#... i went off on a tangent

[whatthefishh]

Hello! I hope you're doing okay :D

Can I have your thots for any of the Moon Boys? 👀

Hi love!! Thank you, feeling much better this week 🥰

Current thots on our boys under the cut (I’m jumping right in ok heads up lmao NSFW)

- thinking about Steven going down on you after a long day and just taking his sweeeeet time with it, going so slow to the point where you’re whimpering and begging him to go faster and he’s like “no, love, let me take my time, you taste so good” and goes back to his torture

- you come twice before he finally fucks you, and that’s mind-numbingly slow, too, until the end when you beg for him to fill you up (he goes crazy at that, hips speeding up to fulfil his fantasy of fucking a baby into you.)

- thinking about Marc. Thinking about Marc praising you with his cock buried deep inside but unmoving, unrelenting. His words making you clench around him and him calling you out on it. “You liked that, didn’t you? Yeah, I know, baby. I felt it.”

- when Marc notices you starting to doze off, he begins thrusting at an unforgiving pace, jolting you right back to the moment with him. He continues to call you his beautiful girl, makes sure to tell you how much he loves your body while completely wrecking you

- thinking about Jake Mf Lockley. This bad boy comes home to you crying about gaining a few pounds and some of your clothes fitting you differently. He hates seeing you cry and immediately takes action to kiss you, kiss all over your face, telling you how much he loves you and how sexy he finds you. Seeing you cry about it breaks his heart, it makes him desperate to make you feel better, to show you how much he loves ALL of you.

- Jake takes his time kissing every part of you, the junction in your neck, the bend in your elbow, kisses all over your chest and laves his tongue over your peaks, the pudge on your belly, the indent on your hip bones, brushes his lips down your thighs to nip at your ankles. Truly takes his time to compliment all of you, especially the parts he knows you’re insecure about, making you teary for a whole other reason now.

- Then he’s dead set on taking you apart. The only reason he wants to see you cry is from overstimulation from his mouth and cock. So he makes you come, repeatedly, and you cry, but this time you’re happy about it.

[blitzxiiru]

So... How is every ally of the Turtles doing in your Future AU?

honestly i didn’t expect anyone to really like my future 12! au, so i wasn’t really prepared to think about anyone else outside the main 6 :,)) plus there are way too many ally characters than i can keep track of, so i can’t exactly list them all specifically without writing a whole ass essay. i’m definitely open to suggestions and headcannons though, fire away in my inbox!

all i can say for now in general is that they’re all fine and dandy and recovering from trauma. the mighty mutanimals host a reunion party every month so they don’t drift apart, and karai + shinigami are girlfriends that lead the newly rebuilt footclan as vigilantes.

and chompy is bigger now! he sizes around below raph’s mid calf, and he is a very mischievous boy that causes mayhem around the lair. if the turtles aren’t out patrolling they’re at home trying to wrangle the little shit from literally chomping down every single thing in their household.

(look, you don’t just randomly find couches down the sewers, okay? the turtle bros literally had to steal their last couch from some unfortunate unsuspecting furniture store. they didn’t exactly gain money from saving the world countless times, and both casey and april are poor college students — and we all know how broke college students are. they deserve at least a free couch to rest for everything they’ve done for the entire fucking planet. because they literally prevented earth from getting blown off its rockers into nonexistence. give em a break — let them steal a damn couch.)

[frogprincesnowglobe]

One of my favorite Henry (Or Henry and Walter) moments is this very very in the background scene from Season 1 Episode 3 at 33:50. It's right in between Simon heading off to meet Wille to stay for the weekend and in the middle of Wille texting Simon. For some reason that will never make sense to me the English subtitles call Henry Vincent and then call Walter Henry in this scene, but it's Henry and Walter for sure, lol.

In the English dubs:

Henry: Well, here's the thing, our parents knew each other growing up.

Henry: They dated for a year [unintelligible because some background boy talks louder] before...

Walter: Wow, that's crazy! I had no idea.

Henry: No, I know.

Walter: How long have you known?

Henry: I know-- I know because my like my dad recognized your last name so he like, he like asked me if, if I know your or your family.

Walter: Oh! Okay.

Henry: Yeah I know.

