2021 drama--and if there's a divide I am firmly on the HELL YEAH side of the line. This drama had an interesting concept (that I will not describe bc holy shit spoilers, you should go in knowing nothing) that it unwound with remarkable patience and precision over 20 episodes. Its themes were strong and consistent, the lead characters were super compelling, the plotting and pacing and editing were unbelievably tight, the performances were incredible, and it made a lot of provocative points and ended well, feeling coherent and complete. It sustained my full interest and attention without any stumbles for ~25 incredible hours.

Mr. Sunshine (South Korea, Netflix)

Another one that's been on my watch list forever and finally got its moment when I was in the mood for a historical where ladies got to wield weapons alongside the men. And unsurprisingly, I loved it. Writer Kim Eun Sook is known for her big, glossy, epic dramas, and her style made a good pairing with a story about a rebel faction during the Japanese occupation of Korea. I really loved all the main characters in this show, and was moved by the complicated exploration of their loyalty (or lack thereof) to their homeland. This drama also has a very strong class analysis baked into its themes, which I very much appreciated. It was a traumatic watch, but in a way that felt right given the setting and the choices characters made.

The Miracle of Teddy Bear (Thailand, YouTube)

I watched this one on a mission and it was worth every moment. Nut is one of my favorite protagonists in any queer drama, and I thought the show made great use of its fantasy concept to explore some very real human experiences with depth and compassion. This show feels like an especially important counterpoint to the Thal BL bubble, and I recommend it highly for anyone who enjoys those dramas.

When I Fly Towards You (China, Netflix)

And we end on a light and sweet note, with my favorite coming of age romance that I watched all year. This drama was just lovely, and it will be a go-to rewatch for me for years to come. There’s something so comforting about a story where you start with the happy ending before jumping to the beginning, and just get to sit back and see how they get there. I loved all the characters in this and marveled at how it was never boring despite being decidedly low angst.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - I hand out a couple of high scores & have qualms about pairs

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top. I didn't get many screen shots this week, so welcome to a WALL OF TEXT. Duh duh duh dum.

July 2024 Week 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

We Are Cute (Weds iQIYI) ep 16 fin - TanFang are ridiculous but I have grown to truly love them. ChainPun at the end made me hoot with laughter everyone was a meme of FINALLY. In fact, I loved all the pairs, this was a great ensemble piece.

I was left mildly wondering if Arm will ever lead a BL. 

All in all? 

I really enjoyed this show. It was slow to find its stride (I didn’t get into it until ep 7) but I’m very glad I gave it a chance. It’s a soft ensemble piece with multiple couples and very little plot, but I didn’t care because it’s not trying to be anything more substantial. Essentially this was a series of vignettes covering one year of uni for a queer friendship group finding love, new friends, and laughter. It’s not being harsh with us or it’s characters the way some offerings of this ilk have been (side eyes Friend Zone and Only Friends) nor did it tumble into Gen Y chaos. In fact, this reminded me more than anything of a refined and elevated Love Sick - just with older characters and occurring within a genre that has matured too. It has that close queer friendship group meets earnest gentleness that made me adore Love Sick so much. In other words, this was Thai BL at its finest, finding it roots again 10 years on, but also stretching upwards and showing us what it could do with that original seed. So? I loved it. Did it blow my mind? No. But it left me smiling and made me belly laugh quite a bit. 9/10

Technically it should probably get an 8/10 - too much singing, but I’m bubbling over with nostalgia rn.

Wandee Goodday (Sat YT) ep 12 fin - I struggled to watch that fight. But that’s because it was so well done for a BL. Lots of speeches this ep. (I said too cheesy right before Dee did.)

I like Drake & Title as a new ship. Hope it sails. Also some decent ace rep. 

On a totally different note: Good use of frosting. But… you know I’m gonna say it… NO SINGING. 

Final thoughts:

What a FUN show. A charming quintessentially modern Thai BL about a doctor and a boxer who start as a one night stand and then fall in love. Great rep for everything from Muay Thai, to safe sex, to FUN sex, to ace, to bisexuality, to smiley kisses, to the first legal gay wedding in a Thai BL. It’s a delight and I enjoyed (almost) every single moment of it. 

An easy 9/10. 

I do hope we get more GreatInn.

The Rebound (Weds Gaga) eps 7-8 of 12 - So Ryu’s ma is evil? And Frank is giving me serious second lead syndrome. Also he’s been working out a lot. I noticed my dude, thank you. I don't think we've ever gotten this kind of focus on a side dish before. The show is in dangerous territory, since he's so good he's taking attention away from the leads. Also, I think Zen is completely aware of what is going on with this love triangle, he just doesn’t want to put up with their nonsense. I even like the cute side crumbs. 

On a complete aside: why are crime lords in BL always in bathtubs? Asking for… the other genres. Wouldn’t it be hilarious if The Godfather entirely took place in bathtubs? A Real Man has a large… tub. 

And we end with mass murder? WOW! Chaotically played my dearest pulp! 

Century of Love (Weds Gaga) eps 3-4 of 10 - These boys are playing complicated roles with lots of layers to them. Daou is doing a great job. We can see the old man inside this kid. Offroad... I’m not convinced, he’s chewing the scenery a bit. I actually think he has the more layered and complicated part to play. So I'm giving him a chance to subtly show that cheerful façade fracturing with delicacy. But I worry we may be back in JamFilm territory where one partner can’t quite keep up with the other's skillz.

All of this is to say, this is still a better acted piece than I was expecting. (Although the surrounding cast and special effects are doing our leads no particular favors.)

It’s hugely enjoyable but uneven (with those occasional injections of slapstick humor) I’m not entirely sure the production knows what it wants to be. I wish it had the courage of its convictions to lean into the “I feel you linger in the air” aesthetic. Now that I know Thailand can go there, I’m a bit annoyed when a show like this, which should, doesn’t. Which is not to say I’m not enjoying it. I am. A lot. Just that I should probably lower my expectations. Daou, however, is so damn good, he keeps getting my hopes up.

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans (Fri iQIYI) ep 3 of 8 - Oh no we have a lonely poor little rich boy. Catnip character for @heretherebedork. Meanwhile, I’m liking the layers of the main romance, with everybody having hidden agendas and such. Nice tension. Of course I love the eroticism around smells. One of my favorite tropes. But I’m not sure I buy the relationship chemistry between the leads when this much lying is going on. 

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 7 of 12 - I am growing to love Fourth's version of this character. He’s so frantic and confused, but in a completely different way from the JBL. It’s a bit more whiny and a bit less cartoonish. But it resonates with me more. He's less of a meme tho. The photo moment! I literally squealed, "Gah!!! They are so cute!"

Linguistic moment. Did you hear in the cupcake section that Half went to rao/ter? Very sweet. (The boys use rao/nai.)

Also, yay for the twist on the school counselor character! Best thing ever. I would like the entire story of Nop & Sin GMMTV, please and thank you. Also… NO SINGING. 

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 6 of 12 - I’m continuing to enjoy this a lot. It’s a fun cast. A touch twee for me, and I’m really hoping they amp up something other than the romance soon, but I don't mind ending my week with these two.

The Trainee (Sun YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - I'm enjoying this show so much, just not as a BL (yet). It’s honest to the internship experience of overwhelm (such as I recall, it's been A WHILE). I’m not sure how much BL I’m getting from it thus far. I mean our leads shared a long glance or two but that’s about it. It’s very slow burn. But I don’t mind that since I’m liking the surrounding stuff. Can't stand the girlfriend intern character tho. I hope she get redeemed.  Or killed.

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 6 of 10 - Halfway through I had already finished my drink out of sheer boredom.  Trash watch here.

Knock Knock Boys (Thurs Gaga) ep 9 of 12 - Frankly I’m finding this relatively dull right now. Lovely kisses tho. Best and Seng are great together, consummate BL pros, not a pair I had on my bingo card. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 5 of 10 - I like how much we can see K’s intense liking and emotional need for this loud broken kid. And how easy it is for him to admit to that truth. Because what he’s going through is so much worse than admitting to having feelings. The acting is fantastic. Sometimes I forget how great Japan can be. And then they decide to remind me. Oh, it’s SO GOOD. 

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - Another one I’m finding boring. Just japan’s version. The vintage yaoi “old dude creep trope” I see. It’s been a while. 

It's airing but...

Meet You at the Blossom - it's your funeral (or, more likely, one of the main characters'). You can argue but... statistics. You know my feelings on this matter. MY BLOG, remember?

GIF by mypotatokun

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer released to Korean theaters 5/25. HoTae & DongHee, side couple from Unintentional Love Story are back! Same actors, same character names. I love them. Devastated this hasn't had international distribution. I demand you tell me the moment you find it!

The Last Time (Thai Fri YT) - Got bumped to Aug 2. Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

July Releases Still To Come

7/24 I Saw You in My Dream (Thai Weds Gaga) - Dee Hup is behind this one so I have high hopes. Younger boy chronically teased his whole life by the older boy next door suddenly starts having horrific prophetic dreams about his bully and must save him.

7/26 4 Minutes (Thai Netflix or iQIYI?) - Great, a rich boy studying business at uni, suddenly gains the supernatural power to see four minutes into the future.

7/29 Battle of the Writers (Thai ????) - trailer here, TutorYim return, and while I adore them, I really hope this is better than Middleman's Love. Won't be hard. However: the premise? Ugh. Something something authors fighting - save me. Why don't writers understand that nothing is more boring than writers?

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

No time this week, I'm having computer issues.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in it's infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

There's these tricks, remember.

[cantareincminor]

Fandom Wrapped (Reader Edition) 2024!

Thanks to the wonderful @kattyelf for creating this template! Links and detailed reviews under the cut.

Disclaimer: I probably read hundreds of SxF fics in the past year, and it was not easy to choose which ones to put in the list above (or below)! This fandom is full of wonderful, friendly creators and I am so glad to be part of it. I also had to narrow it down to only the ones I read and reread in 2024, not 2022 or 2023. Finally...I also happened to read many good fics only once. Sometimes a fic is just too painful or sad to reread, especially if it's not finished.

Favorite fic and author: After peace by @unhappy-sometimes!

I could gush about unso for a whole post and not be done, but I will try to contain myself. Her fic After peace originated from an AU comic she drew where Twilight was forced to retire early due a major injury, and drifted aimlessly until WISE asked him to take care of an orphan they had rescued from Project Apple. There are several things that amazed me about this fic and cemented it in first place for 2024:

The premise. It was original and so full of potential.

How personal Twilight's journey felt to me. I didn't have a life-threatening injury, but I did put my career on hiatus in the past year and have often struggled with questions of -- what am I worth when I'm not "doing" anything? I was so used to going 150% in the rat race and coming out on top at great personal cost to health and family; even if all that was bad, how else can I get that sense of accomplishment? How can I stop wanting that sense of accomplishment?

Her style, which is both vivid AND concise. The fic was around 22K words if I remember correctly, with a well-constructed plot, character arcs, plenty of emotional beats, and a satisfying resolution. I often wonder if my writing is too verbose and when I see something like After peace, it challenges me to do better.

THIS WAS UNSO'S FIRST FIC EVER. THE HELL. It's like a freshman album that gets put up for a Grammy.

Fic(s) I reread (plus runners-up):

That Time Yor Seriously Thought About Leaving by peonydee: This is a WIP with one more chapter before completion, I believe. Peonydee's style is unique in how it's hard-hitting and disarming at the same time. Yor and Twilight find themselves in impossible situations, their relationship tested to the limit (and one of them in a close brush with death), yet there's still an undercurrent of wry humor, almost fatalistic due to the fact both of them have been steeped in death and dirty work for decades, yet still hopeful and reaching for each other. I also cackle every time she makes Twilight go off on a mansplaining tangent without ever using the term outright. A masterpiece of show not tell.

Is It Really All Right? by zyzy1083: This one is tender. A jealous!Loid fic with a fascinating portrayal of Loid from Yor's perspective. The imagery of a dark sea choking down any true thought or emotion from breaking for air will stay with me for a long time. There's also the fact she basically made up lyrics for an indie song as part of the plot and I had to ask whether it was a real song. Finally, there's the fact she was bold enough to portray Loid as less than a perfect, kind, smiley husband toward Yor, but in a believable way. He snaps at Yor at times. He loses his patience. It feels like a real relationship, in the awkward tension when one partner wants to talk and the other absolutely does not want to talk. I admire that courage and wish more authors would take that risk (calling myself out I guess!).

Green-eyed Monster by bigbruja: another jealous!Loid fic that's lighthearted and fun. This is a comfort reread. I enjoy seeing Loid recognize the threat of a supposed "old friend" of Yor's, questioning his own feelings and how far he needs to go to fend this guy off. The guy is a Garden assassin, unbeknownst to him. I also love Yor's own inner struggle of just wanting everyone to get along, but showing steel when she needs to.

dalliance by rosetintednerdglasses: this is a WIP, but it is HILARIOUS and I hope everyone will go encourage this author to pick this fic back up when they have a chance. TLDR, Twilight (in disguise) is sent on a joint mission with Thorn Princess and flips out internally when he sees it's Yor. Handler then orders him to ensure Thorn Princess continues to cooperate. So as Twilight, he has to sort-of honey trap Thorn Princess, while as Loid he has to keep Yor happy. Poor Yor believes she's torn between two different men and close to cheating on Loid! Situational hilarity all over the place, and fun world-building, like this other WISE agent randomly named "Steel Bunny" (LOL).

