watery-melon-baller · 8 days ago
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does anyone know a better way to try and reformat a research question for a survey because I am SUFFERING
#I already have a bunch of answers but this data isn't very helpful-#-and maybe I should not change the question so the data is at least consistent all around#i have multiple questions that are all poorly formatted and have not given me much useful data#but I don't know how I could possibly reformat them in a way that isn't a bu ch of open ended fill in the blank questions#my goal here is I'm trying to see like. Flanderization in fandom. Trying to see the canon vs fanon versions people have of characters#but not everyone might realize the version they consider canon IS fanon. So I can't ask it outright I have to fucking. like#idk trick them into telling me and then I can pop out and be like AHA YOU'RE WRONG#i m not sure the best way to go about this#the way I have it is like. I describe the character in 5-7 traits and ask people to pick 3 of them#and i also have an 'other' option if they want to elaborate#buuuuttttt#This question I feel like hasn't been super helpful#because again I can't just be like “do you think X character is just always lovey dovey 24/7 to character Y”#because again. That's too god damned obvious and people are gonna be like no! Even tho subconsciously they do think that#Also I don't think the traits I picked were very good either. It was just like. Too Broad#I'm planning on sending out my survey again and I wanted to see if I could fix some questions before I do so#there is just the issue of the data being inconsistent#I think I might just have to go in and change the character traits#that's I think the issue. But again I don't know how to ask what I want without being straight up like#“Do you think person Xs entire character revolves around character Y”#even tho the entire fandom acts like they do. They're gonna be like what no X is more then that!#and then they immediately go back to treating X like Ys arm candy#sigh.#sociology#fandom culture#fandom#psychology#idk if someone could assist that would be wonderful lmfao#if there's a better way to get the results I want then#it's all just. subconscious. Is all. Sihhnmg
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clatterbane · 1 year ago
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I had another routine endocrinology check-in appointment the other day, this time with a different specialist nurse. The doctor I had been seeing here left and apparently moved back to Cyprus (I knew she was going not long after my last appointment), so I apparently got shuffled over to a different team. The next appointment up, whenever that is, will evidently be with that other doctor. At least they are assigning one per case there, instead of "you'll see whoever is available on the day, and better act suitably grateful for it". It's still a crapshoot, but at least not a fresh one every single time you go in.
Anyway, as always I went in halfway expecting a bitch-out session. Crammed full of weird assumptions about everything that I must be Doing Wrong as a substitute for actual help, however divorced from reality those assumptions might be. (Not least, by just being a lazy fat whiny American. I mean, I am very obviously American.)
Note: This has never actually happened at this clinic, to date. Thankfully, they did not ruin that record at this appointment. I was also going in without much for anyone else to complain about.
What I actually got: Surprise at how unexpectedly good all my numbers were looking, now that I am getting appropriate treatment. With a quick review to make sure I had all the prescriptions I needed until they want me back, and to make sure I didn't have any particular questions. Went away in maybe 15 minutes (5 of that spent waiting for a quick in-office HbA1c finger stick test), with a sadly gratifying"You're doing great! Don't change anything!"
Funny how that works when you're actually getting the tools you need to manage things, eh? 🙄
(I was unsurprised that the quick A1c came back at 4.3 / 23, which was actually the highest so far over the past few years of regular testing but still well into the "unexpectedly low even for a nondiabetic" range. My CGM data has been estimating it at a more plausible 5.5-5.6 based on blood sugar readings, which is still in "nondiabetic levels of control" territory. There has consistently been something screwy going on there since I was initially dx'ed 15+ years ago, with implausibly low A1c numbers the whole time. They have been trying to figure out what might be affecting my red blood cell/hemoglobin turnover here--thus, some of the extra blood tests the last endo kept running. Still haven't figured it out, since there are so many things that can possibly influence that in one direction or the other. My best guess is that at least part of it is related to the Gilbert's, with the naturally high bilirubin. Anemia probably hasn't been doing that much good, either. Though I think that has improved with the iron supplements the endo actually gave me. Whatever might be behind the hemoglobin weirdness, it's been going on for many years and hasn't killed me yet. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
Anyway, I was more relieved than I should have ever needed to be at how that appointment went. Here's hoping that the different doctor they've assigned me to won't be a complete dick either.
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college-girl199328 · 2 years ago
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It took one GO Transit scheduling change to turn Siddhartha Batra from a regular commuter to a full-time remote worker. A direct bus operated by the regional transit provider provides an easy way for the 31-year-old civil engineer to travel from home in downtown Toronto to his job roughly 35 kilometres away in Mississauga, Ont.
But some changes GO operator Metrolinx recently implemented on some of its most popular train and bus routes effectively doubled Batra's travel time, based on GO Transit's trip tracker. The prospect of the longer commute prompted him to obtain permission to abandon the journey altogether and work from home permanently.
"There is no way on Earth I'm travelling two hours on public transit, one-way," Batra said in an interview. "I won't be using it all because it just doesn't work anymore."
Batra is not alone in his frustration with the scheduling changes, which Metrolinx announced late last month and implemented as of Saturday.
The agency bolstered service levels on the busy routes connecting Toronto and Kitchener, Ont., but also scrapped some train services and replaced them with bus routes. Some bus schedules were also adjusted to eliminate a key connection point at Toronto's Union Station, a transit hub linking the regional and local public transit systems.
Batra's old Route 21 bus fell victim to the change. Rather than catching a direct ride from Union, travellers are now being asked to take a GO train to one of three stations on the Lakeshore West line before reconnecting with the bus to continue the trip.
"We now have to go from Union to Port Credit and then take a bus across. So it's just made a lot worse, the transit time," Batra said, noting the new schedule adds nearly an hour to the commute.
The routes in question run through some of the fastest-growing regions in the province. Statistics Canada's latest census data shows the population of Milton, Ont., the final destination for Route 21 buses, soared 20 percent between 2016 and 2021. The denizens of Milton's home region of Halton jumped nearly nine percent during that time, while neighbouring Peel Region saw its population climb roughly five percent to about 1.45 million residents.
A statement from Metrolinx said long-anticipated efforts to refurbish Toronto's Gardiner Expressway prompted the changes on Route 21, arguing the new schedule will make travel times more "consistent and reliable" amid the expected construction.
A message on the GO Transit website announcing the service adjustments said they result in "faster trips for those heading further west to Oakville, Burlington, Hamilton and beyond."
Batra, for his part, isn't buying the effort to position the changes as improvements. "That's just false advertising, so that's my first frustration," he said. "My second frustration is the amount of notice we were given was communicated with no notice at all for people to adjustments to their jobs."
Batra believes Metrolinx should have given commuters at least four months to adapt their travel plans or work schedules, noting transit systems in other places he's lived in, like Singapore and Dubai, don't generally overhaul routes on such tight timelines.
He's not the only one unhappy with the latest changes. Mississauga resident Quratulain Syeda, 34, anticipates the alterations will turn her commute into "a whole mess."
"This was basically my main way of getting into the city because I only use public transport to get around," she said of the old Route 21 bus. "I do not have a car, so I rely on it heavily."
Syeda, who frequently travels to Toronto to visit friends and attend events, said she used to be able to get from her front door to Union Station "in 45 to 50 minutes at any time." The new configuration has added about an hour to that trip.
"I will probably look at [taxi] options or maybe not try and go to as many events or things in the city," she said.
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gendercensus · 3 years ago
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On plural inclusivity and "plural they"
In the Gender Census feedback box and elsewhere I have frequently been asked:
to make the annual Gender Census survey more inclusive of plural participants, and
to add "plural they" to the checkbox pronouns list alongside "singular they" in order to be inclusive of plural participants.
It's a rambling topic, so I'll address them in sections in that order.
~
INCLUSIVITY RE: PLURAL PARTICIPANTS
I've been inviting plural people to take part in a short survey about the Gender Census, asking questions that help me get a feel for the issues involved and asking about whether people feel included in the survey (and why or why not). At the time of writing there have been 139 responses, I will leave it open for ongoing feedback, and I'm unlikely to be publishing the spreadsheet of results in full because the responses are off-topic and very personal. However, I will refer to some individual responses as well as my personal experience discussing inclusion with plural systems.
Here's a graph based on the responses so far:
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I'm asking for direct feedback about this issue because over the past few years plural folks have been one of the more consistently vocal groups in the feedback box of the survey and elsewhere, which would usually be fine, but I've been finding it very overwhelming and confusing. I think that's because the advice/demands/questions have been unusually inconsistent, often to the point of being in direct opposition to each other, and the result is that I have no idea what to do.
Before now, most plural people have understood that it's quite a nuanced issue. When asked I would explain that if they felt that filling it in once for the whole system made more sense they should do that, and if individual system members felt strongly that they should participate alone then they could do so.
This year it got to the point where I had to make a decision and write unambiguous, easy-to-follow guidance about how plural people should fill in the survey, because I had one system submitting dozens of responses and giving the exact same three points of feedback, paraphrased, over and over - making it look like many unconnected people felt strongly about these particular issues, when in reality it was all this one system. I decided that, to be as fair as possible, plural people should fill in the survey once per body.
When I posted about the "once per body" policy on social media I received very little direct feedback, which leaves me in the position of not knowing whether that's because I did it right and you have no complaints or because you've all jumped ship! The statistics and comments from the plural feedback survey are very helpful in this regard:
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It seems that plural participants, on the whole, are fairly understanding about it all, often supportive, and are still able to participate. ("Unknown" and "no strong feelings" together are a much higher proportion than I expected.) Some positive feedback included appreciation for the ability to select as many gender identities and pronouns as one wants. Common arguments against the policy include feeling that system members are not treated as people in their own right, which is understandable; the Gender Census is designed to present practicable data about nonbinary people for use within a system that assigns one identity per body, socially and bureaucratically. A "once per body" policy makes sense when prioritising nonbinary people, but adds to the list of crap that only plural people have to struggle through when they're not the main focus of the research.
I was surprised that only a couple of people pointed out that some systems have amnesia between members, and so some systems may participate more than once per body unintentionally. (I understand that this is unavoidable, and I certainly wouldn't be upset about it. Sometimes non-plural people participate more than once by accident, too! On the scale we're talking about, I'm unlikely to even notice it happening.)
Back when I first started to get requests to make the Gender Census more plural-inclusive, my first move was to ask people what exactly they felt excluded by. Responses to this have been continuously nebulous, to the extent that I don't think I have ever made any design changes to the annual survey at all as a result. I also asked what they would do to improve the survey and help them to feel included, but this has yielded very few viable ideas for how to move forward, just because so many of the ideas that people suggest are mutually exclusive.
As an example, I spoke to one member of a system who expressed, understandably, that their experience of themselves as plural inextricably affected their experience of their gender(s), and after some discussion they concluded that the two were so intertwined that it made the most sense for it to be included in the identity question, e.g. a checkbox called "plural" alongside nonbinary, genderqueer, trans, etc. I explained that I don't arbitrarily add things to the checkbox list, but it would be counted if it was typed into a textbox underneath, and if it went over 1% I would consider adding it to the checkbox list. They became increasingly angry. The only way this situation would make sense for them moving forward was if I added "plural" as an identity checkbox option immediately. Conversely, just a couple of weeks previously I had spoken with a member of a system who was very vocally distressed at the idea of plurality being conflated with gender, and wanted to make sure that I never added "plural" as an identity checkbox option.
As another example, in the plural feedback survey when I asked people how they felt about the "once per body" policy, a member of one system was against it and said "it feels like this policy doesn’t recognize us as separate people", but a member of another system was in favour and said "we're encouraged by our therapist to think of ourselves as dissociated parts of a whole. So we're all one person, just not directly connected like a singlet [non-plural person] would be. From that perspective, it makes sense to keep us as one person in the gender census, no matter how many genders we have." It's not possible to reconcile these two perspectives.
From the very beginning up until now, the unifying theme for feedback from plural people and their allies is "please be more inclusive of plural people." That's a really good start! After that it becomes a plate of tangled spaghetti.
Here are some themes I've managed to tease out, and my thoughts.
"Each system's alter should be able to participate in the survey individually if they want to." Some systems have literally hundreds of alters, and several systems have acknowledged in the feedback survey that this is probably both impractical for many plural people and unfair on singlets.
"We're okay with taking part once for all of us in the system, but we're just checking all the boxes that apply to at least one of us, and some of those are explicitly disliked by at least one of us. This is uncomfortable." I think that's... probably okay, actually. Other subcategories of participants whose identities fluctuate that strongly (e.g. a genderfluid person who is sometimes very male and sometimes extremely not male) or whose pronouns are context-dependent are also in this predicament. Participants often express a desire to rank their identity terms by importance, accuracy, fluctuation or frequency. The survey aims to collect broad and fuzzy data about a very large group of people, to monitor trends and let people know what language we're comfortable with on the whole. This survey just isn't looking for that kind of nuance.
"We're okay with taking part in the survey once for everyone in the system, but there should be a way to separate out responses about different alters within that one response." It's literally impossible to program the survey to have infinite subsections for each alter, but if it were possible, what would I do with the data? I think the most likely approach would be combining into a list of identities etc. "per body". The participant would feel better for being able to enter different words for different alters, but it would be more work for them, and it would be more work for me to process responses from plural people just to have them be counted like those from non-plural people.
"There should be a 'plural' checkbox in the identity list so that we can express that our gender is influenced by our plurality." I consider adding terms to the identity checkbox list when they're typed into the textboxes by over 1% of participants. There are some situations where I'll make an exception to that rule, but it's unusual and this isn't one of them. Whether you enter a term using a checkbox or a textbox makes no difference to how well-represented you are in the results.
Maybe just a question that asks if you're plural, with a checkbox? What would this checkbox do? Plurality is beyond the scope of the survey, along with things like height and eye colour. It would allow curious people to analyse the responses using plurality as a variable, but I wouldn't include it in any analysis in an annual Gender Census report.
That last one is particularly interesting, because it's what I actually did in the supplementary survey. I wasn't 100% sure in advance whether or not I would need that information for the singular vs. plural they issue, so I included an "I am/we are plural" checkbox just to be on the safe side. As far as I could tell, the survey was no more or less materially inclusive than the annual Gender Census survey. There were a couple of interesting patterns to report in the statistics, but the main things I noticed were:
Feedback saying that the survey wasn't inclusive of plural people was non-existent.
Several people thanked me in the feedback box for making the survey plural-inclusive.
Several people promoted the survey on social media by using its plural-inclusivity as a selling point.
Again, the supplementary survey didn't take a different approach. There was no particular difference in language, there was no indication that whether or not you're plural would be integral to the reporting of the results or even used at all, the only difference was the existence of a checkbox that let participants declare their plurality.
That's all it took to cause a complete U-turn in feedback. A checkbox that doesn't relate to gender or connect to any of the other questions in any way, and isn't particularly statistically useful based on the supplementary survey. It doesn't make the survey more inclusive, it just acknowledges that some participants are plural, and gives them a way to declare it.
Whether or not participants are plural is beyond the scope of the Gender Census, which aims to collect broad data about how we as nonbinary and otherwise genderly-interesting people want the world to see and describe us. It just doesn't make sense to include questions about plurality in future surveys. But I'm honestly amazed and a little confused, because until the "once per body" policy was added it seems that there wasn't actually anything about the Gender Census that prevented plural people from participating, at least not more than anyone else whose genders change significantly over time.
~
SHOULD "PLURAL THEY" BE ADDED TO THE CHECKBOX PRONOUN LIST?
This is something that participants often ask me to do in order to make the survey more plural-inclusive, so I decided to seriously consider it.
The first draft of the supplementary survey asked over 1,000 participants about this issue, but I had to scrap those responses and then redesign and restart it because, even though dictionaries are fairly clear on what exactly "singular they" is, a lot of survey participants who are not dictionaries seemed to be in disagreement (or confusion) about what singular they and plural they actually are. I have been unable to find any academic or reference articles online using the phrase "plural they" at all.
Here are some of the things people have told me recently:
"Singular they" is when you use "they" with singular verbs, e.g. they is a teacher.
I can't say that I use "singular they" pronouns because I always say "they are". "They is" just sounds wrong to me.
"Plural they" is when you use "singular they" pronouns to refer to a system/someone who is plural.
"Singular they" and "plural they" are grammatically identical except for the name.
"Singular they" and "plural they" are functionally the same and should be combined into one option called "they" in the annual survey.
Let's start by stating what we do know for sure.
~
THEY VS. SINGULAR THEY
For the record, "singular they" is defined by its purpose and context, not the specific words used.
Wiktionary says:
they (third-person, nominative case, usually plural, sometimes singular, objective case them, possessive their, possessive noun theirs, reflexive themselves, or, singular, themself)
It then goes on to specify three use-cases:
third-person plural, referring to two or more people
third-person singular, referring to one person
"indefinite pronoun" - people; some people; people in general; someone, excluding the speaker. E.g. "they didn’t have computers in the old days."
So we've got "they" (groups), "singular they" (individuals), and "indefinite they" (an "other" that is ambiguous in number).
Again, I have never found anything academic or, er, dictionarical (lexicographical?) that calls any of the forms "plural they", so my first job is to find out whether what Gender Census participants are calling "plural they" is the same as what the dictionary just calls "they", which is defined as the set used to refer to two or more people. For the purposes of this article I will call it regular "they".
~
WHICH WORDS MAKE UP SINGULAR THEY?
Even though most dictionaries will state which words make up singular they, and it's usually they/them/their/theirs/themself, if you change individual words within the set or even around the set it is still called "singular they" if it is used to refer to only one person. This might happen due to regional or cultural variations. So whether you say "they is a writer" or "they are a writer", whether you say "themself" or "themselves", if you're talking about only one person, it's still singular they.
In the annual survey, singular they is consistently chosen in the checkbox pronoun options by the most participants, usually more than twice as popular as the next most popular option. (I use the dictionary-provided set, and I've checked it's still the most commonly used in several polls and surveys along the way.) In the annual survey, singular they is presented as:
singular they - they/them/their/theirs/themself (e.g. "they are a writer")
~
WHICH WORDS MAKE UP PLURAL THEY?
I had never heard of "plural they" before people started asking me to add it to the checkbox list in the feedback box of the annual Gender Census survey, but it seemed clear from the name that it is meant to be contrasted with singular they, and I wondered if perhaps everyone else had been calling regular "they" (for referring to two or more people) "plural they" this entire time and I just hadn't noticed.
It was specifically presented to me by participants as a pronoun that a plural system could claim, and that a plural system might prefer over singular they. This tallied with my initial assumption that "plural they" may just be regular "they" referring to groups, since a system is a body containing two or more distinct individuals, so if they wanted to be referred to as a group then singular they would be inappropriate and regular "they" would fit.
I went to the pronouns spreadsheet of the 2021 Gender Census, and took every pronoun set that was named and copied it into a new spreadsheet. I ran a query to list all sets that contained both the words "plural" and "they" in the name field. There were 71 results, out of ~44,500 total responses. I ran another query to find out what these people were entering in the reflexive field, and here's what I got:
themselves - 61 (85.9%)
theirselves - 3
them - 2
themself - 2
themself (plural) - 2
theirself - 1
So I think it's safe to say that the set that people are calling "plural they" uses "themselves" as the reflexive, which is consistent with dictionaries' reporting of regular "they".
I conclude that most people do mean regular "they" when they refer to "plural they". "Plural they" seems to be they/them when used to refer to two or more people, including the plural reflexive "themselves".
As in "singular they", if you change individual words within the set or even around the set it is still called regular "they" if it is used to refer to two or more people. This might happen due to regional or cultural variations. So whether you say "they is writers" or "they are writers", whether you say "themself" or "themselves", if you're talking about two or more people, it's still regular "they" (or plural they).
~
IS PLURAL THEY GETTING SMUSHED INTO ANOTHER PRONOUN/GROUP?
I recently explored the (apparently unintentional) overlap of Spivak (e/em) and Elverson (ey/em). In case you've not read it, here's a brief overview: I found that it might be that Elverson (not on the checkbox list) is many times more popular than Spivak (on the checkbox list), even though it isn't being written into the pronouns textboxes often enough for it to reach the 1% threshold. Since the two sets are identical except for that one letter in the subject form, it is very likely that many of the people who use Elverson (ey/em) pronouns are choosing the Spivak checkbox option in the annual survey because they don't realise the spelling is different, or they think that they are minor spelling variants of the same set. I concluded that in order to get a fair count of both sets I will need to list both in the checkbox options next year, even though Elverson hasn't been typed in by over 1% of participants yet.
It's possible that the same thing is happening with singular and plural they. I ran a couple of Twitter polls, asking people whose pronouns are they/them which set they prefer, and presented answers like this:
a) Singular they, referring to only 1 person: they are themSELF
b) Singular they, referring to only 1 person: they are themSELVES
c) Plural they, referring to 2+ people: they are themSELVES
Here's the results, with 927 usable responses:
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The results of this poll are really useful, because it allowed people to choose between singular and plural they AND themself and themselves, in combination. We can see that of the people who call their pronouns "singular they" (referring to only one person), the majority prefer "themself" as the reflexive, but a respectable proportion prefer singular they with "themselves", even when presented with the option of "plural they" (referring to two or more people).
(I have a policy of providing the most popular word choices in checkboxes, so I will continue to provide a they/them checkbox option that says "singular they - they/them/their/theirs/themself", but since singular they is consistently the most popular pronoun this is something I like to keep checking in on.)
If we apply these proportions to the 2021 Gender Census responses and imagine that everyone whose pronouns are they/them chose "singular they - they/them/their/theirs/themself" regardless of how accurate that is, this would mean that 3.7% of all respondents would check a "plural they" box, which is well above the 1% threshold for adding something to the checkbox list. Why not add it to the list, the way I'll also be adding Elverson to the list? This graph may help:
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I generally consider it unwise to make big decisions based on Twitter polls, because the sample is much smaller and more biased than a standalone survey. Twitter requires membership, Twitter membership is skewed younger, and younger members are more likely to use Twitter often and see polls when they appear.
However, even I can't deny that there is a very clear mandate here for Elverson to be added to the checkbox list. When given a straight choice between the Spivak, Elverson, both, and neither/something else, participants were over six times more likely to choose Elverson over Spivak. (For context, Spivak got 4.3% in the 2021 Gender Census as a checkbox option.) Even if this poll were somehow put to the entire Gender Census participant group, it's hard to imagine a scenario where the results shift enough that Elverson gets a lower percentage than Spivak.
4.7% of a smaller sample of younger Twitter members just isn't enough to push me to add something to the checkbox options. I really hope that everyone whose pronouns are "plural they" takes the time to type it into next year's survey as a pronoun distinct from "singular they", so that if they do end up being over 1% of participants I can add "plural they" to the checkbox options.
~
IN CONCLUSION
As far as I can tell, the Gender Census doesn't particularly exclude plural participants. Systems are still able to take part, so it is at least as inclusive as any other survey of a similar nature, maybe even more so thanks to the ability to choose multiple gender identities and pronouns "per body".
There isn't sufficient evidence to support adding "plural they" to the list of checkbox pronouns at this time, and systems can be represented in results by typing any plural-inclusive terms and pronouns that are not on checkbox lists into some of the many textboxes provided, as any other participant would be expected to do.
The "once per body" participation policy is uncomfortable for a significant number of plural people. However, due to the intensely varied experiences of plural people, any policy on that issue that I impose would make some plural people uncomfortable - and it turns out that I chose the "side" that plural people are more likely to agree with. The survey isn't intending to collect or convey the more nuanced information that plural people (and others) have said that they would like to provide.
A separate question that specifically asks participants whether they're plural makes systems feel seen and acknowledged, but is beyond the scope of the project and doesn't add value to the data or analysis.
So, I will not be making any changes to the Gender Census at this time, based on the information I've gathered so far. However, I welcome further feedback in the plural participants' feedback form, which will remain open, anonymous and private.
~
Edit: Follow-up.
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nostalgicatsea · 4 years ago
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Common questions about and excuses for racism in fandom
I noticed that the same excuses, justifications, and questions that have come up in response to racism in fandom over the years appear in the notes for my post, so here’s a FAQ of sorts to address them. Hopefully, this will help people understand why these arguments don’t stand up to scrutiny and have something to refer to in lieu of writing a new reply every time someone says these things. 
Due to the length of this post, I made a Google doc for easier reading. Please note that several points are specific to the Marvel fandom and to the post linked above and are often M/M-focused (I explain why in that post), but generally speaking, the following can be applied to any fandom and various relationships. 
TABLE OF CONTENTS 
I can ship whatever I want. Stop being the fandom police!
Shipping isn’t activism. 
Fandom is supposed to be fun. Being told what to do or not to do isn’t fun.
I put a lot of different people in my works, and I do research about the groups they’re in. For example, I have a *marginalized group here* character (e.g., disabled), and I did research to represent them accurately. It’s not fair to say that I don’t care about diversity.
I don’t think people should write about POC if they’re white, just like I wouldn’t want anyone to talk about *insert topic you’re passionate about or interest group you’re in here* (e.g., the BDSM community) if they didn’t know anything about it.
