hellohowyme

[hellohowyme]

the first rule of being on the internet is you should have other stuff going on, besides being on the internet

[hellohowyme]

Aww yiss

(via)

[hellohowyme]

i think what’s on a person’s nightstand is very telling so reblog this and put in the tags the things you have on your nightstand

[hellohowyme]

Shoutout to this customer at work who didn't know the difference between a bolt and a yard of fabric and put in an order for 8 bolts and then freaked out when it got here and said she didn't want it. we have enough burlap to clothe a small village because of you. What the fuck are we supposed to do with this. We could make individual sacks for every fucking potato in Idaho. We could supply table runners to every single rustic themed white lady pinterest wedding in the continental united states and still have enough to become a rice bag manufacturer. I hope you dream in burlap

[hellohowyme]

[hellohowyme]

has anybody seen my pet piece of paper. his name is walter he is very fragile but very adventurous. i should never have left the window open in my tenth story apartment

[hellohowyme]

just saw a single piece of paper drift past 50 feet in the air over buildings like a beautiful white bird

[hellohowyme]

My little Idiot cat has broken a aquarium cover And a very nice ammonite fossil in the past two days >:(

I really am not looking forward to putting tape on everything

[hellohowyme]

[hellohowyme]

[hellohowyme]

from the deep #24035: be like a crow painting by P. Jean Oliver

[hellohowyme]

I just found the earliest email I ever sent from my email address, and it’s the funniest goddamn thing I can possibly imagine a fourth grader sending her teacher:

(Context - my fourth grade teacher was on maternity leave, and the state of the classroom fish tank was dire under the substitute teacher’s tyrannical rule. The class convened at recess, and decided to inform our (24yo, new mother) former teacher of the situation. I was selected as the duly appointed representative for this solemn communication.)

[hellohowyme]

Shout-out to the bumper sticker I saw the other day that made me feel one second of pure, incandescent rage, which I have replicated in complete accuracy below:

[hellohowyme]

so crunchyroll is fucking evil

[hellohowyme]

you guys want to know a secret?

of course you do

For context, I’m actually a Reddit refugee. I’m actually still on there because I love making bait posts and fake stories (things along the lines of “I think cereal is better with water instead of milk” or “AITA for crashing my (M24) friend’s (F25) car after she told me I could?”). I have five Reddit accounts (to keep it believable). I’ve been on the front page of the site three times. I’ve basically cracked engagement.

I have extraordinary Reddit karma. And I say this with deep shame. I would not have told you this humiliating fact about myself if it wasn’t necessary to pass on this information.

Once you get enough Reddit karma, you start getting invited to secret Reddit societies for elite high-karma Redditors.

This is not a joke.

They all have rules along the lines of “do not make outsiders aware of The Secret Reddit Society or you’ll be excommunicated”

They just hang around and talk about how much Reddit karma they have

Again, I am NOT making this up