#(which was also slightly written. mostly in dialogue)

[aroaceweirdos101]

Honestly, if Titan and Titania's relationship was ACTUALLY written well(in a sense where they go through a slow burn like Trillisto and it's like the "He fell first but she fell harder" trope):

This song would've TOTALLY fit Titania(ESPECIALLY with the idea of the other uranian moons as the muses).

[transdimensional-haboob]

Wistfully thinks of Spellwind, I should make a headcanons up to ep 31 list its just my equivalent of like Skyrim or lotr where theres so much going on and so dense but god damn one of my favorite episodes was when two of my favorite characters became trees and the entire experience was like...they were tripping on shrooms but also one with the shrooms? Its like episode 8

and I love the dms orc captain that hates going on land and is there for the in between transportation from sea to sea land to land ferryman (not really I feel like its mostly hard to narrate and have a character at the same time) I just love captain buttocks' (yeah I'm pretty sure thats his name) humor and how him and djett ('jet') were closer in the beginning

I love ty and varsha together but I also ship smith with them as time went on, I can't tell who I want to joke as the third smith and varsha are friends to lovers, ty and varsha are irritated assholes to lovers, smith is just a jaded old fuck that loves his morons (he respects varsha a lot and thinks ty is an entertaining idiot)

Varsha and Djett are siblings they love each other like family and share different spells and potions and knowledge of interest notes

I feel like the only person really thinking too deeply about this tabletop story and wanted to drop a few lines of appreciation, I like listening to it to go to sleep since its so slow paced and gently spoken and the music and sound efx is so sweet

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads // twitter thread  

Tears in the Water

NA contemporary slice of life romance about a competitive swimmer with anxiety at a sports university

they start seriously questioning their gender when they make some new friends and start dating a trans volleyball player

queer friend groups, aspec characters

[viv-hollande]

The Internet Historian plagiarism debacle is kind of uniquely funny to me. I'm "a fan" of Internet Historian, by which I mean specifically The Cost of Concordia, which is an excellently paced recounting of a personal interest of mine and is thus video crack for me, especially in the first half. While I did register some of his more 4chan opinions, I mostly ignored them because those videos generally weren't as tightly scripted and didn't hold my interest. ADHD brain y'all.

Even before Man in Cave I had mostly drifted away from his channel. The Area 51 video was the start of this. I only watched it once when it came out, but I vaguely remember it being sluggishly paced and packed with internet reference humor, especially that of the 4chan variety. I don't remember if I saw Man in Cave when it first came out or only saw the worse, rewritten version. Given that the original plagiarized article is excellently written, and that I don't really remember Man in Cave having that much of an impression on me, I probably never saw it, or only saw it one.

The really funny thing for me, though, concerns The Cost of Concordia. You see, because nautical stuff is of interest to me, I can attest that The Cost of Concordia is an exquisitely researched, extremely accurate retelling of the Costa Concordia disaster. Internet Historian was so committed to accuracy that he intentionally made the dialogue worse by using direct translations of the transcripts of the Costa Concordia's data recorder. A lot of it sounds slightly stilted and repetitive because of that direct translation, and because Captain Schettino kept asking the same questions over and over again.

In the Q&A for The Cost of Concordia, Internet Historian also goes into some of the creative process behind making the video. He talks about some of the ideas they had for the project, many of which actually had a lot of work put into them and later had to be scrapped. He talked about scrapping title cards, specifically because they broke up the flow of the video. Thank fuck he did, because again. Video crack.

It's just so funny to me that unlike iilluminaugtii and Somerton, who were all plagiarism, no substance, with just a tiny little heaping bucket of shitty personality, Internet Historian and his team are clearly capable of doing actual research and making well animated, well written, accurate videos. Even more strangely, he readily admitted to a few factual errors and misrepresentations in the Q&A, so he clearly doesn't mind admitting minor goofs for the sake of accuracy. What happened here? Did he get bored or something? Was he just assuming he could get away with it?

[thebibliosphere]

Hello Joy! If you're up for it, I've got a question for you. I've started writing a new story that I set in a world based on 1500's Scotland and I wanted the main characters to have Scottish accents, but alas I am from the American Midwest. Do you know of any resources or any people who could help me write my dialogue more accurately?

There are some resources for Scots English (like the the DSL), but I’m going to give you the advice I wish a lot of non-Scots people would use when it comes to writing historical Scottish accents: don’t.

The Scots language is not a monolith, and accents and dialect to this day vary greatly depending on region.

Most of the time even with research, what happens is a butchery of our language which borders on parody (sometimes even amped up by publishers because they want the Outlander effect) and is neither correctly spelled nor even phonetically accurate. A better way of writing accents/dialogue (and the way I tend to do it myself even when writing this sort of thing) would be to use regional and tone indicators.

So things like “he spoke with the broad, sweeping brogue of the lower west coast” or “her manner of speaking quickened with excitement, thickening her accent.”

If you want to use some Scots words, you can do so. Just make sure you look them up in the DSL and spell them correctly instead of making up your own.

A common phrase I like to use as an example for how to inject some Scots words into the dialect without murdering it would be the often very sarcastic “oh aye, so you think so?”

It’s a phrase often used when someone is blustering or maybe being a wee bit rude. Sort of like saying “oh really?” As you invite someone to keep digging their own grave.

I’ve seen it spelled every which way from “och aye, di’ye ‘ink sew?” (Pure jibberish, don’t do that) to the slightly more legible if not entirely accurate, “oh aye, dae ye think soe?”

Another could be something like, “oh aye, he’s muckle canny” to mean “oh yes, he’s very smart.” I’ve seen all of those words misspelled at one point, the most memorable being “och aye ‘e’s mochel cannae” which is just…

Canny is smart/capable while cannae means you can’t do something. (And muckle can be spelt mochell if you want to but some modern Scots readers will squint at it)

I tried explaining that what the author had written was the equivalent of “yes. he’s very can’t” but she wouldn’t listen and it went to print anyway. Agony.

Anyway, I mentioned the DSL up top so I suppose I should link to it.

Most of the recorded words there are from 17th century onward. There is an option to search prior to that, though it is limited.

There are surviving texts from the 1500s, though unless you want your work to be readable by a limited few, I wouldn’t try to imitate it. It’s mostly written in archaic Scots that’d be illegible to even modern Scottish readers.

If it’s something you intend to go to print with, I’d also suggest hiring a Scots sensitivity reader. They can make sure there’s nothing glaringly obvious with misspellings and also if they know their history, point out where something is off.

My favorite is when Scottish historical stories have potato scones in the 11th century, which begets the concept of agricultural time travelers, but alas, it’s never that interesting and just a factual error.

Anyway, I hope that was helpful and not discouraging. Please do write your story. Just don’t fall down the Outlander trap of writing nonsense and trying to pass it off as a language that still exists and for which there is recognized meanings and spelling. Which it sounds like you want to do, so yay! Thank you for wanting to be considerate and as accurate as can be.

[fadingdaggerr]

heaven’s gate

pairing: larissa weems x gn!reader (r is only ever referred to as queer, no other specifics)

summary: locking eyes with a woman at a bar and finding purpose in her kiss

warnings (in order): alcohol consumption, making out, smut (thigh riding, fingering, eating out, heavy praise), r is a simp the whole time, so much side character use bc i like making up lil stories about the little people in my head, pretty dialogue heavy in some parts

note: sorry i’ve been gone, i’ve had severe writers block and my birthday was this past weekend so i was out and about. never written smut before so this is different from my usual comfort zone, let me know what y’all think <3 i also tried to keep r neutral as possible to accommodate all presentations and identities :)

the wind whipped against your face as you steadily continued along the sidewalk, numbing your cheeks. the honking of cars and chatter around becoming white noise as you were dead set on your destination, only need at this point to get out of the wind tunnels. an arm looked through yours suddenly, breaking your pace slightly.

“babe, you have got to slow down. these boots are not meant for walking, they’re for attracting,” parker says as he clings to you for warmth, even with his long emerald green jacket on.

you laugh a little, “i’m not freezing my ass off because you chose heeled shoes when you knew damn well we’re in the old district. that means cobblestone streets. i thought you had a college degree?” he shoves you with a laugh, there’s no point in arguing with the truth. he complains the rest of the way, and you just ignore him until he finally stops when the club comes into view.

the vibration of the music could be felt in the floors, on the chairs, at the bar. everything hummed together, music and voices. you took it all in until a rum and coke slid right next to your hand. you nod at the bartender in thanks, turning to take in the club, smiling at the group taking a photo in from of the lavender’s orbit sign with giant smiles and little pride flags in hand. your eyes continue to scan as you bring your glass to your mouth, then double back when a set of eyes connects with yours.

resting against a tall stool, martini in hand, was the most enchanting being you’d ever seen. lips curved into a smirk at your staring, but it didn’t stop you. you allow your eyes to travel down, taking in her short, white dress and her long legs, watching as blue and purple lights sway and highlight her body. your eyes snap back go to hers, returning her smirk before continuing your look around.

you find parker by the pool tables, cheering on the group playing there, not so subtle in his hands caressing one of their arms. you shake your head with a laugh, he was on a mission, just as he had said before you’d left. parker sees you and waves your over excitedly.

“okay, okay so will you play pool with me? and like, help me get them to like me?” he says pointing at the person in bleach-dyed overalls, only a red binder underneath.

“one game,” you say holding up one finger, “i’m not playing matchmaker all night, there’s someone i think i need to talk to by the bar.”

he jumps a little, hugging you, “okay perfect, one game is all i need. then i can help you get some.”

you grab a cue stick, applying chalk as you speak, “i don’t need help. and i think you’ll be a little to preoccupied to help me anyways.”

the object of parker’s affection, max, and their friend arlo, let you break the set. a singular solid ball fell in, putting you into a head start. as the game continued, you told parker what to do so that you could both win and help him with max, which didn’t seem to be an issue. the eight ball was your last in, as you aimed, you could feel eyes on you, burning into your back. turning, you see the woman from earlier watching, new drink, same look in her eyes. you nod towards her then shoot, the eight ball drops into the cup.

parker grabs you, jumping as he holds you, mostly just shaking you like a rag doll. max and arlo shake your hand. deepening their voices to sound all gruff and puffing their chests as they both say “good game, good game,” before breaking and laughing at themselves.

the three step away to get more drinks, and you turn back to where the woman in white had been, but instead she was walking back from the bar, two drinks in hand. she approaches you, setting one drink in your hand. a rum and coke.

“larissa,” she says, “that was quite the game.”

you accept the drink with a smile, introducing yourself, “the game? i don’t recall your eyes being on the cues.”

“perhaps not, but how could they look at anything else?” her words send a shiver down your spine, “let’s go sit, darling.”

you begin moving to find a place to sit down and talk with her. her hand rests on your hip as you walk to keep close to you and not get separated. her touch was electrifying, even through your shirt. you let her sit first, then place yourself next to her, close enough that your legs touch and her perfume fills your nose.

“what do you do for work, larissa?” you ask, eyes looking into hers. you couldn’t see how blue they were before, cursing the dim lighting around you for not gifting you this privilege earlier.

“i’m an english teacher at nevermore, it’s a private academy up in jericho,” she says proudly.

you nod excitedly, “i’ve heard of it! my friend jaya went there in high school since she lived closer to there than byron’s home in rochester.”

her eyes widen, voice nervous, “you know about outcasts?”

you grab her hand, “i am an outcast, i went to byron’s. maybe you know her, jaya o’leary? gorgon, perfect eyebrows despite not getting them done ever in her life?”

larissa laughs, “yes! we had a couple classes together during third year, that’s quite the coincidence.”

“all roads lead back,” you say, mostly to yourself. larissa’s lips form into a soft smile, the hand that’s still in yours tightening.

“what do you do?” she asks.

“i’m a counselor. i run support groups and one-on-ones for anyone in need, we have varying specialists and everything,” you say before you take a sip of your drink.

larissa leans closer, “what do you specialize in?” there’s genuine interest in her voice, and it makes you feel warm and fuzzy.

“queer adolescence and trauma. there’s a lot of kids that need a place to just exist as they are, and home is a confinement cell,” you say looking down into your lap, then back to larissa. she smiles at you, thumb running across yours.

“that’s an admirable profession, you should be incredibly proud of yourself,” her words are so heartfelt that you feel your chest bloom.

