#(and change things just enough for mal to be there too)

[greensaplinggrace]

in my time travel au alina convinces the materialki to make the darkling a kefta in her colors while she’s staying at the little palace and gifts it to him the same way he did her

[whatdidtheydotomygirljinx]

Jinx just never really liked Vander that much.

One of the things that, to me, seemed like a main theme in Jinx's arc in season 1 was the contrast between her two families, and how her switch from Vander's daughter to Silco's drastically changes the way her personality takes shape.

And I hate that the fandom, and now the show, too, has reduced Silco to an unhealthy influence in Jinx's life, pushing her towards her "bad" side (being Jinx) when, for all his flaws... he gives her a better childhood than she ever had with Vander. The first three episodes of the first season, to me, when I watched them, illustrate quite clearly that Powder feels unhappy in her family life. She is the most mal-adjusted of Vander's kids. Her older brother constantly berates her, and it's quite clearly having a big effect on her self-image. She later takes up the Jinx name and persona once she feels like she has become irredeemable as a person. Her other brother never defends her. Vi is the only one who is there for her, and they care for each other, but at the same time you can see there's still a little insecurity in their relationship. Vi is worried that maybe Powder is indeed too weak, and Powder worries that maybe Vi does indeed see her as a Jinx like her brother does.

And when it comes to Vander... he's just not really all that present in her life. And I don't blame him, the man has four kids to take care of, on top of keeping things running in the Undercity. It's clearly not his intention. But it doesn't change the fact that he's not there for Powder, not as much as she needs. To me, when I watched the first season, it seemed like Vander was a figure that felt far away to Powder, someone that she admired but also feared being completely herself around, and someone that she ultimately wished to be closer to than she actually was. It's worth mentioning that Jinx never says his name post time skip, and he is not a hallucination for her, not until Vi brings him up in the finale. Hell, Claggor is somehow a hallucination for her and he never even speaks. Vander was just not an influential figure in Jinx's life.

I always found the scene at the end of ep3 of s1 fascinating, because Powder never once mourns Vander. She never once cries for him and never once says his name. When she sees his dead body, she becomes shocked and starts crying, but it's not actually what breaks her. What breaks her is Vi's rejection. Had it just been that she accidentally caused the deaths of her brothers and adoptive father, she would not have crumbled mentally. It's Vi's rejection that destroys her. Now, of course, a little girl that cares more about her sister's affection towards her than the lives of her family members is kinda messed up, but that's what makes her character interesting. And we can see that that little girl doesn't go anywhere, as Jinx displays the exact same one-mindness about her sister. Because Jinx and Powder were never really that different, after all.

She is quite clearly placed with her back to Vander's body, that she never turns to, barely looks at, only enough to recognize him and see he's dead, and never says the name of. She's turned towards Vi, calling for Vi, crying because of Vi, and no one else. Heck, Vi had just been crying over his body a few moment ago. Vi is clearly distraught over his death. Vi is devastated, she literally punches her sister and curses her in the exact worst possible way she can, in the way she know it will hurt her sister the most. But Powder... she just honestly dgaf.

So to then hear Jinx say this line in season 2...

...is just straight up jarring. I was pulled out of the story when I heard this. This is Jinx saying this to Vi. This kinda makes it seem like it was Jinx who was most attached to Vander, or at least that she was just as attached to him as Vi was. Which is just not how things seemed in the story at literally any point until this one. And then season 2 continues this way, and somehow makes Jinx seem like the closest daughter to Vander. Flipping Warwick literally acts more attached to Jinx than Vander ever did to Powder. Like literally. Season 1 clearly sets up that Vi is the favorite daughter, and then they just... flip it?? Warwick cares more for Jinx and responds better to her than to Vi. It's actually insane. It's true they sanitized Jinx's character to hell and back this season, but this is a straight-up rewrite. I can't wrap my mind around why they did this. Plus, the entirety of act 2 they set up this weird and pointless arc of Jinx rekindling her relationship with Vander or something... and like literally her story was genuinely never about that.

