#- i think gives the fact that she Is Very Much Willing To So in sdr2 and dr3 much more impact. she wasnt a day 1 ride or die.

[fryknave]

btw im not pointing out kirigiris awfulness towards naegi as a "Gotcha!" to argue that naegami is clearly the better ship or something. i obviously really Really like both. I just think that if ur able to see that togami clearly cares for naegi despite his treatment of him, u should be able to see that kirigiri similarly clearly cares for him while also acknowledging her poor treatment of him. scrubbing away her nuances to make the pairing fit into a perfect girlboss x silly malewife fandomization is not only a disservice to their characters, but takes away a lot of what makes their relationship interesting imo

[danggirlronpa]

Not the Pekoshima anon who originally talked about the ship, but I am so Invested in pekoshima my god, I have to talk about it. Okay so - with both Ultimate Despair's we see (discounting DR3 because. I don't like it), Nagito and Mikan, I find them very interesting. Mikan in chapter 3 obviously isn't behaving well - murder and all - but she also seems to recognize for possibly the first time ever that how people treated her was wrong (questioning why they treated her this way, acknowledging it wasn't fair, even calling the cast a bunch of bullies in scorn). Which is... such interesting characterization! It's one of the reasons I can't exactly buy how Junkan is presented in DR3 - in her FTEs, how people treated Mikan was normal to her, and she didn't seem to fully realize it was wrong. In the third trial, Mikan talks as if she knows how she was treated was wrong, and singles out Junko as being different, having forgiven her. In her final FTE, she says that Hajime has forgiven her too, implying to me that Junko did the same thing as Hajime did during their FTEs together, just with malicious intent (strengthening the Hajime/Izuru and Ryouko/Junko parallels and solitifying both Chiaki and Hajime in SDR2 as "the kindness the remnants never had" - kindness that ultimately leads to them triumphing over Junko this time). So in DR3, it didn't make much sense to me that Junko treated Mikan just as everyone else in Mikan's life has. Kicking her and berating her. Of course, with brainwashing she didn't need to be kind, but before DR3 came out, I always thought Junko operated more like... she would make you go one step forward, and two steps back. She would present herself as if solving your problems and helping you, but that was just to her own ends. We see this in Nagito too - when he's in DR:AE as a remnant of despair, his ideals have changed drastically from SDR2, and I'd go so far as to say what he preaches in DR:AE to be a better philosophy - though how far he's willing to go for it, still bad. So, the conclusion I reached was that every remnant would have some sort of ironic twist - something they improved upon, only for their other behaviors to be worse, like Nagito and Mikan.

So Hiyoko wouldn't be bully - but maybe it would be too much in the other direction, where she was obedient to a fault. Never talking without permission, sitting still like a doll, only doing what she was told.

Kaizuchi, perhaps, would no longer be obsessed with Sonia, someone who didn't like him back, and instead fixate on Junko, who welcomed his obsession...

And Peko, who used to think she was a tool... perhaps she would finally realize she was human. Perhaps she would realize this, and despair at such a fact.

Because it would mean she failed. She failed to become a tool for Fuyuhiko, and suddenly everything done to her wasn't "training a tool" but a tragedy. Her life was a tragedy. The very fact that she is human is despair, but that despair itself proves she is human. I imagine she could get very twisty and turny in her thoughts about this.

I also have the headcanon that Peko and Fuyuhiko during the despair times switches roles. Fuyuhiko always took on too much responsibility, and hey, here's your old pal Junko here to set you straight! You don't need to take so much onto yourself! It's painful, isn't it? Taking the burden of making choices. Being human. Who wants that responsibility? Why not give it to someone else? Oh hey, look at that, it's your old pal Peko! She'll take the brunt of responsibility from now on! From now on, Peko is the master and Fuyuhiko is the tool!

I just love the idea of Junko doing these ironic little twists. Helping them in some way only to fuck them over in others. Junko makes Peko realize she's human, and because of that, Peko cannot help but both love and resent her. Real toxic yuri shit going on.

(TW this gets a lil gory at the end)

This is a really good take on Junko's strategy!! My Junko analysis is similar but not quite the same. I've always viewed Junko as a monkey's paw. Whoever you are, she gives you exactly what you want, in its totality - but at the expense of your happiness.

Mikan's desire for someone to care for her becomes excessive dependency and blind devotion. Ryota's desire to become a successful animator who doesn't have to think about talking to others or existing in the real world becomes the complete destruction of that world, and his animated work as the most influential to ever exist. Nagito's desire to become a force which others can step on to find hope becomes Nagito ensuring the legacy of the greatest despair he possibly can, so that no 'fake' hopes can bypass his rigorous test - only a True Ultimate Hope can overcome and finally lead the world to victory.

Despair - for Junko - is the knowledge that you have succeeded, and everything is even worse than if you hadn't. Because Junko is Always succeeding, and she's Always in despair. Nothing challenges her. The only thing that she can't predict is pure dumb luck, which Makoto leverages against her both in THH and SDR2 to enable her defeat. Junko, like Izuru, is one of the most successful people to ever exist, and it SUCKS. So of course she is dragging people down the exact same way she herself is dragged down. Of course she shows people obvious, glowing success, in such a way that it tears down the entire world they once knew. Because this way - if one day unimaginably, they break their bonds - they will never, ever experience true hope again. Because their hopes are what destroyed them. Their hope brings about despair.

So from that perspective, I think you're dead on the money with Fuyuhiko, who loathes his position and wants to be free of the burden of responsibility (wouldn't it be easier, to be a tool, too? Aren't you tired of telling people to die? Shouldn't you take responsibility yourself, if there's killing to be done?). But Peko's desire is to be a tool. Rather than teaching Peko how to become her own person, I personally think that Junko would put Peko through the paces of both physical and psychological torture to turn her into a complete unfeeling instrument, exactly like Peko wanted. Once you've been in a 1-foot cell with no other people for a week, once you've been given Pavlovian training to receive an endorphin rush when holding your own spilling viscera in your hands - affection, agency, memory all fade away. There's just the next order. Exactly like Peko wanted.

[multiplefandomsblog]

Mikan x Reader x Nagito SFW and NSFW hcs

request; Mikan x Reader x Nagito SFW and NSFW hcs, please!

warnings; fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, TW!!! Syringes and needles, NSFW, panty-gagging, bondage, minor blood play, fear play, knife play, kinda yandere territory?? Idk, just kinda dark content, taboo, reader has gender-neutral parts and pronouns\pet names, cussing, riding, thigh riding, minor dacryphillia, kinda all over the place

note; sorry it took so long! I had to play a bit sdr2 to get a better idea of Mikan’s character lmaoo- also, I feel like I focused more on Mikan rather than Nagito, and for that, I’m sorry T_T It’s just that, I had already written a Nagito NSFW hcs, so I didn’t have much to write? But don’t worry, I still wrote a lot for him, just not as much as Mikans. Hope you enjoy <3

≈SFW≈

◊ A relationship with the two would be kinda high-maintenance. Seeing as how they are both self-deprecating, you’d have to constantly take care of them and angrily love them until they get the fact that you love them no matter what, into their thick-skulls.

◊ I think if Mikan ever said something self-deprecating about herself, Nagito would immediately shut those thoughts down, praising her about how radiant she and her hope is. Throwing in some, “How could you say that about yourself? You’re exceedingly hopeful and remarkably generous to be with someone such as me.” ––And now it was Mikan’s turn to shut his thoughts down, “But N-Nagito, you and S/o are the ones w-who are so nice and generous to me! Uuaaa! I-I’m sorry to have made you say such things..! I s-should’ve kept my mouth shut!” It’d kind of go back and forth like a ping pong ball of shitty self-esteem.

◊ Nagito is always shocked whenever anyone of you say self-deprecating things, you always catch him off guard. He still finds it unbelievable how people as talented as you two, say such terrible things about yourselves. He goes on a whole hope rant until your heads hurt, successfully emptying out your mind of self-loathing things and filling it with fucking pain. 

◊ If someone ever decided to pick on Nagito, he wouldn’t care, he’s convinced he deserves it. But when he sees someone picking on his hopes? Bitch what?

◊ He’s actually pretty protective of the two of you, he takes offence himself when he sees someone bringing down his hopes, something he worships. How dare they? Especially since he knows how sensitive Mikan is, he gets reasonably heated. Even so, you won’t catch Nagito being very obviously angry, his poker face is surprisingly effective. Unfortunately, Nagito’s face is too cute effective to seem threatening. It’s almost always his words that send the oppressor sprinting for their life, never his grim expression.

◊ Remember, Nagito is willing to do anything to preserve hope, anything. Leading to him muttering shit like, “The perfect sacrifice!” and, “Well hey! At least you won’t be dying for despair, you’ll be dying for hope!” 

◊ Something I feel like Nagito never forgets to do, is to say common greetings, and phrases, like; “Good morning!” or, “Dinner’s ready!” He doesn’t know why, but it always makes him feel really happy when he says that; it's like, a way to prolong the normality of his life with you two in it. Of course, being the boyfriend of two extremely talented people, and being the ultimate lucky student himself definitely doesn't guarantee normal, he still likes to think and act like the life he's living is just a little bit normal.

◊ He does all these things mostly because he wants to make you both happy, he wants that gratification that he’s doing alright. So give the man some well-deserved praises, he’ll flush and kiss you in thanks, despite not being 100% convinced. 

◊ It makes Nagito really happy whenever the two of you tell him you love him. However, if either of you had trouble saying ‘I love you’, he wouldn’t be too bothered. He may love receiving praise from the both of you, but he loves giving it more.

◊ I head-canon Nagito love doing domestic things. Although he doesn’t want to admit it, he craves a normal life, a life without any ultimate talents that he has to worry about. Doing domestic things makes him feel human, more relaxed, letting him forget about the danger that always seems to follow him.

◊ Nagito would be happy cleaning anything! Even blood :D! 

◊ Mikan is always worried about disappointing you both. The pedestal that Nagito puts her on, kind of freaks her out because she feels as if she has to be perfect for him. So please, please, please reassure her that she’ll always be perfect for the both of you, no matter what she does; it couldn’t change anything.

◊ Mikan can’t really relax at all, she’s constantly overthinking about what she wants to say without it seeming offensive and freaking out terribly when she slips up. So I think that when she sleeps, it’s the most precious thing ever. She overworks herself a lot by doing hospital work, sometimes torturing herself by staying up to go over all the guilt and embarrassment she experienced during the day. 

◊ So when Mikan finally falls asleep, she sleeps like a rock. She only ever gets sleep when her body physically cannot handle it anymore, despite the things she says about having good sleeping habits, she seems to believe it only applies to you two. 

◊ I head-canon that Mikan doesn’t like getting touched suddenly, so before she passes out from exhaustion, make sure you warn her before cuddling her. She’ll probably just mutter out something incoherent, but it’s good to ask.

◊ You and Nagito both aw over how adorable she looks as she sleeps, she looked so soft and peaceful, not a single trace of worry on her delicate features. 

◊ Cuddling with Mikan and Nagito would be a dream. Mikan is extremely warm, almost like a human heat pad. Nagito is always cold, his feet and hands that brush against your skin and hers always make you both shiver. Even so, the mix of temperatures are surprisingly pleasant. 

◊ During winter, Nagito would cling to the both of you for dear life, his naturally cold skin combined with the weather feeling like death. 

◊ Eventually, Nagito would get sick and Mikan would have to take care of him. You and Mikan both teamed up to nurse Nagito back to health. Mikan doing most of the professional stuff and you sterilizing her tools and getting her stuff.

◊ Mikan becomes noticeably more confident and assertive when she’s in the ‘nurse zone’, and to be honest, it was kind of hot. Watch as you tell her that, and her whole stern attitude dissolves as her cheeks turn as red as Nagito’s sickly red cheeks. Ugh it’s adorable

◊ Mikan is really happy being in a relationship with the both of you, as she constantly has this fear of being hated and unwanted, being with the two of you and having you both show affection to her on a daily basis, makes her feel overjoyed. Yet, she still has a big fear of messing up with you both and screwing up her entire relationship with you two. 

◊ Even though you reassure her all the time that you’re not with her because you pity her, she still has that thought gnawing at the back of her head at times. Coming back to torment her as you tell her you love her. Even so, she couldn’t care less if your love sprouted from something worse, she believes she should be thankful for even the slightest attention you give her.

(random head-canon)

◊ So we all know Mikan’s(almost disturbing so) obsession with syringes, right? So to satisfy her urge for using syringes, you and Nagito had a plan that you thought she would love(you mostly did this so she would stop asking if you wanted shots-). Recently, Nagito had been taking some baking classes in secret and he had learned about this thing where people would inject stuff inside buns and pastries. Like, custard, chocolate filling, etc. And he immediately thought of the syringe-crazed Mikan he and you both shared a mutual love for.

◊ So now you’ve all created a tradition where whenever Mikan is feeling down or craving the way the needle sinks into human skin, you and Nagito would bake together and make the custard and everything, whipping out the food syringes for Mikan to play with. When she first caught sight of the syringes, she was a bit confused, “T-there are shots f-for… bread?” After giggling at her confusion, you explained what the technique was, Nagito demonstrating as you explained. After watching him swiftly push the filling inside the plump bun, she instantly felt the need to try it! 

◊ She tried her best not to seem too eager, not wanting to scare you or creep you away. Ultimately, her efforts were wasted as you saw her giddy smile and bounce in her step as she copied Nagito’s movements. 

◊ The first few times were a fail, as a result of Mikan feeling really bad for messing it up. Though before she could apologize, you quickly shoved a bun in her mouth. “MmpH??”

◊ Very delicious! aaand very effective for shutting up self-deprecating boyfriends and girlfriends.

≈NSFW≈

◊ I head-canon for both Nagito and Mikan to be into fear play. Mikan enjoys giving fear play, and Nagito enjoys receiving it so it works out perfectly!

◊ Though I bet this isn’t a popular opinion, I think Mikan is secretly a dom.

◊ During the foreplay, she’d act all subby, letting you bite at her neck and letting out cute moans, fooling you both completely. Her subby personality was just a ruse, you soon learned after she started pinning you down. As things get more heated, Nagito finds himself tied and you find yourself, gagged by her own panties.

◊ Mikan kind of loses it a bit during sex, so you’d have to remind her occasionally not to get too rough because once she’s in her dom headspace, she forgets everything except for the fact she has two perfect subs for her. 

◊ ^^ In all honesty, you’d have to be in a relationship with Mikan for a long time for her to finally reveal that side of herself to the both of you.

◊ Small parts of her sadistic side would show, but you would brush it off as her being bratty. Clearly, that was not the case.

◊ Mikan enjoys sex because sometimes she feels as if that’s the only time she can be comfortable enough to truly be herself and not overthink if you didn’t like her or her kinky side. 

◊ Nagito is kind of like, the perfect pet for Mikan, he’s always aiming to praise and please you both, and so she thought he was the perfect little cumdump for her. 

◊ Mikan and Nagito are definitely more on the giving side, with the rare occasions where Mikan would want you to pleasure her instead. 

◊ She is very demanding when she wants you to make her feel good, unlike her usual self. It gives Nagito and you whiplash, but it also gives you a rush of anticipation. You both are basically her loyal pets that she can do whatever she wishes with, whatever it is, it’s all up to her. So you’re both just eagerly waiting for her next instructions, despite knowing that whatever she says, you won’t be able to deny. You both completely submit to her, and she loves it. 

◊ If she felt like you both needed a punishment, she would have you ride her thigh, each of you humping one of her legs desperately to get off, chanting her name like a fucking prayer. She’d gently caress both of your heads as you both grunted and whimpered from her muscle bouncing against the parts where you needed it most.

◊ She definitely has a mistress and/or mommy kink, for sure. She loves the power trip.

◊ Seriously though, imagine both Nagito and Mikan sucking at any parts of your skin they come in contact with. They wouldn’t let you breathe for one second, overstimulating and fucking you until you see stars. Your body would be writhing and twitching from the overwhelming amount of pleasure you received from the two, you felt as if they were teaming up on you and giving you a double combo kick to your genitals-

◊ Mikan would be straddling your upper torso with her thighs, Nagito going down on you behind her. He’d wrap your legs around his head, letting you pull his head closer to you with your legs. Mikan would be grinding against your stomach, her back arched as she leaned down to nip at the skin of your neck, holding your arms above your head with one hand, a small knife in the other. You craned your neck away from the knife she held against your throat, moaning weakly as she pressed the blade against your skin slightly. 

◊ Your eyes glossed over as you tried not to flinch away from Nagito’s mouth that was overstimulating you–quite intensely, might I add–, yet your efforts were futile as you ended up arching your back suddenly, accidentally pressing your skin on the blade as a result of the fervour from the third orgasm Nagito had given you. Mikan’s sadistic giggles filled the room as you whimpered at the burning feeling on your neck, her leaning down to lick your small wound clean. 

◊ “You know darling, I could just slit your throat at any time, any time at all.” The intense way Mikan stared at you sent shivers down your spine, “I have complete control, you don’t have a choice in this matter.” Gliding the tip of her knife down the middle of your chest, almost as if she was planning to carve you open. “Isn’t that amazing?”

◊ Nagito loves fear play, he entrusts his life entirely to the both of you, so just the rush of knowing your most loved and trusted ones could kill you at any moment, gets him off in a twisted way. 

◊ If Mikan ever held a knife over his abdomen or throat, he’d go crazy, He’d buck his hips into your hips that rode him, as he whined and begged for Mikan. He didn’t even know exactly what he wanted, he was just babbling nonsense. His moans get louder the more Mikan presses her knife against his skin, she would have to choke him to shut him up. 

◊ While Mikan played with the knife and his life, she would have you bounce on his dick despite his dick being flaccid, and you being overstimulated. It didn’t matter if it fucking hurt, you will take it, there’s no argument. 

◊ Nagito gets off on that euphoric rush of adrenaline caused by the tip of the knife digging into his chest, he can’t get enough of it. Moans mixed in with borderline psychotic laughs as he felt his body instinctually twitch away from the cold blade. Mikan would lightly slap his face, a punishment for flinching away from her, “You can take it like a good boy, right? I know you can. Because you’re just a little pet aaaall for me, yeah?” Nagito laughed out several affirmations, bucking his hips up into your overstimulated hole from pure animal instinct. 

◊ You nearly screamed from the pressure of his up against your sweet spot, eyes widening from fear at Mikan’s head slowly turning around to look at you. Nagito let out a sigh of relief he didn’t know he was holding when Mikan changed targets, letting Nagito take a small breather before she probably destroys that cute little ass of his.    

◊ “So cute~ Ah, Is darling crying?” She spoke in a faux-innocent tone, tilting her head at your submissive nature. “I-it’s a-a lot!” You sniffled, whimpering at her predatory gaze, “Love,” Her sadistic grin making you flinch, “I don’t care.”

