#(this is quoting a meme i don't even think he's ugly he's just not for me)

[baelavelaryon]

I'm so happy for you guys and your ugly fucking boyfriend I'm serious.

[treadmilltreats]

Praying for the answers

There are times in our lives when we feel lost when we are tired. When we have tried and tried and yet nothing is happening.

There are times when we have been knocked down so many times that we feel like giving up. So much so that we think it's not even worth it. Just forget about it. The dream is never going to happen. Just let it go.

I know these feelings because a few years ago, that was me. I've done all the right "things." I went to church twice a week, I tithe, I help people and try to be a blessing to others. I trusted God, I have faith, and I know he knows my heart, what I truly want to do.

So I did the only thing I know how to do when I get to this point is I pray. It seems like every year during the time of our International believers conference, I pray for a message, something I need to hear and trust, and believe, I always get it. That year was no different, and the message was just what I needed.

If you follow me, you know I am a single mom with 2 girls in college, you know I am a hustler and I work 3 jobs. I own a professional organizing and personal assistant business, I do hair on the side, and I take odd jobs like surveys and focus groups to pay the bills.

I've been praying why I am here. This is not my purpose or my passion. God... you know I want to write, I want to speak to tell others about what you did for me, to help others hold on, to move past their hurts like I have.

Why God? Why am I still here? This is what I've been asking. I was so discouraged, I know what I want to do and this isn't it.

Td Jakes' message at our conference was and I quote.

"God hears your cries. He knows this is not where you want to be. He hears you asking why am I still here? He feels your pain, and he knows that this isn't your purpose. "

Okay, I can't make this shit up even if I tried.

He goes on to say "I put you there for a reason, I will let you know when you are ready to move, you just have to hold on, to have faith, I know it's hard but just hold on, because it's coming. Don't give up. "

Well, I went into the ugly cry. This was God speaking through him to me for sure.

This is exactly what I was thinking, what I was praying about, and here he is speaking it all.

See, I believe in messages from God, like when you're praying and you turn on a song on the radio that says what you are feeling. When you find a book or scripture that validates your ideas. When you see a meme that is telling you what you need to hear, all of these are messages from God.

You must listen. You must trust the process.

I don't know why I am there, I am not sure about the lessons I am learning, maybe it's to humble myself, maybe it's to see people who lived lives and have wisdom to teach me. Maybe it's not ready. Maybe I'm not ready as much as I think I am. The reason is not clear yet, but I am grateful for what I have. I am happy I am working my own business and doing things my way. I know it will come just as I knew for the 4 last years while I was in that verbally abusive marriage that I would be where I am today. I knew it, I envisioned it. I believe even as I sat in the bathtub night after night crying that I wish I could be out of there. It was on his time, not mine, just like this time.

So today, my friends, I am here as a living testimony to tell you that if you pray for an answer, he will give it to you.

If you believe and never give up, you will get what you want and sometimes even more than what you asked for. You can't give up. Keep praying for the answers.

"Be the change you want to see,"

@TreadmillTreats

[ndostairlyrium]

speak-no-evil, megaphone, pencil for all of them?

O: these are super interesting!! Thank you so much!

🙈 SEE-NO-EVIL - whats a side of your oc that they don't want to show other people?

Elanor

That she can be so demanding when things just aren't served to her on a silver platter. Can be the smallest things like favors, or severe stuff like feelings. One tell that indicates she's restraining herself is her lips being so tight they form a straight line.

Hawke

He perceives himself as weak and pathetic, but he never shows publicly the sadness he feels because of it. He trained himself to just fake it to the point not even his family can tell he's upset.

Ankh

Her rage. More like raw frustration, which is something she needs to suppress or else she'd set fire to everything without a single remorse. It gets better after Corypheus is defeated but sometimes she just needs to take a deep breath and keep her hands busy.

📣 MEGAPHONE - how loud are they? what do they speak like? got a voice claim?

Y E S

I love this question! And I know italians in my followers list will have a good laugh at my choices 💛 or maybe they'd be just very concerned lol

Elanor

She has a decisive voice and you can tell she took lessons to refine it, I would say its tone is deep and a bit nasal but not too raspy. She's composed, most of the times, but when she gets loud she gets loud.

I do have the perfect voice claim for her but I can't find adequate vids or short clips << I'll elaborate on it another moment

Hawke

Oh he's loud and proud! He does have range of course, but when he has to draw the attention of someone on the other side of the street he just yells rather than walking there and tap their shoulder. Also he has a great singing voice o: I picture him as an effortless baritone.

His voice actor is just perfect so I won't go there, neither in eng nor in italian.

Ankh

Her

I like how the female inquisitor voice sounds in eng but like, how about the really annoyingly enthusiastical aspect of Lav's personality?? And what about the "I'm totally messing with you but there's a shade of melancholy behind it"? Where is it??

That's the perfect voice.

✏️ PENCIL - is there a particular quote / lyric that you associate with them?

uuuh I'm terrible at this and I know 80% of the time I will spend on this ask will be dedicated to this answer lol (I wasn't wrong)

Elanor: "It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes" Douglas Adams

Hawke: "If you're really a mean person you're going to come back as a fly and eat poop" Kurt Cobain

Ankh: "I tend to think that emotions are for ugly people" Willam

-

Emoji Ask Meme

[woodohwanedandproud]

@pashminabitch #seamayweed#Listen i saw your tag before abt seonho being sungrok's religion and i damn near lost my goddamn mind when i first read it bc you were#so! damn! Right about that!!😭#that tag stayed on my mind rent free ever since.i don't even rmember what the post was about lol#you know that meme abt staring at something for 5 hours straight?that was me last night when you posted this🥲💘.literally.#three...'he will use your name like a choke chain' aughhhh#five......much to think about😔🙏🏼#7. 'do not flinch.' 'do not doubt your thickened fingers.' 'you promised' and he never strayed from that promise- 💔#9.'when he explains how he cannot love you.that he will never be yours alone.' LIES. LIES HE LOVED YOU EOHACHU HE REALLY DID 😭💔💘#you were the only who stood by him.never abandoned him.you saw him in all his glory and his ugliness.#and in turn he was the only one in all of joseon who knows your true name(eohachu). So in that sense- he was yours and you were his alone.#10 'his own heart will empty him' i am on the floor.....</3#hwang sung rok#nam seon ho#mctna#seonrok#i absolutely love your choice of scenes (and description) for each line- esp the last two#that last one.it was the first time seonho actually turned back to look at sungrok wasnt it?.when before he would just look ahead and#expect sungrok to carry out his orders.but this time he looked back and i was so glad when he finally did#bc for once he got to see the look of genuine pride on the other's face..like yes right here is someone i trust.and he believes#he believes i did the right thing. He /believes in me/. And it was so important for seonho to realize that in that moment @seamayweed #i poured all my heart and seonrok feels into this set#and was wondering if i was able to get that across#turns out i succeeded#i'm so happy#haha glad i could make you lose your mind with that 'seon-ho is sung-rok's religion' tag#yes all of that!#sung-rok kept his promise#and never abandoned seon-ho#and saw him in all his ugliness and glory#and seon-ho did love him back!#even if sung-rok died without really knowing#😢#and i love that seon-ho was one of the few to know his true name#that they shared this intimacy with each other too#it makes me so giddy that you pointed out that 'his own heart will empty him' quote!#i always thought that one was perfect for seon-ho#and yess the last one!#it's the first time seon-ho really looks back at sung-rok and sees him#realizing he could only be there and win the jurchens over bc of sung-rok#'he /believes in me/'#every prophet/god needs a believer#and for seon-ho that believer was sung-rok @exo-s-victory-lap #THIS THIS THIS THIS IS WHAT I WANTED#sungrok has seen it ALLLLL he KNOWS sunho#like THIS is how i wanted them to hit this vibe this rooting for losing dogs nonsense @argents-huntress #this is absolutely incredible#a goddamn masterpiece of poignant underlying symbolism and tangible devotion#sung-rok ended up dedicating his life to seon-ho#even beyond his own goals#he was a weapon and seon-ho his wielder#but also vice versa#Seon-ho became more honed because of sung-rok who guided and supported him

― Jeanann Verlee, Lessons on Loving a Prophet (x)

(image description underneath the cut)

Keep reading

[blackcrystalball]

As a major hearstopper fan, I have to to say that the fandom is nasty. Like genuinely disgusting. Every single time I get onto twitter, I see that they've managed to find a new way to be assholes. Whether it's to the actors, each other, randos on the internet, they find a way.

In the span of about a year they: bullied Kit Connor off of twitter. Were freaking weirdos in how they expressed their attraction to him. Bullied Joe Locke about his looks (like they literally called a teenager ugly) in a near constant basis. They were so many kind of racist it was a bit hard to keep up. Were extremely transphobic, both implicitly and explicitly. Harassed Sebastian over a mistranslated interview after he apologized and explained what happened. Bullied Joe Locke off of twitter for siding with his friend. And finally, they forced Kit Connor to come out, this 18 year old had to out himself because people accused him of queerbaiting, (sidenote: people cannot queerbait, at least not for the reasons they are being accused of it. Not explicitly sharing what your sexuality is, is not queerbaiting. You don't owe private information like that to anyone. That shit is your business) the fandom were literally at-ing and quote tweeting Alice Oseman asking them to recast him because apparently he's straight, they felt entitled to his information and when they didn't get it, they decided he didn't deserve his platform and accused him of being false representation.

These people need to be fucking for real, like genuinely listen to themselves. They are angry because an 18 year old, a literal fresh out of the box teenager, didn't tell them if he's bi or not. They bullied someone who literally just took his first steps out of being a child for not behaving and expressing himself the way they wanted to.

The hearstopper fandom is gross, mean and awful. Even if it isn't the whole fandom, the assholes have become the face of it, and you can't separate yourself from them as easily as you'd want to because you will always be associated with them when people think if the fandom. No one is going to see the cutesy memes and the friendship bracelets that you've made for the actors because they're too busy watching the fandom burn a child inside out.

