#14+ year olds should know better than this tbh

[so-i-did-this-thing]

Hello! I just wanted to say I stumbled across one of your posts and ended up looking through the trans tag in your blog for a while and idk it felt so so nice to see a middle aged trans guy just living life and being there for others who are at earlier points of their own trans related journeys, and I hope I can look as awesome as you and be as comfortable in my own skin and style and everything when I'm older.

I guess I also wanted to ask if you had any insight or advice about a couple things, if you're willing to share.. First thing is, did you ever struggle with passing but looking much younger than your age and that somewhat affecting your perception of yourself? I'm 28 and I started T 11 months ago (though at a pretty low dose because I wanted slow changes) and my face just recently started visibly shifting to a more masculine contour and I love it, but I still don't really look like a 28 year old guy.

I've always passed easily even before T but people think I'm like 18-21 max. Things were fine while I was in college (I came out at 19 so for a while my face just felt fitting enough and didn't make me feel either dysphoric or in a weird age limbo) but every year it feels more frustrating and makes me feel sort of alienated from myself including in mental ways, like I'm just a little kid who can't grow up. Like I'll never look like a "real guy" even though I can be stealth because I look like a weird teen and not like a grown up man. It's especially bad when I look at my amab younger siblings who are now also adults and see how I "should have looked" in some other life if I was cis. I guess maybe that's just another manifestation of dysphoria that I didn't have to deal with before? Did you ever experience something like that? And if yes did it get better after some years on T or how did you deal with it?

The other thing is just.. internalized transphobia. It's one thing to know things in a logical or intellectual sense but it's so hard to really feel and believe it sometimes and let go of all the awful transphobic stuff my family said to me during the first years of me being out. I just kept going anyway because I needed to be true to myself and my family basically bullying me wasn't gonna just magically change how I felt about my gender, but what it did do is put my already low confidence and self esteem (in this context regarding my gender) down on the floor. And sometimes I still just think and worry "what if they were right and I was wrong and I'll never be real and valid because of x y z", "what if I'm just delusional", "what if I'm a ridiculous freak". I know, in a way, that no I'm not. I'm just a trans person and they're just transphobes. But feelings like that just get to me sometimes and I don't really know what to do about them even nearly 10 years after coming out. Does that get better at some point? Just like you kinda stop giving a shit what people think about you in general as you get older? But how can you change those internalized views affecting what you think of yourself?

Bit nervous about asking this stuff tbh, so sorry it was so long also sorry if I worded any of it in a not so great way.

I will say though, that seeing older trans people like you does help a little bit. Just makes it feel like "hell yeah I wanna be like him when I grow up". So thank you for showing me that today ;u; (and also for inspiring me to put a little more thought and effort into my styling and fashion choices haha)

Heya, Anon! Let's see what I can cover here:

Looking young.

Oh my god, yes. I was getting carded to buy superglue and spray paint well into my late 30s (I started T at 33). When my partner first asked me out for a date, they were worried I wasn't old enough to drink yet (I was 36).

This is me 1 year on T, age 34.

Years 6 & 7 (ages 39 and 40), is when I feel I started looking older.

I feel like it's only been recently, 14 years in at 47, that I look in my 40s, and a "mature" adult. My beard finally getting full helped, as did my receding hairline. And I feel like my skin texture has toughened up enough, to where wrinkles show more.

That said, yes, it is tough and annoying to deal with. Even when people tell me I look like a particular cis man (where I actually see the resemblance, lol), when I look at us side-by-side, I feel like I'm just a pale shadow of him. I feel jealous and dysphoric, even while I'm flattered by the comparison. I wonder what I "should" look like, and it feels like something has been stolen from me. Its a roller coaster of emotions.

That feeling never really goes away, but you need to afford yourself some grace. You're going to be your own worst critic, and I guarantee you that, of many cis men you grew up with, you can probably still see the kid in them. So of course, you're going to see the kid in yourself.

But, you also just need to let time run its course. HRT is a marathon, and a lot of changes don't really settle for about 5 or 6 years.

I hate to say "enjoy it while you can" because I sure as hell bristled at being mistaken for a teenager or barely 20 when I was in my 30s. But do enjoy what you can of it. Because once you hit middle age, you're going to start dealing with a strange intersection of dysphoria and aging that I myself am still trying to navigate.

One other way I help myself get over negative feelings is to think of how differently my life would have been if I were cis. I honestly worry I would have been a worse person; even though being trans creates a lot of obstacles in my life, I feel like it's been a net gain: being able to know myself so well and help others learn about themselves.

Internalized transphobia

This got better for me with age. My epiphany was that, even over a decade into my transition, I was still softening myself for the benefit of friends and family. I was still using my gender-neutral birthname (I only recently changed it). I would call myself a "person", "guy", or "dude", instead of a "man". I dressed on the young and casual side, eschewing full-on masculine outfits like proper suits with ties.

I only recently pulled myself out of this. It still is a habit-in-progress to refer to myself as a man, even though I have always felt like one. And I've started to dress more vintage, not just because of hyper fixations, but because it's a way to lean into a presentation that is unequivocally, "this is a middle-aged man". And it's done a lot of good for my mental health.

What I'd suggest is to see if you are holding yourself back in any way wrt your gender presentation or how you talk/think about yourself. Give yourself full permission to acknowledge that you are a man, full stop. You're a young man, sure. But still a man, and a full-ass adult at that.

I hope some of this helps. Transition gives us a unique toolset for examining who we are and how we want to move through the world, and that work certainly doesn't end after finally getting on HRT. <3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not going to take care of my sick grandma?

This happened like 10 years ago, but to this day I still think back to it and I cannot decide if I was the asshole in this situation or not.

Anyway, back then I was 14 and was just minding my own business until one of my (adult) aunts contacted me and told me that I should skip school for about like a week because my grandmother was sick, and someone should take care of her. (To be clear my grandmother used to live about 3 hour drive away). I did not get any details about the sickness and I just assumed it was the common cold (I am still not sure if it was just the common cold or not, I think it was the cold combined with high blood pressure. Either way my grandmother is still very alive and mostly well, it wasn't deadly).

Anyway, I asked why couldn't any of my four adult aunts go and take care of my grandmother instead, because

(a) I didn't want to skip school;

(b) I was 14 (no car!) and to get there I had to take the bus that goes like twice a week;

(c) I hadn't really taken care of a sick person before.

All my aunts found excuses, and they were either "I have work" or "I have children", and tbh I didn't think the work excuse was different from my school excuse. And the children excuse (for aunts not working) seemed like a really lame excuse because all my aunts had husbands/boyfriends at the time who could take care of their children, or they could even take their own children together with them, it's not like that was impossible.

Overall it ended up with my aunts ganging up on me and calling me heartless about not going. Even my 5th aunt from abroad was involved and she yelled at me and said she was ready to buy tickets for her 11 year old to fly in and take care of our grandma (she didn't do that of course but it still made me feel extremely guilty that an 11 year old was, like, mobilized for the trip).

But at the end, a week or so passed with us arguing and shifting blame onto me, and my grandmother got better by herself, and even my grandmother was mad at me for not going, she kept sending passive aggressive remarks like "now I truly know who is on my side".

Either way, my grandmother really needed the help and I did not go. But on the other hand, I had a gang of adult aunts who did not have any better excuses than I did, and I was still a child (even though I admit 14 is not exactly the age of a helpless child).

So, tumblr, what do you think, was I the asshole in this situation?

P.S. If it helps to add on any other context - I am the eldest granddaughter

What are these acronyms?

[ironstakes]

Any extra details of Tango’s design in CTiB? 🙏

I’ve been thinking about this fic a lot today, and the drawing is helpful but I’d love to know more <3

Yesssss oh boy do I! So this is all non-official and subject to change unless it is specifically noted in the actual fanfic. I try to keep those depictions vague and and open to interpretation so people can get creative and envision whatever they think is coolest.

I don't think any of my designs are standard. It doesn't help that these are from across 3 or 4 years? Anyway. Have fun!

Firstly, I'll dump some old and new sketches with YCTiB Tango! I'll include some (one) posted here and some (the rest) not posted. Then I'll talk about ideas, thoughts, and the like that I've had and have.

Pictures!

Misc collection added to one pic for convenience (those white bg cutouts are the very first sketches of YCTiB Tango actually):

"Never touch a redstoner's redstone" ch 14. sketch (w-what if the redstone scars glow... O-o); red and blue outlined scar versions:

A fake screenshot attempt I gave up on halfway through based on a part from ch 6.:

The first real (and only) character page for Tango once I had a better idea of what I wanted:

And now words!

