#(she eventually gives in in the first instance too but for her to only need the tiniest bit of prodding from him in the second...

[umbrelladripdrop]

DPxDC Idea 2

This one I've actually attempted to write at one point but only got a lil over a chapter done before I moved on and while I do want to write it, I'm also being realistic when I say I probably won't so for a compromise I'll post it here:

Basicly after DP canon has run its course (sans phantom planet obviously) Danny is just chilling with Sam and Tucker when suddenly there's a snag in the conversation that Danny just can't handle. They've all been working together and been there for each other through all the crazy that's happened after the 'portal incident', but at the same time, Sam and Tucker, and even Jazz, can't quite be there for Danny for everything. More specifically, when it comes to the fact that Danny actually died and the effects that has on him.

In my attempt at a fic it came up with Danny complaining to Sam and Tucker about Jazz being overprotective, even if she has been getting better at not being so bad about it all the time, and Sam ends up actually agreeing with Jazz. The friction comes from Sam and Tucker saying how they wish Danny didn't have to be a hero which hurts Danny because he needs to help, he needs to protect the town, and yet his friends are saying that they wish he didn't. It's a bit of a miscommunication sure, but it's also that Sam and Tucker just can't get it and Danny does eventually realize this but not before he storms off and flies all across town.

And on that flight, is where he says those dreaded words:

"I wish that I could just- just talk to someone who understands for once!"

And *boop*! In a sparkle of green dust pops out a real confused Red Hood stranded on a rooftop that has now been thouraly left in Danny's dust as the teen said the words while flying at least 100 miles an hour and therefore did not see the sudden appearance of a person who was not there five seconds ago.

Yep, Desiree is here but literally only for plot stuff as she's the jumping-off point for this fic. She's like the 'big bad' if you want to call her that, but only because they need to fight and defeat her to undo the spell but other than that this would be a pretty chill fic with some nice Jason and Danny (and even Tim and Danny) bonding and shenanigans.

The premise is that, after this wish and first instance of Danny accidentally summoning someone, it keeps happening. After Jason finally meets up with Danny (Red Hood finds himself in a new area so after like a day or two of research and no contact with the bats [ghostly/GIW caused radio black out or something] he does the smart thing and seeks out the towns resident hero) he gets flashes of why he's here and now he knows he's here cause both he and the kid share the experience of death so yeah he's helping this kid now. After that he and Danny (and Tucker and Sam cause they all made up now) find out that anytime Danny states a fact about his life that's weird or slightly traumatizing, he ends up summoning someone who shares that experience with him. Some examples/possibilities I came up with are:

"Who else fights eldrich horrors and what are essentially God's on the regular?" Cue John Constantine popping up, taking one look at Danny, and giving an emphatic fuck this and teleporting out.

"Well- uh- I bet no one else has had their DNA stolen by a freaky billionaire who's weirdly obsessed with them and then cloned them!" Cue Clark showing up frazzled until he sees Jason and just sighs in acceptance of the Weird Bat Shit.

"No! I refuse! There's no way in hell that someone's had to go and fight their future evil self because they came back in time to stop me from making it so their timeline never comes to pass!" Oh and now Tim is here, now him and Jason can start planin on how to fix this mess (and Tim and Danny can start to be friends too. All the bat bonding).

Those are just the first few back to back ones that Danny spews out in his denial that this is even happening after that initial meet up and explination with Jason. Clark ends up dipping with a promise to tell Bruce that Jason and Tim are alright an are just on a mission now I guess, they're not stuck since both Clark and Constantine could leave but it's not like they were just gonna let this shit slide, so yeah they're staying to help out.

Cue plot/shenanigans/accidentally trauma dumping since the spell makes Danny more suseptible to spewing his guts that way the spell can work more by summoning more people. The summons are based off proximity in a sense because they pull in the person closest that can relate to whatever Danny said.

This leads to Jason and Tim end up getting re-summoned again with a few other points like:

"Getting kidnaped by some old creep on the regular is not a fun time." Tim gets teleported back to Danny and they just... stare at each other because didn't this already happen? Aka this is when they figure out the summoning can apparently stack.

"Yeah like I was supposed to know that getting kidnapped by a ‘father figure’ for ‘my own good’ and wanting to strangle said father figure on multiple occasions was a universal experience." Jason who was sitting in a chair ten feet away is now only two feet away and no longer sitting in a chair and falls to the ground with a waterfall of swears.

"None of you get what it's like to have an older sibling as overbearing as jazz!"Jason teleports again and absolutely flips his shit and goes to fucking gag the twirp because this is the third god damned time Danny!

After Jason's 3rd teleportation, they pause the search for what's happening in favor of trying to figure out why he seems incapable of keeping his mouth shut. Literally. Even Danny says that he doesn't know why he's saying all this. They head down to the lab, which leads to this:

"Oh yeah we can go down here all the time, comes with the territory of borderline neglectful parents." Tim who wasn't on the stairs is suddenly now on the stairs (Jazz was leading the way and therefore farther away) and tips head over tea kettle which makes Jason laugh his ass off all while going how does it feel now?!

There's a potential for so many more summonings and accidentally trauma dumping shenanigans/emotional comfort opportunities but these were just all the ones I could come up with.

The day is eventually saved when they trick Desiree back but Jason and Tim end up staying in touch with Danny and end off with everyone being friends cause I'm a sucker for good endings and fluff. Again I might get to making this an actual fic but I'm already working on a big one (and slacking on it a bit my bad) so who knows? But I at least wanted to get the idea out there somewhere in case someone else wanted to play with the idea.

[darkcircles4lyfe]

it's a story about hands (reprise)

Yeah, okay, today's the day.

I gave my blog that title for a reason, you know, and it has loomed over me for years because the hand motif is absolutely everywhere and you could go on about it forever.

Maybe that's something I'll never actually attempt to do, but this chapter, we reached a breaking point.

Before I continue, I need to give a big, big disclaimer: I do not have a physical disability, so I'm not able to speak about that from the standpoint of representation as a first-hand perspective. I have at least listened to enough disabled people to know that fictional characters who become amputees only to miraculously gain their limbs back is, um, a trope. Disabled people in general being "healed" is a conception we would really prefer to avoid here. Not to call people out, but I don't think we're giving enough space to acknowledge that.

I don’t feel comfortable making the judgement call about what should happen. I’m leaving that open. I also don't want to downplay people's emotional reactions. Honestly, I don't know if I can accurately define the line between acknowledging real pain vs. ableist pity. But I’d like to talk about the possibilities of what could happen. Other characters have definitely gotten permanent disabilities as a result of their hero work, or even just the side effects of their quirk. But, for better or worse, I don't think this case is really about representation. Not that Horikoshi won't do that justice. He might. What I'm saying is that's not his purpose for having Izuku lose his arms. It's meant to be symbolic, so we can explore what it means. The other thing I’m keeping in mind here is that Horikoshi is notorious for playing with our expectations, like, alllllll the time. I mean, just take a few chapters ago for a classic example. Eri appeared at the end, and we all assumed she was about to take some sort of action to save someone with her quirk. Then, immediately following, we were given an explanation for why that wouldn’t be happening. And now it’s clear he wanted to do that “fake out” not just as a silly cliffhanger prank, but specifically so we would know not to suspect that Eri could be the miraculous solution to Izuku’s loss of his arms. Rest assured, there is no easy way out of this.

The expectation at play in this particular instance is an old one. It’s very understated, but its subtext has burned so brightly, you’d be a fool not to notice it. It sits with anticipation like one half of a call and response. Man, I was so certain. Lots of people still are. I was really looking forward to printing the panel where it happened onto a t shirt and wearing it proudly. All the hand motifs in this story radiate thematically from a single moment, the one that started it all for Izuku.

It raises all kinds of questions about the act of saving, who needs saving, why, what does it mean, what are the dynamics of power, politics, honesty, exploitation, compassion, pity, disdain, sacrifice. Katsuki has dealt with many of these since he first rejected Izuku’s hand. While Izuku was the one who was convinced Katsuki would keep on rejecting him…

…Katsuki was the one who kept that moment in his mind all these years and eventually came to regret it.

Katsuki is the one yearning for that hand-hold, the one who has imbued it with so much more weight than it ever originally had. Izuku, in contrast, does not allow himself to dwell on what he wants. To illustrate this difference, we need to look at another piece of foreshadowing:

Ugh, do y'all remember when lots of folks were complaining about how there never seemed to be actual consequences for Izuku's destructive treatment of his own body? I don't blame them, I was concerned and confused about it too. There were several "fixes" along the way. Recovery Girl healed him, but left a physical reminder. Then he started training to fight with his legs… sometimes. Then he got support items. All of these were unsatisfying non-conclusions because they didn't present Izuku with a lasting enough impression to change in a meaningful way. They didn't address his core, his origin.

Of course, that all changed this chapter. Now it looks like our frustration was inflicted intentionally. With the current context in mind, all of these moments look more sinister, like this day was always gonna come because they kept putting bandaids on a deep emotional and psychological wound. The problem is pretty much spelled out for us here:

As Katsuki put it, he just doesn’t take himself into account, ya know? He doesn’t care what happens to him. And he lies about it, to keep others from worrying, to keep them safe. To keep them from returning the favor and putting themselves in harm’s way for his sake. His motivations are noble,

…but what about the little boy inside Izuku? Who saves him?

This is all about Izuku giving himself up to the point that he literally has no more to give. The thing is, I bet he saw this coming. He knew his limits and decided to keep going anyway, because his personal safety and wellbeing are not important. Now that way of thinking has come back to bite him because the fight isn’t over yet, and he’s already made his sacrifice. So now we know who will be more distraught over this. Not Izuku—Katsuki.

It’s not about Izuku becoming disabled, it’s about how Katsuki wanted to use the intertwining of their fingers to communicate that he would never let go. Never stop valuing him most. Never let himself make the mistake of rejecting him again. Never let Izuku be so reckless with his life. To say: “we are in this together.”…if only Katsuki believed he deserved to be able to say such things. To reach out his hand would have been the ultimate way to simply imply them and let Izuku be the one to decide. Then, to feel their hands clasped together would be more than either of them dared hope for, but so beautiful, so right. A moment they’ve waited their whole lives for.

Yeah. That’s what we were expecting. We’ve been so comfortable. Horikoshi gave us all the signs. He tempted and teased us over and over. BUT. You know he does this thing were he gives us a desirable, completely plausible and simple thing to look forward to, and then he snatches it away. And THEN he replaces it with something much better, something we were not expecting at all because it seemed too good to be true. That’s exactly what happened when Himiko snatched Izuku away, and we were robbed of the chance to see him and Katsuki fight together. In hindsight, though, I’m glad things went a different way because now there’s so much more depth and angst on display. Likewise, in the present moment, we may consider how, as one door closes, another opens.

As wonderfully meaningful as the hand-hold would have been, perhaps it is still too simple a resolution for Izuku, for his and Katsuki’s relationship. Tbh, it could have been done like 100 chapter ago. At this point, there’s so much more potential. There are a couple of ways it could go. If Izuku stays armless, Katsuki will be forced to use other methods to get his point across. He’ll have to do something else, or say what he means, or both. Yes, I’m talking about what you think I’m talking about. If I say it, I just might jinx it (lol), but I mean it. I’m being serious. Either way, if Izuku did get his arms back in the end, I’m sure that it wouldn’t be an easy fix. It would be hard-won against Izuku’s self-destructive mindset, and/or by Katsuki’s conviction. Again, I say this knowing it is not meant so much as a representation of disability, but as a representation of Izuku’s greatest character flaw taken to the extreme. I know this might sound harsh, like, hasn’t he been through enough? I get that, but… I’ve said it before and I say it again: Izuku is stubborn as hell.

I wish I had a resounding final note to end this on, but I kinda don’t. I’m not sure what’s best. Now we just have to wait and see what Horikoshi has in mind.

[kingtomura]

Vitality | 4

Summary: You were always told heroes and villains had no place in your home.  Not when there’s an increase in crime, not when there’s monsters on the loose in Hosu and certainly not when the man in your home raises a hand to you.  All it takes is one impulsive decision to change your life forever. content: shigaraki tomura x female reader, slow burn, hurt/comfort, mutual pining, reader has a quirk, graphic depictions of violence, past abuse, past sa, angst, pstd, eventual smut, dark themes, found family LoV, mdni wc: 5k | prev | chapter 5 | m. list | read on ao3

Shigaraki is avoiding you. 

You don't have any definitive proof, but you can read between the lines.

It’s not obvious, but you have seen him a lot less than usual, and even though you could be wrong, you just can’t shake the feeling. 

The lack of his presence in the bar, for starters, is one instance. He hasn’t needed any healing help from you either even though he’s been out and about. You can only assume he’s been fine, but it doesn’t take the sinking feeling away from the pit of your gut.

There is something else that’s been bothering you as well. Pulling at your thoughts and living within the walls of your mind.

You can’t stop thinking about what happened a few nights ago. 

The distressed look on Shigaraki's face haunts you, and it doesn’t help that you haven't had a chance to apologize. Hell, you haven’t even seen him at all since that night. Your days have consisted of training and healing, with no sign of your leader. 

Today you are with Toga once more, in a field you have become more familiar with, sparring. 

Twice has joined you both, stating that he was the best person to help — and you agree. He has been making clones of Toga to help you spar and the addition takes away the consequence of harming her.