They're too busy watching a group of children get bullied by hundred and thousands of people.

There is no "toxic minority" and "good majority" when the loudest meanest people work hard to be the face of the fandom. When the worst of the fandom ensure that they get the most attention. You cannot truly think that anyone would view the hs fandom in anything other than a negative light when this is the kind of behaviour they exhibit.

And I am aware that I'm making sweeping generalisations, and that lumping all of you into this one category of complete assholes is unfair but I think that we saw tonight that most things are unfair. They way people treated Kit Connor was unfair, me making generalisations is unfair, but I don't care. I can't care, not when people are moving in droves to ruin a child's life. People being offended by my words won't even hold a candle what their words have done to the cast of hearstopper.

[well-its-not-human-anymore]

Hi Hi!!!! So I've been following your account for a little while now and I love every single comedy bomb you drop on what you write so I was wondering....

How would the boys react to their S/O who is usually reserved when at the lair, doing a full 180 when at April's? Like they could be April's roommate or something?....

Like crackhead energy, dishing out memes and vines and literally having a duel with Casey about leftovers in the fridge?... Yeah I know it's very specific 💀

I don't know.....the idea just popped into my head but I lack the creativity and comedy skills for that...so I was wondering if you could do something with this?.....

It's totally fine, if not 😁😁

This is... 100% me. I love this and I'm gonna pour my soul into it. Also I have started mentally referring to these as comedy bombs and I refuse to stop.

Also, I hope you don't mind that I wrote these in oneshot form instead of bullet points. It just made more sense for my brain.

TMNT Oneshots

The boys with a partner whose reserved at the lair but an absolute crack gremlin at home 🤣

Donatello

Donnie may have been a man of science, all logic and facts and numbers and things. But he absolutely believed that everyone had three separate faces, you were direct proof of that theory. While the purple terrapin had known you for nearly a year you’d only started dating a month ago and it shocked him that he was still uncovering new things about you. He loved it, sure, but it had a tendency to give him figurative whiplash.

He’d always known you to be calm and collected, maybe even a bit shy. He swore you’d explode if more than one person tried to talk to you at the same time. So it wasn’t an over exaggeration for him to say that your behavior at home nearly made him break his neck.

He was only there to help April fix a bug in her laptop and to confirm your next date, he was excited to see you since you’d had no contact in person for a week because of your schedules. Just lots of phone calls and exchanged text messages. You both missed each other like crazy and your roommate had neglected to inform you that your boyfriend was coming over.

Hers was already there and he was driving you up the wall, you’d never actually thought about committing a murder but Casey was pushing you very close to the edge of snapping. And he might as well have crane-kicked you off your cliff of patience and into the rushing river of “you little fucking shit I’m gonna piss on your grave” below. You hadn’t even heard Donnie come in through the window much less his conversation with April over her computer.

All you knew was that Casey had come parading into your room like a tyrant eating the leftovers in the fridge that you had specifically put your name on. That did it. Your eyes had skimmed over the top of your textbook to meet the asshole in front of you.

“Casey?”

He couldn’t speak through the mouthful he was trying to chew and grunted in pathetic response.

“Is that my cheeseburger?”

You’d never seen a living person imitate a pug’s facial structure so well, the man’s eyes bugged out of his head and he tossed the takeout box on your desk before turning and bolting out of your room. You followed about two steps behind with a bottle of shampoo in your hand. No, you weren’t entirely sure where you’d grabbed it from, all you knew was that it was your weapon. And it quickly became a very messy problem when it missed your target (Casey’s head) and slammed into the wall, exploding on impact.

You didn’t think you’d thrown it that hard.

“April April help help help helpppppppppppppp-'' The two on the couch had looked up during the chase throughout the apartment, Donnie was mostly curious at what Casey was screaming about. Not a lot usually made the guy make that noise. He was then distracted by April grabbing the laptop and passing it to him, she then clambered over his legs to sit behind him.

“YOU UGLY ASS CROISSANT! FUCKING PANINI HEAD- IT HAD MY NAME ON IT YOU DAFT AVACADO!”

Your boyfriend almost went vertical upon watching you tackle Casey to the floor and knee him in the groin. You shook the terrified man under you and slammed him a little harder into the rug.

“Touch my shit again and I’m gonna make the beaches of Normandy look like a goddamn family vacation.”

Then you climbed off of him and stood, brushing your disheveled t-shirt off with a huff. Donnie caught your attention and you raised your head to grin excitedly at him.

“Hi Dove! April didn’t tell me you were coming over,” you practically skipped over to the couch to peck him on the cheek, “I missed ya, are we still on for Saturday?”

He nodded in complete shock, his gaze flitting from you to Casey, who was still wheezing on the floor and clutching his dick.

“Uhhh yeah! Yeah, yep, Still good for Saturday. Uhm, completely unrelated question, where the hell did you learn to grapple like that?”

You shrugged absentmindedly, already walking to the hall closet to grab cleaning supplies for the puddle of shampoo in the walkway.

“Just kinda picked it up I guess? I’ve watched you guys train enough.”

Leonardo

See, Leo had always known that you were hiding something from him. Be it your true personality or some deep dark secret. He wasn’t really in a rush to find out, you’d tell him when you were ready. The leader enjoyed your quiet disposition anyways, you gave good advice and liked to meditate with him, what more could he ask for? What more could he want?

Well, maybe if you got along better with his family, although he supposed that wasn’t your fault, you always had been a bit shy. Even six months into your relationship with him, Leo only hoped that you’d warm up to his brothers eventually. You seemed to do alright with Splinter, that was a plus for the situation. It wasn’t that you were mean or impolite to the others, you were just… avoidant. Distant, quiet, whatever word you wanted to use. You just didn’t seem comfortable at the lair.

He was excited that April had asked to host a game night though, maybe you’d come out of your shell (haha, see what I did there?) and socialize, even for a little bit. They’d all shown up a few minutes early to make sure April didn’t need help with anything, she’d assured them that everything was handled and made sure to inform Leo that you would be back shortly with Casey from your snack run. Mikey had joked that you’d ditched the get together to avoid them but they all knew it ran the possibility of not being a joke.

You unlocked the door and held it open so Casey could get inside without tripping himself before entering yourself and kicking your shoes off. Leo looked up to meet your eyes and you sent him a wild grin, your entire face lit up with amusement.

“Hi babes! Are you ready to get your ass kicked at Monopoly?”

All the poor turtle could do was nod.

“Good. I did grab drinks by the way, April there should be a mixer in the cooler bag, Donnie there’s some of that lemon lime stuff that you said you wanted to try, Mikey, orange crush as usual, Raph I tried to go for Dr. Pepper but they were out so I figured that root beer was a safe second. And Leo they had a new boba flavor that you haven’t had yet so I grabbed one. If you don’t like it then you can have mine, I just have the peach royal.”

Beverages were tossed and they were lucky that their surprise didn’t throw off their catching skills. You and April shared a quick word in the kitchen as you took your coat off and ran a hand through your hair.

After some arguments team captains were decided and Donnie nearly had a heart attack when you picked him instead of Leo or either of your friends. He even went so far as to point at himself to make sure you weren’t joking. You declared that while you loved your boyfriend his morals were too strong to be competitive, Donnie’s were not, he said so himself.

They were all surprised that you’d remembered that conversation.

It wasn’t until halfway through the game that things started getting heated, you and Mikey were nearly jumping across the table at each other. And it visibly took all of your strength to not burst out laughing when he started yelling.

"YOU KNOW WHAT? THIS IS CHEATING! YOU'RE CHEATING! GET ON TOP OF THE FRIDGE!"

April and Casey were snorting into their arms as you got to your feet and walked towards the kitchen, making a poor attempt at climbing the appliance.

"THIS HOUSE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE!"

Raphael

Raph had always been under the impression that you were never really 100% yourself around him, he knew for a fact that you weren’t when you stayed over. He’d never seen someone so aggressively avoid someone, except himself of course. You were his partner of almost a year and it seemed like you were never going to let your true self shine. However you did seem to lighten up when you were alone with him, he supposed that was normal, but you may as well have been a pair of old earbuds that only work when you held them a certain way at the lair.

He honestly hadn’t expected that to change tonight, not given the text that Casey had sent him informing him of April’s recent breakup with whatever guy she’d been dating. So when he climbed in through the window and saw both you and Casey sitting on the floor in front of the bathroom he really didn’t think that the words out of your mouth would be-

“April you’ve got another twenty minutes of this then I’m ripping the door off the hinges!”

Casey shot you a look and you shrugged nonchalantly before getting to your feet and walking over to your confused boyfriend.

“Hey, sorry about this. Casey only texted you as a last resort if he needed someone to stop me from tearing the door off.”

Raph found that peculiar, “Uh, couldn’t he do it himself?”

The man in question looked up from his spot on the floor.

“Nah dude, they’re crazy. Last time I tried stopping them from doing something they nearly knocked my damn tooth out while screaming, and I quote, “If you put your hands on me I’m gonna fucking rip your face off” and quite frankly I don’t have the balls to test that.”

“No no dude, that’s valid. I wouldn’t either. Babe, why are you so-”

You raised an eyebrow at him over a glass of water, “Violent? I’m not Raph. These two just have little bitch feelings.”

He found it hard not to laugh at that and fifteen minutes later when you left his side to approach the door again it sent him reeling.

“This shit’s temporary April. You’ve got nice teeth and a fat ass, stuff your feelings down!”

Michelangelo

There would never be a time where Mikey wasn’t a prankster with you, it was just simply non-negotiable. You were cool with that and he was aware, he was also aware that no pranks were to be pulled at the lair. So he’d reign it in while you visited, just for a short while. But you’d never said anything about the apartment and Mikey was a creature of opportunity.