I felt that Tango's hair should be somewhat flamelike, largely as I feel as though it fits his personality very well. Very energetic and something humans enjoy, but only while its under control. Tango is as eldritch as any of the hermits. Sometimes the fire consumes everything. With all this in mind I used various fannon fire hair ideas and chose the general shape everyone else seemed to adopt that sort of mimics a flame (smooth at the wick/head and irregular at the top/back).

I personally kept his eyes a brighter red rather than a deeper more blood-like red. The symbolism of blood colored eyes doesn’t apply to Tango, hence my choice. I also think about his eyes glowing on occasion (redstone contamination?), but it is just a fleeting idea for me. I think the eye glow from a story pov should be more sharingan in nature for theming and such, but remember this is my constraint for storytelling! Everyone else is free to do as they wish.

Something NOT in the sketches that I have changed my mind about is that the pattern, if it even exists, would be on the outer greyish purple layer and not the high collared top. This is because I think it would fit in with the kinds of clothes in the Naruto verse more; the outer layers tend to be more decorative and detailed and I figured I could stick with that.

The metal cuffs he wears are mentioned in the story to go along with his kekki genkai. Something I was debating was the use of gems in this modded world and although they have been introduced, I am indecisive as to if his cuffs have any of the gems imbedded in them or not. Something I'll leave to the readers I think! But here were some rough ideas I had. TBH I'd probably change them based on whatever looked coolest at the time, haha....

On the gems- I've been thinking to use them in jewelry of all sorts to replace armor, so I was considering giving YCTiB hermits stud earrings? Just something innocuous, a deceptively simple armor. Tango could rock some white earrings and Etho might have a yellow set? Just something sweet and easily misinterpreted to keep the gag going :3

A huge change-idea I had recently was to replace the “ugly boots” with cowboy boots. I can totally see a cool boot competition occurring! And I mean, have you seen cowboy boots???? They are perfect

The card boots scream Keralis at me! These kinds of shoe design ambiguity opens up a lot of opportunity for cool design choices. These photos are of a boot book I picked up from the library, fyi; it’s called Cowboy Boots by Tyler Beard. An incredible person DMd me some fanart a while back and they chose the classic ninja sandals! Makes perfect sense for Grian, who is rather ninja-ish. It looked really cool. I’d not worry about the shoes too much, feet are weird yet full of opportunity. You could go a lot of places. The only thing specified in the story was that they were leather, and that can be a lot of things. Anything really.

I’ve observed that most Naturo characters have baggy or loose looking pants, or maybe the fabric just bunches up more than I’d expect. Regardless, the pants are always long on guys? So I figured I’d just yoink that and blanket apply it to the hermits. I’ve only seen shorts on women ninja (not civilians) and kids in the show that I can recall. That matches up with the hermit skins so it made sense to adopt (maybe with the exception of Pearl?). The pants going to the calf or to the ankles or being even longer than that isn’t something I have a specific thought train on.

Briefly, I considered glasses for Tango, but they are rather uncommon in Naruto so I passed on them. Nail polish is more common, but moreso for ninja than civilians I think. At least regular, working class common people. The fancy people might have nail polish, but I didn't take too much note of them and their details. Makeup is seen across the board but I'm too distant from make up to do anything with it, much less understand Japanese culture around make up and then extrapolate that into a fictional world. Not even touching warpaint or tattoos. I do image that the hermits would have no need for it though. I like to think that in their regular forms, "changing skins" lets them look however they want. So what is makeup to instantaneous physical alterations at will not limited to color?

He's got the inventory book and a few of the weapon/tool stick things on him. I might doodle up some of those later now that I think of it.

On appearance- the scars as described in the story don't match up with the images. I guess what I am saying is there is flexibility. It exists. I think I described one of the arms as having a large continuous scar? But for the pictures I focused more on making them look like explosions. On that npte, I was reading a bit about burn scars, and they can be shiny. That made me think about the impossible properties of redstone and originally, I thought it'd be cool if the edges glowed, but that sort of morphed into the edges being very glowy and the rest being regular glowy. No idea if this will appear in the fic at any point but it seems like a cool visual.

Anywhozle, remember that fun and creativity are key! Go find weird fun things and see if they fit with the characters/world from what you know and go nuts! I love seeing different ideas and interpretations of everything, including my own ideas. I hope my thoughts help and spark joy, but it's not the gospel. Follow your fun and thank you for asking! I enjoyed responding, but hopefully this avalanche isn't too much to parse through. Feel free to poke me for elaborations or with any new ideas :D

[my-pjo-stuff]

I can't go beyond the idea itself so...

Reverse AU, where 14-year-old Annabeth and 12-year-old Thalia find 7-year-old Luke and take him under their wing.

Ok so first off, THANKS for sharing with me. Second off, LET'S GET INTO IT.

So this AU has two ways it can play out. With either Luke being the one to take Annabeth's role (becoming friends with Percy, going on the quest) and Annabeth being the one to betray camp. Or Luke still being the one to betray camp with the ages simply being diffrent. Now I'm not gonna lie I think both versions have MAD potential. My personal favorite is the one where Luke STILL BETRAYS CAMP. (Mostly bc I think that in the other version all would stay the relative same, just with Annabeth and Luke switching roles) Just imagine how much worse the angst would be. Like, just imagine Annabeth. Imagine Annabeth watching Luke grow, trying to take care of him. Imagine Annabeth being the one who Luke came to with all his troubles and issues, promising Luke family. How she would never end up like his own mother or their families. And now imagine Annabeth when Luke leaves camp. Like, let's say Luke went with Percy on the quest instead of Annabeth at 12, but the betrayal still happens at the same time as it did in canon. Think about how she must feel hearing that Luke, at 12 years old, went off and ran from camp to revive Kronos. Just IMAGINE how Annabeth must blame herself. Luke was so, so young still. She promised she'd be his family- yet how come she never noticed this? She knew that Luke had his issues with the gods, but she'd never expected it to get like this. I think that, due to the fact that Luke is SIGNIFICANTLY younger in this AU, we'd lean a lot more into him being manipulated or "brainwashed" by Kronos. Certainly that's also the stories most people at camp and Annabeth would believe- thus instead of "hunting Luke down" being talked about at the very end of TLT it's "rescuing Luke". That only makes it so much worse SOM rolls around and Annabeth will have to inevitably realize that no. Luke isn't brainwashed or manipulated. He is doing this out of his free will. I think Annabeth, being much older, would really take up a sort of caretaker role for Percy. Luke on his end may react pretty badly to it, as he perceives Annabeth as "already having replaced him". He'd also be taken less seriously by other campers due to his age and being less of a caretaker. I think in that case Luke would appeal to many of them as a peer as he plays more on frustration than he already did in canon.

For TLT.....idk how Thalia would react tbh. On one had, she'd probably still see Luke as a traitor. On the other, he's like, 14 in this. And I do think his age would change a lot in terms of him being seen less as evil traitor, and more misguided and used kid. Annabeth would be especially quick to take the sky from him, considering that she's the caretaker of Luke in the AU. Percy may start to resent him though, as he wouldn't have that "oh he's just a kid" mindset with Luke due to their same age. Thalia would probably still join the hunters. The fact that she pushed Luke off the cliff at the end of TCC would probably not paint her in a very good light to Annabeth though (also would be a lot more fucked considering Luke is 14 instead of 21 here.) The only good thing I think could come from this is the fact that Annabeth would probably help Luke should he come to her and ask to run in the time skip between TCC and BotL. I don't think she'd have the heart to drive the kid away she had promised to take care off. Meaning Luke probably wouldn't have gone off and become Kronos' vessel. The gods too might be inclined to mercy at Hermes' urging, considering that Luke in that case would be viewed as a manipulated child. Someone who couldn't know any better and was used by Kronos.

Especially with Luke running away on his own it could work. Should that not happen, and should Luke do end up as a vessel for Kronos...man Annabeth would cry. Because that would mean she failed Luke. She couldn't protect him like she promised. When it get's to the throne room I think Annabeth would apologize. Genuinly apologize for "failing" him. Which is what I think would bring Luke back enough for him to kill himself. At the end of it all having Luke die at 16 would really hammer home the Percy parallel, but it would also hit the 23 year old Annabeth MUCH harder since she sees herself to be directly at fault for what happened.

[do11yhrtz]

BETTER CR ✸ EXCERCISE

( ib : @zaddizu excercise )

01. heavy makeup, soft makeup, or none?

most of the time i wear no makeup like at school or at the dance studio but sometimes i like doing a full face for funsies

02. an artist you'd like to watch play live?

well i'm going to several concerts this year, but other than that maybe sabrina carpenter?

