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#(once i get my silly social anxiety to shut up :3)
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good morning!! <3
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didyoulookforme · 18 days
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matty sending you dirty photos, please!
this is stylist au coded :)
there is this night when both of you are already in your bunks because it’s way too late and everyone is sleeping around you. matty keeps texting because he knows both of you have bad insomnia, so he just wants some company. it is mostly small talk, him chatting about things he messed up during the gig, you admitting how you still can’t believe you’re on tour with them, etc etc.
the next alert pops up on your phone with an “image attached” message, so you click it and it’s a dimly lit photo of matty lying down on his bunk, doing a motion as if he’s blowing you a kiss. “happy to have you here, darlin.” it’s difficult to not focus on how beautiful he is, disheveled curls all over his pillow, your gold chain around his neck. makes you smile to know he doesn’t even take it off when you sleep. “still want my necklace back… but you’re cute <3”
you snap a photo of yourself and hit send, not really thinking much of it. “you’re the pretty one here, love… also, nice shirt ;)” you’re confused as to why he would mention that, given that you usually sleep topless (buses tend to get hot and stuffy). then it clicks, taking a look at the photo you sent and instantly realize that you could see your shoulders and it’s clear you’re not wearing anything underneath. you feel your face grow warm, thankful that no one’s around to notice.
“shut up, matty”
“what? not lying. just wish i could see you”
“outta luck tonight, then!”
he sends another photo, this time of him mock frowning, a hand over his bare chest partly covering that tattoo you’ve now committed to memory.
“you’re breaking my heart here :(“
as you type your phone buzzes once again.
“what if i go first..?”
“pardon?”
“you know what i mean, love”
and you obviously did, you just weren’t sure if you’d be able to handle possibly getting a dick pic from him, fully aware that he’s just meters away from you doing so.
“yes or no?”
you type and delete several messages before settling on a short “yes.” as soon as you hit send, you turn the screen off and hide the device under your pillow, feeling a mix of anxiety and uncertainty as you wait. finally the phone vibrates and you swear your fingers move on their own accord, fumbling to open the screen.
it’s a photo of him. hand over his boxers, chipped polish dark like the material, long fingers grabbing his cock, only the tip visible and his thumb resting on the slit.
“your turn ;)”
fuck fuck fuck
what now?
you fumble in the small space to take a photo of your tits, realizing that the only way to do so is by showing part of your face. then you get an idea. you raise the camera, place your left hand over your mouth and snap a few frames. once you’re happy, you send it over hoping that you didn’t leave him waiting too long.
“wish it were your fingers instead…”
you can’t help but smile, feeling like a silly teenager all over again, sending photos to your grade 11 crush.
“promise they’ll be next time, sweetheart”
then the next photo arrives. the calvin klein boxers are nowhere to be seen, his dick hard again this abdomen, fingers loosely resting over his flower tattoo, beads of precum now clearly dripping from the tip.
if it were socially acceptable, that photo would be your lock screen <3
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puppetsoftomorrow · 10 months
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hey uh... is this thing on?
so i'm back? maybe? weird ramble under the cut
so... it's been 18 months.
lots has happened, which you might know if you followed me on twitter before i bowed outta there lol. i got engaged, i got a cat, i'm converting to judaism. i moved house. i'm doing fine <3
and i've really missed legends?
i haven't watched it since cancellation, not a jot, and i watched a lot of other shows since, and i tried branching out original writing, but i had the inspiration to write some more fanfic a few months ago and i've got it again now, and i just - i really miss legends.
i left tumblr one month to the day after cancellation because, frankly, tumblr was giving me massive amounts of anxiety. i worried Constantly about getting called out or getting misinterpreted - which was made 200% worse at the end of s7 because the baby and the renewal campaign got kind of divisive, and i knew i was going to have to quit for my own mental health, so ... i did. and it was a really good decision.
but all other social media just seems ... not for me, and i miss the community on here, and i miss reblogging gifsets and making my little textposts and coming up with silly headcanons, so - i'm back
and it's no secret that - i mean the fandom is gone, right? not totally - and i'm so excited to see everyone who's here - but there just aren't as many people, and that gives me a sense of peace. it doesn't feel so high stakes anymore. and the renewal campaign is over, so that's not something i worry about anymore.
i'm setting myself some boundaries. 1 - if this becomes another source of anxiety for me, i'm leaving lol. 2 - i'm shutting my ask box whenever i want, and i'm not answering asks if i don't want to. 3 - i'm moving this away from being a totally legends blog, bcos there's other good tv shows lmao. 4 - i'm going to be talking more about original writing. fanfiction is still really fun for me, but i want to do Something original, just once in my life.
anyway, if you've made it this far - hello!! i'm excited to see you!!
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little-bunny-in-space · 3 months
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hiiii!! for the matchup trade:
so just for the basic info, I'm pretty short, 5'3", with short brown hair, and hazel eyes 👁👁 I'm an Aries, INFP (after I retook the test recently) kinda a little chubby
I'm pretty shy when I first meet someone, but not in like the cutesy way. It's more like "waaaaa I'm gonna fuck this interaction up and they're gonna hate me forever". I very much have social anxiety, y'know? my brother keeps teasing me about it (in the light hearted way) 😭 I'm also very autistic, very ADHD Very sensitive RSD. i'm also kinda sarcastic, kinda mouthy. I can never SHUT UP
I care for my people very aggressively. If I decide you're my friend, you're MINE. Nobody is allowed to mess with you, and if I find out someone is, they're gonna get it. And once I've decided you're my friend, you're my family now.
and I am a HUGE family person. I love my family. I have so many siblings and cousins and aunts and uncles and I always try to make it a point to let them know that I love them. And also maybe i'd like kids one day, who knows 👁👁 I know. I want kids one day, but i'd prefer I get the situation with my baby sister situated first.
My favorite love languages is physical touch and quality time. Like, I just want to be someone's first choice, y'know? I'm the first person they think of when they wanna hang out. I also LOVE cuddles and hugs and just touching people (in the least weird way possible). But the way that I actually show my love is through gift giving!!!! I love giving people things! sentimental things, or practical things, doesn't even matter. As long as you have a little something to remember me by, I want you to have it.
I don't have, like, a specific style that I stick to. I prefer to stay comfortable usually, so I stay in sweats and a t-shirt or tights and tanks. but when I do feel like dressing up, i'll usually do any style that I feel like. something sweet, or something sexy. It really depends on my mood.
omg speaking of clothes I LOVE stealing peoples clothes. It's also another part of my love language. I steal my dad's clothes, my brothers give me their clothes they don't want anymore, my other sibling and I share clothes since we're the relatively the same size.
anyway that's uhhh me {:) <3
I have made my decision! For Part 4, I match you with-
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Josuke Higashikata!
Your personalities meld together really well! You would so be best friends!
You both have the same sort of sarcastic, mouthy attitude, but not in a jerkass way- more in a loving, silly way! But if you both hate someone equally, that person's feelings are going to be DEMOLISHED
You're both autistic and ADHD together. So cute.
Josuke is the more extroverted part to your introvertedness. Where you have social anxiety, he is the one to step out and speak for you if need be. Definitely the "They asked for no pickles." in your relationship. Where he is the golden retriever, you are the quiet cat underneath his feet.
Another thing you have in common is your love and dedication for your friends and family. He admires that about you, and you share the aggressive loyalty you have for the people you love!
Def vibes with physical touch, I feel he'd always try to hold you hand or be around you. I always see Josuke as a bit of a puppy dog, and would always love to lay on your chest and whine for more cuddles.
Also, he cherishes every gift you'd give him, from the tiniest everyday gift of something silly to the most lavish presents. He has a place in his room for the stuff you've given him. He would also wear any article of clothing you'd give him. I imagine you having cheesy cute matching shirts. His says "If found, return me to most beautiful person." and yours says "I am beautiful person" or something like that.
LOVES how you look in his shirts!!! And thinks it is so cute when you sleep in them. Definitely has pics in his phone of you falling asleep in his jackets.
Will definitely look over your shoulder and watch you write, every once in a while giving input or saying what a great job you are doing! "Oh my God... Harper, that is so freaking sick!"
I feel you and Rohan would get along as friends in writing ability, and might write or talk about ideas together, in which Josuke may get a bit jealous in a cute way.
Adores you more than anyone in the world. If anyone gets too close, or makes you uncomfortable, Josuke will annihilate them. With NO mercy. --------------------------------------------------------------------------
And! For Part 5, I choose-
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Bruno Bucciarati!
This may seem unexpected, but after thinking about it. Perfect
You both have an extremely kind and dedicated demeanor towards those you care about!
You and Bucciarati both have many things in common, and a common goal. He is righteous and kind, and the most important thing to him is loyalty to his family and friends. He is honorable and compassionate and will sacrifice himself to uphold those values- and he sees you would be willing to do the same.
Meeting you, he realized you both have the same resolve, same outlook, and same loyalty, to the group and most importantly, to eachother. You're both family oriented and he LOVES that.
Affection wise Bruno is slow and sweet. He enjoys physical affection just as much as you do, probably more. The thing is, Bruno loves giving gifts more than receiving them. Of course you are getting the most amazing and lavish gifts possible, he loves to spoil you! But in all reality, the times when you get to be alone, whether in a little restaurant somewhere or after a hard-fought battle, he just loves existing with you, and getting to see your passion and resolve grow stronger with every minute you are together.
He does keep the small things you give him in his pockets on missions. <3
I feel Bruno is very emotionally intelligent and picks up on the social cues when you get anxious. But he is sure to never speak over you. He always reassures you and builds your confidence. "Amore mio, you know how strong you are. Do not be afraid to speak your truth."
He very much appreciates the quieter things and both of your more introverted personalities work well together.
He is so incredibly patient and loves just to hear you talk about anything- whatever special interest or thing you've learned- he's very attentive.
(Also. thinks you look sexy in his jacket. the boob window is hot af)
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trashyswitch · 3 years
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Hangout Time
Nen, Sebastian and Sam are hanging out together! Silliness ensues.
This fanfic is for @agarus-fallen-lershal. I hope you enjoy this!
Nen, Sebastian and Sam were playing video games in the house together. Nen was sitting between the two boys, so that he could enjoy sitting beside both of them at once. “Aah! That's the third time, Sebastian!” Sam growled.
“Sorry...can’t help it if I’m good at a racing game.” Sebastian teased. “You just need to catch up to my level.”
“Second’s not that bad.” Nen said next. “Second’s good, but it’s not first.” Sebastian joked. “Plus, it’s not my fault Sam chose the heaviest game character.”
“True...the fact that he got second with him is quite impressive.” Nen mentioned.
“Oh shut up you two!” Sam reacted, pushing Nen into Sebastian.
Sebastian laughed as he was bonked into by the pinball that was Nen.
“At least you didn’t get fifth.” Nen mentioned, pointing to himself.
“Yeah…” Sam muttered.
“One more round?” Nen asked.
“Make it three, then it’s a deal.” Sebastian offered.
“Oh, you’re on, smoke breath!” Sam declared.
Nen rolled his eyes and smiled. “Deal.”
Three rounds came and went. And much to everyone’s surprise: Nen won all 3 of the races! Talk about a hatrick!
“See ya down here, losers~” Nen teased as he laid back on the ground.
Sam and Sebastian exchanged looks of mischief, and nodded their heads.
“Hey Nen:” Sebastian asked.
“Mm hm?” Nen replied.
“We wanna celebrate your triple victory with a special tradition we call: The Triple S. Or: The Sam & Sebby special.” Sam teased.
“What did I tell you about using that nickname?” Sebastian asked.
“Come on...it sounds cooler.” Sam told him.
Nen giggled. “And what’s the special?” He asked.
Sebastian and Sam smirked between each other.
“Is it pizza?!” Nen asked, growing excited.
Sebastian cracked his knuckles and started skittering his fingers on Nen’s sides.
Nen bursted out laughing. “OHOHOHOHO! IHIHI SEHEHEHEHEHE!”
“Yup! You bet it is!” Sam lifted his arm up and started skittering his fingers on Nen’s open armpit. “EEHEHEHEHEHE! GUHUHUYS!” Nen laughed.
“Yeeeeess?” Sam teased.
“STAHAHAHAP!” Nen ordered.
“Now why would we do that when you clearly love it?” Sebastian teased.
“Wait, he likes this?” Sam reacted.
“Yes, he very much does. He told me once.” Sebastian explained. “DIHIHIHID NOHOHOHOT!” Nen yelled.
“Did so! He told me while we were on the beach in the rain! It was while I was telling him about some of my social anxieties.” Sebastian told him.
“Oh wow! Good to know!” Sam reacted.
“THIHIHIS IHIHIS UHUHUNFAHAHAHAIR!” Nen laughed.
“Unfair- Do you even HEAR YOURSELF?! What’s unfair is the fact that you won 3 games in a row!” Sam reacted.
“Yeah! What he said!” Sebastian replied.
“NOHOHOHOHOHO!” Nen begged as he squirmed and wiggled around in their grasp. “Uh, look at the TV! Nen-your-biznu, 1st place.”
Nen howled with laughter...but it wasn’t because of the pun, no no…
It was because Sebastian had found his belly button!
“Ooooh...I see a giggly button that hasn’t been tickled yet.” Sebastian teased.
“NAHAHAHAT THEHEHEHERE! PLEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHA!” He cackled loudly, absolutely losing his mind. “Awww, is poor Nenny too ticklish for his own good?” Sam teased.
“IHIHI’LL GEHEHEHET YOHOHOU BAHAHACK FOHOHOR THIHIHIHIS!” Nen swore upon his soul. “Oh you will, will you?” Sam teased.
“Heh...I doubt that.” Sebastian replied.
“STAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” He begged.
“Alright, alright. The special is over.” Sebastian decided.
“Aww...but I wanted to continue…” He whined.
“I know...but Nen needs a break.” He told him.
Nen was all giggly and squirmy after being tickled. The truth was, he wanted them to tickle him for longer. But...He didn’t wanna bother them…
He was too busy focusing on his feelings when he noticed that Sam was looking at him curiously. “You okay?”
“Hm?” He asked. “Oh…” Nen muttered. He must’ve been dozing off…
“I think I know what he wants…” Sebastian said as he started tickling Nen’s belly button.
“EEEHEHEHEHEHEHE!” Nen laughed, flopping onto the ground like a ragdoll. “Wow! That was a Christmas Shopper Simulator-type flop!” Sebastian laughed.
“Wahahahas nohohot, cheheheater.” He giggled as the surrounding belly was tickled lightly.
“Oh that’s it-” Sebastian leaned forward and blew a big raspberry onto Nen’s belly button.
Nen squealed and screamed! “AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AAAHAHAHAHAHA- NOHOHOHOHOHO!” Nen cackled.
“Yes, meanie!” Sam replied, tickling his neck.
“EEHEHEHEHEheheheheheeeee!” Nen’s laughter lessened to giggles.
“Awww, giggly boy!” Sam teased as he tickled the back of his neck.
“HEhehehehehehehe! Yahahahahay!” Nen leaned into the tickles and scrunched his shoulders.
“He really does like it!” Sam reacted.
“I told you!” Sebastian reacted.
“Shuhuhuhut uhuhuhup, yohohohou twohohoho!” Nen ordered.
“Now why would we do that?” Sam asked.
“Behehecahahause you lohohove mehehe?” Nen asked.
“Of course we love you!” Sam reacted.
“That’s exactly why we’re tickling you.” Sebastian told him.
“Ohohohoh…” Nen giggled.
“So tell us: What would you like? More tickles or more gaming?” Sebastian asked.
Nen thought for a moment, though it was a little hard thinking with Sam tickling his neck at the same time. “Ihihihi wahahant mohohohore plehehease.” Nen finally admitted.
“More? More what?” Sebastian asked.
“TIHIHIHICKLEHEHES!” Nen yelled back.
“Well looky here...A whole new Nen has hopped out of its cage.” Sam reacted.
More like a silly Nen that’s been hiding…” Sebastian added.
“Juhuhust stahahahart- OHOHOHO GEEEEEHEHEHEHEHEHEEZ!” Nen bursted out laughing as his belly button was tickled with a pinky...Just a pinky!
“AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! YOHOHOHOU’RE SOHOHO MEHEHEHEHEAN!” Nen yelled.
“Oh I know.” Sebastian muttered with a grin on his face.
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahaha!” Nen kept on laughing.
“Wow! Not even a word, Nenny? Just laughing?” Sam reacted.
Nen nodded his head as a little blush started to show itself onto his face.
“Ooooh! I see a bluuuush~” Sam teased.
“SHUHUHUT UHUHUP!” Nen shouted.
