#(i know that i'm probably gonna get a TON of hate for this)
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absolutedestinyapocalypsse · 7 months ago
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i love how as you read more into tlt, the ninth house seems more and more normal. Like if i'm at an immoral evil government competition, and i use human fat as soap and animate skeletons to do menial labor, i'm gonna LOSE if my competition is the third house, represented by ianthe "who HASN'T eaten human flesh and fucked a corpse" tridentarius. My weird skeleton thing seems normal, suddenly. Well-adjusted, even. It's recycling. They're using resources in a sustainable way. Normal and regular and productive for a post-climate change apocalypse universe.
People go on and on about how Muir drops you into gtn hearing from the person who knows the least about whats happening, and does not hand hold the reader through the crazy shit that occurs, and that's all true. It truly is a crazy writing decision to make your first pov character come from the universe's equivalent of amish fundamentalists. But the reader is actually done a huge favor being dropped into the ninth house first, because we already understand that space is cold and what catholic nuns are, and what goths look like, and what lesbians are. Very little time is wasted in the first chunk of gtn ripping hair out of your head wondering what the fuck is going on, because for all of its strangeness, the ninth house is already the most familiar thing we're gonna get.
Because THEN we learn that this whole universe's medieval chivalry system is designed to groom people from CHILDREN to not only be exploited and used as human batteries for necromancers, but to LIKE it. to wax poetic about it. to confuse it for love, to write fucking academic papers about it! Then we learn about planet flipping, an act so horrific and violent it turns the planet's soul into a massive vengeful monster capable of killing GOD. Like what do you MEAN the animals "change"? Is this why noodle has six legs? I would MUCH prefer to wear skeleton makeup and repent forever if the alternative was to witness my family dog grow TWO EXTRA LIMBS because the planet he lived on fucking died. Suddenly, living in the asscrack of a planet where no light gets in seems like a sweet deal when the whole solar system is lit by a sun that MAKES YOU GO CRAZY. The ninth house's WORST sin, killing 200 babies to make Harrow, a waste of resources and an act so terrible it haunts Harrow for the entire span of her life, is like a BLIP compared to the death count Jod's empire. God even hears about it and he's like, no big deal! The cohort probably kills that amount of people in a DAY.
And its ALSO tragic because you realize that all of this trauma and abuse that Gideon goes through is not really because of the ninth house at all. It's really just an individual skill issue that she wasn't treated with compassion. Nobody hated her because she's jesus or a bomb, nobody even KNOWS she's a bomb. It's just Priamhark and Pelleamena being deeply guilty and scared people that motivates her treatment, and absolutely nothing else.
They did something bad, and they know it, and Gideon survived it, and they can't kill her to cover it up, and that's IT. They killed themselves for pride, because they were afraid of the consequences of their actions (both the baby killing and Harrow opening the tomb) coming back to bite them. You can argue this is the catholicism of it all, and I wouldn't say you're wrong, but compared to the cavalier system, where exploitation is in the very lining of the house's institutions, the ninth house is really removed from the space empire's blood factory. This is compared to the fourth house where they have tons of children to be CANNON FODDER to join the cohort at fucking 14, compared to the eight house uncle nephew fuckery, even the fifth house which actually does seems nice to live on but also seems to have the fourth house in some sort of fucked up political bear hug??? (maybe the fourth house has so many kids in order to fight the fifth's battles? which is EXACTLY what jod's whole empire is about; politely stirring your tea and acting nice while you destroy everything) compared to ALL OF THAT, the cruelty that Gideon faces is really more a bug of the ninth's system than a feature.
There's nothing baked into the culture and everyday life of the ninth house that necessitated that cruelty; in fact, for such a pragmatic and resource-scarce place, it's WEIRD that a strong able-bodied young person was treated like a waste of space and resources. It could just have easily not happened, if Harrow's parents had been different people. Maybe they were products of their environment, but so was Harrow, and she values Gideon's life SO MUCH that she'd literally rather carve out parts of her own brain than exploit her. Gideon grows up knowing really NOTHING about cavaliers, so remote from the horrors of the empire that she develops an idea of what the cohort is from porn magazines. And in a lot of ways, that upbringing was desolate and terrible, and in a lot of other ways it literally DID NOT HAVE TO BE.
Gideon's MAIN THING is that she wants to be useful, to be needed, to be loved and it SUCKS that she couldn't even get it in the one place where she was actually an invaluable resource, where the death empire had the weakest reach. Gideon can't even blame her lack of love on the fucked up chivalry system like everyone else can because it JUST WASNT REALLY RELEVENT!?!?! This is like if i rolled up to the trauma competition and everyone else was raised in a nuclear warzone by wolves or something and i grew up in like, the suburbs and was raised by teachers and i somehow STILL WON. truly what the fuck guys.
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inkskinned · 8 months ago
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don't worry, they're joking! they're always joking when it would be something, like bigoted. because i'm not a bigot, obviously, i just vote for bigots - well, they're not bigots either, you can't really call someone a bigot just because they have religious views. this is the land of the free, and it's a christian nation, after all. you can pretend otherwise but let's just be real here; all our values are really based on the bible. anyway, i know you liberals get your panties in a twist - can i say that, or are you gonna cancel me, haha, #metoo - about every little joke he said and every little dramatic political view. oh, fascist this and fascist that. you are online too much, you love the word fascist because it's big and you're just paranoid about things.
well, no, i don't, like, read the policies. i have a life. and so what if they wrote - stop it, it's not a manifesto, okay? he eventually backed off from that - oh the vice president? who cares about that guy, that isn't real power. you're being dramatic, they're just spitballing. everyone makes big claims when they're out there campaigning. he just means he personally wouldn't get gay married. you want him to divorce his wife and get gay married? anyway, even if they cancelled gay marriage - it wouldn't happen, okay? nobody i know really cares about that - it'd be states-rights like those abortions you love so much. and you live in a blue state. you live in like the gay capital of the world. i don't know why it'd be so bad for you, you're borrowing trouble there.
and besides, you're missing the point of his campaign! you people want to be victims so bad you completely ignore what we're really voting for. there are tons of good things that happened because of his name and his policies - the economy, for one. oh stop, just because i can't tell you what a tariff is off the top of my head doesn't mean i don't have eyes. and stuff was better under him! well, yeah, anything good is his work, obviously. what? no, all the bad stuff was biden. and probably also obama. what do you even care about this, anyway? it's not going to effect you. it's four years.
oh my god, not the climate change argument again, i'm not getting into that. i don't care about it. if my house is beachfront that's great news for me. and we don't really know what's causing it. no, i saw you forwarded me those articles and i just laughed. what, do you think i have time to sit on my ass and read shit? huh? well, no, i like reading the babylon bee. they actually had a great article about all you climate freaks. and in the meantime, what do you want me to do? i'm not paying 4 dollars for gas. liberals love to talk about solutions but never pay for the solutions. what do you mean blocked because of congress. you gotta stop with the conspiracy shit.
no, my side doesn't have real conspiracy theories. the vaccine thing is a real thing. besides, you yourself don't like big pharma. just because i have an opinion, suddenly now you think big pharma is great? and this is serious, okay? your mom's friend's coworker has a kid that died from a heart event. i don't want you getting any more vaccines. i regret that you got them as a kid, i'd redo them. what do you mean you'd vaccinate your own kids? are you finally thinking of having some? you know i want grandkids - oh stop, i've never pressured you, i'm just saying that if you're going to get gay married, you might as well give me some normal grandkids to love.
stop, you know what i meant. what? no, he's not going to take away your right to adopt. besides, you could always use a sperm donor, haha, i know your high school ex would love to - jesus! okay! no need to snap. i'm just saying that you don't need to be married to have a kid. the only real benefit to marriage is taxes, haha. it won't change anything. oh my god, no, there won't be a rise in hate crimes. well, it's not his fault what people do in his name! he eventually spoke out against that, anyway.
what do you mean he supported them? i didn't hear him say that. oh. well, yeah, he said it, but like, he's clearly joking.
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violetarks · 1 year ago
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"they don't love me like you do!"
anime: jujutsu kaisen
character: gojo satoru
summary: despite the countless valentines day offers he receives, satoru will only ever accept one confession. but you're confessing... to his best friend?
warnings: g/n! reader, they/them pronouns used, high school! au
"please accept these chocolates, gojo!" says the girl in front of him. satoru casually pulls down his glasses enough to see the red, heart-shaped cardboard box.
"oh, uh... thank you." he awkwardly says. this girl was two year below him, judging by the colours of her indoor shoes. he didn't even know her name. "this is... a surprise."
"i've liked you ever since orientation day. i hope you like these." she says with a nervous grin. she's stiff as he takes them out of her hands, standing up straight to stare at the tall man. "thank you for always being so funny and helping everyone you can."
"ah, you're welcome." he says, tucking the chocolates and the letter taped to it under his arm. luckily, the lunch bell had rung and everyone should've been off to enjoy their break. "well, i'll... see you around."
"b—bye, gojo!" she calls, waving at him as he walks the other way. he gives a kind smile before he turns the corner, dropping it immediately.
on the way to class, multiple other students watched him as he carelessly skimmed through the letter before stuffing it in his book bag, ready to throw it (and the others) away once home. valentines day was this week and it was two days before it today. yet satoru had received tons of confession letters and date proposals, none of which he had the intention of accepting.
plopping down in his chair, he groans, hanging his head, "ugh! i hate being so loveable..."
suguru rolls his eyes, outting his book down. "here we go again." he grunts, shaking his head.
"seriously! why can't i be left alone around valentines day?" he questions out lout, pulling his lunch box from his bag.
shoko bites into her sandwich as she listens to him. as she swallows, she retorts, "maybe it's because you flirt with every living being on earth." satoru sends him a pointed look. "so how many letters today?"
"seven." satoru responds, knocking his bag.
"and?"
"none of them were from y/n." he sighs out, picking up his chopsticks.
"wait, y/n?" suguru pipes up, putting his juicebox down, "as in y/n from class d?"
the blue-eyed boy raises a brow, halting his movements. "uh, yeah? l/n y/n." he recalls to his friend, tilting his head, "what? i've been talking about 'em for the past three months—suguru, have you been listening to me at all?"
"oh!" the dark-haired boy chuckles, nodding his head, "i know y/n. we're in the same literature class."
satoru stares at him in disbelief. the other students surrounding them are in their own little world, but the three of them didn't even mind them hearing if they tried. shoko continues to eat her food while suguru shrugs at his friend.
"are you kidding me?" satoru gasps out, waving a hand in the air, "i've been trying to get with them for three months and you tell me this just now?"
"you should've been more specific, man." suguru retorts, waving it off, "anyway, you gonna' ask them to be your valentine?"
satoru sighs loudly, hanging his head back, "i don't know... we only share bio together, i bet there's a lot of people who have asked them to be their valentine. they probably won't even accept mine."
shoko purses her lips and stretches her arms. "i don't know about that." she claims, "you're a pretty guy and everyone knows you. i doubt they'd pass up the chance to revel in that popularity."
"... thanks, shoko."
soon enough, the bell rings and the day goes on.
the next day, satoru notices something in your hand during biology class.
"whatchu' got there, y/n?" he asks, peaking over your shoulder. he sat behind you, enough room to see the handwritten letter you were writing.
"satoru!" you jump a little, covering the page. he furrows his brow. "it's, uh... i'm just writng something."
"is it... for valentines day tomorrow?" he inquires, curious to who was the lucky person. but you were still hiding it from him!
"no, of course not." you were lying, he could tell by the way you look to the left. a pout falls on his lips. "it's notes. for another class."
"oh... okay." he responds, a bit disappointed. why would you lie to him? he sits back in his chair, writing down some paragraphs from the textbook mindlessly. he saw the way your elbow quickly shifted, you were writing faster. your head was down too, never looking up. you were so concentrated.
he's known you for a couple of months now. you bumped into him on the way to school, and you admitted to him that you were a bit lost since you didn't live around here. satoru, being the gentleman he is, offered to escort you. you thought he was some creep (he tried reaching to hold your hand and when you jerked away on instinct, he played it off as it being the wind).
but once realising you two shared some classes together, you grew fond of him. you knew of the countless students throwing themselves at him. both older and younger. he was the school heartthrob. it's a shame though, only your smile could make his heart race like he makes others do.
when you gave him your lucky pen when he told you he didn't study and he was freaking out, you had this kind smile that made him think 'i don't want anyone else to see this but me'.
and he noticed that you awkwardly took it back from him, looking away as he clasped your hands tightly in the filled hallway and thanked you. your reactions were just the cutest...
when the bell rings, you perk up, putting your 'notes' in a suspicious looking envelope and signing it off with something. you stand up and satoru is quick to walk by your side when a classmates holds his arm to talk.
"huh?" satoru grunts, furrowed brows.
"gojo, i... i wanted to give you this." they say, holding out a teddy-bear saying 'be my valentine!'. satoru frowned when he took it. "you don't have to answer today... just let me know tomorrow, please."
as they continue to talk, he sees you exit the classroom. the letter sits comfortably in your palm, and you look left, right, before walking off. satoru is electrified.
"okay, thanks!" he says, running out of the classroom while he clutches the bear in his hands.
weaving through the crowd, he looks for the top of your head. after more and more people pass him, staring at the teddy and whispering 'who gave that to him this time?', he spots you turning the corner, a nervous look on your face. he mutters out apologies as he bumps into people heading to their next class.
the hallway you're in now is empty. you stand in front of a classroom door, waiting. notably, suguru's math class.
satoru stands at the end of the corridor, behind the corner, as the classroom door opens to reveal his best friend, geto suguru.
"suguru!" you call, smile. your shoulders are straightened, you hold the letter in front of you. not scared to show him...
"oh, y/n, hey." he responds, grinning as well. the comfortability around you two was so strange to see. "what's up?"
satoru feels like he's buzzing out. he can't hear everything you're saying, but you look a bit excited yet anxious. he hears your sweet voice speak to his best friend with such kindness that he's jealous. sure, suguru was attactive and nice and he definitely didn't feed into the popularity like satoru did, but...
why did it have to be you who was interested in him?
"please, take this." you say, handing him the same letter you had before. except this time, satoru sees the 'g.s' on it. 'geto suguru'. and you take out a box of his favourite snacks to hand to him. "thank you for everything, again. you're the best."
suguru takes it with ease, seeing how you looked at him. his gaze softens as he takes the treat as well. "you're welcome, y/n. anything you need, i'll help with." he puts the letter in his own bag before slinging am arm around your shoulders. "now, what're your plans for after?"
he was blatantly asking you out now! right after satoru told him he had feelings for you! such betrayal!
you two walk to the other end of the hallway, in the direction of your literature class. satoru slumps against the wall, furrowed brows and lips pressed into a thin line. after a second, he pushes his glasses up and lets out a slow exhale. he could get over this...
"gojo! may i please have a moment of your time?"
"wait no! me first!"
"gojo, can i talk to you?"
"please accept these!"
or maybe he couldn't.
valentines day was today and you danced into school with such confidence. you had a bouquet of flowers in your arms, chocolates of the sweetest kinds, and a bag of new perfume that you knew your crush would like.
you were so excited.
satoru, who was walking a few people behind you, was not.
he saw the amount of passion you put into the holiday, and it made him sick to know it was for his best friend. the guys was in such a bad mood, he ignored suguru and shoko's calls this morning to meet up and walk to school together like usual.
satoru clicked his tongue, thinking about how dramatic the whole valentines day idea was. really, who needed it all anyway?
in homeroom, he can hear your class (which is next to his, across the hall) start whooping and cheering when you walk in. and he knows it's you by the chants of your last name being heard. he sits in his chair in anguish.
"satoru, morning. finally." shoko says, sitting down as well. she grins, bitting the popsicle stick between her lips. "where are all of your valentines presents?"
"stuffed in my shoe locker and under my desk." he claimed, opening the top of it to showcase the blaring red and pink gifts. she picked at one pocky box, munching on the biscuits. "how about you?"
"i got a couple letters and cookies in my locker." she claims, shrugging her shoulders, "lots of 'em are from the badminton team. i don't know why."
satoru shrugs as well as soon as suguru sits down in front of him. the blue-eyed students scoffs, looking away.
"good morning, satoru." he says, noticing his friend's behaviour, "what's got his panties in a twist this morning? does he know we called him a hundred times?"
"i dunno'." shoko says, looking out the window to the school garden. "ask him."
"satoru, what's wrong? didn't get enough presents this year?" he teases, leaning in his chair to poke his head, "wake up late?"
but satoru angrily swats his hand away. the raven-haire boy blinks curiously before satoru glares at him. "why didn't you tell me you were interested in y/n?" he asks, hurt.
shoko looks back to the two boys, seeing suguru just as confused as she is. "you're into y/n?"
"what? no! who said that?" suguru retorts, hands up in defense, "i'm not interested in dating y/n, swear on my life."
"that's a lie!" satoru accuses, pointing a finger against his friend's nose, "shoko, i saw him and y/n all... all... familiar yesterday after period 2! he had his arm around them!"
"suguru..." shoko warns.
"wait wait, that's—you got it all wrong." suguru groans, now understanding. he digs through his bag and pulls out a piece of paper. "here. open it."
satoru pushes away the paper reading 'g.s'. "no way! i'm not reading y/n's love letter to you!"
"ugh! just open it!" suguru grunts, shoving it onto his desk.
satoru begrudgingly takes it and gently opens the letter, not wanting to rip it. once his eyes fall upon the page, he confirms that it's your handwriting.
'thank you for being the sweetest boy to me. i am truly honoured to know such a beautiful person, inside and out.'
satoru wants to barf.
'sitting near you in biology really helped me to understand you, satoru. you're not only a pretty face, but a world-class sweet tooth, a sucker for romantic cliches and a cologne-collector.'
satoru thinks this is the most beautiful thing he's ever read.
he contiues to read, expression changing, letting shoko and suguru understand his thoughts. the girl looks to the other boy, who shrugs his shoulders and rolls his eyes.
"i'm confused." shoko states, tilting her head.
"y/n isn't confessing to me, they're confessing—"
"y/n is confessing to me! me, satoru!" satoru exclaims, waving the letter around like a maniac. everyone else in the class was suddenly a listener, peaking at the trio. they were interested in finding out what the one confession that resulted in this reaction was. "oh my god, oh my god!"
suguru nods his head. placing a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. "yes, yes, they are. i was meant to give you the letter this morning to read before homeroom, but someone was pissy." he scoffs, shaking his head, "so i had to go and tell y/n that plans had changed."
"you... helped y/n plan this all out?" satoru mumbles, "but you didn't even know!"
shoko chuckles, staring out the window again.
"i just said i wasn't paying attention so you didn't think i was snooping. which i was. and i only told you i knew y/n so you wouldn't get any ideas, like this." suguru circles the air with his finger, deadpanning at the clueless satoru, "you think anyone would do this without definitive proof the other person liked them?"
satoru continues to read the letter you wrote for him before his eyes land on the ending. "'please meet me at the school fountain before homeroom ends.'" he murmurs out, blinking, "suguru—"
"you were meant to go two minutes ago." his friend sings out, standing in front of shoko's desk. he points out the window, much like other students were doing in their own classrooms. "you should..."
when his friends turn around to him, satoru is already one foot out of the door. he's rushing downstairs (down three flights of stairs, actually) with your letter clutched in his hand. he almost flies into a couple teachers on the way to the garden, only for their attention to be caught by students opening the windows and pointing outside.
when he rushed through the doors to the garden, you're staring at the floor, still holding the flowers and gifts you brought to school with you. taking a moment to gather himself, satoru runs fingers through his hair and fixes his glasses. the pair you've complimented a thousand times.
satoru walks closer to you and when he catches your eye, you stand up straight and smile.
"satoru." you chime, not missing the thousand pairs of eyes that were following your every move. "good morning. happy valentines day."
you hold out the flowers to him. it's set in a nice box, and the treats are in a gift bag. when you give it to him, your smile is awkward but hopeful.