03. is your life dangerous?

not at all omg

04. if you were to change one aspect of your life, big or small, what would you change?

maybe my school. i like my current school but i miss my old school sometimes

05. how do you dress?

tbh it changes depending on my day, mood, etc. my most common outfits are; crop top + baggy jeans, or something more 'mature' like ralph luuren sweaters and polo shirts. i also enjoy wearing baggy shirts. during summer my style does a whole 180

06. are you popular?

i mean on social media i am, however at school i keep to myself more. im friends with my whole class but i prefer just sticking to my small friend group. i also have other friends outside of school if you want to count that? but i generally don't think/worry about popularity

07. what if your mbti?

infp

08. favourite season?

100% summer. like lets be fr. GUYS I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL SUMMER. especially in europe omg

09. are you an organised person?

i mean i would like to be, but i'm not tbh

10. what is your occupation?

a student, and an influencer if that counts? i don't take it too seriously though

11. whats an attractive aspect you admire? this doesn't have to be physical or romantically, just an admirable trait.

genuinely not caring about what other people think. like not in a nonchalant way, but more like of they don't care if they're being 'too cringe' or something like i love chalant people

12. do you know any instruments?

i play the electric guitar and the piano <3

13. do you have a partner? a crush?

i always have little crushes just for funsies but if they asked me to date i'd prob say no...

14. biggest ick?

getting mad easily. especially if its because of the teacher like it's really not that deep you really don't need to be huffing and puffing like the big bad wolf

15. whats a song that describes you?

7 rings - ariana grande

girls - the kid laroi

16. something you carry 24/7

my phone ofc!

17. look into your bag/purse, whats in there? is it messy? organised? what bag is it?

i never use purses tbh like i just put it in my pockets. for my school bag i just put in essentials like my phone, pencil case, folders, etc

18. where do you spend most of your time?

the dance studio. i luv it sm like my dance crew and i made it into a safe place <3

19. whats your favourite time of the day?

the afternoon when school is over and i can just enjoy the rest of the day

20. what are you known for?

being extremely indecisive. i can't decide what my style is, what vibe my room should give off, or what type of vids i post on tiktok & youtube. one day i'm wearing a ralph lauren jumper with jeans while filming a vlog, and the next i'm wearing a baggy tshirt and baggy jeans while filming a chaotic challenge with my friends

21. do you enjoy lifestyle?

ofcourse, i'm literally living the teenage dream

[idcpxseur]

re: jess' tiktok

this post got a bit long so im cutting it for space but tl;dr i talk about how jess explaining her relationship with jason doesn't exactly paint aarmau in a better light and in fact makes it worse.

okay so everyone and their mother has seen jess' tiktok at this point. i made a brief video talking about it.

the video was basically me saying to leave jess alone about stuff in the past, especially regarding her real life relationship. i also apologized for believing the rumors with no proof.

but i wanted to come on here and talk about the ramifications of presenting her irl relationship dynamic with aarmau in specifically PDH and Mystreet.

aaron knew about aphmau's age from the beginning. he knew that he was older than 14 y/o aphmau and he knew that shu was significantly younger than him because she talked about her first day of high school openly with him.

aaron was presented as the better option. the savior. the knight in shining armor. he was mature and older than aphmau's of-age peers. he was always the person that aphmau could cry to and her escape.

in mcd that wasn't a problem because aphmau was an adult. but aphmau was a child in PDH, any way you swing it. i think PDH feels even grosser to me considering how they upped aphmau's innocence and naivety, making her appear even MORE childlike and wholesome.

because, like, jess. you weren't 15 when you wrote PDH, babe. if you knew it was wrong in real life why on EARTH would you put it in your fiction. if you as a grown ass adult knew that what you did as a child was wrong, why would you go on and GLORIFY IT in PDH and mystreet!

because no one calls out aarmau aside from sylvanna who is potrayed as a "psycho helicopter parent who doesn't really care about her kids happiness" when (in this specific case) she was RIGHT to be worried about aaron!

there's a difference between bringing awareness to a certain topic and fetishizing or glorifying it and that's what jess did. she potrayed an unhealthy relationship dynamic with a huge power imbalance and was like "yes, young teenage girls, this is what you should look for in a partner! this is the type of man you want in your life"

and tbh with the context we now have, it kind of makes her look worse because if you as an adult knew this was wrong and you feel guilty for it that is fine. but what isn't okay is knowing this shit is wrong and still writing it like it's perfectly okay!!!

bare in mind: i am not shaming jess for what goes on in her irl relationship.

im just confused and concerned because im trying to sit with this thought process in my head and it does NOT make sense because this situation was so easily avoidable.

literally just make aaron in the same age group as garroth and laurence. theyre only older than aphmau by a year! hell make aaron a freshman too for all i fucking care just not a SUPER SENIOR who is about to go to GODDAMN COLLEGE and who is literally old enough to pay TAXES.

you could've even not had aaron in PDH at all and have them meet in mystreet if you still wanted aarmau to parallel your in real life age gap.

anything. anything at all would've been better than what jess did

[swiftsaltsweet]

Yokoya Days Ch 7: Kyoshi and Rangi Fight

Characters: Rangi and Kyoshi (RoK characters tbh)

Pairing: Rangshi (Mostly Rangi crushing and Kyo showing signs of attraction) and also showing Kyoshi's crush on Yun (as little as I can cause I'm biased~!)

Rating: T

Summary:

Ever wonder what Kyoshi, Rangi, and Yun were like before the whole Iceberg incident? How they first met? And so on? Aka, little episodic adventures of 14/15/16 year old Yokoyan Trio.

Canon compliant, end game pairings in the actual novel u_u

Other Sites: AO3 

A/N: TW for this chapter: fictional slurs and stereotypes (I used ones from the series). NO actual IRL slurs are used, just made up/fictional ones

And we got another uncomfy chapter :’) I dunno I feel like not only should it be explored but it’d be bound to happen? Ya got a privileged Fire National who is frustrated as all hell (and has a slight mean streak? Not that Hei or Kyo would notice that TT0TT)? And a girl who was raised to keep an open mind (Air Nomad mother and Air Nomad father figure), but is surrounded by outsider-hating Yokoyans? And they’re dumb 14 yos??? Something is BOUND to happen. TT0TT I feel like a more heated exploration is possible to happen before they become friends (maybe a more lighthearted/good natured exploration on the 4 nation stereotypes after they’re friends)?

Obvie and sadly can't go too far into it (they have to be able to bounce back after all TT0TT), but touching on it should be ok….. orz

____

Rangi dragged her pointer finger down the length of the table and then examined it. “Is this the best you can do?” she asked the nearby maid.

“Ah, well, um…” The high pitched maid, named Lanying, fumbled through her sentence. She was only a few years older than Rangi, maybe a year older than Lee. But Rangi was taller than most girls not only her age but even older (again, not including Kyoshi), and it was enough that it allowed her to slightly tower over Lanying. Making her more intimidating, causing the maid to fumble even more.

Kyoshi was hiding around the corner, clutching at the vase filled with flowers she had just come back from attending to. 

Why does she have to be here? Kyoshi sighed. The vase was large, and extra heavy with all the fresh water she just put into it. After Kyoshi fixed the flowers in the room, she was going to help Lanying with the cleaning. They’d only just started on the room after all, but the little red terror was already terrorizing them! How could they work in this environment?!

It’s too early in the morning for this. How long was I gone? What? Ten minutes? At least it felt like that… Does she think we’re superhuman with superspeed like her? Give us a break, we just finished the morning meeting. While Kyoshi could appreciate someone else who valued tidiness and timeliness, this was a little extreme even for her. Again, for spirits sake the day just began! Give them a moment to start!

Kyoshi readjusted her grip on the vase. She was in a tight spot. Yes, normally she would jump out and help her coworker out… But it was Rangi. Whenever the two of them were involved with anything, it usually spelled trouble for the coworker Kyoshi was working with. It would probably be better for Lanying if Kyoshi left and came back. 

Kyoshi would usually wonder if Rangi had a job to do (such as guarding the Avatar!), but apparently this was her job…too. To yell and instruct others. And she was damn good at it. 

It’s like she was born to yell. She’d fit better as a drill sergeant than whatever she’s doing here…

“Kyoshi!” Rangi snapped loudly, obviously reading Kyoshi’s thoughts and wanting to show off her impressive voice projection to prove a point. Regardless if she was really a mind reader or not, Kyoshi still nearly jumped out of her skin. She still couldn’t understand how Rangi was able to tell where she was despite being so sneaky. “I know you’re there, get over here!”

