#like you had to play ONE RACE AND GENDER to romance that guy!!! in a game with more romance options than any prior da game!!

[baelavelaryon]

I'm so happy for you guys and your ugly fucking boyfriend I'm serious.

[palajae]

hypegirl! | final.

PAIRING ▸ soccer player! niki x afab! reader

GENRE ▸ soccerl! au, roommates!au, she's the man! au, romance, fluff, angst, humor

WORD COUNT ▸ 4k

SUMMARY ▸ all you want is to join the boys’ soccer team. all niki wants is to get minji’s attention. as roommates, what better than to strike a deal and help each other out? nothing really, except for one glaring issue: your blossoming feelings for said roommate. oh, and the fact that you’re technically supposed to be your brother, kim sunoo. 

AKA a hopefully more sfw version of she's the man? 

NOTES ▸ based off she’s the man (2006), reader is sunoo's sister and pretends to be her brother sunoo, gender swap, like one curse word, kissing,— please let me know if there’s any typos!

masterlist. | previous.

I DON’T WANNA FIGHT YOUR SHADOW…

“what? you want to do what?”

niki doesn’t say anything as his head hangs low. he stares at the ground, dark eyebags prominent. 

“niki,” jungwon sighs in exasperation, “let’s think rationally about this. we’ve been working toward this day for weeks. this is it. we can’t make any last minute changes now.” 

“right,” jay chimes in. 

“sunoo’s become a valuable player on the team. we need him. seriously, what could have possibly happened that you suddenly want to kick him off the day of playoffs?” 

niki only shakes his head as the rest of the team exchanges looks. 

“sorry man, but we keep personal business off the field. sunoo’s in, whether you like it or not.” 

sunoo’s worried—to say the least. between you not replying to any of his texts and the current dilemma at hand, he isn’t sure what to do. 

all he can do is clench his trusty flute as his band arrives at your camp. 

it’s hectic, with kids and directors running around attempting to prepare the performance for the game. essentially a perfect chance for sunoo to sneak and snoop around. 

sunoo manages to spot the boys locker room, and he takes his chance. 

the minute he steps in, he’s greeted by the smell of deodorant, grass, and… the mustiness of sport locker rooms. 

guys are everywhere, clothes and gear strewn all over the place as they prepare for the tournament. 

he glances around for any sight of you, not exactly sure what to look for but still keeping an eye out for a smaller figure. sunoo takes about three steps forward, until he yelps. 

he feels an arm roughly pulling him toward the side, and he whips his head around. 

“sunoo-dude, where were you? we were starting to think you weren’t gonna show up! get changed, the first match is gonna start soon.” 

his heart drops. no way, did they think he was-

a jersey is flung at his face. somehow, in the midst of the chaos, face paint is slathered onto his face, effectively concealing his identity even more. 

where were you? 

first match, first half—to everyone’s shock—enhypen’s down. 

most yells are directed at, who’d you least expect, kim sunoo. 

“kim! what are you doing?” 

“pass! no-here! to me! ”

“why are you so slow today?!”

all sunoo can do is apologize while wheezing. he wasn’t built for this. it’s not like he had much of a choice, he was shoved onto the field. 

at one point, jungwon’s eyes flash at him and he visibly shrinks.

“dude, i don’t know what’s going on, but we’re subbing you out.” 

you jump up to the sound of cheers, an announcer yelling—

“and enhypen takes home their first win with a great comeback in the second half!”

enhypen? win? comeback?

you scramble to your feet, heart racing. 

crap. what time was it?

you pat your pockets to no avail. 

that’s right—your phone was left in your dorm…that you couldn’t access because niki kicked you out. 

more cheers from outside bring you back to your current situation. you overslept since you didn’t have your phone alarm. 

the tournament started. enhypen played and won their first match, without you. 

you frown, scrambling to get to the stadium. who in the world played for you? 

once you make it past the crowd of people, coaches, and players, you scan the field. 

and your mouth drops open. 

on the opposite side of the soccer field, sitting on the bench right in front of you, was kim sunoo. the real one, your brother. 

he was decked out in face paint and—

was that your uniform? 

somehow, you manage to make eye contact. you begin mouthing words furiously at him, only for him to point at the crowd. 

frowning, you turn around toward the audience and performing band. you squint. 

your mouth drops again. because there in the crowd, sitting in the middle row right in front of you, were your parents.

immediately, you turn around and flee toward the locker rooms, signaling for sunoo to follow while everyone was still distracted with your team’s win. 

you don’t even get to take a single step when the announcer clears his throat to say something. 

“attention everyone! enhypen is disqualified. they must forfeit this match and immediately report to the main office.” 

gasps and protests immediately ring out. 

you hide behind a water cooler, gauging the guys reactions. they all look confused and upset. 

niki stalks over to the camp director and coach, where an unimpressed taehyun stands with his arms crossed. 

“what’s going on? why do we have to forfeit? we won fair and square, there’s no-“

“i wouldn’t count lying and having a girl on your team as fair and square, nishimura.”

the whole team outbursts, while your coach sighs, rubbing his hand over his face. 

the director eyes sunoo, “we have pretty good reason and evidence to believe that kim sunoo is not who he—or she—states they are.” 

sunoo immediately stands up as the rest of the team gapes at him.

“females are not allowed at this camp, let alone allowed on a team to play in the final championships.”

taehyun nods. he had found too many irregularities with you, kim sunoo. the conversations with your mom, video footage of you sneaking into the locker rooms as a guy and exiting as a girl, and the fake sideburns and eyebrows in the trash can. 

niki stands still, hands clenched as he glares at sunoo. 

he can hear the rest of the guys whispering in disbelief.

“this makes no sense. how could he be a girl after all this time?”

“and no one noticed…”

“—this is absurd.”

the announcer sighs, and speaks up once more to the entire stadium. “i apologize once again to the crowd and opponent team for the inconvenience. enhypen will be removed from the tournament due to dishonesty and lack of regards for the rules. 

i do not want to repeat it—no females are allowed to play on any team for any reason whatsoever!”

you gasp, covering a hand over your mouth. you were still partially hidden, and you know if you were found, it would be over. 

sunoo sighs, facing the guys and camp director. 

“put enhypen back in the game. we didn’t break any rules. i’m not a girl.” 

taehyun’s eyes narrow. “you can’t lie your way out of it again. we have all the evidence we need.”

sunoo gestures out grandly, toward your team and the crowd. 

“do i have to spell it out to you? i’m a guy. this is ridiculous. what, you want me to prove i’m not a girl? i’ll pull down my pants or-“

clamor follows, but it’s stopped by a desperate yell. 

you watch from afar, as your parents stalk up to the director. your mother, as expected, seems adamant as she validates her son’s words. 

“excuse me, but there seems to be an issue with my son, here. there’s no possible way you would be doubting his identity?”

“ma’am, we have submitted evidence that your son sunoo is actually a-“

“and so do i. would you like to see his birth certificate? i didn’t pay for my son to attend this camp to simply get disqualified for a ridiculous accusation.”

after a few minutes of deliberation, against taehyun’s protests, the director sighs and rubs his hands together. you hold your breath. the verdict?

“we apologize for our mistake—enhyphen is not disqualified and will be moving on to the next round. let the next match commence!”

you watch your team breathe a sigh of relief, clapping sunoo on the back. but your gaze can’t seem to stay off of niki. he stays off to the side, fists still clenched. he hasn’t looked or said a single word to sunoo—you. 

you know him, there’s a storm brewing inside. 

and it’s all because of you. 

you see the crowd return to normal, your mom furiously spewing nonsense as your parents walk back to their seats. 

you nod at your brother, this is your chance. 

you run towards an empty hallway, waiting for your brother to bring you your clothes. 

“sorry,” sunoo heaves, “they’re sweaty.”

“it’s okay,” you grab them and shut the unused closet door behind you. “i’m used to it by now.”

sunoo waits outside the old janitor closet, keeping watch as you change and exchange identities, once again. 

once you exit, sunoo’s eyes widen.

“wow, you look exactly like me.” 

you smirk. “and you’re horrible at soccer.”

he shoves you softly and you laugh. “thanks bro. i really owe you one for saving me out there.”

he nods, “anything for my sister. i need to sneak back to the band though. let me know if you need anything and good luck.” 

you hug him quickly. “of course.” the confidence that surged through you as you walked back toward the field, knowing your brother had your back, empowers you. 

“guys,” you call out, “i’m back. what’s going on?”

some of the guys still send you weird looks, but you ignore it. niki’s still ignoring you, and it makes a dreadful feeling grow in the pit of your stomach. 

the matches were cut down in order to fit all of them in one day and preserve the player’s energies. 

but your team was excelling. you had already advanced to the semifinals, as expected. with you back and eager to play, the team was running smoothly. 

after winning your third match, jay and heeseung high five you. 

“nice, sunoo. i don’t know what happened to you during the first game, but you redeemed yourself.” you cough, muttering some lame excuse. 

everything was going great, all except for one person. every break, time out, the whole time, niki acted as if you didn’t exist. 

in the middle of the game, you would keep up with him, waiting for him to pass the ball. but niki being the stubborn person he was, ignored you and tried to keep going even when you were open.

mistakes were costly, and you could feel the tension building up. the other guys were getting agitated, you could tell, but he wouldn’t budge. 

you kept telling yourself, one more match. all you needed to do was win one more match and that would be it. 

it was nearing the end of the day. everyone was sweaty and exhausted. half the crowd had left, but your parents were still there, cheering for their son meanwhile in reality, he was playing in the band a few meters away in the stands and their daughter was on the field. 

the final match was occurring, enhypen vs. zerobaseone. you knew, it wasn’t going to be easy. not with an uncooperative niki. 

and by the first half, you were right. after calling out niki so many times to pass the ball and receiving nothing in response, everyone was on edge. 

the score was still 0-0. several times niki would get the ball stolen or make the ball go out, all while ignoring you. you swear he even tripped you at one point. 

at halftime, your coach and teammates were fed up too. “come on, niki. get your head in the game!”

