#(even tho I created her lol)
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2024 reads / storygraph
Outdrawn
f/f contemporary romance
two cartoonist who’ve been rivals since uni, and now have competing webcomics online, have to work together on the relaunch of a cult classic at the comic press they both work at
they both struggle with art-related physical and mental health issues, and complicated families
#outdrawn#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#sapphic books#I thought this was decent! I liked the concept (even if I got distracted by some art related things…)#and the dynamic between the characters was good. I enjoyed their relationship development broadly speaking#and the emphasis on communication; though it was a quick flip into being together all of a sudden.#The sketchbook doodle flirting was cute. Some interesting exploration of their complicated family situations too.#There’s a lot of exploration of burnout and carpal tunnel and the dangers of artists overworking which I think are important conversations#and are done with some nuance. But it’s pretty much all discussed in the context of the personal pressure they put on themselves#rather than the industry corporate greed and artificial competition created by the comic platform - which are significant in this story!#It felt odd that that connection wasn’t really ever made?#I know that this is a romance and nitpicking the background plot is beside the point and also that I am not a big romance reader#but the premise that the comic hosting site archives everything; wipes the leaderboard; and out of nowhere has a comic competition for#new weekly chapters…I’m sorry but the art world would riot. Even if people enter because they’re desperate for the cash they’d be pissed#People live off the income from their webcomics! if they were erased (temporarily) with no notice…..there would be crimes committed istg#I simply don’t believe that it would be doable to create a new weekly webcomic with no notice while you also have a full-time comic job#(especially as the only stylistic choices mentioned are full-colour) - not to mention what happened to their 8-years-running webcomics#that were archived? they don’t think about them at all after the beginning? surely they’d care about that?#And then with their new comics they make for this competition (after work I guess) we get vague snippets about them but barely anything#- if they’re consuming that much of your time I would expect to feel like they’re thinking about them all the time#rather than the vaguest discussion about genre and cast numbers only.#I guess I just think the whole comic site stunt felt unnecessary for the plot anyway -#it would have worked exactly the same if they were just competing on the normal leaderboard with their normal comics???#anyway - I’m not judging TOO hard about all that because again I know it’s not the point and maybe the industry is like that in some place#Unfortunately it was distracting enough to affect my feelings on the book tho lol.#Lastly: the audiobook………oof. The narrators talk at different speeds; for one.#And Sage’s VA does this deeply weird raspy-anime-teen-boy voice for Noah which is such an odd choice#and doesn’t match her character at all.#unforch my library only had the audiobook (what I usually prefer) so I just had to sort of….translate the narration into a normal voice lol#anyway the romance is good tho
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something about being told im 'the leading person at this whole academy when it comes to interpretation and stage intelligence' by the husband of the woman im trying (not really. but i mean. who knows) to seduce... ok boy you got me. lets make it a polycule.
#im playing it all cool and funny now but atm i legit burst into tears lol#like he said i have a 'good voice too of course' but i know realistically that is not my strongest asset#and even if i were technically perfect. which im NOT lol. the voice itself is just nothing special. it's there ig but that's about it#but its nice to know i may not be 100% useless after all#(just 90%)#also apparently the most feared and respected professor who came to the concert said. again. that he likes me the most.#which again. crying real actual tears about this all rn this means literally the world to me this is everything i have#and i have no one to share this with because im not gonna say it to my uni friend cause i dont want her to feel like im boasting or sth#(even tho she has no such qualms herself but probably because i know how. not great. it feels when someone keeps talking about themselves#and about how great they are and how easy everything is for them. i dont wanna do it back at her.#well there's also the fact that i dont think im great and this is not fucking easy to me at all lol#but idk i think the difference between us is that she actually admitted she sees no point in singing if she cant show off (thus she hates#the duet we're singing because she sings the lower part and cant show off her high notes or coloratura.#which is like. an insane take to me. i mean it i get it. kinda. if i had a voice like hers maybe id be like that too fuck knows.#but that just feels so. idk. sad to me. so self obsessed and empty. like you dont care about the music itself? about you being a part of it?#also immediately made singing with her not fun anymore. i thought we were creating something TOGETHER. but thanks for the confirmation#that you only really care about being 'better than'. yikes.#like idk this behaviour is funny and iconic in old school opera legends like yes go bite each others dicks off.#but it hits completely different when it's your own colleague let alone your friend. like damn girl. damn)#) anyway. the husband is kinda hot too now that i think of it. i really should seduce them both.#except its realistically not possible since they've both seen me cry now (she saw it like a hundred times lol)#so ive lost the hot and mysterious card alas. no uni professors romance for me
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Saw the Barbie meme and had to draw Barbie and Becca!!