As for her clone harming you…

Well, you just need to improve — and you believe that you have, as you’ve ended up less on the ground and more on top by the end of the week. 

She comes at you without a care in the world and a knife in her hand, but you’ve learned how to dodge. You know well how to duck and then swing, how to sway is just the right ways that would give you an opening to knock her off of her feet. During your time training you have learned how to get the upper hand. 

Every time you can dodge an attack it makes you feel good.

It reminds you that you’re learning and that this isn’t in vain. 

There’s a moment right as Toga’s clone is about to strike that you see it — the perfect opening. 

Your right hand forms a fist and you don’t think as you do it, just swing and hit the mark, right against her left cheek and it takes the clone down completely. It turns to sludge before you and the claps of Twice and Toga catch your attention.

“That’s one hell of a right hook!” Twice yells to you and you can only muster a small smile, tired out from the spar. 

“Thanks. We can call it here, right?” you ask and Toga nods, the smile never leaving her face.

“Yeah, and your swing is pretty good.” She compliments, hopping off the boulder she sat on and walking towards you, guiding you back to the meeting area Kurogiri tells you all to gather.  “You should ask Tomura about a support item. I think you’re almost ready for one.”

The portal opens before you and it's a relief to see that you were one step closer to heading to bed for the night. Training really drains your energy.

“You think so?” It's a feeble question, one to merely fill the air as you all walk through. 

Toga nods, already making her way towards the door of the bar, no doubt ready to head to bed herself. “I do! You’re pretty strong, little bird.” 

And she’s gone, leaving those words to echo in your mind as you stop in your tracks. 

You’ve never thought of yourself as strong. Not when you’ve lived the way you have for so long. Your first instinct is to deny, but you fight it — instead opting to push the compliment to the back of your mind. 

You should find Shigaraki. 

It's late, but not too late. He should still be awake, and you would like to at least mention the idea of a support item before your confidence slips.

The strength stays with you as you trudge the tunnels, making your way to Shigaraki’s room. 

You’ve never been there, and there has never been a reason to, but you knew it wasn’t very far from yours. The nerves you’ve been so confident stomping out have returned in full force as you approach his door. The worse he could do was tell you to go away. 

So, with your solid reasoning, you inhale and knock at his door, waiting for a gruff reply, but when there is nothing, not even movement, on the other side you debate knocking again. 

Against your better judgment, you try it again and are met with the same silence. 

It feels eerie and your brain is screaming at you to turn tail and go to your room, but curiosity eats at you. 

You bring a hand to his doorknob, pausing as you debate opening his door.

The worst he could do is tell you to go away.

You turn the knob and…

It's locked. You should have known. Shigaraki doesn’t seem like the type to trust others enough to have his bedroom door unlocked and open for all to explore. 

With a sigh you move on, not to your bedroom, but back to the bar. Shigaraki was absent there as well, but you believe Kurogiri may have a clue of his whereabouts. 

The apparition is exactly where you assumed he would be — behind the bar, cleaning a glass, expression impossible to guess behind the wispy shadows that cloud his face.

“Kurogiri,” you start, glancing around the bar once more for good measure, and sure enough, there was no sign of your leader. “Have you seen Shigaraki anywhere? He wasn’t in his room.”

There's a beat of silence between you two, you can only assume Kurogiri is scanning his own mind for places Shigaraki may have gone, but his response surprises you. 

“Have you checked the roof?”

Your brows furrow at the mention. 

The roof?

There is a ladder you have to climb to get to the roof. It's not very high and it's through the red curtain behind the bar’s counter, but it’s there. 

Once you’ve made your way onto the roof and dusted yourself off, you take a look around. 

Lo and behold, there he is, his form relaxed as he looks out onto the city of Kamino, drink can in hand and distinct lack of hand dawning his face. 

“Fancy meeting you here.” you announce as you approach, cringing at your own words, but knowing you had no other greetings in your arsenal. 

He doesn’t spare you a glance, only taking a sip of his drink as his eyes are lost in thought. 

But he doesn’t tell you to go away, so you take that as a good sign — slowly making your way to where he’s sat and taking your own seat. Not too close, but near enough that it’s not awkward to have a conversation. 

You decide to follow his gaze, looking out into the city of Kamino as the sea of buildings light up the area. 

You wish they were stars instead.

The thought makes you look up and see the gray sky above, murky as the fog settles onto the city. You wish there was more to look at, but from this angle you can barely make out the silver glow of the moon through the clouds. 

The naivety in you wishes there was more up there, like a meteor shower or some other natural occurrence you’ve read about in books.

But there's nothing here. 

Nothing but light pollution and fog. 

“So,” you begin, words eager to leave your mind, “training with Toga is going well.”

“Good.” His eyes are far away as he responds, sipping more of his drink as his thoughts swim through his mind. 

You wonder what he’s thinking about, but forgo asking.

Instead, you opt for a nod, excitement showing in your small smile as you go on, “Yeah, since Twice has been with us he’s made clones of her to help me train. They say I have a pretty good swing.” 

This time Shigaraki does look at you, interest piqued and it makes you feel warm that he’s at least a little interested in your training progress. 

“Yeah?” He asks and you nod again.

“Mhm, Toga said I should ask you about a possible support item soon, but I'm not sure what would fit me best.”

“I have a few ideas.” He takes another sip of his drink and from this distance you can tell it's an energy drink. Odd choice for a late night snack. “I’ll check in with you by the end of next week.”

Your eyes widen, a little shocked from how fast you’d be able to have something to help you, it makes your previous excitement grow as you bite back more of your smile. 

“Thank you.”

Shigaraki hums in response, sending the space between you into a lull. It is not unwelcomed — the wind whistles and the breeze is nice as you both watch the city from above. You’re beginning to understand why Shigaraki would want to be out here in the first place. 

It’s peaceful. 

The quiet stretches until the nagging voice in your head begins to catch up with you once more, drawing attention to your earlier struggles.

You want to apologize. 

“Hey, Shigaraki.”

His eyes cut to yours and his red gaze feels intimidating. You hate to admit it, but it’s the truth, even more so in this vulnerable moment. 

So you divert.

“Have you heard any updates about my father?” you get the words out and now that the dam is broken you cannot stop. “It’s been on my mind a lot lately and I've stopped seeing articles. It’s just making me feel uneasy.”

You pause, your heart is racing and you feel a familiar sense of panic in your veins. The same panic you felt at home when you would mess something up in front of your father. Even the mention of him shakes your core.

You move to speak again, but Shigaraki stops you. 

“No, he’s probably done with the charades.” He takes the last sip of his drink, leaning his head back and you watch as his adam's apple bobs with each swallow. 

Once he finishes the drink, he presses one, two, three, four, five fingers down on the can — disintegrating it into ash before your eyes. 

You’ve never seen his quirk with your own eyes, but it happens quickly — the bottle fading into dust and then nothing, swept away by the winds as if it never existed at all. 

“Besides,” he continues, the hint of amusement in his tone makes your heart clench for reasons completely different from before. “If he looked any further he’d only build a case against himself.”

He looks at you again, hint of a smile on his face, “and I don’t think he’s that fucking dumb.”

You look at him and you feel light, the worry from before dissipating in the wind just like the drink can before. You bring a hand to your chest, an old habit that made you feel as though you could heal your own heart — stop it from racing out of your chest and far away from you. 

“Yeah,” you finally respond, a small uptick of your lips calming your nerves, “yeah, he would have to be insane.”

Shigaraki is satisfied with your answer, moving to stand and you follow suit. 

There’s the booming sound of rolling thunder falling over the space between you both. 

It’s going to storm soon and neither of you wanted to get caught up in it.

—--------------------------

They’re sending you on a mission soon. 

It’s somewhere further out and in a different city, so it should be nowhere near your father’s jurisdiction. It’s being led by Dabi since he is just as strategic as Shigaraki and well within his rights of intelligence. They tell you something about it being a part of a larger, more important mission to come along soon. 

You’ve been improving in fighting everyday — the support item Shigaraki gave you really helps. He believed a bat would be a great help in your combat and so far it has. 

They don’t expect you to fight but they do expect an altercation and it’s best to have a healer where they are needed instead of somewhere not within reach. 

“It seems we have some rats in our ranks.” Shigaraki told the group at the meeting, carmine eyes shining in delight at the idea of a challenge to his goals, “and I think it’s time we take care of it.”

It makes you nervous since there's been no reason for you to leave the base beyond training with Toga. As much as you would like to go out and see more, this mission makes you feel uneasy. 

It feels like once you’ve done this you truly are a villain and there is no going back from that. 

The images of your father’s reaction and raging face makes you shiver, but you steadily remind yourself that you are no longer there. That is not your reality anymore. 

However…

You will be on a mission with Dabi. The same man you’ve barely interacted with. The one who is hardly around to get a read on. 

He paid you no mind as Shigaraki explained the details of the upcoming mission further — even going as far as staying behind once the discussion was finished to delve deeper into more details. He was nothing if not thorough. 

You’re not sure what to expect and the thoughts plague you all the way to your room.

It’s difficult to find sleep, but you try, giving in to the tiredness you feel and slipping into the welcoming feeling of nothing. 

You wake with a start. 

Your chest heaves as you look around your bedroom and realize its only you. Nothing is out of place and everything is quiet. 

It must have been a nightmare you were having but the memories are hazy. The dream is already fading away as you blink the sleep from your eyes. 

All you know is that the nightmare was unsettling. It left a pool of dread deep in your gut and you needed to get out. So, making your way out of bed, your feet move to the one place you believed could be relieving at this hour. 

You’ve gone up to the roof a few times before, Tomura is always there. Always silent. Always with a drink of some kind. 

You don’t speak much as there isn’t much to say, but you find comfort in it. The silence is calming and it comes with the lack of pressure from either side to say what’s on your mind.

Shigaraki never tells you to leave. 

He’s told you before that you’re free to do what you want and you suppose this is included. As long as you don’t bother him during his quiet time, you were fine to share the space. 

It’s three in the morning and you hope he’s gone to bed for the night. The roof has become some kind of safe haven but you’ve never been up alone. You would like to see what it’s like. 

But he is there, and you can’t really bring yourself to be upset.

You actually feel a little relieved — the hazy remnants of the nightmare still had you a little shaken, the lack of company would only make you feel worse. 

“Do you ever sleep?” you wonder aloud as you slowly approach. Tomura has another energy drink tonight, but this one is unopened. It looked to be long forgotten by his side as he watched the city below. 

“Sometimes.” he responds, voice low, but you were close enough to catch it.

Shigaraki is wearing his gloves, the black partial ones that you never see him sport inside the bar. Only up here. 

Only with you.

You haven’t gathered the nerve to ask him why that is yet. 

(You’re not sure you will be able to, either.)

So instead you sit — it's always a respectable distance away as you both look out into the city. The calming feeling of the open night feels freeing. It's unlike anything you’ve felt before. Especially not in recent years. 

You wonder if he has nightmares, too. If he’s plagued by visions at night, if they keep him up the way they keep you up. 

Excessive energy drinks in the middle of the night aren’t really good at helping you sleep. 

You wonder what he’s running from — your leader in the League of Villains. 

You stay like that for a while, comfortable silence stretching between you both and you don't mind it — until Shigaraki starts shifting and draws your attention. He’s shuffling around in his pajama pockets and piques your curiosity. 

It's only when he pulls out a gaming console that you tilt your head in confusion. It's small and portable, but he’s never brought anything like that up here in the short time you’ve joined him. 

Your confusion only grows as he extends the device to you. 

“What?”

“Take it.” He offers, and you cannot help the way your brows furrow and frown deepens. 

Why would he offer you this?

You meet Shigaraki's eyes, deep red and passive, then down at the console — even through the partial gloves he wore, Shigaraki still held the system in an odd way. It’s black and holds a few scuffs and scratches. Well worn. Well loved. 

“What’s this for?” you ask, no longer worried to question the man. 

He only scoffs, look of confusion now painting his own features. “Don’t tell me you don’t know what a gaming system is.”

“I do!” you shoot back, embarrassment bringing heat to your cheeks. It's gone as soon as it’s arrived — your confusion dissolving into curiosity. “I mean, why are you giving this to me?”

He looks at you like you’ve asked what the year was, “You said your father took your console away.”

Your eyes widen at his words, shock evident in your movements as you take the device from his hand. He’s quick to pull it away as well, but you don’t think about it further. You only look at the scuffed gaming console and ponder why Tomura Shigaraki of all people would give it to you.

“It’s old and I don’t really use it nowadays,” he starts, causing you to meet his eyes once more, “Sensei said the games there were good for learning to strategize. It helped, but I don't need it anymore.” 

You stare down at the device — scratched and worn, no doubt played for hours. 

Although it seems like a half thought of an offer, there’s still a vulnerability to the situation that makes you warm. A genuine effort that makes you want to be genuine in return. 

“He’s not my real dad.” You start, shaking Shigaraki out of whatever thought he may have been lost in. “My real father skipped out on us. And he married my mom when I was young. Then… we lost her.” 

You’ve never had a chance to talk about your past. To open up. Growing up he had always drilled into your mind that he was your father, then your only guardian after your mom passed.

His behavior became weird — he became obsessive after the loss of her. 

Said that you needed no one but him, and he needed you too. 

Only you. 

Shigaraki says nothing, and you continue, “Sometimes, I like to pretend my real dad is out there, somewhere. Maybe lost at sea or something.” 