◊ For aftercare, it’d take some time for Mikan to recover from her headspace. So you better enjoy it while you can, because clingy confident Mikan is a treat! She’ll nuzzle herself into your arms and Nagito’s, holding one arm from each of you. “My darlings look so fucked out, so beautiful, I wish I could see you both like this forever.” Her tone of voice was soft, she spoke almost as if she was reading a bedtime story to both of you.

◊ Once she does snap out of it, she gets scarily silent and red for a few minutes. Trying not to think about and drool from the images and noises you both had made, that she had imprinted in her memory permanently. 

◊ If she ever left you with small cuts after sex, she’d always treat them before you went to bed. She doesn’t want them to get infected the next day! 

◊ To be honest, after seeing the rough fingerprints, hickeys, and cuts on your bodies, she doesn’t even feel an ounce of guilt or regret. She enjoyed every second of that moment, it’s something that won’t leave her mind until the next time you all do this again.

[danganronpa2]

honestly i feel like dr3 absolutely massacred kamukura like junko says in sdr2 "i simply broke his spirit" which implies not only that he had a spirit to break but that he was incredibly strong willed, seeing as her immediate reaction to reborn hinata is "kamukura??????"

i feel dr3 made a very big mistake in portraying kamukura as someone who was already bored with the world considering he was kept in a small, dark room that according to dr0 was more like a prison cell, kept secret from the outside world. i don't think kamukura was bored with the world yet, i think he was bored of the box he'd been trapped inside. i think it would have been a far better move to show that he was insatiably curious and very sheltered and was in fact a victim as kamishiro theorises he is in dr0, having him want to see the world and junko handing it to him, positioning herself as his saviour and giving him hope for the very first time, only to snatch it away immediately and leave him broken and resentful towards him for taking advantage of him, framing him for mass murder, and forcing him to go on the run. he'd been raised to believe he was above being used like that, but she played him like a fiddle and drank up his despair with a straw

i think in dr3 he's very, very flat, and considering he's characterised far more interestingly in utdp and drs the anime was just exceedingly disappointing

DUDE YEAH OKAY THAT IS SO TRUE also @nekonekoluv 's tags too, you guys made some really good points. i never even considered the thing about junko's reaction to hinata in the final trial omg that's genius

i guess it's less that i really liked his characterization in dr3 and more that it was a LOT less bad than i was expecting it to be, since he has like... 30 lines in the actual game or something. it would have been amazing if we could see what he was like right after the procedure and before meeting junko, since he obviously IS capable of feeling emotions like curiosity and anger, and junko's impact on him is really heartbreakingly cruel. i do really hate that they stated his motivation to be "i wanted to see the outcome of hope vs despair" or whatever when it's pretty clear in the boat scene that he's driven by resentment and a desire for revenge. plus, my own personal theory is that he knew there was a chance his own existence as izuru kamukura could be overwritten during the simulation, so it was a little bit of a self-destructive impulse too.

...amazing how the stupid board game spinoffs are so much better written than the "canon" anime lmao thank you both for the excellent kamukura opinions

[oumakokichi]

So what do you think of Kaede and Kokichi's relationship? And if Kaede remained the protagonist how do you think it would change?

Considering it’s Kaede’s birthday today I think this is a really fun question to come back to!

Kaede is an absolutely amazing character, and I love how different her relationships with the rest of the cast feel from Saihara’s. She and Ouma have an especially interesting friendship in their FTEs together (one of Kaede’s FTEs with Ouma might be one of my favorite FTEs ever, really), so I don’t mind going a little more in-depth on my thoughts about their dynamic, as well as about how that dynamic and the story itself might’ve changed if Kaede had remained the protagonist!

Warning for spoilers as always, though I’m pretty sure most people know about the chapter 1 twist by now.

I think one of my absolute favorite things about Kaede is just how easy it is to get attached to her in such a short amount of time. She’s only around for the prologue and a single chapter, but despite that (or rather, because of the sheer length of the chapters in ndrv3, which tend to be much longer than dr1 or sdr2’s chapters), we still get to see so many different sides of her and just how complex of a character she really is. And I think that’s largely the reason for her continued popularity to this day: Kaede might not stay around for long, but we still really feel like we know her by the end of it.

And really, I think that’s pretty similar to how the actual characters feel about Kaede themselves. Despite how short her time is with all of them, she leaves such a powerful, lasting impression, even after her death. This is a pretty big change from previous DR games, where the chapter 1 culprits especially tend to suffer a pretty big lack of relevance or relationship to other characters in later chapters. Often times the victims are at least somewhat memorable (Maizono and the Impostor both at least come up a few times in their respective games), but characters like Leon or Teruteru just don’t feel like they have much of an impact on the other characters or the plot itself after their trials are finished.

This is totally different from Kaede, whose positive outlook and outgoing attitude already makes her fairly likable to most of the others, but who also openly invites the others to rely on her once she establishes herself as a leader figure fairly quickly in chapter 1. Most of the other characters latch onto her almost immediately, either because she seems so reliable and helpful (Saihara and Tenko in particular seem to like this about her), or because they can’t help but respect her and what she’s trying to do for the group (characters like Momota, who really values group cooperation, come to mind).

Personally, I think Ouma fell into the latter category. He and Kaede have something of a complicated relationship almost right from the get-go in chapter 1, but it’s still pretty clear that Ouma did respect Kaede a lot and recognized that she had the group’s best interests at heart, even if he didn’t always agree with her methods.

Likewise, I think Kaede was somewhat curious about Ouma and really wanted to get along with him, despite how difficult he could be. We see in Ouma’s introduction, both in the demo and the actual game, that Kaede clearly recognizes on some level that part of his annoying attitude is really just his way of teasing others, and that he doesn’t seem particularly malicious. More specifically, she describes him as “having a childish streak that makes him hard to hate,” which is a pretty spot-on description of Ouma in a nutshell. In short, she knew he was annoying and childish (on purpose, most of the time) but she definitely didn’t think of him as evil or cruel. This may in part also be because she didn’t live long enough to see him embrace the fake villain routine by the end of chapter 4, of course.

Ouma has a few teasing remarks throughout most of the game, but it’s not really until the death road of despair is discovered that he and Kaede butt heads for the very first time. This is because of a big, fundamental difference between their ideologies: while both of them very much have the group’s best interests at heart, they completely disagree when it comes to whether it’s worth it to cooperate as a team or not.

By the end of the game, Ouma is extremely paranoid, refusing to cooperate with absolutely anyone unless it’s out of some mixture of chance and necessity (such as working with Momota in chapter 5). He keeps all his cards close to the chest, and refuses to confide in or trust any of his remaining classmates, believing it’s fully possible any of them could be the ringleader.

But before the events of chapter 4, we see that he’s actually not opposed to the idea of selective cooperation. He strikes up a tentative collaboration with Miu early on, commissioning her to create some extremely useful inventions with the intent of using them to try and end the killing game. He also extends an invitation of cooperation to both Kaede (in one of her FTEs) and Saihara (in chapter 4, in the parlor of the VR world), though he goes about this in such a sly, underhanded, and off-putting way that both of them shoot his offer down flat. Even he’s not beyond the idea of teaming up with people he perceives as “useful” or “smart,” as long as it’s a much smaller, one-on-one effort rather than trusting or working with the entire group.

By contrast, Kaede is someone who believes that group unity is almost a necessity if they want to escape the killing game. This is very much in line with the role she establishes for herself as a leader. Unlike characters like Momota, who has always sort of longed to embrace a “hero” role, or Saihara, who is considerably more awkward and unwilling to be a leader because of how guilty he feels, Kaede’s role is much more about boosting and maintaining the group’s morale.

This is lampshaded several times by the classical music pieces that she references, often in an attempt to either clam the others down or fire them up at the idea of working together and escaping. It’s also a fantastic little clue that her own positive outlook is something a bit more crafted than it seems on the surface; she always tries to be optimistic about things and face her problems head-on, but that’s in large part because she tries to energize herself and present that reliable, dependable persona to the rest of the group. In short, she believes that if she reveals her own uncertainty or lack of faith in her plans, the rest of the group’s trust and morale will fall too.

Like I mentioned, this difference in their outlook is really what begins to cause problems for them once they discover the death road of despair in chapter 1. Kaede sees the tunnel as their one opportunity to escape without having to rely on the killing game itself; even if it’s extremely difficult and damn near impossible to get through it, the chance of injury is a risk she’s willing to take, no matter how many times they have to start over. But Ouma disagrees with this mindset and criticizes her in front of the entire group, pointing out how everyone else is already exhausted and even injured, and saying that she has no right to make that decision for the rest of them.

He even goes a step further and accuses her of strong-arming the rest of them by “denying them the right to give up in an impossible situation.” He claims that by positing herself as an inspirational figure, she has the “moral high-ground” no matter what the rest of them do or say, and clearly doesn’t think it’s possible for them to continue down the death road without someone getting seriously injured, or worse.

These harsh words really take Kaede aback, especially since most of the rest of the group seems to more or less agree with Ouma. She’s extremely hurt—not just by the fact that no one seems to really want to keep going with her plan, but also, I think, because she felt as if Ouma was right on some level. In my opinion, this is why she cries once she’s alone in her room later: because she did feel as though she’d forced everyone else to go along with an unreasonable plan. It’s the first time that we really see the cracks in her leader persona beginning to show, as well as the self-doubt that she carries.

I honestly think many people who dislike Ouma on their first playthrough of the game may have started here, right at this moment. Because so much of this seems to be fairly black-or-white initially—Kaede is presented as the unequivocally good heroine, trying to get everyone to work together and escape, and Ouma by contrast seems mean and unreasonable for arguing with her in front of everyone. We’re not supposed to linger on the fact that he makes several good points about everyone else’s safety and exhaustion because how he goes about it is off-putting and unlikable.

Not only that, but we as first-time players aren’t supposed to know about all the similarities that Ouma and Kaede actually have in common, despite their differences on the matter of group cooperation. We’re not supposed to know just yet that they both want to save the group, no matter what it takes, or that both of them are willing to go to extreme, sometimes morally grey measures in order to try and stop the killing game. We’re not supposed to know right away that Ouma can be every bit as self-sacrificing as Kaede, despite the selfish things that he says in front of the others, or that when push comes to shove, Kaede is willing to lie almost as much as he is.

We don’t know any of that, initially—which is why that scene hits so hard and sets Ouma up to be so unpleasant. But I think going back on a replay and evaluating it again is pretty interesting specifically because of all these similarities that I’ve listed. The fact that they clash here is especially interesting, given the sort of roles they embody to the rest of the group, with Kaede deliberately choosing to be someone that the entire group relies on and finds trustworthy, while Ouma later sets himself up to become a villain who’s hated by everyone. And despite this, their goals are largely one and the same: expose the ringleader and end the killing game.

I think it’s specifically because Kaede realized she couldn’t continue pushing everyone to do the things she wanted them to, no matter how badly she wanted everyone to cooperate and escape together, and that’s ultimately why she turns to Plan B when she hears from Saihara about the bookshelf hiding the ringleader’s lair in the library. And for all that she does want to trust and cooperate with everyone else, she actually goes about this plan in the most Ouma-like way possible: by doing everything herself and without telling anyone her real intentions, not even Saihara.

Something I especially like about Kaede as a character is just how nuanced she is. Because she is simultaneously the brave, trustworthy, outgoing protagonist that we see her as, but she’s also so, so much more than that. She’s fiercely determined and cares about everyone else, yes, but it’s also because she cares so much that she’s willing to do things like lie and attempt murder behind everyone else’s back.

If we look at the audition videos as any sort of clue as to what the characters might’ve been like before the start of the game, I do think there was a somewhat more skeptical, cynical side of Kaede deep down that didn’t quite trust other people—and that’s all the more reason she wanted to trust them and work together with all of them, because she knew exactly how hard it was to do so. It’s such an interesting contrast from Ouma, who could easily have used all his lies and charm to cooperate with people if he wanted to, but who instead continually pushes people away because of his skepticism, all the while pretending to act completely arrogant and self-assured in his plans. Deep down, I think both of them were much more vulnerable than they were ever willing to show in front of other people.

And I think by the end of chapter 1, Ouma became more or less aware of that side of Kaede, once she confesses everything she tried to do to end the killing game. Prior to this, I personally think Ouma still very much liked and respected her guts and her attempts at leading the group, but that he ultimately thought she was doomed by her reliance on trust and cooperation when they didn’t even know who the ringleader was within their group. But I think that after hearing just how far she was willing to go to stop the killing game, including but not limited to lying to everyone else and going behind their backs with her own plan, he couldn’t help but respect her even more. Despite his accusations that she was too soft or naïve for trusting everyone else, her actual attempted solution was far closer to his own outlook than he initially gave her credit for.

This is why, just before Kaede is about to be executed, Ouma drops all of his usual acts and facades with her and gives her a sincere goodbye, telling her that she “wasn’t boring.” And this is really the highest compliment someone like Ouma can give: she did take him by surprise and surpass all his expectations from her, and I do believe he was genuinely sad to see her go when she attempted such a huge sacrifice for everyone else’s sakes.

Truly, the only part of her plan that I think he disagreed with was the act of (attempted) murder in and of itself. He felt that despite her good intentions, she had “crossed a line” that shouldn’t be crossed, and that she fell into the ringleader’s trap the moment the idea of murder crossed her mind. Considering how much DICE’s “no murder” taboo guided Ouma throughout the game, it’s not surprising at all that this is where he disagreed with Kaede. Though ironically, he himself crosses the same line in chapter 4 when he decides the only possible solution to Miu’s attempt on his life is to kill her himself, and therefore winds up getting his hands dirty without ever directly committing murder, much like Kaede herself.

Questioning how they might’ve gotten along if Kaede had actually lived past chapter 1 and continued being the game’s protagonist is interesting, mainly because so many factors would change as a result. Kaede and Saihara are so fundamentally different as protagonists, and Kaede herself is much more in line with what we would expect from a Hope’s Peak protagonist instead. Kodaka himself has described her in an interview as being extremely similar to Asahina, and I personally think she’s something of a combination between Asahina’s outgoing attitude and Maizono’s carefully crafted façade (not to mention moral ambiguity). So it stands to reason that the game and its themes wouldn’t quite be the same if Kaede were still the protagonist.

On the one hand, I do think there would be interesting potential for a possible alliance between her and Ouma, especially given how similar they could both be. Ouma himself proposes such an alliance to her in one of his FTEs, though she does get angry and shoots him down, as I mentioned earlier. But it’s interesting to consider if Kaede might’ve been more willing to cooperate in smaller, one-on-one alliances if she had attempted her plan in chapter 1 and failed without getting executed for it.

There’s also the fact that Ouma claims to remember her and everyone else adamantly in his FTEs with her, even going so far as to claim that she and everyone else forgot about him, even though he never forgot about them. It’s unclear whether he’s referring to his memories from before the game still being intact (which is likely, since he’s pretty skeptical of the flashback lights right away), or if there’s some other explanation for it, but personally, I don’t think it can be dismissed as a complete lie. Even if Kaede herself accuses him of lying and making it all up, he goes uncharacteristically blank and claims that “even he’s not that good at lying.”

This adds huge potential to Kaede sticking around, as there could easily be an underlying mystery element. In addition to the trials themselves and the mystery of the outside world, it’d be very possible to explore their dynamic further, as well as why Ouma said the things he did and if he was actually telling the truth about knowing her and everyone else from before. Kaede is absolutely persistent enough that I feel like she would’ve pressed him for details about this, especially once it became clear in the main plot that their memories were unreliable.

On the other hand, it’s really unclear if Ouma would’ve still been willing to offer that alliance to Kaede once she had attempted to commit murder. Assuming the events of chapter 1 stay more or less the same and the only difference is that Kaede survives instead of getting executed, this raises some potential problems with Ouma actually working together with her or trusting her. She did, as he puts it, “cross the line”—even if her murder attempt wasn’t successful, Ouma claims that she was already too far gone the moment she even considered murder as a possible solution. This could definitely cause another clash of opinions between them, especially as Ouma is much too paranoid to work directly with anyone who he thinks might kill him.

Another potential source of conflict in my opinion is the Hope’s Peak flashback light in chapter 5. Unlike Saihara, who deals primarily with questions of “truth or lies” and is ultimately able to see through Tsumugi’s false ultimatum in chapter 6 with the choice of either the “hope ending” or “despair ending,” Kaede is, as I mentioned, much more in line with what you’d expect from a Hope’s Peak protagonist. She’s extremely smart of course, but she has a bit of a reckless, headstrong streak where she tends to act based on emotion rather than reason, and this could get her into quite a lot of trouble once Tsumugi started rewriting everyone’s memories in chapter 5.

Saihara was able to see that both of the choices Tsumugi presented in the final trial were bullshit and would ultimately keep the cycle of Danganronpa ongoing, but I’m not entirely sure if Kaede would realize the same thing, or even if she did eventually realize it, I’m not sure it would’ve been in time to stop it. Because of her self-sacrificing nature, I personally think she would’ve chosen to be one of the sacrifices for the sake of “hope,” much like Amami presumably did in season 52. This ultimately means that Kaede sticking around might have ultimately led to a “bad end” of sorts, where even if the rest of the group went free aside from her and one other sacrifice, Danganronpa itself never gets dismantled and lives to see another season.

The only possible way I see for Kaede to avoid falling into this trap and making this choice is if enough of her classmates rubbed off on her or helped her see things in less black-or-white terms like “hope” or “despair,” and in more nuanced shades of grey instead. But considering how completely fooled almost everyone was in the actual events of the game, it’s difficult to say if this would happen. She would definitely need to talk and debate with someone who viewed the flashback lights a lot more skeptically, whether it was Saihara or Ouma (or maybe even Angie), before she could reach the truth about what Tsumugi and Team Danganronpa were really after.

This analysis has gotten pretty long by this point, so I’ll just wrap things up by saying that I really do love Kaede and Ouma’s friendship, and I think they had more potential of getting along than either of them might’ve realized in canon. Despite their fundamental differences, both of them were two characters who went farther than almost anyone else in trying to stop the killing game, and both of them weren’t afraid of getting their hands dirty if necessary. I think the fact that Ouma claims to remember Kaede and everyone else from before the killing game is super interesting, and I would’ve absolutely loved to see it touched on more if Ouma had lived longer.

All in all, Kaede is such an amazing, morally grey character who really helps to establish what we can expect from the rest of the game, and I think that’s part of what makes her so memorable. Maybe one day we’ll get some sort of DR:IF equivalent where we get a semi-canon look into a scenario where everyone lives, and hopefully there we could see not only more of Kaede being a protagonist figure, but also more of her interactions with Ouma and everyone else.

