#2020 fanfic challenge

[owlsie-hoot]

“I’ve got you.” For a moment she simply breathed it the familiar scent, felt the warmth of his body against her shivering one, found comfort in his arms that he had wrapped tightly around her cold shoulders. “Thank God I found you.”

for @shortstak87 @acgasfanchallenge

[amymbona]

OMG PRIEST IN KNIVES OUT IS CERTAINLY GOOD, BUT VICAR MR. ELTON... 🧎🏻‍♀️🙏 I need to confess all my sins to him and beg for forgiveness, please, and what would it be without his silly smile 😃

MR. ELTON MY BELOVED 🛐🛐🛐🛐

The sheer obscenity of the whole situation, how basically nothing is allowed in the late 18th century, everyone is to be behaving properly and poor you are having all these thoughts. And, what makes it absolutely terrible, all these explicit ideas circle around the young, face-made-in-heaven vicar, the servant of God who's adapted by the whole town. You adore him as well, so deeply that when you pray each evening, you wish he was in your room and stroked your hair as you struggle to fall asleep.

Each Sunday, you sit in the front row of the picturesque little church, eagerly nodding and listening to the each word of the sermon. When he offers the annual time for confession, you linger behind, allowing everyone else to confess to their sins instead.

"Dear child," the way he adresses you has you weak in the knees - thank god you're kneeling right now - and you're really having issues staying calm at the moment. "What seems to be troubling you?"

You join your hands by your chest, bowing your head down to gaze at his feet, heart beating as you suddenly feel so small under the intensity of his warm gaze. "Forgive me for I have sinned, father."

Now calling him that feels incredibly odd to you, considering there is not that huge of an age gap between the two of you, plus the intensity of your mind consuming dreams is like a heavy weight on your back.

"How have you sinned, my child?"

The most vulgar of words are running through your mind, some of them made up as you've never been to speak in the lower class way, but at the moment, you seem unable to come up with a properly former sentence. You feel the pit of hell burning beneath your knees, the eyes of christ drilling a hole into the back of your head. This isn't anything close to the casuality of accidentally showing an ankle or refering to someone with the wrong title.

"I've been having thoughts, father. Odious, ill and mind consuming."

"What exact kind of thoughts?" Mr. Elton asks, the softness of his voice like a caress to your cheek. How are you supposed to say it?

You gulp, fingers still intertwined, nails digging into the soft flesh of your own hands. "Thoughts that are not appropriate for an unwed woman. That should never occur."

Mr. Elton has rarely been exposed to certain vulgar images of female mind, not many women having visited him to confess to such a matter. And for that reason, he is supposed to find it troubling, to find it so obscure that he shouldn't even allow you to speak on such a matter. But something in his mind that has been touched by the finger of a devil, the not so God devoted part that's secretly longing for the basic male need is tempted to converse on such a matter.

However, you are a good christian girl, your father is the mayor of Highbury and he'd be damned for allowing your mind to get swallowed by something so sinful. He has to offer help, the same way he does to all your neighbours and all the people that come to seek his guidance.

"Tell me what exactly is on your mind, child," he demands softly, his voice as steady as his stance.

You gulp, eyes closing in shame as your heartbeat speeds up. This is way worse than if you were to confess to a murder, but once you've taken a bite, you have to eat the whole cake. So you speak. And for the sake of you both, choose to leave out the name of the main star of your fantasies.

"I've been... Imagining- vividly imagining the sight of a bare body, a man's body. And mine as well. Together, close," your voice is so quiet and full of shame that at first, Mr. Elton can barely hear you. With a small hum, he beckons you to continue. "And touching as well, places that shouldn't be touched. Kissing and performing other acts. I have never engager in anything of this kind, father, I don't know where the thoughts are coming from."

He can see you trembling at his feet and the urge to reach in and wipe the small tear that's rolling down your cheek takes over him. His hand shoots out and Mr. Elton manage to stop himself barely in time, the tips of his fingers running over your hairline. You flinch and he almost gasps too, luckily managing to disguise it as drawing a cross on your forehead. "Poor child."

You nod shakily, your heart beating so loud that it fills your ears like a sound of a drum, the whole entirety of the church suddenly suffocating you tightly. Mr. Elton smirks as the sight, your desperation as bright as the sky. He takes very sick and twisted pleasure in this situation, almost wanting to make the best of it, because it's not every day that a good girl like yourself, prim and proper - almost brain washed -, confesses to having such dirty thoughts. Would it be a sin to let you swim in the lake without offering a branch to grasp onto for a big longer?

[emolo-m]

ACGAS Christmas Challenge 2024

Week 3: 16 to 22 December Theme: The greatest gift of all

My entry for Week 3. My chosen prompt: Handmade toys

@acgasfanchallenge

GIF by @owlsie-hoot​

[my-name-is-bunnyfoxy]

POV: You want to join an art challenge for August regarding TMNT but the person hosting it is someone who wrote a Mikey gets adopted by the Rise turtles and you also fear that you doing it would come off as you supporting the creator meaning you support their fanfic that doesn't give any respect to 2012 and makes Mikey look like a damn crybaby and also for some reason calls him Casper and not to mention this person supports Unfamiliar Familiar

[below-average-fangirl]

Chapters: 5/?