#if they had a ship name it would be BarBee 🥰#they got arrested for theft#theft of what??? my heart#and one day I will nail down how to draw Barbie#(even tho I created her lol)#percysarthell#my art#the fernweh saga#fernweh saga
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Dude I actually have SO many discarded fankid designs like Emmie has gone by three different friend groups and even for the current lineup there have been some forgotten kiddos you guys actually have no idea how many fankids I've designed NSKXBSKXBKX
#and yet emmie has survived all of this#maybe that's why she has changed the most#because the rest i just dumped JSODJSKDNSKX#no but like#at first i created a group of four kids#there was a knouge kid in there for those who keep insisting for one#i actually dont like these pairings#and so emmie was the one survivor who was joined by sparks#and then with emmie and sparks i made ANOTHER GROUP#which i think consisted of six fankids???#and that's when aim came to be#the other three kids are gone#AND THERE WAS MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT A SALLICOLE KID#her name was techna but looking back destiny is definitely a better character lol#ALSO YEA I DESIGNED AIM WAAAAY BEFORE LASH#lash i designed on her own#then i decided to post aim make him go public BAHBSKZBSKX#and then i created bria tulip and destiny all on their own#AND THEN WHEN DESIGNING SPADES SHE WAS ACTUALLY PART OF A WAVE#she was designed next to two other characters who were later dumped#then i designed another kid that i lost their design -cries- and im not sure if i should actually add them???#and ive been designing some other kids but i dont think ill post them#maybe one??? they're too cute i don't know im tempted#i don't know if they even count as a fankid tho lol#but yeah i just felt like rambling about this BAHZBAHXBSKXNS#shale and mareep aren't the only forgotten kids/hj
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why are they laughing at him as he gets straight up killed??? he doesn't deserve this! he's a sweet kid at heart! he literally just needs one (1) real friend!!
#jack facts#willow and xander and tara all got that exact type of chance and you could argue the same is true for cordelia and anya!#and why don't we just not even start in on angel#like jonathan went from attempted suicide to so grateful for one moment of attention he created a whole award to give about it#to IN ONE YEAR becoming so powerful a witch he seamlessly altered the perception of the entire population of the world#without any adverse effects to himself and only the one (1) flaw that is inherent to the spell he used#to all but instantly giving up that power when he realized it posed danger (that he understood) to people#to feeling genuine remorse for doing that even tho he needed it explained to him why they were so upset#and making every apparent effort to learn that with humility and offer whatever wisdom he could in return#to... this.#like why tf didn't anybody say hey man are you doing alright after being suicidal?#hey man the spell you did was wrong but that doesn't mean you can't do magic anymore why don't we meet up sometimes and study together#or better yet he could have mcfuckin joined the coven god damn#like they went from witch being a relatively gender neutral combo of innate talent and learned skill in early seasons#to now we're supposed to forget the boy willow and amy did spells with in hs + the fact that giles himself was in an all male coven#and even believe that only Special Girls like willow and tara can do any significant amount of real magic at all#why on earth is willow the biggest witch of ever and started out floating pencils and then having a whole plotline#about learning to use her power ethically and control herself and practice temperance and etc#AND anya gets to be a good guy even though she has to be taught about ethics and consent and compassion and all that too#but jonathan's thing is being soul crushingly lonely and having no self esteem but being incredibly sweet once given the time of day#and is instead relegated to two bit loser villain?#why because he's the Actually Uncool type of unpopular instead of the Too Smart And Nice To Be Popular type of unpopular?#makes me sick he literally just needs a friend. just one genuine friend who cares about him personally. that's all.#and it's not like they're doing a ''this is what happens to vulnerable kids when no one cares about them!'' thing which would be different#no they're just like lol he's unpopular like our protags but he's also short with a nasally voice! which means he's bad!#once again i swearrrrr i'm not doing armchair psych on a creator based on the content of their work#please i swearrrrrrrrrrrr i'm not doing that i prommy i know it doesn't work that wayyy i knowwwww#don't worry about ittt i'm so totally definitely not doing that at allllll#anyway
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oooooo please tell me (who knows nothing on the subject) about orv swap au
hehehe. hehehehehehe. hehehehehehehhehehehhheheheh <- guy who is so normal
the premise of orv swap au (name has yet to be finalized) is this: what if kdj and yjh swapped narrative positions (reader <-> character) but very little else? what if a video game player enters a time loop to save his favorite character from dying over and over again and also to end the apocalypse?
admittedly it's not super fleshed out yet (a lot of the changes this premise would introduce are still not hammered out yet) but here are some points under the cut (novel spoilers ahead!)