[prompt-master]

Shuichi doesn’t have flaws, he gets over his shitty self esteem the moment you shill and praise him. His backstory and legacy a Gary Stu development. He solves one case with luck and gets his talent handed to him on silver platter. If it’s fake, then why should a tv company and audience listen to a brat that willingly signed up to the show in the first place? It makes Shuichi sound arrogant. Also everyone loves Shuichi, even Miu, Tenko and Kokichi want him. So yeah he is perfect. (Con)

(Con) Shuichi’s arc isn’t different either, he took Komaru’s “believe in yourself”, beloved by everyone like Makoto, but less and has Hajime’s pessimism. Also the difference between Kaede and Makoto. Kaede would be willing to vote Junko to her death, while Makoto would want Tsumugi alive. Kaede has her gray morals and people call her out on her behavior. At least until her death where Kodaka stops seeing her as a person, but Shuichi’s dead waifu and has no impact on anyone. (Con)

(Con) Besides if Shuichi and Kaede were the opposite gender. People call Fem Shuichi a Mary Sue, because they love ripping apart female characters. Then again if they were the opposite gender, Kodaka would kill Fem Shuichi, because “she’s too smart” for the killing game and give male Kaede a compelling character arc, because he views female characters as disposable. That’s he what sees them as.

--------------------------------------------------------

I think i’m gonna have to use bullets for this cuz there's a lot to talk about here.

1. I think you might have misunderstood what I meant when I said that Akamatsu is the “perfect protag” and Saihara is not. I did not mean that Akamatsu has no flaws (she def does, one even got her killed), I meant that she suits the role of a danganronpa protagonist almost perfectly.  She's not a perfect person or even a perfect character, but being the protagonist works for her.

2. I don’t think calling Saihara a gary stu is really a valid argument because in all honestly I could call all the protags that. I could call Akamatsu a mary sue if I wished and I’m sure some people would agree. It’s too broad a definition and a mary sue archetype does not mean they are a bad character.  Everyone's definition of Mary Sue is different, so it's impossible to know what any given person MEANS by it, the colloquial term encompasses everything from physical warping of the universe to fit them in such a way the character is unaware that it's happening- to just a character that could be considered a little bit over powered or "lacking the flaws necessary to have that much power.

3. I can understand why would see Saihara as a bad protagonist or at least a boring one. I think that there’s a lot of conflict in the writing and Saihara’s character development. It goes back and forth a lot (usually in and out of trials and such) on his confidence. One second he’s doing fine in trial, the next he’s in his bed with suicidal thoughts. Saihara himself doesn’t even want to be a protag, let alone a detective, but the game requires him to be an active participant which means his arc comes off really weak. I personally think that Saihara got confident too fast! He needed a slower build up, but the danganronpa formula does not allow for that. Because like I said Saihara is not SUITED to be a protagonist. 

4. You say that Saihara has no flaws but then I think you listed some flaws! Saihara has major attachment issues, he gets attached to people really quickly. Akamatsu and Momota are the big obvious examples of this. Like I mentioned Saihara also has depression, anxiety, he still has self esteem issues afterwards (it just feels weird because of the games in and out perspective on it). Saihara is a good character with a good arc who was done injustice by the gameplay. It makes his character and his arc seem weak. 

5. I don’t think the “female saihara” argument really has much to do with this topic. Again it just kinda sounds like you hate Saihara and wish Akamatsu was the protag (again, this is likely because Akamatsu is the “perfect protag” but Saihara is not designed in a way that the protag role can lend well to him)

6. I agree that Akamatsu would send Enoshima to her death. But that doesn’t neglect my point at all. I had said that should Akamatsu stay the protagonist she would not end the full game cycle and would just end this particular game. Saihara’s goal was not “kill the mastermind” his goal was “screw this game. This is bs. No more participating” which lends to ending the cycle ITSELF. I think the way they showed this (the whole yelling at people to log off) was weak and illogical, but his goal is still vastly different.

7. You say that Saihara is an arrogant brat for wanting to end the game when he signed up for it but...then wouldn’t everyone be an arrogant brat? Akamatsu and Amami had ending the game be their very first goal. Ouma also worked to end the game. Everyone wanted it to end despite signing up for it. There’s also the fact that this doesn’t really matter when they don’t HAVE the memories of signing up. Even when shown he did, why should Saihara CARE? He’s a different person with different memories now. And don’t forget about Gonta. 

8. I don’t think Hinata is a pessimist. He seems to be a strong realist. Even in chapter 6 when he is depressed, he still seems to hold a rather realist perspective. The protags mentality follow the themes of the game. THH is optimistic like Naegi, SDR2 is realist like Hinata, and V3 is pessimistic like Saihara. So yes, his arc IS different at its core, whether it was well written or not. There is also the fact that the protags all ease into their trauma over time (even Hinata as he doesn’t remember his until later) while Saihara has trauma from the beginning and is traumatized again and again. This itself is a different format. 

9. Everyone loving Saihara is not necessarily a GOOD thing. You see this the best in ch4, and it’s a shame they didn’t go anywhere with it. But everyone aside from Ouma becomes insanely reliant on Saihara and his talent. A talent Saihara doesn’t even WANT. Saihara is under a lot of pressure to use his talent to save everyone, and they all see this and think less for themselves as a result of it.  the characters, even momota and harukawa at times, begin to see him less and less as Saihara and more as "the ultimate detective"

10. Also you say Akamatsu’s death has no impact on anyone when I would say its a major impact on EVERYONE. I could say a lot for this, but Akamatsu’s last wish hit everyone really hard. This leaves them later more susceptible to Momota’s toxic trust system, and leaves them more willing to be overly reliant on Saihara as he was the source of her last wish. 

It’s fine to hate Saihara and just not vibe well with him! It’s fine to think he was boring and badly written! It’s fine to just...not vibe well with a character. I’m not giving you these reasons to say you have to love him, but rather why I think your reasons for doing so are a bit misguided.

[a-student-out-of-time]

There's a good and a bad way to subvert expectations. Unfortunately what's been happening a lot lately is that many works go for twists for the sake of being twists, the Star Wars Sequels being a prime example of this. Or the later sessions of Game of Thrones. There is a fine balance between being able to surprise your audience and not being extremely predictable.

//I’ve absorbed more complaints and feelings from both those series through pop-culture osmosis than I have from watching them. I’m more of a casual observer, but I do have some feelings on both these points (which I will put under here if you’re interested.)

//tl;dr version: I think we should unbiasedly judge media on its own merits and look over what works internally within the story and what doesn’t, be willing to make our own judgements rather than jump on bandwagons and tell people what they should or shouldn’t like, and not treat opinions as straight facts.

//And also that I’m honestly tired of hearing about the sequels and GoT ^^;

//I disagree with a lot of people on the Star Wars sequels (aside from 9, fuck 9), but I’d rather not start a debate about it nor their quality overall. Only that I think people really overreacted to them  and many others jumped on the hate bandwagon when emotions were running high.

//Frankly, many of the criticisms I saw about the films felt either wildly inconsistent about what they’re upset about or what they wanted it to be (7 was criticized for being too much like old Star Wars, 8 for not being enough like old Star Wars) and others felt like they came from bad faith and I can’t take them seriously.

//And yes, the last season of Game of Thrones is trash and wrecked everyone’s storylines for the sake of being shocking, but let’s also be real: GoT was never going to have a happy ending if it wanted to stick to its “realism.” Whoever got on the Iron Throne was inevitably going to have to purge all opposition to consolidate power. That’s just how real revolutions and coups work.

//To be clear, Daenerys’ turn to evil murderousness was stupidly executed, but it wasn’t necessarily unprecedented. What I frankly dislike about fantasy in general is its tendency toward the Divine Right of Kings. That only certain bloodlines have the right to rule and you just need to put the “rightful heir” on the throne. In other words, giving absolute power to a magically omnibenevolent person will fix everything. I may be an optimistic humanist, but I know that simply doesn’t happen.

//The entire point of GoT is that DRoK is stupid and royalty in general really kinda sucks. If you go back, you see most of the lords we follow, including “good king” Eddard Stark, are either totally indifferent to the masses or are completely sadistic and torture them for funsies since the legal system doesn’t protect peasants.

//The Starks are no better than the Lannisters simply by virtue of being overall “nicer” than them. Both sides start wars that get thousands of people killed. Also, everybody loved John Snow, but he also fucking hanged a kid and I’ve never heard anyone bring that up since.

//Most importantly, Daenerys was a likable character with a sympathetic backstory, but even before the last season, she was fully embracing being a Targaryen by blood and was openly murdering people who got in her way while she was conquering territory after territory.

//Yes, a lot of the people she killed were slaveholders, but let’s be real for a moment: not everyone who participates in an evil system is evil themselves. It’s easy for us as the audience to judge them for participating in a slavocracy, but living in one comes with being told slavery is okay. That doesn’t make them evil by nature, just subject to the biases of their culture.

//Also, slavery is evil but conquering people is fine? And burning people to death for opposing you is acceptable since you’re going to be better and free everyone, or because you had a sympathetic backstory? These are the kinds of things that get villains criticized for, but is treated as a necessary evil at worst for the protagonists.

//This is protagonist-centered morality. The show is framing it in a way where you’re being drawn in to see it that way, but also telling you not to see blatant hypocrisies for what they really are. Daenerys was even called as mad as her father by Tyrion. It wasn’t well-executed, but it was going to happen regardless of how much anyone liked her.

//Violence for a good cause is still violence. If you’re going to burn people for disagreeing with you, then say that other people shouldn’t and should listen to others, that’s full-on hypocrisy. That goes for most of the characters in the show, frankly, and the message is executed well for most of it.

//That being said, don’t think this means I think the last season of GoT is good, that the Star Wars sequels are perfect, or that I hate all fantasy books ever. That’s not what I’m saying. I try to enjoy what’s good about them and point out their flaws regardless.

//What I’m saying is it’s important to, when you want to be critical of media, put your feelings and biases aside and judge the media you’re criticizing on its own merits. In my opinion, the claims that the sequels only did things to subvert expectations is unfounded. They were going their own direction, which was admittedly controversial and not what many people wanted, but just because you don’t want it to happen doesn’t mean it’s a bad twist

//Just like how a character isn’t a Mary Sue just because they’re too OP or you don’t like them. That’s not what that term means and hearing people use it like that irritates me. While I do have my complaints about characters, people use that term as if it’s a form of literary criticism that has more use than is necessary.

//If a character is OP, they’re OP. If a character is flat, they’re flat. If a character is poorly written, they’re poorly written. If a character is at the center of the universe and literally everything else exists just to amplify them and their role in things, then they’re likely a Mary Sue/Gary Stu. It’s not a label to slap on  a character you don’t like or to give a critique (or complaint) more weight.

//This is why I say DR3 Chiaki isn’t a Mary Sue, she’s just not a very well written character. All Mary Sues are poorly written characters, but not all poorly written characters are Mary Sues. She’s not terrible, but she’s not explored much and her only big roles are being the person who brings Class 77-B together and her death turns them to despair.

//While her death was tragic and brutal, we didn’t really get a good look at who she was as a person beyond just being nice and opening up to her friends. If they’d expanded on that a little more, maybe it would’ve been more effective, but the way she died felt...manipulative and shock baity in a lot of ways since it banked mostly on our familiarity with her despite it being a totally different person.

//DR3 honestly had a whole host of shocky and just plain gross scenes that I really don’t think needed to be there.

//But likewise, if a story has a plot twist that you don’t like, that doesn’t automatically make it purely shock bait or subverting expectations just for the sake of doing so. There’s a difference between “this character was evil all along and there were a lot of clues and we just didn’t want to believe it” and “this character was evil all along for reasons we’re dumping on you now.”

//Just so I don’t seem like a hypocrite, while I personally don’t like what happened with Mikan in chapter 3 of SDR2, it was an effective way of foreshadowing the truth of them being the remnants of despair. It was set up that every had lost their memories and this was a sign that getting them back wasn’t necessarily going to have a good outcome.

//And I’ll be real: I can’t take a lot of the complaints about the Sequels or GoT seriously because much of it carries overtones of racism, sexism and antisemitism. For those more into Star wars, I think you know what I mean already and that’s all I’ll say. As for GoT, I’ve seen reddit posts viscerally attacking the writers directly and even saying that we should’ve expected the ending to suck since it was “written by Jews.”

//Yeah, go figure I can’t read any of that. I know not all people who hated the show’s ending or the films are like that, but it’s impossible to deny that those attitudes are very real.

//In the end, if you want to be critical of media, the worst way to do that is to just watch a video of someone complaining about it for half an hour. Yes, those video essays can be fun, but the only way to be truly critical of media you enjoy is to examine it yourself and look closely at what’s in it and how it’s presented. That goes doubly for shows you like.

//I know not everyone will do that and all opinions are ultimately subjective, but don’t let someone else tell you that you should hate something or that something is bad just because they didn’t like how it ended. Watch or read it yourself and draw your own conclusions. Don’t just follow the crowd and also be respectful of people who don’t agree with you. You can learn a lot when you talk to someone with a different opinion.

[princeasimdiya12]

That anon is an asshole. Why do you hate Shuichi? I think he fits the theme of truth and lies, but his character development is a complete joke as he has zero struggles after his waifu dead. He never once second guess his actions in class trials and doesn’t even think of major consequences (killing the de facto prime minister and not noticing a serial killer is amoung them). His stans over analyze his actions and try to justify everything he does.

They were quite a jerkhole. I can imagine that most stans would be protective of their favorite characters if anyone were to express disapproval.

And thank you for giving me the opportunity to express my personal feelings on the matter anon. And those are some interesting reasons to dislike him but I have some other reasons.

My answers will be hidden under the “Read More” because they’re long answers. But these are my thoughts and reasons for why I hate Shuichi Saihara.

Reason 1: The Protagonist Switch was Lackluster

Right off the bat, I personally dislike that we were promised a unique and compelling protagonist like Kaede only to switch her with a generic insecure protagonist like Saihara. The use of the protag switch isn’t a bad plot twist and it can be clever, it’s just that the result of switching Kaede for someone like Saihara left a bad taste in my mouth.

I loved Kaede because she was unique as a DR protagonist. Along with having a colorful design and talent, she was assertive, confident and willing to take charge. She was actively involved in the story by stepping up as the group’s de facto leader and trying to motivate them. She was also flawed in the sense that she was quick to butt heads with others and she didn’t completely trust others or practice her own beliefs of trusting in friends. And personally, I’m not even upset that she tried to kill someone. It’s still considered something different for a DR protagonist to do, especially if it was for the greater good. 

But when we get Saihara, he continues the trend of being a generic sad boy who feels insecure about his talents and wants to be stronger. Most of his screentime is spent moping about his problems and how he doesn’t feel good enough. He doesn’t have the same presence as Kaede and just stays in the background while the rest of the cast move the story as much as they can.

In all honesty, if they had introduced Saihara as the new protagonist, or at least make it so that his predecessor wasn’t as compelling as Kaede, then I wouldn’t have been too upset. At the very least I wouldn’t have gotten my hopes up for a protagonist who was actually different compared to the past protags.

Reason 2: Waifus In Refrigerators 

For those that don’t know, fridging is the concept of (brutally) killing off a fictional female character in order to create an emotional impact for her male love interest and his character development.

Kaede’s death and how it impacted Saihara is textbook fridging.

I strongly detest fridging since it robs a female character of her agency and role in the story. It treats her as a tool meant to motivate her male love interest to either avenge her death or grow as a person. Kaede’s death along with her final wish is what pushes Saihara to try and beat the killing game. And from then on, Saihara will take the moment to reflect on Kaede’s tragic end and how he inspired him with her kindness. Kaede loses her identity as a complex leader who was willing to commit murder for a greater good. Everyone just remembers her as Saihara’s innocent dead love interest who inspired him to keep on fighting. It’s also worse in the 6th case when it’s revealed that Tsumugi took advantage of Kaede’s trap to kill Amami which further pushes Kaede into the image of an innocent angel that did no wrong.

And it’s also frustrating since this isn’t the only time that the Danganronpa series has killed off its female characters in order to develop their male love interests.

In SDR2, Peko dies trying to save Fuyuhiko which in turn motivates him to stop acting like a jerkhole and be more cooperative with the group.

In DR3 Future Side, Chisa is the first victim of the killing game which pushes her boyfriend Munakata to become a more direct antagonist towards Naegi for protecting the Remnants.

In the same series, Kyoko allows herself to be poisoned in order to protect Naegi. It’s through her death that Naegi decides to confront Munakata in a final showdown. And while Kyoko does get brought back to life at the end of the show, it should be noted that she was only brought back just to be part of Naegi’s happy ending package. She loses her agency and is brought back just to be his newly revived girlfriend.

In DR3 Despair Side, Chiaki is brutally killed in order for her classmates to become Remnants of Despair. But it’s her final heartwrenching moments with Izuru that inspire emotion inside of him aswell as deciding to turn against Junko.

So Kaede being killed for Saihara’s development is the fifth fridging example in this series and it sucks that Kodaka and his crew rely on this trope throughout Danganronpa.

Reason 3: The Narrative Forces You To Like Him

Another issue that I found irritating about Saihara is how everyone began praising him.

Just after the first case, everyone constantly praises and coddles Saihara for being such a great detective and for growing so much. For me, that praise feels undeserving since he barely did anything to earn it. Thinking back to each of the past protagonists, they didn’t have everyone’s respect in the beginning. They each had to work had and face adversity throughout their stories in order to earn their praise and respect. Even Kaede, who despite being a confident leader, had to deal with people frequently judging her leadership and actions. So I find it questionable that Saihara already earned everyone’s respect after solving only one case. 

By having all the characters praise Saihara, the narrative pushes you to accept him as the new protagonist and recognize how awesome it is to have him. But for me, it just makes me dislike him even more. I refuse to like something just because everyone else does and it won’t take away my admiration/love for Kaede.

It’s also jarring since anytime a character has the spotlight, it somehow has to involve Saihara.

“Wow Himiko! You’re much more expressive now than before. Just like you Saihara!”

“Man, it sounds like you had a harsh life growing up Harumaki. Just like you and your detective work, eh Shuichi?”

The narrative can’t help but force Saihara to be around and praised by the people around him despite the spotlight not being on him in that given moment. 

Reason 4: He’s Not a Good Detective

While Saihara’s role as a detective may fit the theme of Truth and Lies, that doesn’t mean he was good at the job. My issue being that he was unproductive and biased for the role.

While he did set up that trap in Chapter 1 to catch the mastermind, he doesn’t do anything as proactive in the later chapters. He spent most if not all of his time going to training with Kaito and moping about his problems. It goes on like this for 4 chapters and it takes Kiibo threatening to blow up the school before he actually gets to work on solving the mystery of the killing game. As a detective, you’d think he would put more effort into actually solving the mysteries of the killing game or try to put some thought on who the mastermind could be.

The biased part comes with how he interacts with others and how he’s more critical of people based on how they treat him. Saihar has a tendency to be very judgmental towards the students and doesn’t look at the entire picture. 

