#(but her songs will probably show up a lot tbh i have been in a carly mood lately)

[monstrsball]

happy valentine's day. send me a heart emoji and a ship and i'll assign them a song 🫶

[hoeforsungie]

💌 … ( 𝕻𝖗𝖊𝖛𝖎𝖊𝖜 ) 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 — stoned sex w/ Hannie

best friends to lovers! Hannie x fem reader ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ g ・ smut ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎cw ・ teasing, lots of tension, Hannie and reader are both horny for each other, drug usage (don’t!) wc ・‎ 2.8k ‎| ‎ ‎[library link here]

[ ۫ ꣑ৎ author’s note ] here’s my first ever preview for a work i’m working on! tbh, the fic is loooong and i’m still writing. i decided to post the preview bc the actual fic is kinda sad, depressing, and dark. i’m worried people wouldn’t actually like that part until it gets to the filth, however i wanted to write a hurt/comfort with some smut for a while… and i may or may not have stoner hannie brainrot. i may post just the smut and loving bits as its own thing, as well as the whole fic when i finally finish? idk i’m rambling… well here enjoy this preview for needy stoned Hannie x reader.

oh btw, here’s a playlist w songs i listened to while writing this

divider by @v6que

‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🕊️ ⋅ ˚Jisung was happy to see her smile, even if it was small and her eyes were still red and puffy from crying. A win is a win in his book. So, he happily followed along. The pair grabbed their shoes and the umbrella before leaving the building. The walk to their normal smoking hang out was pretty calm, despite the rain. At least, the rain had died down again into a steady drizzle, saving them from the monsoon-like downpour earlier. The only unfortunate thing was that the wind had picked up, blowing the rain sideways. This left her with no choice but to cling to Jisung as the bitter wind whipped around the two of them. It was about 10 minutes before they spotted the treehouse her parents had built when they were children. All their normal stuff was still there, pictures from their youth hanging on the wall. Now there was an old beat up couch (where their stash was hidden), a bed with a few pillows and blankets where many hours cuddling had been spent, and a projector.

Jisung climbed up first and turned around to offer his hand to y/n. After getting pulled up, she beelined towards the couch to pull out the bud as well as the lighter and the wraps. After wrapping the blunt, she handed it to Jisung as he flopped down onto the couch next to her. “Ladies first.” She giggled. He took the blunt with a begrudging look and held it in his mouth, waiting for her to light it. Y/n obliged and elbowed him “Don’t take all of it, make sure to leave some for me. You hog.” She elbowed her friend then rubbed at her eyes, probably trying to diffuse some of the puffiness remaining from her tears.

Jisung, of course, only offered her a punch to the arm instead and a snarky remark about how he ‘wasn’t the one who finished 70% of the last blunt.’ Y/n rolled her eyes and plucked the blunt from Jisung’s lips harshly. “Shut up, besides,” y/n says as she pauses to take a drag. “You said this was to smoke the depression away. Right now I think I need it more than you.” She stuck her tongue at Jisung, to which he replied by flicking her in the forehead. Y/n took another big drag and coughed. “Goddamn, it’s been a while since I smoked with you Jisungie.” After coughing for a bit, y/n tucked her legs under her and turned towards Jisung. She took a few more drags before putting it in between her two fingers and passing it to Jisung to take. He gladly took the blunt and took a large drag himself. Somehow, he didn’t cough like her, much to y/n’s dismay.

“Bro, are you fucking kidding me? You’re such a show off. Ugh, fuck you!” Y/n squeaked and started punching him anywhere she could hit. “You’re the worst.” She sighed and plopped her body forward so she could lean onto Jisung. Cuddling between them wasn’t something new by any means. She’d never admit it, but cuddling with Jisung recently has been giving her new thoughts to think about. She didn’t know when it happened, but one day she began to notice the way her heart beats louder when she feel jisung’s broad chest caging her in, as his arms wrapped around her. She’d especially take this one to the grave, but she really started noticing it as she slipped away to excuse herself to use the bathroom in a panic. It was pretty obvious when she slipped her underwear down to see the pearly string that attaches itself to her lips and her panties. It was slowly becoming clear to her that she was attracted to Jisung. Perhaps, in more ways than one.

Jisung chuckled at y/n’s cute little outburst and reached over to tuck a piece of her hair behind her ear. “Looked like it was getting in your lip gloss, y/nnie.” He said with a honey-dripped voice. He smiled as he noticed as a small blush crept along y/n’s cheeks, down towards her neck. His eyes trailed below as they followed the path the blush was burning on her skin. He swallowed thickly as his eyes reached below her collarbone where his white band t-shirt stuck to her skin snugly. The white had become similar to gossamer, her skin and black bra shining through, thanks to the rain. Taking a sharp inhale, Jisung unconsciously began digging into her arm tightly as he drank in the sight. As if on cue, he broke the spell and suddenly snapped his eyes back into y/n’s. He hoped that she hadn’t noticed, although he knew the chances were entirely too slim. He couldn’t even blink as he peered into y/n’s eyes. Now it was Jisung’s turn to blush, a warmth spreading across his own cheeks. He sputtered something about ‘needing space’ and ‘why are you over here when there’s the entire couch?’ then promptly shoved y/n across the couch, turning his head away from her to hide the blush that was igniting his skin.

Y/n, of course, wouldn’t stand for being pushed away from her heat source as the cold from the rain blew into the tree house. “Sungie, fuck off! What the hell was that for? You know it’s cold out.” She pouted and crossed her arms over her chest. After a few seconds of pouting silently she reached her arm out to grab the blunt that Jisung was holding in his hand, half forgotten. He yelped in surprise and moved his arm up in the air out of y/n’s reach. She slapped his shoulder and laughed as he grunted. After a few seconds of pretending to give up, she smiled and lunged even harder at Jisung. Launching herself off the couch and smiling in victory as she was able to reach the blunt Jisung held over his head, she failed to notice her miscalculation as she was now sitting in Jisung’s lap with her face very close to his own. He glared at her unamused but she still noticed the blush dusting his cheeks. The clock on the wall continued to tick on as the air around the pair thickened. Jisung’s own shocked expression melted into something much needier as she felt him try to physically run away from her hold. But with her sitting on his lap, he had nowhere to go. He pinched his eyebrows and turned his head, bringing his fist up in a feeble attempt to hide his teeth digging into his bottom lip at the suggestive pose the pair are in. With the way in which her arm is still frozen in the air at her attempt to get the blunt for herself, she begins to blush as bright as Jisung and feel a familiar slowly knot tying itself in her stomach. Y/n never thought she’d get turned on by such a small act, let alone from a simple mistake she made.

More time passed as the pair stared deeply, albeit curiously, into each other’s eyes. Jisung’s hands which were thrown around her waist in shock began to grip tighter at her hips, the fingers leaving indents in the milky skin where they were also splayed on her thighs. She parted her lips and he heard a small, breathy “Oh.” leave her. It was hard to deny, but this had a larger impact on y/n than she would have liked. She inhaled sharply as she felt her clit throb gently at the feeling at Jisung’s hands deliciously digging into her sides. It was her turn to look away in embarrassment as she quickly dismounted herself off his lap and back onto the couch with a pout. Stupid Jisung and the way he doesn’t realize the impact he has on me! She internally curses him as all she places the blunt back in between her sticky strawberry lips and inhales. After taking a long drag, and much to her enjoyment, the lack of a coughing fit, she crosses her hands back over into her lap and closes her eyes. She felt the beginning of her arousal begin to fade as she tried to be one of God’s stronger soldiers and put the thoughts flashing behind her eyes deep down into her subconscious. Something about the way Jisung’s fingers stung ever so slightly as he pushed into her plush thighs and waist with his soft hands threw her for a complete tailspin. Of course she’s had sex before, but never had she felt so ignited by such a small and subtle touch. It was as if a jolt of electricity had gone through her the second he laid his hands on her. Shaking her head vigorously to rid the sinful thoughts before they overwhelmed her and she could only imagine the way in which he would handle her, she tried to rid the unholy thoughts once more. Deciding to say “fuck it” and take another large drag from the blunt, end goal of becoming as high as possible in the fastest manner becoming clearer and clearer in her head. It was during this time in which she was so in her own head, she missed the golden opportunity to peek open her own eyes and see the disheveled state Jisung was in, similarly to her own.

If she were to peer over and turn her head towards Jisung, she would have had a heart attack and simultaneously seen the way he desired y/n so bad it was almost tangible. His head was reeling and chest heaving as he shut his eyes and flopped it back against the couch, staring up into the ceiling. His hair flopped with him and covered his eyes, but his own arousal was still apparent to any outsider. The way in which his bottom lip is still trapped between his teeth as he tries to catch his breath. The blush on his cheeks spread down to his chest where the slight dew of sweat began to gather. He pinched his nose bridge as he tried to will the thoughts and his raging boner away. The way in which y/n’s body looked so small on his lap, the way in which her thighs were so soft and plump in his hands. Her small, breathy, ‘oh’ that made his heart hang onto the idea that she was into him enough to find him sexually attractive, and the way in which her wet clothes clung to her form; it all made him go insane. He needed the weed to kick in any second now, hoping he could instead get lost in the sensation of being high rather than hopelessly longing for the feeling of y/n’s pink sugary lips gliding against his own. Heaving a heavy sigh, he looked over to y/n on the couch and slowly peeked his eyes at her form on the couch. Thanking whatever deity was allowing her to look so perfect before him, and luckily she was in her own world with her eyes closed. He let his eyes slowly drag down her body, a little more unashamedly now that he knew he didn’t have an audience to judge his own indulgence.

Jisung flitted his eyes down to her chest once again, running them along the valley of her collarbones, down to where her cleavage just faintly peeked out above the low collar she cut on his shirt, now claimed for herself and neatly stored in Jisung’s drawer for their impromptu sleepovers and other clothing emergencies. He dragged his eyes back up to her lips. He internally groaned as he saw the way her gloss smudged slightly from the blunt, the sugary pink tint shimmering softly in the light. After admiring her lips for a while, Jisung trailed his eyes down to her hips and smiled softly at what he saw. The grey sweatpants that they both owned as a matching set were sitting snugly on her hips. The ones with a little black star and the word “Youtiful” under it, that both of them got as a gift on graduation day from one of their closest friends. The ones that matched his very own. Thanking God and the people he saved in his last life, he smiled at the fact that even if y/n had so many other bottoms to choose from, she chose those special ones. Now here they were, both matching. As he thanked the universe for giving him this win, he stilled as he saw y/n inhale and slowly open her eyes before yawning and sitting up, lashes getting slightly wet from the unshed tears the strong yawn brought to her eyes. He sat up straighter, eyes still trained on her as he followed her every move. Imagine his surprise as he feels y/n shove the blunt between his lips and her hand on his cheeks, pushing into them lightly as she forces his mouth open (much like the kissy face a fish makes) to take the blunt. After she’s satisfied that the blunt remains lodged in Jisung’s plush lips, she withdraws her hand and whips her head away. He held his breath when the words y/n whispered met his ears.

“Mm feelin’ it slowly. It’s your turn to catch up now. Don’t wanna be high alone, Hannie.” Y/n mumbled out through pouted lips. She felt her cheeks heat up as she admitted to already feeling the pleasant sluggish feeling enveloping her body. After she was satisfied by seeing Jisung take a few drags himself, head laid back with one hand in his hair behind his head as he peered up at the ceiling, she let her own head flop back on the couch. Sighing with contentment, she snuggled further into the couch, allowing the comforting feeling of her incoming high roll onto her slowly. It was a few minutes that had passed before y/n’s eyes blink open again slowly as she sat up quickly realizing she had dozed off for about 30 minutes.

Embarrassment painted her features as she quickly realized where Jisung had been when she dozed off. She looked down and nearly yelped as she saw Jisung with his plump lips, open and spit-slicked, laying in her lap. She felt his hair tickle her thighs through the material of the sweatpants as she sucked in a breath and shook him gently, worried what would happen if he stayed there any longer. Now it was her turn to bite her lip as she felt him stir ever so slightly, and instead of waking up, he then wiggled his face deeper into y/n’s lap, grabbing at her and mumbling something incoherent except for the one word she caught. ‘Warm.’ Jisung burrowed in again, his nose nuzzling along her thigh as he breathed out peacefully, his breath fanning across her tummy, where her shirt had risen in her short slumber. Y/n’s breath caught as she let out a little hiccup when one deep sigh let out just the right amount of air to feel a small bead of arousal leak out of her hole and into her panties. After freezing in fear when she felt Jisung nuzzle impossibly deeper, almost driven in his sleep by his body’s unconscious drive to feel her closer. It was over for her though when she felt the tip of his nose nuzzle in just right so that it barely traced over her clothed clit. With a squeak she felt her clit throb more strongly this time and the arousal continued to pool in both her underwear and belly before she’d decided she’d had enough. She grabbed Jisung by the hair and lifted his sleeping body up.

Jisung awoke with a start and a yelp as his hands reached up to where y/n’s were caught tangled in his brunette locks. His bracelet jangled as he looked up at y/n with unshed tears and a pout on his lips, making them look so kissable. After a few seconds y/n smoothed her hand back over his hair and massaged it. She let her hands begin to knead into Jisung’s neck, trying to work out any sore spots as an apology for waking him up so urgently. With the pout still on his lips, he peered up at y/n as he felt his body begin to melt into her touch. “Why did you even do that anyways?” She shook her head and did something which Jisung did not expect at all. She leaned down and pressed her glossy lips to the tip of his nose gently. As his brain was short circuiting he looked up at her with his big boba eyes shining in the soft light and another pout formed on his lips. “W-what was that for?” He asked, his eyes trailing away to look at the posters and photos on the wall, a testament to the brilliance of your youth that you two shared together. Y/n simply smiled and retracted her face from Jisung’s. She twinkled out a laugh, eyes turning into little crescents, and flicked him in the forehead.