You laugh, a sad huff of breath. “I don’t think anyone like him could be a father, even though that’s all I know him as.” 

It feels weird talking to someone you barely know about your innermost thoughts, but it’s a faint relief off of your chest.  

“That sounds awful.” he starts, “Being at sea for months on end. I would probably get seasick.”

Now you laugh, genuinely. “Have you ever seen the ocean?” 

An innocent question, but one that makes him ponder. “No, and I don't think I want to.”

“Why not?”

He shrugs, nose scrunching at the idea. It's cute, you have to admit. “Too bright, too noisy and it probably smells bad.”

You smile, light and innocuous. What a negative nancy. “I’ve never been either. I would really like to. I had planned to, but…” you pause, mood souring. “But he wouldn’t approve.”

You don’t know why you're still talking, but the dam has burst, contents of your heart spilling over and out. 

“I'm an adult, you know? Twenty! It sucks seeing all my friends move on and do other things with their lives. But I was stuck.” you pause, looking at the ground, “I told him so, too. That’s where it all went wrong that night.”

That night.

You remember. 

You remember it clear as day. 

The argument happened during dinner.

A night like any other, so you hadn’t seen the escalation coming. Your friends had been telling you about a program, a little study exchange in a small beach town where anyone could go to research and learn about the animals in the area. 

You didn’t have many friends, but the few you held dear would be going. It would be a shame to be left behind — to have to spend another year in this house. 

It was a simple thing, you brought the idea up to your father, told him about how good of an opportunity it would be for you. 

That’s where it all went downhill. 

He got so angry, furious at the idea of his only daughter running off to some beach with god-knows-who doing god-knows-what. He told you to go on and forget it — it wasn’t happening.

Not on his watch. 

This was it, the final straw. You couldn’t possibly spend another minute at a table with someone who was so deadset and keeping you down and caged.  

So, you do something you never had.

You yell at him. Tell him he’s being ridiculous, that you should be able to go out and do your own thing. All your friends were able to.

By the time you realize you’ve chosen the wrong words it’s too late. 

Your father stood to his feet, the screeching of the chair ringing in your ears as he stomped his way over to you. 

“Where did all this energy come from?” 

You felt your heart sink as he stopped in front of you, his form towering over yours as you regret even opening your mouth. 

“Was it a boy?” he hissed and you wished then and there you could take it back. The outburst, the trip, everything. But it's out now and in the open. You would have to face the consequences. “Have you met a boy and he’s gotten into your head?”

You shake your head, desperately denying the claim, but he didn’t want to hear any of it. You move to stand as well, feeling powerless from your chair and he grabs your wrist.

“You’re not going.” He spits, voice stern and grip achingly tight, “you won’t be some back alley whore as long as I’m around.”

“You’re being ridiculous!” The panic is evident in your eyes as you try to pull away and talk some kind of reasoning into him. “There’s nobody, I’m telling the truth!”

The struggle you put up to release your wrist only makes you lose your balance, dropping to the dining room floor and landing on your elbow. The pain is pushed to the back of your mind as the towering, angry man before you drops with you, pinning you to the ground.

You feel frozen as he continues, too far gone in his anger to hear you out any further. 

“What does he have that you need so badly, hm?” There’s the strong odor of liquor on his breath, he’s always had a problem with drinking. Even more so after your mother passed.

“You’re being crazy.” Your voice is a whisper, trembling in disbelief at his actions. It’s never gone this far. 

“Oh, I’m being crazy? Look at you!” His eyes are wild and you’re sure he’s lost it. “My little girl would never raise her voice at me.” 

His tone lowers and the alarms in your head start to go off as your panic swells, spilling in the form of apologies and pleads for forgiveness. Anything you could think of to end this fight and go to your room. 

He doesn’t listen to you, only murmuring odd comments about your appearance. How much you look like your mother. 

It made you feel sick. So, so sick as you realize the apologies will not work.  There are no heroes coming to save you and your guardian has gone off the deep end. 

All the lingering leers, all the not-so-casual touches in the past have led up to this. Your breathing feels heavy as your heart beats relentlessly against your chest while you try to make sense of your situation. He finally tells you that you won’t leave him. Even if he has to break you, he’ll make sure of that.

Your brain kicks into overdrive as he reaches for his belt — the chiming sound triggers your fight or flight to kick into action. 

Adrenaline pumps through your body as put all your strength into a punch that lands right against his jaw. It's not much, but it's enough to knock him off kilter as you kick — successfully knocking him off of you and shakily stand to your feet, wasting no time running for the living room. 

It’s naive to think you could make it, but you try, only to have hope crushed as he grabs the back of your shirt in his fist, keeping you locked in place and the door well out of reach. 

It couldn’t end this way, you wouldn’t let it. 

You reach for the closest thing to you and it’s a potted plant in a vase. A glass vase. You don’t think, just grab the object with all your might and swing—

It shatters and he’s down. There's blood pooling below his head, but everything is quiet. You can’t believe what you’ve done. You reach your hands out, your natural instinct to heal has become muscle memory for you, but you pull them back.

He’s out like a light. He’s done.  

You look around the silent home and realize it’s only you. No bystanders, no prying eyes. Just you. So you do the only thing you can at that moment. 

You run. 

You run as fast as you can and as far as you can. 

Your first steps to freedom. 

The air is crisp. It's the only thing you can think of as your short inhales shake your body. You can’t remember where you are, what you were doing who you were with—

Until… until there's the crack of a can, the fizz of its contents bubbling and you can smell the sugary sweet soda inside. 

Tomura is in front of you, he’s still sitting and his expression is as neutral as you’ve ever seen it, but he’s holding something out to you. His energy drink. 

You blink once, twice, three times as you look from his carmine eyes back down to the can again. He’s shoving it towards you again and you can only assume he wanted you to take it. 

So you do.

You’re careful not to touch his fingers, even though they remain gloved, and bring the can to your lips. You chanced one last glance at Tomura, worried that deep down this was some kind of test that you were sure to fail, but he had already turned back to the open city. 

The drink is sweeter than you thought and you wonder how he could even drink these — in the middle of the night, no less. But it grounds you. It gives you something else to focus on.

You turn back to the sky,

“It’s getting cold out.” You speak, wanting nothing more than to fill the silence.

“Yeah.” 

The sun is starting to rise over the horizon, the tiniest peek of light through the dark, and the buzz from the energy drink was starting to rouse in your veins.

It’s a fleeting feeling — temporary, like the hazy memories of your nightmares. 

“Do you think I did the right thing?” The question falls from your lips before you can catch it, but you don’t regret asking. 

You liked to hear Shigaraki’s opinions. 

“Yeah.” He looks off into the distance, mind as far away as his gaze. He is deep in thought and you wonder if it’s about his past. “I do.”

You wished the sky looked different — a little less gray and a little more bright. 

Like there were actually stars looking down on you both. They’re not visible with all of the light pollution of a busy city, but you wished they were. At least it would be something to keep your eye on while you sat out here with Shigaraki. 

Something to distract you from the gnawing feeling in your chest. The one that screams at you about how close you were to danger. 

It’s easy to ignore. Shigaraki makes it easy. 

He is stoic by nature, but there are little actions, small things that show you he listens. 

You’ll have to prepare for the mission soon, but right now moments like these are nice.

Fleeting, like ash in the wind.

[sunshine-jesse]

Another confession post: I feel the arguments about Andrew and Ashley being equally culpable as corruptive influences on each other are unfair and/or lack perspective. Even setting aside how Decay Part 1 showcased that Andy was flatly denied and castigated by Renee if he ever tried to distance from Leyley or pushback against her brattiness until he eventually gave up completely on even the subconscious level.

Like sure, Andrew is a chronic enabler, and an argument can be made that he subtly encourages her worst quirks both intentionally (deliberately picking verbal slapfights even though he claims to despise when they bicker, early instances of egging on petty mischief) & unintentionally (his default response to her tantrums is appeasement), but he’s rarely if ever the driving force in Ashley causing serious harm. She proposes malicious courses of action entirely on her own every time. She’d be exactly the same without him there, and if her worst excesses were toned down it’d only be because she didn’t have a larger body to hide behind if she got herself into a situation that poses legitimate physical risk to her.

I’d say the story also tacitly lectures against a reading where Andrew is the root of what’s wrong with Ashley: What is the single topic of all of his constant soul-searching, the issue that the Narrator is perpetually snarking about and raking him over the coals for? Andrew’s own, internal Moral Decay; his entwined lust & desire for murderous payback against Ashley, his barely restrained contempt towards other people besides her, his unconscious love of violence and growing habit of solving all his problems through killing to make himself feel big and strong. Him fucking up Ashley by spoiling her as kids is incidental and ancillary to the condemnation the narrative incessantly screeches for over the crimes he commits by his own hand, and as you yourself point out his admission of guilt on that front is framed as more wrong-headedness and/or abused person logic from him in that moment.

The only thing Andrew did wrong (specifically on the Leyley front) is not firmly curtailing her when there was still a chance of instilling a sense of ethics in her. And if we’re gonna advocate treating Ashley with kid gloves because she’s mentally ill (despite you posting multiple times disapproval of fan-diagnoses, a stance which is officially shared by Nemlei) then I don’t think it’s right or reasonable to hold Andrew culpable for not standing firm on that course of action when basically his every formulative experience aimed to actively beat the wish to let Leyley face consequences out of his head (some of the time literally).

It's complicated. I don't know if I'd call either a corruptive influence to the other, so in that sense I'd definitely make the claim that they're equally culpable.

What I will make, however, is the claim that the two of them will corrupt themselves without the influence of the other. I'm going to speak on Andrew first because you summed up Ashley rather well here, although I still have more to add.

Both of them were deeply fucked up people for a long time. In Andrew's case, it's somewhere between heavily implied and outright stated that what Andrew loves most about Ashley is the parts of her that reassure him; that give him permission to do whatever he wants. Even before three months of isolation with Ashley, he lusts after her, feels empty without her, and has violent sexual fantasies all of his own accord. Between that and the fact that he was fucking blushing when he heard Ashley's violent calls, it seems like Ashley's abuse of him (and others) gave him what he wanted: A convenient excuse (and valid reason) to self-victimize, Ashley's attention, the chance to defend and advocate for her (fulfilling his fantasy of being a good big brother), etc.

(I use that phrasing on purpose, btw. He didn't want the abuse itself, it just filled specific emotional needs he had.)

Andrew's mindset shouldn't be too far removed from how a lot of people who have had chronically abusive relationships think, although perhaps few of them feel comfortable framing it that way. Many abuse victims- especially ones who were victims from such a young age- have a very unfortunate tendency of building their emotional needs around what abuse gives them, which is part of why it's so hard to leave.

To name an example so people HOPEFULLY don't misconstrue what I mean:

Andrew needs to feel like a good brother and putting up with Ashley's shit is good person behavior to him. Defending her from other people makes him feel like a good brother, too, given his fantasy of being her protector.

She also gives him excuses to vent his violent tendencies, all the way back to episode 1:

"That's a lot of meat."

"Though, I mean….. Is it still illegal if we didn't kill the guy?"

They were on the same page all along, and his first concern was illegality. Many such cases repeat throughout the story, leading to the narrator saying the following:

Which feeds into the whole "Ashley didn't make him be anything he wasn't already" thing.

HOWEVER.

It's frankly victim blaming to judge Andrew for not enforcing boundaries on Ashley from a young age knowing what we know (retroactively apologizing to Andrew for that one. I'm sorry, my precious blorbo, I didn't know how bad it was). It's also accurate to say that she didn't "corrupt" him so much as enable him... in the same ways he enables her, although I disagree that fighting is part of that.

But what we do know, thanks to Decay pt.1, is that Andrew setting a firm boundary is good for both of them. So, you raise another very good point here with that in mind, because it's shown that treating Ashley with kid gloves is actually the worst possible thing someone can do for her. She NEEDS to be treated like an adult, taken seriously, have her merits (and, as an extension, the threats she can pose) be acknowledged and treated with the gravity they deserve, etc etc.

Treating her with kid gloves is the opposite of what she needs, because the moment she does any of that, she starts to feel out a new dynamic, self-reflect, and maybe even change!

Anyways Deltarune came out so that's gonna consume my mind for the next week or so, toodles.

[obsidianpen]

Howdy! Awhile back you mentioned you weren't likely to get back to Enticed and asked if anyone wanted to pick up and write the rest, you could share your plot/plan with them... I'm no where near as good of a writer as you and couldn't do that (it actually terrifies me the idea of trying to continue a fic that you started tbh, you are one of my favorite writers). But I still find myself sometimes imagining what happens in later chapters of Enticed, for instance the big showdown at the end of OotP where Harry finally presents at the Ministry, and then in Year 6 when Harry as an Omega leads to some kind of huge Alpha fight (I imagine something like a massive chaotic bloody fight in the Great Hall where the Alphas are all triggering each other & beating each other to a pulp/dueling while the Omegas hide and Betas run for cover and teachers try to stop it). So, I wanted to ask if you wouldn't mind sharing maybe your general plot/key scenes with us just for fun? And maybe the endgame couples? If not, no worries! :)

sure! Spoilers ahead!

so yeah Harry presents as a delta (omega) during the whole ministry fiasco, ofc, and it’s about as dramatic as you would expect me to make it. It happens during the possession scene and so V is right there - like couldn’t be closer to it really - and loses all self control and sense of self, trying to uh, get Harry lol but Bella, also a delta, is there, and she and Harry’s dynamics actually revolt each other so she’s not affected at all. She manages to drag her lord away to safety (she is the only one who would be powerful enough to do this), where he otherwise would have been caught by Dumbledore.