He writes off Ouma as the embodiment of lies and doesn’t bother trying to learn more about him or his true motivations. 

And on the opposite side, he openly praises his friends while blatantly ignoring the problematic things they’d done throughout the story. 

He considers Kaede to be an inspirational role model despite how she betrayed him and wanted to commit murder behind his back.

He worships Kaito and treats him as a perfect hero despite never noticing his ongoing illness or the fact that Kaito didn’t trust his friends enough to reveal his own insecurities.

He deems Maki a reliable friend despite the fact that she went behind his and everyone’s back in order to kill Ouma and was willing to gamble everyone else’s lives if it meant taking revenge on the supreme leader.

Shouldn’t a detective be more persistent when presented with a mystery while also acknowledging all the sides (both good and bad) of a given person? If his personal bias was treated as a flaw by the narrative, then that would actually give his character significant depth. Especially if he worked on managing his biases and learning to acknowledge all the sides. But it isn’t treated as a bad problem.

For me, the fact that he’s supposed to be a detective who “grows stronger” and is so good at his job despite all of this really rubs me the wrong way. If anything, it shows me that he’s really bad at the job.

Also, I would like to bring up that I don’t count him investigating the murder cases as being a good detective. Why? Because Hajime and his class in SDR2 were able to solve their class trials without a detective figure. Being a detective, or having one, doesn’t make solving the class trials any easier.

Reason 5: An Unnecessary Cliche

Personally, I really see no reason for why Saihara’s character needed to be the generic insecure protagonist for this particular installment of Danganronpa. It’s the same cliche storyline featured in a grand majority of anime and light novels. It’s repetitive and irritating knowing that so many stories focus primarily on a sad generic boy who doesn’t feel good enough and wants to be stronger. 

It’s also worth mentioning that in comparison, the past protagonists at least had narrative reasons for why they were generic and insecure in the first place.

For Naegi, he was the first protagonist of the installment and his normalcy was meant to contrast the extremely talented and radically different students he’d be involved with. As the game progresses, he uses his normalness to bond with the students and rally them together in the name of hope.

For Hajime, he’s treated as a deconstruction of the generic insecure protagonist. It’s because his feelings of inferiority and longing to be special that he decides to accept Hope’s Peak’s experimentation and become Izuru Kamakura: an incredibly talented super-being who lost his humanity.

For Komaru, she was regarded as an ordinary girl that had the potential to lead others which is recognized by the adult resistance and Monaca. So throughout the game, both sides were pushing her into becoming either the next symbol of Hope like Naegi or next symbol of despair like Junko. But she ultimately decides to be neither of them and wants to be her own person.

There were reasons for why each of these protagonists were considered generic and insecure as it contributed to the narratives. But for Saihara, there’s really no solid reason for why he’s the only normal one of the V3 cast. And everyone is more than happy to praise him as the best one out of the cast despite doing so little to earn it. At most, Tsumugi reveals that Saihara being an insecure boy who grew stronger thanks to his friends was for the sake of a fictional storyline. Obviously it was meant to mentally break him but it honestly feels like a weak reason to keep the trend of a generic insecure sad boy. Not to mention there are other reasons for why I believe this doesn’t work.

The setup for the “Danganronpa is a fictional TV show” twist didn’t have enough buildup so it doesn’t make the cliche that strong.

Saihara still continues the role of the insecure boy who grows strong and saves the day. While Tsumugi states that his role was written for him, Saihara still continues the tropes of his archetype by saving the day. It’s ultimately because of him that he’s able to convince his friends and the viewing audience to give up on Danganronpa. It was the writer’s way of having their cake and eating it.

If the reveal was meant to be a shot at how it’s become a cliche, then why not live up to it? If they wanted to show how Danganronpa was running for too long or how it’s cliches were getting old, then why not commit to those ideas? Instead of having everyone praise and worship Saihara, make them question if they’re really going to depend on a generic guy to save them. Instead  of being just a cute quirk, actually show the negative sides of Saihara’s anxiety and depression and how they would hinder him from participating in trial discussions. Maybe even have Kaito lose his temper at Saihara because of how much he mopes around.

There’s so many ways they could have gone with deconstructing Saihara’s stereotype or showcasing how it’s become old and stale. So it feels disappointing that they never went that far.

And another reason for why I dislike his characterization is because it brings to mind Ryota Mitarai from the DR3 anime. Just like Saihara, Mitarai is a main character who’s described as generic, insecure and spends most of his time whining about how useless he is. Despite this, he manages to survive the killing game since the other more unique characters are killed or move the events of the story. I personally found Mitarai to be a frustrating character. I detest characters who constantly whine about how useless or miserable they are as a means of getting sympathy from the audience. So having to deal with Saihara who more or less shares multiple characteristics with Mitarai felt very exhausting.

Conclusion

So those would be my reasons for why I hate/strongly dislike Saihara. I can admit that alot of these reasons weren’t so much because of Saihara or his actions but how he was written throughout the story. He still did alot of things I didn’t like don’t get me wrong, but alot of fault can be traced to the writers and how they decided to write him and Kaede’s characters. I still find his archetype as a generic insecure boy who mopes around to be an unappealing archetype but I’m sure most of his fans would suggest otherwise.

If you’ve managed to read everything here, I’d like to thank you for taking the time to do so. I can’t imagine many people would want to read a critical post targeted towards one of the most beloved characters in Danganronpa. So thank you for doing so.

And as always, if you agree or disagree with anything I’ve written, you’re more than welcome to reblog this with your comments. I’m always up for friendly discussions. 

[blookmallow]

aaaand goodbye teruteru

------

the what now 

I GOT STUCK HERE FOR SO FUCKING LONG BC THEY GIVE YOU THIS. PILE OF INCOMPREHENSIBLE INSTRUCTIONS AND THEN NONE OF IT MAKES ANY SENSE

in dr1 they had a similar mechanic where you had to hit the buttons at the right tempo to knock out their statements, which was also confusing but i was starting to get decently good at it by the end of the game, but in this one the timing is TOTALLY OFF and i kept missing every single one and couldn’t figure out why, then realized it worked sometimes if i held down the button instead of just clicking it like you do in dr1 (which they didn’t explain!!! in this one!!!) but eventually figured out if i just like. double clicked on the beat i could break them for some reason. i dont know why. it works and i cannot explain how 

but then at the end when you reach the final strike, you have to put together a phrase out of four words to refute “where could the weapon have been?” and i was CONVINCED it was “On The Meat Bone” (even though technically it was hidden In the bone i guess) and i didnt realize i had the phrase wrong and thought i just wasn’t hitting it correctly for some reason so i failed this like 6 times before i finally realized it was MEAT ON THE BONE 

i understand owari’s not the type to give a shit probably but do you really wanna eat meat off of the skewer that was very recently repeatedly stabbed into a guy’s abdomen 

even if he cleaned it off before he put it back thats still like, fucked up lmao 

monokuma took care of it though i guess :’ ) 

kind of alarming that he’s capable of eating now, but 

THANK YOU NANAMI 

,,,,ok

I WILL SAY that the final closing sequence is WAY better in sdr2, it’s way way clearer what you’re looking for, the blanks give you hints as to what might go there, the picture options give you descriptions of what you’re looking at (frequently i know exactly what im trying to explain but cant figure out which picture goes where bc they’re just. incomprehensible out of context) and THEY FINALLY FIXED THE SCROLL THING :’) 

i dont know if its just broken as hell with a laptop trackpad and maybe it works with a mouse (or maybe it’s just not designed for pc in the first place, this was originally. ps vita or something i think) but the scroll sensitivity was SO broken in dr1 i spent most of my time just trying desperately to scroll to the thing i needed without scrolling past it 

i still have that problem when im trying to pick which truth bullet to fire but thats not As bad as this part was in dr1 at least

ok so my bIGGEST PROBLEM WITH ALL THIS, is WHY DIDN’T TERUTERU TELL ANYBODY ABOUT THIS 

if he Knew what komaeda was up to (and he did, it’s confirmed right after this) why didn’t he just go tell not-togami right away. even if he thought nobody would believe him, that guy would have taken it very seriously since he already was on his guard and knew there was a threat 

i mean i guess like. he saw an opportunity to kill komaeda, which he could feel justified about bc he knew komaeda was already planning a murder, and if he got away with it he could escape but that still means he was willing to sacrifice everyone else 

like he does give kind of a weak attempt at asking if it counts as an exception because it was sort of self defense (komaeda couldn’t kill him from where he was but he was gonna kill Someone so he was defending. someone) but he still.... knew komaeda was going to kill somebody and made the choice to just kill him himself without warning anyone or saying Anything and then kept that fact to himself too

back in dr1 again we had this similar situation in the first trial where leon actually was acting in self defense (which is Confirmed in the manga, he doesn’t get a chance to explain it in the game) and didn’t tell anyone but like... none of them knew yet if they could get off on a technicality and we don’t know if he might’ve been hoping for that, and he didn’t know sayaka was dangerous, he didn’t make the conscious decision to go kill her without telling anyone. he probably should have asked someone else for help when she lost it but his intention was to get in there to talk it out, so like. he tried to de-escalate the situation and became a killer by accident, teruteru had plenty of time to get help and decided to kill instead. and “hey byakuya i think komaeda is planning something bad” would have been a completely logical thing to do, he would have taken it seriously and teruteru would be innocent in that scenario, vs “guys i think i just killed sayaka but hear me out i didnt mean to” would NOT have gone over well, nobody’s gonna help him or believe him when it’s Sweet Dear Precious Sayaka, naegi could barely believe she attacked him even when they proved it with evidence 

i dont know i feel like teruteru had a lot more intent behind what he did. even if he would have been absolutely fucking justified in killing komaeda and i wish he had done it correctly :’  ) i think the “i dont care about taking everyone else down with him” is way more clear-cut here 

anyway, goodbye little bastard man 

motherfucker

i still CANNOT follow komaeda’s logic here 

he’s obsessed with the Ultimates... and believes in them SOOO Much :) he’s desperate to see them overcoming the ultimate despair... so he’s gotta kill somebody... to induce ultimate despair... so they can overcome it... i GUESS???

wouldn’t defeating monokuma and making it out of here on their own strength without resorting to murder at all be the ultimate hope triumph though. what are you DOING, komaeda

what is W R O N G wiTH YOu

well there he goes

i really wish someone would

P LE ASE DO 

AKANE OWARI MY QUEEN 

its not. clear but im pretty sure she Did punch him

its a crime that we dont get to see this, but 

i mean. she’s right 

i B U K I 

[rising-generations]

Iris. [SDRA2 Sannohashi Oneshot]

read on ao3 here if you please

plot:

and i don't want the world to see me 'cause i don't think that they'd understand when everything's made to be broken i just want you to know who i am.

syobai hashimoto has to fix the biggest mistake he's ever made in his life. mikado sannoji has to deal with what syobai leaves behind when he runs away. it was never supposed to go this far.

syobai-focused sannohashi, set in the "nuclear" AU. more explained inside. featuring trans!mikado and sora/syobai friendship. tw for mentions of suicide attempt in the beginning.

notes:

So to make a long story short, this series takes place after a huge nuclear war decimated half of the human population and fucked up a lot of shit with the environment and people's bodies. Everybody knows shit's fucked. The SDRA2 kids exist in the same universe as the rest of the canon Ultimates, and everyone's around the same age (THH and NDRV3 kids are about 22, SDR2 kids are 23, SDRA2 kids are around 20-21). So everyone's an adult. Don't come for my throat. Don't like it, don't leave a nasty comment, thanks! Bad and stinky comments will be placed inside the bee oven to atone for their sins.

It's not often that Syobai admits this, but this time, he's absolutely, completely, royally, fucked up. Badly. And normally he doesn't care, but this time is so very different. Sitting at a table in a nearly-empty diner at half-past noon is not where he thought he was gonna end up today, but here he is, with his head in his hands, staring down at his phone's lock screen, counting the minutes since Sora sent her "omw" text.

This diner serves whiskey. A lot of places serve liquor now, have since the war tore the world apart and left millions of traumatized people to deal with the aftermath, many of them turning to alcohol to cope. Syobai has been drinking since the ripe old age of ten, so that's not new to him, and the whiskey they have here is strong, and it's tempting.

It's so, so tempting. But if he does that, it won't end very well for him; first of all, Sora would likely -- definitely -- beat his ass into next week if she shows up and finds him drunk. Second, in the state he's currently in emotionally, if he gets drunk, all he's going to do is remember things, and when he remembers things, he ends up waking up on the bathroom floor at 3 AM in a puddle of his own tears with a bottle of pain pills in his hand.

So Syobai won't drink. Not today, anyway. But God damn, does he really want to smoke.

As soon as he starts to get up to go outside (the diner has a no smoking policy, which he thinks is stupid considering the fact that nuclear warfare has done shit to the air they don't even know about yet, but he's not willing to get kicked out and risk a beating by Sora yet again), the universe interferes with his life once more. Sora steps in through the door of the diner.

Well there goes that plan.

She spots him fairly quickly and strides over to the booth in the back corner, sliding into the seat like nothing's changed. Syobai remembers when they'd used to skip class every Wednesday and go down to the diner down the street from Hope's Peak, the one that served all the crazy Western food, and dare each other to eat the craziest shit on the menu as fast as they could without puking or choking. Sora, of course, would win every time, and "claim her victory for all of the lesbians out there."

It's enough to make him smile a little bit. The diner was abandoned when the war started, but they still hang out there sometimes.

"So, you wanna tell me what's wrong with you?"

Sora's voice breaks through his thoughts, and Syobai lifts his head to look at her. She's got her chin in her hand, and her elbow propped on the table.

"Elbows on the table? Not very lady-like," Syobai jokes. With her free hand, Sora flips him off, and he snickers. "I'm kidding, geez. Who says there's anything wrong with me?"

Sora points at the complimentary basket of chips the diner serves with every customer. "There's food on the table, and you haven't eaten it all yet to spite me. Now, I asked you nicely. Don't make me come over there."

Well. Looks like he can't stall his explanation anymore.

He lets out a long, heavy, slow sigh, and laces his fingers together in front of him on the table. Syobai turns his grey-eyed gaze down towards the surface of the table, before forcing himself to look up and meet Sora's eyes.

"I need your help," he says simply. "I fucked up."

"You do that a lot. Elaborate."

"I fucked up really, really bad." Syobai pauses. "With Mikado."

Sora tilts her head. "Last time I asked, you told me the two of you were "just sleeping together casually." Did you lie to me, Syobai?"

Syobai swallows heavily. He can hear his heart beating in his ears.

"Mikado is pregnant," he finally says. The words actually leaving his lips feel like the final blow in a fight, and he's just lost. "With my children."

"... oh." Sora blinks a few times. "So this was an accident, I take it? Whatever happened to high school Syobai Hashimoto who carried five different types of condoms in his wallet at all times just in case he met a hot guy walking home from school?"

"Hey, in my defense, I usually still have condoms." Yes, they're a bit harder to find nowadays, as is almost everything, but up until now, he's always managed to have one on hand for when the two of them start feeling frisky (which tends to happen at least once a day). "To answer your question, though, what happened is Setsuka decided to get hitched."

"The party," Sora gasps, remembering suddenly. "Oh, my God. So you two did fuck in the bathroom! Emma owes me five thousand yen."

"Yes, we did do that," Syobai mumbles. It's not totally his fault, he thinks. It's not like Mikado wasn't grinding on him half the night, begging him to fuck him as hard as he could against the wall. It's no doubt the best sex he's ever had in his life.

And, of course, it's the one time they fuck without a condom and without pulling out. Not that that's guaranteed to help anything, but hey, it might have? Maybe it's just wishful thinking on Syobai's part.

"So what's the problem?" Sora continues. "Does he not want the babies?"

Syobai looks away. "I, uh. I don't know."

Sora's eyes narrow dangerously. "You didn't talk to him about it?"

Syobai gives a dry laugh. "Well, ya see, that's where the whole "I fucked up really bad" bit comes in."

"What'd you do." This isn't spoken as a question, somehow, as Sora's voice deepens. She's already pissed off, great, and Syobai has a feeling she won't be any happier when he tells this part of the story.

"Um." Syobai swallows again, more nervous this time. "I... I ran off."

Silence. "Excuse me?" Sora says. "You wanna run that by me again?"

Syobai still isn't meeting her eyes. He recalls exactly how the exchange went, just about two hours ago now.

"I'm pregnant."

The world stops turning.

Mikado's holding his hands over his stomach, gloved fingers gripping the fabric of his shirt so tightly his hands shake. Syobai, on the other hand, just. Stands there. Staring at Mikado, completely speechless.

Before he knows it, his body is reacting all on its own. Syobai opens his mouth, trying to form an intelligent response, but all that comes out is two words he'll regret deeply:

"I can't."

Before Mikado reacts to that, Syobai yanks the front door open and takes off down the street, running and running and running until he can't, falling to his knees behind the 7-11 -- how the hell did he get there, it's a mile from the house -- choking and coughing before he inevitably pukes from the strain of running so far, so fast.

This all goes through his head in the span of about two seconds. "I just stood there like an idiot," Syobai finally says. "I -- I said I can't and then I ran." His hand curls into a fist. "I ran like the dumb fucking coward I am." He brings his fist down on the table as hard as he can. Sora doesn't jump, instead staring at him evenly. "Go ahead and say it. I know you want to."

"You're right for once. What the hell is wrong with you?" Sora snaps. "I know that taking responsibility for your numerous fuck-ups is completely foreign to you, and usually you get away with it with no consequences because that's just how it is when you deal with people you don't care about and criminals, and hey, I can let it go when it's some nameless Yakuza dude who got assassinated with a gun you sold someone 'cause I don't care either," she begins. "But then, you turn around and do this shit? To Mikado? To someone we all know, and yeah, he might be a rat, but he doesn't deserve to be left high and dry and pregnant and scared because you --" And here she points at him, Syobai flinching as every word cuts deeper, "-- are a fucking coward. You're God damn right you screwed up."

"I was scared," Syobai says, his weak attempt at a protest surprising even himself.

"You were scared?" Sora laughs, and it's bitter. "That's funny. It's funny that you were scared. How do you think Mikado feels right now? Alone, facing the possibility of having to raise more than one child by himself after the man he's spent half of high school madly in love with, and the man he's been sleeping with for the past six months, ran away when he told him he'd gotten him pregnant?"

There's really nothing he can say to that. Syobai sighs shakily. "I wasn't just scared because he's pregnant," he finally says. "I was scared because..."

He shuts his eyes.

"Because I love him. I love him, so much that it hurts, and I may as well have just stabbed him right in the chest."