Unfortunately Leo talked him out of it and forced him not to pull anything while they visited. The leader was already on edge so when he walked in with the others following closely behind you were the first person to see him. Your eyes caught Mikey’s instantly and you might as well have been telepathic at that moment. But you took one look at Leo’s solid, angry face and seized your moment.

They weren’t at all ready for the scream.

“GET YOUR FUCKIN’ DOG BITCH!”

And they also weren’t ready for Mikey’s response of, “It don’t bite.”

And Leo was not ready for the pillow that got whipped at his face at incredibly high speed.

“YES IT DO-”

So when Leo finally realized that they were yelling at him his mood did not improve at all and in fact declined sharply into a pit of “oh fuck”. And that was how you ended up on Mikey’s shoulder getting dragged away from any sort of repercussion for your actions.

These got a little short near the end but I hope you like 'em and I hope I was able to capture what you had in mind! 😁

-Mars 🌠

[incorrect-irishlads]

PLEASE READ -

[TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of Suicide]

I know I'm an incorrect quote account, but I seriously need to say this. Apologies for if this doesn't make sense and it seems extremely cheesy... anyways:

I know these days are tougher than any day before but please, if you think you can't get through the day/night don't kill yourselves... suicide is never the answer. There's other ways to get through the next 24 hours. Whether it's by listening to your favourite music songs, going through your wardrobe and finding stuff you once used, drawing random little scribbles with a marker on your arm, etc. Killing yourself is never solution. If you think you can't get through this day, just think... "how did I get past the day before?" There's people all over the world you can talk to. Heck it doesn't even have to be a person! Talk to a stuffed teddy or your animal. Having my lil cat boi since January has helped me through tough times like this... wanna know what I tell him every time I feel awful? I thank him.

I thank my cat even IF he doesn't understand any word I'm saying.

Just know, that I believe you can get through what you're going through. You're never alone. If you need a place to vent about ANYTHING, just know that I, Kest who owns this silly lil account, is here for you my friend. So are others, anyone who you can think of. You can vent anywhere on this account if you need. In messages, the comments, put it in the hashtags if that makes you comfortable! Or heck it, if you don't wanna vent for whatever reason, let's talk about YOUR interests! You like football even though I understand nothing of it? Frick it! Tell me about your favourite team and how it's played! Send memes, let's have a gif war of who can find the best gifs!

Getting carried away there, sorry... here's another reminder: Better days are coming. You just gotta push through the bad to experience the good. Quoting Anthony Ramos' song: cry today, smile tomorrow. Let your negativity out. Just... don't kill yourself please. You're all amazing, wonderful and great. You may not think so but others do. People may not say it or they may not seem to look like they think you're great, but they do. You're talented, fantastic and unique in your own fabulous way. Keep being you. The best person to be is your true self...

One of the reasons why I went on a rant like this, is because someone sadly jumped in front of the train I'm on and sadly committed, I wish for them to be alive even though I don't know who they are. If they didn't make it... I hope the afterlife is treating them positively.

I'm sorry once again if this sounded cheesy, I love you all, even if I don't know who you are. Please, keep being your true self and don't let the demons take over your mind, whatever they're telling you is wrong. You're not ugly, you're not worthless, you're not useless. You're a great person who deserves to experience good things in life. You deserve to complete your goals, you deserve to walk this earth. You're here for a reason, and that's to experience things and to make the world be what it needs for the future generations. I'm going to stop ranting or we'll be here all night. Again, you're all amazing and I love you all. Take care. 🤍🖤🤎

[lingeringscars]

she didn't know if she would pick up. that was the main takeaway. slowly, she had started to reintegrate herself among the living. she answered the clues or puzzles or code he left for her to, she made her way back to a computer and the challenge of figuring out what someone lightyears beyond her in smarts left for her to decode. she wasn't ready for a conversation, but she knew if he was calling, it was serious. it's something birkhoff has always been good at, despite her claims for the opposite. giving her space when she asked came without hesitation, without reproach, without question. she asked, he did, and she was left wondering how she had been so wrong about him.

she should have just asked for damn space; instead, she convinced herself the only way he'd leave her alone was if she made him. no, worse, she convinced herself he was already leaving and would never speak to her again, so she better give him a reason for that. and she did. she gave him so many reasons, but he still showed up for her. through stupid memes, stupid cartoons, and dumbass comments hidden in code, but he was there. somehow he still managed to be a constant presence.

okay, not somehow. lightyears. she's had star wars playing on repeat since she arrived, and even though she's basically been in and out of sleep ever since, she's pretty sure she could quote a decent amount of it. she's lucky she remembered to turn it off before they arrived (the fifth was playing, she thinks, which is actually the second you're supposed to watch, which is fucking stupid and confusing for no reason. numbers are hard enough without that, but who is she to question birkhoff's knowledge). it made her feel closer to him, despite being the reason he was gone.

she may have remembered to turn the movie off, but she didn't remember how to turn herself off. she hovered near him, willing herself to speak, to apologize. she owed so much she didn't even know where to begin. she could start with i didn't mean it, only some of it she had. she could start with i don't know what's wrong with me, but she spent a month trying to figure out just that. she should start with you should never forgive me, but she can't bring herself to say those words either. she can only ask if he's okay because he told her they had to stay here because division found them. alex had the idea to blow up the safe house, and jesus christ she should be checking with her first, but she can't. there's somehow more there than what needs to be dealt with with birkhoff, and she's not ready for that conversation yet. she's not ready for the one with birkhoff either, but she owes him it. she...she needs him. it's selfish and ugly, but she's shown just how much of her is both of those things already. she needs him, and she needs them to be okay. she needs to fix things with him because she might drown if she doesn't.

"you." it answers the question what she wants. of course, that's not how she's using it though. "until you figure out something." no, she's not ready to be thrown back into this at all, but she focuses on this because it's easier. birkhoff is the one who sets up the safe houses. nikita and michael might have pretty words about it, but birkhoff is the one doing the labor, setting up the perimeters, making sure they're safe. he deserves that credit. "it's fine. you guys need a place to stay. this is available. the computer's all yours." she rubs her arm at the sudden chill that worms through her at that. "you'll hate the setup, but whatever, you can change it." she holds herself now to stop herself from reaching out to him, to stop herself from saying spit it out already. she knows why he's hesitant to speak to her, to be around her. it's all her fault. "i'll probably just...be in the room anyway." it's never felt like her room.

"what are you talking about?" she doesn't understand why he would want anything to do with her, truly, but she's still entirely convinced he's the one leaving. "you're the one itching to get away." and who could blame him, after all?

@lingeringscars sent: 69 for harper and birkhoff for the spotify wrapped meme.

he hasn't wanted to say it. think it. and oh-so-lucky for him, he's had no shortage of distractions - percy and amanda are good for that, if nothing else. he's had his hands full trying to help their little group come back from blowing up the beach house and effectively roasting their whole set up and play the never-ending game of take down percy, up pops amanda, and it should be enough to make sure all he has time to think about is the task directly in front of him. but he never stops thinking about harper, no matter the very present, very pressing dire circumstances.

it’s like a program that’s always running in the background. he finds comfort in occasionally catching her eye, feeling her warmth beside him. he wants to be a good, reasonable kind of person who would simply be grateful to be near her rather than the selfish, greedy person who just thinks about it all being gone. but he’s not. “i know you’re leaving,” he finds himself saying abruptly, anxiously rubbing his hands against his pants and looking at the ground. “or- or i guess.. we’d be leaving. gettin.. gettin’ outta’ your hair. give you your space back. once we.. we figure out a new place. i know.. getting thrown back into this isn’t what you wanted, and i don’t want that for you. i… i want you.. you to have everything you want.” he closes his eyes. “all of it, happy, but…”

but losing her was the worst thing he’s ever experienced, and he doesn’t want to do it again. he can’t do it again. “i just.. i just wanna know that.. it.. it doesn’t have to be.. radio silence. cause i… i really.. i really don’t want to lose you again.”

[everythingsinred]

Okay with the character bingo, I must inquire about your fandoms bc I don't want to be like "ahh what do you think of this fine lad"

And you being like :/ idk who that is nice bird tho

Like that would be kinda funny, but also it would be neat to hear about your other fandoms than GA. Like I've seen Go Piss Girl (Gossip Girl, but the only thing I know about that show is that meme 😅), The Office, something to do with spies? And one with characters that have big ol eyes but idk what it is.

In any case, for the time being, what your thoughts about ✨Mikan✨? My impression of her has changed a lot over the years, I first thought she was annoying but now I'm just kinda sad for her :,)

hi!!

yeah i dont watch owl house but im pretty sure thats hunter? if its not im sorry i only know what i see on my dash in passing lol. nice bird tho (hehe)

yeah i like gossip girl! i was at the height of that when i was 13 but its a nostalgic show for me. its not a show that i think too much abt ig. mostly i just quote it all the time w my sister. i have a gossip girl character as my icon now bc i like having matching icons w my sister! we like to switch through fictional friendships/sibling dynamics. 

i also LOVE the office and also all sitcoms of that nature (i love parks and rec, superstore, new girl, etc. i love funny shows that focus on sentimental relationships that end up making me ugly cry. i think the office might be my fav but tbh i thought that abt superstore AND new girl before so idk if i even have a fav).

spy x family is a new anime im into these days! its found family and very cute!

and show w big eyes... im not sure which one u mean hhh. i like a lot of anime, my favs being ga (ofc), jibaku shounen hanako-kun, and fruits basket. im also really into the webtoon hooky, which is abt witches.

anyway mikan time:

ONE OF MY FAV CHARACTERS OF ALL TIME. i talk abt natsume all the time so it might feel like hes my all time fav, but he and mikan actually share that place in my heart. 

yes similarly i also felt she was annoying when i first watched the anime (i was twelve when i first got into it). at such a young age i had a tendency to get irritated with the female mcs in media (internalized misogyny, etc) and mikan was 1. loud 2. bold 3. stupid, which are naturally unforgivable traits for a character to have (sarcasm). when i rewatched/reread at 14 i realized that i was looking at her all wrong. around the time i started observing the ga tumblr fandom around age 15 (i only recently started being active in the ga fandom bc i was too nervous before), there was a pervasive idea that mikan was a mary sue.