Harry meanwhile is a mess, and it’s too late for any kind of repressing potion for him. He gets taken away by Dumbles (who has MUCH more self control than Voldemort btw) and is put into quarantine. Poor Harry, it’s not a fun time.

he eventually resurfaces and is told what all happened. He has a nice little chat with Dumbledore about the uniqueness of being a Delta, which Dumbles knows all about, because duh, Grindelwald was a delta. (He also learns ollivander is a delta).

year 6: Harry is getting all the stares. He’s finally able to perceive magic and now he GETS it. He and Ginny (also an omega) have insta-bonded. Hermione is protective and already planning future ministry legislation. Ron is uncomfortable but is still Harry’s best friend and ride or die.

Draco Malfoy keeps a great distance from Harry but can’t seem to keep his eyes off him. Harry gets it because he’s having the same problem with him and about six other alpha wizards. He still hates him.

Harry is no longer able to stay in the boys dorm. He now has to stay with the other omega girls in their special dorm room, which he finds mortifying at first, but then realizes how necessary that is, and grows to enjoy them quite a lot.

Harry is aggressively adopted by Godiva (self appointed Head Omega of the Gryffindor squad) and is forced to be ‘one of them’ (though he still escapes all the time and prefers to hang out with his ‘lowly beta’ friends). Godiva is upset when she learns his name is not Hadrian or Harrison. She calls him Hadrian anyway. In lieu of being able to give him a real proper lady make over, she and Fey (who has a muggle mother as I’m writing her) figure out Harry’s glasses prescription and get him some contacts ‘so that his lovely eyes can be admired properly’ and because ‘those glasses are hideous and you’re going to make us all look worse if you wear them’. Harry is sort of into it once he gets used to it. Snape kicks him out of class when he shows up without them with no explaination.

Harry becomes obsessed with Draco Malfoy. Hermione tells him it’s just because he’s an alpha and says be needs to go shag someone else to get over it. Ron is still uncomfortable. Harry says it’s def only because Malfoy is up to something Bad but he isn’t sure if he trusts himself anymore.

Harry (who has to be even more meticulous with taking repressants btw, because he’s not as predictable as a delta) thinks yeah maybe hermione is right actually but every time a bold alpha dude hits on him he panics and can’t handle it. Godiva sighs and makes it her mission to teach him.

the Myrtle bathroom scene with Draco goes very differently. Idk for sure how that would go but probably Malfoy has been forgetting to take his repressing shit what with how stressed he is and there’s probably some pretty intense hate sex, or at least very close to hate sex and plenty of hate snogging. Is this drarry? Maybe

the death eaters still break in, Harry still goes with Dumbledore, Dumbledore still dies

seventh year starts semi similarly, Harry is out with Ron and Hermione doing their thing and hunting horcruxes but they have a limited supply of the repressing elixir for Harry. Voldemort, being a bastard who still very much wants to kill Harry (perhaps more than ever now, because deltas are exceptional and this makes Harry more of a threat in some ways), puts insane regulations and safety measures around repressing elixirs for omegas, as well as any ingredient needs to brew it, making it impossible for Harry to get his hands on any without outing himself. They eventually run out when they’re out camping in the woods when Ron is with them and they have the locket.

he has no options. Hermione and Ron have to tie him up and help him suffer through a heat when one hits (they’re beta so they can’t help in the uh, other way). Harry is losing his mind halfway through it. The only thing that helps at all is the locket. He somehow gets to it and puts it on. Locket Tom reaches him in a dream and manages to convince a half-mad Harry to say ‘voldemort.’

the snatchers show up first. This includes Fenrir Greyback. He immediately goes insane upon finding Harry like that. But voldemort has been waiting for something like this to happen, so he shows up too.

big crazy alpha duel. V versus Fenrir. Hermione and Ron can’t get anywhere near the insane magic that’s happening, but Harry can. He’s having the wildest magical awakening of his life, and when he commands these two alphas (who he no longer sees as individuals in his current state) to kill for him, they do (or they try to anyway; Voldemort wins)

and then ofc Voldemort is supposed to kill Harry because that was the point of all this. But he sees his locket and Harry’s wearing it and that poses many questions and, well, if he’s going to kill Harry anyway he might as well enjoy him first. Somewhere in the middle of that much more intense and messed up hate sex, he realizes what Harry is, so of course he takes him ‘home’ (and don’t worry either he takes him away from hermione and Ron first or more likely Harry somehow banished them, idk the details there but I would not have them watching that lmao).

uhhhh yeah that’s about how far I had the plot going in my head!

[mandrake-mistakes]

To Snare A Mockingjay

Gale's inner monologue when Peeta brings up "all those nights on the train." I saw some discussion about this (discussers tagged below) and wanted to give it a shot. DISCLAIMER I know this is pretty mean, if you think its too far for canon Gale that's fair. I'm just having a little fun with it. Also obviously Gale's opinions are not mine

@heartforeyes @liberalk1tsch @butterflyintochains

___________

My hackles are up the moment I spot him, with his guards to either side and a cold, dead look in his eyes. Predator eyes, I think. They’re locked on the back of catnips head. I notice her tense next to me as she swivels to follow my gaze. After years of hunting together, I can sense when she’s poised to run and when she’s about to strike. Right now, it could go either way. 

Peeta sits down. There’s some back and forth with Delly. Some bad joke with Finnick Odair. But I’m only watching Katniss. She’s been better lately, more focused, but what will she make of this patched together shell of a man? Maybe, he can find his way back to something resembling normal and she’ll be able to finally let him and all that hunger games madness go. When this war is done, I’ll be able to build something new, in a new world, and leave everything to do with twelve, and coal, and district fences behind. I want to bring her with me, but I can’t do that if she’s stuck in her past. 

“He did save your life, Peeta. More than once.,” says Delly. 

I remember that, watching Katniss on the screen lose her head over it. Sometimes she’s still that twelve-year-old I met in the woods with too much sentiment and not enough grit. There was no way he was going to survive those games, she had to have known that, that they couldn’t both win. She needed to be stronger about that. The first snare I showed her, she complained it was unfair to the rabbits. I told her it was more fair than starving to death and she came around. She always comes around eventually.

“For her,” Peeta says, jerking his head towards Katniss. “For the rebellion. Not for me. I don’t owe him anything.”

“Maybe not. But Mags is dead and you’re still here. That should count for something.” Katniss snaps. It’s a relief she’s angry and not just pitying him. Pity won’t get me anywhere. 

“Yeah, a lot of things should count for something that don’t seem to, Katniss. I’ve got some memories I can’t make sense of, and I don’t think the Capitol touched them,” he says, “A lot of nights on the train for instance.” 

Apparently, she comes around for anybody. If Peeta wasn’t already wounded beyond repair I’d knock his teeth out for that. I clench my jaw and pull my fists under the table to maintain some semblance of control. She lied to me; Katniss fucking lied to me. She told me everything with Peeta was an act but there was clearly more going on than even the cameras knew about. Desperate people do desperate things, but I always thought she was better than that. Cleaner, somehow, more careful. The thought makes my stomach churn. Next to me, a flush is creeping up Katniss’s neck and she looks away from Peeta, down at her tray of food. It’s as good as an admission of guilt. 

I’d like to be shocked, but I long suspected this is what he had over her. He gets in her head and the fire and fight I know she has in her gets muddled. At least now I know how and why. That old hatred coils around my chest, the one I always felt watching her kiss him on screen during the games. The betrayal of it, the way she acts like I don’t even exist, it burns white hot. 

“So, are you two officially a couple now, or are they still dragging out the star-crossed lover thing?” Peeta asks, pointing to me with a spoon. He’d best be careful I don’t shove the thing back down his throat. 

“Still dragging,” pipes up Johanna. 

Peeta was always hard to hate, which frustrated me. It would’ve been easier to just have it out with him and be done, but he was such a decent guy I had to point all the jealous rage at Katniss, for putting me in that position in the first place. But now, now I can really loathe him and it’s a relief. Who would’ve believed it. 

“I wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t seen it myself,” I say. 

“What’s that?” Asks Peeta. 

“You.” 

“You’ll have to be more specific,” he says, “what about me?” 

“That they’ve replaced you with the evil-mutt version of yourself,” says Joanna. 

Yup. That about sums it up. 

I’m not going to sit in the humiliation anymore and I want to get Katniss out of here, away from Peeta. I acted too slow last time but I won’t make that mistake again. This time it’s me who has the proximity, the access, and the upper hand. There won’t be any more trains.

“You done?” I ask her, ignoring Peeta entirely and finishing my milk. She doesn’t answer, just stands up. I walk her out of the room with a backwards glare at Peeta as Delly starts to lay into him for his “rude behavior.” 

I truly didn’t expect him to be angry at her quite like that, it’s such a jarring mirror to my own pain. Maybe, this can all work out for the best. If a lure doesn’t get your quarry where you want it to go, sometimes you can direct with a deterrent instead. If Katniss can take a few more steps away from Peeta, she’ll find herself right in my arms, and everything will snap into place just as it should. 

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Can we have more tea from the mansion? 👉👈

Click here for part 4, which has links to the other three parts

Some of the upstairs floors several years ago had not yet been reinforced (as they have in the present day), and so they were quite weak and fragile. Due to this, everyone was told to be careful and not do anything like roughhousing upstairs. Well, before the floors were reinforced, there were two specific instances. Firstly, Toby got a new pogo stick and Tim warned him NOT to use it upstairs. Toby did, in fact, use it upstairs and he ended up breaking through the ceiling. The second time, Sully and Jeff had gotten into a fight, and Sully suplexed Jeff into the floor, causing both of them to go through. Toby, Jeff, and Sully were required to partake in doing the renovations.

The only time LJ and Jason have ever really had a lasting fight was before one of Jason's galas. As I've said before, he attends many balls and galas in the Underworld so he can remain in the upper class in the Underworld. Well, for these he always dresses up to the nine's in very fancy and original outfits every single time. Before an important one, LJ and Jason were joking around, but as Jason was getting dressed he told Jack to calm down. Jack did not calm down, and he ended up accidentally breaking and spilling a bottle of red wine Jason was going to gift someone on Jason's outfit. Jason was the angriest Jack had ever seen him, and the two didn't speak for months because Jason was so upset, although they talked through it eventually.

Most of the residents have a variety of stuffed animals of some kind. When Sally feels lonely, sometimes she borrows some of their plushies before returning them because she's too shy to ask for them. If anyone notices a plushie is missing, Sally sneaks the plushie next to Smile Dog and says it was him. They all know it's actually Sally, but they don't want to make her upset so they always give Smile a fake lecture and some consolation treats after.

Slender has an incinerator on the property for disposal purposes on the side of the mansion, kind of close to it. When managed correctly this causes no issue, however, Toby one day through some stuff in there he shouldn't have. This caused the incinerator to light on fire, which almost caused the mansion to light on fire. Luckily the damage once they'd finished putting it out wasn't too bad thanks to the incinerator being on concrete, but had it been on the grass Toby would have started a forest fire. Everyone has now lost privileges of access to it and only Slender may use it.

When Jeff first came to the Underworld he was scared and nervous and that caused him to lash out a lot. However, he nearly gave Slender a heart attack one day because Jeff, having to meet Zalgo (as Zalgo is aware of all residents in the Underworld and needs to be aware of any other demons bringing in humans), was not really aware that Zalgo was the king of the Underworld. In fact, he looked up at him in all his anxiety and said, quite loudly and obnoxiously, "Who the fuck is this guy? Why do I have to meet him?" Slender nearly strangled him then and there, but it was pretty obvious Jeff regretted it the moment he said it and Zalgo thought it was funny. Zalgo still teases Slender about that instance to this day.

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 71 Heartbreak Posting

Welp. Time to cry, dear void.

Editor's Notes:

First Page: 封印されていたイヲリの記憶... [fuuin sa rete ita Iori no kioku...] "Iori's sealed memories..." Last Page: 明かされる罪… 示された未来... [akasa reru tsumi... shimesa reta mirai...] "Sins revealed... the future unveiled..."

Iori's Past

Iori's 17 in canon, confirmed as of this chapter. Yay we got her age.

A second character gets the spotlight without Chihiro showing up at all, and it's everyone's favourite tragic daughter. Once we get the kanji for her name I'll be confident in saying that she's here to stay as a cast member. Hopefully without getting shoved out of entire arcs, but y'know. No excessive bitterness allowed.

"FINE I guess I'll give her a name. Here. Don't fucking complain about it." - the author (maybe)

Hokazono-sensei really does name characters at gunpoint, huh. We didn't get the kanji for Inori's name either so there's nothing to look into in that respect but man, what a woman. I'm interested in how she met and fell in love with Samura but I think that's beyond the scope of this story.

I kind of hope we don't get any more dead moms for our cast members after this. We've got three confirmed instances now (Char, Hakuri, and Iori) and two implied permanent or near-permanent absences (Chihiro and Hiruhiko, though I concede that the latter is still mostly unknown). Someone in the main cast's gotta have a mom that's alive and well and not intended as tragic backstory fodder, right? Yeah? Even Disney stopped relying on the Dead/Missing/Evil Mom tropes a while back...