Walter: That explains why there was [unintelligible because someone who sounds very British randomly says what sounds like "bloody vibe" over the top lol]

Henry: Yeah it's really like, like they knew each other

I can't speak Swedish so I don't know what the Swedish version says and the subs stop to focus on Simon and Wille texting (as you do, haha). This is one of my favorite moments though because it's so in the background and just a cute little moment between two friends. It also kind of seems like they're adlibbing here maybe? This is just after parents day and unless I missed it we don't actually see Henry or Walter with their parents.

But we really don't get a lot of information about most of the side characters, and here we have Henry and Walter telling us that their parents knew each other when they were younger and that they even dated each other for a whole year? I need to know everything!

Also it gives me so many plot ideas, maybe not even for the show but for fanfic or something. Like Henry's parents and Walter's parents are divorced and then Henry and Walter become stepbrothers when their parents get back together, or what if Henry's dad and Walter's mom had Walter and then at the same time Henry's dad and mom had Henry and they're half brothers.

[kirishwima]

why am i doing this to myself 🥲

[tofixtheshadows]

Id love to hear ur interpretation and analysis on falin! She’s one of my favorite characters and and I was wondering what ur thoughts on her are

Man, I struggle to think of anything I could say about Falin that others have not already said. But she's one of my favorite things about Dungeon Meshi too.

So much of the story revolves around Falin, and she's not even there. Tumblr loves to talk about haunting the narrative, but Falin might be one of the best examples of it ever put to page. She's dead. She's alive. She's dead. She's alive. She's alive but she's missing, she's alive but she isn't herself. She's dead but she might wake. She's dead but she's frozen in ice. She's alive but she's sleepwalking. They chase her ghost and they chase her body all through the story.

I think what Kui does with her is fascinating. Not just as character with a personality we can analyze, but as an object in a narrative- that's why I say she's one of my favorite things about the story, because I also mean it in a mechanical sense. As a writer, Kui's really good at misdirection- that is, setting you up to believe or expect something about a character or a plot, and then turning that on its head. It's most apparent with Kabru, but it works really well with Falin too.

Because the precious little sister is a very well known character archetype, right? So is the gentle healer. The heart of the party. The white mage girl. The damsel in distress. The martyr.

And this isn't a Laura Palmer situation, where we find out that beneath her wholesome surface there's something dark and troubled. No, Falin truly is a kind and gentle person. That isn't where the misdirection leads (and that, too, I think, is another misdirection- it's not "Plot twist, she isn't as nice as you thought!", which would almost be too easy).

The misdirection here is more about structure than about character (but also, yeah- a little about character).

What I mean is, with these archetypes firmly in mind, along with a whole other host of fantasy genre expectations, I think anyone who goes into Dungeon Meshi un-spoiled probably expects Falin's rescue to be an endgame event; at least on a subconscious level, where you're not really thinking about it but in the back of your head you're already stretching out the story to place Falin firmly in the distance. Fire breathing dragon at the bottom of the dungeon is perfect final boss material, right? Slay the dragon. Rescue the princess.

And Falin is the perfect prize in the traditional old school fantasy that the concept of the titular dungeon is a send-up to. Blonde (white), soft-spoken, sweet-natured, beloved by everyone. An angelic figure.

Maybe that's why Ryoko Kui gave her white wings.

It is sort of jarring when chapter 23 rolls around and it's already time to fight the red dragon. And it takes a few chapters, but they succeed. And then Falin's impossible resurrection succeeds. But by then you guess that this is not going to be the story you expected it to be.

I want to point out that Falin spends a lot of time getting, well, babied, post-resurrection. Marcille washes her in the bath, despite Falin stating that she's capable of washing herself. Marcille schools her about her mana use despite Falin demonstrating that she is not hurting for mana, and brushes aside Falin's explanations. Both Marcille and Laios refuse to actually tell her what happened. Laios scruffs up her hair like she's a little kid and scolds her for something she can't remember doing. Marcille explicitly calls her a little kid when Falin tries to talk about how much she's grown.

Of course I'm not saying that Laios was wrong to act like a big brother, or that Marcille shouldn't be worried about taking care of her shell-shocked friend in the bath. But the framing of it clearly shows a Falin who is struggling to be heard.