UGH so let me go off real quick. i will talk way more abt mikan in my next nm essay, but ill summarize some of my ideas briefly for this. mikan’s arc is all about feeling useful, having agency, and how best to help others. she is maybe one of the few characters who undergoes OVERWHELMINGLY negative character development. i dont mean she was flanderized or ruined, i mean that this little girl started developing the idea that she should smile all the time and hide all her negative feelings in order to make OTHERS feel better. this is not good! but its treated like its good, like thats the best choice she can make (this is the actual reason that i only ship her romantically w natsume actually, but ill go into that in my essay). it can be fun for a character to devolve, to make the wrong choice, but this change wasnt treated that way.

another issue is i genuinely HATE mikan having the stealing alice. she should never have had the stealing alice. do i realize thats more than half the manga im talking about? YES. it completely upended her character arc. her nullification alice was so understated! she felt like it was useless and was SO insecure about it. then all of a sudden she has the stealing alice, which can be dangerous, but definitely cannot be called “useless” and her story about uselessness/having a “boring” alice just. falls short. yukas story w the stealing alice was so meaningful and impactful on its own. mikan ALMOST being the next yuka couldve been compelling if it didnt ruin the set-up that the entire first half of the manga was focusing on. 

anyway mikan is NOT a mary sue for the above reasons. she is not effortlessly perfect. many people in the manga call her plain. she can be really stupid. she doesnt always save the day. in fact, other people often have to save her, making her feel useless (which is why she shouldve saved natsume. they were each other’s key to resolving arcs and yet. and YET.) she can be loud, brash, bold, and often says the wrong things. she has a really apparent character arc and calling her a mary sue ignores all that. ppl who think mikan is a mary sue are my worst enemy and i will fist fight them.

now ill talk a little about mikan in fanfics bc i think its worth mentioning, especially since i filled out that square abt her being done dirty. like i said, mikan is stupid. im not insulting her. some people are stupid. shes not good at academics. shes a lot more sporty than she is brainy. she rushes to conclusions and doesnt always think things through. shes not really a rational person all the time. fanfics often treat this stupidity as a negative trait to be fixed. maybe shes stupid when shes little but she’ll be a genius when she gets older! look how smart she is now! instead of just letting her be dumb. she has other traits, like deep empathy, athleticism, passion, optimism, that are often sacrificed in fanfic in order to make room for her made up intelligence. 

mikan in fanfic (especially if shes supposed to be older) is often painted as more subdued than her loud manga counterpart, more often cynical, introverted, skeptical, etc., and ALWAYS pretty even if SHE doesnt see it (despite being described often as plain in the manga). i have some theories about this. 

1: western fans are more comfortable making mikan like a western mc than one more typical of anime. if u think abt what a typical western female lead looks like, she’s usually less feminine, “not like other girls,” a smart bookworm who is cynical and rational. this is familiar so i think a lot of western fanfic writers end up leaning mikan this way even at the cost of making her unrecognizable. so mikan being stupid and loud and optimistic are all traits to be fixed, bc theyre not as familiar in a lead role. 

2. fans want to have a mature mikan, and they think theres no way she can keep her childish traits, like stupidity, boldness, impulsiveness, and idealism, and NOT be a child. i find that ridiculous. why cant mikan be a giddy, happy, upbeat adult? why does she have to lose all the traits that make her mikan in order to demonstrate maturity? 

3. i might be off base with all of these, but this one... i feel the most strongly about. mikan is the main character. in a lot of stories, the reader is invited to relate to the main character, to project onto her. often, the main character is vague or universal BC imagining her as you is the whole point. fanfic (especially the older fanfic) turns mikan into that easily recognizable and relatable mc we can insert ourselves into. 

anyway i have a lot more thoughts on mikan, way more than i could ever say in one post (which is why im doing an essay series) but these are some basic thoughts i have. im sorry its so long. 

[munsontm]

💞 — compliment my steve or im filing for tumblr divorce

send me a 💞  and i’ll tell you something I like about your portrayal !!  - ACCEPTING / @harringtontm

first of all, you can't divorce me. i deleted the marriage license post. >:)

secondly, forgive me for snagging this discord message between us. but it stuck out to me: steve loves all sides of eddie & he loves that eddie has many sides eddie is complex eddie is a d20 & steve wants to roll & roll & roll until he knows every single one.

i love how your steeb silently notices and internalises all that he sees about eddie, and being able to correlate that to a D20 is sexy. but also how even when Steve sees the worse parts of Eddie. he still loves and cares about him. that's what has been the most important part for me with your steve, is how hard he loves, and how detailed his love is. he loves in the nuances of people, and he doesn't just look at the surface of them. it takes an extremely good writer to dig into those nuances of romance and love. i have dubbed your steve the romantic steve because of it. your talent lies in highlighting his softer side, which you've said to me before. and it's not even just his romantic side, either. he romanticises his platonic relationships beautifully too, especially about robin and the kids. the discussions we've had about Robin, Eddie and Steve as a trio literally makes me wanna cry. Because it's the bond all three of them need and deserve. I'm going off topic now.

further details from a thread i was about to reply to, and then got inspiration for this meme from it:  it’s a little messed up that it took monsters  &  alternate dimensions to get him to see who eddie is for real, but now that he has, it’s like steve can’t look away.

and even though he's a soft boy at heart. he's not afraid to admit his ugly faults from the past. and i know your main theme is the pain of growth for steve, and it's shown so stunningly in the quote above. it literally took monsters and near death for steve to realise eddie was just a guy not too different from himself. it's quite a painful realisation because he wasn't too kind about eddie before, and he's grown once again for realising the truth of it. that he shouldn't judge a book by its cover. ugh, and just steve continuing to grow into a better person, and shedding that guy he used to be, STILL IS sometimes. we love to see it. you just do that so well. it makes me wanna cry, babes. like i know tumblr rpers say a lot about their mutuals "you could write it better than the show writers" and in this case, i really think it's true. i will forever urge you to explore the parts of steve you think you aren't as good at, though. because you already the parts your good at stunnalina style.

we have yet to explore a potential thing between eddie and steve in earlier seasons....and I'm kinda gagging for it now. give me bitch tits steve, and he can see why people don't mess with the freak physically. >:)

@harringtontm

[rpmemesbyarat]

DISNEY'S "GARGOYLES" SEASON 2 QUOTES RP MEME

Why do you read that stuff?

I like a man who brings me weapons.

Nice wake up call.

We won't have to find them. They'll find us.

Revenge, as they say, is a sucker's game.

I'll settle for tearing this jerk IN HALF!

Want to see me use both hands?

That's no way to treat a lady!

That was no lady.

Thanks for saving my bacon before it got fried.

Look, just promise you'll call if there's trouble.

Go ahead, try something!

I'd love to do that again!

That wasn't a tranquilizer dart.

It was loaded with a mutagenic formula!

You don't know anything about her!

Why are you stomping on my friend here?

I was particularly proud of my death scene.

You never let me drive.

The important thing is, you're alive.

Are you sure this is a good idea?

Something's not right here.

Then you leave us no choice!

How are we supposed to find them?

Please, I beg you, be quiet.

This isn't a good idea.

I'm best qualified to go.

My memories are clouded.

Why should I trust you?

If you can't trust me, then trust your heart.

Why do you fight me, my love?

We are destined to be together for all eternity.

I will choose who I love!

Now we'll see what this creature looks like up close.

Why stare at marks on a page when you can rent the video?

Well, I can't read and I don't think I'm missing anything.

Harrier jets! They can take off and land like helicopters. When your life's this exciting, who needs books?

Are you all right?

I had a little trouble.

This beach isn't safe after dark.

Do you need a doctor?

Come on in. I've got a fire going.

There's little I can offer in return, except my thanks.

You understand, I don't get any real pleasure from this. Well you've got courage, beastie. I'll give you that.

Funny, something about your voice made me think you were a soldier, once.

You were there.

I'm old, but I'm not that old.

I'm glad you came back.

I'm afraid I can't stay, but I think I left something on the terrace this morning.

Have you come across a large canister?

The name sounded phony.

I do know him, but he's not a friend!

A magic book?

They're worthless. No magic at all.

The written word is all that stands between memory and oblivion.

Without books as our anchors, we are cast adrift, neither teaching nor learning.

Books are lighthouses erected in the dark sea of time.

Is this how you welcome all your guests?

They have a sense of humor. You have none.

Yeah, I know, you're as relieved I am that everything's back to normal.

Wouldn't it be great to be a shapeshifter?

Well, let's just get this over with, shall we?

How can I be of service, hmm?

Out with it. I haven't got all night.

I'm sure you'll fit right in.

What is it you really want?

This just might be fun after all.

I thought everyone knew this.

Shapeshifters, elves, fairies, you mean they're real?

You mean, you thought I was ugly?

I want you to get rid of the humans. ALL of them.

Does this look like Aladdin's lamp? I have limits, after all.

Humans love a battle hearty.

I'll never get the hang of jumping off rooftops.

I'll always be there to catch you.

Do it, and you win your freedom.

It will be my pleasure. But afterwards, I'm going to need a very long nap.

There. You're free.

The sun, it's glorious! I never thought that it could feel so good.

I'm sorry about the bomb. But it proves how dangerous this case is.

When someone messes with your partner, you're supposed to do something about it.

You still haven't learned that crime doesn't pay.

A trade?

Let's just say, I don't trust you with it.

So, now you know my weakness.

Only you would regard love as a weakness.

A momentary lapse, I assure you.

Halloween! Tonight is the night!