Let's talk about the good things though.

Go off, princess!

Well maybe not so good for Samura but we kind of expect him to be a complete and utter failure of a person outside of being a swordsman by now, right? Abandoned his wife and never visited his daughter so she had no idea who he was... poor Iori. She had every right to hate him then, and has every right to ream him out in the main story once they reunite again.

I've only seen Inori for one chapter but I'm going to say it: she was everything Samura needed, but she was too good for him. He lost her by refusing to stop dwelling on the past -the war especially- and she eventually ran out of patience. Good for her honestly! I like it when a character recognises they can't fix a major flaw in their partner and chooses to leave rather than hope they get better some day. She's not hating his guts or anything but she just lost patience with him and his refusal to find a way to manage his grief and be there for the people who love him. It's incredibly human and healthy! (Is that why she had to die?)

Little TL note:

Go off, queen!

What Inori says here is: "He's the worst! He's always dwelling on the past and totally neglecting us!" Hokazono did the little trick with the Ruby again so the word heard spoken aloud is "past" thanks to the hiragana (かこ for 過去 [kako, "the past"]) but the kanji is 戦争 [sensou, "war"] to let the audience know what she really means.

At any rate, she's completely right about Samura being a total failure of a person outside of swinging a sword. He's being such a martyr over what he did that he can't even bring himself to be there for his little girl! The hell! How can you be so wrapped up in yourself that you abandon your daughter and lose a woman like Inori? By being a traumatised war vet with intense guilt that you can't or won't get help for, that's how.

But life forces Samura to face the future through Iori anyway and it's so freaking funny.

It's the little things sometimes.

Samura can't tell what's going on despite his super senses because he's not used to living with a child as a blind man- I love touches like this. The character writing for the series is still top-notch even with the weaknesses in pacing and theme execution this arc. I'm always amazed that a 24-year-old has such a thorough understanding of people and relationship dynamics. Most of all, though, I'm so happy that Iori gets to be a classic morally upright shounen protagonist -nerfing herself fight the "enemy" on their level, facing things head-on with spirit, endangering herself to protect others- to contrast Chihiro's more modern dark and troubled take... without the baggage of being a girl! She's just a kid doing her best with the shitty circumstances she's found herself in. Another author might put emphasis on how she's still a girl despite her shounen characteristics by showing her venting to dolls instead or being extremely cutesy, for example. But Iori's just straight up challenging her dad to "competitions" with training swords and knives and trying to learn how to fight like he does. I adore this kind of writing so so much!

I'm also a big fan of how this chapter was used to quickly explain how Iori could fight while still focusing mostly on how she was "competing" with her dad to vent her anger like little kids do. She's got a firecracker personality and heaps of stubbornness to see her through tough times, but she's still just an 8-year-old kid who loves and worries about her mom very much. So she processes it through trying to get on the same level as her enemy, her deadbeat dad. At least Samura finally realises it's a great way to keep her distracted from her mom's situation! He starts looking to the future at last thanks to Iori dragging him out of his own head. Not a moment too soon, either because...

A dad who recalled his wife's last words and decided to embrace what he'd been avoiding all this time... if Kyora had a will of adamant, then Samura's is far more brittle- but that's not always a bad thing.

He's not a great parent all of a sudden but his heart's finally in it to try, at least. And that's what Iori needs most in the moment.

Chapters like this are the core of what makes me so invested in Kagurabachi. Examining legacy, trauma, and other painful burdens through the lens of parenthood is where this series truly shines. All the kids in the main cast have deeply flawed parents who passed on their pain to them unwittingly, and now they have to figure out how to grapple with it while the Hishaku are plotting dastardly deeds. For me, Kagurabachi is a riveting story of musing on how legacy affects everyone differently and it just so happens to use stellar action scenes to tell the story most of the time. It's what makes more grounded chapters like this stand out and hit all the harder.

Short Detour: On Character Names and Kanji

I mentioned it before so I kind of want to yap about it a bit. It's funny to joke that Hokazono-sensei only names characters at gunpoint, and there's some merit to it with how often we're left hanging, but I think he's quite deliberate about it in certain cases.

For instance, we knew who Chihiro was from the get-go obviously. He's the MC so he needs something for us to call him by. But it was only ever spelled as チヒロ [chihiro] in katakana until this flashback right before the "keep a cool head" moment during Char's rescue in chapter 14:

"It's great that you're so serious about what I teach you an' all. I appreciate that but... don't get too fixated. If you always try to follow in my footsteps, it'll be a waste that you were born as Chihiro Rokuhira".

That's when we saw the meaning behind his given name for the first time: 千鉱 [chihiro, "thousand ores"]. It's not something that can come across in English but the profundity of the moment is exceptional thanks to this small reveal. Chihiro is malleable and can become anything he wants- he has a thousand possibilities in front of him. He should choose his own path instead of strictly following in his father's footsteps. This is what allows him to bend Enten to his will and tap into the blade's True Realm.

The only other characters with names that we don't know the kanji of right now are Char (鏡 凪シャル), Hinao (ヒナオ), Kazane (真智カザネ), Iori (イヲリ), and Inori (イノリ). Everyone else has had the kanji stated, especially if all we know are their surnames/code names (like Azami, the Masumi, and Ikura). "Char" isn't a Japanese word or name to begin with so she'll always have the katakana most likely. Hinao is a mystery but also barely a character so I wonder if we'll see her again much at all anyway. Inori's in a similar boat as a one-chapter character that was used for Iori's tearjerker backstory. Kazane and Iori have the biggest chance of a reveal (assuming Kazane does come back of course). Especially Iori since she's hugely important to the story this arc. She's making a lot of parallels to Chihiro already as a fellow child of a famous Seitei War "hero" with skeletons in their closet, so it would be cool to see a kanji reveal happen at another deeply emotional moment for her. I'll definitely make a note of it if it happens!

Anyway, back to the chapter.

Samura Seiichi, John "Yura" Hishaku, and Sin

[starts foaming at the mouth]

UOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH DON'T TEASE ME LIKE THIS AAAAAAAAAAAAH. YOU CAN'T GIVE ME A PAGE LIKE THIS THEN SAY "KEEP WAITING, LOSER"!

I'm vibrating in my seat, frothing at the mouth, internally flailing and screaming, champing at the bit. I swear to God if we switch back to the present and don't follow up on this page next chapter I am going to fucking explode from an apoplectic fit. It's not just from being strung along with Seitei War lore tidbits for so long either.

There are no world-building tidbits that can get me more interested in a work than post-apocalyptic imagery of cities being overrun with nature. I will dive head-first into anything that has this kind of shit no questions asked- I'm a fucking addict. Forget 2B's lovingly rendered 3 ton ass, I played Nier: Automata because of the atmosphere while running around in destroyed cities. Lord of the Rings is my ultimate comfort read because of all the ruins with deep lore scattered around. I forgive a lot of the flaws in the Xenoblade Chronicles series because it uses this imagery in every game. I even kept confronting my thalassophobia to get through all of Outer Wilds because of this stuff.

The iris and lily flowers in view make it obvious that this is Magatsumi's handiwork and boy howdy do I need to know all about it. Did this happen on the small island that supposedly attacked Japan? Is it still like this today? Or, given John's dialogue, is this something that will come to pass later on? I need to know. I've been edged on this for so long and now I've been served imagery that makes me certifiably, obsessively insane once more so please. Author.

Hokazono-sensei.

Listen to me.

I'm sincerely begging you here:

Let me cum.

Samura, though... oh jeez. Samura. What are you doing man.

Chapter 51. Going to keep this scene in mind as we learn more info.

This scene with Chihiro and Shiba ocurred years after Samura met John for the first time. I ended up making a colour-coded major event timeline just to be sure I wasn't crazy thinking this was pretty whack of Samura. The relevant flow for this is: 22 years prior: Small island nation allegedly appears in the south-east seas 20 years prior: Seitei War begins 18 years prior: Seitei War ends ~17 years prior: Iori born 9 years prior: Inori hospitalised, Iori taken in by Samura 8 years prior: Inori dies, Samura meets John 5~4 years prior: Chihiro meets Samura & goes to his home 3 years prior: Kunishige murdered & blades stolen, Samura makes pact with John 2 years prior: Iori's memories sealed Oct. 5th in present year: Story start

We don't know what John and Samura talked about yet- maybe John didn't give Samura all the info, maybe Samura wasn't on board until after Kunishige was murdered (that's when he made that pact with the pinky ring after all). But holy shit he knew some bad stuff was happening and maybe even knew that Kunishige was going to die. Maybe he already felt that the Bearers all need to go, too. But he only warned Chihiro away from following his path and told him not to admire him. This man is so fucking complex!

Tear track scars again... (chapter 58)

There's also the matter of that pinky promise. My working theory is as follows: whatever John told him had Samura at least somewhat sympathetic to their plans. But he wasn't convinced to act until Kunishige was killed and Chihiro effectively orphaned. That was what brought his desire to save the "future" (Iori) into focus through the lens of the past he can't bring himself to move on from- he decided to end things on his own terms because he saw the same thing happening to his own kid no matter what and wanted to spare her from the pain of losing both of her parents (and his inadequacies as a father/person). So he had her memories sealed to let her live a normal, happy life while he worked with the Hishaku to root out evil in honour of Kunishige's ideals. "Evil" in this case being the Bearers, the Hishaku, the Hishaku's mole, and then himself. I hope this pans out but I'll be happy if I'm wrong too, of course. The author is the best one to tell his story.

Kyora's still my favourite villain so far but all these tragic shades of grey have me extremely invested in Samura. Honestly, depending on how this arc goes, Samura might take the #1 spot. He doesn't have the bombast of Sojo or the personal resonance that Kyora does. Instead, Samura's a rich and incredibly compelling villain due to how much of a genuinely good guy he is. He's fucking up big time over and over again but it's for extremely human reasons. Who hasn't ever given in to wallow in grief and guilt for a spell? Who hasn't felt the effects of those feelings warping them, if ever so slightly? Imagine them compacting down and running rampant for years thanks to a horrible secret you can't share. There's still so much to uncover about Samura and the Seitei war but it's easy to understand how he ended up where he is.

This chapter was a great reminder of why I still read Kagurabachi and yap about it every week. Despite all my complaints about how the story is being told at the moment, the character writing is still top-notch. I hope we see all these puzzle pieces we were asked to keep in mind for 20+ chapters now start to fall into place! For now I think I'll start drafting some comparisons between Kunishige-Kyora-Samura and Chihiro-Hakuri-Iori, with the expectation (wish) that we get the full picture on Samura's motives sooner rather than later... Sojo really stands out as the first arc villain now since he doesn't have the parental ties to the core of the narrative that Kyora and Samura do. He was just a lens to examine Chihiro through, while Kyora and Samura build on Chihiro's character and examine another character's takes on the theme at the same time.

Okay! Hopefully the editor's comment isn't bait and we stay on the Seitei War Lore train next chapter too. Else I really will start malding. See you next time, kind void, and take care of yourself in the meantime.

[demonslayedher]

Yushiro & Takeuchi friendship headcanons

--Takeuchi got through the final battle relatively unscathed, so he is quick to check up on Yushiro in the aftermath. Having just lost Tamayo and still being overwhelmed by everything, Yushiro just wants to hide and be swallowed up by his emotions for a while, so Takeuchi's company was initially unwelcome, but it turns out to be really good for Yushiro and he unloads more than he thought he would. Takeuchi is a little confused and can't put all the pieces together, but he it accepts it pretty readily.

--Takeuchi continues to enforce his friendship and company upon Yushiro, even once Yushiro insists he's fine by himself (with Chachamaru, whom Tamayo especially left to him). Takeuchi can't be dissuaded so Yushiro gives in and lets him hang around.

--If there's one thing Takeuchi knows about demons, it's that they are ravenous for human flesh, so it finds it concerning that Yushiro never seems hungry, so this leads to Yushiro explaining why he's a special case who subsists on small amounts of blood collected in ways that don't harm humans. He doesn't like that he has to consume it at all, though. Takeuchi offers his own blood again; because he was a strong Breath-powered swordsman, consuming his blood would mean Yushiro could subsist on even less blood. Yushiro refuses because he'd rather pay poor people who need the money; Takeuchi has a Corp pension and doesn't need it. (More so, it's because Yushiro would find it too weird to consume the flesh of someone he knows personally.) This is an ongoing bit in their friendship, Takeuchi continuing to offer and Yushiro continually refusing.

--Takeuchi takes up painting (based on a Murata-related headcanon stated in this one-shot about Murata & Giyuu finally getting dinner together), and he's eager to show Yushiro one of his early works. The most beautiful thing he could think to paint was a sunrise, for it was always such a long-awaited moment throughout many battles Takeuchi fought while in the Corp. Then it occurs to him that Yushiro doesn't get to appreciate such a beautiful sight, which is why he wants to give him that painting. Yushiro, too much of a tsundere to accept it, snaps back that no sunrise could ever be as lovely as Tamayo was. Takeuchi, not offended, sadly states that he never saw Tamayo, so he wouldn't know. Now in an awkward position for having snapped at someone who did a nice thing, Yushiro has to follow through and attempt to show Takeuchi what Tamayo looked like by making a painting of her. Yushiro has a natural talent for it, and Takeuchi is stunned and praises his skills, but Yushiro is frustrated by not having managed to capture her beauty or essence. He has to try painting another. And another. And another. And another.