Not According to Plan by @kyrathel: love you girl! This is a gift fic for me, but that's not the reason I reread it (even though it's a WIP as well!). It's SO FUNNY. Twilight gets it in his overly anxious head that he MUST defend his wife from the bullies at City Hall, so what does he do? HE INFILTRATES CITY HALL AS A NEW FEMALE HIRE. The world absolutely needs more petty!Twilight! The latest chapter features laxative brownies. Enough said.

Let's start living dangerously by @beannoss: I specifically reread the later parts when dumb Twilight gets over his dumbness and finally talks to Yor! And they kiss again! I love the way huhwaku (beannoss) portrays overthinking Twilight AND overthinking Yor. And also, the simplicity of Yor at the same time. The voice she uses for both of them is refreshing, it really puts you in the mindset of the character. Yor's giggles ("teehee!") as she teases Twilight about his little perfectionist habits are a cute touch to a gentle, heartwarming fic about these two highly competent professionals just starting to take baby steps in how to be competent at a relationship.

Fic that made me emotional:

100% Perfect by @sometimesiship. Where do I begin? How about with the gut aversion I initially had to the premise of a futuristic AI dating bot AU, due to all the tragic, dark AI movies I have watched? But as it neared completion, someone convinced me to give it a try and I AM SO GLAD I DID. You can see my gushing comments in almost every chapter. The development of the relationship between human Yor and AI Loid is so natural, funny at times, poignant always, and beautifully written, even though from an objective standpoint not much exciting stuff happens (I mean canon-typical excitement like murders and spy missions). Sometimesiship has a way of describing emotion that is so raw -- she can portray the same emotion a dozen different ways with analogies and setups and dialogue and whatever -- and it still doesn't feel old. And the emotion that dominated the second half of the story was grief. Basically the grief of loving someone you know you're going to lose. Like being the spouse of a terminal cancer patient. I didn't cry while reading, but it was a closer call than I have had in a VERY long time. So much beauty and humanity in this story. And spoiler (?), it's a happy ending. So I hope you all go check it out!

That's a wrap! If you read this far, stay tuned for a Writer version of Fandom Wrapped 2024!

[cyb3rtarot]

A Peep Into the New Year: 2024 Pick a Pile

Disclaimer: Happy New Year! We’re looking at something to reflect on from the closed year, experiences you may have this year, and a theme for 2024. The experiences are not necessarily in chronological order! Tarot readings are not replacements for professional advice. I’m reading what I see and feel in the current energy, which can change. Your thoughts, energy, and actions are what creates destiny, not the reading!

pile 1⛧pile 2⛧pile 3 pile 4⛧pile 5⛧pile 6

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Pile 1:

Something to Reflect On [Nine of Swords rx, Keeping Up]: hello pile one! You guys really struggled with mental health or neurodivergence last year or for a few years leading up to this year. You may have adopted a defeatist attitude or found it incredibly hard to progress in life. Day to day tasks to take care of yourself may have been difficult. Reflect on the ways you have faced this challenge, even when it seemed impossible. Some of this pile has overcome this. For example, if you had depression, you may no longer be depressed (or it’s not as severe). Others of you are still fighting, but you’ve still exerted a great effort to keep afloat and face anxieties. You should pat yourselves on the back for the ways you’ve advanced—the ways you’ve kept yourself alive even when it was hard. There is a forward momentum you’re carrying into the new year, and it was created with much effort.

A Peep into the New Year… 

You guys will be presented with something from the past, and you will have to choose whether to invest your energy into it. This could be people, past situations you never got closure on, environments, and especially habits. The main thing about this opportunity is that it seems like you guys’ first thought will be to jump back into it. Maybe it “feels” right so you don’t think about it much, or you’re so used to doing it that you just go right along with it the second you get the chance. This situation seems very interesting from your perspective; there’s a strong pull towards it. The cards are not really indicating that this is a definite good or bad thing, it seems neutral or like it can go either way. The card to especially focus on is “impulsiveness.” Regardless of whether this is good or bad, make sure to think about your actions before agreeing to anything (Tiwaz emphasizes making sound decisions). Reflect on ingrained habits and thought patterns that you feed into without a second thought. Impulsiveness can also refer to the nature of the situation; an opportunity may come out of nowhere. How we invest our energy determines who we are and how we grow. We are more likely to remain in old mindsets when we constantly give energy to what has already ended, and only you can decide what from your past belongs in the future. [Impulsiveness (Mars in Aries, 1st house), Curiouser and Curiouser, the World rx, Uncertainty rx, Tiwaz rune]

For some time , you may find yourself absorbed in spirituality or developing new beliefs (for many of you this has already started). This seems like a positive change, however it may take up a lot of your time. You may use your inner or spiritual world as an escape; many of you feel dependent or stifled in a situation. You are being encouraged to dream big (for physical reality too), and use this time to thoroughly plan for life and yourself. Make sure there is a balance between being absorbed in your inner world, and sometimes coming out of that shell to make your dreams real. At some point in this journey you may feel very restless, and that can prompt some of the impulsive behavior mentioned above. Don’t judge yourself for moving too “slowly” or having big dreams, but still make an honest effort towards balancing those dreams/beliefs with reality. You’re also encouraged to maintain balance in how this plays out in your relationships. Don’t despair if someone doesn’t understand you, but also don’t take someone’s word as gospel just because you feel an affinity with them. [Vision (Sun in Pisces, 12th house), Use Your Time Well rx, nine of pentacles sideways, Justice] 

There’s a lot of hope and knowledge surrounding you this year. You’ll be interested in making dreams reality and will want to pursue something new for yourself. I say “for yourself” as there’s an emphasis on this being centered around you. You may approach things with the best-case scenario in mind; this will serve you well. There’s opportunity to be recognized as an individual or for something you do, or this is a hope of yours. There may be interest in physically going somewhere to seize this opportunity (more so farther destinations or longer trips). You will be geared towards learning new things (especially in higher ed or a similar place), working towards recognition of your skills, or starting a personal project. If there are issues at home, I see you or your relatives remaining positive in the face of this adversity (this may also be a familial opportunity, or a family member might receive public attention). You may feel a little lost [in the sauce]. If you’ve delved into spirituality, you might feel disconnected or unsure of your new beliefs. This could be a period where you have to focus on your own ingenuity, wits, and can-do rather than giving it all to your belief system. This can also apply to family. There may be decreased communication with them, or someone moving away. However confusing, this is a more fortunate period of the year. [Optimism (Moon in Sagittarius, 9th house), the Moon, Nature Communication rx, Publicity (Jupiter in Leo, 5th house)]

Overall Theme for the New Year [the Empress, Defense (Mars in Taurus, 2nd house]: the year is going to put you in situations where you’ll have to sit in your confidence and inner security—or develop this—especially to hone impulse control. There are tangible blessings to experience, but you may find yourself being questioned or challenged by those around you, and you yourself may feel antsy to get what you want right away. Rely on your endurance and resilience to get through uncertainties or challenges as you go towards your goals. 

The Empress dons her armor with her few loyal knights by her side. Though she is under siege, she rides into battle smiling. Victory is obviously in her hand. After many bloody hours, the sun sets on the quieted field. The Empress stands tall on her hill, ever smiling, ever the empress, barely scathed. The sun glints off her helmet as it settles beneath the horizon.

Possible examples (but not limited to…): an ex contacting you or trying to rekindle, old friends wanting to hang out, going back to places you used to frequent, snooping on or investigating someone’s social media, someone from the past starting an argument or pettiness against you,  sudden travel opportunity (especially for school), living with parents or a partner, wanting to move out, pressure to get a job, spiritual scammers/predatory spiritual teachers, family strife, getting accepted into a program, publishing art or research, seeking a career in the arts/academia/spirituality, a new spiritual practice or a leap in pre-existing abilities (especially divination and clairvoyance), meditating frequently, interpreting dreams or lucid dreaming, family on the news, building your portfolio or resume

Extra Details: a change in sleep patterns (going both ways, some could be sleeping less due to increased energy and some of you are finally resting more after a period of poor sleep), mental hospitals, marine biology, Jupiter or Mars as a very prominent planet in the natal or 2023/24 solar return chart, bright colored eyes, high hopes, charm casting, spiritual businesses, loves cartoons or wants to be an animator, brothers, the Star may be a significant card for you or both 2023 + 2024 may be very healing years, moving to a coastal/lakeside area (or wanting to), 12th house profection yr

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Pile 2:

Something to Reflect On [Acquisition (Sun in Taurus, 2nd house), the Star]: hi pile two! You can reflect on how your relationship to the physical world has changed. It seems finances or another form of physical comfort was a big focus last year. You’ve either made big strides in these areas or you’ve done healing work on your mindset (for example, focusing on gratitude and optimism about what you have and want). This could refer to your body as well, if you’ve healed or learned better ways to cope with a condition. Or, it could refer to how you physically relate to others, in any kind of affectionate relationship. Now’s a time to see how changes in your outlook have granted you comfort and opportunity, and congratulate yourselves for any big gains. Many of you have sacrificed other parts of your life for this, and now it’s time to focus on how you can increase wellbeing in all areas instead of just the physical.

A Peep into the New Year…:

Some of the year will be particularly good for work or school. You will naturally excel in these or things will flow more smoothly. Especially if you have to pay attention to a lot of details, or if you provide a service to others. However, you may feel disconnected from your environment. For many of you, this refers to the natural environment, but it could also refer to the world or other environments you frequent. This will be a natural byproduct of whatever you’re pursuing at the time (school/work/etc). You could feel trapped or restless, possibly wanting to quit. If this is referring to the world at large, you may feel guilty or defeatist, like no humanitarian or environmental efforts you do will ever be enough. It’s important to take care of your mental health—much of this is from anxiety rather than reflecting the world around you. Bringing something natural into your home/workplace could be beneficial (plants, stones, seashells etc), as well as decorating with things from home if you feel homesick. You may enjoy gardening (especially veggies). Find parks or natural areas where you are, or spend time intentionally finding things you like about your surroundings. If you feel stuck at home rather than away from it, any small thing to change your scenery could help (going outside more, switching your lounging area, etc). Some of you may feel disappointed if you can’t make a long trip somewhere, but consider if a short trip is possible. If you feel humanitarian guilt, volunteering with an immediate, tangible effect can be encouraging (litter cleanup/soup kitchens etc). [Discrimination (Venus in Virgo, 6th house), Nature Communication rx, the Wheel of Fortune, Eight of Swords]

You guys are giving imposter syndrome. You may be in a learning environment where you feel like you don’t belong. You’ll go through the motions and try to adapt through every situation. You might feel like you have to keep your wits about you or always be prepared to say the “right” thing to keep up an image. This can make you feel out of control. But, you’re supposed to be learning; you’re not supposed to know everything. Allow yourself space to grow and make mistakes; don’t depend on someone else to give that or take it away. Feeling anxious or uneasy during a learning curve is natural and doesn't mean you’re a fraud or bad person. Most everyone experiences this. Establish a sense of inner security, or take time to remind yourself of things you’ve aced. For a lot of you, this may be about intimacy; you may feel nervous about navigating closeness with another. You may be more likely to notice everything you’re doing wrong or feel awkward about your performance in the relationship. Communicate with your partner! With the Influence card, your words may come across particularly sweet or sensical during this time, so don’t be afraid  to talk about how you feel (whether with a partner, coworkers, teachers, peers, etc). You can learn much from others. [Bluff (Jupiter in Gemini, 3rd house), the Emperor rx, Kenaz, Influence (Mercury in Libra, 7th house)]

Finally, I see this pile going through an extremely transformative period. This seems to not be from anything directly identifiable; you may not be able to place where this transformation started or what spurred it. This is likely an internal change (that’s not to say external ones won’t also occur, but the cards are pointing to your inner world). You might wake up one day and realize you’re very different, or that you’re changing but don’t know why. This transformation could be centered around your beliefs or self concept. For example, you may feel like you’re stepping into your power, or like you’ve remembered who you and the people around you are. For those that believe in past lives, you may remember a pattern that’s played out in other lives, or you may remember someone in this life has been with you in another. For many of you this could be influenced by a relationship, but mostly, this is about some change of power within you. The cards are neutral; this can play out in any way.  Because of the “manipulation” card, it’s important to make sure that others are not taking away your freedoms and that you’re maintaining a sense of authority over yourself. You may not notice a change at first, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take control of the transformation once you do see it. [Manipulation (Jupiter in Scorpio, 8th house), Choices rx, Eight of Wands sideways, Past Lives/(the Moon)]

Overall Theme for the New Year [Status (Jupiter in Taurus, 2nd house), ten of swords rx]: if last year was focused on material security then I see this continuing in the upcoming year. Either way, the year will bring attention to your physical world and the blessings it has to offer. You will not only be focused on security, but also be prompted to enjoy what you have already created, especially if you began projects, jobs, studies, or other ambitions last year. You may find more comfort in material things than usual, such as a lot of shopping or eating new foods (it may be easy to overindulge!). Many of you are on the younger side getting your first “real” or serious job, so this may be excitement caused by a stable source of income. There is recognition for what you tangibly contribute to your environment. You will be valued in the groups you’re in or will feel empowered to find such a space. If your job or studies involve a lot of verbal speaking (such as public speaking, pitching ideas), this in particular could be very beneficial or encouraged (this makes some of you anxious, it’s ok!). However, this extends to all forms of communication. If you are in a committed relationship, your partner may also experience similar blessings. Make sure to clearly communicate with them and keep an eye on power dynamics in the relationship. This year will prompt you to re-evaluate what you’ve carried from your past, though I feel this is the distant past. Like mindsets you started developing in childhood, but this can extend to past lives if you believe in them.