Sam and Sebastian both gasped. “Now where did that language come from?” Sam asked.
“I have no idea.” Sebastian replied.
“HAHAHAHAHAhahahaha!” Nen was, as you could guess, still laughing. “And laughing at us?! How rude!” Sam reacted.
“So rude.” Sebastian added.
“We’re gonna make you pay for that. Aren’t we, Sebby?” Sam declared.
“What have I told you abo-”
“RASPBERRY ATTACK!” Sam blew a big raspberry onto Nen’s belly to get him back.
“EEEEEEHEHEHEHEEEEE!” Nen squeaked like a mouse and completely lost all composure. “STAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!”
“Naaaah, you don’t really want us to stop...you’re just saying ‘Stop’ because it’s a nervous tick!” Sam reacted.
“Yeah…We’ll stop when we want to stop.” Sebastian told him.
“Don’t worry about it! We’ll give you all the tickles you want.” Sam said.
“Guaranteed.” Sebastian told him as well.
Nen giggled as his belly was tickled all over again. This tickling lasted for a long while, before the boys officially stopped to give Nen a break. Nen happily took some water from the boys and expressed his gratitude towards the both of them.
“Thank you...for everything, you two.” Nen told them.
“No prob.” Sebastian replied.
“Not a problem, my ticklish boyfriend.” Sam replied, tickling his chin.
Nen giggled and curled his neck down. “Hehehehey!” He giggled.
“Giggle, my little rockstar!” Sam teased.
“Don’t you mean ‘our’?” Sebastian asked.
“Yeah, I mean our.” Sam replied.
And giggle like a baby, Nen certainly did. And it was the cutest little giggle Sam and Sebastian had ever heard! And the boys cherished that giggle forever.
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dirt-cup-draco · 4 years
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Fred x Reader- Ease My Mind
can you do fred weasley & the love language of touch, if that is something that you do?
a/n: he is darling and coming right up <3 ALSO, Important note! I switched phones and forgot to save some of my notes so if you were on my taglist for my fics please send me an ask or dm! I will try to put down those I remember but I may forget a few 
Your shoulders tensed immediately as you walked through the doors of the joke shop. The melodic ringing of the bell attached to the brightly colored wooden frame was drowned out by the sound of kids laughing and parents scolding. Fireworks erupted somewhere above as your eye caught a glimmer of ash and magic descending onto the glossy wooden floors. 
It wasn’t that you were uncomfortable in the shop. You had long since become used to the jarring noise upon entering and it had stopped bothering you, your social anxieties overcome. Yet you were nearly certain it was because every shelf and sound and smell reminded you of the man you loved most. His heart and his soul emanated from every nook and cranny.
What made the hair on the back of your neck raise and your palms begin to sweat was the look of distress on George’s face as you entered, his attention immediately going to you. His lips were in a thin line, the wrinkles at the corners of his eyes more pronounced by the bags that lay just underneath his eyelashes and colored the very tips of his cheeks a dull gray. Your heart was stuck in your chest as he plastered on a grin that was so forced it made your own jaw ache as he dodged past another pleased customer. 
“Where is he?” You asked, stomach tied in knots and George shook his head, a guilty look on his face. 
“We were stocking this morning and I was goofing off-”
 You nearly let out a snort but stopped yourself as you noticed the strained expression on your dearly beloved’s brother’s face. 
“-accidentally spooked him and he stumbled down two or three steps on the ladder and the box he was holding came crashing down around him. He’s just barely started going ‘round without his cane and he’s’ frustrated with himself I think and with how the merchandise came down around him...” 
George trailed off and you gave him a sympathetic smile, reaching out to squeeze his hand as a group of girls ran around your legs in search for the coveted love potions, one hollering about she would never be as silly as her friends and was only looking out for them. She reminded you of yourself when you had first met the twins. 
“Georgie, it’s not your fault,” You promised as he struggled to meet your eyes. You knew from George’s words that it was likely Fred had been forced back into the past and was seeking comfort in the safety of his bedroom in an attempt to ground himself and stay in the present. “I’ll go see him,” 
George’s slouched shoulders seemed a bit less heavy with your promise and he gave you a short nod, going to help the lonesome cashier who was overwhelmed with a line wrapping around the place. You gave your near brother in-law a thumbs up and then made your way to the far reaches of the store so you could begin your ascent into the twins’ apartment. 
You knew there would be bad days and good days but for Fred’s sake you had hoped that the good would outweigh the bad. At first they had, there was the thrill of finally having no more fear of Voldemort even if his dark forces were still tucked into dark corners. Things had been looking up and everyone was just happy to be alive, yet as the days and weeks flew by it seemed that the horrors of war would be sticking around long after the Dark Lord’s defeat. 
The apartment was colder than usual and Fred wasn’t to be found in the kitchen or the sitting area. There was no music playing to fill the silence nor was there a cup of tea in sight. If it wasn’t for the cleanliness of the place you would’ve wondered if it was inhabited. 
You forced your foot falls to resonate against the flooring louder than usual to give your longtime boyfriend some warning as to your presence yet you kept your knock gentle as you tapped a melody against his door, hand frozen on the doorknob. 
“Fred, love, it’s me,” You called out. “May I come in?” 
The shuffling of socked feet paused momentarily and then the doorknob was twisting against your palm and the door was pulled away from you. Fred poked his head out from behind the door and you gave him a bright smile. Even under such circumstances you couldn’t help but be delighted at the sight of him- especially when you saw the stony expression on his face fall away as he locked eyes with you. 
“Darling,” He greeted, voice croaky from misuse all afternoon. He looked more tired than George and you realized that the younger twin must have been up caring for Fred all night. You regretted going out with Hermione. 
You shouldered your way into the bedroom and took Fred’s hands into yours after he closed the door securely behind you and locked it for peace of mind. You knew he didn’t fear someone coming for him as much as he feared the uncontrollability of an unlocked door. He wasn’t willing to let much into his space and you felt a swell of honor in your chest as you thought about the ease at which he let you in. 
“Sit with me?” You asked, squeezing his hands as his eyes searched yours- his frown not yet gone but the grim glaze over his eyes had dropped away and he was trying to relax for you. Fred’s glance broke away and he stared at a spot on the floor, just behind you. 
“I don’t want to be still,” He mentioned softly, like the admission made him weak somehow. 
“How long have you been pacing?” You had to ask, hands falling away from his to settle on his hips and he shrugged. 
“Since before we opened shop,” 
“Have you eaten?” 
“We can later,” 
Your heart twisted painfully in your chest as Fred couldn’t meet your eyes. You could tell guilt was chewing away at him and you couldn’t stand to see him struggling so much. If you could take his pain from him you would without a second beat. 
“Would you let me go grab you something? Or maybe we could take a walk to that pub you like,” You offered, trying to give him the freedom to choose and think on what he would be most comfortable with yet you hoped he would get something to eat as it might help him relax. Whenever he’d been upset at Hogwarts, locked away in his room, you’d snuck him hand pies and juice and he’d always brightened up considerably. 
You pulled away from him then, making a move to get him some tea, biscuits, anything. You were stalled however by his arms wrapping around your waist fiercely and pulling you to his chest with a grip that almost felt like fear. Your hands laid flat against his back and you rubbed with soothing circles as you stayed in the same spot you had been since entering his room. 
“Y/N,” He grumbled, pressing his nose against the side of your neck as he took a deep breath. You could feel the sudden pitch in his heartbeat against your own chest as he reminded himself you hadn’t left yet and you were still within his grasp. 
“What do you need Freddie?” You coaxed, reaching to tangle your fingers in his hair that had been growing out for some time now. He didn’t trust you or George with cutting it but he hadn’t been too comfortable heading to a salon when all he could see outside the shops were rubble and the clear signs that life still wasn’t back to normal.
“I-” He started but then dropped off for another heavy moment. His voice had cracked and you could feel your top growing damp as he buried his face deeper into the junction between your shoulder and neck. 
“Anything,” You promised, pulling him impossibly closer to help shield him from the challenging feelings he had swirling around in his mind. 
“M-maybe sitting would be nice, or laying down. Being close helps, just having you near is all I need,” He finally settled on and you took half a step back just to look into his watery eyes. Even when they were shining with tears his eyes were the most beautiful you’d ever seen. It wasn’t so much the color as it was the life that swam behind them. Even in his darkest times Fred Weasley was filled with beauty and life. 
“Of course,” 
You let Fred take the lead, his hand still clasped tightly with yours as he tugged you over to his bed. You noticed he was favoring his right leg, his cane discarded probably somewhere near the entrance to the apartment. Helping pull the sheets away from the bed you helped Fred settle onto his side. Once you joined him he let out a deep breath that he had been holding in. His arm found it’s place around your waist and he pulled you to his chest as he curled up tighter, smaller. He’d had struggles with claustrophobia yet he was entirely at ease with his head resting over your heart and his legs tangled with yours- barely a paper’s width between you. 
You trailed your fingers down his side affectionately, hand rubbing gentle circles against his hip and thigh knowing he was hurting from the way he sighed softly, hot breath fanning against your collarbones. Poor Freddie had been pacing too long and pushing through the pain from his injury.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t here this morning,” You apologized softly. Maybe if you’d fallen asleep with him his nightmares wouldn’t have been so vicious and his short fall from the ladder that morning wouldn’t have caused such a severe reaction.
“Don’t be, you’re here now,” Fred put your guilt to rest and snuck his hands under your shirt to rest against the warm expanse of your back. He’d always liked the contact and you were glad that you could help ground him in any small way. Your fingers brushed through his hair and you let your nails lightly scrape against the nape of his neck, a shiver going down his spine as he curled up tighter against you. 
You weren’t sure how long you two laid there in silence, hands shifting every so often to pull one another closer or to place an affectionate kiss against a forehead or nose. Your eyes had drifted shut and you weren’t sure if the both of you had drifted off for a moment or if the time was just passing comfortably. Fred’s breathing and heartrate had evened out and you were able to let out a sigh of relief. His hurts were your own and you felt such a deep peace when he was able to come back from the darkness. 
“This feels safe,” He admitted into the shared space between you, voice gentle like never before. “Thank you for easing my mind, Y/N” 
“Thank you for letting me in,” 
Fred smiled against your neck, brushing a kiss against your pulse point. You ruffled his hair and let your eyes fall shut again. Despite Fred’s need to move earlier and the loud memories playing back behind his eyelids he let himself fall into the warm embrace of sleep, nestled against the love of his life. 
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alpacaparkaseok · 4 years
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Lost & Found - 9
Pairing: Park Jimin x soulmate (oc)
Warnings: Insecurity, anxiety, abandonment
Word Count: 5.1k
a/n: this chapter is based off of the song ‘Countdowns’ by Sleeping at Last. I also consider this Jimin’s song for this series! Give it a listen! (also, Sleeping at Last has been a long time favorite band of mine and they are soooo amazing)
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Chapter 9. Countdowns
series masterlist
I awake with a distinct feeling of disbelief. Peering down at Elle’s sleeping form, I do my best to maneuver to the side of the bed without waking the pristine white cat. Grabbing my phone off the nightstand, it only takes a couple of seconds before yesterday’s conversation with Park Jaemin appears.
I stare and stare at the screen, scrolling through the light-hearted conversation until I arrive to a conclusion.
“I think I made a friend.” At my quiet utterance Elle stretches and looks at me lazily. “Well, besides you, I suppose.”
Elle rolls to her feet, plopping down on my lap and swishing her tail back and forth. I chew on my lip, checking the time at the top of the screen. It’s still absurdly early, chances are I won’t hear back from Jaemin for a few hours if I decide to text him now.
But, I think I made a friend.
I honestly can’t remember the last time I did that.
That fact alone proves too tempting as I run my fingers through Elle’s fur and snap a photo of her. Quickly captioning it, I send it off and jump out of bed, throwing my phone down on the comforter.
“There,” I grin at my confused cat. “That counts as my social interaction for the day, right?”
It isn’t until I’m in the shower and halfway through shaving my left leg that I realize just how much my newly formed friendship has influenced me. Not only has it granted me a rarely-won feeling of accomplishment, but it’s also spurred me to do something I never fully realized I had stopped in the first place.
For the first time in months - no, perhaps already a year? - I’m singing.
With a silly grin that is so at odds with the rush of tears to my eyes, I sing all the louder.
For the first time since he saw the other half of this thread floating toward him on a phantom breeze, freshly cut, Jimin is singing.
Granted, it’s not the singing most people are used to hearing. The arena is echoing with the sounds of the members of BTS performing their various voice exercises. At first it felt a bit strange, sitting on the edge of the stage where they’ll be having their Muster is a few day’s time. Experimentally projecting his voice, wincing a little at how a few weeks without singing made it a bit difficult.
“How’re you feeling?” Yoongi plops down beside Jimin, leaning back on his hands. Jimin shrugs, looking around the arena.
“I’d forgotten how big these venues are,” he admits. “And it’s only been a few weeks since I last performed.”
Yoongi grunts in acknowledgement, looking at all the empty seats that will soon be filled with their fans. “It’s a humbling feeling, isn’t it?”
“Yeah. Will we really fill this place up?”
Snorting, Yoongi gets up to his feet and holds a hand out for Jimin. “We will, I have a feeling that’ll be the least of our problems.”
Clambering to his feet as well, Yoongi’s words remind Jimin of what they have to do today. Heading toward the center of the back of the stage, they enter the loose huddle the others have formed.
The stage director, Kang Jisoo, does a quick headcount before beginning the little meeting. “Ok,” she rolls her shoulders, looking around the circle. “How’s everybody feeling?”
She’s met with an array of responses, all conveying the same meaning.
“Great. Does everyone feel confident with the different stages? Anything you feel like you need to go over before we begin the full rehearsal?” It’s quiet for a moment, but Hoseok voices what’s on everybody’s mind.
“How do you want us to move through Jiminie’s entrance and exit?”
Despite knowing that this question was coming, Jimin can’t help the spike in his heart rate. He’s itching to perform again, but there’s no way for him to anticipate everyone’s reactions when he comes out on stage. All he can do is try his best, he supposes.
The first couple of hours fly by, Jimin watching from the side for the majority of the time. It was decided that he would come on and perform with everyone for the final song, allowing for all of the members to leave at the same time as him.
When it comes time for that final song in the rehearsal, Jimin clenches his jaw while the platform rises up to the stage. Clinging to his microphone for dear life and forcing himself to look out at the empty arena instead of the red thread on his left hand, he readjusts his earpiece and allows for the music to take over.
Jimin’s eyes fall shut as he sings his part, a part of his aching heart basking in the lyrics. He doesn’t open them again until Taehyung’s deep voice is finishing out the song, and he glances around himself as though just remembering where he is.
He’s shocked when he catches Jungkook hastily drying his tears on his shirtsleeves.
“Kookie,” Jimin laughs as he rises from the stool, wandering over to the maknae. He pulls him into a hug, the other members watching with fond expressions. “You alright?”
Jungkook nods, sniffling a little more before pulling away. “Sorry hyung, I just...it’s sad.”
“The song?” Jimin asks with raised brows.
Shrugging and nodding at the same time, Jungkook looks around the empty arena as though able to see into the future when it will be filled with ARMY. “All of it.”
Kang Jisoo rushes over a moment later, her own eyes glinting a little with what might be unshed tears. “Right, after that, I would strongly advise saying goodbye and heading back to the lift.” She looks at Jungkook with a knowing expression. “It’s going to be a bit intense in here, I think. After that performance.”
“Should I have picked a different song?” Jimin asks, worried that it might prove too much for ARMY. “I just don’t think I could do a very high energy one, you know? But we could do 2! 3! Or something-”
It’s Taehyung who steps forward, throwing a comforting arm around his friend. “No. I think ARMY...I think I need to see it, actually.” He sighs. “It’ll hurt, but I think we’ll all look back and see that your performance, returning to the public eye with this song, gives hope.”
Once rehearsal is wrapped up, Jimin finds himself backstage with Jin and Jungkook. The three of them are in the process of stuffing their faces with whatever food they can find when Jin looks at Jimin quizzically.
“Have you texted Jolie at all since last night?”
Jimin’s eyes grow wide. “Er-” he swallows his food, “I forgot to charge my phone last night, it was dead this morning. I threw it on the charger once I got here. Let me find it.” He jumps up, heart beating a bit too quickly as he searches for his charged phone. This morning he’d nearly had a heart attack when he realized he’d fallen asleep with his phone in his hands instead of charging it up. When he tried to turn it on to attempt a good morning text to Jolie, he’d huffed and puffed as his poor phone refused to power up immediately.
By the time he’d rushed over here and found a charger to throw it on, he’d had to go on stage.