orv swap au starts with pro gamer yjh who feels :/ abt his job, but hey, it pays the bills. despite (or maybe because of) his relative popularity as a pro gamer and networking with the agency/sponsors/people to impress, he's kind of isolated in a way that's detrimental, a facade of someone he's not whenever he's on camera
something to play around with is the idea of agency? maybe this yjh doesn't feel like he has any and has his hands tied between the lifestyle and being under public scrutiny and not having enough of a support system to leave everything behind. maybe he doesn't know what else he would even do. maybe he's aimless and drifting with nothing to hold on to.
his favorite video game is what i've been thinking of as World's Hardest To Play Indie Game (not based on difficulty but just on the experience of consuming it) a boring, exposition heavy, player-hostile, poorly designed, slightly buggy mess of a barely-playable game: twsa, a game that was not finished upon release and experiences with sporadic updates every now and then.
the ending tree to this game is so convoluted its insane. also theres no save states so if you die (very likely) u restart babeyyy.
twsa (video game) does have multiple endings, all of which happen when kdj, your main character, dies. some are farther into the apocolypse than others, some paths require meta knowledge of future events or character actions or items or whatever. the "true ending" is either analogous to the original 1863: kdj makes it to the end at the cost of everyone he loves, or hsy's modified 1863: kdj makes himself enemy of the scenario to secure a way out for the kimcom remnants.
there's branches on the choices tree where everyone dies and everything sucks and is bad forever and theres choices to make where kdj gets to make a family and they don't really get to settle down but they can get pretty close to it among the ruins of the apocalypse. through all his testing, yjh finds that these endings are nice but peter out - to get to the end of the apocalypse yjh has to claw his way there inch by painful inch, through betrayal and sacrifice, and he still cant fully get past it
i originally wanted to finagle a yoohankim 3 way swap but i couldn't figure it out. swap aus are a lot easier to work with when they're even numbers, at least to me, so this au features a ysa who is a video game company employee by day and by night she really has become god this time (and also a terrible indie dev). and this is how jungdoksang can still win !!!!
also yjh's coworker from Real Life hsy :) i haven't decided if she's like an employee for the same agency, or if she's someone else in the gaming circles that yjh interacts with sometimes (in my heart theyre in like some sort of discord server together), or something like that but she's around. whatever she does she is twitter cancelled for something. to me.
the only other character swaps are lsk and yma. yma is yjh's estranged sister (in broad strokes there's a vague bad parent situation going on here) (they used to be close until they drifted apart and slowly started hating each other [there is an abyss between them that neither of them can bridge]) (he feels that she betrayed him and threw him under the bus so he left [maybe he gets kicked out]) (she feels that he abandoned her to whatever situation they have going on [he didn't even try to take her with him]) and he has to find her when the apocalypse starts. yjh older sibling to yma gives us a whole different little dynamic to explore from kdj ysk (there's different levels of responsibility and guilt and blame when you're talking siblings that are soooooo interesting to me. sorry that i see any set of siblings and immediately try to figure out how to make them worse)
lsk is kdj's mom who appeared into existence at some point with kdj and they were both just adults. that's weird isn't it. oh well. i guess she can become a transcendent later too for funsies
everyone else stays in the same configuration of Real Person vs Character to me this is a very important aspect
this point has no precedent with the swap, nothing particular that would change to cause this, but it would be so funny if lgy was a little gamer boy who is an avid yjh hater. hates that guy. shows up to competitions to boo him. tunes into yjh's silent no-mic speedrunning streams to mald in chat but yjh +mods don't ban him bc its kinda funny.