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Additional Tags: Lust, Love Confessions, Idiots in Love, Fluff and Smut, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Eventual Smut, Romance

Summary: For the Spring fever challenge - writing prompt, Mud.

[farmody-prompts]

✨poll time! ✨

[troped-fanfic-challenge]

TROPED: 2020!

Here is a list of all the TROPED Events in 2020! Click on the links below to go directly to the events’ posts, and find all the rules, asks, masterlists, and moodboards submitted during each event in the links below.

TROPED 2019 Events!

Check out all the previous events from the year before. You will find all the rules, asks, masterlists, and moodboards submitted during each event in the link above.

Chopped: Choose Your Own Adventure

In this version of TROPED, you make all the big decisions! What theme you want and what four tropes you choose are entirely up to you (though, you do have to choose off our list that we provide... sorry lol)! Choose a theme and four tropes from our list and write us the fic of your dreams!

Chopped Madness 1.0

Anonymous writers going head to head for the title of CHOPPED! CHAMPION!! Think March Madness, but with fanfic!!

Chopped Choice: Smut

Chopped Choice was such an awesome event, so we've come up with a few variations on the concept, and we'd like to start it off with Chopped: After the Kitchens Close, a Chopped Smut event!! This event is the same as Chopped Choice! You pick the theme, you pick the tropes, and write us the fic of your dreams, except, this time, make it smutty!!

Chopped 3.0

The Chopped Challenge will follow the same structure as the two previous rounds of Chopped, with three (3) qualifying rounds open to anyone and one (1) championship round. The first three rounds will each have a theme, and a ‘mystery basket’ of four (4) tropes pulled from our trope list!

Chopped: Choice Horror 1.0

The FIRST annual choose your own horror fic event! Spooky, scary, slasher fics, ghost stories, fall feels, you name it, we wanna see it!

TROPED: Holiday Trope Exchange 2.0

Welcome to our SECOND Chopped: Holiday Trope Exchange fic swap! If you're joining us for the first time this year, this is a double blind gift exchange for The 100 fandom where the recipient selects four tropes from our list, and their writer creates a fic with those four tropes fitting out holiday theme!

The TROPED Events Masterlist | All the Tropes!

You can find all the fics that have been written for past TROPED events in our Master AO3 Collection! And you can find all the definitions and guidelines for each event in our All the Tropes! post.

TROPED: FAQ + TROPED: Rules!

Since the rules for our challenges are all pretty much the same, we’ve created a rules masterpost! Any changes, additions, or event specific rules will be shared when the event occurs, and we will link the rules for all our events!

Check out our carrd for more social links and challenge info: https://troped.carrd.co/

[glitchlight]

actually to expand on that last post is there truly any more dire state of a genre than western traditional fantasy now.

the top end is dominated by genre tentpoles nobody likes anymore, all of which are stealing the same five ideas (four of them racist) from one another constantly. Amazon blew a billion dollars on a lotr show nobody watched -- WHILE ALSO making a wheel of time show for millions itself and ALSO nobody talks about it. Bioware's probably gonna be dead if DA4 flops; Bethesda might well be dead before even getting a chance to make TES6. DnD is even more of a cultural juggernaut than it ever has been even as everyone hates it more with each passing day. Hasbro needs a billion dollars man. Hasbro needs MONEY. And everywhere else we're stuck in the prequel timeloop of endless nostalgia recursion.

The base of the genre, long dominated by a litany of endless hacks and enthusiastic nobodies has been supplanted by a new generation of neophytes and the 2020s hack, cranking out interminable webnovels emulating anime and light novels or else hopping on new genre trends inspired by anime and light novels like isekai and/or litrpg. There's an entire subgenre that's just " boring Dungeon Keeper letsplays."

The most interesting thing to happen in western fantasy in years is the development of cozy fantasy, the least emotionally challenging genre experiment ever and one which is as creatively bankrupt as it is wildly successful. Just slap a found family sticker and a token queer romance on a small business in a fantasy world and you've got yourself a cozy fantasy. And when those writers truly try branching into fiction when they can't lean on cliche and fanfic formula they write something like rebecca thorn's This Gilded Abyss, a Bioshock rip off so poorly plotted the middle portion of the book becomes literally incoherent.

Genre's fucked man.

[tippenfunkaport]

As a little self-challenge, I decided it might be fun to illustrate every one of my fanfics. We're starting this off with a real deep cut, a fic posted all the way back in Aug 2020….

Bow White and the Seven Princesses

A Bedtime Story, as told by Sea Hawk

“Melog, Melog, on the wall…” Sea Hawk and Mermista are babysitting the children of Bright Moon and Sea Hawk tells them a special personalized version of the classic fairy tale featuring their parents in the starring roles.

Read on AO3 (Comedy, 2,421 words)

[roublardise]

Hello sapphicnatural cule!! after some vibe checking, I thought we ought to celebrate Femslash February together ✨

This time, I'm proposing an event centered around fanfics, in order to celebrate all that's been written so far.

Instead of settling on one common reading challenge, I suggest we each pick our own reading challenge. That way, we'll all have our own goal and reading list, depending on our individual tastes in fics and how much we'd like to step out of our comfort zone. To add more fun and some group activities, the event will kick off by sharing rec lists (≠ from the reading lists), and end up with taking inspiration from one (or more) of these fanfics to create!!