(This COULD have been Vi's story. And that might have actually been cool, and made sense. Maybe Vi is the one who finds him, and she is the one who helps him calm down. And then she brings Jinx, and maybe Jinx is terrified because she was never that close to Vander, and then she literally killed him, so seeing him again is the last thing she wants. Maybe VI is the one who tells Jinx that "he was your dad, too", which would make A LOT more sense, and maybe that's the first time that Jinx thinks that oh, yeah, he was... And then maybe they have a cute moment where Vander forgives her. Or maybe she sees the state he's in right now and loses it completely. Or maybe they look at each other and they both see the monster each of them has become. And then maybe Vi looks down at the enforcer uniform she's wearing, and, privately, sees it too. Idk. The things we could have had.)

Silco was actually a good dad to Jinx, in all the ways that Vander wasn't. He gives her all the attention that she never had before. He not only listens to her, but actively asks for her side of the story. He never insults her, and he defends her against Sevika. He trusts her and gives her opportunities to prove she's capable. She goes from being one of four siblings, and getting lost in the shuffle and often ending up feeling forgotten and alone, to being the most important child, always taken into consideration and almost put on a pedestal by her dad (this, like, has to have cured some inner wounds, i think).

Silco understands Jinx better than any other character in the show, and I'm genuinely sad that we didn't get to see any flashback of Jinx growing up with him. Because their relationship was so unique, and so integral to Jinx's character and to the rest of the story, that the fact that we never get to see any other glimpse into their bond is just...

As a final note, I'd also like to add that I dislike when people say that Silco "groomed" Jinx. I think a much more realistic analysis is that he enabled her. And as for all the times he tells Jinx that Vi "betrayed her", that's just a reflection of his own trauma, and also because he fears that if Jinx knew Vi was alive, she would go back to her and leave him (which, considering what goes down in the s1 finale, not an unfounded fear). It's wrong that he does that, but it's not out of malicious intent (also tbh Jinx never really seems to believe him anyway).

And for all the people who say that Silco "turned Jinx into a terrorist" (dumbest people in this fandom fr, im sorry), that's just straight up not true. Powder was already like that. That is quite literally why Silco adopts her. Because he sees that she's like him. Silco would not have taken Powder in if he thought she was just a cute, innocent kid who was orphaned (to, what, raise her for years so that, MAYBE when she's older, she MIGHT be useful to him? when they meet he doesn't know she's the one that caused the explosion, he just knows that she's been abandoned by Vi). This is the kid who thought playing around with explosives was a fun hobby. This is the kid who giggled at the thought of hurting others. This is the kid who already suffered from explosive emotions. This is the kid who saw her father and her brothers dead, because of her, and all she cared about was whether her sister was mad at her because of it. This is the kid who throws herself at the first person she sees, someone who her sister hates, who is the cause of all this destruction, and with an anger that shocks most viewers, declares that Vi is not her sister anymore. She is livid in that one moment.

Powder already had it in her from the beginning. And it's also ok to like a character (and to write one) even if they are not 100% morally pure in every single way under the sun, cause that is quite literally what stories are for.

[earthnashes]

Hello there! If I may ask about your oc Sakura, how did you go about conceptualizing her? Was there any characters or media that inspired her design? How did her character change to what it is now? Apologies for this many questions, feel free to choose just one when you have time; love your work!

Hello! You may indeed ask about my baby! 🥹

So for context, Feathers and Flowers' birthing concept was about a girl summoning a demon because she was lonely but too shy to make her own friends, so she concludes summoning a demon would somehow be easier. In that iteration of the story, Sakura was meant to be a side character; a friend to the main characters that acted as the ultimate foil to basically everyone around her. She combated Kaela's crippling anxiety by being confident and overwhelmingly outgoing, contrasted Evangeline's bossy, bitchy attitude with being kind and friendly, and be the opposite of Mal's stoic, silent character with being expressive and chatty. I also needed a character that could conveniently know enough about niche media to reasonably be able to help Kaela summon her demon in the first place, so I ended up making her a huge geek: she loved anime, video games, and had knowledge on obscure things... including occult summonings xD

So I worked off that idea to form her appearance. Again her core direction was to be a foil to all of the main cast: Kaela was short and soft. Evangeline was tall and thin. Mal was tal and hard. I wanted Sakura to be the biggest character, so she originally started started out compact and wide. Her face was what I started with: I wanted her to look somewhat like an anime character, and her inspiration was based off of the older episodes of Dragonball, Pokemon, Tenchi Muyo, Ranma, Inuyasha. I basically wanted her to have Goku vibes (his wide dark eyes, his big smile, his open and easy personality) but with Inuyasha's hairstyle (she originally had long hair).