I really don’t have any knowledge about what it’s like to be a POC, though, so maybe I’m not the best person for this. If POC want to see themselves represented, they should make their own works.
I’m not comfortable with writing POC as I’m unfamiliar with the struggles they experience. I don’t want my writing to come off as inauthentic, inaccurate, or offensive. Why are you saying it’s harmful to use this as a reason for abstaining from writing POC?
It doesn’t make sense to include every single POC in my work.
What you said and the data you have don’t necessarily point to racism. It might just be individual preference. I prefer certain ships over others, and it has nothing to do with race/I don’t see color.
A big part of what informs my shipping is physical attraction or interest in the characters.
I don’t ship _____ because I see them as brothers/sisters/siblings.
Some white characters and ships are popular in the MCU fandom because people bring in canon characterization or material from the comics to the character(s)/ship. Your MCU-only examination fails to account for ships with one character from the MCU and one from comics (e.g., MCU Bucky/616 Clint or Spideypool).
Some subfandoms just have fewer POC which means there will naturally be fewer ships featuring POC. To say that the Marvel fandom is racist as a whole is disingenuous; you can see how more diversity in the cast leads to more diverse ships in fanworks.
Some of the characters and ships are popular because white characters get the lion’s share of screen time and development or they appeared in canon earlier.
Is it racist to racebend a character?
Racist language in fics is more important than fandom representation.
My fanworks tend to focus on one ship and don’t really include other characters in general. When they do, the others mostly talk about that relationship. Am I falling into the trap you mentioned? 
I feel guilty about not including or writing about *character of color’s name here*.
How do I ensure that I don’t offend anyone if I include POC in my work?
What should I do to examine myself for any implicit biases?
The rest of the post is under the cut.
I can ship whatever I want. Stop being the fandom police!
As explicitly stated several times in my post, I agree that you can ship whatever you want. I’m not targeting a specific ship. I’m not telling you to stop shipping what you ship. All I’m asking is for everyone, including myself and other POC, to regularly examine ourselves for any implicit biases. If you’re a multishipper, are all of your ships in the fandom white? If you only have one ship and it’s white, are most or all of your ships in your other/previous fandoms white? Is the only media you consume predominantly or all white? 
Shipping isn’t activism. 
No, it isn’t and in many cases, shouldn’t be seen or treated as the same thing. However, by responding this way to POC who want to see themselves represented in fanworks more and not be ignored or written stereotypically, you’re telling us that our mere existence is a “political issue.” 
Fandom is supposed to be fun. Being told what to do or not to do isn’t fun.
It should be fun for us POC too, and it’s not when we’re consistently misrepresented or we don’t exist in this fandom. By using this as an excuse to exclude POC from your works, you’re saying that only some people are allowed to have fun or that having fun is conditional. Also, no one is forcing you as an individual to do or not do anything. See two paragraphs above.
I put a lot of different people in my works, and I do research about the groups they’re in. For example, I have a *marginalized group here* character (e.g., disabled), and I did research to represent them accurately. It’s not fair to say that I don’t care about diversity.
Just like you do research for those groups, you can easily do research on POC. Also, please be aware that this statement is similar to the “I’m not racist because I have a ___ friend/have a ___ person in my works” argument that many people use to prove they’re not racist, homophobic, sexist, etc. We aren’t interchangeable with other groups. 
I don’t think people should write about POC if they’re white, just like I wouldn’t want anyone to talk about *insert topic you’re passionate about or interest group you’re in here* (e.g., the BDSM community) if they didn’t know anything about it.
Something like BDSM is a lifestyle and preference. It is a choice. Being a POC isn’t. We can’t take off our identity every time we leave the house, the way you might keep it secret at work that you’re in the BDSM scene. 
I really don’t have any knowledge about what it’s like to be a POC, though, so maybe I’m not the best person for this. If POC want to see themselves represented, they should make their own works.
We do. Also, all of us fanwork creators make works with characters who are different from us all the time. Fandom is largely composed of people who aren’t straight cis men, yet the bulk of works on AO3 features characters who are canonically or implied to be straight cis men even if we end up changing that in our works. Most of us aren’t billionaires, but we don’t have a problem writing Tony. We don’t know what it’s like to be a WWII-soldier-turned-brainwashed-assassin who was kept in cryo for decades except when deployed on missions, but we don’t have a problem writing Bucky. The list goes on.
I’m not comfortable with writing POC as I’m unfamiliar with the struggles they experience. I don’t want my writing to come off as inauthentic, inaccurate, or offensive. Why are you saying it’s harmful to use this as a reason for abstaining from writing POC?
Your concern isn’t harmful. Reducing us to our trauma is, and you’re doing that if the reason you’re not comfortable with writing POC is that you don’t know how to write our struggles. We’re not only our pain. We’re more than that.
Not every fic has to be about the trauma of being a POC. We deserve to have fun, silly fics in addition to serious, plotty drama. We’re not thinking about our suffering 24/7 even if we do think about or are affected by it a lot. It’s not like if you write a Sam/Bucky fic, Sam is going to randomly lecture Bucky about the history of Black people in the U.S. and modern enslavement through the prison industrial complex while Bucky is trailing kisses down his neck in bed. We don’t need everyone being racist to MJ in a Pride and Prejudice AU. If you do want to include their struggles because that informs the way the characters think or act in your story, you can do so in ways that feel organic. 
Additionally, this is an excuse that we hear often; you may have heard it as people in Hollywood have used it to explain why they don’t have any, or at least any major, characters from marginalized groups in their works. If we allowed this excuse, an overwhelming majority of who we see in the media would be straight, cis white men considering who has power in the film and TV industry—and we would have to say that’s okay. We would have to say that the only people allowed to write about a certain group are members of that group, e.g., only women can write women. That’s not acceptable especially considering the gatekeeping, oppression, and high barriers to entry and success that make it difficult for marginalized people to even be in the room let alone make a name for themselves.
Fandom is no different. You’re saying that you can’t relate to POC because you’re white, but none of us POC have any problems making fanworks with white characters even though we don’t know what it’s like to be white. There are straight women who write fics about gay men and don’t feel uncomfortable doing so when they don’t know a single thing about being a gay man and the struggles of gay men (M/M can include bi or pan men, fics about gay men by straight women can sometimes include problematic portrayals, and straight men, queer women, and non-binary people write M/M too, but this is just an example).
You should be more careful when writing a POC if you're not a POC. The same goes for men writing women, cis people writing trans people, straight people writing queer people, able-bodied people writing disabled people, etc. However, there ARE ways to go about it, and while I understand the fear of messing up, the truth is everyone is racist, sexist, etc. Everyone including people in marginalized groups. Being a white lesbian doesn’t mean you can’t be racist. Being an Asian man doesn’t mean you can’t be sexist. You can see that within groups themselves. POC are not exempt from racism against other POC or from internalized racism against themselves or their own group. Women aren't free from internalized misogyny. The best we can do is to not make that prevent us from making inclusive works; if you make a mistake, which may happen, all we can ask is that you try your best to be open to feedback and grow. 
It doesn’t make sense to include every single POC in my work.
No one is telling you to. Choose characters who make sense for the story. Don’t choose them just so you have a POC in your work. We don’t want them to be tokenized. 
What you said and the data you have don’t necessarily point to racism. It might just be individual preference. I prefer certain ships over others, and it has nothing to do with race/I don’t see color.
This argument is identical to the “not all _____” rebuttal (“not all men,” “not all white people,” etc.) which places the blame on a few lone individuals and shifts the conversation away from an existing widespread problem. When there’s a consistent pattern and there are many examples of it both within the fandom and in other fandoms, it no longer is about individual preference. 
I urge you to consider the following:
If most people say they don’t write about or include a POC in their work because it’s too difficult or they’re afraid of making that character inauthentic, but they don’t seem to have an issue with writing other characters from groups they’re not in (e.g., if you’re a straight woman who writes a lot of M/M fics despite not knowing what it’s like to be a bi, pan, or gay man), doesn’t that say something?
If most people have the same reasons you do about not being interested in POC (e.g., “they’re not fleshed out enough” while being interested in or fleshing out minor white characters who get the same or even less development as those characters) or ships with POC (e.g., saying “they’re like brothers” while being interested in a white ship with similar dynamics and tropes or seeing why other people might ship it if you don’t), doesn’t that say something?
If most people give characters of color the same roles in their works even if that makes them OOC and/or the role reduces them to a (frequently stereotypical) trope, especially if they’re never fleshed out beyond that trope (e.g., the funny sidekick, wise friend who always helps or gives advice/free therapy, or responsible, mature, and sometimes stern friend who “parents” the protagonist), isn’t that saying something?
If race truly isn’t a factor for you when it comes to liking characters and ships, then this isn’t about you and you don’t have to distract people from the conversation by announcing that. That said, we should all look at characters and ships we like anyway instead of assuming that’s the case as that’s good practice. How much of your list is white? If it’s mostly or entirely white, why is that the case and why do you feel differently about ships of color?
A big part of what informs my shipping is physical attraction or interest in the characters.
What characters and actors do you find attractive or interesting? Are they all or mostly white? If they aren’t, are you drawn to any ships that include those POC? Refer to the section above.
I don’t ship _____ because I see them as brothers/sisters/siblings.
Part of this is preference as it comes down to perceived chemistry and relationship dynamics. However, POC are often not seen as romantic leads both in fanworks and the media and are just friends or “brothers/sisters” (this is why Crazy Rich Asians was a big deal). Sometimes, people even argue against POC being or having love interests in the name of diversity. You see this a lot with WOC in the media where the explanation against a love interest is “she’s a strong, independent woman who doesn’t need a man”; yes, they don’t and sometimes the story doesn’t need a romance, but WOC deserve love too and it’s strange that while white women can get the guy and be independent, WOC can’t and it somehow belittles or reduces them if they do. 
The way you can gauge whether it’s just preference at play or biases you may not have been aware of is to see how many relationships featuring a character of color fall under the “just friends/siblings” category for you, what you need to ship something, and how you feel about white ships with the same type of relationship or same lack of chemistry. For instance, you may say that there needs to be enough interaction for you to ship something and that’s why you don’t care much for Rhodey/Sam. Do you feel the same way about Clint/Coulson then, which has much less interaction (actually much less than Rhodey/Sam in this case)? If it’s about chemistry, are Steve and Sam just “brothers,” but Bruce and Thor aren’t or, if you don’t ship Bruce/Thor, you still “see it” and get why other people might be into it?
What do you ship, or what ships do you understand even if they’re not for you, and how is that different from ships that follow the same beats? Why are Steve and Bucky not brothers, but Rhodey and Tony are (there are many parallels between the two relationships—and one can argue the latter is more nuanced—than appears at first glance, and Rhodey/Tony can be just as sweet or angsty)? If you like the rivals/enemies-to-lovers or meet-ugly aspect to Steve/Tony, Sam/Bucky, Scott/Jimmy Woo, and M’Baku/T’Challa have that dynamic. You like that superior/subordinate-to-lovers dynamic that Clint/Coulson has? Coulson/Fury. Flirty meet-cutes or love/trust-at-first-sight? Steve/Sam.
Some white characters and ships are popular in the MCU fandom because people bring in canon characterization or material from the comics to the character(s)/ship. Your MCU-only examination fails to account for ships with one character from the MCU and one from comics (e.g., MCU Bucky/616 Clint or Spideypool).
I explained why I focused on the MCU here and that most of the fics that feature an MCU character and comics ’verse character tend to be heavily or entirely MCU-influenced here.
Also, characters of color exist in the comics, cartoons, and games too. By this logic, Steve/Sam and Rhodey/Tony should be juggernauts in the MCU fandom considering the depth and history of the characters and relationships. Ask yourself why people are happy to ship MCU Spideypool, to draw on the comics for that relationship and even bring a non-MCU character into the MCU and write him based on his comics history and characterization. Ask yourself why people are unhappy with MCU Clint’s terrible writing and lack of characterization and decide to give him his 616 (usually Fraction-era) characterization. And then ask yourself why people don’t do that for characters of color and then use “___ is a minor character/doesn’t have much development” as an excuse for why they’re uninteresting or not shippable with others.
There are many strong and interesting relationships in the comics, but only a few make it to the MCU fandom and almost all, if not all, of them are white.
Some subfandoms just have fewer POC which means there will naturally be fewer ships featuring POC. To say that the Marvel fandom is racist as a whole is disingenuous; you can see how more diversity in the cast leads to more diverse ships in fanworks.
It’s more important to see how many fanworks there are for ships of color in a fandom than how many ships of color there are in that fandom. See how few works there are for POC ships other than MJ/Peter in the MCU Spider-Man fandom despite the diversity of the cast. See how the most popular ships are white and three of them involve white characters from the Iron Man fandom (explain to me how Harley/Peter has over 1,000 works, but Ned/Peter has 436). 
And sure, you can say almost all of the Black Panther ships feature a character of color so there’s “more” diversity, but see how few works there are for them and how works with a white character fare compare to POC-only ships (almost all have 100-200 or fewer fics, with many having so few that I didn’t include them in the post, while BP ships with a white character have more works despite little to no interaction between the characters). 
Both of these, by the way, are critical and box office hits with characters who are clearly supposed to be the faces of the MCU now that the OG6 are gone. Black Panther is an award-winning critical and box office hit, and it is, more than any other film in MCU history, a huge cultural phenomenon with tremendous impact. It broke so many records and milestones, and it’s STILL breaking and making them. It has the most nuanced and balanced ensemble cast with side characters just as three-dimensional as the lead, a rarity in MCU films. Yet, its tag only has 3,966 works, fewer in total for the whole fandom than some of the white M/M ships on this list. Even if you account for BP fanworks that may have been tagged as MCU instead of BP, the number is paltry as you can see in this post. People simply do not want to make fanworks for characters of color (in this case, specifically Black characters) and don’t. It’s not about how diverse or successful a film is.
Some of the characters and ships are popular because white characters get the lion’s share of screen time and development or they appeared in canon earlier.
Yes, that’s true, but fandom has no problem catapulting white ships with minor characters into extreme popularity. See Clint/Coulson. See fics prioritizing Happy and having him show up more than Rhodey in Steve/Tony fics. 
It’s not about chronology. Many ships of color came before white ships as a whole and before white ships with the same white character they have. See Bucky/Clint vs. Bucky/Sam. 
Lastly, please don’t tell me how certain white M/M ships came to be to explain how they’re exempt or how I’m failing to consider other factors for their popularity. I’ve been in the fandom since 2012, and I’ve seen almost all of the white ships in the fandom be born or boom into popularity. Don’t try to explain, for instance, that Clint/Coulson is big because Coulson has his own show and his fans followed him from the show (this logic falls flat when you look at something like Luke Cage); that ship became huge way before that happened and way before Agents of Shield became “big.” Also, see the section above regarding screen time, development, and fame. 
Is it racist to racebend a character? 
People’s opinions differ on racebending—and often that comes from personal background and on the situation—so I can’t speak on anyone’s behalf. However, I think everyone can agree on the following:
Racebending a white character is not the same thing as whitewashing a POC. For example, making Tony Stark Indian vs. turning T’Challa white or as canonical examples, making Fury black in Ultimates and the MCU vs. making the Ancient One or the Maximoffs white. The latter (whitewashing T’Challa, the Ancient One, and the Maximoff twins) is racist for various reasons. There’s a long history of POC being erased and white people taking roles from POC, a huge imbalance in representation between white people and POC, the unfortunate perception by the public and media that “white = neutral/standard” (Bruce’s whiteness doesn’t define his characterization and development), and the way race plays a role in influencing the way POC feel, act, and are treated.
Racebending a POC from one ethnicity or racial group to another is also problematic as we’re not interchangeable. Hollywood often does this and goes, “But they’re still a POC! We’re being diverse!” 
In general, people who racebend white characters to POC want to see more POC in canon and in the media! These aren’t mutually exclusive.
Sometimes people racebend because they’re not represented at all in their works. (This happens with other marginalized groups too; for instance, some people make cis characters trans in their fanworks as there are few to no trans characters in the canonical source.) For example, there are, as of now, no Latinx superheroes in the MCU films. Even if people wanted to, they can’t make works with an MCU Latinx superhero unless they bring one from the comics or the one Latinx superhero from Agents of Shield (if they know the comics or AoS), make a minor Latinx film character like Luis a superhero, or racebend their favorite white character and put a fresh spin on the character, drawing from their personal experience and background.
There’s a massive difference between fans racebending a character and a creator taking credit by pretending they viewed a character as non-white or didn’t see race all along when it’s clear that the character is canonically white (this is different from a creator saying they support anyone, POC or white, playing that character onscreen or onstage). 
Racist language in fics is more important than fandom representation.
We don’t have to pick our battles. Both are important! I focused on fandom representation as it’s much more quantifiable and easy to find and analyze data for than racist language on a fandom-wide scale on my own without any tools. You’re right that the latter is a problem as is racist representation in fanworks, though. 
My fanworks tend to focus on one ship and don’t really include other characters in general. When they do, the others mostly talk about that relationship. Am I falling into the trap you mentioned?
If the story is about a relationship (examining that relationship and the feelings of the characters in it) and there isn’t much of a plot outside of that, then that makes sense. However, even in situations like this, consider how much time you dedicate to characters of color vs. white characters. If the story is about a ship featuring a POC, do you spend more time on the white character of that relationship? Their white friends and how they feel about that relationship? If it’s about a white ship, do white side characters appear more than side characters of color even if the latter have a closer relationship with the protagonists? For example, does Wanda show up more than Sam or play a bigger role than him in a Steve/Bucky fic? Do you have Pepper show up all the time (or even Happy), but Rhodey is chronically absent? Do only the white characters get to be more than the tropes you’re using, if you’re using any, while the POC don’t get to be nuanced? Are there any stereotypes that you’re reducing the POC to?
I feel guilty about not including or writing about *character of color’s name here*.
See “It doesn’t make sense to include every single POC in my work.” Include the character(s) who make sense for the story, perspective you’re writing/drawing from if applicable, and central group or ship if this is a ship-specific work. For example, if you’re drawing the Avengers and you include the newer Avengers, Rhodey and Sam should appear too, not just Wanda, Scott, Bucky, and/or Carol (this happens a lot). If you’re writing a Tony POV fic that includes other characters, depending on the story, it may make sense that Sam doesn’t appear much as he and Tony aren’t close whereas he would in a Steve POV fic.
How do I ensure that I don’t offend anyone if I include POC in my work?
You can’t ensure anything as POC aren’t a monolith, but you can try to be as informed as possible and avoid common pitfalls while writing. You can do research, just the way you might research anything you’re not familiar with. You can ask if anyone is willing to do a sensitivity read while you write or before you post. You can look for betas. There are a lot of resources out there, but these are good places to start if you’re looking for more information and help:
Writing with Color - resources
Writing with Color - Stereotypes and Tropes page
Reference for Writers - POC tag
What should I do to examine myself for any implicit biases?
We should all take stock of:
our feelings about different characters and relationships, both platonic and romantic, who we prioritize in our works, and how much they’re prioritized
our decision whether or not to seek or make content with characters of color. This includes content for white ships because sometimes every white character in the MCU shows up as a side character, but characters of color don’t or all of the white characters play bigger roles than the POC despite how close they are to the protagonist(s)
the way we interpret and write/draw those characters. For example, is Sam a yes-man? A figurative or literal therapist for white friends? The bro who only cracks jokes and/or gives sage advice but seems to not have any flaws, struggles, or life of his own outside of his white friends? The BFF who thinks his white best friend is being ridiculous about another white guy and wants them to get their act together already? Does the character of color talk in the way you perceive everyone of that race to talk rather than the way they personally do (e.g., does Luis randomly and awkwardly switch into Spanish when he talks just because he’s Latinx despite never speaking Spanish with Scott? Does Sam use AAVE with Steve, Bucky, and Natasha when he doesn’t do that with them?)? 
Also, here’s a Google doc with more anti-racist resources.
Even well-meaning people can slip up or not be as proactive as they hoped they would be so it’s just good practice to check in with ourselves every once in a while and see if there’s anything we missed or didn’t notice.
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arcticdementor · 3 years ago
Link
The University of California system is getting rid of its SAT/ACT requirement. More will follow.
There’s a lot to say. First, we must distinguish between two types of tests, or really two types of testing. When people say “standardized tests,” they think of the SAT, but they also think of state-mandated exams (usually bought, at great taxpayer expense, from Pearson and other for-profit companies) that are designed to serve as assessments of public K-12 schools, of aggregates and averages of students. The SAT, ACT, GRE, GMAT, LSAT, MCAT, and similar tests are oriented towards individual ability or aptitude; they exist to show prerequisite skills to admissions officers. (And, in one of the most essential purposes of college admissions, to employers, who are restricted in the types of testing they can perform thanks to Griggs v Duke Power Co.) Sure, sometimes researchers will use SAT data to reflect on, for example, the fact that there’s no underlying educational justification for higher graduation rates1, but SATs are really about the individual. State K-12 testing is about cities and districts, and exists to provide (typically dubious) justification for changes to education policy2. SATs and similar help admissions officers sort students for spots in undergraduate and graduate programs. This post is about those predictive entrance tests like the SAT.
Liberals repeat several types of myths about the SAT/ACT with such utter confidence and repetition that they’ve become a kind of holy writ. But myths they are.
1. SATs/ACTs don’t predict college success. They do, indeed. This one is clung to so desperately by liberals that you’d think there was some sort of compelling empirical basis to believe this. There isn’t. There never has been. They’re making it up. They want it to be true, and so they believe it to be true.
2. The SATs only tell you how well a student takes the SAT. This is perhaps a corollary to 1., and is equally wrong. They tell us what they were designed to tell us: how well students are likely to perform in college. But the SATs tell us about much more than college success. Let me run this graphic again.
3. SATs just replicate the income distribution. No. Again, asserted with utter confidence by liberals despite overwhelming evidence that this is not true. I believe that this research represents the largest publicly-available sample of SAT scores and income information, with an n of almost 150,000, and the observed correlation between family income and SAT score is .25. This is not nothing. It is a meaningful predictor. But it means that the large majority of the variance in SAT scores is not explainable by income information. A correlation of .25 means that there are vast numbers of lower-income students outperforming higher-income students. Other analyses find similar correlations. If SAT critics wanted to say that “there is a relatively small but meaningful correlation between family income and SAT scores and we should talk about that,” fair game. But that’s not how they talk. The routinely make far stronger claims than that in an effort to dismiss these tests all together, such as here by Yale’s Paul Bloom. (Whose work I generally like.) It’s just not that hard to correlate two variables together, guys. I don’t know why you wouldn’t ever ask yourselves “is this thing I constantly assert as absolute fact actually true?” Well, maybe I do.
In general, progressive and left types routinely overstate the power of the relationship between family wealth and academic performance on all manner of educational outcomes. The political logic is obvious: if you generally want to redistribute money (as I do) then the claim that educational problems are really economic problems provides ammo for your position. But the fact that there is a generic socioeconomic effect does not mean that giving people money will improve their educational outcomes very much, particularly if richer people are actually mildly but consistently better at school than poorer for sorting reasons that are not the direct product of differences in income. That is, what correlation does exist between SES and academic indicators might simply be the metrics accurately measuring the constructs they were designed to measure.
And throwing money at our educational problems, while noble in intent, hasn’t worked. (People react violently to this, but for example poorer and Blacker public schools receive significantly higher per-pupil funding than richer and whiter schools, which should not be a surprise given that the policy apparatus has been shoveling money at the racial performance gap for 40 years.) All manner of major interventions in student socioeconomic status, including adoption into dramatically different home and family conditions, have failed to produce the benefits you’d expect if academic outcomes were a simple function of money. I believe in redistribution as a way to ameliorate the consequences of poor academic performance. There is no reason to think that redistribution will ameliorate poor academic performance itself.
5. SATs are easily gamed with expensive tutoring. They are not. This one is perhaps less empirically certain than the prior two and on which I’m most amenable to counterargument, but the preponderance of the evidence seems clear to me in saying that the benefits of tutoring/coaching for these tests are vastly overstated. Again, a simplistic proffered explanation for a troublesome set of facts that then implies simplistic solutions that would not work.
6. Going test optional increases racial diversity. This one, I think, must be called scientifically unsettled. However both Sweitzer, Blalock, and Sharma and Belasco, Rosinger, and Hearn find no appreciable increase in racial diversity after universities go test-optional. “Holistic” application criteria like admissions essays almost certainly benefit richer students anyway. What’s more, we have to ask ourselves what “diversity” really means in this context. Private colleges and universities keep the relevant data close to the vest, for obvious reasons, but it’s widely believed that many elite schools satisfy their internal diversity goals for Black students by aggressively pursuing wealthy Kenyan and Nigerian international students, whose parents have the means to be the kind of reliable donors that such schools rely on so heavily. I’m not aware of a really comprehensive study that examines this issue, and it would be hard to pull off, but the relevant question is “do various policies intended to improve diversity on campus actually increase the enrollment of American-born descendants of African slaves?” I can’t say, but you can guess where my suspicions lie.