TLDR: #Sapphicnaturalreads is an event in three parts, taking place through the month of February:

week one - REC-ING

we post rec lists of femslash fics

writers are welcome to share their own works

we set up our own reading challenge & to-read list

weeks two & three - READING

WE READ!!

we live-read, we post quick reviews after finishing each fic, we discuss, we expand, we dig up old fanarts, ...

we don't forget to comment on ao3

week four - CREATING

we take inspiration from one (or more) fics we've read! you can go wherever your heart takes you:

make an edit about a fic you've read

draw a ship from a fic you've read

make an amv for a ship you've read

write a poem about a theme present in a fic you've read

write a one-shot about a fic you've discovered

...

I will try to rb everyone's lists and posts but can't assure I'll get them all. So please tag your posts with #SapphicnaturalReads so we can all find them and find each others! 💕

.

To help get started, here's some examples of challenges:

reading a fic a day

reading fics of a same pairing (a ship you've never read about / your favorite / ...)

reading fics with a tagged trope you like (sharing a bed / fake dating / enemies to lovers / ...)

reading ficlets of less than 1k

or longer fics, of more than 10k

reading fics from the so-called golden era (let's say, pre-2016)

or on the contrary, focusing on fics posted post-2020

only reading rarepairs

handpicking specific fics you've been wanting to read for a long time - their time is now!

...

You can find femslash fics in the different ao3 collections: Sapphicnatural - Sapphicnatural Rare Pairs - Sapphicnatural One Hit Wonders - Sapphicnatural Poly Ships - Sapphicnatural Solo Works

or in the #fic tag of @sapphicnaturalrights for some tumblr-onlies made during the Sapphicnatural Weeks

my asks & dms are opened for any question!

✨📚 SEE YOU SOON 📚✨

[copperbadge]

I was making breakfast and listening to an episode of Just King Things this morning, which is a podcast I do recommend -- two very smart English teachers are reading the books of Stephen King in publication order and discussing them. This could go extremely awry except they're both highly conscious of his failings as well as his skill, so they do really well handling a lot of his less salutatory content.

They've hit the point in King's ouvre (this episode was about Hearts In Atlantis) that follows his recovery from the car accident that very nearly killed him, where he was struck by a van while out walking. One of them pointed out that it seems as though he came back from nearly dying determined to write the wildest shit imaginable and only write what he wanted, which struck a chord in me this time despite having listened to this episode before. Perhaps because I was thinking about my own writing and where it's going in the short term (there are a couple of short stories I want to do that I don't quite have a way into yet). I generally don't think about the drift of my creativity in the long term because when I do I usually draw the wrong conclusions.

I don't really classify my life, the way some people who've had high-impact injuries do, as before-TBI and after-TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury -- the fairly severe concussion I had in January of 2020). For one thing, given I had to cancel a trip to NYC because of it, it may have saved my life; I almost certainly would have caught COVID as someone with known lung issues in New York at the time. For another, the TBI was way scarier to almost everyone else; for me it was just one more dumb injury I gave myself and I didn't even remember most of it so it hardly registered. I used to open the story of it with a joke about waking up not remembering going to bed the night before, but nobody ever found it funny.

It's true that there are changes it wrought in my life, though. Even practical stuff like making sure my living space doesn't have tripping hazards and continuing to wear a fitbit even though I don't really need to (the fitbit told us, the morning after, exactly when the concussion happened, because it registered a heart-rate spike when I fell). For weeks after, I had to move slowly and put off making important decisions because I couldn't trust my physical or intellectual judgement; I didn't even jaywalk in my own neighborhood because I couldn't be sure I was judging the cars' speeds properly. For about a year after I had periodic post-concussion syndrome which basically just slammed me back into concussion space, which wasn't painful or upsetting but was definitely inconvenient.

And it's also undeniable that my writing shifted after the injury. It's not necessarily because of the injury, since my initial recovery from the TBI and the declaration of quarantine happened at roughly the same time, and anyone who tells you that a years-long global pandemic didn't impact their artistic expression is selling you a line. But the last thing I wrote before the TBI was the first draft of Six Harvests, and aside from the Six Harvests publication draft, which had fairly minimal changes, almost all that I've written has been blue-sky, light-hearted, PG-rated romance. It's been on my mind that I've been writing different subject matter from what I used to, but the timing of it didn't strike me until just recently.

I don't mind, really. I love fandom and I support fanfic in whatever expression it comes, but I'm also happy writing my own stories. While I'm aware it's been years since I've meaningfully written fanfic, it doesn't bother me per se, as long as I'm writing. It bothered me much more when I could write fanfic but not original fic, especially in those last few awful months at my last job. I'm proud of the literary and non-genre fiction I've written in the past, but it's also much more trying and frustrating to write at times, so I'm enjoying having a different sort of challenge that feels more fulfilling in the process. I'm sure at some point I'll go back to literary fiction -- there are ways in which it's hard to avoid turning the later Shivadh novels into literary fiction, being honest -- but for now I like what I'm writing, and I'm writing primarily to please myself and without regard to what's necessarily rational or linear.

Just struck me, is all, that it's by far the most noticeable major shift in my work. I do sort of wonder what will be next.

[cha-melodius]

2024 Fic Year in Review

My fifth fic year in review! It's always wild to go back and look at how far I've come. As always, feel free to grab this if you want to do your own; I've stitched it together over the years. And thank you to everyone who read my fics this year, whether it was one or all of them.

