#*/im so sorry

[intercrusher]

this is their foreplay

[james-p-sullivan]

the older i get and the closer i am to reaching 30, the more the people around me try to deny me my age. it’s a constant ‘oh you’re just turning 29 again teehee 🤭’ or ‘dont tell your SO that, he’ll leave you for a younger model 😉’ and i just???? hate it?????????

i spent my entire teenaged years fighting for my life. i crawled through the deepest pits of my depression to cling to the promise of a life beyond that pain. i was so convinced that i was going to die young, that i would never see the grace of my age starting with a 2, let alone 3.

so im going to turn 30, and there’s not a damn thing anyone can do to stop me from loving it.

[ofswordsandpens]

idk why people get super pedantic about the movie logic in Home Alone and start and try to pick it apart, because like, its a Christmas movie about a child accidentally being left home alone, the premise isn't exactly asking us to suspend our disbelief that much, and yet nearly every single "gotcha" question I see people bring up about this film is literally answered within the first 15 minutes :/

[everwalldigan]

Bruce: who are you? A new crime lord?

Jason: *takes off his helmet*

Bruce: *squints suspiciously* a new crime lord who looks like a grown up version of my dead son?

Jason: *sighs in annoyance and forces a bright smile*

Bruce: JASON THE NEW CRIME LORD???

[daftmooncretin]

spock’s room decor is actually fucking bonkers. The weapons??? the big red velvet curtain??? like ok phantom of the opera go crazy.

for reference jim’s room has some photos and a plant so we can surmise this is uniquely a spock being a dramatic weirdo thing

[chessb0r3d]

Analysis so bad you don't even know what it's talking about anymore.

[bosspigeon]

so bc i am a Gross Dude my friends i and sometimes rate our burps and my coworker (who is a teen girl) burped in front of me once and i instinctively rated it

so now every time she burps she looks to me hopefully for a rating and bc she has delicate little baby burps i now have to create an entirely new Burp Rating System unique to her bc i rate anything below a 5 and she looks at me like this

[amygdalae]

Me in 2018: I can't thirst post that's embarrassing

Me now: I know he nuts loud and abundant

[catmask]

its true that romance amd friendship will not solve everything but. objectively speaking its very hard to get sad when you can say 'lets go get cake tomorrow okay' and someone will go get cake with you. like there is some good at least. you know

[hoodedjelly]

The Square Root Of Two

[rambrandt-the-painter]

went insane with the brushwork here

[kalopsic-lagomorph]

miku worldwide usa edition (click to fully appreciate)

(go follow the cool artists under the cut)

finished map: here

washington: @mochasucculent

oregon: @the-jelliphish

california: @camiliar

arizona: @apelgif

nevada: kikiCPU

utah: @ace-o-hearts

montana: @just-luxx

idaho: @roxyrot

wyoming: @saintlethanavir

colorado: @yaelartworks

new mexico: @eldritch-ace

north dakota: @schwoopsiedoodles

south dakota: beebeerock

nebraska: @glassofoj-twitter

kansas: @petziez

oklahoma: @razzafrazzle

texas: @princepsed

minnesota: @pastabaguette

iowa: @rumpledcrow

missouri: @inkyharpy

arkansas: @basement-buddy

louisiana: @circusclownproductions

wisconsin: @plush0fairy

illinois: @shrimpimage

kentucky: @double-m-b

tennessee: @thebiscuiteternal

mississippi: @juneyybee

alabama: @burnt-scone

michigan: @chorne-the-firstborn

idiana: @meowjuniper

ohio: @teethflavoured

west virginia: @littleivyart

virginia: @splemonocracy

georgia: @alyossan

florida: kierscribbles

south carolina: @ash-animates

north carolina: @pinkcultgirl

maryland: @f4ceache

pennsylvania: @sukifoof-art

new york: @doodoobirds

new jersey: @porcelain-rob0t

delaware: easybriizydraws

rhode island: @crazywolf828

conneticut: @koreyeet

vermont: @maggotwithanf

massechusettes: @wishpetal

new hampshire: @ohnoshiv

maine: @limesade

alaska: @owldart

hawaii: @theexistingbox

[aterfish]

i love ways the word 'halfa' can be interpreted

[pbnmj]

THE NOIR-HOBIE INTERACTIONS THAT I MADE UP IN MY MIND ARE VERY REAL TO ME. SONY PLEASE PICK UP WHAT I’M PUTTING DOWN!!!

[doctorhomo]

“old man writes about gen z on their damn phones” ?????? no?????? old man writes about the dangers of staying in your own bubble and prejudice and privilege to the point where you’d rather die than let a black man save you????? old man writes about useless influencer-types who are so dependent on their bubble that they dont know when they need a piss???????? old man writes about white people desperately trying to make their own aryan society and staying in their racist BUBBLE ????????