Now he finds it in the corner of the room, fully charged and-
“She texted me!” Jimin shouts, ripping his phone off the charger and rushing back over to Jin and Jungkook.
“She did?!” Jungkook and Jin simultaneously shout, eyes wide.
Jimin groans when he sees what time. “At like...four in the morning!”
“What did she say?” Jin urges, nudging him. Jimin unlocks his phone, immediately letting out a choked noise when he sees the adorable message.
It’s a photo of Elle, sprawled out as Jolie’s right hand (obviously not the left, which would show her severed thread), scratches her fluffy belly. Beneath the photo is a message.
Jolie (Elle): Elle’s much happier now, she says good morning!
Jolie (Elle): Oh, and she says thank you for the cuddles 😍
“Thank you for the cuddles,” Jimin squeaks out, parroting the message. Jin and Jungkook read the message over his shoulder, cooing at the adorable cat.
“What are you going to say back?” Jungkook asks, still smiling at the cute message. Jimin takes a moment to think it over, before typing out a message.
Me: Why is she so adorable??
Me: Alsoooo sorry for taking forever to respond. My phone was dead and then I forgot to take it off the charger.
He waits about sixty seconds before firing off another message.
Me: PLEASE DON’T STOP SENDING ME ADORABLE PICTURES OF ELLE THO, I SWEAR I CHERISH THEM
The others chuckle at him, knowing full well not to question him.
I’ve taken a pan out of my cupboard to begin preparing dinner when my phone pings. It just so happens to go off at the same moment someone knocks on my door.
Rounding the corner to open the door, I check my phone on the way and can’t help but let out a sigh of relief.
I was worried that Jaemin wasn’t going to respond.
I mean, I did text him...fourteen hours ago? It’s already six in the evening, it’s about time he responded.
“Open up! It’s the police!”
Rolling my eyes, I yank the door open to reveal a grinning Chung-hei. “Come in, loser.”
She does just that, sniffing the air like some sort of dog. “You haven’t started cooking yet, have you?”
I shake my head. “Just about to start.” Sliding an onion across the counter, I pass her a cutting board as well. “Since you’re late, you can chop the onion.”
Grumbling something under her breath, Chung-hei takes the cutting board and stations herself before the counter. “Yeah, yeah. How’s life?”
Shrugging, I get up on my tip-toes to reach the spices that I for some reason keep on the top shelf. “Pretty good. Actually, today’s been a pretty good day.”
“Oh really?” Hei wiggles her eyebrows at me. “Why? What happened?”
Shouting triumphantly when I finally reach the spices, I grin at my oldest friend. “I think I made a friend.” Then, pausing, I smile even wider. “Actually, two.”
Christina and Jaemin.
What a great starting lineup.
Chung-hei pauses in her chopping, looking genuinely surprised. “You’re being social?”
We both laugh knowingly. She’s always been the more outgoing one out of the two of us, although I used to be just as social as she was. Over the past year or so though, I’ve definitely become more of a recluse.
Almost like I’d forgotten who I was, content to just watch life fly by outside my window. I’d completely forgotten the thrill that comes from making new friends.
“A little,” I shrug. “What about you? How are you doing?”
Chung-hei looks like she wants to ask a bit more about my newfound friends, but drops it for now. “Same old, same old. I’m busy, Namjoon is busy, but we make it work. Actually,” she sets her knife down and steps back to avoid the effects of the onion. “I wanted to come here and apologize.”
Today is definitely turning out to be an...interesting day.
“What?”
Smiling softly, Chung-hei takes the chopped half of the onion to the saucepan on the stovetop and begins sautéing it. “I was...unfair to you the other day. Well, I guess it’s been a couple of weeks now, hasn’t it? For one, I’m sorry that it took me so long to realize that I wasn’t being a very good friend-”
I stop her with a confused look. “Hei, what are you talking about?”
“When I ambushed you at the bread shop with Namjoon.”
“Oh,” I say, stepping back and watching her. “I didn’t realize I’d be getting an apology for that.”
“Well, you deserve one. I wasn’t thinking about how you were feeling, I just got so in my head, just wanting to fix everything.” She shakes her head, staring down at the pan. “The only thing I could think about was how lost Namjoon looked when he came over that night, you know, when everything went down…”
“You mean when I cut the thread.”
Chung-hei finally looks over at me, a little shocked.
“You can say it,” I continue, chewing on the inside of my cheek. “It’s not like it’s a disease or something.”
She nods slowly, returning to the task at hand. “Ok. Well, that night when...when you cut the thread, Namjoon showed up in the middle of the night. He’d just left Jimin, and he was a mess. It took him forever to calm down enough to even speak straight, let alone rest. And of course, I was horrified. So when I found out that it was my best friend who was the reason for all of that pain, pain that I can only imagine was multiplied tenfold for Jimin, I just...freaked out. Bringing Namjoon to confront you seemed to be the only option for me.”
“...but it wasn’t, right?” I ask tentatively, taking in this new information. The thought of Namjoon being such a mess that night had never crossed my mind. I’d imagined that everyone would be angry, sure. But shell-shocked? Shaken to the bone?
“No. There were - still are - so many better options. And that’s been eating me alive the past couple of weeks,” Hei admits. “I’m so sorry, Jolie. For not even taking the time to figure out if you’re ok.”
It’s the apology I didn’t know I needed.
“...do you forgive me?” I ask quietly, realizing that what I may need more than an apology is forgiveness.
Chung-hei turns around to face me, tears rolling down her face that may not be from the onions. “I- of course I do. I did, weeks ago.”
As much as I want to dissolve into my friend’s embrace and cry with her, I find myself needing to know more. In my personal search for forgiveness, I need to understand why.
“How, though?” I venture. “Why?”
Blinking, Hei pushes the onions around on the pan for a moment longer. “How? I just...I love you. Even when you’re an idiot.”
I laugh at her honest response, suddenly feeling much lighter. “Thank you?”
It would appear that Christina is right. As horribly cliché and exhausting as it sounds, that’s the first thing I’ve got to understand if I’m going to find any way out of this mess.
Love just has to always be the answer, doesn’t it?
“Attention hog,” I mutter, quietly attacking love.
“What was that?” Chung-hei asks, thankfully not hearing me above the sizzling of the stove.
“Oh, nothing.” Slipping my phone out of my pocket, I grin at the messages I have waiting for me. It looks like Jaemin slipped another message into the mix, ever the impatient one.
Me: Wowww good to know you’re still breathing
Me: Also, if that’s what it takes to get a text back within a decent amount of time...maybe there will be a shortage of Elle pictures for a while. Thanks for the idea! 😂
When Jimin arrives back at the apartment that evening, he’s a little shocked to find himself walking into World War III.
Both him and Jungkook, who usually tend to share a car, freeze in the doorway as the unmistakable voices of Taehyung and Namjoon bounce off the walls. Jungkook is quick to close the door behind him, hoping that the rest of the prestigious neighborhood didn’t just hear the shouting.
“What do you mean you didn’t know what to do?!” Taehyung shouts, sounding like he’s upstairs. Jungkook and Jimin share a look, unsure of whether they should head up to break up the argument.
It’s been years since Namjoon got caught up in a screaming match with any of the members. Whatever it is, it must be serious.
Yoongi and Hobi sit on a couch in the living room, wincing at the bitter argument. Jimin and Jungkook wander over to them, hoping to find some sort of explanation.
“They came in like this,” Yoongi quietly explains, already knowing that they’d ask. “Didn’t tell us what’s going on, but they shared a car and I guess something happened.”
Before Jimin can ask anything, Namjoon’s voice interrupts him.
“What was I supposed to do, Taehyung?! Break Jimin’s heart all over again? Jolie hardly knows what she’s feeling, let alone how to pick up the pieces-”
“HE DESERVES TO KNOW!”
The entire apartment falls silent as Taehyung’s voice rips through Namjoon like a freshly sharpened knife. “He’s my best friend, and yours too, hyung.” His voice is softer now, although there’s still a barb to it. “Weren’t you the one preaching about ‘let it hurt, then let it go’? How is he ever supposed to let it go when you’ve been hiding this from him?”
“And how do you propose I tell him?” Namjoon says quietly enough that Jimin wonders if he actually heard him.
Before Jungkook can stop him, Jimin is striding up the stairs to see Taehyung standing in the doorway of Namjoon’s room, panting after his outburst. His heart is in his stomach, gut churning as he quietly walks over to his best friend’s side.
Taehyung jumps a little when Jimin appears beside him, but Jimin is immediately drawn in by the image in front of him.
Namjoon is sitting on the edge of his bed, head in his hands. Looking absolutely devastated.
“Tell me what?”
Head popping up, Namjoon meets Jimin’s eyes with his own blood-shot ones. “You’re home,” he croaks out, his voice sounding raw after the screaming match he just went through.
From the way Taehyung huffs, Jimin can tell he’s still riled up. Placing a protective hand on his shoulder, Taehyung urges his friend forward.
“Yes…” Jimin says, looking back at Taehyung. His friend keeps his eyes trained on Namjoon, almost as though daring him to try hiding the truth. It’s a look that has Jimin shrinking back, even though he’s not on the receiving end of it. “What’s going on, hyung? You- I heard Jolie’s name.”
Sitting up straight and nodding slowly, Namjoon looks utterly defeated. “Come in, Jimin. I...I need to talk to you about something.”
“What happened?” Jimin reiterates, feeling absolutely terrified. Nobody offers him a response just yet, although Taehyung does go inside with Jimin and stands beside him as he sits down in Namjoon’s armchair. It’s clear that Taehyung isn’t going anywhere during this conversation.
After a long moment, Namjoon adjusts to face Jimin, staring down at his hands. “Just, I need you to know that I didn’t hide this from you because I don’t trust you, Chim. I do. You know that.”
He glances up at Jimin, who nods for him to continue.
“Jolie...your soulmate, she’s Chung-hei’s best friend.” He pauses, allowing Jimin to take in this new information. All he can do is blink, his mind beginning to whir with what this implies. “And, er...I met her. A couple weeks ago.”
All Namjoon receives is a blank stare as Jimin tries and fails to compute. Taehyung’s chest is still rising and falling with heavy breaths, attempting to curb his anger.
“Chung-hei was freaked out when she learned about it, and she didn’t know what else to do. I wanted to tell you, Jimin, I swear. But I didn’t want you to get your hopes up-”
“You met her?” The question stops Namjoon in his tracks, instantly feeling more regret piling up as he sees the innocent confusion on Jimin’s face.
Jimin can’t believe that he could intentionally hide this from him.
“I...yes. I did.”
Nodding slowly, as checking off one question and moving to the next, Jimin furrows his brows. “As in, you spoke to her?”
“Yes.”
“But you didn’t tell me.”
“...no.”
“Because you were afraid of me getting my hopes up only to get hurt again?”
“Yes. Jimin, I-”
“Is she ok?”
Jimin asks the question in a quiet tone, but Namjoon has the distinct feeling of being caught in the middle of a hurricane. Indeed, Taehyung still appears to be fuming beside his best friend, but in Jimin’s eyes is a calculated sort of calm.
It hurts, Namjoon realizes. It hurts Jimin to still care so much even after having his heart ripped out. But that’s Jimin. To stop Jimin from loving would be to stop the world from spinning.
“She’s...lost.” Namjoon replies, unsure of how exactly to explain Jolie’s predicament. “Chung-hei feels horrible though, feels like she hasn’t been a very good friend to her over the past few weeks. She’s gone over there tonight to apologize.”
Jimin nods, fiddling with one of his rings. “Will you tell me what she said to you? Tell me everything that happened?” He hesitates. “Tell me...why?”
Namjoon looks more than willing to share that information with him, even if he doesn’t quite know why either. But he pauses for a moment, frowning.
“Jimin, I’m sorry.”
“I know.” Jimin chuckles softly when Namjoon looks confused. He shrugs, gesturing to his face. “You look horrible, so I figured you felt bad.”
Both Namjoon and Taehyung snort, and then the between them dissipates as Namjoon gives him an apologetic look. Taehyung just nods, accepting the silent apology. As long as Jimin’s alright, he’ll be fine.
“Well,” Namjoon stretches a little, “she bakes bread.”
The boys all filter in at some point, listening with every ounce of their attention as Namjoon relates his experience. It’s late, late enough that Jimin knows Jolie probably won’t respond to the text he sends around one in the morning, but hopefully she’ll see it when she wakes up.
Which apparently is around four in the morning each day for work.
Me: Goodnight! I promise to be better at responding from now on 😜 give Elle a kiss goodnight from me
That’s why he’s so surprised when he receives a text back, quickly followed by Namjoon’s phone going off and him accepting a call from Chung-hei.
“She’s probably calling to tell me how it went tonight,” he explains, promising to put her on speaker once he answers the phone.
Jimin nods, wide awake as he unlocks his phone.
Jolie (Elle): Woah woah woah, quit hitting on my cat. She’s taken.
He hastily sends off a reply just as Chung-hei’s voice fills the room.
Me: Ooh, touchy subject. I see that you get grumpy once it’s past your bedtime
“Hey guys! Jimin, can you hear me?”
Jimin nods before realizing that Chung-hei can’t actually see him. “Oh, yeah. How’s it going?”
“Great! I’m so sorry about keeping this from you, Jimin. Really.”
“It’s alright,” Jimin says, getting up to stretch a bit. “So...how’s Jolie?”
“Really, really well. She seemed a lot happier today. Said that she’s made some new friends.”
Jimin’s heart jumps up to his throat, realizing that he may very well be one of those friends.
“Oh.”
“That’s a big deal, though. Jolie hasn’t really gone out of her way to get to know anyone for a while. Seeing her like this was awesome.”
Jimin’s phone lights up with an incoming message, making him smile despite his worry over Jolie’s apparent anti-socialness.
Jolie (Elle): ugh don’t remind me
Jolie (Elle): I have to get up in less than three hours, pray for me 🙏
“The only thing I’m worried about is what’s gonna happen to her once you go back out into the public eye, Jimin,” Chung-hei muses, pulling Jimin’s attention away from his phone. “Jolie is going to become public enemy number one whenever people realize she’s got a cut thread.”
“Oh,” Namjoon mumbles. “I didn’t think about that.” He glances over at Jimin.
“We have to find a way to cover for her,” Jimin thinks aloud. “We’ll come up with something.”
The conversation wraps up, everyone eventually leaving Namjoon’s room as he continues chatting with Chung-hei. Jimin finds himself on the sofa in the living room, fingers hovering over his phone.
Me: I hope you’re asleep by now. Let me know how tomorrow goes for you, don’t fall asleep at work or something.
When he doesn’t receive a response back, he lets out a long sigh. Sliding his feet into his slippers, he heads outside to the balcony. Resting against the railing and looking out into the night, it doesn’t take long before Taehyung shuffles out after him.
“Hey,” he quietly greets. Jimin glances over at his friend, smiling softly.
“Hey.”
It’s quiet for a long moment, both boys taking in the beautiful night before speaking up.
“Do you wanna talk about it?”
Jimin chews on the question for a while beneath the twinkling stars, grateful for Taehyung’s quiet patience.
“I’m not sure,” Jimin sighs. “I feel like it’s all I ever talk about, but at the same time I don’t know how to talk about anything else.”
Taehyung hums in understanding, cracking his back before leaning up against the railing. “Should we not talk at all, then?”
Chuckling softly, Jimin nods. The silence wraps around the two of them as the night progresses, although it does little to tire Jimin out. He’s still wide awake when the clock hits three, and realizes with a start that Jolie will be waking up soon.
It’s the fact that no matter how hard he tries to hate her but can’t that has him finally opening his mouth to speak. When he does, Taehyung is alert and ready to listen.
“I wonder…” Jimin’s voice is croaky, making it sound like he just woke up. He clears his throat. “I can’t stop myself from wondering about her. She’s constantly on my mind. Especially now that I’ve seen her…” his mind immediately recalls how she looked crouching down to greet Elle, that soft smile on her face. “You know, I can’t help but wonder what’s happened to make her be so quick to cut me out of her life. That’s not normal. I mean, to be a little hesitant, sure. But to go to such lengths?”
“You’re right,” Taehyung murmurs. “What do you think it is?”
Jimin shrugs. “I’m not sure. But I’m going to find out, one way or another.”
Jimin has just finished showering and getting ready for bed when he realizes that it’s already four in the morning. Groaning once he realizes that he actually has to get up and do things in a few hours time, he wonders if he should wish Jolie good morning.
Will she think he’s weird?
Needy?
“Well, I am,” Jimin admits, not shying away from the desire to reach out to his soulmate. Unlocking his phone, he squints at the screen in the darkness, typing out a quick message.