The monarchs stand on the balcony of their castle. On one side they can see a vast green hill rolling towards the woods. On the other side, their small but stunning kingdom. Their hearts swell, because they have built this kingdom with their own two hands. They have helped put the people’s homes together, they have farmed food themselves. It has not always been easy to safeguard a kingdom against the shifting forces of nature, but they’ve done it. Dawn illuminates the fruit of their labor.

Possible examples (but not limited to…): missing your hometown, living in an urban area/spending all day indoors and wishing to be in nature, troubles going back home (for example, wanting to go back but your family telling you to keep at it), living on your own for the first time (especially at a distance from family, some are wanting to study abroad), volunteering, mutual aid, community work, humanitarian jobs (non-profit?), crystals (some of you do a spiritual practice with crystals at night?), feeling uncertain about beliefs, working on a team or group project, relationship or work anxiety, a “frog in pot” situation (a situation that degrades so slowly that you don’t notice), recognition in school or work, changing your self beliefs & self concept, a change to self esteem, past life memories/spiritual work, working on relationship confidence, developing parts of yourself you’ve neglected (especially anything set aside while working on physical security), big life events that are outside your control but have a direct impact on you, career/academic advancement/promotion, internships, a work crush or relationship from a job (careful lol), or a relationship with someone you once worked with, visiting loved ones at work, nostalgia or deja-vu

Extra Details: basketball, football, STEM or business (for STEM i’m getting technology or tech-business), family home is two stories and/or on a property with a large yard/backyard, recognizing people from past lives, fairytale love, Mercury as a prominent planet in your profection year or solar return, a romantic or intimate relationship carrying over from this year to the next, manifestation/law of assumption, friend or partner who works as an artist, some of you like the little mermaid or mermaid stories (or you feel like Ariel), a partner in a noticeably higher position/financial status than you and may live with them (you guys in particular should pay attention to power dynamics)—yall please LEAVE if somebody “decides” you should not talk to or go out with your friends & family (even if those people are bothersome to you that’s YOUR decision to make)

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Pile 3:

Something to Reflect On [Investigate, Justice sideways]: hello pile three! You are being called to evaluate how you allocate your energy. Most of this pile puts a ton of energy into specific tasks to the point where they don’t have a lot left for themselves or other areas. Specifically, I am getting most of you may be taken advantage of by the people in your life, and that this isn’t something you readily notice. This varies per individual. People might ask a lot of favors from you, and because you think it’s your duty or obligation, you always fulfill them. Maybe this is a family member who expects you to always be there to do certain tasks no matter what you have going on (a lot of you seem to have a really stern guardian figure). This could be a partner who places a lot of emotional or domestic burdens on you. It could be a workplace. Whatever the situation, the main message here is to think about it, but then reflect on it again. I think a lot of you aren’t as critical of this behavior as you could be, which is why you have to really evaluate if the ways you spend energy are detrimental to other areas of life. As Justice is sideways, some of you are not necessarily in such a situation, but now is a good time for you to evaluate how balanced you really are. Either way, you are also being prompted to really think about what you’re going to do if adjustments are needed; don’t fly off the handle or impulsively react.

A very specific message is some of you may be victims of shady or criminal behavior (already happened). I’m not getting anything huge, but you’re asked to really find the facts of the situation and not blindly accept convenient stories. Some of you may live with others and may have noticed a lot of your items or money going missing? I don’t usually write out the phrases on the oracle cards, but yours says: “look closely, ask questions, think before acting.” Some of you may be part of ongoing investigations, in which case this is referring to that. 

A Peep into the New Year…: 

There is a mental transformation, almost an awakening of sorts. This will be a development of your inner guidance, intuition, or sense. You will be pushed to see that you can in fact trust yourself, and that you have enough wisdom (or the capacity to develop it) to navigate life with your own will. The imagery on the cards with your rune suggests an integration. I feel this part of your mind has always been present, however you may be the kind of person to frequently second guess yourself or to think your own ideas/advice inferior to others (or perhaps others have tried to mentally dominate you and replace your ideas with theirs). Whatever your situation, your inner “knowing” and wisdom will be coming forth to join your conscious decision-making skills. But, it seems you will mentally resist this, or that this period may be confusing to you. You may feel scatter-brained, anxious, or confused a lot (if this becomes very distressing then I encourage you to access any accessible mental health resources). Perhaps you feeling this way is actually what is going to trigger the transformation. You will need to give yourself a lot of grace to evolve your mind. You may try to logically find solutions to problems or continue using old thought patterns, but this period is going to push different ways of thinking you're not used to. For example, if you always try to make very rational choices, you may need to think creatively or factor in gut feelings to arrive at a good decision. You may find yourself being questioned by those close to you who don’t understand your thinking, and this may require diplomatic communication. Overall, your mental activities can guide you to a good place, but it’s a matter of trusting your own guidance—even if others belittle your ability to think for yourself. [Flattery (Venus in Gemini, 3rd house), Guidance, Dagaz, Queen of Swords rx]

I feel this experience is related to the above and for many it will co-occur; I also see a period where you have mental resistance up. The ideals, compromises, and decisions you have chosen to live with will be under a magnifying glass. Mental routine and comfort will be challenged as you re-evaluate what your beliefs are, especially about yourselves. What are your values, what can you endure to live a more fulfilling life? Some of you have a tendency to get or stay in situations where external forces (mainly people) have a lot of control over your life; codependency. If so, this energy is related to that, especially if this describes your family life. There’s a lot of stubborn or slow-moving energy here; many of you may try to dismiss the questions or changes that are knocking at your door. You may use the physical to distract you, like your daily routine or job. At the same time, if you aspire to change, you may have to defend yourself against others a lot. This could encourage that slow-moving energy, as you may feel tense if challenged by others. Overall, this is a time of endurance. Allow slow, steady adjustments to your mindset + reality as you determine who you are and what you want. [Resistance (Mercury in Taurus, 2nd house), Forget Who You Are rx, I Want to Be a Queen rx, seven of wands]

Lastly, I see you will eventually be called to act upon the ideas you have developed during your transformation—putting your plans into action. With Mercury in cardinal Earth paired with the knight of mind, there will be a drive and ambition to realize the reality you’ve been pining for. The energy here is that no matter what, you're committing to the course you’ve set, regardless of people or obstacles. This time period will pass judgment on what you've been contemplating for so long—the reality you have been imagining yourself in during the more stagnant parts of the year (and maybe last year as well?) While I do feel like most of this will be coming from your own willpower, with the major arcana, you may be presented with some kind of opportunity or circumstance that will further empower you. This may come after you take the first steps to move towards what you want. This could be about pursuing something in your career or material path, but I think it will extend into any part of your life that you've spent a ton of time thinking about. This period will remind you that dreams are not necessarily reality, yet they guide reality once you are ready to do something. If you did experience tense relationships with family or others throughout the year, I see you getting more of a handle on this and feeling more prepared to take on their challenging words (not that you have to keep going back and forth with these people). [Organization (Mercury in Capricorn, 10th house), Fighting, Judgement, two of wands rx]

Overall Theme for the New Year [Idealism (Sun in Aquarius, 11th house), the Hanged Man]: this year is about radical changes in perspective. Not only can you dare to dream, but you can also dare to make those dreams reality. Your mind is precious—protect and use it as much as possible. You may have had a complicated relationship with your desires & dreams in the past. Maybe others' pessimism affected you, and 2024 will prompt you to challenge limiting beliefs you’ve absorbed. This is a year where you realize that your hopes don’t have to detract from real life, they can be the seeds. Friends and community are especially significant in your 2024 energy.

A smile sits on the face of this philosopher, though this is not a title they chose for themselves. The symposium has hushed into suspicious and questioning tones, eyes on the philosopher who has not even said much at all. But what they have said, well, where do they get off? Their ideas are certainly not from here. They speak of a fantasy world where things are better than they are and the status quo is rudely disregarded. Where equality and fairness are true and not only words. The wise men furrow their brows and think, “foolish youth.” The philosopher explains nothing more; what is understood does not have to be explained. But, the seeds are sown. Quietly, in the hearts of the eternally foolish, the design of a better world is constructed.

Possible examples (but not limited to…): feeling called towards a job or interest but others around you not agreeing, feeling pulled towards many different directions, unsure of your “calling,” realizing something you want for yourself, changing your beliefs (especially about your role in the world, or about social expectations such as gender roles?), or a period where you’re interested in new beliefs but you try to deny this interest. Standing your ground, finding strategic ways to communicate with those around you (including ways to keep plans to yourself). At one point (or now) you may be wanting to escape or move far away, but later in the year you may actually lose interest in this or want to move somewhere that’s not as far. Career developments or planning, personal projects, applying to jobs or networking (part of this may feel discouraging or stagnant but don’t lose hope!), you may feel more connected to animals or nature this year (especially if you live in a wooded area), starting a business (especially with friends—crafts/handmade items? Or you might go to artists fairs & markets), working a “not as serious” or part-time job while you plan for a business/career, saving money

Extra Details: naivety, law enforcement or court case, some of you have info about a case you have not brought to the investigators? (I’m not giving legal advice here lol it just came to mind). Specific family member that’s very domineering (especially over you), though I am getting this is a pattern in your other relationships too (for some this person has no/almost no water placements in their natal chart? They could have very bright blue eyes). You may bite your tongue a LOT with this person but this is changing for many (possibly some arguments with them). Some of y’all really like peanut/nut butter 😭? Interest in the arts (or another field that’s not respected) that you’ve never seriously pursued, hiding your interest in artistic or “childish” things, coming from a conservative culture, the main one doing housework, having to be very observant of someone’s behavior to know the “right way” to talk to them so the conversation doesn’t go south? This pile has a way with words, like you naturally phrase things figuratively or poetically. “The time is now bitch, the time is now!! The war’s already started!!” Breaking Bad? Nature themed or inspired art. Mercury may be very important or aspected in the natal chart (possibly solar return as well to a lesser extent). 11th house may be prominent too

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Pile 4:

Something to Reflect On [the Tower, Queen of Pentacles]: hi pile 4! In this past year or the one before, something major shook up your life. Something shook your sense of security to the core. It challenged the notion of control, and you’ve had to rebuild it from the ground up. This feels like something that came out of nowhere, a life event that you know could happen to anyone but you either don’t expect it to happen to you when it does or it’s something you can’t plan for (like a sudden death/illness, breakup out of nowhere, houselessness/kicked out, I keep thinking you felt “dethroned”). As the Queen of Pentacles came after the tower and this pile had a very calming energy when I connected to you, you guys have started to or already come to terms with what happened. You’re picking up the pieces and getting back on your inner throne, though many of you are still dealing with the fallout of these circumstances. You guys should appreciate how far you’ve come in your inner world, or at least your amazing and impressive endurance. I don’t know why but there’s an emphasis on complimenting your endurance lol, the word “honorable” came to mind. This pile seems to have been through something incredibly hard (maybe on a physical level) that a lot of people would have folded under. Some of you had an opportunity to get out using shady means (like cheating or harming others, going against some kind of morals) and in the end you decided to stay by your integrity. This pile should really appreciate themselves, as you’re the one who has carried yourself through the tough storms.