“thank you. and for the record, teaching is equally important. it’s a multi-faceted role, you should be proud too,” your eyes are locked with hers, trying to convey that your words are true.

just as she’s about to reply, a scream of your name catches both your attentions. parker’s freckles face popping into view as you watch him bob and weave through the crowd quickly until he stands before you with a giant smile. he almost speaks, but his eyes move to larissa then back to you with a playful smile.

“first of all, nice. second, wow. third, i am going to disappear for a little bit, are you okay here? i can stay if you need me too,” his words are hopeful, but you know his promise of staying is just as true, he’d never leave you if you said no.

“i’m okay, go have your fun and text me. for the love of god, wear a condom. and for the love of your best friend, do not give me extreme details about this later or i will vomit in your shoes,” you say as you shoo him away. he grabs your face and presses a fat kisses to your cheek with an i love you, i love you, i love you, before running off to max.

you groan and wipe your cheek, where did the gloss come from? larissa giggles next to you at the interaction, hand over her mouth. “nice and wow? he’s sweet,” she laughs.

your head hangs low, “that would be parker, the bane of my existence and my assigned ward at this point.” this makes her laugh again, and you almost think you heard angels singing.

“would that be the reason you didn’t come up to me sooner?” larissa prods.

you laugh a bit, looking at her through your lashes, “unfortunately, yes. he needed me to help him win the game so that he could look good.”

her tongue goes across her teeth, “i think it worked better for you, at least in my opinion.”

it’s your turn to lean a little closer now, “well i almost lost because someone, not going to name names, was quite distracting during the final round.”

her hand leaves yours, much to your dismay, but quickly finds its way to your thigh, “oh, i’m sorry. how could i ever make it up to you, almost-loser?” her tone and fake pout nearly kill you on the spot, her touch was making the fire within you burn hotter and hotter.

your hand rises to her neck, caressing her jaw with your thumb. she was so beautiful it was making you dizzy, but you spoke regardless, “i think you’ve already made it up to me just being right here,” you feel her cheek warm under your hand, “maybe i should be thanking you, you might have been my good luck charm instead.”

her lips are only centimeters from yours as she says, “maybe you can repay me then somehow.”

—

her lips were soft, but her kiss was not. her teeth nipped at your bottom lips as she pulled away to breathe, only to pull you back in. one hand gripped her waist, the other against the brick wall behind her to hold you up. her own held you face, keeping you as close as possible. the breathy moans she let out through the kiss made your grip on her tighten, then slide down more, just over the curve of her ass. you pull her hips into you, making another noise leave her.

her lips detach detach from yours, angling her head down, she begins to nip at your neck. you could’ve sworn she was a drug, your own personal aphrodisiac. your hand slides down more, catching her thigh and bringing it to your hip, pressing your hips into hers to give some friction. a noise escapes her at this action, something that makes you need to kiss her again, truly kiss her.

you lean away, ducking your head to catch her lips once again, kissing her with less lust and more intimacy. you savor the way she shivers as your fingers draw little patterns on her thigh as you kiss her, pouring everything into it. she pulls away, panting lightly. your lips migrate to her neck, gentle kisses and nips as you both catch your breath.

through heavy breaths larissa says, “my hotel is only six blocks away.”

your head leaves her neck, pressing a quick kiss to her lips, “my apartment is four.”

your eyes stay locked together, both of you grinning like teenagers. you whip your phone out of your back pocket, opening parker’s contact.

to: park nasty going back to my place. do NOT come back unannounced i was serious about the shoe thing. be safe ily

you shove your phone back in your pocket, hand now extended to larissa. she immediately takes it, weaving her fingers with yours and wrapping the other arm around yours, holding you to her. you’re about to speak to her again when you phone chimes.

from: park nasty ily babe go get some!! and a little more!!!! lord knows i’m about to go back for thirds

larissa reads the message from beside you, laughing at the outlandish text. you groan at it before typing your own quickly

to: park nasty damn give the poor thing a little recovery time u absolute creature. i’m not gonna feel bad for u tomorrow when u complain

you chuckle and put your phone back in your pocket. you look at larissa before you both burst out laughing. she didn’t even know parker but she basically got the full extent of him within one text and watching the two of you interact while playing pool and when he came to you both.

“i see what you mean by the assigned ward thing now,” she says through a chuckle.

you guide her to your street, “he’s a menace, but he’s the best friend anyone could ask for. the descriptive details of his sex life are the price i pay for friendship.”

she just has to ask, “park nasty?”

you cackle, “he decided on day one of us meeting at byron’s that that would be his name in my phone. he thought it would stick, like everyone would call him that or something.”

she laughs with you, “and did they?”

“no!” you laugh loudly, “who’s gonna call a fourteen year old boy that?” she giggles at the story, “but i never changed it because i thought it was so stupid that it was hilarious.”

larissa clings to you and rests her head against yours as you unlock the gate in front of the door, then enter the code to get into the building. you have her step ahead of you, guiding her to your door with a gentle hand on her lower back. she’s back against you as you unlock your door and let yourselves in. you grab her purse and place it on the bench behind the door, then take her coat hanging it on the hooks, along with your own.

just as you look back at her, her lips crash into yours. you immediately kiss her back, hands flying to her hips and holding her tight. hers found their way to hold the back of your neck, blunt nails digging into your skin. you began walking her backwards to your room, staying against the door for a minute as you savor each others touch. you fumble for the knob, backing her in once the door is closed. you’re completely overtaken by her, her lips, her touch, the way she’s holding you like you’ll disappear.

larissa’s knees hit the bed, and she pulls you to her lap as she sits down. you push her back more, laying her on the bed. you lips migrate from hers to her neck, creating more marks to go with the ones from before. working your way down, you press kisses to the expanse of her chest, pale skin just begging to be painted in your affection.

larissa’s legs shift and you suddenly find yourself under her, her dress riding up and exposing more of her thighs. her lips go back to assaulting yours, her hands sliding underneath your shirt to trace the skin of your abdomen. only breaking away to gently ask, “is this okay?”

you smile at her, leaning up to kiss her cheek, “more than okay, i promise.”

her lips are back on yours, your hands are back on the creamy skin of her thighs. she was your new drug of choice, you couldn’t stop the venturing of your hands on her body as her lips and tongue pulled soft moans from you. you need more of her, as much as she’ll allow you.

you shift your hips, raising your right leg to press you thigh to her center, making her lips stutter as she moaned against your chest. her hips instinctually buck against your thigh again, and you hear her breath hitch.

“are you okay? we can stop,” you ask gently, gently stroking the skin of her thigh to assure her.

“don’t,” she rushes out, “i want this, i want you.”

there’s nothing to do except kiss her, kiss her so that it feel like a promise. your hands slide from her thighs to her hips, slowly guiding her against you. she moans into your mouth and your hands move her hips faster, her pleasure was all you could think about.

her moans grew whinier as she desperately moved against you. her forehead pressed into yours as her release grew closer and closer.

“you’re so beautiful,” you mutter, pressing your lips to hers, sitting up so she was now on your lap. the new angle and your words forced a filthy moan from her lips, “and you sound so beautiful. god, how do i deserve this?”

larissa could only kiss you harder, stealing the breath from your lungs. her hips wild against your thigh, the feeling of your hands gripping her hips, it was all too much. your lips found their way to her chest again, you nudge fabric out of the way to kiss along her breasts, gentle love bites that were soothed by your tongue.

larissa’s hips began to falter, moans becoming louder and longer. you flex your thigh more, kissing her as you move her hips faster. her hands grip at you shoulders, eyes screwed tight with pleasure. she was so close.

“open your eyes, baby. i wanna see you, can i see your beautiful eyes?” you ask as you kiss her neck and jaw, biting the skin every now and then, “please?”

larissa’s eyes flutter open, lust-drunk eyes looking into yours. you quickly reward her by pushing her further down on your thigh, making a sweet moan come from her as she looks into your eyes.

“fuck, you’re so beautiful,” a kiss to her chest, “you’re doing so well,” a kiss to her neck, “you can let go whenever you’re ready,” a kiss to her jaw, “i can’t wait to see you fall apart just for me,” a final kiss to her lips.

your words seem to be the undoing of larissa weems. she moans loudly against your lips, hips quickening then stuttering. blue eyes find yours as a long and beautiful song escapes her, thighs shaking. you’re in awe, entirely captivated by her. you can already tell that you’re not going to be able to let her go, your mind had been screaming to keep her close since you saw her. this sight was the only thing that mattered now, pleasing larissa was your life mission.

her forehead drops to yours, eyes shut, breath heavy. you stay there for a moment, unmoving, allowing her to come down peacefully. your raise your arm slowly, gently brushing hair from her face before cupping her cheek. her cheek presses into your palm, and you just have to kiss her. it’s soft and sweet, just a reminder that she’s cared for. she pulls back, eyes opening slowly. all you can do is smile at her, and she returns it gently. your lips find her cheek, pressing a few kisses to her skin.

“where the hell have you been?” she says with a breathy laugh.

you smile harder at her words, “i’ve been right here. guess you’ll have to come to the city more often.”

“or you’ll just have to come to jericho,” she says playfully.

you kiss her softly before speaking, “i have a good reason to it seems. a very beautiful reason at that.”

she pushes you back, leaning over you to press her lips against yours. the dance is slow, meaningful. her tongue grazes your lips for entry, and she’s given it without second thoughts. she kisses with full passion, telling you everything with every movement. she sucks on your bottom lip, making you groan and pull her face closer. all you want, need is her. you whine as she pulls back, and she gives you a quick kiss to appease you.

her fingers begin to lift your shirt up slowly, eyes searching for permission. you grab one of her hands, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. you grab her other hand and guide them both under your shirt, letting her know you’re okay. she strips you of your shirt, and kissing down your chest and belly. her hands find your belt buckle, undoing it quickly while you lift your hips help her remove it. she climbs back up, kissing a trail from waist to your lips. your hands fall to her back, finding the zipper of her dress as she lazily kissed you.

she sits up and her dress falls down, revealing a lack of bra, leaving her in ruined panties. you sit up and your lips immediately find her chest, wrapping around one nipple as your hands traced her body. your tongue swirls around her, leaving her skin with with a gentle kiss before moving to the other.

“god, you feel so good,” she lets out breathily, whimpering at your touch. after a bit she forces your head away from her chest, pushing you back down to remove your pants and her dress, evening the amount of clothing you both wore.

the view of her above you was breathtaking, you couldn’t take your eyes off of her. her hair was messy, lipstick smudged around her face, bruises and bites across her neck and chest. she was a goddess in your presence.

“what are you staring at me for?” she whispers, insecurity well hidden.

“you’re… you’re just so god damn gorgeous larissa,” you pull her down and roll so that you’re on top of her, “i can hardly believe you’re here, that you’re even real,” you kiss her softly. your lips trail down her neck, to her chest, down to her stomach, “and i get to see you like this.”

she pulls you up to her again, kissing you soundly, “it’s hard to believe you’re real yourself. never has anyone spoke to me like this, even made me feel like this.”

you frown at her words, mad at her past lovers for not appreciating her enough. “can i show you how beautiful you are?” you ask gently, nuzzling your nose against her cheek before continuing, “can i taste you?”

she groans at your words, turning her face to kiss you hard, “please.”

you kiss her again, trailing back down her body. reaching her center, you place a light kiss to her thigh, biting the plush surface then soothing it with your tongue. your fingers lightly trace up her legs to hook in her panties and pull them down. you bite your tongue, nearly moan at the sight.

you kiss along her thighs some more, slowly moving closer to where she needed you. you look up at her, “do you want me to continue?”

her hand reaches down for one of yours, and you are quick to follow, tangling your fingers together. she squeezes your hand, “yes.”

you kiss her mound gently, then move to her clit. wrapping your tongue around her, her hand grips yours. your tongue swirls her clit some more before going to taste her fully. your tongue gathers her wetness, you moan into her at the taste. the vibration alone makes larissa choke out a strangled moan. you continue to lap at her, slow, long strokes against her, savoring every second.

a long lick up back to her clit, sucking it gently, working larissa up. your hand that was wrapped around her thigh came to her entrance, slowly pressing your middle finger into her. she moans softly at the touch, squeezing your hand as you pumped your finger slowly.