Kyoshi groaned inwardly and came out from around the corner. “Miss Rangi,” she bowed the best she could. The reciprocity for her politeness was a very deep scowl. 

Friendly as always. Well…at least she’s consistent. 

“Explain to me how it is you’re the only maid in this mansion who knows how to clean a damn thing!” She asked, resting a hand on her hip. 

It was hard to tell if she was complimenting Kyoshi, or just trying to insult Lanying (Kyoshi assumed the latter). Regardless, Lanying shot Kyoshi a scornful look from behind Rangi’s back, and Kyoshi couldn’t help but begin sweating. 

Is she trying to ruin my relationship with the other maids?! 

It seemed Rangi’s entire manner of operation was to just make Kyoshi’s life as difficult as possible, so she wouldn’t put it past her. But Kyoshi was pretty sure this was the eighth time the firebender had thrown one of Kyoshi’s colleagues under the caravan. And each time she did, Rangi would somehow drag Kyoshi into it. Usually to showcase where Kyoshi’s colleagues’ weaknesses lie, and how they could improve. Which did not endear Kyoshi to them at all.

Kyoshi sighed, knowing her fate was sealed. She decided she could multitask with her work while being scolded, made her way over to the table the vase belonged to, and put the heavy bastard down. She may as well attempt to salvage the situation.

“I disagree, Miss Rangi. Lanying is fantastic in what she does. We’ve only just started, it’s not fair to give us a full evaluation when we were just given the task.” 

It was the truth. 

“Hm... Still I don’t see much progress. Care to explain?” Rangi challenged both of them. 

Micromanage much? Kyoshi bit her tongue. She tried to recall everything they’d been doing up to that point.

“Well we spent a few minutes observing the area to see what we needed to tackle first, then Lanying was going to prep the area while I handled the flower situation.” Kyoshi glanced over and saw Lanying nodding her head enthusiastically. “And then once I came back we were going to tackle the whole thing together.”

Kyoshi was confident as she spoke. When it came to what she needed to do with her job and how to do it, she was always sure of herself. It was the one thing in life she was actually confident in.

“Tell me, Kyoshi, how long were you gone?” Rangi asked, looking at her nails. 

“I dunno,” Kyoshi shrugged. “Ten minutes?”

“Ten minutes?” Rangi rolled her eyes, “You were gone for nearly forty! That task was given to you over an hour ago!”

Kyoshi felt her heart stutter at the realization, and fear she was about to get in trouble. Had she really been gone that long? Ok, maybe she got a little side tracked from her main task but– She really was working the entire time! But Rangi may not know that–

“I already know where you were. You were helping Auntie Mui, Lee, and even the main gate guards were you not?” 

Kyoshi’s only response was for her eyes to widen to the size of plates. Ok, Rangi did know what she was doing… Had she been watching Kyoshi? Or did she just have eyes and ears everywhere? 

“So how is it,” Rangi continued while she started pacing the room. “How is it that you could get all of that done in that amount of time, but this one couldn’t even wipe the dust off of a table properly?”

Rangi looked at Kyoshi expectantly, as if they were conspiring together. Kyoshi really didn’t understand the firebender. 

“Listen, I’m sorry I got a bit sidetracked, but that’s not Lanying’s fault!” Kyoshi defended her coworker. She watched as Rangi’s face quickly fell from a ‘confident investigator’ persona to a pout that read ‘What the hell are you doing? Why are you undermining my words?’ “She thought I was going to be back sooner, so she didn’t want to do anything too drastic without me! What’s so hard to understand about that?”

Rangi closed her eyes in frustration and sighed. “It doesn’t matter if she had to wait for you! She should’ve figured out something to keep herself busy! She’s being paid to work, not stand around and wait! I shouldn’t have to hold everyone’s hand!” 

Kyoshi could feel herself getting irritated. She understood the need to earn her keep, but for Rangi to act as if they were machines instead of humans? Was she really so callous?

“What? Is it that this place isn’t as much of a well oiled machine as ones in the Fire Nation?” Kyoshi asked sarcastically. Gearing up for her next dig. Probably something about how Fire Nationals are (ironically) cold-hearted machines. Would explain their heartless and insensitive nature. 

Instead of a scowl that Kyoshi was expecting, Rangi’s eyes began to sparkle. “Yes, exactly,” she said, a hint (understatement) of pride radiating in her voice. “I’m so glad you understand.”

Rangi’s sudden elation took the wind and irritation out of Kyoshi’s sails, and dread started creeping up on her. 

No… Don’t look at me like that. Like I just agreed with you! It was the opposite! The opposite! Kyoshi bit her tongue, attempting to chew right through it. It seemed nothing she said in any scenario helped her in any way. She was damned if she did, damned if she didn’t.

Kyoshi could barely look at Lanying, who was certainly glaring holes into Kyoshi’s skull. ‘How dare you choose to side with the foreigner instead of backing up your own country and countryman!’ Was what she was probably thinking.

This was going to be a very awkward cleaning day.

______

The sun was high in the sky as Kyoshi pulled various weeds from the front garden. She was almost done, and when she finished, Auntie Mui said she’d make her a cool drink when she got back! She really should decline, but the sun and heat made one do crazy things.

This is the last treat, then I'm quitting cold squirrel turkey!

As Kyoshi pulled one of the final weeds, she saw two familiar blood red and black feet plant themselves next to her, facing away, and she sighed. She looked up to see Rangi, looking out, over to the main gate.

“Continue with what you’re doing, I just want to watch the show,” she said without so much as looking at Kyoshi.

Kyoshi frowned and stood up to look at whatever Rangi was watching. Her brow crinkled in confusion as she watched Lanying walking out of the mansion with some of the guards, carrying something. It looked like Lanying was trying to resist walking forward, talking with the guards very animatedly.

What on earth was going on?

“I really hate slackers,” Rangi announced out of the blue.

Then why do you act like you hate me so much? Kyoshi wasn’t a slacker, you’d think they’d get along on that front. But no. Rangi was abrasive as always.

The thought was quickly pushed away as she watched as Lanying was being escorted out to the front gate, a few of the maids following and seemingly yelling at the guards to stop. And then Lanying was thrown out. Kyoshi’s eyes widened as she realized what just happened. Lanying was fired. Was it because of this morning?

She stole a glance towards Rangi, who had a smug, self-satisfactory smile on her lips. Happy to have screwed someone out of a job. It didn’t take a detective to figure out that much.

The rage inside Kyoshi started to build from the indignation of it all. How can someone ruin another person’s livelihood like that, and look so pleased with themselves? How could Rangi lack any compassion? Was tar filled in her chest where her heart should be? Maybe that’s just how all firebenders were. They traded their ability to care about others in exchange for power. 

“Do you just like ruining people’s lives?” Kyoshi seethed, just barely managing not to raise her voice. She didn’t want to cause a scene, nor did she want to give Rangi the satisfaction.

That statement instantly wiped the smirk off of Rangi’s face, and she looked back at Kyoshi, confused. “What?”

“I asked: ‘Do you like ruining people’s lives?’” Kyoshi repeated. “Does it give you some sick joy? Destroying their income and livelihood? Knowing they may not have a meal in the future?”

“What? No. Like I said earlier, I hate slackers,” she repeated. As if that justified what she did. 

“It was just one day! She was imperfect for one day and you fired her?!”

Rangi snorted, trying to look unperturbed, but she was obviously getting angry. “Please, she never did her job. Let alone properly. She’s been lollygagging about day after day, getting other people to do her work while she thought no one was the wiser. Why would we need someone like her? Someone who’s a drain on our resources?”

“Drain on your–” that stopped Kyoshi up short. She felt sick. Yes, maybe Lanying wasn’t earning her keep like Rangi said, but to just be let go outright? Not given a warning? Not given a chance to repent and fix her behavior? Knowing one could be cut just like that... Kyoshi already thought that’s how things worked around here, feared it. But to see it working in front of her eyes? It all frightened her beyond imagination. 

She’d been right all along, despite reassurance from Kelsang and Auntie Mui. If she wasn’t careful she’d be next. Working here one moment, then cut the next with no warning, sleeping with the deer dogs on the street again. And Rangi was the greatest threat to all of that, just as Kyoshi had predicted.

“Yes,” Rangi replied, a smug smile growing back on her face. “You understand now, right? She needed to be cut loose, so we could run more efficiently!” 

But even still, Kyoshi couldn’t control her anger. Even if she could get fired. 