If you'd like to address the big gay elephant in the room while we're here, I want to state for the record that- whether you read her as gay or not -I think Marcille is completely oblivious during this. Because Falin is her little friend from school. Her best friend, yes, but also the young tallman student she, in her infinite elven wisdom, had to mentor and look after. Marcille has not yet accepted that Falin is an adult now, nor has she accepted that she, herself, is only barely past teenagerhood developmentally and is not nearly as mature as she believes. Of course she'd scrub Falin in the bath and fuss over her.

Falin, meanwhile, seems more than aware of her own adult body and the inappropriate way Marcille is treating it.

The mana-sharing scene is, I think, Falin trying to get a little of her own back. How do you like it, Marcille?

And she tries again in bed.

Maybe she's wondering if their relationship will change now that they're grown ups. If Marcille prefers her as a little girl, or at least as a woman who lets herself be guided like one; if Marcille will react badly if Falin keeps trying to assert herself. She also might be subtly trying to signal to Marcille that bed sharing, like bathing, carries a different weight to it when you do it as adults rather than as children.

With all this in mind, the decision to turn Falin from the precious prize they rescued into to the vicious dragon they have to slay, hits a lot harder.

Falin with a powerful, monstrous, destructive body. Falin, who couldn't even stand to cause people pain from using healing spells, slaughtering half a dozen people in brutal ways. And that's not her, she's being mind-controlled, but as an object in the story she has completely flipped. From damsel to threat.

And I love that she carries a little bit of that with her when she's resurrected again.

Because she's no longer the girl who's going to let herself be stifled by her brother's and her best friend's co-dependency, no matter how much she loves them. She's different now: stronger, eyes open, forging her own path instead of following in their wake. Falin is still going to come back to them again, but this time it won't be because they chased her. It'll be because they let her go.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Lan Wangji Goes To Lotus Pier AU: Part 4: Deranged Bedfellows

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4.5)

[fallen6253]

Calling him dad:

I feel like Cale would have a blank face with mildly wide open eyes if the kids were to call him dad.  Raon would fumble with the words a little because while he considers him his father, he still feels shy about being so open about it.  Hong is beet red while shouting in a mix of embarrassment and excitement about proclaiming this to his dad’s face.  On would say it a bit quietly but steadily, glancing away for a second before maintaining eye contact because she wants him to know they mean it.  She looks almost unfazed but there’s a slight red on her ear. They see Cale have a blank look on his face and know it’s because he’s an idiot and needs a moment to process. Which is absolutely right because he’s like ‘me? Dad? Where did they get that idea? Well, not that i mind, but– when did this development happen?

And he’s close to saying they should not call him that if they feel weird about it, but he sees the genuine excitement on the boys’ faces, and the fond determination on On’s face that seems to know his turmoil and tells him that yes they mean it and no this doesn’t feel weird it feels liberating and suddenly he can’t say anything.  He just pats each of their heads before letting them fall into his arms in a warm embrace.  

Because children should be happy.

And his kids will be happy for as long as he can make it so.

So if calling him ‘dad’ makes them feel like this, he’s okay with it.

(He’s more than okay with it)

He ignores the way his chest feels.  Because that’s not important right now.

What’s important is that On started sniffling like she was about to cry.

That was new.  On had never made such an expression.  She seemed happy and relieved.

Like the weight she had been carrying as the older sister that was thrown away by her home was finally lifted from her small shoulders.  The usual serious expression was gone.

And Cale hugged her tighter.  He ignored the way his arms trembled from the effort.  So did the kids.

Because children should feel like children.

And On was feeling like a kid again. 

And her siblings were right there with her.

With their dad.

With this large yet little family of theirs.

In their own corner of the world.

[dreamfaerye]

My mama always made sure we knew we have a place with her. When I got my first apartment, she said 'it's nice. if you can't hang, come home.' Due to mental illness, my twenties were rough and I moved back home several times. The reason I didn't just stay with her permanently is because of my stepfather, who I had a complicated relationship with (he was an asshole most of my life). Wherever my mama moved for work, we all eventually followed. She is home.