Perhaps he’s a bit tired, or maybe he’s feeling more vulnerable than usual, but he finds himself hit with a sudden wave of loneliness. Wishing, despite the early hour, that he was with Jolie at this hour of the morning. Teasing her for having to get up so early, offering to take her out to lunch while Elle slumbers at the foot of the bed.
Picture perfect.
Me: Good morning 😸 I hope you were able to get some sleep!
The response is almost instantaneous.
Jolie (Elle): did you even go to sleep?? Seriously, if I make it to work in one piece this morning, it’ll be a miracle.
Jolie (Elle): Also, awww did I just receive my first official good morning text? 😌
Taehyung and Namjoon hover outside of Jimin’s room, watching him turn into a giggling mess. They exchange looks, chuckling to themselves.
“Hey, do you have a second?” Namjoon asks quietly. Jimin nods, letting them come in. Nobody bothers to turn the light on, opting to sit in the light darkness rather than blinding themselves at this early hour.
“Hang on, let me just respond to this real quick,” Jimin mumbles, chewing in the inside of his cheek before coming up with something good enough to respond with.
Me: No, haven’t slept yet. Looks like I won’t for a while. Hmmm, looks like I should start sending more morning texts? 😉 seriously though, good luck today. Let me know how you’re holding up.
Once he’s sent off the message, he sets his phone down to face his brothers.
“What’s up?”
Namjoon runs a hand through his hair, Taehyung sitting beside him looking like he’s half-asleep.
“Well, we’re trying to figure out how to smooth everything over for Jolie once word gets out that your thread was cut.” Jimin internally winces at the mention of his thread, but shakes it off as Namjoon continues to speak. “Any ideas?”
I’ve successfully made it through my shift, despite how slowly time was moving this morning. Scrubbing my hands in the big industrial sink in the back, I listen to the quiet chatter going on in the front of the store. It’s a Wednesday morning, not much is going on out there today. Chances are the shop will be empty until either the lunch rush or the end of the work day.
It’s the perfect way for me to slip out unnoticed.
I’m attempting to do just that, my apron already untied, when my boss Yuri calls out to me.
“Jolie! Really quick, before you head out, it looks like we’ve got an impromptu meeting…?” She looks at me expectantly, which has me furrowing my brow. Am I really so tired that I forgot about a meeting?
“Oh, er...ok.”
“Are we alright to have it back here?”
Again, I frown. Why is she asking me? She’s the boss. “Yeah, that’s fine I guess. Whatever works best for you.”
Yuri smiles warmly at me, although I don’t miss the way her gaze dips down to my left hand. “Great. I’ll let them know that we can chat back here.”
Them?
I shake it off, dubbing the strangeness of it all just a side effect to my exhausted state. It was great having Chung-hei over last night, but I haven’t stayed up that late in a long time-
“Hey Jolie, sorry to bombard you like this.”
I whip around at the sound of a familiar voice, eyes widening when I see Kim Namjoon standing before me. Opening my mouth to ask one of the many questions swirling around my mind, I find that no sound comes out as another tall figure steps into the room.
Coming to stand next to Namjoon, Taehyung’s residual smile from chatting with the employees in the front fades to a straight line. No smile, not an ounce of warmth crosses his sculpture-like features.
“Glad we could catch you before you head out,” Taehyung’s quiet, deep voice is nearly inaudible as he watches me from across the room.
Caught indeed.
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alotsgonnachange · 3 years
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Fan apprentice Bios
for the alotsgonnachange/the arcana cinematic universe that eye personally believe to be better than the original game...
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Name: Isabella Ciccino
Meaning: Promise of God
Gender: Female
Pronouns: She/Her
Height: 5′10
Birthday: October 28th
Star sign: Scorpio
MBTI: ISFJ-T
Patron Arcana: Justice
Sexuality: Lesbian
Favorite Food: Lemon chicken orzo
Drink: White wine (Vinho Verde)
Magical abilities: Plant care/recognition (green witch), Foraging
Ethnicity: A small rocky/mediterranean esque island off the coast of Venterre that would strongly resemble sicily and malta.
Family: Mother, Angela Ciccino (deceased). Younger sister, Annamaria Ciccino (deceased)
Backstory: WIP
Occupation: Seamstress/tailor
Hobbies: Ballet, reading, drinking wine, dancing, tending to plants
Familiar: None (for now i guess??)
Love Interest: Nadia
Description: Isabella is a mysterious and alluring magician. To most people she is kind and charming, but private. She is incredibly helpful and caring to those she is friends with and cares about and will drop what she’s doing to assist. Likes to do quiet introspective work like reading, sewing, knitting and caring for plants. She’s a bit of a homebody in that sense. She comes across as level-headed and assertive in formal settings and does not allow others to talk down to her. With friends, she is a bit more sassy and teasing. She hates answering personal questions and has strict boundaries, which can lead to her being standoffish and stubborn at times.
As a Love Interest: Very loyal and committed, generally very gentle towards whoever she is seeing. You are going to have to get her to open the fuck up though she’s not good at being vulnerable AT ALL. The type of gf who may or may not qualify as a therapist/mother which…yikes. needs to work through her fear of intimacy before she can have a healthy relationship awwww 5/10
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Name: Danielle Dupont
Meaning: God is my judge
Gender: Female
Pronouns: She/Her
Height: 5′6
Birthday: September 7th
Star sign: Virgo
MBTI: ENFP-A
Patron Arcana: The Sun
Sexuality: Bi
Favorite food: Pain au Chocolat (Chocolatine for my canadians…)
Favorite drink: Espresso or a good wheaty ale
Magical Abilities: Sexual magic, chemistry/potionmaking, candle magic, topical balms/solutions
Ethnicity: Whatever the Arcana equivalent is of like. Western Europe germanic? A country including but not limited to Germany, France, Belgium, Luxembourg, Switzerland. Who cares really she is white and an Orphan
Family: Orphan!
Backstory: WIP
Occupation: Shop owner who sells potions, balms, candles and various other uhhh items usually of the purpose of sex (literally think a modern day sex shop with dildos and shit but also candles and skincare too)
Hobbies: Socializing, singing, making/testing potions, foraging, baking
Familiar: None, is in fact frightened of several animals due to trauma :(
Love interest: Lucio (Her taste is questionable and that’s okay!), also portia
Description: Danielle is a cunning and animated witch. She’s outgoing, bright and carries herself with confidence. In the past this has made her friends and enemies alike. She’s charming but can be a bit of a trickster. Her demeanor is generally calm and she does not often experience strong anger. She’s very smart and dedicated to her craft, and she is a perfectionist. As a worker, she gives excellent customer service and is a good saleswoman. To her friends, she’s teasing and wild, but loving and encouraging. On her worst days, she has the potential to be a bit more inconsiderate and is not the best at handling huge displays of emotions from others.
As a Love Interest: Girlllll…. first of all she needs to stop being emotionally stunted! My good sis cannot handle open displays of emotion at all and tends to shut down! The physical aspects are all there and excellent and she is going to be sweet, caring and loving but she needs to take things more seriously and be able to talk about feelings!!! 3/10
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Name: Jia Song
Meaning: In korean it’s “clear” or “good”
Gender: Female
Pronouns: She/her
Height: 5’5”
Birthday: August 5th
Star sign: Leo
MBTI: ENFJ-A
Sexuality: Bi
Favorite Food: Pulled pork or a good seasoned steak
Drink: limeade
Magical Abilities: Potions/herbs and healing
Ethnicity: Her father is from the same country as Ki (in a modern AU, this would be like. Korea.) and her mother is from somewhere uhhhh near nopal or something. Warm tropical nice (in a modern au this would be Brazil), but she grew up in her mother's country.
Family: I don't currently have names but basically, her father, mother, aunt (deceased) and two younger brothers.
Backstory: will be linked coming soon
Occupation: Healer, researcher, linguist
Hobbies: Dancing, reading, adventuring
Familiar: None
Love Interest: Julian
Description: Jia is a bright and curious magician. She’s a bit nerdy and loves reading/learning new disciplines. She is an energetic and altruistic person who is liked by many. She comes off as kind and forthcoming. She is very helpful and if she can’t help directly she will find someone who can with her connections. To her friends, she is loyal and sweet and affectionate, but also has the potential to be grumpy and even a bit negative. She’s very determined in hard situations and won’t back down until things are made right. Despite this, she can potentially overthink and overestimate situations and is incredibly stubborn when she wants to be.
As a romantic partner: loving, but definitely also able to keep independence. Not necessarily a stage 5 clinger but somewhere in the middle. She will love just spending lots of time with a partner and just picking their brain and learning everything she can from them. The type to brag about them to her friends. A wonderful listener but give her a chance to speak too she likes talking a lot as well! 10/10 would recommend
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Name: Ki (Kiyoung) Kim
Meaning: Debatable but Ki alone means arisen and i’m getting “Vigor and eternal” But i think names differ based on the characters u use i am not korean so take this with a grain of salt
Gender: Nonbinary i think...
Pronouns: He/him or they/them doesn't have a preference
Height: 5′8″ Short king
Birthday: February 27th
Star sign: Pisces
MBTI: INFP-T
Sexuality: Gay
Favorite food: Budae Jjigae or Yongeun jorim
Favorite drink: any alcoholic beverage where you can’t taste the alcohol and strawberry milk
Magical Ability: Divination and mediumship (idk what the proper term is) so he can communicate with spirits/the dead
Ethnicity: Think of a small nation veeeery far away from Vesuvia that's cold for a lot of the year (for reference, think Korea).
Family: a twin sister named Jiyoung, 3 older sisters (Jiwoo, Jeongyeon, Joonhwa), mother and father and paternal grandfather and maternal grandmother who are living.
Backstory: will be linked coming soon
Occupation: Musician - mostly guitar and piano. Enjoys instrument care, arranging and performing in large ensembles, not a soloist by any means. He’s a great singer but he’s shy and singing gives him anxiety
Hobbies: Playing guitar, composing/arranging, reading, writing, shopping
Familiar: a tiny white dragon named Egg. Idc if dragons exist in this world but i feel like they HAVE to..
Love Interest: Asra
Description: Ki is a perceptive and witty magician. To most he comes off as a bit anxious and shy, which he is. Once you get past that, he’s eager, forthcoming and empathetic. He is very kind and likes to believe people have good intentions. He is very helpful and always tries to make sure others are comfortable and happy. He enjoys music and learning musical instruments. He prefers to work more in the background so as to not draw attention to himself. With his friends, he’s actually very talkative, silly and goofy. He’s prone to anxiety and may tense up or feel attacked when put into frightening situations. Unfortunately he has self destructive tendencies and low self esteem and has a hard time due to that.
As a Love Interest: perfect little s/o shut the FUCK UP…. that is if u can deal with low self esteem and anxiety! He really really tries though! He’s also shy with physical affection but will warm up to it eventually with familiarity and trust. Very doting and randomly shows up with delicious food and takes care of u when ur sick. 8/10
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Name: Mathilde “Tilly” LaRue
Meaning: Mighty In Battle? Lol
Gender: Female
Pronouns: She/her
Height: 5’11
Birthday: January 16
Star Sign: Capricorn
MBTI: INTP-A
Sexuality: Bi
Favorite Food: Lentil soup
Drink: Black coffee
Magical Abilities: Divination, telekinesis, herbs, defensive magic
Ethnicity: From a large urban area with a large population somewhere in an area a bit cooler and rainier than Vesuvia. (think like. England)(in a modern AU think Afro-caribbean)
Family: Mother and Mother and an older sister named Topaz
Backstory: will be linked coming soon
Occupation: Court Magician (but like simply a well rounded witch who goes wherever the money is)
Hobbies: Exploring, foraging, reading
Familiar: A white ferret named Elle
Love Interest: Muriel
Description: Mathilde is a gentle and thoughtful magician. She is soft-spoken and hates raising her voice, and is often making bizarre and thought provoking side comments in most situations. She is curious and intuitive when it comes to magic and often able to use several methods to predict the future for others. She carries herself in a dreamlike/contemplative manner and does not really care what others think - She’s off in her own world. With friends, she has a good source of humor and gives good advice and is a very good listener. She has an affinity for animals and nature, and would generally prefer to be outside. She can tend to be unrealistic and naive and loses hold on her emotions in tough situations (angry crier…) and feels misunderstood by those around her.
As a love interest: Downright adorable. Sweet, will bring you cool items she found and very endearing. She’s also encouraging and surprisingly cheesy. Not outwardly clingy but if you let her she will. but good fucking luck starting to date her! She is extremely pretty and gets asked out almost every day, turning down 99.999999% of applicants because other people do not particularly interest her and her taste is insanely picky! 10/10 but FAT CHANCE
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slasherb1tch · 3 years
Note
Hiii!! I saw you are doing matchups so i wanted to request one! I love your energy btw<3 i hope you are doing great!!
I'm 20 y/o genderfluid (they/them) and pansexual. i was born a girl and has body dysmorphia. I'm around 5'2 and have brown curly hair that goes to my shoulder but i often dye it coz.. why not? I'm lil chubby and have brown eyes. I'm really shy irl and i hate making eye contact with new people coz that makes me hella nervous. I'm also very bad at socializing lol. People make me so nervous and i often have panic attacks when im in a crowded place. But when im with my comfort ppl im a totally diff person. I'm become the extroverted friend when im with my friends. I'm loud and a total memer. I love making everyone laugh and I'm the therapist friend who secretly suffers on their own. I love animals alot! My cat is the loml. If anything happens to him i shut down. I'm also very lazy but a neat freck. I love dancing and singing. Cosplay, cooking and watching random show is my fav past time activities. I'm also an art student who is barely hanging on a thread. I'm a spicy head and i hate most sweet food. My fashion sense is all over the place. One day im a model and the next day im a plumper. I'm very sensitive and cry when someone is even slightest mean to me. But i never cry infront of anyone. Also I get scared of ppl when i start to develop a crush on them. I stutter alot and go complete airhead mode. Oh and i love physical affection! I love hugs and i can cling to someone all day i don't mind physical affection and will accept them any day!
Lmaosisjsjs i feel like i said too much but i hope this is enough! Im new to this whole fandom but i really love them!! They bring me so much comfort sjdjdjsj<3
Darling! Thank you for requesting from me! I hope I didn’t take too long on this and I appreciate your patience~! 💖
Your energy definitely made me chose this one for you…
You caught the attention of….
Stu Macher
Stu would definitely set his sights on you after he sees how silly you are! At first he totally thought you were going to be like Sidney, quiet and kind of reserved.. Once you opened up to him he’d be head over heels for you!
He’d love being silly with you, cracking jokes and just being chaotic yet wholesome in general. Stu isn’t the best with really understanding other’s feelings, but with you, he’ll try his best to comfort you and find ways to clear your anxiety.
Stu would adore your cat!!! He’ll bring them little cat sized costumes and treat your cat as if they’re his own child. There will be many times you find Stu trying to cuddle with your cat on the couch.
Honestly, I know that Stu would join in on your activities, buy you stuff for cosplays and new art supplies. He’d love showering you in gifts and new clothes or snacks. And hey, if theres somewhere you’d want to go, even if its just a mention, he’d immediately buy tickets.
Stu would love giving you affection, he’d wrap himself around you constantly, never really giving you a break from him. Whenever he gets the chance he’ll give you kisses or hugs or drape an arm around your shoulder, don’t even get me started on snuggling (again, he’ll give you no breaks).
Although Stu loves to hold parties and just be surrounded by crowds, he’ll make sure you feel comfortable first and spend time with you, without tons of people around. He might be a psychopath, but he’s still a decent partner… sometimes.
Again, thank you so much for requesting from me!! 💖💖💖💖
Enjoy~!
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Text
Beginnings (6/9)
Mammon x ace gn!MC x ace!Leviathan
NOTE - read the content warnings listed in Part 1
[ AO3 | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 ]
As soon as you felt Levi returning your hug, you closed his door behind you with your foot, giving him some much needed privacy as he silently cried while you held him. You felt a little bad that you hadn’t been able to talk to him sooner, seeing how worked up he had gotten. You gently ran your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck, which only caused him to shiver before he pulled you even closer than before.
“It’s ok, Levi. You didn’t really think I was going to let you get away with rejecting me at the end of a letter like that, did you?” you teased him. He didn’t respond, only clutched at your shirt as he tried to calm himself.
“We need to talk, you know?” you continued, feeling Levi stiffen against you. Talking. He didn’t like talking. What was there to talk about? Were you going to reject him after all?? Just like he had done to you?? Was this karma??
“Hey, it’s ok. It’s not a bad talk. I promise.” You felt Levi nod slightly against you, and you turned to press a kiss to his head, “It’ll be ok.”