“what’s going on with you and sunoo today?”

“you’re costing us too many opportunities. kim’s open and you’re obviously not giving it to him for a reason! figure it out, nishimura.” 

all he does is shake his head, chugging water and staying silent. 

you’re tired. your coach shakes his head in frustration, muttering off about personal issues.  

the team is completely off balance, and everyone can feel it. 

but only you can do something about it. 

with heavy breaths, you match up to niki in front of the whole team. 

“nishimura riki!” you call out his real name, causes him to react for a second with the slight widening of his eyes before he reverts to his cold facade again. 

“why are you doing this right now? we’re a team, now that we got so far, don’t you want to win?

“maybe you should’ve thought about that before lying to me and breaking our friendship,“ he replies ruthlessly.  

you sigh, pinching your nose bridge, “it wasn’t my intention to do so! i never had any intention of doing so, and i never will! i don’t like minji and i never tried to get with her.”

you exhale, trying to calm yourself while the whole team was watching. 

“i will never like minji.”

he scoffs, “why should I believe you after everything?”

“because the whole time i’ve been genuine. you’re one of my closest friends i’ve made here at the camp. if i really wanted to date minji, i would have told you that. you know i tried my best to help you,” your voice cracks at the last sentence. 

he looks confused for a second before his eyes harden. 

“whatever, it doesn’t matter anymore. i can’t trust anything you say or do now.”

you grab his arm, desperate. 

“we’ve been honest about everything, haven’t we? i don’t want to lose you, and i don’t want our team to lose this chance of winning. i don’t care about minji. i could prove it right now.”

he challenges you, eyes dark. just like he had since the first day. 

“how? how will you prove it?” 

you close your eyes, taking in a deep breath. you decided this was your chance to let it all out. after this, you would go home anyway. whether you would be forced back to your old, mundane life as your mother wanted was up to the future. you open your eyes, finally feeling like yourself as you begin taking off the fake sideburns, eyebrows, and finally, the wig. 

“like i said, i don’t care about minji.”

you finally untie your hair and shake it out free. 

“i care about you.” 

with an eruption of shocked gasps and whispers, you falter. perhaps you should have waited until after the final game. your true identity and appearance were revealed. everything was out in the open.  

niki states blankly at you, chest heaving. 

you think you faintly hear your parents shriek your name. ignoring them, you step closer to him. 

“i’m sorry. i’m sorry that i lied to you about this. but please believe me when i say i’m y/n, and i never meant to hurt you. so for right now, can we save this for later and just focus on beating the crap out of our opponents?”

you take the chance to glance around, seeing everyone’s shocked expressions.

silence falls as your coach speaks up, “this is illegal…”

you glance away, unable to say or do anything. 

what you don’t expect is the team’s clamors, especially from jungwon who you abruptly make eye contact with. 

he’s the first to speak up and advocate for you staying on the team. 

“coach we all knew the rules… but we can’t not let her play after she’s proven herself all this time.”

“it’s unfair to deny her the right to play after she’s been working so hard this entire season with us!”

as the rest of the boys join in, your coach looks helplessly at the director. soon enough, people from the audience join in too. 

you can’t help the hopeful smile that breaks out on your face, seeing your parents still in shock yet not disapproving.  

after a couple of minutes of deliberation (and your internal praying and pleading) along with the crowd and band’s support, the camp director begrudgingly allows you to play. 

the guys cheer, clapping you on the back and high-fiving you. all except niki, who still lingers at the side with an unreadable expression. 

then, it’s time to play. 

it feels different, already. you feel different—with the wind blowing your hair behind you and the ability to speak in your normal voice, act as your normal self.

no, to be your normal self.

you ran faster, spotted clearer, worked harder. you felt renewed. 

and once you saw the opening, with three minutes left, you glance at niki desperately. you hoped you conveyed everything in your face at that split second, like extending your arm out and hoping he would help you up from the ground. 

niki cleanly passes the ball to you, just so you can score a final goal. 

you don’t even realize it, once the final whistle blows, you almost collapse onto the grass. 

roars erupt in the air, people around you lift you up and throw you around. yet, your eyes are only on one figure to your left. somehow, in all the commotion, niki grabs your hand in happiness. then he realizes the situation and your grip is broken by your ecstatic team. 

your eyes lock for a moment before niki turns away, head slightly shaking and you frown. 

you won. but at what cost? 

on the last day of camp, after surprisingly receiving a lot of praise from your parents on your performance (as well as an apology from keeping you and sunoo from your respective passions), you finish packing up everything. 

when you got back to the dorms last night, niki was sleeping with the lights off and his back to you. you were still hurt, but at least he let you back into your room. 

you pack up silently, in case he was sleeping. 

even if he was asleep, you speak up softly. 

“i’m sorry. i’m really, really sorry niki….”

his shadowy figure remains unmoving. 

“i-i hope you know everything i ever said and did was genuine. at least, to me it was. i li-“ you bite the words back on your tongue. 

“i cared about you a lot. i care about you a lot. i’ll cherish this summer forever. thank you for the best memories. thank you for changing my life completely. thank you for being you, riki.” 

figuring that anything you two had was over, you got your stuff ready to go while blinking away the tears. 

during the final breakfast, you talked to minji and apologized. she took it much better than you expected, promising to keep in touch as real friends now with no hard feelings left. 

the boys on your team were just as quick to warm up to you. besides consoling you over niki, they promised to keep in touch as well. you were more than glad and appreciative to have friends and soccer mates. 

in your daze, reflecting over the course of the last day or so, you feel your phone vibrate. 

[11:36 am] sunbro: we’re on our way back  

[11:37 am] sunbro: better hurry up if you’re not packed and ready!

you gather your stuff and say your final goodbyes to your coaches, friends, and finally, the camp. 

you’re happy and sad to be leaving it all behind. maybe until next year now that they decided to let girls join this soccer camp. 

with your heavy bags, you trudge along your way outside. you stared around at the campus for the last time by yourself. 

it was strange to have some peace and quiet without the ruckus of the soccer camp and guys. one last attempt to capture everything one last time—one of your most memorable and life changing summers. 

and maybe a tiny bit of you was searching, holding onto that little piece of hope just to see that one person’s face for the last time. 

but it’s silent. you come to a slow when you reach the gates, gathering your stuff to head out. 

now you wait. you wait to leave with much more than you entered with. 

sighing, you freeze when you hear shuffling, the sound of… footsteps approaching you?

you don’t want to get your hopes up, but you hold your breath. 

turning around, you see him. 

your grip on the suitcase squeezes harder. 

he looks divine, comfy in his last day fit that wasn’t his jersey or training uniform. 

“hey,” he starts off. 

“hi,” you breathe. for some reason, you can’t bring yourself to meet his intense gaze.

niki doesn’t say anything at first, so you take the chance to speak up. 

“what’s up? i figured… you wouldn’t want anything to do with me.”   

hands shoved in his pockets, he fidgets on his feet. a tiny smile appears on your face. 

“i don’t know, there’s a lot i’ve been thinking about.”

your chest tightens. “i see. d-do you want to share?” you finally look him in the eye and it’s like time freezes. 

niki isn’t able to handle seeing you like this, your real self. he thought you were too pretty for your own good. too good at pretending to be a guy and too good at making him react like this without even doing anything. without even knowing. 

he thought it was over too. but after he heard what you said that night after the championships, he couldn’t stop thinking about you. about the entire summer with you. this time, he wouldn’t let you slip away from him like you did at the fair.

niki glances down, taking a few steps closer as your eyes widen. “i miss my roommate who was also one of my closest friends. i really, really liked him. but i also really, really like the girl i met at the fair. she was beautiful, charming, uplifting.”

you place a hand over your chest, “i think they feel the same way,” you whisper. 

“i’m really sorry that i didn’t tell you,” you start off, “i was afraid of getting caught-and of all the consequences, so i tried to hide and cover everything up. it was incredibly selfish of me to hurt others, you, without realizing it. i’m so sorry.”

niki reaches a hand out to grab yours, “yeah, you hurt me. but you also healed me. in more ways than you think. i think, if you hadn’t snuck in as a guy, we would have never met and gotten as close as we did. you really changed my life too.” 

he says your name, and you look at him. hesitantly, fearfully. 

as if you would mess it all up again and he would leave you once more. 

you swallow. 

“everything we did together as friends, as someone i wasn’t, just made me like you even more as myself.” 

he takes a step closer. 

“is there any chance we could start over?”

niki chuckles and you feel your face getting hot.

“i’m nishimura riki. and you are?”

you stare down at his offered hand in shock. 

it takes only a second for you to proudly state your name, reaching a hand out to meet his. 

“a pretty name for a pretty face.”

you flush. where did this side of niki come from? 

“it’s very nice to meet you,” he adds, “quite nice. almost an honor after all the things i heard about you, well, from yourself-“ 

you shove niki. there was his playful side again. you relax a little seeing him be more like his old self. 

although, he catches your arm and quickly pulls you into him. 

you almost yelp, wide eyes boring into his playful ones. it feels comfortable in his embrace, almost like home. 

the distance between you two closes, smiles on your faces growing as you feel your heartbeats collide when his lips finally touch yours. 

“bye mom! i’ll text you later, sunoo!”

your mom yells for you to be careful as you slam the door shut behind you (not without giving your brother a quick hug on the way out).

you carry your duffel bag on one arm as you head over to the waiting vehicle, with a particularly dashing man inside. 

he, however, gets out as you run towards him. he picks you up and spins you around as you laugh at his excitement—it was his favorite sound that he could never get enough of.

he places a sweet kiss on your lips and you smile happily at him. 