--Since Yushiro has already lived a long time, it's hard to see Takeuchi as an equal at first; he seems like a small child. Little by little, it's like watching Takeuchi grow up. For instance, one night Takeuchi happily announces that he's courting the daughter of an old wisteria house who he was always sweet on, some months later he's heartbroken because she was only dating him out of a lingering obligation to the Corp. Yushiro winds up falling into a lot of self-reflection about how hard it must had always been for Tamayo to see him as anything more than a child, for the gap between them was so large that even feelings as deep and sincere as his own could never overcome it. This is around the time Yushiro starts really accepting the companionship of Takeuchi, Tanjiro, and Kiriya (whom he sees like more of an equal more quickly than he did with others, seeing as Kiriya has experience beyond his years than closes the gap Yushiro feels with others).

--Takeuchi, despite being busy with the never-ending affairs of the human world and eventually raising his own family, always makes sure to pop in on Yushiro, for he knows Yushiro will never go out of his own way to seek company. It has to be forced upon him. Yushiro acts annoyed when Takeuchi visits him, but he is always a gracious host and they spend hours talking together. Chachamaru says hello and accepts some petting from Takeuchi but typically stays on Yushiro's lap. Yushiro doesn't drink it, but he serves Takeuchi black tea in fancy dishes, and they sit around on velvet chairs in a low-lit basement filled with Yushiro's paintings. Takeuchi never stops with his outpourings of praise and wonder for Yushiro's talents.

--Takeuchi brings Yushiro new copies of "The Legend of Zenitsu" so he can laugh and be entertained by Yushiro's scathing reviews of them. Takeuchi doesn't know this, but Zenitsu brought out an inferiority complex Yushiro can't stand to admit even to himself; it drives him mad how Zenitsu could paint Nezuko with such perfection on a first try, and in his defensiveness he insists it's because Zenitsu has the model to look at. Yushiro pulls from years of dedicated observation that has honed his memory, so their works can't even be compared (or at least, that's what he tells himself).

--Takeuchi eventually falls ill, and Yushiro goes out of his way to pay visits to him. Takeuchi tries to stay positive about it, but the frustration of feeling himself get weaker and weaker and his own inescapable mortality do get to him from time to time. He tries to be as brave as the people who didn't survive their battles in the Corp, but it's hard. He jokingly insists that even though he's weak and wouldn't make for an appetizing meal anymore, he wishes Yushiro would just eat him for his own sake now, if it gives Takeuchi some means of living forever. But that's all it is, a joke. Yushiro, having been in Takeuchi's position before, is heartbroken to watch him go through it, but admires Takeuchi for handling it so much more bravely.

--He's not able to say so at first, but eventually Yushiro is able to open up and talk about his own experiences with illness, and how he would never wish it upon anyone, he has no regrets about being a demon, for even without Tamayo, he still has a zest for life.

--It's a long decline, but Yushiro hangs around as a hospice nurse, and especially as a friend. By this time, he and Takeuchi truly feel like equals. After Takeuchi's peaceful passing, Yushiro doesn't really keep in touch with them, but he keeps a special eye on on Takeuchi's descendants.

[shippingmyworld]

My Veilguard hot take is that Davrin's companion quest ultimatum should have ended with the choice to save either Assan's life or the lives of Assan's siblings. Let me explain.

Davrin's narrative is constantly a pull of self vs. community. He left behind his entire clan because doing his duty to his community and preserving history didn't bring his self any fulfillment. The first time you go for a walk with him he tells you that he found fulfilment through hunting, which eventually turned to monster hunting, which led him to the Grey Wardens. However, this came with the unexpected consequence of hardening his personality. With death around every corner, he could no longer be true to his kind and caring personality (insert over-cited evidence of Davrin singing to Halla as a child). Members of his community could disappear overnight, and would do so regularly because of what the Wardens did. That's why when Assan came into the picture, he tried to keep the griffin at arms length. After Weisshaupt however, Davrin lost nearly his entire community and was only pulled out of his despair and anger when Rook reminded him that Assan needed him. Davrin let go of his community willingly again, and was able to find joy in being true to his self again and raising Assan.

The Wardens were still there, albeit broken and scattered for the time being, but Davrin stepped away and focused on Assan. That's why Isseya is the perfect foil for Davrin. She's also a Grey Warden elf that made the opposite choice in this instance, she chose to fulfill her sense of duty to her community instead of herself, and then lost herself after her Calling.

That's why the final 'ultimate' call with no good ending for Davrin should have been a choice between saving Assan or saving Assan's siblings. Imagine that Isseya is moments away from finishing her ritual to successfully blight the other griffins. Davrin sees Isseya's struggle, sees himself in her eyes and understands her plight of self vs. community, and still wants to believe and appeal to the kindness that he knows is somewhere deep down inside her. The same kindness that he's carrying himself. Isseya did what she did out of love for her community, however her love for the griffin's of her time was just as strong, which is what twisted her into the Gloom Howler. As we see in-game, Isseya's been too corrupted by the Blight, become too devoted to her crusade to 'rescue' the griffins from the Grey Wardens to give up and Davrin's final appeal to her fails. So, paralyzed and broken, Davrin turns to Rook and Rook needs to make a decision; either charge in with Assan and risk the young griffin's safety to rescue the rest of the clutch, or hold back for the ritual to start and give themselves and Assan a safe window of opportunity to strike down Isseya.

If Rook charges in, Isseya will abandon the ritual and turn her full attention on Rook and Assan. This would end with Assan giving his life to protect Rook, allowing Rook to strike the fatal blow. The other griffin's are safe, they won't go extinct, but now Davrin has to mourn the loss of the griffin he came to see as his own son. He wouldn't blame Rook of course, Assan lived as a Grey Warden should, preventing Darkspawn from taking the lives of others and fulfilling the final part of his vows, 'In death, sacrifice.' However the pain of losing Assan will never fade and should Davrin survive the final battle, Davrin will sacrifice his self fulfillment again to fully devote himself to his community in order to honor Assan's memory as a Grey Warden. The griffins remain with the Wardens, and Davrin makes sure they're always treated properly, however never gets close to another cub again.

If Rook holds back, Isseya will be too focused on her ritual to prevent getting struck by a surprise and fatal blow from Assan and Rook. Assan is safe, however his siblings are now either dead or blighted from the ritual, meaning they have to be put down. This means Davrin has failed his duty as a Grey Warden since he couldn't keep the griffins safe. Now Assan is the last griffin left in existence and once Assan dies, the griffins will be extinct once again. He wouldn't blame Rook in this scenario either because it kept Assan, his son, safe. Should Davrin survive the final battle in this scenario, he'd sacrifice his place in his community since he'd never able to forgive himself for failing to save the griffins. He'd instead devote himself to raising Assan and taking care of Arlathan Forest, like his Uncle Eldrin.

I think that personally I'd just like to see something that has more immediate and recognizable consequences then what the game gives us. The negative aspects of bringing the griffins to the Wardens vs leaving them in Arlathan just seems too vague to really feel like the choice has much of an impact. Sure, history could repeat itself and future Wardens might take advantage of the griffins, but that's big 'what if' that's just looming in the distance. And if you leave the griffins in Arlathan, you're just letting nature take its course and letting wild griffins live their lives without any sort of force to protect them, which is another big 'what if' regarding their future. Plus if some big bad blight-related threat did appear on the horizon, the codex entry from Ghilan'nain implies that griffins are already natural predators to the blight so no matter where they are they'd likely come back to fight it off, Grey Warden trained or not.

[yoosungisbabie]

between night and morning - day three

@juminweek2019

jumin x mc

rating: T

prompt: green daylily - romantic love, "forgetting painful events from the past," "the flower that helps forget"

warnings: nightmares, slight spoilers for Jumin's route

word count: 1.4k

ao3 link

Jumin wakes from a nightmare and goes searching for comfort.

°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。

Jumin…Jumin…

JUMIN!

Jumin snapped awake, jostling his chair and inhaling raggedly. He looked around, seeing that he was still in his living room and most importantly, still alone.

Jumin leaned forward and put his head in his hands, unable to shake himself from the nightmare he’d been awoken from quite yet. It was one in the same vein as they all were; memories he’d tried to forget even though he knew he couldn’t. Memories from his and his father’s past.

Jumin wiped the sweat from his brow and worked on slowing his breathing, keeping his eyes open and focused on the carpet beneath his chair. When he’d calmed down just slightly, he sat back up, glancing over at the paperwork he’d been working on before he unfortunately dozed off.

His eyes ached at the tiny print on the paper, and just as soon as he picked it up, Jumin put it back down and sighed slowly. He felt useless for so many reasons, and having that ridiculous nightmare made him feel less and less in control. He needed to be in control, in that moment more than ever.

An image of her flashed in his mind. His heart palpitated strangely, like it had been doing for the past few days, but it wasn’t dizzying anxiety like he’d felt just moments previous. If anything, thinking of the woman in his bed nearly made him forget why he was so on edge in the first place.

Jumin took a deep breath before he stood from his chair. After not moving for quite some time, the tension in his body was uncomfortable. He started towards his bedroom, remembering all he’d said to her last night as he felt his body untie some of its knots.

As he approached the door, he heard her light breathing and couldn’t help but smile. Peeking in, he admired the way she looked so peaceful, so carefree. He was sincerely thankful that she was able to get rest, despite all of the events that had transpired over the past week. He felt a flash of envy before it melted into gratitude for her presence.

How could he bear to let her go in the morning?

Jumin had taken a step into the room before he’d thought about it, unable to think of a reason that made sense for him not to move closer.

He stopped just next to the bed, able to hear her breathing much more clearly and realizing his own breaths had calmed back to normal.

Staring down at her, the only label for the emotion that was burning in his chest was love. He was in love with her. The feeling itself was not what frightened him, but the thought was horrifying. How could he love someone, let alone someone he’d met only days ago?

In multiple instances, his father had been beguiled by women he mistakenly put his trust in. He watched him ponder over it and inevitably give in, no matter how much Jumin urged him to see reason. Eventually, Jumin stopped trying.

But as soon as he no longer outwardly cared, that’s when those women began to focus on him too. The thought nearly brought him back into his nightmare, blinding rage flashing across his vision.

MC shifted in the bed in front of him, pulling him from his thoughts. It felt almost wrong to be upset in her presence. How could he lose himself in thought when she was right in front of him?

Jumin sat down slowly, working to clear his mind as he watched her sleeping peacefully. His eyes scanned over her face, taking a long look at her lips. Her kiss was like magic, some kind of force he’d only read about in books. Thinking of her smile made his chest feel fuzzy, and when he moved to look down at himself out of slight worry, Jumin realized he’d laid down next to her.

He paused, feeling his heart rate quicken. He had never lost control like he did when he was with her. It perplexed him, but he was equally as confused as to why he didn’t want that fact to change.

She was so close to him in that moment, so beautiful and so serene. His hand moved out towards her, lingering above her face before he brushed the back of his index finger along her cheek. Her deep breaths shallowed, prompting Jumin to wonder about how heavily she slept.

Taking his hand back, he waited as she returned to a deeper sleep, his eyelids growing heavier as he lay beside her. After a moment, he reached out again, pulling the blanket back over her shoulder. This time, he couldn’t pull away, and he rested his hand on her upper arm. She was warm, contrasting with his cool hand. He felt the hairs stand up on his arm, his fingers tightening around her minutely. She reacted with a short, low hum from the back of her throat, but she didn’t move an inch.

Despite the feeling that was burning in his throat, Jumin decided to let her rest, praying that he would have time to explore his curiosities on another calmer night.

A thought flashed in his mind for him to remove himself from the bed, from her arm, but the thought was quickly buried by fatigue. Jumin worked to keep his eyes open, to look at her for just a second longer, but his exhaustion got the better of him.

Hours later, when the sun had begun to rise, Jumin innately roused. Some days he wished that his bodily rhythm would allow for longer sleep, especially this past week.

He willed his eyes open, starting to sigh before his breath caught in his throat in panic. Her face was inches from his, and as the blood began to rush through his body, he realized that she was touching him too. She was still asleep, breathing slowly as Jumin looked down to see both her hands outstretched to him. One of them was draped over his upper arm, her hand reaching down towards his back, and the other had a small handful of his shirt. It had come slightly untucked in the night, leaving just enough fabric to be gripped by her hand just above his heart.

Jumin looked over her features, knowing that his heart should be racing with anger, resentment, or guilt. But when he searched, there was nothing but peace and eagerness to learn more about her. To hold her like she was holding him, and to love and cherish her for the amazing soul she’d offered to him in kindness. He would forever be indebted to her for the solace she’d provided him in his lowest moments.

Jumin watched her until drowsiness began to take over him once more. He was tempted to stay, to let her hold him as long as she wanted, but he knew he needed to keep himself grounded. It was important for him to let her go today or else there would be no possibility of them being together in the future. He had to regrettably detach from her, just for today, just enough to let her leave, so that he could be bound to her forever.

Jumin longed to reach forward and press a kiss to her cheek, her forehead, her nose, but he didn’t want to wake her so early. He slowly began to move backward out of her embrace, holding his breath as she twitched and took her arm back. But her hand still gripped his shirt, and even as he continued to move, that fact didn’t change.