But then the story changed; it wasn't about a demon being summoned in a silly slice-of-life story but a Spirit getting lost in a magical modern era, still very much slice of life.

That ultimately shifted Sakura's design into something more athletic; football specifically. I wanted her to keep her dorky traits but pair it with the popular star athlete trope, so she became leaner, taller, and more "top heavy". She also became more oblivious; she remained sweet and friendly and outgoing, but in turn she didn't understand when someone liked her. In fact she was later canonized to be asexual originally didn't have romance planned for her character.

Fastforward to now: the story of F&F has changed again. While the core remains mostly the same (found family), it ironically shifted into something much closer to one of the earlier concepts of the story; something more serious and not slice of life, something that focuses more on the good and bad of a world instead of being predominantly lighthearted. So with that change the characters had to get a tune-up to their characterizations. Sakura received the biggest change, I think.

Her core remains true: she's relentlessly kind, expressive, a dork. But I decided to make that her biggest strength and her biggest flaw, as well as making her loving personality be conflicted by how the world views her by changing her appearance. That's how we get current Sakura: she's kind, she's loving, she wants to help others. But people think she's a threat, a ticking timebomb, because of what she is. So her once open smile is now more manufactured, a wall to protect herself, a farce to try and make herself look less like a threat. She's now a pushover; she can't establish her boundaries without it being misinterpreted as being aggressive, so her coping mechanism is to grin and bear it. She can't get visiblt upset or angry, so she has to fight for calm to have even the smallest chance of being listened to. She's "nice" because it's all she's allowed to be.

Hence her appearance change! She is now the largest character in the main roster, the physically strongest. Her smile is now "tainted" by sabre teeth she can't hide, her size contradicts her gentle nature.

It's late for me so I'm sure I forgot a few things but that's what I got for now! If you're interested I could show older concept work of Sakura to illustrate how she looked then vs how she looks now too. But ye! Thank you so much for asking about my character! 🥹🙏

[ewingstan]

I do wonder how much the perception of cape culture in the fandom would have changed if Wildbow hadn’t made the story so Brockton Bay centric.

The story of Worm (and Ward to an extent) has alluded to the fact that Brockton Bay is notably an exception when it comes to cape violence and brutality, with Taylor shocked that a Ward she met had 3 fights in 6 months. And how several Wards and Rime had no idea what she was talking about in regard to “counting coup”.

We see this with Victoria too, when she’s shocked about the Majors not seeing any action in 6 years and Tristan being overwhelmed with the amount of violence in the Fallen Raid despite being a hero for a few years himself. Foil also mentions how most of her career was really calm until March would occasionally poke her nose in things.

Mal posted some Ward updates! While I understand her pov, I do disagree with her:ilebow has also stressed, pre-Ward, that Brockton Bay was not indicative of the wider cape scene as a whole but rather a domino of things going wrong due to outside factors.

If Wildbow had extended interludes to show the dynamics of other, average, cape cities or had Taylor be in a city where things were so much calmer that she found it disturbing… well, it’s hard to say how things would change, but I think it would have made it far more clear that Taylor and Victoria’s life experience should not be applied across the board.

Or maybe nothing would have changed. Just spitballing an idea based on your let’s read so far.

Brockton Bay may be exceptional to an extent. But maybe just in the sense that it had so much happen to it before it was abandoned. Madison and Ellisburg only needed one bad day. Several countries in Worm were just straight-up destroyed.