“you ready to play, babe?”

“as ready as i’ll ever be, bro.” 

“you totally just did not call your loving, awesome, superior boyfriend that…”

“but i did?” you raise an eyebrow as to challenge him, “and you’re gonna accept it because you like me too much.” 

with a sigh, your boyfriend heeds your words as he always does. 

niki’s arms stay forever wrapped around you and your soccer bag as he awkwardly walks the both of you to your side of the car. 

“whatever, let’s just go kick some ass.” 

“oh, you bet i will.”

a/n ▸ hi guys... surprise?? yes, i'm alive. i was in the hospital for a little and really needed to focus on my health so i decided to take a break. i apologize for the longass wait on the ending of this series, so i crammed to get it done :) thank you as always for the support and love. i appreciate all the feedback <3 i'll be trying to get back on a better, more consistent schedule so see you guys soon again!

MAIN TAGLIST ▸ @precioussoulofmine @kynrki @heesterical @jungwonize @rerequire @nvertheless @duolingofanaccount @hoeshii @love-4-keum @nyanggk @luvhyun3 @dimplewonie @yjjungwon @flwrshee

@kflixnet

SERIES TAGLIST ▸ @lwavander @eloelooo @heatrache @harufluff @kjrcrz @kpopstanmeg @luvkpopp @yunicide @nunugget @kyanmeai @enhastolemyheart @j-wyoung @yinviyang @enhawinnieee @suvgs @zhounauts @123-678h @rshmra @they2luv1naia @hoodiebangtan @bachiwrld @lprww @riskiriki @minhosprettywife @fakeuwus @yumilovesloona @microwvdstrawb3rri3s @k25vi

[pillow-anime-talk]

love song.

request: can you write a hc of rin, ikuya, asahi, kisumi, and natsuya reacting to their song writer s/o wrote them a love song? i believe that rin is such a sucker for this cheesy kind of things 🥺🥺

# tags: headcanons; current relationships; singer!reader; musical instruments; love songs; soft romance; fluff; kisses & hugs; sfw

includes: gender neutral reader ft. ikuya kirishima, kisumi shigino, rin matsuoka, asahi shiina & natsuya kirishima {free!}

author’s note: sorry for waiting so long! thank youuuu so much!

— IKUYA

↘ PDA or cheesy things are not close to Ikyua, so when he hears a song dedicated only to him, he will be surprised and slightly touched at the same time. He has always liked your voice, so a song sung by you and for him will be the best gift (for no occasion or for a specific occasion).

↘ If he’s also had a bad time or day due to work, school or a failed swimming race, your precious song will really help him relax and get rid of unnecessary, weird thoughts. It’s amazing how music can heal a person so quickly.

↘ If you both lie in bed together and you sing to him, he will surely snuggle into your belly and fall asleep after a while.

↘ After some time, he’ll surely thank you with a tender kiss on the forehead or cheek with a shy smile on his face and go back to nap.

— KISUMI

↘ Kisumi is the definition of the biggest fan and also supporter. He loves everything you create; from the lyrics, through the music or playing the guitar/piano/etc. He loves listening to your voice and watching you concentrate on reading notes, writing a new song or recording something on Soundcloud.

↘ He often helps you out and suggests new things to create or encourages you to do a cover of one of his favorite songs (I think he’s a Bebe Rexha fan, lol). Kisumi also loves to make you small gifts such as new guitar picks, a new writing pen or paper on which you can write and create songs.

↘ So when you write and present him your new love song that will be only for him, he’ll be really happy! And also be indescribably grateful to you.

↘ Will definitely brag to all his friends about this situation!

— RIN

↘ Rin knows that music is as important to you as swimming is to him, and you both support each other in your passions and enjoy each other’s achievements and awards together. If your boyfriend wins the race, you’re the biggest ball of joy in the world, and if you win a music competition or write a new song, Rin will suggest romantic dinner at your favorite restaurant or a lazy evening with a glass of your favorite drink (e.g. wine, lemonade or fruit juice).

↘ Nobody would expect it, but Rin is a really sensitive guy, so when you dedicate a song to him one day, which you also wrote yourself... He will be really touched.

↘ If you’re home alone, he’ll give you sweet kisses all over your face and act like a lovestruck teenager.

↘ “I love you so much, Y/N.” He would talk all the time, grinning from ear to ear and holding a paper with the lyrics of the song written on it against his chest (I’m sure this paper will be his talisman and he’ll put it in his wallet).

— ASAHI 

↘ He behaves even worse than Kisumi. He literally keeps asking you what the notes mean, when you’re going to sing a song for him again or when you’re finally going to be famous. Poor kid doesn’t know it’s not that simple...

↘ Asahi loves you very much and always supports your creativity; whether you’re writing songs for yourself or taking part in competitions – he’s always cheering you on and if the situation calls for it, he makes good food for you and holds a banner with your first name and some big hearts on it.

↘ If you add songs on Soundcloud, Spotify or Youtube, be sure that your boyfriend will take care of promoting them to friends and strangers. He is like a manager.

↘ That’s why you probably know how Asahi will react when you write and sing a love song for him, right? The world will explode with his scream and a deluge of tears!

— NATSUYA

↘ Unlike others, I don’t think Natsuya is a music fan. He probably likes some old anime openings, but he doesn’t like music in general; he doesn’t know the difference between rap and trap, he doesn’t like pop, he definitely knows nothing about classical music and I don’t think he likes country and funky music either.

↘ But YOUR music is different. He always compares your songs to amber found on the beach, and other artists to ordinary broken shells on the sand. Sometimes you don’t understand his approach, but you know what he means and you appreciate it.

↘ If you ever write and sing a song for him, I’m sure he won’t understand the lyrics the first time. Only when you explain to him how much this song means to you will he smile and thank you.

↘ Then he’ll say some stupid line like “Sing it at our wedding” and you’ll roll your eyes in embarrassment.

[fairydares]

Gruvia Fan Content Prompt Idea List

well, some people seemed interested when i said i'd make a post with a list of Gruvia fan content prompts, so I'm making it! I'll warn you, though: I don't really like the way ideas are shared on typical prompt lists so mine might not be to you guys' tastes:

AU where Juvia joined Fairy Tail first and was the one to inspire Gray to join the guild. Some of you might recognize this as a previous post of mine, where the idea is more fleshed out, but I don't mind at all if anyone else takes it as a prompt and uses the idea to write their own story.

Gruvia-centric Stone Age Omake fic. There's tons for Nalu but only one I found that's Gruvia, Learning to Love by starryfairyjedi, which is excellent but the author hasn't finished it quite yet.

Pregnancy fic. ik ik, another unoriginal idea. There are tons of these, but I think that's true for a reason. A scenario where Juvia accidentally gets pregnant forces Gray to commit in a way he avoids throughout the series. Plus also that guy just has a ton of untapped worry-wort dad potential. It's tragic, really.

Forced to live together. Who doesn't love these kinds of fics? As for why Gray and Juvia have to live together...maybe Fairy Hills got destroyed during Alvarez or by another Dark Guild, and when Gajeel offered to let Juvia stay with him, Gray stepped in to offer up his own place in a moment of irrational jealousy. There's a lot of potential for humor with Juvia's various Gray paraphernalia, plus it would be a chance for them to address feelings about their previous cohabitation.

Playing off the last one: AU where Juvia's an informant targeted by the mafia and Gray is the FBI agent tasked with protecting her. Therefore, they are forced to live together in a safe house.

Grease-esque AU. Juvia could be one of those rollerskating waitresses and Gray and Natsu could be race car drivers/rivals. Sides of other pairings would work well with this one, like if Lucy and Erza were also waitresses.

Juvia meets Edo-Greige somehow. This would be so cute! How would she wind up meeting him? Well...i don't know, lol. It'd be interesting if she wound up in Edolas accidentally and Gray had to go rescue her. In the meantime, she could interact with Edo Gray and Juvia, also...that's a moment we never really got to see in the series.

Juvia and Lyon wind up paired for a mission and Gray follows them out of jealousy.

Assassin AU where Gray's the assassin and Juvia's the target. Good potential for a steamy fight scene and ultimate cuteness when Gray refuses to kill her.

Pirate and Mermaid AU. a lot of fics have elements of this dynamic but i don't think i've seen one that's really Gruvia-centric and about the love story. would make a great oneshot or short multichapter fic imo.

Juvia's a nymph who cares all alone for her forest since the other nymphs died, until one day, an Ice Demon Slayer, injured in battle, drifts into her forest via river on a slab of wood. The forest urges her to kill him, but Juvia is unable to kill the first man she's ever seen. While she nurses him back to health, they fall in love. Lots of potential for romance/humor with the whole "Juvia's never been around people, especially men, and doesn't get personal space" thing, a bit like the Stone Age Omake idea.

MHA/BNHA AU where they meet as heroes-in-training or young pro heroes in the field.

Fake Dating. Kind of a sucker for these, ngl. Would be even better (in my personal opinion) if it was an AU so this was how they met.

UFC/MMA AU. Few different potential ideas with this one. Could be Juvia falling in love with Gray from the audience while he fights Natsu, a mixed-gender version of the UFC where Gray and Juvia fight each other, or Gray gets a crush from the audience watching Juvia fight someone (I'd personally love to read this one).

Gray and Juvia meet as kids. Would be really cute if little Gray comforted Juvia about her rain.

Robin Hood AU. The Fairy Tail ethos goes well with Robin Hood's. You could have it where Juvia serves as a knight for King John (/Jose?) but abandons the kingdom for Robin Hood's cause when she meets Gray.