There was no helping the smile that was on your lips. You had half expected Levi to insist on not speaking to you, and part of you really hadn’t even been sure that he was actually in his room when you had started talking. But as soon as he opened his door, you knew all you needed to know. He didn’t really want to reject you, his insecurities had just gotten the better of him.
A few moments later, Levi pulled away enough to wipe at his face with the sleeves of his jacket. He felt more than a little silly at having been caught crying like that, and then breaking down completely when he heard your confession. He kept his head lowered, hiding behind his bangs as best he could. You rested your forehead against the top of Levi’s head, occasionally giving him a small kiss, which only left him more embarrassed, albeit ridiculously happy.
“C’mon, let’s go sit down so we can talk.”
“Umm yeah,” Levi replied, taking a quick glance around his room before settling on the tub as the optimal place to have a, in all likelihood embarrassing, personal conversation. Laying down in the tub you wouldn’t be able to see his face, and he wouldn’t have to look at yours either.
He gently tugged on your hand, grabbing blankets and pillows off the floor as he led you further inside his room. He really had made such a mess of things when he had rushed to get to you, and he secretly hoped you didn’t notice. You knew however, what the cause of all the mess was, but you decided to spare Levi the teasing this once. At least until you had a chance to talk with him about the other things on your mind.
You climbed into the tub first, settling down quickly, before opening your arms to encourage a very blushy Leviathan to join you. This wasn’t the first time the two of you had cuddled in this position, it was one you often fell asleep together in if you stayed up too late watching a movie. But now that both of your feelings were out in the open, it just seemed so much more intimate and much less innocent and platonic.
A small chuckle escaped your lips as Levi finally climbed in beside you, resting his head on your chest and looping his arm around your waist. He could feel his heart still beating rapidly, his mind too hung up on the position he was now in. As you started to rub his back, he slowly started to relax, and you patiently waited for him to calm down before asking him any questions.
“You feeling better?” you finally asked, giving Levi a small squeeze around the shoulders.
“...y-yeah.”
“That’s good,” you paused briefly before continuing, “I really liked the letter you wrote me.”
Levi tightened his grip around your waist, anxiety starting to build again now that you had mentioned his letter. That was really the last thing he wanted to talk about, if he was being honest.
“I just, I don’t understand why you thought you wouldn’t be a good boyfriend.”
“...isn’t it obvious,” he mumbled.
“No, not really.”
“You and Mammon get along well. You have a lot in common,” he explained, hoping you could pick up on his vague hints.
“Umm, so do we…?” you replied, confused. You knew he was trying to avoid saying something, but couldn’t for the life of you figure out what.
“I mean...like I would much rather sleep with you like this than...other ways…”
“...ok…?” things weren’t getting any more clear for you at this point, if anything you were only more confused. You just wanted to cuddle with him right now too, so what was the problem?
“Umm...you know how you and Mammon do stuff together? Stuff you don’t do with me…?”
“Stuff I don’t…” you snapped your mouth shut as soon as you realized what stuff Levi was talking about, embarrassed and completely blindsided at the direction this conversation was going. Thinking about it, such a conversation was inevitable if your relationship was to go forward, but this wasn’t something you had ever spoken about to Levi before, joking or otherwise.
“Well, I don’t...do...those things…”
“...okay…?”
Levi took a deep breath, a little frustrated that you weren’t picking up on his meaning by now. He was also a bit anxious about explaining this to you, unsure of how you’d react. At least you’d still be his friend, right? Even if you decided he couldn’t make you happy in other ways?
“...I’m asexual.”
You weren’t quite sure what that meant, besides the obvious, but you could tell that Levi was nervous about telling you. You started to comb your fingers through his hair, holding him closer with your other arm, hoping to reassure him that you weren’t going anywhere.
“Can you tell me what that means?” you asked, keeping your voice soft and gentle.
“Well, it’s uh...kinda different for everyone I guess? For me I don’t like to...you know...but some people still do sometimes,” Levi explained, the feeling of your fingers in his hair helping to soothe his nerves, making it easier for him to open up as he continued, “It’s not really a one size fits all sort of thing.”
“That doesn’t sound like such a big deal. Why were you so nervous?” you gave Levi a squeeze, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.
“Huh? Really?” Levi propped himself up on his elbow to look at you, confused with how easily you seem to have accepted this. Even among demons, where there wasn’t any social stigma surrounding sexual activity, it was still considered a bit...unusual. And Levi knew from all his human world media consumption that things like this were even less common there. So why did you seem unphased?
“Well, yeah? What else am I supposed to say? It’s not that important to me either, so I can understand how someone wouldn’t be interested in it at all.”
You brushed Levi’s bangs out of his face, tucking a few loose strands behind his ear and as he studied you. He really did seem genuinely surprised at your reaction, though you couldn’t imagine why. Had he expected you to laugh at him or something? Get mad?
You gave him a soft smile, causing him to blush when he realized just how long he had to have been staring at you. Just when he thought he knew you, you always seemed to do something unexpected. And this was probably one of the best sort of unexpected things he could ask for.
“Wait, is this why you thought I wouldn’t be happy with you?” you asked, suddenly remembering what had started this conversation.
Levi’s blush deepened, as he lowered his gaze and nodded his head. This wasn’t the only thing he had had on his mind, but it was the one he most feared your rejection over.
“Aww, Levi, you don’t need to worry about that.”
You slipped your arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug. He was quick to wrap his arm around your back, hugging you in return, relief flooding his body. How did he get so lucky as to meet you? He knew he had told you several times before that he thought you were an angel, but he really meant it this time. No way someone as perfect, kind, and understanding as you could be anything but.
“So if you don’t like that, are there other things you are ok with? Or stuff I should avoid? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
“No, you’re fine,” Levi replied, shaking his head, “Just ask I guess?”
“Hugging, kissing, hand holding...that’s all ok right?”
“Y-yeah…that’s ok…” he mumbled into your neck, more embarrassed by discussing kissing than he had been about discussing his sexuality.
“You know, it almost sounds like it might apply to me too. I’d much rather do this most of the time,” you mused. Levi had lowered his body down again, his torso somewhat half on top of yours. You gently scratched at his back, drawing random shapes and patterns as you cuddled him, “Like if someone would have asked me what my ideal evening with my partner would be, this would pretty much be it.”
As you laid there together in comfortable silence, you let your mind start to wander back to when you were growing up. You had never really had the same sort of relationships that your peers seemed to be interested in. One partner even calling you a prude because of your lack of desire to do anything beyond holding hands. You had always written those sorts of things off as just trouble finding decent people to date, and hadn’t spent much time looking into it further.
As you got older, you had gotten more curious, so it seemed to come up less often. But still you never seemed quite as into it as those around you, content to take a calming bath with your partner most nights than doing anything else. You thought about occasionally asking one of your close friends about their thoughts on the subject, yet something always made you hesitate to mention it.
Mammon had probably been the most loving and supportive partner you had had to date. Even though he was pretty much always ready to go at a moments notice, he never pressured you to do more than you felt comfortable. And he was happy to find other ways to please you and spend intimate moments together. There had been a few times here or there in the beginning, of course, when you both had still been trying to figure things out, where he took your lack of interest personally. But you were always able to reassure him, since his primary fear was rejection more than anything.
“Are you okay?”
“Hmm?” you looked at Levi, who had now raised his head to check on you.
“You were really still so I thought maybe you were...reconsidering…?” his voice trailed off.
“Oh no no no, sorry! I was just lost in thought. I’m fine. You’re fine,” you smiled at him again before gently guiding his head back down to rest against your shoulder where it had been, “It’s just the more I think about it, the more I think it might apply to me too. I just didn’t really know that was a thing before, you know? I’ve always been kinda nervous to ask anyone about it since it seemed like everyone else just knew what those feelings were.”
Levi tightened his grip around you, protectively almost. He knew that feeling. That anxiety about not wanting to draw attention to the fact that you’re different. He didn’t like imagining you feeling that way. You had always made him feel safe, and he wanted to be able to do the same for you. He knew it was silly, there wasn’t anything he could do about things that happened before you met him, but still. He wanted to make sure you knew at least that he would have been there for you if he could have.
“I have some links and stuff I could send you. It might help,” he offered.
“Yeah that would be good, thanks,” you replied, giving him another kiss to the top of his head and an affectionate squeeze. “Anyways, there is still something we have to talk about,” you continued, changing the subject.
“Th-th-there is?” Levi stuttered, unsure what could possibly still be needing to be discussed.
“Mammon.”
Levi flinched in your arms at the sound of his brother's name. He had forgotten about him completely, but as soon as you mentioned him, the scene at breakfast started replaying itself in his head.
“We made up, which I think you figured out this morning.”
“...yeah,” Levi weakly replied. Of course this all was too good to be true. Sure you loved him, but that didn’t really make a difference, did it? You still had Mammon. These must have just been some affectionate goodbye pity cuddles you were giving him before cutting him out of your life for good.
“Well, awhile ago Asmo was telling me about demon relationships, and how polyamorous relationships were pretty common here…” you paused, taking a deep breath to calm yourself, the knot of anxiety in your stomach forming once again as you recalled the first time you had talked to Mammon about this. Levi was Envy personified, after all, him reacting in a similar manner wouldn’t be outside of the realm of possibility.
“So I was wondering...if you’d maybe...like to try that…?”
“REALLY?!” Levi snapped his head up, almost whacking you in the face in the process. His eyes were sparkling with excitement like you had just offered him the world. And you did, from his perspective. Yeah he’d have to share, but he could touch you too! A lot if he ever got brave enough! He could even plan a real date! Like a normie! Maybe he could even convince you to go to a maid cafe with him?! Or dress up like a maid?! And cosplay! There were so many great cosplays he could do with three people!
“Wh…” you were startled by Levi’s eager reaction, but he was just so excited, you couldn’t help but laugh at how cute he looked, “Yeah Levi, I mean it,” you replied with a smile of your own, “We will need to discuss details with Mammon, but he’s already agreed to the idea too.”
The next thing you knew, Levi had tackled you into a hug, pushing you further down into his nest of pillows, completely overwhelmed with happiness.
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f33itan · 4 years
Text
🎮👾Aʀᴄᴀᴅɪɴɢ Iɴᴛʀᴏᴠᴇʀᴛs👾🎮 (From my Wattpad)
FYI: F/N in this oneshot means "Friend's Name". I don't wanna choose the name because 1. that's restricting names of whoever you want, and 2. Im to lazy to come up with names every time. LOL- (Also, sorry if I kind of switch from 1st person, 2nd person and 3rd person randomly.)
Feitan POV:
"Hey Feitan! Go change, we're gonna go find an arcade!" Phinks yelled from the doorway.
"Shut up, you're, too, loud."
"Whatever, just change, we're leaving soon!!" Tch, that dude so annoying. Why cant I just read in peace? Finally found a good book, yet he just had to ruin it. Damn it. No point in fighting, him and Shal gonna drag me to arcade whether I change or not. 
A/N: Imagine him in something like that hehehe, or whatever outfit you want him to wear if you don't like that one. :)
-------------
Your POV:
"We're finally getting a break, but if you keep taking your sweet time, were gonna be back in class before you can say, Y/N's a slowpoke!" F/N yelled in your face.
"Maybe if you get out of my face, I would go faster!" Even though you guys nagged each other 24/7, you guys were still the closest friends. You had known F/N since 4th grade, when you guys were partners for an animal project. At the time, you both loved lizards, so you both were excited to work with one another. Next thing you know, its college, and you guys both get into your dream school. (Insert college name) had been your goal for years, but its quite a lot of work. This was your first week long break, and you weren't trying to waste it on getting ready to go to an arcade. After you were finished with everything, you and F/N got into their car and drove to the arcade. They were blasting (Insert song name) and singing along, so you decided to record them.
"This will be funny to look back at later!"
꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂
After about 20 minutes, F/N parked and you both exited the vehicle. They stretched as if they've been in the car for hours, and you thought they were kind of exaggerating.
"Y/N, what if we find you a boyfri-"
"NONONONO I LIKE BEING ALONE NONO BOYFRIENDS NOO!"
"You and your social anxiety need to get out more!" You gave them a little "hmph" before heading inside. You guys played a couple dancing games, 2 player games, a 4D scary game, and some simple joystick games. After a while, you both decided to order some food at a bar, and sat down for a little break.
"What would you two like to drink today?"
(You) "Can I get a -insert drink- and a -insert food/snack- please?"
(F/N) "I'll have an orange juice with a cheeseburger!"
"I'll have your meals out shortly."
꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂
Feitan POV:
"Hey, look over there! Those people look nice! Maybe we should go talk to them!" Shalnark said. Man, socializing? No thanks. Just wanna get back to that damn book. Well, guess arcade has been kind of fun. I guess...
"FEITAN!!! EARTH TO FEI FEI!!!"
"Phinks, don't call me that."
"Whatever, come on let's go!" Why the heck they dragging me? Wait, why we heading to the people over there-
(You) "Uh, hello?"
"Hey! I'm Shalnark, and these are my friends Phinks and Feitan. We were wondering if you guys wanted to go play some arcade games with us!" Stupid Shalnark, being all friendly. Extrovert girl took fat bite out her burger and gave us a muffled "Sure, once were done eating."
Ew, messy. Guess their friends kind of cute though.. wait, WHAT?
-Small timeskip- also back to your POV :
After eating, you, F/N and the trio went off towards the multiplayer things, and you all decided to find some 4 player games. Each time somebody had to sit out, it would be one of the guys. Feitan always volunteered, but Shalnark made them all decide by flipping a coin. You and everybody else were starting to warm up to each other, when Phinks and F/N had an idea. While a 3 player game started, they both snuck off into a corner and devised a plan on how to get you and feitan to interact. Turns out both of you were quite introverted, and they both wanted you two to put yourselves out there and find a partner. After deciding on what to do, they went back to Shal, Fei, and you. You thought they were acting a bit suspicious, but you just shrugged it off.
"Hey Shal, F/N, lets go do something!" Before Feitan could join, reject, or even realize what was going on, Phinks was already dragging F/N and Shalnark in some random direction. Y/N and Feitan just stood there in silence.
"So uh, whhaaattss your favorite... game here?" Feitan just stood silent, staring at you. But, for some odd reason, the silence was comforting, and your thoughts eventually drifted off into the clouds... so much so that you didn't even notice him grab your hand and start pulling you throughout the arcade. Your body just continued moving though, and you didn't bother to question him. After about a minute of walking, you ended up in front of a little fishing game. (Imagine that game where there's that spinning knob thingy and you have to reel in fish with it)
"Wow, wouldn't expect the emo boy to like little kid games like this!" You laughed and gave him a playful shove, which he returned with a silly eye roll.
"Shut it shortie."
"WHAT? YOUR THE SHORT-" You froze. He moved swiftly behind you, lightly pressing his body against yours. He grabbed your hands and put them on the game joysticks.
"Stop, wasting time. Let's, just play, the game." Both of you were blushing, and you continued playing games and making silly jokes for a good hour or so. Little did you know, that Phinks, Shalnark, and F/N got so many videos and pictures of you two...
EXTRA: PHANTOM TROUPE GROUP CHAT ; ABOUT 1 WEEK SINCE ARCADE
Phinks: Hey guys, you won't believe what I have to show you.
Shalnark: Ahem, WE, and I have some too...
Shizuku: What? What's going on?
Pakunoda: Hm?
Hisoka: Oh, do tell~
Phinks: Feitan, you're here right?
                                                                                                        I don't trust you guys..
Phinks: You shouldn't
Machi: Are you guys going to show us or not? You got me curious.
Chrollo: Well, no point in making us wait. Please inform us with your "tea"                                               or whatever it is people say now a days.
Shalnark: Alright, prepare to get your minds blown!
~Phinks and Shalnark send all of the best photos and videos they got, and after a couple minutes of the troupe going through every single one, they started talking again~
Pakunoda: Wow, I didn't expect you to be the caring type Feitan!
Shizuku: I think they're cute together! (ᗒ◡ᗕ) ♡︎
Hisoka: Aw, shes so pretty, might just have to make her mine~
                                      Chrollo kicked Hisoka from the chat
Chrollo: I'm so happy, Fei has finally found a girl 😊
Phinks/Shalnark: When's the wedding?
                                                                                                      I'm giving you to count of 3.  
                                                  I'm gonna torture and kill both of you. Skin you alive.    
Shalnark: I have her number!                        
                                                                                                                                               No-                                                                                                                                                          
Word count (including author notes, etc:) 1244
Wrote January 20, 2021
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hermionemonica · 4 years
Text
The Road to Us, and Everything in Between: Chapter 2
(This is a no magic AU. There is no existence of the Miraculous or the superheroes in this universe.)