A Peep into the New Year…:

At least one part of the year, if not the whole year, will feel jam-packed with a lot of different things happening. This is a blessed time where by your own willpower, abilities, and individuality, you’ll be able to receive something beautiful. I hear “convenience,” so, very convenient opportunities may come your way. Someone else could help arrange a blessing, or something could come into your life that makes it easier, but this is because of who you are as a person. This period may feel like a dream, like the Sun coming out after the clouds held it hostage. Things will happen that will help you to feel reconnected with life and the universe—your role in the scheme of things—and they may happen close together. This may be a little disorienting, so try incorporating some grounding practices into your life, or something that addresses feelings of disconnect (ex, meditation). I am also seeing a relationship focused on sensuality. This is new for most of you and may be with someone you already know. The relationship may begin with the help of someone else (maybe someone introduced you). This doesn’t seem to be the main event though; this relationship is one thing and the blessings I was talking about are another. Throughout everything, it’s highly emphasized to maintain your individuality. Either through the relationship or other things happening, you may feel the need to change yourself, or feel like a cog in the machine. The new developments could feel tiresome or too much for you. On a physical level, it may be a lot (especially if you have a job including manual labor/moving things). Not only do you need to take care of your body + needs, but also remember your uniqueness is needed. You’re not a spare part; you don’t need to be shaped to conform like others. Growing and changing is great, but the greatness comes from authenticity and the beauty of your specific path. Not from making yourself something you’re not. Alternatively, you may already be living like this and grow tired of it. [Fortune (Sun in Leo, 5th house), Existence, Such a Curious Dream rx, Romance (Venus in Taurus, 2nd house), Conditioning, Exhaustion]

Possibly related to the tiredness I mentioned, there may be a time where things seem totally out of your control—as if the wheel of life is turning and not waiting for you to catch up. There are bigger forces here, like institutions or other people that have control & importance over you. For example, higher education, local/state governments, the legal system. Something will stress you out, possibly news or the lack of agency you feel. This seems like a life pattern for this pile; it could trigger old feelings of lacking control. The unique qualities you have are what helps you move through these times, not what hinders you. The last card says “you will make it through this.” This period is bringing a cycle to the end (ten of swords was on the bottom of the deck); don’t catastrophize. The wheel of life is constantly turning, but you are also part of the wheel. I don’t know what it is about this pile but over and over your cards are pointing out how your individuality and the unique way your life has played out is your strength through all things (one of your cards says “there are not many like you!”). There may be a few things going on during this period that you have to juggle or prioritize over something you really wanted to do. A kind relationship with yourself is your foundation to face the world. The relationships around you will also be important, and may be one of the things making your life feel odd at this time (this news could be developments in a friend’s life). Maintaining bonds, internal and external, will create small blessings as you work towards peace. [Friendship (Moon in Cancer, 4th house), You Are Rare and Free, the Emperor rx, Shine Bright Like a Candle, Raidho rune]

Not every single oracle card referencing relationships I’m soo 😭. In fact, in every experience I read for you guys, something came out about relationships or loving someone. So obviously lol, companionships of all kinds are a large focus. This person (or people) will challenge you to close one of the constant cycles in your life—something regarding communication. Many of you have struggled to authentically communicate, possibly in regards to whatever it is about your individuality that keeps coming out. Maybe you tried to downplay or pretend in your relationships, and this has perpetuated a toxic loop (ex, if you are disabled, you may have downplayed the level of support you need). Your relationships will prompt you to be true, to see if you are up to the task of presenting yourself with all your lumps & bumps and saying, “here I am,” instead of, “don’t look at me.” They will also prompt you to rethink the role you play in healthy communication. You might have downplayed how you felt about others, like pretending to accept things you weren’t okay with. How this plays out will be different for everyone; maybe you will be with someone who understands you easily for once. It could be someone who understands you as long as you actually say something. Or, you may have to speak up for yourself and work through that struggle. Whatever the case, there’s an opportunity to grow through care & intimacy. You got another Sun card—the most fortuitous suite in the deck—so there’s a positive connotation to your bonds. With the Sun, Venus, and Moon all here (and the 2nd, 7th, and 9th house), I think these will be very compelling or fulfilling. You may interact a lot with someone who expands your worldview. But, even if someone is so close they feel telepathic, remember to still communicate and be conscious of cycles! [Acquisition (Sun in Taurus, 2nd house), Flirtation (Venus in Sagittarius, 9th house), Companionship (Moon in Libra, 7th house), Knight of Swords rx, the World]

Overall Theme for the New Year [Beyond Illusion, two of wands]: there's a strong emphasis on “dream-like” feelings this year. You may feel disoriented in the currents of life. You can either put your focus into the ever-changing external world and try to find your footing in those currents, or you can develop your stronghold in your inner world. By turning inward and looking at yourself without the outer noise, you can figure out what makes your soul feel good. You can learn more about yourself, what you’re capable of, and continue to develop security that cannot be washed away by what people say or do. When you only focus on the external, you focus on reacting. When you focus on the internal, you simply are, and you find the source of things.

A stray wanderer stands at the crossroads of themselves. To go left is to dream, where all the world resides. To go right is to wake up, to be with oneself, but not alone. Neither road promises soft steps nor uncalloused feet; a journey it will be either way. The wanderer is not hurried; all of eternity unfolds at the crossroads. They sit in the fork of the path and meditate.

Possible examples (but not limited to…): international travel, a tiring job (especially physically), shedding personas, increase in meditation, dreams, or spirituality, journaling/returning to journaling. A new lover, friends w/ benefits, or increased physical affection in a current relationship, someone giving you something or helping you to show appreciation, an arranged date, challenges to enjoying new things (ex, you travel but feel discouraged by how tiring it is due to health issues. So instead of telling those who want to be with you to go without you, maybe ask for a day of rest once you arrive). Going on hikes, camping, new activities in nature. Developments or news about something with the government or legal system (some kind of welfare, legal case? ), someone close moving away (especially for school), deciding to be friends instead of partners (this theme came out twice, you may flip flop between romance & friendship), very specific but someone you know may be worried about doing time or may get out of prison. Having to prioritize responsibility over a hobby or relationship, applying to school or for government assistance. Relationships that brings financial blessings or gifts, shedding old beliefs about relationships

Another very specific message: you may start or be in a relationship with a barista, bartender, or waiter. They may have an interesting relationship with money, like being very frugal or super generous. They may have a stocky build, very active (or you are and they contrast that). Even if they work with alcohol some do not drink at all. They may drink black coffee or tea instead. Some of them hoard.

Extra Details: living in a car, more life experience than other piles (age wise there are more people in their 30s+), house fire or having to escape your house in the past, partner suddenly kicked you out, living with parents, frosted flakes? Wanting children (or more) but unsure how this will work. Getting back on one’s feet, feeling excited or anticipating (especially about a job), health issues affecting work or that you got from work. You could think poetically/ metaphorically. A strong, solid, compelling energy when you embrace yourself. Don’t be flippant with birth control or protection even if you think you’re not fertile, especially with new, untested partners. Azealia Banks (212), Nicki Minaj. Strong Leo and fixed placement energy [at least in 2024], a person very in-tune with nature or who works with the environment (this could be you but seems more like someone you’ll get to know. Park ranger?) Wearing or using something special at work (an accommodation?). Disabilities, chronic illness/injuries (especially cerebral palsy or burns). Adult or spooky cartoons. Getting out of prison, probation, halfway house. The Lich (“I am the ceaseless wheel”), visual arts/making crafts (wanting to go to school for it; struggling to make time). Not completing or struggling in education, reading & speaking troubles (stutters?). Feeling perceived as uneducated or ineloquent, so you come up with unique ways to be understood. The way things go- beabadoobee (might remind you of your communication troubles).

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Pile 5:

Something to Reflect On [Endurance (Sun in Scorpio, 8th house), Resistance (Mercury in Taurus, 2nd house), Knight of Cups rx]: hi pile five! You guys really had to defend yourself last year? Or this is a trend in your life. Earlier in the year (or life) you expected and sought support from loved ones but in the end you had to protect yourself from those people, or you were in a struggle with them. Either because of incompatibility or underlying issues (mental, emotional, etc) you had to rescind your relationship with them, or they became an adversary to you. This could represent a breakup (any kind) or family relations, but one to two people in particular are getting highlighted (such as a love interest and also a parent figure). You should appreciate how you’ve shown up for yourself and survived—congratulate yourself for being strong even when you shouldn’t have had to be. Especially because this experience seemed to be very transformative or harsh. But, also analyze the ways this could've pushed you into a shell. There may be harmful habits you picked up in order to survive (especially in communication, for example being very defensive, closed off. You might struggle with snapping at people or feeling attacked). 

A specific message for some is you may have spent a lot of time pursuing someone who didn’t want you. You expected them to eventually come around if you kept at it? And you are called to reflect on different aspects of that, such as respect for your own time and others’ boundaries.

A Peep into the New Year…:

A portion of the year will be defined by communication or having a lot of ideas at once. This has to do with a conventional institution: school, jobs, marriage, religion, etc. You might be thinking of tons of different things you want to do but find it hard to settle on one or know what’s needed to accomplish your goals. There’s a lot of energy but not necessarily a lot of focus, more so planning, brainstorming, & communicating. These ideas might be centered on how you can be of service to the world, your life path, or how you can pursue a conventional route while putting your own spin on it. A specific message for some is you could want to pursue something that’ll help animals/the environment, or a humanitarian role (this could be anything from veganism to getting a non-profit job, etc). You may receive news about an engagement or marriage. If the institution does refer to religion, you could be very vocal about your beliefs at this time, but might get mixed responses. This may cause tension in the family or social circle. [Excitement (Mercury in Gemini, 3rd house), the Hierophant, Messages for a Rabbit, The Right Way rx]

Most likely related to the above, there’ll be a period where you decide to part ways with tradition. After much thinking, you may find something you thought you could pursue or endure is not for you—even though it’s what’s expected of you. This may be isolating, or you ‘ll feel weird compared to those around you. Or, you might spend more time with people who understand your decisions and self-expression—people who also broke away from tradition. This will be a sensitive time; you’ll be more in tune with your emotions and the emotions of others. Old feelings can surface, particularly of abandonment, loneliness, and disappointment. This could be very overwhelming, so take extra care of your mental and emotional health. You might grieve experiences you will no longer have now that you are committing to going a different way (example, you might feel left behind by friends who are going to college if you decide not to do that). Feel what you need to commit to your path. There could be a slight struggle in truly letting go of whatever this is, especially if it’s a belief system. Also allow yourself grace, patience, space, and empathy in getting used to changes. [Empathy (Moon in Pisces, 12th house), four of pentacles sideways, We’re All Mad Here, the Hierophant rx]

After dealing with others'/society’s expectations of you for so long, and even your own expectations of yourself, you may suddenly charge forth, revitalized. You will be empowered to make a life for yourself with your own two hands. Something about your body is significant; whatever path you decide on may include some kind of physical work (ex, hand-made art, modeling, physical labor etc, could also refer to moving & travel). If you are pregnant or get pregnant, this is in reference to your labor or last trimester. Shortly before this period you will feel you are carrying a burden that's not yours to carry. This can be others’ expectations, or it could refer to any duties you have been maintaining but don’t have your heart in. When you enter this time period, you may have a flare of indignation or feel upset that you've been living according to what others say and not your own truth. Hone this feeling into productivity. Example, if you feel angry that someone doesn’t believe in your art, make more art! You might also have a surge of confidence and stand up for yourself like never before, though be careful not to waste energy on those who refuse to understand. Whatever your case is, this will be a time to embrace your own truth and let go of those who seek to live through or control you. You will be setting out on your own in some way. You’ll break free of those ideas once believed to be your own, but now are clearly things others conditioned into you. You will seek freedom from the burden of not being yourself. [Birth (Venus in Cancer, 4th house), Enterprise (Jupiter in Aries, 1st house), Keep Your Temper rx, ]

Overall Theme for the New Year [Believe, Ostentation]: this year will challenge you to believe in yourself more. It’s not that this will get much easier. It’s your own constant effort showing that no matter what, you can rely on yourself. That your worth is far greater than what others think—you can accomplish what you set your mind to. Some of you may be afraid of following your own path due to material hardships. This is understandable, but whatever is giving you anxiety, know that building inner security is what enables people to make big leaps. Your emotions will be incredibly important guides for you this year. Learning to accept and maintain your emotional state will be part of what shows you your own unshakeable foundation. If you put in the work towards loving and supporting yourself, you will be flaunting (boasting even) self-confidence like never before.

The monarch rides through the streets of their kingdom, head held oh-so high. Is this the notorious royal descendant, are the rumors all true? Whispers and strange glances spread down the road like wildfire. Everyone wants a look—a taste—so they may judge this stranger themselves. They certainly have heard the terrible stories and fearful feats attributed to them, and if they know what’s good for them they’ll clear the air. But the monarch says nothing to anyone. Should they hold their head any higher, they will surely hurt their neck! There’s no need to explain anything, nor do they need to make a fancy show of themselves for the people’s opinion. Their crown is their confidence; it ripples around them like silk. The power in their gaze explains everything anyone needs to know.

Possible examples (but not limited to…): applying to universities or jobs, building a resume, changes in beliefs about your role in the world, environment, or ecosystem, changes in spiritual & religious beliefs that put you at odds with others, changes in diet, brainstorming careers or majors, taking a non-traditional route in school. Leaving a religion or similar system, standing up for yourself against loved ones, a new project/business/art form/career path, graduating, moving away or moving to another relative’s home, getting pregnant, if you are or get pregnant then you may be especially emotional during your second trimester, making a medical decision for yourself, cutting people off (especially toxic family), writing a lot (you may write letters or lots of notes too), growing out of a childhood belief, starting a job (especially part-time, or as a supplement to something else)

Extra Details: black holes, red hair or red as a common color in your style (also green), communion, wanting your suffering to be recognized, cheerleaders, high school students, spending time (especially Summer) in the countryside and by the ocean (sea creatures are significant. Some of you may want to go vegan/vegetarian but are struggling because you love seafood?), a relative (mostly female) who lives in a more rural area you can go stay with, really liking animated movies, especially animated fairy tales or the anime fairy tale? Might also like zombie media (shows etc) or feel like a zombie. Detail-oriented rather than big-picture focused, might tend to just say or blurt out whatever you want, Catholic stigmata?