"And you're not used to that," Sora says. "You're not used to caring for anyone except yourself. But as long as you kept telling yourself it was just for fun, and there were no feelings involved, you could shrug it off. Maybe a part of you thought Mikado felt the same way, like it was just a game. Then he started to make your world wider, you started to get comfortable with it, and you got scared. Then he came to you, and told you that it wasn't just him anymore, and you panicked. You couldn't handle it. But instead of staying there and talking to him about it like an adult, you were just cryptic, and then you ran away."

Syobai opens his eyes and looks over at Sora. He somehow looks even older than he usually does. "Yeah. Yeah, you got me there." He swallows, heavily, and his mouth tastes like copper from how hard he's been chewing on his inner lip. "It was just supposed to be for fun. It was never supposed to be serious."

"Yeah, well, tough shit," Sora shrugs. "Mikado's pregnant. You're gonna be a dad. You could run all the way to America and it wouldn't change a thing. The only difference is, Mikado has to live with what you gave him forever. You've got two choices: you can drag your sorry ass home and show Mikado you're sorry, or you can keep running away. But, I'll have you know..." And here, Sora's voice darkens, and she looks more dangerous now than she ever did before even with a gun in her hands, "If you leave him like that? And if you ever run away from him like that again? And dare to show your face in Japan again? I will personally hunt you down and make you beg for me to kill you. Understand?"

"... yeah. I understand," Syobai replies. He runs a hand through his hair while Sora takes a couple of breaths to calm herself down. "I don't want to leave him. But I don't think I'm ready to be a father. Or much of anything, really." He looks down at his hands, rough and calloused and forever stained with the blood of so many that only he can see. "What if I can't love them?"

"If you love Mikado as much as you say you do, you'll fall in love with those babies way before they're ever born," Sora tells him. "Listen. This world's gone to shit. It's gonna be hard to raise a family like this. That's why Yoruko and I are waiting. But it's a little too late for you to do that, so all you can do is suck it up and do everything you can to make sure they never have to be a part of what we were."

Sora's words seal Syobai's decision.

---

He tries calling Mikado to tell him he's coming home for an hour, and gets absolutely no response. A part of Syobai is worried, desperately hoping Mikado didn't do something stupid and end up hurting himself, and wants to get home as soon as he can, but...

The other part of him feels like if he just shows up at home with no warning, it'll only make the situation that much worse.

So he calls, and calls, and calls, and gets sent to voicemail over and over, until finally, there's an answer.

"Fucking Syobai Hashimoto," a voice that is decidedly not Mikado's comes through the speaker. "I ought to skin you alive and wear you like a fur coat. How dare you."

Syobai sighs and frowns, rubs a hand over his face. "Hello, Nikei."

"Don't you hello, Nikei me!" The furious man spits over the phone. "Ever since Mikado told me you two were a thing, I've been looking for a reason to shoot you and make Why Syobai Hashimoto's Death Should be Celebrated as a National Holiday an article on the front page news for a month straight! Now I finally get a reason and I can't even do it because Mikado wants his kids to know their scumbag father!"

Syobai pauses. "... he wants me to come back?"

"I want you to come back, too," Nikei starts to say. "So I can beat you to death with a baseball bat." It sounds like he wants to say more, but then Syobai hears a very quiet, muffled voice in the background. It has to be Mikado. He strains to hear, but it's no use, because the phone doesn't pick up exactly what he's saying. A few seconds later, though, he hears Nikei give a heavy sigh.

"Alright, fine. Mikado wants to hear you out, so I won't be here when you get back, sadly," Nikei mutters. "But I can be there in ten minutes tops if he calls me back, and I'd love to see you try to outrun my bullets."

"Point taken." Syobai closes his eyes and lets out a slow breath. "Tell him to leave the door unlocked. I'm coming home."

---

It takes a little under an hour for Syobai to get home. He has to walk all the way there, after all, and he's already tired, but he pushes through. By the time he makes it to the driveway, it feels like his legs are about to fall off.

Then he gets to the front door, puts his hand on the doorknob, and hesitates. It's like all of the exhaustion evaporates, replaced by pure adrenaline and the urge to turn around and start running again.

No. He's made up his mind. Syobai closes his eyes, the mental image of Mikado laughing brightly in his arms appearing to him with no trouble at all, without him even needing to think about it.

God. All the things he would do to make that smile come back to Mikado's face. All the things he would do to forget the look of heartbreak he saw for just a split second when they were standing in the living room.

He turns the doorknob and walks inside the empty living room. His feet land in the same place they were, and he lets the door close behind him as he takes a few shallow breaths. The nagging little voice in the back of his head says you should've ended this a long time ago, Hashimoto. You always knew you'd never be man enough for him, to protect him, to care for him. You're just a coward.

Syobai ignores it, pushes through the pain and walks over to the door of the bedroom he and Mikado have been sharing. Technically, it's Syobai's room, because this is his house, but his sheets smell like Mikado, and it's his and Mikado's clothes on the floor in that room, and there's a picture of both of them hanging on the wall.

Syobai bites his lip so hard he tastes blood, then knocks three times on the door. He contemplates saying something to announce his presence, but finds it better to keep his mouth shut for right now.

At least, until the door opens up, and it's Mikado standing before him, with no mask, his face clearly streaked and stained with tears. Syobai forces himself to look at his face, look him in the eyes, because Mikado deserves that, at least. He deserves so much more than what Syobai's given him.

Neither of them really knows what to say at first. Then Syobai takes a shuddering, shallow breath.

"I'm sorry, for what I said," Syobai finally says. "I said "I can't." That was a lie. I - I can, I just... didn't want to face it."

"I really hope you didn't come all the way here just to say I'm sorry and expect me to forgive you," Mikado says, his voice barely above a whisper.

Syobai shakes his head. "I'm not asking you to forgive me right now," he murmurs. "I just want you to hear me out. Then you can do whatever you want. I swear. Please."

Mikado bites his lip and looks down at the floor, contemplating. "Fine. But I'm not doing this for you."

"That's okay." Syobai closes his eyes for a moment, then looks back evenly at Mikado as he slowly gets to his knees, now looking up at him. Mikado doesn't hide the look of shock on his face as Syobai starts talking.

"Listen. I'm not gonna make excuses. I'm a coward, and I'm a fool. I broke your heart. When things go beyond my intentions, I try to own up to them. Today I ran away instead." He swallows heavily, watches as Mikado shuts his eyes tight. "I - until you told me this morning, I was a man with nothing to lose. Nobody but myself. Then I went from that, to having everything to lose in two words. All my life, I never cared about what happened to anybody but myself. I didn't give a shit. And now..." He looks at Mikado's stomach, where he's resting one of his gloved hands, as though he isn't even thinking about it.

"I realized no matter how far I ran, or for how long, I'd never be able to forget that. I couldn't change it. I can't go back in time and stop what happened." Syobai sighs. Mikado's hands tremble. "The more I thought about it, the more I realized: I don't want to stop what happened. I don't want these kids to not exist."

"Then why did you run away? Why'd you leave me?" Mikado chokes out.

There's no turning back now. Syobai looks at Mikado right in the eyes, grey meeting pale brown, Syobai finally ready to say the words that could make or break him.

"Because I love you, Mikado Sannoji," Syobai says, clearly, sincerely, the only words that have ever come from his mouth with complete purity. "I love you, and it's real and it's raw and it scares the living hell out of me, because I didn't think I could until you walked into my life." He reaches out, fully ready for Mikado to push him away. Instead, he's pleasantly surprised when his cold hands are wrapped in Mikado's warm ones. He hasn't looked away from him, not for a moment, watching as more tears spill down Mikado's face despite him trying to fight them. "I got through life by putting up paywalls, literally, and I knew no person in their right mind would ever wanna get past them." He gives a little laugh. "I didn't count on you, coming in and blowing holes through them."

"Hey, I only blew a hole in a wall once, and that was an accident," Mikado laughs and cries at the same time, his body trembling. By now, Syobai's shaking too, but he's still fighting his own tears.

"Well, you sure got rid of mine," Syobai says. He lifts one of his hands to his lips and kisses his knuckles. "To be honest, I'm still scared. I don't know what I'm doing, not with you, not with the kids we made, not with my life, but I do know one thing: I wanna figure it out with you, and nobody else."

His voice cracks. Syobai swallows heavily, one last ditch-effort attempt at holding back his emotions.

"Will you let me stay here, right here, by your side?" Syobai asks, voice strained. "Will you let me become the man you deserve?" He sniffs, his last words coming in a quiet sob:

"Will you let me be a father?"

Mikado nods, squeezes Syobai's hands, his decision made as soon as he sees the tears -- so very real, undeniable evidence of Syobai bearing his soul to Mikado for the first time -- coming down his face like rain.

"Yeah. Yes, let's do it," Mikado whispers. "Oh, my God. We're gonna be fathers."

Syobai leans forward a little, rests his head against Mikado's belly, presses their still interlocked hands against the small, barely-noticeable swell, evidence that their children are safe, growing, and healthy. He doesn't say a word. He doesn't need to, as he rolls up the bottom of Mikado's shirt and kisses his skin, so gently he's afraid he imagined it at first.

Syobai Hashimoto doesn't so much fall in love with Mikado Sannoji; instead, rather, he stumbles into it, clumsy and foolish and with no grace at all. But he falls in love with their little ones in a split second, a moment in time he'll never forget.

[ryouverua]

Back to the Library

Maki’s smiles are few and far in-between but they always warm my heart <3

Also, ‘Hope Searching’ is growing on me. I know it’s a remix of ‘Despair Searching’, which, in turn, is the DRV3 jazzy version of the two investigation themes from DR1 and SDR2 but I was... maybe... quietly... hoping for a remixed version of ‘Living in a Lazy, Parallel World’. >3> I’M SORRY I KNOW I WON’T SHUT UP ABOUT HOW MUCH I LIKE THAT SONG -

HER RELUCTANT FAITH IN KOKICHI (AND HER STRONGER FAITH IN KAITO) PAID OFF AND I AM ECSTATIC -

I like that she used the term ‘worried’ here, lmao.

.............. Huh. I haven’t thought about the ‘there are no bugs’ question in a while, tbh. Ah, Gonta...

... Oh my god Kokichi took Gonta seriously. Oh my god Kokichi took Gonta seriously, despite Gonta backing down and being self-deprecating and cowed by his classmates not taking him seriously. Oh my god Kokichi respected Gonta’s expertise in his talent and didn’t actually just write him off oh my god -

HOW MANY THINGS DID HE TASK MIU TO MAKE?!

Miu is either super into pastel or super into steampunk when she designs her stuff, man. 8′D

OKAY DAMN THAT’S ACTUALLY REALLY LOUD

That.... has to be important, though. The absence of something that should be there is just as important as them catching something. Right??? And the game is clearly telling us that it’s an important clue - also, hell, the fact that Kokichi latched onto this strongly enough to commission Miu to make something alongside the hammers and the electrobombs means something!

“I spent time trusting in Kokichi’s good will and I’m trying to get back in your good graces so appreciate this and validate my efforts, damn it.” tsun

Well apparently it’s important enough to warrant a truth bullet...

AAAAAAAW

Oh god, can you imagine if part of the building collapses here before Himiko got to the room and killed Shuichi, Maki and Tsumugi? Ffff that would be so damn awful -

I JUST COMPLETELY LOST MY SHIT THAT COMEDIC TIMING WAS ON POINT -

oh

oh fuck

LMAO WHELP

K1-B0 CAN I PLEAD FOR MERCY OR -

....... is that a no -

don’t tell me what to do, game.

LMAO WHELP HIMIKO AT LEAST WE WENT OUT TOGETHER

anyway RECORD SCRATCH, REWIND, plz don’t kill me again k1-b0 I can’t help the fact that I love fluff text -

Am I losing my mind or is this the second strong Ace Attorney: Spirit of Justice reference they’ve made???

“Also it’s stuff like this that led you to being blown up a moment ago. Please prioritize.” never

DUDE WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT LOOK YOU LITERALLY JUST GAVE US

is this what happens when you get blown up

you switch timelines and now everyone’s mad at you for no reason

??? Where did this reaction come from??? I-I feel like I’m missing something here?! Why would we get mad at you for this?

E... Every time I think I’ve come to grips with Himiko’s character, she says something that throws me for a loop...

MAKI NO -

If I’m still going with the necklace theory, maybe that’s the only one he had? I mean, it would make sense - if it’s from Monokuma, he would only make one copy of it. I was just assuming because it was part of his outfit that Rantaro would have multiple, but maybe that assumption itself is wrong - because it’s not part of his ‘official’ outfit, there’s no need for copies of it like everything else (shirt, pants, etc). He just has the one soldier tag, as his ‘perk’.

....... Or I could be completely wrong. That’s on the table too - it always is. 8′D

.... Kokichi...? He can lockpick and he did have a clear interest in Rantaro - but I feel like Maki would have come across it if so? it’s buried under all the clutter, dear god K1-b0 give us more time do you know how hard it is to go through a hoarder’s things?!

Also, also! I’m enjoying working in tandem with Shuichi. It feels like we’re both coming up with ideas independent of one another, as opposed to me being leaps ahead - his ideas are prompting my own. And honestly, that’s how it should be with our detective character!

TSUMUGI WHY ARE YOU SO EAGER I AM LITERALLY THE MOST SUSPICIOUS OF YOU

YOU SHOULD BE THE WARIEST ONE OF ALL OF US

T A N T E I    I N T E N S I F I E S

M-MAKI I’D SAY YOU’RE KILLING ME HERE BUT I’D BE AFRAID OF YOU TAKING ME SERIOUSLY

we.... we LITERALLY have talked about this. TALK FIRST. SEARCH FIRST. THINK FIRST, NO KILLING.

“Maki why do we need to keep having this discussion -”

oH MY GOD TSUMUGI SCREAMED AND IT SCARED THE HELL OUT OF ME

Oh. Great.

I FEEL LIKE THAT DEFEATS THE PURPOSE OF CONTINUING THE KILLING GAME -

SWEETCHEEKS THE K1-B0 GUN -

!!!!!!!!

asd;klfj k1-b0 holy fuck

.... I... I’m not even joking when I say that I so badly, so desperately wish I could see Kokichi’s reaction to the new K1-b0. Miu’s reaction to the new K1-b0 oh god the kiiruma vibes would be real. JUST. I WANT IT SO BADLY. DAMN IT.

A K1-b0 who doesn’t even look at his enemy after taking him down, who seems infinitely more sure of himself but so much more extreme, who still does care for his classmates in an abstract sense but has become so much more cold.... I, I just can’t help but wonder. Is this the real K1-b0?

Damn, he just doesn’t care at all anymore. It’s all about direct action now. No time for play, no time to talk. I hate to see it, but it’s very... robotic of you. Of course, that might just be what we need right now...

Like??? He does care for their safety in this situation??? But he also is clearly willing to blow up the building with them in it, as clearly shown in the fact that SWEETCHEEKS WAS LITERALLY BLOWN UP FOR TAKING TOO LONG IN HIS INVESTIGATION AND K1-B0 DIDN’T EVEN TRY TO EVACUATE THEM -

wHAT IS THE TRUTH

before K1-b0

after K1-b0

like if you think both pictures are equally beautiful

I’d like to think that there’s nothing left to attack us? All the exisals are on the outside and the Monokubs, too - we also haven’t seen any copies of Monokuma lying about. lmao at it being Tsumugi being worried about going in there now btw

MAKI JUST... STRIKE BACK NON-LETHALLY, OKAY -

I-If you’re in here protecting us while we explore the hidden room, you won’t blow up the school if dawn happens to reach us first, right

because that would defeat the purpose, right

RIGHT - ?!

K1-B0 I DON’T LIKE THIS SILENCE -

also:

literally clicks on Maki, she immediately gets defensive about having the ‘no killing’ talk for the 15th time this chapter pff

I, erm, would like your definition of ‘revenge’ though. I feel like that’s important.

8′)))))

god right in the kaito

GOD EVERY TIME YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT, I GET LESS SURE ABOUT MY SUSPICIONS TOWARD YOU... BUT............... uuuurughghugh

Okay, that’s fair. Just, you know. Remember. No killing. Nonlethal wounds only. Maybe stick to knives - crossbows seem a little bit ‘too soon’, considering.

Ah Kaede, if only you were here to see us now. 8′\

[danganronpa-21]

Chapter 1: Meet the Naegi-Kirigiris

Chapter 1: Meet the Naegi-Kirigiris

TRACK: DRtA OST 1-16: Buzzkill (The Animation) My mother had heard the Reaper's footsteps too late this time.

She was halfway through calling out my father's name when the sound of a gunshot exploded through the school's auditorium. 

It seemed almost the instant that the sound went off, he crumpled to the floor like a doll. Students screamed and cried out, ducking for safety and others ordering for someone to call an ambulance. None of them moved to help, they all just stood there and panicked. All that anyone could seem to do was think about themselves, despite the fact that the wound had been inflicted upon someone else. At least, that was what it looked like, judging by all of the people standing and crying. The population willing to help was scarce, and it seemed like everyone else was just looking for an exit. If it weren't for my family, nobody would even be making an effort at all.

“They shot him.” Natsumi's terrified voice filled my ears as I felt her latch on to my arm. The sound of it was so uncharacteristic that for a moment I believed that I must have been dreaming. “Oh my god Koichi, they actually shot him!” I couldn't move. My whole body was trembling as the reality of the situation began to set in. I could feel tears blur my vision and threaten to spill down my cheeks as I stared forward at the collapsed body of my father on the stage. I felt almost as if I was going to be sick, right then and there. I had not even the strength to scream or cry out like everyone else. All I could do was stand there and watch as my mother sprinted to my father screaming out his name in desperation, tears making their way down even her face.

“Makoto!” Her voice was shaking so badly as she tried to get him to react. She kept jostling his arm in hopes of getting a response. “Makoto! Makoto! Please, Makoto!” I couldn't stop myself from clenching my fists as I listened to her beg for him to force his eyes open. The pain they both must have felt in that moment... I couldn't possibly imagine it. This was the first time anyone aside from my father had seen my mother cry so openly. Her sobbing was hysterical as she ripped her gloves off her hands and pressed two fingers to Dad's neck. She was looking for a pulse. After all, if he wasn't able to show any signs of life himself, she would need to see if there was still something. “There's a pulse, faint, but it's there! His heart's still beating!” She announced through her sobs, taking this opportunity to move his head so he could breathe better. It was all she could really do for him as she continued to plead. “Come on, Makoto, stay with me... Don't worry, baby, I'm right here..."

[From what I could see, this did not really provide him with much comfort at all. In fact, I wasn't sure that he even had any idea why he was lying on the ground anyway. He seemed to only stare up at her with half-lidded eyes, confusion and concern present on his face. For a moment I saw him move his hand up as if to touch his forehead, but my mother quickly swatted it away and told him to just leave it alone. By then I was sure he could probably feel the blood trickling down his face.