[mitskicodedwukong]

✨ REDSON, SIX-EARED MACAQUE, & SUN WUKONG WITH AN ADHD S/O ✨

» three-thirty (AJR) « 0:45 ─〇───── 4:07

╔⏤⏤⏤⏤╝🍑╚⏤⏤⏤⏤╗ AUTHOR'S NOTE ╚⏤⏤⏤⏤╗🍑╔⏤⏤⏤╝ ➤ This is reposted from my old account, @nothyenlowz :3 ➤ These are headcanons. ➤ This is romantic. ➤ Reader is afab & uses she/her! ➤ I don't think I went as in depth as I could have been I still hope it's accurate and you enjoy it! ➤ TRIGGER WARNINGS include profanity, a little bit of angst, and minor violence. ➤ Word count: 1,361

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

❝ You wanna skip it if it's wordy, but fit the whole song in three-thirty .❞

╔⏤⏤⏤⏤╝╚⏤⏤⏤⏤╗ REDSON 🔥 ╚⏤⏤⏤⏤╗╔⏤⏤⏤⏤╝

➤ before he finds out you have ADHD, i imagine he's confused by your behavior at best and frustrated by it at worst.

➤ your daydreaming and procrastination can be annoying for him, someone who's always about work, work, work. when you're talking to him about your fixations, he gets irritated because either he 1.) has no idea what you're talking about or 2.) thinks you're making fun of him since he often rambles about his inventions in a similar manner.

➤ he just doesn't understand why you're doing those things and neither do you. it causes a lot of struggles for you both initially, leading to shit communication and hurt feelings.

➤ when you're finally diagnosed, redson listens very closely. now your quirks are starting to make sense, but you still don't have as much information as he'd like. he researches ADHD in AFAB people rather meticulously on his own time (sometimes interrupted by his own anger at the lacking information for females), and by the end of it, he has a much improved understanding.

➤ and boy does he feel shitty. hindsight is 20/20 or something.

➤ the idea that he blew up at you for things out of your control makes him feel ashamed, especially when some of those things (like info-dumping) are signs of affection. so you don't see him for a while, partially due to some unhealthy self-punishment on his end, and also because he's trying to come up with a solution—that being a way to make it up to you, of course, not "fix" you.

➤ when redson stops avoiding you, he takes you out on a date with all your favorite activities and thoroughly apologizes to you. he promises to adjust his behavior to accommodate and support you.

➤ (which might have made you cry, considering you've always been treated like you're the problem.)

➤ true to his word, redson changes a lot. he leaves little notes for you as reminders, sets alarms for you, helps you finish or do tasks you don't have the energy for, etc. he even starts prompting info-dumping, reading up on the source material so he can ask questions.

➤ he also does his very best to educate himself on masking and burnout so he can a.) keep you from going there or b.) recognize the signs when you are there and help you. i like to imagine he made a sensory room for you that has all your favorite things and you can just go there to chill and unwind.

➤ he's also super protective over you. if people make fun of your stims, say you talk a lot, undermine your sensory issues, etc., he will DESTROY them. no way in hell is he letting you be disrespected like that. verbal smackdown, here we come.

➤ ultimately, it's a learning process. but it's one he's more than willing to thoroughly explore for you.

╔⏤⏤⏤⏤⏤╝╚⏤⏤⏤⏤⏤╗ SIX-EARED MACAQUE 🔮 ╚⏤⏤⏤⏤⏤╗╔⏤⏤⏤⏤⏤╝

➤ HONESTLY i headcanon macaque as autistic, so i feel like he had a feeling that you were ADHD before you did.

➤ probably made jokes like "it's the ADHD lol" for certain behaviors until you decided to do some research on it and were like "🧍‍♂️ yeah so—"

➤ not surprised at all when you're diagnosed, obviously. he uses the opportunity to show you coping mechanisms he's learned (though some have to be tweaked for your needs since autism isn't ADHD), and even begins to unmask more around you (which was inevitable anyway tbh, but it's easier now that he doesn't feel so different from you).

➤ since macaque thrives under routine/structure, he often handles reminders. he also keeps you on track, verbally and physically, if you have things to do. ALSO is super on you about eating, since he likes cooking.

➤ macaque's experienced dozens of burnouts in his long life, so he knows how awful they are. he can sniff out a burnout a mile away so i'd like to think that you don't experience many while with him because he's really good at pacing the both of you/being aware of your emotional and mental state. the dojo's pretty chill like 90% of the time due to his own sensory issues so it's a good place to unwind and relax.

➤ you guys have picked up so many phrases from each other. he'll be working on a script for a shadow play while you're cleaning and he'll just hear you laugh and go, "wow, didn't see that one comin'." it definitely flusters him that he's included in your echolalia.

➤ macaque rambles to you about theatrical pieces from various cultures. if you introduce him to new ones, tell him something he doesn't know about a piece he's already familiar with, etc. he'll kiss you istg. anyway this is to say the feeling is mutual and he probably ends up getting into some of the media/hobbies you tell him about!

➤ you guys mutually bully each other lmao. you'll be trying to do some work, get to talking to him about whatever comes to you, and then suddenly it's three hours later. you're like "FUCK" and he just laughs at you (you get him back, of course, and it's all in good fun).

➤ he barely thinks beating anyone who talks shit about you is an overreaction, but if you don't like it then you'll just have a clone stick around in your shadow or something to scare the shit out of anyone who decides to open their mouth to you.

➤ in summary, macaque is very helpful and teaches you coping skills when it comes to sensory issues + overload.

╔⏤⏤⏤⏤╝❀╚⏤⏤⏤⏤╗ SUN WUKONG 🍑 ╚⏤⏤⏤⏤╗❀╔⏤⏤⏤⏤╝

➤ first off, i headcanon Wukong as ADHD, too.

➤ with that said, i feel like Wukong just... assumed you knew you were ADHD and rolled with it.

➤ like you guys constantly quoted/repeated each other/shows and stimmed at/with each other. you'd get in loops. you'd adapt each other's phrases/stims. neurotypicals don't do that.

➤ it's genuinely amusing thinking about you two just repeating the same things at each other. it's such a serotonin boost and it makes you both laugh. same for when you stim together, especially hand-flapping and jumping up and down.

➤ you're both trash at remembering stuff but fortunately you seem to have an awful lot of capacity for the other—meaning you remind wukong he has a session with MK today because he forgot, and he reminds you that you agreed to make noodles with pigsy today because you forgot.

➤ i don't think remembering to eat or drink is a big problem for you, since wukong is a big comfort eater and shares his snacks with you so you kinda just... roll with it lol.

➤ wukong has a bunch of homemade stim tools. once he sees that you're interested, he makes some more for you. even after your diagnosis, you don't try "professionally" made stim toys—you just don't need them when wukong's work so well.

➤ you guys spend hours talking about your interests, ping-ponging off each other. like: "OH, did you know x?" "NO, but did you hear about x?" x1000.

➤ you guys also bully each other. "Hey Great Sage you forgot do the dishes again, you crusty bitch"; "says the dumbass who started folding laundry and then did a fashion show with the monkeys".

➤ like macaque, wukong's had his fair share of burnouts. unfortunately, he's not super good at preventing them or even realizing he's in them until it's been a few months, but you guys take care of each other if the other is struggling. you're also very aware of the other's limits so if one of you is pushing it, you can help each other step back.

➤ wukong learned a great deal of patience and mercy from his journey, so people being unkind to him doesn't really bother him. plus, he barely leaves his mountain as is—but if one of those times, someone doesn't to be a dick while you're stimming or something? best case scenario, he has some very choice words—worst case scenario, bro's taking it upon himself to remind the public why you should be more considerate of who you're snarking to.

➤ basically, nothing changes after you get diagnosed lol. you and wukong are very happy ADHD gremlins who are celebrating your neurodivergency :)

❝ I thought I had the ADHD, but that's a real thing (and I'm just lazy) .❞

[hkthatgffan]

Hey! You seem like a huge *Gravity Falls* fan, so I was hoping you could answer some of my biggest questions about morality in the show. Since the release of *The Book of Bill* (which I’ve read), do you think Bill could ever be redeemed or seen sympathetically? Is there a possibility for him to get better and maybe even have a happy ending?

I ask this because I see a lot of fans saying, "He's awful," or "He deserves everything coming to him a thousandfold," and "Don't sympathize with him!" But then I watch the show, and I see characters like Gideon Gleeful and Robbie who were also problematic—they did terrible things but still got happy endings.

I know Gideon went to jail, but he broke out and ultimately had a positive resolution. Robbie, for example, tried to brainwash Wendy into a romantic relationship (which is super messed up!). Even though it didn’t work, and Wendy only dated him because she thought he wrote her that song, Robbie knew what the CD was supposed to do. But instead of facing real consequences, he just went through a breakup and still ended up with a happy ending, with friends and a new girlfriend.

As for Gideon, he tried to kill Dipper, manipulate Mabel, and invade the entire town’s privacy—basically doing some of the same things Bill did. Yet, after going to jail and making a last-minute turn toward good, he still got a happy ending.

So I’m super confused. What should I be feeling? Is there a correct way to view these characters? What do you think?

Bill at his core is the personification of denial. We see in the book that the harbours some regret and hatred for what he's done to the people around him but he refuses to try and take it to heart and use it as a point to grow from. I mean, look at what he did.

He killed his entire dimension and family and yet tries to deny it was anything bad and that in fact he liberated them. He manipulated and almost destroyed Ford and yet denies ruining the friendship they had. He tried to kill Dipper and Mabel and yet acts like it was nothing. Bill is unsympathetic. He's a narcissistic sociopath who doesn't wanna admit it.

The difference with Robbie and Gideon is that they changed and grew past their issues. Robbie tbh was more so being a literal teen drama story while Gideon was made that way through his exposure to Journal 2 and how that corrupted him. Once both found a new lease on life, they were able to grow and become better.

Bill is not that. He cannot accept that he's not fine and that he's the sole survivor of his kind and has pushed everyone he knew out of his life through his own actions. We've all probably dealt with people like Bill Cipher. Be it a person, co-worker, significant other, friend, family member, etc. We've all had that person who acts full of themselves and manipulatively but in reality is suffering. But because of how they act and their refusal to do anything, you start to lose any sympathy or interest in helping or being there and just let them go. Congrats...you just escaped a toxic relationship.

As someone who has dealt with Bill Ciphers in my life like many of us probably have, it's easy to feel sympathy for him. Bill make his case out as such that you wanna feel like he deserves better. But he's a trillion year old being that has been doing the same thing over and over again and refuses to make an effort to move on and let himself accept what he did to his dimension and to people around him like Ford.

Ford on the other hand realized that and cut Bill out of his life. He's doing better now because of that and has his family by his side. Ford is an example of how to move on from such toxic situations and people and find happiness in your life again after that. Bill is the example of what happens if you can't.

Life is short. We all will die one day. We all deserve to lead a life free of people like Bill Cipher in it. The best thing we can do is follow Ford and find the people in life that make us happy and let go of Bill.

So, to answer your question, NO!

I don't think Bill Cipher can be redeemed or seen in a sympathetic way. He tried to. But he's shown even in the Theraprism that he can't. He's doomed to live forever with the shit he's done. And it's his own fault.

Bill can say he's fine but in the end...he's not. And he never will be. There is no redemption for Bill Cipher.

[illubean]

Valorant Protocol as Highschool Stereotypes

Characters: Chamber, Gekko, Iso, Jett, Killjoy, Neon, Phoenix, Raze, Sage, Skye, Viper, Yoru Type: Headcanons

HAHA help me valorant brainrot >.< also this is based off of my hs experience soooo yeah

Warnings: none

Chamber

your typical pretty boy

all the girls love him all the boys hate him

well...most of the girls love him

they follow him around to classes or offer him gifts or ask to sit with him at lunch etc.

and he eats up the attention every time

he's lab partners with Viper in Environmental Sciences and he likes trying to flirt with her

she actually hates him btw

Gekko

canonically he skateboards

but honestly? I can see him being on the dance team

he's so high energy, he needs some sort of outlet

he never misses an opportunity to show off his dance moves

homecoming? prom? he is the center of the dance circle

like Raze, he doesn't know how popular he is

he's just happy to have so many good friends that it doesn't even actually occur to him that he's considered "popular"

Iso

he's an ap art kid

like he walks around with a big ass sketchbook every day

always talking about his portfolio

Iso baby ily but please shut the fuck up about oil paints <3

he probably volunteered part of his summer break to come in and paint a mural for the school

I think he'd also take a piano class as like a schedule filler but he actually gets crazy good at it

Jett

pe tryhard

if you end up on the opposite team as her while playing dodge ball good luck 😓

she's always picked as team captain because literally no one else is excited as she is

she's sorta like Hairo from Saiki K 💀

she gets a lil mad when her teammates don't try

Killjoy

she's in robotics club

she's not very popular but that doesn't bother her at all

she heads straight to and from every class and spends her lunch period in the workshop unless Raze drags her off somewhere

not a lot of people actually know who she is, and if they do they just know her as 'Raze's Friend'

i think she'd remind the teacher about the homework and hit you with the "erm actually 🤓" tbh

Neon

she's on track and field/cross country

after every meet you can find her laying on the floor somewhere ready to puke bc she tries so hard to win 😭

she always ends up top 5 tho

she complains about practice but joins the team every year anyways

she carries her bag around all the time and if you open it there's like 10 water bottles in there

#hydratedqueen

Phoenix

theater kid DUHH

he's probably drama club president or sumn

bro will NOT let go of a specific song from a musical he was in his freshman year and it wasn't even his song 💀

he's been in every show every year and somehow he manages to land every role he wants

he's insanely good at the game 'bang' (mostly because he's louder than everyone else...)

he probably plans/hosts the cast parties too

Raze

she doesn't care much about her grades

she does the bare minimum and gets straight Cs

she's just here to have fun

everyone likes her because of her approachable personality

she doesn't think she's popular but she is

Sage

she's in the medical assistant class

she takes it very seriously, as she plans on going to medical school

even before taking the class she carries a first aid kit and other essentials everywhere she goes

you need a bandaid? ibuprofen? a pad or tampon? she has it all

she's also ASB president

school events literally would not be able to run without her

lets just say her college applications/resume will look REALLY good...