When my stepfather was diagnosed with cancer, my sibs and I moved their household (my mama, stepdad, stepsister, her two kids, and the animals) into our shared house. It was chaotic but we loved it. When my stepdad passed and we moved out of the house we lived in, the only reason I didn't get another place with them is because I was helping my best friend get back on her feet. I love having my own place but I miss living with my family too. My mama currently travels between our two houses. Our end goal is to get some land and build a family compound of sorts. We want to be together again.

I'm rambling but basically, yes, having an multi generational home depends on your relationship with your parents (and whoever else lives there). But if you have a good relationship with them, there's no shame in living with them forever (as long as you're contributing). That is community, that is love. Unfortunately, many people do not have that and I feel very blessed. if your parents are horrible, don't force yourself to stay with them, whether it's your culture or not. Make your own path, find your family.

there's no shame in continuing to live with your parents as an adult, but it does have an undeniable poisoning effect on your brain that you can't start healing until you live somewhere else

[crowleave]

ok so the thing is, the kiss really was the best way crowley knew to convey his feelings to aziraphale because nina and maggie were right, they do talk but they never say what they mean.

but that doesn’t mean they don’t understand each other, at least to a certain extent.

and crowley knows aziraphale

he knows that he loves books and plays and the stories made by humanity. he watches his angel learn magic the human way and finds out he learned french the human way and knows better than anyone how much he loves human food. he throws a ball to get nina and maggie together because that’s what the humans in jane austen novels would do.

crowley knows that aziraphale romanticizes humanity, loves the drama and the stories and every little thing that makes humans human.

and what could be more human than a desperate kiss asking someone to stay

[pocketgalaxies]

sucks that beau seems to hate laudna. they have so much in common with this ep and the 95-96 eps of c3

tea! yeah it's sad bc i think that dynamic could've been rly fun but 1) marisha absolutely did not have her head screwed on straight enough to pull off a beau/laudna conversation and 2) i think they're both characters that require a significant amount of chipping away and also knowledge of a Lot of backstory to really see and understand all those commonalities, and beau (in this context) would absolutely not entertain laudna's company long enough for them to get to that point dkfjskdjfsd

speaking of which, i actually think it's a little interesting in itself that they weren't able to be on any level to chat with each other. it's a symptom of the fact that they both Present themselves a certain way that is vastly different from the way they are when amongst their closest friends and confidants, and those chosen Presentations are very different from each other. when meeting strangers/new acquaintances, beau is standoffish, rude, blunt, pessimistic. laudna is excessively bubbly and excitable and fills the space with both her body and her voice. extreme opposites. but in private and trusted spaces, they both fall closer to some middle ground. this is different from people like jester, orym, chetney, etc. – people who are more consistent in their behaviors across different social contexts (obviously i'm speaking in relative terms here – everyone is a little different and more vulnerable when they aren't meeting strangers). but that intentional masking of their more authentic (insecure, lonely) selves makes it a lot harder to put them in a space in which they would believably broach those topics with each other. idk i just think they're neat!!

[helluvahotmess]

'I want you to continue to be who you are.' what if i fucking died what then

[latent-thoughts]

Sometimes I wonder if being contrary is the driving force behind it. Just to feel a bit different from the rest of the crowd.

I've faced similar remarks from my younger readers (something that contributed to my decision to move off wattpad entirely), who would oft say things that just made me go ???

The most common gripe is that they'd never do something that happens in my fics (even if it's a very mundane thing). And I'm sitting here like "I didn't write this story to cater to your specific tastes. Don't like, don't read?" To which they get offended.

The other one (very amusing) is when they cannot comprehend what 'completion' means in an erotic scene. Like... please go read a bit, I'm begging you. 😭

Just saw a TikTok complaining about ‘kitten’ as a pet name in fanfiction and while I do agree with their discomfort on that one the comments were FULL of people mentioning all the other common pet names ?? Like honey babe baby sweetheart etc ?? Is your partner just supposed to call you by your name the whole time ????????