anyways the apocalypse starts when yjh and his coworker/fellow gamer hsy are on a train to twitchcon and lgy is also there (also headed to twitchcon) and he brings bugs because he likes them but also to sabotage yjh specifically. its just funny if this happened. you understand
instead of having reader-related skills and abilities, yjh's skills are video game player based! he gets flavor text insight on people, location, and items, things like that. notably, he has the ability to reset, to bring himself back to the beginning of the apocalypse
orv swap proper follows yjh as the Player of the Game (Consumer of the Narrative) who lives hundred of lifetimes in this ruined-world-become-reality "replaying" [read: time looping through] the game to reshape it to save his fave character from self implosion (kdj with no dissociation is very prone to dying. all the time.). to revisit the idea of playing with yjh and the idea of agency, of creation, the only way to get past the apocalypse is to go off the beaten path, to choose options that weren't even there in the game. when in space, at his darkest point, yjh becomes a writer. in this story, at his darkest point, he has to become a creator too
please do not ask me how the epilogues go i dont know how the epilogues go (i don't want to throw yjh back into a train for milennia after he Just went through a thousand resets so i'm sending kdj for that but i havent fully planned how or why)
anyways, hope that helps!!! :)
#orv au#orvswap#i think i will main tag this. just the one tag tho. poorly planned au be upon ye.#orv#orv spoilers#<- for blacklists!#i only realized after creating this au that this is just how p//mmm goes except its videogame themed and hater lgy is there lol#anyways wheres that post that says time loops are about tragedy and theyre about saying i will make this right#and secret third thing time loops are about love#also each individual dynamic for the creater-player-character triangle in this is so interesting to me to explore like#you have the new kdj-yjh one (mostly similar tbh. was the crux of the au after all) which is a fun space to play in#but then you have a brand new kdj-ysa one to work with which is !!!! a writer and her character. a creator and her creation#and then you have ysa-yjh as the creator and her audience of 1!!!!!!! where is yjh that he needs to be saved? how does ysa answer that call#to love to the point of creation.... to tear the world asunder..... to create the worlds most unplayable rpg.......#lets meet again in another life. ysa reaches out toward yjh but cant reach him before she wakes up. cant quite tell him its not his fault#and Dont Even get me Started on yoo sister dynamics ill go insane#because theyre siblings but for a while (and def at the beginning of the story) it hurts to be around each other (its a betrayal#its a pang in your chest its a you were supposed to protect me and you were supposed to love me and i dont even know you anymore)#but also the swap means the 4th wall eats yma and leaves yjh begging for her back ('dont you hate her?' 'shes my little sister'#which is neither agreement nor denial but also both at once)#its ya boi#tango mango#anyways thanks for the ask im very normal about the ask
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Jjk is ending this year (YIPPIE \^o^/!!!! I’m tired of the misery and MY princess died so fuck my life-) but I will definitely be interested in reading more of Gege’s works whenever he comes back with something new. I’ve read his other one-shots and can see the pieces that he’d taken from those, using them in jjk and it’s so fun noticing them??? Recognizing things that Gege had given more juice, more thought too and expanded on in JJK. The fun thing is, those one-shots weren’t even bad imo. They all had interesting premises for sure, especially the one about the little girl and her “weapon,” guy (who legit looks like he was a prototype for Gojo even though we know that Gojo was inspired from a minor Naruto character 😭… I really enjoyed that story a bunch! It really could’ve been something tbh. It had a lot of potential. If Gege went back and revamped it a little, especially since he used a lot of ideas from this one-shot in particular for JJK (so he’d probably need to come up with some new stuff tbh), this story could really be something!) Look at the main guy 😭… so Gojo core…..
#his hair is red tho lol#rambling#even the expressions and the craziness sjsjsjs#kind of obvious that the god weapons were just proto cursed tools lol#really cool#I loved the main duo sm#you can never go wrong with an adult child duo in a story so long as you don’t make it creepy 🗿 like a lot of mfs end up doing#this little girl’s ‘CT’ is op as hell tho she can just create living human beings and that’s just… through her in jjk so that she can#recreate my favs but not in the#‘came back wrong’ way that gege loves sm lol#I really liked the characters from this one shot sm uhh
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ok its really funny that the title smt indicates the importance of a female goddess but when it comes to the games outside of 1 and 2 its like. Who.
esp for me personally. i assume in nocturne the goddess is meant to be aradia? If so thats the only one where i care about the goddess. But TDE totally destroys her significance so like. Lol.
In smtiv i just like. Burroughs doesnt add enough and really just complicates and confuses story components so i toss her out when im writing. Which is so funny its like yeah ill just pretend shes siri >> she is a god. She has no presence in smtiva so hilariously smtiva supports tossing her. smtiva doesnt really have a goddess either like. Lmao.
Strange journey has so many women in it idk who the goddess is supposed to be but i dont think anyone actually fulfills that role, redux or originally
smtv has tao but then its like half her content and like all explanations about whats going on with her was left on the cutting room floor so like. Her impact is sort of wrecked.
#Shitpost#tbh. I hate how TDE renders all other endings irrelevant. Like. Utterly#its interesting but its soooo shitty that nocturne has basically an indisputable canon#And its like. Will i ever see the other endings#no. Lol.#vs like strange journey even the og endings are worth seeing because then you understand what Alex seeks to modify#and why the new ending literally exists. It actually builds on it. And theres something awesome there with like#not choosing the new ends despite Alex and being like. Nah i do think the world you see as hell is still the right world to create#and all smtiv endings good and smtiva only has the two main ones (technically has 4 tho) but its so so good#Smtvs endings are interesting but a liiittle less fully formed because the alignment lock is. So late#but still.#anyways. Tldr who tf is this goddess thats having a revelation. i dont even know her.