All of that is prologue to the bigger point: the controversy over college entrance examinations stems not from the examinations themselves, but from the fact that they reveal profound differences in human capital that make progressives uncomfortable. The SATs don’t create inequality. They reveal inequality.
The racial achievement/performance gap is a curious thing even in the context of an American political discourse that seems to get more bizarre by the day. That the gap exists is, on balance, not controversial. Gaps in performance are observed on essentially every measured academic metric, though the size of the effects vary from context to context, and the general distribution is Asian American students at the top, white students next, then Hispanic, then Black. The Black-white gap in particular has shrunk from the era of (explicitly) segregated schools but progress has not been consistent or linear. Most people in academia and politics admit it exists: prominent Black politicians like Barack Obama and Kamala Harris reference it, every major think tank and foundation operating in the educational space identifies it as a major priority, and the NAACP used to address if often, though their Education and Education Strategy pages have recently disappeared so it’s hard to know where they stand now. These things are faddish but once upon a time every other dissertation written by someone getting a PhD in Education was about the gap. We can observe it even outside of reference to controversial tests, such as noting that the white high school graduation rate is 10% higher than that for Black students. The achievement gap is a thing.
And yet I also find a rapidly-congealing social prohibition against talking about these gaps in progressive spaces. If you refer to a racial achievement gap in a lot of liberal or left contexts now, you’ll find that people clam up fast and get visibly uncomfortable, even if you take pains to point out that an academic achievement gap does not imply an academic potential gap. People just don’t want to acknowledge that gaps exist at all; our racial discourse appears to have become such a blunt instrument that the acknowledgement of racial difference is controversial even when you preface discussion with the belief (that I hold) that the gap is the product of innumerable environmental and sociocultural factors rather than genetics or other inherent differences. Simply saying “Black students consistently score lower on tests like the SATs, have lower average GPAs, and have worse metrics on ancillary concerns like truancy” - again, Barack Obama’s position, Kamala Harris’s position, Cory Booker’s position - is enough for people to start launching into harangues about the inherent violence of those comparisons. People just do not want to talk about this stuff.
Those concerns with group differences, at least, have some sort of basic political logic and are amenable to complaints that they are the product of systemic inequality. (They are, but not the inequalities that people think, and again the SAT gap is a result of systemic inequality, not a cause of systemic inequality.) More disturbing to me is the rise of resistance within academia to the notion of inequalities between individuals. When I was in grad school more than a half-decade ago, I observed with some considerable unhappiness that it had become increasingly socially unacceptable to speak of some students as simply better students than others, as being more talented, harder working, or more prepared. All of this was seen as inegalitarian and, eventually, as “white supremacist” even if every student being compared in a given context was white. There were many instructors back then who bragged about giving all students As, etc., and I must assume this practice has only grown over time. In the humanities and social sciences especially there is a growing movement to reject assessment, including grading - the means through which we sort better students from worse - as the hand of illegitimate power that “does violence” to the students who voluntarily attend college.
Of course, that complicity in the neoliberal machine is not some recent injustice; it is the very reason that colleges and universities are funded by our society at all. If this trend continues, not just eliminating SAT requirements or increasingly refusing to hierarchize students with grades but in rejecting the entire sorting function of the university, academia will collapse. Wealthy parents aren’t paying Harvard to enrich their children in the humanistic sense. They’re paying Harvard to act as a marker of their child’s superiority in the labor market and the social hierarchy. Employers value college because it provides at least some meaningful information about who will succeed as a worker; remove that function and the financial justification for a hideously expensive system dies. I would love if education dropped its association with meritocracy, but that cannot occur within our current system. The professors who self-aggrandize through their rejection of their hierarchizing function, if successful, would cause the doom of the modern university. (These tenured radicals, of course, never are so moved by the inherent inequities of academia that they quit the profession.)
Today, it is somehow controversial to say “some people are smarter than others,” a reflection of one of the simple brute realities of human life and something that has been accepted as true for thousands of years.
Here is the essence of it: hierarchies of relative academic performance are remarkably stable throughout life, due to differences in inherent or intrinsic academic ability of whatever origin, and the SATs and similar mechanisms reveal those differences in a way that liberal America is increasingly unable to accept. This is the source of all of this angst, not the technical details of whether a test is fair or valid or just, but a liberal intelligentsia that is incapable of honestly confronting the fact that different human beings have fundamentally different intrinsic abilities. I believe in political equality, social equality, equality of rights, equality of dignity, equality of protection under the law. But the notion that all people are equally talented, in academics or anything else, is an absurdity, and as much as people will rush to deny intrinsic difference, I suspect that pretty much everybody knows that they are real. When you were a child you casually assumed that some of your classmates were naturally better at school than others, and you did because it was true.
This is the conversation that I tried, and failed, to force with my book: left-of-center political movements, from center-left to radically socialist, cannot achieve the goal of the greater good for everyone, including greater political and economic equality, while pretending that we believe in equality of human ability. The only way to intelligently address various social, economic, and political equalities related to differences in human potential is to acknowledge that those differences exist. The current rending of garments regarding inequalities within our education system has led to certifiably bizarre situations like the movement, currently gathering steam, to teach math as if it is as subjective as literature or art. But this won’t make Black kids or poor kids or girls or anyone else actually better at math. And if the universities really give up their function of creating an academic hierarchy for political reasons, employers will find new systems that do that, or a lot of people will get hired and quickly fired for not being competent. This is not an intelligent policy approach. Getting rid of the SATs won’t make unprepared kids prepared. It won’t make naturally untalented students naturally talented. It won’t make kids who aren’t smart into smart kids. All it will do is hide the reality of those unpleasant inequalities.
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fallenfurther · 3 years ago
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TAG Minibang 2021
I had the pleasure of being partnered with @godsliltippy for the @tagminibang.
Click here to see @godsliltippy's amazing picture which goes with this fic, in which Scott and Gordon spend some time together on Thunderbird Four. I had great fun putting these two in a confined space and I hope you enjoy what came about. Enjoy!
The Refresher
Scott slipped the box of food rations into the compartment next to a large unopened box of celery crunch bars. He rolled his eyes knowing there were more scattered throughout the craft. He wondered how many of the fresh supplies his brother would consume with his favourite alternative present. Virgil had expressed concern on more than one occasion about Gordon's diet on extended underwater expeditions, but Scott tried not to pry too much. The aquanaut never seemed to suffer any ill effects. The man in question strode into the submarine with a grin and air of authority, tapping the button to close the airlock without a backwards glance. The mechanism clicking into place, sealing them in.
"Ready to learn the ropes?" Gordon cheered, eagerly rubbing his gloved hands together.
"It's a refresher course with a small mapping expedition for the Environmental Agency added on."
"Trust me Scott, this baby is nothing like Thunderbird One. She handles better, is calmer and still nippy when required. I'll be taking her out first, I want to get her there on schedule and in one piece."
Scott sighed, wanting to quip back about how he was the one who always brought her back in pieces, but knew it was still too raw for his brother. Shutting the compartment, with a little more force than necessary, he followed Gordon into the cockpit and sat in the temporary seat behind the man. His eyes scanned the area and he was pleased to see no wrappers on the floor. Kayo had warned them about the mess after her last excursion in Thunderbird Four, however they were all aware of what Gordon was like. It was nice to see he had tidied up beforehand, so at least Scott would only have to deal with fresh mess. The aquanaut started running through the prelaunch checks, and Scott ticked each one off his mental checklist. The submarine jolted as the mechanism started to lower them into the water tank and the exit hatch came into view. The lock disengaged, the doors opened before them as the submarine's engines started to rumble behind them. The vibrations grew as the pitch changed and the machine propelled itself forward.
"Thunderbird Four is go!"
"FAB," John responded, "try not to kill him, Scott."
Scott grinned while Gordon feigned hurt, a hand leaving the controls to cover his heart. It was a running family joke, all of them having been cooped up with Gordon at some point. Although Alan swore blind their trip to Europa was the worst, but at least Thunderbird Three was large enough to have some mild privacy and space. Everything was pokey on Thunderbird Four, particularly the toilet. It thankfully had a privacy screen but there was barely enough room to stand up, let alone unzip their uniforms. It probably explained why John had been graced with Gordon's bottom on his last refresher. Why use a screen when you're the only one on board, was Gordon's response. When John had pointed out his own presence Gordon had said he was making John feel more at home by showing him the moon. John did report that Gordon had used the screen for the rest of their trip. Scott hoped he would be spared the same treatment. Sitting back, Scott observed his brother at the controls as they entered the open ocean. The sonar gently flashed to Gordon's left, relaying occasional glimpses of hazards and giving a reasonably detailed map of the sea bed. The little yellow arrow that indicated their craft stayed steady on the red line of the plotted course. It crossed Scott's mind that they would have been at their destination by now had they been on Thunderbird One. Rolling his shoulders, Scott sat back, stretched his feet out before him and tried to relax. It was going to be a long first day.
The morning was interspersed with sporadic bouts of chatter from Gordon. Scott smiled as he listened, making the right noises and offering his opinions when required. He didn't share his brother's enthusiasm for the sea, but had great respect for his knowledge and experience as Gordon identified the various creatures which passed the craft. With one of Four's tablets in his lap, Scott inputted the sightings into the database alongside the GPS coordinates, ready to be submitted after the trip was complete. There was no need to report them straight away and to do so would give away Thunderbird Four's position and possibly bring unwanted attention. John and EOS monitored many websites where enthusiasts shared their Thunderbird sightings, marking possible hot spots on maps and predicting flight paths. Apparently there had been many meetups, a few of which had successfully predicted a Thunderbird sighting. EOS was certain it was coincidental, but precautions were taken after a holidaying oceanographer tracked Thunderbird Four down using Gordon's data. International Rescue promptly stopped submitting data, instead switching between five umbrella accounts. This trip's data was being submitted by Dippy, the personal deep water submarine of Doctor R Yang. Scott hadn't been too impressed with Gordon's suggestion of Doctor Angry, but EOS had suggested Doctor R Yang as a suitable plausible alternative and assured him that would be unlikely to be questioned. Gordon also managed to wrangle a sea themed one as well, much to Scott's displeasure.
Scott retrieved lunch, eating his first before taking the helm. His hand slipped into the holds, his body shifting at the unfamiliarity of the position. Pulling on the controls the machine continued on. Scott's eyes were glued to the sonar, adjusting the propulsion when the craft deviated from course.
"Relax, Scott. You're making it harder on yourself. Small subtle adjustments is all you need." Gordon butted in after the seventh course correction in the ten minutes Scott had been piloting. "There are no flight paths to worry about. A little deviation from the line isn't going to hurt and EOS will even autocorrect it if you stray too far."
Scott loosened his grip on the controls, allowing the blood to run back into his white knuckles. His shoulders slumped. Why was it so different to pilot Thunderbird Four when on a rescue? He swore it was never this hard, or maybe he just never noticed how tense he was or the small things he was doing wrong. The memory of Gordon instructing him from Tracy Island when retrieving the escape pod came to mind. Taking a deep breath, Scott twisted the controls, taking a large arch to get back on course.
"I know you fly Thunderbird One blind, but you should be able to look up and out the window while steering Thunderbird Four. You'll be surprised by what you can see, especially on a leisure journey like this."
"This is a training exercise."
"Exactly, it's for practicing. There's no rush. We have time to get you feeling relaxed at the helm, to let you learn the way she feels and responds."
Scott sat back, making the most of the ergonomic seat, knowing that Gordon was right. Knowing he'd said the same thing when he'd been refreshing Gordon on Thunderbird One. Despite his carefree joking nature, Gordon knew when to be serious and he had tensed up at the controls of Thunderbird One. Virgil had pointed out later that night that just Scott's presence watching would have put Gordon off. Much like Alan tried to please, putting in his all to prove his worth, there were still times when Gordon wanted to impress his older brother and not let him down. Thankfully, a few hours in the sky, and some practice launching and descending had Gordon handling Thunderbird One with ease. Pride had filled Scott, seeing how well Gordon had recovered from his injuries and how easily he slipped back into International Rescue. His younger brother had a unique way of bouncing back and his resilience made him seem indestructible.
Scott flicked his attention back to the here and now. His hands still grasped the controls a little too firmly, but he started flicking his eyes between the projection and water around them. To his untrained eye, the lamps barely illuminated anything and there was nothing to see. Gordon however seemed to spot things he couldn't. By the end of the journey, Scott's arms were aching from the consistent outstretched position and was thankful when Gordon took over. Rolling his shoulders and stretching out his arms, he took the seat behind Gordon. In Thunderbird One there was no need for stamina as she was never in flight for long. Clicking his shoulder brought some relief.
"You'll get used to it," Gordon responded to the sound.
Scott rolled his eyes knowing too well he would never be in Thunderbird Four long enough to become used to it. It was one long training dive a year, with day refreshers as and when required. Gordon guided the craft towards the surface. Finally Scott could see clearly through the glass. Before them was a vast coastline that contained various caves that required remapping. They were a long way from the nearest city, though the nearest settlement wasn't much closer. Gordon guided the submarine along until they came to the buoy which marked the entrance to the caves. Submerging again, Gordon spiralled them around the buoy's line until they were fifteen meters down before clamping onto the metal cable. A light flashed green.
"All secure. Let's grab some grub before turning in. I know it's early but I know you barely slept thanks to that rescue."
Scott was about to complain when he yawned. Gordon was right, he had barely slept the night before, having run around after the rescue getting everything ready for this trip. Scott followed his brother out the back, ducking through the hatch.
"I bet times like these you wished Thunderbird Four was as spacious as Stingray."
Scott chanced the conversation. Since the hydrofoil accident Gordon had been less forthcoming with details about his time in WASP. It had bonded them at first, Scott's military service giving him an understanding about what Gordon was going through, with his younger brother messaging him for advice on occasion. It frizzled out towards the end as they both got busy, something Scott regretted. Gordon paused, but gave his brother a grin as he grabbed two ration packs from the box Scott had brought.
"Nah. Sure, you get your own room, but you also have to deal with Troy. I was right next to his room and his late night visitors weren't always quiet. I miss relaxing with the guys though. Marina and Phones were a blast. We had some good times together."
Scott only just caught the packet thrown his way, catching it by the edge between two fingers. Gordon chuckled as he headed to the hot water dispenser.
"I gotta keep you on your toes."
Scott followed the aquanaut, rubbing his hand through his brother's hair as he moved out the way.
"Hey!" Gordon squawked, cradling his food as he attempted to duck.
Scott ignored the complaint, filling his own pack and noting he'd been thrown beef bourguignon, mash and peas. He already knew Gordon would have Mac and Cheese without looking. Scott had deliberately only brought one along as well as removing the can of squirty cheese from its hiding place. There was only so much Scott could tolerate in a confined space and they were set to be down here a while. They sat in two of the rescue seats and ate off their laps. There was no need for formalities when living in confined quarters.
"This always reminds me of survival training. Eating out of packets perched on a rock or stump, though I'm glad Brains makes them taste better. We were always told that they are called survival rations, not gourmet food-to-go."
Gordon nodded, chewing his current mouthful. A smile crossed his face.
"I lost a bet with Troy during my …. second week on Stingray. He made me eat survival rations for a day. I didn't know they came in different flavours as he only gave me one choice; beef stew. Tasted like cardboard. I got him back though."
"Sounds familiar," Scott chuckled, scraping out the last of his meal. He threw the packet in the trash and grabbed the bag of cookies he'd stowed away. His brother's eyes lit up. Scott ripped it open and deposited two into his awaiting hand before taking two himself. He sealed them up and tucked them away, knowing they'd probably be gone by tomorrow night. He retrieved two hammocks and blankets from one of the underfloor storage holds and handed one of each to Gordon. Unravelling the strong yellow material, he clipped it to the holds in the ceiling before grabbing his wash bag and heading to the sink. He watched as Gordon sorted out his own hammock before joining Scott at the small sink. It was a little cramped, the two of them leaning down to make sure they actually spat into the bowl, but it worked. With no need to change clothes, being in such a small submarine required them to be ready for a leak at any point, so Scott climbed into his bed for the night. It took him a moment to get comfortable, his body not used to the feeling of being cradled by fabric. Beside him Gordon had hopped into his and was swinging gently.
"Like the sailors of old, we sleep in our hammocks and are rocked to sleep by the sea."
There was a crunch and Scott sighed. He had no idea where it had come from but it didn't matter. Brains had found celery crunch bars all over the craft during maintenance.
"Keep it to one. I don't want to be woken by you crunching throughout the night."
"Spoil sport," Gordon grumbled, before peeking over the yellow material at Scott with a grin. "Fancy a sea shanty?"
Scott groaned, hands grasping his head, as laughter filled the submarine. The main lights were turned off as Gordon started singing, a small light on his side of the submarine casting him in an eerie green glow. It was going to be a long week.
********
"Okay, we need to head down the left tunnel."
Gordon watched as Scott turned the controls. His brother was coping well considering Scott wasn't the most patient person and was used to making larger, brasher movements. His brother did have laser focus though, eyes glued to the sonar where a small version on the submarine was actively being projected in real time. Gordon has given up telling Scott to not rely on it solely, old habits dying hard. Granted, it was day three of their trip and they had just entered the deeper, smaller caverns having mapped the larger ones yesterday. The muscles beneath Scott's uniform were a mass of stiff tense knots as the man guided the machine around a tight bend. The caves weren't particularly small by his standards but for someone unused to the kind of manipulation required to transverse them, they were constricting. Brains had already mentioned to Gordon that he had plenty of fresh paint ready for when they got back. He had laughed at the engineer's lack of confidence, but had been grateful all the same. There were already a few spots on Thunderbird Four that needed a touch up, and by the way Scott was turning the craft, there was about to be another.
Gordon sat back, trying not to say anything and let his brother learn. He watched his brother make a small adjustment, a little overzealous increase in the starboard turbine impeller which tipped her nose a little too far to the left, making contact with rock inevitable. The submarine edged forward. Scott realised what was happening and tried to correct it. The nose rose away from the rock wall and towards the center of the tunnel. Gordon could see the tension in the man's jaw increase, which he didn’t think was possible. Just as Scott thought he'd saved it, there was the tell-tale clunk of rock hitting metal near the back of the craft and a thankfully short screech as it scratched the hull. Scott growled in frustration, twisting the controls and setting Thunderbird Four onto a straight course through the tunnel while turning off the engine. Instead he let the craft drift and put his head in his hands. Gordon gave his brother time, watching the man’s fingers twist and scrape their way through normally neat styled hair. Gordon reached out and placed a hand on Scott's shoulder.
"You're getting there. These aren't easy tunnels and they are unknown to you."
"I …" Scott's hand slipped down his face, "I should be able to do this. I'm sorry I've scratched her."
Gordon swallowed. Scott rarely showed vulnerability, and especially not to him. Despite having Dad back, his brother still shouldered too much, and this just showed how close to breaking point he had been. Maybe Scott needed this time away more than he'd like to admit.
"Scratches can be buffed out and painted over," Gordon spoke softly as he knelt beside his brother, "I've given her a fair few over the years."
Scott's hair was poking out of fists now and all Gordon could do was wrap his arms around the man and be there. He rested his chin against tense muscles and gazed into the corner of the cockpit. His eyes started picking out small details, like a smudge of oil at the bottom of the wall where Virgil had touched it during the last biannual maintenance. His brother often helped Brains if he was free and it had been quiet on the rescue front, and Brains wouldn't have let his hands get so dirty. There was a sliver of a celery crunch bar wrapper poking out from around the edge of the small storage compartment which also held a first aid kit. He could spot the grime he'd missed in the clean he'd done. Gordon felt the rise and fall of Scott's shoulders as he shifted his head so he could glimpse the sonar out the corner of his eye. They were still suspended in the middle of the tunnel, Thunderbird Four's buoyancy keeping her from sinking to the rocky floor. Gordon had no idea how long they were like that, and didn't care to know, but Scott finally took a deep breath and straightened up. There was a steely look in his eyes and a new resolve in the way he grasped the controls. Gordon sat back as Thunderbird Four's turbines started turning again.
"I'm only going to improve by keeping at it." There was conviction in the man voice, "I'll set some time aside on Tuesday to buff out all the scratches "
"I'm sure Brains will be happy to do it."
Scott opened and closed his mouth. They both knew Brains would be quicker and more efficient than Scott, who rarely had to buff anything out of Thunderbird One. The cockpit was silent as Scott concentrated, slowly making his way along the tunnels. Gordon gave the odd directional instruction, trying to leave the man to it. There had been a few more swear words during Scott's attempt to turn around at a dead end, having added a few more small scratches to the paintwork. He gradually became faster as his confidence slowly grew as they headed deeper into the system.
"Should we think about turning around?"
Gordon grabbed the tablet and compared their current section to the thirty two year old map produced on the last official excursion. There was only one more tunnel off of this section and he agreed they could probably call it a day. Scott was in need of some time away from the controls.
*******
Scott stretched as he vacated the seat and handed it over to Gordon. He had to bend to stretch his arms out completely, but he did so with a yawn. His body was stiff from being in the same position for so long. Without any guilt he left Gordon to turn the submarine around and headed out back to grab some water. He filled up his standard issue water bottle, a blue iR embossed metal canister, from the tap and greedily gulped half of it. After refilling it, he also filled Gordon's and headed back. As much as he wanted to lie down and try and ease the tension from his muscles, he didn't want to leave Gordon alone. His brother thrived with company, often resorting to telling jokes over the comm when he was alone. Scott placed the canister in its slot on the main seat before sitting down.
Gordon had pulled up the quickest route out the cavern system and had started to leave the tunnel Scott had just finished scanning. As they reached the main tunnel Thunderbird Four's pace increased, it was still slow for the craft but a fair bit faster than Scott had been comfortable to go when he was in control. Gordon didn't bat an eyelid, eyes focused on the rock that passed by the window. His brother's hands gripped the controls in a firm but relaxed manner, his movements were smooth, subtle and the submarine reacted similarly. She glided through the tunnels like she'd been traversing them for years, though Scott knew she hadn't. Gordon was confident at the helm, taking tight turns at speeds that worried Scott to the point he sat back in his seat and held on. It felt strange to be a lover of speed, getting a thrill from being forced back into his seat, yet being uncomfortable that they were going so fast while going so slow.
Thunderbird Four smoothly rounded a junction where Scott had scratched her, her frame tilting with the angle of the turn. Scott was mesmerized by his brother's faultless handling. Glancing at the map, Scott saw the dip coming up which narrowed considerably afterwards. Gordon wasn't perturbed, gliding into the dip and pulling her up with pace. The rock below was clearly visible in the light and the odd protrusion came so close Scott swore they would brush against it. They didn't. Thankfully Gordon reduced his speed as the tunnel narrowed, but at no point did worry or concern cross the man's face. He glided the Thunderbird through the tunnels as if it had been designed solely for the purpose. It had taken them the best part of seven hours to get to the point they had, granted they, he, had been taking it slow due to the nature of their task, however a mere forty minutes of skilled piloting later and they burst into the open ocean once again. Relief filled Scott who hadn't realised how much the close confines of the caves had been affecting him. Gordon took them up to the surface and bright sunlight burst through forcing Scott to cover his eyes.
"Thought we deserved a bit of fresh air."
Gordon gave Scott a cheeky grin as he started putting the submarine in standby. The waves sparkled as they lapped at the hull. Gordon activated the seat allowing him to do some acrobatics to get into the main compartment. Scott rolled his eyes at his brother's antics and followed him. Gordon opened up one of the compartments and started rummaging. Scott leant against the other side, crossed his arms and took in his brother. A proud smile spread across his face. They each had their own set of skills and he had just witnessed what a competent aquanaut could do. WASP must have been gutted when he hadn't returned after his recovery. Even if they didn't let him on Stingray, Gordon's skills would have still been a great addition to the force. Instead, he'd joined his brothers in their Dad's legacy, becoming their only aquanaut. Scott was proud of all his brothers but it was moments like this, when they unintentionally showed off how amazing they were, that made their sacrifices worth it.
Gordon turned around with an armful of snacks and fizzy drinks, and Scott couldn't help but laugh. His brother sauntered to the airlock and Scott hurried to open it, picking up the treat that had fallen to the floor. The fresh crisp sea air wafted in and Scott's lungs breathed deeply. There was land to their left and open water to their right. Gordon plonked himself down and dropped his legs into the water. Scott sat beside him, crossing his legs not wanting to spend the next few days with salt stuck to them. He playfully slapped Gordon on the head with the celery crunch bar he'd dropped before swapping it with a bottle of cola.
********
"Okay, with this next turn you have to glide in pointing towards the corner then pulling round as the front gets to the bend."