Come on. I've wanted to stroll down a city street with you for a long time.

Marry me.

Are you serious?

We're genetically compatible, highly intelligent, and have the same goals.

You could've been hurt. I should've been with you.

Oh-well, spilt milk. Let's move on to plan B.

Don't listen to him. It's a trick! He couldn't tell the truth if his life depended on it!

Even if what you say is true, why should I help her?

Because you know what it means to lose some you love.

Not a good night for you.

You can't believe anything he says.

If someone like him can love, perhaps there is some hope for this world.

Take this as token of my love.

Upon this I pledge my heart to you forever.

Why do you need all this?

I wanted it, so I took it.

It's so unlike you to attack first.

I simply invited you here to talk.

Our past encounters have not inspired me to trust you.

It's crazy to even consider going!

I'm not interested in reminiscing!

Have you no respect for anything?

Believe me, I know exactly how you feel.

I will never be like you!

I do not wish to hurt you.

I do not wish to be you!

What am I to do?

Do nothing.

Do not worry.

Live in the moment.

Attend the petty angers and jealousies that fill your heart.

Fortify yourself with love and trust.

Fulfill the vows of love you make, for they can surely save you.

Time travel's funny that way.

Get away from me, you sentimental fool.

It's a pretty good likeness.

You know more than you're letting on.

T'was your handiwork.

very life is precious.

Take care not to become what you fight against.

Vengeance begets only a further cycle of more vengeance.

Do you want vengeance or a solution?

This is bigger than either of us has ever faced.

We'll have to work together to stop her.

Truce?

You are the cause of all this.

Humans will learn to respect you.

I would rather they fear me.

What are you doing to help?

That's one way to settle an argument.

I thought I'd rid myself of you long ago

You've forgotten about me.

You're too late. You can't save them. No one can!

I'm not here for them. I'm here for you.

I want it over between us!

I wear this as a reminder of your treachery.

Let's not start that again. You blame me, I blame you. Aren't you tired of talking about it?

I'm not here to talk.

Killing me will gain you nothing but your own death.

Death is never the answer. Life is.

I'm just so tired

Your thirst for vengeance has only created more sorrow.

I offer you one last opportunity for forgiveness and mercy.

I merely offer a sample of what you planned for me.

You have learned nothing.

I will still have my revenge!

What do we do with them?

You come in handy now and then.

I'm quite glad the plan worked.

I'm no hero, I just do my job, and my job for tonight is over.

All I want to do is hit the sack.

Why would you want to hit a sack?

How long was I out?

Even shadows must be true to their shade.

We don't need to wait for sunset.

Is it supposed to hurt that much?

Just get on with it.

Recognize the woman?

She seemed familiar, but I just couldn't place her.

You're getting real good at bypassing alarms

Don't give me credit.

It was too easy!

Maybe misery loves company.

If you're human, then you're subject to human laws.

Either way I win!

I fear no human!

There are forces at war within me.

I will return some day, if I can.

You sound like every human employee I ever fired!

Crush all of them together and you couldn't squeeze one iota of personal integrity from the lot!

No excuses, creature!

Learn to take responsibility for your own actions! And STOP whining!

Oh, I am trembling in my chair.

You believe I am not responsible. Yet I remain your prisoner?

Who said you're not responsible?

It doesn't matter that you were tricked, you know now that your actions inflicted grievous damage. Do you take responsibility for them or not?

Well, what are you going to do?

You seem distracted, having second thoughts?

We'll celebrate over breakfast.

No more excuses. I accept full responsibility for my actions. I was wrong.

Integrity is never easy. It's a daily struggle, a costly struggle.

I know I owe you a great debt for the mistake I made a year ago.

If the text wasn't new to me, it was at least worth revisiting.

All I know is I'm about to be wiped out!

It doesn't have to be that way.

I can break these chains. But only you can get me past the bars.

Automatons know nothing of betrayal or honor. They know only what they're programmed to know.

Only living beings possess the ability to change, and make new choices.

You've given me much to consider.

We are friends.

I'd rather not have your death on my conscience

You'll never reach the bridge!

You have two minutes until impact, one minute before I detonate.

I don't want any innocents hurt!

If it goes down, I'm going down with it.

I knew you wouldn't let me down.

Yes, well, you have that effect on people.

I built this company for you!

I'd probably give it to you, if you'd just stand up and ask me for it honestly!

Asking for it wouldn't be any fun at all.

'Fun' is still more important to you than honor. I can't understand that.

Well, maybe you'll have better luck relating to the next generation.

You should've heard him laugh.

Made my hair stand on end, if I had any.

Surely you know I am not in the habit of playing childish pranks or laughing maniacally in the dark.

Do you even know how to laugh maniacally?

Don't tempt me.

Typical. You do and do and do for them, and what happens? They twist the knife in you!

I think I've created a monster.

Have you ever considered the bounties of genetic engineering?

Or maybe cybernetics is more your style?

Save the horror show for Halloween.

I'm sure tired of taking punishment, and I'd love to be able to give some back

That's the source of the trouble.

I hope you not planning to eat your catch.

Now that I'm in charge, I'm not taking any more of your cracks!

You're barely our species!

I'm in charge, here!

I find him very attractive.

Well, that's sicker than usual.

I'm a partner in a freak show!

I should'a figured it was crazy to stick with this crew

And if you play it smart, there'll be plenty of lettuce for everyone!

I should get my own cable TV show.

Oh, me and my big mouth.

It is the cure! It has to be!

Of course it's the cure! You must trust me!

It was you all along! I trusted you!

You turned me into a monster and I defended you!

I'm sorry it had to turn out this way.

You always overplay your hand

Tell me something' Why me?

You're old, and getting older.

I thought you might even appreciate the opportunity.

Growing old terrifies you, doesn't it?

Nothing terrifies me, because nothing is beyond my ability to change.

True immortality isn't about living forever, man; it's about what you do with the time you have.

When all your scheming's done, what will be your legacy

You're still alive! It's a miracle!

Boy, the city sure is different when it snows.

Not a bad life, all things considered.

There is a cure. There must be!

You can't keep me in here forever!

I'll get out! Do you hear? I'll get out!

About time you came back.

Why did you kidnap me? What do you want of me?

See, it wasn't as hard as you made it sound.

Ah, you wish to be immortal.

If the procedure is successful, I'll release you.

This is just a sculpture's model. The real thing is life sized, and lifelike.

What's in this for you?

Service is its own reward.

I wouldn't even know where to start looking.

You may as well be of some use to me.

Open this cage, and I'll show you how 'useless' I am.

It's hard to top that.

What you seek demands a heavy price.

Death and old age have their price as well. And it's too expensive for me.

Without your sword, you're helpless.

Swordless? Maybe. Helpless? NEVER!

What you choose to do with your life is your own affair, as long as it's got nothing to do with me.

You're just full of surprises.

No, let him go. He's earned it.

I wish it hadn't turned out this way.

I was so close to finding out if the legend was true. Now there's no one to test it on.

Throw down your weapon!

Is this a whole city of fools and lawless ruffians?

I'm the law here, pal!

You are a guardian, like myself.

I will submit to your law.

You are learning.

It will take some time.

Prepare to do battle!

I have no fight with you.

What is this, merit badge test night?

Oh well, better make sure it's an uneven fight.

The weak are to be protected, not exploited.

Aaah, who died and made you king?

If you don't know anything, why were you shooting at us?

Do I really need an excuse to have a good time in my own home?

They say a man's home is his castle, and what fun would a castle be without a dungeon?

If it gets any more saccharine in there, I'm going to put a finger down my throat.

I'd sure like to know how you got here, but I'm programmed to shoot first and ask questions later.

I demand a favor.

Death is always pointless. That is the point.

I demand reparation! My son was cruelly and unfairly taken from me!

Death is the ultimate fairness. Rich and poor, young and old - all are equal in death.

Our planet cannot support so many lives at once.

I apologize for any trouble I caused in my efforts to reclaim it.

It seems I'm out of practice dealing directly with mortals.

It seems I am unaccustomed to dealing with a god

We have all gained rare enlightenment this night

Mmmm, what a peculiar sight.

Now, that's odd.

Do you often go wandering about at night, young lady?

My dear, are you saying you don't remember your own name?

I can't seem to remember anything. I feel lucky I know how to talk.

How did I end up in the middle of the Pacific?

I guess I could use a ride

I thought you looked familiar. We've met before.

Do you know what a scroll is?

Get your claws off me!

You might want to reconsider your request.

We're gonna die!

I will not let anything harm you.

You win. I'll behave.

I cannot believe you pulled the trigger on me.

Just shut up and land.

I just don't remember! I'm not even sure I want to remember!

I understand your words, I simply do not believe them.

You have been long expected.

This trough is filled with acid. In about ten minutes its going to do a very nasty job on that soil carving, not to mention your rugged good looks.

It's my first real stab at clichéd villainy. How am I doing?

How are you doing this? No machine can hold me!

I should sue you for trademark infringement.

I've always considered myself a trickster at heart.

History cannot be changed.

You will not win!

What are you going to do? Bite my kneecaps off?

I know from experience the transforming power of a child's love.

The future is not written yet.

I have a sunny disposition and I'm always kind to animals

I've always respected you as a fellow inmate

He's a fool, but he may be useful.

I can work with that!

Now, now! That's your friends' genetic make-up you're insulting.

You are master now?

I should've known. But why this subterfuge?

Hey, I live for subterfuge!

I do not want escape, I want vengeance!

There's no such thing as "a little" vengeance.

No catches. No tricks. No strings.

So, things have come full circle.

You know how I feel about you, right?

[fuwushiguro]

You probably don't care but in an effort to get to know each other better I decided to answer the questions I sent you as well!

Also maybe this would help as a lil distraction from being overwhelmed? Just two besties getting to know each other!

Do you have any scars?