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I thought that being pirate themed Sol! Omega could be obsessed with treasure hunting as to conquer all the treasures before Captain Whiskers.
But treasure hunting is more Rouge's thing, what means then that should be left for Sol!Rouge...
Oooooooooor, this could be a shared interest of both Sol!Rouge and Sol! Omega
Oooooooooor Sol!Rouge could be more of an explorer/wanderer/traveler, more interested in seeing nature than finding treasures
Anon I am kissing you on the forehead.
Changing around the interests of Sol Rouge and Omega 100% works for me, as I don't want them being carbon copies of their chaos dimension counterparts. Blaze and Rime aren't exactly the same as Sonic and Shadow after all! So a treasure hunting robot? Who's decided actually, I want to keep this hard earned treasure for MYSELF rather than give it to Captain Whisker? Perfect. Incredible. I love it. That's got the same chaotic neutral vibes as Omega, but not necessarily centred around destruction.
Sol Rouge being an explorer also slots in perfectly with the vague idea I had of him being the one to wake Rime up rather than Eggman Nega - sort of merging the two times Shadow got woken (first by Eggman and second by Rouge). So he could have found her while exploring! Finding treasure can be another interest of his, as if you're exploring a new area you're bound to find something! So that definitely could be a shared interest. Being an explorer also means Sol Rouge would probably get along well with Marine, and could take her along on adventures :]
#answered#genuinely thank u so much i love these ideas and will be implementing them for sure!!!#i think rime would end up working with nega for a bit at first like if she finds out he's related to gertrude#(a hundred years down the line)#but i don't think nega would go looking for her bc he's more about tech while rime was created by magic#like he might not even believe she's real until she actually shows up at his door LOL#this is of course retconning nega being a descendant of eggman. i'm just making him the sol version of eggman btw#maybe he still time travels tho idk lmao. still figuring that out#rimeverse
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arcana mc would not be me though i’d hop out of the country with asra instead of staying behind
#now i kinda wanna draw asra…#and my mc for the arcana AND my SI because i decided i need 2 indulge even MORE#my MC is so cute though 💜 main character energy fr#i created her initial design to work with julian’s well#but then it kept morphing into more purple tones + softer features#goddd and i’m so upset bc like. i got some fuckin ROCKIN designs for them.#they’re all SO good and i will praise myself on this fact.#i especially like joanna’s (mc) masquerade fit (based off a phoenix!! bc it’s fitting to the story n it’s COOL)#i rlly like my SI’s palace casual and masquerade and winter look#maybe i’ll do a little doodling. hehe.#btw i don’t support the arcana n all that shit ☹️. i’m still disappointed.#how can u have the best character ever in ur game when u r AWFUL….. disrespectful.#i will still b talking abt it tho on the rare occasions… just pretend they r my characters and my world ok ? ok.#i don’t even wanna know what the fuck they’re doing rn. they got some weird shit going on rn ig LOL#SI is similar to obm MC except they got a tan bc it’s fuckin HOT in the arcana universe. and obm mc is so fucking pale because well#it’s DARK THERE. !!! they gotta take vitamin d supplements
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Okay but like I really need to rant about this a bit so like spoilers for ep 3 of tlou below but like
idk I’ve never played the game so I had no idea what to expect going into this, but when Frank showed up, I was like “I can’t tell if Bill is going to kill him or marry him.” WELL. Nick Offerman did such a GOOD job of looking on guard and uncomfortable. His shoulders are like up to his ears the entire meeting sequence and it made me so jumpy, and then we skip 3 years and he’s so visibly relaxed. And my heart started to melt. And I found myself so enamored with these two men who, against all odds, found love in a situation where that should have been impossible. Frank was the last alive from a group fleeing a collapsed quarantine zone, Bill a preper who had decided to be alone long before the pandemic even started. We expect Bill to die the whole time--comments about him getting old faster than Frank, getting shot by raiders. The jump to Frank being sick...they showed so much through his paintings. You weren’t expecting it, and they showed you through his art how his illness has been progressing, and how him being able to see that himself affected him. They showed how Bill broke down and made a deal with Joel to get medicine despite saying he never would. This show. THIS SHOW. I was sobbing up until Bill became weirdly calm during the dinner, because I realized he’d made the decision too. They died on their own terms in a world where that had become nearly impossible. They had a beautiful life together in a world where that had become a pipe dream. Two characters that we never even meet thru the main characters, not in the present day, but who matter so much.