Scott set his eyes on the corner, trying to visualise the curve Gordon wanted him to take. After yesterday's disaster Scott was determined to reduce the amount of scratches Brains was going to need to buff out, and had swallowed his pride. There had been no jeering from his brother, instead just a nod. Under Gordon's clear guidance Scott had only given the submarine a minor scratch and he was starting to feel a little less stressed about how close the cavern walls were. Scott did as Gordon instructed, still going at a much slower pace than his brother would, and managed to clear the corner in a smooth motion with inches to spare. Scott was already scouting out the route ahead, eyes spending more time peering out the window than glued to the sonar, when John popped up in front of him.
"Sorry to interrupt your training trip, but we have a situation that requires Thunderbird Four."
Scott was up and out the chair in a flash. The pair swapped places as Gordon switched to the old map. Hands on the controls they started heading to a suitable turning point.
"Have Thunderbird Two ready outside for a pick up."
Scott grabbed the tablet from its holder. It lit up immediately as John sent the rescue details to the craft.
"Thunderbird Two is currently attached to a container ship in an attempt to stop its contents from spilling into the sea. Alan is in a submarine pod, but it just doesn't have enough power to keep the ship from sinking. It's only forty minutes from your current location. Thunderbird Two should just about be able to hold it until then."
"FAB, John."
Scott surveyed the map as Gordon weaved his way out the cave system with the same agility as yesterday, but with a little more haste. Once out, Scott flicked the route onto the aquanaut’s screen, who responded by hitting the throttle with enough force to push Scott back in his seat.
"I can make it in thirty five easily," Gordon gloated.
Scott nodded, eyes skimming over Thunderbird Two's statistics before opening up John's scans of the situation and the 'dash cam' of the green giant. The ship was tilted at an immense angle, but was currently stable, even as its cargo seemed on the verge of toppling. The cause for the problem wasn't obvious but that wasn't of concern right now. A small lifeboat was slowly leaving the vicinity of the vessel, which was a relief. With no life signs onboard they could resort to an abort if the risks were too high. They were primarily a rescue organisation, but in this case it would be detrimental to the environment if they let the cargo fall. If Thunderbird Four could stabilise it enough to allow Alan to get inflator bags attached then they could right it for long enough so the ship could get to the nearest port. The coastguard would sort that out with the help of the original crew.
Scott was relieved as they approached. Thunderbird Four was speedy for an underwater vessel, making the journey in thirty four minutes, but he was used to much, much faster speeds. Gordon slowed on the approach and headed immediately to the yellow blob that was the submarine pod. Alan gave a wave as he passed by. The craft's arms were extended and placed against the metal above the pod. The speed of the turbines increased slowly, and although there was very little improvement in the angle of the ship it meant the current angle could be maintained without Alan.
"You can let go now, Alan."
Scott got there before John, who was currently on the phone to the coast guard trying to ascertain how long it was going to take for them to reach the situation.
"Thanks Scott," Alan chimed cheerily
"Don't forget me! I'm the one doing the hard work."
"Sorry. Thank you Gordon."
"You're welcome."
Gordon grinned. Scott shook his head and let it go. The pair was either winding each other up or plotting something together. This was mild banter and he knew both his siblings were concentrating on their tasks. The smaller pod disappeared from beneath them. Scott tracked Alan's progress on the tablet, his little red dot heading back to the module and hopping across it to grab the large inflator bags from the back. They were going to need four according to John's calculations so he hoped Alan had the sense to drag them all out now so he didn't have to leave the pod again. The red icon eventually whizzed away from the module and towards the indicator on the stern end of the ship before heading straight back to grab the next bag. This one he attached to the bow end. When Alan was safely out the way, Scott selected the bags and activated them simultaneously. The added buoyancy lifted the ship higher in the water, taking Thunderbird Four with it. The video showed a vast improvement in the angle of the cargo and Thunderbird Two's engines were now able to pull the ship to its correct orientation with ease. Gordon released the ship with no adverse effects. He turned and sped towards the floating module. They burst above the surface with great theatre, spray sparkling like diamonds before returning to the sea. The arms that had previously braced against the ship grabbed the last inflator bag and pulled it into the water. They dived heading to the last placement indicator. Gordon waved as they passed Alan, who had been heading back for the last bag. After the bag was installed, Scott activated them and Virgil lowered Thunderbird Two putting slack in the lines. After a minute of stability, the lines were released and withdrawn. Gordon brought them back up to the surface, next to the submarine pod, before heading out the back. Gordon lept onto the module’s door to join a disgruntled looking Alan.
"You took my job!"
"You were taking too long."
"I so wasn't, and you know it."
Scott leapt across the water and joined them on the module's door. The sound of his siblings squabbling flowed over him. It happened frequently post rescue, particularly the less challenging ones where they sometimes stepped on each other's toes. Despite the noise, Scott was happy to see that the pair were in fact working together to get the pod out the water and into the module. Extending his arms above his head, he watched the pair while enjoying the feeling of stretching his legs. He hadn't been on land for four days and his body was itching for a run. The temptation to run circles around the module was sitting at the back of his mind, alongside all the teasing he'd get for doing so. When the pod was loaded the three of them congregated beside it. John had obviously been watching them as he immediately popped up on Scott's wrist and Virgil on Gordon's. Scott sidestepped so Alan could stand between Gordon and himself.
"The coastguard aren't coming, apparently they have something more urgent to deal with." Displeasure tainted the word urgent. "Virgil, the tanker should be able to keep afloat with the buoyancy aids attached, as long as they stick to 10 knots or less. The crew are making their way back to the ship and are aware of this. Considering the time it'll take for them to get to the nearest port it's not worth hanging around and the time saved would be negligible. It should be safe enough to head home and be on alert."
There were nods of agreement from everyone.
"Scott, if you're fed up with being confined with Gordon, I can give you a lift home."
"Hey!" Gordon exclaimed, "I'm not that bad."
"Has he been at the squirty cheese yet? That stuff smells so strong, and it's sticky."
The face Alan pulled was priceless.
"Thanks for the offer, Virgil, but I'm still in need of a little more practice."
"If you're sure, Scott."
"Let him go, Virgil. From the amount of scratches I saw on Thunderbird Four he needs it. He might even beat my record."
Laughter filled the air as every Tracy brother laughed. Scott ruffled Alan's hair as revenge, getting a glare from the teenager. With that he followed Gordon back to Thunderbird Four and jumped aboard. The airlock closed and they headed into the cockpit.
"Fancy getting us back?"
Scott threw his arm over his brother's shoulder and gave him a quick hug.
"How about you get us back while I make us some lunch? Anyway, I need to save myself for those tunnels. I can't embarrass International Rescue by scratching up our submarine on a rescue now, can I?"
Gordon laughed as they separated and slipped down into the driving seat. Scott resisted the urge to mess the man's hair up as he turned to leave. He could survive another four days in a submarine if it meant spending quality time with his brother.
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razorblade180 · 4 years ago
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Twin Snowflakes 22: Ground Zero
Part 21 -> here! <-
Bad luck has been a part of Qrow’s life for as long as he could remember. It manifested in a variety of ways but there was one in particular that was absolutely the worst, travel. Flat tire on a road trip, inconvenient. Plane delay, well that one was probably not his fault, but it felt like it! Certain cases like that were always a little iffy on if it was him or life. As the veteran huntsman stood on the deck of his son’s boat in the pouring rain with a Kraken raising from the depths, Qrow was sure of one thing. This one had to be his fault.
“I didn’t think grimm this big were still around. We’re in the middle of the ocean for crying out loud.” Qrow sighed, grabbing harbinger.” It’s cases like this he’d usually leave. Two big problems though. Problem number one, Sparrow was already firing cannons at it. Problem number two, it was waving Oscar around like a toy. He seemed okay though.
“CAN I HAVE SOME HELP HERE!?” He screamed, louder than the roaring winds and rough seas. “THIS GUY IS REALLY SLIMY!!”
“Slip out then!” Sparrow shouted in earnest. Oscar might’ve been far away but Sparrow could tell the man was not amused by that response. “What!? Do you want me to shoot that arm with you in it!? Penny will have a fit if I shot you!”
“PENNY WILL HAVE A FIT IF I'M EATEN!!!” Oscar wiggled and squirmed before finally managing to create an orb to push the tentacle off, then dispelling the orb to drop straight down. Cannon fire rained down on the center mass like grand finale fireworks, but only angered the beast. More tentacles cut through the air to reclaim its lost hostage.
“Give me a break.” The rain continued to pour down and sting against Oscar’s skin. He paid no mind to the whirlpools forming or the ship deck quickly approaching. Oscar simply closed his eyes. “Hey it’s been awhile. Mind lending a hand?” He called, subconsciously to his old friend.
“Hehe Oscar, do you even have to ask?”
Oscar smiled, opening his eyes and seeing Oz smile back through the reflection of the rain drops before seeing his own again, complete with white hair and golden eyes. “Let’s get to it shall we?”
xxxx
Nick remained quiet as Weiss drove back home from school. He was happy he made it back in time. A gigas dragging him away after his fight with Valerie would’ve made the entire incident worse. Though if he was being honest, fighting a gigas sounded cathartic in a way. He gently pulled up the window switch over and over, repeatedly.
Weiss took note of her son’s unusually sad demeanor. “Alright, wanna tell me what happened in there? You were full of energy before getting your work, and I doubt the workload has spooked you.”
“Nothing I’m not used to.”
“Ah, Valerie troubles.” Weiss glanced over and saw Nick glare at his own reflection. Looks like she was right on the money. “Take it from me, I’m sure whatever happened had more to do with her own personal feelings and not the feelings you have for her.”
“You say that with such confidence.”
“I was a teenage girl once too, you know? One with plenty of personal hurdles I tried to associate with other people instead of myself. It doesn’t ever really stop truthfully. You just get better at accepting the fact the problems fix itself when you decide to change how to respond to it.”
“Do you think I have a problem I should change? Loving a girl who pushes me away, it probably makes me look like a joke.” He tried rolling down the window again but found the switch had been locked. Yet another thing to make him sad.
“I think it’s not the wisest thing you’ve done, but it’s definitely the most normal teenage thing about you. Joke or not, feelings are feelings. They’ll work themselves out. Just don’t force anything and before you know it, you’ll see things a lot clearer.” Weiss reached over and ruffled his shaggy hair. “Who knows, maybe you’ll see this dew of yours needs to finally change.”
“As if!” Nick laughed, “I look too much like uncle if I cut it, and any longer makes me look like dad.”
“Not if you style it. Oh, or grow it out even longer. Like when you’re little! “Weiss cooed, “You and Summer were really hard to tell apart then.”
“Yeah, and people kept calling me ‘she’ and stuff. Nooooo thank you!” He folded his arms in protest.
“That won’t happen now that you got your father’s looks. You’ll just be a pretty boy. Then if you get facial hair!? Nick, let me make you gorgeous! I have Coco on speed dial!”
“This is why you had a boy and a girl, mom! So I can escape this torture.”
Weiss pouted, “Summer likes doing her own makeup and hair. I should be proud considering it’s my old look from waaaaay back, but I still wanna change things up. I’d give this entire family a makeover if you all weren’t so whiny about it.” Weiss looked in the mirror at neck length hair. She remembered how free she felt the first time she cut it. Having twins meant twice the hair pulling, three times if she counted the one person she wanted to pull her hair. Thinking back, there was a good chance it was one of times Jaune pulled it that gave way to the discussion of kids in the first place.
“Hmmm, maybe I should grow my hair out. I miss the old length sometimes.”
“Summer would be so upset.”
“Good, then she’ll change it. That’s one family member down.”
Nick playfully rolled his eyes. A makeover didn’t sound too annoying actually. Maybe after the tournament? He’d think about it. “Hey, mind if we train again today? I got a lot of pent up energy and new ideas.”
“I suppose. Someone has to make sure you don’t overdo it. Winter is coming over too, so it’s for the best I warm you up anyways. I’m positive after your recent school events that she has a few words for you.”
Nick gulped, knowing he was in for a workout. “Well now…guess I’m dying today.” He could already feel his muscles ache.
xxxx
Meanwhile in the woods, Summer and Veronica had crossed into unfamiliar territory, casual conversation. It wasn’t going well. They both agreed to chat but neither of them were actually talking! They were just walking with Veronica taking the lead, leaving Summer awkwardly following a few steps behind.
The girl had finally pulled herself together after her little episode. In truth, she was a little embarrassed to say anything after it. She hated looking weak, especially in front of Veronica, a girl who manages to look strong against even the harshest of critics and peers. It was quite envious, her attitude. Summer would give just about anything to have it. Summer looked down at her scroll for what must’ve been the tenth time. Still no missed messages.
“Expecting a call?” Veronica finally said, noticing the Schnee’s gaze consistently drifting. “Got a boyfriend or something I don’t know about?”
Summer felt like that might’ve been a jab but chose to ignore it. “Nick always calls me if Shiva gets out or nearly escapes. He’s always had a sixth sense for knowing her moves. It’s unlike him to not immediately call, even if he’s doing something urgent.” Summer put her scroll away. “Him not calling is odd.”
“Are you telling me she almost got out earlier? I didn’t really smell anything.” Veronica looked back to see the girl look at her confused. A fitting look honestly. “The one time Shiva was out and even when we argued yesterday, I smelled peppermint, a disgusting amount of it. The diamond dust smells the same.” Veronica pointed to her nose, “I didn’t smell that earlier.”
“Oh.” was all Summer could say. It should’ve been a relief, but it wasn’t. “Great, my panic attack was just unhinged. Even when she’s quiet, she’s ruining my day.”
“Are you saying Shiva tries escaping when you’re hysterical?”
“Apparently not, or at least not all the time? Agh, it’s impossible for me to tell.” Summer was even more perplexed than before. “Just when have I been talking to her? They’re not all fake, but...they’re not all real either? I can’t afford not knowing the” Her train of thought was broken when a snowball thrown by Veronica hit her coat. “Hey! Wh-”
Veronica quickly covered Summer’s mouth. “Shhh! Grimm.” She pointed several yards into the distance where two sabertooth grimm were roaming. “Alright, do your thing.”
Summer looked at the grimm, then back at Veronica, who gave a casual thumbs up. “Wait, you’re not helping?”
“Nope.”
“Whhhhyyyyyy exactly?” Summer questioned.
Veronica sighed, because one of the reasons I wanted to be out here is to better see you in action. Why else would I tell you to bring your blade?”
“You lead me here under the assumption of a fight…” Summer deadpanned, “Couldn’t you have looked up old videos of me? I didn’t see you drag Nick off to fight grimm so you can make his outfit.”
“Nick has double the videos of him fighting, as well as him figure skating. Also, I pay more attention to him than I do you.” It might’ve been rude, but it was the honest truth. Summer didn’t even seem surprised. She just looked at Veronica with judgment. “What?”
“Nothing, much.” Summer drew her blade and put a glyph at her feet. “Any requests for data purposes?” She could not believe this was happening.
“Just handle them how you would normally, oh huntress in training.” Veronica teased lightly.
Summer pointed her sword out with her right hand and her right foot forward, then took off. The distance between her and grimm was closed in a matter second. She leaped over one, slicing it’s head off through the back of its neck. Another glyph formed midair behind her. Summer used it to kick off right after the attack and thrust her blade through the second grimm’s eye socket. Not even a snarl was heard before it died instantly.
Summer looked back at Veronica. “Cake walk. You’d get more data out of a video than th-”
“BEHIND YOU!” Veronica shouted.
Summer looked over her shoulder to see a third one already pouncing. With a subtle breath, Summer slowed its approach and then back stepped to safety. One more glyph was put under the paws of the beast and pulled out like a rug to trip it. Summer spun the chamber of her Myrtenaster and threw into its ribs like a javelin. The chamber landed on flame dust, setting it ablaze.
“Phew! That was...unexpected.” Summer said, coming down from a surge of adrenaline.
Veronica ran over to Summer, surprised. “How did you do that, the breath thing?” Veronica asked, “That’s a trick I’ve never seen.”
“ Oh that? Well…” Summer took her left glove off and focused. Little snowflakes started floating upward from it in place like a snow globe. “I’m not too good at it, but I can control a bit of Shiva’s powers. Only when I’m cold though, or freaked out, but that second one is more involuntary.” Summer put back on her glove, “considering the potential risks and conditions, I don’t use it in fights. Explaining it to officials would be a pain anyways.”
That made sense. Veronica could smell a hint of peppermint coming off Summer. That was Shiva’s power alright. This also explained the mass amount of ice she saw Summer create in her video fighting the Paladin. “Permission to touch you?” Veronica asked, like she always did. Summer nodded. Veronica reaches out and places two fingers against the pulse in Summer’s neck. “Any other Shiva related tidbits to share?”
“Ummm, we share a subconscious, sort of? More like a neutral ground.”
Veronica paused momentarily, “what?” She said, annoyed by all this cookie cutter information. “Gonna need more tidbits?”
“It’s hard to explain. I don’t understand it either.” Veronica looked at Summer, unblinking. Apparently that wasn’t a good enough answer. “Look, imagine something like...an ocean, just water and the sky above. Now flip it upside and make that ocean completely frozen. That’s more or less what the subconscious looks like. There’s ground to stand on, but I can’t really see. Depending if I’m actually dreaming or in a certain place, then that’s what the subconscious can look like. The only constant is that ice ceiling.”
Every sentence from this girl felt like a fever dream to Veronica. “Summer, I doubt you're lying to me, but do you by any chance also do drugs? You know, the hard kind.”
“As if!” Summer swatted Veronica’s hand off her neck. “First of all, drugs and I don’t mix. Second, be serious!”
“It was a valid question. Rich kids do a lot of things. If Nick told me he tried it before I wouldn’t be surprised. Saddened, but not surprised.”
“While I would be hounded by you no doubt?”
Veronica crossed her arms, “I’d berate anyone who would do drugs.” Her tone was stern and cutthroat, “It’s an ugly slope that goes down fast.”
The way she spoke about it was rather serious compared to what Summer was used to. “Have...you done drugs?” Summer asked cautiously.
Veronica thought about her answer carefully for a moment. “For a brief time, yes. I’m past it however, totally clean. I thought it might help control my instincts.” Veronica slouched over with a sigh, “Unfortunately, noooo dice. Come on. Let’s keep moving.” Veronica continued to walk.
Summer stood quietly for a moment, then followed as well. She wasn’t expecting to get to the topic of Veronica’s genetics in such a personal way. Then again, someone’s very birth is nothing but personal. Curiosity began to get the better of her. They did make a deal after all.
“V-Veronica…?” Summer stuttered, “I held up my end of the bargain. The only other thing that may be worth mentioning is Shiva only knows what I know when she tries escaping, and I only know what she does if I’m conscious. Other than that I think all the dribble about the state of mind would make you snore. So…..”
Veronica could tell where this was going. “Relax, I’m not about to break a deal that I proposed in the first place.”
She reached for a nearby branch and plucked a silver flower off of it. It’s five petals were spread wide Veronica placed it in her own hair. “I take it that even your school isn’t bold enough to ignore basic faunus knowledge and history, despite their…questionable place in said history?”
Summer nodded, “Hey, Atlas isn’t the kind of place to bury the leads. Older society and its people simply do what they want, how they want.” Summer cringed, “Not that doing so is exactly better in the long run. Besides, you think rich tycoons wouldn’t tell their heirs and shady dealers how they amassed their fortune? Atlas’s people might know too well the benefits and contributions the faunus play in our history and in a work capacity.” Summer felt sick saying that. “It’s disgusting really.”
“Couldn’t agree more. With all that said, how much do you wanna bet there’s aspects glossed over?” Veronica wagered.
“I could’ve sworn you made it clear that you have no interest in money?” Summer quipped.
Veronica let out a humorous breath, “Tah, a girl can change her mind can’t she?” Veronica watched Summer reach in her pocket and pull out a hundred lien casually, giving it up. Veronica was surprised. “We didn’t even make the bet yet.”
“If I knew everything, then I wouldn’t be curious about this in the first place. Odds of you teaching me something new about your people is a given.”
Maybe it was the fact that Summer was made of money, or had good intentions for learning more, but Veronica couldn’t take the money. She could only waved it away. “Geez it was a joke. Making you pay would look bad.” She said, in a forest with nobody but themselves around. “Qualities Like night vision and other adaptations aren’t the only animals traits given. It’s fundamentally built into everything about us. Disposition, personality traits, social skills, everything; the animal you are influences all of these in a variety of ways in varying amounts.”
“Like how faunus with nocturnal animal traits tend to take night jobs?”
“Veronica nodded, “Yes. A bird faunus might choose a home at high elevations, even if they don’t have wings. A deer or rabbit faunus may have to work harder at public speaking than let’s say a wolf faunus. The subtles can get even tinier; or as obvious as a feline faunus loving fish.”
Summer never really thought about it, but that made sense.“What you’re basically telling me is for a faunus, nature vs nurture takes on an entirely different level of complexity? Nothing stops a rabbit faunus from being a motivational speaker, but it would be more work, unless their parents or even their environment had predisposed them to be apart of a more vocal and outgoing lifestyle?” Summer’s eyes lit up. “That’s actually really fascinating, sowhere do you fit in with all of this?” She asked, wanting to learn more.
Veronica was taken off gaurd by how interested Summer was. “For a person who apparently hates school as much as I do, you look eager to learn.”
“School sucks because of social pressure and redundant information.” Summer deadpanned, “Anyone would get bored of learning material that is forced upon them and is as quickly discarded.”
“Well, I guess that’s true. I wouldn’t say I’m in love with any aspect of school, but learning is the least problematic part of what I had to think about it. Anyways, what I’ve told you so far applies to all faunus. With the way the world is and all the kinds of possible traits, finding a place to fit in isn’t difficult. Those animal instincts are very much submissive compared and don’t hinder our ability. Like you said, a rabbit faunus can do public speaking. A bat faunus can absolutely walk around in broad daylight. However, there’s a minority among faunus that have their animal gene act way more dominant than the majority. Roughly 13 to around 18 percent of the faunus population, if I remember correctly. This group, my group, are easily recognized by having exaggerated or extra features. Extra large wings, skin more animal than human, cold blood-”
“Ears and a tail?” Summer interjected, “appearance wise, you seem to have gotten off easy. You covered in fur or having whiskers would be a little distracting. Not gonna lie.”
“Externally, I’m just a tick higher on date lists for everyone with disturbing cat girl fantasies. Make no mistake though, I’m not the average faunus. Super faunus, the minority, have their animal qualities cranked up and deformed. I can’t see in the dark, but my nose is keener than any dog I’ve encountered. All those little traits I mentioned before? They tend to manifest in my people aggressively and often. To put into perspective, I have more in common with my grandpa than I do my mom, on an animal level.”
“Wow, that’s…intense. Your grandpa roars and gets all apex predator on people when he’s pissed- oh! Wait, your temper is shit because of your genes!?”
Veronica inhaled, ignoring the insult for the sake of conversation. “To a degree, yes. I cannot pin the blame entirely on my DNA, unfortunately…” she added that last bit quietly. “Despite what people write online about my family, we aren’t just cats. We are big cats. I’m a panther for crying out loud.”
Summer squinted, “Well, seeing how you’re mostly blonde, aren’t you technically more of a jaguar or a leopar-”
“Panther.” Veronica said, this time with feeling. “I could dye my hair red and that doesn’t change my DNA, Summer.”
For her own safety, Summer wisely chose not to make a very easy pink panther joke. She thought about it, but this conversation didn’t need to fall apart for the sake of Summer wanting to be a smartass to Veronica for once. “Fair enough, continue.” She said, still thinking about the joke.
“My athletic ability is exceptional, hearing too. My tail gives me balance more than other faunus. Despite the term super, anyone with the mutation would tell you how daunting it is. The type of animal, like everything else, determines what the faunus might deal with. For me it boils down two major things that contradict each other. Problem number one, not eating enough meat.”
“What happens?”
“Same thing that happens to any starved predator. I become impulsive, irritated easily, confrontational, my senses get...sensitive, adrenaline makes me dizzy-”
“So you’re super hangry?” Summer said without thinking. She immediately tucked her lips in and accepted the “you are an idiot” look that Veronica gave her without mercy. “Why the hell did I say that?”
Veronica groaned, “Minutes ago I heard you bring up nature vs nurture for comparing and explaining what I’ve said. Now you compare things to being hangry? It’s not even about how full I am, it’s the nutritional and instinctual part of devouring meat that my brain wants. It’s no different than your body craving milk for calcium. If I’m not careful and reach my limit, I tend to lose sense of reason and even blackout into a haze of instinct. Essentially, I go feral. Your brother can tell you that it’s not a pretty thing.” Veronica frowned.
The bruises on his face that day after school started to make a little more sense. No way he’d just let Max and Darren get clean hits in! He was dealing with an enraged Veronica. It actually put a lot of things in perspective. Summer couldn’t count how many times Veronica looked like she wanted to actually claw a person’s eyes out. She might’ve actually been thinking it over! That...was a scary thought. “What’s problem number two?” There was no way it could be just as bad.