I actually have a ton of acne scars and growing up and seeing a majority of my classmates have flawless skin made me really insecure, I still kinda am, but I've learned to love that part of myself just a little bit! I never felt comfortable with my sonas/self inserts having acne scars as all the dots make me feel kinda ugly so to remedy that I represent my scars as stars! It just makes me feel prettier

How did you get your name?

I've asked my mom this a million times but how I got my irl name is my mom was flipping through a baby book and had no clue what to name me and I believe the nurse suggested the name or my mom saw it, slapped an e at the end, and called it a day. Fun fact! Me and my siblings all have six (6) letters in our name and we all have one (1) y!

Do you talk to yourself?

Oh abso-fucking-lutely. Talking to yourself is just thinking out loud like I always say. I could be thinking about my f/o's and tell myself to shut up out of nowhere when I get flustered, blurt random shit my ocs would say, complain to myself about my coworker asking me to cover for them, quote a random meme. It could be anything. The sky's the limit.

Favorite song?

I honestly couldn't pick one either but some I've been listening to back to back are Woman by Doja Cat, Massa or Rise by Tyler the creator, and Rene by The Free Nationals. And honestly same, when I'm too lazy to change the song or find a new song and fall in love with the beat I'll just listen to it on repeat for like 2 hours it isn't even funny😗

Hope you don't mind my rambling! Oh and I'm 19 and my pronouns are she/her! It's nice to meet you!

Omg sorry this is so long!!! -🐝🌼

Omg no please feel free to talk to me about whatever you want whenever u want my inbox is always open to random chatter or venting or whatever u guys need! As long as ur nice to me I’m always around to talk 😌

Firstly!!! I feel u about the acne stuff! I think my skin has gotten a lot better since I found a routine that works for me but honestly I still feel pretty insecure about my skin sometimes ! I’ve had acne trouble since I was like NINE so it’s very understandable that you have felt that way about yourself! But it’s so sweet you’ve found a way to make yourself feel better, ur so beautiful nonnie!!! Such a sweet kind soul 🥺

I hearing people’s baby name stories 😂 it’s always so wild to me when people don’t know what to name their children like you’ve had months to prepare for this hahahaha! But that sounds cute 🤩 and what a coincidence with ur siblings too!!

YES all of that is so relatable I do the same! I love talking to myself omgggggg I talk to myself in accents sometimes too 🥴

All GREAT songs I had a woman phase the other day too!! But I LOVE that you like Tyler, he’s my favourite artist!! I love him a lot and it’s been dope to see his growth over the years 💘

Do u have a nickname u would like to be called? Or would u prefer me just call u by ur emojis? Let me know cutie!!

Thank you for all of this hehe 💕💖

[caffeinatedtimdrake]

Hi! I don't know if you're still taking requests (congrats on 200+ by the way!!! You deserve us all you gem :D) but if you are, can I request 47 ("I'm fine." "You don't look fine." "Then stop looking.") with Timmy? Thank you if you can do it, and don't worry about it of you can't!!! Again, congrats on the milestone :D 💙💙💙

hello!! you are the real gem here. I hope this is okay! about 1.5k of Tim x Reader fluff.

also requested by the wonderful @prettylittlebrownskingyal

47.“I’m fine.” “You don’t look fine.” “Then stop looking.”

The bitter taste of failure lingers on your tongue, tugging the corners of your mouth downward into grimace. 

Tim regarded you through ocean eyes, peaking over the top of his computer manual cautiously. 

“I don’t want to talk about it.” You grumble, low voice reverberating off the walls of the study room, applying perhaps too much pressure to your pencil because the tip snaps off. 

You don’t even flinch. 

“Okay, okay. If you say so.” He chirps, glancing back down to the jumble of letters and symbols. 

Barely ten seconds pass before his gaze flits back up to study you. There’s a storm in your eyes and a crinkle in between your eyebrows and he can’t help the ache in his chest at the sight of you so troubled. 

A lump forms in your throat because you can feel the concern swimming in Tim’s gaze and it brings warmth to your cheeks. You know him too well to conceal your distress – and he’s too privy to Bruce’s intel, anyway. 

Last night had been a disaster, heavy emphasis on dis. You were supposed to be in and out of the lab in less than an hour with a USB full of information on a new genetic research program without a hassle. 

That’s not quite how things played out.

It thrilled you to no end that Barbara was allowing you to operate a mission solo. This was your chance to prove your worth; that Babs hadn’t made a mistake training you, that you were just as capable as the boys, that you could handle the pressures of heroic vigilantism.  

Several unexpected firewalls, a newly upgraded security system, and one untied boot left you panicked and cornered by a dozen security guards in a hallway colored a dizzyingly bright, institutional white, gripping a bat-shaped USB so tightly your knuckles ached beneath sleek leather gloves. Nightwing had to drop in and save you; you, someone who was supposed to be a hero – you were supposed to do the saving, not be saved. 

Once you reached the exit, helping an injured Nightwing along, you heard Babs in your ear, a frantic static buzz, reassuring you that it was okay things didn’t go according to plan, that you still succeeded in downloading the information, that your safety was the most critical. 

When you got back to the Batcave, tugging off your shoes and ripping off your mask, your face burned with disappointment. The embarrassment smothered you, shame tightly gripping your spine, infamy radiating from your nerves.Babs watched you with concern, placing a warm hand on your shoulder and attempting to impart words of comfort to ease the weight of guilt upon your shoulders. 

“Y/N, really, it’s alright. Don’t beat yourself up about it.”

“Nightwing got beat up because I made a mistake. I let you all down.” You had sulked, pulling on your coat and avoiding her fretful honey gaze. 

She looked at you for several long moments before sighing deeply. It was hard to dig yourself out of this despair in the moment and she knew you needed to let the dust settle before you would take any of her words to heart. So instead of squeezing you in a tight, reassuring hug, she rubbed your back and told you to sleep well. 

You slept. Not well, but you slept. 

The next day had been filled with classes and granola bars and a new pack of highlighters, courtesy of a kindly Tim Drake. 

And now you’re nestled in a Gotham University library study room with the aforementioned boy, trying (and failing) to take notes on ANOVA tests. 

Part of you revels in his worry – it tugged at your heartstrings to know he cared about you, sweet affinity flowering in your chest. But it was a scary thing to be vulnerable, to share your fear of inferiority with a boy that seemed so perfect. You wanted to be the best someday, but you were only starting out, so you’d settle for being good. 

Last night had been bad, to say the least, and you couldn’t shake the heavy drag of inadequacy on your mind. 

Several minutes pass, silent save for the clean swipe of highlighter against paper, before Tim sighs deeply and sits back in his chair. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He frowns and narrows his eyes, pretty mouth pulled into a pout. 

Posture rigid, you meet his eyes. “I’m fine.” You tell him stiffly, setting the stick of neon yellow down on the table. 

“You don’t look fine.” 

“Then stop looking.” You snap, immediately flushing with shame when you see Tim recoil. 

“W-wait, Tim, I’m sorry, that was mean. I appreciate your concern.” You ramble, leaning over the table with wide eyes. 

He recovers from your sharp words quickly and leans closer, too. He places his hand over your own, soft skin and an even softer gaze. 

You think you might lose yourself in the soulful maze of cornflower blue, reflecting deep disquiet for your well-being. You don’t know much, but you know that he wishes for your happiness and the thought makes your insides fizz with warmth. 

“Y/N, you work so hard at everything you do. Give yourself some credit, okay? One mistake does not define you.” Tim’s tone is soothing caress over your heated skin and you’re too frazzled to look anywhere but your hands. 

The set of his mouth is determined. “You’re doing amazing, sweetie.” He quotes a meme and your promptly burst into tears. 

Tim is so startled by your reaction, he can only pale three shades and gawk at you. 

But you’re incapable of choking back the waterworks, a violent torrent of hysterical tears above what might be amused laughter – he can’t quite tell, and neither can you. 

Your shoulders shake, eyes shut tightly and tears streaking down your cheeks.When you sob out an apology, he snaps out of his daze. He squeezes your hand and rounds the table to kneel next to you. He’s not quite sure how to optimally console you, but minimizing physical distance seems like a promising start because you throw your arms around his shoulders and blubber about how awful you feel. 

“I-I want to make Babs p-proud and Bruce and Dick and a-and you, oh god.” You hiccup. 

Brow furrowed, he pulls back to look at you, placing his hands on the sides of your face. 

“Oh, Y/N, you make all of us so proud, you’re always doing so well and striving to improve. It’s an honor to work with you, it would be impossible not to feel proud of you.” 

“How can you be proud of me when I ugly cry about an untied shoe?” You croak and he tenderly wipes your cheeks with his sleeve, soft cotton and a sweet, sweet sigh. 

Tim cracks a smile and it reaches his eyes, a tiny ray of sunshine in this storm of emotion. “Because I know you care so much about what you do. Your mentors appreciate that, and I adore that.”

You freeze, caught off guard enough to reduce the weeping to sniffling. “A-adore?” 

He reddens, blinking rapidly. His hands and his gaze move away shyly. “Well, of course.” He clears his throat. 

A quiet sort of calm washes over the two of you where your breathing evens out and Tim looks at you like you’re rose petals in the wind. 

A sharp knock on the door spooks you so suddenly that you yelp and nearly fall out of the chair.

Tim falls flat on his butt. 

Through the glass door, a librarian scowls at you intensely and wiggles her finger in disapproval before stalking away. 

“I think that made me feel more ashamed than last night.” You whisper. 

“I can go get you hot chocolate and a cookie from the café. Would that make you feel better?” 

You ponder this for a moment. “That might be nice actually.” 

“Crying warrants cookies, I think.” 

The pressure of despair slowly begins to float away, like a red-seeded dandelion unraveling in the wind because Tim’s smile makes you feel so light.

“If you say so.” 

Tim moves to leave, and you stand to stretch, but quickly lean over to peck his cheek. 