“Like in the Fire Nation?” Kyoshi bit out lowly.

“Yes! Like in the Fire Nation.” Rangi still had that smile on her face, unaware of the anger building inside Kyoshi. “We’re very efficient there. If you can’t pull your weight, you’re cut. Plain and simple. It keeps everyone in tip top shape and from being dragged down by dead weight. For some reason, the Earth Kingdom seems to not mind such weight, maybe it’s the rocks that you bend? I don’t understand it, but you needn’t worry, this is partially why I’m here. To fix problems like this.”

“You still shouldn’t have done that. Not like this, it wasn’t right. She should’ve been allowed to defend herself or at least get a warning.” Kyoshi gritted her teeth. “You’re just mean. A spiteful, elitist snob who doesn’t care about anyone but yourself. I just don’t understand how you take pride in cutting people down like this.”

The smile fell from Rangi’s face, cut down by Kyoshi’s words. Her eyes widened in shock before quickly forming into sharp daggers. “What?! No I’m no– Are you serious?! Are you an idiot?!” She pointed at her temple to exemplify her point.

“Maybe I am? At least I’m not someone full of hot air,” Kyoshi grumbled. 

She looked at Kyoshi incredulously, but only got a glare in response. “W–well you’re just a dipshit dirt eater!” 

Dirt eater... It was an insult that other nations had of the Earth Kingdom citizens. Probably because they thought they were poor and dirty. Uncivilized savages who ate rocks and dirt to survive. So this is what she thought of Kyoshi? Fine, Kyoshi had a feeling it was like this anyway. But at least she had confirmation now. 

Instead of Kyoshi defending herself, she decided to roll with the insult. It wasn’t untrue, at least...not in the way Rangi knew. “Maybe you’re right. Because I have eaten dirt before.”

Rangi’s face frowned slightly, uncertainty creeping onto it, not sure where Kyoshi was going with it. She wasn’t expecting that, she probably had enough sense that the dirt eater slur was a falsehood…for most people in the Earth Kingdom. But for Kyoshi, it was very much a reality.

“Sometimes it was the only thing I knew I could have for my next meal. Though I’m sure you never had to deal with something like that. Not everyone can be lucky enough to be born a rich ash–” Kyoshi stopped herself, but not quickly enough for Rangi to not know what she wanted to say. To see Rangi’s face recoiling and bracing for a verbal slap in the face. 

To be born a rich ash maker like yourself. What was the point of her slinging slurs around as well? It just made her feel dirty, and it wasn’t going to solve anything. 

Kyoshi grimaced, ashamed of herself. “You know what? No. I won’t stoop to your level,” Kyoshi spat. 

Rangi’s eyes widened and quickly looked down at the ground. Shame evident on her face. And then her jaw started flexing, and her signature scowl slowly formed on her lip; obviously annoyed she knew she was in the wrong and had no comeback. It should’ve been an ugly expression, one that reflected her inner cruelness but…no. It didn’t. Nothing Rangi did seemed to mar her beautiful features. She just looked more fierce and powerful, but beautiful nonetheless. And she probably knew that. 

Still, Kyoshi wished she could just… Just have one dig at her. She wanted to be cruel for once herself, but in a way that didn’t lower her to the same gutter as Rangi. Maybe it was petty and childish but…Rangi already had beauty, strength, money, and power. So why did she feel the need to take from others? 

“If you keep scowling like that, you’ll ruin your pretty face.” Is what Kyoshi wanted to say, to say it with so much vitriol, just to make Rangi second guess herself. To make her self-conscious. But she doubted Rangi could ever be self-conscious, it seemed like a foreign concept to her. So why bother?

Some people just have all the luck. Kyoshi thought bitterly. Life’s fairness was not equal to all. And it just felt so much more apparent when the two girls stood next to each other. 

Suddenly, Rangi’s eyes shot towards Kyoshi. Mouth opened, eyes widened, and face began to redden. Kyoshi wasn’t sure if she was shocked or angry or both. But…why?

Then Kyoshi’s eyes widened in reflection of Rangi as a realization hit her. “Did I just say that out loud?”

Kyoshi did it again, her tongue just did whatever it wanted, consequences be damned. Rangi probably thought the comment was impudent or something. 

Rangi apparently was at a loss for words too. Her cheeks puffing out. Kyoshi couldn’t tell if she was really fuming mad or…perhaps… Was she trying to avoid scowling? 

That kind of shocked Kyoshi, had her words actually affected the firebender? And why didn’t she feel the gratification she thought she'd feel? Maybe Kelsang was right, trying to bring others down was poisonous to one’s soul? Or maybe she didn’t like that she got caught? She’d have to reflect on this at a different time, namely a time that didn’t involve her skin potentially being barbecued. 

Kyoshi didn’t want to test her luck, it was best to just leave. “Please don’t kill me,” she said hastily.

With those parting words, she left the still fuming firebender to her own devices.

______

A/N: Me: *writes the beginning and end little bits* Oh yes, light hearted this’ll be fine. :) Me: *writing the middle part* …………gdi it wasn’t supposed to get serious orz Quick! We need to end it on a slightly lighter note! *sob*

Anyway, I wrote this one before 3 and 4 (and this was gonna come before chapter 5 ngl but *shuffles things around* it didn’t…as you can see), and I forgot about the pretty comment I made here when I did the other chapter so… *skull emoji* It’s ok, I can work with this! We’re reinforcing things I guess-I MEAN, this was all planned from the beginning! ;U Yes yes all planned, that’s right. Anyway, gonna make that topknot spiral. >:3c

“Hot air” and “rocks for brains” is more of an insult than a slur in this world (decided to avoid using rocks for brains here so it’s not tainted by future use). Dirt Eater and Ash Maker ARE actual slurs in Avatar.

“Why would Rangi say a slur tho?” Tbh, she’s an elitist (from the FN to boot!) and a dumb 14 year old, AND she’s getting used to a new culture (that may or may not be friendly towards her). And she already says a few mean things in the novels (I think mostly in RoK over SoK), but her being a little flippantly mean isn’t new. (and she may not have been exactly in the wrong for getting the lady fired, but the one person she’s trying to gain favor towards is yelling at her and now she’s just….frustrated) Aka, I think the recipe is there for her to screw up.

“Ok then what about Kyo almost saying one?” She was literally raised in Yokoya for most of her life, the same place that HATES outsiders and is a port town. I’m sure she’s heard lots of things, tho she probs doesn’t agree with them. Still, when you’re mad sometimes you want to say the worst thing that comes to mind so you can hurt the other person. At least that was the mindset I was going for. Tldr; kids who lack perception and self control to *not* do those types of things.

I dunno, I feel like it’s more interesting for them both to have some prejudice to overcome. They aren’t exactly free from the influence of their environment after all. And even tho Kyo doesn’t say the slur, she still assumes things about Rangi (esp throughout this chapter, and probs would have agreed with Rangi’s reasoning if she stepped away from her prejudice against her and fear of losing her job). So… *shrugs* both have some developing to do. It makes more sense to do it now than when they become friends tbh (or at least, I feel like it makes more sense to have these bigger misunderstandings/charged events to happen *now* than later. Because they are at their peak “I don’t understand you” phase).

(this is why I pushed it back, cause I needed a light hearted episode and this turned out not light hearted haha *sobs* Kyo you aren’t getting fired silly girl calm down ;w;/)

Kyoshi: I insulted the scary bodyguard girl, she’s probably gonna kill me… Rangi, later that night in her diary: The girl I like said I was pretty >////< Again! TT0TT

But for real, Kyoshi coming at Rangi with that one-two punch of a tonal whiplash (ง •̀_•́)ง (ง •̀_•́)—̳͟͞͞o (Now we know why Rangi finds Kyo infuriating, she pulls shit like this and then runs off TT0TT).

[xx-slug-xx]

Sluggy, i'mma tell you a story and I need you to spread it as far as you are able:

There once was this girl called Claire, she voiced Sweetie Belle in MLP:FiM, she started when she was VERY young and by age 14 she met a 23 year old fan of the show named Gabriel. Also known as Black Gryph0n.

Now, him being a fan of the SHOW wouldn't have been a BAD thing, if he didn't focus so much on becoming friends with this minor and her family. Years later, they got married. She's now 24 and he's 33. They both swear up and down that she wasn't groomed. And it would be acceptable had they met as adults. But they... Didn't.

Plenty of BIG youtubers have actively supported Black Gryph0n. Among them? Saberspark. Matpat. CG5. Saberspark specifically defended their relationship even from the words of her parents, whom were allegedly abusive. Even if they were it doesn't erase the ick.