Skye

she also took medical assistant but was less crazy about it than Sage

she just follows her friend's lead

she thinks the skills are useful but she doesn't see herself making it her career

but also I think she would play volleyball

she's a well rounded player but specializes most in defense

still, don't underestimate her bc this girl can SPIKE

Viper

she took every ap science class offered without taking the general ones first

she complains about getting any grade below an A...

"What are you talking about? That test was easy"

sorry not everyone is as smart as you Sabine 😑

she spends all her free time at chem tutoring (even though she doesn't need it)

Yoru

he thinks he looks cool and mysterious when he walks down the halls but he doesn't

everyone just thinks his mad all the time and stay out of his way 😭

randos try to pick fights with him bc he "looked at them wrong" (Yoru wins every time)

he's not exactly a 'quiet kid' but he does lay low when it comes to the social part of school

despite his 'bad boy' look, he has pretty good grades

he's also probably one of those guys that a handful of girls have a crush on but he has no idea

[dangerouslyknown]

Hi! Please do headcanons for gojo like you did Higuruma x

Satoru Gojo Headcanons 💎

A/N: Thanks for the request! My JJK obsession is hitting like a truck. I hope I delivered these Gojo headcanons well, mwah

Contents/Warnings: General headcanons, relationship headcanons both SFW & NSFW. Reader/partner is referred as "his S/O" or by they/them so gn!reader

General Headcanons

He used to play Moviestarplanet. He was sooo popular too. He had lots of friends and he made the silliest movies/artbooks which people loved

He likes to sing and usually he sings whatever is stuck in his head on random occasions, without really trying to sound good

...but oh boy if you ever get the chance to do actual karaoke with him... He sings beautifully when he puts the effort in. What a gorgeous voice, it almost surprises everyone

He goes crazy about Lady Gaga's songs and he loves to do silly little performances whenever he hears any of her songs

Gojo is also a Swiftie???

Somehow I feel like he is TERRIBLE when it comes to spending money. He hasn't had a day in his life where he had to worry about financial stuff, so...

He's the type of guy buy an expensive ice cream machine, then accidentally break it and buy a new one like it's nothing

He used to troll people online as a teen...

Actually, he probably still does it for the heck of it. He isn't one to do anything super offensive, but he enjoys messing with people

SFW Relationship headcanons

He hasn´t been in many relationships in his life, mostly because he rarely lets anyone close. Bro has trust issues :(

He dislikes being vulnerable in front of others, but his S/O is who he shows his true self. It is not something to take lightly

He KNOWS he is attractive and it flatters his ego when he is complimented on it, but if one wants to win his heart, you need to go deeper than that. He wants a person who truly appreciates him beyond looks

His love language is gift giving. He will gift his S/O anything they desire, and it´s his way of showing he cares. He gets excited like a kid in a candy store when he brings his S/O something and waits for them to open the gift

Most of the time it doesn't even have to be anything expensive. Of course he likes to spoil his S/O, but sometimes he just sees something small, which reminds him of them and he decides to buy it

Then, his unofficial love language is being annoying. He would ask "would you still love me if I was a worm" and whatnot

Related to that, he would act all smug and probably provoke arguments with his S/O just to entertain himself (but he's not malicious about it of course!)

When he sees something romantic, he would say "Ewww, sappy romance stuff" and then do exactly those things in private

He likes to show off with his relationship? Y'know, like posting about it in social media and PDA

This also ties to when he holds great pride in the thought that he's able to protect them no matter what. Maybe he's also a bit jealous and likes to show others that his S/O truly is his, and only his

Looooves to dress in matching clothing with his S/O!

Also, if he'd play online games with his S/O, he'd definitely want to do matching usernames (Sometimes it'd be cringe, but that's a part of why he loves doing it)

(NSFW under the cut)

NSFW Relationship headcanons

Leans towards being more kinky tbh

This man likes to have fun, okay? He is super adventurous in the bedroom. He's always coming up with new ideas for his S/O and him to try, and he usually is the one to initiate

He'd love to bring in ropes, blindfolds, toys of all kind and everything you could think of. He wants to use them on his S/O, but isn't against the idea being toys or ropes used on him either blindfolds wouldn't even work on him though

He´s a fan of playing with the dynamics. The vibes he gives is 50% pillow princess and 50% daddy, so there's never a dull moment when he switches up things with his S/O

He lives for teasing in the bedroom. You are not going to get anything easily from his arrogant ass: If he's a sub, he's going to be a brat. If he's a top, you need to beg him

He is capable of being serious during intimate time, but most of the time there's going to be funny and goofy moments

I could 100% see him doing something like slapping his dick against his S/O's face, then grin. At the same time it's hot but it's also hilarious (in his opinion)

Speaking of his cock, I think it's bigger than average. Length is impressive, then girth is more average-ish

Definitely very vocal during sex. He will not shut up whether it's whimpers or dirty talk

I think he loves to fuck his S/O from behind. He loves to kiss the back of their neck, their shoulders and all over their back while going at it

[evanpeterswhoresblog]

Linger

Sirius Black x rockstar! f!reader

warnings: smut, p in v, rough sex, like pretty rough guys he bites you till you bleed, underage drinking, underage smoking, a lot of smoking tbh, drunkish sex, kinda has a plot so yeah lmk if i missed anything

summary: you and your band mates decide to go out to a pub, where you end up meeting the most handsome boy you’ve ever seen.

word count: 4.2k

a/n: guys i’m so bad at these summaries holy. this is probably my favorite fic i’ve written. the flirting and the tension like omg. trust me. also, let’s pretend The Runaways are british and let’s pretend everything id accurate hahaha. enjoy ;)

~~~

“Do you think we’ll be recognized tonight?”

You turn to your bandmate, Joan, and shrug. “It’s fifty-fifty.”

“What pub are we going to again?” She asks.

“The one where they let underage people in, of course, you’re still the only one who’s twenty-one in the band you know,” you reply.

The other two members of your band, Sandy and Lita, are ahead of you, engulfed in their own conversation. You slide your hands into the pockets of your jacket and try to keep up. You’ve been in the band for a few months as the new lead singer. Their old one left to start her own band, claiming it to be more successful. Yet your band is the one that’s gotten sold-out shows, interviews on television, and pictures in magazines. Sometimes you like to think it was fate that she left, and you just so happened to be in town the night they were holding auditions. The fans surely enjoy your voice more, they make you out to be the leader even though you’re only seventeen and the newest member. You don’t mind though, and neither do your bandmates.

It’s almost ten when you arrive at the pub and thankfully no one has recognized you yet, or they have and simply haven’t said anything. There’s no one at the door to check IDs just like Sandy had said. The four of you enter fast and find a table. The music is loud, the lights are low, and people are dancing all over. You like it, a lot.

“Drinks?” Lita questions a few seconds after you sit.

“You know it!” Joan replies.

“I’ll be right back then.”

Sandy takes out a pack of cigarettes. “Care for one?”

“Obviously,” you answer, holding your hand out. She hands you one, you’re quick to light it and stick it between your lips, inhaling a deep breath of smoke. “How come the police haven’t found this place?”

Joan rolls her eyes. “They have.”

“And? Why don’t they shut it down?”

“They have people who come here, of course, sons, daughters, you know that sort of thing. It may be illegal but it’s trustworthy,” she explains. “Why do you care anyway?”

You shrug. “Just curious I suppose.”

Lita arrives back at the table, four glasses held in her arms. You take yours fast, eager to taste whatever liquor she got for you. It’s bitter, with a hint of sweetness in it. Based on the color as well, your guess is some sort of vodka mix. You drink it despite the awful aftertaste it leaves in your mouth. The cigarette between your fingers helps a bit. The four of you talk for a while and enjoy the peace of having no fans around.

“You should go to the bar y/n,” Lita says after some time. “Or well it might be too late now, but when I was there, I saw a boy your age, remarkably handsome.”

Sandy laughs. “You’re trying to send her home with someone already?”

Lita nudges the other girl with her shoulder. “No, I’m only trying to get some new song material.”

“We’ll see if there’s any potential,” you say, taking the last sip of your drink and getting up. You brush down your hair. “Do I look alright?”

“You’re always beautiful,” Joan answers, letting out a cloud of smoke.

“Wish me luck.” You chuckle before heading to the bar.

With every step you take, you feel eyes on you. Most belong to older men who shouldn’t even be paying you any mind. You’re used to the feeling of being watched, with all the fans and paparazzi that corner you before and after gigs. So, you move through the pub without a second thought about it.

In the back of your head, you curse yourself for not asking Lita what the guy looks like. For a moment you question how you’re supposed to find him, but then your curious eyes find one guy who stands out. He’s leaning on the wall, a glass in his hand and a cigarette between his lips. Based on his face, you figure he can’t be more than nineteen. And oh, how right Lita was. His hair is dark and long, almost reaching his shoulders. He’s dressed in a simple white tee shirt and baggy jeans. Despite the distance, you swear you can make out a sliver of a tattoo on his shoulder. He’s gorgeous, almost too gorgeous.

You approach him carefully, thinking of different opening lines in your head. Would it be wrong to use your fame to get him to take you home? Probably. But you’ve seen Joan do it plenty of times. She always says it’s simply a tool and that you should use it to your advantage. You’ve never done it though. Perhaps it’s your little amount of consciousness that remains that tells you it’s wrong. You don’t know and the alcohol in your system doesn’t help. So, when you reach him, you say the first thing that comes to mind.

“Hi.”

He looks at you, the cigarette dangling between his lips. “Hello.”

“How old are you?” You ask, immediately feeling stupid for such a question.

“What are you a cop?” He chuckles.

You feel your cheeks heat up. “No uh... sorry.”

“It’s fine love, just not a very good pick-up line,” he replies. He takes his cigarette out, his eyes locked on yours. “Especially since you look like you’re sixteen.”

“Seventeen actually.” You correct him.

“Ah, well there’s something we share then.”

Something about the way he’s looking at you comforts you. There’s no recognition in his eyes at all. You can tell. To him, you are just another girl. Not the lead singer of The Runaways. Just a simple girl.

“You can try again if you’d like,” he says. You look at him, confused. “Try another pick-up line.”

You gently smile and think for a few seconds. Nothing better comes to mind.

“Come here often?”

He laughs. “Somehow I think that was worse than the first one.”

“Sorry. Usually, I’m better at this sort of thing,” you reply. You put your hands back in your pockets, suddenly feeling very hot with embarrassment.

“Don’t be sorry, it’s cute.”

There’s a moment of silence. He takes a sip of his drink; you stare at his hand. The way it looks wrapped around the glass makes your stomach fill with butterflies. You hate how much you want him to take you home. You don’t even know his name. But he’s handsome, so much so it makes you unable to think straight. You need to know more.

“Are you from around here?”

He nods. “Born and raised in London. You?”

For a split second you wonder, if he’s from London how come he doesn’t know who you are? Sure, your band isn’t on the same level of success as Queen or ACDC but you’re also not underground. You push the thought away.

“Originally from Westchester but now I’m here in London for... work,” you answer.

“Work? I thought you were seventeen.”

“Yes but, eighteen next month. I already finished school.”

He takes another drag of his cigarette. “Wish I could say the same, I still have another year left. Though, I rather enjoy school, gets me away from my dear parents.”

“Oh, where do you go?”

You notice the way he shifts his posture. “Out of the country, you wouldn’t know of it.”

“Like a boarding school?”

“I suppose you could say that.”

You look around the pub, a slight feeling of awkwardness blooming within you. You don’t know why you’re so nervous. You’ve done this before. You decide to blame it on the cheap vodka because really, you’re better than this.

“So, what’s your name then?” You ask after a few more minutes.

“Does it really matter?” He replies, catching you a bit off guard. He flicks the ash off his cigarette, his dark eyes on yours. “All of it’s the same.”

“I don’t know what you’re referring to,” you say, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Don’t play dumb love, I know this isn’t your first time. I’m sure you’ve chatted up many other lads and had them take you home.” There’s something about the tone in which he speaks that has your knees almost wobble.

“Why would you think that?”

He sighs, leaning over to a small table discards his cigarette in an ashtray, and leaves his glass. When he leans back on the wall, now with both of his hands-free, he buries them in the pockets of his baggy jeans. He looks down at you with an expression that could send your morals far out of mind. You want him, terribly. And you think he knows this.

“Besides the fact that you said you’re usually better at this, you’re also possibly the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,” he eventually answers.

You can’t help but roll your eyes. “I highly doubt that, but nevertheless thanks for the compliment.”

“I mean it. Most girls I see still wear those long skirts and sweaters, but you, you’re dressed like you could pass as a rock star.”

Your face heats up once again. You know he’s right. With your leather jacket, flared jeans, high-heeled boots, and small tight top you know it’s clear what kind of person you are. Your makeup only adds to it, black smudged eyeliner and glitter on your eyes. It’s a toned-down version of what you wear on stage. He doesn’t need to know that though.

You give him a smile and shrug. “Rock is my favorite genre, what can I say? You sort of got that look too though, not quite as intense.”

“Not a gentleman?” He chuckles.

“No.” You laugh, shaking your head. “At least I hope not.”

“I see. You don’t fancy the good boys. Well fortunately for you, I’m a bit of a troublemaker. At least, that’s what my schoolmates and family say,” he mentions. “What’s wrong with the good boys anyway? They could treat you like a lady.”

“Too gentle, I’m not a fan of it,” you answer honestly.

He smirks, sending warmth straight to your core. “So is your intention to get me out of here and treat you... not gently?”

“My intention is simply to buy you another drink, maybe enjoy a dance or two. What happens at the end of the night is not particularly on my mind right now. I’m more focused on learning your name. Why? Is that what you’d fancy?” You counter, looking up at him through your long lashes.

It has the effect you hoped for because he stands up straight, his back finally off the wall. He offers his hand to you, and you take it softly in yours. It’s so much bigger, so much warmer. You try your hardest to kill all the thoughts of where else you’d like him to touch you with his hand.

“Sirius Black,” he introduces himself.

“Like the star?” You question without thinking.

“Yes, like the star. Now what’s your name.”

“Y/n y/l/n,” you say.

“Charmed. So, how about that drink?”

You smile. It’s going to be a good night, you know it.

The next few hours go by in a flash. You and Sirius drink more than you probably should and dance to the many different songs that play on the jut box. A few different times throughout the night you find the eyes of your bandmates, each of them giving you big smiles and thumbs up as they watch you with Sirius. At one point Joan makes a lewd hand gesture, and you barely get a chance to see Lita smack her. It’s past twelve when you find yourself outside the pub with Sirius sitting on a curb sharing a cigarette.

“I hate these bloody shoes,” you mumble as you dig your heel into the pavement. “They make my feet sore.”

“Then why do you wear them?” Sirius asks, amusement evident in his tone.

You exhale a long breath of smoke, passing the half-burnt cigarette back to him. “I dunno. Beauty is pain.”

“For some, but I’m sure even without those things you’re just as pretty. Actually, I would bet pounds on that being true,” he replies.

“I think I’m rather plain without all this. Would you think the same of me without my makeup and outfit?”

You watch him smirk. “I should think you look even prettier without all of that on. Especially the clothes.”

Your stomach fills with butterflies for the thousandth time tonight. Your shyness left hours ago when you took your first shot. So, instead of simply blushing and looking away, you stand and look down at him with your own smirk.

“Quite the charmer. How about you find come back to mine and find out for yourself?”

He takes one last drag of the cigarette before standing, flicking it to the pavement, and crushing it beneath his sneaker. You watch helplessly as he releases a cloud of smoke, his hand now held out to you.

“I’d quite like that. Lead the way.”