AO3 | Chapter 1 | Chapter 3 
As time went on, Marinette felt distances creeping between her and Nathaniel. They still talked to each other over calls, texting and social media, and even met up with each other every once in a while. But all that grew more and more seldom. And for Marinette, this felt different. Of course, her affections for Nathaniel still remained unchanged, but it felt kind of liberating to not have his presence constantly looming over her life. And with the alone time Marinette now had away from Nathaniel, she found herself constantly rethinking her life and decisions. About what she chose, about what could have been.
Marinette had always had a habit of talking to herself. Now every time she felt herself falling into dejection, she would whisper to herself over and over, “I chose this. This is my life now. This is what my life will be from now.” That did wonders to push the fears and insecurities to the back of her mind.  
But as days passed, it started to get harder and harder. After all, it is an inexplicable pain to see the one you love right in front of you, be with them, all the time knowing that they'll never be yours. Being around him didn’t do anything to help her move on from him, even if she tried.  
Gradually, the secrets and the pretences began to take a toll on her. And with the new university and her fashion courses, it was all too much for her. She felt herself giving in to the pressure. Designing or baking did not work their therapy on her anymore. And the first thing she did when things started getting bad was slowly cut off Nathaniel. Not that she wanted to. It was just she couldn't trust herself to not explode in front of him. And after everything the boy had been through, the last thing he'd want was the only person he trusted to go off on her. So the only solution that she saw was to stay away from him. Only, she could not come up with an appropriate excuse. The poor boy kept asking her what was wrong, but Marinette would say she was fine. Until one day she snapped.  
Marinette was having a particularly rough day, after she had accidentally dropped her sketchbook, which held her designs that she had been working so hard on, right into the waters of the Seine. She had retrieved them, of course, but her work of weeks was ruined. She had shut herself in her room and decided to bury herself in her designs till she redrew them. It probably wouldn’t be as perfect as the originals, but she needed to submit something the next day to pass the class.
Unfortunately, Nathaniel chose that very evening to call her. Marinette ignored his calls and messages for a while, till the alert sounds were getting on her nerves. She finally picked up the phone and asked, “What is it, Nate?”  
If she sounded grumpy or bitter, Nathaniel obviously did not notice it as he went on a ramble about how a cute guy on the subway had complimented him on his blazer.  
“And this is what was so important that you called me for like, 17 times?” Marinette cut him off mid-rant.  
That was when it registered in Nathaniel's mind. “Uh, I thought you'd like to know,” Nathaniel spoke nervously.  
“Maybe I would, but not everyone necessarily has the time for this! Take the hint when I wasn't answering your calls or replying to your texts.” Marinette replied acidly.  
“What is wrong Mari?” Nathaniel sounded concerned.  
“Why does something have to be wrong?” Marinette was beginning to lose her temper. “It just happens that you don't seem to realise that some people might have more important stuff going on than just a random guy complimenting you on your clothes!”  
When there had come no reply from the other end, Marinette quickly disconnected the call and switched her phone off. She had too much on her hands at the moment.  
Marinette had fallen asleep at her table, sometime in the middle of the night. In the wee hours of the morning, she woke up to find a string of messages from Nathaniel, which he had sent right after the phone call the previous night.  
“So, this is it? I... I don't matter anymore? It’s okay, Marinette, I get it. I was just an unnecessary burden that you were carrying around although you didn't have to. This had to end sometime, right? After all, we both know very well that I'll never be able to give you what you want. I am only holding you back from everything that you could have, everything that you deserve. I'm sorry for everything Mari, I hope you can forgive me. Take care Marinette, and be happy. I promise I won't bother you anymore. Goodbye.”  
Marinette had not seen this coming. She couldn't deny that she had been a bit too harsh in her words the previous night, but was it that bad? Had she made it sound like she didn't want Nathaniel to be around her? She tried to remember what exactly she had said, but to her anguish, all of it was a blur. In exasperation, she kicked against the side of her desk, only to wince back in pain immediately afterwards. Surely, the voice in her head kept saying, this can't be happening. Nathaniel wouldn't just leave just because Marinette had said some harsh words, right? Their relationship was too above that, of course! After everything they had been through together, a little miscommunication couldn't possibly be what would break it! Over and over she read Nathaniel's texts, trying to make something out of it, something less painful. She tried to read between the lines, desperately trying to convince herself that it wasn't happening.  
The only reason she dragged herself out of her house an hour later was because she had to submit the designs that day. And the only reason she had left her phone without replying to Nathaniel was because she was scared that she might mess it up further.  
Three agonising hours later, Marinette sat in the cafeteria. Anger coursed through her. Anger at Nate, anger at herself, anger at the stupid deadline! As she desperately tried to reign in her temper, because that was what had caused the entire mess in the first place, she found herself regretting her decision to leave her phone at home. At least she could have called Alya and talked to her. At one point of time, Marinette had been glad that no one from her old school was in the same university as her, because then she could put everything behind her and start her life without the lies. It didn’t seem that convenient anymore. She wished she could talk to someone, anyone, right now. But since there was no way to do that, she went back to sipping on her iced tea to soothe her nerves.  
“Are you okay?” said a voice from behind Marinette, as a hand was laid on her shoulder.  
Before Marinette could turn around, the intruder came into her range of vision as he seated himself at her table.  
It was Adrien, and he was looking at her with concern in his emerald hands. Did she really look that terrible? Marinette asked herself. More importantly, what could she answer to Adrien, when he didn't even know anything about Nathaniel? But then again, she was stuck in the university for at least two more hours, without a phone and no one but Adrien to talk to. Adrien was the only friend she had for now, and Marinette felt she would combust from the stress if she didn't talk sometime soon. Sure, once she figured out how to begin.  
“It's umm... you know, about this boy,” she struggled through her words.  
Immediately, Adrien perked up. “Boy? Crush? Ex? Boyfriend?”  
Marinette felt a smile creep up onto her face in spite of herself. “Let's not use any labels, okay? It’s a bit too complicated for that,” she clarified.  
Adrien wiped the silly grin off his face and looked on with interest, silently urging her to continue.  
“So we had kind of an argument last night, and I may have been a bit rude to him. In my defence though, I was stressed beyond limits. And this morning, I woke up to a bunch of texts from him, saying that... that,” Marinette faltered. How do you put that into words?  
Luckily, Adrien seemed to have understood what she was trying to say. “That he’s leaving you for good,” Adrien offered.  
“Exactly,” explained Marinette. “Except that I meant nothing like that and he took it all the wrong way and he thinks I want to get rid of him and oh so I feel so angry at him right now because after all this time how could he misunderstand such a simple thing and I-”  
“Woah there,” Adrien interrupted. “Slow down. Maybe drink a bit more of that drink you've got there.”  
“Iced tea,” murmured Marinette, “soothes my nerves.”  
That was when she realised that her hands were shaking so badly that she could not even hold the glass in her hand. And on the top of that, a pounding began in her head.  
As she clutched her head in her hands, Adrien reached over. “Hey, are you okay? Do you need anything?” he asked.  
But Marinette could not hear him over the incessant buzzing in her ears. Breathing had never felt so difficult, it was as if something was blocking her trachea.  
Adrien could see Marinette gasping for breath, and shaking uncontrollably, and it scared him. What was happening to this girl? It took him a moment to snap out of his fixation, but then he got up and picked Marinette up in his arms, rushing to the nurse's office, ignoring all the odd looks he could feel on him in the corridors.  
The nurse injected a mild tranquillizer into Marinette's blood. It took effect pretty soon, and soon Marinette had drifted off into a dreamless slumber.  
“It looks like your friend over here has had an anxiety attack,” the nurse explained to Adrien. “Is she under medications for such attacks?”  
Adrien simply looked on with bewilderment.  
Either he is too stressed out to comprehend my words right now, thought the nurse, or he seriously has never heard of an anxiety attack. Deciding on the former, she went on, more gently, “Has she ever had spells like this before?”  
Adrien looked down, his expression guilty. “I-I don't know. I don't spend much time with her.”  
The nurse shook her head. “Well, I am guessing by how freaked out she was when you brought her in that she is as unacquainted with these attacks as you are, young man. Whatever be it, I need to contact her parents. Marinette Dupain-Cheng, you said?” The nurse asked as she scrolled through the student records on her computer.  
Adrien nodded.  
“I assure you that your friend will be okay, you may take your leave if you have classes you need to be at now.”  
Adrien took a glance at his watch. His class had started fifteen minutes ago. Since he was late anyway...  
“No,” he confidently lied to the nurse. “I don't have any classes for another hour.”  
“Fine,” obliged the nurse. “Do keep the young lady company while I go call up her parents.” Adrien silently sank down on the edge of the bed Marinette was asleep on. As he stared at her face, he noticed how ill she looked. The colour had faded from her cheeks, and dark bags hung under her eyes. What could have been so terrible that upset this amazing girl like this?  
Marinette's parents came in some time later. Adrien noticed the stark difference in their appearances. While Marinette's mother, who looked and dressed Chinese, was a small woman like her daughter, Marinette's father could aptly be called a giant of a man. They seemed like very nice people, by the way they talked to the nurse. Mrs Cheng assured the nurse that her daughter did not have any history of anxiety attacks. In that case, the nurse advised them, they should get their daughter a professional check-up at the earliest. They thanked the woman for her help and turned to leave.  
As Mrs Cheng left the room with her daughter leaning onto her, still not quite awake, Mr Dupain stopped at the door. He turned to look at Adrien standing there, and Adrien couldn't help but be intimidated. But Mr Dupain had the kindest of expressions on his face as he grabbed Adrien's hand and firmly shook it. “Thank you for taking care of my little girl,” he whispered gratefully.  
Adrien was surprised to know that the huge man could speak in so low a voice. “It was a pleasure,” he smiled in acknowledgement.  
After he left, Adrien wondered if he had even done anything that special to receive such warm gratitude. “Taking care of” Mr Dupain had said. Funny, thought Adrien, for anyone would probably have done the same if a friend went through something like that in front of them. Nevertheless, Adrien decided that the Dupain-Chengs were probably affectionate people by blood.  
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faulty-writes · 4 years
Note
Hi there, so I might have binge read all your bnha works in one go... 👉👈 and I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind writing some angst to fluff for me? I don’t know if you write multiple characters for one scenario (if you don’t, then just Todoroki? (and if you do, maybe Tamaki, Izuku and Bakugo, take your pick!)). I’m asking for something where the reader (gf) doesn’t like to talk bc her voice is unusually low and gets made fun of? Please don’t feel pressured to write it! Love, from a shy fan💜
[Requests: Open]
[Normally I limit things to three characters per request but since you asked so nicely and you’re such a dedicated fan of my works. I’m happy to grant your request. I hope you enjoy and thank you for liking my writing! I appreciate it <3 I decided the best way to do this was bullet style.] 
Shoto Todoroki 
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Shoto had always had an honest personality, which is why when he found you with your head down and a few tears streaming down your face, he had to ask why. But you only shook your head and refused to speak which irritated Shoto somewhat. He cared about you and he wanted you to trust him. But he had an idea of what was bothering you. 
“Is this about your voice?” he questioned as he took a seat next to you and pulled you close, Shoto knew that you didn’t particularly like your voice and he found himself often on the spotlight defending you because others liked to think it was funny to bring you down over something so silly. After all, your voice was a part of who you were and he loved you. 
You sighed and nodded in response to his question, “Hm, I see.” he said before leaning over to kiss your forehead. “This may sound strange to you, but I enjoy your voice. It’s unique and it’s what made me notice you in the first place. I know you have a hard time accepting it and if I’m being honest, I’m getting sick of seeing others make you cry over something that belongs to you.” 
You swallowed and looked at Shoto, confusion in your eyes. “I ...” you closed your mouth before shaking your head. Shoto reached down to grab your hand, gently stroking his thumb across the top of it. “No please, use your voice. Tell me, I want to hear that beautiful sound only you can make.” you frowned before looking away. “I h-hate my voice.” you squeaked, it was too deep and unfeminine.
Part of you wondered how Todoroki could stand it but he only smiled. “I love your voice, regardless of what you think. Your voice is beautiful, your voice is important and I will always choose your voice, your words over even the sweetest of lullabies,” he said as he gently began to rock you and you felt tears prickle in the corner of your eyes. “Thank you, Shoto.” 
Tamaki Amajiki 
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“B-Bunny wait!” Tamaki called after you, hearing the laughter continue and it made him angry. His fingers tightened into fists and he turned to face the fellow UA students who had decided to make fun of you. “S-Shut your mouths. A-All of you! S-Shut up r-right now!” he demanded, despite not being that brave when it came to social things. His anger fueled him at the moment. 
“Hah! The anxiety boy and deep voice girl, what a pair! What’s a matter Amajiki couldn’t do better than a girl that sounds like she could voice Darth Vader?” Tamaki growled, tempted to use his quirk even though it would be wasted on such punks. 
“I s-said shut up!” Tamaki snapped, “You c-call yourselves, heroes, b-but make fun of p-people for the t-things they can’t c-change? I-I’m proud to be w-with someone w-who isn’t a-afraid to be t-themselves!” he growled before taking a step forward, his tentacles at the ready. “So I s-suggest you stop m-making fun of the p-person I love or I-I’ll t-teach you a l-lesson!” despite the fact that he was trembling, he seemed intimidating enough for the group to back away. 
“T-That’s what I t-thought ...” he muttered before running to find you pressed against a wall near the courtyard. He frowned as he approached you and held you close. “P-Please don’t cry B-Bunny, d-don’t listen to them! Y-Your voice, it’s w-what makes you w-who you are and I k-know ...I k-know you have t-trouble talking j-just like me. B-But please d-don’t stop talking t-to me. I-I’ll miss your v-voice, d-deep or not. I-It’s you.” He said as he nuzzled against your hair. 
You sniffled, burying your face into Tamaki’s chest. “Y-You mean it ...” you responded, cringing at the sound of your voice as always. But Tamaki smiled and leaned down to kiss the top of your head. “Y-Yeah I d-do ...y-you’re my Bunny and y-you always will be. W-We can help e-each other f-find the courage to u-use our voices f-for the greater g-good. I p-promise, I-I’ll make sure you l-learn your v-voice is a-amazing and w-wanted and n-needed even.” he said before squeezing you. “I l-love you, Bunny.” 
Izuku Midoriya 
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Izuku should have known something was wrong when you texted him that you wanted to be alone. Even though you were only a floor away in the dorm building. He hadn’t wrapped his head around what was wrong until Kirishima informed him that he saw some of the upperclassmen making fun of you. Most of their jokes revolved around your unusual voice. 
He felt like an idiot, it was so simple he should have known better. He groaned before rushing to your dorm room, knocking loudly but he got no response from you. So instead, he began to text you. [Kirishima told me what happened, you’re the most important person to me. Why didn’t you tell me?] he sent it and waited for your reply. [BECAUSE YOU KNOW I HATE MY VOICE.] 
He frowned, sure your voice was unusual but who wasn’t unusual in a world full of quirks? [Your voice is fine! Don’t listen to what other people say, they only make fun of you because they know you’re better than them. I know you’re quiet and reserved but whenever I hear your voice it makes me really happy. I love hearing what you have to say, your opinions, your favorite things. Everything.] 
You sighed as you read his text and shook your head. [My voice is too weird, I wish it was different! Why couldn’t I have had a lighter voice?] you waited a minute before Izuku responded. [Please come out of your room and talk to me. I know that might be asking a lot. But all of us in Class 1-A would never make fun of you and now that we know what other people have been doing, we won’t hesitate to put a stop to it.]
He frowned as he waited for your door to open, almost losing hope after a few minutes but then he heard a click and your head popped out. You looked at him with a frown and he approached you. “I promise, your voice is important here and I would never lie to you,” he said with a smile as he pulled you into a hug. “No matter what, I don’t care who it is. When someone makes fun of you, especially for your voice they are making fun of me too. I won’t stand for it.” he said as he reached up to stroke your hair. “You’re perfect as you are, no matter what anyone says.” 
Bakugo Katsuki 
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“Will you just FUCKING speak already!? I know you have this thing about your voice, but come on. Are you really gonna listen to what those shitty EXTRAS have to say?!” he snapped and you looked down, unsure of how to respond. 
“It doesn’t matter what they say, it only matters what you fucking think of yourself, and frankly I’m getting sick of you always putting yourself down,” he said as he crossed his arms over his chest. “You’re better than them! Even without your voice, even when you choose to use your voice. It doesn’t matter and if they disagree they can answer to me.” he said as he lifted his hand, allowing his tiny explosions to come to life. 
