#...maybe associating neutral physical traits with bad actions is not a good thing

[taibhsearachd]

Hey, for real? Can we stop using "biting" to describe what Wilbur did to Shelby? Because I think "assault" is a much better word. She explicitly revoked her consent, and then he hurt her more. Wilbur assaulted Shelby.

The problem isn't the biting. That's a neutral action that can be loving, can be gentle, can be consented to.

He fucking assaulted her. There are memes about it because it apparently seems childish and funny, and it's not. She asked to stop being hurt and he did not stop.

[eternalwritess]

I think… It's time for romantic matchup? XD Hazbin Hotel, please. Sorry for the grammatical errors or/and misprints, if there are any, English is not my native language. May I ask to exclude Valentino, Adam, Lute and Niffty from the list?

Gender/pronouns: she/her, he/him, they/them (I am genderfluid. Thus, my preferred pronouns change)

Sexuality/preference: demisexual. I can be attracted to any gender, but maybe I prefer boys more

MBTI: INTP

Temperament: choleric-melancholic

DnD alignment: Chaotic-Neutral with Chaotic-Good tendency

Personality:

I often become the voice of reason in situations where everyone around is too emotional and acting impulsively. I also take a calm and thoughtful approach to problems and try to think about and analyze them neutrally and without unnecessary emotions. This quality helps me help someone find a solution to their problems, or at least support them emotionally. I have a high thirst for justice and I have a moderate empathy for others, and I can take action to help someone. I am careful not to open up to people right away, but study them well before doing so (although this has a negative side in the form of my extreme distrust, but I will write about this later). Despite my laziness, I can be full of inspiration and enthusiasm for things that interest me and very quickly learn something related to the subject of my interest, or direct my enthusiasm in a positive direction. I have a courage and independence, which I "charge" others with. I also have a sense of humor that my friends like (although some find it too vulgar). I am caring and attentive to those who are dear to me, and I try to act for their comfort. Loyalty to those I care about is also my strong point. I consider myself an optimist, but I also take into account the real facts.

People quite often really annoying me with their emotionality and a lot of different misconceptions that are in their minds (I deal with this very often, unfortunately). Against this background, I often look down on those around me, although I do not show it. This sounds a bit hypocritical against the background of the fact that irritability and short temper are also my traits that I (sometimes) find difficult to control. I have very big problems with trust, it's not easy for me to open up to others. I rarely show my real emotions, even to those with whom I am close, and try to appear calm. Another problem is my laziness and procrastination. I'm very sarcastic with people I don't like, or when I'm just in a very bad mood. I also have moments of low self-confidence. And finally, sometimes I get jealous. I have a fear of doing some things wrong combined with perfectionism, which may make me afraid to do something (for example, write a text) not well enough.

My life and mind are very chaotic - I have a habit of changing plans quickly, and for this reason I try not to make plans even for the next day.

My love languages: words of affirmation and physical touch. I can tell my mate a lot and often how much I love them, reminding them of this more often, I try to come up with pleasant affectionate nicknames, and I realy like praise them! I can compliment their positive traits to cheer them up and boost their self-esteem. Usually my affectionate nicknames are words that I associate with this person in a good way. I also often hug my mate and stroke them. I really like hugging. I have no problem with showing affection in public, and I even like to do it.

Hobbies: I am good at writing texts and composing stories, I like to come up with the plots of my stories and make their text pleasant to read. I also like to draw, but it's harder for me than writing. In drawing, I prefer to use a technique, that is, a drawing tablet with a screen, rather than paper and pencils. I also like to spend time playing video games and reading books or watching some movies and anime (my favorite genres are related to fantasy and science fiction... And when it comes to video games, I prefer RPG). I also like to study things related to my interests - astronomy, psychology, birds, reptiles.

Pet peeves: Well, I think the full list of such things would be too long… So here are some that I managed to remember. All of them are somehow related to the invasion of my personal space (for example, when someone stares at the screen of my phone or laptop and comments on what is there) without my permission. I also don't like being distracted from something I'm very focused on (for example, when I'm writing a text, and it's at this moment that someone suddenly wants to chat with me for no important reason). I am also annoyed by people who believe that they know everything and cannot make mistakes, and will never admit their mistakes.

Other facts: I have a fickle and confused sleep schedule (sometimes I sleep more than 16 hours, sometimes less than 4 hours, because I have short insomnia). Perhaps I have autism (at least self-diagnosis and self-observation have shown this). I don't understand social cues and hints well, and it's better for other people to tell me about their feelings directly (however, I can learn to understand how a person feels if I study their character well).

𝕐𝕠𝕦 𝕙𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕓𝕖𝕖𝕟 𝕞𝕒𝕥𝕔𝕙𝕖𝕕 𝕨𝕚𝕥𝕙…

𝓥𝓸𝔁!

How you met? Yeah idk just go with it :)

Your voice of reason is much needed. I know how sometimes it seems like Vox is the voice of reason in the V's but uh... yeah no when Alastor gets involved he'll get straight up petty

Keep him in check will ya?

You being calm and analytical probably attracted him. He probably found it hot or smth-

"So how are you gonna deal with this one sweetie?"

Once he realized your thirst for justice he immediately kept you away from Val and Velvette knowing that you wouldn't like them all too much

Vulgar humor? Yeah he wouldn't mind. He'd join in

Once Vox realized you were studying him he probably found it fun, like a game and it reminded him of Alastor

"You've got your eye on me don't you?"