"happy valentines day, y/n." he replies, taking it from you. he sits down on the fountain edge, and you follow along. "i'm so sorry, i... i don't have anything for you."
"no, no, no." you retort, grinning, "it's fine. this was a surprise for you, anyway."
he sighs, "no, i'm sorry... please, let me make it up to you."
you laugh a little, placing a hand over his on his lap. the flowers were sat on the fountain with his gifts. "sure thing." you retort, "hey, suguru told me that this morning—"
"i'm sorry, i know, i just thought..." he begins, cutting you off. he looks embarrassed, heavy blush falling over his cheeks. "i saw you and suguru yesterday and you gave him that letter. had me thinkin' you were confessing to him instead of me."
you let out a small chuckle, making him gulp, "oh my goodness, i'm sorry, i didn't mean for you to see that. we were trying to be sneaky."
satoru's chest feels lighter, and he feels better just hearing it from you. he links his fingers with yours, facing you fully.
"ah, no it's fine." he tells you, the most purest form of adoration in his eyes that you can see from the top of his slanted down glasses. you grin softly. "listen, i have had a crush on you for months... and i was hoping that you'd go out with me. i want a chance to get to know you personally, away from any prying eyes."
you peer to the side, seeing the people watching you. they were practically hanging out the window, waving their hands and fighting to view the whole scene for themselves. cameras took photos and videos, capturing your moment with him.
"i'd love that, satoru." you say, scanning his face, "you're the best."
it only takes him a single second to reach his hand out and brush his thumb agaisnt your cheek. you don't freeze up though, only relaxing into him. he was the most inviting guy you've ever met.
"can i kiss you?" he asks, voice unwavering. his blue eyes are staring at your face with such kindness that it cannot be described.
you don't even say anything, only leaaning forward and pressing your lips to his. he's smiling against your lips, gentle hand caressing your cheek. your eyes flutter shut, holding his hand tightly.
cheers erupt from the school. screams and whoops from guys and girls alike. most students are heartbroken due to the obvious confession. nobody had even gotten that close to satoru. no one has been able to hold his hand, let alone get him to go crazy over a letter. you got him to race out of that classroom like a madman, and everyone was surely surprised.
the shouts die down as the kiss deescalates, many of the students sighing as they're forced to move on from the heart-throb gojo satoru.
when you pull away, satoru chases, leaving a gentle kiss against your forehead. your smile is wide and you pinch his cheek softly.
"you're such a drama queen, satoru." you say, standing up, "i was wondering why everyone started yelling and staring at me all of a sudden."
satoru stands with his presents, rubbing the back of his neck as he holds your hand. h goes to answer when a voice is heard from the fourth floor.
"the idiot took some convincing, y/n!" suguru shouts, waving his hand, "glad to know he's got some sense in him!"
"shut up, suguru!" satoru calls back, showing his fist.
"first period is about to start, you two!" the principle says through a window on the third floor, "this is all heart-warming, but you've failed two of ms kinoshita's classes, gojo!"
"r—right!" he retorts, pacing to the school entrance as people begin to 'ooh' at him. he looks back at you, smiling the brightest. "let's go out after school today, yeah? i'll buy you as many sweets as you want."
you chuckle, kissing his cheek, "my hero."
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itz-mfkn-de · 10 months ago
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\\ALWAYS YOU//. M.R
warnings— OOC MATTHEO, Im a sucker for toxic boys but I made him extra sweet in his one idk why, uhhh not many tbh, cussing, kissing, smoking, that’s all I think.
summary— Mattheo was your best friend, always had been, but was the title of ‘friend’ enough?
-my first work for Mattheo! I will eventually get a master list going once I get more comfertable posting on here. This is a repost of one of my works on wattpad, just with some tweaks bc that work was olldddd-
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You sat against mattheos 𝐛𝐞𝐝, 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 out of his dorm window.
"You know, some times, I'm worried for you. You just stare at things, it's weird." He snickered  as he took a drag from his cigarette.
You looked at him and scoffed, "Sometimes I'm worried about your lungs, you're bound to get some type of problem with all that's smoking you do." You half-joked, glancing at him.
He rolled his eyes, tilting his head up and blew the smoke out of his mouth.
"Seriously Mattheo, that stuff is absolute horse-shit for your body." You stated, accompanying your words with a sharp glare.
"I don't do it that often, just when I'm stressed." He muttered, taking his feet off of his desk and turning his body to face you.
"What happened to the whole 'I don't give a fuck about anything or anybody but myself' thing?" You said, mocking him to the best of your abilities.
"First of all I don't fucking sound like that," he laughed and squinted at you "second, just stressed about life, nothing in particular." 
You softly chuckled at his reaction. His eyes broke from yours, looking at some papers on his desk. Your eyes, however, never left his frame. You could stare at him for eternity, everything about his face seemed so perfect, almost as if it were meant to be admired.
You soon realized your staring and quickly averted your gaze towards the window again.
"You gonna go to the Yule ball this year?" You broke the silence, you knew Mattheo hated those things, he hated having to be around a shit ton of people and act like he enjoyed their company.
"Probably not." His demeanor changed, his tone became short, almost snappy.
"Oh, I'm probably just gonna go with Becca." You mumbled, knowing that if no guy was to ask you, Becca had your back.
"Hm." He nearly laughed at your remark.
"What? What's so funny?" You asked, looking back at him, his back still facing you.
"Just surprised you aren't going with a random slytherin guy or something." He answered, but the way he had said it has a strange undertone that you weren't sure how to feel about.
"Well I mean I don't know, I haven't been asked yet." You stated truthfully.
"Ah, I see." He murmured, soon after taking another drag of his cigarette.
You felt tension building in the room, suffocating tension. You weighed your options out, but you decided it would be better to give Mattheo some space, for what you were unsure of.
"Well, Becca and Emma told me they wanted to go dress shopping earlier so I think I'm gonna head over there so we can solidify our plans." You announced while picking up your books and putting them in your bag. 
"Bye Mattheo." You said while walking out of his dorm, expecting a response.
You shut the door when you got nothing, you mind raced with the possibilities on what could've caused mattheos strange behavior.
Maybe he'd just had an off day? No that couldnt have been it, he was fine moments before his attitude took a turn. 
Perhaps he was just having mood swings, you wouldn't be surprised with all the trash he puts in his body.
You stuck with that story and walked back to your dorm, which was on the other side of the slytherin tower. 
You reached it, setting your things down, then quickly turned around and nearly raced to your friends dorm.
The second you reached it, You waisted no time to jump on her bed, causing her to jump. 
"Yes, of course you can come into my room unannounced and lay on my bed." Becca said sarcastically. She had been digging through her closet in an attempt to find a dress. 
"Sorry, I just need to vent." You said while propping yourself up on your elbows.
"Go ahead." She sighed and laid her body weight 
"Okay so, there's this guy. He's like my best friend, but.."
She raised her eyes brows, signaling you to continue.
"But I want us to be more, or atleast I see him as more than a friend. I just feel like no matter how hard I try I can't get him to open up, he just.. won't."  You groaned.
"And everytime I get this sliver of hope that I've made progress, he just completely shuts down, leaving me in the dark confused and a little bit heartbroken!" You borderline screamed, your face shoved into her mattress.
"Okay, uh, let's calm down. If he's not showing any signs of being interested maybe you should just, move on- well attempt to at least." Becca stated ,rubbing your back.
You shut your eyes, truly taking in your friends words.  “hey Yknow what will make you feel better?” She nearly jumped with excitement. “Going to look for a dress in town.”
You knew she only had good intentions but the words kept echoing through your head. The thought of keeping Mattheo as a friend hurt, but it seemed to be all you could do at this point without ruining your friendship.
Maybe she was right.
Maybe you needed to accept Mattheo 
was just a friend.
-
All you could think about was the Yule ball. Over the next few weeks the days flew by, the anticipation growing larger with each one passing.
Of course you had been asked by some sweet guy from the Ravenclaw house, and, taking Becca's advice, you said yes.
There was nothing wrong with him, he just..he wasn't him.
You had decided to get ready alone, slipping into a beautiful green dress you and Becca had picked out. You finished your hair and makeup, looking into your vanity mirror.
You felt beautiful.
You smiled softly at how well you had dolled yourself up.
Glancing up at the clock, you rushed out of your dorm room, realizing it was the time you and your date had agreed to meet at the entrance by. 
You walked gracefully through the halls, a large smile adorning your face. Your heels tapped softly against the ground. You neared the entrance, your breath becoming shallow from the nerves. 
Then you saw Becca, she was wearing a beautiful Maroon dress. She looked absolutely breath taking.
"Hey!— oh my gosh." Becca looked at you, her jaw dropping. 
"You look stunning! Like some type of goddess...." She said barely above a whisper.
"Becca! Stop, you can't be talking, I forgot how to breathe the moment I saw you." You hugged her.
You were about to continue praising her and her beauty, but before you could comment you heard someone call your name.
"Y/n..wow.." he said, just loud enough for you to hear.
You turned around to see your date, who was wearing a very clean red and black suit. 
"Oh my gosh hi! Sorry for being a tad late, I lost track of time while getting ready!" You made your way next to your date, not before Becca gave you a sly smile and a push, leaving to go with her specimen she had chose for the night 
"It's okay.., you look amazing." He had said, taking your arm into his. He began to lead you into the ballroom.
"Thank you, I must say, you cleaned up nice." You smiled sweetly at him.
You and him entered the large room full of people, everything was elegant and royal, not a single speck of dust on anything.
You looked around the large room as your date led you down the stairs, you couldn't lie, you felt like a princess. The beautiful architecture of the room, complimented by your stunning dress, felt like something straight out of a fairy tale.
Once you had made it to the bottom of the staircase, you excused yourself away from your date in an attempt to go find Becca again. 
You stumbled past groups of people, many of them were couples having a romantic moment. 
You tried your best not to run into anybody, you dodged dancing bodies and nearly jogged across the dance floor.
You almost missed him.
You almost walked right by him.
You almost could've saved yourself the heartbreak.
But no you saw it—him with some random Hufflepuff girl. 
The way he whispered in her ear, the way she giggled a little too sweetly, everything. 
It all made you wanna cry—or throw up, which one that would be you weren't quite sure about yet. 
"Y/n?" Theodore came beside you and patted your back.
"Theo-Theodore, I thought Mattheo wasn't coming to the dance?" You struggled to get your words out as your eyes darted between the scene before you and Theodore. 
"Oh—uh yeah, he wasn't gonna originally, but some girl asked him and I guess he took a liking to her because usually he just brushes everyone off." Theo answered.
"Oh, I see, I just came to say hello. I'll be on my way now." Before Theodore could argue with your strange behavior you turned your back and walked as quickly as you could back to were your date was. 
You abandoned the idea of going to find Becca, you couldn't accidentally run into Mattheo and his.. friend again.
Instead you decided that distracting yourself with your date would be the best thing for your heart at the moment.
"Hey, sorry , I just saw a friend and got distracted." You said, out of breath.
"Oh. Don't even sweat it, I'm just glad you didn't run away and not come back." He joked, dragging you towards the dance floor. You couldn't help but laugh at his bubbly personality. It was a nice change of speed.
"I hope you like to dance." His hands fell onto your hips, yours made their way to his shoulders.
"I actually hate it." You smiled at him. 
"How unfortunate." Your smile grew when he matched your energy. You nearly forgot what you had seen a couple moments ago.
But alas, you didn't.
You could feel your chest tightening up, the tears bordering you waterline. Just thinking about him touching that girl in any way made you want to breakdown.
"Ex.—excuse me." You tried to excuse yourself as politely as you could. 
You didn't want your date too see you like this, vulnerable, heartbroken.
You urgently walked towards any door in your line of sight. When you finally found one, you ran through it. 
You just couldn't escape him, no matter how hard you tried. He was at every single corner you turned.
You nearly groaned when you saw him propped up over the balcony, smoking of course. 
He hasn't seemed to notice you, still looking out at the stars. 
You couldn't do it anymore, you couldn't spend one more fucking second acting like you weren't in love with him. 
The sad part was you'd rather be his friend than him hate you and be nothing at all. As long as he thought about you, you'd be okay. 
That's what you had been telling yourself, but you couldn't hold onto that lie anymore. 
"Mattheo." You croaked out behind him.
His head shot to the side, looking you dead in the eyes. 
"Angel… what're you doing out here."  He looked back out to the stars, unable to make eye contact. 
"I can't do it anymore."  You said shakily.
He turned his full body around this time, his eyes a dark brown. He blew the smoke out of his mouth, the wind pushing it in the opposite direction.
"I can't keep pretending I don't feel this way.., do you know how hard it was to watch you talk to that girl?" You nearly cried out.
"All the girls you fuck with and then bring them to shit like this, I cant keep lying to myself —wishing that it was me instead of her."
You were on the brink of gasping for air, your head pounded. You couldn't believe you had suppressed these emotions for so long. Every single time you went to Mattheo's dorm, you could barely restrain yourself from kissing him. 
Before you could continue on with your speech 
Mattheo had forced you against the wall. 
His lips met yours in a harsh collision. In an almost immediate reaction, your body responded to his actions, kissing him back with just as much need and hurry.
"You don't get to fucking do that."  He pulled back from your lips, still making sure to keep his face mere inches from yours.
"Every single day, I'd sit there and watch you talk to this new guy, I couldn't do shit about it— I wouldn't let myself do shit about it."
“I knew you deserved so much better than some lousy asshole like me, angel.” His hand held a firm grip on your hips, his other still had its place on the stone wall. 
"It took everything in me not to punch that fucker in the face when I saw him look at you, but I knew you wouldn't want that." You melted beneath his gaze.
His kisses trailed down your jawline.
"During second year, when I went to the dance, I saw you there with Draco, I nearly killed him right after. I couldn't bear to see you with anyone other than myself.. so I wouldn't go, I knew I wouldn't be able to handle it so I never went to another ball again." He gently caressed your cheek with his thumb.
"Until this year." He mumbled softly in between the kisses he was leaving on your neck.
He brought his face back up to yours, his eyes stormy and clouded with something darker than just simple need.
"What'd he say to you? What did he call you?" Mattheo asked with a dark shimmer in his eyes, one you were hoping was just from the moon.
You swallowed harshly, you hadn't realized how dry your mouth truly was. 
"He just said I looked nice—" 
"Nice? You look fucking ravishing. I've never met a girl as beautiful as you, never once in my life seen a girl who could compare anywhere near you...That's why I call you angel you know...,because even if an angel walked by, my eyes would still be glued on you."
His gentle voice tickled your ears, and your cheeks warmed up beneath him.
"You are my angel."
He kissed you again, only this time it was more gentle. His lips held no rush, they were soft and comforting. 
You were the one to pull back this time, smiling sweetly up at him. He pulled you from against the wall, leaving the two of you in the center of the balcony, under the sparkling stars.
"I can't believe we've been friends all these years, and neither of us made a move."
He spun you around under the moon light, the beautiful sky knocking the breath out of you.
"Hey matty..?”You whispered once he had began to hold you in his arms gently.
"Yes angel?" He matched your tone, the sweet nickname you gave him made his chest tighten up.
"I love you." You closed your eyes, shutting them slowly.
"I love you... I always thought I'd never be the type to say that so freely, guess I just needed to meet the right person." He swayed the two of you lightly, finding a rhythm in the midnight winds. 
"Of course it's you... 
It's always been you."
314 notes · View notes
xbellaxcarolinax · 2 years ago
Text
Futile Devices
Miguel O'Hara x civilian f!reader
Summary: The deal was explicitly no strings attached. You were finding it harder to keep up your end of the bargain. 
Word Count: 8.2k (A behemoth of a fic, I'm so sorry guys)
Warnings: FWB, language, angst, reader is totally in love with Miguel, Miguel being a bit of an ass, probably a tad toxic? SMUT, p in v (no protection), cum play, low-key breeding kink? Like super low-key. Oral (f receiving). Miguel climbing through windows. Idk why I'm obsessed with that thought lmfao I make him climb through windows every chance I get. Idiots in love. Probably a rushed ending, sorry!
Thanks to @whatthefishh for beta-reading. Partly inspired by this.
Also, this is mega ultra cliche, we all know they're gonna end up together, so just enjoy the ride! It's not the destination, it's the journey 😌 Hope you guys enjoy, and if you do, pls let me know what you think! I love reading your comments!
MDNI pls.
...
It was always a mission getting to Miguel's office.
Headquarters wasn't built to accommodate civilians, the winding pathways and corridors a danger if one wasn't too careful.
You had to be extra careful. 
You hurried toward Miguel's office, heels clicking against clean tiled floors as you dodged a fuck ton of spider people and the inescapable attention of one annoying Peter Parker.
"Come on," Peter Parker number two hundred tried his luck again, "just one date. I’ll take you anywhere you wanna go." 
"No." You rolled your eyes, swatting him with the manilla folder in your hands like you would a fly. 
“Look, all I’m saying is you should give me a shot. I’m funny.”
“So is every other Peter Parker I’ve encountered.”
“I’m different.”
“I doubt it.” 
He deflated, keeping up with your quick steps. “Who doesn’t like funny guys?”
“Me.”
“Sure,” he stretched the word out, unconvinced, "so if not funny guys then what? The ones with sticks up their asses, like Miguel?" He snorted with a shake of his head. You knew it was a sort of rhetorical question but you couldn’t help swallowing thickly, your hands gripping the folder a little too tightly. 
Yeah. Something like that.
You felt your heart drop to your stomach when Peter Parker two hundred raised his brows at your silence. So maybe he did want an answer.
"Nah, there's no way. I'll try again tomorrow." He smiled, shooting a web out in some random direction and swinging off toward the floor above. 
Fuck. That was close.
You breathed a sigh of relief, loosening your fingers over the folder before quickly hurrying toward your destination. 
You pressed your watch against the sensor outside of Miguel's office, waiting for the metal door to slide open. It didn't. You tried again. Still nothing. Again. It wouldn't budge.
"Ugh, come on, Miguel!" You banged the door with a tiny fist as if that would make a difference, "open up!" 
Lyla appeared suddenly, her sprite-like form circling your head once before she faced you.
"You probably shouldn't go in there," she warned, "he's in a…mood." 
"He’s always in a mood," your hands were on your hips now, the manilla folder crinkling further in your hand, "I need to report a couple of grievances—"
"Mmmmmm, I'm sure that's the last thing he wants to hear right now, Miss HR." God you hated when they called you that. You rolled your eyes, swatting her away with the folder which did nothing, of course, and pressed your watch against the sensor. 
"That's not gonna work, honey."
"So let me in." 
"Promise to be nice?"
"To who?" You snorted, "You or Miguel?" 
"Me," Lyla grinned, adjusting her heart-shaped glasses, "forget Miguel." 
You sighed, cracking a smile, "Lyla, would you please let me into Miguel's office?" The Ai made a noise of approval, comically saluting you before granting you access.
"Don't say I didn't warn ya." She sang, disappearing from your sight. 
You sighed. Miguel's shifting moods were nothing new to you—not anymore. Back when you both worked at Alchemax, he was passive and less quick to anger. But that seemed a lifetime ago. 
Life progresses. People change.
“Mig?” You called out, peering up toward his solitary platform. You could hear the soft hisses of machinery, the yellow glow of Miguel’s holo screens illuminating the area above like a radiant star.
He didn’t answer. 
“Miguel,” you tried again, “we have some things to discuss.” You slapped the manilla folder against your hand as if he’d recognize the sound of formal complaints filed within the last week. 
The platform began to descend after a moment, and you breathed a sigh of relief as his figure came into view. His shoulders were stiff, his body rigid as he swiped through the yellow screens.
“I told Lyla not to let anyone in.” His voice was cold, frigid even. He didn’t bother to face you, his eyes pinned to his screens as he leaned forward, the muscles of his back flexing through his suit. 