The boy freezes on the spot, heat rising in his face so rapidly, you almost expect steam and can’t help the broken giggle that erupts from your throat. 

“You okay, Tim?” 

He barely even blinks, turning away from you slowly. “I’m fine.” 

“You don’t look fine.” 

This seems to revive him, a slow grin spreading across his face, and he turns back to you. 

He glances at you, eyes dancing with mirth, and you look at his lips, thinking for one beautiful moment that he might kiss you.

But the librarian knocks on the glass again. 

“I think everything is going to be okay.”

[talesoftxt]

TXT Hogwarts AU

So this is my first time publicly sharing my writings and I'm really nervous and also kind of excited. Please bear with me, English isn't my first language however I do try to do my best in my works. Anywhos here's my first post I hope you guy enjoy!

Yeonjun

•Slytherin

•pureblood

•was shunned his whole life due to his parents being deatheaters in the second wizarding war

•raised by his grandmother who he loves to pieces

•don't tell anyone but grandma choi actually raised him muggle style so he's very knowledgable when it comes to them

•his one and only friend is soobin, that is of course before he met the three other boys

•the sorting hat barely even touched his head before it announced "slytherin"

•worked his way up until he became what he is today

•his goal is to erase the stigma of slytherins being evil

•intimidates everyone with his sharp eyes and blank face but don't be fooled, he's as extra and wild as the others

•once dared himself to wrestle with the black lake's giant squid

•always aims to be the best at everything, probably to the point of overworking himself

•as a first year flying had come naturally to him and easily became his favourite subject but was soon replaced by defence against the dark arts

•the boy is a quick thinker and could disarm his opponent in a matter of seconds, though he is good at casting other spells he opts for a defensive style of duelling

•ever since he was young he dreamt of being an auror

•the team captain of slytherin's quidditch team, his swiftness and agility earned him the title "best chaser"

•dubbed as "slytherin's prince" his housemates respect and look up to him

•don't cross him.just don't.

•very cautious when it comes to picking his friends and is very protective of soobin because he's just too damn precious

•gets along with kai really well because theyre both crackheads and kai is too cute not to like

•isn't one to share his feelings but because of his friends he's getting more and more open

•his greatest fear is becoming evil and hurting his friends

•he's really just a tiny bean who loves his friends and would do anything for them

Soobin

•pureblood

•Ravenclaw

•coming from a very traditional pureblood family, he doesn't really understand muggle lifestyle

•a straight A student prefect and athlete, he's the epitome of model student

•doesn't like to break the rules but somehow always finds himself staying up with taehyun or getting dragged to the dark forest by kai

•takes away points by decimals just because he thinks its funny

•can get pretty scary when someone questions his authority

•"out of bed past curfew? 4.23 points from gryffindor" "is that even allowed??"

•he's a responsible prefect and shuts everyone up with one stern look

•number one on the school's boyfriend material list (because c'mon he's like perfect)

•a perfect gentleman who's ready to help with a dimpled smile on his face

•takes muggle studies because he likes muggles and wants to know about them more

•still doesn't know what the function of a rubber duck is

•can cook up a potion even without the help of a guide and can recognize a herb by it's texture alone

•his favourite subjects are potions and herbology

•probably because the two are kind of connected in a way

•literally has a journal where he writes down everything he's learned about muggles

•nearly cried when he received a toaster from taehyun as a gift because he's always wanted one for his bread

•wants to be a healer in the future

•his future career also helps because all his friends can't go a day without injuring themselves

•keeper soobin (you gets?because the boy is such a keeper?hehehehe)

•his tall stature and quick reflexes helps him block quaffles from the opposite team

•recognizes hueningkai as his number one cheerer and never fails to wink at him before the start of every game

•always makes sure taehyun gets enough sleep, beomgyu and kai stay out of trouble and keeps yeonjun from overworking himself

•they always make sure to bring him back little muggle trinkets after they come back from the holidays

•the boys are just really thankful for soobin existance and love him so much

•choi soobin is a lovable and amazing bunny (that's the tea sis)

Beomgyu

•gryffindor

•half-blood

•gets himself into pretty stupid situations just bc he's too damn heroic

•always stirs up trouble but somehow charms himself out of it

•he's like,really charming

•made mcgonagall blush that one time

•he's absolutely cunning,his ability to hide his true intentions behind an angelic smile scares the crap out of the boys

•just don't mess with his friends

•bc of this the sorting hat actually took longer to sort him than usual wondering whether it should put him in slytherin or gryffindor, he had almost been a hatstall but after a silent debate between the two beomgyu had chosen gryffindor bc they had and i quote 'pretty colours'

•had to be physically restrained by soobin and yeonjun after he tried to fight a student who had called taehyun a "mudblood"

•Charms and transfiguration are his areas of expertise

•favourite spell is "accio" and practically uses it for everything

•"accio yeonjun hyung's clothes "beomgyu!"

•"accio taehyun's love of his life" "bold of you to assume i have any I-" "accio taehyun's books" "you little shi-"

•takes muggle studies just for the hell of it and because it's easy

•gryffindor's seeker,this boy could spot a snitch from miles away

•has his own fanclub with members from all four houses

•yes that's how charming he is

•no one really knows how but beomgyu always manages to enter all three other houses' common rooms

•his favourite hang out place would probably be ravenclaw's common room

•annoying taehyun is this guy's favourite past time, he just finds it cute when the younger glares at him

•if he's not annoying taehyun he's probably off pulling pranks and causing trouble all around the castle

•is currently grooming kai to become a prankster like him, he just has to figure out a way to stop the boy from being so goddamn loud everytime they prank someone

•in general he's a chaotic mess but everyone still loves him

Taehyun

•Ravenclaw

•muggleborn

•once something catches his eye he makes it a goal to learn everything about it

•no one really knows what to expect with taehyun probably bc he was so quiet and introverted

•as he gets used to life in the magical world he starts to become more confident and bold

•"why do we still use quills when ballpens literally exists?''

•''are you serious?a letter?kai you have a phone use it''

•his wisdom and good advices remind people why he's in ravenclaw

•his two favourite subjects are transfiguration and history of magic

•transfigured soobin into a bunny once at kai's request (well probably just to shut him up)

•history nerd and draco malfoy enthusiast

•''he was only a child!''

•doesn't even bother to answer the riddles' properly

•"where do vanished objects go?" "somewhere other than where they were vanished from,duh."

•usually found in the common room late at night cramming homeworks he's been putting on hold bc he found something much more interesting to do

•legend says prefect soobin always stays up with him (no one knows if its true or not no one has ever tried to find out in fear of facing choi soobin's wrath if he finds them out of bed)

•an excellent beater, taehyun's one of the best in their team even at such a young age

•rumours are he's one of the candidates for next team captain

•is soobin's source of muggle knowledge, probably bc kai only teaches them memes and popular vines and beomgyu just cant be bothered with

•claims he loses braincells every time kai opens his mouth but deep down he loves the boy like his brother

•looks up to his yeonjun and soobin hyungs

•unbothered king 24/7

Kai

•hufflepuff

• the boy literally dragged taehyun with him and introduced himself to nearly everyone during the train ride

•half-blood

•never fails to say "me dad's a muggle; mam's a witch,bitofanastyshockforhim

whenhefoundout" every time he introduces himself

•and i mean EVERY.SINGLE.TIME

•excels in care of magical creatures (probably bc every single creature falls in love with the boy on sight) and almost always accompanies hagrid to the dark forest

•let's be real ya'll the dark forest probably isn't so dark anymore with the amount of sunshine kai emits

•nearly gave soobin a heart attack when he had dragged the elder into the dark forest

•at the age of 13 the dark forest was just a forest to kai, "wild centaurs?bitch please i braid baby centaurs hair on saturdays"

•idolizes newt scamander and wants to be a magizoologist because he wants to change people's minds about magical creatures and show them how beautiful and precious they actually are

•'pet a dragon's belly' is listed number 1 in his bucket list

• 'ohmygod hueningkai don't you even dare try to rock that mandrake' 'but hyun its so cute!it looks like an ugly baby!'

•takes a liking for divination and unlike others actually appreciates and pays attention in class

•probably because of his close relationship with the forest's centaurs who also use divination in their day to day lives

•is a skilled flyer and was invited to try out for his house's quidditch team but turned it down

•he prefers to cheer for people rather than getting cheered on

•people don't really know who he cheers for most of the time bc he's like present in every game

•mysteriously gets louder and more energetic when ravenclaw plays most people think it's bc his bestfriend taehyun is playing but taehyun knows the truth

•"you did great hyun!" "i literally saw you stare at soobin hyung's ass the entire game"

•no one can hate this guy,it’s physically impossible

•even the meanest kids don’t pick on him,he’s THAT lovable

Anyways that all for today! That's my opinion on the txt's hogwarts houses,don't be shy and tell me what you think! See you later guys!

[lucy-in-the-house]

☆~Oc info sheet~☆

So I decided to get off my lazy @ss and post this :b

^^^sketch of my oc(tails and ears not included)doing one of her favorite passtimes, free-run parkour in search of a wall to graffiti^^^

☆*Full name*☆

Lucy Jeanette Eileen Giroud

☆*Nicknames*☆

Lu

"The fox"

☆*Sign*☆

Scorpio

☆*Birthday*☆

16/11

☆*Age*☆

17 (physically)

☆*Status*☆

Alive

☆*Race*☆

Half human/half demon

☆*Ethnicity*☆

French-American-British

☆*Gender*☆

Pineapple. Just kidding, Female

☆*Height*☆

1m62

☆*Weight*☆

50kg

☆*Blood type*☆

HH, also known as 'Bombay Blood'

☆*Eye color*☆

Hazel

☆*Hair color*☆

Orange/Red

☆*Occupation*☆

2nd year highschool student, or in France: Terminale student. And the personal bodyguard of the heir to a worldwide criminal organization.