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Pile 6:

Something to Reflect On [ten of cups rx, the Emperor]: hi pile six! Last year there was a disappointment, loss, or ending with a loved one, or someone in your support system. This could be anything from a breakup, to a family death (found family?), or feeling a lack of fulfillment with those around you. You had to remain strong through this loss of connection and fill the void it left. You could’ve felt like you were drowning in the emotional turbulence you endured (literal drowning is significant to some). You could’ve also felt lonely and like you had to be strong for whoever was left. Even though this doesn’t make the disappointment or grief easier to bear, please appreciate how you show up for yourself and others. 

A Peep into the New Year…:

Possibly related to the above message, you’ll be shouldering a burden that’s not entirely yours to carry. There’s a situation that’ll be unfair or unbalanced, and this will take a toll on you. This could be a legal case, something law-related like a will, inheritance, contract, or something where stipulations are involved. Or, it could be something where you feel you’re getting the short end of the stick and having to take on a duty that’s hoisted on you. If you recently had a death in the family, this is likely related to the aftermath (a funeral or burial? I heard “bury”). Through ideas, communication, or ingenuity (it could be your own or someone else’s), balance will be restored to the situation. This will likely involve letting go of something you were making yourself do (I hear “promise,” you may have to rescind a promise that’s become toxic?). This felt very stifling and anxiety-inducing, but a good outcome is on the horizon. Your word may carry a lot of power in this situation, which may be why you ultimately get to decide if this carries on in your life or not. [Influence (Mercury in Libra, 7th house), Law is not Justice rx, the Burden, the Sun rx]

For a portion of the year, financial & material achievement will be of greater importance. More stability or success can come in. If you have a job or business, you may have positive developments if you put in effort. However, there’s something in your life that’s pulling on you, or there’s some kind of dependent relationship related to this material success. For example, building your savings by living with family. Or, there may be something that’s taking a lot of your attention and making it hard to focus on your success. However, it seems any situation that makes you feel dependent or dissatisfied during this period will encourage you to put even more energy into advancing. Despite stability or comfort, you’ll be focused on going your own way or working towards goals. You’ll seek to protect what’s important to you by putting more of yourself into it. If you have children, they could feel more dependent on you at this time, or you could feel more responsibility towards them. This can also refer to the relationship with your own family. Pregnancy may be more likely. No matter the case, this period will be one of renewal where you’re focused on building up for the future. You may be less inclined to share your plans with others, despite the attention you receive. [Riches (Saturn in Capricorn, 10th house), 9 of pentacles rx, the Chariot, Berkano rune]

Finally, there’s a part of the year where you need to safeguard your own interests. The message came out a bit choppy but I will try my best to convey it. For some or all of the year, you may experience a surge in confidence and a sense of knowing. This could be in general, or it could especially be confidence placed in a person. Either way, the message I got was “be careful once you’re confident.” There will be events placed along your year that will differentiate between confidence, impulsiveness, and arrogance, but when you feel very sure, all of them can seem the same. Make sure to always use your wisdom and not just confidence alone as your guide. Don’t think yourself above others, don’t be a braggart, and don’t make impulsive decisions because you think the consequences won’t happen. This could be a message about yourself, or it could relate to someone challenging something you hold dear. What I’m saying might sound silly because I don’t think you’re the type to be haughty, if anything this pile is understanding of reality based on your experiences. So that’s why I’m trying to convey that I think this is something you would normally never think about, things you might take for granted. This can include your trust in someone or something to do with your body? An inheritance, or something you receive(d) through family, including a home. You are being asked to put in an honest effort and cover your bases instead of bluffing through situations. Example, make sure your inner security is based on yourself and not on someone being there to give it to you. Make sure you pay attention to your body’s needs instead of assuming you’ll feel perfect. Especially if a genetic condition runs in your family, pay attention to that. There are two Saturn cards in this part of your reading. Put in the honest work, protect yourself, be patient and fair without impulsiveness, and you can sail through choppy waters. [Inheritance (Saturn in Scorpio, 8th house), King of Cups, Risk (Saturn in Aries, 1st house), Uncertainty rx]

Overall Theme for the New Year [Manage To Be Glad, Nauthiz rune]: create your own happiness; don’t allow external circumstances to dictate your entire wellbeing. This year is about life lessons and effort. Embrace these as part of everyone’s path—including yours—and you won’t struggle against the tide. Going down too-good-to-be-true shortcuts and overindulging in fantasy both come with consequences later. Be attentive to your needs and not just your wants. Most importantly, be aware that your actions create short and long-term effects; just ignoring the future does not undo the ripples of your decisions. Be mindful of how you treat yourself and the kind of reality you create for future you.

Witch—that’s what they call the one in the woods. Perhaps you’ll see them at their doorstep, dressed in all black, petting the cat in their arms (surely a familiar). Maybe you’ll see the candlelight burning into the late night when one is up to no good. But are they a witch? They are wise and avoid missteps by careful planning. To an outsider it’s magic, but to the witch it is only common sense.

Possible examples (but not limited to…): resolving funeral/end-of-life matters (for a recent death), resolving ongoing legal questions or troubles after feeling anxious, carefully reviewing contracts or agreements, choosing yourself or to withdraw some of the care you give to others, speaking up for yourself or finding your voice, needing a vacation, living with family, movement in the family home, wanting a different job or career, taking care of family or children—or being taken care of, making a leap towards a material goal, setting up plans or money for the future, being recognized at work or by peers, super specific message but you could go on a lot of walks (specifically late at night) with a close friend or partner, spending time in a different house than usual, close friendship or needing friends for emotional support, friends w/ benefits, pregnancy-related scares or other sudden news about one’s body, saturn return, finding out you didn’t really know someone, a pattern from the past replaying, receiving inheritance, someone challenging a relationship

[18+ only message] For any that do SW, be very mindful of your circle and clients, as well as who gets your pictures, as there may be some jealous or revengeful energy surrounding that. For others that don’t do SW but may send 18+ pics, the same applies. Take wise precautions regardless of who gets them.

Extra Details: the ocean, trauma regarding water (but still drawn to it at the same time?), Yellow by Coldplay, diamonds, crystals (especially yellow ones?), Poker Face by Lady Gaga, South America (especially the northern part of S America like Colombia), Roman Holiday? Law school or firm, body dysmorphia, inheritance from a father figure (could be a grandpa—very thick round glasses, bald on top with feathery white hair, tan, very thick silver mustache, wore long sleeve button up shirts a lot, smiles a lot, gave you money, liked coffee a lot?), Neville Goddard, blood disorders or inherited disorders, chromosomal? Saturn as a prominent planet in the natal chart, solar return, or profection year (could have also been prominent in the chart of whoever passed recently), being the responsible or older child

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[blazehedgehog]

After watching SAGE's 2024 trailer, you ever get the feeling that most people want to be making indie games instead of fan games nowadays,? Every year there's been less and less fan works there.

This is the first year I've really felt it in any meaningful way.

There have been attempts for more than a decade to rename SAGE to drop the "Sonic" part. I've always pushed back against that and at this point the branding is too strong to give up, I think. People know about and come to SAGE because the brand is strong. Renaming it would be a death sentence.

Taking off my business hat, it's a bummer to see fangames in the minority here. Everybody wants to hop on that indie game gravy train and chase the success of Pizza Tower (seriously, count how many Pizza Tower clones are in the trailer this year) or Freedom Planet or Spark the Electric Jester or whatever.

And it's easy to congratulate people for striking out on their own and making original games. I was one of the many voices urging Sabrina to divorce Freedom Planet from the Sonic franchise and make it into an original game she could sell. So she ran a crowdfunding campaign (multiple, actually), was successful, and now we have two Freedom Planet games. And that's great!

But... does that mean all fangames should go away forever?

The example I lean on the hardest is comic books.

A lot of the guys who created the biggest super heroes aren't around anymore. They gave up control long ago or are straight up dead now. These books are effectively officialized fanfiction now, as are the $300,000,000 movies based on them. An ever-increasing number of people writing, drawing and directing these characters today were not alive when they were originally created.

But people still keep writing Batman stories, officially or otherwise. Because there are some stories you can only tell with Batman. Now, you could break off and make your own character that's similar to Batman, build up this history for him, and then finally tell your original story with that character. And maybe that's satisfying, to have built something of your own like that.

But for one: that's a lot of work. Batman is interesting because he has decades (almost a century now) of history behind him to play off of and work with. There are people out there who will tell you to just start writing your dream story and forget about building up to it first, but that's more about motivation and confidence than the idea that stories don't need historical context.

And two: that's already been done.

There's a good chance you know who Rob Liefeld is from his, uh, "distinctive" art style. He also created Deadpool, a katana-wielding mercenary assassin that dresses in red and black, whose real name is Wade Wilson. But before Deadpool, he created Deathstroke, a katana-wielding mercenary assassin that dresses in orange and black, whose real name is Slade Wilson.

Here is a guy who has built a career on copying his own work (and the work of others) over and over and over again.

Did it make Rob Liefeld rich and famous? Technically yes, but he kind of got rich because other people made better work using his characters, and he's famous for being kind of a hack.

So which is better?

Creative output you can do right here, right now, today, but is considered "fanfiction" or "fanart" or a "fangame", which may or may not lead to you being the person handling the official thing at some point down the road...

Or spending years of your life toiling to bring an original concept to life, and even if you struggle through all of the boredom and hardship of getting your original product out the door, it gets lost in the noise of now-million other creators trying to do the exact same thing. And then, at the end of your launch, after 2, 3, even 5 years of working and working and working, you've only made enough money to cover rent on your apartment for a month and a half.

Or, to put it another way:

Are you ditching fangame development because you have a legitimately great story you want to tell, or are you just doing it because you can't make money on a fangame?

Are you just creating another Bloodstrike?

As someone who has struggled to justify putting lots of hard work into a fangame myself, and have both made very popular fangames and some not-so-great original games, I don't know if I have a definitive answer for you. But I do wish there were more fangames at the fangaming event, and I will say, as always, if I could get paid a livable wage for making fangames, I would drop everything and do it in a heartbeat.

[marengogo]

Rambling in INFJese - Part 10: Queerful In South Korea

SGMB and RPWP focused playlist

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

🐺 — 🐺 — 🐺—

Gurls, Bois and Enbies … Hellooooooooooo 📢 Yes, I’m finally, officially, back from my travels.

Am I feeling relaxed and refreshed?

NO.

In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m more tired than when I left 😬. You see, there was more excitement than I thought, or even budgeted for, but, lowkey highkey I knew it was going to turn out like that, so, it was what it was and it was unforgettable 😊💜. 

Now, on to the topic of today!

As the title kinda spoils, I would like to bring forth the topic of queerness in present day Korea, touching upon specific sub-subjects within this main-theme, which you will discover as you keep reading.

In order to provide more context and understanding, I’ll have to bring up a bit of Geography, a tad of Politics and a lot of History, and let me make this clear, even though I have been out of politics for quite some time I used to be very invested in world politics … I am presently indeed somewhat annoyed, because there seems to be a lot of misinformation that has been going around with regards to what it might mean to be gay/queer person in South Korea, in the big year of 2024, which is why I’d also like to encourage us to be proactive and do some research, on our own, with the available resources that are out there. I know it sounds heavy, but I promise I’ll try and make it as least cumbersome, and as much relatable to what might concern all Queer people, and JK and JM of course, as possible ✌🏾.

Let’s start with some Geography.

Asia … is a big ass continent. Because it is so big, amongst the people who make these kind of decisions, it was decided that this continent would have to be divided into 5 regions: Central, East, South, Southeast and West. The regions we are going to be concerned with are East and Southeast also known as ASEAN. The East has a total of 8 countries, out of which we are going to focus on 4 being; China, Japan, South Korea and Taiwan, while the Southeast has a total of 11, out of which we are only going to concentrate on 1, being Thailand … aaand that was all for Geography; painless right?

Great. So now it is time for some of History. We are now going to be talking about the history of the BL genre and the Queer art genre within two particular cultures; Eastern and Western.

BL, otherwise known as Boy’s Love, is a genre that was born in Japan in the 1970s. To properly discuss the world of BL it would take way too many blogs, so I’m afraid I won’t delve too deep into it, but in order to proceed with our discourse I need for everyone to at least understand the substantial difference between, for example, a series like The Eight Sense and Heartstopper. The first is a BL and the other is a Queer Coming-of-Age Drama. These two series are the I most point out very positive outcome of a lot of struggle and progress within both the BL and Queer art genre through the years.