Jumin reached down, his fingertips brushing over her wrist as a test before he gently placed his hand over hers. Hooking his pinkie finger under hers, he pulled her hand from his shirt achingly slow, nearly hearing his heart rate pick up as she latched on to his finger instead. Jumin placed their joint hands on the bed in front of him, rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb until he could pull his finger free. The loss of warmth from her touch made his chest ache in a way he had become too familiar with these past few days, but he steeled himself.

Standing from the bed, he imagined himself waking up with her every day, kissing her good morning, and leaving her to sleep more. Jumin felt a small smile come to his lips, shaking his head and lightly scolding himself for daydreaming.

Taking one last look at her, he left the room, closing the door behind himself and realizing he finally felt rested.

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thank you for reading! thank for you for all the support on my first two days! I have had long nights and work, so I know I'm late, and then on top of that, I got a concussion this morning...

but! I'm still going strong, and I'll do my best to catch up! (even though I shouldn't be looking at screens ladglsjbgljgb)

mel x

[fishys-still-writing-smut]

Sonia is definitely one of those Rich Kids who get farmed for money. Does she mind it? And how do her challengers react when she finally runs out?

Warning: Lewd Content Below

“Oh dear. It seems I've lost again. Very well then.” Sonia with an ass full of cum reaches into her wallet. Fucking some PAWG ass, or “rich bitch farming” as the pros dub it is an advanced strategy for gaining large amounts of money in quick succession. In just 3 short steps any amateur pokewhore trainer can have a near infinite well of funds.

Step 1. Select your bitch

Picking the correct bitch to farm is a very important skill. You mustn't pick one that's too prude that she isn't willing to fuck on a moments notice. Yet you also can't pick one that's too slutty to the point where they don't bother to wager any money before challenging you. The trick is to pick someone who's confident enough to believe they can win but too stupid to actually pull it off. And for our purposes, the bimbo princess of Novaselic is one of the prime whores the pros love to farm

Step 2. Do you research

Once you select your girl, you can't just challenge her to a battle right away. If you can't win consistently every time, then you could end up in a mountain of debt. Instead, study your prey before engaging. Take note of any fetishes you can glean that could be used as a weakness. See if you could watch them engage in a battle, or try to strike a deal with people who are already farming her for info. It may cost you a bitch of your own but it's mighty worth the cost. If you're nervous about taking another trainer's sloppy seconds, then you're in the wrong line of work my friend. The more dicks in your future cash cow the better. For instance, Sonia Nevermind is farmed by a handful of trainers, making it easier to learn about how to quickly make her submit. Just strike the right deals, and you'll learn her weakness in no time: that she's a complete anal slut!

Step 3. Master baiting

In order to properly farm girls, you need to give them a reason to keep battling you. Eventually, you'll break them and be able to fuck them whenever, but in order to get their you need to confirm that they'd be willing to get fucked down again. To best do this, try striking up a casual conversation with them first. Repeat over multiple days at multiple different times to establish a relationship. Then, go in for the kill shot, and bait them into wanting to defeat you. Any reason works, from insulting one's pride to blackmail to lecherous behavior, it's all fair game so long as they come back to get more cum on their backs. With Sonia, all you need to do is call the Nevermind family a bunch of walking cum dumpsters. She'll then immediately want to battle you, not for pride, but because she's shocked that you knew, and needs to ensure your silence. From there, pound that blonde bimbo's butt into submission!

And there you have it, an easy 3 step guide to farm rich whores. The rest is up to you. You could farm multiple whores in order to have multiple avenues of wealth. You could make a quick buck scamming the rich housewives of unsuspecting trainers. Or you could even capture one of these girls yourself to not only inherit their wealth, but have a new girl to own. Though you'll constantly be challenged by other male trainers who are also trying to farm rich women, that's a problem for a later date. Right now, there's more important things to worry about, like all the rich girl ass you have yet to pound!

[mapofthemazeinthemirror]

I have been meaning to yap to you about this because I am a certified mafia jjun enjoyer but….listen!

two things: one (1) reader is hired by said mafia group to protect the leader (yeonjun) gosh I imagine like enemies to lovers? she hates yeonjun at first, and thinks he’s so so mean. At first he thinks “how is she going to protect me?” but she’s protecting him more than physically. he eventually eases up on her and ends up being mean to everyone but her. gahhh something about meanie jjunie that has a soft spot gets me.

two (2) this might be quick but reader and mafia boss tyun being from rival families, but they cross paths and end up falling for each other. aaaah forbidden romance <3

ASH I LOVE YOUR MIND. Thank you for feeding me with this. I’ve been craving gang txt ever since the new gbgb choreo, the part where it looks like they’re fighting 🫢 Number two (2) with Taehyun is so yummy, just imagine the banter they'd have with each other!

words: 1.8k oops

warnings: a bit of workplace discrimination, mentions of attacks, criminal activity, blood briefly, treating wounds, probably too soft at the end

If there’s one thing you’re going to do, it’s do your job damn well regardless of your personal feelings towards the man you’ve been hired to protect – and especially if said man seems to think you’re not fit for the job. It appeared Yeonjun was not pleased when you first showed up to work, pulling a member of his team aside and having what looked like a tense conversation. It only made you more intent on proving your position. You often butted heads, unable to agree on the right approach to many things. Yeonjun prioritized quick gains, confrontations and aggressive plays, recurrently willing to forgo his security or the safety of the more expendable members of his organisation to get what he was after. On the other hand, you wanted him to undertake less risky tactics, ones that were better for his reputation, his long-term safety. There were a couple of instances where he tried to plan some dealings without you, locking you out of his office and leaving you to stand outside fuming and trying to hear what little of the discussion you could through the crack in the door. The men took you even less seriously after that stunt – if the boss didn’t respect you, why should they?

Using your intel, you cleverly plan out routes for the driver to take that steer clear of trouble. At first Yeonjun is annoyed and questions the detour, but later that night, he learns through his informant that police were doing a random car check on the usual route, due to the crimes of a gang in the area. When he thanks you the following morning, you think you've earned the respect you've been craving. However, the good feeling doesn't last. As the day goes on, not only does Yeonjun give you his drink order, as if you're a simple assistant or coffee runner, he also laughs at a joke one of his men makes about you, right in front of you.

And maybe from time to time you fantasize about the young, stupidly good looking, ridiculously well dressed mafia boss getting what he deserved; about letting his laundering fall through, letting his shipment go to the wrong country, or turning a blind eye to the betrayal of one of his most valuable men that you have discovered. But you're a professional, and professionals don't let their sour thoughts derail their career.

It's only when the truth about the disloyalty of Yeonjun's right hand man is laid out for him that things begin to change. You had supplied all the proof, having hired a private investigator of sorts to get the incriminating photos you needed, accumulating dirt on the man who was Yeonjun's favourite, his oldest friend in the business, until there was no room for doubt in his mind.

What you hadn't expected was for the boss to show up at your place a few days after your exposé, looking more exhausted than you'd ever seen him. The betrayal had hit him hard. He seemed despondent as he glanced around at the place you lived, showing no reflection of his opinion. You weren't even sure how much he was taking in with those tired dark eyes. His hair was not to his usual standard, and his coat which was usually tied fashionably at his waist hung open and loose on his thin frame. You felt more awkward standing before him in this state than you ever had when he'd been laughing at your expense. You offered him a seat but he turned it down. All you could do was stare and wait for him to speak.

“I'm very grateful,” he began. His voice was hoarse, bringing a deepness to it you'd never known. Finally he looked you straight in the eye for the first time since he'd arrived. “I never would have seen it for myself. I was blinded by my… If you hadn't disclosed this to me…” It was the first time you'd seen him struggle to articulate himself. You nodded in understanding, and he seemed relieved.

After that, you were given a raise – a silent one, since he applied it without saying anything to you about it – and an office of your own. Not only did the jokes and snide comments from the other men stop, but they seemed to eye you with caution, some with reverence. You had become the one Yeonjun trusted most, the one he came to with his concerns, and nobody would ever question your value again. Not unless they wanted to face the boss's fury.

Things have been good for a while: you love your job – and maybe, as much as you hate to admit it, your boss, just a little bit? – when something unforeseeable happens. You're busy handling communications when you spot Yeonjun's ride pull up in the underground lot on the security monitor. Watching as the two front doors of the vehicle swing open and both the driver and the ridealong dash to open the back doors, your anxiety is thrown into gear. Then Yeonjun stumbles out from the back seat. You're on your feet before you see them check him over, out the door before he can wave them off.

By the time he's in the building, there are more men around him, asking questions and putting their hands on his shoulders in concern. He shakes them all off in annoyance, ordering them to get back to work. As the men fall away he spots you standing by, and he softens. When he approaches, you see the sharp red lines that are scratched into the side of his face, notice the bloody cuts on his hand as it sweeps his black hair up over his forehead.

“What happened?” you ask when he reaches you, even though you have a pretty good idea in your mind. You need to know anyway, as you keep a record of all offenses committed against him.

“It was an ambush,” he says simply. He watches your hands take his bigger ones from his sides and turn them over, inspecting. His hands suddenly feel cold in contrast to your warm skin as you make contact.

“Are you okay?” You glance briefly up to his eyes, indicating that your question does not refer to his obvious abrasions.

“That bullet proof glass might need a touch up,” he states rather matter-of-factly in reply, looking away from you. He sounds so nonchalant, as if it's not a big deal. Your heartbeat has picked up significantly, an unexpected reaction to hearing about danger that has already passed, and you realise that a threat to Yeonjun's safety means more to you than it should; more than a professional responsibility for his security.

You usher him into his office and locate the medical kit. This is the first time you'll be putting your first aid training to good use, you muse silently as you pull the lamp down close to Yeonjun's face. It's an intimate position you've found yourself in; Yeonjun seated on the large plush sofa while you hover above him, one knee on the seat of the sofa to steady yourself. You don't even register that your knee is between his spread legs, so focused on treating his injuries. You've never touched him before, and yet it feels like one of the most natural things you've ever done as you work instinctively, the fingers of your non-dominant hand along his cheek without your noticing. His warm eyes, which had seemed distant just a moment ago, check your face occasionally, until he abandons subtlety and they unabashedly train on you as you treat him, lit by the glow of the lamp. You try not to notice it, though you definitely do.

“I usually do this myself,” he says quietly as you reach for a new cloth and the bottle of disinfectant once more. The tug of a lazy smile appears on his mouth. “This is much better.”

Your eyes meet his, and all at once you feel much too warm. Now that you're not concentrating, you notice the placement of your knee, and your whole body seems to come alive. Retracting it as casually as possible, you hold your hand out to him, hoping your flushed state will go unnoticed. The feeling of his palm against yours sends sparks through you, making you feel like a stupid high schooler. He's still smiling, which makes it even harder to ignore. You suppose he's used to his life being threatened, used to targeted attacks, and that's how he's so calm after the ambush. Unless the starry look in his eyes speaks of an oncoming concussion.

He doesn't flinch once as you disinfect his scrapes and cuts. You're glad there's no glass to be picked out of the wounds. He watches everything you do quietly, and you find yourself having to remind yourself to breathe occasionally. It's new to be this close to him, and you don't hate it – not in the slightest. Most of his wounds are superficial, thanks to the bullet proof glass, and once you've applied coverings to the cuts on his hands, you're all finished. When you go to move the lamp away, you notice that his face has changed. He looks drained now, all his earlier charm and blasé attitude abandoned, maybe a little paler than usual even under the warm light, and you wonder if he's starting to feel the effects of the ordeal.

“I'll get you some water,” you tell him. Before you can move away, you feel his fingers softly grasp your hand. Your eyes come back to his face in surprise.

“Wait,” he says, a little weakly. His eyes are looking away from you, his brow quirked as though he's trying to figure something out. “I'm fine. Can you- can you just…”

There's only been one other time he's not been sure of his words before, and he'd been through something rough then, too. Something inside you begins to warm up and slowly melt as you realise that Yeonjun is not as unbothered on the inside as he plays on the outside. He may be tough, but he's not invincible. He may have had this kind of attack on his life before, he might even be used to it or expect it, but his body still undergoes the shock, even if it’s a delayed reaction.

His eyebrows are still slightly furrowed as he looks up at you. Without words and with the gentlest, smallest tug at your hand which you may not have noticed in another circumstance, which could probably have been played off as nothing if it had been rejected, he asks you to stay. You can't hide the smile that twitches at your lips. With something that feels like courage coursing through you, you step towards him. Turning slightly, you set yourself down on his lap and feel him relax. His arm winds around you to keep you snug to him and you lean your head onto his shoulder, getting a breath of expensive cologne. He sighs deeply before breathing evenly, dropping into a deep rest.

You're content like this, though you never imagined being this close to him, glad that he's resting when he clearly needs it, and proud that you could help. If this is how you can protect him physically, even if it's only in this small way, you'll take it. Though, in your head you've already begun thinking through methods of retaliation to whichever rival faction made this attempt on his life.

[b3achysurfur]

If we notice in the webtoon, Taylor and Ben are the only ones who have not been seriously injured...

Aiden was crushed

Tyler was impaled

Ashlyn had a concussion

Logan ended up with a big cut on his side

Do you think something worse could happen to Taylor and Ben?