#also i have a lot of feelings as a chronically ill artist about everything with Frank (not bad ones! just like i feel a lot 🥲)#it hit close to home#honestly bill resonated with me too but not bc of the preper conspiracy theorist part lol#more bc of the self-imposed solitude and not seeking out relationships#i know from other posts that this is nothing like how they were in the game but this seems like such an improvement tbh#like this episode deserves awards for how much it hit me in the feels#tlou hbo spoilers#the last of us spoilers#it's 5 am so like i am not coherent but i also cannot sleep#idk how we got my horror-hating mom hooked on this show and now we're making her sob over gay romance like#that right there tells you this show is good lol#i feel like i could write an entire book on how illness can impact art and handwriting#my handwriting became that of an entirely different person when i started to get sick#my drawings changed too#tho maybe not in a way anyone but me noticed#my friend who has a similar health issue just with more presentation had to give up art almost entirely#idk it's a kind of hard i can't explain and that i dont think you can understand unless you've experienced it yourself#seeing the progression of your symptoms in the things you create#seeing how you're unable to hide it even with care#idk man#it's honestly an emotion i dont think i could name#but i feel it so strongly every time i look at more than a few lines i've written by hand#or at a page of studies ive drawn#i feel like they never made frank a tragic character. they never made illness tragic#they just made it real#the tragic theme was the idea of one without the other and it went both ways#they hit on that repeatedly throughout the ep#and in the end they didn’t have to face that tragedy#idk i feel like it’s one of the few depictions of chronic illness/terminal illness ive seen that doesn’t play the illness as tragedy#and i found that…refreshing
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I'VE BEEN SAYING THIS
Has it already been proposed that Hatsune Miku is essentially the digital age successor to the cultural niche originally established by Betty Boop, did I see that somewhere or is it a weird thing my autism told me
#IM SO HAPPY SOMEONE ELSE WITH MORE FOLLOWERS POINTED IT OUT BECAUSE EXACTLYYYYYYYY#i have specifically old cartoon autism and betty is my absolute favorite of all time forever and ever amen#which unfortunately means i have to make a slight correction that she was created in 1930 🫣#and also umm im sorry im being pedantic. she was associated w the jazz age 🫣🫣 her friend sally swing represented swing though!!#also highly recommend the short “a language all my own” which was a tribute to her many many loyal japanese fans#its so cute#and shockingly non racist considering the time period. because actual japanese artists and languag consultants were involved lol#i mention this bc it really illustrates her irl celebrity status within her own universe its oddly meta#anyway one of my reboop ideas leaned heavily into her “fictional celebrity ascended to irl celebrity” status#perhaps i could even include miku. they could collab#im sorry im sorry im sorryyyyy i love her so much#ive been meaning to draw betty in so many different like...contexts. idk if i should be doing other cultures traditional clothing tho#anyway shes basically like a doll in the same way miku is. where she can be placed into so many different contexts and dressed up#and she'll fit anywhere!!!!#im sorry. im sorry i have no reason to be getting so anxious and possessive shes not my character. i have to keep reminding myself this#keep tag#betty boop#fleischer#anyway like so. anyway. she was in fact intended to be like a real life celebrity. which is why her shorts were always framed#as “betty boop in ____” or “____ starring betty boop” like shes an actress playing a role. i love it so much. i love her so much#sorry. if you want i can keep going i can give an exhaustive history of betty boop lecture if you want#anyway betty boop is miku's grandma#idk who the grandpa is i obviously want to say koko as a betty/koko fan but idk what his situation is down there quite frankly#i think it might be a balloon animal. to be honest
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Leftovers gone bad (Patreon)
#Doodles#Just Desserts#Villainsona#Still vent-like! Helped put my head in order anyhow so - helpful :)#Sweet Coffee to lower Charm's anxieties hehe <3 Who could have ever guessed how accurate he'd be!#I really do need to sit down and give everyone names he deserves one! He's only ever had the one name (not Coffee lol)#His first attempt wasn't great lol way to intentionally misinterpret his meaning Charm#It's hard to be positive in that kind of mindset but he's trying to help!#Coffee does also have foot-in-mouth syndrome tho so there's that lol#Doesn't Try to minimize or callously redirect he really does try his best he's just still a bit clumsy haha#This was never his practice! He's always been a troublemaker of a kind!