[mayaishiipeters]

i like that all of nandor's old human portraits perfectly encapsulate the hardened, fearless warrior that he once was. that's definitely a guy who never relents.

and then all modern depictions of him are like: here's a little doll in his image. here's him holding hands with his best friends. oh here's a handmade glitter portrait of him and the man who brushes his hair every night

like. these r two different ppl. i dont know the guy in that first row. never seen him before in my life

[bougiebutchbinch]

I HAVE SOME AMAZING ASKS IN MY INBOX THAT I AM TOO SLEEPY TOO ANSWER BUT

know that they will be HAUNTING me all day. Like Nicepool is haunting Wade and Puppins as the most annoyingly polite and friendly ghost (Wade keeps trying various ways to exorcise him, but none of them stick. Turns out, Nicepool could die, but he's still immortal in his own weird way....)

[sapphic-agent]

Let's Talk About Shigaraki

I've had some time to collect my thoughts, so I think I'm ready to finally talk about Tomura.

Fair warning, this is more of a rant. Mostly because there isn't much to say except that Horikoshi hates this motherfucker, almost as much as he hates Izuku.

Tomura is a character whose autonomy and agency has been stripped by the narrative repeatedly. And that's not really uncommon in MHA (Izuku, Hawks, Shoto, etc.), so why am I pointing it out? Because Horikoshi's assassination of his character didn't need to happen. In fact, it feels like he bent over backwards to make sure it happened.

Anyone who's been around my blog long enough knows that the MLA arc is one of my favorites, I even put it in my top five MHA arcs. It did a great job of having Shigaraki progress as not only a villain but a leader and come into his own power. My one issue with it and what kept it out of top three was that it seemed to immediately undo all the progress Tomura made by making him want AFO (the quirk). Him gaining this quirk didn't tie into his goals at all and it flipped him from wanting to use his destruction to make a world for the LOV to be free in (Eric Vale's delivery of this scene in dub was fire btw, go watch it) to him just wanting more power. It was an extremely weird decision.

The PLA War further perpetuates this and it causes some confusion as to where Horikoshi was going with his character. Instead of a newly established in-control and ambitious villain, he turned Tomura into a puppet for All For One to use for his own benefit.

(Off topic, but that also felt out of character for AFO. Prior to this, he seemed to want Tomura to succeed and carve his own path, even taking the time to gently correct his outbursts and give him actual advice and guidance. You could argue that this was manipulation on his part, but it didn't feel like it at the time. Why would he want Tomura to be level-headed and calm if the plan was to use him as a husk for his own control? It felt way more like Tomura was initially meant to be his successor, not his puppet. This reads more like another Horikoshi retcon)

For some reason, it feels like the intention was to turn him into a victim for Izuku to save. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing... Except he didn't develop Izuku enough for him to be able to do that.

Izuku doesn't understand Tomura, he even admits this himself. He sees Tomura as someone who causes destruction for the hell of it. And you know what? He wasn't wrong going off his few interactions with him. But that's where we hit our problem; Izuku has not interacted enough with Tomura.

And honestly? There's no excuse for this. They're supposed to be our protagonist and antagonist. They're supposed to be parallels with one another. So why in the world do they only really have one intimate scene together?

(I have mentioned this before, but Izuku should have been the one kidnapped, not Bakugou. Bakugou being in this position provides nothing to the plot, especially because All Might would have sacrificed his power for anyone. Bakugou isn't a dynamic or integral enough character for this to benefit the character progression of Tomura or the rest of the LOV, but Izuku is. Him learning why they're villains would have really done so much for their characters, as well as his own)

This leaves their interactions during the Final War completely stagnant and stale. Izuku doesn't understand Tomura, and Tomura knows that. He sees Izuku as a goody-two-shoes with no understanding of how dark the world can be. Except Izuku does understand because he experienced it. But how would Tomura know that? And how would Izuku know how Tomura became a villain? There's no understanding between them which is why Izuku is unable to connect with Tomura like he did Stain and Gentle Criminal. Which is why him trying to save Tomura goes nowhere.

It didn't have to be like this though. Even if it was rushed, Horikoshi could have squeezed it in. He could have made the effort. He chose not to. Partly because he can't be assed to give either of them good development, but also because he avoids the shit Izuku went through like the plague. He hates to acknowledge it and when he does it's sugarcoated (and used for Bakugou's gain, not Izuku's own). Because of he gets into the nitty gritty of it, his favorite blond rat's "development" goes right out the window.