2020 | 2021 | 2022 | 2023

AO3 Username: chamel My Page: Link Active Fandoms: Red, White & Royal Blue: 14 works Loki: 3 works The Man from UNCLE (2015): 1 work New Fandoms: The Pairing (CMQ novel; 1 work) Total Number Of Completed Works/Word Count This Year: 23 works, 303k words All Time: 135 works, 1.57 million words

Most Popular One Shot (by kudos): This Year: Trying My Patience (Try Pink Carnations) (RWRB, Alex/Henry, E, 9.4k) All Time: Class(room) Warfare (RWRB, Alex/Henry, T, 7.8k words)

Most Popular Completed Multi-Chapter (by kudos):  This Year: False Dichotomy (RWRB, Alex/Henry, E, 62k) All Time: Please Don't Let Me Be So Understood  (RWRB, Alex/Henry, E, 20k words)

Events/Challenges: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. Gift Exchange 2024, A Royally Big Bang, Lokius Reverse Bang, idk do what you want exchange

More reflections, stats, and planned fics below the cut!

Additional Random AO3 Stats

By number of fics: 79% one shots, 21% multi-chaps

By word count: 69% multi-chaps (nice), 31% one shots

Ratings by number of fics: 48% E-rated, 26% M-rated, 26% T-rated

Musical artists contributing highest number of titles: spread out this year, but Wilco, Metric & Sufjan Stevens came in with 2 each

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected?  I was wrong in my 2024 roundup post—I wrote 25k more words this year despite having 10 fewer fics. Which I did NOT expect. I figured I was trucking along to make my usual ~270k, but I forgot about The Secret Fics lol.

What’s your own favorite story of the year?  I think I have to go with Body and Soul(mate), which I'm just so so proud of. I love how it came out and I think it's really original.

Did you complete your writing goals from last year?  The Goal: My goal is to have a similar mix of fics as least year, and also to write my first collaboration with @cricketnationrise, which will be a long multichap. First part, pretty close. I wrote more multichaps (21% vs 15%) this year, which meant fewer fics in total. Second part, oops. Cricket and I have both been busy, but the hockey fic lives!! We'll get to it eventually!

Do you have any writing goals for the New Year? I can't believe I'm gonna say this but... write more original fiction. See below for more on that. Fanfic wise... finally finish some of the planned stories I've had kicking around for a while.

Did you take any writing risks this year? I submitted a pitch for an anthology, was accepted, and wrote my first original story! I had a lot of fun with it and I think I'll purse more next year. Idk if I'm ready for a whole novel and trying to get (more) published, but we'll see.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Even though it's numbers have come up since publishing, I'm still gonna go with The Impossible Soul, aka my Westworld-esque android/human AU.

Most fun story to write: Probably Body and Soul(mate). Figuring out all the body swaps and soulmate lore was a lot of fun and the whole thing just flowed so well.

Biggest disappointment: Why do I keep this question? I hate complaining publicly. 😂 My biggest disappointment is that I sometimes let fandom drama/trends/popularity make me feel bad. Being mad because a fandom loves X type of fic doesn't help anyone.

Biggest surprise: I'm not sure I really had any big surprises this year. Biggest surprise in my stats was that my percent of explicit works is way up—T used to be my most-used rating. Part of that is publishing fewer one-shots, since those tend to be T for me, whereas a long fic is more likely to be E.

Coming soon/planned for 2024: It's a little depressing how so many of these are the same as last year. Hence the resolution above, I guess.

Kissed Out (RWRB pro-pool players AU)

RWRB 1940s noir AU

RWRB conductor/piano soloist AU

RWRB Jurassic Park AU

RWRB rodeo rider/polo player AU

RWRB hockey AU (with cricket)

A shitload of prompts from my fandom fest

Extremely delinquent MTH fics

TMFU art thief/gallery owner AU

Thanks to folks who tagged me in their year in review posts, including @loki-is-my-kink-awakening, @kiwiana-writes, and @porcelainmortal

[hanaybuns]

Happy Karamatsu day 2/22

i honestly have nothing of substance for you guys today, i'm just gonna talk about karamatsu, as i always do

hmmm it's kind of hard to describe why i like karamatsu or the way i enjoy his character. sometimes, characters really just click for me and there's no other explanation. maybe it's because i can see myself in him? i'm not sure. but also i started watching osomatsu san in 2020 and my fave at the time was jyushi. kara was in second place. that being said, i never engaged in any fan content when i first watched the show and i only started liking kara more after i got into ososan fanart and fanfic.

i actually only got into ososan seriously when the season 4 announcement came out and i was like "huh, it's been a while since i've gotten news about osomatsu san". that was when i really started looking into the fandom and discovered the horrors. in the beginning though, i really liked karamatsu angst. i loved all the super angsty fics where kara went through something horrific, i still do honestly. it's funny because i like putting him through really horrible stuff in my brain, but the second i see him upset about something in canon i feel so sad for him.

something about me is that i really really enjoy drama and good character dynamics. i can put up with the worst pile of slop plot if i can latch onto the characters and analyze their relationships. so osomatsu san was really a treasure trove for me, because you can really tell that the writers give each of the characters subtle nuances and internal conflicts.