#He's just getting his practice in haha#Oh yeah and he gets a new outfit since I was offline while drawing him pft#He's always been androgynous he's allowed to have the clasps on the other side - even if it does make him off-model lol#He's always had masculine closures on his clothes now that I think of it....I think? Might need to go through his backlog actually#Then again I'm talking about the character he used to be and not necessarily who he is now lol - moving character from fandom to fandom#ANYway lol#Isn't this supposed to be about Charm or something who's the main character again pft#Charm's canonical least favourite feeling is feeling foolish! It's The Feeling that makes her seek out the Staff#But! She's (trying to be) reformed! So that's not really an option! Doesn't make the feeling go away tho#She carries the same response with her since she hasn't figured out how to healthfully respond to it#So anything that creates That Feeling is scary! She doesn't have an out! Feels cornered - and that stress adds to it#What if This Thing makes her feel That Way when she doesn't want to! She /wants/ to trust and love and be happy and healthy#But the precedent#Reminding her that she doesn't have to repeat her actions just because it Feels a certain way is important!#It's not something you have to run away from or lash out against - it hurts but it's momentary#Promise :)
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I am being bewitched by the random card au once more. I <3 inventing more and more ways to ruin characters lives with magic bullshit I pulled out of my ass
#rat rambles#band posting#random card au#this is abt kasumi and nanana btw Ive been thinking more abt how the water curse works#the two had very different experiences with it tho mostly because kasumi was able to fight against it for a lot longer#still only like an hour but thats an eternity compared to nanana's like 5 minutes lol#nanana mostly succumed as quickly as she did because shes a spellcaster meaning that her body has reshaped itself to funnel magic through it#much faster and with less resistance than a non spellcaster would#that isnt to say the curse struggles with a normal person but that her specific body structure made it particularly fast acting#kasumi on the other hand had some mild experience with magic but mostly through much more external sources#basically using physical objects to create magical effects instead of actively channeling it#she also just fought back extremely hard which ended up in it being all the worse by the end#basically nanana melted and kasumi exploded#it wasnt too gorey tho since the whole deal is that it turns their bodies into water and keeps their souls tied to it#asuka did get to see it happen tho which did not help with kasumi trying to convince her to carry on the rebellion#its ok eventually she caused an even bigger one anyways despite her best efforts#and kasumi is still around in the main story even if she is in a fish tank in rinko's office#nanana has a lot of worldbuilding relevance and does appear once but is only rly relevant by association to the curse and her history#she basically only appears to tell ako yeah your family sucks sorry bro#but shes important To Me I love her so dearly#oh to be the first to fall yet the last one standing#nanana is mostly just hanging out with the other water ghosts nowadays (emu is also there fun fact)#she got a lil too silly so sad#they're doing better than they could be tho at least they have their own lil ghost town#except for kasumi but hey she has uhhh. rinko ig.#eventually tsukishi gets her out of there tho dw#god this is reminding me I Really need to worldbuild fairies more#theres like 3 of those bastards and one of them is actually mildly important + they Need to exist for other worldbuilding shit#maya is the important one btw she is stuck being chu2s music buddy
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thinking about sigourney...
#particularly dwarven gender and relations with human gender#rlly not the same and its like mane..#raised with human gender and made to conform in a certain typa way and DOES see herself as a woman but.#it's.... complicated.#she was extremely repressed#of what. I Dont Know.#i used to think she was a cis woman but thinking about it. bro im not even sure.#certainly created to be woman adjacent and does see herself as such. but#scratching my head. complicated#woman (vague hand moments)#she was very jealous of yves if that means anything. idk#raised to conform into traditional ideas of gender. continued til shr realized well. idc i like my beard lol. but also isolating when she#realizes at some point she still feels like she has to play some part with her identity. she isnt actually sure what she wants.#and yves was like damn lol anyway. while sig kinda like. well something about your acceptance of self makes me deeply upset bc i dont get m#srry for opening that box sig ion even know myself and i WROTE you. still she her n feminine terms tho
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Here’s a bunch of junk for you trans girls to watch
Update: there used to be a link to a mega folder here, but it got taken down.
///TGIRL FEATURE FILMS (alphabetical order)
Adam (2019) it's about a cis boy who's mistaken for a trans boy and rolls with it. Big cast of trans characters including a tgirl played by a tgirl who everyone wants to fuck. Directed by a trans dude. Highly legit. If you're still hung up on pre release speculation based on the novel then you're the most annoying person alive.
Assassination Nation (2018) The first half is Euphoria and the second half is The Purge. ONE OF THE BEST TGIRL MOVIES OF ALL TIME.
Bit (2019) Lesbian girl power vampire movie where the main character is a tgirl played by a tgirl. It's solid. I find it frustrating that they hint at her being trans without explicitly acknowledging it (and she's passing as fuck, so it's easy to not notice), but I know that's what some of y'all want.