Horikoshi wrote himself into a corner here, which is why the Izuku vs Tomura fight is so lackluster. Their interactions mean nothing, so their fight means nothing. What's his solution to this?

To fucking kill Tomura and retcon his entire backstory to force AFO back into the plot.

The last shreds of agency Tomura had as a villain were ripped away. He can't even have his own tragic backstory at this point. Hell, Kotaro can't even own his own shitty decisions, blame is pinned on Nana even though him abusing his kids was his choice and AFO somehow had a hand in him having kids?? Ok.

(Abusive man not being held accountable without someone else- a woman- taking the shit for it, what else is new in MHA)

Also, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN AFO GAVE HIM DECAY?

In all fairness, this has been a theory for a while. But again, the entire point of his character in the MLA arc was that he took charge of his "cursed" power and made it his own. So AFO giving him Decay erases another part of his development.

(And to add to this, what exactly was the point of having him take a quirk away from Tomura? Why not make him born quirkless so a parallel can be drawn to Izuku (and even Aoyama)? What is it with Horikoshi and quirkless aversion? There are four characters born quirkless in the narrative even though they're supposed to make up 20% of the population: Izuku, Aoyama, All Might, Melissa. Only Melissa stays quirkless)

AFO just happening upon Tomura- desperate, shunned, and vulnerable- who just happens to be Nana's grandson makes him so much eviler and more despicable. Him seeing an exposed child and deciding to use him to be cruel to Nana's memory and Toshinori drives home his callousness. Making it so that he orchestrated it just takes away from that. Tbh, it just makes him look like a loser. So, both Tomura and AFO just suffered character assassination.

Back to killing Tomura, do you know how awful this comes off? This character claimed his own power and goals, only for that to be stripped by making him a puppet, the attempt to save him is drawn out and goes nowhere, and then he just fucking dies. Like he never mattered at all. Like trying to save him was a complete waste of time and there's nothing about him worth saving.

And people saying he deserved to die for his crimes, THAT ISN'T THE POINT. It isn't about what he did or didn't do. I couldn't care less about that. It's about how Horikoshi stripped him of agency again and again and then discarded him when he didn't serve the shitty narrative he created.

Tomura and Izuku deserved so much better than this

[batsplat]

It's a thing I already knew but all your beautiful analysis really made obvious (to me) how much of a grudge holder vale is. That man is never letting it go he's gonna hold his grudges into his grave

you know, I do think this is an interesting issue, because I'm not sure this is true of all his grudges. just sticking here with the grudges he accumulated in his capacity as a competitor, rather than just his general approach to life or whatever... how you judge this will kinda depend on how you feel about the 'reconciliation' he's experienced with some of his rivals - and whether you read the whole thing as sincere or not. now, personally I reckon he still dislikes biaggi, but also you are allowed to just dislike people so I'll give him a pass for that. some of the others, I'm a little more convinced by the whole reconciliation schtick

let's get valentino's take:

interesting that he mentions those three together, isn't it? and like, he's still not messaging biaggi or inviting him to his home - "even with max" kind of tells you all you need to know - but the other two? they said some proper nasty things to each other over the years!! I mean, the casey rivalry, there's some remarks from both sides where quite frankly I think I would struggle just a touch to get over it

I don't know, obviously this could all be pr stuff, but I kind of feel like... y'know, why bother? it's 2022, you're retired, who gives a fuck? sure it's a good look to be all magnanimous, sure it can be a bit of a way of twisting in the knife to the guys left in the cold, but also, who would care if you don't play nice? I think especially with jorge, you surely don't need to do all that, inviting him to your home and dancing with him... (which, again, some of the spats those two had...) and with the casey rivalry, if there's one guy who's still hung up about what happened between the pair of them, it's obviously casey (speaking of blokes who can hold a grudge). maybe this is giving valentino too much credit, but personally I buy it's more or less sincere. there's nothing to really indicate he's still particularly bothered by any of their past disagreements - he's basically going for the 'all's fair in love and motorcycle racing' approach. he knows he was an asshole, he accepts they were assholes too, whatever, that's how these things work. he's generally a fan of drama in rivalries, unsurprisingly, and he was happy enough to contribute his fair share - but he does see it as fundamentally being part of the game