The Bay may have been a notably large hub of nazi capes. But they were part of an internationally-connected network of capes with similar agendas. Hell, the Fallen mostly operated outside of Brockton Bay. Most of the exceptionally violent groups like the Fallen, the Slaughterhouse Nine, Heartbreaker, the Teeth, etc. were roaming problems. Yes, Brockton was unique in that it was hit by all of them, but the world was full of those types of groups. There were similar groups of enough importance on a world stage to get an invite to the cauldron meetings that we only get the barest details of.

But the most important thing is that the low-level fights Victoria's specifically nostalgic for was itself always worse than she's remembering. It wasn't a bunch of kooky characters clashing with straightmen heroes. It was a bunch of very desperate people trying to survive in a system that found them either expendable or better off dead. Even without all the specific things that hit Brockton Bay, Rachel probably would've ended up in the birdcage. Victoria would've kept relying on Amy to fix up the crooks she broke, assuming she never ended up accidentally killing someone. Both of them would continue living under the crushing responsibility and isolation that came with their cape personas. Vista would've ended up as maladjusted as a marketable celebrity child soldier would always end up being. People like Dinah and Lisa would keep being hunted for their skills by more powerful forces. The Taylors of the world would keep getting bullied, the Mr. Gladlys would keep looking away. The rot would be same.

[cosmal]

cake — send me in a character and a prompt and i’ll write you a blurb!

sirius black + showering together for the first time? maybe?? you’re definitely super shy and he softens you up with compliments and washes your hair (and he lets you was his)

suds

summary you and sirius have your first shower togehter

content sirius black x fem!reader

note mal ur so real for this

You stand behind the curtain to Sirius's shower, still in your underwear. He waits on the other side, warming up the water for you. He'd been fine with being the first to get undressed and you really appreciate him for it.

You've been naked around each other enough times for you not to be as nervous as you'd been the first time. You've never showered with him and you're thankful you're doing it before you take it further eventually.

"You coming, baby?" he asks gently, just loud enough so he's heard over the splash of water.

You blink, eyes heavy, head even worse. Despite the nerves, you really want to get under the warm water. You take off your bra and step out of your undies and feel a little better seeing yours piled up next to his boxers. Yours blue next to his grey. It's strangely calming.

You nudge the curtain with your shoulder, hands too busy crossed over your chest, folded in on yourself when Sirius opens it up to let you in.

"Darling," Sirius says, more than elated to see you. He keeps it hidden, voice soft and gentle. He can't hide it entirely too well with his little smile and sparkling eyes. "C'mere," he says, arms open and glittery, "you'll get all cold."

Sirius ushers you under the stream and not once has he stopped looking at your face. It relaxes you more than it should and you feel almost bad about it. Sirius is allowed to look at you, you like it when he does because he always looks like he's about to crumble. You don't make it easier with your hands tucked under your armpits, but you think Sirius knows you'd rather him not look down. He knows how to pace things.

Sirius is the most patient person you know and you love him for it.

"Sorry, I took so long," you say despite yourself. You share the stream with him, almost chest to chest. Your arm nudges his chest and you almost want to apologise but you can hear his response already.

“Don’t worry about it,” he says as he touches your shoulder. His fingers drip water in places that are still half dry and you shiver. He touches you as soft as you'd expect, maybe worse. Gentle fingers against gooseflesh skin.

There's a silence. Only running water and your breathing. Sirius's feet as they squeak against the tile below the both of you when he moves. You stay still and really don't know what to say. How much does someone's shower routine change when you have to reach around the other person's hip to grab your soap? Should you ask him to move?

"Sirius," you say. You're so close you wouldn't be surprised if he felt it against his dewy cheek. "I'm so nervous."

His bottom lips juts out and despite yourself, you want to kiss it. All slippery, kind kisses that feel warmer than the water. "It's okay. You're okay."

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't be," you apologise.

"It's just me, yeah?" he says. You watch the water that sprays on his shoulder as it pushes his hair down and into his collarbone. He's so pretty and you're entirely silly.

You reach out to touch him and are hesitant with it. Your hand stops before you reach him.