If I think of more, I'll add to this list or maybe make another one! Feel free to use any of these/apply them to any ship. I'd love if you lmk you used one of them or tagged me or whatever, but if you're not comfortable with that you don't have to. I may use my own prompts one day, too, especially the Stone Age Omake ones, the nymph one, and the Edo Greige one. I'm totally fine with us having written the same idea if you are.

See also this set of romantic prompt lists. Actually, just see their master post of prompts, literally my favorite blog for this sort of thing.

[autobot-ratchet]

MTMTE 12-13

MTMTE 12

still so cute that Tailgate's happy place is movie night

damn they really just cut right to the aftermath of the battle like “oh yeah btw Rewind's injured and Swerve got his face blown off. Just to let you know. Okay back to the present”

Drift is in his element, look at that smile, you go baby, slice those dudes up

gfdjks poor First Aid is so done with Chromedome's fussing, give the guy a break he's just worried about his husband

also yeah god this is the first time we get to say explicitly that they're married, isn't it? I remember being completely fucking floored by that the first time I read it, like “wait what do you mEAN THEY'RE ACTUALLY TOGETHER??? LIKE IN THE ROMANCE WAY?!?!?” like I had picked up on the queercoding vibes but then the comic was just like “yeah coding-schmoding, they're queer” and I simply could not believe that shit lmAO

also btw Cyclonus is injured too. Just fyi

I've made fun of Tailgate for embellishing his past accomplishments but damn does he do a good job of stringing Rewind along lmAO kid's a pretty good liar under enough pressure

I love how they show us that horrifying panel of Swerve's fucked up face without context and then later the context turns out to be “yeah he just accidentally shot himself in the face.” he looked down the fuckin barrel of the thing god lmAO

I love the concept of innermost energon so much. For a race that's constantly morphing and changing to give away the one part of themselves that always stays the same no matter what, the fuckin romance of it all

I love Tailgate trying to gas up Chromedome by constantly trash-talking Dominus just on principle alone lmAO “Oh that's Rewind's ex? Fuck that guy he's got nothing on you” “Tailgate he was an incredible person” “Incredibly cringe, maybe”

sorry I am now distracted by the idea of Tailgate using the word “cringe,” that wasn't nearly as much of a thing when this comic was coming out but he absolutely would, holy shit

ooohhhgdjhfs Drift recruiting Chromedome for The Overlord Thing while he's at his lowest and Rewind's incapacitated is so slimy, he really does have to do all the dirty work for this project huh

Cyclonus immediately goes back to help Tailgate clean up, he's making progress, we're getting thereeeeeeeee

I think this is the first time (of many) that Cyclonus looks at Chromedome and Rewind's relationship and is like “...........huh.” Like, he definitely uses them as a framework for his own relationship with Tailgate and wants what they have, even if he doesn't quite realize it at this point

Ah, right, I forgot that Whirl helps Rewind jump his spark out of guilt for nearly killing him alongside Cyclonus lmAO

And Cyclonus protected Rewind.... nnnnNNGFHSDFNgsdf *points at Cyclonus* HAHA YOU HAVE FEELINGS... YOU CARE........

MTMTE 13

I like the implication that this isn't the first time Drift has grabbed Swerve like a football

also love Cyclonus calling Drift too young, both of you are old as dicks

I will never be able to think about the bit where Swerve asks Drift to be his roommate and Drift is like “no thanks, in my off time I prefer to be alone in a state of heightened isolation exploring the limits of solitude” without thinking about that vine that's like “sorry dude I can't go do social event, I'm busy” and then it cuts to him in his room alone, drinking a can of beer with one hand and playing jock jams on a keyboard with the other, this one, this is the vine

I fucking forgot Swerve was still here, I thought they closed the door on him lmfAO they really just had that whole conversation with the door wide open

I'm still so sad we only got the good holomatter avatar generator after Ratchet had used his old one, not to mention everyone whose avatars we never saw. Every day I wonder what Drift's avatar would've looked like

Magnus shoving his way between Swerve and Tailgate, making Tailgate scoot three entire seats over

“I think the program is struggling with human gender- Do I look like a 'Mary Sue?'” ah-HAH *slaps knee*

Aww, I forgot Magnus's avatar is Verity, that's so sweet. I didn't know who Verity was the first time I read this, but now that I do it does hit different lmAO

fuckin rip Magnus. Fhdksjkl I just noticed Rewind recording in the background, you can see the light of his camera on his silhouette

“Why do I get the impression that you can't remember your worst enemy?” nnnnnnNNNNNGGHH

drunk Magnus is cute

“Where IS Chromedome?” “Oh, he's, erm... I'm sure he told me...” NNNNNNNGGHHFFGHGHFGH

“Savor this feeling, everyone. You never know what's around the corner.” yEAH, YOU GUYS SURE DONT...

Cyclonus teaching Tailgate to sing in old Cybertronian... Tailgate said earlier in the issue that Cyclonus was the only link to his past and that was defs on purpose so that this could be Cyclonus's moment of realizing that Tailgate is much the same for him

aww Swerve, buddy... I mean to be fair I would've done the same thing in Blurr's position, Swerve comes on a little strong, but oh man. Swerve's not a bad guy, he's just unbearably lonely but Blurr never could've known that

oh right this is the first little written blurb we get hell yeah

Rung quietly marveling at the miracle of Cybertronian physiology like. That's YOU!!! That's more you than you could ever know!!!!! He doesn't even know that he's the originator of all that!!!!!!!!

it is still so funny that Rung regained the ability to move by getting so sick of Swerve's shit that he subconsciously mustered the power to move his arm so he could shush him

mmmmphphgndfm one of the only things Rung remembers during his recovery period was the smile Skids gave him when he corrected the mispronunciation of his name... SKIDS IS REAL SWEET........

gfdjk the gang watching Cyclonus browse a gift shop like they're ethologists and Cyclonus is a species of animal they've never seen before

godjdfska Magnus trying to make a joke and failing harder than anyone ever could is still so funny.. HE'S TRYING OKAY........ Also, absolutely hysterical joke to be telling to Rung specifically

God Rodimus is such an ass lmAO “What is wrong with people” he asks the therapist, genuinely. Simply solve mental illness, why don't you

ooh, get him, Rung, stick to your guns, attaboy

God. Watching Rodimus lie through his teeth about investigating the voice Rung and Red Alert heard... I mean, it was never going to work out, bringing Overlord onto the ship, it was a doomed endeavor from the start, but seeing all these moments of Drift and Rodimus trying to keep it under wraps is just so bitter lmAO They did their best, their awful, awful best

[nat-seal-well]

Meet Marin, my one and only (and very beloved) Detective OC :)

(made with this picrew)

Marin Rose Lin

N-mancer (usually Nat, sometimes Nate—depends on the fic)

NB, AFAB. They/them

Tan skin, dark brown eyes, glasses, and wild, curly brown hair. They gave up hopes of taming it years ago and now it just does whatever it wants

5’4” and insists that they aren’t short, they’re average, thank you very much

Plus-size. They’re soft and round. It makes them a good pillow and they’re proud of it :)

Mixed-race, half Asian

Big fan of turtleneck sweaters, to hide the scar on their neck from where Murphy bit them

No combat abilities! Can’t fight to save their life. It doesn’t stop them from trying, much to N’s distress

Good with teamwork on the job, but fiercely independent outside of that

(It can be a flaw)

It started when they were a child, and had to raise themself because Rebecca was never around. They didn’t need anyone making decisions for them growing up, they don’t need anyone now. They can look after themself

(At least, that’s what they think)

Very poor relationship with Rebecca. Unless it’s job-related, they don’t want much to do with her

A little impulsive, more likely to go with gut instincts. Usually it ties in to their attempts to help in fights (and failing). N is going to have a heart attack

Speaking of which, they appreciate how much N cares, but the overprotectiveness is an ongoing issue

Bobby is an ex. They’re cordial with her, though. Most of the time

Has a cozy apartment (and room at the warehouse). Both are full of books and trinkets

Wears a ring on the middle finger of their left hand. It’s silver, a serpent biting its tail. They bought it in high school with part of their first paycheck and play with it when they need to keep their hands busy

Marin didn’t want to go into law enforcement, but it seemed like a quiet job. Employment opportunities are usually limited in small towns

They understand why the Agency works the way it does, but that doesn’t mean they like it

They have a weakness for the berry danishes at Haley’s bakery

Not a fan of coffee or tea, but they like energy drinks. The rest of UB doesn’t like that they like energy drinks

Besties with F :)

They love their little beat-up silver car. It has been affectionately named Megatron and they have one of those 3D Decepticon decals on it

F: Isn’t he like, the bad guy?

Marin: How dare you. He’s good now, he writes poetry

A, UB’s car guy™️ (gender-neutral) keeps trying to talk them into buying a vehicle that isn’t a death trap

Marin refuses

They won’t admit it, but M intimidates them. Marin also sees them as a challenge—they will be M’s friend

…Somehow.

Fun fact: Marin reads a lot of “paranormal romance” (monsterfucking) books. They’ll take that secret with them to the grave

(F already found the collection hidden under their bed)

[disgracefulthings]

I gotta rant a bit about Loki

I have not seen season 2 of his show, but season one killed my love for MCU Loki

Let's start with the movies. The first two Thor movies are usually regarded as some of the worst MCU films (especially the second), but what I like about them is at least Loki has a consistent character arc throughout them (along with the first Avengers film). Loki learns that he's a part of a race that is treated like monsters on Asgard, and this destroys him. He tries to off himself at the end of the first Thor movie, only to end in the hands of Thanos. He went through so much shit throughout all three of these movies, and Thor 2 ends with him on Asgard's throne, leaving the audience wondering what he will do now he got what he thought he wanted.