Contrary to popular belief I don't think that Vox is too emotional. He has a tech boy vibe about him and doesn't tend to be overly emotional. He has his more pitiful moments sure but honestly he's not as bad as some other characters

As for looking down on people... he needs an ego check. Go crazy

this is all im gonna do sorry-

[katsidhe]

what is the difference between ... coded and ... girl?(for example dean coded sam girl vs. sam coded dean girl?)i'm kinda confused

So a couple of people have asked me something along these lines, which gives me an excuse to go off on a rant about I interpret the “x-coded y girl” lens. My One True Lens. My OTL, as it were.

The notion of coding, linguistically, is all about communication. Literature, being a medium of both art and communication, relies on a shared culture of meaning. At its most basic sense, coding is just sets of symbols laid down by an author that are governed by certain rules, which permit a reader to infer meaning based on their mutual prior understanding on how these rules work. There are many, many types of code in literature. There’s linguistic coding, as in which denotations and connotations are ascribed to which words. There’s grammatical coding, as in what sentence structures imply about the subjects they describe. There’s the literary code of tropes, used to quickly convey eg which character is the ingenue, the hero, etc. There are structural and genre codes—for example, the generic forms of tragedy, or comedy, or parody, all of which are signaled to a reader with tropes and words and packaging meant to interact with their expectations. And of course, there are character codes. A character introduced wearing a leather jacket, in most forms of Western fiction, is being coded with “toughness”. It’s a trope, it’s a meme, it’s a code. This coding is a supralingual form of communication that relies on shared cultural semantics.

To say someone or something is “x-coded”, then, is to say that they, either through deliberate self-presentation or intrinsic characterization, communicate “x”. Maybe they associate themself with tropes that x is associated. Maybe they don’t think much like x, but they act in a way that x acts, or vice versa. Maybe they have some undefinable energy that somehow screams x, in a way that would be apparent to most audiences. Basically, how would this person or concept be written about in a book in shorthand in order to convey to the audience what character tropes we should assign them? This can be a combination of internal and external traits, as long as those traits are actively communicated in some fashion.

“-Girl”, gender neutral, is all about fandom. “Fangirl” is often a diminutive meant to characterize especially female fans as obsessive, childish, or altogether too excited about a niche interest. “Y girl”, then, is a term meant to reclaim and celebrate the act of whole-heartedly embracing fannish enthusiasm without compunction or embarrassment. But in the necessary abstraction of x-coded y girl framing, that doesn’t mean that you have to be a huge fan of “y” in particular. Rather, someone or something who is a y girl is a fan of the traits encoded by y. “Y” is often but not always aspirational: maybe y isn’t how you think or act, but it’s how you’d like to think or act. Maybe y isn’t how you’d like to be, but you deeply admire y. Maybe you don’t even necessarily WANT to value y, but you do, and your life or actions are shaped by those values. “Y girl” is about guiding lights, things we are drawn to, things we assign value to, things we secretly relish, things we can’t put down.

A Dean-coded Sam girl communicates themself with Dean tropes, but is drawn to Sam tropes, whereas the opposite is true for a Sam-coded Dean girl. I’ll give some straightforward character examples.

Ruby is Dean-coded: the toughness, the leather, the stubborn absolutism of believing she’s in the right, the charisma, the devil-may-care persona studded with moments of emotional vulnerability. Some of those tropes are internal, some external, some physical, some not, but they’re all about communication. Ruby is a Sam girl: she is ruthlessly, brutally focused on the big picture; she is more than willing to personally sacrifice pieces of herself to get to her endgame; the costs and the morality of what she’ll do to get there are completely irrelevant to the greater good. She is self-contained and internal; she doesn’t value loyalty or personal love or external reward or even some far off aspirational moral good: she wants the world shaped a certain way, and if she succeeds then nothing else matters. These are Sam-associated values. (Not to be confused with Sam-the-character’s values.)

Harry Potter is Sam-coded. He’s the hashtag chosen one; his life is studded with abuse and trauma; he was scarred with a personal connection with an evil wizard as a baby; he grapples with expectations, stigma, and fear from people around him based on that connection to evil; he’s pretty bad at controlling the narrative of his life. But he’s definitely not a Sam girl. He’s a Dean girl through and through: he thinks first asks questions never, signifying how he values courage and loyalty above effectiveness. He would never compromise himself morally for the sake of his goals, he’d never sacrifice a friend. He values personal love and emotional connections above anything else, including the world and the greater good.

The wonderful thing about my OTL is that it can classify anything, as anything. Simply come up with three to four thematically linked nouns, and start putting people and ideas and concepts into the appropriate boxes. For instance, from {beer wine liquor}, I am a wine-coded liquor girl.

[fe-semi-decent-scenarios]

oooh could you do protective headcanons for the golden deer too??🥺

{I most certainly can. Y’all know I love these tropes so keep ‘em coming. Hope it’s to your liking! :3}

Claude: 

6/10

Neutral, with just a tad bit of nerves. 

Look. Claude has bigger fish to fry than what you’re gallivanting on about during the day. The man has a dream to catch with literally a country and 1/3 (woot woot alliance) on his shoulders. 