"S-Somebody, call for help!" My sister cried from just behind my mother, glancing around the auditorium. "Hurry, we don't have much time!" “The ambulance is on their way, everyone just stay calm!” It was my honorary uncle, Byakuya, who spoke next. He was clutching his cell phone so tightly in his hand that his knuckles had turned white. The students looked skeptical, worried that the attacker might come back for them, but I knew that wouldn't be an issue. There was only one person it could have been, and I saw them rush out of the auditorium moments after the wound was inflicted. ●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

TRACK: SDR2 OST -1-06- Beautiful Days [Summer Salt]

It seems whenever I meet people who recognize my last names, they always ask me the same question. “So what's it like being the son of Makoto Naegi and Kyoko Kirigiri?” I mean, they're always expecting me to dish out something about how magical it is being the son of two heroes, but it's not really like that at all. I mean, sure, my parents are probably cool. I just have no idea because I can't see them anything else other than Mom and Dad- the people who brought me in to this world and the people who put up with all of my crap for fourteen years. To me, they're always going to be Mom and Dad. But to everybody else, they're TV stars, legends, or heroes. They're the apple of the public's eye, Japan's most beloved couple, yadda yadda yadda, dumb talk show stuff. They expect to everything and anything about my parents to be glamorous and awesome, and by extension this means most people expect my life to be glamorous and awesome.

I won't lie to you- I am pretty fortunate. I've had a really great life. I've got a roof over my head, food on the table, and a family who loves me dearly. Anything one could really ask for has pretty much been mine throughout my fourteen years of life. But that doesn't necessarily mean that everything about me and my family is the most glorious thing of all. When it comes down to it, my family is not as exciting as those tabloids make us seem. In fact, we're your typical Japanese family... well, as typical as you can get these days, anyway.

Which leads me in to the truth of being their son, and conveniently, the story I'm trying to tell.

I'd say that one of the best things about being Makoto Naegi and Kyoko Kirigiri's son is waking up to find out that your mother is standing over your bed, watching you sleep. 

If you haven't guessed by now, when I said best, I meant terrifying. Of course, Mom doesn't see it that way, but what can you really do?

“Gaaaaaah!” was the closest estimate I'm going to make to what my shriek must have sounded like when I opened my eyes to see my mother looming over the side of my bed. I'm sure on the inside my scream must have scared her half to death, but thanks to the iron mask she'd learned through detective work, she appeared mostly unruffled.

“Oh, s-sorry, Koichi.” Her voice was soft as she spoke to me, her iron mask fading away as she offered me a gentle smile. “I didn't mean to scare you.”

“What were you doing?!” I asked, looking up at her like she was crazy. Aside from her, can you think of any person who deems it normal to watch other people sleep? It's just downright creepy!

 “I came up to tell you that dinner's ready, but when I got upstairs I noticed you were asleep. I was somewhat torn between waking you up and allowing you to continue to rest. You looked so peaceful, and very much like your father.” She answered meekly, tapping her fingers together in a manner that reminded me of my honorary aunt Toko. "You were so cute, I didn't have the heart to wake you."

“I struggle to think of a time where I do not look like Dad,” I replied flatly. Between me and my two sisters, I was the one who looked most like him. We had the same olive green eyes, same light brown hair, same tanned complexion, nearly the same height, and the same button nose and soft cheeks that made us look younger than we were. Pretty much like my parents had tried to clone my dad and it had come out almost perfect. It wasn't uncommon for people to comment on how much we looked alike- especially Mom. You can imagine her joy when I popped out looking just like Dad.

“I suppose that's true. You two make all of the same faces, after all." She laughed softly, offering me her hand so I could more easily climb out of my bed. Judging by the book laying on my chest, I must have fallen asleep while reading again. "Speaking of which, be sure to thank Hope when you get downstairs because I almost had to make dinner tonight. You and your father would be making the same disgusted faces all night if she hadn't.”

As I accepted my mother's assistance, I couldn't help but smile slightly sheepishly. Don't get me wrong, I love Mom to the moon and back, but her cooking is awful. At our house, it fell on Dad to do most of the cooking and baking. Not that he minded, much, but days where Dad had meetings were a nightmare if Hope didn't step in. Mom was... infamous for giving people food poisoning with her cooking. So usually it was best if she just left everything up to Dad and my older sister.

Thankfully, today she'd taken it upon herself to cook for the family as Dad had a meeting to attend. I still think it's kind of silly that they have to have a meeting when school hasn't even started yet, but what do I know? At the very least, the spring meeting meant that Hope would be able to cook. During the school year she tended to get caught up with the Student Council or the cheerleading team, so if she wasn't available for dinner and neither was Dad, we either ordered in or it fell on me to make dinner. Those are the problems with having an overachiever for a sister, I guess.  

“That's... probably true. Although I don't imagine it will taste very good when it's cold. We should get headed downstairs.” I replied, laughing slightly. My mother simply smiled back at me before leading me downstairs to greet my sisters who were putting out the plates and utensils so we could begin.

“Ichi, did you fall asleep again?” I heard my youngest sister call to me from the dinner table, trying to hide the fact that she was giggling. "It's not good to take so many naps, you won't be able to sleep at night!"

I couldn’t help but smile at her. As I mentioned before, Seiko is my youngest sister. She is a whopping six years younger than me, standing at eight years old. She's straight up half my other sister's age! To answer your question, no, my parents did not plan to have her. But it's a darn good thing they did because she is the cutest kid. Even when she was scolding you, you couldn't resist those big violet eyes and chubby cheeks.

“Yeah, I fell asleep again.” I laughed as Mom and I wandered in to the room, knowing it would humour her. “I guess I need to improve my sleeping schedule.”

“It probably would have been best to start improving it a week ago, Koichi.” Mom scolded me, shaking her head as she placed her hands on her hips. “We'd prefer it if you did not fall asleep during your first day at Hope’s Peak.” “Yeah, you certainly wouldn’t want to end up in the Headmaster’s office,” Hope teased, knowing full well what being sent to the Headmaster’s office would mean for me. At most, a lecture, but still never particularly pleasant. I’d honestly rather be in class, if I were to be perfectly honest. After all, I had worked my butt off just to get in to that school. That’s what happens when you discover you have to take the entrance exams last minute. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not bitter with my parents because I didn’t get in. It wasn’t their fault that it happened. In fact they were trying pretty hard to help me, but in the end it was the other staff members that pushed for the other student to be admitted. I had to study for weeks just to pass the entrance exams, and now that I’d gotten my chance I knew I couldn’t let it slip away. So perhaps landing myself in my father's office on the first day was not exactly my greatest ambition during this new school life of mine.

 "Okay, okay, let's just sit down and eat. Seiko looks like she's starving." I prodded softly, pulling out a chair for my mother to sit down in before promptly taking my own seat. (My mother raised a gentleman.) Putting our hands together, we all closed our eyes and began the before-meal ritual that all Japanese families do. Why? What can I say, we're pretty normal. Nothing awesome or glamorous about normal people, is what they used to say.

 "Itadakimasu!"

 We began our meal quite happily, my mother passing around food dishes to my sisters and I to make sure we could all get our fill first before she got her own. Dinner that night was salmon alongside white rice, with a topping of seaweed and sautéed vegetables. For beverages we went with cold barley tea considering it fit so perfectly with the warm spring we were having. Just sitting in front of the food had made me understand why my youngest sister had looked so hungry while my mother and older sister were teasing me. The whole thing smelled and looked delicious, and considering we were already eating dinner late, it was hard to hold off from wanting a taste. Simple or not, the meal looked *so good*.

 "Do you want me to make a plate for Dad?" Hope inquired as she helped Seiko scoop some rice on to her plate. Seiko was definitely old enough to do that sort of thing on her own, but she's the baby of the family so she usually gets extra help no matter what she's capable of.

 "No thank you, you just sit down and enjoy your food. I have no idea when your father will be home, and when he does get home, I can make a plate for him. You have done quite enough, Hope. Thank you." Mom responded with a smile, knowing that any minute now Dad would likely be home. It wasn't like him to carry meetings through dinner- in all honesty he hated carrying meetings any longer than they had to go, but with the first day of school just around the corner, he might have had to stay longer.

 "So, Koichi, you excited about tomorrow or what?" Hope asked me cheerfully, her eyes sparkling with delight as she scooped some rice on to her own plate this time. "It'll be your first day, after all. It's a pretty big deal!"

 "Uh... I dunno, I guess I am. I mean, I know Hope's Peak like the back of my hand, really..." was all I felt I could offer my sister as she passed the rice off to me, "Part of me feels like it won't be too daunting. Maybe back in the day, when the school consisted solely of ultimates, but... Now it's a little bit different."

 "I'm glad to hear you're at ease, Koichi," Mom told me softly, the same pleased expression reigning on her face. "I wouldn't want you to worry too much about it. Everyone at Hope's Peak will take good care of you, obviously including your father, your sister, and myself."

 "I'm so jealous that you get to go to Hope's Peak now! I wish I was going," Seiko commented, putting on a totally fake pout. "But instead I have to go to my stupid school, where they keep telling me that being a detective is no hobby for a young lady..."

 "Don't you listen to them, Seiko. I used to get told just the same thing when I was a girl, and now look at me. We've got a Super High School Level Detective title ready for you, so I wouldn't advise giving up!"

 Seiko's pout transitioned in to a smile as she looked up on Mom. It was comforting to see the way my mother supported my sister and pushed her along, the same way she did with Hope and I. I could still distinctly remember studying for the entrance exams with her, pushing me to just do a little bit more as she was sure that I would be able to do it. It's interesting, I think, how much a mother's love can make you feel as if you can do anything. I'm grateful to have always had that in my life. Sometimes I think it's because my mother didn't really get to have that in her life that brings her to try so hard to take care of us. After all, she hadn't been intending to have three kids but she met my father and suddenly things were different. She used to tell us how she never saw herself getting married or being a mother, not until she met him. When she would say that, I used to wonder if that was how it could be with other things, too. You could never see yourself as one thing until the right people came along.

It wasn't that I thought that perhaps each human needs another person to complete them, but perhaps everybody needs somebody to love and support them, whether it be romantically or platonically. As humans we all need somebody to push us to be our best, and for Mom that person was Dad. Dad would tell you that for him, that person was Mom. The two of them were yin and yang almost, starting off as best friends and blossoming in to lovers. I couldn't help but wonder if maybe someday I'd find somebody like that.

 I guess that was part of the appeal of Hope's Peak. Just the idea of someday finding people, my people, who would care for me and encourage me to do my best. People beyond the confines of my bloodline and my not-technically-family, people who chose to be with me. My number one goal in going to Hope's Peak was finding those people. If it had happened to my parents when they were young, why not to me?

 For my sisters and I, Hope's Peak was always a symbol of promise and hope for the future. That's why I felt relatively at ease, because I knew that no matter what happened, there would always be hope. That was pretty much an age old lesson in my house, and one that-

 "Koichi? Are you alright?"

 Oh, gosh. I got so absorbed in my thoughts I had clearly missed an integral part of the conversation that we had been having. I tried not to look like I had totally just spaced out, but by that point it was relatively obvious.

 "H-huh? Oh! Yeah, I'm good." I responded awkwardly, glancing over at my mother who was staring at me with a raised eyebrow. Was I making a weird face while I was zoned out, or something?

 "Are you certain? Your father just tried to greet you and you didn't say a word."

 "What?" I asked, turning towards the doorway to the kitchen. What Mom said was in fact true, Dad had since returned home from work and I was too zoned out to even notice that he'd come through the door. Let alone realize he had been speaking to me, jeez! "Oh, hi Dad..." I greeted him awkwardly, feeling my cheeks flush softly.

 "Hi Koichi. Got a lot on the mind today?" He snickered softly, still forgiving as ever.

 "You don't know the half of it... Big day tomorrow, as you know."

 "I think you'll find I understand a little more than you think I do. But yep, it'll definitely be a big day. Exciting for sure, unlike that last meeting, ugh." He sighed, pushing a hand through his light brown hair. I could tell just by the look on his face that it really was that boring as his expression resembled that of the one he has when he's just waking up. I could only pray that he hadn't fallen asleep during that last meeting, considering it had been with the school board. They'd already almost removed him from the position of headmaster once, so sleeping in a meeting would definitely screw with their perception of his professionalism.

 "Not a good one?" My mother inquired, tilting her head to signal that he should come sit down and eat.

 "I think that was the worst one yet. I very nearly fell asleep, as you weren't there to pinch me every time I started to nod off..." He admitted with a laugh, moving to kiss the side of Hope's head and thank her for making dinner.

She merely murmured her answer as Dad went around and kissed Seiko's head, then mine, and then of course Mom's. The second he did that, she was cracking a smile again. Probably the biggest one I'd seen from her all day.

 "Well, I'm certainly glad I wasn't there, then."

 "Yeah, you probably should be. But at least we're all here together now, and we have some delicious food to eat prepared lovingly by a beautiful young woman whom we all love." Dad teased, making Hope giggle softly as he took his seat across from Mom. "And, of course, we can make a toast with our tea to Koichi's big day tomorrow."

 "Agreed," Mom added, raising her teacup to prepare to clink it against ours. We all began to mimic her, going around the table and clinking our glasses together before taking a sip of the tea.

 "To Koichi's big day!" Dad announced proudly, a phrase that we all repeated after him as he raised his cup in the air triumphantly.

To me, my parents are still my parents. They probably will never be "cool" in my eyes, but I don't think that being cool is all that's important when it comes to them. If there was ever really a way to say that my parents are cool, it would be to say that they're cool because they're loving. They're cool because they're supportive. They're cool because I know they've always got my back if I need them. Sure, the whole fighting against despair thing is pretty cool in itself, but it's that kind of love I feel that best defines being their son.

[midorimochi]

@stardustdandere True, leaving matters opened to interpretation can inspire fanwriters to come up with potential ideas and to work and to play with alternative possibilities which is a very good device to experiment with your own creativity and the main appeal of writing fanfics in general but it’s also the reason why, in my opinion at least, Zero Escape hasn’t had as much “echo” as DR. 

If you think about it, ZE already explores all the possible alternatives by itself and when you don’t leave much room for interpretation perhaps the response lacks in a certain sense, but I may be wrong...

And yeah, in this case, is a bit frustrating because to me, it felt like this ending didn’t give me a proper enclosure on the story, it did leave the door opened to interpretation but perhaps it’a bit too opened.

I think they decided to leave it at this because maybe the player could feel a certain sense of “worthlessness” after the gameplay, like, “Why did I take my time to get to know people that weren’t who I thought they were? If the ones I got to know weren’t really them, who were they?” it’s like the game itself lied to us.

Which yeah, objectively it fits with the “lie vs truth” theme but I understand why so many players felt “cheated” by this game, I remember having read stuff like “They aren’t even themselves, what’s the point?” but I appreciated the parallel with SDR2, like, both the SDR2 and NDRV3 casts did everything themselves, so both casts are kinda grey (and no, I refuse to accept the brainwashing bullshit DR3 pulled, Enoshima said she manipulated them one by one and I stand by it, they wanted to revive their leader sacrificing themselves in the Killing Game, fuck zetsubou-hen lol)

“I was embracing death because I wanted to join Kaito in the afterlife”.

I THOUGHT THE SAME THING!!!

Maki also probably wanted to join her idiot, that’s why she offered to sacrifice herself ;-; (but I think she also genuinely wanted to save Shuichi too, I know people were upset at how much Kaito influenced her “I wish her character arc revolved less around Kaito and her maiden love for him” but in Chapter 6 I had the impression she became very affectionate towards Shuichi too and she wasn’t in love with him... What about “I’ll do my best so all of you will be able to accept me one day”? What the actual fuck, it’s not like Maki isn’t capable of thinking with her own head, for fuck’s sake, and TO BE FAIR they pulled the “You changed so much thanks to Kaito” with Shuichi too, c’mon...)

@rockingmusician What do you mean? Sorry, what doesn’t match up? (I’m dumb). 

Yeah, the allergy thing was kind of bullshit but since they did really and unironically use it in a trial to prove her innocence I was kinda confused and I had no idea on how that could fit. 

If she can’t “cosplay” real people then, the NDRV3 cast is real but she can cosplay DR and SDR2 casts, so they’re fictional... I don’t know, I was trying to understand what was true and wasn’t, help :c

@kimmysfandomblog Yes, Shuichi also suggests that perhaps HPA and the Remnants of Despair really existed, unlike Tsumugi said and the fact that before the game finished they kept on showing CGs from the previous games it’s also worth noting in my opinion. And yes, I though of it too, if the world truly ended then, there wouldn’t be an audience to watch DR 53 but objectively we’ve never been told who these people were, so what if they weren’t humans but aliens? LOL

While Shuichi, Maki and Himiko were talking about it I thought, “Hey, open a new trial to clarify it!”. I’m not sure HPA was indeed fictional, but I’m not sure it was real either, damn! 

And yes, if they participated in the show out of their own volition but their memories got deleted, than objectively they have been kidnapped and they’ve been playing the Game against their own will so I guess that their memories got deleted despite their own will to take part in the show to increase the suspence? 

Was induced amnesia even part of the contract in the first place? I guess they must have signed a contract to join DR if it was a reality show, right? But if they were willing to kill and to risk their lives for the thrill of it, than amnesia wasn’t much for them... And yup, I feel the ending wasn’t complete, I’m okay with opened endings but this was left too much things “opened” to me as well. 

[oumakokichi]

fave dr ships and why?? :0

Hmm, that’s a pretty fun question! There are so many fun character interactions in each game that there’s a lot of ships I really like, so I’ll try to briefly just touch on some of my favorites in each game!

There aren’t really any spoilers in my reply, but I’m going to include a read-more anyway because even trying to keep it brief, there were a lot of ships to cover, so it still got pretty long.

In dr1, I honestly really love naegiri. Naegi gets a lot of flack for “not being interesting enough” or “not bringing anything to the table,” but I think he worked really well as the protagonist for the first installment of the series, and I absolutely think he and Kirigiri have a lot of great chemistry. Kirigiri and Naegi’s relationship is all about finding a balance between doubt and belief, and both of them really help each other grow as people. I think their dynamic is at its best in the first game, since Kirigiri gets so much time to shine and really feels more like the deuteragonist of the series than anyone else. Plus watching Naegi try to learn how to read her stoic façade when she’s really quite emotional under the  surface is so much fun.

I’m also a huge fan of aoisakura. I love everything about their interaction, and chapter 4 of dr1 is still one of the best in the whole series in my opinion. Both of them care so much about each other even from early on, and Aoi’s anger at how the others treat Sakura or talk about her like she’s hardly even a person comes across as so legitimate. It’s such a great and largely underrated ship, so I always love to see it.