Saberspark defended a pedophile. Don't believe him in anything he says.

Oh yeah that guys is absolutely discusting. Fist time I hear that story, I genuinely couldn’t belive it. It doesn’t make it any better that the dude absolutely was obsessed with Sweetie Bell’s character and used his relationship with her VA as a means to essentially get away with his fantasies surrounding the character. That’s a sick person. Even if you like a fictional character, it’s completely obsessive and unhealthy behavior to then groom that fictional characters VA just because you like that character. Because that’s absolutely what happened. Guys a pedophile even before they started dating tbh and I can’t ever see him without disgust

That’s the issue with people grooming minors until they are “of acceptable age” though. It’s such a nasty situation, and the groomers involved know that nobody can do anything about it legally since the victim is now an adult. And you can’t tell the victims anything because it only draws them closer to their groomer since they want to be adults who can make adult decisions for themselves. And it’s true, they are adults who can make those decisions. But adults are still victims of abuse in the same ways that minors can be, and that’s part of the manipulation tactic these people use. “I can’t groom you, you’re an adult”, when adults can be groomed as well. I feel bad that people like that are in those situations, but you can’t treat them like they are still minors or incapable of making their of choices in life. It’s a double edged sword for everyone involved.

I’m not trying to say that he didn’t defend a pedophile (he has), more like that specific mention wasn’t the best way to show it. Just wasn’t the best example and on its own, what he said was true. The relationship is wrong, it does make you feel gross to think about, but legally it’s fine. That’s a fact, as sad as it may be. Imo, the age gap and power imbalance that comes from that makes relationships like this INCREDIBLY immoral, and I can still look at the older involved person in disgust. But morality and law don’t go hand and hand as much as you’d think.

Killing people is illegal, not because it’s simply wrong to kill, but because you are objectively taking away that person’s right to live. You take away their agency, their human right to be alive, that’s why it’s illegal. It’s still wrong to kill, but if we were basing that law solely on that morality, then killing in self defense or from accident would be treated the same way as killing in cold blood. But legally, everything needs to be looked at from a logical perspective more than anything else so that the crime fits the punishment. Same thing can be applied to other crimes as well. Grooming on its own isn’t a crime, but sexual abuse is. Grooming is a cause for suspicion though

I already have to take a grain of salt with anything Saberspark says. That’s how it should be with any YouTube persona. Especially when it’s at a certain point in popularit, they say whatever gets them views lol.

[rosyandraw]

Hi Holly, ATKH it's been so amazing and i hope before it ends you cand give answers to my simple doubts...

Laurent´s family social status...(I understand that they weren't wealthy, maybe middle class, so why Uncle have a side scort business, he was wealthier than Aleron ?

What was Auguste career?...was he wealthy?...

Why he was an ass with Laurent...?

Hennike what kind of housewife...

why Aleron despice Laurent...

Why you are so insane good writter. You deserve the nobel price, the booker price

Anyway I'm from Latin-america and it is not easy for me to tell the hints you give about social class.

Thanks ins advance...

Hey!

Thank you so much, I am glad you're enjoying it!

And it's no worries lovely, I didn’t go into it too much to be honest. But yes, they’re all middle class, the uncle being wealthier by virtue of the fact he has no family to support and also is involved in a sex trafficking/exploitation ring.

The rest is mostly subtext and hints and whilst there is a bit more in the next chapter or so about the family I will tell you my thoughts anyway.

I imagined Aleron as something extremely boring tbh like accounting you know? For Auguste he is in business, I’d say marketing or advertising but I don’t really go into it.

Laurent and Auguste’s relationship is strained for a lot of reasons. Mostly Auguste lacks tact and empathy, he is the favoured child and he is entitled, selfish and immature.

I based him on a bunch of the idiots I used to work with, who were all far too old to act like the word “no” was new to them. The kind that never grew out of their “university/frat boy era and who act like the world owed them something.

They have a BIG age gap and Laurent spent a lot of time in his teenage years pushing everyone away. Auguste had moved out, had his life, there is a certain amount of resentment there. From both of them for their perceived differences. I always imagined Auguste, for example, would resent Laurents apparent IDGAF attitude, that Laurent is the better looking, that he’s younger and in his “Prime” whilst on some level Laurent resents all of the things about Auguste that “protected” him from their uncle.

It's nothing particularly deep, it’s just a sibling age gap with two incompatible people. Auguste is blunt but tactless, Laurent is sharp and insecure, Auguste throws tantrums and cuts with his words when he’s slighted… kind of like Laurent though it comes out a bit different.

They’re just siblings tbh, who grew up in a house subject to the abusive coersive control of Aleron.

Aleron’s feelings for Laurent are complicated. On one hand he sees Laurent as weak. He sees him as someone who should have known better, 14? Pfft he knew not to do that, he knew it was wrong, he must have wanted it (that kind of awful mentality) but he also sees Laurent and recognises his own failure and quite simply would rather pretend said failure did not exist.

With Hennike there is more from her next chapter so I won't say anything and let you make your own mind up 💕💕

[okwonyo]

yk i get where you're coming from... like you think the people who exposed the 12 year old should have kept quiet about it because the kid requested for her age to be a secret. i'd agree with you, if the kid was over the age of 14 or 15. but being 12, and lurking on tumblr and on nsfw blogs (even if she doesn't interact with nsfw works) is not safe for her. and before you ask me to stop acting like her mom, no i'm not bae. i'm just saying it's unsafe for her to be here at this age, knowing there's a lot of unfiltered stuff on here that she should not be exposed to at 12. more that that, many authors have revealed that they're not comfortable with a 12 year old interacting with even their sfw works, simply because she's too young. they hadn't put a "age <14 dni" because usually we don't see people less than the age of 14 here. but it is reasonable that they don't want her to interact with them because imagine writing about a makeout scene (no matter how innocent it is) and a literal child reading and interacting with it. idk it's just super weird. tbh, i don't blame the writers who exposed the kid. it's not like anyone's kicking her off tumblr. people who are fine with talking to 12 year olds are still going to interact with her. but it is very important to respect writers' boundaries too. and if she had been a reasonable age, then exposing her would have been bad. but the kid was hiding something that's literally going to make so many authors uncomfortable. so i think it's okay.

no, this is not my point at all. the thing is that, before even exposing her age on tumblr, they didn’t take the time to talk to her about it. they didn’t have discussion with her on how unsafe it was for her — just went on their account, exposed this little girl’s age (while making it seem like she was consuming nsfw which she doesn'’t, mind you), blocking her and making fun of her in their little group chat .. this, even after apologizing, and barely even taking responsibility for their actions (didn’t address the whole nsfw thing) is not alright. you talk to me about uncomfort; but do you think the kid was comfortable being exposed like that ? do you think her boundaries weren’t crossed when they exposed her age without any warning ? as i said, if the only people you think about protecting are people that are two days away from being adults against a child who barely entered middle school, then you are the problem. i’m not saying that being there at such a young age is fine — but we can’t control what she does, if she is there, we might as well try to protect her and talk to her in a civilized way. it’s all about respect and empathy, basic thinking skills and having a little bit of morals, the situation should have been handled better and i will forever stand by that. now, i’m done talking about this situation or trying to make you all understand what is the real problem because it keeps on making me upset.

[stupidrant]

i'm gonna be honest here, i just want to let it out there that i don't think it's entirely fair to judge thrud so harshly for being a product of her enviroment or her mistakes :( i can also point fingers at atreus for his poor decision making and acting out, but that would be stupid to do because he is after all a 14 year old kid. thrud is approximately same age as atreus and angrboda.

and i just realized just like jotunheim was angrboda's whole life and not being able to meet people her age, that's how it was for thrud while growing up in a toxic asgardian home with weird & down right mean family members. like whatever bullshit she saw and heard, all of it was a norm to her. we might not care, but the truth is that asgard was her entire world. her dad, however broken and unstable, was her entire world and wanted him to be better. and i would have had a problem if both dealt with their problems the same way or they were the same characters who showed grace, i greatly prefer them being on different ends of the spectrums so there's more room to develop their traits and arcs.

from thrud and sif's ending dialogues when they were sitting by the fire - i am sure that this is a kid who is going to shake off the ideology and propaganda they were raised with. she has to. because asgard is gone and she has to face reality in the other realms. and i don't doubt that sif the diplomat is going to keep her in check too!