First, the future. Then, you. Can’t have a life together if there is no place for it to be had, yeah? 

This doesn’t mean that he never worries about you. Quite the contrary, if he begins then he can’t stop. So he doesn’t tinker the thought. 

Instead he has his most trusted allies at your back. During the Academy days you were left under Hilda’s watchful eye, and during the war you are always nearby (courtesy of matchmaker Prof.Byleth) 

Once he puts a ring on it you’ll have guards. No problem. 

He also trusts your own capabilities. One doesn’t train every day to walk out with nothing  

Also

You make me laugh if you think Claude believes you’ll ever cheat on him 

Not that he’s cocky okay, maybe a bit  but no one would dare put the moves on “The Master Tactician’s” s/o

Any suitor coming your way is peasant fodder. If not to him, than to your own personal retaliation. 

Yupp, nothing to worry about. You’ve got it covered. He’ll only step in if you physically come ask him 

and with a bit of teasing he’ll comply 

However, Claude is very sensitive to illness for obvious reasons. This is why he’s listed at a six. He always insists on tasting your food

It was a gimmick at first, and in the beginning he’d make banter to sneak a bite while you remain all unknowing of his true intentions 

He’ll be damned if someone ever poisons you. They won’t ever get the chance

Ignatz: 

9/10

Let us face it. Iggy is a worry-wart.

He freaks out over the most minuscule of situations. The poor lad nearly gets a heart attack at least once a day 

And no, i’m not just referring to his pre-timeskip self. Ignatz may have grown a head taller, got a backbone, fancy harem artist pants--but no, he did not lose his inner anxious zealot. That trait will cling until the day he dies sadly 

Having you at his side only makes things worse (in a good way. The trouble is worth it to him) 

Especially if you’re more of the risky sort. Expect him to mother hen if you cause ruckus around the monastery. He can and will lecture you to death (only to apologize and hide away after)

Now not only does he worry about his own issues, but also yours. I swear Ignatz acts like you are his second being. If someone scolds you, hurts you, etc. he acts like they did it to him 

Can be a bit dramatic, not gonna lie. He gets so worked up that his ears go red. Like, you can just t e l l he’s holding so much back because he doesn’t want to go too far

Don’t even get me started on if someone tries to make a move on you 

He becomes t o r n. It isn’t his place to tell you who to hang around, but ohmygodwhatifyourealizeheisn’tgoodenough 

iggy no, bad iggy. don’t think like that

He feels threatened so easily and not many would peg him the jealous type. He is, but hides it very well. 

If need be he will talk out his feelings with you. That’s something noteworthy of Ignatz: he uses his words. He may find communicating such thoughts aloud difficult, but if he truly is concerned then he will be honest with you.  

Raphael: 

10/10

Raphael believes in trust. He expects you to be honest and to not keep anything important secret. In return he’ll do the same. 

This is why he doesn’t care if someone is flirting. He could give less of a thought on gossip, rumors, or anything really. That effort can go towards training 

He truly, honest to Sothis, trusts you with all his heart. There isn’t any time to spend doing otherwise. Raph just wants to live happily and that means having you by his side 

Nor does he feel intimidated by anyone else either. I’m not saying that he reeks of resolved confidence, but Raph believes that you love him. Love topples any mindless flirting that other people throw your way 

but let’s get one thing straight 

If anybody, and I mean ANYBODY, tries to hurt you 

This guy’s having them for b r e a k f a s t. Pounded, sliced, and Smoked. The same way he liked his bacon. 

You are his family. Raphael protects his family, and those he cares about. 

You will never be alone. Goddess if you cry and someone else is the cause then he will take action. One fault of Raph is that while he’s a sweetie, he doesn’t think before acting a lot. Similar to Caspar, he just goes for it 

It takes a lot to get underneath Raph’s skin. 

In short: do not f*ck with his loved ones. He would take on Nemisis himself mono-e-mono if it meant protecting them 

Lorenz: 

8/10

Y’all going to sit there and try to convince me that Lorenz Hellman Gloucester doesn’t try to establish dominance? 

Key word: try

He’s quickly shut down

“Lorenz if you tell one more person that we’re betrothed, I swear that I’ll shave off your eyebrows” - You, one month post-confession 

Saying that you’re his perfect match is no excuse. Considering all the preaching he does on noble humility, you’d think he would want your private affairs off the notice board? 

It doesn’t take long for your peers to start complaining. Claude finds his behavior entertaining, but not a day goes by that someone doesn’t beg you to make him shut up 

Lorenz is also a bit old fashioned. He doesn’t like the idea of you fighting more than necessary

Once again, shut down 

Best way to deal with Lorenz is to let him think he has his way, then just do whatever. He gets upset, pouts, spouts his normal lecture, but then relents. All in due process with him 

Never thought I’d say this, but perhaps requesting not to be in the same troop together is the best option? You’d think he would fight better with an S tier relationship at his side? Nahhh. HE TAKES YOUR KILLS IT IS NOT FAIR 

He gives too much attention to what you’re doing, and not the enemy. Best if you stay separated

Ugh pray no one hits on you in front of him. Just... *screams* I don’t think anyone will, just to avoid him getting defensive. I swear the other deer take extensive preventative measures to avoid it.  