☆*Relatives*☆

-Eliott Giroud (older brother).

-Lisana Teatly (Lily for short, childhood friend).

-Thomas Carlson (childhood friend)

☆*Hobbies*☆

Drawing, 'performing arts' (dancing, singing, theatre,...), playing video games, watching anime and listening to Kpop.

☆*Favorite food*☆

Chocolate and any soft, and not sour, candy.

☆*Favorite drink*☆

Powerade

Bubble tea

Iron bru (for the meme)

☆*For dem shipzzzz*☆

I like to ship her with Laito :3

/(0^0)/

☆*Quotes*☆

"Crazy is such an ugly word. I prefer... mentally unstable."

"I ain't no fox!"

"You vamps are literally oversized mosquitos"

"*Irish accent* you wanna go mate? You wanna fight? I'll bash ye 'ead in! I swear on meh mom I'll destroy ya!"

"Well imma just skiddadle the heck outta here"

"Hon Hon Hon I am very française!"

"GO GET DESTROYED!"

"*T pose* I'm the meme Lord and punmaster. Fear my powerrrrr..."

"If you're feeling suicidal you came to the right place! Cuz I'm gonna f*****g kill myself as well"

"BTS are true Gods. No need for Jesus when I got these sunshines."

☆*Clothes*☆

She will usually wear a red or purple hoodie with black shorts (sometimes jeans) with pink thigh highs and white shoes. She always has three hairclips to hold up the right part of her fringe. She has a pair of red glasses but doesn't wear them often because she forgets. She is very pale (mostly because of her unbalanced health) and is a bit chubby, she's a bit too busty for her age (but seriously doesn't give a damn).

☆*Personality*☆

She's a really laid back and bubbly girl, who has a bad case of swearing, and talking about morbid subjects with problem. She a good person, though she might be psycopathic. However, she's absolutely horrible at socializing, as a child she never had the chance to, so she has difficulty opening up to others, or speaking to people she isn't familiar with. Apart from that, she can get very sassy and sarcastic with a pinch of salt. She gets easily triggered like say sh&t about her fam and she'll diss yo @ss. She's also a 'daredevil', and will never say no to a challenge. She a kind soul with a pinch of spicyness and MEMES.

And although she's a weirdo, she a good and respectful student.

And I almost forgot, she a Kpop fan and an otaku (not a weaboo) so her social life is n o n e x i s t a n t.

☆*History*☆

(Note: her history is long, but if you read it all you'll get a cookie🍰🍩🍰🍪🍪🍪🍪)

Lucy was born in an average family. She grew up in france, though she was born in america. Her life at home was pretty normal, though she didn't get along very well with her father or siblings, but Lucy was pretty close to her mother who was like a best friend to her. At school however, she was constantly bullied, both mentally and physically. The reasons were one because she was the only child with red hair in her school (and they thought she had some contamination), and because she didn't fit in any social groups.

She grew up thinking she was a freak of nature and a disgrace, cursed to be alone, that love was something she'd ever experience and learned that the only way to be left alone was by being creepy and/or violent.

However, she managed to make friends with two people, and she made her mind to protect them no matter what. The bullying went on for 10 years. Her parents tried taking her to therapists, doctors, psycologist, but not one could fix her broken mind. So the only option they had left was to send her away to her Uncle and Cousin, after that day, she never saw her biological family again. (Except for her brother)

Her cousin Caitlin (who is now dead) was like an older sister, and was nice to her. She soon found out that her family came down from generations of monster hunters, her uncle was one, and so was her cousin, her cousin taught her how to fight, and the weakness of practically every monster that she could remember. But her cousin's intentions behind educating her on this topic was to find herself a replacement, to kill a demon she had summoned a few years back. Caitlin had sacrificed her soul to a demon to obtain the weapon needed, which she gave to Lucy.

After her cousin dissapeared, she went back to her hometown and reunited with her friends. She spent the next year hunting the demon her cousin was aiming for, but little did she know that the demon was also looking for her. When they finally encountered, it was a hard battle. Lucy won, but barely alive, having a big scar going across her torso. But before the demon died, it infuses its soul into Lucy's body, giving Lucy it's powers and cursing her with immortality. After that fight, she went back to her friends. They traveled down to the South of France and settled there, trying to live 'normal' lives... Until one day, she received orders from [...] to live with the sakamakis.

☆*Relationships*☆

-Eliott: they almost never interact, although they are family. They only speak when it comes to business or important matters.

-Lily: they are very close, Lily is one of the only two people who know Lucy inside out. Lucy has sworn to protect Lily even if it would cost her life. They love to hangout together and cry over fandoms.

-Thomas: same as Lily, except he's like a mom, always taking care of Lucy, even when she says she doesn't need help, they both share a love for kpop and anime. Lucy's emotional bond with Thomas is stronger than anyone else she's close to, even Lily.

☆*Abilities*☆

As Lucy is half demon, she gained most of the abilities of the demon who infused itself into her, who was a shadow demon:

-increased strength and hearing

-teleportation

-she can sorta float

-the shadow realm: by jumping into a shadow (a person's shadow, object's shadow, any shadow at all) she can enter an dimension called "the shadow realm", a place only shadow demon may access

-a little thing I like to call Katherine: Katherine was the 'name' of the demon Lucy fought with, this ability activities when she deadly mad or under too much stress or pressure that she just snaps and goes psycho. She has strange black tentacles (like a kagune from Tokyo ghoul). She will attack anything around her. Only Thomas and Lily can control her under this form.

Lucy has been fighting since as long as she can remember, so she is very skilled in the domaine.

Although she might not have all the abilities of the demon, she's still more powerful than a demon, as the fact she has emotions (which demons don't) has a great impact on her powers.

Lucy can't die from age ot sickness. But she candie from bloodloss and getting wounded, as she heals only slightly faster than a human.

☆*other info*☆

1-Lucy was the second eldest of her biological family.

2-she enherited half of her father's company (the other half her older brother) and her family's mansion.

3-she an absolute virgin :/ *le sad music*

4-She's left handed, therefore her capacity at cutting meat is non-exigent (true story, left handed people struggle more at cutting meat, and I'm talking out of experience because I am left handed)

5-she speaks fluent English and French (Those were the two languages she spoke throughout her childhood), she also learned German, Japanese and is trying to learn Korean. She's also fluent in Shakespearean and in both English and Australian slang.

6-in the south of France, she goes to a highly reputed international campus.

7-lucy doesn't like physical contact whatsoever, except for Thomas and Lily, and she can just about tolerate Laito but She gets really flushed and embarrassed. She gets uncomfortable when people touch her hair, shoulders, lower back and thighs, if someone does touch her there she'll flinch and try to pry them off.

8-she only wears clothes that fully cover her body because she's a very self aware person and she's covered in scars because of her sh&tty childhood.

[treadmilltreats]

Being grateful for my life

With my birthday yesterday it really gets you thinking. About life, about gratitude, about your health, about relationships, about many things in your life.

For me, first and foremost I give thanks to God for another year, because I know all too well that so many people haven't been lucky enough to see another birthday in these last few years.

I know.. there before the grace of God goes I… which means it could have been me but God's grace gave me another year and I am so very grateful for it.

As much as I've been through in my life, as many losses I've endured, as much hurt as I felt. Betrayals, lied to, cheated on, being knocked down over and over. Through addiction, rape, and suicide attempts, I know that I still want to be here. I know that yes, I will experience more heartbreak but I still want to be here. I want to be that meme that when it's my time I go screeching into my grave screaming "What a frigging ride!!"

Yes, I want to be that 90 year body builder or triathlon runner. I want to inspire others until my last breath. Life is so precious, it is so beautiful even with all the scars you get along the way.

The scars just make you more beautiful, they tell your story, your survival.

I know that I am blessed beyond measure. I know that God has always walked beside me and many times carried me when I could no longer walk. I know that it's rare to have so many dear friends and family that you love and that are there for you. I know that I am blessed,

I shouldn't be here but yet I am. I should have lost my mind but I didn't...lose all of it. I still have my humor, obviously. I still have my Tinkerbell beliefs about the good in people, the happily ever after in life. I see the cup half filled even though so many times people have emptied it on me. I see the positive even when I see so much negative. I chose to keep going when so many have chosen to give up.

There is not a day that goes by that I don't say a prayer of thanks for the life I have now. That he has helped me overcome drugs, rape, depression, my many losses and my suicidal thoughts. That I can do my own thing, that I no longer have to walk on eggshells, that I truly love me now and am okay with being by myself rather than trying to please someone who will never be pleased. I am blessed to have peace and joy in my life, in my home and in my heart.

It has taken many years to get here, many painful moments, I had to claw my way out of some holes. I got knocked down too many times to count but I am here, I kept getting back up, refusing to give up, to say uncle. For that strength I am also grateful for, for my determination, for my beliefs, for my life all of it the good, the bad and even the really ugly, I am grateful.

So today my friends I am telling you all of this because I am no different than any of you. There is no magic secret, I just believed, I fought and I refused to give up that's all it takes. You must learn to love yourself, know your worth, let go of what and who is not working for you. Figure out what you want, make a plan, and do it!

Don't make excuses, we all have them as I say all the time...insert your sob story here...think Nike..just do it.

Will it be easy? Come on, is anything in life worth having easy? No, it won't but it will be so worth it. When everyday you wake up, at peace with joy and you too will be giving thanks for your life.

"Be the change you want to see"

@Treadmilltreats

Join our women's community @SoulSistersSoulution

"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

**Now released my latest book**

The Blessing in Disguise.... revealed

https://www.amazon.com/Blessing-Disguise-Revealed-story-faith/dp/1074340493/ref=sr_1_19?keywords=the+blessing+in+disguise&qid=1561392004&s=books&sr=1-19

***Now available***

My 1st book The blessing in Disguise

Selling on my website:

Http://www.treadmilltreats.com

And on Amazon.com

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