I also have to say that I like kirizono quite a lot! They don’t have much in the way of interaction in canon, considering how early Maizono dies, but it’s one of those ships where I’m much more interested in the overall potential. Kirigiri seems to have a very good grasp of what Maizono was actually like as a person and what she might have been thinking in her final moments. While she uncovers the truth of the events of chapter 1, she doesn’t see Maizono as irredeemable for tricking Naegi, but merely as someone who was scared and who ultimately couldn’t go through with her own plan. She knew that Maizono was trying to help Naegi in her own way by leaving him a dying message, and I would have loved to see a detective-and-assistant duo with Kirigiri and Maizono in some alternate universe.

Other ships from dr1 that I enjoy even if I’m not super invested in them from an analysis standpoint are celesgiri (how could I not ship the original liar and detective), naekusaba (DR IF really sold me on this one), ishimondo (all around a solid, great ship), and naegami (honestly I just think the idea of Kirigiri and Togami both dating Naegi but barely tolerating each other as friends is really funny).

Sdr2 is probably the game where I wound up the least invested in shipping, but there are still a few that I like!

Hinanami isn’t quite as appealing to me as naegiri, mostly due to Nanami being used twice for Hinata’s character development, but they have some really cute moments that I do enjoy a lot, and I really love any interaction between the two of them as gamer friends. Nanami is so much more mischievous than most people give her credit for; I still can’t help remembering when I replayed sdr2 a year or two ago and got to the part with her threatening to poke Hinata’s eyes out during an investigation, and I nearly lost my shit because I didn’t remember it at all from previous playthroughs.

I’m not quite as invested in komahina as I thought I would be when I first got into DR, but I definitely don’t mind it either! I think Komaeda’s feelings for Hinata are pretty textual and undeniable; lines like “I’m in love with the hope that’s sleeping inside you” are impossible, in my opinion, to handwave as “just a friend thing,” and Megumi Ogata has all but stated outright that her character song for Komaeda is specifically about Hinata.

Of course, I definitely think Komaeda would need to work on a lot of his internalized ideas about talent and self-worth, and that he and Hinata would have to start as friends first before carrying their relationship into anything romantic, but if their really cute interation in ndrv3’s talent development plan is anything to go off of, I think Hinata definitely does want to help Komaeda value himself more and wants to be friends with him.

As for other ships that I enjoy more casually, I like twobuki (if that’s even what people are still calling Twogami/Impostor and Ibuki as a ship), sondam (all of Sonia’s nerding out about Gundam’s chuunibyou interests is honestly super adorable), nanamiki (I feel like Nanami and Mikan could honestly have a cute dynamic if Mikan weren’t under Junko’s influence), and… I actually have no idea for this ship name, but Impostor/Hinata is really sweet. This is more related to dr3, but one of the few things I did come out feeling positively about was Impostor/Mitarai, despite everything else about how the story turned out.

Finally, there’s ndrv3! There’s quite a lot of ships I really love here, so it’s actually a little hard to narrow it down.

I hardly think I need to mention saiouma at this point, since it’s the ship I talk about the most on this blog, but it’s still my favorite ship from pretty much anything ever. I love their dynamic so much: the way they both embody the themes of “truth” and “lies” within the game respectively, the way they constantly want to know more about each other while being afraid to open up or trust each other completely, and the fact that they so perfectly manage to capture the chase of the “phantom thief vs. detective” trope to the point that it was even lampshaded in Ouma’s love hotel... all of these things just make it so much fun.

It’s another ship where I just love thinking about the potential, whether in an AU where Ouma might have lived or else where the killing game never took place at all. I honestly really love ships that deal with a lot of slow-burn and both characters thinking their affections are unrequited when it turns out they’re actually both just idiots with a bad case of pining. I also really love the fact that, in my opinion, it’s a ship where Saihara would have to really take the initiative in the end—otherwise, Ouma is just going to keep trying to run away every time he drops an “I love you,” or “you’re my favorite.”

I also really, really love himiten. It’s a ship that gets a lot more flack than it deserves, in my opinion, and it’s sad to see that it’s a little underappreciated these days. There are flaws and problems within the ship, of course, but these are things that are actually addressed within the game itself. Himiko’s apathy and disregard towards Tenko’s feelings is called out pretty bluntly in the later parts of chapter 3, and she winds up mourning Tenko’s death and taking her last advice to heart more than anyone else.

Meanwhile, while Tenko certainly meant well and always had Himiko’s best interests at heart, it’s true that she came across as somewhat condescending sometimes (albeit unintentionally) by treating Himiko like a cute animal instead of a person.  I think that she understood Himiko’s feelings a lot better by chapter 3, which is why she prioritized trying to let Himiko talk to Angie one more time despite her own misgivings about Angie. Tenko grew a lot more as a character than a lot of people give her credit for, and I would have loved to see any post-game scenario where Himiko and Tenko could’ve finally started a relationship on equal footing outside of the game.

I actually have two entire ships for Miu that I am equally fond of. Both kiiruma and irumatsu are really great in my opinion, in totally different ways. The sheer chaotic potential of kiiruma gets overlooked a lot of times, I think, but both of them are complete disasters. They have so much fun together and it really shows, both in canon and in the talent development plan as well. Kiibo is so wonderful and I love him so much, because you’d think he’d be the voice of reason as a “cold, logical robot”—but honestly, he’s just as messed-up and over the top as Miu. I mean, he did photograph her poop on what turned out to be a live audience national broadcast and he didn’t see anything wrong with this.

Kiibo is one of the few characters who vocally talks about missing Miu after her death in chapter 4, and he repeatedly tells her how much he appreciates her maintenance work on him both in canon and in one of their talent development scenes. In one such scene, he even mentions wanting to continue their ongoing relationship after they graduate, which I think is surprisingly sweet and adorable for the two of them. Honestly, Miu is about as wild as a DR character ever gets, and I love the idea of her and Kiibo just having fun with each other.

Meanwhile, Kaede and Miu’s dynamic is a lot more back-and-forth. Kaede spends a good part of her FTEs absolutely frustrated and fed up with Miu, but also decidedly worried for her well-being and wondering how she might get her to be more of a team player. She’s not afraid to put her foot down when Miu crosses the line, but she’s also one of the few people who’s ever been willing to stand by Miu and encourage her or actually be her friend in spite of how awful Miu is at interacting with others.

Even in the talent development plan, Kaede’s often seen together with Miu a lot, which I think is super cute and confirms that even at Hope’s Peak, she’d still be trying to make sure Miu had a friend around. And she was able to tell that, despite what a disaster Miu’s idea with the Christmas lights was, it was Miu’s own way of trying to add to the festivities and do something nice for other people. All in all, it’s one of my favorite wlw DR ships, and I really love when fanworks capture just how shy or flustered Miu got around Kaede sometimes.

Of course, I like momoharu a lot as well! It’s one of the ships that has grown on me quite a bit in my absence, mostly just because despite all of Momota’s flaws, he really does want Maki to love herself first and foremost. Maki’s own feelings for Momota are so important to her character growth and really represent her feeling as though she’s finally made a choice for the first time in her life, and it’s really heartwarming to see. Also, any ship where the girl could lift a guy up with one arm without breaking a sweat is a pretty good ship in my opinion.

As for other ndrv3 ships that I enjoy a lot, there’s saihoshi (Hoshi is extremely underrated as a character, and I adore how sweet his FTEs and salmon mode with Saihara were; it’s also another ship where I feel Saihara would have to really take the initiative to make Hoshi fully open up, which I like), amamatsu (Kaede and Amami had a lot of really funny, great interaction in chapter 1 and some fun banter in their FTEs, so I would’ve loved to see more of it), and harumatsu/kaemaki (again, they have a lot of potential and it would have been extremely interesting to see them interact more).

I also like saiibo, not so much in the way that most people ship it (their love hotel is cute, don’t get me wrong!), but mostly because Kiibo’s FTEs are the funniest set of FTEs in the whole game in my opinion, and the twist where they were both looking down on each other without the other one knowing just made my jaw drop before I started laughing my ass off. They’re almost as much of a disaster together as Kiibo and Miu are, and I think the humor in their dynamic sometimes gets overlooked.

There are even more ships that I like, and I could keep going on and on, but I should probably leave things off here. Character interactions are so much fun in DR, both because of the genuine growth and character development from a lot of the cast, but also because so many of them are so whacky and borderline cartoonish that it’s just really fun imagining further interactions between them. Thank you for the fun ask, anon!

[all-my-novels]

Iris. [SDRA2 Sannohashi oneshot]

read on ao3 here if you please

plot:

and i don’t want the world to see me ‘cause i don’t think that they’d understand when everything’s made to be broken i just want you to know who i am.

syobai hashimoto has to fix the biggest mistake he’s ever made in his life. mikado sannoji has to deal with what syobai leaves behind when he runs away. it was never supposed to go this far.

syobai-focused sannohashi, set in the “nuclear” AU. more explained inside. featuring trans!mikado and sora/syobai friendship. tw for mentions of suicide attempt in the beginning.

notes:

So to make a long story short, this series takes place after a huge nuclear war decimated half of the human population and fucked up a lot of shit with the environment and people’s bodies. Everybody knows shit’s fucked. The SDRA2 kids exist in the same universe as the rest of the canon Ultimates, and everyone’s around the same age (THH and NDRV3 kids are about 22, SDR2 kids are 23, SDRA2 kids are around 20-21). So everyone’s an adult. Don’t come for my throat. Don’t like it, don’t leave a nasty comment, thanks! Bad and stinky comments will be placed inside the bee oven to atone for their sins.

It’s not often that Syobai admits this, but this time, he’s absolutely, completely, royally, fucked up. Badly. And normally he doesn’t care, but this time is so very different. Sitting at a table in a nearly-empty diner at half-past noon is not where he thought he was gonna end up today, but here he is, with his head in his hands, staring down at his phone’s lock screen, counting the minutes since Sora sent her “omw" text.

This diner serves whiskey. A lot of places serve liquor now, have since the war tore the world apart and left millions of traumatized people to deal with the aftermath, many of them turning to alcohol to cope. Syobai has been drinking since the ripe old age of ten, so that’s not new to him, and the whiskey they have here is strong, and it’s tempting.

It’s so, so tempting. But if he does that, it won’t end very well for him; first of all, Sora would likely – definitely – beat his ass into next week if she shows up and finds him drunk. Second, in the state he’s currently in emotionally, if he gets drunk, all he’s going to do is remember things, and when he remembers things, he ends up waking up on the bathroom floor at 3 AM in a puddle of his own tears with a bottle of pain pills in his hand.

So Syobai won’t drink. Not today, anyway. But God damn, does he really want to smoke.

As soon as he starts to get up to go outside (the diner has a no smoking policy, which he thinks is stupid considering the fact that nuclear warfare has done shit to the air they don’t even know about yet, but he’s not willing to get kicked out and risk a beating by Sora yet again), the universe interferes with his life once more. Sora steps in through the door of the diner.

Well there goes that plan.

She spots him fairly quickly and strides over to the booth in the back corner, sliding into the seat like nothing’s changed. Syobai remembers when they’d used to skip class every Wednesday and go down to the diner down the street from Hope’s Peak, the one that served all the crazy Western food, and dare each other to eat the craziest shit on the menu as fast as they could without puking or choking. Sora, of course, would win every time, and "claim her victory for all of the lesbians out there.”

It’s enough to make him smile a little bit. The diner was abandoned when the war started, but they still hang out there sometimes.

“So, you wanna tell me what’s wrong with you?”

Sora’s voice breaks through his thoughts, and Syobai lifts his head to look at her. She’s got her chin in her hand, and her elbow propped on the table.

“Elbows on the table? Not very lady-like,” Syobai jokes. With her free hand, Sora flips him off, and he snickers. “I’m kidding, geez. Who says there’s anything wrong with me?”

Sora points at the complimentary basket of chips the diner serves with every customer. “There’s food on the table, and you haven’t eaten it all yet to spite me. Now, I asked you nicely. Don’t make me come over there.”

Well. Looks like he can’t stall his explanation anymore.

He lets out a long, heavy, slow sigh, and laces his fingers together in front of him on the table. Syobai turns his grey-eyed gaze down towards the surface of the table, before forcing himself to look up and meet Sora’s eyes.

“I need your help,” he says simply. “I fucked up.”

“You do that a lot. Elaborate.”

“I fucked up really, really bad.” Syobai pauses. “With Mikado.”

Sora tilts her head. “Last time I asked, you told me the two of you were "just sleeping together casually.” Did you lie to me, Syobai?“

Syobai swallows heavily. He can hear his heart beating in his ears.

"Mikado is pregnant,” he finally says. The words actually leaving his lips feel like the final blow in a fight, and he’s just lost. “With my children.”

“… oh.” Sora blinks a few times. “So this was an accident, I take it? Whatever happened to high school Syobai Hashimoto who carried five different types of condoms in his wallet at all times just in case he met a hot guy walking home from school?”

“Hey, in my defense, I usually still have condoms.” Yes, they’re a bit harder to find nowadays, as is almost everything, but up until now, he’s always managed to have one on hand for when the two of them start feeling frisky (which tends to happen at least once a day). “To answer your question, though, what happened is Setsuka decided to get hitched.”

“The party,” Sora gasps, remembering suddenly. “Oh, my God. So you two did fuck in the bathroom! Emma owes me five thousand yen.”

“Yes, we did do that,” Syobai mumbles. It’s not totally his fault, he thinks. It’s not like Mikado wasn’t grinding on him half the night, begging him to fuck him as hard as he could against the wall. It’s no doubt the best sex he’s ever had in his life.

And, of course, it’s the one time they fuck without a condom and without pulling out. Not that that’s guaranteed to help anything, but hey, it might have? Maybe it’s just wishful thinking on Syobai’s part.

“So what’s the problem?” Sora continues. “Does he not want the babies?”

Syobai looks away. “I, uh. I don’t know.”

Sora’s eyes narrow dangerously. “You didn’t talk to him about it?”

Syobai gives a dry laugh. “Well, ya see, that’s where the whole ”I fucked up really bad“ bit comes in.”

“What’d you do.” This isn’t spoken as a question, somehow, as Sora’s voice deepens. She’s already pissed off, great, and Syobai has a feeling she won’t be any happier when he tells this part of the story.

“Um.” Syobai swallows again, more nervous this time. “I… I ran off.”

Silence. “Excuse me?” Sora says. “You wanna run that by me again?”

Syobai still isn’t meeting her eyes. He recalls exactly how the exchange went, just about two hours ago now.

“I’m pregnant.”

The world stops turning.

Mikado’s holding his hands over his stomach, gloved fingers gripping the fabric of his shirt so tightly his hands shake. Syobai, on the other hand, just. Stands there. Staring at Mikado, completely speechless.

Before he knows it, his body is reacting all on its own. Syobai opens his mouth, trying to form an intelligent response, but all that comes out is two words he’ll regret deeply:

“I can’t.”

Before Mikado reacts to that, Syobai yanks the front door open and takes off down the street, running and running and running until he can’t, falling to his knees behind the 7-11 – how the hell did he get there, it’s a mile from the house – choking and coughing before he inevitably pukes from the strain of running so far, so fast.

This all goes through his head in the span of about two seconds. “I just stood there like an idiot,” Syobai finally says. “I – I said I can’t and then I ran.” His hand curls into a fist. “I ran like the dumb fucking coward I am.” He brings his fist down on the table as hard as he can. Sora doesn’t jump, instead staring at him evenly. “Go ahead and say it. I know you want to.”

“You’re right for once. What the hell is wrong with you?” Sora snaps. “I know that taking responsibility for your numerous fuck-ups is completely foreign to you, and usually you get away with it with no consequences because that’s just how it is when you deal with people you don’t care about and criminals, and hey, I can let it go when it’s some nameless Yakuza dude who got assassinated with a gun you sold someone 'cause I don’t care either,” she begins. “But then, you turn around and do this shit? To Mikado? To someone we all know, and yeah, he might be a rat, but he doesn’t deserve to be left high and dry and pregnant and scared because you –” And here she points at him, Syobai flinching as every word cuts deeper, “– are a fucking coward. You’re God damn right you screwed up.”

“I was scared,” Syobai says, his weak attempt at a protest surprising even himself.

“You were scared?” Sora laughs, and it’s bitter. “That’s funny. It’s funny that you were scared. How do you think Mikado feels right now? Alone, facing the possibility of having to raise more than one child by himself after the man he’s spent half of high school madly in love with, and the man he’s been sleeping with for the past six months, ran away when he told him he’d gotten him pregnant?”

There’s really nothing he can say to that. Syobai sighs shakily. “I wasn’t just scared because he’s pregnant,” he finally says. “I was scared because…”

He shuts his eyes.

“Because I love him. I love him, so much that it hurts, and I may as well have just stabbed him right in the chest.”

“And you’re not used to that,” Sora says. “You’re not used to caring for anyone except yourself. But as long as you kept telling yourself it was just for fun, and there were no feelings involved, you could shrug it off. Maybe a part of you thought Mikado felt the same way, like it was just a game. Then he started to make your world wider, you started to get comfortable with it, and you got scared. Then he came to you, and told you that it wasn’t just him anymore, and you panicked. You couldn’t handle it. But instead of staying there and talking to him about it like an adult, you were just cryptic, and then you ran away.”

Syobai opens his eyes and looks over at Sora. He somehow looks even older than he usually does. “Yeah. Yeah, you got me there.” He swallows, heavily, and his mouth tastes like copper from how hard he’s been chewing on his inner lip. “It was just supposed to be for fun. It was never supposed to be serious.”

“Yeah, well, tough shit,” Sora shrugs. “Mikado’s pregnant. You’re gonna be a dad. You could run all the way to America and it wouldn’t change a thing. The only difference is, Mikado has to live with what you gave him forever. You’ve got two choices: you can drag your sorry ass home and show Mikado you’re sorry, or you can keep running away. But, I’ll have you know…” And here, Sora’s voice darkens, and she looks more dangerous now than she ever did before even with a gun in her hands, “If you leave him like that? And if you ever run away from him like that again? And dare to show your face in Japan again? I will personally hunt you down and make you beg for me to kill you. Understand?”

“… yeah. I understand,” Syobai replies. He runs a hand through his hair while Sora takes a couple of breaths to calm herself down. “I don’t want to leave him. But I don’t think I’m ready to be a father. Or much of anything, really.” He looks down at his hands, rough and calloused and forever stained with the blood of so many that only he can see. “What if I can’t love them?”

“If you love Mikado as much as you say you do, you’ll fall in love with those babies way before they’re ever born,” Sora tells him. “Listen. This world’s gone to shit. It’s gonna be hard to raise a family like this. That’s why Yoruko and I are waiting. But it’s a little too late for you to do that, so all you can do is suck it up and do everything you can to make sure they never have to be a part of what we were.”

Sora’s words seal Syobai’s decision.