"You can touch me lovely." You hate that he knows what you're thinking, and you hate yourself more for thinking it in the first place. You're not assuming, you shouldn't be, Sirius has his own boundaries. But, he's your boyfriend - you can touch him. Especially in the shower. It leaves no room for modesty.

"Yeah," you say, a little breathless, a lot giddy.

You reach out and trace his tattoos. Down the stem of a pretty, inky flower - the points of a group of stars. Sirius grabs you by the hips as you do so and it startles you how much you like it. How much you want him to pull you closer.

He tucks his head down to watch you with the prettiest smile he's ever given you. He's enraptured. It melts his silly little heart to watch himself make you so calm.

"Can I wash your hair, baby?" he asks, selfishly he might add.

You look back at him, embarrassed at your glossed-over eyes and the nibbled lip you'd tucked between your teeth. "Would you want to do that?"

Sirius seems like he's been burned. His eyes widen and he squeezes you harder by the hips. "Of course, I would," he laughs.

You reach up and hold him by the cheeks. Water rushes down your hands and your elbows into heavier streams that point towards your thighs. "Can I wash yours first?" you ask and push it behind his ears in soaked strands.

"Yeah?" he says, more excited than you're expecting.

You stare into his eyes, soft blue until it bleeds out into a sparkling grey that makes you feel weak. His heavy eyelashes that clump up under the water that drips from his hair. "Yeah," you smile.

He grins back, much worse than yours, and reaches down for your shampoo to hand to you. "Be gentle, yeah?"

You roll your eyes and squeeze a bunch into your open palm. He stares at you as you work it through his hair and you squirm under his gaze. You know he's aware of his effect on you. He smiles and has to bite it back. You stare at his scalp and pretend you're too busy to look him in the eye.

"Stop staring at me," you say, shy laughter hot in your throat.

He leans his cheek on your arm where you've got it next to his head. "I don't think I will," he smiles, the chub of his cheek slips against your skin as he goes.

"Stop," you say and don't mean It

"No," he says seriously. "No, I'll only stop when you stop being so fucking gorgeous."

"Sirius."

"Really," he laughs now.

"No."

"You're fucking amazing." He's so genuine about it, you wish you weren't trapped in your tiny studio apartment shower.

"Tilt your head back," you say instead of what you want to. Something like Sirius, if you don't stop I'm going to pass out right here in the shower.

"Beautiful."

You tilt his head under the water before he can wax poetic any longer. He laughs and his mouth fills with water. He splutters and scrunches his eyes shut, face bright with boyish glee. You think he might spit it out at you but he lets it dribble out and down his chin - much to your delight. It's daunting how pretty he looks as he does it. Suddy face and hair in his eyes.

"All right," he says, pushing his hair from his face. "Turn around, it's my go."

"Be gentle, please, Sirius," you say, and tilt your head up.

Sirius groans from the back of his throat. "God, honey, when you say it like that, I'd be an ass not to, huh?"

[anonymousewrites]

Apple of My Eye Chapter Six

Harry Hook x Child of Snow White! Reader

Chapter Six: I'm Wishing

Summary: (Y/N) wants to find their love, and other loves are on the rocks.

A few months later…

            “So, for Cotillion, I’m thinking…dramatic,” said Evie, looking at (Y/N). She hummed as she circled (Y/N) on the pedestal. “Yes. Red instead of mostly blue, switch things up. Gold detailing…Yes. An elegant look with a bit of drama. What do you think?”

            “I think you always have the best concepts,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            “I need something that screams, ‘I’m here, look at me,’ ” said Evie dramatically.

            “You’re outdoing yourself for Cotillion,” said (Y/N), chuckling.

            Evie smiled. “Business has been good since the Coronation, but this is my biggest event so far. My designs have to be impeccable.”

            “And they will be,” said (Y/N). “You’re an amazing designer.”

            “And you’re an amazing consultant. I wouldn’t have half the contracts I did if you didn’t get so many royals and nobles in other kingdoms to request my work.” Evie smirked. “Competition for me means they raise the price without me having to.”

            “If they have the money to throw around, take it,” teased (Y/N).