The East and BLs - BL was created by women to be consumed by other women in Japan. It had nothing to do with creating content for gay/queer people, and this is very fundamental for everyone to understand. The thing is that it doesn’t matter where in the world you are, if you are or were a girl/woman you know the struggles are real. Different parts of the world deal with this frustration in different ways, and Japan and eventually the other 4 Asian countries I listed above found this to be one of them. The BL genre is basically having two men in a forbidden relationship, driven by mad passion, and who would always choose each other over the rest of the world. Star crossed-lovers where one of them would always be the Seme/Top or male-male and the other the Uke/Bottom or female-male. At the core of it all, BL was intended to be escapism, which eventually turned into fetishism and now can be all the above and something else entirely; evolution aye?

Mainly Asian women perhaps used BL to feel like their opinions and emotions could matter, in an environment where like also many other countries in Africa men are the ones that have the last say, or just any say at all. So they fulfilled their fantasy of being heard, and having power, while at the same time having the “strongest/most ideal” of men fall desperately in love with this male version of themselves. It is obviously much more complex than my two line sentence explanation, but for now, kindly keep this image in your mind.

Moving on!

The West and Queer Art - The queer genre in the West for the longest time was almost always a guaranteed tragedy. Interestingly enough, even though the first movie that mentioned homosexuality was in the 1960, the beginning of Queer culture in movies was, also for the West, in the 1970s. I can’t tell you the amount of books and films I have read and seen in my day says the woman in her thirties LOL and, despite the heart-wrenching looming tragedy, I would still enjoy finding comfort during those few chapters/scenes when the couple/pairing was happy, even though I knew for a fact that either one of them or both would die, or be eternally separated, or some other kind of tragedy.

The funny thing is that I would just accept it, because why not? Is not like my reality showed any different. It wasn’t like I was aware of happy and successful queer people around me, so why would I expect to read or watch anything else? Also I am a nasty ass angsty person so really I have no excuse. 

… are y’all following me thus far?

Now, let’s take a bit of a leap into the 2000s where money-makers finally clocked in on the fact that there is mad-money that can be made with BL in the East and Queerness in the West. In the East we start adopting fanservice within boybands and Asian-Dramas, we start printing thousands of BL mangas, and producing as many animes to match. In the West we keep having the token queer comedian appear on every show as well as making movies of historic queer figures who have impacted the world somehow, so that the queers can feel represented, even though all the actors are for the most part straight, because at this point in time, even though we acknowledge that Queer people exist, coming out is still very meh.

As the 2000s progress and we enter the 2010s thanks to actual progress within some western countries, the interweb and social media it becomes increasingly easier for an Eastern Fujoshi/Fudanshi/Fujin (Bl lover girl/boy/enby) to find themselves in say the UK, which has areas that breathe queerness and queer history and for a Western Queer to find themselves in say Japan where they can easily buy a manga about “queers” in happy relationship or, somewhere in South Korea, can easily see two very attractive boys/girls from a random kpop band openly kiss.

And then, in the midst of this “cultural” exchange, and awakening, something happens.

The Eastern Fujoshi/Fudanshi/Fujin realise that there are actual real queer people in the world sounds stupid, but believe me, it is not. That queer people are not just characters in a book, or anime, and that in fact there really are people in the world who are for example of the same sex and truly wanna be together and, if gay, for example, can also be both very masculine and still want to be together. At the same time the Western Queer realise that they actually can be happy, and that they deserves a happy ending, because some of this BLs aren’t half as bad and they sometimes make valid points and then you find out that actual queer people are now also writing BLs so things start to make some sense. 

As I mentioned, society was also changing, Queer people in the West started gaining a few rights, such as being able to get married in America and some European countries, and as a consequence, in the following decade, we now have series and movies that have Queer protagonist, with happy endings to boot! In the East, things are either not moving at all or moving a bit differently, or kinda slowly, but still it is movement. Within the countries that are moving differently, talking about Queerness is still heavy but has finally become something that they “don’t mind” just talking about and the gay neighbour is actually seen as the gay neighbour, whether they will talk to them is debatable, but at least they are recognised as such and not absurdly explained away or their existence ignored.

Now back to geography. The reason why I mentioned those 5 countries (China, Japan, South Korea, Taiwan and Thailand) is because at some point in the 2010s they were the main producers, and consumers, of BL within the Asian continent, and yes, while still being hella homophobic and, but let’s be real for a second, queer people have been around since the beginning of time, so even though BL was made and intended for women, our Queer Eastern Siblings would find a way to secretly also consume BL, being the closest thing to reading about a queer relationship, so added to the westerner consumption as well, it is no surprise that these 5 countries suddenly had a boom, despite having been being homophobic. 

Hence, it can be said that these 5 countries were on the same wavelength in the early 2010s, but what about now? With the considerable change in behaviour and thought with regards to Queer people in these countries in the early 2020s where do these 5 countries stand with regards to their Queer people and politics? Well, China has now banned BLs entirely, and I will not delve into their further lack of queer rights. Taiwan and Thailand have legalised Queer marriage. Then there is Japan which is making progress towards trying to legalise Queer marriage with to my greatest joy a successful ruling that happened this year in March related to same-sex unions … so, what about South Korea?

Well … SK is so close 🥹 … Yet so far 😫

It’s like they are taking 4 steps forward and 3 steps backwards, constantly. They are well far from China-levels which is a fucking relief I tell you! but they are dragging their feet to be at Japan-levels (and Japan is very close to Thailand and Taiwan Queer status currently). Yet, it is not as negative as it seems, or as some people try to portray it. You look around social media and they depict SK as if it were China. SK is currently facing a situation where it notices that things are changing and change is scary y’all. Resistance is the usual reaction to change, and the older generations, mainly those led by the Christian groups are not really where is at. SK’s youth and older liberal generations hold the answer to the Queer Korea questions.

So what exactly makes SK look hopeful? Well, time to get back to some History again 😘

The first Queer organisation in SK was formed in 1993 by 3 gay men and 3 lesbian women. The following year the 6 separated into 2 groups and formed the first gay organisation and the first lesbian one respectively. In 1997 we have the first demonstration for gay and lesbian rights, which then lead into 2000, the year of the first Pride Parade, which is one of the events of the very first Seol Queer Culture Festival Daegu Queer Culture Festival will be created in 2009, do keep this in mind … but another major event happened in the year 2000.

Y’all know that saying X walked so that Y could run? Well Hong Seok Cheon was basically forced to walk so that Queer Korean could learn how to properly train to run.

Though Seok-cheon is presently back to being somewhat popular again, his coming out was pretty traumatic. His career as comedian/actor started in 1994 and he was quite popular which landed him a good number of acting roles, and a lot of placements in comedy shows, as well as a kids show. In 2000 he was asked about his sexuality and he had no qualms in replying that he was gay. The show editors decided to cut out that part but a journalist gotta love them 🙃 got a hold of the footage and forced him to “elaborate”. Upon confirming, Seok-cheon lost all his jobs and was shunned verbally abused, discrimination and the lot, oh yes … by his own country. 

Not surprisingly, given that nobody in his own country wanted to interact with him, he at first thought of moving to the US to start afresh, but then decided against it. Seok-cheon decided to stay and prove to everyone in his country that he could make it and be successful again. And that he did. In 2002 he opened the first of what now is a high end chain of 9 restaurants in Itaewon. 2004 he joined the Democratic Labor Party and was selected by Time magazine as the Asian Hero of that year and in the following years Seok-cheon will keep racking up achievements  🎶🎵Did you see my bag? Did you see my bag? 🎶🎵 Namean?! (I’m not gonna list them all but you should definitely look him up and learn a bit about him, if you are interested).

But how does that connect to today? In 2008 he started his own talk show Coming Out and though there was a bit of resistance at the beginning as expected, the youth came in force and he started gaining audiences and boom! He was back on TV and slowly he’d get also a few cameos on prominent media, such as the Netflix drama Itaewon Class. Now let’s leave the lime-light for a second and let's look at the military 😬. It is vitally important that people understand that being gay is not illegal in any of the 5 countries we’ve been talking about yes, even China, but the public opinion and beliefs of each country greatly influence how their queer communities are thought of and treated.

Now, SK Military has become pretty infamous within the queer community for conducting witch-hunts in order to find out and humiliate gay soldiers, so much so that organisations such as Amnesty eventually had to step in. That being said, let's be real real real for a second. Though it is appalling what they have done to the queer soldiers, the SK military was also very famous for hazing, assaulting, causing cadets regardless of sexuality to want to unalive themselves and what more. All of the aforementioned, which put SK’s military on the map in a not so positive light globally, added to the increase in suicides, made the government address the situation, and they eventually came up with solutions such as the buddy system, which was first implemented in 2003. But, back to the gays. The most popular witch-hunt happened in 2017 where two soldiers amongst others were outed, but these particular two were found guilty of having sex off-base, during off hours.

In 2022 this conviction was overturned, the soldiers were no longer guilty and it is now no longer illegal, for queer soldiers, to have sex off-base during off-hours. You know what else happened in 2022? SK aired their first Queer reality shows, one being To Me(a)rry Queer and and the other being His Man. In 2023, His Man 2 will give us our first successful real-life queer couple, who are our beloved couple Junseong and Seongho (together known as Junseongho). They are the first queer couple to ever appear on Dazed magazine and we are all familiar with Dazed, it is not the front page like our boys get, but we all know how big of a deal this is, right?

You know what else happened in 2023? Remember that Daegu Queer Culture Festival I was talking about? The Mayor of Daegu (big Christian sympathiser) tried to stop this festival which includes the Parade and many other events, even though the Court ruled it was okay for the Festival to be carried out. The Mayor gathered other supporters and pulled up to the group, but the Daegu Police protected the Festival and removed the mayor and his “friends” from the premises. This was big and made news worldwide. 

In fact, Daegu’s Queer Culture Festival is the second largest one in the country, after Seoul’s. This is mainly possible because the Local Authorities (such as the police) are quite independent in belief from their present Mayor and the Christian factions. In contrast, for example, Busan’s Queer Culture Festival had a two year run but was then cancelled in 2019. Unfortunately, in Busan, The Mayor, the Local Authorities and the Christian factions are buddy-buddies making it much harder to get protection and permissions, aaaaaand things like that, kids, is why it is super important to vote for your local administration as well.

Even though these are all very important stepping stones, SK is nowhere close to being the UK, obviously. The LGBTQ community still has to get all their core rights being legalised, and queer people can still be subject to random ass attacks, such as the singer Holland had in 2022, which, by the way, also still occasionally does happen in the UK and everywhere else in the Queer World. Which is a general minority reality I’m afraid.

Furthermore, it is still illegal to have sex on base, which the country maintains that they are upholding because they are trying to prevent possible sexual assaults not too mad about this tbh, which is a valid concern, but most importantly they now know that the world is watching and why is that important? Because, for example, even though they are now separated, one of the boys from the Me(a)rry Queer couples enlisted around the same time with JK & JM and from his posts and photo-booth pictures that other soldiers posted of him, he seems to be making friends and to be comfy as comfy as you can get while serving, kinda like Joonie and most likely JM & JK

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A post shared by 박보성 (@park_bosung)

Not quite the attitude of someone fearing a witch-hunt, right? But then again, there isn’t much to hunt when you are already out, it is afterall illegal to hunt people and the world is now aware; is there? …

Now back to the general people of SK. According to a survey conducted in 2023 last year, 56% of South Koreans still oppose same-sex marriage (in comparison with only 26% of Japanese). 56% is not bad but then 72% don’t want queer people in their neighbourhoods and  workplace, though 81% think that it is not right to terminate people because of their sexual orientation 4 steps ➡️3 steps ⬅️… … … Basically it’s okay to be queer here as in SK, but not here-here, perhaps over there like a queer only neighbourhood or something which at the moment is the Itaewon district. 

So yes, 2024 Queer SK is still struggling though they are not going to be overtly nasty about it, because the world is watching. I mean, don’t get me wrong, progress is progress and we love to see that, it is actually amazing, but there still needs to be a general environment where LGBTQ rights in SK need to be recognised and for queer Koreans to not be discriminated against in their social/work/family life. It is also great that Queer media is trying to transition more and more from only BL to actual Queer Drama, for example I am really looking forward to watching Love In The Big City which btw also stars Kim Go Eun.

There is still work to be done, but I think Jung Cueri, a lesbian woman who helps with the Seoul Queer Culture Festival, says it best (here is the full article https://www.dw.com/en/why-are-south-koreans-less-welcoming-of-lgbtq-neighbors/a-68698268 ):

“I think the attitudes of younger generations of Koreans are getting better," she said, pointing out that young LGBTQ+ individuals "tend to come out sooner to their families, in their workplaces and schools than my generation because they are more aware of their sexuality through social media and exposure to various discussions that are more tolerant of LGBTQ+ people." And the cultural festival can help to be a catalyst to change further, she believes. "It will get better," she said. "And that is why the organizers and everyone else involved in the festival are working so hard; they know that Korean society will get better, and they want to contribute to that.

From where I stand it seems Hopeful, Queerful, if you may.

So, Fighting!, Queer South Korea!