that being said, i always like to keep my analysis and head canons based in canon. it's actually more like i'm bound to it. i get weirdly embarrassed when i write something that i feel doesn't really line up with the show. but that's also the challenge when it comes to writing about karamatsu. the writers give us so much, but also so little when it comes to his character and his internal conflicts. so you have to go out on a limb if you want to talk about something that isn't fully discussed in canon. but when i read some of my analysis back, it lowkey feels like this

but i get soooo happy whenever i see anyone write anything in response to my writing. even a simple "i agree" makes me so giddy! i want everyone to know that when you write a comment or reblog my work and write stuff in the tags, i read all of it. then i read it again and again. especially when people choose to write an essay in the tags, it makes my day, truly.

so yeah, i'm excited for s4 and i'm probably gonna get a lot more annoying when it comes out, so get ready for that.

happy karamatsu day!

[emolo-m]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: All Creatures Great and Small (TV 2020) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Siegfried Farnon/Mrs. Hall | Audrey Hall Characters: Siegfried Farnon, Mrs. Hall | Audrey Hall Summary:

Posted as part of the ACGAS July 2024 challenge

Prompt: Birdsong

Thank you  @acgasfanchallenge for organising!

GIF by @owlsie-hoot​

[espresseo-cafe]

life is still beautiful | johnny | ch.1

genre: cappucino, romance, angst, university!au, dad!au, drama, slice of life

pairing: collegestudent!johnny x fem!reader

bean count: 4k

a/n: i’m so excited to be sharing this with you! it has been in the works since 2020 on and off and omg i can finally post this fanfic. this whole series has mentions of characters from different groups other than nct- red velvet, dreamcatcher, seventeen, sf9, etc to avoid confusion with people of the same name! note: this is only a work of fiction, it doesn’t reflect the artists’ personalities in any way.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

growing up, the continuous tingling feeling whenever you see your parents arguing at the end of your hallway always broke your heart. the raised voices, objects getting thrown around, and the banging of slammed doors against the doorframe deafened your ears. you remembered you had to knock on every single apartment on the floor; same, above, and below- to apologise the nuisance your parents caused. some with good hearts would understand out of pity for you, others would provoke to kick your family out of the building. so far, you’ve made it to several years without any notice from the landlord.

with that background, there weren’t any doubts that it affected the way you perceive everything in life. silence overpowered the joyous you like a large coat, it has been that way. the younger you wouldn’t understand the clash of your parents. the younger you wouldn’t know the problems they had. most importantly though, the younger you wouldn’t receive any love or support from them at all.

it was like you never existed.

as you hit the eighteenth mark, you’ve made the bold but practical decision to move out. the toxicity they emitted were too much for you to handle. with every penny or dime you’ve been saving everyday since you were twelve and some extra cash from various part time jobs since you were sixteen, you had your small carry on luggage packed and left first thing in the morning one summer. a dilemma kind of held you back whether to leave a note for your mom and dad, only deciding not to and tell them not to find you.

if there was anything you were blessed with even if you were put in a dire situation of a broken home, you had to pat yourself at the back for never failing your grades. just average and sometimes in the honorable mention’s list. thanks to that, you’ve secured a place at a university far from your family home.

and of course, choosing a location far off was more than intentional.

the first few months were a challenge, the surroundings took you sometime to familiarise. adjustment was never an issue though, running away from home was worth the change. as you expected, your parents didn’t bother to look for their only daughter. scoffing at the past, you realised it had almost been three years since you left.

making friends was easy too, to your surprise. known as the loner and depressed type in high school, you tried to change yourself a bit and managed to befriend a new crowd of people. of course, you were discerning on people who are worth to befriend, not the ones who’d waste your time. one of them being kim yoohyeon, who’s now your best friend and roommate.

“y/n, i’m going out to the store, want anything?” she asked while putting on a cardigan.

you hummed and rolled your eyes playfully, “hm, two packs of ramyeon and chips. you’re paying alright?” she threw a crumpled ball of tissue at you, gasping at the very direct response. “what? it’s two in the morning and i’m helping you pull an all-nighter for your fashion thesis due in two months and a half. i deserve a treat. be thankful i don’t have class tomorrow and that my part-time’s in the afternoon.”

“okay fine.” she dramatically slouched her shoulders down, “be back in a jiffy bub!”

as the door closed, you sighed and stretched your almost numbed body. yoohyeon’s project was half done, just needed a little more tweaking and you could say hello to a convenience store feast.

yoohyeon was the first person you met at orientation, she seemed to extract innocence at first glance. though as you got to know her, she was a meme in real life who possessed extreme talent in singing. you and her clicked, she had problems in her home but they were immediately managed. so she was all smiles from ear to ear. it was something you were envious of; to have a healthy relationship with parents, however, it wasn’t working with you at all.

sometimes you wondered how it felt like, to have someone love you like family. your aunts or uncles would message you to check on you, and whenever they brought your parents up, you shoved down the topic back to its grave. it’s dead conversation anyway. the latest update you heard from them was two years ago. they still lived in the same damned roof where they argued a lot, you wondered why they were still stuck to each other like glue. the only difference was that your dad worked the night shift while your mom on the mornings. so they probably never see each other eye to eye.

when they did though, all hell broke loose.

you were brushed off your thoughts when yoohyeon opened the door, “okay, here’s your food, time to pig out!”