You couldn’t see what he was looking at but you could hear it: the soft giggles of a little girl, the cheers of a soccer game, the chuckles of a man now broken. It wasn’t the first time you’d heard the sounds of Miguel’s past. It probably wouldn’t be the last either.
“I-uh, got some reports to share with you.” You felt foolish. Lyla was right. HR complaints were the last thing on Miguel’s mind. 
“Reports of the anomaly on Earth 9811?” Your brows pinched in irritation. He knew those weren’t the reports you had. You were fucking HR, not on active duty, let alone a spider person. 
"No, you'd have to ask Jess or Gwen about that, but you need to listen—"
“I don’t want to hear it.” He grunted. You saw his hands form fists at his sides, the same hands that’d fisted your sheets in the throes of pleasure just days ago. 
You shook your head. It was not the time for that kind of thought. 
You carefully opened the crinkled folder, pulling out the paperwork you’d printed from your antique printer to read aloud from it.
“Peter Parker of Earth 5431-02 has formally filed a complaint,” you began, your eyes scanning the black text before releasing an exasperated sigh, “he’s saying you threw a chair at him?” Miguel grunted, the holo screens shutting off at his (Lyla’s) command.
“He’s an idiot.” Miguel snapped, finally turning to face you, his sharp features shadowed by the lack of light. He regarded you carefully, red eyes tracing your figure. You’ve grown used to the way his eyes lingered over you, especially when you were under him, his body pressed against yours, but sometimes you couldn’t help but squirm under his more severe gaze.
“Well, yeah,” you reluctantly agreed with a tilt of your head, “but a chair, Miguel?”
“It’s not like it hurt him...badly.”
“That's not the point."
“The point is that I got my point across.” Miguel snorted. 
"It's the principle. You don't go around throwing fucking chairs at the people who work for you!" 
"Mhm." 
"You're their boss! What kind of behavior is that?"
"Uh-huh." 
You were about ready to strangle him but knew your fingers couldn’t even go around his throat properly. You’ve tried before, under very different circumstances. You settled for pinching the bridge of your nose, as he often did, taking a breath to calm yourself before you completely lost your shit. "Listen to me."
"I'm listening, HR."
"Ugh, look," you pointed a finger up toward him, your brows knitted in obvious irritation, "annoying or not, he's still a member of the Spider Society, therefore, he has every right—”
“—to file a grievance under any circumstance as a result of an injustice, discrimination, or harmful behavior, and is to be given the respect to which every spider person is due as a valued member of the society. I know.” Miguel finished the legal jargon for you, hopping off the platform with an ease that’d always surprised you.
He stepped into your space, his large body casting a long shadow over you as he snatched the crinkled paperwork from your hands. 
“I’ll speak with him.” He grunted. You pursed your lips, watching as his eyes scanned over the page.
"Make it right, Mig. Apologize. Formally. Or informally. It doesn’t matter— there’s nothing normal about this place anyway.” You placed your hands on your hips as you leaned forward, aware of how he was suddenly gazing down at you. “Just be nice, okay? Compensate him with, I dunno, a minor mission. He always wants to get involved, so let him.” 
Miguel rolled his eyes, heaving a great sigh while running his hand through his hair. “Fine.”
“And no more throwing chairs to make a point.”
“Uh-huh, fine, anything else?” God, you wanted to smack him. You opted for snatching back the paperwork from his hand, smoothing out the wrinkles over your skirt-clad thighs before searching for the proper page.
“Yeah," you brought a finger down on the page, "the spiders are getting bored of the cafeteria food.” That was enough for Miguel's face to pinch in displeasure.
“What’s wrong with empanadas and churros?” He scoffed, waving his hand to dismiss the complaint, “And that stupid blue burger with my face on it?” He paused, eyes squinting for a moment, “You know what? That can go. Get rid of it.”
“Fine. Do I have permission to organize a survey?”
“For food?” 
“Yes, for food. They want options.” 
“Aye, por Dios,” Miguel grunted, waving his hand again, “Fine.” 
“Fine.” 
“Anything else?” 
“Nope.” You organized the documents back into the manila folder before handing it over to him.
“You know you could just send this electronically, right?” He looked down at the folder, his eyes tracing your neat cursive in black ink.
“I’m old-fashioned.” You shrugged, turning on your heels. You heard him snort out a laugh, a tiny thing that made you smile. He has a nice laugh.
“One more thing,” Miguel called out, demandingly. You looked over your shoulder at him as he regarded you with heavy eyes.
“What is it?” 
He boarded the platform once again, the machinery coming to life and slowly elevating him back to his preferred height. He tossed the folder somewhere over the desk, to be forgotten. It was the least of his worries at that moment.
You watched Miguel ascend above you like some kind of heavenly being, the yellow light of the holo screens illuminating his tan skin till he glowed molten gold. You waited on him with bated breath, his response sinking straight to your core.
“Keep your window unlocked tonight.” 
He loves it when you ride him. 
His large hands were glued to your hips as you bounced on him expertly, your cunt soaking him in your sticky juices. 
Most nights began this way—with Miguel's cock buried deep in your pussy after a long day of enduring his insufferable attitude. You'd fuck the stress out of him—fuck the astronomical weight of the multiverse off his shoulders if only for a few short hours.
"Been thinking about this all day." He groaned under you, throwing his head back over your pillow when he felt your walls grip his length viciously, fighting to keep him in.
"Yeah?" You gasped, your hands firmly planted on his bare chest as you made work of your hips, rotating them in delicious circles—the way he liked—your thighs spread wide to accommodate his massive size. "W-wasn't enough to curb that a-attitude though, huh?" 
Even amid the utmost pleasure—of Miguel's length hitting a spot that had you trembling—you found the strength to taunt him, your hazy eyes catching a glimpse of the twitch in his brow. That meant trouble.
Within seconds Miguel had you on your back, his imposing body trapping you against your mattress. His cock slipped out for a moment but he had no problem finding his way back into your slippery channel, snapping his hips strategically to reach as deep as he could.
You cried out, your hands scrambling to find purchase over his shoulders, your pretty manicured nails digging into his perfectly golden skin.
"F-fuck! Miguel!"
"Wanna say that again?" He growled, his face hovering mere centimeters from yours, "Go ahead, say it again." You did nothing but whimper as he pounded into you mercilessly, his cock stretching you open. 
"That's what I thought." Miguel chuckled smugly, delighting in your little chokes and stutters, egging him to keep pounding you relentlessly. You tried speaking—tried to articulate your words to him, but you couldn't, too cock drunk to focus on anything else but his gorgeous face twisted up in pleasure and his thick cock kissing the secret place within you.
He had you coming soon after, stars exploding behind your lids as you trembled in his arms. Your cunt squeezed him just right and he came, panting in your ear as he filled you to the brim. 
His spend stained your sheets when he pulled out, and as always, he watched it dribble out from your swollen cunt with lidded eyes. He wasted no time in taking his fingers and stuffing the mess back in.
“Keep me in there.” He muttered, swiping through your puffy folds one final time before he ripped himself from you. You immediately soured, keeping your gaze on him as he quickly cleaned himself off with a cloth you left for him on your nightstand. 
You admired his figure: the ripple of his muscles as he moved, the broadness of his shoulders, the glow of his skin in the dim lighting of your bedroom. 
Miguel was gorgeous. You’ve always thought so.
His suit glitched before coming to life, covering his sculpted body in the usual blue and red you've come to know. 
“Did…you want to eat before you go?” Dinner was on the stove, cold but still good. You sat up against your headboard, more of his spend leaking out as you fiddled with your fingers over the soiled sheets. 
Miguel shook his head, sighing as he closed his eyes for a moment.
“I have to go.” He said, stepping forward, grabbing your hand, and placing a chaste kiss over your knuckles. It was the only form of affection he’d allowed himself to give you. He’d never kissed you before. Probably never will. It wasn't part of the deal.
Your heart sunk, your skin searing where his lips had lingered. 
“I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Most nights ended this way—with your aching cunt full of his seed and your eyes wet with unshed tears as you watched him leave through your window, disappearing into the night.
A few days later, Peter B. Parker landed in your office. Quite literally. 
He plopped down on the seat in front of yours from seemingly nowhere, a messily packed diaper bag hanging loosely from his shoulder. He had his daughter snuggly pressed against his chest in her carrier, her chubby arms and legs flailing over his pink robe.
You yelped, dropping the pen in your hand, clutching your chest in freight. 
“Jesus! Where the hell did you just come from?!”
“Up there.” Peter pointed up. You followed his line of vision, noting the door to the air vent busted open, barely hanging from its hinges. “Sorry about the vent.” He offered sheepishly, taking a large bite of a slice of pizza he'd pulled from a greased-up brown paper bag. 
"You could've just taken the elevator!"
"Takes too long to get to the basement.” He said between a mouthful of pizza, “Why'd Miguel give you an office down here anyway?" 
"I'm scared of heights." You reminded him, watching Mayday struggle to release herself from her carrier prison. Peter snorted out a laugh, dropping the diaper bag on the floor while simultaneously taking another bite of his pizza.
“Doesn’t make sense to work in a place like this.”
“It was the deal I made when Miguel asked me to work for him. Chew with your mouth closed.”
“Have you tried the cafeteria pizza?" He asked suddenly, ignoring your demand and speaking with another mouth full of the greasy treat, "It's the new thing. Everyone's going crazy."
You smiled smugly. "I know. You’re welcome."
“Ah, I should've known Miss HR was behind this!” You rolled your eyes at the nickname, rummaging through your drawer before tossing him a few napkins.
“What can I do for you, Peter?” 
Mayday whined, crawling out of the carrier and over her father’s thighs. She hopped on your desk, scattering some of your paperwork. You quickly caught her before she tumbled off the edge, cooing at her before placing her in your lap. You squeezed her in your arms and she let out a scream of delight before squirming, reaching out in wonder at the different knick-knacks on your desk. 
“Right, almost forgot." Peter took the last bite of his pizza, wiping his face and fingers with the napkins you provided before his face morphed into something serious. "Is this guy bothering you?” He pulled out a yellow holo pad, one presumably given to him by Miguel, revealing a video of you and Peter Parker two hundred from the other day. 
You blinked, your eyes tracing the moving image carefully.
”Oh. Not really,” you finally said, ripping your gaze away from the screen, “Nothing I can't handle. Why?” 
“Miguel asked me to investigate the situation discreetly.” 
"Asked?"
"Well, demanded, you know Miguel," Peter shrugged, reaching down into the diaper bag and procuring a lollipop when Mayday began to whine, “he’s concerned. I figured it’d be easier to just ask you about it.” 
You frowned, grasping the sweet when he handed it over to you, pulling off the wrapper and placing it in Mayday's chubby hand, “That’s hardly discreet.”
“I didn’t wanna follow the guy around!” 
“He's making you do that?”
“‘Of course he is. Doesn't like the guy. He barely tolerates me!” 
You snorted. “Why does Miguel even care?”
"You know him better than any of us do. If anyone would know, it’s you." 
Well, that was true.
You knew Miguel before he created the Spider Society, before he was ever Spider-Man. You knew him before his addiction to Rapture, before he experienced fatherhood, before he lost Gabriella. 
Back when, to the world, he was just some guy in a white lab coat. 
But he was never just some guy to you. 
You’ve loved Miguel for years. You’d loved him in your early days at Alchemax, when he was fresh out of college and eager to begin his shaky career, back when you were hanging on to the corporation by a measly thread of an unpaid internship. You were a pair, stuck to each other like glue.
A few years later, when you both decided to take it a step further and mess around, well, that only ignited your feelings further. Miguel was an attentive lover. He knew your needs and fulfilled them, taking you to the heights of pleasure before humbling you just as smoothly with his strict rules about your agreement. 
He didn’t have time to cater to someone's feelings—didn’t have time for a romantic relationship when he had too much on his plate. But his sexual appetite demanded attention—and why not with someone he’s called a friend for years? 
You were just a friend. And that’s all you’d ever be. 
It was just sex. That's all it'd ever be.
“You okay?” Peter ripped you away from your thoughts, his brows furrowed in concern.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” You answered with a sigh, gently resting your chin over Mayday’s soft curls. “Is Miguel worried?” 
“You’re the closest thing he has to a friend, of course he’s worried about you. Those were his words, not mine.” Peter shrugged, putting his holo pad away, “so is there a cause for concern?” The thought alone almost made you smile. Almost. Instead, you scoffed, shaking your head.
“I’m usually the one that handles these situations, you know.”
“And who’s supposed to help you?”
“I don’t need help.” 
“Right.” He didn’t seem convinced. “Miguel doesn't seem to think so. You sure?”
“Very.”
“Alright, I did my part!” He clapped his hands as if he’d successfully completed a mission, “Time to go, Mayday!” He stood, grabbing the babbling baby from you and placing her back in the carrier.
"She's precious." You said, gently pinching Mayday's drool-covered cheek as she teethed over her lollipop.
"Takes after her dad." Peter grinned, snatching up the diaper bag, "Listen, if you ever need any help—"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, get outta here, Parker." You shooed him away, quickly organizing your wrinkled paperwork together. You could still feel his eyes on you as you kept your hands busy, and when you finally looked at him he had a silly smile on his face.
"What?"
“You guys are idiots." He was still grinning.
"What?"
"Nothin'," he said, pressing a kiss to Mayday's red curls, "Just do me a favor. Don't mention any of this to Miguel, alright?" 
You crossed your arms, leaning back against your swivel chair. "Sure."
...
"So you think I need help?"
Miguel's hands immediately stilled on your hips as you stirred the boiling pasta over your electric stove. 
You didn't hear him come in, but you had a feeling he’d show up. It had been a couple of days since he’d fucked you, and there were many stressful days between then and now.
So you’d left your window unlocked just in case.
"What are you talking about?" He muttered, his fingers lightly dancing on your waist before pulling away completely.  
"Nothing." You huffed to yourself, cutting off the heat and getting on your toes to reach for the pasta strainer on the shelf above. After a second of watching you struggle, Miguel put a hand on your shoulder to stop you, reaching forward to grab it for you.
"Doesn’t sound like ‘nothing’.” He finally said, observing you strain the pasta over the sink, the steam from the hot water engulfing you both in what felt like a thick cloud of tension. You peered over your shoulder at him, your eyes raking over his solid form.
“You know, Peter Parker two hundred?” You asked, witnessing his face contort from passive to extreme annoyance.
He sucked his teeth, pinching the bridge of his nose. He leaned back against your counter, looking so out of place in your tiny kitchen, his broad shoulders almost the entire width of your cupboard. “I told Peter to be discreet.”
“He said you’re worried about your only friend.” You continued to tease him, emphasizing the word as you lifted the lid to a pot where a homemade Pomodoro sauce was bubbling. 
“I said that?” Miguel muttered, feigning innocence, watching you take a spoon and scoop some of the red sauce for a quick taste. You could feel his gaze on you, his eyes tracing the way your tongue licked off the remnants of sauce. 
You hummed in approval before scooping up some more and turning to offer Miguel a taste. You lifted the spoon toward him, and after a moment of contemplation, he hunched forward with arms crossed over his toned chest, mouth opening slightly to allow you to press the spoon past his lips. 
His eyes fluttered as he savored the rich taste, humming his own tune of approval. 
"Is it good?" 
“Mhm.”
You beamed, eyeing how he licked his lips like a satisfied cat, his fangs protruding slightly when he ran his tongue over them. The same fangs you’ve felt over your delicate skin from time to time. 
Miguel was a biter. You didn’t mind.
Miguel grunted, using his thumb to wipe off a bit of sauce that lingered near the corner of your lips. You inhaled a shaky breath, your eyes fluttering from the heat of his touch.
"What else did he say?" He murmured, looming over you, his hand now gently cradling the back of your neck, thumb caressing your skin. 
"T-that you're worried about me?" You breathed. Miguel pulled you closer suddenly, the faintest noise of surprise escaping you. His suit always felt strange under your fingers, the digitized fabric almost slippery, like fine silk. It was ridiculous how perfect you felt wrapped up in his arms. You sometimes wished he'd show up in civilian clothes. You missed his lazy outfits when he'd throw on an old t-shirt and a pair of sweats. 
You couldn't remember the last time you'd seen him in anything other than his suit (and his naked form, of course). It meant he was always on the clock, devoting all his precious time to the multiverse. 
It meant that whenever he was alone with you, he considered it work.
And yet, the suit made you feel secure and safe—like nothing in the world could harm you. And there was truth to that, though the only thing harming you these days was Miguel himself. But that was your fault too.
The deal was explicitly no strings attached. You were finding it harder to keep up your end of the bargain. 
You gazed at his full lips. You desperately wanted to taste them, to know how soft and warm they would feel molded against yours. If you were brave enough you might have stolen a taste, might have felt those sharp canines for yourself on your tongue.
Miguel’s thick fingers trailed into your hair, gripping the roots with just a hint of pressure, his lidded eyes taking in every part of your face: your brows, your eyes, the bridge of your nose, and your supple lips—wet and swollen from biting them so damn much.
"Maybe just a little," he finally answered, his shoulders shifting in a slight shrug. You could feel his length press against your hip, hot and throbbing, demanding attention. 
It filled you with pride knowing your proximity was enough to get him excited. It shouldn't though. It was only arousal. Basic primal instincts. 
You shouldn’t be feeling pride for any of this. You had to remind yourself of that.
You closed your eyes, willing your heartbeat to slow down just a bit. Could you really be this love-sick? So hung up on a man who was emotionally unavailable? If you hadn’t fallen before, then you knew you were plummeting now, so far gone that you’d let Miguel do anything to you.
So when he whisked you away to your bedroom, dinner long forgotten, you didn’t put up a fight.
He fucked you from behind. 
It was a tight stretch, your wet cunt fighting him as he tried pressing his swollen tip in with little luck. 
"Gotta let me in," he grunted, spreading your cheeks wide to gaze down at your twitching holes, "you're too tight. Let me in." 
"I'm trying," you panted, tears in your eyes as you buried your face into the sheets, "i-it's been a while." 
"It's okay," his large hands caressed the globes of your ass in comfort, "it's my fault. Haven't been fucking you enough, hm? S'my fault." Miguel rubbed his cock through your soaked folds a few times, the obscene noises of your sopping cunt causing him to grunt. 
"Goddamn, so fuckin' wet." He muttered before lining himself up and carefully pushing in again. You cried out, fisting the sheets when he successfully got the tip in. He groaned, the guttural sound masking your tiny mewls as he pushed on, your wet cunt coating him entirely in your sticky essence, easing his entry just a bit.
"Fuck, Miguel, it h-hurts." You whined, the stretch of him both painful and pleasurable as he bullied his way in, his girthy cock plunging through your fluttering walls. 
"Shh, I know." He rarely cooed as he did now, reassuring you with gentle noises and tender touches as he eased into you, balls deep in your core, “Look how good you’re doing for me. S’good.” A fresh wave of arousal dripped from you at his praise, your fluttering cunt allowing him to push and pull as he pleased.
He began a steady rhythm, holding your hips tightly to work you over his length, muttering to himself all the while as he watched how your creamy juices clung to his cock and covered his skin.
The pain quickly subsided into blinding pleasure. Miguel had you mewling into your mattress, your eyes rolling and drool slipping past your lips, your back impossibly arched, and your swollen cunt wetter than it’s ever been. The slapslapslap of his hips against your ass was loud in the quiet of your bedroom, your moans even louder when he skillfully hit something inside you that made you see stars every single time. 
You loved the feel of him, loved the stretch of his cock, loved how your cunt would ache for days after as if to remember him. 
“Coño,” Miguel growled, keeping a large hand on your lower back to keep you steady in your arched position, “you sound so pretty when I fuck you.” He suddenly gripped your hair, pulling you up as he curved over you, continuing to spill filth into your ears.
It was too much. 