“more,” she whines, “please.”

you follow command, adding your ring finger when you push back into her again while your tongue plays with her clit. a deep moan leaves her, only egging you on. quickening the pace of both your tongue and your fingers, you feel her legs wrap around you.

you pull back from he clit, pressing a kiss to it when she whimpers. “do you want more, baby?” your only response is a nod and a moan of your name.

your mouth is back on her, only to pull away again to watch her take a third finger. when your forefinger enters her as well, her moans echo off the walls. she pulls the hand she’s holding, wanting for your lips. you keep your fingers in her, letting her adjust as you climb up to kiss her. her arms wrap around your shoulders while her hips chase your fingers, moaning into your mouth. your thumb finds her clit, toying it in circles at the same pace as your fingers fuck into her faster.

you shove your face into her neck, sucking the skin and licking it and she grinds harder against you. she grows frantic in her movements as she gets closer, her walls hugging your fingers.

you move back down, replacing your thumb with your mouth. her moans become more whispers, her breathing shallow. “you can cum, baby. let me taste you,” you whisper.

your tongue and fingers move together at a fast pace, willing larissa to cum. the tight curl your fingers inside her makes her cry your name out as she climaxes. you remove one finger at a time as you slowly fuck her through her orgasm, bringing your fingers to your mouth to clean them. her eyes bore into you as she watches, you watch her in return. you keep your eyes on her as you clean her folds with her tongue, greedily taking every last drop of her.

“you taste like heaven,” you say as you kiss up her body, finding purchase in her neck. you press a kiss to her skin before asking, “you alright?”

she grazes her finger up and down your spine, “more than alright.”

you pull away from her, shuffling off the bed to stand up. she watches as you grab a t-shirt from the top of your dresser and throw it on, admiring you from the bed. “i’ll be right back,” you press a kiss to her cheek before turning to leave the room.

true to your word, you return within a minute, two bottles of water and a wet washcloth in hand. you prop the bottles on the nightstand closest to larissa and move between her legs to clean her up. she winces slightly, still sensitive, but you make it up to her with kisses on her thighs and hips. you drop the washcloth in the hamper, grabbing a shirt for her from your dresser. you lay down next to her, just watching her as she puts your shirt on and lays down facing you.

“you’re welcome to stay, if you’d like. if not, i can walk you back to your hotel,” you say quietly.

“do you want me to go?” she asks at the same volume.

you shake your head against the pillow, “not at all. i’ll even buy you breakfast in the morning, anywhere you want.”

larissa looks at the clock, 3:36 looks back at her, “i think it’s going to be lunch by the time we wake up.”

“ever heard of a diner, gorgeous? they have breakfast all day. you can get…” you look in her eyes, pupils dilating for a moment, “crepes with berries and honey, and a hot chocolate with cinnamon on top whenever you please.”

she stares at you with wide eyes and mouth agape, “how the hell did you know that?”

you laugh, realizing you’d only told her you were an outcast and not what kind, “i’m a telepath, baby.”

she blinks a couple times, “you’ve been reading my mind the whole time?”

you grab her hand, playing with her fingers, “no, i choose when i want to listen in, took a while to figure it out though. i just wanted to know your favorite breakfast, so i just looked for that.”

she pulls you into her, laying on her back to have your weight on top of her, “you are utterly delightful.”

you prop your chin on her chest, “may i ask what kind of outcast you are?”

she takes a deep breath, this was always a dreaded question, but she found herself trusting you with her secrets. she exhales slowly, “i’m a shapeshifter.”

“that’s so cool, i know a couple shifters. parker’s a shifter, but he can only shift to this big ass dog. but not like a werewolf, it’s voluntary,” you say as you glide your fingers up her arm.

“explains the amount of energy he has,” she responds with a huffed laugh.

you giggle at her comment, “i would’ve guessed you were a siren, just from looking at you.”

she smiles, “why’s that?”

“because you’re fucking outrageously gorgeous, larissa. bewitching, truly,” you say like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

you stretch across her to turn the light off before nuzzling into her. you fall asleep to her steady breathing and calm heartbeat, larissa’s arms wrapped securely around you.

—

you wake up in the morning with your face shoved in your pillow, a weight across your back. you crack an eye open, looking down to see a pale hand next to yours. memories of the night before flood your mind, lips growing into a smile. grabbing her hand, you bring it to your lips, gently kissing her fingers. lifting her arm just a tad, you turn and bury yourself in her chest, wrapping your arm around her as well. her arms wrap tighter around you, a yawn passing her lips. you kiss the skin against her neck closest to your lips, mumbling a morning, baby.

she hums in return, snuggling into you as she wakes up. you run your hands along her side, gently coaxing her into the waking world as you press soft kisses to her skin. finally moves by rolling over, trapping you below her, stealing a kiss from your lips. “good morning, lovely,” she whispers.

your peace is interrupted by your phone ringing from the nightstand. she reaches for your phone and and hands it to you, you kiss her hand in thanks. park nasty is calling appears on your screen, you mumble curses as you go to answer.

“what?” you ask.

“good morning sweetheart, it’s lovely to hear from you too,” parker says sarcastically into the phone.

“whatever, i’m putting you on speaker. behave yourself, larissa’s here,” you demand.

“oooo, is that the sexy blonde from last night?”

“yes, now behave yourself,” you repeat before pressing the speaker icon.

“hello miss larissa!” larissa says ‘hello’ back through a little laugh, “anyways, you aren’t going to fucking believe my night. please tell me you’re free for lunch, i’ll be a normal amount of gross i promise,” parker speaks quickly and excitedly into the phone.

you look at larissa as you speak, “well, we were going to go get breakfast- don’t even fucking start,” you can already hear him an snickering on the other line, “maybe you and i can do dinner or something?”

parker suppresses his giggles, “oh, please let me come to breakfast! i need to properly meet this larissa, i wanna hear all about last night’s desser-”

“parker, i will call abuela so fucking help me,” you threaten, and he knows you would.

“okay, okay! but please, let me join!” he drags out the last word, “larissa! please, tell this meanie i can come to breakfast. i’ll be good, scout’s honor.”

larissa chuckles, “yes, you should most definitely join us.”

“larissa please, he wasn’t a boy scout. abuela thought it was american propaganda,” you plead.

“too late! text me where you cuties are going, love you both. bye!” parker hangs up immediately, not allowing room for discussion.

“i’m going to need to stop by my hotel before breakfast, i have nothing to wear.”

you nod in agreement, “i’d offer you something of mine, but it doesn’t really seem to be your style.”

getting up from the bed, you extend your hand to her, “shower before we leave?”

she takes your hand, following you to your bathroom. you grab the hem of the shirt she’s wearing, lifting it up to expose her love-stained chest. she returned the favor, removing your own, as well as your own underwear. she pulls you in for a short kiss, just loving the intimacy of the moment. you both shower quickly, not wanting to leave parker waiting too long, but savor in the closeness and quiet

once you dry off, you hand her her dress from last night, then walk to your closet to pull out a light blue sweatshirt and a sweater. you place the crew neck next to her while you tread to your dresser. pulling cargo jeans out, you slide them on, and your t-shirt is quickly replaced by the thick black sweater. larissa never takes her eyes off of you, shamelessly watching you change, admiring her handiwork across your neck and chest. you catch her staring, and she’s quick to grab the sweatshirt, throwing it on as a means to hide for just a moment.

—

the drive to her hotel was nice, you spent the short journey asking random questions, some pointless and minor, some more thoughtful. favorite colors, worst fears, best birthday present, embarrassing childhood moments, you loved learning about her. you wished you could slow time, freeze and rewind the last fifteen hours over and over again.

she pulls you to her hotel room with your hands interlocked. you gladly watch her go through her outfits with a soft smile on your face, seeing how she pieces together what to wear in her mind. you want to read her, but you won’t unless she allows you to, and even then you’ll likely never ask.

“which do you think?” she holds up a white satin blouse and a white cotton one, and all you can do is blink.

“i think you look best in nothing,” she throws the satin shirt at you, “jeez, woman! i say…” you lean over her bag, spotting a pair of straight-legged black pants, “these, and keep my sweatshirt on. you look good in my clothes,” you smile. she only kissed you in response, before disrobing to get changed for the day as you text parker.

“i can’t be bothered with makeup today,” she grumbles as she laces up a pair of white boots.

you walk around to kneel down to tie the other shoe for her. “you don’t need it anyways,” you squeeze her thighs as you stand back up. “all set, gorgeous?” she nods, grabbing your hand.

—

larissa ends up applying mascara and tinted lip balm in the car while you head to the diner. parking across the street in the pharmacy lot, you jump out to open the door for her, bowing and extending your arm in jest. she smacks your arm playfully before wrapping her own around it.

sitting at table, your let you fingers dance along larissa’s thigh, both talking about random things while you wait for parker. neither of you noticed when he walked in until he slid into the and smacked his hands on the table. “good morning darling, meanie,” he nods to larissa and you respectively.

“so thirds went well i presume?” you say with a laugh.

he nods excitedly, “fourths and dessert too.”

you shake your head as the waiter puts menus down and asks what drinks you’d all like. latte, coffee, hot chocolate with cinnamon, you already knew. you stare at the menu while parker explains the beginning of the whole thing with max.

you turn to the breakfast page, pointing to the crepes for larissa. she smiles excitedly, mumbling to ask you if they have honey, “of course they do,” you say to her with a little smile.

“and so they had me like over the count- you’re not even listening. neither of you, i can’t believe this,” parker goes to smack you with his spoon when you bat him with the menu.

the waiter comes back, and takes your orders, taking a little to much care on larissa’s order. she pays him no mind, leaning on you while she orders, looking at you when you do. he seems to take the hint and quickly walks away, parker’s laugh taking place in his stead.

“doesn’t the fool know a basket of fruits when he sees one?” parker asks making larissa laugh, her hand flying to her mouth. her laugh makes you smile, eyes resting on her face.

“can i ask now?” parker asks, looking at you.

“three questions,” you say with a sigh.

“each?” he says with a sly smile.

“three total,” you say sternly making larissa chuckle again.

“where, how many times each, and are you u-hauling yet?”

your head smacks against the table before coming back up, “i hate you. my place, two and one, and watch your mouth.”

larissa’s head whips to you, eyes bulging out of her head. parker seems to put the pieces together first, because there’s a beat, then a crack of his laughter. he’s nearly struggling to breathe, then cries out when you kick him under the table. he resorts to holding back laughs, wiping tears from his eyes.

“had that much fun, huh?” he looks at larissa, his face turning red from laughter, “oh my god, larissa doesn’t get it. oh my god, please let me stay while you explain this.” you’re want to drown in your coffee cup, you have to explain this with parker across from you while in a public setting.

you duck your lips to her ear and whisper, “i told you that you tasted like heaven, didn’t i? brought me there with just the taste of you.”

you pullback and look at her face, her cheeks go fully red, eyes fluttering. parker is silent screaming at her reaction, you hold your head in your hands. you’re definitely snitching to abuela about his nosiness.

the waiter brings the food, crepes with berries and honey for larissa, eggs with toast and pan fries for you, and waffles with an absurd amount chocolate chips on top for parker. larissa immediately passes hot sauce to you, remembering your comment about loving tabasco sauce. you thank her with a smile, then glare at your friend when he does a little aaaawe.

“are you going to see max again?” larissa asks parker as he shoves half a waffle into his mouth.

he takes a sip of his coffee, “oh for sure. they’re too good not to, super sweet too. they would’ve come along but they had plans at their babcia’s place for lunch.”

you smile at him, “that’s awesome buddy.” you pick up a piece of cantaloupe from your fruit salad and pass it to him to take, he loves it while you loathe it. it just works.

he takes the melon from your fork, speaking while he chews, “what about you two? gonna keep up?”

you and larissa look at each other. you hadn’t even thought about it much, nothing past post-orgasm conversation. you want to say yes, but you don’t want to put pressure on her. she takes your hand under the table and speaks first, “definitely.”

you look at her, “yeah, vermont sounds pretty cool. i could spend some time there,” you turn to parker, “she teaches at nevermore.”

he perks up immediately, “you’re one of us?”

larissa smiles, “yes, i’m a shapeshifter. but i try to keep that a little quiet.”

parker’s grin is huge, dimples showing off, “totally get it. i’m a shifter too, people get a little freaked out by dogs that are five feet tall on all fours.”

larissa’s eyes widen as she looks at you, “you didn’t say he was five feet tall in that form.”

you shrug, “i told you he was a big ass dog.”

parker chuckles, “she was probably picturing a great dane, you moron,” he looks at larissa, “think the grim the harry potter, but lighter fur and better groomed.”

you laugh at his comparison, “sirius black was in prison for twelve years. did you want him to be all fresh and clean?”

larissa just laughs and watches in amusement as the two of you argue over the mauraders, her head on your shoulder, your arm around hers.