            Evie had created an amazing design business, and with the connections Doug and (Y/N) had, they had been able to help her grow. Now, she had a line of customers out for weeks of events and a steady flow of income. Cotillion was the next grand event and the largest since Coronation since Mal would be announced to be an official Lady of the Court. Due to the increase in demand for outfits, (Y/N) was lucky to get in with Evie before she ran out of appointments (and time). However, they were her friend, so that gave them a helpful in.

            “But you get a discount,” said Evie.

            “Evie, I am happy to pay you—”

            “Nope,” said Evie. “Best friends do each other favors. I give you clothes, you look fabulous and show them off for me.”

            “You have Mal for that, too,” said (Y/N), grinning.

            “You two have different styles,” said Evie. She paused. “And I suppose I could use Doug, but he just doesn’t have your charisma.”

            (Y/N) giggled at the picture in their head. Doug would do anything for his girlfriend and had been her model hundreds of times by now, but it was true that they and Mal modelled a bit better than he did due to their confidence and attitude. (Doug pouted when Evie told him, but she gave him a kiss and he recovered well enough). When Doug had been a model, he had quickly decided all the eyes on him weren’t his thing. He just needed Evie to look at him with love—and she sure did.

            Evie held up swatches to (Y/N) and looked in the mirror, humming as she decided on the color and precise fabric. “I have your measurements already, and I have patterns, so I will have the fitting ready in a few days.”

            “You’re so dependable,” said (Y/N).

            Evie let out an exhausted sigh. “I try.” She stepped back, made a few notes in her sketchbook, and let (Y/N) step down from the podium.

            Doug opened the door to the studio where Evie set up shop. “Evie, you ready for lunch?”

            Evie brightened as she closed her sketchbook. “I am.” She glanced at (Y/N). “I’ll see you later for dinner?”

            “Of course. Have fun on your date~” (Y/N) waved playfully as Evie and Doug took each other’s hands and walked out of the room.

            (Y/N) left after them, locking the studio with their copy of the key. They walked out of Auradon Prep onto the grounds, smiling as they passed Mal and Ben. They waved, and the pair waved back from where they were escaping paparazzi and going to another diplomatic luncheon. Poor Mal gave a tired smile and held Ben’s hand tightly. (Y/N) smiled as they watched. At least Mal and her friends and Ben to support her through the change from VK to almost Lady of the Court. It wasn’t easy. And love made things easier.

            “(Y/N),” said Carlos, running up to (Y/N). “Can I have some help?”

            Speaking of love. “With Jane?” said (Y/N) knowingly.

            Carlos turned pink. “Is it that obvious?”

            “To everyone except you two,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            “I want to ask her to Cotillion,” said Carlos. “But I don’t know how.”

            “Be direct,” said (Y/N). “Jane is as oblivious as you are—”

            “Hey.”

            “—so you need to say what you mean outright,” said (Y/N). They laughed. “She’s also so busy right now that she has barely any bandwidth to think of subtext. Make sure she knows what you mean.”

            “But what if she rejects me?” said Carlos.

            “Then she does. But would you rather be true to your heart or not?” said (Y/N).

            “…I want to be true,” said Carlos.

            “Good,” said (Y/N). They smirked. “Besides, I think she’ll say yes.”

            Carlos’s smile widened. “You think so?”

            “Yeah,” said (Y/N).

            “Thanks, (Y/N),” said Carlos, grinning.

            “No problem,” said (Y/N). They were there to help. They wanted their friends to find love. Love was an incredible thing. Everyone deserved to experience it

l

            “Do you like it?” said Evie, pinning the skirts of the dress.

            “I love it,” said (Y/N), smiling at the dress in the mirror. Evie hadn’t finished the detailing or tailoring quite yet, but the basis and major work was finished. (Y/N) was ecstatic. “It’s beautiful, Evie.”

            “You’re the beautiful one,” said Evie, smiling. She grinned in the mirror. “Now, what I want to know is…has anyone asked you to Cotillion?”

            “No,” laughed (Y/N), shaking their head.