“Eating too much meat. That’s when I’m an apex.” Veronica said, giving a thousand yard stare. Summer immediately took her statement back. That sounded way more problematic. “My attitude shifts. My fuse isn’t as short as when I’m starved but let’s say I can be very...demanding. Yeah, let’s go with that.”
Summer raised a brow, skeptical of that statement. “Are you saying-”
“Better think twice before saying I’m already demanding. Neither you or Nick has seen me when I’m caught up in the euphoria of being what I am. I’d put that girl Amber to shame, and my physical prowess are even better. I’m wild in a completely different way. Filter, broken. Can’t even put that state into words. So yeah, that’s my genetic mishap in a nutshell.”
“You being a food snob and all of your diets make a lot more sense now. Why keep this to yourself for so long.”
“Simple, it’s not anybody’s business what I’m dealing with. It’s handled, and doesn’t need to be explained among faunus. Living normally isn’t hard when you know what you’re dealing with, which is why I’m shocked every resource hasn’t been poured into figuring out your problem.”
That stung a bit. “Oscar is currently crossing the sea to potentially find answers, I have you know.” Summer said defensively.
A scoff came from Veronica. “No offense, but that sounds like a waste of energy.”
“Saying no offense doesn’t make me feel less hurt.” Summer folded her arms. “How would you know? Unlike you, my affliction has no prior information to go off of, and isn’t a genetic thing at birth. Any move could be closer to the truth, or a shot in the dark. For all intended purposes, you were born and live normally like anyone else.”
“Hate to make you sound stupid, but a test tube baby isn’t normal in most circles. Two moms, remember?” Veronica said, coldly.
Summer stopped walking. For some reason, that didn’t sit right with her. “Isn’t that name...an insult?”
“Yep.” Veronica kept walking, “Keep up. I’ll leave you out here.”
Summer listened. Maybe it was her imagination, but that atmosphere between them felt like it changed again. They had both held up their end of the bargain. Now things felt cold between them like before. Summer wasn’t expecting to learn as much as she did. Many things were answered today, so why did it feel like she knew less about Veronica. Blanks were filled into a picture she never knew the true size of, and still didn’t. One of those pieces felt out of place. The piece that helped put build up to this situation in the first place.
“Veronica…?” Summer uttered, “By any chance, does any of what you told me having anything to do with the torn pages in your-” suddenly, Summer’s words were stuck in her throat. Veronica had turned around to look her dead in the eyes, coldly and without care. Summer felt herself become small and beneath Veronica yet again, inferior.
“Never bring this topic up again, got it?” Veronica had to stop herself from balling up her hands, or she’d cut them with her nail. “Got it?” She said again, doing her best not to blow a fuse.
“S..sorry. I just...thought-”
“You thought wrong.” Veronica said. She turned around and kept walking. “We’re not friends.”
Heat rose to Summer’s face. It was impossible to know if she was feeling embarrassed, upset, or anything. All she knew was for a moment, she felt tears well up before vanishing. She breathed through her nose and bit back. “Yeah, I’m well aware.”
xxxx
“Sloppy!!!” The commanding voice of Weiss’s sister cried, knocking her nephew into a bush for the tenth time today. “You’re unfocused! Surely you can do better?”
Weiss witnessed her child stumble back to his feet, hair messed up and panting. He stabbed his sword into the ground to brace himself momentarily. His aura was still high, and yet… “Winter, he��s still under the weather. Ease up.”
“This is me easing up. You simply coddle him too much. Nick is more than capable of continuing. I don’t remember going as easy on you when you asked for training all those years ago. You turned out fine.”
“I wouldn’t exactly use our relationship as a standard.” Weiss mumbled.”
Nick raised his sword quickly. He channeled a fire ball to the tip of his blade as fast as he could, but was still too slow. Winter had already rushed towards his left. He had no choice but to abandon the fire attack for a block that barely withstood his Aunt’s blade. Nick slid backwards on the stone ground.
Winter shook her head. “Once again, you waste aura and energy not because the attack was a bad choice, but because you simply cannot use your semblance fast enough.”
Winter shot off a fire ball not even a second later. She waited closely for Nick to raise his block, then used a standard glyph to propel herself forward. Her speed surpassed the fireball, and Winter was able to position her blade behind him as the flame made contact with his.
Nick looked over his shoulder at her, frustrated, but not willing to yield. He pivoted around with his blade held out to direct hers away, then put a glyph between them. By the time he did so, Nick already knew she was on the move again. “Don’t count me out!” His left hand pulled a summoned sword from the glyph. Nick swung it out to the left and around to his back while his actual blade was swung right. The weight to Winter’s attack came from back and was blocked, perfect. He leaned his body left with his blade as he felt Winter shift that direction to his opened side.
Winter could only smile as she went in to strike. Nick just played her and she knew it. Her blade still clashed with the summon weapon, leaving his right blade free to use the momentum from the lean and make a clean stab with no chance for her to block. Winter did the wise thing and jumped back, abandoning her assault. His left side was never really opened. It was bait. Both swords were used to block wherever she came from. The right one only stopped short because the left one did the job of making sure she aimed for his back by swinging outward. Winter would have either been hit or blocked if she immediately attacked left or right, and the glyph protected the front. By making her attack his back, he all but ensured she would aim left next because it was the only unguarded spot, a spot he was ready to defend and attack from simultaneously. It was this kind of quick thinking and reckless style that separated Nicholas from anyone else. Even his sister. Especially his sister. Winter loved Summer to death, but the girl was quick to panic if plans fell apart.
Normally Winter would hear him say something self-indulgent. Nope. Just a quiet stare and a fireball he had to fire off thanks to the distance between them. Still…
“Nice effort.” Winter said, knocking it away with ease. “But no. The simple fact you can summon the sword of an Arma Gigas so easily yet remain sluggish with more basic functions of your semblance is a baffling talent. If it wasn’t for your unconventional swordplay that you somehow make work, I’d say getting a gold medal would be impossible. Still might be. It only does so much.”
“Well it’s a little late to change my style now. This is what I know best.” He dropped his sword and slowly let out a breath, filled with irritation. “I know I’m lacking.”
Winter raised a brow. She looked at Weiss confused, “What’s wrong with him? The usual?”
“No. Well, yeah, but he’s been stretched thin in general recently.”
“I’m not stretched thin. I just...nothing feels like it’s enough. Training in particular. Like you said, I can make swords in my sleep. All the other things our family is supposed to be good at, I’m average!”
Winter turned off mentor mode for a moment. Clearly this is more than about training, but she’ll play along. It was time to be an aunt. “Nick, you are in a class of your own. Sixteen and this skilled by no means is average. In regards to us, your family, no one here was perfect. Nobody here is perfect. Your mother still over extends her strikes from time to time and your father definitely wasn’t a genius by any means.”
Weiss narrowed her eyes, “Hey, I’m free game but be nice to my husband. You’re right, but be nice.”
“Like me, you choose to wield two blades. Unlike me, it’s your go to stance.” Winter informed, “Our semblance works best when we have a free hand. That’s why shields aren’t a good option for us. The choice to use two blades isn't bad by normal standards. I’ve faced many foes that pressured me with similar tactics, even beat me. Though only one is real, another sword has made it harder for you to use glyphs. At least it should be, but summoning and a video of your exam says otherwise.”
Nick looked at his summoned blade in frustration. “I still don’t know what I did differently that day. I was faster and more in control than I have ever been. Not only did I actually make a gigas, but even all my other glyphs felt on par with Summer’s.”
“Remember Nick, You and Summer excel at different things.” Weiss reminded him. “Yes, her fundamentals and use of dust are better, but she has a knack for it. That’s her edge. In a fight, Summer’s wide range of dust and glyph combinations always means she’s never out of range to attack or control a fighting space. You may not have that but your speed, stamina, and reflexes make up for it. In close quarters, no one your age matches you in Atlas.”
“That merit just so happens to have made you neglect the need to sharpen your other talents. Do you know how dangerous you could be with-”
“Time dilation? Yeah, mom told me.” He interjected, “something about those other things simply don’t click in my head. Can’t even get a fireball right.”
He sat down on the ground and took another breath. “The way I fight, it isn’t like I built it to be the most versatile. My offense is my defense. The use of momentum to add power behind my strikes helps keep in moving. It’s why my stamina and speed is good, to push my body for relentless attacks.”
He didn’t say it out right, but he didn’t have to. Nick made a style that didn’t make him good against a variety of people in mind. No, Nick thought of style against Shiva. In the end, that’s the only fight that matters. Beating others with it was a way to refine it for the moment it mattered. Abandoning it was not an option. Only improving.
Winter could only look upon the boy's face and see someone who only ever has the best intentions for others slowly begin to waver. Her teenage years were long gone, but no one ever truly forgets the confusion they went through during that time. Winter walked over to her young nephew and sat in front of him, legs crossed. “Why is it always the most caring of people who can never give themselves the break they give others? Nicholas Schnee, you are a kind, hardworking young man that never doubts himself often. Much like your mother, you take hold of what you want and clench it tight.”
“Lately holding on seems to hurt more than letting go. Nothing...feels right. Not just in training either. I feel like a gap between me and everyone else has been growing, like I’m out of a very important loop. Val, Vee, even Summer.”
“This time of year gets people stressed. It’s possible every one just needs a breath. I can speak much on a gap, but I’m positive time will mend it. Despite my feelings towards the young Belladonna, it is pretty clear the two of you get along. Confide in her.”
Weiss and Nick went bugged for a moment. They both looked at each other and then back at Winter.
“Wow.” Weiss spoke, “That’s pretty big, coming from you. Anytime you see that girl, you have nothing but disappointing looks.”
“Yeah Auntie, I’m shocked.”
Winter turned a little red, “I don’t see why. I may find her a bad influence on you and your sister, but my opinion is one of many. With you, Veronica is a welcome distraction to break up your daily routine. I’ll give her that much.”
“How generous,” Nick said sarcastically. Veronica was starting to sound more like a battle tactic than a person. Though she probably wouldn’t mind if it meant spending time with him. Regardless, “I appreciate the suggestions, but my time is better spent training at the moment. If I can be half as capable as I was during my exam, then I chalk that up as good progress.”
Winter hit his head. “Fool, you’re not getting it!”
“Ow! What!? All I said was- Ow!” Weiss also hit his head, much lighter though. “Stop hitting me! I thought this was a pep talk!?”
“It is.” Winter stated, “It’s also a lesson. The way you are now, you can’t progress much further. I urge you to really think about what made that day different from now; what made your last attack against me different even. That is all the hints I will provide to him. I do hope your mother keeps quiet as well.”
“Hey! I get I’m a little...lenient with him, but I would never skip an opportunity to watch him grow. Besides, telling him wouldn’t mean he could do it any faster anyways.” Weiss teased. She could hear Nick’s ears practically buzzing.
“If that’s the case then say it!” He asked eagerly. He was given no answer. Winter and Weiss walked away from him like they didn’t peak his curiosity. He assumed training was about to resume like normal. However, it didn’t. A look of shock came to him when both of his elders faced him, blades drawn.
“What, both of you at once.” He said nervously, grabbing his sword and rising quickly to his feet. “What happened to me being under the weather, mom!?”
Weiss smiled, “Hey, you wanted fast results. Until you find the answer to your glyph problem, we’ll double down or swordsmanship. Brace yourself. I’ll hold back.”
“I will not!” Winter smiled.
Nick didn’t even get a chance to blink before the two of them came after him. He gulped, “Should’ve stayed in bed.” Nick prepared himself when suddenly, a cold chill went down his spine. Weiss and Winter immediately recognized the look of fear on his face and stopped their approach while he pulled out his scroll to call his sister. “Pick up. Come on Summer, pick up!” He muttered.
xxxx
Summer felt like an idiot. Of course nothing has changed. Why would it? A talk didn’She walked faster, out pacing Veronica.
“Hey, slow down. I haven’t told you where we’re going.” Veronica said, but Summer didn’t listen. “Hey!”
“Leave me alone! I may not come here often but I live here. I’ll find my way without you.” Summer said, grunting as she forced her way through dense branches and bushes.
“Can you not act like a child for once!?” Veronica yelled, running after her. “And stop ignoring me!” Veronica was near her wits end.
“.........”
And then she reached it. Veronica’s tail and tensed up. “Summer!” Veronica yelled again, going through the bushes. “I said stop ignoring-” the potent odor of peppermint invaded her senses out of nowhere. Veronica looked around the area, seeing nothing. Nothing, but a frozen lake, shimmering with diamond dust below the surface; and Summer standing in place, shivering.
“Summer…?” She said, concerned this time. Her words didn’t reach, not immediately. The scent wasn’t only coming from the lake. Veronica didn’t dare to move as she watched a finger point across the water. Her eyes looked in that direction to see nothing but scared trees and large rocks that had been chipped rather deep.
“A fight?” Veronica thought. She looked closer. All the markings looked to be going outward and from one spot. A spot several feet off the lake. Even with all the dust, it was clear that spot smelled the most foul. “No, an explosion.” Her attention went back to Summer. “A dust explosion.” Veronica yelled again. “Hey! Summer! Answer me, please!?” She could no longer be calm. Veronica ran to the girl screaming her name.
Summer might as well have been deaf to Veronica’s voice. All she heard was laughter. Her laughter, coming from Shiva skating on the ice.
“Hahahahaha! Oh wow! We haven’t been here in ages Summer!!!” Grinning and filled with joy, Shiva extended her hand, “Summer, come join me!” The glow of her eyes grew more dazzling, as well as her smile. “Just like before….”
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Three things to do right when investing in B2B Event businesses
Recently, several analysts acting on behalf of Private Equity firms looking to invest in B2B Event businesses have reached out to me. Now, that's not my primary area of ​​expertise, but even I would say something is up. Whether it's "troubled assets" or a "recovery scenario", one thing we can be sure of is that more PE money is circulating in our industry than ever before; As far as I remember. Depending on the size of these PE homes, they may be chasing after some of the biggest names in the public space, considering lending more money to existing PE-owned organizers, or working with established industry executives to go on a shopping spree to build new buildings. businesses from scratch.
 As part of these exchanges, some thought-provoking questions (as anyone interested in investors will understand) and incredibly stupid questions (just like that) were asked. Leaving the obvious financial, business, and legal ones aside, here are my three favorite answers to the main question I was asked:
 If you were currently investing in an events business, what would you look for?
1- Data Due Diligence
 No surprises here. I remember a SPA we signed (as a vendor in 2011) there was a clause that said data and databases that allowed trading would be delivered after a CD, and that was pretty much the only reference. Maybe that was enough for this deal 10 years ago, but now those days should be a thing of the past and we should remove the "We can't ask them for their data" stamp. I bet we can. This is the basis of the business we buy. If I were on the buy side today, I would get a third party to ask the target the following questions:
 How many people have you lost access to due to the pandemic job loss, and what have you done to restore access to accounts where you only have one? I know this is a bit verbose and boring, but one question can tell you a lot about the team you're investing in.
While you're at it, here's a non-exhaustive list of data metrics I'd love to use as part of my bargaining strategy:
 What is the contact-to-account ratio for participants? (in plain English, how many people do they know about their clients and prospects?)
Are your customers' products/services adequately tagged in your CRM? So what is the average product per customer? (simply, do they know what their customers are actually doing?)
Do you have a data quality metric? What does it consist of? Innovation? completeness? Another? (read: do you really care about any of these things?)
A short personal advice, get short answers just for these. Forget long-winded explanations.
 2- Digital Talent, do they have it?
 Now that we have a rough idea of ​​where they stand in the face of data capabilities, I think it's time we insisted on a minimum level of digital literacy in key Leadership positions, starting at the top. The FD -> CFO -> CEO route that prevails in our industry has proven incredibly successful for times when organic growth is just over GDP in single digits and actual job growth is sustained inorganically.
 But times are changing now and we need the best managers to search in areas that may be a little beyond their current skills. The hottest topics in our industry: Digital revenues, data management and virtual/hybrid require digital expertise to both define and execute the strategy. I'm investing my money in more Digital Talent to get into boardrooms fast.
 On this topic, as part of my humble contribution to Denzil and Marco's book Re-inventing Live, I proposed a checklist for digital preparation. You can find the full list in the book, but here's what I would insist executive leadership (at least) take care of:
 Is there someone in charge of digital who isn't your Head of IT and doesn't report to the IT function? Do they have a team? To whom do they report?
How often do you meet with your marketing chief? Is he sitting at the marketing board desk? Who does marketing report to? And most importantly, is marketing a cost center for you?
Are you on your marketing seed list? (meaning: do you get all your outgoing email marketing?)
Adnan Rana
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dawning-star · 5 years ago
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LFRP - Rinalys Dawnstar {Updated}
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Basics –––– ✢
▌NICKNAMES: Rin
▌AGE: 28 or so
▌RACE: Au Ra - Xaela
▌GENDER: Female
▌SEXUALITY: Heterosexual
▌MARITAL STATUS: Single. 
▌SERVER: Balmung - Crystal Data Center
Physical Appearance –––– ♤
▌HAIR: Rose colored pink, reaching down to around her chest. Usually worn up these days
▌EYES: Lilac, with violet limbal rings
▌HEIGHT: 4 fulm, 10 ilms
▌BUILD: Lean. Toned enough to maintain her dexterity.
▌DISTINGUISHING MARKS: Rinalys has a number of scars along her back in particular, remnants of her time in servitude. As of late, she has become less hesitant to show them, but will not quickly answer questions about them unless she trusts a person. The palm of her left hand is also heavily scarred, branded and cut. Each wound on her has a story, and many of them are, in fact, linked ot her past.
▌COMMON ACCESSORIES: Her left hand will always be gloved.
Personal –––– ♢
▌PROFESSION: Member of the Midnight Pearl, Part-time Associate of Priarch Enterprises. Formerly a mercenary
▌HOBBIES: Gardening. People watching. Information seeking. Social drinking.  
▌LANGUAGES: Eorzea Common, Xaelan
▌RESIDENCE:  Sealight Estate, though she also has a small home of her own in the Mist.
▌BIRTHPLACE: The Azim Steppe
▌RELIGION: She has a very basic belief in Azim and Nhaama. Mostly learned through childhood stories. However she’s lived in Eorzea longer than the steppe so that’s minimal at best.
▌FEARS: Being Abandoned. Feeling helpless. Death (at least a little). The past catching up with her. Abnormally large insects that should be set on fire ASAP.
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Relationships –––– ♡
▌SPOUSE: None.
▌CHILDREN: None.
▌PARENTS: They exist, technically. She hasn’t been with them for most of her life, however. Their whereabouts are currently unknown, but presumed to still be the Steppe.
▌SIBLINGS: None that she’s aware of
▌OTHER RELATIVES: None.
Traits –––– ♧
extroverted / introverted / in between
disorganized / organized / in between
close minded / open-minded / in between
calm / anxious / in between
disagreeable / agreeable / in between
cautious / reckless / in between
patient / impatient / in between
outspoken / reserved / in between
leader / follower / in between
empathetic / unemphatic / in between
optimistic / pessimistic / in between
traditional / modern / in between
hard-working / lazy / in between
cultured / un-cultured / in between
loyal / disloyal / in between
faithful / unfaithful / in between
Vices / Flaws –––– ♠
▌SMOKING: never / sometimes (very rare) / frequently / to excess.
▌DRUGS: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.
▌ALCOHOL: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess
▌OTHER FLAWS: Stubborn to a fault. Can be hotheaded under the right circumstances. Frequently short on gil for basic necessities. Illiterate. Is also a little bit of a troublemaker when the mood arises.
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Possible Hooks –––– ♦
The Midnight Pearl - Saviors from hard times of her own, she once sought sanctuary within their walls. In time and in getting to know the others she would join their ranks herself, seeking to grow and become something more. As such she can often be seen in events that they may hold, or other business they conduct.
Priarch Enterprises - At best she’s employed in Edarien’s care part time, coming and going as her whims see fit. Anyone in contact with the company has likely heard mention of Rin in passing. Maybe a story or two about her temper and something she might have beheaded.
Taverns - She’s a bit notorious for being at the bar a little frequently. Rinalys has her fair share of tabs racked up, but finds it a good place to gather information. Of course the fun that comes from mingling there is important too.
The Wandering Kind - Despite a home of her own these days, this girl is one who can’t seem to stay in one locale for too long, which means that she might just end up in your neighborhood. How long she stays is another matter.
What I’m looking for –––– ♥
Mostly, to expand the number of contacts that I have and open up doors for possible interactions outside of my current ones. I tend to keep to myself and am hoping to change that even a little. IC or OOC alike.
New friends, possibly ships, I’m pretty open to stuff admittedly. Anything deep requires familiarity and communication before I’m likely to go with it. I’ve been burned at least a couple times. 
I’m all for pre-established relationships as well or establishing a job network for her. In the past she’s been a mercenary as well as a member of the Rogue’s guild, beyond being a former slave. There’s a large amount of wiggle room in it too given her tendency to not stick to one place. 
Out of Character –––– ♣
I get anxious. This can ease up once I’ve gotten to know a person. Groups/Events can take a lot of working up to go to, however. I’ve been better about it recently. Usually.
I also am very prone to getting distracted by things and can easily throw myself into something that wasn’t what I intended to do for hours on end.
My work schedule might make it a bit difficult for consistent RP. I tend to be scheduled where I’m on for 7 days, and then off the next 7 for ten hour shifts at a go. So patience is a must if you do want to make plans.
Most RP will generally be in game or on Discord, if it happens.
Contact Information –––– ✰
Tumblr - I’m always free to field asks or messages here. Headcanons, asks, starters are all things I adore as well if wanting to keep it casual.
Discord - On request
In game - Rinalys Dawnstar. 99% of the time on Balmung, usually in Ul’dah if I’m bored.
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olliya · 5 years ago
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Readers‘ engagement on AO3
This time it will be less scientific, and more like me writing down my stream of consciousness. But the methodology was really straight-forward, so I think I can spare us the details, and I wanted to show you a detour I made trying to untangle the reasons behind certain fandom reactions. Join me for a trip?
AO3 is rather infamous for its lack of readers engagement (see all the initiatives supporting the commenting: @ao3commentoftheday​, @longlivefeedback​), at least among the fics and writers I am in contact with (and I do pay attention to the stats, you can believe me 😉 ). Nevertheless, some people feel very comfortable on this platform and for quite some time already I wondered what leads to such diametrically different writers’ experiences.
I started with analyzing Comments for Sakura’s ships. Since I did the same analysis for four Sakura’s ships: SasuSaku, NaruSaku, KakaSaku and MadaSaku on ff.net, we can have a direct comparison, especially as the time scope of existence Pairing Option and AO3 as a platform are very similar, and fic numbers are also comparable.
Very briefly: I sorted the fics into the following bins: >500 Comments, 201-500 Comments, 101-200 Comments, 51-100 Comments, 21-50 Comments, 11-20 Comments, 6-10 Comments, 2-5 Comments, 1 Comment, 0 Comments. All data are presented in percentage to allow for comparisons between the ships.
So let’s dive in:
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On the first glance the graphs look peculiar: there is always sort of a double maximum for “0 Comments” and “2-5 Comments” divided by a minimum for “1 Comment”. But once we remember that the Comments on AO3 include also author’s responses the situation becomes clear: the majority of fics have 2 comments: namely 1 real Comment from a reader and one answer from the author.
To put this hypothesis into a test I checked how many fics have 2 Comments, and it is 316 out of 839 of SasuSaku fics in “2-5 Comments” bin, 84 out of 204 fics for NaruSaku and 104 out of 315 fic for KakaSaku – which gives always ca. one third of comments in the “2-5 Comments” bin.
At that point I deliberated for a while whether I should modify my bins to include “2 Comments” as a separate category, but I opted out of it for the sake of (future) comparisons with ff.net (and because I think by bins are very good, thank you).
As a side note: on the first 4 graphs we can also see that MadaSaku has a different distribution than all the other ships, but it is worth mentioning that it was also an outlier on ff.net. We will come to this later.
Peculiarity of distribution aside – the feedback on 3 main Sakura’s ships is consistently miserable. But, I reasoned, AO3 is famously M/M oriented so maybe the F/M audience is simply not there. Therefore, I set off to check all the Naruto ships in the order of their popularity, which btw is the following:
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So, working down the list we get this:
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And, WTF Naruto fandom? Most of the fics for hugely popular, established ships have no comments??!! Or one comment and an answer from the writer??!!
That was a really disappointing exercise…
Until I found that:
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MadaTobi was the first ship that displayed a different pattern of readers interactions! It has a maximum in “21-50 Comments” per fic which is perfectly decent and corresponds well with the values for the ships I examined before on ff.net.
Encouraged by this discovery I dug further: (And tbh for a moment I thought I have here a “Madara-effect”, since both MadaTobi and MadaSaku displayed encouraging results 😉 )
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But Madara-effect was not the case (HashiMada displays the same distribution as all the other ships) and further data were even more disappointing. (Let me repeat myself: WTF, Naruto fandom?!)
Until I found another instance of good readers’ participation:
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KakaGai! So, at that point we had three ships that were behaving differently than the norm: MadaTobi, KakaGai and MadaSaku.