—

the rest of the time larissa is in the city, she’s with you. the next three days were spent touring around the city, going to shops and cafes, always ending in either your bed or her hotel’s, depending on which was closer. her departure time was steadily approaching, making you both a bit upset.

she lays her head on your chest, legs tangled with yours, sweat across both your bodies. you take the time to map her body with your fingers, needing to remember every inch of her. she was worth a six hour drive, hell she was worth a six century walk.

“what’s going on in your head?” she asks gently, “i can’t see into your mind, you know.”

you chuckle, kissing her forehead and hugging her close, “i’m just wondering how i can change my powers from telepathy to teleportation. would be so much easier.” she cuddles into you more, hugging you tight.

the next morning is slow, her alarm going off around six, even though she didn’t really need fo be up until seven. she just wanted more time with you. you spend part of your morning just holding each other, soft kisses holding promises. more kisses and hands between each others thighs in the shower, your name spelled on her clit with your tongue, her name falling from your lips as she brings you closer and closer.

you’re enjoying hot chocolate together in the lobby when her phone chimes, the nevermore car was only five minutes away. she looks at you with watery eyes, you bring your hands up to cup her face.

“it’s a six hour drive, whenever you want me there, i’ll be there. i know it’s harder for you to leave, i can organize and do meetings virtually time to time,” you kiss her cheek.

she shakes her head, “you’re job is too important, i can’t ask you to do that. that would just be selfish of me, they need you.”

“baby, i’m only working in person half the week with clients, the other half is all online. i’m a phone call away from any of them, you won’t be stealing me from anyone,” you assure her.

“you have to promise me you won’t sacrifice your job for me,” larissa demands.

you draw an x over your chest, “cross my heart. i’m not sacrificing my job, but i also don’t want to sacrifice you. i’m willing to make this work if you are.”

she kisses you hard, “i’m more than willing.”

you walk her to the car, putting her bags in for her. shooing away the driver, you open the door for her and guide her in. you lean your head into the car, “call me when you get home, okay?”

she holds the collar of your shirt to keep you close, “i’ll probably call you before i even get there.”

you smile and press a sweet kiss to her cheek, “please do, i’m gonna miss your voice.” you clear your throat, “i’ll see you soon, larissa.”

you start to back out of the car when she pulls your collar, pulling you into a long kiss, “better be soon.” she presses one last kiss to your lips before releasing your shirt, letting you back away and shut the door.

the car pulls off, and you watch until she’s gone from your sight. you make your way to your car, exhaling deeply before starting the engine and backing out of the lot.

you’re sitting on parker’s couch, legs draped across max’s lap while you both wait for parker to come back from the kitchen with snacks. community plays on the tv, one of the paintball wars playing quietly while the three of you were talking. your phone ringing breaks the silence, larissa <3 is calling.

“i gotta take this. i’ll be in parker’s room if you need me,” you say quickly to max and you scramble down the hallway.

you click the green answer button, “hey there, beautiful.”

you hear her laugh lightly, “i wanted to call you sooner, but there was horrible service. i’m almost to jericho now.”

“i’m glad you’re safe,” you say through a smile, giddy from her voice, “i’m at parker’s with max, i’m outnumbered here.”

larissa laughs again, making your heart swell, “i’m sorry, lovely. once you come to visit it’ll just be you and me, no being outnumbered or interrupted.”

“don’t threaten me with a good time,” you say, “fuck, is it embarrassing that i miss you already?”

“only if it’s embarrassing that i miss you quite a bit already as well,” she plays.

the bedroom door swings open, parker’s head popping in and pointing at the phone. the second you mouth larissa he grabs the phone and starts talking to her. you wrestle the phone out of his hand, shoving him out the door. “i’m telling abuela!” you yell down the hall, you can’t just hog your girlfriend is screamed back before bringing the phone back to your ear.

“sorry about that,” you say with a huff.

“it’s cute, the two of you fighting over me,” she jokes.

you laugh at her, “pray tell, who has won your affections?”

“park nasty,” larissa deadpans.

“oh my god, i’m hanging up,” you say as you don’t even move to do so.

“no, no, no, no, no. you win, of course you win,” she yells into the phone, “you win over everyone, i swear.”

“everyone? even sarah jessica parker?” you joke, referencing back to her confession of her childhood crush.

she laughs, “yes, even sarah jessica parker.”

banging in the door pulls you from the conversation, max and parker both beating on the door and calling fo you. gimme a second! is screamed at them.

“baby, i gotta go, homosexuals are beating down the door,” she laughs over the line, “let me know when you get to nevermore, okay?”

“i promise. and i’ll see you soon. goodbye, darling.

“bye, gorgeous. i’ll see you soon,” the line beeps as the call comes to an end.

feedback appreciated as always, love you a bushel and a peck <3

[animentality]

Maybe a hot take, but I think Durge is the real protagonist of BG3. Like... I'm sorry, everyone love their Tavs, but from a narrative point of view, it doesn't have fucking sense. It's just another guy (gender neutral) in a The Choosen One situation. I've read this story before, hundreds of times. But Durge's recepción (or disgrace)... now that has juice! That makes sense on a narrative level. You started it, you end it, one way or another.

Anyway, I'm never (with my +500 hours) going to play a Tav run. Ever. Origins only, mostly Durge. Durge and Durgetash are waaaaay better, sorry not sorry.

You are spitting nothing but facts, anon.

You wanna know what the HONEST to GOD fundamental problem is with the writing of Baldur's Gate 3?

It's that it spreads itself so thin, desperately attempting to write an open sandbox sort of world in which ANY kind of character can fit in...that it ends up being this hollow nothing.

IMAGINE if the Dark Urge WAS the default protagonist. It WOULD'VE BEEN an amazing story, if it had been given the focus it deserved, instead of just blankly repeating the SAME dialogue you'd get as a Tav and as an origin.

The idea of a former villain turned amnesiac, and going on an adventure, learning about themselves from the perspective of an outsider and seeing firsthand the horror they've wrought? It's like a fucking Zuko arc, except finding out you were the Big Bad all along could've been written even better than that...

We could've had that blank, nothing slate that Tavs start out as...and then find out, that it has thematic significance, because WE CHOOSE who we become, after a childhood/adulthood of being unable to make our own choices, and being forced into the role of the villain before the game even starts.

It's a MUCH BETTER WAY to give people a blank slate to work with, for the fun of roleplaying, but ALSO asserting a particular theme. Which is, the gravity of your choices, big and small. To do good or to embrace evil.

YOU KNOW. How Baldur's Gate 1 and 2 did being a Bhaalspawn.

IT'S ALSO A REALLY GREAT WAY to DO an RPG because yes, you slightly infringe upon the freedom of the customizable characters a person can make, but in exchange, you actually tell a fucking story where choices are the main theme.

INSTEAD. Because they were so dedicated to Tavs and the variety of ways you could play as a Tav...they completely undersell and underutilize what could've been a really amazing character.

You can literally choose to DIE for your friends in the end...and then what?

Withers brings you back in five seconds, no one has any real reaction to you doing that, except saying good job buddy :)

And then you're basically a Tav.

And ALSO. I want to say this, because it's been bothering me.

The Dark Urge has Tav syndrome too.

They have TWO notes in the entire game that we have to read into to try and glean a greater depth to their character other than murder hobo.

And that's it. They're a blank slate too.

If the Dark Urge was the protagonist, we might've been able to look into who they were before, outside of just laughably evil flesh eating monster.

They might've had real fucking depth, instead of just tidbits.

I and my fellow Dark Urge/ Durgetash enjoyers have to do the fucking work for them and write in stuff that isn't actually there. The Dark Urge as a protagonist could've been really meaningful. We could've seen inklings that they had misgivings about being Bhaal's Chosen. We could've seen scars of resistance, where they tried to defy Bhaal, but were punished with death, disintegration by the loving hands of your own father and flesh. We could've had betrayal, redemption, loyalty to one's blood family vs one's found family.

But we don't get that, because it's taking too much time away from Tavs.

Sometimes I really wish the Dark Urge wasn't even an option. They gave me this thing, and I thought wow this is the only way to play the game...and then I look and see, ah. But the potential for greatness could drive me absolutely insane.

And it has.

Durgetash is the product of my frustration with the game's characterization of the Dark Urge.

And I know I'm pissing off the salty BG3 fans who love their Tavs and all, and think the Dark Urge is lame, and god FORBID a protagonist have a character, can't have that in an RPG, but I can't find it in myself to care.

I'm built different than the rest of y'all. I don't just feed on content, I analyze its nutrients. I calculate how good for me it actually is.

And BG3 has wonderful mechanics.

But the story has so many problems, from beginning to rotten end.

And it is what it is. I still enjoyed myself playing it.

But the story isn't good for anything except allowing you to create a far more compelling story on your own, in fanfic or in original work inspired by it.

And I guess if that's all they wanted, then fine.

But goddamnit, I'm gonna complain anyway! Divinity 2 did it fucking better.

[sapphim]

sorry to bother - im trying to figure out how to work with plot flags in frosty editor for dav, and i know you 1. made the bi cassandra mod (my beloved) 2. make modding tutorials. any chance of seeing a tutorial for how you did it? only if it wouldnt be too much trouble!

Well believe it or not, I didn't make Bi Cass in Frosty. I made it with DAI Modding Tool and a hex editor. I don't recommend it. ;)

While the details change between games, the general structure of a conversation (child or linked lines, conditions, actions) really doesn't, so I am going to recommend you check out the first two parts of my Dialogue Modding Tutorial. It was written specifically for Origins and DA2 but the basic overview is largely applicable.

The exact structure of plot flags IS something that differs slightly between the Eclipse engine games and Frostbite games, although their purpose is still the same. Iirc plot flags in Inq and Andromeda each have their own GUID (unique identifier) rather than being a GUID+int pair. They also have counters, sometimes, rather than always being boolean (true/false). And a lot of the time rather than referencing individual plot flags, conversations will reference plot schematics, which are a separate file that can compare the results of multiple flags and other variables. They're a lot like defined flags in the Eclipse games.

Uhhhh in my limited experience making romance mods for Inq and Andromeda, the exact plot flags and plot schematics involved were all very easy to work with, mostly with human readable names and everything, which is always a plus. Other plot flags were uhhhhhhhhhh not always nearly so nice, so it's kind of luck of the draw there.

I don't know if there is anything of use to you in these two other asks I've answered about Frostbite modding but I'll link them anyway just in case: On dialogue modding, and on war table missions. (I never did end up writing that tutorial I mentioned in that one post because I quit Frostbite modding shortly after. Nothing against Frosty editor, however, it's a very good tool and easy to work with.)

If you need any other specific help with Frosty or Veilguard, your best bet is going to be found on Discord. I have links to some servers in my pinned faq.

[blixabargelds]

Hiii Frankie 💕 7, 8 and 15 please ( for the writer ask meme)

thank you babieee

7. Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

man this was hard. it’s honestly probably this long ass paragraph from my succession fic this mess we’re in. there’s holes i can poke it in from a writing perspective, i think my syntax is maybe lacking a little in what i now think of as my unique style, but man. it’s the one that came to my head and my gut so. it’s so personal and raw and uncomfortable and honest. i put my entire soul into this fic and i think this part both resonated deeply with a lot of readers which is so important to me, and is one of the reasons when i was in the succ fandom i had a lot of people tell me i was The roman roy understander. i think i’m good at getting into characters heads and this encapsulates that pretty well.

Roman’s never said yes please in his fucking life, but he has wanted it. It just rarely aligns for him like it does for other people. His head wants it, and his dick doesn’t. His dick wants it, and his head wants it to stop. He’s practised in knowing which part to listen to. Normally, the choice which makes whoever is fucking him get it over with. Fight or flight doesn’t work for him, he knows this, so he freezes until one of them comes. It’s not never him. Occasionally his head and his dick want it, like when Grace had worn that pantsuit and choked him still wearing it, or Gerri- he’d wanted it every time with her. She’d got it right, too. That razor’s edge of pain and pleasure, always pressed slightly closer to the former vein for Roman to feel right. Roman’s been thinking about it all, since he’s started staying with Stewy. About the possibility of being normal with sex. The idea of waking up next to someone and not immediately wanting to slink away, pretend it didn’t happen. The idea of getting fucked without being held down or hit. He just can’t picture it for himself. He’s been thinking about how he can’t get into some rooms of his head. He’s started to remember being called beautiful, a long time ago. He still hasn’t been to his barber.

8. Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

again so hard!! i love dialogue and it’s something i think i’m really good at and get the most comments on. honestly there’s probs better ones i’ve done but i really love this exchange when john is trying to distract gale from getting his fucked up arm reset in this must be the place. mostly bc i came up w the meatball story on the spot it just flowed out of me i should write for scooby doo fr. and i also love the desperation of trying to distract someone from inevitable horror without giving away your gay love in a POW camp. idk it’s just fun

“Remember when you thought you saw a ghost in England?”

“Did not,” Gale says. His breathing isn’t quite right. Restrained and sharp, but John can tell he’s trying.

“You did,” John presses on. Buck turns his head a little, the anticipation of going untouched clearly building, but John takes his chin between his thumb and forefinger, brings him back around to look at him. “You woke me up at Christ knows what time. I never seen you so frantic, I thought you were finally drunk. And you shook me awake, oh, Bucky, I saw somethin’. Oh, Bucky, I swear it was movin’ through the north side barracks.” Gale blinks slowly, huffs out a small laugh. “And I thought you’d gone crazy. ’Cos Buck Cleven, he told me he don’t believe in any of that bushwa first day I met him, when I told you my grandma used to post up in Ma’s house when she was already long gone.”

“Didn’t see no ghost, John,” Gale says. John knows he can sense Doc moving beside him, now. He’s gone tense, chest rising and falling with gaining speed.

“Hey, Buck, hey,” John says, trying desperately to pull his attention back to him. Gale meets his eyes, and John is hopeless to combat the panic in them. “I know you didn’t. Remember what it was, huh? Remember?”

“Meatball,” Gale says, barely audible.

“Fuckin’ Meatball. Got into the pantry and brought a whole bag of flour down on him. He looked ghostly, I’ll give ya that-”

John is cut off when Gale screams. He has never heard a sound like it from another human being.

15. If you could choose one of your fics to be filmed, which would you choose?

Superstar. it’s literally me and elo’s prestige show. other than that this must be the place bc i love to see austin in pain

[technicolorfamiliar]

The Wandering Jew Dir. Maurice Elvey 1933

[Note: This film along with 1934's Jew Süss set Conrad Veidt apart from many of his German film actor peers. While he was not Jewish, many of his close friends and colleagues -- not to mention his wife Lily -- were, and he was committed to portraying these deeply complicated and sympathetic characters with as much care and empathy as humanly possible. You can see it in his performance. These films are what got his work banned in Germany in the '30s and painted a huge target on his back. Later he would double down and donate most of his acting paychecks to the British war effort, and arrange to help friends and family who were in danger of violence in Germany safely get out of the country. Maybe it's not necessary to mention all this, but just in case I want to make it abundantly clear where he stood.]

When I first saw this movie about a year ago, I couldn't get into it. It didn't help that I only watched the shorter version on Youtube. The poor quality of the picture and audio, plus a mostly terrible cast, made it a tough watch. But I wanted to give The Wandering Jew a second chance, if only for the Conrad Veidt of it all, and I'm glad I did. So over the course of the first weekend in November, I watched both versions: the shorter, much-censored version and the digitally restored version with over 20 minutes of additional material.

---

After watching the two existing/available copies of the film, I definitely think both are necessary if you want to get the whole picture.

Unfortunately, the shorter version is in semi-rough shape and the audio is pretty garbled, but the edits are smoother which helps individual scenes and lines make more sense. There's more air in this version; the director clearly wanted to give the actors, especially Connie, room to breathe, and it not only helps the pacing but the atmosphere of the film as well. However, the shorter version is missing several important and interesting moments due to some heavy-handed censorship.

The longer version has a cleaner picture and slightly clearer audio, but some of the dialogue gets randomly chopped up and there are abrupt cuts that make the film jumpy and take away from the languid atmospheric feeling that in retrospect I think actually makes the film work. Or at least tries to make it work. And, being the longer version, there are key scenes that made it past the censors: all the scenes related to leprosy; the aggressive anti-semitic stuff at the Renaissance Faire crusaders camp; and a great line Matathias delivers in an added scene in Act IV, "All men are Christians. All men are Jews. The faith is only a mask, it does not make a man what he is." MIC DROP, AIR HORNS. There's also a wild scene where Renaissance Faire crusade era Matathias cackles at Anne Grey's crucifix for well over a minute. But for whatever reason, the longer version is missing random things too, like the forward, which isn't entirely necessary but if you're presenting your film in a kind of storybook style, a written forward makes sense.

And there is an illustrative, storybook quality to the film. The costumes and sets feel like something out of a N.C. Wyeth painting or even vaguely Pre-Raphaelite at times. It's heavily romanticized and I think this threw me the first time I saw the movie. But it makes sense, the story is a parable after all. And yet, while you're going in that direction, why not go bigger, why not compose each shot with even more care? I know they shot this movie in 1933, but all I want is some vision and intentionality in the cinematography and staging, dang it! I do like the two moments when Jesus is speaking and his dialogue is only shown as text. We don't see or hear him, but everyone else in the shot is frozen and the sound drops out. Time seems to stop for a few seconds. But nothing else in the film really manages to match those moments stylistically.

I feel like a broken record saying this, but Connie's performance once again carries the entire film. Pretty much everyone else is just so bad, the women in particular. Seriously, sound was being used in films at this point for over 5 years -- so why is everyone in this movie doing this style of acting that is maybe only acceptable for huge stage productions? Three of the four lead actresses are legitimately the worst. The only exception is Peggy Ashcroft in Act IV who isn't great, but at least she's a better scene partner. That could also have something to do with the first three women being annoyingly pious, and Act IV's Olalla is just a more interesting and better-written character. In Act I, the woman playing Judith barely engages with Connie. Sure, she's dying, but she's dying like she's on stage in some 2000+ seat West End theater. And the wife in Act III is literally giving Connie nothing to work with, nothing! There's so little believable intimacy in these women's performances that it really makes the movie suffer as a whole. Maybe that's harsh, maybe that's what the director wanted, but I think about Connie's other British films from this time and their lead actresses -- Madeleine Carroll, Jill Esmond, etc -- weren't nearly as painfully awful.

Though this is Connie's fifth English language film, it almost seems like he's still getting his sea legs as an actor in the British studio system. Maybe with the exception of I Was A Spy, his previous English films were all roles for a character actor, and so Matathias was the first opportunity he had to really show off his range. I have no idea if they shot in sequence -- unlikely -- but from Act I to Act IV he seems like he's progressively carving out a foundation for his future work in British films. After The Wandering Jew, he was off and running with a great series of meaty and fascinating roles. Josef Süss, The Stranger, even Convict 83 have some roots in the performance he gives in this movie.

Matathias is a role an actor would consider one of their crowning achievements but would probably never want to play again. He's incredibly demanding and challenging, very likely made even more so by Connie's uniquely holistic and intense method of preparing for a role. Even though there are moments when his performance comes across as a little stilted, that could be more due to him trying to match the tone of the film itself, especially early in the narrative when he's a little flat -- he has to start like that so he has somewhere to go with the character. There's zero humor or levity in the script so Connie had to humanize Matathias through his journey across time by incorporating moments of deep compassion and the pain of loss, shame and regret, and ultimately complete surrender.

No other actor would believe the story and its message enough to pull off the heart-wrenching performance Connie gives in this film.

Act I Matathias is a difficult guy in a fabulous robe (the sleeves!). He's clearly selfish, but not really cruel. After all, he and everyone else know that the woman he loves does not belong to him and were she to go home to her husband, she would most definitely not survive whatever violence awaited her there. And Matathias does not allow harm to come to her, at least not in that way. His selfishness means he'll keep her at any cost, meaning he refuses to see how ill she really is. But he's not a bad guy, he's just a regular person in a very difficult situation which makes his impulse to bitterly lash out at Christ understandable. But there is some part of him that does believe because it doesn’t take much for him to get on board with the whole curse thing. With very little convincing, he appears to be resigned to his fate. But that's fine, we have to move the story along, after all.

The cruelty comes out more in Act II. The Unknown Knight just wants to fight, feast, and get his freak on. Connie gets to be pretty aggressively sexual (good god, the way he grabs that woman) and blasphemous in this section ("Blasphamy, blaspha-you, blaspha-everybody in the room!"), especially for the early 1930s, so no wonder it's one of the shorter acts. His haircut might be hideous, but his veiny forearms are, uh, real nice (as are all the long shots of his exposed throat and sternum throughout the film). Confession time: it took me three viewings to get the whole leprosy thing. Judith has it in Act I, so does the guy who wanders into the camp in Act II, and the sick boy in Act IV as well. The son in Act III is bit by a snake, but it could be something to do with snakes = the devil or something, idk. The appearance of sickness/leprosy always signals a lesson Matathias has to learn, or signals the ending or beginning of something important. So his reaction to Renaissance Faire Babe's rejection isn't really about her at all, which is revealed in the longer edit of the film. He hears the leper's bell and mutters, "Unclean…," before letting Ren Faire Babe discover her murdered husband. Matathias may not have killed the man, but he continues to leave behind a trail of death and destruction as some kind of act of defiance against the curse of wandering the earth until such undetermined time as Jesus will appear to him again. By making his life dangerous, he flaunts how he is able to cheat death, but when he hears the leper's bell and is reminded of the events that set him on this path, he realizes he can't go on like this, that there has to be something else, something more. I like how the shot of Connie at the end of this section echoes the end of Act I, suggesting he still has a long journey ahead before he can hope to reach own end.

So when we next see him, he's a merchant and family man living in Palermo named Matteo. Instead of causing mayhem everywhere he goes, he's trying to build something, maybe even a legacy. This is my least favorite part of the movie, but the way Connie shows Matteo's heartbreak, first at the death of his son and later at losing his wife to the Church, is something else. When Gianella tells him she's leaving, he goes through each of the stages of grief in like two minutes and we can see it happen in his face and in his body language. The way his knees buckle and he slowly crumples to the floor, ugh. Also, shout out to the attention to detail in this film. If you look closely at the beginning of Act III, Connie's fingernails look ink-stained like he's been writing and handling documents all day. Not to mention the fact that he wears the same onyx ring throughout, and the same necklace in Acts I and IV. I also thought it was interesting how the music cut out when Mateo is handed his dying child, it immediately reinforces the gravity of the scene. This movie did not come to play.

Act IV, set in Seville, is by far the best part of the whole film. And I'm not just saying that because Care-giver!Connie is doing things to my brain. How sweet and gentle he is with his patients, the way he keeps looking up to check in with Olalla when he's treating her broken ankle, the way he murmurs and coos little things under his breath like "Come on, let's try a little walk…" and "Ohh, what's the matter, my boy" that sound totally improvised. That's the good stuff, right there. And when Olalla says, "There's magic in your hands." I BET. This whole fourth act is just Connie kicking in the door of 1930s British cinema. The scene in front of the Inquisition alone is the most powerful and important part of the movie. Connie manages to fill Matteo with such humanity and empathy by the end of the film that it's practically radiating out of him. In an otherwise one-dimensional film he brings real, complicated, fascinating, tragic and beautiful life to this legendary figure. It's astonishing.

Is it a good movie? Not really. Is it an important movie made at a critical time in history, as a statement against anti-semitism on behalf of the filmmakers and cast? Of course it is. Despite the mild annoyance of needing to watch two different versions of the same film, and needing some patience with the tone and supporting cast's performances -- it definitely helps to be in the right mood going in -- it really is essential viewing in the Conrad Veidt canon, especially if you're interested in his work as an actor. I mean, just watch this movie and bask in the glow of his radiant, spiritual performance. Bask in it!

In the end, I'm glad I gave 1933's The Wandering Jew a second chance.

P.S. Connie looks unbelievably stunning in this movie. His costumes, wigs and facial hair are all basically perfect. The silhouettes and lines of his robes, the details in his jewelry and accessories. He really knew how to wear the clothes so they wouldn't wear him. He must have been a costume designer's dream. Or nightmare (he can be your angle;;… or yuor devil).

