#..........what a dumpster fire

[egophiliac]

You can’t pick Lilia for this. But who is your other favorite short character in Twst?

I like the angry little king boy 🌹

[determined-ghostworm]

Poor poor John, it seem’s that he’s gotten himself into a bit of situation.

@jotaroslooseeyebrowhair

-Too be completely honest everything I know about John Constantine is from AO3. With random snippets like ~steel blue eyes or short blonde hair… and not to forget the “Gods! I need a drink don’t contact me for the next month.. or better yet don’t at all” 👍✨👌

[lizzybeeee]

THE ENTIRE DRAGON AGE AMA IS A DUMPSTER FIRE

They avoided all the high-rated questions with genuine criticism (not blind hate!) and went for questions that were safer and allowed them more leeway. After that awful IGN article and that treatment of Davrin...God, just put it down. I have no faith that BioWare will be able to continue Dragon Age or Mass Effect with the respect it deserves.

Edit - They had an opportunity for genuine discussion with fans who were concerned/unhappy with the way Veilguard was -> people unhappy with the story, the marketing, the lack of 'RP' options in an RPG, etc... Instead they just doubled-down even more, avoiding those critical questions, with no real acknowledgement that fans have very reasonable problems with this game.

Some Highlights & My Initial Ramblings Below:

The Executors

"They attempt to manipulate events in the most subtle way they can manage."

So, very clear that they're not simply observers of what is happening in Thedas: they're manipulators...

"Magical Illuminati Confirmed! Lizard People Did 9:30 Dragon!!!!"

All that complexity of character -> his hatred of Orlais, his experience as a general, his relationship with Cailain, and the influence of Howe...all diminished. Any influence from a shadow cabal is too much influence - all the humanity of Loghain's choices/consequences...God, what a waste.

Not to mention what this does to other events/characters in the series -> they imply they've been intervening as far back as the magisters breaking into the golden city. I do not find this compelling! At all!

2. Solas and the Executors

Oh my god, he sounds like such a fucking Mary-Sue I'm so sick of Solas at this point -> "Actually, I know more about the Executors than anyone alive - not even the rest of the Gods know as much as me."

("I'm also, like, an Ancient Elven God, I'm responsible for the Blight and the Veil, and I kind of locked the Gods away cause they were evil - but, like, I'm really sad about it. Also the Herald of Andraste thinks I'm cute <3")

<- Previous comments: massive oversimplification, obviously

But I miss the days when not everything was about Solas. It removes so much interest and wonder in this world when the fucking egg is behind it all. I loved him as a character in DAI and now I just feel this bone deep tiredness when I see his stupid face.

Don't you dare threaten to bring Gareth David-Lloyd back -> keep him away from this mess!

3. The Fate of the Rest of the Evanuris

Yay. I'm so looking forwards to "The Return of the Elves: Electric Boogaloo 2" - it was done so well the first time!

"It was the elves all along!"

The only character with any potential to be interesting is Andruil*, but how they handled all this lore was done so shallowly and so poorly that I find it hard to give a damn anymore. Not to mention that the game literally mentions Ghilan'nain mourning Andruil - so is this a retcon/redirection/or have you confirmed that one of the most interesting members of the Evanuris' is dead?

*interesting in that she's established in lore to potentially have a tonne of really cool things attached to her (the void armour, the great weapon she has etc...). The rest of the evanuris are nowhere near as well established as she is.

4. Southern Thedas, Sociopolitical Issues, and Future Games

NOW YOU WANT TO INCORPORATE GEO-POLITCAL EXPLORATION?? You avoided any meaningful discussion like the plague in DATV but now you're acknowledging it?? OkaY. okAy.

They couldn't even give us the long-term ramifications of the mage/templar war how the hell am I supposed to believe that they will be able to pull off 'elven gods are real' etc...? For a game series that totes : your choices matter -> they have not proven that they have been able to show that in a meaningful way. They literally cleaned the slate with this game to avoid doing that.

So, what, does that mean that the Veil is never going to come down now? Or are you going to have the entirety of Thedas build themselves up again just to have the Veil fall and send things into chaos once more?

What a fatalistic, miserable outcome for Thedas -> why the fuck would anyone bother to live in Thedas if you're going to keep throwing meteorites at them? By all means, change/conflict has to happen for the series to move forwards...but this is just so miserable at this point.

(The Elder Scrolls, at least, gives people room to breathe between crisis' or sets them up in different areas of the world! Bethesda treats past installments/your decisions with greater respect than DATV does.)

Even, then, if the Veil remains up, that means that the spirits are just trapped in the Fade being miserable for the rest of existence. The entire series has been humanizing spirits, from Justice to Cole, and now they're just throwing in the towel? I guess they can stay in the fade now! Problem solved!