I looked further to see if I can find more examples of fandom positivity, but, spoiler alert – No. For the sake of appearances lets look at the data though. GaaLee is sort of a borderline case, so let’s flag it as “tentative” for now.
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So, what could be the reason for such a drastically different behavior of distinctive pockets of the fandom? Over the course of last year, I was observing how MadaTobi was rapidly gaining popularity, so that hinted me to follow this line of reasoning.
For each ship, I broke down the fics numbers into years when they were published. I ignored all the fics published in 2020 (because the year has only started and including those data would skew the image). To be able to compare the ships (which vary widely in term of fic numbers) I calculated the percentages of fics published in each year. I.e if a ship had 100 fics published until December 2019 and 30 of them were published in 2019, then 2019 had 30% of all published fics. It was at that point irrelevant how many fics were published in 2020, they weren’t counted either the way. I included only data from 2011 on, because earlier ones are very fuzzy due to back-dating customs that were in fashion at that time (for explanations see here).
Let’s look at the data. Tadaaa!!!
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Isn’t it absolutely beautiful?! (yes, I know!) Does it look like a tangle of knitting yarn? (yes, I know that as well!)
So, let me break it down for you:
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See that, that general trend? This is the growth curve that most of the ships follow – pretty linear, with maybe a bit of acceleration in 2019.
Now let’s focus on outliers: (3 most popular ships: SasuNaru, KakaIru and SasuSaku are included for reference – they illustrate the general trend pretty well).
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The ships that grew more than 30% in 2019 are: SasuHina, MadaTobi, GaaLee, KakaObi, HashiMada, KakaGai, MadaSaku and InoSaku. So, among those eight, 4 (3 obvious, and 1 tentative) are the ones which showed outstanding readers’ engagement!
 So, are newer, more energetic parts of fandom also the ones with best readers’ engagement? That would be a very optimistic message… But what about four ships that grew tremendously, but still show very poor readers behavior?
SasuHina is an easy case. If there exist a ship that has a captain, then it is this one. And the captain is @365daysofsasuhina​ who contributed staggering 438 fics (out of total of 966) to SasuHina! (Seriously, a round of standing ovation, because this is amount of dedication, work and talent that we can all only dream about. Talking about being a change you want to see!). And 90% of that contribution was done exactly in 2019, which explains the growth spurt of the ship. Sadly though, the audience response didn't keep up with the supply of new fics, therefore great many of them remain with very few comments.
So what about the remaining ones: KakaObi, HashiMadara and InoSaku?
Scrolling through the fic lists I noticed that great many of KakaObi fics are written in Chinese, so I decided to look into it deeper.
I analyzed the percentages of Chinese fics for all the examined ships (and percentages of English ones, just in case there was a ship with overrepresentation of some other language):
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And we can see that both KakaObi and HashiMada have a very strong presence of the Chinese fics!
At that point I thought I have it, and proceeded to look at the distribution of Comments for Chinese KakaObi and HashiMada fics. And indeed, the reader’s engagement is sadly, almost nonexistent (165 out of 182 HashiMada fics and 478 out of 630 KakaObi fics have no comments at all). The reasons for that may be multiple; one that come to my mind is that the Chinese readers are still to follow their writers to AO3, or that the fics published recently are in reality not new (which for sure they are not, given the sheer amount of them) and received already their share of feedback on other platforms.
But, even if one subtracts the Chinese fics from the overall fics, the distribution remains the same! ☹ KakaObi and HashiMada still display the standard Comment distribution, despite having grown 45% and 41% in the last year!
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It looks a bit better, but still follows standard, not very flattering trend of most of other ships.
So, then I thought that maybe if I subtract the Chinese fics the sudden growth in 2019 will disappear?
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The answer is unfortunately, no. The growth spurt is still there, language independent.
So, at this point I don’t know... I am convinced that there is some effect coming from the influx of Chinese fics, but I cannot put my finger on it. (It is also a beautiful example of how correlation does not equal causation.) I also have no explanation for InoSaku behavior…
  Nevertheless, I think it is possible to draw some conclusions, and those conclusions are of vital importance for the health of fandom as it is currently on the move from ff.net to AO3. And I would hate to see the good habits that are in place among ff.net readers getting lost during this move!
It seems that the readers response is better in the pockets of fandom that experience rapid growth, which in itself is very positive news. But one would think that the entirety of Naruto fandom is experiencing such growth (as the fandom is moving to AO3, remember…?). Unfortunately, it isn’t the case.
There can be yet another factor in play: namely the question if the ship is well represented on ff.net, and most of the ships are. Let’s take a final look at our three outliers: MadaTobi, KakaGai and MadaSaku.
Quick look into ff.net (by quick look I mean: sum of two main Ship Names plus Pairing Option minus fics that were double-tagged) shows that there are 174 KakaGai fics, 132 MadaTobi fics and 230 MadaSaku fics (my carefully calculated MadaSaku fic number was 232 in December 2019, so now I believe this number will be slightly higher).
MadaTobi and KakaGai are definitely underrepresented on ff.net (though MadaSaku is not). Therefore, new fics are not being published on ff.net in parallel to AO3, but rather on AO3 exclusively. It is a speculation only, but maybe if readers are given a choice between commenting on ff.net and on AO3, they are choosing the older platform.  That would imply that the authors who make a complete move can still count on feedback, as with absence of ff.net-uploaded fics the readers would have only one place to comment on. At least that’s my hope…
And finally, dear Naruto fandom – step it up. Those numbers are a shame, and I know that people can do better than this.
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letterboxd · 4 years ago
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Obsession.
Ella Kemp dives into Letterboxd’s 100 highest-rated, obsessively rewatched films of 2020 to find out why we love them—and to give Hollywood a heads-up on what we want to rewatch again and again.
Take note, development execs: we want to watch more of everything that makes us feel alive; that makes us feel thankful to be. To bottle that feeling, and drink it up as often, and as obsessively, as we like. We also want: more singing, more dancing, more drugs, more talking animals, more of whatever Director Bong is serving—and make everything gayer.
We know this because, a few years back, the Letterboxd team asked one very simple question: what’s the highest-rated film of all time, when the criteria is that you must have seen it five or more times? Not the ‘guilty’ pleasures, not the ‘so-bad-it’s-good’ gems, but the already-excellent films that are also inherently rewatchable. The resulting top 100 from back then are all extremely, objectively good. What can we say—you have great taste.
Because 2020 is, well, 2020, we revisited this idea to see how four years and an endless quarantine might have changed things. The usual suspects have been rounded up (Christopher, Quentin, Ridley, Damien, David and company), but a lot has shifted in the Highest Rated Obsessively Rewatched Club for 2020.
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The top ten in the 100 highest rated, obsessively rewatched films of 2020.
Céline Sciamma’s Portrait of a Lady on Fire is now top of the heap, where Spike Jonze’s Her was number one last time around. In fact, only Jaws and Carol remain from the last top ten. The Letterboxd community favors a wider world view: in 2017, the top 100 had only one film by a female director; in 2020 there are eight. The list has gone from exactly zero films entirely in languages other than English, to two (Portrait and Parasite), with several more containing a portion of non-English dialogue. Not quite leaping the one-inch tall barrier of subtitles, but it’s progress. And, there is substantially more LGBTQ+ representation all round.
This year’s top 100 shows that we still like to return to the idea of the auteur, and the challenge of a franchise. In 2017, Christopher Nolan was the filmmaker with the highest number of highly rated, obsessively rewatched films; in 2020 Quentin Tarantino has taken the lead, just ahead of Nolan. Joining them in the multiple-titles group are Edgar Wright, Peter Jackson, Joe and Anthony Russo, epic-scale filmmakers from whom we’ve learned so much, and whose films have more to offer the viewer on every watch. (When ratings are not part of the equation, Avengers: Endgame—still with a respectable 3.9 average—was the Most Obsessively Rewatched title of 2019. “You give me someone flying, turning invisible, super speed… that’s where I live,” explains obsessive rewatcher Max Joseph this Letterboxd interview. “In Endgame, I get a little bit of every genre and mood.”)
Obsessed with obsession
What is “obsessive”? To put some kind of parameters around the search for this year’s top 100, our team looked for the feature films that had five or more rated watches from a minimum of 150 Letterboxd members each, then we sorted that list by the ratings of those members.
But that word—“obsessive”—got me thinking. Just how obsessive are we talking here? It’s reassuring to know that Parasite is, naturally, a film we enjoy returning to, but when we’re talking about rewatches plural, what happens when we sort these 100 highly rated titles by another value: the number of diary entries logged by these obsessive members. And what would that list say about our tendencies as watchers?
Spoiler: we also pulled those numbers, and found an entirely different top ten:
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The most obsessively rewatched, highest-rated films of all time, as at 2020.
Look at that image. Compare it with the inarguable cinephilia of the ratings-based top ten, which soars on critical strength. What are we seeing here? That’s not the question. The real question is: what are we feeling? What do these ten films do to us so consistently, that helps them to retain high ratings across many, many, many rewatches?
You see, in the top 100, members typically log their favorites between five and seven times—but there’s a select handful of titles that see an average of up to 24 viewings per obsessive member. You read that right. There is a film on Letterboxd that multiple obsessive members have watched 24 times or more, at the time of writing.
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Comedy that never gets old
The film in question is Jemaine Clement and Taika Waititi’s What We Do in the Shadows, a genre-smart mockumentary about three vampire housemates just, well, pure vibing. It’s entirely in a league of its own, no doubt helped by a spin-off series, with the next entry, The Lonely Island’s Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping racking up an average of 17.7 rewatches per obsessive member.
These top two most obsessively rewatched titles make sense. When you’re feeling low, or when there’s some time to kill, what better place to turn than somewhere where the jokes never get old? As James writes on Letterboxd, Shadows “never fails to make me laugh”. Never fails. Taking a chance on a new comedy harbors its risks, so when you find the ones that work, you have to hold onto them like gold dust. It’s the sense of familiarity that comes from the same sharp, self-aware sketches, the endlessly quotable one-liners and screenshots that make memes feel like works of art.
(On that note, I asked the team: what were the highest-rated, obsessively rewatched comedy specials? No surprises: Bo Burnham’s masterful 2016 Netflix special Make Happy, and John Mulaney’s Kid Gorgeous at Radio City. Comedy is good when it catches you off guard—but in a pandemic, it’s even better when you can rely on it to deliver that same rush of endorphins, every time.)
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Thank you for the music
Speaking of pick-me-ups, ever notice how much better you feel after karaoke? Or, when you know everyone else has gone out so you can let rip across every inch of the house with ultimate privacy? The cathartic thrill that comes from a sing-along is what keeps our obsessive members returning to musicals, increasingly. There’s comfort in memorized lyrics; the words we yell and hold dear.
You’ve got this in Popstar (‘Finest Girl’, anyone?) and, crucially, in a double-bill of jukebox musicals celebrating ABBA’s greatest hits: Mamma Mia! and Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again. With fifteen rewatches on average for the former, and almost seventeen for the latter, the sequel’s slight upper hand proves the film’s triumphant formula—there really is an endless supply of ABBA bangers—but also that the repurposing of the most pivotal tracks (‘Mamma Mia’ and ‘Waterloo’) will work even better the second time around, due to the familiarity, both of the songs and now their new-found purpose in this world.
The feeling of singing along with Lily James as Donna, as she dances around Paris with her young Harry, of latching onto Cher’s every breath as she reunites with the eponymous Fernando—these moments become part of our own memory, and the satisfaction that comes from performing them again and again never fades. It’s also why so many musicals are rewatchable staples. Singin’ in the Rain, Rocketman, Bohemian Rhapsody and Pitch Perfect all feature in the top 100.
Out of interest, I asked the team to lift the curtain on non-narrative music films to see which greats we return to. Again, zero surprise (to me, at least): Jonathan Demme’s transcendent Talking Heads concert film Stop Making Sense is, and has long been, the highest-rated, most obsessively rewatched concert documentary on Letterboxd. And it’s only been a few months, but the Disney+ filmed version of Hamilton is up there, along with Homecoming: A Film by Beyoncé. #BEYHIVE, come in.
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Maybe we should trust love
At the other end of the spectrum, two titles in the most obsessively rewatched top ten point to our tendencies to find catharsis in our most extreme, most vulnerable expressions of emotion. Our two revealing films here are Love, Simon and Interstellar—one a grounded and sensitive coming-of-age picture of a teenage boy’s coming out, the other an epic space-travel thriller. Still, both films understand that, ultimately, love transcends all.
These films make room for us to revisit these most searing feelings, of love hidden, lost, afraid or universal, they let us cry out what we relate to, and escape into whichever onscreen emotions we prefer to project ourselves into beyond our own lives, time and time again. Because however much changes, you know you’ll always crave and be rewarded by love. (And by the existential exploration that often accompanies these big feelings: Don Hertzfeldt's World of Tomorrow is the highest-rated, most obsessively rewatched short film with Letterboxd members.)
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Ink spots and needle drops
The idea of projection—of escape beyond our own lives—comes back often when thinking of the rewatch. But certain titles reveal how we choose to find escape in a quite literal form; observe the love for Tangled, rewatched on average ten times per obsessive member.
And then there’s Shrek 2, revisited on average 7.9 times (more on this bizarre, outstanding oddity on its own soon). The leap of faith into an animated world is one that offers a blank canvas painted over with new colors: the pastel pinks and soft peach oranges of sunset skies in Tangled, the rich purples and blues of the twinkling lights of the afterlife in Coco, the playful blue waters of Moana, with the sun giving everything a new glow. Animation works as relaxation here, clearing the mind and coloring it calmly time and time again. Elsa said it first: you can, and should, let it all go.
It is entirely probable, of course, that no Letterboxd parent is logging the Frozens—or any other animated family film, for that matter—as often as their household is actually watching them, the truth of which would completely upend this data. We know the math underpinning this whole exercise is somewhat arbitrary, but it’s an interesting starting point from which to analyze why certain things just work, again and again.
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Take the oddity that is Shrek 2, deserving of its own dissection purely because of how masterfully it combines so many of the previously established elements. This film and its predecessor create so many vivid images that fit into the category of animated escapism, but music plays a major part, also. ‘Accidentally In Love’ by Counting Crows as Shrek and Fiona blissfully enjoy their honeymoon period; ‘Funky Town’ by Lipps Inc. as Shrek, Fiona and Donkey roll into Far Far Away; Jennifer Saunders as Fairy Godmother, with her sublime cover of Bonnie Tyler’s ‘Holding Out For A Hero’. There are too many perfect needle-drop moments to count, and every time the rewatch comes around, they feel new.
Add to the comforting visuals and euphoric music the countless one-liners, perfectly performed by Eddie Murphy and Mike Myers, but really, here, Rupert Everett as Prince Charming—a squirm-inducing, note-perfect pantomimic performance. Shrek 2 might just be the defining example of what makes a good movie the best movie, and one that only grows greater with every rewatch. Lucky us.
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Festive fever
The inclusion of A Christmas Story, the second-last in our most rewatched top ten, makes sense when considering the times in our lives when we turn to movies for comfort (and discomfort: note the Hallowe’en-related rewatchables in the top 100). A Christmas Story might not be your first festive choice, but you will have your own equivalent. The Muppet Christmas Carol also made the top 100, with Elf, Love, Actually and the Home Alone movies bubbling under. We recognize all the beats, and seeing as the holidays return each year, it’s natural that we return to the titles that make us feel most at home within them.
Like Carol. Darling Carol. The last of our top ten most most most rewatched. Flung out of space into our eyeballs by Todd Haynes as some sort of Christmas miracle, its rewatchability as much seasonal as it is about love, representation, vintage glamor and that final scene. Let’s see where Happiest Season sits this time next year, shall we?
And so, what can filmmakers and distributors learn from what we want to see, not just once, but again and again? In just four years the list of titles the Letterboxd community has chosen to revisit and protect has blossomed with an open heart and feverishly enthusiastic mind.
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Looking over the top 100 highest-rated, obsessively rewatched films in 2020, we want more queer love: Portrait, Moonlight and Carol but also Booksmart, The Favourite, Call Me by Your Name. We definitely need more singing and dancing: Suspiria, La La Land, Singin’ in the Rain, Mamma Mia and beyond.
We want more adventure, more time travel, more mind-melters, more drinking, exploring, investigating, more talking animals, more drugs, more laughs, more tears, more goosebumps. We want more full-body feelings of falling in love with a movie you know you’ll hold onto with everything you’ve got.
In the end, numbers can only tell us so much, and these numbers are drawn from what we’ve already seen, which is what’s already managed to make it through the system. There’s as much to learn from how these films were made as there is from what they’re about. Because, no matter how many AI tools people dream up to help with the green-lighting process, moviemaking is fundamentally about magic. And when all the right ingredients make it into the cauldron, the spell can be so strong that a film will win our hearts forever.
Related content
The Highest-Rated Obsessively Rewatched Club for 2020
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crusherthedoctor · 5 years ago
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In the Hall of the Would Be King
“Hmm...”
“No, that won't work...”
“Too similar...”
“Not using another brainless monster, not without a catch...”
“If I can find another Conch... Nah...”
“I could just steal the Master Emerald again...”
"Maybe I can use Metal's copied data samples for something...”
"Refine the Slow-Down Shoes perhaps...?”
In his newest lab, surrounded by faint darkness, the aspiring conquerer was hard at work on a new plan to ensure his domination... or at least, he would be hard at work, if he didn't have schemer's block. Though the doctor had many ideas circling around in his head, he dismissed each of them for one reason or another, having taken their chances of working out - or lack thereof - into account. Needless to say, he was not in the cheeriest of mindsets as a result.
“Maybe a virus would do the trick, I haven't tried that sort of method before...” Eggman mused to himself, tapping his pencil idly against the desk where his currently empty sheets of paper were positioned. Normally his papers would be used up with elaborate thoughts and schematics, but this was not the case today. Not a single bullet point or diagram could be found on any of them. He frowned as he stroked his chin in thought. “But such a thing would take ages to prepare, and it could easily escape my control if I'm not careful... bah...”
He lightly tossed his pencil aside, and he slumped on his chair, his wide moustache drooping just a little. He hated it when his imagination came to a road block. Not just because it meant he couldn't be productive with his time and brainwaves, but also because it would pave the way instead for more time to reflect on... him.
He tiredly rubbed his hairless cranium at the mere thought of that meddlesome hedgehog, the one who had thwarted his expertly devised plans, and his immaculately constructed machines, every single time, for what felt like generations. Everything about that hedgehog bothered him to no end. His ridiculous face, his endless taunting, his undeserved luck... How he loathed him so... And how he loathed those irritating theories spread about how he secretly liked him and would regret defeating him for good.
Absolute nonsense, he thought, with a loud bristle of his 'stache. Far as he's concerned, any respect towards the hedgehog is purely on an academic level, directed towards his power and the admittedly entertaining challenge he brings. On a personal level, he wants nothing less than to see his cocky mug six feet under at the bottom of the ocean, and that will never change one iota. He may like his fun, but he's always been serious about obtaining his empire. Why would he go out of his way to postpone his own victory?
“Confound that Sonic,” Eggman quietly muttered, a sneer visibly planting itself on his face. “No matter what I whip up, the conclusion remains the same. How does he always win? What is it I'm missing...? What miscalculation...”
True, he had underestimated his nemesis a couple of times in the past, and the same applied to the hedgehog's increasing number of colorful aquaintances. But he's gotten wiser over time, on top of his already established scientific brilliance, so why did Sonic remain the eternal victor even now?
The doctor scoffed, as he crossed his arms in a muted huff. Surely it couldn't be because of all those friends the hedgehog had. Not when half of his victories were on his own. Not when Eggman himself had far more resources than all of them combined. Not when half the time, Knuckles was on his side, although to be fair, that trick stopped working quite a while ago. And yet... Sonic does always go on about how friendship is everything to him... That's why he's always spouting drivel about teamwork, right?
Maybe the argument of strength in comrades had some degree of logic to it, even if only a little. Sonic's closest sidekick does share a similarly impressive IQ, though still considerably below the doctor's own, in his generous and humble opinion. Since he entered the scene, Tails had always been making planes, ships, and all other sorts of technological doodads, and though they would rarely rival the sheer scale of Eggman's own contraptions, the fox boy's expertise in his own right could not be denied. Though he despised the fox just as much as he did the fox's idol, Eggman could admit that with Tails, he would always be guaranteed an intellectual back and forth. More than can be said for Sonic, who preferred to speak in outdated catchphrases that he could never comprehend the utter inanity of.
Eggman's sneer loosened, as he contemplated further, though it didn't disappear entirely. His biggest dream had always been to be recognised as the best and most beloved genius there ever was. Yet for all his efforts, everyone feared and hated him, because what, he fires a missile at the occasional city? He corrupts the occasional alien species into violent monsters? He pays the occasional media to publicly slander the hedgehog and his friends? Meanwhile, that loathesome piñata of spines was always the one who gained everyone's love and respect with minimum effort... the love and respect that belonged to him.
Why couldn't anyone on this entire globe see that he should be the one everyone should idolize. That he should be the one everyone should parade around like a reclaimed treasure. That he should be the one everyone wants to be friends with-
“How's the plan coming along, doc?”
“BUZZ OFF.”
“Alright then, see ya,” Cubot casually mumbled with a salute, as he left the room as quickly as he entered it.
He turned his head back to his empty papers, very much agitated. His mood was always at its worst when Sonic was on the brain, to the surprise of few. So what if Sonic was the world's fastest thing alive? Eggman was the world's greatest scientist alive. Making new innovations and paving the way for a better future (from a certain point of view) was far more worthy of high esteem than simply running around with your arms outstretched like an airplane. Stupid animal, wrecking apart his glorious monuments of technology like they're nothing.
Still, what monuments of technology they were...
He thought back to when he created the Egg Dragoon, and how he and Sonic - in an alternate and frankly bizarre form - duked it out towards the heart of the world. Despite the outcome being the same as most of their battles, he looked back fondly on the memory, if only because he remained proud of that particular creation in spite of its untimely demise. Why wouldn't he? It had more weapons than you could shake a ring at, its design was awe-inspiring without compromising its practical purposes, AND it could withstand the extreme temperatures of the planet's core with no issue whatsoever. It was one of his biggest breakthroughs, and this was a man who considered everything he ever made a breakthrough.
Well, almost everything. The Egg Dealer was made on an off day.
His lips curled into a smile, and he rested his legs on his desk, crossing them after the fact. As he clasped his hands by his rotund chest, he lifted his mood back up as his thoughts shifted from his enemy to his achievements. He was so delighted to finally bring Eggmanland to life that same day. He never quite decided on what exactly he wanted it to be as the years went by - one day it would be a city, the next day it would be a theme park - but when it finally went under construction, he was more than happy with the results by jamming all his ideas for it together. Sonic may have ultimately conquered it, but at least he got to see his much longed paradise in the metallic flesh for a brief moment... and it certainly wasn't an easy endeavor for the accursed pincushion regardless. He made sure of that much.
The Death Egg was another one he always had a soft spot for, no matter how many times Sonic sent it plummeting. It was the doctor's first project of such a scale, and its design remained emblematic of everything the mad scientist stood for... himself, and nothing else. Simplicity can do just fine sometimes. He laughed merrily as he recalled all his additional Death Eggs, and all his additional spacecraft that might as well have been the Death Egg, like the Cosmic Angel, and the Egg Utopia. He always did like the view from space... mainly because he got to look over what he considered his kingdom.
Sonic always questioned how he constantly had the money to make all his material, particularly his intimidating doomsday devices, and his consistently oversized fortresses. Alas, that would remain his secret. But who said he was shortsighted enough to only have a single means of obtaining his investments...? For all his childish habits, he was remarkably shrewd when it came to maintaining his finances. He would certainly hope so, that's for sure. What sight would be more embarrassing than a revolutionary without a penny?
And of course, there was Metal Sonic. Still one of his finest inventions to date, and track record of defeats aside, time and advancements have only reaffirmed that in a way. He remembered how unashamedly excited he was when he first witnessed his prized subject in action, particularly after witnessing its raw speed, having realised he had successfully created something that would give even its flesh and blood copy a run for his money in the very field he prided himself on. There was a reason that whereas other models and units came and went, Metal always remained by his side. He was undoubtedly a special robot to Eggman, and questionable though it may be, he eventually grew to see Metal as something of a son... Ironic, given who he was based on.
In fact, in retrospect, Eggman couldn't even bring himself to reflect that angrily on the Egg Fleet takeover, for as utterly humiliating as the experience was for him at the time, it at least validated the genius of Metal's programming, and how it brought the copycat's power to new heights.
Not sure what his appearance was going for at the time, though. That was a bit too tacky even for him to stomach. And you know, a betrayal's a betrayal, so he still had to be taught a lesson. He was only slightly more forgiving when it turned out that Metal had simply overloaded with all that power, as opposed to him actively calculating to upstage his master. He made sure that wouldn't happen again if the robot underwent any future upgrades... both the overloading and the poor fashion sense.