Hilda:

6/10

C’mon. This is Hilda we’re talking about 

You two most likely grew closer because she “asks” you for help so often 

Just like Claude, she has bigger fish to fry. The last type of person she wants to be is Holst (she loves him though don’t misinterpret that)

She does worry though 

Not enough to make her take the front lines, but a smidgen. Just to where you’ll get periodic check in’s 

Nothing obvious. A simple “what’s going on?”  as she inquired about your well-being 

A precarious scan-over as she checks for any new scars

She does get jealous though. There’s an entire castle full of available people and someone chooses to flirt with you? 

That just doesn’t make sense. Perhaps the “once something is taken it becomes more desirable,” saying has some truth 

She’s quite the clinger. You’ll just be walking and suddenly, BOOM, bubble-gum pink arm-candy in the corner of your vision

Once you two bypass the ‘puppy-love’ early stages, she changes. 

Despite her negligence beforehand, she does become overprotective   

Will fight if needed. Say you have a paralogue? Just so happens she was nearby and wants to tag along 

She also has to protect you from Holst. My dear, you cannot do that yourself. Brotherly wrath beseeches you, my god. Run dude run 

Marianne: 

3/10

A possessive streak is nonexistent in her blood. Such thing is a personal fear of her’s. Marianne refuses to conform to the stereotypes associated with her crest 

However, she does believe that one day you may leave her side. Marianne isn’t the most confident person. She...doubts 

Often does she wonder if you’re there solely to make her hurt. To love her and then one day disappear without a trace 

Anxieties like so will not go away overnight. She will not seek reassurance, which makes her more uncommunicative than most partners 

but no one is perfect. Neither are you. All you personally can do is politely decline any advances, and do your best to let Marianne know that you love her 

She isn’t particularly protective in any other sense either. She’ll heal you if needed, but special attention isn’t there

Marianne treats being a healer like how an ER doctor operates. On the field, everyone is equal. She is needed everywhere and cannot stay by your side. Otherwise lives will be lost, and that won’t be good for her conscience.

The same goes for all other aspects. If you’re gone, then you’re gone. If you’re sick, then you’re sick. She cannot give you special attention and acts in accordance to severity of the situation. Patients cannot be weighed in value via personal bias 

She has a surprisingly strong sense of self control, let me tell ya.

Lysithea:

7/10

She...does not have much time. Entering a romantic relationship was not a possibility that crossed her mind once before you 

Why bother when the ending is certain? Why leave someone brokenhearted, or a widow? Why give herself that extra stress when she’s already under so much as it is?

You can’t blame her for being extra cautious. While her life may be hanging on a string, that doesn’t mean yours has to end 

After some time she develops a resolve. If needed she would gladly lay her life down if it meant you could live another day 

A problematic conclusion. You two will argue often over how she cannot trade a ‘life for a life,’ just because of her special circumstances. Her mind always enforces that it’s the logical decision, and has trouble recognizing her own value

I suppose that comes with being a know-it-all, huh? Once her mind is set then there is no changing it 

Despite her brain sending all the signals that acting on jealousy is wrong...well, we know Lysithea 

She won’t come out and say she gets protective for your sake. Apparently anyone flirting with you already had business with her

Business that miraculously unfolds once you leave. Then suddenly they no longer have an interest? 

What’d she do? Threaten to shove a thoron up their rectum? No one knows 

Leonie: 

9/10 

She is the mom who’d create a strict morning routine for her kids to follow before school 

Or a thorough itinerary on a vacation 

Not a moment or bullion to be wasted! 

Cannot express enough how much this girl cares. She can become annoying from all the interference, but you’ll never become a bum with her in your life 

You might want to ask her to butt out. Remind her that you’re not one of the kids from her village, and that you can handle yourself 

Sometimes you’ll joke and say “yes mom,” because she gets b o s s y 

Which will earn you either: a) a glare, or b) her playing along and confusing everyone else 

So in a sense, yeah she’s protective. Overbearing in her own Leonie way 

Not the jealous type. Leonie doesn’t look at what other people have, and instead focuses on her own life. If someone wants to shamelessly throw themselves at your feet then that’s their issue. You know better than to cheat on her 

I can see her complaining to the captain or to Byleth though. Why waste time when the issue can easily be solved? Obviously someone with the time to flirt has time to do training drills  

Bonus! Cyril: (because during my first play-through I kept expecting GD to take him under their wing. They did not, and Nintendo missed out.) 

5/10

He personally hates being treated like a child. When someone doesn’t take him seriously Cyril’s self restraint goes b o o m 

So he won’t do that to you. You’re a capable individual and that’s that. Nothing more for him to interfere with 

His only protective streak lies when you’re incapable of doing things yourself. Aka: injured, ill, resting, etc. 

He’ll nag you for not being careful, but it’s not hard to miss the tears pricking his eyes 

He’s also very perceptive towards break-in’s. Many people have tried to kidnap/assassinate people of higher standing. He’s witnessed many attempts towards lady Rhea. I see him taking night shifts for patrol often, and after the war the habit sticks with him.

He takes a lot onto his shoulders often. It’s not bad. Being dedicated is an admirable trait, yet if you’re down someone will have to stop him from picking up the slack. 

He’s no healer, and leaves that job to the professionals. However he doesn’t want anyone to disturb you with the work your missing. So he’ll do it in your stead 

Manuela lets him stay in the infirmary past visitation hours. Mostly because he’s so busy during the day that he can’t come by 

He won’t return to his room those nights. He prefers to be by your side, just in case. 