Always respectfully yours,

Marengo. 

[miss0atae]

Random Thoughts about Love Sick 2024 (EP 6): Misunderstandings and Teenagers' expectations of love.

Today, we got the beach episode you expect from any Thai BL . In between we also saw how other characters are coping with the difficulties and fun time you can get during teen-hood. The episodes are quite long so you get to see many things, but I feel it wouldn't work any other way because there is a very large cast for this series. It's the only way to give enough screen-time to everyone (I'll be more than ready for Perfect 10 Liners this way).

This episode wasn't really centered around Phun and Noh even if they got several scenes together. What I mean is that nothing really changed for them in this episode. They are still stuck in the same stage where they both admit they care for the other one, but they can't do anything about that. Phun is still with Aim because he also care for her and he still gets jealous when he see Noh interacting with other people who he know could flirt with him (Yuri or Earn). Noh is also experimenting jealousy because he saw Aim admitting her feelings for someone else and he doesn't know what it could change for her relationship with Phun. It will get messy I think, but I hope in the end they will learn what they really want.

Talking about Aim, I felt quite sad for her in this episode. She crafted this trip at the beach to be able to see Li/Lee, but nothing changed. She told her again that she likes her, but something happened in the past and we don't have enough information. Li/Lee isn't with Aim and Aim is still hurt by this fact. I hope they will get to really talk in the coming episode (ending up together at the end of the series would be great too). She is also pressured by her mom to keep doing her influencer's job and she doesn't seem to find a real joy of doing this. The series shows also how some people feel free to voice their negative/unwanted opinion of influencers out loud and doesn't really respect them as human being. Aim is quite young and we know this type of fame can be damaging. She must also be struggling with her identity/orientation.

Even if the series is mostly showing queer relationship, I liked how they also decided to tackle on the pressure women can have in heterosexual relationship. I think it was interesting to see how Yuri felt like she had to "do it" with Noh. It also showed how men can be as lost as women in this type of situation. I don't know enough about this to really talk about it properly. I would say the series tried to show bias around gender role and how hurtful it can be.

I also want to add that Noh saw Aim and Li/Lee's conversation and he filmed it. I wish he didn't do it. It never ends well. I think he will probably talk about that with Grace because he is lost and he needs someone to help him understand. Obviously he can't really talk about it with Phun. In addition, he may not feel like talking to Ohm because it would need for him to explain his complicated relationship with Phun. I just hope he won't do something stupid like post the video online. It doesn't look like something he would do, but we never know. I still want to trust him because I really appreciate him as a character. However, no human is perfect. He wouldn't be an interesting character if he didn't have weakness.

Of course, we also get to see more about Ohm and Mick. I wonder why Ohm is so harsh to Mick. He is supposed to be his mentor, but I feel like he doesn't exactly know how he should act. I agree that "you should know yourself the best", but it seems a bit laughable that a teenager would say that and doesn't give room for "learning". Even adults don't know who they really are and it takes more time for some people to really discover it. He was acting like if Mick can't run and fail at doing this simple task, he would fail in every other situations in his life. I doubt Ohm knows himself so well. He is still young and things in life will probably impact his views and change them. Maybe he is just faking it like we all do and it's just teenager's bravado.

I also already talked about how I felt like Per and Mawin had a weird relationship dynamic. In the previous episode, it was like they were already together, but couldn't be out, but now it seems like Per is doing something for Mawin's family and he must not "go soft" on him. My guess is that Mawin's family knows he has feelings for men and mostly for Per, but they don't accept it. I don't know what they expect from Per, but I think it's a little too much to ask a teenager to do anything about it. In the previous episode they were really cute to each other and this time Per rejected Mawin and asked him to go home. I hope the next episodes will give us more clues about what is going on.

Finally, we have Phong/Pong and Ngor. I don't know why, but I really like them. They have the least screen time among all the other characters, but there is something compelling about their story. I can't wait to see more of them.

Finally, at the end of the episode, Earn is here again. He wasn't at the beach so we didn't see him a lot, but now we're back at the school and Earn is still set on flirting with Noh and winning his heart. It also probably mean we'll see more of Pete too.

I already can't wait for next episode!

[nieded]

I knew nothing about F1 until I read Sit Tight, Take Hold this year. Now I’m sad that Daniel Ricciaddo is retiring, and I’m dying to talk about it with F1 fans I know in real life. But I can’t because I don’t know how to explain that I like Daniel primarily because he was the teammate of a fictional driver in a gay fanfic based on a TV show they’ve probably never heard of like WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN

hello!

i'm honestly unwell about danny right now. i waited a bit to respond to this ask because i have been really struggling this weekend.

danny hasn't been performing up to par lately, but the way everything has been handled is so absurd and crazy. two months ago, people were talking about him being guaranteed that red bull seat. then suddenly it was 'liam lawson to replace him in 2025,' and within a week it turned into, 'he's fired after singapore.'

nobody actually knows if he's done or not. it may be likely, but rbr refuse to confirm or deny, just saying they have to look at their options. and we don't know actually know if anyone has told danny anything, but he basically found out from journalists that it was going to be his 'last weekend.'

so, there was no official goodbye. and zak brown is being shitty about him taking fastest lap (danny now holds the fastest lap record at singapore, btw. in a vcarb. how's that for getting fired?), and i have spent a good chunk of the weekend crying.

i love this sport in some ways, but there's a lot to hate or dislike. anytime i see someone say they now subscribe to f1tv because of #rr, i cringe because the governing body of the fia and liberty media does not deserve your money. #rr is the way it is because there's a lot i hate about reality, and i wanted to make it better, even if it was just fiction.

danny has been an ambassador for f1, and he's largely the reason why f1 has so many new fans over the years. with 257 races under his belt, he is now in the top ten of f1 drivers with the most race starts. he's won eight grand prixs when many drivers hope to win even just one. his decision-making has been questionable when it comes to career moves, but he has always been one of the most respected and respectful drivers on the grid. if this is the end, then i hope he takes some time off to heal, and then he can go on and do other great things. race elsewhere or focus more on his vineyard or start a farm or sleep in until noon. whatever the fuck he wants.

personally, i would like danny to come do indycar in the states because then i could actually afford to watch him race, but even this weekend he said that indy still scares him.

but i think we should be paying attention to how this is being handled because danny is in the crossfire, but he's not the real problem. the pr nightmare that is this dumpster fire of a weekend is symptomatic of a greater collapse at red bull. they have lost several key team members (another one was announced today) admist a power struggle within the organization, and it could very well be that no one knows if danny is staying or not publically because nobody knows internally either. even vcarb's team principal does not know, which is why they did a big send off for him post-race just in case.

rbr just lost the lead on the constructors championship and max might very well lose the drivers championship. christian horner was caught in a sex scandal, and their junior driver director spouts off horrifically racist shit all day long and loves to shit stir. helmut marko is probably the reason why yuki is not getting promoted to red bull racing despite outscoring danny this season and being on the junior team for four seasons, yet marko also will not release yuki from his contract. last year, yuki tried to find another seat for 2024 and rb blocked it. and with all the other bullshit about censorship this year and poor performance of red bull's car, max is even talking about retiring.

it's a mess right now and dr3 is a teeny tiny piece of this. this mismanagement of danny's retirement is just the biggest red flag we've seen all season (which is incredible because there have been so many red flags).

so yeah.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

reading update: March 2024

March was so !!!!!! so fucking long, but that means that I got to read a lot of books - more than I did in January or February. they're pretty all over the place in terms of quality, but I think they're also all going to be pretty memorable in one way or another. shall we discuss?

what have I been reading?

The Ballad of Perilous Graves (Alex Jennings, 2022) - I bought this novel at Crescent City Books in New Orleans last June, then tucked it away to wait for exactly the right moment. and I'm so glad I did, because it was a gorgeous little flash of NOLA in the middle of a gray midwestern winter funk. this novel is so, SO steeped in celebrating the art, history, and culture of New Orleans, creating a version of the city filled with talking animals, living songs, and moving graffiti that hardly even feels that different than the real New Orleans. and in this book, Nola is distinct from New Orleans; there's some interesting multiverse stuff going on in the city that might be really interesting to my fellow fans of Dimension 20's Unsleeping City and N.K. Jemisin's City We Became. not every part of the book totally worked for me: the parts of the books following the kids - the titular Perilous "Perry" Graves and company - are definitely the strongest, and the actual details of how the plot got resolved got a little muddled for me before the surprisingly abrupt end. but! it must be said that the vibes are immaculate, and vibes will get you really far with me. I want to see a thousand more stories set in this world.

Thank You For Sharing (Rachel Runya Katz, 2023) - with god as my witness this was one of the most boring romance novels I've ever read, and that's saying something considering I literally just read Red String Theory. what I really adore are romances that take place at around an 11 on a scale of 1-10, under circumstances where absolutely no normal person should even be able to contemplate fucking but our protagonists power through because they're horny to a degree that renders them clinically unwell. this book was hovering somewhere around a 2; it's literally just two adults having jobs and hanging out in pretty mundane circumstances. the only thing that really strains my belief is that an otherwise well-adjusted woman is still upset about something that happened at summer camp over a decade ago, but I guess if she wasn't mad about something then the protagonists wouldn't be able to have a conversation about their feelings to show off how good they are at therapy speak.

Africa Is Not a Country: Notes on a Bright Continent (Dipo Faloyin, 2022) - genuinely one of the most excellent pieces of nonfiction that I've read in a hot minute. Faloyin's book consists of interconnected essays that just dazzlingly brilliant, in turns solemn, sardonic, and sly, always ready to offer the audience a little wink as it subverts expectations. Faloyin walks the reader through the history of several African countries, from colonial looting to rocky political regimes to the common tropes that plague modern media with depictions of Africa as universally backwards, impoverished, and struggling. I really felt like I was *learning* while I was reading this book and learning the specifics of so many places that are often portrayed as interchangeable in American media. I really sincerely can't recommend this enough, it's an excellent read.

That Time I Got Drunk and Saved a Demon (Kimberly Lemming, 2024) - I can't in good conscience say that I enjoyed this book, but it is kind of a great read if you enjoy updating your housemates on the latest bullshit in your horny fantasy romance. Lemming's in a weird middle ground where she's putting a lot of effort into the backstory of the world that justifies our protagonist (who's named CINNAMON HOTPEPPER!!!!) meeting and hooking up with a demon (who's also a dragon, because all monsters are just a subspecies of demon. I'm not crazy about that but the worst part by far is definitely that his dragon form has hair) but also stops giving a shit about it the second it's not necessary. like (spoilers) but all of the human characters are REALLY chill about finding out that the goddess they've been worshipping for CENTURIES is actually an evil lich? and there's another human character who pretty casually watches the city where she's spent her entire life get razed to the ground by monsters with absolutely zero remorse, which is genuinely bananas. also this book misses SOOOO many opportunities to be really nasty horny because it's so focused on hyping up Cinnamon and Fallon's all-consuming five day spiral into unhinged magical demon marriage. even the "light bondage" promised in the content warning was disappointing; the emphasis was definitely more on the "light" than the "bondage." what does a bitch have to do to find a decent monsterfucker book. for the love of god please.

It Came From the Closet: Queer Reflections on Horror (ed. Joe Vallese, 2022) - I've heard a lot of hype about this book, an anthology of queer writers musing about the queerness that draws them to the horror genre. I was expecting the essays to be of an analytical nature, but it turns out they're much more personal. that's not necessarily a bad thing, but some of these essays ended up falling SUPER flat for me, with weak analogies that felt like the result of authors remembering at the last second that they were supposed to be relating their life to a horror movie somehow. which isn't to say that there weren't high points as well, but overall the collection was low lows and medium highs for me.

Sex Criminals Volume One: One Weird Trick (Matt Fraction and Chip Zdarsky, 2014) - I'm trying so hard to remember to read comics that aren't 30 year old Batman stories, and my friend Emily lent this to me months ago when I helped them move, so it seemed like high time to get around to checking out Sex Criminals. the premise is fun! what if time stopped when you had an orgasm? then what if you met someone else with the same ability and the two of you could have sex and run around in a time-stopped world together? and then what if you robbed banks? and I'm a huge fan of that. the writing isn't the most gripping thing in the world, and now that it's a decade old I find that it feels very emblematic of the kind of aggressively offbeat, Whedon-ish writing style that felt like it was really unavoidable in the 2010s, which I can't say has aged MAGNIFICENTLY for me. but I'm willing to read more, see where this series goes, and give it the chance to really win me over. stay tuned for Volume Two!