(i am very sorry for the walls of text in your askbox but i find these discussions so fascinating and healthy, anyways i hope you're having a good day and what song are you listening to these days 💙💙💙 me personally i am in love with cowboy carter these days UGH I LOVE THE SONG TYRANT)

Im sure you know this anon but to anyone who might think otherwise i dont hate thrud so pls dont think that and i dont intend to start anything 😭 i agree she isnt a product of her family and i dont really put anything against her as she's just a kid hence why i think the most likely path she'd go is a self-reflection one rather than a self-deprecating one. Having differences is how atreus became friends with her, angrboda and skjoldr so heres to hoping for her and angie to be atleast acquaintances!

some additional comments about this too: i think the responses to thrud's character isnt completely because of her per-say, but more so because of the "fandom" (outside of here) and how she has a lot of weirdos on her (which isnt her fault either, shes just a character at the end of the day and a lot of those people do too much and it comes off as very disingenuous) and i think as time goes on, more people are gonna see through this and be a little turned off on her which is unfortunate because it should never be that serious and im not gonna let those people override my liking for her, im just pointing out how i see things and how dudebros fuck everything up in their paths. (since the year started i've been listening to more slower tempo songs tbh and i dont have any current favorites atm so imma just say sade - kiss of life for now lol)

[scullysstrapblog]

So far I’m on season two, but already I’ve got a list of things I’d do if I owned the legal rights to OUAT.

In no particular order; this is that list:

1. Make SwanQueen canon.

2. Have Cora put her heart back in so she can be the mom that Regina deserves. (Definitely have Regina and Cora go to therapy though.)

3. Tf was all that Peter Pan/Neverland business. I get that that’s where we got Henry realizing Regina was actually trying to be a better person and that her past shouldn’t define her future, but like it was a dumb ark. So I’m getting rid of that.

4. In place of the Neverland ark, we’d see Regina and Emma exploring their relationship, Regina and Cora mending theirs, Henry would stop being a little shit. Maybe there’d be something silly and Emma and Regina would share TLK?

5. Snow and Regina would actively try to understand each other, Regina would explain what being married to the soggy raisin was like and snow would see that Regina wasn’t evil she was just hurting.

6. I’d get rid of Neal somehow, like I personally think that a 200+ year old getting a 17 year old pregnant is creepy. Even if he wasn’t in triple digits, he would’ve been around 27 if the show is to be believed and that’s still statutory r*pe in my opinion. Like yeah I get Henry needs to be born but maybe figure out a way to keep him from trying to win Emma back? Like he fucked up big time so, he’d definitely have to go.

7. Hook’s gay. No elaboration. He’s gay. Fight me.

8. Honestly the blue fairy meddled in so much and from what I’ve seen she’s 100% evil. So she’d definitely have to go.

9. Rumple and belle, I know a lot of people like this ship but tbh, it’s kinda icky. Like there’s definitely a Stockholm Syndrome type of thing going on. Idk. Maybe Rumple and Hook can get it on? Belle can be with Mulan.

10. The whole, “Regina’s soulmate has a lion tattoo.” thing? Weird but people change, so I’d explore that but with Tink admitting that people’s soulmates can change as the person evolves.

11. Emma’s tattoo would definitely be explained. Because we all deserved that story.

12. Zelena saw how Cora treated Regina when Rumple showed her Regina’s life so I’d say that she wouldn’t have held any resentment towards Regina. I honestly think the writers could’ve made a much better storyline for them.

13. Another thing, why’d they just send Ruby away? Like, she’s such a great character and they just tossed her aside. They could’ve come up with something better. Especially if she was gonna just pop back up at random times.

14. The Robin/Zelena thing also gave me the ick. So that’s out. That shouldn’t have even been a thing.

15. I liked the time travel thing but if I made Zelena and Regina have a better relationship then that wouldn’t have existed so I’d have to find another villain to make it happen. BLUE!! She’d totally do it.

16. Emma would totally fall through the portal, regina would follow her because “Ms. Swan when will you stop being an idiot?!”

17. Maybe rather than being thrown into one point in time we could see Emma and Regina navigate through different points in their life while trying to keep blue from messing things up?

18. I’d have liked to see a bit more of Henry exploring his role as author. Maybe he’d write the stories properly rather than having a biased story that portrays things as black and white. Idk, I’d just like to see the stories get written as they should have been rather than the way Issac (was that his name?) wrote them.

19. Snow and charming would definitely apologize to Maleficent for taking her child and forcing her to take on Emma’s darkness. Maybe I’d show Emma and Lily finding a spell or something to balance themselves so they wouldn’t be so messed up.

20. Dark Swan ark would definitely happen but it would totally be explored the way it should’ve been. It was the “Dark Swan” ark not the “Pity me Hook and Dark Swan” ark.

Honestly this is all I’ve got so far, if you guys want more I’ll definitely add more but I have to get further along in the show because currently this is all I can remember.

And if you have some things you’d like to add to this list, please do! I would love to see what you all think!

[rainbowdaisy13]

When Taylor started touring, her parents took her out of regular schooling at Henderson High and her Mom homeschooled her through the Aaron Academy in Gallatin, Tennessee, which is a non-denominational Christian private school with a curriculum that revolves around religious education rather than secular education.

The reason why Taylor talks like a 16 year old girl and likes to read and then recommend books that are aimed at the 14-18 age demographic to her fans is because her parents ended pretty much permanently ended her secular education at that age and then spent the two years after that drilling the Bible into her head when they should've been teaching her English and Math and Science when they weren't using her as a work-horse to make themselves money.

To be fair, Taylor's pretty intelligent for someone whose entire high school education was hamstringed by her parents so severely, but the whole "Taylor parents stopped her secular education as a kid and did homeschooling that made the Bible the center of her entire universe" actually makes Taylor being so psychologically fucked up in way that she is make so much sense.

I don't hate Taylor for her being the way she is, I can't, I feel terrible for her because nobody should raise a child the way that she was raised, it was cruel and abusive and wrong and she was just a child who didn't deserve any of that or any of the psychological after effects that its caused her.

Now that she's an adult, she can learn to be different, and I can completely understand people giving her shit for not doing anything to change now that she's grown, but I can't hate her for growing into who she is now when nobody cared about her enough to stop her parents from breaking her and helping the entertainment industry break her even further when she was just a kid who had no power to stop any of it. It's just really bleak and heartbreaking tbh

Once you know better you do better. Child Taylor couldn’t save herself. Adult Taylor can but won’t

[sun-spark]

I have a very simple thought abut Theo/Brett + Liam, whether as a threesome or just one of them with Liam:

Theo - He and Liam would have a lot to work on, no doubt, and it wouldn’t be easy. But they’re both stubborn and love each other, so they’ get there come hell or high water. They have their emotional crises (particularly Theo) and they fight, but that’s how they work. They’ll settle after awhile. KEY: Their fights and crises revolve around them taking care of each other, even if that means fighting. The focus is healing.

Brett - I think it would be harder for Liam to adjust with Brett, and - honestly hopefully - for Brett to adjust too. (Boy should need some personal growth tbh). I’d expect just as many emotional crises and fights, though more verbal than physical ones. KEY: Trouble with Brett would mean Liam withdrawing and putting up walls.

Why?

Liam and Theo were practically inseparable - whether they liked it or not - during the ghost riders and again - much more happily - during the anukite. Theo did a sh*t ton of damage, but Liam was there.

- He saw a snapshot of the decade of torture and conditioning Theo went through when the Doctors took him and Hayden.

- He brought him back from Hell (and deals with Theo’s night terrors)

- Wether he knows what was in Theo’s hell or not, he witnessed first hand the effects it had/has.

- He and Theo were joined at the hip during the ghost riders, so he saw first hand Theo’s very quiet crisis of realizing he actually cares about someone else and wanting to keep them safe.

- They were together again during the anukite and Monroe mess. Theo kept him safe, grounded him, and kept others safe from him.

Liam witnessed and experienced first hand Theo changing and trying to be a better person. By the time they would have gotten together (late show/post-show) he would have been there for everything post-hell and post-doctors. There was a long process of Liam learning to trust Theo and Theo learning how to care.

This isn’t how it went down with Brett.

- Brett was the ringleader in actively kidnapping and abusing a freshman - a 14/15 year-old.

- The trauma he caused affects Liam similarly to the berserkers and it’s obvious from the zoo episode that Liam hasn’t worked through it.

- This abuse may be what triggered the massive flare of his IED that led to him destroying a car and being expelled.

- From the very first we see that Brett really has not changed since Liam switched schools and continues to taunt and try to hurt him.

- Brett does stop this behavior, but Liam wasn’t there.