Then Thor 3 happened. Look, I like Taika Waititi, and Thor 3 is an enjoyable film, but it destroyed Loki's character arc. He's just a silly guy now. Why does he try to backstab Thor? Because he's silly, no other reason. Plus, after Odin has lied to Loki for his entire life, he tells him that he loves him and magically all that trauma about him being a frost giant is gone! In fact, I think the MCU has forgotten that Loki is a frost giant at all! (Shut up, I know about What If). Ok, but what about the next movie. Thanos has finally come and now Loki can confront the person that gave him the mind stone to take over Earth- and Loki's dead.

I really don't like how they killed Loki. Loki is not a character you kill off to show how dangerous this villain will be. Mostly because the movies had forgotten to finish his character arc, but I guess everyone had forgotten he had one at this point.

Did anyone cry when he died? I sure as hell didn't, and I'm a crybaby when it comes to my faves dying. I was more shocked, and I convinced myself that this was another fake out. Honestly it may seem like cope with all these fans believing that he is still alive, but he has faked his death before, and nobody wanted to believe that his story will end in a dumb way that felt like the writers not believing that he mattered as a character.

But he did, and now we have season 1 of Loki. I honestly thought the writers realized how loved Loki is and they would finally finish his character arc. I mean, the show takes place after Avengers 1, and that's when Loki still hated himself for being a frost giant.

But no, Loki is silly again. Thor 3 has really ruined Loki. I understand that the first 2 Thor movies weren't as beloved, but I loved all the Loki scenes. There's a reason why his character became so popular despite the movies not.

Anyway, the first season of Loki isn't all bad. I love that it gave Loki a friend, and Mobius plays off him really well. And... yeah, I think that's all I like about it.

Now on to everything else. To start off, I really don't like Sylvie x Loki. Not only does it give me incestuous vibes, I really don't think Loki should have a love interest at this point (I don't ship Mobius x Loki too because of this point, but I will admit they have way more chemistry than Sylvie x Loki). But as I said, the writers didn't care about his character arc and so they forced a romance they had no time to build up, leaving me confused on why they had them fall in love in one episode, and ohh boy, the episode is super fucking dumb.

They established that you can do anything in an apocalypse situation and there would be no anomalies detected, SO WHY DOES LOKI AND SYLVIE FALLING IN LOVE CAUSE AN ANOMALY??? Because the plot said so, I love lazy writing in the show with my favorite character!!

God, and there's the queer baiting. Now, I can excuse the train scene because daddy Disney can't have shows say the word bi, but the scene where Loki asks the other Lokis if they ever seen another female Loki, and they say no???? WTF!?!? Is Loki gender fluid or not! Also, this is a stupid ass line that didn't need to be in the show? There are an infinite amount of universes, but only 1 female Loki who got caught by the TVA?? That doesn't make sense!

I'm done with Loki and I'm done with the MCU. The only good MCU show I've seen was WandaVision, and they still botched the ending and had a horrible follow up movie.

I heard Loki season 2 was better, but I still don't know why I should even bother

[notquitecanon]

Do you do scenarios or headcanons? If so, how many characters can we request for scenarios or headcanons? Would you do the same prompt with different characters? Can we request for male reader, female reader, gender neutral reader, etc? Other than Astarion, are there any characters from Baldur's Gate 3 you would write? Are there any topics you won't do like rape, suicide, etc? Do you do poly ships x reader? Would you mind if we request for Alternate Universes or Aus like AU where the character lives happily? Would you mind if the request is suggestive, implied sex, or mentioned sex but no explicit sex? Would you do NSFW requests? For Baldur's Gate 3 requests, would you mind if we don't specify the race/class to leave it ambiguous or if we ask specify the race/class like human/healer? What kinks would you accept for requests? Thank you in advance!

Honestly, I’ve just never had those kind of requests on here. I also am very bad about answering requests bc my brain is a goblin with a pencil who is very picky about what sparks my interest enough to push past the usual fog of writers block. But funny enough I used to run a Star Wars fanfic blog so I do have answers to these questions:

1.) I’m not opposed to doing scenarios/ head canons! Sometimes doing them is what sparks a full fic or it’s just fun to slow down and enjoy imagining things!

As for how many, to prevent burn out I’ll probs stick to 2 or 3 characters at a time. If someone requests more than 3, I’d probs pick the 3 that I had the better ideas for / knew the characters better

2.) Requesting different gendered readers. Full transparency, I’m a cisgender woman.

I feel most knowledgeable writing feminine presenting characters, as I can use my own experiences! That being said, I do write things to be gender neutral and can do that on request. As for writing for a male reader, I’m open to trying! It’s not in my realm of experience nor have I done it before, but if I got the right request, I’d be happy to try! (I just don’t want to not write to my usual standards and I especially don’t want to offend anyone because of my lack of knowledge!)

3.) I’ll write for any of the romanceable characters, except Minthara (haven’t been able to recruit her yet so I don’t know her)

I’m more likely to write for characters that I’m most attracted to such as Astarion, Halsin, Karlach, Gale, and Lae’zel.

4.) I won’t write graphic depictions of rape or suicidal. I will use mentions of trauma / mental health struggles in my writing, and I always mention them in my TW section. Not so much a problem in this phantom, but I also don’t write incest. Or inappropriate age gaps.

5.) I have never written a polyamorous relationship, but I’d be open to trying with the right prompt/request. I have a lot of love to go around, so I think I can do this.

6.)  when it comes to AU’s I mostly try to keep it in universe, and I will do what I call fix it fics. That way if the work I am trying to do takes place after the end of game, I can still have all my little guys because I refuse to believe that there’s not a happy ending for everybody. And if there isn’t one, I will create one. But I don’t really do coffee shop they use or flower shop use or anything that takes them out of the world that they are in.

7.) at the moment, I don’t write outright smut. It’s not because I don’t want to or can’t, I just don’t think I’m very good at it. I will use mentions of sex, heavy-handed, make out sessions, and honestly pretty much everything right up until the point of actual sex. So you request smut, but I might not be as quick to answer those others. Personally, I find the tension leading up to this smut the fun part to write and read.

8.) as for race/class of BG3 readers, I will try to keep it, usually fairly and ambiguous. Though, how I have written everything that I have written, even though I’ve only posted one thing, I, based all of my writing off how I played the game personally. So, if you have something specific in mind, you’ll have to specify in the request, or I will default to what I usually do. (Reference I love playing Rangers. They are my favorite, so I have knowledge of nature, survival and some medicinal skills) 

9.) as for kinks, I accept, I will accept anything in the ask box, even if I don’t write it. no kink shaming here as long as the kinks don’t fall under any of the things that I don’t write, which are listed in the above points

Thank you for asking, and being so respectful about my writing! I really appreciate it and hope that you request something :) 

Disclaimer, I hope everything that is written in this makes sense, I’m using voice to text as I do something else.

[rainbowxocs]

TW: Cults, Child Neglect.

Name: Atsu Kaigan (圧開眼)

Cult Title: “Servant of the Gods”. (神のしもべ)

Username: elementofmagic

Nicknames: Atsu-Chan (圧-ちゃん), Yuru-chara (ゆるキャラ).

Age: 22.

Pronouns: He/Him (In English)

I Pronoun: Watashi (私) (A neutral I pronoun, usually seen as formal.)

(Will sometimes switch pronouns when dissociating.)

Sexuality: Straight.

Gender: GNC, Guy.

Species: Human.

Disorders: Separation Anxiety, ADHD, CPTSD, Autism, OSDD 1b, Maladaptive Daydreaming, Depression, DPD.

OSDD Information: Atsu’s OSDD is mostly fragmented dissociation, He does not have any fully formed alters that have separate identities from him. His OSDD tends to manifest in certain emotions or memories which causes him to not fully understand where he is or who he is.

Recovering Addictions: Hoarding.

Religion: None.

Job: Fashion Designer, Public Relations for Suka’s Sukeban.

Major: Fashion.

Lives in: Okutama, Japan, 2024.

Languages: Japanese, JSL.

Height: 5’4”

Race: Asian.

Ethnicity: Japanese.

Accent: Shitamashi. (Will sometimes switch accents when dissociating.)

Weapons: Pastel Purple Bat with ribbons and glitter, Purple sparkley pistol, Purple Brass knuckles shaped like a cat.

Alignment: Neutral.

Text Color: Purple.

Main Animal: Horse.

Main Hobbies: Sewing, Plushie Making, and Collecting MLP Merchandise.

Diet: Vegetarian.

Favorite Drink: Apple Cider.

Favorite Fruit: Star Grapes.

Favorite Meal: Daisy, Dandelion, and Pansy Sandwich, Spring Rolls, Jelly Noodles, Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches.

Favorite Candy: Lollipops, Bubblegum, Rock Candy.

Favorite Dessert: Mizu Manju, Oiri Candy Icecream, Rolled BlueberryIcecream.

Favorite Flower: Lilacs.

Scent: Twilight Sparkle Perfume.

Handedness: Right.

Blood Color: Red.

Awareness: Not Aware (Effect: None.)

Birthday: June 4th 2002 (Gemini, Horse, A, Loyalty.)

Theme:

Playlist:

Fun Facts: Has basically every J-Fashion imaginable in his closet.

Special Interests: MLP, J-Fashion.

Stims: My Little Pony Stim Toys. Fabric Stims.

Stimboard: LINK

Moodboard: LINK

Fashionboard: LINK

Comfort Objects: His Set of MLP Plushies, His Takara MLP figures, His fashion dolls, Unicornos.

Extras: He has those super rare MLP figures that were only released in Japan.