“finally, i’m starving.” you had the hot water boiling before she arrived, immediately putting the ramyeon in the pot.

“so,” she started, opening a bag of potato chips.

“when are you planning to date? it’s been theee years since uni started and i’ve never seen you on dates before.”

you pressed your lips into a thin line, “not right now.”

“why not? you’re pretty, you can cook; you’re even taking an early childhood education course, specifically in special education.” she plopped one into her mouth and chewed shamelessly, “i bet you’re good with kids too.”

“so apparently that makes me an ideal girl?”

“an ideal girl worth to have!” she exclaimed, later reaching for your unlocked phone. “guess what, download this app and go have some fun.”

“if that’s tinder you’re planning on brainwashing me with, i’m not interested.” you joked, mixing the sauce and toppings with the now cooked noodles.

“you never know, it might work.” she singsonged.

you sighed, yoohyeon has been pushing you to date because she felt like you were like a hermit, always stuck in your own shell and would only go out if needed to. not that you were interested, you just wanted to get school done and make a stable living. love will come anyway.

she clicked on the app store and downloaded a trendy app named ‘love click’. “it’s an app solely made for university students within the state. kinda like tinder but you play anonymous with a made up nickname, no one will know how you look like.”

you raised a brow. “that’s dangerous than tinder, y’know?”

“this is different, they can detect fake accounts and do a facial recognition. anyway, once you put your actual photo and real age, it will automatically pair you with others similiar with yours; interests, and hobbies. then it will change your face to a random avatar if ever you do a video call.” she tapped away. “that’s how i met hwang minhyun.”

“eh, i still think it’s risky. besides, you just got lucky. you scored a hottie.” you slurped on the noodles. “i could never.”

“just try, you could always quit and they’ll never find you. and who knows? you might even receive the whole package.”

you sighed, “okay fine. i’ll do it just once, for you alright?” you finished the rest and threw the excess soup away. “i’m not doing any after that.”

“cool! all your details are in here already. let me know if someone messages you.” she gave you a playful wink before working on her project once again.

—

johnny stretched his limbs after a quick power nap, he haven’t had enough rest since he was on the clock 24/7. he turned to his side to check the time, sighing a relief when it was only 3pm. as if it was waiting for him to be awake, a text message from his mom appeared on the screen.

[ mom] : “don’t forget to eat, my dear john. you’ve got two mouths to feed ❤️”

johnny smiled at his mom’s reminder, he was relieved that the messages were reduced to a low, knowing how protective she was.

a loud thud on the floor made johnny stand on his feet and rush to the door next to his. his worried demeanor soon changed to a soft one when he saw a little smile beamed at him from the ground.

“youngmin-ah, what’re you doing on the floor? did you hurt yourself?”

the child just giggled, softening johnny’s heart every single he did so.

he remembered the night when the almost two year old came into his life. it was a rough beginning, but he managed himself and was proud how he actually did while still in school.

his friends were in full support of this unexpected scenario and would take turns in looking after the child while he worked the night shifts at a café. like any other people, his friends were in doubt at his decision of bringing him to lectures.

johnny again proved them wrong.

what surprised them wasn’t how the baby managed to be quiet in all of the classes, but how johnny effortlessly handled him if ever a fuss was made. kun recalled that in one of their exams in biology major, johnny had the baby cradled in one arm as the other wrote the quiz. the professor wanted to hold the baby boy while johnny did the exam, but young man refused to, saying that he could handle it. he wouldn’t want the baby crying in a stranger’s hold while everyone was so stressed for the exams. adding that the baby’s wails would be a distraction.

he became viral at the university page when a photo of him feeding youngmin a bottle of milk, that certain scenario made girls want him as a husband. sometimes they would stop by to say hello to him and the child.

“dada.” johnny smiled at title, the little toddler fiddling the bottle in his hand while his feet stretched up.

“seems like you’re alright.” he poked his nose, earning a giggle from the two year old. “i still have to check any injuries. say youngmin, your birthday’s coming up soon. what would you like?”

youngmin hummed, as if he understood the question clearly.

“well?”

“mama.”

johnny was caught off guard that he tickled the little toddler as he smiled. “buddy, you already have a mama though.” his phone dinged, indicating an incoming text message. “speaking of her, she just texted me.”

[ kim minji ]: sorry babe, couldn’t make it tonight for dinner. i got singing rehearsals.

[ johnny ]: it’s cool. how about tomorrow?

[ kim minji ]: i’ll see first, pretty busy.

he put his phone back into his pocket, sighing at the same excuse his girlfriend gave. he didn’t want to overthink but it had been like this for a while, he wondered if she had fallen out of love. shaking his head, he shrugged off the thought to the back of his mind.

youngmin turned his full body to the side before standing and climbed onto johnny’s kneeled figure, the bottle still in between his baby teeth. “mama, where?”

“she’s not coming home tonight. maybe some other time.” he ruffled youngmin’s soft hair, eyes closing due to exhaustion. but then the little toddler smiled and patted his cheek and johnny wrapped his arms around the little frame. “come on, let’s get you dinner, we’re having your favourite!”

“lasagna!” youngmin put arms up, and johnny could melt anytime.