“M-Miguel, I’m g-gonna—”
“Cum for me.” 
That was it. The dam burst within you, your eyes rolling back as you cried out, cunt spasming and gushing all over him.
“That’s it,” he muttered, sloppily thrusting into your tightening core, “good girl.”
“Miguel,” you continued to whine, grinding against him, “Fuuuck, I love you.” 
You didn’t even realize what you said until it was too late, so wrapped up in the bliss of it all that your mouth worked faster than your brain could think.
You froze when you felt him still above you. He released your hair, bringing his hand back to your hips before gripping them viciously, chasing his own release. He rammed into you faster, slamming his hips against your ass one final time before letting out a guttural groan deep from within the confines of his chest. You could only imagine how he looked: tan skin glistening, chocolate hair plastered against his brow and head tossed back in pleasure. 
Miguel said nothing as he gently removed his cock from your aching sex, letting his seed dribble out from you and soak into the sheets.
As soon as you turned around he was already in his suit, pushing a few buttons on his watch before he brought his wine-colored eyes to you. 
"I have to go."
“Mig?” You whispered his name softly, your naked body burning with embarrassment, “I-I’m sorry I—”
"I’ll see you tomorrow.” It was the same thing he always said, but it hurt twice as much. It was as if he were on autopilot, disconnected from what just happened. 
You felt your heart plummet into your stomach as you watched Miguel leave through your window with a speed he usually reserved for missions.
His spend caked your thighs. There was so much of it coming out of you, more so than usual, his cum ruining your sheets enough that you’d need to change them before bed. 
You sniffled, eyes watering, tears threatening to fall. He didn’t even kiss your hand goodbye.
You ripped yourself away from the soiled sheets, stomping over to your window as his cum leaked down your inner thighs before slamming it closed, locking it for good.
...
“You made this?” Miles exclaimed with a mouth full of spaghetti, clumsily twirling another forkful over his paper plate. You were handing out some of the spiders' leftover Pomodoro pasta from the previous night. You’d lost your appetite. It’d be a shame if you let it all go to waste.
“Yeah, eat up, there’s enough for everyone.” You scooped out more pasta from a Tupperware and onto a paper plate for Gwen. The younger girl’s eyes sparkled as she grabbed the plate, immediately slurping up a bite.
“Oh my god,” she muttered, lips covered in red sauce, “why are you working at the Spider Society when you could be a chef?”
“It’s because Miguel begged her to work here,” Miles quipped, a lone spaghetti hanging from his mouth.
“And who told you that?” You narrowed your eyes at him.
“Uhh,” his eyes flew over to Peter B., who was waiting patiently for his own plate of pasta to be served. You turned and narrowed your eyes at Peter, who chuckled nervously. 
“Listen,” he began, hands thrown up in surrender, “the kid got curious, okay? He was convincing, I mean, look at those eyes.” You huffed, snatching Peter’s plate and loading it up with pasta.
“You guys are annoying,” you muttered with no bite, shifting your gaze toward Hobie, who sat quietly with his legs thrown up on the table, “Hobie, fuck the government and all that, but you need to get your dirty boots off the table if you want some food.” 
Hobie sighed dramatically, letting his boots drop to the ground.
“Fine, boss lady.” 
Satisfied, you handed him a plate.
“So, let’s talk about you being a chef?” Gwen tried again, scrapping the remaining bits off her plate. 
“It’s just pasta,” you shrugged, pulling out a chair and taking a seat, “anyone can make a Pomodoro.”
“My dad can’t.”
“…why?”
“He’s Irish.”
“And a bloody cop,” Hobie interjected, twirling his pasta with a plastic fork, “hate those.”
“Here we go,” Gwen huffed, the beginnings of an argument forming. You chose to ignore them, letting Gwen, Miles, and Hobie bicker between themselves.
You squirmed in your seat, crossing your legs to cure the throbbing within. You could still feel Miguel, the stretch of his cock, and the inevitable ache that lingered afterward. You were still full of him, your cunt wet even hours later, plaguing you with the thought of never feeling him again. 
You drummed your fingers over the messy table littered with paper plates and napkins, your body hunched forward, lost in thought.
“So…” Peter began, adjusting the collar of his pink robe, “you gonna tell me what’s going on or am I gonna have to force it outta you?” You whipped your head to look at him, brows furrowed as you regarded him.
“What makes you think something’s going on?” You whispered, hoping the cafeteria was loud enough so the rest of the table wouldn’t hear.
“Something’s going on or you wouldn’t be whispering,” Peter whispered back, his blue eyes pinned to yours as he searched for answers. 
“It’s nothing.” You answered quickly, continuing to squirm in your seat, fighting to ignore your achy cunt. 
“Did you guys finally smooch?” You froze, your hands gripping the edge of the table with a force that made your knuckles go white. 
“Peter, what the fuck are you talking about?” You hissed, watching him happily eat his Pomodoro.
“You think I don’t know?” He challenged, “It might not be obvious to everyone else but I know what’s going on.” He winked at you, dabbing a napkin messily over his mouth.
Your heart was pounding, ready to beat out your chest, but you schooled your features as best you could. You swallowed thickly, crossing your arms over your chest as if to make yourself smaller. 
“Okay, fine, you know. What of it?” 
“Miguel’s being mopey.”
“Mopey?” You snorted, shaking your head, “He’s always mopey, isn’t he?”
“This is a different kind of mopey,” Peter raised a brow, “it’s actually kind of… frightening.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s got nothing to do with us, for once. Usually one of us pisses him off enough to throw things but he’s on a mission. Said he needed to clear his head. So what happened?” You sighed, shoulders sagging.
“I might have said something I wasn’t supposed to last night.”
“What?”
“We made a deal,” you explained in a whisper, “no feelings, just…you know,” you wiggled your fingers, hoping it would be enough of an explanation. Peter nodded, urging you to continue, “Well, I messed up.”
“How?”
“ItoldhimIlovehim.” You blurted out, your hands flying over your mouth. Peter blinked with a subtle tilt of his head, before a grin stretched over his lips. You groaned, now covering your eyes, “W-what is that, why are you smiling? Stop it.”
“I mean, one of you had to say it first.”
“Peter, you’re killing me here.” He rolled his eyes, inching close enough till your knees brushed against his.
“You don’t think the big guy feels the same way?”
“No!” You squeaked incredulously, “There’s no way. You should’ve seen him yesterday. He could barely look at me!” 
“You caught him off guard.”
“I know that, but he still could’ve said something. Anything.”
“He’s a guy. Guys are stupid.” You groaned, pushing your hair out of your face. You turned to look at the other spiders. You knew they’d been listening given the way they all turned away immediately.
“Someone is stupid,” you muttered to Peter, feeling dejected, “and it’s definitely not him.”
...
You took a deep breath before placing your watch over the sensor.
The door to Miguel’s office didn’t budge, not to your surprise. Lyla must have blocked the systems again.
What were you even doing there? 
You hadn’t seen Miguel in about a week. That was ample time to inform you he wanted nothing to do with you. You couldn't blame him but still, it was…unprofessional. He was your boss at the end of the day. 
Maybe you shouldn’t have started fucking the head of the Spider Society. Your weak heart wouldn’t be in shambles if you didn’t.
It was a stupid move, you knew, telling someone you love them in the throes of passion when they clearly weren’t on the same page, unprovoked or not. He probably hates you. He must. 
You’d given yourself enough time to think it through and given yourself so many pep talks before deciding a professional relationship with Miguel was for the best. No more friends with benefits. 
No more keeping your window unlocked.
You took a breath and tried again. No luck. 
Did he fire you? That couldn’t be right. You were still in the system and able to enter HQ with your keycard just fine. 
“You’re always catching him at a bad time,” Lyla sighed beside you, whipping out her tiny little holographic phone, “he didn’t even want to take a photo! Unbelievable!” The small image on her screen revealed a snarling Miguel, clearly unamused by the bunny filter plastered over his face. It was cute, even if he looked a bit terrifying baring his fangs. 
Lyla shifted to face you, hands on her little hips as she looked you up and down.
“You look niiice,” she quickly snapped a photo of you, “no cute filter needed.”
“Uhh, thanks?”
“Now it’s your turn to say something nice to me.” The Ai grinned when you rolled your eyes. 
“You look…extra yellow today, Lyla.” 
“Thank you! I’m in default mode.”
“Okay, so I’ll just come back later then?” You rushed to leave but Lyla stopped you, zapping in front of you suddenly.
“Nah, I’ll let you in.” You could hear the door to Miguel’s office opening, “Fix him.” 
“What? How am I supposed to do that?” 
Lyla shrugged, “I dunno, I just know you’re the only one that can.” She waved farewell, disappearing in a glimmer of gold. 
You groaned, dropping your head in your hands for a moment to collect your thoughts. Your palms began to sweat—they always did when you were nervous—so you quickly wiped them over your black pencil skirt before facing the office entryway. 
It was dark as usual, the only light illuminating the area was Miguel’s bright yellow screens. They hung above him as he sat slouched in his chair, legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles. His head turned lazily to regard you. 
“I heard you’ve been mopey.” You began, cracking a smile when he snorted. He shook his head, watching you slowly approach him like one would a wounded animal.  He didn’t confirm nor deny the accusation.
“What do you need?” 
“To talk to you.” You said, finding the courage to step into his space, leaning back against his desk and blocking one of the yellow screens.
“About?” 
“Us.” Miguel hummed, running a hand through his messy hair. He sat up in his chair but said nothing else, allowing you the space to speak freely.
“I-I wanted to apologize if I made you feel uncomfortable,” you began to fumble with your fingers, unable to keep eye contact with him for very long, “I know that what I said was…crossing the line—”
“Did you mean it?” He asked abruptly, the question forcing your eyes away from your fingernails and toward his chiseled face. He looked exhausted, eyes heavy but swimming with curiosity.
“W-well, I mean, it was a moment of—”
“Did you mean it?” He repeated, his tone stern as he awaited a proper answer from you. You bit your lip, slowly nodding your head.
“Yeah. I did. Still do.” 
The silence that stretched wasn’t very long but it felt like an eternity. Miguel only stared at you, his jaw tight as he sat forward, his elbows resting on his toned thighs.
You wished you could read his thoughts, take a peek at what ran through his mind. He was always so good at hiding his emotions, never showing an ounce of what he felt. That wasn’t always the case but after Gabriella, he didn’t show much of anything. 
“I think it’s best we don’t see each other anymore,” you finally concluded, crossing your arms, “we should stop.”
“What?” Miguel’s eyes narrowed, “What do you mean stop?” He was towering over you in a matter of seconds, forcing you to crane your neck to look up at him. Your heart was pounding, your hands flying to grip the edge of his desk.
“Mig, we can’t keep doing this.”
“Yes, we can.” He caged you in his arms, bringing his face just a few inches away from yours. He never had much of a problem with eye contact, but you did. You chose to look at his collarbones and the large swoop of his shoulders. It was intimidating and arousing all at once and you weren’t getting anywhere with this speech, were you?
“We can’t. Not when we’re not on the same page.” 
“Who says we’re not?” You felt his fingers graze the side of your face, pushing a lock of your hair behind your ear. You turned away, squeezing your eyes shut, feeling the familiar prick of tears behind your lids.
“Stop playing with me.” You said, pushing him away with little luck. Miguel shifted slightly at your touch, watching you rub at your eyes. 
“I’m not.” 
“Then why have you not said anything for a week?” You hissed, the frustration threatening to boil over, “You’ve left me agonizing over this for a week, Miguel!” You wiped furiously at your cheeks, catching a few stray tears. “I’m such an idiot.” 
Miguel grabbed your wrists in his hands, yanking them away from your face. His concerned eyes met your wet ones, a frown tugging at his lips.
“Stop.” He demanded, taking your flushed face in his hands and wiping the wet streaks away with his thumbs. “Don’t say that about yourself.” You glared, cheeks puffed and swollen from the pressure of fighting away tears.
“Fine,” you snapped, ignoring the way he stroked your cheeks, “you’re the fucking idiot.” 
“I am,” Miguel agreed with a sigh, refusing to release you, “I didn’t know what to say. Thought you might have been lying—don’t look at me like that.” 
“You’re pissing me off.”
“I know, beba.” The endearment startled you for a moment, your glossy eyes peering up at him as a rush of excitement settled in your stomach. He’d never used endearing words with you before. It had you stumped for a second before you remembered yourself, your brows furrowing in irritation
“Why would you think I was lying? Mig, I’ve loved you for years, you buffoon!” Miguel loomed closer with every word before he kissed you, silencing you effectively. Your eyes fluttered, your lips unresponsive at first until he coaxed you into a gentle rhythm. 
Kissing Miguel was so much softer than you imagined. 
You thought he’d be all tongue and teeth, desperate to devour his victim. His kisses were syrupy and deliberate, steady and reassuring. He was taking his time learning the shape of your lips, the plumpness, how perfect they felt molded against his. 
“I’m sorry, beba,” he said between kisses, letting you snake your arms around his neck to pull him closer, “perdoname. I’m an idiot.” You hummed in agreement, continuing to assault his lips sweetly. You couldn’t stop kissing him if you wanted to, sneaking your tongue past the seam of his lips to taste more of him. 
He growled, tightening his hold on you, allowing you to taste at your leisure. He tasted fresh, like the spearmint gum he always had on hand.
“Perdoname,” he repeated, wanting so desperately for you to forgive his transgressions, slotting himself between your legs.
“Yeah? You’re sorry?” you teased, feeling the familiar ache of arousal blooming in your core, “show me how sorry you are.” Another growl ripped from him, animalistic and provoked. He wasted no time, pushing you down so that your back was flat against his desk and your legs were wrapped around his hips. 
He pressed a button beside you and suddenly, the platform began to elevate. 
“Mig,” you sat up in a panic, but Miguel only pushed you back down, lifting your skirt up till it pooled over your waist, “w-why are we moving up?”
“Privacy,” he grunted, spreading your legs, running his thumb over the soaked patch of your panties. Your hands scrambled to find purchase on something over the desk, your heart hammering in your chest as the ceiling seemed to loom closer.
“Y-you know I’m scared of heights!” You squealed when the platform came to a jutting halt, squeezing your eyes shut. You didn’t even want to think about how high up you were.
“It’s okay,” Miguel purred, gently rubbing your clit through the fabric, “you’re safe, you’re with me, beba, no tengas miedo.” 
“M-Mig, please,” you didn’t even know what you were begging for at that point, you just needed something, and whatever that was, he gave to you. You felt him push aside your panties, and you finally spared him a glance, almost choking at the sight of him mesmerized by the sweetness between your legs.
“You’re so fucking wet,” he muttered, slipping a finger through your folds, “you dripping all over my desk.”
“Y-yeah?” 
“Mhm,” he hummed, easily ripping your panties apart before getting on his knees, “smell s’good.” He muttered, licking a stripe up with his fat tongue, scooping whatever mess you made. He moaned at the taste before completely diving in, eyes closed and large hands keeping your trembling thighs spread for him.
As always, you were a whimpering mess for him, mewling with every precise stroke of his tongue. It was the first time he’d done something like this, and god, it was nothing you could have ever dreamed of.  
He moaned into your cunt, the gentle vibrations sending shockwaves through your body. You trembled and whined with every loud slurp of his mouth over your clit, his tongue swiping over your precious bud before working his way down to dip inside your hole. 
“Fuck, Miguel,” your hands flew to his hair, your fingers weaving through the thick strands to keep his head in place. He skillfully nipped and licked the surface, lifting his face away slightly to spit into your cunt, watching it run through your puffy folds with lidded eyes before devouring you again.
“You taste fucking amazing,” he groaned, sucking your clit between his lips.
You threw your head back, letting out the prettiest moans for him. You forgot about everything, about where you were and how high up you were from the ground. You couldn’t care less as long as Miguel continued to eat from you like a madman. 
You could feel the tension in your abdomen, the clear sign that you were close. Miguel continued to drink from you, slurping obscenely at the fresh arousal that dripped into his mouth.
“Close?” He asked, giving you kitten licks, his hands squeezing your thighs encouragingly. 
“God y-yes, so close.” You could feel him smiling against your folds before starting up a vicious rhythm again with his eyes closed. 
With a loud cry, you came into his waiting mouth, your back arching and body withering over the table from the overstimulation. Miguel licked and sucked every inch of you, determined to catch every drop of your orgasm. 
“Oh my god,” you moaned, releasing your grip from his hair and draping an arm over your eyes. Miguel stood, removing your arm and leaning over your fatigued body. He looked down at you with intense red eyes, his mouth and chin completely covered in your slick. You bit your lip when a smile curved at the edges of his lips before he swooped down to kiss you.
You moaned, completely aroused all over again from your own musky taste on his lips. He slipped his tongue in your mouth, allowing you a proper taste. 
“Perdoname.” He begged again over your lips before gently brushing the tip of his nose against yours. You giggled, pushing him away slightly so that you could sit up on your elbows. 
“Mm, I don’t know,” you teased, “you’re gonna have to try again.” Miguel shook his head, tapping a button on his watch, and allowing his suit to vanish. You gasped at his sudden nakedness, your eyes glued to his throbbing erection. Miguel grinned, fangs bared, tapping his cock over your sensitive cunt.
You closed your eyes as he immediately pushed in, moaning as he worked himself into your tight channel. 
In your euphoric state, you barely registered him grabbing your hand and placing a chaste kiss over your knuckles, whispering over your skin. Your ears picked up a few words, some naughty and some sweet, but your heart fluttered and your chest tightened when you caught the last two words before he began pounding into you.
“Te amo.”
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loveafterdeath-if · 6 months ago
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Update (more like me rambling than an actual update, tbh)
Hope y'all are doing alright! I saw my inbox filled with asks and kind words (y'all are the best, as always), and I'll start answering everything once I wrap up Chap 2, Part 2. I want to focus fully on writing so I can get you the whole chapter before March at least, haha.
I'm gonna start correcting what I've written so far to avoid ending up with 100k words to fix all at once. We're about 50% through Chap 2, Part 2 (38k words, but it'll probably hit 40k with corrections). There are branches that have messed with my brain because I wanted to include scenes for each RO, but I don't regret it. I love games with lots of replayability (is that how we say it?), so I want mine to offer that too.
Chap 2, Part 2 will have a ton of branches for each RO, plus the option if you're not pursuing anyone, so it might take a while to get that full chapter out. I honestly don't know how other authors keep track of so many branches! I've always respected them as a reader/player, but being the one writing makes me wanna hand my future kids over to those incredible authors…
On top of that, I'm dealing with another issue. I've been writing so much that I think I'm slowly slipping into that "They gaze at her and say," "They take the paper and it falls" vibe (is that even a thing? Idk). You know, the kind of writing with no real description. I find myself double-checking everything to make sure the descriptions are 'good,' and I think I'll just play some IFs when I got time, to help me regain my groove without turning phrases all weird (I hate reading books, that's why I'm gonna play IFs). This is making me slow down a bit.
I've been pushing myself to write at least 4-5k words each day for the past 3 (4?) months, and I think I shouldn’t have done that. I'm putting pressure on myself without even realizing it. It's only when I end up with 'only' 3k words that I start feeling upset and push through to hit minimum 4k. I'm feeling good for now and don't mind writing that much, but I really don't want to wake up one day and boom—burnout. A Ko-fi member and some folks in my inbox have kindly reminded me to take breaks and take my time, so I think I'll slow down a bit. Like, maybe aim for 3k words?
I've been writing for years, (started on Wattpad in French, and yeah, it was… something) so no worries about the game going on hiatus or anything. I love writing, especially interactive stuff—so basically IFs, haha. Just wanted to keep you in the loop!