What do you mean the Evanuris are not a threat anymore? IN A PREVIOUS QUESTION YOU LITERALLY SAID SOME ARE STILL POTENTIALLY KICKING AROUND THE BLACK CITY?

Weakened, sure, but Solas was 'weak' in DAI. You're giving yourself an out if you decide to go back to the elves again. Please do, I'd love more content on how the elves alone fuck everything up!

5. More Southern Thedas, the Chantry, and Tevinter

Thanks for the confirmation that things in the South are so fucked up that they have to work alongside the 'Slave Capital' of the known world to rebuild!

Slavery was one of the biggest things that caused a rift between the north/south chantry system -> one of the reasons why there were exalted marches -> a uniting belief in the south is that slavery is fucked. They didn't address slavery in DATV - what hopes are there that they will do so effectively in a future game?

Don't tell me that Dorian fixes everything off screen either -> either he solves slavery off-screen or the south is being forced to work the slaver-capitol because their land is nuked and they have no ground to stand on.

I'm so thrilled.

6. Solas and the Idol / The Blight

I will never get over Solas fucking curing the Blight off-screen and no one asking questions/giving a shit. Hello?? The Hero of Ferelden would like a word with you???

So the Blight is calcified in Minrathous, at least, but everywhere further away is still fucked! Once more, the South is doomed to suffer from the long-term effects that regular blights have -> not to mention the red lyrium (which still exists according to the AMA) across the south.

I don't care; it's lame. It's a lame way to conclude the blight and I hate it. This game did not earn 'cure the blight from thedas' at all. You could have had us learn how to soothe a titan and see how that can diminish the blight but you did it this way.

Another 'magical ritual' because Solas has such a good track record with them lmao.

7. The Agents of Fen'Harel / The War with the Qun / The Crows

Turned him against the idea of being a leader???!!

Fen'harel's Call to the Elven People After the events at the Winter Palace, elves left the Inquisition under mysterious circumstances, as did elven servants across Thedas. None could say where they went, but those who believed the Inquisitor's story about Fen'Harel wondered just how large the Dread Wolf's forces were... and what the ancient elven rebel had planned. This is from the Trespasser Epilogue, Epler!

Your concept art for Joplin literally had him as a leader of a faction of elves. Just be honest that it's a retcon and you changed course - don't try to save face with this reasoning.

About the Antaam: "We needed some big mindless bad guys to fight and so we did this because we didn't want to address the Qunari War/Invasion we set up in Trespasser".

You had to canonize Sten as being alive and Arishok in order for this reasoning to work -> you didn't even come up with an alternative Arishok to take Sten's place.

Yeah, the exchange that set up the Crows we see in the game as "idealists" did not make the game. I can confirm that!

I'm sorry, "Caterina kept Illario in check?" as in, 'kept him an idealist and not the usual Crow'? The woman that beat him with a cane and starved him and his cousin to train them as Crows. Fuck off.

lmao -> tell me you're coming up with this on the spot without telling me that you're coming up with this on the spot.

8. World State Discrepancies - Isabela

Outright ignores the very real criticism about the marketing from this game and World States.

"there are absolutely places where we unintentionally suggested there was a hard canon (...that Isabela is always assumed to have joined Hawke's party.)"

Unintentional?

Excuse me, you have her talk about Merrill and the Kirkwall Crew as family - that was not unintentional in the slightest. Not to mention Sten, Blackwall, Sera, and Cole are canonized as being part of your world state no matter what.

You had a story you wanted to tell - one that only fit a few world states - and you went ahead with it and disregarded those choices. Don't try and lie about this all being a big misunderstanding.

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Edit - They could have taken the opportunity to address the very reasonable criticisms that people had with this game but they cherry-picked questions and avoided/minimized anything remotely critical.

They could have provided us some insight into the game development time but each time they approached the topic they settled for "we're happy with what we delivered and it was well optimized."

They had an opportunity to acknowledge that people were bothered by the handling of the lore/stories (to potentially mention they could course-correct/ rethink their plans) but instead they doubled down on everything that they did and even 'justified' some decisions. They doubled down on the Executors, Solas's changing motivations, the destruction of Southern Thedas, and the elves/Solas being at the heart of everything etc...

This AMA basically confirmed that the only reason they did what they did to the south was for a reset -> It's not a compelling or fulfilling narrative to have everything we've done reset back to ground zero off-screen. BioWare games differentiate themselves from other RPG's by their import system from previous games - it was compelling and exciting! With DATV they set the expectation that BioWare can outright throw out entire games worth of choices/build up, not solely retcon them.

Justifying your choice to water down the lore/world of your story by saying you'll address it in the 'next game' does not instill me with confidence, BioWare! It doesn't explain that lack of it in this game either!