—

He tries calling Mikado to tell him he’s coming home for an hour, and gets absolutely no response. A part of Syobai is worried, desperately hoping Mikado didn’t do something stupid and end up hurting himself, and wants to get home as soon as he can, but…

The other part of him feels like if he just shows up at home with no warning, it’ll only make the situation that much worse.

So he calls, and calls, and calls, and gets sent to voicemail over and over, until finally, there’s an answer.

“Fucking Syobai Hashimoto,” a voice that is decidedly not Mikado’s comes through the speaker. “I ought to skin you alive and wear you like a fur coat. How dare you.”

Syobai sighs and frowns, rubs a hand over his face. “Hello, Nikei.”

“Don’t you hello, Nikei me!” The furious man spits over the phone. “Ever since Mikado told me you two were a thing, I’ve been looking for a reason to shoot you and make Why Syobai Hashimoto’s Death Should be Celebrated as a National Holiday an article on the front page news for a month straight! Now I finally get a reason and I can’t even do it because Mikado wants his kids to know their scumbag father!”

Syobai pauses. “… he wants me to come back?”

“I want you to come back, too,” Nikei starts to say. “So I can beat you to death with a baseball bat.” It sounds like he wants to say more, but then Syobai hears a very quiet, muffled voice in the background. It has to be Mikado. He strains to hear, but it’s no use, because the phone doesn’t pick up exactly what he’s saying. A few seconds later, though, he hears Nikei give a heavy sigh.

“Alright, fine. Mikado wants to hear you out, so I won’t be here when you get back, sadly,” Nikei mutters. “But I can be there in ten minutes tops if he calls me back, and I’d love to see you try to outrun my bullets.”

“Point taken.” Syobai closes his eyes and lets out a slow breath. “Tell him to leave the door unlocked. I’m coming home.”

—

It takes a little under an hour for Syobai to get home. He has to walk all the way there, after all, and he’s already tired, but he pushes through. By the time he makes it to the driveway, it feels like his legs are about to fall off.

Then he gets to the front door, puts his hand on the doorknob, and hesitates. It’s like all of the exhaustion evaporates, replaced by pure adrenaline and the urge to turn around and start running again.

No. He’s made up his mind. Syobai closes his eyes, the mental image of Mikado laughing brightly in his arms appearing to him with no trouble at all, without him even needing to think about it.

God. All the things he would do to make that smile come back to Mikado’s face. All the things he would do to forget the look of heartbreak he saw for just a split second when they were standing in the living room.

He turns the doorknob and walks inside the empty living room. His feet land in the same place they were, and he lets the door close behind him as he takes a few shallow breaths. The nagging little voice in the back of his head says you should’ve ended this a long time ago, Hashimoto. You always knew you’d never be man enough for him, to protect him, to care for him. You’re just a coward.

Syobai ignores it, pushes through the pain and walks over to the door of the bedroom he and Mikado have been sharing. Technically, it’s Syobai’s room, because this is his house, but his sheets smell like Mikado, and it’s his and Mikado’s clothes on the floor in that room, and there’s a picture of both of them hanging on the wall.

Syobai bites his lip so hard he tastes blood, then knocks three times on the door. He contemplates saying something to announce his presence, but finds it better to keep his mouth shut for right now.

At least, until the door opens up, and it’s Mikado standing before him, with no mask, his face clearly streaked and stained with tears. Syobai forces himself to look at his face, look him in the eyes, because Mikado deserves that, at least. He deserves so much more than what Syobai’s given him.

Neither of them really knows what to say at first. Then Syobai takes a shuddering, shallow breath.

“I’m sorry, for what I said,” Syobai finally says. “I said ”I can’t.“ That was a lie. I - I can, I just… didn’t want to face it.”

“I really hope you didn’t come all the way here just to say I’m sorry and expect me to forgive you,” Mikado says, his voice barely above a whisper.

Syobai shakes his head. “I’m not asking you to forgive me right now,” he murmurs. “I just want you to hear me out. Then you can do whatever you want. I swear. Please.”

Mikado bites his lip and looks down at the floor, contemplating. “Fine. But I’m not doing this for you.”

“That’s okay.” Syobai closes his eyes for a moment, then looks back evenly at Mikado as he slowly gets to his knees, now looking up at him. Mikado doesn’t hide the look of shock on his face as Syobai starts talking.

“Listen. I’m not gonna make excuses. I’m a coward, and I’m a fool. I broke your heart. When things go beyond my intentions, I try to own up to them. Today I ran away instead.” He swallows heavily, watches as Mikado shuts his eyes tight. “I - until you told me this morning, I was a man with nothing to lose. Nobody but myself. Then I went from that, to having everything to lose in two words. All my life, I never cared about what happened to anybody but myself. I didn’t give a shit. And now…” He looks at Mikado’s stomach, where he’s resting one of his gloved hands, as though he isn’t even thinking about it.

“I realized no matter how far I ran, or for how long, I’d never be able to forget that. I couldn’t change it. I can’t go back in time and stop what happened.” Syobai sighs. Mikado’s hands tremble. “The more I thought about it, the more I realized: I don’t want to stop what happened. I don’t want these kids to not exist.”

“Then why did you run away? Why’d you leave me?” Mikado chokes out.

There’s no turning back now. Syobai looks at Mikado right in the eyes, grey meeting pale brown, Syobai finally ready to say the words that could make or break him.

“Because I love you, Mikado Sannoji,” Syobai says, clearly, sincerely, the only words that have ever come from his mouth with complete purity. “I love you, and it’s real and it’s raw and it scares the living hell out of me, because I didn’t think I could until you walked into my life.” He reaches out, fully ready for Mikado to push him away. Instead, he’s pleasantly surprised when his cold hands are wrapped in Mikado’s warm ones. He hasn’t looked away from him, not for a moment, watching as more tears spill down Mikado’s face despite him trying to fight them. “I got through life by putting up paywalls, literally, and I knew no person in their right mind would ever wanna get past them.” He gives a little laugh. “I didn’t count on you, coming in and blowing holes through them.”

“Hey, I only blew a hole in a wall once, and that was an accident,” Mikado laughs and cries at the same time, his body trembling. By now, Syobai’s shaking too, but he’s still fighting his own tears.

“Well, you sure got rid of mine,” Syobai says. He lifts one of his hands to his lips and kisses his knuckles. “To be honest, I’m still scared. I don’t know what I’m doing, not with you, not with the kids we made, not with my life, but I do know one thing: I wanna figure it out with you, and nobody else.”

His voice cracks. Syobai swallows heavily, one last ditch-effort attempt at holding back his emotions.

“Will you let me stay here, right here, by your side?” Syobai asks, voice strained. “Will you let me become the man you deserve?” He sniffs, his last words coming in a quiet sob:

“Will you let me be a father?”

Mikado nods, squeezes Syobai’s hands, his decision made as soon as he sees the tears – so very real, undeniable evidence of Syobai bearing his soul to Mikado for the first time – coming down his face like rain.

“Yeah. Yes, let’s do it,” Mikado whispers. “Oh, my God. We’re gonna be fathers.”

Syobai leans forward a little, rests his head against Mikado’s belly, presses their still interlocked hands against the small, barely-noticeable swell, evidence that their children are safe, growing, and healthy. He doesn’t say a word. He doesn’t need to, as he rolls up the bottom of Mikado’s shirt and kisses his skin, so gently he’s afraid he imagined it at first.

Syobai Hashimoto doesn’t so much fall in love with Mikado Sannoji; instead, rather, he stumbles into it, clumsy and foolish and with no grace at all. But he falls in love with their little ones in a split second, a moment in time he’ll never forget.

[ryouverua]

Chapter 5 Investigation (1)

Oh, that’s just my heart breaking. Why, what’s going on with you?

Is that Komaeda’s bloody song playing right now??? I know you guys want to hammer home the comparison right now but really??? Really???

I get it, it is a horrifying song for a horrifying moment, I really do - but I want to distinguish this the last game and this whole set-up (as well as the two involved!) have me feeling all sorts of Umineko things, so I’m going to lend you some alternatives to go with the truth/lies theme I desperately want back while I read over everything again.

Golden slaughterer  |  Miragecoordinator

honestly they both fit well because goldenslaughterer literally played when a similar garage shutter was lifted and the horrifying sight was revealed while also having a harpsichord section Kaede would be proud of, while Kokichi would probably love the title ‘mirage coordinator’ so take your pick or look up the original ‘sing the empty truth’ song, it’s up to you .

And the rest of you are here -

I really don’t know how Shuichi’s heart can hold it together at this point. Aaah, Sweetcheeks...

Ow game, okay! No need to rub further salt in the wound! As if I wouldn’t be able to recognize his coat the second I saw it there smh...

I can’t even imagine how Maki is feeling right now.

FML we’re so in sync right now and under the most terrible of circumstances -

OH LEAVE US THE HELL ALONE YOU STUPID BEAR

If.... Monokuma is moving? If the killing game is continuing? I... don’t know about that...

I want to make a Saimouta joke here but I CAN’T THIS IS SO AWFUL EVERYTHING HURTS

AND SHUICHI IS ACTING SO NATURALLY, EXACTLY AS HE SHOULD IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS

Shit, dude. Still, this wasn’t just some stranger - right? Or... or have you been through something like this before?

Compartmentalizing, huh? I guess if you engage with the situation as the Ultimate Assassin rather than Kaito’s friend/potential love interest, you could move forward in the short term...

Aaaah, but just like Maki, Shuichi has another role he can slip into too - though I don’t know if he can do it as seamlessly as Maki has.

Oh??

I was about to make a comment on Shuichi clinging to a fragile shred of hope that Kaito wasn’t dead, purely for emotion’s sake the same way Kaito did last chapter with Gonta, but...

... Maki unintentionally brings up a good point, though completely flipped upside-down. When Kokichi was being the mastermind, Monokuma was gone - being guarded, I’m assuming, as shown earlier with the exisals - and now someone is dead and Monokuma/the killing game are both back on. So... why? Why show up now? Could this just be the case of the mastermind finally being able to create a new Monokuma, or does this mean....?

Yikes, I forgot - he wasn’t just sick, he was wounded. That... would make things extremely difficult....

Honestly, that’s true both ways. I just... I don’t know if I can see Kokichi killing Kaito. He has (had?) all the cards - there was no need to. He would be the obvious culprit - I mean, honestly, just look at everyone now - he is the obvious culprit - and if he just took temporary control of the game and lost it somehow, why would he risk making himself the blackened?

Could... no, this seems silly, but could this be a framing by the mastermind, to paint the troublemaker as the culprit? It would be an interesting callback to the first game, except with the victim being... well, not ~hidden~ in the same way. It’s a bit of an unlikely scenario, but no point in discounting it right out the gate.

YES SWEETCHEEKS SLAM THAT TIRED HOPE OR DESPAIR THEME BACK INTO SDR2 WHERE IT BELONGS

Somehow I don’t think that’ll be a problem with Monokuma back in the fray and also Maki who, let us all remember, has a hunting knife on her person.

Just so you know Tsumugi, the fact that you seem to know a lot about Junko is really making me side-eye you right now. still love you though

ALSO! ALSO, THIS COMPLETELY RUNS AGAINST WHAT YOU WERE ALL SAYING ABOUT KOKICHI GETTING BORED OF THE GAME AND THROWING IT AWAY! YOU CAN’T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS! Though I guess you could argue the illusion of taking the game away only to suddenly spring it upon everyone again would be despair-inducing and blah blah blah but that is still highly suspect -

Maki is seriously in ‘take no prisoners’ mode, huh? I... I guess we all have our own way of dealing with death...

I don’t know if I’d call it that? It seems more like tunnel vision to me.

Well, let’s take a look at the all-important Monokuma File...

Wait, you’re seriously not going to give us the victim’s identity? You, uh, you know we’ll know who it is once the other person comes to the trial, right? ... Didn’t this happen in the Kyouko/Mukuro case, now that I’m thinking back?

Maki?!?! Wait, really?!

I actually said, very softly, ‘oh, shit,’ out loud.

Shuichi’s just trying to pay tribute to him that’s all

No... no, despite how strange it might seem for Shuichi to not want to believe Kaito is in there, I think he’s making the right choice in exploring all the avenues. Maki should know by now that he’s willing to follow the path to the truth down to the bitter end - he’s done that with both Kaede and Gonta.

Seriously though, damn - you’re being seriously hostile? I understand grieving, but this seems a bit...???

the electrobomb

K1-b0, kiddo, it’s the electrobomb

Don’t stick around if you aren’t feeling well, K1-b0!!! This is a dire situation and you have nothing to prove right now!!!

HIMIKO STOP BULLYING K1-B0 THIS IS HIGHLY ILL-TIMED

I wonder what the equivalent feeling for him would be? Similar to nausea or dizziness or something? General fatigue or chest tightening? Fuzzy head, or a migraine? However it is, feel better K1-b0!

Aaah Himiko, you too huh? D: Man, everyone’s ditching us this investigation.

.... Tsumugi, you’re the last one standing. BE OUR INVESTIGATION PARTNER!

I guess??? It’s weird - she really seems convinced it was Kokichi. With that said, seeing Kaito - or who knows, maybe it is Kokichi under there - like that would shake anyone up. Himiko’s been through a lot this game, so seeing her resolve break down isn’t exactly abnormal.

Kokichi really left a huge impression on you. Every time she talks, Kokichi sounds like this impressive larger-than-life cackling villain from, well, one of her space epics she loves so much. It probably wasn’t nearly as much fun to go up against one of those types of characters in real life, was it?

Unless it was a locked room crime, which I don’t... know about yet. Eurgh. There’s only one confirmed entrance - the bathroom window has to be too small to fit anyone through, even Kokichi and Himiko. We could barely see Kaito’s whole face through it!

“Don’t neglect the heart!”

... Reasons to kill Kaito. Reasons to kill Kaito. If Kokichi was the mastermind, general ~despair~, sure. Fine. But if he wasn’t, which is what I’m 99% certain on now......

......... Self-Defence? Or did he die already? We haven’t had a chance to go over the safety feature of the press yet, but if Kaito was already dead.....

Wait Tsumugi too? She’s right there!

OI

SHUICHI!!!

TSUMUGI IS

RIGHT THERE

AND WILLING TO TALK TO US!!! YOU WERE LITERALLY CONVERSING WITH HER FOR THE LAST FIVE MINUTES! OI!!!

Shuichi: looks at Tsumugi, remembers love hotel scenario with her, resolves to investigate by himself

okay, harsh but fair tbh

I am so, so happy Shuichi’s focus is back on ‘truth’ and off of ‘hope’, you just have no idea.

I WASN’T READY FOR YOU TO SHOW UP AGAIN

You’re just mad you got sidelined for the last few days lmao

THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR MAKING THE MONOKUBS A THING

learn how to use EVA foam well and then get back to me, bear

I’M SORRY YOU CANNOT GET MAD ABOUT FALSE ADVERTISING WHEN KAEDE IS STILL PROMINENTLY DISPLAYED ON THE GAME COVER

So the body was moved... whatever happened, it wasn’t at the press along. Makes sense - no one would go in there without a fight or a reason (EYES K1-B0). Something must have happened to lead to this point.

Y-You’re braver than me, Shuichi... Aaaah jeez, I’m seriously not ready D:

!!!!!!

oh?!

.... I mean, thank goodness, but on the other hand.... we’re really sticking this through, huh? But to what end? The person still alive will have to come to the trial in the end, right?

That is some damn deliberate action. So someone doesn’t want us to lift the press... but there’s only one reason that would be, right? So we can’t ID the body, right?

Yeah!!! So why didn’t it work??

I... I have to wonder if the body was living when it went in there, and if it wasn’t... well, we have clear signs of something other than the press being a weapon (COUGH CROSSBOW THAT WE HAVEN’T FOUND YET BUT WAS TOTALLY SHOWN TO US EARLIER FOR A REASON), so that’s option 1, and then there’s Kaito’s illness which may have finally taken its toll. Are we going to have to determine what the real cause of death is, but without a body to look at? That... will be very tricky...

nngjsdklfngksldjf

D: D: D:

I don’t want to lose Kaito. I really, really don’t. I was preparing for it, but I was still going to flinch when the trigger was finally pulled.

But -

if - and that’s still a big if - Shuichi is somehow right, and it’s not Kaito - I really don’t want to lose Kokichi either, you know? He’s been such an incredible, interesting force during this entire game and especially with all the hints they’re dropping about the whole mastermind schtick of his being a coup as opposed to the actual truth, to have it end like this...

criiiiiiiiiinge now I really hope he was dead before he went in there

.... Oh shit, what if the crossbow was crushed with the body??? 

I said 10 seconds before finding out the bathroom was a MINE full of evidence, hot damn! I lost the screenshots for it, but what we found:

Crossbow

Bottle (poison from Shuichi’s lab??? so it finally comes into play...)

Black Case (so it wasn’t assembled before it reached the hangar)

Talk about a huge turnabout! So now there’s poison in play too? That means there’s a third method - or well, if you combine the poison with the crossbow bolts, a way for Kaito to completely incapacitate Kokichi. There’s no way for Kokichi to know how to assemble the crossbow, and the bloodstain pattern starts here, so if there was a body being ragged the original attack happened in the washroom. This is a pretty pyrrhic win for Shuichi regarding Kaito being alive - we now have evidence that Kokichi may be dead, but at the cost of Kaito being the culprit!

It also means Kaito had someone help him from the outside.... Maki.

Aaaw, Sweetcheeks actually is starting get attached to K1-b0! And it only took you what, four chapters? Better late than never, I suppose!

Did Kokichi call it back for some reason? I’m surprised it didn’t react to you, even if it is being accessed remotely. Maybe it needs a proper pilot to be alert to its surroundings.

Exisals, but not humans - unless the alarm is turned off. You’d be able to do that from the inside, right? In order to get Kaito in there he’d have to have one of the exisals carry him in and I don’t think he’d want the alarm blaring but he also wouldn’t want to autopilot it with Kaito in the pilot’s seat in case he woke up (I have a feeling if anyone could figure out how to use one in a pinch, it would probably be him), so Kokichi going in first to be able to disable the alarm and let the exisal carrying Kaito in would make sense. Not that this probably matters too much right now - this is just me wondering about the initial transport a few days ago.

I have a strong feeling that it was Maki - 

Wait, what?? Seriously?!

UH, HIMIKO, WHY DID YOU BRING A CROSSBOW TO THE HANGAR???

I... didn’t actually bother to cap that last post. I thought she was just nervous the way she usually is. That does explain her current behaviour! Is she blaming herself for what happened?

W... WHATEVER HELPS YOU RECHARGE AT NIGHT, K1-B0....

With... an exisal maybe?

okay I’m going to have to separate this because there is so much going on right now. I like how we started with a clear victim but now we’ve got a lot of uncertainty being thrown into the mix. Disappearing culprits and hidden victims, eh? not enough to soothe my broken heart but I’ll take it