Rental Person Who Does Nothing (Shoji Morimoto, trans. Don Knotting 2023) - I can't decide if I want to sit Morimoto down for dinner to pick his brain or just skip the niceties and put his brain in a jar to study it, but either way this guy definitely has something fascinating going on. tl;dr: in this memoir Morimoto recounts his experiences using Twitter to let other people hire him out as a person who will do nothing. "doing nothing" covers all kinds of things: accompanying people to eat a meal that they felt too self-conscious to eat alone, keeping someone company so they don't get distracted while they should be working, or waving goodbye to a stranger at a train station. he's not paid for this, either, or at least doesn't charge a fixed rate; all the Morimoto asks for is the price of his train ticket to meet clients, who sometimes buy him extra gifts as a thank you. there are so many FASCINATING ideas presented in this book about work and value and interpersonal connection, and yet the book clocks in at under 200 pages. Morimoto isn't here to tell you how to feel about anything he's done, only to present some experiences and let you unravel the meaning for yourself. and I guess that's sort of brilliant. throughout the memoir he's adamant that Rental Person doesn't offer advice or tell anyone what to do, offering only basic responses when prompted. telling someone else what to think or attempting to offer up any wisdom gleaned from his rental work would count as doing something, wouldn't it? I really recommend checking it out for yourself and deciding what you think, especially if you're in a slump seeking something quick, engaging, and easy to read.

[suzannahnatters]

My 2024 In Books!

After struggling with my reading in 2023, this year I slightly exceeded my 2-books-a-week reading goal, with a total of 106 for the year. I also had a lot more fun with my reading - narrowing down my year-end best-of to just 10 fiction and 5 non-fiction was extremely tough, so apologies to all the wonderful books that didn't make the cut. Without further ado...

TOP 10 FICTION WHAT MONSTROUS GODS by Rosamund Hodge (re-read) I featured an earlier draft of this book on a previous best-of list, but the finished version published this year and I love it even more now if possible. This lush, romantic YA fantasy is a story of sticking stubbornly by your faith, refusing to abandon it even as you disentangle the lies, half-truths, and old wounds that have become a part of it. Spectacular.

CITY OF SERPENTS by Christina Baehr (re-read) I still actually haven't read the final published draft of this book but the second draft made me yell with delight. This entire series has been perfect but this book, with its themes of faith versus fear, the meek inheriting the earth, and its banter, mad science, and suffragism, may be my favourite.

THE AMULET OF SAMARKAND by Jonathan Stroud I Can't Believe I Didn't Write This Myself, it's so precisely my thing. Not just an action-packed thrill ride: this story of a magician's apprentice stealing a powerful djinn for revenge has solid characterisation and gloriously unsparing themes about power and privilege.

BABETTE'S FEAST by Isaak Dinesen (Karen Blixen) I was familiar with the classic film, but the original short story is even richer and more profound. Blixen's theme has to do with how faith is enriched by the experience of art and pleasure, as a small sect of Lutheran ascetics are given an artistic experience of God's grace that then flows from them, enabling them to extend that grace to others out of joy rather than duty.

THE BANDIT QUEENS by Parini Shroff This black comedy about a widow in rural India being blackmailed by the other women in her village into helping them become widows, too, deserves a lot of content warnings for domestic violence, SA, trauma, and language. Yet it's both hilariously funny and surprisingly nuanced.

LONG LIVE EVIL by Sarah Rees Brennan A young woman with terminal cancer gets sucked into the world of her favourite fantasy series and proceeds to break fourth walls, examine fantasy tropes, and have a rip-roaring fantasy adventure while revelling in perfectly purple prose. Along the way it discusses what it really means to be a villain and why we let our main characters get away with murder. I am already pining for the sequel.

THE SILMARILLION by JRR Tolkien (re-read) How to cope with the post-RINGS OF POWER hangover? Group SILMARILLION re-read! This is quite simply one of the most beautiful, moving, good, and true books I have ever read or ever will read. I am consumed with regret that, as deeply as it has influenced me, I will never hope to equal it.

THE HOBBIT by JRR Tolkien (re-read) Still great, and imbued (to a greater extent than I ever noticed before) with Tolkien's perennial themes of artistry and sub-creation.

EMPIRE OF SHADOWS by Jacquelyn Benson Imagine a swashbuckling archaeology adventure like Indiana Jones or THE MUMMY, except with a formidable amount of real Meso-American history and a romantic male lead you don't want to punch in the eye, and you'd have this book. And then the resolution hits, and it's numinous and cathartic and lifts the whole book to a new level. Delightful!

ELLA ENCHANTED by Gail Carson Levine I missed reading this book till now, but I'm not sorry because now I can appreciate it properly. This book isn't just an delightful fantasy adventure with a wonderfully convincing romance - it also has profound themes about obedience and conscience and maturity. Light years better than the movie, and wholeheartedly recommended to readers of any age.

HONOURABLE MENTIONS Because I read so many more than just ten excellent novels this year, I want to THOROUGHLY recommend the following: THE SAVAGE DAMSEL AND THE DWARF by Gerald Morris THE PRISONER'S THRONE by Holly Black A CRANE AMONG WOLVES by June Hur THE HEDGE WITCH OF FOXHALL by Anna Bright THE NECROMANCER'S APPRENTICE by Beverley Twomey SPLINTERED MIND by WR Gingell

- TOP 5 NON-FICTION I didn't read so many non-fiction books this year, owing to spending much of the year plowing through one audiobook that I didn't really love. But the ones I did read were great, and these are my top picks:

WOMEN AND THE GENDER OF GOD by Amy Peeler This short but meaty theology book focuses on what the Incarnation can tell us about the way God values women and also about the gendered ways in which God makes himself known to humanity, despite being far beyond any human conception of gender. It managed to be both orthodox and mind-blowing.

SHAKESPEARE: THE MAN WHO PAYS THE RENT by Judi Dench I inhaled this book inside 48 hours: a legendary Shakespearean actress records the lessons (and anecdotes) of a lifetime spent playing 28 different roles across 20 different plays by one of the world's greatest authors. I learned so much about Shakespeare, acting, and the dramatic art from this book.

THE LOST HISTORY OF CHRISTIANITY by Philip Jenkins For centuries, during the early and high middle ages, a vast, now-vanished church flourished across the entire Asian continent as well as the northeastern parts of Africa. This lost history has much to teach us about how the Church can grow, flourish, and remain faithful as a cultural minority - contrary to the demands of many loud voices within western Christianity today.

TO BE A MACHINE by Mark O'Connell Subtitled "Adventures Among Cyborgs, Utopians, Hackers, and the Futurists Solving the Modest Problem of Death". The transhumanist movement has fundamentally the same life goals as Ar-Pharazon the Golden, final king of doomed Numenor, and O'Connell tackles his subject with the outrageous wit it demands, so I had the time of my life.

THE SEXUAL REFORMATION by Aimee Byrd A study of what the Song of Songs has to tell us, not just about the sexes, but also about God's love for his church. So rich that I'll be re-reading it periodically in the future just to grasp all its implications - but it's already had a profound impact on me.

HONOURABLE MENTION THE GOLDEN MOLE by Katherine Rundell - a delightful collection of bite-sized essays about the wonder of the natural world, gorgeously written if somewhat (and understandably) doom-laden.

[yoshihashismattebum]

Favourite Albums of 2024

Spotify Wrapped was fun and all, but I have one problem with it: it only focuses on individual songs! (Okay, that's not strictly true – I have many other problems with it as well. E.g. 'why is this playlist full of songs I've never listened to' and 'wtf is this AI podcast bullshit') Anyway, one of my goals for 2024 was to listen to more whole albums and I think I generally succeeded! I didn't listen to a ton, but more than previous years for sure.

So I thought it would be fun to pick and share my top 3 albums of the year! Here they are, in ascending order!

3) Yard Act - Where's My Utopia?

Post-punk jams that dig into the contradictions that come with fame as a punk band. Self-deprecating and unapologetic in equal measure, with lyrics that tread the line between 'smart' and 'smart-arse'. Oh you can dance to it too.

Highlights: We Make Hits, Dream Job,

2) St. Vincent – All Born Screaming

I'm not sure what genre this falls into. Rock? Alt-pop? Wikipedia reckons 'art rock', so let's go with that. Whatever you want to call it, it's a masterpiece of songwriting. It spans so many different genres and so many different themes: fame, identity, religion, grief. It's achingly raw and personal, but a lot of it is all too relatable. There's also another version entirely in Spanish, which is very cool!

Highlights: Reckless, Broken Man, Big Time Nothing

1) Allie X – Girl With No Face

Before this album, I'd always liked one song by Allie X (All The Rage) but could never get into anything else she'd done. Well, with the release of this album I'm pleased to say that that's no longer true. I honestly struggled to pick just 3 highlights because it's so packed with catchy alt-pop bangers. The lyrics are right up Tumblr's street too, with meditations on chronic illness, identity, gender, body dysmorphia, and one song that's all about getting top surgery. Truly exceptional imo.

Highlights: Black Eye, Off With Her Tits, Weird World

Honourable Mentions:

Sløtface – Film Buff

Sløtface are probably my favourite band of all time. Their live show this year was the best gig I've been to, let alone my favourite gig of 2024. So it's a shame that this album didn't quite crack the top three for me. Musically, it's the same joyous pop punk that I absolutely adore, but the lyrics didn't quite hit for me in the same way as their previous two albums. Still well worth a listen though!

Highlights: Quiet on Set, I Used To Be A Real Piece Of Shit, Final Gørl

Teen Mortgage – Teen Mortgage

I'm not entirely sure that this one qualifies as an album tbh, which is why I've excluded it from the top 3. Spotify has it down as a "compilation", so I think it's just a collection of their singles so far? Anyway, it kicks ass. It's the essence of punk: fast, loud and uncomplicated. Sometimes you don't need clever lyrics or subtle wordplay: you need 90 seconds of furious drumming, barely intelligible vocals about calling in sick to work, and a growling guitar riff that makes you want to fight God. Pure catharsis.

Highlights: Sick Day, Falling Down, Doctor

And because this is Tumblr, let's turn it into a tag game! Reblog this with your favourite albums of the year if you like! And tag some people whose recs you want to see!

I'm sure @thepenultimaterolo @thewaythroughthewoods and @unpairedbracket would have some great choices! And I'd be interested in hearing from @sycamoretrees @caranoirs and @counting-ducks as well if you're up for it! No pressure for any of you of course (and certainly no need to write as much as I have lol). Just if you feel like it :)

[mariequitecontrary]

2024 TF Reverse Mini Bang Memories Part 2

Link to Part 1! I am sharing just a few of my favorite memories of the @tf-bigbang

Let's keep going!

DREAM TEAM 66

The moment I saw @spashahoney's sketch, Team 66 LAUNCHED to the top of my list. I am so lucky to have been matched up with her as my partner!! She is funny, creative, encouraging, and I loved when we fed off each other's energy! I am truly proud of what we created and sincerely hope we continue to work together in the future <3

It was very fun knowing I wanted to partner with her even when I wasn't allowed to say XD

We were a dream team from the start and I'm not afraid to brag about this fact.

We were so chaotic and I had so much fun bouncing around with her talking transformers and about her concept for our collab!

I was also so, so very wrong about how much I planned to write for this fic XD

Either way, we adored what we both had made!

It's also SO TERRIFYING to even think about someone watching you while you write a fic based off of their art XD

It was VERY FUN and I adore my artist <3

Do I completely blame her for my new Optimus/Rodimus obsession? YES.

#BOBACULT

I bought...so much more boba than I usually do because of these people XD Boba Bthursdays and Bubble Tea Fridays birthed an ongoing boba addiction in me that I'm not trying all that hard to fix XD

RP

Getting back into rping! Most importantly starting to rp transformers! I've always been a big fan of collaborative storytelling through roleplay, so am always DELIGHTED to find rp partners to play with <3

I had to pause because of vacations and the bang deadline, but I can't wait to get back into it!

500 Word Writer Awards

We were challenged to write 500 words for a secret prize and suddenly every last block I felt that was preventing me from starting to write DISAPPEARED. I wrote 632 words and suddenly felt like I could do this🙂

I'm very proud of this reward and am keeping it forever.

I'm Easily Baited with Prizes

That was the start of something I kinda knew but FULLY REALIZED over the past few months...that I am so, so, so easily motivated with prizes. It takes minimal effort on the prize giver's part. All it has to be is something you took the time to provide for me and say its mine and suddenly I DRIVEN to complete whatever task is set before me XD

It's pathetic really. But also here are my prizes look at them I worked so hard for them be proud of meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!

DO YOU LIKE THEM I WORKED SO HARD FOR THEM! *bright eyes and wags tail*

Friends <3

I made so many friends! Friends to brainstorm with, an ao3 moot, a friend I've entered into a blood pact with, friends I've written together with a sprinting bot, friends to rp with, friends to talk about space robots with and anything under the sun :) I cherish them all so so so much <3

The Great Cicada War

But my friends bullied me :( They witnessed me dealing with probably the most harrowing part of the year...cicada season.

Time of My Life

I hadn't had this much fun in an online community...in a while. The past four months contain precious memories and friendships made that I'll treasure forever.

To the mods, thank you so much for hosting such a fun event! You all put so much work into making this special for us and I couldn't be more grateful to have been a part of this.

To all my new friends, thank you for welcoming me into this space and making me feel like I'm a real part of this fandom! Thank you for being kind and encouraging me when I was down and struggling, and thank you for uplifting and cheering me on when I was proud and succeeding. May inspiration always come easily to you.

Thanks for all the memories! I'll see you soon :)