            “Hm, have you asked anyone?” asked Evie.

            “Still a no, Evie,” said (Y/N). “I’d tell you if there was someone I was interested in.”

            Evie tutted. “I hope so, it’s my duty as your best friend to know these things.”

      ��     (Y/N) chuckled, but their smile felt a little heavier. “I still haven’t felt a spark with anyone, Evie. I don’t know.”

            “Hey.” Evie put her hands on (Y/N)’s shoulders. “There are people outside of Auradon Prep. Not everyone in the kingdom comes here for school. You’ll meet someone eventually. If anyone is going to find True Love, it’s you.” She smiled.

            “I hope so,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            “And until then, you have us, your friends, and your parents, your family,” said Evie. She hugged her friend. “And we love you, too.”

            (Y/N) laughed and hugged Evie back. “I know.”

l

            (Y/N) walked through the grounds of Auradon Prep, humming as they went. They didn’t really care where they were going; they just wanted to think. They knew they didn’t need love. They were fortunate enough to have a good life, good friends, good family, everything.

            However, (Y/N) wanted to find True Love. They watched their friends begin to find it, and (Y/N) wanted to feel that lightness, that warmth in their heart that their parents had always told them about.

            (Y/N) entered a clearing in the woods and gazed at the well sitting in the middle of it. They smiled slightly and walked to it. They sat down on the edge and gazed down. Their reflection peered back up at them, and they hummed.

            They remembered some old, playful advice their mother gave them. An older superstition—

(Y/N) “Make a wish into the wall, That’s all you have to do, And if you hear it echoing, Your wish will soon come true.”

            (Y/N) leaned over the well. With the sun shining down on them, they really fit the fairytale aesthetic in their red skirt, white blouse, and blue corset top. A yellow bow held their hair back. (Y/N) hummed and began their song.

(Y/N) “I’m wishing.” (Echo) “I’m wishing.” (Y/N) “For the one I love, To find me.” (Echo) “To find me.” (Y/N) “Today.” (Echo) “Today.”

            (Y/N) sighed and leaned back, looking up at the sky.

(Y/N) “I’m hoping.” (Echo) “I’m hoping.” (Y/N) “And I’m dreaming of, The fun things.” (Echo) “The fun things.” (Y/N) “They’ll say.” (Echo) “They’ll say.”

            (Y/N) hopped off the side of the well and danced around it, singing the whole time.

(Y/N) “Ha ha ha ha ha.” (Echo) “Ha ha ha ha ha.” (Y/N) “Ha ha ha ha ha.” (Echo) “Ha ha ha ha ha.” (Y/N) “Ha ha ha ha ha.” (Echo) “Ha ha ha ha ha.” ((Y/N) and Echo) “Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.”

            (Y/N) stopped, leaning out over the well.

(Y/N) “I’m wishing.” (Echo) “I’m wishing.” (Y/N) “For the one I love, To find me.” (Echo) “To find me.” (Y/N) “Today.” (Echo) “Today.”

            The echo hovered in the air, and (Y/N) sighed as it petered out.

            “I’m wishing…” To find love.

l

            “(Y/N)!” Evie burst through their dorm door, and (Y/N) was glad Lizzie was out studying so she wouldn’t get freaked out. “Mal went back to the Isle.”

            “What?!” (Y/N) stood from their bed in alarm.

            Evie covered her mouth, nearly crying. “She’s gone.” She held up a letter and a familiar ring. “I don’t know what to do—I can’t believe she left—Why would she…?”

            “Hey, hey.” (Y/N) took Evie’s hands. “Let’s talk to the others, to Ben. We can figure out what to do. We can find out if Mal is alright, if she needs help, if this was a mistake, everything. Okay? We’ll help her, Evie. Together.”

            Evie let out a shaky breath. “Okay. Alright.”

l

            Glancing up from his deskwork, Ben smiled. “Evie, (Y/N).” He was glad that after such a stressful day he could see at least a few friendly faces. “Come on in.” His face fell as he saw their expressions.

            (Y/N) closed the door tightly as Evie stepped forward.