They avoided every question that, rightfully so, pointed out the misleading comments made by devs in the pre-order period of the game:

the fact that there were only 3 imported choices from previous games was leaked by a reviewer -> BioWare was vague from the start about choices

that this game was the most 'romantic' in the series

that world states/ headcanons wouldn't be disrespected

that there are 'lore' reasons for bad darkspawn design

that there are lasting, impactful choices/consequences to be made in this game

that the lore/world was not watered or toned down

that companions are deep and you can disagree with them etc...

BioWare's behavior towards their customers in the lead up period to this games release was downright scummy. I absolutely felt misled after playing the game for myself and recalling what I read in interviews put out. While EA is undoubtedly poison, you can't hold them solely accountable for this.

I feel for the individual developers who worked on this in what was undoubtedly a toxic environment from EA - but I feel that it's pretty clear that BioWare itself has a lot of problems within and in their leadership/executives. Working for EA does not give them an excuse to mislead their customers.

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I already had a very grim outlook on the franchise from the end of DATV but this literally look my interest out the back and sent it to God. What a disaster.

[variousobsessions]

Trials of Apollo where everything is the same except Apollo keeps the potted hyacinth from Cabin 7 and brings it along with him on his trials and after he reunites with Meg they find out she can commune with the spirit of Hyacinthus through it because Plant Powers. He's basically her own version of the Arrow of Dodona and they bond through how much of a loser (affectionate) Apollo/Lester is. The rest of the story is the same but they have the added stress of keeping this plant alive and away from harm (the Burning Maze was absolutely a nightmare). The angst potential of Hyapollo getting to reunite but only in a roundabout way through Meg and having to navigate their way through what their relationship means now and how they continue, especially once Apollo starts really getting character development is just *chefs kiss*. I imagine that before Apollo went to face Python he gave the plant to Meg, trusting that if he didn't return she would take care of his semi-dead plant boyfriend. (After he succeeded, they definitely remembered the Golden Fleece and brought him back)

[thehungarythrophy]

time to bring this back

[catfuyus]

seeing mikey after he’s had a long hard day and giving him the soppiest, saddest little pout. all “aww, my baby, is life being too hard on you?”

“yea,” he pouts back, dark circles under his eyes. and you open your arms wide for him, pull his face into your chest and squeeze your love into him. holding him tight and rubbing his back, all while cradling his head to your chest.

and his muffled voice comes through your embrace, cheeks flushed and pink to the ears, “m hard.”

[smileysvech]

dating jeremy swayman

nsfw under the cut, minors please dni

physical touch and quality time are his top love languages, you cannot convince me otherwise

he’s always wrapping his arms around you and pulling your body into his bigger frame to engulf you in a hug

he loves a good cuddle and getting to hold you in his arms while you rest your head against his chest so you can hear his strong and steady heartbeat

he spends so much of his time out in nature, away from his phone with no distractions, so if you went on a hike with him he'd be so present and in the moment with you

jeremy talks a lot about how he wants to work his ass off to earn every opportunity he gets to play and he has that mentality in the bedroom too… he will work to please you and do everything he can to earn the reward of making you cum

part of being a goalie is having intense focus and being dialed in so he would be incredibly focused on how your body responds to his touch and his voice and he’s able to read your body so well and knows just how to make you completely fall apart

he’s so patient and usually isn’t in a rush and likes to take his time with you and prefers slow and sensual yet passionate sex over a quick rough fuck (though he’s not entirely opposed to it)

but he will ALWAYS perform some good aftercare for you

he's so attentive when he's leaving soft kisses all over your skin as he cleans you up, checking in on you "you okay there, pretty girl?" and murmuring "you did so well, love you so much", massaging any part of your body that might be sore

he also plays guitar so we know he’s skilled with his hands

his fingers are probably calloused and a little rough but it feels amazing when he rubs them against your clit or when he finally slides them into your wet and waiting pussy

he’s got a praise kink (hello?? telling ully “I’m coming handsome!” and the “fuck she’s a good girl” clip that lives in my head rent free like he’s not afraid to give out compliments and loves to worship you!!!!!!!)

he’s often described as one of the most vocal goalies so he’s gotta be just as vocal in bed

he will let you know how good you make him feel with his deep moans and groans and breathy curses when your lips are wrapped around his cock or your pussy is fluttering and squeezing him

“fuck, that’s it. right there. feels so good. such a good girl for me.”

“keep doing that, baby.”

also BITING KINK

y’all seen the way he bites his jersey???