[d-8tober]

D8Tober Prompt List (Long Version)

FAQ for the event is available here and the prompts-only version is available here

The Shining

Characters facing an extended period of isolation together, such as a deserted island or a snowed-in building

One of a bazillion movies based off Stephen King stories. A family goes to take care of a haunted hotel for the winter, trapping them with each other. There's probably three movies on this list that are genuine indisputable classics not just within horror but also for movies in general; this is the first of those three. If you haven't seen it, I'd recommend it just for the level of cultural references that depend on it even now.

Do you recommend it?

Absolutely.

Are there sequels?

There's a tv miniseries version made because Stephen King notoriously hated both the Kubrick version and Kubrick himself; it's a soulless mess. There's also a direct sequel made just a few years ago that tries to be a followup both to the King novel version and the Kubrick movie, Doctor Sleep; it got a little overlooked from some bad timing on the release but it's actually incredible and I HIGHLY recommend it.

Saw

Characters making a difficult choice or a required sacrifice.

If you're not a horror fan and you've heard of Saw, you've probably heard it called torture porn. That's a reputation that's almost entirely earned by the sequels, however - the original Saw is a hyper-low budget movie that borders more on thriller than horror, starring Cary Elwes (of Princess Bride and Robin Hood: Men in Tights fame) doing what may be the worst American accent in the history of movies. It's a very grimy movie, for certain, but it's also kind of a taut little mystery.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, though not that strongly.

Are there sequels?

Yes, and they're where the series gets its reputation. The movies involve a theoretically continuous plotline, and they manage to get incredibly convoluted and also increasingly gorey. Personally, I'd recommend just stopping after the first one.

Pet Semetary

A character's favorite pet or other animal.

Another King story, and also a book the man himself claims he can't remember writing and thinks is his most miserable story. I don't think either of the two movie version are that good, but they can be okay - I can't even talk about them without giving away the most major twist, really.

Do you recommend it?

Not really, but it's not actively terrible.

Are there sequels?

There's a recent remake, and the original movie had a truly awful sequel. I'm also told there was a direct-to-Paramount+ prequel to the remake, which I'm sure is every bit the quality that you could expect from a direct to C-tier streaming service horror movie prequel.

Suspiria

Characters exploring dance.

Technically I'm talking about the 70s Italian version here, which is a fever dream of a film made in a style in which all the actors spoke in their various native languages on set and then were overdubbed for all versions of the movie. Taking place in a dance boarding school run by witches, the script was originally written envisioning the students to be children in the 10-12 range and then cast with them as college-aged but without changing any of the dialogue, which honestly just makes it more unsettling. It's stylish as hell.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, but if you're looking for something SLIGHTLY less weird to most modern audiences maybe go for the remake first and loop back.

Are there sequels?

As mentioned, there's a very recent remake that basically takes the framework of dance boarding school run by witches and abandons the rest. There's much more emphasis put on dance (and rather less on 70s progressive rock music) but it has a style all its own. I love both versions, but I slightly prefer the original myself.

The Thing

An imposter; a character replaced by a foe unknowingly.

I'm talking about the 1982 version here; as someone who was born in the 80s but is mostly not on board with 80s nostalgia shit at ALL I make a lone exception for the works of John Carpenter. Taking place at an Antarctic research station, this movie is both known for its paranoia-inducing plot and its incredibly detailed special practical effects. Among Us is 100% not based off this movie, they promise.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, wholeheartedly.

Are there sequels?

There's a prequel from the mid 2010s that basically uses the exact same plot but replaces the practical effects with CGI (which has already aged poorly) and has less interesting characters overall. It's not the worst thing in the world - the plot is good! - but why watch it when you could just watch the 1982 version instead?

Friday the 13th

Violence without glory or mercy.

There are a million of these, of course, featuring Jason Vorhees murdering a bunch of people in various sometimes-creative but usually not fashions. The original isn't that, though; it's a cheap Halloween knockoff with boring kills, shoddy acting, and maybe the world's worst who-dun-it mystery. (Jason is not the killer and in fact never really appears.)

Do you recommend it?

Absolutely not.

Are there sequels?

There are SO MANY sequels. None of them climb all the way up to good, though most are at least a little better than the original; personally the one I enjoy the most is Jason X, the one in space, which at least is aware of how fucking bad it is and dances in the sewage a bit.

Scream

A metatextual story or image.

Breathing some fresh air into horror in the mid-90s after like fifteen years of the same stale slasher series limping along, Scream still holds up quite well today - I watched it last year. The cold open of the movie alone would be an incredible short horror film. Also, it's the first R-rated movie I saw in theaters, at far too young an age to probably be watching it in theaters (I was 10). Movie theaters really didn't give a shit before Columbine happened, I have to tell you.

Do you recommend it?

A strong yes. Genuinely, as a writer, there's a lot to learn in this movie, which is VERY funny without actually being a horror-comedy.

Are there sequels?

Yes; none of them are as good as the original, but none of them are BAD necessarily.

You're Next

Betrayal from a beloved one.

A home invasion movie where it turns out the main character and designated final girl to be grew up with survivalists and is WAY prepared for a situation where people are trying to murder the shit out of her.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, though it's a milder recommendation than some of the others on the list. The violence in this one is a little more realistic than many of the others, as well, so know that going in.

Are there sequels?

Nope, this one's a pure stand-alone.

Alien

Placing profits above safety; an anti-capitalist message

A crew of a spaceship finds they have an unwanted stowaway. Actually, multiple ones. Honestly the idea that someone in circumstances to be reading this wouldn't at least have a vague idea what happens in this movie is baffling to me.

Do you recommend it?

YES. Yes, yes, yes. This may be one of the twenty or thirty best movies ever made, and made 45 years ago or not it still LOOKS great.

Are there sequels?

Bunches, in complicated branches that would require flowcharts to fully explain. Aliens, the most direct sequel, might actually be better even though Alien is one of the best movies of all time in my books; after that, it drops off in a hurry but if you want more and an expanded universe and all then hey, you've got that going for you.

An American Werewolf in London

Werewolves! Either all characters are, or one is newly turned into one.

A comedy-horror that is more or less what it says in the title; an American in London gets bitten by what locals definitely won't admit is a werewolf, and then things happen.

Do you recommend it?

Eeeeh. The movie itself is okay, not great. The director is a, ah, controversial figure MOSTLY known for his work with comedies and also his work in running unsafe sets that got actors harmed or killed, including two children and one adult on the set of the Twilight Zone movie; unfortunately, he also made a number of movies that ARE legitimately classics of my childhood, this just isn't one of them. I just wanted a movie where I could prompt werewolves. Werewolves are great.

Are there sequels?

There's one, An American Werewolf in Paris, which involves none of the same people and is actively terrible.

Freaky

Body swap two or more characters

The movie was pitched as Freaky Friday but instead of getting swapped with her mom the main high school character gets body swapped with a slasher movie killer, played by Vince Vaughn. Legitimately this one's a lot of fun, made by the same people who made the Groundhog's Day inspired Happy Death Day, and also it's VERY bloody.

Do you recommend it?

This one was literally the Halloween recommendation I gave my mom last year.

Are there sequels?

No, at least not yet.

Evil Dead

Characters not leaving well enough alone, and pushing into danger from curiosity.

A very classic 'group goes to an isolated place and then dies one by one' kind of movie, this was Sam Raimi's first movie, starring his college buddy Bruce Campbell. There's a lot of genius in this, but it also does have some real rough spots, and in some ways is basically a student film.

Do you recommend it?

Honestly for most new viewers I'd recommend skipping to the second one, which basically remakes the first one for the first half and then continues from there. There's a lot of filmmaking brilliance on display in a much less raw but still campy state in Evil Dead 2.

Are there sequels?

Yes, even beyond the second one there are several plus a TV show. Army of Darkness and the TV show are more fantasy adventure comedy things, and a lot of fun; the remake and the recent sequel to the remake, on the other hand, cut out all the campy humor elements of the original and play them straight horror and end up being pretty divisive as a result. I recommend everything in the series, though.

It Follows

Characters regretting a relationship

A remarkably low death count on screen in this one, which is a tense movie about a shapeshifting monster that gets passed off STD-style and steadily walks towards the current target, killing them if they catch up but moving on to stalking their partner if they hook up first. Features a memorable score, in particular, enough so that I'm mentioning it here.

Do you recommend it?

Lukewarmly yes; it's good, but I don't think it's great. This one's got a real cult following, though, which led to…

Are there sequels?

There's one coming out soon, titled "They Follow". Horror movies get sequels relatively easily - they tend to be cheap to make and while they generally don't do gangbusters at the box office they usually do okay - but I have to admit I didn't think one was coming for this.

Final Destination

One or more characters fighting against destiny

The premise on this one is pretty famous, and while this isn't the first story ever to use it by a long shot it's probably the most well known: After seeing a vision of the future where he and a bunch of other people die, the main character takes action to prevent it. Only, it turns out that death doesn't like to be cheated, and the survivors start dying in mysterious and bizarre circumstances…

Do you recommend it?

This entirely comes down to one thing: Does the idea of repeated scenes of people either dying or nearly dying in tremendously Rube Goldberg-esque fashions appeal to you? If so, then absolutely yes, even though the acting is overall VERY late 90s teen drama.

Are there sequels?

Yes, four of them, and most of them are pretty good in the category of fun deathtraps. The second one's 'mass death vision' scene, in particular, is a traffic accident scene that genuinely probably causes multiple millions of people to avoid following behind log trucks. Avoid the 3-d one, but the last one and the first three are all fun if it's your thing.

Reanimator

Characters attempting to bring back a dead friend

Extremely loosely based off an HP Lovecraft story, but don't let that stop you from watching this science gone wrong film about a researcher attempting to bring the dead back to life. Honestly, just that is enough that you know a lot of where this is going, but do exercise caution - it's VERY 80s and also VERY gorey. Also, and the fact that I'm giving this warning in this article when I haven't on several other films means you should take it seriously, if you're sex repulsed stay far, far away from this one.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, assuming you can tolerate those warnings in the above paragraph. Barbara Crampton and Jeffrey Combs are great.

Are there sequels?

Yes, two of them. There was also apparently a Broadway adaptation in the early 2010s so those of you with tastes in that might be able to track down a cast recording or something?

Candyman

Characters fighting against someone seeking revenge for the sins of their ancestors

One of the few decent 90s pre-Scream horror movies, this one features a researcher in urban myths going into a housing project in Chicago and seeking information on the titular Candyman. She finds him.

Do you recommend it?

Yes; it's a very good movie, though there's a pretty heavy social message aspect (both racism and feminism are major points within the film) to it that is at times ham-fisted. It means well, but I'll leave it to the viewer to judge on that front the quality.

Are there sequels?

Yes, and they're dogshit slashers that lose everything good about the original except for Tony Todd playing the villain. There's also a more recent reboot, but I have not seen that one.

Ready or Not

Characters playing a childhood game.

A comedic horror movie, this one features a game of hide or seek and some of the world's worst in-laws. There's some GREAT props and stuff if you're into board games at all, and honestly you're on a dimension 20 promptlist so there's a decent chance you are.

Do you recommend it?

Strongly so, yes. The ending is particularly memorable.

Are there sequels?

No, and there better NOT be any either.

Sinister

Discovering records of past tragedies, such as a journal, photograph, or film.

A fine member of the long tradition of horror movies where the secret villain is the protagonist (see also the Shining, though it's even less of a secret there), this is a haunted house movie with a nasty twist. Very much in the jump scare vein of movies so if you're not into that, maybe give this one a past, though unlike its near-contemporary in the jumpscare heavy front of the Conjuring movies this one's got the FULL courage of its convictions to actually follow through on some of them - this is a nasty, bloody movie.

Do you recommend it?

If you're okay with a nasty, bloody movie then yes. I'm not exactly sure what sent Ethan Hawke on the road to where he's ended up in a bunch of movies like this, but he's good as the aforementioned protagonist.

Are there sequels?

There's one, which is weirdly easier to find on streaming than the original. It's not very good, but I've seen worse.

Tucker and Dale VS Evil

The kindness of strangers in the face of the unkindness of those once thought friends

Another horror comedy, this one turns one of my absolute least favorite tropes of hillbilly murderers on its head, and is purely a (bloody) comedy of errors for the vast majority of the runtime.

Do you recommend it?

Yes.

Are there sequels?

No; filming conditions on set were apparently bad enough that there's basically no possibility anyone would come back for it, and the movie wasn't a huge financial success even though it's become something of a cult classic.

Midsommar

A relationship continuing past when it should have ended; the failure of inaction.