~~~

You don’t know how you keep your composure the whole way home, especially with Sirius’s hand handing yours the entire time. On the train, as you sit, your head on his shoulder, he rubs his thumb across your knuckles. It’s a gesture that makes you glad you aren’t standing because your legs feel like jelly. And on the walk up to your apartment, he lets go of your hand and instead places it on the small of your back. You almost fall down the stairs at the contact.

Once you’re inside you immediately take off your boots, leaving them somewhere by the front door. Your jacket follows, only it’s hung on one of your kitchen chairs. When you turn to look at Sirius you find his eyes wandering all over your apartment, examining the details you assume. His sneakers are off, his hands are in his pockets.

“You must have a special job, this place is wonderful,” he says.

“My mates help me with the money, it’s not all mine,” you reply. It’s true, they do help you earn money from performing. You step closer to him, your hands behind your back. “And it’s really not that big. One bedroom, one bathroom, and one very tiny living room combined with the kitchen. But it’s more than enough for me. Would you like the tour?”

“Of course, if the tour starts in your bedroom.”

You can’t help the blush that takes over your face. “Follow me.”

The walk is fast, with every step you feel your heart rate increase. You’ve done this a few times, but for some reason, this time feels different. Perhaps it’s because all the other guys can’t compare to Sirius’s beauty in the slightest. Or perhaps it’s because you already like him a bit more than you should for a one-nighter. You don’t know. And you don’t care to know because you’re about to reach your door.

You open the door fast, letting him in first, and closing it behind you. It’s dark, the only lights coming from outside your small window. You don’t reach for the lights though. Instead, you step closer to the boy, the sound of your breathing suddenly far too loud for your liking. His silhouette moves closer to you as well. It’s almost like there’s an invisible force pushing the two of you together, and you find yourself liking it.

He touches you first. One of his hands finds your waist, he guides you to him faster. Soon enough, you’re practically pressed against him. You can barely breathe from the proximity. You’ve never felt something this intense. You look up at him, your bottom lip between your teeth.

“Still want me to not be gentle?” He asks, his voice barely above a whisper.

“I want you to ruin me,” you say, pressing one of your hands to his chest. You’re happy to find his heart is racing just like yours. “Don’t hold back.”

“Alright.”

Before you can even think of another thought, his lips are on yours. You kiss back instantaneously, your hand moving up into his hair. It’s soft, like you expected. He’s far from gentle with his kissing, and you’re glad. His lips move fast on yours, his teeth scraping your tongue. He bites down on your lip so hard you whimper, and the metallic taste of your blood clouds your senses.

Still, despite the pain, when he pulls back you almost whine from the loss of contact. But his hands move fast to pull your shirt up. You help him get it off, then move to his. Through the darkness, you can see the few tattoos he has on his chest and shoulder. They’re dark, they’re beautiful. You run your fingertips over them as he leans back down and connects your lips once again. You begin to guide the two of you towards your bed.

When the back of your knees hit the mattress, you allow yourself to fall back onto it. Sirius doesn’t follow you though. Instead, he stands between your legs at the foot of the bed and begins to undo the buttons of your jeans. You watch in awe, lifting your hips to help him drag them down your legs, leaving you only in your bra and panties. You sit up, your eyes on him, as you start undoing his belt.

After his jeans are on the floor he pushes you back down on the mattress, climbing over you this time. You kiss him deeply, dragging one of your hands down his warm back, and weaving the other through his hair. That warmth deep inside you has grown, consuming you entirely. You can feel the wetness between your legs, surely staining your panties. You’ve never been so turned on by a guy in your life.

He suddenly parts your kiss, his lips beginning to move down your jaw and neck. You moan, throwing your head back to give him more access. When he bites down on you, so hard you can feel a stinging from it breaking skin, you pull at his hair, sounds of pleasure escaping your swollen lips.

Eventually, after leaving many hickeys and bite marks on your neck, he pulls back entirely and flips you over onto your stomach. You smirk against the mattress as you feel him unclip your bra. To help get it off, you lift yourself on your hands, and the straps quickly fall. You throw it off without even thinking about it. You’re about to turn back but Sirius presses a hand between your shoulder blades, silently telling you to stay as you are. You don’t hesitate to comply.

You feel him move and instinctively you lift your hips in the air. He places a kiss on your back, it almost makes you shiver. Then his hands are on your hips, pulling your last piece of clothing off. You normally would feel some sense of vulnerability at this point. Completely naked with your ass in the air. But the alcohol mixed with the utter need you have for Sirius takes control. You feel him shift.

“Do you have a rubber?” The sound of his voice makes you squeeze your legs together.

“Unless you have a disease, you don’t need one. I’m on birth control,” you answer, looking over your shoulder at him.

“No diseases I swear,” he says.

“Then proceed.”

You get up properly on all fours, the anticipation killing you. When he positions his tip at your entrance, you inhale sharply. He rubs his cock through your wet folds for a few seconds, brushing against your clit ever so slightly, before thrusting inside you in one quick, hard motion. You can’t help the moan that leaves you. He’s big, stretching you in a way that’s on the brink of being painful. It’s perfect.

He fucks you hard, very hard. Each thrust hits that spot inside you that makes your legs shake. At one point, your arms give out and your face presses against the mattress. Your hands twist in the sheets, your moans muffled by the bed. Sirius doesn’t like this. He twists one of his hands in your hair and pulls you up, the pain only adding to the building of your orgasm.

“Sirius,” you gasp. “Fuck Sirius.”

He’s relentless. He fucks you through your first orgasm, not faltering for even a second. He only stops when you can’t hold yourself up anymore, pulling out and flipping you onto your back. You scratch your nails down his back as he begins to fuck you in missionary, your lips on his.

You don’t know how long passes by the time he tells you he’s close. What you do know is that your second orgasm is not far either. With tears in your eyes, you let him switch positions once again, this time you’re on top of him. Your muscles are weak and sore, but that doesn’t stop you from riding him as well as you can. Sweat covers your body, and incoherent words drip off your lips. You can barely take it anymore.

“I-I’m almost there,” you mumble.

“Me too love,” Sirius replies, his breath ragged. “Finish us both off.”

You struggle to hold yourself up, a tear rolling down your cheek. “I don’t know if I can.”

“You can, just a few more minutes,” he assures you, running one of his hands through your hair.

Much to his word, in a few minutes, he finishes. Hard. He moans your name in an indescribable tone, and his cock pulses inside you so intently, it causes your second orgasm to occur. As this happens, you lie on his chest, both of your breathing very uneven. He holds you tight against him.

Eventually, you roll off him and stare at your ceiling. You try to comprehend what just happened. Never in your life have you experienced something so intense. Most of the time when you told guys to be rough with you, they’d be turned off. But Sirius... You turn to your side to face him.

“Want a smoke?”

“Certainly.”

~~~

It’s safe to say, you don’t let him go all summer. You spend every second you can with him. Most of the time in your sheets, but a good amount doing other things. You paint his nails black, teach him how to wear eyeliner, and how to dress more like yourself. You enjoy every second you get with him.

He never does discover your fame, at least he never says so. You think he would know. Each time you go out you try your hardest to be unnoticeable and you always hide away magazines and switch the channel whenever something about your band is shown. But he never does say anything. Sometimes at night, you sing to him softly and you always laugh when he tells you that you should take it professionally.

You learn how much he hates his family, except for his little brother. You learn he loves Queen and David Bowie. You learn his favorite color is ironically black. You learn as much about him as you can and with each fact you do learn, you only fall more for him. But you never speak of it. You know the inevitable ending.

On the night before he goes back to school, the two of you lay in your bed, a thick silence between you. As usual, you pass a cigarette back and forth. Only this time, there are no words accompanying. Until he speaks.

“For once, I’m not looking forward to going back.”

You turn to your stomach and look at him. “I wish you didn’t have to go.”

“Me either,” he agrees. He holds the cigarette to you; you take it fast. “I can phone you if you want. You know, while I’m there. Or send letters.”

“Do you think that’s a good idea?” You question.

“I think I really fancy you, and I don’t want to leave on a bad note.”

You give him a weak smile and press a kiss on his bare shoulder. “Oh, Sirius.”

~~~

A few months later...

“Five minutes till show time,” an assistant tells you.

You’re sitting in your dressing room backstage. Joan, Sandy, and Lita all have their own space now. You find it funny how much The Runaways have blown up since the summer. Now, everywhere you turn you see yourself in a magazine or a news article. You can’t go anywhere without being recognized, or without the paparazzi showing up.

As you look in the mirror your mind travels back to Sirius. This happens a lot. Right before a concert, you think of him. Sometimes you wonder if maybe he’s out there listening. You haven’t heard from him since he went to school. You aren’t angry, only a bit sad. You’re mostly grateful though. He inspired most of the songs in your number-one album that got the band all the new attention.

You stand from the vanity and sigh. Tonight, your performance is being televised worldwide. Beside the door is your guitar, you pick it up as you begin your journey out to the stage. You’ve got a good lineup, even a small intermission for a happy birthday song. You hope wherever he is he hears it.

After all, it is November 3rd.

[jane-john-doe-tournament]

Jane Doe (Ride the Cyclone) Propaganda:

Great singing, also she’s literally wearing a doll‘s head bc she lost hers

do they have their soul or is it rotting somewhere with their head?

BALLAD OF JANE DOE IS SO SAD AND SHE IS GREAT AND I ONLY WATCH RTC ONCE BUT SHES NY FAVE OK

cool asf

She forgets her name after her death and has no story told in the production

She's so sweet and deserves the world. Her song (The Ballad of Jane Doe) is great.

the song goes so hard just listen to her song guys please

she literally died and her head was cut off so nobody could tell who she was PLEASE let her take one (1) W

BECAUSE SHE IS AMAZING. First she already won the tournament in the musical to regain life, as she won them over with her sad wet cat energy because she did not have a head and feared that she lost her soul. Second, she died on a roller coaster and lost her head, but stole her doll's head and thats very gender. Third, throughout the musical she is used as a vessel for religious allegory, she is an angel, she is jesus, she is a demon, she is forsaken but she is purity itself. Fourthly, she is is given the identity of Savannah with the greenest eyes after the other characters who died with her hold her a birthday party, and I think thats sweet because its probably some kind of meaning I cant see but auughfhfhh shes so cool

i mean her name isn't TECHNICALLY jane doe but we refer to her as such. she's so silly!! autism powers! i don't have a lot of propaganda tbh. i would've just been surprised had she NOT been submitted

She lost her head literally when the rollercoaster derailed. She wasn't able to be identified apart from the school uniform she was wearing.

Her name is forgotten, and so is everything about her. So she’s called Jane Doe. She’s very sweet and very creepy, but she doesn’t mean it

and im asking WHYYYYY LORRRRRDDD

I LOVE HER! she died in a roller coaster accident and was decapitated, her body not being found. in the show, her head is actually just her doll’s head. the coroners couldn’t identify her, so she was dubbed a jane doe. in the game to be alive again, she ends up being voted, her name being revealed to be penny lamb. anyways she’s a little creepy and also quite silly and she does her funny little waddle like a porcelain doll (or corpse).

She deserves it! She lost her head she shouldn't lose this too.

Not convinced you didn’t start this tournament just for her tbh

They have a great song and a true air of mystery to them. They also have arguably the best song in the musical, The Ballad of Jane Doe! I would definitely recommend listening to it >:)

—She LOST her HEAD and had it replaced with a PORCELAIN DOLL —In all seriousness her story is really poignant. No one could identify her body so she arrives in the afterlife not knowing her identity and she spends the show vacillating between depressed and angry at her situation, leading to… —“The Ballad of Jane Doe”, specifically Emily Rohm’s version, might be the most haunting solo in musical theatre history.

John Doe (Malevolent) Propaganda:

Spooky gay eldritch disaster (am I doing this right?)