Family: Kida Asahara, Yukimori Asahara (Birth Parents)

Mura Asahara, Akane Asahara. (Aunt and Uncle)

Uru Nanamo, Hwan Asahara, Keh Spo. (Cousins.)

Friends: Uru (BFF), Kagayaki, Hana, Ryu, Boru, Otoko.

Romance: Suka Ringu (Girlfriend)

Enemies: A good chunk of the gangs in the area, The Cult.

Pet: Twilight Sparkle (トワイライトスパークル) (Sugar Glider)

Brief Personality: Atsu has a very bubbly personality, you wouldn’t really tell he is apart of a gang by the way he speaks, He’s kinda goofy, he has a tendency to tell other gang leaders about the lore of my little pony while in the middle of territory disputes. He loves hanging out with his friends and fashion and He generally tries to have a positive outlook on life.

Brief Backstory:

Atsu was born into a religious cult, he wasn’t quite sure who his birth parents were, he would be switched around from couple to couple depending on who took care of him.

He was very neglected in the cult, he didn’t have really any set of parents, just adults that would come in and out and occasionally take care of the bare essentials. He was severely neglected, nobody really taught him basic things like the alphabet or how to read for a very long time.

However. He had one friend in the cult, “The Prince”, aka the Leaders son, Uru, him and Uru got along really well, always playing together and Atsu felt very safe with Uru. He tended to follow him around wherever Uru went, which they both enjoyed. It was nice for both of them to have a break from the cult in a way.

Eventually the leaders got arrested and Atsu was sent into foster care, he didn’t really have any guardians who tried to understand him though. As a kid he had a tendency to daydream about far off lands often times not being able to get out of bed.

When he got to high school, He met his childhood friend again, they both were kinda in the same place mentally. Both shy socially awkward kids with little to no friends. They really relied on eachother. And that caused both of them to blossom into their own people.

Atsu later met his girlfriend Suka, and eventually started to become a fashion designer after finding his love for J-Fashion and also sewing plushies.

[maddie-grove]

Little Book Review: Just Like You

Author: Nick Hornby.

Publication Date: 2020.

Genre: General fiction.

Premise: In 2016 London, Lucy, a white forty-something divorced teacher with two young kids, strikes up an unexpected romance with Joseph, a twenty-something black man juggling various childcare/coaching/retail jobs with his songwriting/DJ ambitions. Also, the Brexit vote is happening.

Thoughts: Nick Hornby was one of the first non-YA authors I regularly read as a kid; maybe he was the very first whose books weren’t assigned for school and/or pilfered from my mom’s collection. His novels were ideal for a girl who loved romantic comedies, had a decent working knowledge of pop music history, and enjoyed chick lit at the more down-to-earth end of the scale (more Jennifer Weiner than Plum Sykes). In fact, his novels were basically chick lit, regardless of the gender of his protagonists. They were funny, relatively light-hearted stories of contemporary life, written in a conversational style, and if they sometimes strayed into heavy territory, so did the works of Jennifer Weiner and Lolly Winston and Anna Maxted.

Now chick lit has fallen out of favor as a term, and those kinds of stories seem to live on primarily in the type of contemporary romance novel that comes with Corporate Memphis cover art. As a fan of historical romance and a once-avid reader of chick lit, I have not found this trend particularly enjoyable, although I fully admit I haven’t given the genre much of a chance. Just Like You has a Corporate Memphis-ish cover, and from the Goodreads reviews it seems like it captured a decent percentage of today’s contemporary romance market. This was probably good for sales, but only to a point, because on the whole these readers seem disappointed. It’s not really that kind of book. Oh, it meets the formal requirements: it’s focused on a romance, and the couple ends it happy and together. It’s just not presented as a given that the reader should want the romance to come about, which is something that a reader generally does look for in a romance. I personally came away thinking that Joseph and Lucy’s relationship was a positive thing for both of them; however, the narrative invites a lot of questions about whether and why they should get together. This isn’t better or worse than what most romance novels do, but it is different.

So, is it good? I actually really liked the romance parts. The initial flirtation between them is especially well-done, light and funny and sexy. I also enjoyed the exploration of the shortcuts people use to make political decisions. Joseph, a curious and open-minded young man, has people with various strong opinions (idealistic, pragmatic, xenophobic, etc.) about the Brexit vote in his life, but very few of them can explain the ramifications. Even Lucy, strongly Remain, admits that she initially made up her mind because the Leave people seemed like assholes. She’s not wrong, but she’s not especially well-informed. The exploration of race and class, in contrast, is a little rote. Nick Hornby is neither black nor a woman, and it feels like he’s playing it safe.

Hot Goodreads Take: “In Joseph and Lucy he has created two characters that are as unlikable, as stupid, as worthless, as unambitious as any two characters you could ever think to encounter,” opines one reviewer, who makes liberal use of “Woke” as a pejorative. Surely he has encountered characters less ambitious, at least? One time I heard of a movie where a guy doesn’t leave his couch even to go to the bathroom.

[in-my-feels-probably]

hi! could i have option two please? a romantic matchup with any of the teen characters from stranger things (male or female) since i’m 18? x

firstly, i use she/her pronouns. i am 5’2, have brown hair that reaches to my chest, hazel eyes, pale skin and a pear shaped, average physique. i also have a stoma bag on the right side of my stomach and a scar going from the middle of my stomach to the bottom. i usually wear a pair of hoop earrings, two/three rings across both hands and black painted nails. i either wear no make-up when i’m at home or light make-up (eyebrows, mascara, concealer) when i go out. i usually wear my hair down or in a ponytail and my style ranges from sweatpants and a sweater to anything chic, but recently i’ve been loving skirts in particular :)

some of my favourite things include fantasy/romance books, action and mystery movies (knives out and back to the future are my favourites of all time), new york city and any songs by fleetwood mac or queen.

i’m quite nerdy, so i love marvel movies and tv shows such as supernatural and the boys. i’m the type of person to create character arcs and future plot points as theories and nerd out about them to my friends. i’m autistic as well, so i infodump stuff like this to my friends quite a lot. linking to my autism again, i’m very shy, but i open up once i get closer to you (i kinda don’t stop talking once i’m comfortable around you). i have quite a positive outlook on life, i don’t like other people bullying others for their interests or things out of their control (sexuality, race, gender etc). i’m told i’m quite organised and determined, as well as a good friend who people can trust.

other hobbies i have are editing, playing guitar, singing (especially theatre) and chatting with friends. i also like to defend and fight for equal rights and justice across all subjects, primarily doing this through social media.

okay, that should be everything, thank you for doing this !

hi! thank you for participating :)

i ship you with jonathan!

in high school, he would think you’re so pretty. it would take him a while to build up the courage to talk to you, but once he finally did, you’d immediately click. you’d have so much in common. id consider him to be pretty nerdy, and he would absolutely love talking about movie franchises or comic books or anything else that you’re into. he would think you’re adorable, ranting about all your favorite things and theories to him, listening to you with a little smile on his face. i’m not sure if he would listen to fleetwood mac or queen on his own, but you’d definitely hook him on them, and he’d end up buying their records and tapes. and in return, he’d make you mixtapes, or have you listen to some of his favorite music when you hung out. once you got really close, he’d know he could tell you anything. you’d mutually trust each other with anything. jonathan got harassed a decent amount in high school, even a little still after. he’d know that you absolutely hate that, and would be there to comfort him whenever he needed it. you’d have to remind him how good of a guy you think he is, and that it doesn’t matter what any asshole says about him because it’s not true. he would have lucked out with you, knowing that you didn’t give a shit about what anyone else said. you’d always be there to support him, and will too. will would really like you, joining in on hanging out with you sometimes.

after jonathan showed will the clash, he’d be sucked in immediately. maybe one day, you’d surprise them both by learning on of their favorite songs. you’d bring over your guitar, playing it for them. it would become a routine. jonathan would call, asking you to come over, sounding a little upset. you’d know that either him or will had a rough day, and needed some cheering up. so you’d bring your guitar, letting yourself in and plopping down on the couch. they’d come out of their rooms when they hear you, coming into the living room.

jonathan would smile at the sight of you, with your guitar in your lap. “you brought your guitar.”

“i did,” you’d say, motioning for them to sit down. “any requests?”

“you’re the best. you make it so easy to love you.” jonathan would say.

“ew. get a room,” will would joke, fake gagging. “but he’s right, you really are.”

you’d fight off a blush, shaking your head. “hush, stop it. seriously though, sit down and give me a song. i learned some new ones.”

[group20gwss]

Season 1, Episode 1

In this episode, the narrative follows Georgia and her two kids Ginny and Austin who have just moved from Texas to a small town in Wellsbury, Massachusetts, seeking a fresh start due to Georgia’s husband dying from a car accident. The two main characters in the show are Ginny, a 15-year-old biracial girl who doesn’t like her nomadic lifestyle due to her mother's choices, and  Georgia who is a young mom that got pregnant at the age of 15 and has faced challenges in the past ranging from abuse and a strained relationship with her mother. This is one of the key reasons why Georgia tries so hard to make sure her kids have a stable lifestyle which you see throughout the episode.

The episode explores race through the lens of Ginny’s experience as a biracial girl. An important scene occurs at a gas station where a police officer gives Ginny suspicious looks until he sees Georgia who is a white woman coming out of the store with snacks to give to Ginny. After Ginny had gotten her snacks the police officer looked away and then Ginny began to reflect on the fact that leaving the South doesn't mean escaping racism. In the episode, you could also see Ginny express a dislike for her mother not understanding how life is different for her as a biracial girl living in the United States of America.

Gender plays a huge role with the main two characters being presumably female. During the episode, it was mostly just women talking and the only time I feel like men got the opportunity to talk is when there was romance being involved, or if the guy was just a part of the main character's storyline.