 “I’m fucking sick of them making you have a pity party for yourself, so what?! Your voice is ...pretty weird but it’s part of the reason why I LIKE you okay?! You’re pretty awesome and ...well I’m not for mushy stuff but I’ll blow their fucking heads off if I hear them make fun of you again.” he said as he clenched his jaw in anger. He sighed and reached over, pulling you up. Something that made you gasp before you quickly pressed your lips together. 
One arm was wrapped around your waist and the other reached up to cup your cheek. “You mean a lot to me okay!? I don’t like seeing you cry and all that other bullshit those BASTARDS put you through,” he said before leaning down to peck your lips. “Don’t ever let them say your voice isn’t important, that it’s too deep or whatever the fuck they have to say.” he paused before continuing. 
“Babe ...I love your voice and well, it makes me happy when I hear you talk. It’s not a pleasure I get often so ...when you’re around me, could you at least lower your defenses down enough to talk to me?” he questioned and you glanced to the side, “I ...o-okay.” he smiled at you, “Thanks ....and thanks for trusting me. I couldn’t go without hearing your voice at least once a day. It’s one of the things that actually makes me smile.” 
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funkymbtifiction · 4 years
Text
What’s been your experience of knowing a person of each Enneagram type?
It’s nothing if not interesting. 😉
1s: can be principled, dutiful, and reliable. Their pet peeve is for people to be rude, irresponsible, inconsiderate, or late. I’ve known an sp 1 and a soc 1. The sp 1 does indeed resemble a 6 due to content fretting, low self esteem, terror of getting it wrong, and general anxiety, but shows 1 behaviors of obsessive cleaning, a desperate need to control everything, and rigidity in setting up “house rules.” In so doing, she has denied herself anything that is not “useful,” which I find terribly sad. She has no room for pleasure in her life. The soc 1 is far more inclined to be assertive, to correct others, to point out what they are doing wrong, and to show her anger. Much less self doubt.
2s: ah, 2s. I’ve known a few marginally and one “sort of” well, since I spent ten days with her on a visit to another state. She truly reminded me of Molly Weasley in her bustling about, her attending to everyone’s numerous needs (and ability to keep us all in line), her pride in doing things for everyone, and her sensitivities. At one point, her daughter told her, “MOM, STOP MOLLY WEASLEY-ING CHARITY! SHE’S FINE. SHE DOESN’T NEED WATER. THANKS.” Ha, ha. I liked her a great deal, but it amused me how defensively she drove – under stress, I saw her 8 come out, though I didn’t know that’s what it was at the time. We all snapped to attention whenever that happened.
3s: I admire their work ethic but… the one I know offline has to find some way to impress people, no matter what. If that is in showing you his muscles and making sure you know how far he biked today, so be it. It used to be because he was proud of his professional life. Since retirement, I have seen him struggle enormously with having a sense of purpose and trying to find one that doesn’t hinge on his non-existent work. That is what worries me about 3s – getting old, and no longer having society regard them as “useful and essential” is HELL on them. Please, make sure, if you are a 3, to do the internal work on figuring out who you are, and recognizing your own worth as separate from what you do, before you reach that age.
4s: I have known a lot of 4s, some healthy and some not. I have two delightful healthy ones in my life right now – an sp/sx 4 and an soc/sp 4, and they are indeed different. The sp 4 is more internal and less aware of or inclined to change herself for others; the soc 4 looks outward, and is highly attentive to other people. Sp 4 can take on others’ pain and burdens in a sense and feel overwhelmed by it – and with both of these beautiful girls, I’ve seen it turn them toward compassion. But they do tend to run high on “drama.” It’s not a song, it’s an opera. I knew an unhealthy 4 once who was hell-bound to remain miserable and a victim wallowing in her pain and thwarted (almost sadistically gleefully) anyone’s attempts to help her rise above her bad situation. She wanted to stay there. And she drove everyone who knew her insane. Eventually, she lost all her friends due to her being the wet mop all the time -- which of course, fed into her sadistic happiness at being miserable, abandoned, and unloved.
5s: can be callous at times, just because they are so lacking in emotional self-awareness and so fixated on logical solutions, but they will give it to you straight if you ask for it. They tend toward severe social awkwardness—think Mr. Darcy at the Netherfield Ball. Most inclined to disappear five minutes after you meet them and remain unseen until you leave. I knew a five once, the father of a friend, who would call out hello to me as he walked right past me, straight down into the basement, where he hid for hours among his books. Given he had a house full of giggling, silly girls, I don’t blame him. He was truly Mr. Bennet.
6s: can be either the warmest, funniest, most loyal people you will ever meet – or the biggest pains in the butt, and I say that as a 6. I know one other sp 6 and he reminds me of myself, just older and male – we both are hilarious, we both tease people to establish a rapport with them, we both crave feedback and support from trusted others, and we both swing between concern and optimism. But unhealthy, paranoid 6s are out in force right now freaking everyone out about the COVID-19 and the world doesn’t need that. It needs HOPE. So for heaven’s sake, put down the freak-outs, the paranoid accusations, the wild conspiracy theories, and accept that your worst-case scenario projections are just that -- the product of your own scared mind. It may or may not happen, and trust me, 6s, I know damn well that your worst fears usually don’t happen anywhere except in your head.
7s: are enormous fun to go on vacation with, but can be flakes. Lovable ones, but still flakes. They promise more than they can deliver and then avoid you rather than face up to the music when they realize they don’t want to do what they promised. They are hilarious, witty, optimistic, and their enthusiasm is infectious, but sometimes they fail to realize that not everyone wants to be endlessly teased, mocked, or come home to a mountain of stuff followed by a maxed-out credit card bill. Life is not always a joke, sometimes it is serious. And they are inclined not to finish a serious conversation if it in any way makes them uncomfortable or feel like they’re about to confront part of themselves.
8s: I have only known one and… there are things I like about her. Her courage. Her ballsy attitude. This woman made a place for herself in a man’s world, in a time when that was not done. She bulldozed her way to the top. Unfortunately, she never shut off the bulldozer. She has burned bridges behind her, made countless enemies, and gets into foolish personal and legal fights because she refuses to back down from anyone, and will turn anything into an argument. She lost my mother as a friend, because she thought bullying her was a good idea. My mother set up polite boundaries and the 8 trampled them, something my mother does not forgive. Something 8s need to remember – what is fun for you (you consider fighting “bonding”) is not always fun for someone else who is not an 8. Being an 8 is an asset, but only if you learn to tell the difference between a threat and a non-threat.
9s: are some of the most precious people on earth, but also the must frustrating for me, because I see them being mercilessly treated by the rest of the world, which tends to walk all over them. I wind up counseling 9 friends who are frustrated at ‘not being heard’ but cannot find it within themselves to assert themselves in any way, or think they deserve to be heard, or know how to recognize what is NOT okay. Being a 9, a peacemaker, someone able to understand everyone’s point of view, is a valuable gift, but you cannot use it for good if you are incapable of believing you deserve good things, too.
Each Enneagram type has a health level. You can find them at the Enneagram Institute. Figure out which level is ‘you’ and start working toward the next one up, through conscious choices. You don’t have to stay this way. Your life is yours to command.1s, you don’t have to be perfect. 2s, you don’t have to please others. 3s, you don’t have to win every time. 4s, you don’t have to stay in a place of self-loathing. 5s, you don’t have to fear trying things. 6s, you don’t have to be afraid all the time. 7s, you don’t have to run away from everything. 8s, you don’t have to turn every discussion into a fight. 9s, you don’t have to give everyone whatever they want. It’s time to take back your life.
- ENFP Mod
PS: Most of these examples come from my extended family, none of whom follow this blog, so if you’re one of my friends (unless you are the 4) -- I’m not talking about you. ;)
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rant-2-me · 3 years
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My mental state has just worsened over the days, though I'm not sure why, and I just feel so unmotivated and lacking any energy to practice any self care other than napping, and also feel anxious because I'm not studying enough.. feel like I'm just 1/4th assing my responsibilities.. And when someone asks me how I'm doing, sometimes I blurt out that I'm not fine, and the guilt I feel afterwards for making them worry, so I find myself withdrawing from initiating conversation with them, even though I really want to, and this makes them worry about me more.. I just don't know anything anymore, everything feels too much, yet I can't rant in a clear conscience without feeling guilty for bothering them, and thinking how I don't deserve to complain because they have had so much worse (yes I know pain is relative, but I feel so horrible, like a whiny child, who doesn't know how to be content with her blessings)......
Sorry I know it's a lot.. feel free to delete it if it's triggering or making you uncomfortable in any way... I just needed to get it out..
My lovely nonnie, im so, so glad you sent this ask. and got it all out of your system. yeah this sounds cheesy but like ive been there, with not knowing how to reach out—im proud you had the courage to send this ask. girlboss vibes.
also this ask took a while to answer and im so so sorry about that, but I didnt want to do anything less than the best for you, so let's just jump right in <[:)
Lacking motivation, god I've been there, but doing self care is super super important so here is a how-to, hon.
How to do selfcare when you’re not motivated to:
1. Be a little “gross.”
Gross is in quotes because it’s so subjective, but you undoubtedly have a few behaviors you consider kind of gross regardless. Now’s the time to do them without judgment. For me, that’s meant showering less, eating weird food combos (sometimes in bed), and letting my brows and mustache grow magnificently unruly. For you, it could mean doing something you normally judge yourself for or cutting back on activities you only do for the benefit of others. Now is not the time to allow “socially acceptable” behaviors to rule you.
2. Eat whatever the hell you want.
This should be a rule always, but I’m not going to pretend there aren’t societal, social, and personal pressures that go into why we eat what we eat. Try to shut down the voice that judges or polices what you’re eating right now. We’re in the middle of a goddamn pandemic. If dinner has to be some slices of cheese and deli meat eaten in front of the open fridge, so be it. If you have a lot of cravings and are snacking more than you normally would, cool. If pre-pandemic you decided you were going to stick to a certain meal plan and it’s just not happening anymore? Don’t beat yourself up.
Yes, what we eat is connected to our mental health, and I don’t want to discount that—but if the stress of eating healthfully is making you feel like crap anyway, whether that’s because you can’t fathom cooking or don’t have the means to shop for certain foods during isolation, just eat the sleeve of Oreos and try again another day. It’s okay.
3. And wear whatever you want.
Or, more realistically, wear whatever you can. Even if it means wearing the same ratty sweatpants for a whole week. Or month. Maybe you started all this out aspiring to get dressed every day to work from home productively, or maybe you have a whole collection of comfortable loungewear you feel guilty for not utilizing. Whatever arbitrary rules and expectations you’ve set for yourself, you can throw them out.
On the other hand, maybe you need to quiet the voice that tells you there’s no point in getting dressed or feeling presentable. If it helps, by all means, play with your look, wear awesome or weird outfits, do your hair and makeup or whatever activity might feel a little silly given your current reality. In the middle of a pandemic, nothing is a waste of time if it makes you feel good.
4. Use shortcuts to avoid creating chores.
In my first week or so of working entirely from home, I was baffled by just how messy my apartment got. How on earth were so many messes piling up when I wasn’t even doing anything but working, sleeping, and eating? I hadn’t realized it, but a lot of my small tidying routines had become casualties to the pandemic. And, it turns out, slacking on the little ways I pick up after myself every day (such as doing the dishes right after I use them) added up quickly.
Instead of forcing myself to stick to the same levels of tidiness that I used to maintain, I’ve found shortcuts. For example, I use paper plates and plastic cutlery when I feel too fatigued to wash dishes so they don’t sit in the sink for days on end. Or I stick to the same two “outfits” to avoid clothes piling up when I’m too depressed to put them away every day. If you can find a small way to go easy on yourself, even if it feels a little wasteful or indulgent or gross, it’s okay to tap into those shortcuts right now.
5. Be kind to yourself if your place is messy or dirty.
I won’t lie: I’m someone whose space impacts my mental health a lot. Typically, keeping my apartment clean helps keep my mental health in check and letting my apartment get gross makes me feel worse. That’s still true in a lot of ways, but to adapt I’ve been trying to be mindful and accepting of where I’m at. And it’s…helped?
It turns out that taking the pressure off does a lot to mitigate the guilt and some of the other negative mental health effects I usually experience. In practice, it involves a lot of talking to myself. Instead of seeing my apartment turning into a depression cave and immediately thinking, “Oh, God, I need to clean up, this is so disgusting, I’m a monster for living like this, of course I feel depressed,” I go for kindness. I think (or even say out loud because, well, desperate times), “Of course my apartment is a mess right now. I’ll get to it when I get to it. I can handle the mess for now.”
6. Accept your new sleep schedule.
idk anyone whose sleep hasn’t been screwed in some way by all of this. Anxiety, depression, fatigue, pent-up energy from sheltering in place, tech use, new work responsibilities, screwy schedules…pretty much every aspect of our new reality can impact our sleep. Some people are sleeping a lot more, some are sleeping a lot less, and some are cycling through both extremes. Oh, and the temptation of naps! It’s all there.
Trying to maintain a healthy sleep schedule during all of this is a worthy endeavor—and more power to you if you’ve figured out how—but there’s a good chance that it feels impossible.
By “accepting” your new sleep schedule, I don’t mean pretending it doesn’t suck; I mean doing what you can to be gentle on yourself about it. For me, acceptance has looked like watching some comfort tv and reading my favourite books at 2 a.m. instead of staying in bed and anxiety-spiraling about how I can’t sleep. Is it ideal? No way. But I’m not going to waste energy stressing about something I currently can’t control.
7. Give yourself plenty of room to do absolutely nothing.
I’ve given myself permission to do a whole lot of nothing. That includes getting rid of the pressure to be productive and practice self-care, yes, but in a broader sense, it also means not forcing myself to actively “adjust” every day.
Some days, I just need to do nothing but feel my feelings. Or avoid feeling my feelings. Or stare at the ceiling. Give yourself space to do (or not do) whatever you need to.
also, nonnie? my love?
Never feel guilty about telling someone who cares about you when you don’t feel okay.
People who genuinely care about you—and I’m sure they are many—will care if you aren’t feeling good, there are always going to be people who care about you, who want you to be okay, that’s why they ask, why people make rant, why “how are you?” is such a common question.
But if you do need to talk, but you feel like you’ll “burden” people who you do talk to, here’s a guide to ranting.
Guide to ranting:
1. Pick the right person. Someone who’s in the right headspace to listen to you, you could also pick someone who cares about you—if you’re anxiety tells you nobody cares about you, pick someone who “should” care about you in your relationship, e.g: a friend you’ve had for a long time, a friend who’s told a few of their problems, or friend you might not feel close with, but seems very kindhearted and a good listener.
2. Pick the right time to talk to them, so you can have their undivided attention. If they are busy—as most people will be with something—they’ll have a hard time giving you good advice and listening to you. Ask them when they are free, and then ask them:
3. “hey, can we talk? I’m not mad or you or anything, it’s just that I have been not feeling great, and I just want to rant to someone about it.” and “No pressure to say yes, you might have your own stuff to do deal with.” to make sure they are the right person to talk to.
4. It’s ok to test the waters. Start slowly, you don’t have to share everything at once if you don’t want to.
5. You never know how your friend will react to what you say.While you can’t know how they’ll react, just remember that sometimes people’s initial reactions may come from a place of shock, surprise or not knowing what to say. Their initial reaction isn’t always their longerterm reaction, it may just take them a little time to process.
6. Look for ways to take action. Don’t get me wrong, ranting can be amazing for you, but on its own may not solve your problem.
But maybe venting to people isn’t for you. No matter! There are other ways to get out emotions:
Ways to rant without talking to anyone
1. Cry it out— simple and rewarding. When the baggage is just too heavy to carry cry it out. It can help you ease the pressure and ease your mind to think straight after days of holding that frustration in.
2. Work out — easy and fun. tire yourself out and release all the frustration in working out! This is going to be so satisfying for you as you try and punch, kick, balance, lift, and breathe those frustrations away.
3. Clean & rearrange — practical and can be fun. we get frustrated by so many things and one thing that can truly help clear our minds is to have a clean place where we can stay and live for the moment to breathe. Clean your room, rearrange your things and you’ll be surprised by the satisfaction this brings — a signal of a new beginning.
4. Scribble — simple and fun. Make scribbles, doodles, drawings, take a pen or a pencil, and let go. It does not have to be “good” art or professional at all. Just draw whatever comes to heart, sunflowers or clouds or rainbows—anything.
5. Write it down — fun and simple. Let those words out of your head and just live in the moment.
How to fight the lack of motivation.
1. Don't fight the lack of motivation.
If you feel down or unable to muster tons of energy, let it be ok. Be easy on yourself and acknowledge that it's ok to have a dip, especially at this time of the year.