Could have chosen any name for himself and picked John because a kind person called him that :)

fractured piece of an eldritch god that shares a body with a private eye after being fractured. chooses the name John Doe after said private eye goes into a coma

Because he’s an eldritch god who wants to feel human and who overcame a lot of obstacles and dangers!!! He sincerely cares about the main character!!! And he chose a name himself! Isn’t he cute??? He lost his body, he almost lost his memory, he fought for his right to exist, he loves animals, he loves his friend Arthur and I love him!

Being an ass, friendship, spooky supernatural stuff, he’s got it all

My man heard the name John Doe, realized he didn’t actually have a name, and just. Took it for himself.

I LOVE HIM. MY SON. HE’S TRYING TO CHANGE AND BE BETTER AND :(((( He’s a fragment of the soul of the King in Yellow (god of trickery and suffering iirc??) that gets trapped in a book in our realm while the rest of the King stayed in his own separate realm. When a human named Arthur Lester opens the book they get linked and John gains control of Arthur’s eyes & kills his partner (oops!). They proceed to go on a quest to find a way of separating them because neither likes the situation, and at first John (or The Entity, which is what he’s called at first) just wants to trick and use Arthur, and control his entire body (through the first season he also gets a hand & a foot) even though he doesn’t remember being The King In Yellow at the time, but Arthur makes him change and become more human. His turning point is when Arthur is shot and falls into a coma for a month. They get treated at a hospital and while John waits for Arthur to wake up so they can carry on, the body itself still gets taken care of. The time John spends alone, contemplating on humanity & everything he’s seeing and learning from Arthur, as well as the way a certain nurse speaks to him every day (specifically, she greets him good morning and good night, despite the body being unresponsive, John still hears because he is an entity linked to the body) and calls him John (they didn’t have ID on when they were found so they were classified as John Doe), changes his outlook and plans for good, and he asks Arthur to call him John; from this point on he admits he cares for Arthur, looks for his wellbeing too, and in general attempts to be a better person and to live for himself. The rest of the podcast (ongoing!!) explores Arthur & John’s relationship, struggle to survive, adventures in the eldritch… All while tackling each of their issues with themselves and each other and watching them both grow. John in specific learns to be the person he wants to be, how sometimes you’ll take a step forward and two backwards; he can be cruel and manipulative sometimes but he still tries. Personally I love his journey, it’s very realistic and you can see he is trying his best, and how he wants to be better than he was as the King In Yellow, and how much Arthur has changed him and how much he cares about him because of that; and how he’s slowly growing into being his own person :) if it ends badly ill cry so hard but!!! he’s John Doe because that’s the name he was being addressed as, and he’s made it his, and being John means he’s no longer the King and that he wants to be different, and John can fail or make mistakes but it’s part of who he is now, and that’s what matters. I am So Normal About Him

JOHN DOE (Malevolent) SWEEP

OH MY GOD JOHN DOE MY BELOVED 💛💛 (watch me just not clarify that would be so funny ahah) John doe (Malevolent) 💛💛💛 my silly He's so funny he makes Arthur bump his head into a dock because he didn't say duck in time and then laughs at him 💛💛

[bring-cringe-back]

Okay I might just be reading too much into this. But while I was watching the episode *cough cough* procrastinating *cough cough I realised that they don't show how the Doctor and Ruby got there.

And I know that it's probably just meant to be vaguely like 'they just went for fun'.

BUT this is the third episode in a row where we haven't seen them arrive. And for 73 yards it was clearly a doctor who episode when it started but it immediately gets rid of the doctor. ( I know that for 73 yards and for dot and bubble it was because Ncuti Gatwa was filming other stuff but let me cook) In Dot and Bubble you could effectively be forgiven for assuming that it was a random Black Mirror episode or something similar until the Doctor turns up, and tbh if you were just flicking through channels and haven't been watching Doctor Who you could probably basically not know for much longer. In Rogue they are just there, except for the title screen (the same for dot and bubble) you could basically watch it as a Bridgerton episode until the Chuldur turn up.

(And there's whole other rant about how the Chuldur fits into the theory about this basically being a TV show within a TV show, I don't know the name for this theory)

But anyway these episodes are increasingly separated from the Doctor and Ruby as plot points particularly in the beginning of episodes. They are more and more like an excuse to tell the story or explore the topic that the writers want to explore. Which isn't totally different from the occasional episode of previous series, but this is a lot more in my memory at least from previous series. So it feels a lot like they are skimming over the more sci-fi doctor who elements. Which fits in in my mind to the idea that the 'One who waits' is a representation of story telling. I've seen theories that it's Ruby but she doesn't know it which makes sense, I think it would also make sense for it to be her parent(s) who left her, or alternatively just it's own thing all together. But it feels very like that bit where Amy is living a life and starts to realise it's all fake.

The narrowing down of these episodes into not showing them arriving, and at least in Rogue - I can't remember in the others - not showing them leaving the story, feels very different.

It feels more and more like story telling. They have covered fairy tales, Period pieces/Romance, Dystopia, War/SciFi, Musicals, Political Drama. They are also showing the doctor playing his role, something that we see companions doing often enough but we seldom see the doctor doing it.

In Space Babies he is scared of a new creature. In the Devil's Code he sings a song that makes little sense in the story, he doesn't question the road making noise. In Boom he's more himself but it's also the closes to his 'normal' environment. In 73 Yards they just fully remove him from the story, which I realise was done for filming requirements but would have been so interesting to see the doctor in a Political drama. In Dot and Bubble he plays the role of the outsider bringing information to those living under a Dystopia, how is he UNABLE to access the inside, sure he plays a role that's fairly similar to himself but Doctor Who is really Dystopian.

In Rogue he is becoming more and more his role, he is playing the role of a sort of Elizabeth Bennet style character, a strong romantic interest for the brooding man. Which is great, he makes fun of the genre, but he is hyper aware of the genre and still ends up in its pitfalls. He trusts a man so quickly he ends up handing over his sonic, he gets proposed to and basically immediately accepts. Now I am really hoping that Rogue gets to stay around I really liked him as a character, regardless of which theory of his identity if any are true. But the Doctors reaction to him is still a little out of character, he is feeling what he is SUPPOSED to feel and he is acting how he is SUPPOSED to act.

It just feels to me like an increasing number of these episodes are more and more story like and more and more separated from the more Doctor Who elements. And the lack of an introduction of how they get there, and the lack of them leaving in the TARDIS is so unusual to me and stands out to my brain so much.

It feels like they are removing elements that don't fit the genre. Anyway not sure if that makes any sense but I'm vibing with it.

[intimesnewhomo]

Still fucking thinking abt this tbh.

Just. Genuinely fucking blown away by how utterly dogshit that crowd was. We were at the rail and for the most part the people in our immediate vicinity (besides the girls Right next to me and the guy on the other side of them) were absolutely wild and rowdy. I had a group of guys just behind me and to the left a little who were EXUBERANT and jumped at least half the show to the point of security telling them to calm down and one guy almost overheating lol and were rly rly crashing into me during Song for the Dead. The people immediately behind me and Harris were fucking rowdy too. The ladies we talked to a little and were on the other side of Harris were wildin out. So seeing people say that the crowd sucked? That the rail was lame? (From the ppl behind us no less, which was a wee bit insulting lol) I was like wtf are you guys talking about?

But then. Oh boy but then!

Harris looked up some show videos to see if we could see what the crowd looked like from farther back and holy shit. The way the crowd was fucking DEAD during Go With The Flow????? GO WITH THE FLOW????? You'd never fucking know you were @ a Queens show with Go with the fucking Flow playing Jesus Christ!!!!! You'd think you were watching an opener, not the headliner playing one of The™ songs.We were both shocked at how fucking just. Bad it was!!!!! It's genuinely no wonder Josh seemed kinda fucking Pissed all night and just fucking rushed off stage I feel so fucking bad for them and fucking embarrassed about being in that fucking crowd.

So I'm firebombing Nas.hville off the face of the earth actually!!!!!!

[sam-loves-seb]

ao3 wrapped 2024

i love doing this every year, thank you for the tags my wonderful beloved friends <3

tagged by @energievie @mybrainismelted @sgtmickeyslaughter

How many words have you written this year?

338,560

How many works did you publish this year?

30 (on ao3, not counting drabbles or ficlets on tumblr)

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

medium hot with sugar - coffee shop au (gallavich)

What work of yours has the most hits?

shameless: i'm not the way i was (17,844)

9-1-1: he'll never love you like i can (7,026)

What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

span the distance (bridge the border) - post-canon gallavich fic where mickey's brothers show up unexpectedly

Favorite title you used.

i'm not the way i was (insp.)

If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

i use a lot of different artists tbh i don't think i have more than 2 or maybe 3 from the same artist ?? but probably blink-182 or noah kahan just from what i'm seeing at a quick glance

Pairing you wrote the most for this year?

ian gallagher/mickey milkovich

Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?

ian gallagher/mickey milkovich !!!

What work was the quickest to write?

it was you, all the way down - my shortest fic of the year but also the quickest to write, i remember writing this in one sitting and the words just poured out of me like crazy (inspired by gigi's art x)

What work took you the longest to write?

technically it's i'm not the way i was considering i still haven't finished it, but if we're only counting completed fics then it's soon you'll get better

How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

three (x x x) ongoing wips and four (ish) wips that are either in very early planning stages or have the first 1-2 chapters written

What’s your longest work of the year?

9-1-1: god only knows where this could go (7,039 words)

shameless: i'm not the way i was (103,829 words)

What’s your shortest work of the year?

9-1-1: california dreamin' (1,861 words)

shameless: it was you, all the way down (866 words)

What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

these three (x x x)

What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?

"Not Beta Read" (21) followed by "One Shot" (18)

Your favorite character to write this year?

mickey freaking milkovich baby

The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

probably buck buckley (9-1-1) i can't seem to nail his voice in a way that satisfies me (i'm gonna keep trying!)

What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

been thinking a lot about steve harrington/eddie munson (steddie) lately and i have written for them before but i have an idea or two i wanna possibly get into writing in the new year (and with st s5 coming out i'm sure i'll have more to say then)

Which work of yours have you reread the most?

went too far to soothe this soul

How many kudos in total did you get this year?

12,121

Which work has the most comments?

i'm not the way i was (398)

Did you do any collaborative works this year?

yes! i co-wrote Then and Now with @suzy-queued for the gallavich summer camp event this year!!

Did you write any gifts this year?

yes, i wrote:

find someone who grows flowers (in the darkest parts of you) for NotHereNJ for the 2024 gallavich gift exchange

it was you, all the way down for @heymrspatel for being one of the winning admirers with the gallavich art masquerade

buddie week (connor's version) 6 buddie fics for my best friend's birthday (ily @karenandthababes )

Did you receive any gifts this year?

yes! i receieved some wonderful gifts this year:

Frosting on His Nose from @heymrspatel for the 2024 gge (i'm still literally obsessed with this art)

all i know is a simple name from @jessbakescakes based on a very old joshdonna prompt i gave her many moons ago (love this fic to bits)

and idk if it counts as a gift but i'm putting it here anyway because @konaiiro drew a scene from one of my fics and i love it dearly <3

What’s your most common category?

m/m, fluff, whump, post-canon

What do you listen to while writing?

absolutely nothing, or sometimes white noise. very rarely am i able to listen to any kind of music, and even then it has to have no lyrics.

Favorite work you wrote this year?

life changes

Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

this is my favorite bit i wrote this year, cw: self harm, hospitalization, read at your own risk:

“Twelve stitches,” Mickey tells him, voice wobbly and vision blurry. “Doc said it might scar, but. Yeah. It’ll heal.” It’s like something clicks in Ian’s brain, maybe. Like he remembers. Like he knows the events that happened to lead him here, but he can’t quite comprehend them. He lowers his bandaged arm back to the bed and stares at the wall. He doesn’t look at Mickey again. “So, um. Yeah. They patched you up,” Mickey says, the first tear falling down his cheek. He wipes it away, but the second isn’t far behind and he gives up trying to hide it. “You’ve been sleepin’ basically all night. They said you would. Said what happened was… traumatic, or whatever, and you’d need lots of rest.” “Stop,” Ian pleads. He closes his eyes, the words too painful to hear. To accept, maybe. Mickey nods, looking down at the floor. He twists his mouth to one side, sniffs. “I know you don’t wanna hear it. And you’re probably gonna hate me for makin’ you go to one of these places again—” “Don’t,” Ian whispers. “You’re gonna get some fucking help, Ian.” Mickey wipes at his face with the back of his hand. “I—I’m out of my depth here. But they’re gonna take good care of you, okay? It’s seventy-two hours. The doctors and shit, they’re gonna help you. ‘Cause I… I don’t know what else to do. And if you hate me for that—fine. I can live with that.” He sniffs. “But I can’t live without you. Okay? Do you get that?” “Mickey,” Ian pleads, but he won’t look at him, won’t open his eyes. He can’t. (x)

Biggest surprise while writing this year?

The sense of community in the shameless fandom never fails to surprise me. It's one of my favorite fandoms I've ever been in, and the wonderful people i meet writing and reading and talking about these characters pushes me to keep writing. I don't think I'd still be writing without this lovely community tbh

x

tagging (if you haven't done this yet): @jessbakescakes @iceyartt @deathclassic @whatthebodygraspsnot @crossmydna @jrooc @deedala @suzy-queued and anyone else who wants to play!

[cassiebones]

What headcanons would you have for Alice or Jen in Agatha All Along? :)

Alice was a mama's girl despite their difficult relationship. Her mother was much better at showing her love for Alice than Evanora was at showing hers (if there ever was any love for Agatha) but she focused so much on breaking a curse that Alice was certain was never actually real. Alice still craved her attention, always proud to show her something she made or playing her a new song that she learned.

Alice is not a morning person. She was the one who signed up for graveyard shifts as a cop. She thrived on late nights, the moon giving her more energy. She was always happy to take somebody's late night shifts for them. She sometimes had to work mornings, which made her long for the sweet release of Death.

Despite her moody, edgy style, she needs a crap ton of sugar in her coffee. She cannot drink it black like her co-workers always did. They teased her for this, but she was fine with her Cinnamon Dolce lattes, thank you very much.

That tattoo was not her mother's idea, originally. Alice saw her mother stressing out over the curse and looked up ways that she could protect herself in a more permanent way than wearing a necklace she may lose or something else like that. So she looked up the symbol and showed her mother, who didn't even hesitate to book her with a friend. Lorna held her hand the entire time, and Alice forced herself not to cry from the pain, trying to be brave for her mother.

Alice visited her mother's grave (which wasn't a real grave bc she didn't have enough of her mother to bury) on every major holiday, leaving flowers and crystals (because her mother believed in their power) and talking to her about how her life is going.

She had a cat, named Cheeto, who was the most orange cat you ever met. She loved him, though. She found him while working, when he was still a kitten. She fell in love with him immediately and brought him home with her after her shift ended. She told Jen about him before she died. Jen goes to her apartment after getting off The Road, and takes Cheeto home with her, honoring Alice in the only way she can.

Jen is almost the opposite of Alice.

She is a morning person. She likes to wake with the sun and do yoga and all that healthy shit. She has a brand to uphold, after all.

She does GRWM videos all the time, showing people what she puts in her organic smoothies (cutting out the part where she puts in protein powder that nobody can know she uses) and egg-white omelettes. She's a vegetarian onscreen only.

Again, it's her brand. Her last name is literally a vegetable (she makes cannibalism jokes when she adds kale to her smoothies).

She's always been openly bisexual and has several pieces of art that reflect that in her home. She laments about her dating life a lot online and has gotten several offers from her fans to be taken on dates. She almost always declines, but she's touched obviously by the interest.

She and Agatha had a situationship. Jen started to catch feelings, but Agatha was closed off emotionally because she was still hung up on Rio and the pain she'd caused. When Jen tried to get closer, Agatha pushed her away and was not nice about it. She figured it'd be easier if Jen hated her. Jen was definitely bitter, which is why she believed every bad thing that anybody had to say about Agatha, including that she traded away her own son for the Darkhold.

She bound herself, I think. I think Agatha was lying about having bound her in the 1920's. Not that I don't think she would have done that for money (she'd probably do it for shits and giggles tbh) but I don't think Agatha actually did it to Jen. I think Jen was so traumatized by the men who tried to bind her that she actually end up binding herself. She just convinced herself that it was them that bound her because it was the easier solution.

Jen genuinely loves hiking. It's the best way to unplug and just be herself for a little bit. She'll go to the nearest mountain and just walk for miles until she gets tired. She loves watching sunsets on these hikes. She also secretly loves camping because it reminds her of the years she had to spend living off the land as a younger witch.

She also really loves spas. She has a standing bi-weekly appointment at her local spa. She's a complicated person.

If Alice had lived, there's no doubt in my mind that she and Jen would have become a thing. Opposites attract and all that. They both have trauma, even if it's different kinds of trauma. I think they'd make a good pair.

Agatha would tease them and claim to be the reason they got together. She wouldn't exactly be wrong.

[heyidkyay]

And I'm petrified of being alone, now |

Part Eleven

Matty Healy x reader

Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.

What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way? 

Authors Note: Hiiiiii, it's been a while:) Sorry, had a lot going on tbh very hectic and stressy but I had most of this written out before life got all messy and so I just tried my best to finish it! Hope you all had a happy holidays, whether you celebrated anything or just had a lovely few days, also wishing you a very happy new year!! Here's hoping it'll be a good one x Alsooo, a big thank you to @procrastinatinglikeapro who's an utter angel and without this part wouldn't have been finished!<3

Onto part eleven I suppose!

Masterlist

It’d been too long a day, though it had only just gone eleven. So Matty had decided to take a well earned break that no one else seemed to be fully aware of. He’d left George and Adam to themselves, the pair caught up in a heated discussion about a particular opening to a new song they’d been working on, and Ross was off in the booth playing something or other just to escape the rest of them. He’d had a late one the night before and was feeling the effects of it, poor prat.

Matty reckoned that he probably had a good while before Jamie strolled in though, or before George started getting aggy about the current chord progression, so he’d taken to one of the far corners of the studio to slink into the small sofa there and pull out his phone.

Messages now Squeaks I’m meant to be prepping for recording!! Stop distracting me.

Matty grinned to himself at the most recent text he’d received. They’d been at it since six this morning, but he’d yet to grow tired and so was already typing one back. 

Messages now Ditto babe So it would seem that you are the one now distracting me

He shook his head at the next reply that came through, but had to agree with her point; Adi seemed a whole lot scarier than the three twats he’d been burdened with. Even so, he couldn’t let her know that, could he? Or have the last word either. It was a matter of principle now.

See, it’d been a few weeks since that night at the club and the morning after in the quietness that was her flat- a place that still swarmed his thoughts during moments of the day when he felt his mind drift. He’d been so caught up in the moment back then, in her and in being allowed that close, that he hadn’t paid much mind to everything else. Too focused on watching, observing the way she behaved in a place so full of comfort. He only wished now that he had nosed around a bit more, her bedroom hadn’t given much away and neither had her kitchen, but those had been the only two places he’d been able to linger.

Still, afterwards he thought that the whole situation might’ve stirred things up for them, what with her dickhead of a mate and his waking up in her bed. Because most girls either fell arse over tit wanting to get into his trousers, or rather a chance in the spotlight, whilst others ran headfirst through the nearest fire exit door. 

Mouse though, she was something else.

She kept him at arm's length, that was for sure. Made it clear she had boundaries, even if she was open to a bit of harmless flirting here and there. But he’d just put that down to her being more mature than most of the women he’d met. She was also dead set on them just being mates, and he could do that, really, he could. He had tons of female friends, ‘cause why not, right? So he knew he could hold back. He could.

Saying that though, Squeaks hadn’t just stuck around for a short time to live within the confines of his fame-covered umbrella and, honest to God, it was refreshing just how much she didn’t seem to mind the headlines nor the fans that came along with him. She loved his music, yeah, she’d made that part known- or at least their older stuff, bit mean- but that was it. She asked for nothing but his company. 

And even then, that had been all down to him. He had sought her out. Not the other way around. So he was always wondering over it, over why and over her.

Usually, people like that were hard to come by these days, or were simply playing the long game. He’d seen it happen plenty times before, not just with himself, but with his parents too, and other people within the industry. It didn’t feel that way with her though. It was why he’d been so reluctant to share her anymore than he already had, ie. Jamie and now Danny too, he supposed. Although the latter hadn’t really asked much after her since their night out, on the low now that he feared Jamie was after his head. Matty couldn’t muster up any sympathy. 

And during the last few weeks, he had practically forced his way into her life even further. Too scared that if he didn’t, if he relaxed, that she would just play it safe and walk away, and he wouldn’t have that. So, they’d gone from texting at all hours of the day to phoning most nights now that he had a set routine in London for a short while. And sometimes, if he was lucky, they would facetime and he’d feel his heartbeat pick up at the sight of her tired smile.

It was nice. 

New.

Made him feel like a kid again, in truth. As though someone liked him just for being himself. His pushy, egotistical maybe, but simple self.

She’d probably rib him to bits if she could hear him now, all soppy like. But even so, he couldn’t find it in himself to take any of it back.

“Oi, loverboy! Gonna tell us what new model’s got you grinnin’ like that then?”

Matty’s head snapped up at the familiar lilt of George’s teasing voice, who was still seated in the cushy chair he’d long ago claimed but had since turned in to glance over at him.

“Nothing like that, dickhead.” And at George’s disbelieving hum, Matty rolled his eyes and tacked on, “Believe what you like, man. You finished sorting that section or not?”

George mimicked the action, though with less of his usual irritated flare, and cocked his head in the direction of his laptop. “Just about. Only gotta tune shit up now.” Then he glanced back at him, leaning in the chair with his hands linked across his front, “So are you going to finally tell us what’s had you so distracted lately? Feels like every time I see you you're glued to your phone. Not back on Twitter, are you?”

Matty glared at the mention of the app, because yes he was, but who the fuck was George to judge him for it? So he lied.

“No,” He scoffed just as his phone buzzed once more in his hand, it really was a great fucking struggle for him not to just go ahead and quickly check it. “Just scrolling. Why don’t you mind your business, egghead?”

It was a cheap shot, but all the questions had left him flustered. He was only fucking human, yeah?

“Ah, leave him be! It’s nice not to have him in my ear constantly.” Hann, the backstabbing twat, laughed and shot Matty an amused smile, as though that would lessen the blow. Matty rolled his eyes once more.

“Yeah, yeah. Can we get back to work now?”

George’s eyebrows rose a tad but he blew out a long breath and simply shrugged, “Whatever. Just let us know if it’s anything serious.”

Matty withheld the petulant urge to get all huffy with the lot of them and instead shoved his phone into his back pocket so that he could grab the neck of his guitar and not succumb to the overwhelming urge to have a peek.

Fucking overbearing glibs. Always wanting in on everything. 

Though he supposed he couldn’t blame them, not really, seeing as he’d kept them on the outskirts of his life for so long now. Always keeping secrets, that it was practically now his trade. But well, a drug addiction would do that, and it wasn’t like he could go back and alter things. 

This was a real change of pace for him, sure, but after all the crap that had come with the past year, Matty guessed that this couldn’t be easy for any of them either. It was definitely a shift.

He’d leave it. For now, at least. They could let him have this.

“Nah, nah, go and play that again.” Matty spoke up once he’d made his way back on over, listening to the loop Hann had just hit play on, “Who put that shit in? Sounds fucking awful!” And in turn, received a notebook to the head.

***

“... So yeah, Ads ended up putting the fire extinguisher to good use- our first go of it, too!” I felt the need to tack on, grinning at the very reminder of it as I filled up a pot to boil. “There was a crap ton of foam everywhere-”

“Language!” The woman admonished me from down the phone and I rolled my eyes around a faint chuckle.

“I’m twenty-three, mam! You can't scold me anymore and besides, I could have said a lot worse than crap, you know?”

She still tutted, displeased, “And what if Teddy were to hear? You wish for him to be spouting that the next time he’s at garderie?”

Shaking my head in amusement, I flicked on the hob and turned to pick the phone back up. “Nursery’s probably already heard it all.” I snorted, remembering the most recent mishap made by Teddy’s friend, Issie, when she had sworn in front of the entire school last assembly. “Anyway, he’s not even here! He’s been hypnotised by the tele.”

“I don’t think I will ever understand the charm behind that invention. It rots brains, ma mie!”

“Eh, so they claim.” I retorted with a meagre shrug whilst shuffling across the kitchen floor to find the pasta I'd left on the other counter, “But all it’s doing right now is keeping him out from under my feet whilst I make a start on tea.”

Even through the phone I could feel her exasperation.

“Et encore,” The woman stressed and I smiled mostly to myself as I propped my phone up against the wall again so that I could measure and still see her. She seemed to let the subject go though, because her next question was, “What are you making anyway?”

I told her and whilst I allowed her to direct me (and berate my cooking skills- even though I was her best student! As well as her only, I supposed) I prattled on about the rest of my day spent at the studio and then down at the shops after having picked up Teds from school. The little weirdo had tried to lure a pigeon in after us and failed helplessly. 

So it wasn’t too long before she finally interrupted my ramblings, in fact I’d almost finished with the sauce I was mixing.

“You’ve been glowing lately.” I heard her say and I grinned around the finger I had popped in my mouth, having just tasted the creamy béchamel.

“I am?”

She hummed quietly whilst I chanced a glance over at her, “Hm, it’s new, nice.”

I snorted, unsure on how to take that. “Thanks?”

My mum merely rolled her eyes mirthfully, a small smile flickering at the corners of her mouth, “Have you thought about Noël much more?”

Pursing my lips, I leant forward to check on the still boiling pasta- not long now, I deemed. “I dunno if we can make it, mam. Last time we took the boat out Teds was ill for days after and I don’t want him spending Christmas like that, especially seeing as I have to be here up until the twenty-third, the second if I keep praying!”

“Okay.”

I paused instantly and rocked back on my heels to frown at her, having expected more of an argument. “Okay? What do you mean, okay? Do you not want me home or something?”

Mam just shook her head, chuckling quietly, and I felt the crease between my brows deepen. “Non! It just means that the plane ticket I bought won’t go to waste.”

Blinking, I spluttered out, “Hang on, plane ticket?? Since when do you fly!”

“Since I realised that nearly a whole year has passed since I last saw my family! Too long, mon cœur.” She shot straight back at me and I felt myself chuckle softly at her, feeling my heart swell enough to override the evident guilt that stirred.

“I’m sorry, maman. I didn’t mean for it to be so long, just…”

“Life, mon cher, life carries on and it keeps us busy. You most of all, with your show and the baby.” She consoled, her face so full of warmth.

“Hardly a baby now.” I felt the urge to mumble but she simply waved me off.

“As well as this new glow of yours!” She added, confusing me enough to laugh a little and question what she meant. “Don’t play me for a fool, chéri, I raised you! There is someone, isn’t there?”

“Someone?” I quipped right back, very much bewildered by this whole new conversation we were now having. “What are you getting at?”

She clucked her tongue at me, as though she thought I was just playing at being dense, and so I watched on as she lifted her eyes towards the ceiling. “Someone new! A mystery man, peut être?”

I gawped, spluttered, and then shook my head, “No, non! Far from! God, can’t a girl just glow? I’m just happy, maman!”

“Ah, so I am right! You’re blushing.”

“Am not!”

My mum merely laughed at my petulance in return. “You are, Souris! It’s nothing to be ashamed of, if you don’t want to tell me more then I will leave it, for now. It looks good on you though.”

“Maman.” I groaned, “You couldn’t be more wrong about this.”

“I know my own child, crois-moi.” Was all that she replied, shrugging simply whilst I stood frozen in my kitchen hundreds of miles away from her. I knew she wouldn’t budge though. “But I want to know more soon! Maybe when I visit.” She proposed.

My eyes widened and it took everything in me not to pester her any further on what the hell she’d meant by it all. Seeing someone? I mean, she was out of her mind. I hadn’t spared even a glance at anyone in that way since, well since Teddy! And she knew this.

“Now, you should probably do something about that pot, amour. It’s bubbling over.”

That was all I needed to force myself back into the present and I swore up a storm as I rushed over to save the pasta on the stove. 

–

“Did you see it? Did you see it? Did you see it?”

I reeled back at the sudden presence of an overwhelming Adi, who had shot up to greet me at the studio door as I walked in, curls bouncing every which way. I laughed, more than a little surprised by the intrusion as I attempted to step around her and get further inside. It didn’t work as well as I hoped though, seeing how she scuttled after me like a baby duckling who’d just learned to walk.

“Christ, Ads! At least lemme put my shit down.” I told her, all but skidding around the settee to throw my bag onto it. “Only just about managed to escape a Teddy Tantrum on the way in.”

Even with the mention of the almost meltdown from the monster that was my toddler she still powered on, bouncing on the balls of her feet, phone clutched tightly in the hand she held close to her chest. “But did you see it!” She pestered me, the stress and excitement of the situation evident in the pitch of her voice.

Looking at her, I knew I just had to put her out of her misery. “Yes, I saw it.” I smiled slyly, shaking my head fondly whilst I moved over towards the kitchenette. “Brew?” I wondered aloud and she shot me the most scathing look.

“Forget tea! There’s no time for tea! Are we doing it, or not?!” Adi immediately fired back, eyes now as wide as dinner plates.

I tried so hard to keep my growing grin from view, messing with the cups atop the fridge, but she was nothing if not adamant.

“Mouse!”

Breaking, I laughed at her and glanced over to where she stood an arms length away, practically ready to explode. “Why wouldn’t we be?” I asked and her mouth dropped open at the insinuation of my words and the hope she’d been attempting to hide blossomed into pure elation. 

“You’re serious? You’re not just messing with me? Because I will strangle you right here, right now!”

My eyebrows rose, but I was still grinning away. “I go down fighting, babe.”

“Don’t I know it- still have the scar from when we wrestled over who got to say the first hello to Bono!”

I grinned proudly but did remind her, “And I still have nightmares about your teeth buried in my left thigh.”

“Oi, that healed!”

I snorted, “And? The trauma didn’t.”

Adi rolled her eyes and then smiled over at me. “I can’t believe you’re actually agreeing to do this.” She breathed, watching me ever so closely now.

I shrugged, feeling a little sheepish but mostly just trying not to think about the circumstances of it all. “It’s for charity- and besides, they asked. I couldn’t say no, could I?”

A crease formed between her dark knitted brows, “You could. I know I’m excited and all but, if you’re not comfortable with it…” She trailed off and I hated seeing her all mopey and concerned, it rivalled Teddy’s best set of puppy-dog eyes. An art he’d mastered since before he’d been able to sit up on his own.

“I know.” I assured her kindly as I propped myself up against the counter, “I want to do it though, Ads. It’s for a good cause and whatnot. Plus, I’ll have you there with me and it’s not like we’ll be in front of any cameras.”

“Maybe not you, but I'm soaking it all up, babe!” Adi immediately retorted and she flicked her hair over her shoulder for dramatic effect, “A face like this was made to be seen.”

I smirked and continued with the task I’d set of refilling the kettle, “And who would I be if I denied the world that chance?”

“Exactly.” She said, then chuckled, moving across the floor to shoot two tea bags into the mugs I’d gathered. “Now, all we need to do is work out what to wear.”

“And what questions to ask! They said they’re still unsure on the lineup this year. What with it being all new and whatnot.” I mentioned, having been thinking on that specific issue since the ask had come through the previous afternoon. 

It wasn’t a huge gala type event, nothing like the Met or the Brits, but it was going to be a big showcase in the leadup to Christmas. Something that was going to help provide a lot to those who were going without this year. From what I’d gathered, there would be variety acts, musical performances, comedians, dancers and the like, and it was meant to be broadcasted across the entire country. So, to say this was a big deal for us. A radio show I’d started in my bedroom! Was a massive understatement.

“I mean, an actual red carpet, Mouse!” Adi finally squealed, letting loose all the obvious excitement she’d been holding in. “Come on, even you’ve got to be looking forward to that!”

I nudged her hip slightly as I went for the milk, silently rebuking that comment, but she just laughed in turn. “I am, to be fair. It’s going to be a whole lot different from what we’re used to though.”

Adi merely flashed me a bright eyed grin, “Exactly why we need to dress to the nines, babe! Gotta show these haughty celebs that we can roll with the likes of them.”

I cackled when she did and then shook my head, extra careful not to go spilling any of the hot tea we’d brewed as we made our way back over towards the settee. This was definitely going to be one for the books.

***

“You got all that?”

The others all gave their own variation of a confirmation to their stressy manager whilst Matty’s attention deferred, eyes jumping ever so quickly from one thing to another.

“Matty mate, you hearing me?”

A barge shook him in his stance and he turned towards Jamie and the rest of the guys with raised brows before he huffed.

“Yeah, yeah- album, smiles, don’t be a fuckhead.” He listed off, already glancing away.

Ross snorted over Jamie’s head, who in turn rolled his eyes at Matty’s blatant tone. “Don’t fuck this one up, it’ll be good for your image, alright?”

“We won’t.” Hann promised him with that gentle smile of his just as George clapped the older man’s shoulder, “Try not to have a heart attack before we make it to the end, man.”

“I’ll be fucking lucky.” Matty heard Jamie mutter under his breath just before they were herded off towards the start of the carpet where a shit ton of fans and a horde of cameras waited.

“You doing alright though?”

Matty hummed at the quiet question, dipping his chin ever so slightly. He was alright. It just felt different, being at something like this stone cold sober. It had been too long, in truth. Actually, he’d begun to wonder if he’d ever not been on something since they’d first shot up to fame and been forced to attend shit like this. He lingered on that very thought even as he replied.

“Fine, just thinking over the opening.” He clasped his hands before him to keep himself from fidgeting any more than he had been. He was always fucking doing it, drove people crazy, or so he’d been told.

“You’ll ace it.” Ross whispered to him around a conspiratorial grin, squeezing Matty’s upper arm once before they were all called into the onslaught by an usher. “Show time, boys!” He added and with it, Matty forced out a breath.

Stepping onto a carpet always felt like entering a whole other reality, whether it was a black tie event or something sweet and easy. There was just nowhere that you could possibly hide to escape the cameras or the shouts and cries of people vying for your attention. It was easy to follow their directions though, ‘Over here!’ or ‘To your left!’, but it was much harder to tune out the other shit that got thrown their way.

“Matty! Matty! How was rehab?” One shouted, “Are you lot breaking up then?” Went another. “George, where’s Charli? And the after party, what about the after party?”

Matty bared his teeth and grinned through it, knowing he’d only be making things more difficult for himself if he gave them any inclination that he’d heard, let alone a real reaction.

By the time they made it off the first half though, away from all the blinding lights and constant flashing, Matty didn’t even get a chance to regroup before he felt himself already being steered towards the next horde of press.

He dragged a helpless hand down his face, bracing himself as best he could, before dozens, if not more, interviewers came into view, all eager to get their questions in, maybe find a way to have someone slip up and earn themselves a column in some crappy rag or paper. 

Typically, he didn’t mind this part. Here he got to work his magic, charm and woo whoever it was standing behind the camera and then swiftly move on. It was everything he enjoyed in an interview; three, four questions max and then he was gone. Like smoke in the wind.

Matty smiled at the notion, then stepped up in between Hann and Ross to greet the first bloke who’d reached out for them.

Somehow he managed to persevere on through and make it nearer to the end. Normally it was there that they could evade most of the microphones stuck their way and make a swift exit into the awaiting building. But just as Matty opened his mouth to suggest it to the others, his eyes caught on something in the corner, or rather someone.

“Oh shit.”

“Yeah, it’s been a bit mental. But it’s over now though, mate.” Matty heard one of the others say in response to him as they clapped his shoulder heartily, but they obviously hadn’t realised that he hadn’t been moaning about the whole ordeal, not even moaning at all actually. No, he’d just been fucking shocked to the core and all but rooted to the red carpet in surprise and that was all the words that he could let escape.

Before he could think to correct them, or let them know, he somehow managed to unstick his feet and start hurrying in a whole other direction. They called out when they noticed but he paid them no mind, flicking at his blazer sleeves and then wiping his hands discreetly to get rid of that clammy sheen they always managed to create whenever he was on edge.

Because how could he not be? When Mouse was standing there at the very skirtings of the crowd, just behind a staged barrier. Her of all people. And Matty couldn’t quite manage to tear his gaze away. Sights set as he bulldozed on through people to get closer and closer. 

She looked incredible. There was no denying that. Different to whatever he’d gone and made up in his head- something to do with a romantic dinner and them being all dressed up- but beautiful nonetheless. He found it difficult not to wonder over how no one else seemed to be lured towards her, how nobody else had gone over and asked why she was standing on that side of the barrier and not with the rest of this sorry lot on the carpet. Because-

Fuck, she was just stunning in that getup. Wasn't she? All red and pretty. Cheeks matching the sleek colour of her dress, smile unapologetic and wide. It was honestly so fucking hard to chance a blink let alone look away, worried she might not be there at all if he did.

She was talking with someone though, who had their back to him, eyes flickering up every now and again to check on the celebs heading their way. Actually, it was just as she did so once more that those eyes of hers spotted him through the small crowd near the edge, making her stutter in her stance and blink as though he was a mirage.

Matty grinned, unable to do much else, except manage a hurried jog the rest of the way, just needing to be near, to talk to her.

“The hell are you doing here?” Were the first words to spill from her painted lips, causing his grin to slip on into a full-on beam. 

God, she sounded so startled, so sweet. He realised then that he’d actually missed her voice- and it’d only been a day since they’d last phoned. A short thing, before she had gone and fallen asleep to his senseless prattling, leaving him to watch her for a minute, or sixteen, before he’d finally hung up.

“Me! How about you?” Matty immediately countered, shaking his head at her cheek, “You never mentioned it.”

She smiled brightly, mouth moving but unable to form any real words, before she was swiftly interrupted, “You never mentioned it?!”

Her head snapped over towards the voice’s owner as did Matty’s, and he was rather bewildered to see Adi stood there, looking lovely in a white ensemble.

“She never mentioned it??”

He blinked at Adi’s almost screech, realising then that the girl had been speaking to him, and so he nodded hurriedly in answer, still grinning away at the eccentrics. “No, she fucking didn’t! So imagine my surprise, hey?”

“You cow!” Adi tutted, elbowing Mouse who looked a tad affronted by it all. “How could you not tell him?”

“I didn’t tell anyone!” She immediately countered, rubbing at her arm, “And anyway, I didn’t know he’d be here! Why are you here?” She looked at him then, eyes narrowed and nose wrinkled in angry confusion.

Matty couldn’t stop the soft snort that escaped him whilst she merely rolled her eyes in turn.

“Fine- stupid question. But you never mentioned it either!” Was her semi-sort-of-valid retort. He hadn’t mentioned it by name, he could admit that, just that he’d be busy tonight doing crappy promo shit.

“I did!” He argued anyway, because he couldn’t not with her.

“Did not!”

“Oh, and what have we wandered into here then?” Came George’s familiar lilt just as the rest of the band’s steady presence followed behind him, “Not starting catfights already, are you?”

Matty thinned his lips into an exaggerated smile when he turned to look up at him, “Hilarious. No, as it turns out I do have mates outside of you lot.”

George feigned a look of scandal then snapped his gaze over towards where Ross and Hann were standing, “You hear that? He’s gone and made friends all on his own!” Then, being the condescending prick that he was, he reached out to ruffle Matty’s previously styled hair.

Matty was quick to smack his arm away, huffing at the thought of what storm would now surely follow when their stylist finally caught a glimpse at the pictures of him looking a state. “She’ll kill me, you dick.”

Knowing just who he was referring to, George barked out an uncaring laugh. “Oh give over, you’ll survive.” Then he appeared to remember what had brought them over in the first place, looking away he asked, “And who might you be?”

Matty’s eyes instantly tracked Mouse, who got all flustered at having everyone’s attention suddenly on her. Her cheeks flushed further and her eyes skirted everywhere but them before they finally found his, he tried to flash her an apologetic smile. Thankfully, Adi was able to save her before Matty could think of a way out of this whole shitshow.

“Adeline Wells,” She was quick to introduce, heavy gaze flitting over George’s tall form before trailing back to the two stood behind them, “We’re from Mouse On A Mic.”

Hann appeared to blink in recognition, a flash of surprise donning his usually stoic features, but it was Ross that replied, “The radio show that rinsed Matty?”

“That was you?” George piped up, eyebrows reaching his hairline as he stared down at Adi.

“No actually, that would be me.” Mouse felt the need to clear up with a strained smile, lifting her hand as though her admission hadn’t captured all of their attention. 

George’s face wrinkled further and so Matty was hasty in his move to slip in between them, closing the distance between him and Mouse so that now only the sodding barrier separated them.

“And isn’t she just lovely?” He intervened with a grin, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and settling there even though the harsh metal prodded into his hip unforgivingly. 

George frowned in confusion whilst Hann smiled politely, dipping his head in a silent hello to both of the women. Ross on the other hand was a whole other story, he just started laughing.

“Oh shit!” He called out, hand falling to the top of his stomach whilst his mouth and eyes widened in amusement, “This is her, isn’t it?”

Matty’s own eyes grew as he shot Ross a warning look, feeling Mouse tense a tad beneath him.

Adi was having none of it though, eager to know more. “What about her?” She pivoted on a sleek heel to stare the pair of them down, eyes narrowed enough to instil a bit of fear into Matty himself.