Other than this type of situation- no, he’s not protective in the slightest.  

[caseyah]

.flow

I just finished playing through .flow, so I think I’ll try to give my full thoughts and interpretations on a lot of I found and experienced in the game (in the form of a series of points, because my thoughts are scattered even at the best of times).

for now I will be just be tackling characters roughly in order of how relevant I believe them to be to Sabitsuki’s life and experiences, while I will talk about Sabitsuki (and, by extension, Rust) at a later time.

CHARACTERS: 

Black-Haired Girl / Onigo: Sabitsuki’s life began with a death. Specifically, the death of her mother. Onigo represents the very few things Sabitsuki both remembers about her mother (her distinctive long black hair and blue dress) and what she was told by the hospital staff (the fact that she died giving birth to Sabitsuki). The reason why she dies so often in the game itself (childbirth event, every time you encounter her as Rust) is because thats all Sabitsuki can relate her with. Sabitsuki also likely feels guilt in relation to "causing” her mother’s death, as she manifests the idea in the form of the incredibly visceral Childbirth Event. 

Oreko: Sabitsuki’s childhood friend, another child who either “lived” in the hospital like Sabitsuki or simply another kid who met Sabitsuki during a time she was in the hospital. Oreko would grow interested in technology and machines as she grew older, eventually becoming something of a mechanic/scientist (though Sabitsuki likely never exactly understood what Oreko’s machines were, which is probably was she internalized them as looking quite bizarre and scary). She also likely had a very big interest in the seas, explaining why she wears the divers helmet and why Sabitsuki associates her with the ocean. Oreko was Sabitsuki’s only companion in any sense throughout the majority of her life, someone who was there for Sabitsuki no matter how much abuse Sabi sustained from society or no matter how bad Sabi’s illness got. Unfortunately, Oreko’s life would eventually be cut short. Sabitsuki most likely never figured out how her best friend perished and was likely in denial about it for some time before making peace with it (Finding Oreko’s ghost requires interacting with her “alive” self a decent amount, and the area her specter is found in is relatively calm compared to most other areas containing significant characters). Oreko’s final appearance to Rust in deadhole could be the last remaining shred of “normal” Sabitsuki having one last memory of her best friend, before she disappears and only Rust remains.

School Girl/Kaibutsu Sabitsuki: Sabitsuki’s manifestation of what she once was/fears she could become again, the one who was harmed by and later took revenge on Smile and the one Sabitsuki is always running from to some extent. School was likely a very, very bad time for Sabitsuki on a personal level, possibly due to Oreko’s death (though there isn’t anything that really indicates when Oreko’s death happened in relation to Sabitsuki’s life so it could be for any currently unknown reason). Kaibutsu Sabitsuki is what Sabitsuki remembers herself as during that time: a violent monster who hurt the only person Sabitsuki was even remotely close to at the time.

Smile: Though Smile is obviously a very significant person in Sabitsuki’s life, exactly what their relationship was and Smile’s history in general is very vague. His appearance in Disposal is likely a representation of his first meeting with Sabitsuki, as he isn’t wearing his usual outfit and lacks his tattoos (their appearance while as Rust may just be because Rust always sees Smile as his “true” self) and seems to react to Sabitsuki’s presence with mild confusion more then anything else. They later met properly during school, where by this point Smile had gained his tattoos and they obviously had formed a relationship of some sort (whether it was just an acquaintanceship, a friendship, or something more significant isn’t exactly clear but Smile was at least comfortable enough around Sabitsuki to have her visit his house and meet his sister). Unfortunately, their ambiguous relationship didn’t last. Sabitsuki’s corrupted school event shows what I believe is likely the end of their relationship and the last time they ever interacted with eachother. For one reason or another, and I suspect the cause was likely Sabitsuki herself, Smile attacked Sabi in the basement of the school. On a personal level, Sabitsuki likely viewed this as an injustice against herself (even if Smile was likely only doing what had to be done) which is why Rust later imagines herself getting revenge against the boy.

The Cleaners: The Cleaners are people who “clean up” (i.e. kill) those with the illness Sabitsuki suffers from. At some point in the past, they massacred the residents of the hospital Sabitsuki was staying in (as seen in 0.16) but left her alive for whatever reason, taking her away to live an actual life beyond the hospital walls. Why they spared Sabitsuki specifically isn’t something I can explain really, but its possible she was simply much less far along in her illness compared to the others and had the potential to be “saved”. Sabitsuki likely doesn’t view the Cleaners as a threat or “enemies” as it were and rather seems fairly neutral about them despite understanding what they do on some level (as seen by obtaining the limbless effect from one’s chainsaw). The Cleaners also had a second purpose asides from their main directive: working at the Sugar Hole (or whatever its “real” equivalent may be). Given Sabitsuki’s fondness of the place (it being one of very few areas in .flow that aren’t directly threatening or foreboding in some way), its possible The Cleaners brought her to the Sugar Hole shortly after leaving the Hospital with Sabi.