There was some concern as I was watching this episode because it relied on a lot of stereotypes specifically when they mentioned that the only thing men want is sex and that men believe women should give them sex when asked which isn’t true about all men. Sexuality was a prominent theme throughout this episode, particularly for Ginny who was seen exploring different relationships with two guys by the names of Marcus and Hunter.

The episode touched on a few political things specifically the concerns of the lack of diversity in Ginny’s AP class books which only featured white male authors. She worries about internalizing ideologies that may silence her voice as a black woman, particularly when the only book by a black author is likely to be assigned during Black History Month. In summary, this episode touches on different subjects of societal issues, race, gender, and sexuality while also emphasizing political issues in education.

[seedsinmygarden]

Thomas Dharby, the Gamer

“Yeah, Brattleby, give me any game, I’ll fuck you up!”

no images yet…

Basic Information

Identifying Gender/Species: Cisgender Human Male, he/him pronouns.

Birthdate: April 9th, 1875 (Aries)

Blood Status: Pureblood

Wand: Natural design, Honey Brown color. Dogwood wood, unicorn hair core, 12.5”, fairly bendy flexibility.

Pets?: None.

Appearance

Height and Body Type: Short. A measly little 5’7 (170 cm) right now, and he doesn’t think he’ll grow much taller than 5’10 (178 cm) by the end of Hogwarts. Has a bit of muscle to make up for it thanks to Quidditch, but still kind of lanky with a rectangle body type.

Hair: Short blond hair, very curly. He does not take care of it at all, just runs his hands through it to keep it from getting too tangled.

Eyes: Hazel eyes, closer to dark green like the leaves of the Forbidden Forest. No glasses, he doesn’t need them.

Scars and Other Marks: Some freckles, not a crazy amount, and white skin. Not tan or pale, he’s just white.

Clothing: One major staple is his Quidditch sweater or jacket. If he’s off to Hogsmeade, he’ll throw on the Quidditch robe. Every other day, it’s the sweater with his number on it. On the particularly warm days, however, he’ll shed it and just have his white buttonup with the Hufflepuff house tie. In the winter, Quidditch robe with a scarf. Often forgets gloves— it’s a wonder he hasn’t lost his fingers to frostbite yet.

Personality

Not necessarily popular in a well-loved way like Leon is, but more so “This kid is annoying.” Some people say that positiviely, others say it negatively.

Very hyper. Very loud. Oh Merlin, he’s LOUD. And talkative. He will go on and on FOREVER about any topic that slightly intrigues him— which is a little bit of everything! He loves talking.

A little inattentive at times. His thoughts will drift, he genuinely doesn’t mean to be rude if someone is talking to him! He just has a pretty short attention span.

Home Life

Birthplace: Feldcroft

Birth Parents: Jackson and Annabelle Dharby

Adopted?: Nope!

Adoptive Parents: N/A

Siblings?: One twin sister; Taylor Dharby

Other Guardian Figures: Johnathan Dharby (Jack’s father and Tommy’s grandfather, often called Grandpa Johnny)

Places of Residence: Born and raised in Feldcroft! He heads off to Hogwarts and finds a new home there as well— not like he went too far from Feldcroft.

Hogwarts Life

House: Hufflepuff

Quidditch?: Yes! He was brought on as a Seeker in his 3rd year— very young with a lot of responsibilities.

Clubs: Runs Tommy’s Game Club mostly, but is also involved in Crossed Wands heavily, helping Lucan organize these duels. Also visits Reyes’ Racing Club from time to time.

Other Activites: Being involved heavily in Quidditch and running his own game club, he doesn’t really have time for much else outside of studying. What time he does have is either spent sleeping or hanging out with friends in Hogsmeade.

Romance?: Eh. The most he’s concerned with right now is his grades, Quidditch, friends, and Game Night.

Patronus: To be learned.

Animagus: To be learned.

Boggart: To be learned.

Amortentia: To be learned.

Trivia

I wish I was kidding when I say that this kid is inspired by Tommyinnit. I wish I was kidding. He is 80% inspired by Tommyinnit. BUT I PROMISE HE IS HIS OWN GUY!!!

Grew up a bit with Sebastian and Anne! After the Sallow twins moved to Feldcroft with their uncle after the death of their parents, Taylor and Tommy helped cheer them up quite a bit!

Invited them out to play, invited them to help with chores, went running in the fields with them, etc.

Tommy and Taylor were a power duo! They were never seen apart from one another, not once in any day of their lives. Like Sebastian and Anne, they had the kind of relationship that people wished they had with their own siblings.

Tommy is the same year as Lucan— so he’s a year younger than everyone else with Lucan. (In Phil’s 5th year, they’re in 4th year.)

[bagelboys-withcreamcheese]

Modern Things I Would Introduce To Each VDL Gang Member

~~

I had to take some people off because I couldn’t think of anything (I’m sorry please don’t come after me)

*anything you guys come up with, I’ll add to the list in red*

~~

Dutch Van Der Linde

-Science (Mister ‘I don’t believe in evolution’)

-Actual Philosophy

-Mangos

-Curling iron

-Classes in gender studies and critical race theory and he is to take them over and over again until they stick

-Probably the grippy sock hospital at one point

-Animal Farm by George Orwell

-The Catcher in the Rye by J. D. Salinger

Hosea Matthews

-Rocky Horror Picture Show

-Dead Poets Society

-Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

-ABBA

-Bullet proof vests

-Medication for whatever is wrong with his lungs

-Hugs from me specifically

-Planners

-Brokeback Mountain

-Gang of Youths

-That dad thing where they reach back from the front seat to ask for snacks

-Coffee shops

-Used book stores

-Mr. Rogers

-My beat up dragontology book I got for Christmas when I was 10

-Sherlock Holmes (the books, but I’d tell him there’s a show and movies)

-True Crime Podcasts

Arthur Morgan

-Affection and praise without any strings attached

-Art classes

-Digital drawing/art

-Stuffed animals (the toy kind not actual stuffed animals)

-BCG vaccine

-The candle section at any store but Target specifically

-Closed terrariums to keep his flower in

-The Beatles (I feel like they would confuse him but he’d still like it)

-Bob Ross

-Zelda: Breath of the Wild

-Paleontology

-Late night car rides

-Hozier

-Doc Martens

John Marston

-Shampoo

-Monster Energy Drinks

-My Chemical Romance

-Swim Lessons

-Dr Pepper

-Converse

Charles Smith

-Minecraft bees

-Reservation Dogs

-Wood carving and glass blowing art

-Blankets with tiger stock photos on them

Javier Escuella

-Guitar Hero

-Spotify

-Electric Guitars

-Modern clothing styles

-Music career opportunities

-Pepperoni pizza flavoured Combos

-Pineapple Fanta

Lenny Summers

-Marvin Gaye

-Buzzfeed Unsolved

-Just dance

-Mario cart

-Marvel

-Root beer

-Bullet proof vests

-Those really old, cheesy western movies to laugh at

Sean Macguire

-Buzzfeed Unsolved

-Just dance

-Mountain dew

-Mario cart

-Koolaid/capri-suns

-Helmets

-LetterKenny

Jack Marston

-Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron

-The How To Train Your Dragon trilogy

-The Owl House

-Crayons

-Stickers (especially scratch and sniff)

-Diary of a Wimpy Kid

-Star constellations

-Dinosaurs

-Slushies

Mary-Beth Gaskill

-Fanfiction

-Cottagecore

-True crime podcasts

-Animal Crossing

-Cardigans

-Harry Styles

-Hozier

-Titanic

Tilly Jackson

-The Jackson 5

-Fuzzy socks/socks with patterns

-Oversized hoodies

-Lemonade

Karen Jones

-Wine

-Men that’ll last longer than 5 seconds

-Reality TV

Molly O’Shea

-Mitski

-Independence

-Healthy relationship dynamics

-Soft, comfy pajamas

-Bullet proof vests

Miss Grimshaw

-Bullet proof vests

Bill Williamson

-Basic hygiene and deodorant

-A class in gender studies and critical race theory

Kieran Duffy

-Petting zoos

-Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit

-Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron

-Those cheesy horse girl movies

-My Little Pony

Reverend Swanson

-An addiction support group

-Addiction treatment and recovery

-Risen by IcarusFeathers on AO3

Leopold Strauss

-Empathy

-Turtleneck sweaters

-Shark Tank

Simon Pearson

-Pirates of The Caribbean

-British Baking Show

-Hell’s Kitchen

-Betty Crocker

-Moby Dick (if he hasn’t already read it)

Josiah Trewlany

-2am Waffle House

-Harry Houdini

-Martinis

Micah Bell

-Karma :)

Everyone collectively

-Dental/basic hygiene

-Family Therapy

-Those videos they would play in school about what smoking does to your lungs

-Halloween

-RuPaul Drag Race

[danteinthedevildom]

Like, ok, hear me out. My last post was quick and rough bc it was late at night, but now it's 4pm and I've had a thought, and I can def. explain it better now.

Ppl from minority groups esp. the queer community almost always end up connecting best with characters that are similarly othered and mistreated and demonised. There is a genuine, historic media trend of coding villains and monsters with our identities, and for a very long time, that was the best representation we could get. We grew used to identifying with evil because then we could take those characters with little fragments of our experiences in them, and we could re-write them in fandom to be sympathetic, to be loved, to be understood.

A game that takes the original story of the biblical Fall and translates it into a romance game is practically guaranteed to be a hit with queer people. Especially considering the context of the Fall - the fact that it's love that condemns them, a father who ousts them, a family that betrays them, and a situation in which what they stood up against wasn't legal but the punishment and injustice wasn't morally right.