An extended exercise in misery dressed up in spring tones, this is the only movie on this list I remember actually getting specifically called out during a D20 episode - Aabria talks about going full Midsommar at the start of ACoFaF, which it is something of the look if not AT ALL the tone. This one's a cult movie. Not, like, a cult classic - it's literally a movie about a cult.

Do you recommend it?

It's a great movie, but it's also HEAVY. If you're in the mood for that then absolutely go for it, if you're not then maybe wait for more cheerful days.

Are there sequels?

No, and I can't imagine anyone involved making a followup.

The Lighthouse

A character assuming another's identity.

There are people who would try to make the case that this is actually not a horror movie and I think that's fair. This is the same director as The Witch, and it's a very specific style for this movie up to and including it being in black and white and the accents that the two actors (the ONLY two actors) choose to take on. If you're into Greek mythology, see when you figure out which myth this is a reference to as a fun little minigame.

Do you recommend it?

I… kind of? If you think you'd be into a period piece with two actors in black and white that also features a shockingly high amount of talk about various biological functions, go for it.

Are there sequels?

Good god, no.

Hereditary

A character's bloodline being cursed in a mysterious way.

This one was a big hit a few years ago, and is half horror movie, half family tragi-drama, and all miserable. It's not the scariest movie on this list by any means, but it is in rare company on my personal list of things I recommend watching once and then never again. (Total Forgiveness is actually also on this list.)

Do you recommend it?

Yes, unless you have already seen it, in which case no.

Are there sequels?

Midsommar is the same director and in spite of an almost opposite aesthetic inherits much of the ethos of misery, but no, not really.

Phantasm

Dealing with a character's corpse, either to reanimate it or bury it.

One of the WEIRDER entries on this list, Phantasm is a late 70s film featuring a truly great villain known only as the Tall Man, who steals corpses and reanimates them as slave zombies back in his home dimension and honestly it just gets a little odder from there. His main opposition is a like ten year old kid.

Do you recommend it?

I can't say I DON'T recommend it but I probably wouldn't put it high on the list of things I would recommend to people partly because unless they're deep into weird movies themselves they're going to look at me like I'm crazy after they watch this on my recommendation.

Are there sequels?

Yes, and they form an allegedly continuous story and feature mostly the same actors - that original movie was an indie production in the freaking 70s and cost less than many houses to make, returning something like a hundred and fifty times its budget. The first sequel is probably the best movie in the series; the later ones kind of lost what plot there was.

The Ring

Impending death, to one's self or another.

A mysterious tape leads to death seven days after you watch it - this is probably one of the best-known and most-parodied movies on this list, to the point where I'd be a little surprised if even the younger audience hadn't at least HEARD of it even though it's somewhat older now.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, either this version or the Japanese version (which is the original; this is one of a string of American remakes of Japanese horror movies from around this time, and definitely the best of them.)

Are there sequels?

There are sprawling franchises in BOTH the US and Japan around this, with substantial differences in the lore and varying degrees of sucking. Personally, I'd just stick to the original two movies, but all the rest of it has fans certainly.

Child's Play

A character's favorite childhood toys.

A serial killer gets shot down by a cop and possesses a doll, but wants to steal a real body back. In contrast to what the sequels eventually became, the original is much less comedic, with a lot of practical effects around the doll - who in spite of being a serial killer has to play it smart because he's a doll, at least in this one. Chucky gets a lot of his superhuman abilities later on in the series; in the original it's mostly a deception play.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, the first two movies in particular here are quite good.

Are there sequels?

Buckle up, because this one's a long runner - this series has a continuous timeline spanning like eight movies and three seasons of television, with more still forthcoming. There's also a reboot that basically is in name only and also is bad.

Dracula

Vampires! Either all characters are vampires or one is turned into one.

I mean, it's Dracula. Do you seriously need me to explain to you on tumblr.com what Dracula is?

Do you recommend it?

It here being the original Bela Legusi Universal movie? Sure, as long as you know that's what it is - this thing's damn near a hundred years old at this point.

Are there sequels?

Yes, and a million different versions of this story.

Nightmare on Elm Street

A work focused on a character's dreams.

A school janitor who may or may not have been committing sexual assault on children - it's implied in the original that he wasn't and it was a witch hunt from the parents in the style of the satanic panic of the time; in the remake he absolutely was - has regardless become a demon who haunts the children of the parents who killed him and murders them in their dreams. One of the great 80s slasher franchises.

Do you recommend it?

Yes; it's the best of the 80s slasher franchises, at least in the first movie or two before Freddie descends into full clownhood.

Are there sequels?

Yeah, a whole bunch of varying quality, including a deeply weird one in New Nightmare which is effectively RPF of the first movie except instead of Real Person Fanfiction it's just Real Person Fiction.

It

A work focused on the character's greatest fears.

Yet another Stephen King story, this one features a creature from beyond space and time who comes up every so often to murder the shit out of people and especially kids while taking the form of their worst fear to do it. Tim Curry plays the clown in the miniseries in one of his most well known roles, and again this was a MADE FOR TV MINISERIES that broadcast on network television and is one of TIM CURRY'S best known roles. He's by far the best part of it.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, I recommend it. And It.

Are there sequels?

I suppose we can mention the much more recent theatrical movies, which split the childhood and adulthood portions more firmly into two films and also made literally over a billion dollars between the two of them. I've never seen them, though. There's only room for Tim Curry to clown around in my heart.

Jaws A beach episode! Beach-inspired fic or pic.

THE shark movie of all time, and also the movie that singlehandedly created the concept of a summer blockbuster movie, and ALSO the movie that kicked off Steven Spielberg's career and in spite of all of those things it's also genuinely incredibly good.

Do you recommend it?

If you somehow haven't seen this you should watch it the next time you have two hours to kill; this is a genuine classic work of art in popular filmmaking and also you'll suddenly understand a thousand cultural references you've been missing.

Are there sequels?

Yes, three of them, and they're increasing levels of bad. The second one rehashes the first but does a shittier job; the third one is IN THREE-D and that was the only reason they made it, and the fourth one features a telepathic shark that stalks the family of the sheriff from the first movie to the Bahamas out of wanting revenge for the murder of that shark but is both worse and more boring than this description makes it sound.

The Fly

A character going through an unwanted physical change.

Did you know Jeff Goldblum was hot once upon a time, and also like, genuinely ripped? This movie absolutely shows that off and then desperately makes you wish it hadn't. Another classic, though not really for the weak of stomach - a lot of real body horror in this one, so buckle in if you're going to give it a watch. I miss practical effects.

Do you recommend it?

Yes, though if you're on an older movie kick and haven't seen a lot of these the other older movies on this list are mostly better. Unless you're genuinely curious to see Jeff Goldblum as a sex symbol, in which case hey, go nuts. Also fun fact - this movie was still in a few budget theaters on the day I was born, though it was far behind the #1 movie in America, Crocodile Dundee. I'm mostly bringing that up because it invariably makes the Australians in my life flinch.

Are there sequels?

There's one, which I've never seen and which certainly doesn't involve either David Cronenberg or Jeff Goldblum. It is by most accounts quite bad. Also, technically, this one's a remake to begin with and there's a 50's version but I'm not counting that one - the difference between a movie from 1955 and one from 1980, even though they were only 25 years apart, are VASTLY greater than the differences between a movie from 1980 and today even though that's almost 45 years.

A Bay of Blood

A comedy of errors, with deadly or painful results.

Another foreign film, and kind of a proto-slasher, this one involves a real estate deal gone bad, family feuds, accidents, a whole lot of deaths, and some gratuitous nudity. It's basically like Friday the 13th in some ways except actually fun, assuming you're into that kind of thing. Definitely cheesy though.

Do you recommend it?

Eeeeeeeeeeh. If you're into schlock and cheese and people getting murdered in the middle of sex (not, generally, by the person they're involved with) then you could do a lot worse.

Are there sequels?

Not direct ones.

[ekingston]

Hello! for the writing ask thingy.

15, 23 & 25. Have a good day!

hi! i did, i hope the same is true for you!

What's your favourite plotless fic you have written?

i honestly don’t think i’ve ever written or read a story that had no plot at all! even the pwp tag i feel is often a misnomer. doesn’t identifying desire->acting on said desire->climax and resolution follow a fairly traditional structure? you tell me, i’m genuinely asking! maybe i’m just too easy?

Dialogue or description? Why is the other one so hard?

i enjoy both! i think the trick to making dialogue happen without feeling like you’re forcing every word is making sure all of your characters have their own take on the situation, remembering their interest regarding the outcome is (at least slightly) different for all of them, and giving each character their own distinct (& distinctive) voice. and as far as description goes, i think it’s mostly in the so-called economy of language—trying to convey as much information as possible in as few (vivid) words as you can, which i think requires a lot of patient practice but can also be a really fun challenge!

Is writing the whole thing beforehand better or worse than writing it as you go?

gosh i don’t know, i imagine it works differently for everyone! i think i’m in my happiest place when i feel like the words are coming so fast that i barely have time to figure out how they all fit into any sort of plot, and have it kind of catch up to me as i go along. but i very rarely feel things flow that easily, so usually it does help to give myself a sturdy outline to follow along and flesh out!

[serenaoffaerun]

A random idea for a long time from now...

Trying to get some wheels turning on something other than current events. I have a loose idea of a bigger project I'm going to write a little ways down the road, after I do a run of BG3 as a wizard romancing Gale. Mostly based on the events of BG3, but I'm taking whatever liberties I dang well please, including flipping some dialogue and fucking with the timeline. 😉 I've finished the game twice, about to finish it a third time, I have an on-stream run on Twitch in act 3, and I started at least half a dozen others.

What I know about this project:

Trinity is a wizard, mid-30s, human, long dark hair, violet eyes.

She was left somewhere as a baby, I don't know where that is yet, but she's essentially an orphan.

Her name will mean something significant to her lineage, I just don't know what yet.

She and Gale will be hopelessly in love, I may push it up earlier in the timeline. Love at first sight will play into it, which is what you're about to read.

There will eventually be much smut, so send the kiddos away.

Disclaimer: I haven't written in a long time. I'm planning on dipping my toe in with some one-shots before I start on this long-form piece, but I need to get some ideas out there.

This is starting in the middle of the beginning events, so it's lacking some context, but it's basically Trinity on her own finding Gale's arm flailing out of the malfunctioning portal.

------------------------------------

Eyes clenched and teeth gritted, Trinity yanked one more time on the arm with all her strength. As she was about to stop and regain her strength, there was a yell and a sudden lack of resistance before she went tumbling backwards onto the hard dirt behind her. She felt an impact on both sides of her body, with multiple "OOFs" filling the air.

She opened her eyes, or at least she thought she did. As she regained her senses, she found herself surrounded by darkness, labored breathing, and...lavender? Trinity realized the man attached to the purple-clothed arm had been successfully yanked from the portal with enough momentum that she was flat on her back, his weight fully pressing down on her.

With a pained grunt, the man pushed himself up onto his palms so that she could breathe. He looked down and her vision was suddenly filled with long, brown hair falling in loose waves, a neatly-trimmed beard, and warm, chocolate eyes that stared back at her. Eyes that pulled a barely audible 'gasp' from her mouth as she saw concern, shock, embarrassment, and kindness conveyed all at once. She noticed the gold flecks that shone in them like stars and knew instantly that she could remain lost in them for hours.

His labored breathing mixed together the scent that clung to his clothing with his natural musk and the soapy clean smell of his hair. It was heavenly. Not only did she detect lavender, but a woody smell like rich mahogany, with hints of incense. It also hadn't escaped her that their lower bodies were a tangle of legs and wizard's robes...

"Oh, my, I am so sorry," he said, still catching his breath. "It seems gravity took its toll on us there, didn't it?" A sheepish smile flashed across his face as he pushed himself to his feet. He dusted off his knees and extended both of his hands to pull her up, but was only met with wide, violet eyes, blinking up at him.

Trinity's mind blanked. She felt her cheeks flush, but those tender brown eyes that seemed to hold the wisdom of ages had rendered her completely speechless. 'This is when one would speak, yes?' she thought to herself. 'Of course, Trin, that's what people would normally do when spoken to. Pull yourself together.' she scolded back. But try as she might, she couldn't seem to form anything resembling a word. She just stared at those beautiful eyes, mouth slightly agape, inhaling his intoxicating scent.