I just KNOW he would love biting and marking you up

maybe it starts off as just soft, slow kisses but soon the two of you have moved to the couch and you’re perched on his big lap straddling him while making out

one of his big hands has found its way into your hair at the base of your neck and with an ever so gentle tug he signals for you to lean your head back so he can detach his lips from yours and trail kisses from your shoulder to your collar bone and up your neck and jaw

he lets his teeth sink into your flesh and you wince a little bit at the stinging sensation but he quickly eases any of your discomfort when he runs his tongue along the mark he left on you

god he would love leaving bite marks and hickeys all over your neck and breasts

he would be so smug about it too, just leaning back and admiring his work with a little cocky smirk when you run your fingers over the marks he left you when you assess the damage in your bathroom mirror later

you roll your eyes at him, but truthfully you love it too because it’s a reminder that he wants you and you’re his girl

and how can we not discuss his confidence and cockiness?

the way he is always smirking and winking during warmups

AND HIS MANSPREADING

the man knows he's packing

I have it in my head that he loves when you sit on his lap and wrap your arms around him to keep your balance

and he LOVES when you ride him

he enjoys seeing the pleasure on your face as you take what you need from him, doing whatever it takes to get yourself off on him

and after he's sure you've had at least one orgasm, he'd take control and thrust his hips up and drive his cock into you deeper and deeper, finding your most sensitive spots to bring you to another earth-shattering orgasm

tagging a few of my fellow sway girlies: @pyotrkochetkov @senditcolton @barzysunflower @cellythefloshie

[puhpandas]

one thing about escape the pizzaplex out of many is that like. they didnt even get the information about Cassies birthday party right 😭 the book says "none of Cassies friends showed up but then (JUST btw, no Gregory mentioned) Roxy made it the best birthday ever" but.... like.... cassies birthday went to shit AFTER roxy did her makeup. in all of the cutouts you see cassie happy and smiling next to Roxy with her makeup fresh, then her crying and Gregory next to her comforting her, THEN Gregory disappeared and it's just cassie crying. even if the cutout of Gregory comforting her isnt the one JUST about her crying she still obviously is crying in the cutout with Gregory. HE is what saved her birthday, because shed already had her time with roxy before she learned her friends didnt show up. her makeup is done but running in the Gregory cutout, because its POST-ROXY

it's just like. this is the ONLY known information about them. we know NOTHING else and not only does etp not even get the order of what happened at her birthday correctly and claims roxy saved her bday AFTER it went bad, they just. didnt mention Gregory at all as being there when he obviously 100% was, and was the savior of her bday and not roxy. genuinely insane that they messed up the ONLY information about them that's out there. this was the only thing they had to know and they got it completely wrong when it's not even fucking hard to understand, because 90% of the people to viewed/played ruin no matter how casual the fan understood the story being told in the cutouts correctly 😭

this is honestly why this book literally cant hold up as being canon, because every single piece of information conflicts with canon or ruins a preemptive set up narritave that steel wool is cooking for. I just truly cant see this book lasting

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

gee wiz, it sure is cool that Gordon survived the resonance cascade, I sure hope he's doing well

Finally decided to give Gordon a ref for my au Aftermath (which i've talked about here. Once.)

Also bonus:

[silent-wolf]

xo, kitty au except it's tim drake and his 10 million situationships from brentwood, louis e grieve memorial hs, and gotham heights

[littlestkoi-n]

the rage I feel when reading Blood of Olympus chapters 45-56 is almost equivalent in magnitude to the absolute joy I experience when reading The Last Olympian chapters 1-23.

remember when percabeth was good? when they meant the world to each other but had other people they cared about (nico, for one. both of them. so much), other worries and other storylines aside from their romantic plot? and when nico's completed arc wasn't repeated for no reason other than to dump more trauma on the youngest character in the series? when background characters were included in the story not for all the unnecessary last minute romantic subplots but because they were fun and fascinating to learn more about? and were actually friends with main characters? remember when grover was percy and annabeth's best friend forever? and antagonists were actually interesting and intimidating and had compelling goals? and the story revolved around friendship and family and loyalty? and death was definite and loss was palpable and battles were thrilling?

yeah. good times.

[sayxit]

Angel

[a-lilguy]

“Rivals”

[radishprincesss]

am i no good?

[yanguazalie]

Years ago on Instagram (which I deleted the app for due to my inactivity), someone had a ragdoll made of Lou. Everyone was honest in that the ragdoll looked... not perfect. But what stuck out to me was the luscious yarn hair on this doll, so I was inspired to draw Lou sporting his best Fabio finesse!

For younglings who don't know about Fabio, he was a European "heartthrob" back in the 90s. You would see his faced plastered on many romance novels, and margarine. And this one time, a goose whacked him in the face when he was on a roller coaster!!

[ahappydnp]

old phan blog archive digging is always an emotional rollercoaster because you'll have a handful of cute lil gifs and old nostalgic pics and then immediately after rants about how dan doesn't seem like himself lately and phil probably hates phannies and cat is probably going to move in and they're going to quit youtube to focus on the bbc