The Girl In The Yellow Dress: Buried far in Sabitsuki’s subconscious are the few memories focused on a mysterious girl known only for her faded, dirty yellow dress. Though not strictly always buried far beneath (being seen in Deterioration very easily while smoking in the hall) and never reacting to Sabi’s presence, she is clearly someone Sabitsuki lost tragically and has done her best to bury all the remaining memories of. So, who is this girl? Though my theory is abit shakier thanks to just how vague a character she is, I believe the Yellow Dress Girl to have been a sex worker who briefly acted as Sabitsuki’s caretaker before she somehow met her end. Maybe through knowing the Cleaners somehow or just being in the right place at the right time, this girl ended up as the guardian to a young Sabitsuki. Working as a prostitute (either already her job or something she took up to support Sabitsuki), the young Sabitsuki grew to genuinely appreciate this girl as a motherly figure and they briefly shared a legitimately nice life together (as seen in the “sugar float days” event). However, it didn’t last, and thanks to the darker side of her job creeping up and taking over her life, the Yellow Dress Girl ended up separated from Sabitsuki and possibly even dead. Sabitsuki, unable to properly deal with the trauma of losing someone who did so much for her and she held so dearly, repressed the memories of her and pushed the Yellow Dress Girl into the furthest points of her mind, where memories of the good times were fleeting and brief while memories of the end lingered unchanging.

Little Sabitsuki: Little Sabitsuki is fairly self-explanatory: she represents how Sabitsuki remembers herself as a child, either weak and bedridden (hospital), or lost and forgotten (snow world). Little Sabi’s condition worsening as regular Sabitsuki’s does could represent just how sick Sabi truly believes she is, unable to see even her past self as anything but diseased and broken. Sabitsuki never got to experience a “proper” childhood, she has no memories beyond the hospital, the overgrown halls, and the cold.

The Inner Demon: Underneath it all, this is how Sabitsuki truly sees herself. A bloody, diseased demon who exists only to cause suffering to both the world and people around her, aswell as her self. A manifestation of all of Sabitsuki’s sins and wrongdoings in the form of a dark mirror, buried so far deep within Sabitsuki’s subconscious the idea of confronting it leads Sabi to vomit her own blood in anxiety and terror. Only once Sabitsuki sheds her sense of self and becomes Rust can she properly confront her demon. The years and years of self-loathing building up from her birth, to her disease, to the loss of her friends, to the loss of control, to the loss of her self, leads Rust to perform a metaphorical suicide as she beats the demon to death as the final action taken in her own subconscious.

Kaibutsu: What Sabitsuki fears she will become should her illness completely take over. They take the form of grown-up versions of her fellow children at the hospital, possibly meaning that she believes all of them would be doomed to become a Kaibutsu, or perhaps that she saw multiple children become Kaibutsu at the hospital.

Fetuses: Sabitsuki’s physical manifestation of her illness, only appearing by the time Rust takes over (as while Sabitsuki rejects and is terrified of the illness, Rust embraces it).

Takibi-san: A homeless girl Sabitsuki spent a small amount of time around after leaving the hospital. Sabi mostly remembers her thanks to Takibi’s distinctive pink hair, a very uncommon trait in .flow’s world.

While this is all for now, I do plan to do a similar analysis for Sabitsuki and Rust. If that goes well enough and I still feel up to it afterwards, I will do another two analysises for the maps and the effects.

[modernlcve]

*  —  stats —   tatum cohen !

* — basics !

full name:   tatum mackenzie cohen. nickname(s):   her dad called her Tatum Tot and yeah she hated it but. what can u do age:   twenty. date of birth:   january fifth. place of birth:   carina bay,    north carolina. gender:   female. pronouns:   she / her. sexual orientation:   lesbian. level of education:   high school graduate. pursuing a degree in geology + geography.

* — physical !

tattoos:  none. piercings:   ears pierced once. notable features:   she’s bleached her hair to feel alive if even for a fleeting moment. weakness(es):   half gremlin. scar(s):   none.

* — domestic !

occupation:   student.   waitress. residence:  she stills lives at home. social class:   idk i should ask but . parents:   she shares a mom with the rhodes siblings,   i feel like we’ve Covered her story.   her dad,   dave cohen,  lives in charlotte and hasn’t been in carina for a hot minute. siblings:   the whole gang.  in addition,   her dad has two kids with his wife,   another two half brothers,   ethan and mason, middle schoolers she frankly can’t connect with. extended family:   yeah this is one i could consult for but i feel like if there’s any discernible family she probably avoids them too.

* — personality !

positive traits:   disciplined.   resourceful.   sincere. negative traits:   jaded.   harsh.   reclusive. myers-briggs ( x ):   istj;   the logistician. temperament:   choleric. moral alignment:   neutral good. horoscope:  capricorn,   the sea goat. hogwarts house:  slytherin.

* — favorites !

movie:   donnie darko. tv show:   true detective. book:   frankenstein by mary shelley. drink:   blue powerade. food:   literally any pasta. animal:   seals. color:   olive green. song:   piece of my heart by janis joplin. artist:   haim. celebrity crush:   rosario dawson.

* — impressions !

first impression:  she’s defensive.   she knows her family has a reputation,   she knows she has a reputation.   she knows that all proceeds her,   and she tries to assert herself beyond all that right from the get go.   its why she comes off as an asshole   ( asides from her just being an asshole ). self impression:   she genuinely does have a superiority complex over a lot of people In Town.   she thinks she’s smart and capable and will be able to handle herself when she’s finally out,   but first she’s just got to get out. lover impression:   no clue.   she’s really in a place where she’s not Mature enough to have a real relationship.   just messing around she could probably handle,   but she’s  too selfish to actually be a Partner to someone.