It's quite literally a game about helping and loving beings who have been demonized, and helping them realise they're worth loving. It's a game that is going to strike home harder for people who have been othered as callously as the brothers were, and for people who grew up seeing characters like these as fictional representatives.

Solmare's decision to ultimately make the MC gender neutral futhered this drastically. The genre of otome is so naturally assigned towards straight, cis women that it can be difficult for anyone else to enjoy the games as much. We know, once again, that we're being othered; that the concept of creating a game like this for us is so unthought of, even the ones with M/M or F/F content are targeted more towards fujoshis and rated 18+. They're so very rarely meant for us.

But this game, centred around concepts of identity and family and loss and love, exists to give us the chance to fully immerse ourselves in a way most games of this genre often don't. Yes, sometimes it's evident, especially early on, that Solmare struggled to decipher how to slip out of inherently fem!MC tropes - but it's even more evident that genuine effort was placed into the game to welcome everyone. To let as many people as possible slot into MC's place, regardless of race, of sexuality, of gender.

This game, with its overall gameplay and storyline formula, is the perfect fit for people like us. The reason this game exploded so much more than Solmare's other games - the reason this fandom is so much bigger than the others before it - is in part because it drew us in like moths to a flame.

I literally cannot express how excited people were when we realised this game let you be you. I'm a gay trans guy; my best friend is a bisexual demigirl; the people I knew at the time Obey Me! was released were nonbinary, trans, gay, pansexual - a plethora of different identities and experiences, and very different game tastes. But all of us were enthralled by the concept of this game that didn't force pronouns or designs on you. That let us love beings we'd all felt sympathetic for in other iterations in other media. Even people I knew who hated the otome genre showed interest when they were told that the only identifying feature for the MC was a name.

This is one of the first times I have ever seen - let alone experienced - a game in this genre that not only allowed but actively encouraged people like us to play.

Obey Me! was not made for the queer community, but it was made in a way that welcomes us as much as the original target audience. That gives us as much importance and presence as the straight, cis female audience these games are usually pandered towards.

And now, Solmare are giving us something even more wonderful. Solmare have seen their fandom growing and diversifying, and they have accepted this. Accepted us. These new Exchange Students are being added to reflect the diversity of the people who play the game, and to include us in a way we often never get to experience in these genres.

We don't know who these characters are yet. We don't know anything about them beyond current speculation; that one of them is femme-presenting, and that at least two of them may be nonbinary. What we do know, at least, is that these characters are likely love interests, and that's genuinely incredible.

Because that means these characters are being added for us to love; those of us who aren't the original target audience, but who found the game and its themes and fell in love, anyway.

Because that means Solmare are acknowledging that a gender neutral MC is more than just "straight cis woman Lite"; that some of us do love women; that there's more to the spectrum than just male and female, and that they're just as viable to be loved.

So for the love of fuck, please let queer fans be excited. Please let us thrive in this one fucking game that thematically chimes with us, that lets us love, that lets us be ourselves. I don't care if you don't like the new femme character because you're not attracted to girls; you don't have to date them. I don't want to hear your comments about these characters "stealing your boys away". They aren't made for you. They're made for us.

Maybe it's weird to have content that's not aimed towards you. Maybe you were tonedeaf to the way the fandom grew, or to what it really meant when Solmare said they wanted Obey Me! to be an inclusive game. But please, please, read the room now. Let us love them without making it feel weird.

Because these characters in no way take from you, but they give so, so much to us.

[tomatograter]

Do you think Dirk saying that he doesn't like to label himself as gay means he has internalized homophobia? Or does he really just don't like to put labels on himself? I've seen ppl saying it's homophobia but there's ppl in real life that don't feel comfortable with labels so I'm a bit confused honestly, cus we are talking about Dirk and he's... Dirk after all

Easy answer: Dirk is Gay.

Prolonged answer: I think it's kinda weird how some fandom discussion around "Dirk dodging the label in One pesterlog" has largely spiraled way outside of its original context to be talked about in a vacuum, especially when that context is crucial to understanding what is actually being said, AKA — it belongs to a deeply awkward conversation between Dirk and Roxy. One of Many they are implied to have had about the subject of Roxy's sustained, unwelcome, and oft drunken advances towards Dirk (& his splinters).

I'm going to reproduce it plus another bit of text down below, for the sake of comparison.

(To prevent the trickster text from looking like absolute shit, I have altered the background. Read the original here, if you're nasty: https://www.homestuck.com/story/5754 )

Now that we've been reacquainted with how and where that sentiment is expressed, let's try to break down what Dirk is doing here.

He is not receptive to Roxy's early advances, and spends most of the 'intro' for this conversation (not pictured) ignoring when Roxy flirts with him, until she gets upset at how 'boring' he is being right now.

Dirk is the one compelled to apologize.

He proceeds to shut the scenario down as an unwanted probability, eliciting further guilt-babbling from Roxy over how Dirk never wants to play along with the perfect traditional family fantasy, until she finally blows up and says it's because he's gay.

"I mean, yeah, that's what I thought."

Dirk, rather than saying I Am Not Gay, since he looooooves changing a conversational subject, claims that "Gay" is not entirely historically appropriate for this situation, given the non-negligible passage of time and the wildly dystopic circumstances* they find themselves in.

Dirk reassures Roxy he does still care about her.

Dirk is absolutely terrified of a similarly inclined (and intoxicated) Roxy up close. This is the most exclamations he's ever used.

Now, *These circumstances? The loss of 99% of the human race, including their society, customs, culture, and prejudices. (ALLEGEDLY.) It's important to remember that from Dirk and Roxy's side of the timetable, troll culture has been pushed as "the norm" for actual fucking centuries. HIC tried to recreate the caste system by artificially coloring human blood, leading to the death of billions. Faygo came out of the water tap, not water. Troll slang was incorporated into the English language. Humans ceased to organically reproduce. They were actively Discouraged from reproducing, since that's not something HIC could have total genetic control over; rendering traditional marriage and the concept of the nuclear family pointless.

You could also argue that same-gender relationships are not uncommon in Alternia, making "gay" altogether unnecessary by proxy, and that's true! But my point is this one: any union (or at least our society's holy concept of it) between straightie humans would be by definition undesirable under HIC's rule, too. She is the church, the president and the governing body. The population is only as good as they are assets for her to do whatever she wants with, including mass murder.

But wait! While that tracks… Roxy clearly still holds onto very 'conservative' definitions of romance for most of Homestuck. We see this multiple times. Dirk, as proved in conversations with Jake, uses 'gay' as an ironic pejorative. Suddenly it's not Historically Inaccurate anymore, Jake's interests are just gay.

Does this mean the context above is basically worthless, since they don't seem to have internalized it? No.

What must be kept in mind is this: Dirk and Roxy's only "active" link to de facto humanity is our society as it was in the early 2010's. Those glimpses they get by talking with jane and jake. They have all that dystopic context, yes, but the reality that seems the most "unfucked" to them for a grand majority of their lives are the halcyon years before the Condesce's rise to power: back when weed was illegal, BlogSpot was popular, movies sucked, MTV was still a hip channel, and gay generally meant something real bad. The wave of homophobia as a punchline or fear mongering tactic was at THE HEIGHTS. Marriage equality was a hot debate topic. Those were the dayz.

Dirk is keenly aware of the taboo implication the word "Gay" as a self-denomination carries. He's no dummy. But he's rarely direct with his intentions either. He's slippery as a bar of soap. (He's never "straight about his feelings", if you prefer.) And for a guy that cares so much about his reputation and maintaining a curated sense of utter coolness, he wants to avoid outing himself as any sort of weirdo no matter the cost.

But that's not all. I think the gravity of just how much Dirk believes he *owes* Roxy simply for existing as the last human in the same timeframe as her is a severely underplayed aspect of Dirk's core character, together with how much he tries to avoid her sexual advances only to end up feeling like absolute shit over it, because — if they truly are the last people on god's blighted earth, isn't he being "selfish" and "irrational" about not feeling shit for Roxy, in the grand scale of things? Is Roxy not his only friend in tangible reality, even if he avoids the mere suggestion of visiting her? Even if she gets black-out drunk and tries to push him into indulging her, regardless of how many times he's already said no?

(Spend enough time here and you realize how it directly mirrors the jane/jake experience.)

Dirk cares a lot about each and every one of his friends.

He pointedly adapts his speech based on whichever one of them he's talking to in an effort to express that investment. May it be reassuring Jane, fooling around with Jake, or trying to prevent Roxy from falling into a total catatonic doom-spiral; he avoids telling them anything that would be too crushing to hear. That's not what he's trying to do here. Not to say that he isn't bitchy sometimes, but that’s far from the central thing he does. The Epilogues have retroactively led people to believe that Dirk abhors and despises every single person he's ever been close to before (god forbid) LIKING them, and I think buying too much into that assumption ignores the foundations of his canon text, as well as the central motivation behind 99% of his actions in the story. This is the guy that grew up on Friendship Is Magic, has a picture of rainbow dash shamefully glued to one wall and a rainbow poster of Jake's symbol stapled to another, and everything he does is a little cringe attempt to demonstrate his worth by showing how much he cares about people, even when he's punching his actual feelings down instead of up and saying them.

Which brings us back to the load-bearing part of this question: Admitting to Roxy that there is absolutely no fucking way he will ever agree to having her babbys because he is gay is precisely the opposite of what Dirk wants to say, if his intention isn't pulverizing her. So he doesn't. And his worry on this regard is such that it prevents Dirk from even telling Roxy that he does love her, in the platonic sense, as a friend and hell-earth survivor, because he knows that specificity is what that would disappoint her greatly. (He only ever confesses this to Jane, on the death slabs.)

But also I think this is a really funny visual of Dirk's relationship with the word gay, to put statements into perspective: