#(he’s mostly a good baby)

[alienzil]

Nanny Danny

“That is a whole ass baby,” was the only thought running through Lex Luthor’s head when the scientist proudly showed him the tube containing Project KR. It was not remotely the sort of thing he would normally think and most definitely not what he had expected to be thinking the first time he saw the clone.

He’d been pleased when he’d read the reports indicating the success of KR after years of failures. Lex had poured millions of dollars and literally his own blood into ensuring a clone of the alien could be made, one that would be under his total control instead of the unknown aspirations of Superman.  He’d wanted to see the fruits of his labors personally but this…

It. No, not an it. He scrunched his tiny face and smacked his lips and…did he smirk? Was that HIS SMIRK on that baby’s face?! No. No. Babies this small didn’t smile or smirk. They passed gas and their sleep deprived and addled parents mistook it for an intelligent response. He’d heard enough inane conversations in the Lexcorp office about the various progeny of his employees to pick up on that but still. This child had Kryptonian DNA, not to mention his own contribution. Surely, he was far more advanced than the dribbling potato shaped lump of an infant whose pictures he’d been forced to smile and nod over when Mark from accounting had rudely shoved them in his face at the last quarterly budget meeting. Yes, that was definitely a smirk. His, that was his smirk.

“So as you can see its growth is well within expected parameters and we’re planning to start phase one of accelerating the maturation process tomorrow once the testing is do-”

“Take him out.”

“Sir? The testing can all be accomplished while it remains in the tube. There’s no need to-”

“I said, take him out. The project is cancelled.”

“What?! Mr. Luthor you can’t!”

“I think you’ll find I can. Now get me my son.”

*****

Two years later

“Call them again”

“Sir, I’ve called them seven times. They won’t answer.”

“Then call another agency!”

“There isn’t another agency, Sir”

Lex glared at his assistant who stared back at him impassively. Mercy stood by the door staring off into the distance and pretending she didn’t notice him being bested by his own secretary.

He stopped himself from shouting again and took a deep breath before asking, “Then what, exactly, do you propose I do Mrs. Anderson? Adjust my entire schedule around naptimes? Find a toddler size lab coat and safety goggles and bring my son with me to tour the new clean energy project on Thursday? Perhaps buy a tiny business suit while I’m at it for the next board meeting?”

“I’m not suggesting anything of the sort, Mr. Luthor. I’m telling you that no childcare agency in Metropolis will return my calls anymore. Most won’t even answer.  You’ve gone through 27 nannies in the last 3 months. You need someone better suited to your son’s…special needs.”

Lex snorted. “Special needs might be a bit of understatement. He can lift a car over his head and his favorite word right now is No.”

He sighed and rubbed his forehead. “Thank you for…clarifying the situation, Marjorie. If there’s nothing else, you can leave.”

His secretary didn’t move. She looked at him like she was waiting for something and now that he was paying attention, he saw she was holding a file.  “Did you have a suggestion?”

Looking pleased with herself she responded, “Actually, yes, I did.”

“Well?”

She set the file on his desk and flipped it open. He looked down at the first page and raised an eyebrow, “What am I looking at here?”

“This,” she responded pulling out the top set of papers and spreading them out, “is the employee file and background check for Daniel J. Fenton, an intern that started in our engineering department about 4 months ago. He has one sibling, two parents and several close friends he regularly meets with. His current supervisor has nothing but good things to say about him and reports he gets along well with all his coworkers.”

She set out the next set of papers, neatly arranging them on the desk to be easily seen. “These are newspaper articles and screenshots of social media posts regarding a small town vigilante locally known as Phantom. The same small town, Mr. Fenton is from coincidentally. Also coincidentally, Phantom made his first appearance only a few weeks after Mr. Fenton was involved in a minor accident in his parent’s home laboratory when he was 14, the medical records for the incident are included.”

“Hmm,” Lex said observing several photos of Phantom and a younger Fenton arranged in order of similar poses and facial expressions and printed out side by side.

“Finally,” she said handing him the last set of papers directly, “this would be a report from the lab Mr. Fenton works in from an incident that happened yesterday. A test with a new protype went wrong and started a fire. Everyone evacuated per protocol when the alarms went off but one of the other interns was working on a programming issue off to the side of the lab while wearing headphones and didn’t hear the alarm or notice the fire. Mr. Fenton noticed his absence and returned to the lab to get him out.” She stopped talking and let him look at the last several pages in the file, a series of photographs of the lab.

“Is this ice?”

“Yes, it is. It’s several inches thick and covers half of the lab. It completely put out the fire leaving minimal damage.”

“This machine was moved?”

“It was. It was very close to the flames and would have required replacement if exposed to extreme heat or cold. That particular piece of equipment also weighs several thousand pounds and was bolted to the floor.”

Lex read through everything in detail then clasped his hands under his chin and stared at the photo of Daniel Fenton for several moments before turning back to his waiting secretary.

“Have HR send Mr. Fenton up. I’d like to offer him a promotion.”

[blanceyblance]

Funniest thing about Peri ships is that everyone came to agree that 1. He has horrible taste in clinically insane men and 2. If you actually look closer he is equally or more insane than them, he just hides it better

[brethilach]

gollum is a little freak but I genuinely get so upset thinking about him because we know that was still a lil freaky even before he and deagól found the ring but he very well would've had the opportunity to have a good live and BE good if they hadn't. and no matter what happened afterward, he couldn't go back home. even if he confessed to his crime he very likely would've still been kicked out of his community, or at the very least socially shunned to the point where he might as well just leave anyway. the ring would've consumed him no matter what, and for no fault of his own (or at the least, no faults that would ever warrant some cosmic punishment amounting to what the ring Did to him). by the time Bilbo found him he was far, FAR past the normal lifespan of a Hobbit. After the Ring was destroyed Bilbo began deteriorating at 130, and he had only beaten the current record for the longest Hobbit lifespan by a single year. Gollum was at LEAST 3x older than that. Very likely more. No matter what happened—even if Sam was a little kinder, Faramir was a little gentler, or Frodo was able to fully reach "Smeagól" in the way he so desperately wanted to, even if he helped destroy the Ring himself, or he didn't fall into the fire—Gollum would've died with the Ring. Even if the Quest FAILED and Gollum successfully claimed the Ring like he wanted, he STILL would've died (because Sauron would have never let him hold on to that thing for hundreds of years again, if his body could've even handled that). There is no reality where Smeagól would have a happy ending, whether he was "redeemed" or not. Yet all of it was such a fundemental factor in the success of the Quest (and even Bilbo's success during the Quest of Erebor). Definition of Doomed by the narrative

[irregularbillcipher]

so god forbid i’m seen just as an average human being

[isatoru]

when he scrunch like

[lillymakesart]

my new OC: cempaka!

she is based on the story/universe that my friend @haydardotjpg's OCs indra and yuwei exist in! pls go checkout haydar's art he is amazing!! his ocs can be found more easily on his ig but if you're lazy this is his oc indra (cempaka's one-sided love interest) and yuwei (indra's fated lover)

also, cempaka means "magnolia" in malay!! (she gets a flower name bc my name is lilly which is also flower c:)

bonus first iteration under the cut!

i accidentally had "poinsettia" flower in mind when i did this iteration instead of an actual magnolia, hence the color scheme. but yeah, this is as self-insert as it gets LOL like she's literally MEEEEEE but still very different and i love her as she is <3

[letsmcfreackingloseit]

Hey-ho! I'm back again with some Apex Polarity art, but this time it's some designs for the humans' snow gear!

It started out with me just trying to figure out a design for y/n in my little comic, but then I thought it would be fun to also try and visualize the other humans, so here's my take of y/n, Vanessa and Michael! I really like how they turned out, although I don't think I got Vanessa's "patchwork" look quite right, but I still like where I landed. I added a blue scarf and I was really tempted to give her those red goggles, since it would've made her resemble Vanny even more, but in the end I desided against it.

So yeah- nothing too big this time, just something fun and easy!

But to round this off, I will of course credit the wonderful author @naffeclipse who is writing Apex Polarity, which you can go read if you click right here (can 100% recommend, especially if you like stories with a bunch of fluff, mystery and drama~!) and today I give credit to myself for the designs of the humans! ;P

[skyloftian-nutcase]

This prompt is your free ticket to write GanonDad stuff! I'll take anything as long as Ganon's being a good dad :3

Ganondorf had never seen the sea.

Some called the desert a sea, or said that it used to be one. All Ganondorf could see in the desert was death.

He'd heard tales of it when he visited Castle Town. People described it as endless, in varying shades of blue that could swallow one whole. It had sounded fantastical and exaggerated, powerful and enticing and so foreign he could hardly put a picture to it. It hadn't mattered all that much back then, once he'd realized the sea didn't have water that was actually drinkable - what use was it to him, then?

He'd learned of its depths when he met Nabooru. There was a teenager who went by that name in his barren wasteland, spunky and capable but defiant. But when he was brought to this new land through Din's blessing, he'd met someone of the same name who was far different. She was the Gerudo's chief.

She was more than just a chief, though, she was a queen. She didn't just lead a small group of thieves picking at scraps in the desert, she ruled over an entire civilization.

Ganondorf had challenged her, of course. He was the rightful ruler of the Gerudo, after all.

He'd lost.

Despite his anger, despite his attempt to overthrow her, Nabooru spared him, letting him stay in the outskirts of her capital city, Lagema.

Ganondorf felt frustration and jealousy boil his blood. He'd had the power of a goddess at the point of being executed by the sages, yet when he needed it now, Din stole it away from him. Instead, he was left to suffer the indignity of seeing a Gerudo prospering under someone else's rule.

It was almost as if Din did this just to show him he couldn't succeed. And he would not let that stand.

But the longer he lingered here, the more he saw of these people, the more he saw her...

The woman was bathed in power. She wore it like the fine silk head scarf she sometimes showcased for celebrations. Red, dripping in precious gems, jingling with every step from decorative jewelry all over her arms, her belly and hips, her ears, her wrists, and her ankles, strong in stance, muscles sculpted by the goddess Farore herself...

And her eyes. Bluer than the sky, infinite in their depths, drawing him in every time he looked at them, daring him to try her, calm and quiet and dangerous. They held the vastness and power that people spoke of in relation to the ocean, all encapsulated in such beauty.

He’d finally seen the sea. And it was breathtaking.

Ganondorf had never felt this way before. He didn't know what it was. He just wanted to get closer to her again. To fight her, to prove himself, to win.

It was maddening. It was invigorating.

It was far worse when those oceans actually looked at him, when they focused on him. He could hardly articulate himself sometimes when they started to speak, and he despised that. He stepped up more, became bolder, and as time passed, this woman became more than just a challenge; she became an adventure, and, eventually, a partner.

When their children had been born, he'd never suspected he'd find her ocean eyes in their little boy.

It was fascinating, beautiful to watch how their children reflected them. Hemisi bore her mother's facial structure paired her father's amber eyes and leaf shaped ears. Merovar was the spitting image of his father, but with his mother's eyes, captivating in their blue. They didn't reflect the silent power that his mother bore, though - they were ravenous, hunting for whatever his ambitious heart could reach, just like his father. Despite this, though, Hemisi was the one with true fire, rambunctious and temperamental and the superior warrior.

His twins were his world. He’d never been so utterly overrun by so many emotions, so dedicated to others. He’d build and destroy kingdoms for them.

Many moons after their birth, Ganondorf found his son on the balcony of their palace, staring out at the night sky. The streets of Lagema were still vaguely splashed with color from the festival, though the harsh winds and sands were slowly washing it away, bringing a drab tan back to the world as they prepared for the moment of truth.

The world was silent in anticipation. Hemisi was fast asleep, having let her father carry her to bed after he'd told her and Orik a story. Nabooru was gathering forces in the other settlements. Orik was resting, blissfully unaware of what was to come.

Merovar glanced at Ganondorf with his ocean eyes, blue coloring near black in the darkness, face uncharacteristically worried.

"What is it?" the Gerudo king asked quietly.

Merovar sighed, looking away. "The assault. It's going to change everything."

"For the better," Ganondorf pointed out. "Don't tell me you're having reservations like Hemisi."

Hemisi had argued time and again that they didn't need the Triforce, that an ancient sacred relic didn't matter because they had what they needed. Nabooru looked at it more as a potential threat if relations between the Gerudo and Hyrule broke down.

Ganondorf saw an opportunity. He'd desired this power most of his life. Once he'd learned of its existence here, he'd renewed his search for it. Merovar had seemed on board.

"I... don't know," his son finally said, looking at his hands resting on the balcony railing. "Such power is... I want it. But we're going to start a war."

"Not necessarily," Ganondorf assured him with a rumble of satisfied amusement in his chest. "They won't stand a chance against us once we have it. It'll be a skirmish at best."

"And then?" Merovar asked, glancing back at him for guidance. "Will we really rule over it all?"

Ganondorf rested his hand on his boy's shoulder. "Yes, we will. All of Hyrule will be ours."

Finally. The winds of Hyrule would belong to him and his family.

His children. He'd share this prosperity with them. He'd protect them with it. His entire life, Ganondorf had been looked to for safety and guidance - it had been an expectation a s a burden. But now, he finally felt... happy to give it.

He moved his hand to sweep up and down his son's back briefly, a promise of love and a reassurance. Merovar relaxed under the touch, smiling a little, excitement glittering in his blue eyes like stars in the night sky.

But it hadn't gone that way. The Triforce had fractured, the world had gone awry, and war had broken out.

And one by one, his family had fallen apart.

Nabooru had turned against him. They'd fought, and she'd died. Ganondorf repeated over and over that she had started it, that she had attacked him. His hands didn't tremble as much anymore thinking about it. Instead, all he felt was rage.

The rage grew when Merovar fell in battle. When Hemisi was captured and subsequently betrayed him. His grief was inconsolable, dying heart replaced with a furnace of pure hatred. He didn't even see the fear in his little girl's eyes anymore when he fought her, Link, and the queen that final day.

Yet time and torture had a way of cooling such hatred. Solitude brought contemplation. But resentment, fear, hurt remained.

And on a battlefield millennia later, Ganondorf froze at the sight of blue cutting through a sea of armor.

A blue scarf. Just like Link. A fierce cry of rage. Just like Hemisi.

And those ocean eyes. Just like Merovar, like Nabooru.

That day, Ganondorf saw the sea once more.

[just-an-enby-lemon]

I was very nostalgic over the HTTYD book, but unfortunally the collection I read as a child belongs to my brother and is with him back home. Except this week I discovered the David Tenants audibook and that someone slime tutorial-ed them.

So now I'm listening to "How To Be A Pirate" and as someone who read the books soon after the first movie (and loved the books so much) I always knew Toothless is a very diferent characther (and look movie Toothless is lovely and very sweet but book Toothless is my child, my lil chaos greemlim) but only know I actually got the difference:

Movie Toothless is a very smart pet while book Toothless is a very energetic human toodler in dragon's form. Fifteen years old Hiccup got into the florest and found a very well-behaved and smart if dangerous pet, lifetime companion and best friend. Ten and half years old Hiccup was throwned into a dragon's nest and now he is responsable for a feral two to five years old who can fly, eats A LOT and breaths a tiny bit of fire. He got the job of a pareting older brother and everyone else acts as if he either got a pet or a servant while he is trying to convince his toddler-dragon that showering is important.

[cluescorner]

I gave myself a writing challenge and I am fascinated by it

So basically I put the robins in a randomizer to give them a new order/role (because I just...kinda wanted to see what would happen + I like role-reversal AUs) and got results that are giving me a fucking brain blast.

Stephanie, the first sidekick who defines the role

Tim, the sidekick who dies and comes back wrong

Dick, the sidekick who saves Batman from himself

Damian, the sidekick who was never supposed to be a sidekick but would go on to prove everyone wrong

Jason, the youngest sidekick who is still the Kid Wonder

...So this is fucking wild. I've got some ideas and several of these fit perfectly (Dick's role is pretty similar to his one in canon), but some of these are fucking INCREDIBLE to explore (Steph being the first Robin is something I never even considered but tbh I kinda love it).

I probably won't write a fic or anything because tbh I don't like publishing my writing that much, but I might expand this into a full AU and post about it. I might randomize other stuff too (ie, stuff that I cannot change vs stuff that I cannot keep the same) but this fucking rules as a starting point.

[koszmarnybudyn]

Sooo I've been rereading To Put The World Between Us once again... and I finally got around to drawing stuff for it yay. The unidentified corpse apron is my personal favorite.

@stained-glass-cicada thank you for writing it, it's really good and i hope to actually draw a full piece for it :]

[luck-of-the-drawings]

EPISODE 2 AND 3 HAVE BEEN SOOOO FUN im already so emotionally attached to each of these characters.. if anything bad ever happens to any of them im killing everyone and then everyone.

[xayspancakeee]

the tender night upgrade that shook us-

please please, let me kiss and suck your collarbone baby. grrrr~ (っ˘ڡ˘ς)

missing xavier hours is real and it’s taking over my soul. ( ｡ • ᴖ • ｡) to my fellow xavier girlies, sending you my love in this desperate time of xavier drought (at least until his bday hahaha).

[spicylove4ever]

Zed with the "love consultants" for if the Guardian is back in town: Zed: in any case, the Guardian doesn't know anyone around besides Mirrin. Would it be the worse thing ever if I gave a call? Makkaro: no, no, Zedrathaw. I wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. It would be the fourth worst thing. Number one: a super volcano. Number two: that Calamity demon or whatever it was called comes back and destroys it all. Number three: the Piscis family hold a memorial to the Mahan family and they broadcast it to the entire world. Fourth: Zedrathaw gives the Guardian a call. Five: my loving darling spouse here is eaten by a kraken. Darling: I am said spouse, and I approove the order of that list. Zed: Kindra?! Darling: Zed, the Guardian could be your great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-greatgrandparent!

[mixelation]

velocity vs async tori and minato pointing at eachother and screeching

i think both toris could look at each other and be like "yeah okay, i can see how that could happen to me, however i am not going to emotionally engage. please NEVER tell me any details"

async!minato is the most cursed and terrible thing velocity!minato has ever seen. what if he killed him

[yuridovewing]

i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.

what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.

in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?

obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)