Ross raised his hands up in a way that intended he’d meant no harm by the comment, “Nothing! Well, nothing bad at least.”

Adi raised a carved brow in retort whilst Mouse just turned to glance up at him, he humoured the thought of pretending not to notice it but couldn’t bring himself to even try.

“What’s he mean? I thought we moved past all that.” She murmured to him, looking so small under him now that he fought to wave all her worries away.

“No, no we did. Ross is just being a pillock, babe. In’t that right, Ross?” Matty’s words were pointed and direct enough that when the twat looked back over at him he saw the urgent look that headed a warning. 

Ross, though, simply rolled his eyes. “Nah, I just meant, you must be the model.”

Matty swore he was slowly losing it, was he being serious?

Meanwhile it seemed that both girls had taken to just blanching at the massive muppet. “Sorry?”

George tutted, shaking his head as he finally righted himself, and put on a charming smile, “Ignore him, that one’s on me.” He admitted and was quick to continue further when his words showed no signs of reassurance, “I figured Matty had to have been speaking to someone, seeing as he’s nonstop on his phone.”

“Well, er- no, no model, just me.” Mouse replied almost sheepishly, then chuckled faintly, “Or maybe there is a model and he’s just not mentioned it.” She teased, earning a few laughs.

“As if.” Matty rolled his eyes, squeezing her arm as he somehow managed to tug her in even closer.

“And oi! You’re ten times fitter than any model Ned Flanders here could pull.” Adi said, putting her two cents in.

Mouse merely rolled her eyes, obviously used to her mate’s brashness, and Matty found himself agreeing with Adi before-

“Hang on, Ned Flanders? Bit harsh, ain’t it?”

It was either Ross or George that snorted, could’ve been Hann too actually, but Matty was too preoccupied in his bemusement to steal a glance away from a very obviously smirking Adi. 

“Nah, she’s pretty spot on there, mate.”

“No one asked.” Matty sniped back before pointing over at the girl. But before he could get another word in edgeways, Mouse was there, patting his chest softly.

“Ah, it’s alright. Could’ve been worse actually.” She smiled at him, tittering ever so slightly that he didn’t feel too disheartened by it, “And besides, Flanders was fit! Had abs and everything hidden under that jumper of his.” Mouse tried to comfort him, though it was immediately spat on by Ross’s next sentence.

“Not gonna find that here, love.”

He was just shy enough to escape Matty’s swiping hand, jumping away with a gleeful grin to hide behind Adam. The coward.

Matty didn’t find much sincerity in the rest of them as he turned to glance them over, the guys all snickering to themselves, whilst Adi gave Ross an appraising look accompanied by a mirthful grin. 

He was only soothed by the action Mouse had made, having hidden her face in his shoulder. He was so transfixed on it that he practically forgot that the rest of them were even still there, especially when she lifted her face up to flash him a happy smile.

“Abs are overrated anyway.” She whispered to him, her chin propped up on the jut of his collarbone.

His eyes danced between hers and he found himself smiling stupidly in return. It was then though, that they were interrupted, “So come on! Ask us a question then!”

Matty watched her blink and then look away, whilst he only wanted to rewind and stay there a moment longer. Instead, he found himself swallowing around the lump in his throat and following her move.

“Yeah, go on!” He heard himself say and was almost regretful when Mouse stepped away to switch their camera on, feeling the wind more forcefully now that she wasn’t shielding his side. But then she was grinning again, eyes twinkling as she peered over at him, quirking her head to direct him further into the frame.

“Alright rockstar, this had best be better than our last interview.”

And Matty could only grin as he shouldered in closer to the rest of the lads, his eyes never once leaving hers.

[formercarylshipper]

Thoughts on TBOC finale ***SPOILERS AHEAD***

I have to say I was curious when Norman repeatedly claimed that the finale is the best hour of TWD ever. But then watching S2, and the way it was written, the story, etc, i had my doubts. Then I watched the finale. In my opinion, it was not the best hour of TWD television. Not even close. Not even the best TWD finale. BUT, I do have to say that the location and the zombies were definitely unique and not something we've seen before, so kudos for that.

The best part of it was Carol. We already know that Melissa is a tremendous actress and she did not disappoint. I cried. The emotion in that final scene was so beautiful. And it felt like Carol's trauma around Sophia has been resolved in a way and I'm hoping that it allows Carol to finally start healing and move foward.

Can't say the same for Daryl. Maybe it was lost on me, which is completely possible. I saw a man who was ready to give up. Granted, he had just been through quite the beating by not just one, but 3 people. I don't imagine he felt amazing in that moment, so I get it. But also, I do feel like there was a bit of a "what's the point" moment. And then Isabelle shows up. I'm still not sure what she meant to Daryl but there she is stroking his face and telling him not to give up, to believe in hope and then telling him that he's not going to die in France like his grandfather did and leave his family behind. We know Daryl struggled with his grandfather's story in S1. In a way, it was very beautiful, her giving him hope since that what she represented. And Daryl is crying while staring softly up at her. Likely a combination of a few feelings I imagine. There was also a script leaked awhile back and A LOT got cut from this scene. It was supposed to show Daryl dealing with feelings of guilt around the deaths of Merle, Glenn and Beth. But we don't see that. Just a sweet moment between Daryl and "the love of his life".

I feel like, aside from Isabelle's apparition, she had a bigger presence in this episode. And that might just be my own interpretation. But the song with Laurent and Daryl i think had to do with Isabelle with the lyrics "you can't always get what you want, but you get what you need" suggesting that Daryl wanted a family with Isabelle and Laurent but that, in fact, Carol was what Daryl needed which lines up with what Norman said about the Carol being the person that he needs. Then Fallou leaving but then deciding to stay with this new woman that he's found romance with, was representative of the choice Daryl's felt with Isabelle and that Fallou got his happy ending, where Daryl didn't. I think that Isabelle showing up isn't necessarily a closure for Daryl and it's not necessarily wrapping up that story and that character. It's already been hinted to us that Daryl is going to continue to deal with his grief in S3. To me, it seems that Isabelle was more than just an acquaintance or "experiment". Was he in love with her? No, I don't think so. But I also don't think Daryl knew exactly what he felt. Since according to Norman, Daryl's never experienced that before. So he's probably trying to figure out how he feels about all of it.

Overall, the season didn't leave me wowed. It's called The Book Of Carol, but it just felt like Carol was a side kick to Daryl's story. And things just felt awkward. There's still so much missing between those two. Norman wants to make us think things are all perfect between them, but it's not coming out on the screen that way. Have Daryl and Carol changed too much to get back to what they were before? They don't feel like the BFF's they were in the flagship show. There's just...something missing.

Tbh, nothing i saw is giving me lots of excitement for S3. Time will tell.

[koskela-knights]

Finnish names in AW 2 - Answers

I decided to put all answers together in 1 post

OG post:

I was wondering if some of these Finnish versions of names found in YY and beyond are also actual names commonly used in Finnish and/or if they have (different) meanings in Finnish. Like I remember something about Kesä have smth to do with ice cream. Or maybe it really isn’t that deep but I’m curious nonetheless Alan Wake -> Alén Veikko Zane -> Seine Watery -> Huotari (Here I also wonder, did Watery already get mentioned in Alan Wake 1? I cant remember. If not, I wonder if they chose the Finnish name first and if coincidentally, they realized they it somewhat sounds like Watery) Barbara Jagger -> Baba Jakala

---

@thechibi

Water was mentioned in AW1! Pat Maine mentions it on the radio, that's where Moose Fest is and he talks about how it's a rival to DeerFest (which is of course, better!)

@omena-perkele

oh oh I have some answers, though rather minimal and meaningless, but answers nonetheless!!! all the Finnish names used in AW2 are actual names that have actual meanings or people who have them as names. I looked at how common these names are in Finland, tried to find meanings and areas they appear in. tbh I do think that the names were chosen primarily based on the way they sound to make them similar to the character's English names lol

Aleksi Kesä: this one is easy. Aleksi is just the Finnish equivalent of Alex, Kesä is literally the word for summer! it's also an actual surname, though incredibly rare (all sources saying there's currently only 22 people alive who have it).

Veikko Alén: I love how they chose to swap Alan's first and last names to make it easier to match phonetically in Finnish. Veikko means brother, which I think is interesting considering the character of Veikko Alén is played by Thomas Seine and Thomas means twin. Alén is a much more common surname than Kesä (654 people), but I could not find what it means. it seems to be most common in south and west Finland.

Seine: another very rare surname (28 people) and another one I could not find a meaning for... I swore there was a place called "Seinen saari" (isle of Seine) in a Finnish book I once read for school but I can't find anything about it online and I'd have to get my hands on the book somehow to check.. sadly I don't remember the title.

Huotari: wait, is Watery actually translated as Huotari? I don't remember seeing it other than the well and the name of the brothers. kinda embarrassing if I've completely missed that. also I do think it Watery was at least mentioned in AW1. anyway! Huotari is a pretty common surname (3767 people) most common in the Kainuu area. I don't live there or close to it but funny thing, I worked a summer job at a graveyard in eastern Finland and there were quite a few headstones with the name Huotari. Huotari means "gift of god"

Baba Jakala: this one is interesting to me, especially the first name. Baba is so rare that the only data on it shows that there has consistently been 0 or less than 5 people named that for the last century. so basically nobody is named that. Jakala is also another rare surname (25 people) that I could not find a meaning for. I do think that this name was chosen for her purely for it sounding similar to Baba Yaga.

idk why I went down this rabbit hole, it's 5am now lol

@thotpants

The association with ice cream is probably just from your unfortunate exposure to Finnblr. Jäätelökesä (ice cream summer) is a generic marketing term (lifted from an old song) that often gets used in association with the nightmare ice cream flavors we come up with.

My best guess for Seine is that they just couldn't come up with anything even resembling Zane and used the name of the French river. Unlike a lot of other exotoponyms in Finnish it's just used as-is since it conforms to Finnish vowel harmony.

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Thanks again people for adding your insights on the matter 👏🏽🙏🙏

Always feel free to add new comments

[valentinafoxr]

Illustrhater was good

I had some time to let my thoughts marinate and watched the episode again, and I would say we're off to a good start! Some things I liked or noticed:

What it is with Lila's notebooks in the opening scene. Is she writing a novel. Is all of this just a ploy to get clout on ao3

Love love LOVE Marinette's room and all the little details - her room has always been so cool, but I feel like it's elevated by the redesign. She has a Molly Ringwald-Teen Movie Bedroom-Windowsill now ❤

RE: The intro - I DO like that they kept the song! Would've been very jarring to have a new tune, but I feel like keeping the music wraps it up really nicely. Love the Adrinette cuteness and OUGH OUGH OUGH the shot with Gabriel in the background. Sinister, I love it. I won't lie, I WILL miss the shot that's now the LadyNoir fist bump and Adrinette kiss when it used to be Chat Noir going in for a kiss and then the two of them tumbling over each other, mostly because it used to be the essence of the Lovesquare and thus the show. I totally get though why they had to change it up -different premise with Adrinette in a relationship and all- and the way the still kept the switcheroo was nicely done.

on, and they kept the black cat in the intro. points for that.

Marinette being a disaster is so, so comforting to me. Yes, give us the statistics about Hawkmoth, order shrimp macarons, hide your face in your tiny purse girl, I love you!!!! And her cat ear slippers <3

I need a moment to gush about the new animation, because, DAMN. It's both the small details (the pattern and texture of Alya's glasses) and and the scenery (Paris actually looking like a populated city with a beautiful variety of both people and unique buildings????). Idk it's just really, really nice. The character models are mostly an upgrade and look a tad older while still keeping the original vibe. The expressions are also better, especially for the supporting cast. The lighting is gorgeous! AND THE AKUMATIZATIONS!!!! HELLO!!! THEY LOOK SO COOL

Adrien is a sad exception to my praise but I think the less we talk about it the faster we will all collectively get used to it lol

I also think the direction and camera work has gotten a lot better - the fighting scenes looked cool and we got interesting camera angles.

The integration of 2D animation is neat! The chibis are very cute and serve a purpose. I do hope they keep adding 2D elements and not just as illustrations as they used to do in former seasons. I mean, this is such a fun shot:

Storywise it was a decent episode! not much to say here tbh, I liked the DJ Wifi sideplot (and THEM overall, bestest couple).

Loooooved the trash collecting scene, reminded me of Gang of Secrets Ladynoir after their break-ups. I need them to talk/gossip to each other about their relationship(s) in every episode hehe. I do miss flirty Ladynoir but seeing them again is auauauuaghhh. Adrien seeing Ladybug out and about and he's smiling!!!!!!!!!! I love Ladynoir so much

We didn't get much about Adrien's situation from this (apart from the fact that he's allowed to leave the house lol) but the sadness in his eyes…. and him taking the blame for Adrinette's communication issues…. my sweet, sweet boy 🙁

Referring back to this post - yeah, that's Lila/Cerise/Iris in the café, drinking a diabolo menthe (Diabolo -> diabolos in Greek: slanderous, libellous -> Girliepop is ready to stir up things). She's gonna be wherever Marinette goes, causing trouble, I assume.

things I'm curious about:

the timeline: is it still summer vacation? I would assume so, since Marinette and Alya have yet another sleepover and they're meeting the boys in the morning (?). School probably hasn't started yet this season.

Kagami and Marinette: Their (very, very brief) interaction seemed normal. I expected Kagami to be conflicted due to their conversation in the London Special, tbh, but then again, it was a very brief interaction. We'll see.

Carapace using shelter twice in one battle: Did all heroes "grow up"? Did it happen on-screen in episode 1 or should we just assume they all have unlimited powers?

the Kwagatama: I mean, we don't need to talk about the obvious implication (memory loss, Tales-of-LB-and-CN-theory), but I'm kinda wondering about other possible scenarios this may lead to.

And oh. The saved cat got an animation upgrade. Can’t wait to see Baby August in the new animation style lol