"Are you alright? I hope I didn't injure you... I'm Gale. Gale of Waterdeep." Trinity slammed her eyes shut to break the hold he unwittingly had over her and shook her head a few times, snapping herself out of her trance.

Propping herself up on her elbows, she finally managed to get out, "Yes, sorry, no, I'm fine, sorry..."

Gale walked around beside her, leaned in and gently grasped an elbow with one hand, the other behind her back.

"Okay now, up you go," he said as he helped her stand and steady herself.

She brushed off her robes, still flushed in the face, and stammered, "S-sorry, I'm usually, uh, much better at this..."

"Better at what? Pulling a distressed wizard from a magically malfunctioning portal? How many of those have you come across, exactly?" he chuckled with a heart-melting smile, looking her over for obvious signs of injury.

"No, no, sorry... Introductions. I'm usually much better at introductions," she giggled. Her confidence found her again as she extended her hand. "Trinity. My name's Trinity."

Gale held her hand in both of his. It was warm, somehow both calloused and soft at the same time, likely the result of self-care along with the toll that spellcasting took on one's hands. He observed the woman standing before him and noticed a myriad of details at once. The flush of her cheeks. The purple highlights of hair that were sprinkled into a curtain of raven black around her shoulders and down her waist. A rip in one of the sleeves of her robe, unlikely to be caused just by being knocked back into the dirt. She looked like she'd recently been in a battle, dirt and blood mixed on the hem of her robe.

Above all that, he found himself instantly locked into her eyes. Pools of deep violet that seemed to contain strands of moonlight shimmer. There was a depth that immediately pulled him into feeling of comfort and ease that he'd seldom felt with another person. Certainly not in a very long time; years, even. All he'd known in recent years was the cold, harsh gaze of a goddess scorned and the glare of mothering tressym eyes during his last year of solitude.

As Gale was about to take a deep breath to release the anxiety building in his chest, he heard her voice coming back into focus. He realized she had asked him a question.

"I...I'm sorry, I'm still collecting myself, it seems," Gale said, chuckling awkwardly while blinking rapidly to hide how lost he'd gotten in her eyes. "What what is you were asking?"

Trinity tilted her head to the side slightly, "I asked if you were alright. I've never known someone to get stuck in a magical portal before. It must have been quite the shock."

She winced as she realized her groan-worthy, unintentional pun, recalling the electricity spasming from the rock just moments ago.

To her relief, he chuckled, then said "I'm quite alright, I assure you. I've been assaulted by much more than a bit of electricity in my day, believe you me."

Now it was Gale's turn to blush as he realized he was still holding her hand. He bowed forward slightly to cover his embarrassment.

"Trinity, it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, especially on this most bewildering of days," he said, dropping her hand as he stood up.

She huffed and replied, "Oh, I've had quite the day myself, let me tell you..."

-------------------------------

Well that was way longer than I anticipated. Good to see I'm as nit-picky with my words as I am with my artwork? This'll go fiiiiiine lol. More on this story in the future, but we'll see about getting some smutty, sultry one-shots out into the universe before too long 😉

[xoxo-ren-xoxo]

What the Hell is Comms AU?!

Well first of all, Comms AU is a Hermitcraft fic I am writing. If you want to go into it blind, then the link is here!

[also, hey, if you like it, perhaps consider reblogging this post ;) ]

But if you'd like to know a little more before diving into it, I've decided to compile a fun little resource introducing the fic, its format, some of the most basic pieces of lore (so very mild spoilers, but it is stuff you would pick up on by chapter 3 or 4, honestly!) and a few tidbits about the characters. BELOW!

What the hell is Comms AU (For real this time)

I started Comms AU (full name INCOMING MESSAGE - COMM RECORDS) back in the middle of 2023, after reading some really great fics like the From The Archives series. It is a multiverse drama first and foremost, with elements of horror, betrayal, personal agency, and some religious themes [though the latter is mostly aesthetic]. There are also some comedic moments, and some sad moments. There's a lot of moments.

Comms AU follows five versions (universes) of Hermitcraft as they are all just kind of subjected to The Horrors. It is formatted as a series of transcripts recorded from different characters' communicator devices (or comms) which I imagine as sort of like sci-fi wrist watches with touchscreens and buttons. Though each universe could have slightly different models!

Formatting

As I mentioned, the fic is set out like a series of audio transcripts (though I kind of bend the rules to be honest, it can be read as if it is being played back as a recording), so the writing style is more like a script or screenplay than a standard prose piece. Your average chapter may look like this:

GRIAN: I'm saying a line now. SCAR: I'm also saying a line. [square brackets and italics to indicate a non-dialogue sound] GRIAN: Dang what was that?!

I also play around with writing out the communicator's 'screen' prompts such as its logging out message, 'call incoming' functions, etc. These I try to keep consistent between chapters, but I'm pretty sure I lost that consistency in a couple of places. Oops.

You may be wondering how you know which universe a certain scene is taking place in. It's quite simple, really! Each scene starts with a line of text like this:

[COMM RECORD: P#003]

The letter indicates the character whose comm we are listening/reading through (i.e., the perspective) while the number indicates what universe we are in [or what universe that character comes from, anyway...]. So the above example would be Pearl from universe three!

Lore?!

Okay this isn't really 'lore' as that would be total spoilers, but I want to talk about what kind of themes and things come up a lot in the fic - especially in terms of who is 'what'. For example, I've written Xisuma as a voidwalker, a type of end-hybrid which breathes better in thinner oxygen environments.

Scar and Cub are generally vexes, though there are differences between universes that become important later. Grian (at least, the times we see him) is a Watcher, and EvoSMP is canon [to some universes] but I try to explain everything within the fic itself so there shouldn't be too much confusion if you don't know much about all that.

Themes-wise, the fic revolves a lot around conversations and relationships between the characters, obviously. Words are very important, while actions must be left mostly implied through the audio medium. Characters aren't always reliable, and neither is sound. The fic takes a bit of digging and theorising to truly enjoy, but I am slowly revealing more and more as I write, so things will mostly get cleared up!

Also this fic mostly takes place in season 9, and there are references to season 9. There's some reference to season 8 too!

Characters

This is the important bit! I can't write all the hermits, obviously, as that would be too much to manage, so instead lets focus on the names that come up the most often:

Grian, Scar, Cub, Pearl, Xisuma, and Mumbo are probably the most 'recurring' characters, though Etho, Bdubs, and Cleo show up quite a bit especially towards the start.

[I am a Grian girlie and this is obvious from... everything about this fic, but I wouldn't say it is entirely about him! He does show up in most chapters though haha]

Relationships get a little complicated, due to the multiverse stuff, but I will say that there is mumscarian endgame because I love them. The actual 'romantic' side of things aren't that important, though, and most of the other relationships can be read kind of ambiguously. Just check the tags for more info!

It's still gay as hell but the multiverse horrors are more important, to be honest.

Or are they... ?!

YOU'LL JUST HAVE TO READ TO FIND OUT!

[psst, I also did some art, you can find it in my #comms au tag on my blog]

[psst psst, if you ever wanna message me, send an ask, or even make art (!!!!!!) to support this fic PLEASE feel free to do so. I love every comment, every ask, and all the bits of creative work people have made. REBLOG, COMMENT, GO CRAZY, ILY!!!!!]

[lia-land]

Winter by Marissa Meyer

5/5

What a beautiful story. I have nothing bad to say about this book. This might actually be the first time.

This is the sixth book I’ve read this year that was over 800 pages, but this is the first one that didn’t feel like it. It was perfectly paced and the plot didn’t feel overly complicated at any point. With books this long, the characters or plot or both can sometimes feel tedious, but this was so good.

I thought I might find this series too childish, but I didn’t at all. It’s a great story that didn’t rely on shock value through random and underdeveloped plot twists, as many YA books tend to do these days. I really like how she introduced characters throughout this series. For example, we met Thorne in book 2, and then he ends up being the main love interest in book 3, similar to how we met Jacin in book 3 and he’s a main character in book 4. They were subtle introductions where we could form opinions on the characters prior to knowing that they were love interests. I would give this book 5 stars just for this alone.

I immediately noticed from Chapter 1 that we are getting more detailed descriptions of surroundings. I’ve found Meyer to be an author who mostly relies on dialogue, which I personally prefer, as some authors tend to overdo it with the descriptions (Sarah J Maas' interior design book aka Tower of Dawn). Meyer strikes a great balance of both in this book. I often find with YA series that quality of writing tends to decrease as the series goes on and publishers rush things, but this was the complete opposite. I enjoyed Winter as much as Cinder and Cress, and much more than Scarlet.

In YA, authors tend to simplify wars. Often, huge wars happen and they end in a matter of days. That is not entirely realistic (not that fantasy has to be realistic, but this specifically tends to be skipped over lazily). Of course, wars can and have ended in a matter of days in real life, but that’s very uncommon. Here, Meyer maintained that battle element, while also not turning into a full on war, so that she could end the actual battle in one night. This is also beneficial for us as readers because action scenes in YA are not always popular, especially when they’re only introduced in the final book of the series. The main fight in this book was contained to one night and it was on a smaller scale, so it remained more realistic while also not adding a bunch of action scenes. My expectations were low in this regard, so I was expecting for there to be a huge war between Luna and Earth contained into this one book, bur Meyer made the right decision in not doing that.

The ending was perfectly done. I would like to read more books about the characters lives following the events of Winter, but I don’t absolutely need it. (Update: I've since seen that Meyer has written non-canon short stories in this world. This is the best way to do it for this ending. Veronica Roth should take notes). The ending didn’t leave any obvious unanswered questions, in my opinion. It was a very well written story from start to finish. Even though I didn’t enjoy Scarlet, I can appreciate that it was a good story that tied into the rest of the series well and Scarlet as a character became very likeable in this final book.

The length of this book is interesting because it’s more than twice as long as the previous books in this series. I wonder if this was for contractual reasons or if she just wanted to keep the theme of naming each book after a different character, and didn’t want to ruin that by separating this story and making it a 5 book series or introducing a fifth fairytale.

My favorite aspect of this book and this series as a whole is how Meyer integrated all the stories, while still maintaining their importance as independent characters. Perhaps this applies slightly less to Wolf (and Scarlet until the second half of Winter). With this many main characters, it would have been easy for some of them to get lost in the background, but it was very well executed here.

Overall, this entire plot was so unique. This is a take on fairytale retellings that will be very hard to beat. I can’t understand why this series is not more popular than it is. It would also be such an amazing TV show, although expensive. I hope this story gets the recognition it deserves one day. I’m really going to miss these wonderful characters, even Wolf

[freeuselandonorris]

director's cut for just found me a brand new box of matches and how writing your second fic for the pairing felt versus the first, pleaaaaaase!

tysm this is a fun one to think about!

sooo after years of claiming that foot kink was one of the few kinks i did not fuck with (nothing against it, just never really did anything for me) i wrote a throwaway line in my first landoscar fic about lando chewing on oscar’s socked foot and thoroughly poisoned that particular well for myself. the image of it absolutely haunted me, and even though i wasn’t super familiar with lando’s personality back then in the way i am now, i definitely knew enough about him to be able to imagine him being a “foot pics pls” style replyguy and i found the image a) very funny and b) hot in a slightly gross/sleazy way (one of the best kinds of hot ofc).

i DO think i found this one slightly more difficult to write in terms of having a bit of stage fright about it. i posted my first landoscar fic — a prompt fill and one about them pissing all over each other — with very low expectations because piss fic usually gets very low engagement and i was used to the formula e fandom which consists mostly of me and my five friends all in different wigs at this point — and so the fact that people seemed to read it and like it and thought i’d caught their voices well slightly shocked me. i was also very up in my head about just how much younger than me they are, and whether it was going to be very obviously a millennial trying and failing to write gen Z dialogue.

having said that, i don’t thinkkk i did too bad a job with it? there’s a few things that annoy me now when i read it back (mostly really small and petty pointless things that probably nobody else notices like: i now know that lando is a PC gamer not a console gamer so he probably wouldn’t have been playing a PS5 while at home; yes i DO realise that my commitment to realism is borderline insane. but there’s also some of my favourite lines of landoscar dialogue i’ve ever written, like oscar telling lando the playlist is lo-fi beats for studying and doing weird sex stuff. i think maybe i was trying a bit toooo hard in places to replicate the snappy/funny dialogue that had come so naturally in the first fic, but yeah, overall i still really enjoyed writing it and i think it was pretty successful.

also i came out of it 100% into feet, so y’know, there’s that.