Liam was not there to witness Brett change, however much or little that he did change. He never knows why Brett abuses him, he does not see Brett become a better person. While it seems that Liam does care about Brett during the Monroe storyline and is deeply wounded by his and Lori’s deaths (ret-con that in the case of a post-show relationship), Brett does not earn this in any way/does very little to earn this.

Liam witnessed Theo change and actively helped him learn how to care for someone.

Liam did NOT witness this with Brett.

So I think a relationship including Brett would lead to Brett accidentally triggering Liam’s trauma from the abuse he caused, several times. Maybe this would cause a lot of fights, but personally, I think Liam would shut himself off from Brett whenever it happened. He doesn’t want to hurt Brett, but dear f*cking g-d we saw what happened to Liam at the zoo. If it’s threesome, he would probably rely heavily on Theo for comfort instead of letting Brett try to help him.

[daz4i]

wait okay. instead of going to sleep like a normal person. here's how I'd change the ages in bsd (for those that have a canon age), bc no one looks their age/it makes the timeline feel weird, i wanna let at least some major past events breathe a little between one another. possibly controversial takes ahead:

atsushi: i like that he's 18 actually. he looks and feels 16 but no yeah 18 works better. I'd say 20-21 would be nice but that'd reallyyyy throw his backstory's timing off unfortunately

dazai: 25

kunikida: around 27-28

ranpo: 28 also, maybe even 29 (his whole thing is that he looks young for his age anyway)

yosano: 28 as well

tanizaki: like. he does look 18. but also 16 and 21 at the same time. i like him as a bit older than atsushi so let's say 19-20, and naomi as well while we're at it

kenji: why is he 14. it's not that he doesn't look 14 it's that i simply did not expect a child to be the muscle in a detective agency. so please make him like at least 16 which is only just slightly better tbh

kyouka: yeah 14 is chill in her case imo. makes her more tragic 👍

katai: 27-29ish as well

fukuzawa: at least in his 50s. maybe 55ish, or even more. he def looks like it and it fits more with having a son in his 20s

akutagawa: i do want him to be older. but making his age gap with atsushi bigger is weird. so keeping him as a 20 y/o it is, maybe 21 at most

chuuya: 25

kouyou: 30s. early 40s even. she is already so milf coded. finding out she's 26 in canon was straight up offensive i swear. come on.

higuchi: 21

tachihara: 22 or 23 maybe? (the hunting dogs don't have canon ages but i like jouno and tecchou as 26ish so that way he's still like the baby of the group)

hirotsu: how is that man 50. make him 65 at least. jfc. the whole point is he's been with the mafia a long time. ik they keep recruiting teenagers for some reason but give me a break. my dad is pushing 70 and looks younger than him

q: actually my issue with them isn't that they don't look their age (tho they do look a bit younger ig) but that timeline wise?? they're so weird?? why did the mafia have a 6 y/o on deck that's just inconvenient for all parties involved. like i can excuse kyouka at 11ish but come ON. at least make them 10 in fifteen. or just bring them in later bc i just realized the timeline doesn't line up with the dazai and chuuya changes otherwise. man idk

odasaku: girl that man was NOT 23 when he died he should've been like at least 27 then

mori: late 40s or early 50s. keep the few years gap from fukuzawa maybe but he should still be older

ango: 29ish in the current timeline. or even 32. idk why but that number feels right.

francis: 45 at least. how is a 32 y/o man supposed to have a daughter old enough to study abroad...

poe: 29

melville: actually he is the only one aged correctly in this entire manga. bestie 🔥🔥🔥🔥

steinbeck: 24. maybe even older

lucy: 20-21ish. same issue as akutagawa really

louisa: 25 at least please 🙏

nathaniel: 34 maybe.

margaret: also early 30s. how the fuck is she 20. like kouyou this is straight up insulting 😭

mark: ageless for he is the spirit of youth and joy (yeah 22 is chill for him actually. he's like the taylor swift song. he'd love that)

mushitaro: tbh I'd make him more around 29 or even older than 30. like he would be a believable 35 y/o to me if needed.

nikolai: actually him being 26 is chill too. tho i wouldn't mind making him around 28-29ish too since i already aged up most 26 y/os so may as well go all the way.

shibusawa: yeah he can stay 29 too idm. i actually didn't know he had a canon age until now. cool!

i think that's everyone who has a canon age (excluding lns bc i haven't gotten to them yet)? aside from sigma maybe but his age is more of a plot device than a fun fact. and fukuchi is implied to be the same age as fukuzawa so, yeah just make them the same in this case too.

i did mess up the timeline myself with this. so lemme clear it up:

The War and the whole thing with mori and yosano still happened when she was 11, so 17 years before canon. that means mori was still in his 20s back then, no big change

untold origins still happened when ranpo was in his teens, honestly we can keep it 14, so 14 years ago, meaning fukuzawa was in his late 30 or early 40s. again not too big of a change I'd say

fifteen happens when. well. dazai and chuuya are 15. ten years ago. i don't want q there get them out of my sight (for now) let them be a kid for a bit!!!!! but yeah like in canon that means the previous boss's murder was a year before, 11 years ago. also while we're at it, stormbringer is also the same aka a year after 15

now this is where we shake things up just a bit. rather than occuring when dazai is 18, i think we can push the dark era to when he's 20 and still maintain the whole childlike thing he has going on there, it's not that big of a difference imo.

that means, 5 years before canon instead of 4, making akutagawa 15 back then, and ango 27 like odasaku.

also yeah q comes in at some point in the middle between those^ I'd say close to dark era than fifteen.

originally i wanted to make skk 26 but this started stretching things even more. bc now we gotta figure out how long dazai spent in hiding. and ig we can keep it 2 years and just make it so his entrance exam was 3 years before canon. again imo not that big of a stretch 🤔

idk why i said this changes the timeline a lot i think this is p simple. also lets ppl stew in their situation for just a bit longer which i like more.

thank you for reading. you are very brave and strong for pulling through. feel free to disagree with my takes but just be nice about it please. I'm also open to hearing other takes if you have any that i didn't consider 🫡 but again just be nice okay?? 🥹

[sammygender]

12!

ask game

12: the unpopular character you actually really like and why everyone else should like them

sam obviously

i'm disconnected enough from mainstream fandom that i actually have no idea which characters are unpopular to them... i think amelia is pretty widely hated but i like her well enough especially as an arc for sam. i liked michael in s15 (and not a second before). him and adam's relationship was really fascinating they shouldve done more with it.

as for within my mutuals/samblr.... i honestly have no idea. i love the leviathans in s7 because i just think theyre fun but does that count as an unpopular character? sadly i am a hater to my core and there are far more popular characters i dislike a little....

OH wait i know. LATE SEASONS LUCIFER. everyone hates his ass and i will admit by s13 i was going Can somebody just rip up mark pellegrino's contract already (doubled in s14). but i actually really stand by him. smarter people than me have written better meta about this but there's just something so insidious about the way he acts in late seasons knowing hes inflicted irreperable torment and damage on sam.

like. ur century long abuser & torturer & rapist is always making edgelord dirtbag jokes and acting like a 14 year old with daddy issues and saying hes a virgin and hes awful obviously but hes awful in such a petty human way except hes Not. it lulls everyone into this false sense of security where they know lucifer's like, evil, but he's also just this annoying douche they work with sometimes, feels evil the same way your extremely right wing Young Conservatives make-me-a-sandwich coworker is kind of evil, and no one actually knows what happened in the Cage cause sam never talks to anyone about it, and i just think about how like........incredibly awful and isolating this mustve been for sam.

lucifer wont take anything seriously so how can anyone take Him seriously?? people complain about how hes a serious threat in like s5 and s7 and afterwards hes just a joke but i Like that. because he hasnt stopped being a serious threat hes just now petty, impulse-driven, apathetic, perpetually-teenage from the stunted growth of an ancient being in the Worst Possible Way. and hes still horrifically evil and sam is still incredibly terrified of him..

its just like! great to play around with! tfw your abusive ex is obviously a dick to everyone who meets him but he just kind of seems like a joke so no one can really take it all that seriously and now you just look kind of crazy for being this scared of him because tbh he seems too stupid to play the sort of psychological mind games he did and torment you that badly! sorry thats so interesting. then u add JACK into the mix? showstopping. astounding. jack Knows hes evil but like... thats just some guy. thats his dick dad who's kind of mean to sam. but like dean's his dick dad who's kind of mean to sam. shrug emoji.

anyway tldr i love late seasons lucifer. immortal deity adopting the aesthetics of evil (unfunny misogynstic white man). i dont know how this turned into a manifesto for him but. shrug emoji.