* — et cetera !

turn ons:   quick wits,   ambition.   intelligence. turn offs:   if she deems you Vapid you’re Out. drink/drugs/smoke:   yes/no/no. dominant hand:   right. clean or messy:   clean. early bird or night owl:   night owl. hobbies or special talents:   she can do a back handspring.

* — QUESTIONNAIRE !

01. where was your character born? what brought them to carina? what do they like most about the town?

tatum was born in carina.   she doesn’t want to stay,   but she’s sticking around for the time being,   while she finishes her degree.   the biggest perk at this point is living this close to the beach:   she’s not a complete monster,   she likes spending afternoons out by the ocean and taking long reflective walks around to Center herself.

02. who are your character’s friends and family? who do they surround themselves with? who are the people your character is closest to?

we know the Situation w/ her moms part of the family.   of everyone there,   i think she considers herself closest to bristol,   she grew up really admiring her even if she was too big of a bitch to actually let her actions and words reflect that.    when she was little,   she saw her dad at least monthly for a good while,   but when she was twelve,   he got married,   and started a family with his life.   tatum became an afterthought and it’s just another thing on the long list of reasons she’s permanently pissed off.   she’s probably got friends but they’re pretentious and mean like her.

03. what is your character’s biggest fear? who have they told this to? who would they never tell this to? why?

tatum’s biggest fear is that getting out of carina won’t magically make her life better.   she worries that no matter where she is,   maybe she’s just not likable or something,   or that she’ll continue to fall into situations where she makes reasons for people to talk about her behind her back.   she wants everything to fall into place after she moves away,   but she has the lingering fear that it won’t be that easy.   she hasn’t told his to anyone.

04. has your character ever been in love? had a broken heart?

tatum’s love life is virtually nonexistent.   she’s never dated,   never been the type to just fool around.   she’s had crushes,   the big wistful kind,   but she’s too big of a debbie downer to ever act on them and too big of a negative nancy for any girl to have realized she was into them long enough to make the first move.   it’s just not her top priority right now.   she’ll settle for admiring girls from afar until she can get out of carina and do dating right.

her dad did break her heart a little though.

06. it’s saturday at noon. what is your character doing? give details.

she’s holed up in the library,   either studying or just fucking around on the world wide web.   she prefers posting up there for the day than hanging around the house,   she finds it easier to focus or get a moment of silence to her fucking self if she’s there,   or maybe loitering around a coffee shop.

07. what is one strong memory that has stuck with your character since childhood?

she genuinely does have fond memories of her big wild family.   she doesn’t completely want them to choke.   she remembers a dumb family backyard camping trip they went on when she was a kid.   like most of her fond memories with her family,   it was isolated from the town,   a time when what everyone else in town thought didn’t matter,   what mattered was who could tell the best scary story and bristol making sure nobody got 2 close 2 the fire when they made smores.  

09. what is something that upsets your character? where do they go when they’re upset?

tatum is literally always upset.   ol’ gal is an ace at finding something to bitch about do NOT underestimate her.   as i’ve beat over ur head multiple times by now,   she’s very preoccupied with reputation and people judging her unfairly.   when she’s upset,   she goes to the pier and fucks around a little,   or,   she goes to the library to simply power thru.   she just doesn’t have the energy to really address every time shes upset.   if she did,   she’d never get anything done.

10. when your character thinks of their childhood kitchen, what smell do they associate with it? why?

whatever bristol’s go 2 meal was.   while tatum got to be around for More of her mom’s good years than the older kids,   she’s still just perfectly nestled in the middle enough to remember the bad times too.   its one of the reasons bristol is the only motherfucker out here worth Respect.

[pudgy-puk]

What's your beef with Hraesvelgr? I'm not trying to call you out; I'm just curious.

oh boy this will probably get long (and as i said in the previous post, this is not prescriptive to anyone else, just descriptive of what i think about the character and why)

the thing with hraesvelgr is that he’s a Bad Elf.

by which i mean, hraesvelgr has all the traits of the kind of high fantasy elves that people utterly despise, presented in that same infuriating “they’re the Best and you can’t disagree with them” way. he is a character who is and who must be so perfect, perfectly tragic and perfectly beautiful, that he distorts the characterization of anyone and anything who gets too close to him in order to preserve how perfect, tragic, beautiful, noble and right he is.