Boy Meets Girl (2014) Cis dude for trans girl love story. Pretty normie, but also you see her fully naked (gock out) at the end.
Funeral Parade of Roses (1969) Extremely 60s. Cool as hell.
Lady Daddy (2010) South Korean romcom about a trans girl played by a cis girl who tries unconvincingly to back pass when she finds out she has a kid. Very cute.
Lingua Franca (2019) written directed and starring Isabel Sandoval. An undocumented trans woman immigrant in New York deals with a cis dude partner being a cis dude. Which is also the plot of The Garden Left Behind (2019).
Myra Breckinridge (1970) Raquel Welch is a trans woman and her goal is the destruction of the last vestigial traces of traditional manhood! It's Fight Club! It's Hackers! It's divisive, but it's probably my favorite movie!
So Pretty (2019) Literally the first scripted feature length (non pornographic tho it does have cock) film to feature two trans women played by trans women kissing eachother.
Something Must Break (2014) THE OTHER BEST TGIRL MOVIE OF ALL TIME. Drugs. Crimes. Gock. Slow motion pissing. Slow motion park Fucking. Genuinely the most beautiful sex scene I've seen in any movie. And she makes it to the end still alive and more sure of herself and at peace than ever.
Tangerine (2015) Groundbreaking and also a bunch of the secondary characters are real life pornstars (which I think is neat).
The Garden Left Behind (2019) This and Lingua Franca (2019) really are tgirl twin films, but (like with Antz and A Bug’s Life) the vibes and details make them distinct (I assume tho tbh I’ve never watched Antz).
///TGIRL DOCUMENTARIES
Bambi (2013) about a trans girl showgirl in 50s/60s paris
Paris is Burning (1990) basically it's Pose.
Shinjuku Boys (1995) Trans dudes working in a tokyo club that caters to tboy chasing cis girls. There's at least one trans girl in the mix too.
///FORCED FEMINIZATION
A Reflection of Fear (1972) They raised her as a girl and it made her do murders! It drags in places, but the girl in it is so ethereal and it has ageplay vibes and daddy issues.
Memory Run (1996) A very fun direct to video scifi action flick about fighting fascism by blowing up your pre transition self with a rocket launcher + it's based on a novel written by a trans woman.
She-Man A Story of Fixation (1967) Notable for being such a cliche sissy maid fantasy while also coming out so early + it was Bob Clark's first film lol.
Sleepaway Camp (1983) A more famous version of Reflection of Fear.
Surrender Dorothy (1998) A MUST WATCH. I personally bought a physical DVD and made an ISO of it for you because I was unsatisfied with the quality of the only copy that seemed to exist online. I ALSO PERSONALLY CREATED MY OWN SUBTITLES FOR IT BECAUSE EVEN THE DVD DIDN’T INCLUDE ANY! WHICH TOOK HOURS TO DO!
The Skin I Live In (2011) A rapist is kidnapped and turned into a girl by a mournful vengeful plastic surgeon. Which was also the plot of Victim (2010). I never really vibe with Pedro Almodóvar movies, but I recognize this is the preeminent forced feminization film.
///SHORT FILMS
Gender Troublemakers (1993) Some 90s Toronto trans girls fucking and discoursing. Explicit tgirl on tgirl action. This is the only one on the list that I haven��t actually watched yet. I’m hyped to watch it tho. Seems mindblowingly rad af.
Happy Birthday Marsha (2018) It's about Marsha P. Johnson.
I don't Know (1971) I'm obsessed with the trans girl in this one she just keeps popping up in all kinds of early 70s stuff. Directed by Penelope Spheeris (who is the sister of the cis gf in it).
Mesmeralda (2019) AN ABSOLUTE BANGER HOLY FUCK THE VIBES ARE OFF THE CHARTS! PLS WATCH THIS! I refuse to apologize for it being 15GB. It’s worth every byte.
Pat Rocco's Changes (1970) It's that same girl again!
Queens at Heart (1967) I can't get over that hairdresser girl thinking she's back passing. Most adorably weak boymode ever.
Shangri-La (2021) Another Isabel Sandoval joint.
The Yellow Wallpaper (2021) Freshly post op girl with a supportive boyfriend goes unhinged.
Undress Me (2012) Jana Bringlöv Ekspong did a few short films. Give janabringlove a google after watching this.
///JUST LIKE BTW
Some of these would be tough to find elsewhere, but most of the movies are also watchable on fmovies and/or can be torrented in higher quality.
After you've worked your way through the folder then just start doing Google searches for trans films. Look at IMDB keywords and letterboxd lists. There are so many more out there. These are just like my personal picks.
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