2. Once you have accepted your slump, get to the bottom of it.
Ask yourself, "What is the root cause of this sluggish feeling?" Go deeper than the obvious reasons. Is it related to work? Your personal life? Relationships? It might also just be the weather. Get clear on what areas of your life you're feeling the most resistance.
3. Dig into that area. What is not ideal about this aspect of your life? What would make it better?
Make a list of how you'd like your current situation to improve--and be specific. If you truly can't find a reason to be less than enthusiastic, then accept your feelings and let them pass with time.
4. Take your list of what is missing and go through it.
What is holding you back from being able to create the things that are missing in your life?
5. Get support for creating the life you want.
Do some research and find an expert to help you. Even though they love you, friends and family aren't objective enough, and they tend to give advice that is a reflection of their own life and insecurities.
6. Think of current habits that are contributing to a less-than-ideal life.
Maybe it's fear, laziness, or not having enough confidence. Pick one to focus on.
7. Address this habit over the next 2 months.
They say it takes 28 days to create a new habit, but this varies from person to person. If you focus on it for two months, you are sure to build the neural pathways needed to call it a new way of being.
8. Buy a book, read articles or do some research on this particular behavior or feeling.
Read about the common causes of this habit as well as the proven ways to bust through and work around it.
9. Create a plan around shifting your current habit.
Make sure that changing this habit ultimately helps you move forward in the area of your life that is not ideal. The energy from clarity, awareness and then action will immediately get you feeling more motivated, no matter what.
10. When all else fails: make a list of activities that excite you, and do one of them right now.
Talk to a fun friend, dance around at home, workout, watch a funny YouTube video, tackle something on your to-do list. Accomplishing something will give you a hit of dopamine in your brain. If you're too overwhelmed by your day, sit for five minutes and meditate. Put on some soothing music and breathe.
okay, that's all nonnie, I hope you feel the lust for life in your lungs, please have all my love, i hope this helped, this ask took a while, but it was worth if it helps
and if you need to dont worry to send another ask, if you like spam the inbox!! queen!!!
take care, much love my sweet honey, bye <3
—*putting daisies in your hair as they leave* mod peppermint <[:)
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Naughty or nice?
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Based on this: “Thor dressed up as Santa for the Avengers Christmas party. Sitting upon a throne of candy canes and gum drops he calls out your name. It was your turn to sit on the God of Thunder's lap. Imagine him whispering in your ear asking if you were going to be naughty or nice for him later that night. Feeling disgusted you excuse yourself from the party to return to your apartment only to find him waiting for you.” requested by anonymous
Warnings: noncon sex (fingers, intercourse)
Note: Okay, so I’ll be working on holiday drabbles over the next few days. I haven’t too many atm but hopefully one or two a day if I can manage!
Hope y’all enjoy. Like and/or reblog!! <3 Reblogs really help especially since I haven’t been getting many.
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Tony’s parties were always extravagant. Over the top but elegant. This year’s theme was winter wonderland. Cliche but classy. Wear something sparkly, the invitation said. Of course, sequins were the look for the night but you opted for blue-silver dress with long sleeves and a skirt to your knees. Elegant, like Taylor before Burton. Your sparkle was a silver necklace with a single sapphire.
When you entered, it was a swarm of sheen and shine. Tony wore a dark red suit with a sequined gold tie, Steve had managed a glittery blue tie with his grey suit, and Bucky looked dour amongst the bunch with a string of tinsel around his neck, no doubt forcefully slung over his head. The women were only too content to show off their sequined gowns and bright frills.
Thor stuck out like a sore thumb. A santa hat of sequins and a full-out costume as he sat on the faux-snow throne at the front of the room. Loki frowned as he held a pair of elf ears and argued with his boisterous brother. Tony looked on with amusement as others tried to ignore the bickering.
You neared, hesitant, eager to greet your host before you found a flute of champagne to hide behind. Tony was chuckling as you came closer and you could hear the Asgardians’ voices above the jazzy seasonal tunes and refined din. Loki tossed the ears at Thor’s chest.
“Brother, you demean me!” He accused. “For the last time, I am not your sidekick.”
“Oh, brother, don’t be so dramatic. It is theatre. I am the god of Christmas--”
“Santa Claus,” Tony intoned.
“Yes, this San-ta Cloos,” Thor mimicked, “And you are my loyal helper. The true hero of the night.” Loki fumed and Thor turned to reach over the arm of the chair. “Fine, you don’t have to be an elf. How about...a deer!”
Thor pulled forth a headband with antlers and offered it up. You stopped beside Tony who was shaking in silent laughter. You nudged him and he glanced over at you, his face red with restrained mirth. 
“Who’s idea was this?” You asked.
“Well, I was just going to hire a mall santa but...Thor insisted.” Tony explained. “Though I don’t think he discussed it with his brother first.”
“Clearly,” You eyed the brothers as Loki snatched the antlers and snapped them in half. “Were you intending on keeping this place in one piece?”
“Worse things have occurred here than sibling rivalries.”
“I think you underestimate them,” You shook your head and turned to him. He was still rapt by the scene. “This is really fabulous...for now.”
“Thanks, but it wasn’t me.” He shrugged. “I think if I took credit Pepper may just reenact this little show with me tonight.”
“Well, I’ll let her know--”
Tony raised his hand and pointed to the brothers. Thor had stood and Loki was right before him. Thor reached out and placed the ears over Loki’s and his wrists were seized by the black-haired Asgardian. 
They struggled for a moment, Loki’s dark haired was mussed as he wrestled with his brother, and the scuffle last only a moment before he snaked out and took the ears with him. He whipped them at his brother who caught them with one hand and spun on his heel. Loki cursed under his breath as he stormed away and Thor boomed with laughter.
“Never an occasion without a tantrum,” Thor pronounced as he turned to Tony. His eyes found you beside the billionaire and his smile grew. “Ah, my lady, you’ve arrived.” He sat in the snowy throne, his thick arms draped over it. 
“Thor,” You greeted reticently.
“Santa Close,” He corrected and you squinted at his peculiar pronunciation. Tony chuckled again. “Tony has declared me the king of the party.”
“Alright, I really don’t know where he’s coming up with this stuff but...I’m gonna find Pepper before he drives me crazy, too.” Tony excused himself with a twitch of his brow. “Santa.”
You watched Tony go and wondered if you could slip away with him. Thor was boisterous tonight, more so than his usual fervour, and you were quite ready to contend with it alone. “Um, I should--”
“You should come sit on Santa’s lap!” Thor declared and you looked back to him in shock. “Tell me what you want this year?”
“Okay, Thor,” You laughed, “You’re really taking this seriously.”
“Yes, I have a list,” He tapped his head. “Lady Natasha wants a new knife, she showed me how dull her old one was. And Steve wants a nice pair of shoes, very practical. His friend with the arm wanted me to leave him alone and that was an easy enough gift to give.”
You blinked at him. Wondering at how disastrous this evening had been so far. You weren’t exactly late and it seemed you’d missed all the fun. “Well, Thor, what I want for Christmas--” He shook his head.
“You have to sit in my lap and tell me,” He insisted as he rubbed the red velvet across his thigh. “I understand this is Midgardian tradition.”
“For children,” You scoffed. 
“Well, my lady, we are still young. So sit.” He slapped his thigh and beckoned you close with his other hand. 
You glanced around and saw how so many guests were avoiding Thor’s gaze. Bucky frowned as he peeked over and a glimmer of pity shone in his eyes. Steve looked over in kind and quickly grabbed him to draw back his attention.
“Alright, but then I’ve got to go say hi to everyone, I’ve only just got here.” You relented and stepped closer to the bottom of the chair.
“Very well,” He allowed and held his hand out. “But you cannot start the evening without first greeting Santa.”
He tugged you up onto the step below his throne and between his legs. He guided you as you turned and released you. He swiftly grabbed your waist and swept you up onto his leg. You grabbed his shoulder to steady yourself.
“So, my lady, what do you want for Christmas?” His hand rested on your lower back, tenuously close to your ass.
“Um,” You looked around, suddenly hyper aware of the room full of guests. “Thor, this is silly, I’m gonna--”
You tried to slip out of his lap but he snaked his arm around and clung to your hip. He took your chin with his other hand and made you look at him. “Tell me what you want?”
Your eyes rounded and you felt your skin burning. You stuttered before you could even find your breath. “Uhhhh, um,” You licked your lips as you thought, your mouth suddenly dry. He focused on your tongue and you pressed your mouth shut. Finally you found your voice. “A vacation.”
“Vacation?” He repeated as he tilted his head.
“Yes, I uh, wanna go away for a while. Take a break from work.” You explained nervously as you moved your clutch onto your lap and played with the embroidered flap. 
“Well, my lady, you surely deserve a respite,” His arm fell slightly and his hand returned to your back. He leaned forward and his fingers crawled down until he was cupping your ass. “But are you going to be nice or naughty?” You gasped. “As I understand, only nice girls get what they want.”
You stared at him and trembled just slightly. He squeezed your ass as he felt you waver and you pushed yourself off of him. You nearly stumbled as you landed on your heels painfully and clattered down the step. He let you go without a fight but his fingers longingly trailed your arm as you detached.
“Sorry, I should--” You turned back to him as you righted yourself. “I gotta say hi to Nat before she takes out that knife again, yeah?”
Your feet twisted together clumsily as you fled. Thor said nothing but you could feel him watching you as you dove into the crowd. You were lost at first, Nat’s red head not visibly until you were on the other side of the room. You leaned on the wall as you tried to clear your head. 
Were you being stupid? Did you overreact? You looked across the room to where Thor sat at a vantage across the whole din. He looked back at you and grinned. Was he really looking at you? You peered back to Nat and Wanda and pushed yourself from the wall. 
You grabbed a drink from a server as he passed and wove between the couples and groups that chattered. Forget it. It was done with. All in your head. Nothing. Your own anxiety fueling your fretful imagination. Have a drink with your friends and you wouldn’t care so much.
-
At the end of the night, you barely recalled its beginning. Three glasses of champagne kept you in a festive spirit. Thor remained a speck in your vision, looming in your peripherals. But it grew easier to ignore him. Easy enough to chalk it up to your social awkwardness.
You left with a final goodbye to your hosts and wrapped yourself in your jacket as you headed out onto the chilly city street. Tony had hired cars lined up for guests, both inebriated and not. Always mindful, always thinking a step ahead. 
You slid into one and gave your address, a tip for the comped driver. The drive was relaxing and lulled your champagne hazed mind. You were almost dozing in the backseat as the car pulled up to your building. You thank the driver one last time and were once more awakened by the winter air.
The elevator ride was slow. Or so it seemed. You stepped off and dragged your feet down the hall to your door. You unlocked the door and entered with a yawn. You kicked off your heels with a sigh, happy to be ride of the torturous arches. You just wanted to sleep.
You dug your phone out of your clutch and flicked on the flashlight. You shone it ahead of you as you crept through your dark apartment. You were too lazy, too tired to flip the lights on. You were just going to get out of your clown suit and fall into bed.
Your bedroom was full of shadows. You passed the open door and set your phone on the night table to let it shine up at the ceiling and illuminate the space. You reached back to unzip your dress and struggled to bend your arm at such and angle. As you brought your arms up over your head to push down the zipper, a large hand caught yours.
You tried to scream but another hand clapped over your mouth. A long shush filled your ears as a warm body pressed against your back. “My lady, you needn’t be afraid.” Thor’s voice was low, sultry, “I only mean to help you.”
He parted just slightly, the heat of his body still radiated around you. He tugged down your zipped in a single swipe and the fabric loosened around you. You held it up against your chest as he kept his hand over your mouth. Your voice was smothered by his palm and you pulled at his hand.
“You didn’t answer my question?” He shoved his other hand beneath your chest and snaked around to your stomach. “Have you been naughty or nice?”
His hand slipped down to your neck and you kept yours on it. “Thor, what are you--?”
“I think you’re a naughty girl.” His hand drifted lower, just over the top of your panties. He played with the lacy elastic. “Aren’t you?”
“Thor,” You warned and his other hand slid from under yours and tugged at the top of your dress. “Stop.”
“You said you need a break…” He purred and moved his hips against you. You could feel his arousal through your skirt. “I can help you relax.”
“I think you misunderstood me.” You clung to your dress as he tried to push it down. “Please--”
“Don’t act so innocent,” He snarled as his fingers edged under the top of your panties. 
He turned you, the light of your phone gave a sinister dim to the room. You tried to resist him but he was too strong. He almost had you off your feet as he pressed your legs against the bed. 
“Naughty or nice?” He asked again.
“Get off of me,” You whined. “Thor!”
He stopped pulling at your dress and wrapped his arm around your middle. He lifted you and brought his knee up between your legs. He climbed up onto the bed with you in his grasp and fell onto you, pinning you beneath his body. Your legs hung over the edge as his other hand felt around your vee.
You were crushed beneath him as he kept your legs apart with his knee. He pushed his fingers between your lip and pressed on your clit with his index and middle finger. You squirmed and whimpered. You could barely breathe against his weight. 
He dragged his fingers up and down your folds and circled your clit, over and over. The shame mingled with your unwanted arousal. You grabbed at the blankets, unable to move yourself from beneath him. 
The heat gathered with your juices and he groaned as he felt it. As he spread around your entrance and shoved his fingers inside. They were so thick, it hurt. Even with your bodies response, it was too much. He pulled out and pushed back in. Slow at first, he kept his palm against your bud. 
You quickly unravelled. You whined as you tried to resist the surge within you. You writhed beneath him, unsure if you were working against him or with him. You buried your face in the blanket as your breath picked up and you gasped. He worked his fingers faster and you shuddered as the waves washed over you. 
You went still as you came; ashamed and trapped. He ground his crotch against you as your pussy clenched around his fingers. He slowly drew his fingers out of you and lifted himself slightly to free his arm from under you. He brought his hand around as he grabbed your chin and squeezed your jaw. He forced his fingers past your lips, the taste of your cum sweet on your tongue.
He reached down with his other hand and pulled up your skirt. It wrinkled around your hips as he revealed your skimpy black thong. He tugged on it and groaned. His hand fumbled between you and you grabbed the hand in your mouth as you realized what he was doing. 
You felt the tip of his cock as he pulled it free of his pants. Your fingers clawed at the furry cuff of his jacket, the realization that he still wore the costume chilled you. He brought his other leg between yours and spread them further. He dragged his cock along your ass and down the line of your thong.
He hooked his fingers under the sheer fabric and pulled them aside. He used his thumb to guide himself to your entrance. You slapped his hand desperately and protested around his fingers. You bit down as hard as you could. He flinched but didn’t withdraw his fingers, only pushed them deeper until you gagged.
His tip stretched you as he entered you. He paused as if to let you adjust and you tried to kick your legs around him. The movement coaxed him deeper. He was thick and your walls strained against him. He didn’t stop this time. He slid inside until you were sure you couldn’t take anymore, but there was more. When he bottomed out, you were weak and he held your head in your hand as you lost all strength.
“You are a naughty girl,” He growled as he nuzzled your hair. 
He pulled back and thrust. He jolted your body and wiggled his hips as he splendoured in your warmth. He repeated the motion, each time jerking your body as you gagged noisily on his fingers. His other hand snaked under you and groped your tits, pinching sharply through dress and bra. The velvet of his coat rubbed your bare back and caught on your open zipper.
Soon, the whole bed shook with him. You mewled as you felt your core begin to bloom. You knew he felt it too as he sped up and his cock slid in and out smoothly. He drew his fingers from your mouth and gripped your neck instead. 
He forced your back to arch as he lifted himself to his knees, your legs propped open around them. He slapped your ass with his free hand as he rutted against you, his groans filled the air and he gripped your hip roughly. You latched onto the wrinkled blanket as your thighs buzzed and your climax rose sharply.
You came with a squeak, his hand still at your throat as he contorted your body. The pathetic sound only encouraged him and he fucked you faster and faster. It hurt but felt so good. You orgasmed again with a hiss, ashamed of your reaction to his intrusion.
He let go of your neck and pushed your head down into the mattress. He grabbed the back of your thong and snapped it with a yank. He freed it with another and held you down by your head as he pounded into. His groans grew louder and louder until he was roaring. 
The pleasured cries were muffled as he slammed into you so sharply you yelped. He spasmed and his thrust turned uneven. He slowed and you felt the flood inside of you. He pulled his hand away from your head and leaned back, his cock still in you as he panted. 
You turned your head to peek back at him. He held your thong to his face as he caught his breath, inhaling the scent of it. You closed your eyes and shakily reached up to try to drag yourself off of him. He caught your hips, the thong pressed against your skin.
“Ah ah,” He warned as he pulled you back to your limit. “Naughty girls must learn to be nice.”
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