“hey you said it perfectly this time! well done my so-“ he paused as his phone dinged, a snapchat notification from taeyong appeared on the screen. making the toddler tilt his head to why the young man stopped mid-sentence. “let’s go to wash your hands alright?”

while youngmin nodded then hopped away towards the bathroom, swiping to unlock his phone, a snap video that his said friend sent made his eyebrows meet in an ugly mood.

[ taeyongss ]: bro is that jiu? your mj?

it was his girlfriend giving a lap dance to someone he couldn’t seem to recognise due to the flashing lights, she was enjoying it and the shocking thing was, she wasn’t drunk at all.

kim minji, his girlfriend since senior high, had a few names labeled on her. one of them was jiu (pronounced as ji-yoo) a nickname everyone called her in school, being one of the main solos for the choir.

some of the juniors called her a pink princess because of her obsession with the said colour. owning almost everything in it.

and mj was a form of endearment that only johnny used. his expression changed from a smile to a frown, throwing his phone on the bed that it bounced off and landed on the ground; earning his phone a crack on the screen.

“dada?” youngmin peeked through the bedroom door. now it was him to hear the thudding sound. “happen?”

johnny jumped a little seeing the child standing by the door with a towel in his hands. “my phone fell. come on, let’s eat.”

lasagna was a favourite dish youngmin adored eversince he brought him to an italian restaurant. meatballs were a favourite too, but something about lasagna topped it. as youngmin was busy making his hands dirty, johnny called his mom at this hour, she was probably home by now.

“ah my love johnny! i’m glad you called, what is it?” her voice still bright and lively.

“um, i was wondering if i could drop youngmin off tonight?” he played with the fork. “taeyong messaged me and i think i need to have a drink and hang out for a bit.”

his mom’s soft laughter brought relief to his ears, “oh sure my dear, your dad and i could need some company. it’s been quiet around here since you’ve grown.”

johnny smiled at the reply, “great, we’ll be there in ten.”

“see you later.” she singsonged.

after dropping youngmin off, he made his way to the bar where his girlfriend was. everyone who met johnny knew that he could be reckless when someone crossed over the line, who knows what scene he’d make tonight?

“johnny.” taeyong called out after seeing him enter the bar, johnny walking towards the bar where his friend was stationed at. “please don’t make a scene. my boss let you off the hook the last time you broke loose.”

johnny’s eyes scanned the area, looking for mj before looking at back at taeyong. “don’t worry. i won’t. this johnny won’t do anything.”

“better keep your word. she’s by the corner over there.” taeyong pointed with his head, “she’s been here for the past three months. good thing i’m the only one from campus who has seen her. if anyone else did she’d lose her solo spot at the choir. so called ‘angel’, huh? no offense.”

“none taken, but thanks bro. see you later at the dorms.” johnny said, then he walked through partygoers, the blasting music was deafening so much he hated it.

“i know right? he’s such a sweetheart.” mj said to her friend as she patted the guy’s shoulder who she danced with earlier. “i’d love to-“

“mj.” johnny’s cold voice rung in her ears, sending shivers to her spine. what is he doing here? “i’m guessing rehearsals ended early or it never existed.”

“babe i-“

“ey johnny suh!” the guy seated next to her greeted him drunkenly, the more he looked closer in the dimmed light, his blood boiled. “haven’t seen you since you had a baby! minji has been great to me recently.”

it was his high school rival, takuya terada.

“we’ll catch up soon won’t we?” johnny said sarcastically. takuya wouldn’t know anyway, his vision probably already blurry to even comprehend a straight conversation. he looked at minji, who averted her gaze towards him as she rolled her eyes. “we need to talk, outside.”

he took her by the wrist and he didn’t care if he was hurting her. she hurt him first; for a while now actually. he just had to put up a front before he vent out when they exited the bar.

“what the hell, minji.” he threw his grip away, minji holding her wrist and tsk-ed at the attitude. “is that why you’ve been missing out lately? you were cheating on me with takuya?”

“missing out? johnny you’ve been missing out too!” she raised her voice, “i don’t know if you have noticed but it’s been straining on the both of us recently!”

“so your solution was to hang out with another guy when you could’ve voiced out to me about your feelings? mj, we’ve talked about this!” he wiped his face frustatingly. “i don’t think-“

“i don’t love you anymore, john.” she said blankly, her face didn’t emit any pain she felt, it was like she wanted it out there. “that’s why i’ve been ‘missing out’.”

“you don’t.. love me anymore?” johnny stood in shock, his voice shaking a little.

“i fell out of love. i’m sorry.. i’ve been planning to tell you but i couldn’t.” she hugged her arms. “i didn’t want to hurt you.”

“my gut feeling told me there was something up. i was hurt just thinking about it. i don’t know but somehow i knew it all along that you were out of it. i didn’t bring it up because i held onto hope and believed my guts were lying that you cheated on me.” he said, his hands rested on his hip. “turns out i was right.”

“i’m sorry.”