to point out the obvious, check out who he's left out: sete and marc. that's where he can't let go of the grudges... because it's not about the offence itself as much as it is about the betrayal. this is the thing with valentino, right, it's about what kind of bond you had with him. if you weren't his friend in the first place and then piss him off as a rival then, y'know, whatever. obviously he's going to be vicious in trying to get back at you, but also he's really not going to waste his time feeling too aggrieved by it. I mean, think about how all the bullshit between him and casey dropped off sharply post-2012... from valentino's end anyway. think about how jorge and valentino pretty quickly got on again whenever they weren't fighting for supremacy within yamaha. they weren't friends in the first place, then they were enemies for competitive reasons for a while there, then it's over and valentino is basically happy enough to call it bygones

but... if it's a certain kind of bond you had with him and then you wrong him... that little mental list of all his past grievances, all your past transgressions, that's where it comes in. that's where he ices you out. denies you any emotional warmth. ensures that any interaction going forward is conducted entirely on his terms. where even any public 'reconciliation' won't truly be sincere.... or, certainly he's not going to forget what happened. if something else happens... it's like you've always got the potential of triggering this lingering resentment, in a way, where all that past stuff is still primed and ready to be called upon. he certainly doesn't just let it go

or, as he puts it in his autobiography:

Biaggi and I never talk to each other. I mean, we've never had a real conversation, anything that's lasted more than the requisite time to insult each other or put each other down, in the nastiest way possible. In any case, I don't hate him. It's true, we've never been friends, but hatred is something different, and that's too serious a word to describe our relationship. Far too serious. No, we have a reciprocal antipathy. No doubt this is a result of what we do for a living and the fact that we both want to win every single time. And perhaps it's also a function of the fact that we have very different personalities and very different ways of seeing things. Still, I don't think this means we hate each other, as some journalists have written. I think I could feel hatred for someone, but only for someone far worse than anything Biaggi has done. For example, if I were betrayed by a friend, then, yes, I could hate him. But Biaggi will never betray my friendship for the simple reason that we are not, and never have been, friends. Our relationship is very clear: we compete on the track - outside the track, each goes his own way. You could say we detest each other cordially.

... I mean. he said it, not me. and given this book was first published in '05... biaggi can't betray his friendship because they were never friends... I'm not saying he's thinking about sete, but it has to at least be a possibility, right? he's talking about one rivalry here and refusing to even mention the other... and the one he's refusing to mention is the one where he was friends with the other bloke. I don't know, maybe that's reading too much into it! and anyway, even if this passage wasn't really about sete, it's obviously still revealing. "detest each other cordially" is essentially what he was doing with casey and jorge (or from his point of view in any case, not entirely sure they'd agree with that). the grudge comes when he feels let down by you... and then, yes, he'll never let it go

of course, he's willing to set aside his grievances for a while if there's sufficient motivation for him to do so. in 2009, when he had so definitively won that rivalry with sete, why bother kicking up a fuss? in 2016, quite frankly it was just too much, and it was getting to the point where it was obviously hurting him too. on the one hand there was the media furore that had been going on non-stop since sepang, on the other hand it was also hurting his own approach to racing. there's reports from the time how visibly aggrieved he still was in the first few races of the season, and it took until they got back to europe for him to... y'know, have fun again. it's not sustainable to be walking around with a constant dark cloud over your head and broadcasting burning resentment towards your two main rivals. certainly not for someone like valentino - he needs to be having fun! the slight rapprochement needed to happen, in a way, because otherwise those years would have been even worse for everyone involved. but that doesn't actually translate to forgetting any of those grudges. this is about convenience more than anything else

goes to show, really... most of the time he doesn't take these things personally. I talked about it a bit in this post, how maybe it's also something that changed over time for him: the question of whether he was willing to develop these kinds of bonds in the first place with competitors... because he does possess a certain level of self-awareness in terms of what these kinds of rivalries are like and what they do to interpersonal relationships. ideally, you don't want to be hurt by a friend like that, right? better not to have that kind of emotional attachment with your competitors in the first place. how unfortunate it'd be if all those years after sete the circumstances aligned for him to see a competitor as something like a friend again... because, after all, those are the only people who could betray him. those are the only people where he thinks he could truly hate them