he distorts other characters from his first mention, in fact—when ysayle explains that she will take the protagonist party (at that point consisting of the warrior of light, estinien, and alphinaud) to see hraesvelgr, to treat with hraesvelgr, and gives us the story of hraesvelgr and saint shiva as background. including the detail that hraesvelgr ate shiva, and this was regarded as an event that brought peace between discontented men and dragons before thordan et al. fucked it up again with ratatoskr. she says this at our literal first meeting on guardedly-friendly terms. there is no physical evidence, textual evidence, to support her claim. we are still in coerthas and have yet to see even dravania, let alone the churning mists. it has been established previously that militant heretics are willing to lie and lie quite well (cf. the one who killed and stole the identity of an inquisitor in order to kill people in 2.0 msq). the only reason to choose to believe her is to CHOOSE to. and alphinaud, who at the time recently had been badly burned by choosing to trust the wrong people (ilberd, lolorito), and who even through present content, through 4.0 and 4.1, continues to be deeply affected by that betrayal, chooses to believe her with little skepticism, even the part about dragon-eats-gf-is-a-moral-good. estinien chooses to accept her story with very little challenge—estinien, azure dragoon of ishgard, whose root motivation is “everything and everyone he ever knew was personally flambéed by nidhogg twenty-ish years ago,” expresses no skepticism or concern regarding nidhogg’s brood-brother assuring pretty elezen women that he is totally safe and noble by talking about how he ate his last pretty elezen girlfriend. to be fair, no one over the course of the entire goddamned xpac ever voices any sign that this troubles or even surprises them, but this is the starkest example: even when the reasons to be skeptical are highest, hraesvelgr’s version of himself as repeated by ysayle is considered to be the full truth and fully virtuous.

even though it’s true that hraesvelgr is not honest. when he tells the protagonist party what he presents as the truth about the origins of the dragonsong war in ratatoskr’s murder by thordan and his knights, he leaves out the role he played in it. we find out via the echo that the dragonsong war would not have happened without his consent—nidhogg, who laid dying, asked hraesvelgr for the strength of one of his eyes, to save his life and empower him to wipe ishgard off the face of the planet, every man, woman, and child, even if it takes him a thousand years. hraesvelgr granted that request. he is not challenged for being nidhogg’s accomplice, willing and knowing, in this—he’s never even acknowledged as having been dishonest. because we have to consider hraesvelgr to be the good, tragic, noble dragon, his misery and anger over his sister’s foul and most unnatural murder must justify his complicity and inaction.

never mind that his other sister, tiamat, is also suffering horribly, tortured and torturing herself in azys lla, for millennia without cease, without comfort, and he apparently doesn’t care about that. it is very difficult to see hraesvelgr as some kind of moral arbiter based on his actions in the game, but the story tries very hard to still present him as such, to the detriment of pretty much every character even associated with him. for example—a great deal was made of how team protagonist of ishgard must, in 3.3, trek to the churning mists and beg and plead for hraesvelgr’s aid and approval, must prove ourselves Worthy in his trials in sohr khai in order for him to consent to move against nidhogg. the trouble with this is that for it to work as intended, it requires the players to forget 3.2—to not think about the end of 3.2, about how nidhogg almost succeeded in murdering hraesvelgr’s daughter vidofnir—to not realize that if hraesvelgr still has to be arduously persuaded into stopping nidhogg after that, then he didn’t value his own daughter now and her welfare now as much as he does a thousand-year-old grudge. but he is the moral arbiter to whom the people who have been actually trying to change things and working to save lives must submit for judgment and be grateful for his approval.

narratively, hraesvelgr is presented as Good and Noble, but his actions do not at all back that up. The story, though, is completely unwilling to grapple with this; it makes excuses for him in order to present his strong preference for brooding inaction as at worst neutral. he is still furious/grieving even though the events were a thousand years ago, but it’s okay because dragons are immortal godlike beings who don’t experience time the way mortals do! fine, so what happens the next time some limited mortal being manages to hurt him or betray him deeply again? do we do something like this again and subject thousands and thousands of people to possible death and misery because it takes at least a thousand years for great wyrms to process grief?

and it doesn’t end with nidhogg’s death, even—the harm caused by hraesvelgr’s inaction regarding nidhogg. the 4.0 dragoon questline has established that nidhogg used the power of his great wyrm voice, his dragon’s song, to override the free will of the dragons of his brood and force them to wage war on ishgard even if they don’t want to—and that this power is almost completely irresistible, and it hasn’t stopped even with nidhogg’s death. the dragon we rescue as part of this quest was still lost to the song and the hatred even as far away as the azim steppe, and the only thing that was able to drive out nidhogg’s lingering song was the voices of dragons of hraesvelgr’s brood. this suggests that among the surviving dragons of nidhogg’s brood, populating the forelands and the mists, there are those who never wished to fight or straight up never had a choice (remember all those hostile dragonets? the baby dragons? y e a h), but none of the allegedly “good” dragons can lift their voices to help them (they can’t. then all the mobs in these zones would be gone. and then there wouldn’t be a game). but they’re still the good dragons because they said they are. (remember, this whole genocidal war business started because one dragon was murdered. just one. one dragon was murdered, therefore all of nidhogg’s brood—encompassing who knows how many dragons by this point—must be compelled to go to war against ishgard and if they die, then they die. god, the only way this makes sense is if nidhogg is totally off his rocker, consumed by monomaniacal hatred to complete irrationality for a thousand years. which hraesvelgr didn’t fucking care enough about to actually do anything meaningful, despite being an immortal great wyrm of demigod-like power himself. what a noble creature).

it’s not that hraesvelgr is highly fucked up that makes me hate him so much, it’s that he is so fucked up and is still treated as the Great Good Angelic Dragon. he’s not. he’s really, really not. like—fine, maybe his motivation for complete inaction is because the last time he ever did anything, everything went horrifically wrong, that’s what he thinks—that could be a good way to have such a character. but it’s not what we have, which is a story demanding the deference and respect due to a moral authority actually be given to a self-serving, indifferent, indolent liar.

and that, briefly put, is my beef with hraesvelgr.