Even so, Metal was a testament to artificial intelligence, and a pinnacle of robotics. The doctor leaned back on his chair once more, cackling some more, followed by a sigh of satisfaction. He's made so many great things over the years, hasn't he? Of course he has. If he hadn't, he wouldn't be Ivo Robotnik, would he?
Suddenly, he paused, as his own surname flashed through his mind.
And with that soon came the memory of a different Robotnik altogether. That being, of course, his long departed grandfather.
His face quickly changed once again, this time neither happy nor angry.
Instead... there was conflict.
Once upon a time, he had nothing but praise for the memory of Gerald Robotnik, citing him as the inspiration to try his own hand at the world of science in the first place. Bloodline aside, perhaps it was no coincidence that they looked so strikingly alike. As a kid, he never actually saw Gerald in person, as the latter's occupation meant he was constantly hard at work on the latest concept that would revolutionize the world. Even so, he knew how amazing he was, and he admired all the intellectual prowess that he showed in his lifetime, even if he didn't particularly care for the whole "benefit of mankind" side of it.
But after that incident aboard the A.R.K... his thoughts weren't quite the same since then. He hated having to team up with that wretched hedgehog in order to ensure he had a world to conquer, as the one thing a genius like him hates more than even Sonic is having no control over anything. But his resentment over the incident went deeper than that. He still admired Gerald's intelligence, and still pointed to it as what led to the man that he is today, but the idea that his own grandfather may not have given a second thought about his own extremely gifted grandson's demise in the fallout of the A.R.K's collision course... was not an easy reality for him to consider. Even if they never met each other per say, did he really mean that little to Gerald?
And all because of his despair over Maria, the other grandchild...
The lesser one, Eggman thought bitterly, as he clenched his fist on the desk in a deceptively tranquil fit of stress. While Gerald was always too busy for young Ivo (and come to think of it, so were his parents, though that didn't matter as much), he had all the time in the world for Maria. Supposedly because of some illness or other that he dedicated his life to finding a cure for... but still, why did he hold her up high on a pedestal so much? Granted, Eggman never knew his cousin that well either, but what did she do to deserve it? SHE wasn't the one who made advanced automations during their school years, and anyway, if it hadn't been for her, Gerald wouldn't have gone insane and came close to wiping HIM from existence.
The doctor had no physical memorabilia of his grandfather, and it was always a secret desire to have at least one photo, no matter how old. But he also realised that even if he had one, it would have a likely chance of including the golden-haired child right beside him. For the sake of not having to witness the apparent bias at work, that was not designed in his own favor, perhaps it was for the best.
As he slumped further on his egg-shaped chair, he recalled to his own misfortune that it wasn't simply Maria on her own. By all accounts, Gerald seemed to favor another child over him as well... his pet project, to be exact. The Ultimate Lifeform.
The doctor's feelings on Shadow were every bit as messy, complicated, and a touch regretful. On one hand, he hated Shadow just like the rest. For making a fool out of him and causing the A.R.K. fallout to begin with, and for subsequently going on to join G.U.N. and oppose him alongside all those other anthropomorphic piles of sassy misery... along with that worthless traitor, E-123 Omega. His entire routine with the Shadow Androids was in part an act of petty revenge, to make the black hedgehog feel like a fool himself. An eye for an eye, as they say.
But at the same time... it didn't have to be this way. Eggman was perfectly aware that Shadow wasn't entirely on a different wavelength from him. Despite their dissimilar attitudes, their views were often in-tune with each other, and if there's one thing Eggman likes, it's when someone agrees with him wholeheartedly. They were both smart, and they could both see the grander picture. Not to mention their somewhat familial relation, even if they weren't literally related by blood. They agreed that the world had its issues, and the situation with Gerald was something that caused problems for both of them. It was also no secret that Shadow wasn't necessarily on buddy ol' pal terms with Sonic, especially when compared to the likes of the pink hedgehog, whose endless fawning never ceased to evade the doctor's approval and understanding. By all means, Shadow would understand Eggman's need for control, right...? Would he not take up the offer to help spread that control, and purge the world and beyond of all that could stand in the way of progression...?
No, it would seem not. Shadow considered Eggman's ideas a step too far into the realm of moral depravity (and perhaps absurdity), and never hesitated to inform him of that in blunt terminology. In Shadow's eyes, Eggman may be Professor Gerald's successor, but deep down, he was more comparable to Black Doom. Nothing more than scum in its purest form. At least, that was the impression that the doctor was given ever since the Ultimate Lifeform switched sides.
Is it possible... If he were still alive, and had he not gone off the deep end...
Would Gerald have felt the same way as his creation...?
Would he have disapproved of his grandson's actions...?
Would he have cast doubt on the path he's chosen in life...?
...Hmph. Who cares. What does it matter, when he ended up hardly a perfect bastion of selflessness either...
Eggman sighed to himself, born out of simultaneous acceptance and resignation. After all the time that had passed since the incident, it was still as clear as yesterday to him. He was forced to learn that day that for all his strengths, Gerald Robotnik was flawed like any other being... and those flaws came at Eggman's own expense, which was the important thing. He rested his elbows on his desk with his uniquely shaped head in his hands, almost prepared to sleep the night away to escape the depressing reality surrounding his childhood hero's shortcomings. No one was perfect, except himself.
Besides, he reasoned. Even Gerald apparently failed to unlock the mystery of the Ethereal Zone...
………...
………...
………...
Wait.
Wait.
Eggman slowly raised his head, as if a light bulb inside had just been set to maximum. His body tensed up. There was no obvious emotion on his face, and yet the glint in his glasses seemed to shine that little bit more as he processed his fresh revelation. After a brief period of uneasy silence, sitting as still as a statue...
He catapulted from his chair without warning, and almost broke the door open to the right of his lab with his surprising strength, revealing a flight of stairs that descended into the unknown. He rushed down the stairs like a madman, his feet gliding faster than all those times he escaped the blue hedgehog on foot, yet he did not stumble for a second, for despite his sudden frantic behaviour, he was very much focused. He went further and further down, the shadows below inviting him to continue the path that suggested great promise... or damnation.
Though he would have taken the time to admire the gargantuan portraits of himself on the walls in any other instance, each of them in their own over-enthusiastic poses, he neglected to take a moment to do even that, such was the speed of his feet as well as his brain. When he finally got to the bottom, he slammed a second door wide open, which revealed what appeared to be a personal library of sorts, filled to the brim with notes and publications about a wide variety of subjects that, with a few exceptions, nonetheless pertained mostly to science and history. Even in this personal library, a magnificent golden statue of his own self stood tall in the middle of the room, its muscular arms holding up the roof as if it were the mighty Atlas, complete with a flattering six pack that was, let's say, visually ambiguous on the real doctor's own person.
Eggman scanned the rows of books to no end, his concealed eyes darting left and right at a speed worthy of his nemesis. He sprinted towards the row furthest on the left, starting from A and working from there. Most of his books were made by a certain author that he was very familiar with, right down to inhabiting his body, but he possessed some of the late Gerald's documents as well here and there. The more he thought about it, there was that one that he never got around to reading. He had obtained it way back in the day... must have been around the time of the Flicky Island siege... but if he remembered the cover correctly, he was absolutely certain it related to what just clicked in his head. It wasn't about the Ultimate Lifeform, or his Prototype, or the Chaos units, or the Black Arms, or the Gizoid, or even the A.R.K. itself… it was something else entirely, of which he only knew the name of. And though Gerald's pursuits were often connected to each other, this one might have been before all that...?
“Is there something you need, doctor?” asked the timely arrival of Orbot, as he made his own way down the stairs in a mild hurry. “I heard a spot of noise a moment ago, and...”
He already concluded that the doctor wasn't listening, as he was much too focused on finding that one book. He paced along the aisles like a hungry tiger, yet his eyes were glancing up and down repeatedly, faster and faster. It wasn't in the A aisle, wasn't in the B aisle, nor in the C aisle, or the D... Wisp books... Little Planet books... cooking books... where was it, he thought to himself in a jumbled combination of giddiness and frustration that frequently clashed with each other by the second. He gritted his teeth slightly. Where was that one blasted book. He swore to himself that if Cubot lost it, or if he placed it out of alphabetical order in the wrong aisle - even by the second letter - then he would gladly rearrange his scrapped remains into a Dreamcast so functional that he could play Skies of Spagonia on-
...No. That won't be necessary. Not today. For it finally came into view, in the G aisle, thankfully the correct placement in this case. Fitted tightly between the sleeper hit of “The Games of Dr. Eggman”, and the somewhat rarer “The Glory of Man: An Ivo Robotnik Story”, sat one lone book... a hefty one from the looks of it, even compared to those by its immediate left and right. Using the uncanny length of his right arm, he effortlessly picked it out, its weight resulting in no visible strain on his part. Not even a second into looking at the cover, he could already tell for sure that this was the very one, as it was marked with a rather beautiful array of different colours, almost every colour of the rainbow at that. It was capped off with sharp white outlines that appeared to resemble translucent crystals, each complex outline forming a circle all together, like the shining rays of the sun. The title, in thick white bold, was upfront about its subject:
The Gems of Heaven, by Professor Gerald Robotnik A study of Viridonia and its phenomena
Without a word, he scrambled through the pages, not giving the slightest concern towards the proud history of this region, nor its sights, nor its cultures... only one thing was on his mind, which was already beginning to make a sinister calculation even at this primordial moment. Flashes of colour were passing through the pages, with photos so awe inspiring that anyone else would have taken a moment to savor… Until at last, his speedy page turning came to a very abrupt halt. It was as if time itself grieved. He found the part he was looking for... to the unknown regret of the rest of the population...
“Is something wrong?” Orbot asked, more timidly this time. He was facing the back of his creator, and he had no idea what mood he was in, though given what he overheard earlier at Cubot's expense, he could have made an easy guess. The master still didn't respond, what with his intense fixation on what he was reading. Despite the plentiful amount of pages dedicated to the chapter in question, his mental process was breezing through it. His eyes finally slowed down, and he took the time to read it through a second time, though still rather quickly compared to that of the average person.
All of a sudden, he closed the book shut. It made a notable echo in the room, enough to make his servant flinch. His shoulders rose a single time, then relaxed back down, as if a weight had been lifted off of them.
“Doctor...?”
“We have work to do,” Eggman finally answered. His voice was calm... uncharacteristically so. “A lot of work. Perhaps I shall rebuild some old friends to help us out... In the meantime, set a course for Viridonia, immediately.”
“Viridonia? Never heard of that one... whatever, got it,” Orbot complied without argument. “Let's just hope Sonic doesn't obtain another new pesky friend to his collection when he inevitably catches on to us, hmm?” He was about to head back upstairs, but he hesitated for a moment, and raised a finger as he turned back to the doctor. “You are okay though, right doctor?”
Eggman stood still for a few seconds, though Orbot could see his head raising ever so slightly. He slowly turned to the robot's direction, counter clockwise... and with it, a perfect grin on his face. Orbot had seen that maniacal grin so many times before, so surely he would be used to it... Yet in his heart of circuits - maybe it was due to how it glistened in the shadows - he could immediately sense that something was off with this one... more than usual anyway... He didn't like it.
This was it, the scientist thought.
With uncontested proof, everyone would at last be left with no argument, as they finally witness the day.
The day he officially surpasses his grandfather to the world.
Even if the world has to suffer for it.
“Never felt better.”
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fand0mfancies · 4 years ago
Text
Came across this on Tumblr a few days ago, it amused me for a couple of hours or more, filling it in, while watching QI.
 Fandom Questions
 1. What was the first fandom you got involved in?
Star Trek: Voyager, I suppose at least for reading. Started writing with Stargate SG-1.
 2. What is your latest fandom?
I dip in and out of lots of fandoms on and off, the most recent ‘pick up’ is Ballam from Eastenders, I don’t watch soaps, but Robron and Ballam both appear a good bit on my tumblr, so I eventually gave in to checking them out via fic and youtube – thank god for youtube, lol! I still don’t watch soaps, but I watch those storylines!
 3. What is the best fandom you’ve ever been involved in?
Gosh, that’s... actually no that’s really easy. Primeval. For anyone not familiar, it’s a ‘silly little dinosaur show’ produced in the UK. It had 4 short seasons, with a somewhat revolving main cast – although they managed to keep 3 of them through all 4 seasons – but the fandom was/is amazing. I made life long friends through the fandom and even though I don’t write much any more I still read some and still talk with those people.
 4. Do you regret getting involved in any fandoms?
I would say no. I can’t say every fandom has always been amazing – ship wars anyone! – but mostly fandom has been a very positive experience in my life.
 5. Which fandoms have your written fanfiction for?
How long have you got... in genuinely no particular order (basically as they came to me) Stargate SG-1, Stargate Atlantis, Star Trek (TNG, DS9, Voy, Ent & Reboot Movies), Marvel, Kingsman, Person of Interest, Due South, Quantum Leap, Firefly, Buffy/Angel verse, Harry Potter, The Sentinel, Torchwood(/Doctor Who), Hawaii Five-0, Shadowhunters, Sherlock, Primeval, Emmerdale (Robron), NCIS, CSI (Vegas, NY & Miami), White Collar, Empire Records, Bull, Diagnosis Murder, MacGyver (the original), 1-800-Missing, CHAOS, Without a Trace, M*A*S*H, Charmed, Queer as Folk (US), Will & Grace, Bring it On, Nash Bridges, Magnificent 7 (TV series), House, Babylon 5 – I think I got them all... a few of those were one time only deals, but a lot of them have more (anywhere from 2-52 (or more still!) ranging from 100 word drabbles, to thousands of words – hey I’ve been writing fic for 21 years... you tend to amass a lot of fandoms...
 6. List your OTP from each fandom you’ve been involved in.
Oh geez, here we go, lol! Okay...
 Stargate SG-1: Jack O’Neill/Daniel Jackson
Stargate Atlantis: Rodney McKay/John Sheppard
Star Trek: Elim Garak/Julian Bashir, Chakotay/Tom Paris, Jonathan Archer/Malcolm Reed, James Kirk/Spock – I don’t particularly have an ‘otp’ in TNG, the couple I’ve written were Picard/Data, I’ve also dabbled reading Data/Gordi)
Marvel: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Kingsman: Harry Hart/Eggsy Unwin
Person of Interest: Harold Finch/John Reese
Due South: Benton Fraser/Ray K
Quantum Leap: Sam/Al
Firefly: Malcolm Reynolds/Simon Tam
Buffy/Angel Verse: Buffy/Giles, Angel/Spike, Xander/Spike, Willow/Tara
Harry Potter: Harry/Draco, Harry/Hermione, Harry/Hermione/Draco
The Sentinel: Jim/Blair
Torchwood: Jack/Ianto
Hawaii Five-O: Steve/Danno
Shadowhunters: Magnus/Alec
Sherlock: Sherlock/John, Mycroft/Lestrade
Primeval: Nick Cutter/Stephen Hart, James Lester/Hilary Becker Emmerdale: Robert Sugden/Aaron Dingle
NCIS: Gibbs/DiNozzo CSI: Nick Stokes/David Hodges, Mac/Danny, Horatio/Speed White Collar: Neal/Peter/Elizabeth
Empire Records: Joe/Lucas
Bull: Benny/Jason
Diagnosis Murder: Steve/Jesse
 I’ve left a few out where I don’t have particular OTPs
 7. List your NoTPs from each fandom you’ve been in.
Here we go again... lol!
 Stargate SG-1: Jack/Sam, I just... no. I’ve read a few where it’s a background or secondary pairing, but it always makes me wince a bit. I’ve read a few with Sam/Daniel as a secondary pairing that didn’t make me react that way and I’ve read Sam with other characters, but Jack/Sam just is a nope for me.
Stargate Atlantis: McKay/Keller – no, just no. that was horrible. She treated him like... awfully, trying to change him to suit her, just... no.
Marvel: Contentious, but Tony/Pepper, also Peter Parker/Tony Stark. Maybe because I saw the movies before I ever looked at the comics, but meh.
Due South: Benton Fraser/Ray V – again, contentious, but honestly I think Ray V was kind of a shit friend to Fraser.
Firefly: Anything with Jayne. No really, I just can not stand the character. I spent most of the series wanting to punch him in the face and sometimes you get characters you love to hate, but I just hated him.
Buffy/Angel Verse: Buffy/Spike, Willow/Kennedy
Harry Potter: Ron/Hermione, Ron/Harry, Harry/Ginny... basically, Ron and Ginny should just be loveless hermits who live by themselves. Ok, no, that isn’t fair... but as much as Ron was Harry’s first friend, he was selfish and bitter and Ginny/Harry just... never sat right with me. Ron literally says she spent ‘all summer talking about’ Harry, when she’d met him for all of three seconds. She didn’t know him. It always felt like she fell more in love with the *idea* of Harry Potter, than Harry Potter himself.
Sherlock: Sherlock/Molly, he’d eat her for breakfast. Serious, she’d never survive him.
Primeval: Oliver Leek and anyway. Arg. Creepy little dude is creepy and evil.
NCIS: Ziva/DiNozzo – ugh, just no.
 Again, I’ve left out ones where I don’t have particular NoTPs
 8. How did you get involved in your latest fandom?
Tumblr, god damned bitches posting gifs of pretty boys falling in love, roped me in!
 9. What are the best things about your current fandom?
I dabble in several fandoms at once... but if we go by ‘most recently picked up’ as ‘current’ we’re talking Ballum, which hey, it’s always fun to have an actual canon pairing be my OTP, that’s rare for me, lol.
 10.  Is there a fandom you read fic from but don’t write in?
Well (so far) I haven’t written any Ballum. (I say so far, because I’m a realist, lol). I rarely read in fandoms and not end up writing in them at some point. Although I have probably dabbled in a few I’ve not written for, but if I read it with any sort of consistency, I mostly end up writing it. I am weak!
  Ship Questions for your Current Fandom
 11. Who is your current OTP?
Okay, so that list above, just basically go with that. While I do drop in and hour of fandoms and some I certainly read in more than others, I do tend to go back to fandoms... If we were talking about what I’m mostly focused on writing atm... Steve/Tony, Mycroft/Lestrade, Harry/Draco and Robron are ones I’m currently working on most.
 12. Who is your current OT3?
I’m not currently writing anything that’s OT3 with any real focus. I have a couple of Neal/Peter/Elizabeth WiPs that I will at some point finish, but they aren’t a big focus just now. I did recently read a fabulous Neal/Peter/Elizabeth fic that’s been on my tbr list for ages.
 13. Any NoTPs?
Just... see above, lol!
 14. Go on, who are your BroTPs?
Harry Hart/Merlin, those two are Bro’s until the end and I will fight you on this. Also, Eggsy/Roxy! OMG they are such a BroTP! And Tony/Pepper/Rhodey – I may no like Tony/Pepper as a pairing, but I love them as best friends and of course, our Rhodes, because again, I will fight you on this, they are awesome and Tony needs his best friends!
 15. Is there an obscure ship which you love?
I’m not sure there is. I suppose I’ve read a few fics for some random pairings over the years, but nothing that’s made me really ship-ship them. I like Clint Barton/Bucky Barnes, after seeing it as a secondary pairing in a Steve/Tony fic, but I’ve seen that pop up a few times since, so maybe it won’t stay obscure for long!
 16. Are their any popular ships in your fandom which you dislike?
Jack/Sam, Tony/Pepper, Ron/Hermione, Harry/Ginny, Buffy/Spike – they all seem to be het pairings, oops. But I am mostly a slash fic reader/writer, so I suppose that’s not too surprising.
 17. Who was your first OTP and are they still your favourite?
Jack/Daniel from Stargate SG-1. I still love them. I still read them, although it has been a while since I’ve written them on their own (I have got some SG-1/SGA x-overs where they feature)
 18. What ship have you written the most about?
I’m genuinely not sure... without going and counting (and I’m not going any counting!) I’d guess Jack/Daniel, McKay/Sheppard, Jack/Ianto and Steve/Danno.
 19. Is there a ship which you wished you could get behind, but you just don’t feel them?
No, not that I can think off. I either like it or not. I do occasionally feel bad for not reading a fic if it’s an author I really like, but I don’t read that fandom or pairing, but nothing specific.
 20. Any ships which you surprised yourself by liking?
Robron and Ballum, lol. I do not do soaps!
  Author Questions
 21. What was the first fanfic you ever wrote?
 Stargate SG-1, Jack/Daniel, a story called The Dare, The Disaster, The Almost Happy Ending, And The Very Happy Ending – it was awful. Don’t go looking, lol!
 22. Is there anything you regret writing?
Don’t we all? No, I wouldn’t specifically say so. There are certainly fics, especially older ones, I wish I could have written better, but nothing I’d go, ugh I should never have done that.
 23. Name a fic you’ve written that you’re especially fond of & explain why you like it.
Uh... honestly that’s really hard. I... um... yeah, I don’t know, really. I wrote a nice little flower one in POI that I felt worked rather beautifully. The Language of Flowers. An I wrote an SGA fic for NaNo a few years ago, called A Different Life, but it’s not online, because I didn’t finish it yet and I knew I wasn’t going to finish it any time soon, so I didn’t feel it was fair to leave it up unfinished (there is a reason I don’t read WiP fics and I don’t post them either, because I know how much I hate unfinished WiPs) Edit: After writing this I reminded myself of a POI fic I wrote called Hours of Separation – It’s a Harold/John break up story that I always intended to write a sequel too where I ‘fixed’ them, but I just couldn’t do it. I broke them a little too well. But I really love it actually.
 24. What fic do you desperately need to rewrite or edit?
The afore mentioned A Different Life needs to be edited and finished, lol! Also a Primeval fic with the working title Crypt Keeper (don’t ask) that I worked myself into a bit of a corner on and I figure out how to fix it, but I haven’t done it yet, so it’s still needs fixing and finishing, lol!
 25. What’s your most popular fanfic?
I haven’t the foggiest.
 26. How do you come up with your fanfic titles?
Sometimes, really easily, a quote, a line from the fic, a song title... other times it’s like pulling teeth, hence working titles on things like ‘crypt keeper’ which is a reference to one scene near the very start and has no actual hint of the plot, lol!
 27. What do you hate more: Coming up with titles or writing summaries?
Oh the titles. Summaries you can just copy a few lines from the fic if you are desperate, if you had to post ‘untitled mcshep fic #67’ people would get cranky, lol, hell I’d get cranky!
 28. If someone were to draw a piece of fanart for your story, which story would it be and what would the picture be of?
Oh... I... huh. I mean who wouldn’t love fanart for their stories? Any of them honestly! But if I had to choose just one... I guess something in my Animal Instinct verse, which is Primeval (although I always intended to write other fandoms in the verse) where some people transform into animals, based on their ‘spirit animal’ and some art of the characters with their spirit animal form would be awesome.
 29. Do you have a beta reader? Why/Why not?
Sometimes, look if you’ve read this far, you know I write in a lot of fandoms, lol. In some fandoms it’s easier than others to find beta readers. Also, sometimes if it’s just something short, I won’t bother. But I do try for my longer fics.
 30. What inspires you to write?
That old adage, if you want to read it, sometimes you just have to write it? Spite? Boredom? Honestly sometimes I just have ideas I have to get out of my brain and it’s write or go mad(der)
 31. What’s the nicest thing someone has ever said about your writing?
That it inspired them to write something.
 32. Do you listen to music when you write or does music inspire you? If so, which band or genre of music does it for you?
Sometimes, sometimes I find it distracting when writing because I end up singing along and forgetting what I’m writing, lol! I do sometimes get inspiration from songs, I guess mostly from the lyrics, but no particular band or genre – although I listen to a lot of country music!
 33. Do you write oneshots, multi-chapter fics or huuuuuge epics?
Little from column a, little from column b... littler still from column c...
 34. What’s the word count on your longest fic?
Around 60k, I think.
 35. Do you write drabbles? If so, what do you normally write them about?
I have. Primeval had/has a week drabble challenge, mostly when I’ve written drabbles it’s been for a challenge, with a specific prompt.
 36. What’s your favourite genre to write?
Uh... I mean, my fandoms really span the genres, but I guess sci-fi or crime are probably my favourites.
 37. First person or third person - what do you write in and why?
Third mostly, I have occasionally written in first person, if it felt like the fic needed it.
 38. Do you use established canon characters or do you create OCs?
Little from column a, little from column b... it depends on the fandom and the story. Sometimes you just need more characters, mostly they are minor roles, I don’t tend to write much established character/oc fic
 39. What is your greatest strength as a writer?
Ability to convince myself people will want to read it, lol! No actually to be honest, I love to know people read and like my stuff, but I gave up a long time ago on trying to ‘please’ people with what I write. I write what I want to read.
 40. What do you struggle the most with in your writing?
Focus. The problem with 21 years of fandom history, is well... 21 years of fandom history. A lot of fandoms, a lot of pairings and as I say, I never really ‘leave’ a fandom, I just drop in and out and sometimes that means I’ll write on something consistently for weeks or months and then end up getting distracted by another fandom again and not touch it for weeks or months again. Hence, I don’t post WiP fics, because I know I’m easily distracted and don’t want anyone to suffer my lack of focus but me.
  Fanfiction Questions
 41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:
I don’t read WiP fics, so yeah... but 5 I’ve recently read in different fandoms that I’ve really enjoyed
 Turns Out, I Have a Rose Garden by betheflame (Steve Rogers/Tony Stark)
Lucky by china_shop (Neal Caffery/Peter Burke/Elizabeth Burke)
Colors by Quesarasara (Sherlock/John)
Betrayal by Blackghost7 (Gibbs/DiNozzo)
Matchmaker (Part 1 of the Marmalade Series) by HastaLux, Mottlemoth (Mycroft Holmes/Greg Lestrade)
 42. List and link to 5 fanfiction authors who are amazing:
See now this is hard, because... ahh so many...
 FredBassett – Primeval author, her Stephen/Ryan series is epic and brilliant and endless
https://archiveofourown.org/users/fredbassett/pseuds/fredbassett
 Keira Marcos – I know other people will have said her, I don’t care. I love all her stuff, across all the fandoms she writes in
http://keiramarcos.com/
 theapplepielifestyle – her Steve/Tony is amazing. Hands down some of the best I’ve ever read. I will fight you on this.
https://archiveofourown.org/users/theappleppielifestyle/pseuds/theappleppielifestyle
 JillyJames – her Tony DiNozzo is a real life grown up... exactly as he should be considered given he’s a goddamn federal agent!
https://jillyjames.com/
 missbecky – I’ve read pretty much all her Steve/Tony and Harry/Eggsy and it’s awesome.
https://archiveofourown.org/users/missbecky
 Honestly, I could have listed so many more, but, I’m being good!
 43. Is there anyone in your fandom who really inspires you?
Everyone. The thing is, fandom at it’s best is like crack, the more you get, the more you want. The writing, the gifs, the art... it feeds you and makes you want to make more of it, because more of it needs to exist and if that means you need to do it yourself, so be it!
 44. What ship do you feel needs more attention?
ALL OF THEM!
 45. What is your all time favourite fanfic?
Oh hell no, not even, I can not. It took me an hour to narrow down 5 authors, I can not narrow down one fanfic!
 46. If someone was to read one of your fanfics, which fic would you recommend to them and why?
I mean, it depends on what they like... probably the Hour of Separation I mentioned above, if they like the fandom/pairing, or my Animal Instinct stuff.
 47. Archive Of Our Own, Fanfiction.net or Tumblr - where do you prefer to post and why?
Archive of our Own. I haven’t touched ff.net in *years* since they started getting super restrictive about what you could post. I do occasionally post stuff to tumblr, but mostly I now post to AO3. I did have my own site and I’ve yet to upload a lot of stuff to AO3 – one of these... months... that will be a project – but it’s amazing. Seriously, having been in fandom 20+ years, going from having to search all over a million different places and now it’s all in one place, where we’re honestly, spoiled and protected. The kids now have no idea how crazy impossible that once seemed.
 48. Do you leave reviews when you read fanfiction? Why/Why not?
Yes, but not as often as I should. I love AO3s kudos button, so I can sort of say ‘hey I enjoyed this’ without having to comment, because I sort of hate leaving comments just going ‘hey I enjoyed this’ because I always feel like I should say more, like, oh I enjoyed this specific thing, which yes is an unnecessary hang-up, but there ya go.
 49. Do you care if people comment/reblog your writing? Why/why not?
Of course it’s nice to get comments, kudos, reblogs etc. I’m not as attached to them now as I was when I was younger, because I learned along the way that it was more important that I like what I’m writing than that other people do, but it’s still nice to know that something I’ve created is enjoyed.
 50. How did you get into reading and/or writing fanfiction?
I went looking for Star Trek Voyager stuff online, pics etc, waaaaaaay back when! And I came across fanfiction entirely by accident... and I read some – het stuff mostly, then I started watching Stargate SG-1, went looking for fanfiction for that, but was not on board with Jack/Sam, found Jack/Daniel went ‘huh really? That’s weird’ read it... and yeah... 21 years later... lol!
 51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!
Ship Wars. No seriously, just don’t. Like, who the actual fuck cares. I like my ship, you like your ship. I don’t care if it’s canon or not. I don’t care if it’s popular or not. I don’t read my NoTPs, but I’d never dream of telling someone else not too. Yes I think they are terrible, bad, no good pairings, but that’s *my* opinion. Don’t try to change my mind and I won’t try to change yours. I avoid them like the actual plague. If someone starts that shit around me, I will shut it right down. You are a dick. Go to Jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect £200.
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secondfromtheright · 4 years ago
Text
Fandom Racism
I’m not active on social media. But though I don’t use it, I do have this. I’m a terrible, unreliable tumblr user and I apologise for that (it took me way too many password tries to get back on here). I’d rather have been able to post something on my AO3 to any and all of my readers but my option is here instead.
I’m not a good person for this message – I am white, and I am not American. Seek black voices on this subject, please. I’m not tagging this because it’s really just aimed to anybody who already may still follow me on here. To use, but not overstep my lone social media platform. Because I can’t say nothing. I just can’t. You’ve all been so supportive and lovely to me in response to my fics and I’d like to think you’re all as decent in life to understand there are many things that we as white people do not and cannot understand regarding racism and that we need to do better.
So, this is aimed directly to my fandom readers – white fandom readers. From a white fandom writer. Some racism in fandom that I’m aware of, and I implore you all to become aware of too, if you aren’t already.
And again, please research black and brown voices on this matter. Voices that can speak to this so much more than mine, that can give better understanding, that can correct where I’m wrong, that can fill in what I’ve missed, that can communicate pain and hurt that I cannot know.
I get ‘ship and let ship’ and all, but there are major, glaring red flags that scream both personal and structural racism, conscious and unconscious, in fandom and ship conversation that should make you stop arguing, sit up and think about the shit you’re saying or reading.
This goes ten-fold for any fandom you are involved in that has a black love interest in canon that your ship and/or your fandom dismisses.
“They don’t have chemistry.”
Old ass racist trope that is about erasing romantic roles of people of colour. It perpetuates the idea that POC are not loveable, or desirable, especially to white people and especially in relationships (rather than just sex).
Anything that talks of black male characters as “evil” or “creepy” or “untrustworthy” or “weird” or “intimidating” or “aggressive” or “there’s just something I don’t like.”
It is continuing the 400+ year old bullshit premise that black men are dangerous – the ultimate justifying-white-fear-excuse to target and kill black man, then and now, because ‘they were a threat’.
When most of the ship verses ship debate is talk of tearing down a character of colour.
If someone is so confident in their white ship, why the need to tear down and hate another character? Keep it to your ship and only your ship. If the COC is a canonical love interest, especially one that existed before you started shipping your ship, question yourself and/or those shipping.
 Black female characters criticised as “irrational” or “angry” or “manly” or “slut.” Or, consistently praised only as “badass” or “fierce” or “strong” or “sassy.”
These are all major examples of misogynoir tropes that strip black women of their humanity, boxing them into one of numerous roles that do not allow them to be multifaceted, feeling people.
 ANY negative shit about black hair, especially natural, and especially of black female characters. 
Just fucking don’t. Don’t say it, don’t encourage it, seriously side-eye anyone doing it. Whites have no idea what that experience is, nor the effects of generations of products that only appeal to white consumerism and define whiteness as the definition of ‘beauty’. It a low, racist belittling of someone.
 When a character of colour has an insulting nickname within a fandom.
It dehumanises them. Actively and purposely. That simple. If you’ve never been involved or really aware of BLM protests or movement before, you must at least now recognise the chants of “Say their name.” Someone’s name matters, especially with history of slavery. Do not remove a black character’s name because you feel they threaten your ship. It reinforces white supremacy in even the most basic of society.
Any kind of discussion or mention that hopes for or encourages violence and hurt against black characters, including rooting for their death. Especially anything with a group, anything that involves dogs, anything that involves white people in power.
It’s the history of racism, it is about maintaining a white supremacist society and it retraumatises black audiences.
 If you or a fandom member have multiple ships but not a one of them includes someone of colour.
Question that shit. Seriously. If there’s a banner on a tumblr or a YouTube with loads of videos that has a bunch of only white characters, ask yourself why. What are you watching? What are you reading? Are there leading black and brown characters, black and brown voices, in what you’re consuming?
Don’t let yourself fall into thinking white people get to decide the definition of racism. Don’t let yourself think you know everything, even if you know the full dysfunctional and dramatic history of your fandom.
Understand that words and phrasing used has a whole history, and context. All of it. Microaggressions, tropes, coded language, connotations, dog whistles. Understand that just because you may not have known the history, it is no less relevant, or prevalent in the real lives of people of colour. More so, the fact that you can go about your life ignorant to it is evidence of your – our – privilege. And on this one I’ll add, especially if you’re not American. Learn real history – both American and your own country’s part in racism and slavery. Fandoms are global – recognise who you are interacting with.
Fandoms are tricky, often toxic as shit on a multiple fronts, I get it. Not everything within fandoms with characters of colour is simplistically only about race, but a lot of it is and none of us live in a vacuum. Don’t act like we do. Everything we say and do has a whole load of history and context behind it and we don’t get to cherry-pick.
If you say (or want to say) any response to the noted conversational points that sounds like
“So I can’t have an opinion now?” “I’m not racist but…” “I know black people and they said something else.” “I don’t care about/see skin colour.” “I didn’t say anything about race.” “Why are you bringing race into it?” “It’s just hating white people.” “That’s just how the character is written.”
Stop.
And seriously challenge yourself to be better, to listen more, to question and learn the origins and hurt behind such phrasing and what you may really be putting out, even if you didn’t realise it.
Because all that instinct that makes you want to push back, that has you wanting to dismiss the criticism and shut down a conversation that makes you uncomfortable and drives you to defend yourself – that is your privilege screaming because suddenly you are not the centre of everything. White discomfort. You have to recognise that instinct, and move past it. It takes continuous work. You don’t have to be perfect on racial understanding overnight – and please don’t get so terrified at such a prospect to the point of closing up and shutting down and doing nothing – but we do all need understand more and do more than we currently think we do and are.
I’m not trying to shame people, or even guilt people (not yet, anyway). But as a white person, you – we – need to start taking more responsibility for what we involve ourselves in, and what we don’t stand against.
I don’t care how good you believe you are (and maybe you are) or how many people of colour are in your life. If you are a white, you have a privilege – we - have a privilege. And whether you seek it or not, whether you’re conscious of it or not, you – we – benefit from that privilege because it is embedded in every part of society that we live day to day. And we do so at the expense of black lives.
I encourage everyone to be as involved in the movement as possible, but if you can’t attend protests, if there are COVID 19 concerns, if you don’t have the resources to donate or be in physical presence, and if you are not in a position to call out your friends and family, please, for the love of god please, at least do it in fandom. It’s a social circle that as we know, can take up a lot of our lives and our interactions. Challenge your friends in fandom – challenge yourself, if any of those phrases are in a space in which you inhabit.
Learn.
It is not the responsibility of people of colour to educate whites who suddenly realise the extent of racism, or worse, that there’s structural racism at all. But you can educate yourself, and you need to. Read black and brown experiences, listen to black and brown activists and academics. Hell, even read white antiracist voices as well if that helps you understand. If numbers are better communicators for you, look at data, whether on wealth disparity, environmental disparity, health disparity, educational disparity, justice disparity. Listen, absorb, push past your white privilege instinct that makes you uncomfortable, be driven by empathy and compassion and instead learn.
Learn history, learn data, learn what a black family has to talk about that you don’t. Learn about white fear and white grievance and white comfort and white discomfort and why they cannot be placated to. Learn to understand many forms of racism, systemic and institutional, overt and casual, personal and interpersonal. Learn to understand what privilege looks in real life, from a missed job opportunity to fear of a whole community every time they leave the house. Learn the extreme examples as well as the subtle, daily embedded. Learn to recognise the tropes and language. Learn about collective grief and trauma. Learn the psychology of looting from generationally oppressed view. Learn about the generations of violence against non-violent protest. Learn their names.
And act.
As a white person, you – we – can never really understand, but we can do a lot to try to. And we can be part of changing things. And frankly, we have to be. Racism is a white people problem; one that projects onto people of colour.
And especially to those who consider themselves any kind of liberal, those who think they can recognise misogyny or ageism or homophobia and problematic behaviour elsewhere – you have to step up on racism. And you can’t stop at the examples of obvious lack of humanity that are impossible to miss - go deeper.
And I’m asking you to not dismiss any racist language and behaviour within fandom on the basis of “It’s just a character, it’s not real.” Media and the depiction of black and brown lives is too often the only real relation to black and brown lives that a white someone has. It is a huge part of reinforcing white supremacy in society – it always has been.
If fans of colour in your fandom are telling you something is offensive, something is hurtful, something is racist, listen to them. Allow yourself to be challenged, uncomfortable and corrected. Because Black Lives Matter.
Black Lives Matter.
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greenwaterskeeter · 4 years ago
Link
I took fairly complete notes from an informational session held by local organizers and lawyers with relevant experience from the National Lawyers’ Guild. I learned a lot! At the beginning, it also includes some notes on how to approach going to actions regardless of outcome. Some portion of the information is Chicago-specific, but not all, and most of it translates within the US, I think. It’s at the link above, and also under the read more:
[missed first 5 minutes]
At Actions:
-wear nondescript, practical clothes. pants that allow motion: close to skin so as not to get caught. Jeans are better than sweats. Shorts are great, except that they don't protect you from sprayed chemicals. Wear pants that stay on, unless leaving them behind is something you're willing to do in a pinch (a strategy that Has Worked). Try not to have holes in clothes (they get caught on things). no jewelry, layer up. Ok to wear belts, although [presenter] doesn't like to need to wear one. Best to have as little as possible on you in case of arrest.
-if you have long hair, put it up out of your face. Hats are good: they can be taken off to change your identity if need be. Never ever wear sandals to an action. They will be lost and either way your feet are vulnerable. Wear shoes you're able to run in: shoes that tie. Broken-in tennis shoes are good. Boots, especially steel-toe boots, are very good, but only wear them to actions if you're used to wearing them (and running in them).
-Helmet: for batons and thrown objects. Bike helmets have limited usefulness bc they only take one hit. Skateboarding and skiing helmets take multiple hits. Construction helmets can work ok but don't stay on well usually. Spin is giving away helmets right now, all you have to pay is shipping.
-always bring goggles: not swimming goggles, not construction glasses. Goggles that 1. seal to keep out gases and 2. can handle high impact. Don't wear contacts either, and try to bring glasses that can break and not leave you without a pair.
-Gloves: go a size down from normal so they fit snugly. Welder's gloves are good for protection, including for picking up tear gas canisters. Any gloves are good for keeping your fingerprints to yourself.
-Multitools are useful, you never know when you'll need it. Umbrellas can be useful too.
-Backpack contains: snacks, water bottle with nozzle for washing out tear gas, gauze and bandaids, little towel (like a tea towel), extra N95 masks/respirators (which can be found at hardware stores and paint stores-- it's hard to keep moving when you can't breathe!), anything else you want.
-Tell people before actions that you're going, and make sure someone else at the action knows your full legal name and birthday so you can be gotten out more quickly in case of arrest
Social media: don't post videos or photos of yourself or others at actions, especially ones in which people are identifiable. This amounts to snitching. Don't wear logos or other identifiable clothing (see Etsy arrest and conviction). Also, don't post pictures of yourself or others NOT at actions but showing off stuff taken from cops etc.
-National Lawyers' Guild > National Bar Association
If Arrested (in Chicago):
The result of being stopped by police is only likely to result in a ticket and immediate release at actions organized with the input and approval of police: scripted demonstrations. At other actions, if they arrest you, they take you into custody and then to the station. The point is to intimidate you and your comrades. There are things you can control about the situation.
What you should do depends on what your goal is. If you want to get out asap, that's one track. If you want to make a point of being arrested, that's a different track.
Sometimes they use metal and sometimes they use plastic cuffs.
When you get to the station they'll take your address, name, and fingerprints-- these are the only demands you should grant. They are not covered by your constitutional right to refuse to answer (that only covers information that could be used as evidence to incriminate you, not information used to identify you). Speaking of: they will not read your Miranda rights right away, if at all. They only are supposed to do that right before asking incriminating questions.
Being arrested typically leads to lots of waiting. People who have been arrested more times usually get out quicker (their fingerprints are already in the system, and they can check for warrants easily). This is largely what they are making you wait for: checking to see how high to set your bond based on any warrants you may have.
They will put you in a cell and not give you food or medicine, typically. If you get food it will not be tasty, so eat right before the action and bring food with you.
If they've arrested a bunch of people at once, it might be 12-14 hours before you're released.
I-bond: they release you without you having to pay money for it. The bond consists of a promise to attend court later. The bond slip may not be legible (it should have the court date, place, and maybe the charge on it), but don't worry about that. It can be figured out.
D-bond: They make you pay to leave as a punitive measure. Still trying to intimidate you. The Chicago Bond Fund has covered all such bonds resulting from arrests at actions so far.
Don't count on getting a phone call, especially in case of mass arrest. If you get it, call a trusted person or the National Lawyers Guild, who can take care of getting you out. Tell whoever you call: where you are, if there is anyone with you who is injured, names of any other people you know who have been arrested.
Even though they won't offer it, if you need medical care, request it. They might tell you getting treated will make releasing you take longer or some other reason you shouldn't get treated: they are probably lying, and in any case, it's worth it to A. get the care you need, B. get it on record that they hurt you, and/or C. get it on record how long they put you off/that they refused to get you care. These records can be used in civil cases.
When you're released, they give you your stuff back that they confiscated, unless they're keeping it as evidence in charges (cellphone, shoelaces, belt. They take the laces and belt in an attempt to prevent suicide)
Would not advise taking cellphone to demonstration. Take a burner phone if you must. If you're arrested, the police will definitely take it and will try to get into it. They technically need a warrant to do that, and they may get one. In general, don't bring anything you'd be sad to lose or can't replace.
Charges: most common ones put on protestors are misdemeanors. The difference between a misdemeanor and a felony is that the maximum sentence on a misdemeanor is 364 days, and the minimum sentence on a felony is 365 days. It's very unusual as of now for a protestor to actually go to jail. The common misdemeanors applied to protestors are disorderly conduct, mob action, and destruction of property. They require different kinds of evidence but result in the same punishment. Earlier this year they charged more people with disorderly conduct, but the sentences weren't harsh enough/ too many people's charges were dismissed, so now they're charging people with mob action, since "mob" has a violent connotation.
Felonies: include theft, criminal damage to property, aggravated battery, resisting arrest. What defines felony theft and felony property damage is how much money is "lost" (more than $300 for a felony. Might have been increased to $500 or $800 recently). No matter what you do to a cop, if they are injured at all or perceive or can suggest that you tried to hurt them, that will be aggravated battery. Resisting arrest is rarely made a felony but it can be if the cop is particularly offended.
Resisting arrest carries more weight than other misdemeanors because police take everything personally. The punishment is harsher than for other misdemeanors. Technically the arrest has to be legal for resistance to count as resisting arrest. In practice, they will not respect any refusal to be arrested. The best thing to hope for if they do arrest you while you're resisting is that you'll be declared innocent later due to unlawful arrest. Resisting arrest can be a lot of things: jerking away, refusing to stand up to be arrested, taking too long to stand up... They can definitely charge you with resisting when you're not resisting. If you are resisting (by the legal definition), you'll know you are because you'll be doing it on purpose. If they order you to move and then push you and you fall over, that can't lawfully be considered resisting, but it has.
Grand juries: have been called for actions around [George] Floyd. Whatever they may once have been, they are now used to repress and that's about it. The city can't call one, but the feds and state can. Technically, must be composed of fellow citizens called to evaluate evidence for felony charges. In practice, the people they put together listen to the state's attorney, who tells them what to do. If you're subpoenaed to a grand jury, they're not trying to get you personally (or at least not only trying to get you personally), they're after information. They want you to give people up. Police want to know who's organizing. Compliance is snitching. No matter how clever you are, trying to act compliant but keep information back, if you answer at all they will get more information out of you than you want them to have.
If you do comply, they'll get what they can out of you. If you refuse, they can charge you with contempt and imprison you up to the length of the grand jury or 18 months (or until you snitch). They can charge you with either civil or criminal contempt.
Information security: Police put a lot of effort into tracking data. They also make attempts to infiltrate and get informants. Sensitive information can't be said over the phone or texted, not even on Signal. Meet in person to plan.
Nothing you say to police will help. They are only looking for evidence against you, and will do everything they can to use what you say as evidence. There have been many cases of people thinking they can explain and show that they're innocent, only to have their own words used as the evidence that puts them in prison.
When they confiscate your things, police can also confiscate any protective gear (and of course weapons) you have as evidence that you came to start a fight. (they did this at Standing Rock).
When police give you an order to leave, they lawfully must 1. give an order to disperse 2. that everyone can hear and then 3. wait a reasonable amount of time for you to follow the order. If you don't have the ability to leave, they legally cannot arrest you. This doesn't mean they won't.
While filing a complaint against police with COPA is an option that gives lawyers evidence they can use in your favor, there are problems. 1. it will ensure that your charges won't be dropped, because police take these claims personally and 2. COPA requires people who file complaints to come and give evidence under oath (which they will make you do under unfavorable conditions and mess you up). Don't file a complaint with COPA in criminal cases, they will use it against you. Don't do it for civil cases except for very specific circumstances, since they will try to use it against you there too.
If you are not a citizen / do not have a green card, being arrested can be a longer-term problem even if they don't charge you. There are ways around it (ask an immigration attorney).
If you have a previous misdemeanor or arrest, this will not increase your chances of being arrested again, since they almost certainly won't recognize you. It won't increase your chances of being charged again either, since they decide whether or not to charge you before they look up your record. However, once they do look up your record, it may increase the chances of them deciding to increase your charge from civil to criminal.
Typically, they will put more charges on you the more you do to get away (if you are not successful or they get your identity). Any struggling will likely be construed as "aggravated battery on a police officer" (a felony). Attempts at dearrest, when not successful, are charged as aggravated battery on a police officer. For this reason, practice dearresting ahead of time, run, drill, drill, drill.
What you bring can be seized as evidence, yes, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't bring it. The point of all this is that you can go into it with your eyes open, making informed choices. Practical advice and legal advice do not always agree.
Dearrests: person initially being arrested may be charged extra if the dearrest is unsuccessful or if their identity is known/found out. Police will definitely charge them if possible, as they are easily offended.
Court: don't worry about finding or paying for representation. The National Lawyers' Guild has plenty of volunteer attorneys working pro bono representing activists. You can talk to an attorney and go over your options over zoom before court. Court is also on zoom these days. Lots of waiting involved in this. One person is known to have mown their lawn while in court over zoom.
You can refuse an attorney to go to trial; there is empowerment in this option. May be most prudent to do this only if you've been to court several times.
You can talk to the corporation [illegible] (who covers city law) or the state's attorney (covers state law) and see whether they're going ahead with your case. 1/2 of cases involving protestors have been thrown out so far. If they throw it out, there's nothing else you need to do to prevent being convicted.
You can request discovery (access to evidence) which will tell you how likely you are to win. It will also tell you how bad police records are. Another thing that can make you more likely to win is if a different cop arrested you than wrote the report about it.
There's no one right answer to how to approach this, whether to prioritize getting it over with or making a point. That depends on your goals. If you're going for quick, that will usually involve a plea deal. They may assign you 3 months to a year of "supervision." This means that if you don't make trouble in that time (specifically, if you're not convicted of breaking the law in that time), they'll clear the present conviction from your record in 2 years.
State cases are supposed to prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt. Smaller cases can be decided by "a preponderance of evidence."
necessity defense- "I did it, but I felt that I needed to do it to prevent further harm or illegality from ocurring." This is a common defense for activists, and can be a good strategy.
Even if your case is thrown out, arrests stay on your record unless expunged. If your case is thrown out, if you undergo supervision, or if you are found not guilty, you can get the arrest expunged. It's something you have to do on your own initiative. Cabrini Green Legal Aid will help you do this for free. It's easy, it's a form you fill out, but processing can take a year or two (backlog).
If you're arrested during a protest, you can contact the National Lawyers' Guild as soon as you can, or have someone do it for you, and they'll help you get out. hotline 773-309-1198
Before an action, if you're putting one together, you can contact the National Lawyers' Guild and they'll help with jail support (it helps to specify whether you expect arrest).
Don't use 1800 law rep 4 anymore
If you're arrested NOT at an action, the Cook County Public Defender hotline is 844-817-4448
They gave personal contact info for the people who presented all this information, but I'm not going to share that here. They were local organizers and lawyers from the National Lawyers' Guild (with experience defending activists and being arrested themselves).
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