“save it. i’m not hurt at all. maybe i just had to come here to confirm if it were true. you can live with that guilt that you’ve broken me already before you even said anything. i’ll raise youngmin myself. we’re done.”

johnny walked away while the cold wind sliced through his cheeks. usually in a breakup, one would break down. him and minji dated since high school, and there were on and off arguments here and there. they would always make up through talking, but to be told that she was cheating on him by another person sure sucked. he’d rather find it out himself and vent out right then and there.

guess this timing was actually better. though he told minji he was broken, he was actually so much more than that. he expected to at least shed a tear, he didn’t, for youngmin’s sake. even though he felt like an elephant was lifted off his shoulders, his heart was anchored deep below.

he felt so heavy with betrayal that his heart ached so much in a way he didn’t expect.

he wanted to break down so bad.

the door swung open of his family home and youngmin screeched a high pitched tone loud enough to startle the old man beside him, who was reading a newspaper. “oh john’s back.”

“dada.” the little one ran towards him, hugging his long legs for a second before johnny picked him up. “back!”

johnny’s mood changed like a shooting star whenever youngmin’s in sight. “hey little buddy! i’m back, i had to meet a friend earlier.” he kissed his cheek, “were you good to granny bear and papa bear?”

“he was an angel, john!” his mom gave her son a quick peck on the cheek. “who knew you could raise him very well? plus singlehandly!”

“he got it from me, my dear.” his dad took the chance to say, “are your studies going well though?”

“still a dean’s lister, dad.” johnny’s ears tinted a light shade of pink.

“that, he got it from me.” his mom winked at his dad, who scoffed at the remark. “where’s minji? you haven’t brought her here for a while.” the look on johnny’s face was too readable that his mom knew in an instant.

“we broke up. she had another guy behind my back.”

the sudden snickers from his parents left him in question, were they laughing? “great ‘cause we didn’t really like her for you!”

“really?.. wait, what?” he asked in disbelief, “anyway, i broke it off and i kinda knew she was out of it already.”

“took you a while to realize it, john.” his father just sighed, “are you going to get a new one?”

“what? no.” johnny chuckled awkwardly, “anyway we’ll take our leave now.” johnny shook youngmin a little before his parents bid them a goodbye. he walked towards his car and buckled him up. “ready to go, buddy?”

“ready.” he wiped his eyes, sleep covering him very soon. “music please.”

“which one?” johnny asked as he set the rear mirror to get a good look at him, knowing well what youngmin was going to say.

“coldplay!” they said simultaneously.

“now that, you got it from me.” he laughed heartily while they made their way back to his shared apartment with taeyong, jungwoo, and kun.

the clinks of the apartment keys had the boys look up from their game on playstation. jungwoo sighing frustratedly when kun defeated him thrice in a row. “seriously? you’re cheating, kun hyung!”

kun stretched, “clearly not. you’re just a bad player.”

“could one of you dumbasses get the kimchi from the table?” taeyong shouted from the kitchen, only to be greeted with youngmin having the wanted side dish in his tiny hands. “see, youngmin just got here and he did a better job than you two!”

“it’s loud in here, damn.” johnny took his shoes off while youngmin had his phone in his hands.

kun sat on one of the couches, eating the kimchi fried rice taeyong just made. “so you met up with minji, how did the dinner go?”

taeyong nudged the younger boy, and jungwoo looked confused. johnny couldn’t blame the two, they didn’t know what actually happened. “these two lovebirds called it quits tonight.”

“what!?”

“yup.” johnny popped his lips, “takuya terada”

kun’s eyes widened, “like.. takuya from high school?”

“they suit each other anyway, the biggest flirts of ____ high.” jungwoo chewed on a kimbap. “no offense.”

“none taken, i feel relieved anyway.” he sat down spotting taeyong busy typing on his phone. “you still looking for girls on love click?”

“well yeah, someone should at least find me attractive.” he replied.

jungwoo snickered before choking on his food, “as if anyone would see your face through a filter system on the app. just what is the university thinking?”

“ha, wait until they see this handsome thing for real.” he turned to johnny, “bro you should try looking for new love, you’re in need of it right now, you know?” taeyong locked his phone to continue eating the almost midnight dinner.

“please, i’m still freshly ‘heartbroken’, don’t tempt me.” johnny rolled his eyes.

“mama.” youngmin shook the huge phone, a selfie of johnny and minji flashed the screen.

“not mama anymore.” he told him, then youngmin clicked on another app.

“mama.” he showed them the love click app; the color scheme of red and pink caught his attention. and johnny scrunched his brows, the other three smirking at each other.

“seems like he wants a new mama.” kun teased, earning a death glare from johnny. “what? that whole daddy look of yours is attractive to almost every girl in campus. just wife someone up already!”

shaking his head, he couldn’t believe the encouragement from his friend. “too soon my bros.” johnny chuckled, “maybe i’ll give it try after a few weeks or so.”

johnny sat by the bed while youngmin slept with his sausage pillow. now that he thought about it, the little boy hadn’t seen minji in months. it was obvious that he’d look for her. but what he didn’t get was that he showed love click; a dating app he didn’t remember installing.

“mama.” he recalled youngmin say.

he dimmed the lights and sat beside youngmin, patting his bottom gently as he drifted away into slumber, he too was getting sand in his eyes. he pressed his lips into a thin line, halfheartedly created an account just in case he really needed it.

“this is stupid.”

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taglist: @titanmaknae29 @joepomonerof @lovesuhng @studyingthemind @cheyehc

[below-average-fangirl]

Chapters: 4/? Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Additional Tags: Women's Underwear, Lust, Love Confessions, Idiots in Love Summary: A compromising situation may at last spur Siegfried into action.