Anyway, this ended up way longer than I intended. Stay safe, don't forget to eat your greens, stay hydrated, and all that! <3
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mikeypubes · 9 months ago
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ੈ✩‧₊˚ aizen sosuke relationship headcanons ੈ✩‧₊˚
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♡ [ Request by @brieftravelerbeard ] ♡
[ Note: Thanks so much for the request! You had me jumping up and down with joy when I saw it 😭 I hope it's to your liking 🫶 ]
°˖✧✿✧˖°
SFW
For starters, he is unfortunately perfect.
He's gentle with you, kind (to a degree), understanding, responsible, and he tries his best to make sure you're fully content and comfortable.
Say you're with him in Las Noches, you're gonna have access to the absolute finest food and clothes they have.
He's incredibly patient with you, and any negative behavior from your end will almost never irritate him.
He also shows a lot of affection in various ways, such as getting you all the shit you need and more.
His love language is gift giving. He's always giving you stuff.
He's also good with physical affection, and although he won't initiate a lot of it, he'll accept it most of the time.
He presses gentle yet teasing kisses to your lips, caresses your cheek, pulls you in close to his chest and looks at you intensely.
Although 9 times outta 10, he'd be a yandere (it's just in his personality), I feel like if you guys are super close and he truly trusts you, he might be easier on you than say a hostage he had (like Orihime) or some girl he wants for his benefits.
If you're a hostage he fell for, he'd try whatever ways possible to make sure you're completely his, but he'd be manipulative about it.
I don't think he'd be open about his intentions with someone he's interested romantically in because who the fuck would fall in love with someone who's all "yeah im manipulating you you dumb bitch" (spoiler alert: me ✌️).
He'd make sure whichever family members or friends you have will slowly leave you alone and broken, so that the only person you can return to is him.
He'd also make sure to have this level of "dominance" over you
Like he wants you to understand that you guys aren't on the same level, therefore, you have to abide by his orders and his will or else he'll take measures that aren't in your favor (and no I don't mean he'll "punish 😈🖤" you)
He tells you not to be afraid of him (because that totally does wonders) a lot.
Let's not lie to ourselves, he knows he's hot as shit and you better bet he uses that a LOT.
He's not above using seduction to get to you (and ofc it works 🙄).
He really values intimacy and privacy.
He'll be so incredibly romantic with you in private, like he'll have everything set up and take his time to have deep conversations with you, tell you about his goals, he'll try to understand you better.
He'd drink wine with you and have you wear something he got for you (use your imagination here 😁)
He would low-key call you "dear" or "honey" if you guys have been in a relationship for a while (but he won't call you baby or doll eugh).
He doesn't get jealous, like, at all. He gets cautious yeah, like if Gin was pulling some bullshit like he always is, but not jealous or insecure.
He would make you jealous on purpose I'm sorry.
He'd find it SO amusing to toy with you and make you feel a wide range of emotions.
Like one day, he'd flirt with his ugly minion girls and piss you off, then he'll shower you with attention and love, then he'll say something cruel and make you cry.
He loves seeing your expressions and how vulnerable you are.
It serves him a ton of satisfaction seeing that you're so dependent on him.
NSFW
I feel like it wouldn't take long for you guys to finally do it, since half of the relationship is coated with sexual tension anyway.
Again, very gentle.
Unbearably slow. You can cry and beg but he'll keep going at the exact same pace.
Enjoys pushing you to your limits and overstimulating you.
I don't think it'd be any bigger than 8 inches. I've seen some people go on about 9 or 10, like guys he's not a fucking meter stick (not to mention, nobody's cooch is big enough to take allat in).
Hates quickies because he loves to drag it on.
Ton of foreplay (probably for an hour minimum) and fingering.
His aftercare is amazing, though.
You'll always wake up to find yourself totally clean, in new clothes, and if he's still by your side in the morning (very rare occurrence), you'll be laying your head on his chest.
He loves holding your waist close to him.
(He probably likes your breasts the most)
°˖✧✿✧˖°
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eggiesins · 4 months ago
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THE FUCKING DOUGHNUTS FJDUFJDDUJS. This blog is the gift that keeps on giving. Since I'm a bit of a softy at heart, could you do some foreplay or aftercare headcanons with the bachelors too?
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Got two related asks for this one, so I decided to mash them together in one monstrous post. Thank you guys for submitting your requests! I only have one to go after this before I get them all.
A few disclaimers before we get into the post:
While I understand what aftercare is, I'm not super well-versed in it (or a lot of BDSM topics). My husband and I usually fist bump about it & get ourselves a snack. If I got some things wonky or weird, forgive me
I do understand the current climate surrounding booktok and the whole "good girl" thing, but for me personally, it makes my skin crawl so I didn't delve too far into that kind of dynamic, apologies. If you enjoy it, more power to you because the feminism is in the freedom to express that openly
Mostly GN Builder, but there are some bits that are a bit more genitalia and gender specific
I accidentally went way too hard in the paint regarding the ways that Justice & Logan have likely experienced intimacy
NSFW Part 2: Electric Boogaloo
Arvio
Experience Level
Definitely not as much as he probably says it is. Y'know the line from American Pie where the boys talk about how vaginas feel like warm apple pie? It's giving Arvio
If he has gone all the way with someone back in Barnarock, I don't think it was more than once
He has that aura of like, a hopeless romantic who thinks you have to be a player to woo a partner so they hide their lack of experience behind a cheesy facade. He just tends to massively overcomplicate things and has a questionable love for grand gestures
No hate if that's what you like, I know a ton of folks on here are Arvio fans. To me, grand gestures just seem like they're more about the gesture itself than the person it's for, and that kind of thinking is very typical for Arvio. He doesn't tend to think through the consequences his plans have for the people involved, a la the Desert Rose incident
Foreplay
He's very easy to get riled up
partner runs their fingers through his hair & lightly drags their nails along their scalp & he's ready to
his partner's dressed up in Pablo's new swimsuit collection? He's ready to go
For his partner
bird of paradise dance probably
He's gonna try every move in the book on his partner first, and it's definitely him overcompensating because he's secretly worried they'll be disappointed in how quickly he finishes
After a while he'll get more comfortable, though, & he'll really take his time to figure out what his partner likes
He'll really give it his all tbh, even if the skills take a while to build. It's the effort that counts
Aftercare
He's gonna ramble on and on about how amazing it was for sure
From there? All his Treasure has to do is ask, and he'll make it happen. A glass of water? Some cleanup? Snuggles and sleep? He's on it
Being his partner's first
the PRESSURE on this poor man lmfao
he's gonna go all out to try and make it perfect, rose petal trail to the bed, rose petals on the bed, an old record playing in the background, candles, the whole 9 yards
bro's gonna be studying up on some romance novels
of course, what really matters is the genuine emotional connection, so just be patient & remind him that this is about the two of you coming together, not two characters in some book
Burgess
p sure the builder is Burgess' first anything, virgin for sure
While he wouldn't be turned off by a very experienced partner being his first, I do think he would probably build up a lot of unrealistic expectations for himself, so just be sure to remind him that it's completely okay & the important part is to make love, not just bone crazy style
he'll definitely try to do some research about it (and nearly die from embarrassment in the process) and most likely end up psyching himself out
He doesn't need aftercare so much as he needs beforecare tbh
Foreplay
sermons about the builder
Burgess is definitely inexperienced, so it'll take a minute to figure out what works best for him in terms of foreplay, but I imagine he'd be pretty easy: whispering spicy nothings in his ear, a light tug on his belt, anything involving touching his neck, especially if it's the bare skin (like a sneaky lil finger under his collar?? Mans is IN)
And for his partner? Burgess strikes me as a Grade A Carpet Muncher tbh, or an absolute throat goat for penis-having builders
It's hydrating, probably nutritious (fuck if I know), his partner loves it
Body Worship is the term I'm looking for lmfao
He's definitely a giver, the kind to whimper and grind himself into the bed while he gives his partner head
And if the builder is calling his name as they writhe under him? He's busting quick
He's really a romantic, so as long as his partner can really feel that physical expression of his love for them, and they can give it in return, he'll be a happy lil guy
Aftercare
I don't really see Burgess as being comfortable with anything too hardcore kinky, definitely not pain or bruising
maybe some fuzzy handcuffs or silk ropes
I think he would enjoy a more dominant partner who can take the lead in kinkier situations, y'know? He'd prefer being blindfolded & tied to the bed more than doing it to his partner
Either way, after any sexual encounter, he'll be pretty up front about asking the builder if they really had a good time, and even more up front letting them know that he had a good time
being his partner's first
how romantic!
Burgess puts a lot of pressure on himself & can become very insecure when it comes to situations he's not familiar with, so having a partner with little to no experience would be a big relief for him. Y'all can figure it out together!
Ernest
Experience Level
He talks a big game, but every move he has came from a damn book, no real experience
Foreplay
Thinking about Logan
Reading smut together! Or coming up with smut together
Maybe he had an idea for an adult book & needs to make sure that the scenes he's describing actually work
Aftercare
Impromptu sonnet about his partner opening up like a flower or something probably
Sleepy snuggles after the sonnet
Being his partner's first
Externally he's like "oh don't worry, we'll figure this out step by step" while internally he's screaming a bit because he's new to this too and oh man what if he's not good enough or it's only mid and now he's ruined your first time
Fang
Experience Level
I mean, we all know Fang is brand new to this. He knows what it's supposed to be and quite frankly, the weight of those expectations is far scarier than if he was just venturing into the unkown
Foreplay
DO NOT BITE OR SCRATCH THIS MAN. He's had enough pain in his life, he does not need it sprinkled into his pleasure as well
Given the dynamic of his relationship with the builder throughout the game, I denounce the cries for "dommy daddy fang" and posit instead, "power bottom fang"
I agree he's incredibly pent-up, but the builder would have to initiate things because he's just not as comfortable initiating relational steps. The builder does a lot of that in-game, pushing him (within reason) out of his comfort zone & from there he can really take off & go crazy go dummy
The builder hugged him once when he tried pulling away, and once he finally did give in he was basically like "we are married now". Swans mate for life man, c'mon
Aftercare
Drinking water together afterward, both of y'all just sitting in breathless silence
He's got herbs to help in case of exhaustion 😎 so he will probably insist on both parties getting some sleep afterward
"The feel of your touch…unforgettable." I can't let this line go guys, it's an 11/10 on the Fang boldness scale. Rewired my brain chemistry, honestly. He's definitely gonna let ya know he had a good time & the way he says it is gonna leave you stunned for a second
Being his partner's first
Honestly, he'd be relieved. They can both move slowly, without a whole lot of pressure to be great from the start
You gotta be willing to play the long game & push things forward to romance Fang, and that would count for intimacy too
He'll go at whatever pace his partner sets
Justice
Experience Level
Pretty well experienced, but it's been a while
Doesn't have as much of an existential crisis as Logan regarding past nights of fun. If he's out with Logan, he understands he actually has to charm someone with his personality & playfulness. Justice is handsome, don't get me wrong. But for any of y'all out there who are like, above average in attractiveness, but are still considered by others far below that of your friends (at least in terms of what's conventional), you get what I'm saying. (Maybe later we can get into a whole thing about whiteness being the standard for beauty in My Time games & how that's informed by contemporary attitudes)
So he at least knows that, somewhat, this person is sleeping with him because they actually like him, not just because he's a trophy to be won
Justice is comfortable in himself and what he can do for a partner, so he doesn't tend to sweat the small things too much
Foreplay
flirflirtflirtflirtflirtflirtflirt. Mans has one-liners for every occasion, this included
He'll get them all riled up with little double entendres slipped into his usual jokes, stuff he knows only they'll pick up on
Seeing his partner get all flustered and blushy at what seems to be just a passing comment? And then watching them get more and more worked up 'til they finally get home & can let it all out? chefs kiss
He's a classic, & he enjoys the classics. Slap his ass
Y'all saw that flirty shooting lesson, right? Justice really enjoys that kind of plausible deniability, where only he and his builder are in on the joke & the joke is that they're boning
Aftercare
he's grabbing the warm damp rag, getting y'all cleaned up, and snuggling up in bed
Will give them a sly wink the morning after when he sees them riding a little funny into town
Speaking of riding, save a yakmel, ride a sheriff
Being his partner's first
Genuinely thought he was too old for this, but that's okay 'cause he's got the experience & the patience to make sure they have a good time
Logan
Experience Level
similar to justice, pretty well-versed but obviously it's been a minute
different from justice in that Logan doesn't really look back fondly on past partners
Logan is a hardcore romantic with an ooey-gooey heart; he doesn't get much out of one-night stands other than a brief physical catharsis.
For him, sex would only be enjoyable & memorable with someone he actually cares about. Otherwise, it's just kind of like putting on a shitty plastic bandaid that's gonna fall off in about 5 minutes
It's also worth noting that Logan is well-aware that he is considered very attractive to others, which makes it easy to find a ONS, but he also knows that the other person couldn't give less of a shit about him. He's just the eye candy they get to brag about later.
Kinda reminds me of an early reddit post I saw where a "fan" was asking if there's a way to romance Logan without adopting Andy too. Like, just say you want to ride the wanted poster, rather than the character & baggage behind all that
Foreplay
weak for mumus, weak for domesticity in general after basically spending his life hunting with his dad
Fighting to a degree, like when you get into an argument with your partner just to have angry sex
Or like, physically play-fighting. There's something about fighting to pin your partner down while they're actively trying to pin you down too that's just, oof man
Compliments both ways! He get's all bashful when his partner compliments him, and of course he loves to sing his builder's praises too. They saved his home, damnit, light of his life.
Aftercare
"Darlin', was that as amazing for you as it was for me? Didn't hurt, right?"
Glass of water & sleepy snuggles afterward
If it was morning sex, he's burning breakfast with the confidence of a god
Cigarettes after sex, but make it blue collar
Being his partner's first
He feels like a whore at first, lmao, running back through war flashbacks of so many half-forgotten partners and drunken nights spent looking for a momentary comfort after weeks in the wilderness
"Me???? Ya sure?"
He'll be very gentle, almost too gentle, like he's terrified of hurting his partner or doing the wrong thing. He'll check in often to make sure they're having fun & feeling good
Miguel
Experience Level
Inexperienced in all matters of love, somewhat experienced in reading smut romance novels.
He grew up in Doss, which was destroyed. Then he studied in Meidi where everyone else liked Matilda better than him. He's a social outcast, and has had few opportunities to really connect with another person romantically, so he's mostly written it off for himself.
Foreplay
Well, how do you tend a garden? Or a flock? Care, tenderness, and patience. How do you get a massively repressed pastor horny? Literally, just touch him anywhere & he's already at half mast.
Thinks he wants to be in control, but enjoys things much more when he is not. He's very easy to get flustered when its his Builder complimenting his appearance or telling him how much they want him. He may not pick up on subtle hints as easily, but a few spicy words whispered in his ear will be more than enough to get him going.
Aftercare
"I…that was…for once, I feel that words cannot do it justice…"
Looooooooong talks afterwards about how meaningful it was, how emotionally connected & in-tune he felt with his partner. It's a kind of intimacy he's never experienced before, and to him, it's divine. Making love and being in love become gifts from the Light.
Being his partner's first
Miguel.exe has stopped working, immediate blue screen
Like, of course, he has this reverence toward his Builder where his religiosity really comes into play, holding them to a high standard & kinda putting them on a moral pedestal. That being said, I think early on he does expect them to be more worldly than they seem, & especially with how desirable he knows they are, he would find it surprising they haven't had a partner before. It'll make him feel that much more special, that much more unworthy, to hold his Builder, and he's determined to do everything he can to make sure they know how much they mean to him
Owen
Experience Level
If he's not a virgin, he's had maybe like one partner before
This mans is nervous. Thanks to growing up in the saloon though, he's at least heard or seen a few things & has a real knack for reading people, making him a quick study in bed. That said, I think growing up in the saloon & sometimes overhearing or even accidentally seeing patrons get down and dirty upstairs could paint a slightly unrealistic picture in his mind. He's a romantic for sure, so the sloppy, messy one night stands he's heard or seen would turn him off from casual sex. He wants connection and love, not just jackhammering both parties to a screeching finale.
Foreplay
Initially, he might try to treat it as a performance, especially if his partner is pretty well-versed in casual liasons. Be sure to remind him that you want him for who he really is, and not what he thinks intimacy should look like.
Communication, communication, communication. He'll ask his partner for some guidance as to what they like, stopping to check in every now and then just to make sure he's doing it right
If the Builder's helping out around the saloon, he's definitely gonna get caught staring as they bend over to buss a table. Grace will tease him about this and jokingly threaten to swoop in on his partner if all he wants to do is just stand there and look.
Aftercare
Oh he's cooking afterward for sure. Not anything too fancy, but something simple and comforting
The sex may be done, but his hands are still all over his partner, massaging trembling legs, caressing their cheek, all the tenderness and love he can convey without actually being inside them.
Being his partner's first
It's a big relief for him, I would think. Not that he would judge a partner who has experience, but he would feel less pressured to perform in a way that may not come naturally to him. He can just focus on taking his time and exploring what works for both parties.
That being said, he's still gonna pressure himself about making it perfectly romantic, kind of like Arvio or Ernest. He went all out for his proposal, so imagining the wedding night??? Honeymoon suite, flowers, champagne, his best records playing in the background. And for all that, as soon as he sees the white lingerie, he's cooked. Everything he had planned flies right out the window
Pablo
Experience Level
Knowing Pablo, no one but him will ever truly know
However, he does come across as very experienced, so I think he could sit at either end of the spectrum
Either he's flirted his way across the Free Cities but never let himself be vulnerable enough to actually have sex, or he really has slept his way through town, keeping a line of various paramours waiting for his return
Foreplay
Flirting yes, but specifically mean flirting, like teasing and challenging. Pablo enjoys a good back-and-forth with someone he respects and cares about. It's less about the physicality of foreplay than it is the communication and anticipation. He appreciates a partner who can get him hot and bothered only to say "Hm, maybe later. Stars aren't aligned for it right now." Pablo is coy, so he'd like a partner who knows how to play hard-to-get
He'll playfully lament their teasing & wax poetic about being a man deprived of affection while thrilling at how well they understand him & can keep up with him.
He's taking charge, telling the builder to lie back and relax while he does what an artist does best. His tongue is the brush, the Builder his canvas
Aftercare
It's more limited at first, as he adjusts to the post-nut clarity and realizes he really did let himself be vulnerable with another person. He might shut down a bit as he processes things, cringing at himself for all his perceived mistakes. He'll need his partner's reassurance that it was a good time & was just as meaningful for them as it was for him
Cigarettes after sex, but make it a painting
Once he grows more comfortable with his partner though, he becomes an expert at aftercare
Being his partner's first
"My Spark, you shall have only the finest of my talents, then. Just relax, and oh, do speak up dear." Lowkey Astarion-coded
Pen (based on his English dialogue lines as Pen in the original Chinese is a whole different person)
Y'all have no idea how badly I wanted to make his entire entry just the gif of Patrick Bateman watching himself & flexing in the mirror
Experience Level
Well, we know this one, if his comment about the 12 other lovers is to be believed (which I am inclined to because ain't no way that's the first emergency fuck-sofa he's ever built)
That being said, he definitely leans more toward the "fuck" end of the spectrum rather than the "make love" side of things
making love requires vulnerability & emotionality that Pen just hasn't invested in anyone before the Builder (& even then he still had a lot to hide)
Has a big dick and he knows it (he measured)
Foreplay
Fighting. Other than that, just assume he's really ready to go whenever and wherever
He doesn't really see a need to invest in much foreplay unless his partner tells him they want it
He might be hestitant at first, not really understanding the nuances that go into foreplay (How could his fingers - mighty as they are - do something his dick could not?) but once he does see the effect it has on his partner, he's locking that away for future use back in Duvos
He'll be surprised at how much he comes to enjoy just taking his time to tease his partner, especially once he finds out he can make them beg for it. And once he discovers how far edging can go? Good luck, Builder
Aftercare
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
jk guys don't kill me I know y'all love this guy
But his aftercare is gonna come down to "babe that was great wasn't it? Like a battle for the ages, Skinny! My blood is pumping, gonna go fight some monsters real quick."
You'd need to be pretty comfortable taking care of yourself & advocating for yourself if you're gonna be with Pen. It's not that he doesn't care if his partner had a good time, but more that he just assumes it's about the size of the tool rather than how you use it.
Being his partner's first
Like I said, if you're gonna be with Pen, you'd better be comfortable speaking up about what you want. He's got a big personality & a tendency to push others the way he wants them to go.
He's gonna be prideful about it, because of course you'd want him to be your first. Just, y'know, understand that this means your expectations for other future partners will be far, far too high. Pen, why are you talking about future partners? The arrogant demeanor is really just a cover-up for the tiny Pen inside who is absolutely floored and anxious at the prospect. He's gonna feel like he needs to perform and perform exceptionally.
Once he's into it though, instinct just takes over & he stops thinking so much & just focuses on giving his partner what they obviously want: him!
Qi
Experience Level
Qi is a virgin, having never had any romantic partners before the builder. Everything he knows about sex definitely comes from textbooks, so he's likely to approach it from a very methodical point of view. You'll have to help him to learn the more emotional side of things, how making love is about connection and intimacy, rather than just going through the prescribed motions.
Foreplay
The scientific method! He's going in with research (asking partner what they like), a hypothesis (If I do X, then they will react like Y), and unbiased experimentation (hypothesis confirmed or rejected?)
He can, and will (that's a threat) repeat the experiments as many times as necessary to achieve the desired result (little death of his partner)
And it's the same thing for him, too. He has no idea what he would like, so a partner who wants to help explore his desires and needs with the same efficiency & exhaustive methods would be ideal. I could see Qi being one of the few bachelors you would want a safeword with right from the get-go just because he's so curious
Aftercare
Sand tea, you'll need the caffeine
He's definitely gonna go on a long lecture about all the chemical changes happening in your bodies after the climax: bonding hormones, endorphins, post-nut clarity, the whole nine yards
Being his partner's first
That's great! Now he has someone to study with
He would also be surprised, kind of like Miguel, because it's not like he doesn't understand how desirable the builder is. He'd mostly wonder why you would choose him of all people when there are plenty more experienced candidates to help you navigate your first time. It's not like he'd go out and have someone like Grace peer-review his next research paper after all. He's still glad you didn't do that, though.
If you're a virgin, and I'm a virgin, then who's driving the bus?????
But Qi knows he's a quick study & that there's really no challenge he can't overcome with the power of his intelligence and research skill
Unsuur
Experience Level
Who tf knows, honestly. I'm willing to bet he's got some kind of real experience, at least one sexual partner from his past, but that the experience was rather…underwhelming
So Unsuur, being Unsuur, was like "hm, well, anyway I gotta go take Wilson for a walk or he'll get cranky" & from there never really pursued it until he met the builder
Foreplay
put a rock up his b jk, just make sure to turn Wilson around so he doesn't end up scarred or deviant (freaky little rock ahh). The last thing Unsuur wants to worry about is some other rolling stone showing up at the door with a bunch of googly-eyed pebbles. He loves rocks of all types, but he's only one man.
It's the little things, the domestic bliss!! His partner is up early and making breakfast in their PJs? Ready to go. Builder comes inside all hot and sweaty, covered in grease and grime after a day at the workshop? He's definitely ready to go. Anything that makes them them is what's gonna turn him on
He's just also really well-balanced when it comes to sex, I think. Like, if his partner wants a lot, that's cool he's happy to provide. But if they're not super into it? Also cool. He cares so much more about just being by their side & spending time with them than making the four-legged beast every night
He's a very intuitive person who understands a lot more than he lets on, and I think he's probably the best partner for someone who might struggle to communicate what they want in bed. He'll be paying close attention to all the non-verbal cues and adjusting accordingly. He's quiet himself, so he would have a unique understanding for a partner who also tends to be quiet.
Aftercare
He keeps it simple, small compliments and affirmations afterward to let his Gem know he enjoyed himself & hopes they enjoyed it too
Sharing a glass of water and falling asleep in each other's arms, safe and loved
If it's earlier in the day, he might be feeling froggy enough to make a batch of yellow soup n' lemons too
Being his partner's first
"Oh, it's your first time? Cool." Especially if he, personally, had an underwhelming first time because it taught him that sex isn't just about the act itself, but who you do it with
He's the least likely to care if his partner is a virgin or not, 'cause either way they only have time to get better at it.
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gracieheartspedro · 2 years ago
Text
Cool About It
joel miller x fem! reader
Description: you've only patrolled with him a couple times, which made you kind of hate him. but after a night of subtle flirting at the tipsy bison, tons of alcohol, shooting pool, and making fun of some guy's tattoos, you realize you're really into joel. after you get him, you realize maybe you shouldn't want him.
Part 1/3
PART TWO IS HERE
Word count: 5.3k
Warnings: MINORS DNI! this is 18+, post!outbreak joel, drinking, playing pool(?), possible age gap (not specified really), very smutty, unprotected p in v, fingering, oral (f receiving), overstimulation, dirty talk, multiple orgasms, joel is a menace a bit, ellie is also a little shit haha
hi lovers, how's it going? this is going to be a three-parter, inspired by Boygenius' song "Cool About It". it's gonna be smutty in all three parts so be ready (: please reach out if you have any requests or just wanna talk! I'm friendly I promise lmao
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Met you at the dive bar to go shoot some pool
And make fun of the cowboys with the neck tattoos
Ask you easy questions about work and school
I'm trying to be cool about it
Feelin' like an absolute fool about it
Wishin' you were kind enough to be cruel about it
Tellin' myself I can always do without it
Knowin' that it probably isn't true
You keep your head held high while you walk into the Tipsy Bison, the only bar in Jackson. You were not familiar with the walls of the establishment, but the plan was to get out of your comfort zone. You were good at being a social outcast, and Maria, the only friend you had here, told you to try to break out of your shell. 
So here you are, at a bar. 
Immediately you recognize a couple of familiar faces, including the Millers. 
Tommy and Joel were the patrol leaders for Jackson. You always felt comfortable around Tommy. He was more laid back and funny. On the couple of patrols you did with him, he always made sure the time went by quicker. While serious in times that are pressing, he brought light to darker situations. Maria, his wife, was the first person to introduce you to life in Jackson. She got you set up in a house by yourself and had you start patrolling when she realized you were an excellent shot. She was kind, always making sure you were looking out for yourself and invited you to family dinners sometimes.
Joel was different. 
Very quiet and deadly serious when he was speaking. He made you feel insecure about your abilities, always double and triple checking things behind you. You couldn’t bring your own horse out of the stable without him checking your pack and ensuring you packed extra bullets. 
“You never know what’s out there, girl,” He would tell you. 
You find an empty seat at the bar. Only one seat away from Joel. 
The bartender approaches you, asking what you’d like. You gesture towards Maria.
“Whatever she’s havin’.” 
Maria finally takes notice from beside Tommy and waves at you with a huge smile plastered on her face. It warmed your cold little heart. 
“Hey pretty lady,” She hops out of her chair to give you a half hug, “Glad you are doing this.”
Tommy was looking at you from beside Joel, a smirk playing on his face.
Joel stared forward with no emotion, not even daring to glance your direction.
“How’s it goin’?” Tommy asks, scooting his chair back to begin his way over to you, taking a spot next to Maria. 
You nod, “It’s going.”
“You were on that patrol with the raiders a couple days ago, right?”
He was referring to two days ago when a couple of shitty raiders took down your partner’s horse and almost shot you through the back. You guys got the upper hand, of course. You never went without packing two guns, so you had quickly slid off your horse to find cover behind a downed tree and used a hunting rifle to take two headshots. Your partner wasn’t so lucky. He was an older man and he fell hard when his horse went down. You had to race back to Jackson getting him into the infirmary as quickly as you could. Turns out he broke his arm and a couple of ribs. He would be off patrols for awhile. 
“Sure was,” You reply, “Luckily Eugene got out with just a broken arm. I was happy to be there for him.”
Before Tommy could reply to you, Joel quips up. 
“He told me you got both of the guys between the eyes,” He mumbles, “That true?”
You shake my head positively. You didn’t even want to speak to him in fear that you’d say the wrong thing. He would overanalyze you at the drop of a hat. 
“That’s impressive,” Tommy remarks, “Glad you got out of it unscathed.”
“My girl here is a badass,” Maria pats your shoulder, “Glad you are doing better. I know you were a rattled a bit.”
You take a sip of my drink, noting the intense burn, “Yeah, me too.”
You guys make more small talk, mainly about some recent patrols and what you found. You try to act interested, but the truth was you wanted to go home and read. Your mind was better occupied with made up stories than the stories that were playing out before you in real life. 
“I think we should get home to Ian,” Maria says to Tommy, referring to their newer son. He was about five months now, very cute, and chunky. He resembled your nephew before the world stole him and his mother from you. So you always refused to hold Ian, knowing it would send you into a spiral as soon as his little fingers found yours. Maria understood, telling you she knew exactly how you felt. She’s felt loss like that before, too.
“Ellie probably wants to be relieved of her cousin duties,” Joel grumbles from beside Tommy, “Poor girl doesn’t know what she agreed to.”
“Ian’s sleepin’,” Maria says putting on her coat, “She is probably bored.”
“Tell her to head home when you see her,” Joel comments. 
You have met Joel’s girl more than once. She was kind of stand-offish, intially. Now that you’ve met her a couple times, she was more chatty and goofy. She was a spitfire towards Tommy, which always made you laugh. 
From what you understood, Joel had a daughter before the outbreak. Tommy and Maria keep her name on a little memorial above their fireplace, with Maria’s son’s name scribbled beside hers. You didn’t know the backstory behind Ellie, but you realized the last time you were around all of them, she doesn’t call him dad. Just Joel or old man. Maybe she adopted?
Maria pulls you out of your thoughts, nudging you a bit. 
“Stay awhile, have another drink.”
You nod giving her a gentle smile, “I will. Get home safe.”
“See you around, girl,” Tommy says, giving you a half hug. You turn back to face the bar, noticing Joel’s still sipping on his whiskey. 
You two sit in awkward silence when they leave, not saying much to one another. You drink your second round quickly, calling over the bartender for another one. Joel says he wants the same. Once you get your pours, he finally decides to talk again.
“You still with that one guy?”
You look at him curiously, not sure who he’s talking about. You rack your brain trying to figure out who he’s referring to and then it hits you. 
“Kendrick? Oh no, he’s not anything,” You respond. 
Kendrick was one of your patrol partners. You two hooked up once and realized it was too weird. He was younger than you, which didn’t mean much. But that was a huge factor in his performance. He wasn’t sure what to do. He didn’t know what foreplay was, which meant the sex was dry and not pleasurable in the slightest. 
“It seemed like something the other day,” Joel notes, “Wouldn’t stop staring at you at the town meeting.”
You could not help but notice the slight venom in his tone. 
“Interesting you’re taking notice to other guys who look at me. You jealous, Miller?”
He turns to you finally, his eyes a bit glassy. The whiskey was making him bold, you could tell. 
“Just observant,” He remarks, “He doesn’t seem like your type.”
“Oh, now you know my type?”
He shakes his head at your response, “I imagine you like them a bit older than him.”
Maybe you were overanalyzing the situation, but it seemed to you that Joel Miller was flirting with you. You felt like he was suggesting you were into him. 
Truth be told, you did like them older. You liked a rugged man who was a bit of a mystery. You also liked assholes. All things Joel Miller was. So maybe you were into him.
You lean in to speak to him quietly, “Are you trying to suggest something?”
“Not at all,” He murmurs, “Just answering your question. Am I wrong?”
You purse your lips, “Not wrong.”
Another awkward silence. 
“Wanna play some pool?”
You furrow your eyebrows, not knowing how to respond. You think his goal was to change the subject and avoid more silence. So you just nod, hopping off your barstool. The two of you make your way through some occupied tables to the one empty pool tables. You grab a stick while Joel starts to corral all the balls and set them in place.
You’ve played pool before, but you were never good. Your ex found a pool table once while you two were traveling and he spent hours teaching you how to play. It led to a screaming match. You decided after that, it just wasn’t for you. 
Joel was patient, watching you line up the white ball and hit it with hardly any force, not breaking up any of the balls. You just shake your head in disappointment. 
“You ever play?”
“Yeah, I just suck.”
“Fair enough,” He replies, taking his shot. You guys go back and forth. You getting no balls in the pockets, him getting all the balls in the pockets. 
You ask him about patrols he’s been on recently, trying to make light conversation. You really just wanted to see if your conversation would lead back to where it started. 
It didn’t. 
Instead you two got more rounds of drinks and played more pool. He became more chatty, standing behind you every time you tried to take a shot, giving you advice here and there. Once you stood straight up after finally getting a ball in a pocket, he leaned in a bit. 
“You see that guy over there?”
He gestured towards an older gentleman at one of the far tables. He seemed like the type to have a Confederate flag hanging outside his house. He also seemed like the type to call a woman a slur if they turned down his advances. Maybe you are just a bitch and assuming all of this. Or your assumptions about a man were right, per usual. 
You turn to Joel, glancing up at him. He was close, his face centimeters away. 
“Mhm?”
“He’s got all those tattoos,” He looks towards the man again, “The one on his neck is a skull with one of those Native headdresses. Looks fuckin’ dumb.”
The way he says it sends you into a fit of giggles. He starts to laugh, too. It was the first time you saw him genuinely smile and damn did it look beautiful on him. His eyes crinkled a bit, his shoulders falling in a very relaxed way. 
You finish up your round of pool and decide it’s time for the both of you to retire back to your houses. Conveniently, your house was right off Rancher Street just like his. You grab your coat off the one barstool, watching Joel put on his. 
“We are going the same way, do you mind walkin’ with me?”
“No problem.”
-
You two walked side by side, your steps almost in sync. It was much darker now, the sun set hours ago. You felt like you went through a time jump. You didn’t feel like you spent tons of time at the Tipsy Bison. 
Joel’s house is before yours on the street, so when you arrive in front of his steps, he stops completely.
“Here’s me,” Joel mutters, “You comin’ in?”
“Should I?” You question, stupidly.
“Well I invited you, so yeah,” He suggests, “You should.”
He walks in front of you, reaching for his front door. His house was comfy and warm. Looking around, you could tell he kept it well maintained. It was clean, only a couple dust bunnies lined the hallway baseboards. He had pictures on the walls and blankets littering the couch.
“I ain’t done this in awhile,” He says, sliding his boots off at the front door. You follow suit, not really taking in the words he said. He stares at you carefully, waiting for a response.
“I’m sorry, what exactly?”
He approaches you slowly, his demeanor shifting. He looks down at you, his stature a lot bigger than most of the men you’ve been with, you note. He was broad and brilliantly tanned. His dark chocolate hair was speckled with grays. He had some fine lines on his face, especially where he furrowed his eyebrows 24/7. 
“Brought a girl home.”
His brown eyes grow ever darker, his arm enveloping you for a moment. You don’t pull away, letting him bring your body closer to his. You feel butterflies in the pit of your stomach, something you’ve not felt with a man in years.
“Feelin’ a bit rusty?” You suggest, your hands resting on his chest.
“Don’t know about that,” He mutters, “Do know I’ve been thinkin’ about this for a while.”
His comment takes you back, completely sobering you up. The warmth from the alcohol subsides and you blink at him for a minute.
“What do you mean, a while?”
His face centimeters away from yours, again. You instinctively wrap your arms around his neck, having to get on your tiptoes to do so. 
“Meanin’ every time ’m around you, I think of how amazing your ass looks in those jeans.”
Your heart skips a beat. 
“You’re only now telling me this, Joel?” You ask, playing up that you were annoyed. You were kind of, because what the fuck, you could’ve had him sooner?
“Didn’t think a pretty young thing like you would want me,” He says, “Now I know better.”
He leans down, his lips hardly touching yours. You assume he’s waiting for your move, so you give in first, capturing his lips against yours. It was gentle at first, until he takes notice to how you’re pulling him down further.
He deepens the kiss, pressing your back against one of the walls nearby. His lips were soft, his mustache tickling you a bit. He adds tongue seamlessly, feverishly grabbing you everywhere. Your hips, lower back, your butt. 
I can’t believe I’m making out with Joel right now. 
Your brain stops for a moment when you realize one thing you never thought about before. Where’s Ellie?
It brings you out of the kiss. You pull away slowly, trying not to alarm him too much.
“Is Ellie home?” You mutter, your eyes fluttering open to meet his. 
He looks to the side, glancing out the back window. 
“Probably, but she stays in the garage out back. She has uhm,” He gestures towards the backyard, “Has a whole set up in there. She never comes in here, don’t worry.”
It reassures you enough to bring him back into the kiss. His hands return to your waist, pulling you closer. You couldn’t help but grip his arms, feeling his muscles through his long sleeve. 
“Bring me to bed, Miller,” You moan between kisses, “Need you now.”
He doesn’t say anything before he leans down, hiking your legs up around his waist. He carries you like you’re a light little feather. You use this time to attach your lips to his neck, giving him soft kisses up to his earlobe. 
Joel may be a bit older than you, but he carried you up the stairs like no other 50-something-guy could. He didn’t even fumble, his steps heavy and calculated. Once you two get to the landing, he readjusts you, his hands now holding you up by your ass. 
“Let’s get you out of these clothes,” He murmurs in your ear, walking you into his bedroom. It smells like fresh air, which throws you off a bit. You notice the one window in the corner is cracked slightly, letting in the springtime air. 
He tosses you on his made up bed, making you a bounce a bit. He’s standing over you looking a bit dishelved, his eyes dark with desire. 
He unbuttons his shirt, shaking it off his shoulders. You watch the piece of fabric fall away from him. His upper body is toned, some areas of his stomach and shoulders are littered with scars. The moonlight highlights them, but honestly, they made him hotter. He looked more dangerous, more unattainable for a girl like you. 
“You just gonna gawk?” He teases, leaning down to let his lips meet yours again. In between kisses, he tugs down your pants, leaving you just in your underwear and top. He throws your pants across the room, his hands trailing up your bare thighs. 
“Let me get my top off,” You say pulling away from his eager lips. He sits back on his knees, watching you slowly peel off your top and undershirt. The undershirt has a built in bra that hardly keeps your boobs supported, but it was easier than wearing the uncomfortable bras you usually wore. You throw both shirts across the room before you lean back on your elbows again. 
“Jesus fucking Christ,” He says, his hands reaching out to touch you. He finds your collarbones first, before letting one hand trace the swell of your breasts. He was taking his time with you. 
“You just gonna gawk?”
He smiles. 
“I am gonna ruin you, girl,” He spits. You stare at him with your best doe eyes, trying to see what kind of rise you could get out of him. 
He grabs one of your boobs, before pushing you all the way on your back. His lips trace all over your body before ghosting right above where your underwear sit on your lower tummy. 
“Joel-” You begin, until he starts tracing your slit with his fingers, right over your panties. 
“Hm?” He chuckles, his soft touches making you writhe under him, “What, sweetheart?”
“Need you-” You choke out, “Please.”
He chuckles darkly, “Love to see you beg.”
You knew he was going to be dominant, but you didn’t expect him to be so candid. He seemed so quiet and steadfast in day to day life, so when you see him like this, you knew you were fucked. He was the type to talk you through the whole experience, something you’d never had with another man. Everyone you had slept with was so vanilla. No one was like the guys in the novels you read. Dominant, hungry for more, and vocal. 
“Let’s take these off,” He says wrapping his finger around the band of your underwear. You were so giddy now, you lift your ass a bit so he could get them off you. When you do that, your bare pussy gets so close him that you could feel his breath on your mound slightly. 
“You ever been eaten out before, girl?”
You shake your head, “Yes, but I didn’t really enjoy it.”
“Just let me know when you’re about to cum, baby,” Baby, “I know you will.”
You loved how cocky he was. It made the anticipation almost too overwhelming.
He leans down, his tongue flattening over your slit. You watch him close his eyes and instantly get into devouring you. He flicks his tongue up and down, eventually pressing his lips around your mound. You lose all ability to speak, so when he pulls away, you groan in displeasure. 
He says nothing, just put his middle finger and ring finger into his mouth, covering them in his saliva. He looks up at you, those fingers beginning to trace you up and down. 
“You-” Is all you can say before he’s sinking his fingers inside. He reattaches his lips to your clit, sucking as he fucks you with his digits. The wet squelching from the action sends your head into orbit. You cannot believe how good it feels because every other sexual encounter you had the guy would go in dry, maybe giving you kitten licks, and call it eating you out. But not Joel. Joel knew a woman’s anatomy. He knew exactly how to treat it. 
You just moan out his name, letting his actions take you to that familiar heat build up in your tummy. Usually you had to get there yourself. You throw your head back into his pillows, your eyes crushing shut as you take in the feeling. 
“Hey,” You hear Joel growl, “Eyes on me, or I stop.”
Your eyes fly open, watching him return to sucking your clit. As you stare down, you notice him adding another finger into the mix. The pressure felt so good, your walls feeling everything he was giving you. 
“Can I please,” You are about to let go, but you remember you were supposed to tell him, “Cum?”
You can’t even form sentences. 
He pulls away.
“Since you asked nicely,” His lips are wet with your slick, “Cum.”
The magic word that sends you into pure bliss. Your body quakes while he still fucks you with his fingers. You can only chant his name, begging him not to stop. 
He removes his fingers, smiling at your post orgasm face. You blush, suddenly becoming extremely self aware. You had no reason to be timid or shy now, being splayed out like you are in front of Joel. 
He stands tall over you, making you feel so small in his big bed.
“That was so good baby, but I ain’t done with you,” He pulls you by your legs to the edge of the bed, “Need that perfect pussy wrapped around my cock.”
“Jesus fuck,” You moan, still sensitive from what he just did to you. 
He groans, “Name is Joel. No Jesus here.”
He just had to give into the dad jokes. You slap your forehead in disappointment, making him grin a bit. 
“Got you all nice and stretched, now.”
You realize he hasn’t even taken off his pants in that moment, because he pulls down his tented pants to reveal himself to you. He was bigger than you’ve ever had, which sent you gawking again. He pumps himself, watching your widened eyes. 
“You’re too easy to read, girl,” He mutters, “I’ll inch it in, let you get adjusted nicely.”
You lean forward a bit, back onto your elbows, “You’re gonna fucking split me in half.”
He runs his dick between your wet core, which sends shockwaves up your body. 
“Like I said,” He licks his lips, “I got you nice and stretched.”
Him repeating it made you smirk devilishly. He continued to run his cock up and down your wetness, getting ready to plunge into you. 
When he stops right in front of your hole, he stares into your eyes like he’s trying to read your mind. 
“Fuck me, Joel Miller.”
He sinks into you, inch by inch. You groan in pleasure. The stretch is nothing like his fingers, it’s even better. 
He’s taking his time, pulling back a bit before pushing back into you. It’s slow, gradual. After three pumps, he leans down to catch your lips. He continues to grind into you, the mixture so intoxicating. You moan into the kiss, your mouth opening up for his tongue to slip in. He tasted like you, which was something you never really tasted before. 
“Your pussy was made for me,” He moans, “Fuckin’ hell.”
He sits back, bringing the pace up a bit, his balls slapping into you now. The sounds were borderline pornographic. The panting, the wetness, the slapping. 
“You’re takin’ me so well,” He grunts, “I want to hear you.”
You cry out as he speeds up, “Please, d-don’t stop.”
And he doesn’t. He keeps the pace the same as he fondles your boobs. He pinches your perked up nipples, clenching his teeth. You can tell he’s getting close, but instead of chasing that high, he stops. 
He manhandles you, pulling you up like he did when he carried you up the stairs. He somehow keeps his dick inside you as he finds a seat on the bed. He’s holding you above him, completely switching positions. 
“Want you to ride me,” He says, “Need to see those beautiful tits bouncin’.”
You take up the challenge. You rest on your knees first. You circle your hips, dragging your clit across his lower tummy. You never knew you could feel so full before, especially in this position. 
He just stared at you in awe, playing with your tits as you grind down on him. 
You take one of his hands in your own, placing it right below your belly button. 
“I feel you right here, Joel,” You moan, “Fillin’ me up so good.”
You knew he wanted to cum right there because his dicks twitches inside you. 
“You are one dirty girl,” He growls, “You’re lucky I’m even letting you cum again, talkin’ like that.”
You plant your feet on the bed, finding all your strength to start bouncing on him. He steadies you, bringing his hips up to meet yours. This angle hits different, especially when Joel’s thumb finds your clit again. You couldn’t help yourself, chasing that same high you felt before when his face was between your thighs. 
You look down at him with hooded lids, “I’m gonna cum again.”
“Yes you are,” He smirks, “Cum all over me baby, I feel you.”
Your release hits you, making you fall to your knees again. Your hips girate, the spasming around Joel’s cock sending him into a moaning mess. He lets your settle for a moment before lifting you back up. His dicks slides out, which causes him to hiss and you to groan. Instead of laying you face up, he throws you face down into the pillows. 
“My turn,” He says, dipping his cock back into you. As soon as it happens, you realize you weren’t done. That same sensitivity was back, but this time you felt the burning pick back up even quicker. He’s settling into a brutal pace, grabbing both your ass cheeks and spreading them apart. You turn your head, trying to get a view of him. 
He was watching himself plunge into you, over and over again. It had to be the hottest thing you’ve ever seen. He’s dripping in sweat, his body glistening, clenching his teeth at the sight of your bodies meeting. 
“‘m bout to cum,” He moans, “Where do you want it?”
“Fuck it into me, Joel.”
The words slips out so quickly. The tipping point hit you both at the same time, the spasming hitting you all over again. You scream into the pillows, biting into them trying not to be too loud. He releases himself into you, stilling his movements. 
He doesn’t say anything when he pulls out, you both just breathe out loudly. You felt so empty without him. 
You had never cum so much in one night before. 
Joel Miller made you cum three times. 
Without any help. 
You hear his footsteps trail to his attached bathroom, hearing some water run from the faucet. You return to laying on your back, unsure if you could trust your legs to stand. Joel’s figure returns to the room, a damp rag in his hands. He smirks at you all the while nudging your legs apart. He slowly drags the rag around your sensitive area, making sure to get any cum that was leaking out of you. After he cleans you up, he wipes off his dick a bit. 
He tosses the rag into a basket of clothes nearby. 
“You want any water?”
You take note to how gentle and sweet he was being after being so aggressive towards you before. It was a side of Joel you really appreciated. He wasn’t talking down to you, he genuinely took your needs into account.
“I think I’ll be okay,” You respond, your eyes finally shutting, “Don’t think I’ll be able to walk home.”
“You can stay,” He grumbles, walking to the side of the bed, “We both have patrol in the morning anyway.”
Your eyes fly open, “Shit, I do! Wait-”
“Yeah I’m on with you. For the rest of the week.”
You could scream. This man just gave you the best dick of your life and now you had to patrol with him? You didn’t know how you’d be able to contain yourself.
“Fuck,” You place your hands over your face. You settle in the thought that you needed to sleep if you were going to be alive for morning patrol and you’d worry about your horny desires for Joel.
“C’mere,” He says, pulling you further up the bed. He positions you next to him in the bed, pulling some covers over you, leaving your boobs still out for his viewing pleasure. He wrapped one arm under you, letting it rest around your neck. 
His sheets were flannel and so warm. His scent overtook you as soon as you relaxed into the pillows. One of them is the one you bite into earlier. 
You felt at peace, wanting to stay in this spot for as long as possible. 
“I’ll wake you a bit earlier so you can go home and get dressed,” He grumbles, “And…”
You don’t even realize how tired you are. Before Joel can finish his sentence, you fall into a deep slumber, praying sunrise doesn’t come too quickly. 
-
You wake up when it’s still dark outside. Joel woke you up with a gentle nudge. You shoot up, scared for a moment before you take in your environment. You realize he’s fully dressed already. You groan, rubbing your eyes. 
When you start to slip out of bed, you start realizing you’re still completely naked. 
And in Joel’s bed. 
You plant your feet on the wooden floorboards, using the light from the one lamp in the corner of the room to find your clothes. You could not find your panties for the life of you, so you give up and just shove your legs into your jeans and throw your shirt over your head. Joel lets you wake up in silence, not asking you questions until you make it downstairs. 
“I’ll see you at the stables,” He mutters, pouring warm water into a mug that has a tea bag hanging off of it, “You go get changed.”
He was being short, you could tell. You feel a sinking feeling, like he probably regretted what happened last night. Before you could respond, the back door swings open and a smaller frame enters the dark house. 
“Ellie,” Joel hisses, “What are you doing up?”
Her tired eyes are on you. You freeze in your spot, not knowing how to react or what to say. Your head just races with shitshitshitshit.
“I knew I heard your voice last night!” She laughs, “Y’all have fun?”
Your cheeks heat up instantly, not able to think of a response. 
“Ellie!” His voice is stern and borderline scary, “Go back to your room, now.”
It was a demand. 
She just chuckles, grabbing the door handle and pulling it close. 
“See you around, Joel’s lady friend.”
You stand there completely dumbfounded and embarrassed. Joel sips on his hot tea, not really paying attention to your response to Ellie calling you his lady friend. 
“Go get dressed.”
It was another demand. It sent shockwaves through your body. Maybe your sinking feeling was correct. 
Joel only did what he did last night because of the alcohol. It didn’t change how he’d treat or talk to you in real life. You kind of wished he’d just be cruel about it. Like he would just read your mind and tell you how stupid you were to think this would change anything. 
You felt like a fool.  You don’t say anything as you walk to the door and put on your boots. As you walk out of the house, you promise yourself to take it one minute at a time. Don’t overthink everything. Just let it be a one night stand. Don’t make it about your feelings. Be cool about it.
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carolingarts · 2 months ago
Text
I'm just gonna expound on my Bob headcanons because...yeah. After my "thoughts on Wanda" thing I have a lot of thoughts and I'm kind of annoyed about some of the ones I've seen so let me just - break this down.
AS A PERSON:
this is a man who is familiar with Gen Z/Alpha internet lingo but he tells no one. So when the "New Avengers" are confronted with anything "Skibidi" or Ohio he plays dumb or mildly says "Well you *don't* have aura maybe?" but refuses to explain what the words mean and he won't - unless Yelena asks (and even then Yelena has kind of an idea.)
He can't cook worth shit but he likes baking tons mostly because following recipes is easy as hell, its on a box, it's brownies (and Yelena just side-eyes him the whole damn time but he laughs and shrugs)
If somebody makes a remark about his whole "problem" he just rolls his eyes and bounces it off him with a joke and if he's having a bad day the jokes get nastier (" Look, I'm crazy. I'm not stupid. There's a difference." "C'mon. Throw me a bone here. My life runs the gamut from normal guy to chicken on meth that'd mess with anybody...? man." "Yeah. Well. I'm gonna go sit in my box and take five minutes.") he always apologizes after. He's working on it.
If he remembers to vote he votes Green party. While his favorite was Captain America growing up, when it heads into the fourth of July he just starts to subtly drop hints about how much America sucks. He doesn't really care but he can quote a lot of facts about the failures of American policy. Red Guardian laugh. Bucky chuckles. John takes it very personally.
He fucking hates, *hates* *haaaates* cops. To the point that "oh you poofed a bunch of cops into the void. "huh. that happened. did they come back? ah. well good for them I guess." The comics don't talk about his family but in this case his dad was a cop in my HC so.
He's really good with numbers because the way he got to where he was was doing numbers for drug cartels (this man has an arrest record) and he is very, very good with taxes. So if he wasn't watching Allegra having seen her memories he threatens to look up her tax numbers. ("Are you threatening to kick my ass?" "No. I'll look at your tax returns")
WITH YELENA.
He tends to go to Yelena first to share triumphs and tribulations about anything he's learned or discovered. This also means she gets to deal with any "Sentry" moments. This varies from dealing with his "hey I did a cool thing" to his delusions of grandeur "It's because I'm fucking amazing and the rest of you fucking suck."
It's because he catches himself around her though, and he does, and he apologizes. To her credit she's set some pretty good boundaries with him and he respects that. They have a 15 minute rule if he's having a bad day or he recognizes he wants to share something mental health related.
He's turned her on to playing Mario Kart and gotten Red Guardian to play with them. he will never admit to either of them that he considers them the closest thing to family because he has no idea what their relationship is he just knows he is happy around him.
He has also turned her on to ASMR because it helps *him* fall asleep. She'll never admit some of it freaks her out but he swears it helps so she just humors him because okay sure watching videos of people pretending to brush your hair works and maybe it kind of does she won't admit it.
WITH ALEXEI
he's getting him to teach him Russian.
Despite having done every drug under the sun, he doesn't drink which confuses the hell out of the Red Guardian but having done quite a few drugs himself (as well as drinking), Alexei is probably his biggest sobriety partner. Sometimes people will find the two of them deep in conversation. If Yelena needs a break she'll send him to Alexei and Alexei will just grab him a little like scruffing a kitten with a "C'mon boy. You're talking to me now."
They go for drives. .
He does Alexei's taxes (or at least he tried. Then he determined he's going to prison because he never filed. so he'd go to prison if he tried to turn them in.)
The two of them talk communism with Alexei trying to convert him to a comrade. Bob doesn't care but he humors him.
WITH AVA
bob took Ava's remarks about "not having a childhood" really seriously so he started sending her cartoon recaps because he's obsessed with youtube. Stuff like Rugrats, Cartoon Network, Pokemon. When she asked him "Why" he lied and said that "It might be helpful in training because reading over what kids like might help with dealing with kids". She told him to stop - until she asked for more stuff about anime like pokemon. Just - stop spamming her email.
She's the one who teaches him meditation. His "bad" days are his and he doesn't show them to anybody but the one time she caught him - a rarity - she's the only person that ever has- she taught him meditation to keep himself grounded. it helps. he's grateful.
Sometimes Bob has a tendency to get annoyed with people who his friends are pissed off at which translated to a passed off hatred of Hank Pym, Scott Lang, and Hope Van Dyne. Ava was watching them on TV and just kind of rolled her eyes at them on TV making a casual remark about "stolen valor" for her father's work and Doctor Foster's. Bob's remark, "Do you want them here? I mean I'll hold them down, Drag um down even and lock them *down there* and you can just. Do what you want. Or I will. It'll be great!" No? Okay no. No I mean...bad idea. Yeah. Sorry sometimes...Just slips out." Sorry.
WITH WALKER
He does make the Gen Z/Gen Alpha lingo jokes at John mostly about not having Aura or Rizz. But he'll point out that he was "made in Ohio" technically and when John asks if he's okay or having an episode Bob will feel bad but he keeps up with the joke so he'll say yeah. It's just too good a joke to not keep going.
The whole reason that Bob has done any kind of training at all is because of John and he's gotten really good at it. He can actually put together a gun together and take it apart and put it together. He just hasn't shared he can do it with his mind *really really fast*.
He doesn't "like" the guy but he'll defend the guy. He doesn't like what he represents and he likes what they do to soldiers even less. When he was dealing, vets were some of his customers so whenever anybody from the government shows up he makes sure to dress extra nice and just sit and stare really really quietly trying to be as creepy as possible.
When they get close to either Bucky or John he doubles up on the staring and when Allegra gets close to either of them he'll just move up and sit even closer staring at her directly tilting his head even more animal like before smiling. Then when people afterwards ask him why he behaves like that he shrugs "I don't care what people think about me. They treat you guys like trained dogs. You're not. I don't give a shit what people think. They don't get to treat you like that."
He's not going to bend the shield back into place ever but he did buy Taco bell tacos and buy a big card that said "Have a smashing birthday" and he crossed that out and wrote "I'm sorry I smashed your shield."
WITH BUCKY
He's put together about Sam and Bucky falling out and he is trying to figure out how to approach the idea that Bucky should break away from Allegra. Or they should strike out on their own. Or maybe just disband. He's not sure how to play things yet.
He just doesn't want them to leave him and he doesn't want to leave them either because he's worried that if they leave then he'll snap and he feels like Bucky gets it but he can't talk to Bucky about that so he just kind of haunts him and tires to engage him in conversation because he's seen what Bucky went through and he knows that he might get it.
"You should get a pet." "What?" "You should get a pet man. I'm not saying everybody I'm saying. You. Like I know you've got this tough guy persona to maintain but you just strike me as a dude who needs like, a pet." "...Maybe you need a pet." "I've got a pet." "...No no! It's not you guys! wait that didn't come out right. Hang on it's um. hang on. It's a virtual pet! See it's a tamagotchi! I feed it, play with it. I had a dog growing up...I'm gonna go now."
Bucky doesn't scare him but the void knows that Yelena has to be the first to die, Bucky has to be the second. Yelena is the barrier preventing it's return to power, Bucky is the one who would organize people to stand against it.
WITH ALLEGRA
Allegra is a huge trigger for him. She avoids looking at him and tries to fake mother him whenever she sees him. It's hard to turn off that need for approval but he likes how people stand beside him.
That turns on that protective sense of "I've got to protect these people these people suck and don't want what's best for everybody otherwise they won't try and divide this whole team thing because something bad is coming."
If I really could control this I should just kill her. - is a regular thought Bob's had and it's the one thing he wishes all three of his personalities could agree on.
He is banned from seeing her but he still shows up anyway. It's gotten to the point where people have taken her aside and said point blank "Look. You need to stop asking to see him." "Why? He's-" "It's for your safety. We don't know what to do with him. And we don't know what he'll do to you. He doesn't like you. At all. He likes us. and he might hurt you."
To which Bob would respond, "No no, I wouldn't do thaaaat- I'd just y'know. Remind her. about her dad."
And he just stares.
"But that's private right?"
and he just spends the rest of the day alone and Allegra leaves.
Anyway those are my headcanons.
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toothtalk · 25 days ago
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Next month, I'm getting some cavities filled. I wouldn't care if it didn't mean needles were gonna get shoved into my gums. I'm terrified of needles. Like to the point that I had a panic attack when I thought it was gonna be the same day I found out. Idk if there's any advice anyone can give me about this. They gas me and put orajel on my gums before they stick the needle in, but it doesn't feel like it does anything. Is there anything I could do to make this easier?
hi anon!! this is right in my wheelhouse as someone who also has a severe fear of needles. i’m literally on the national registry of people banned from donating blood/plasma because my panic attacks are so intense. it’s one of those things where different things will work for different people, so i’ll give you a a bunch of ideas of things that have helped both me and patients in my practice, and i’d love to hear ideas from followers too!!
deep breathing. sounds cheesy, but the act of slow, controlled breathing will physically trigger your body to relax. ask your dentist to do the injection as you’re exhaling, as this is when your body is at its most relaxed state. the more relaxed you are, the less painful the injection is. this is how i usually get through any shots i need!!
have someone, whether it’s someone who comes to the appointment with you or the dental assistant, hold your hand or rub your shoulder. having a tactile anchor gives you something else to focus on and will help ground you.
headphones are also a great tool! play something that brings you comfort at the highest volume you can tolerate. when i had my root canal, i listened to the mamma mia soundtrack, and i barely even cried!
some people prefer to have their provider move slowly and explain each step of what they’re doing, while others prefer to have them just shut up and get it done quickly. i’m in the latter camp, personally. communicate to your dentist which is more helpful for you, and as long as you’re respectful about it, they should be happy to oblige!
this is more of a long term suggestion, but practicing radical acceptance has changed my life. it’s been part of my therapy work for some time now, and it’s really difficult at first, but it can really make a difference. essentially, you have to accept that the shot (or whatever other unpleasant event) is going to suck, and you are going to hate it, but it will only last a few minutes at most and you will get through it. practicing this has actually reduced my anticipatory anxiety a TON, because i know i don’t have to put on a happy face or pretend it’s going to be fine. i can feel my feelings, i can cry, whatever feels right in the moment. the important thing is reminding myself that it’s a temporary discomfort that i will survive. this usually involves explaining to the doctor “i’m going to cry when you do this, just ignore it and do your job, i will get through it.”
however, do make sure you’re staying still. a moving target will make it more difficult for the dentist to get the injection in the right spot, which will probably make your experience that much more unpleasant. this goes hand in hand with the deep breathing; that should help keep you still enough that the dentist can hit the target the first time.
this one may sound silly, but i’ve found that if i close my eyes, i can sometimes imagine that i’m not getting a shot at all. when i feel the pinch of the needle, sometimes i ask myself in my mind “oh, what’s that? that’s a strange sensation! it could be anything!” and essentially keep that mental chatter going for the thirty seconds or so that it takes for them to finish the injection. a lot of times it’s the visual that’s more terrifying than the actual pain of the shot, and it can be more of a mind game than anything to try to stop that panic from building.
try to remind yourself that you’re not the only person that has this fear, and that your dentist has probably seen plenty of people who are scared of the numbing shot. there’s nothing to feel embarrassed or ashamed about. in fact, you’re being super brave for getting your fillings done even though it’s scary!! know that not only i, but the entire community we have here on toothtalk, are so proud of you!!!
i hope one or more of these ideas is helpful to you, and please let me know how it goes for you!! and remember, if your fear starts to stop you from getting your dental work done altogether, there are options such as sedation dentistry that exist for that exact reason. my practice offers sedation and we have a ton of incredibly anxious patients who absolutely love it; some people even drive from up to 4 hours away to get their work done under sedation!!! the most important thing is to find what works for you, and what enables you to care for yourself effectively. you are awesome and YOU GOT THIS!!!!!
LEGAL DISCLAIMER: This blog is for educational and informational purposes only. This does not constitute providing medical advice or professional services. Information on this blog should NOT be used for diagnostics or treating a health problem. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified dental health provider regarding diagnosis and treatment of a dental condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this blog.
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tiredslepz · 1 year ago
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ONLY YOU, GIRL - pt. 1 >
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ʚ٭ɞ · how the genshin men (scara/kuni's part) show that it's only you. use of kuni!, a bit of ANGST but its hurt/comfort so dw, will prolly edit this later
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You've always called him your pretty boy, which wasn't a lie. He could be a model, if it weren't for him dating you. So, of course, naturally, he gets tons of compliments from the girls at the market when he goes to buy goods for you. He doesn't care, really, since he only loves one person—which is you.
It only comes to your attention when you go with him to the market.
"Oh my god, he's so hot," you hear a voice from a girl on the stand besides him. What the hell? Can't they see that his literal girlfriend is there? You sighed, brushing it off. Your boyfriend didn't seem to notice either, as he inspected the fruits carefully.
You're already finished buying what you need when the same girl comes up to him. "H- hi! Kunikuzushi, right?" she stutters, probably nervous. Your eyes narrow at the sight, but you don't say anything. "Hello?" he scoffs at her, which only seems to fuel her. "I thought you were cute, so, I uh," she handed him a paper with her number written on it, which he accepted. "Thanks–" she quickly scurried back to her friends, squealing. Your brows furrow as he pocketed it, walking back home with you as if nothing happened.
You don't say anything, of course, because you're a secure girlfriend! Right? Well, that's what you thought. After numerous occasions, with different girls, you got sick of it, and decided to confront him. You see him laying down on the couch, scrolling on his phone.
"Kuni," you walk up to him, an expression on your face that he only knows as bothered. "What is it now?" he sits up, placing his phone in his pocket. "About the girls." you huff, now sitting besides him. "What about them?" he raised a brow. You knew he wasn't trying to come of as, well, that, but it sure felt like he did. "I mean," you groan. "the fact that you're accepting their love letters?" you also knew he didn't know how to express his feelings properly. "It's not like I actually talk to them. Plus, I thought you were teaching me how to be kind?" he crossed his arms, his tone taking a defensive side. You hated whenever this happened. "I am, but in the way that you reject them kindly! At least tell them you're taken?" you huffed, the anger bubbling up. He huffed in response, looking away for a moment. "Kuni–" "[Name]," he sighed, cutting you off. "I threw away the letters, okay? I didn't know what to do, and," you hear him groan, since he wasn't used to.. opening up. "i just thought you'd want to keep our relationship, lowkey, or whatever you called it. I do love you. I only love you, [name]."
Your brows lifted, eyes widening slightly in surprise. You took his hand, holding it tightly. "I want everyone to know that I'm yours, Kuni," you sigh, a bittersweet smile on your face. "Is that so?" he looks back at you, moving closer to you on the couch. "I'll make it up to you." you blink, then nod slowly. "How are you gonna do that?"
He simply laughs, cupping your cheeks. "Oh, [name]." you simply sighed in response, the smile still on your face, leaning in. The last thing you see is his grin, right before he pulled you in for a kiss.
You learned not to doubt his love for you after that.
a/n: insert that one audio LETS FUCKING GO?? I GUESS?
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phantomrose96 · 1 year ago
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Hey not to go all "tumblr is a professional networking site" on you, but how did you get to work for Microsoft??? I'm a recent grad and I'm being eviscerated out here trying to apply for industry jobs & your liveblogging about your job sounds so much less evil than Data Entry IT Job #43461
This place is basically LinkedIn to me.
I'm gonna start by saying I am so so very sorry you're a recent grad in the year 2024... Tech job market is complete ass right now and it is not just you. I started fulltime in 2018, and for 2018-2022 it was completely normal to see a yearly outflow of people hopping to new jobs and a yearly inflow of new hires. Then sometime around late-spring/early-summer of 2022 Wallstreet sneezed the word "recession" and every tech company simultaneously shit themselves.
Tons of layoffs happened, meaning you're competing not just with new grads but with thousands of experienced workers who got shafted by their company. My org squeaked by with a small amount of layoffs (3 people among ~100), but it also means we have not hired anyone new since mid-2022. And where I used to see maybe 4-8 people yearly leave in order to hop to a new job, I think I've seen 1 person do that in the whole last year and a half.
All this to say it's rough and I can't just say "send applications and believe in yourself :)".
I have done interviews though. (I'm not involved in resume screening though, just the interviews of candidates who made it past the screening phase.) So I have at least some relevant advice, as well as second-hand knowledge from other people I know who've had to hop jobs or get hired recently.
If you have friends already in industry who you feel comfortable asking, reach out to them. Most companies have a recommendation process where a current employee fills out a little form that says "yeah I'd recommend such-and-such for this job." These do seem to carry weight, since it's coming from a trusted internal person and isn't just one of the hundreds of cold-call applications they've received.
A lot of tech companies--whether for truly well-intentioned reasons or to just check a checkbox--are on the lookout for increasing employee diversity. If you happen to have anything like, for example, "member of my college Latino society", it's worth including on your resume among your technical skills and technical projects.
I would add "you're probably gonna have to send a lot of applications" as a bullet point but I'm sure you're already doing that. But here it is as a bullet point anyway.
(This is kind of a guess, since it's part of the resume screening) but if you can dedicate some time to getting at least passingly familiar with popular tech/stacks for the positions you're looking into, try doing that in your free time so you can list it on your resume. Even better if you make a project you can point to. Like if you're aiming for webdev, get familiar with React and probably NodeJS. On top of being comfortable in one of the all-purpose languages like C(++) or Java or Python.
If you get to the interview phase - a company that is good to work for WILL care that you're someone who's good to work with. A tech-genius who's a coworker-hating egotistical snob is a nuisance at best and a liability at worst for companies with even a half-decent culture. When I do interviews, "Is this someone who's a good culture fit?" is as important as the technical skills. You'll want to show you'll be a perfectly pleasant, helpful, collaborative coworker. If the company DOESN'T care about that... bullet dodged.
For the technical questions, I care more about the thought process than I do the right answer, especially for entry-level. If you show a capacity for asking good, insightful clarifying questions, an ability to break down the problem, explain your thought process, and backtrack&alter your approach upon realizing something won't work, that's all more important than just being able to spit out a memorized leetcode answer. (I kinda hate leetcode for this reason, and therefore I only ask homebrewed questions, because I don't want the technical portion to hinge at all on whether someone managed to memorize the first 47 pages of leetcode problems). For a new hire, the most important impression you can give me is that you have a technical grasp and that you're capable of learning. Because a new hire isn't going to be an expert in anything, but they're someone who's capable of learning the ropes.
That's everything I have off the top of my head. Good luck anon. I'm very sorry you were born during a specific range of years that made you a new grad in 2024 and I hope it gets better.
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moonsaver · 1 year ago
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THANK YOU FOR READING MY RAMBLE ABOUT THIS SLUTTY MAN, I have love-hate relationship with Ratio :3 (YOUR WRITING IS AMAZING AS ALWAYS)
BUT ALSO, ANOTHER RAMBLE HERE CAUSE YOU'RE MY FAVORITE WRITER!!
I don't know if you feel uncomfortable/weirded out with this, but if you do! Please do delete this if you want, it's your choice!!
Imagine a child, it can be one of those children in Penacony or other planets. But I pick the child from the Penacony! Walking up to Ratio and S/O, who is probably bickering as per usual or just enjoying one of another times (Secretly, since Ratio wants to be a secretive or this is same past-rebelious but now Professor S/O!)
As the child tugs on S/O, calling them pretty and hugs them. THEN PROCEEDED TO BE LIKE "kay now, you're my parent/mother/father"
LIKE:
"Hey miss/mister/mx! You look very pretty/handsome/unique! Will you be my parent?"
IMAGINE RATIO REACTION, *IF* THE KID IS GONNA BE LIKE
"oh, you're going to be my dad as well/other father/other parent!
OR THE OTHER WAY, HOGGING S/O ATTENTION. Clinging On S/O, regardless how many times S/O tries to get the kid back at their actual and real parents here, and would sometimes spend time hanging out with the kid while also trying to search for the kid parent
(AND ALSO I'M GOING TO SEND SOME RAMBLE ABOUT ROBIN (if you Dont mind!) MY BABY DESERVES THE BEST)
Hello anon! Always happy to answer brain rots and imagines and rambles hehe. Glad to see you back in my inbox!
Also, so cute hehe.
I imagine Dr. Ratio is actually pretty good with kids. The thing with kids is most of them love asking a shit ton of questions, the most ridiculous kinds at that. And you know those people who are so damn smart and knowledgeable in their field they start thinking about possibilities of ridiculous ideas as actually plausible? Veritas would kind of teeter on that when it comes to kids and their imagination. I just can't help but imagine kids crawling all over him while he has a rubber duck in his hand and explains like.. hawking radiation to a kid who's just staring blankly at him.
Honestly, kids would love him. Hes the strange, serious man who always bends down and tells you really confusing but fun stuff about things and seems to know everything. To them, hes the "actual adult".
I imagine, in the case a lost child approaches him or him with his s/o, his first instinct would be just to gauge the general state. He'll simply watch as you pick up the kid and coo at him and all the willy nilly stuff, just glancing over and checking for injuries, signs of anxiety or confusion, frustration, or fear. After he's done looking over, he'd try to ask the child about where their parents are when they perk up about how both of you are their parents now.
Well.. he doesn't know how to respond. You see his eyebrows raise slightly at the kid's remark, but he brushes it off, and starts telling the child all about your embarassing history if you were the rebellious professor!s/o. If you aren't, just about any silly memories he has of you are at the tip of his tongue, and that you really aren't suited for a parental figure. Even if you try and shut him up, he'll simply turn to the kid like, "do not let those who oppress you, silence you." Or something lol.
He doesn't mind the child being all over his s/o, telling them how pretty they are, asking them if they want to be their parent, and so on. Kids are silly, and illogical. It's in their nature to say anything that comes to mind. Of course.. he's slightly sour inside that your conversation was cut short, and now the child's hogging all your attention, but he vehemently pushes it down, simply resolving to search for their parents with you.
It's not soon before the both of you finally find them. Veritas gives them a stern, subtle warning about losing their child while you comfort them, bidding your farewell. It slightly annoys Veritas when the child clings to you, refusing to let go, and all his parents do is laugh it off, saying "they're just very social!" Or something. He has better things to be doing, really. He just walks off and lets you take care of things from there.
If you ask him if he's jealous, he won't say anything, and stare deadpan into your eyes before shrugging it off and changing the topic back to what you both were discussing before. Both of you can have more productive conversations, really.
Although.. his thoughts teeter a bit, and he shortly ponders over what kids with you would be like.. would he want children? Maybe one.. or two.. or even three..
Ugh, he's thinking too far ahead. He resigns to simply paying attention in the present, and listening to you ramble instead.
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hyacinthleaves · 6 months ago
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can i request some affection hcs for ulysses or kai (maybe both if you're feeling up to it)?
Might as well get them both out of the way‼️
Ulysses Wilhelm:
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I feel like he would get so flustered if he's not entirely exhausted
So handholding is the furthest he can get without being too flustered to function at first
Even then it's obvious that alone has an effect on him. it's easy to tell that it grounds him
You know what else he like, forehead and nose kisses. Please give him one everyday he'll be happy
I feel like he's so used to taking naps with you that every time he takes a nap by himself he feels like he's missing something
That's probably another reason why he chooses to stay up so much
Please let him lean his head on your shoulder or lay in your lap
If you do the same then he'll be too stunned to even think about moving
Love letters, anyone? I feel like that's one of the easiest ways to get his feelings across even though he still feels super embarrassed writing them down
Will make you coffee when he makes his own if he knows you like it (and honestly if you don't want it, what's preventing him from drinking two cups)
He likes spooning because he doesn't get super embarrassed by being able to see your face so that is one of his favorite ways to cuddle. Now let him be the small spoon LMAOO he prefers being held. However that doesn't mean he doesn't love holding you as well
Kai Monteago:
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Imagine the clingiest person ever
Now think clingier
Like if he has free hands, they are ALWAYS on you
Around your waist, your shoulder, on your thigh, on your face like DAMN
It's like he's one of those people to make sure you're still there
When he doesn't even have a hand on you, he feels like there's something missing. Like you know that feeling of when you feel like your phone isn't in your pocket? That's what he gets
Since he hates not being with you, he also wants to do a shit ton of activities with you too
If it can be a partner job, then it will be
I was wondering if he wouldn't want to look like you two were involved with each other on the internet for the sake of your privacy but the thing is, if someone sees you in public, it's gonna stir up some controversy anyway because Kai can only hold back so much
He can only try to manage it from there
Whenever you have to leave him, he'll give you one of his rings or bracelets if you're early into your relationship with him
Later into your relationship I feel like he would get you a promise ring or a darry ring
And remember when I said he's clingier than the clingiest person ever? Now imagine when he's sad or scared. He literally gets glued to you
I'm so used to writing for embarrassed characters that I forget Kai will kiss you ALL THE TIME. You ask for a kiss, you're getting one. You're getting one even when you don't expect one. He loves you so much
Let him lay on you and cling to you like a koala while he rants about his day
He's a lot but you already knew that before you got to this point
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silkythewriter · 1 year ago
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Hey, hi, hello! I had this idea for a Vox x reader that won’t leave me no matter what I do. I know you’re probably sick of writing for vox so much lately, so no pressure to do this! Take your time and don’t feel pressured to get it out soon! :D
What if Vox had a short s/o- I just barely realized how short the demons in hell can be and I think would be interesting. Like- what if his s/o just constantly walked on their tippy toes so they don’t seem as short as they really are compared to Vox? I also think it would be hilarious if his s/o was ever in an argument and they just randomly got Vox to pick them up because they want a height advantage.
-🃏
★Vox with a short! Reader���
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Warnings!: non pure fluff!
Fandom!: Hazbin hotel
Author note: HI OKAY I DUNNO IF THE OG REQUESTER IS EVER GONNA SEE THIS BUT GENUINELY I LOVE WHEN U REQUEST!, and thank you so so so much for checking up on me last time!, again thank you for requesting and I know I have some of your other request in my inbox so I’ll definitely go take a look LOVE YOUR IDEAS SORRY THIS IS LONG (💧。•́‿•̀。)
Summary!: Vox with a short! Reader ( ̄▽ ̄)
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“Look at me
I'm as helpless as a kitten up a tree
And I feel like I'm clinging to a cloud“
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OKAY, OKAY, BUT LIKE HE DEFINITELY LOVES THE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE.
Don’t get me wrong, this man would love you whatever height you’re at, but man can he admit he loves when you have to snap your neck up ward just to look him in the eyes. He finds it hilarious. 
He teases you a ton, he blames you for his back problems, having to bend a bit down to kiss you. (Definitely not that he looks like a gremlin in his work chair hunched over stacks of papers)
Don’t get me started on the names he gives you, quite literally calls you doll cause he just loves how short and small you are!
Oh and that thingy you do with your tippy toes? To try and seem just a tinny bit taller? He also finds that hilarious!. Literally watched you struggle to balance yourself and purposely scares you so you slip up a bit and you end up landing in his arms. He’s a charmer what can he say?
Hates when someone else teases you though, that’s his bit, who do they think they are???
Likes looming over you as you do something, he can’t and won’t explain why he likes it he just finds it enjoying
For April fools’ he actually left a bunch of stools around your shared apartment for you (which…actually was very much needed for you, which he burst out laughing at)
He does find himself looking at you from afar and spacing off, he just finds you cute, everything About you, even your height!, he can’t help but just admire you for a bit.
Carry’s you bridle style, girl, boy, or in-between doesn’t matter to him. He loves how small you feel in his arms.
Val and velvet calling you his elf is probably the worse teasing you faced there but if it upsets you Vox is quick to silence them.
Now we’re heading into the topic of arguments…(メ﹏メ)
“Look at me in my eyes when I talk to you!”you huffed watching him roll his eyes “Fine.” Vox says as he picks you up. You two broke into a giggle after that 😭
Whenever your stern talking him he turns his screen into a camera so you can see what he sees needless to say you didn’t talk to him for a week.
When ever you two sit together he uses you as an arm rest here and there messing up your hair but he really couldn’t care much (ಡ‸ಡ)
Likes having you in his lap as he works like I said in my last post about him, he can’t help it. You truly are like a doll to him and he just enjoys having you in his lap and holding you in his arms.
Cuddling is definitely easier as he opts to big spoon most of the time, but if you figure out a way or want to be big spoon he won’t protest to much. He finds it cute like a little koala hanging off his back ( he has stated this out loud before and burst out laughing with you ( =ω= ) )
Purposely calls you to get an item he intentionally put on the high shelf of a cabinet literally his favorite thing to pull on you
“Honey, mind grabbing the popcorn?, my new show is about to come on” he said sweetly as he pointed to the pantry from the couch. You shrugged “sure” you said getting up as you dug through the pantry’s bottom and middle shelves but coming out empty handed and confused. “I think we ran out…” you trailed off knowing you saw it yesterday in there. “Oh, I must have moved it, check up there” he said in a fake remorseful tone as he again, pointed his finger only to the top shelves nearing the roof. “Vox!” You groaned turning your head up as you heard him chuckle behind you.
Picks you up randomly when your not budging and just takes you himself 😭
Overall, he genuinely finds your height adorable!, and aside from teasing, he does really finds you cute. And is careful not to hurt your feelings most of the time…(unless he’s having a particularly bad day) but always makes up for it!. He loves you, and he’ll make sure you know that. ♡´・ᴗ・`♡
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AHHHHH I LOVE WRITING THIS THANK YOU SOSOSOOS MUCH FOR REQUESTING I HOPE YOU ENJOYED PLEASE REQUEST AGAIN!
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