I think eventually all of them will face some sort of serious injury, so I highly doubt Ben and Taylor will be safe. I think ashlyn and Logan will also get more deadly wounds soon (hope Logan is first in line 🙏)

But I do find it interesting that they are the only two unharmed. Especially since they had a mini romance going on in S1. awwww I miss them 😢

Whats also interesting is how impulsive, destructive, and agressive Taylor has been lately as well as her increased screentime 😈

We’ve also unfortunately seen Logan get a lot of panels lately as well. And idk if u guys remember S1 but Tyler, ashlyn, and Aiden were the ones who got a lot of attention. But now that Tyler and Aiden are out , the attention has shifted to Taylor and Logan. But not Ben!!!!! (I want more Ben screentime, fuck Logan no body gaf what’s going on with him 😒 tell me ab Benny boy NOOOWWWW!!!!!!)

my point is Taylor or Logan may be the next to experience a major event. They’ve also been the ones exhibiting the most “phantom traits” , MOSTLY Taylor tho. also there’s a few other things that point to Taylor being in harms way very soon.

but basically the signs are telling me Taylor is gonna go through smth much worse than what’s happening rn. Back to Taylor and Ben’s relationship tho. Ben always tries to give back to things that treat him well, idrk how to word it. In S1 Taylor is very considerate of the whole group, but there are a few instances where she focuses on him.

in S2, ben mirrors this act by physically protecting her and attempting to comfort her to the best of his abilities

taylor leans into this comfort and support, even if it’s only by a little. taylor needs people, and ben can easily become her person. they both value their family and friends a lot and are willing to put their lives on the line/distance themselves if it means protecting them. they both have lost someone who has guided them out of a dark time in their life to the phantom dimension. they both are kind hearted people who are gentle. they are both a pea to someone’s pod (Aiden and Ben, Taylor and Tyler). they understand each other better than anyone else.

Ben cares about Taylor a lot. we don’t get scenes of them like we do with aidlyn anymore, but we do get little snippets. he is willing to protect her , even if it puts himself at risk. HE COVERED HER COMPLETELY WITH HIMSELF!!! HE DIDNT EVEN COVER HIS HEAD OR ANYTHINGG IGHWHEHA!!??? He had been holding her in place ever since the phantom had started chasing them. HE CARES SM IT HURTS ME.

ben has been such a neglected character, but I don’t think this was for no reason. I believe Ben’s time will come. I was honestly expecting a reaction out of him when Aiden ‘died’ but we got aidlyn so idrc 😈🙏. anyways a lot of people want to see Ben tweak AND I DO TOO!!! but you also have to remember, him not getting mad and bearing with the situation shows how much he has grown from his past. Ben has intense anger issues that he’s HEAVILY ashamed of. keeping himself in check is already hard enough with day to day triggers, but add his new phantom situation onto that? mans is STRUGGLING, but since it’s in silence no one ever talks ab it 🙁 we’ve seen Tyler crack under this pressure, Logan getting madder, and taylor has gotten angrier too! ashlyn is more stressed and tired than angry, and Aiden is having fun most of the time. but Ben? he’s been trying his absolute hardest to not flip out.

so that combined with his affection for tay, if something bad really does happen to her, I do believe it will be his final straw. There’s only so much self control a 14 year old has (even though most adults would’ve went insane by now). Whether Taylor turns into a phantom or she gets injuries/dies, it will hit Ben HARD. Tyler will also be affected, but I really hope it doesn’t overshadow Ben. Losing Taylor would mean Ben wasn’t able to protect her like he wanted to and after Aiden also got hurt, I don’t think he would be able to take it. I think it’ll also extremely upset him when he finds out his family got caught in the crossfire of the kidnapping.

I was thinking about it, and we might actually see ben use his voice out of desperation. I really hope we don’t, bc I think ben not being verbal is nice representation, it’s so important to his character, and I love seeing how ben expresses himself without words. but I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if he used it to call out to someone. The way this scene (⬇️⬇️) is worded is like, “he CAN (might even) talk, he just doesn’t WANT (have a reason) too”. i really hope he doesn’t, but it’s definitely a possibility 😢 especially if we get a ben centered arc that’s caused by his anger and the loss he’s experienced.

All in all, I don’t think Ben be the next one to be injuried really, but I do think Taylor will. And Taylor getting hurt will finally open up a arc centered around/that includes ben 🙏

hope red gives us the craziest angst we've ever seen for them two and then kills Logan 😛

(sorry for rambling sm 😓 I tried to shorten it but now i feel like some parts don’t make sense. UGH WTV!!! I’m very passionate about Ben and the affects Taylor has had on him 😒)

[mindhealing]

Dynamics Of The Sexes!

The dynamics of each sex must be adhered to if a relationship is to achieve it's goal and full potential. A man in a relationship with a woman may find it a bit of a challenge to connect with her, and in some instances may not even know how to connect with a woman, to support and nurture her, to love and care for her in a way that strengthens and uphold the bond they share. You may struggle with balancing your masculine energy and strength, instinct and power, nit knowing at first how to balance them in the relationship but eventually you will figure it out. You are often placed in a position where you are expected to be the hunter, predatory and strong, going after the one who has caught your fancy and who you have eyes for, be the provider for your woman and eventually your family as it grows, you are also expected to be the protector of your family and the leader and head of your household. You are told that you will always be needed by your woman and kids, and are expected to be there and take up the mantle when it is expected, and in that your self esteem and self confidence grows knowing that you are up to the task of whatever is expected of you.

So how can you love your woman and still feel like a man? How do you make sure that the dynamics truly play out in your relationship and love connection, so that your relationship not only stands the test of time but also grows and strengthen the bond between the two of you? How do you make sure to do what's needful and expected of you, even when you are too tired or when you aren't in the mood? The answer to these questions are surprisingly simple - when you no longer accept what you have  been told and programmed to do and become by society and the world at large. You would rather believe in independent male and female roles in the relationship, and seeing her as your equal partner in life, in all circumstances and under all conditions of life. You start to understand her and see her unique equalities, strength and weaknesses, you admire her patience and preseverence, courage and endurance in moving with life and life experiences. You understand all she gives and sacrifices for the relationship and love connection, giving her the understanding, attention and care she deserves, as you realize that she is giving it her best shot the same way as you are giving it your best short too. She is in no way and manner the weak female the society and the world paints her to be, and her faith and courage in the face of challenging situations and conditions prove the innate and salient talents that she has.

She had to stand up for herself and prove to everyone her right to live the way she wants to live her life, and not be criticized nor condemned for her choice. She shouldn't be judged for deciding to be who she is unapologetically, that is absolutely her right and privilege. She chose the life that she wants, lives life how she wants to and does only what she wants. Her life is hers to live and do as she wants, and do whatever makes her happy and contented. She doesn't have to be told what to do, how to do it, she doesn't need to know how to feel, neither does she need anyone's permission to be her best version or to decide the right path for her future and chart the trajectory of her life and life experiences. She is free and happy being herself and doesn't see the need to be otherwise. If you really love her, then you will support her and let her be her authentic self, so that she always feels that way and you will have an equal partner by your side, to chart the course of an amazing life and future together. You shouldn't see her as the weak partner she is painted, you know the strength and power within her that only you can see and know about her. So decide to let life be what it will be, rather than have society and the world tell you how to live your life and conduct your affairs and the affairs of your household.

Trust, understanding and mutual respect unlocks the door to her heart and the goodness within her, society and the world may think and say otherwise, but you know the truth about her because you can see what others cannot see about her. Showing up for her and her needs, desires and wants consistently, will keep that door open for you. The more you show her trust and understanding, the more she will want to reward that trust of yours with one of her one. So forget the perceived and so called dynamics the society and the world talk and preach about. Every woman isn't the same, the same way every man isn't the same. You have to find out the qualities that your partner or mate has and decide if you can work it them, grow and evolve together or if you can't and have to leave and seek the one that vibrates same energy frequency as you do, same character, attitude and behavior you seek and same personality as you want and desire. The dynamics of the sexes in a true relationship is the smooth blend and synergy of both partners coming together to form a powerful love connection starting with the strong initial physical attraction that brought them together in the first place, and then grows into a wonderful partnership where they age gracefully together, helping each other grow and evolve and become the best version of themselves, while wrapped in the cocoon of love and affection they have for each other.

A loving relationship, love connection or partnership, whatever type you are involved in, isn't based on one sided love, or one partner being dependent on the other, neither is it based on one partner controlling the other as the so called "man of the house or head of the family", and it definitely is not based on lies and deception, because truth always rise to the surface eventually, and becomes evident sooner than planned for those caught up in a web of deceit and lies. The true dynamics is built on a foundation of mutual love and affection, trust and understanding and respect for each other. A strong woman definitely wants to be with a strong man and vice versa. In a true dynamic relationship and love connection, neither partner live in fear because there is no worry that the other is any thing but honest and loyal, so they live in love and truth. There is no room for insecurity and cheating by either partner, how can this be when they are a vibrational match and equals. The only way cheating comes into the picture is when one partner is deceitful with and to the other, and has ulterior motive and a hidden agenda but is pretending to be loving.

If either partner attracts someone like the above, it's back to the drawing board for them, because it means there is either an unhealed part in them or the wound and scars of childhood haven't really been dealt with and discarded, so the partner they attracted is a wake-up call to reexamine themselves, and what's happening in their life and life experiences. So if you want to love a real woman, an independent and strong woman, then you need to be an independent and strong man equally, remember that "Like attracts like" and that you "Attract what you are and not who you are", it cannot be any other way and that's the real dynamics of the sexes. A man who is not afraid of being vulnerable and open with his feelings and emotions, of letting his partner see his raw emotions and tears, and not being ashamed to break down in front of her and cry when the need be, is indeed a true man and a rare gem. He is also confident enough to let her come to him when she wants him, no matter how long it takes especially when she is processing her own feelings and emotions, the same way she gives him space to process his. Then the mutual need and love, want and desire that they have for each other, eventually propels them back into each other's arms and life.

More to come!

[roguephenon]

Thank you for going along with every comment I send in! I am always worried about coming off too strong so I’m glad that I’m allowed to have a lot of free reign in this instance. With that said, I just realised that I forgot to add this entire part but here it is!!

To add to what I said in my previous ask and at the risk of sounding like the most basic cartoon lover ever…I especially loved the 3/4 moments, ok? I love how they were able to figure something out thru a lot of trial and error by the time Nigel came back. I love how almost everyone is kinda attuned or aware of the very palpable Something that’s been going on between them for years. 

Another thing that I especially love is that you’re rlly good at portraying them as two people navigating their first relationship together and it isn’t perfect! She doesn’t share everything with him…maybe because her new role makes her hesitant to rely on people?? And he feels genuinely insecure because literally everyone is like “girl…dump him/she is way out of your league”. He just wants to be seen as capable enough to help and she needs the validation that she’s doing alright. But they do try their best anyways! 

And OUGHH the way they’re both stubborn when it comes to each other. Like his refusal to forget her?? And her refusal to give up on him?? The way both of these things help move the plot in some way. Like yea if I were Nigel, I’d also drop the rules to plan a jailbreak. Heck, I’d do it a chapter earlier ☝️. I especially like how affectionate and dorky they are together like yeah he’d drink tea for her and yeah they’d also do a whole epic duo fight in the form of a dance…oh you definitely cooked with that…one of my absolute fave scenes…

Speaking of favorite scenes…I gotta give a special mention to the confession scene in chapter 28 because how could I not…like years of them doing the whole will they/won’t they dance and them having this secret relationship within the narrative and him setting aside all his bluster and pride to proclaim his love at the lowest hour, mid battle?! I was so invested even at 2 am dude. Her immediately locking in after that… Him wanting to be better because of her belief that she can OUGHHH. Like these two have been underestimated by everyone in universe so it always meant a lot to me that they both grow into people who subverted those expectations. 

Lastly, while I do appreciate these prominent moments, what really got to me the most, emotionally, was the quiet stuff which is ironic cuz these two have never been any sort of quiet haha. But yea, the scenes leading up to their joint decommissioning were so peak. Him refusing it for her and eventually doing it WITH her. Her reassuring him and how as she matured, she realised that she didn’t need all that overt displays of affection, especially if he’s not comfortable with it cuz she gets It. Him wanting to go thru it anyways cuz he feels like she deserves it. AND their cute banter as they wait for the inevitable with the callbacks and everything ESPECIALLY the callback from operation cats? I was near tears😭. I 100% believe that they would’ve found each other again if (REDACTED) didnt happen. 

Overall, you were not only able to portray the pair we all knew and loved but you did it in a way to show why it would work out very well. It’s the type of love you grow into, forward, and together. Grow As We Go by Ben Platt definitely suits them. 

PS. How was it for you to write them this way? And I know it’s already implied but the things I’d do for the directors cut of their actual love confession 🙏. 

Aw, don’t be afraid to run that risk! Like what you like! There’s no shame in it, especially with a ship like this. Take it from me!

I’m happy to hear you liked their portrayal here. I definitely wanted to show two people growing into their first relationship. I’m a sucker for the childhood sweethearts trope. It’s not perfect, but nothing truly is. That’s why I took care to show the messy as well.

I think the quiet moments should hit hard and loud in terms of emotional narrative too, so I’m glad it invoked a strong reaction as that was the intent haha.

Writing them this way was fun and satisfying for me. Mostly, I definitely wanted to see this relationship from the developing standpoint; it’s why the story starts with them together and the “first” confession isn’t given much focus.

It’s also why, technically, there is no director’s cut of the first love confession: because the one you see in 28 IS the actual one. It’s the real one, the one that matters.