            “Mal’s gone back to the Isle,” said Evie. Ben’s eyes widened. She held out the letter, and Ben took it. “Ben…” She held out the ring.

            Ben’s voice quivered as he took it and read the letter. “ ‘I am so sorry…’ ” He crumbled it in his hand. “This is my fault,” he said. “This is my fault! I blew it. She’s been under so much pressure lately, and instead of being understanding, I just went all beast on her.” He straightened. “I have to go there and apologize. I have to go there and beg her to come back.”

            “You’ll never find her,” said Evie.

            “We have to try,” said (Y/N). “She deserves to know that we’re all here to help her if she comes back.” None of them had helped her like they should have. No one had seen just how badly she was coping with the pressure and how much she needed support. (Y/N) owed it to their friend to help her.

            “But you need to know the Isle and how it works, and—I have to go with you,” realized Evie.

            “Yes!” Ben paused. “I mean…Are you sure?”

            “Yeah.” Evie nodded firmly, bravely. “She’s my best friend. And we’ll bring the boys, too. There’s safety in numbers, and none of us are really too popular over there right now.”

            “Thank you,” said Ben.

            “But let’s get one thing straight,” said Evie. “You have to promise me that I won’t get stuck there again.”

            “Never,” said (Y/N). “We’d never leave you behind.”

            “I promise,” said Ben.

            “Alright,” said Evie, nodding.

            “And let’s get another thing straight,” said (Y/N). Ben and Evie looked at them. “I’m coming, too.”

            “What—No,” said Ben.

            “Mal’s my friend, too,” said (Y/N).

            “Okay,” said Evie. She smirked. “But neither of you are going dressed like that.”

Taglist:

@neenieweenie

@hampterfae

@american-idiot-jpg

@lunalixya

@roo024

@unholycheesesnack

@paastaboi

@lbee13

@rory-cakes

@theeghosted

@newttheglue250

[the-unconquered-queen]

The thing about Aerin and MC in this book, even if you’re not pursuing him…

Tyril, Nia, Imtura, and Mal have had a hell of a year. If you don’t have the inspiration skill to give a good speech, Mal makes it clear that he doesn’t think MC could understand what they all went through, implying that MC had it easy because they were just asleep.

But that doesn’t mean that MC isn’t facing their own challenges in the fallout. Shadow Realm capture aside, they’ve just come back to the Light Realm to find that they missed out on an entire year of their life. Meanwhile, everyone else moved on, doing their own thing. They’ve all changed, blatantly so, but MC still feels the same. MC has to feel like life just went on without them, and quite frankly, the LIs aren’t helping.

Now, take Aerin, who’s spent that same year locked up in a cell, with (seemingly) no visitors and no information… you can see how he’d be the one who could understand MC’s situation best, since his life was basically put on pause while everyone else’s continued, too. They’re both playing catch up.

And if you add in the fact that no one cared enough to regularly make time for Aerin and the fact that MC’s friends gave up on them after, what? A month? Less? Well, there’s clearly some kinship there, whether they like it or not.

[prettynice8]

Kinkmas Day 11: Body marking

Pairing: Yuta Okkotsu x male reader

This guy

Warnings: Kissing, no actual sexy times, in public kind of, very queer reader if yk yk I can say that, you can't but I can, body marking DUH

Word count: 1447

It was a normal day at school, teachers talked about random shit, well teacher, napping in class, training, that one weird emo guy with the chef ass looking outfit staring at you, just girly things.

Yeah, that's weird, you always see that kid staring at you, and it's not like some loser staring at you, it's Yuta Okkotsu, the it girl of this school. Some say he'll surpass Gojo, a special grade in only second year, and you two have only talked a handful of times. So why the fuck would he care about you.

Now some may say that he's looking at something else, but this happens too often to be just that. To be fair, he isn't staring at you with mal intent, or like he's staring into your very soul, just quick little glances, but like a lot.

You think it's a little weird but never give it more thought than that, well that's actually not true at all. You wonder about it quite often actually. Like why is this hot, emo, country crippling guy staring at you so much.

He's also always around when you're training with students, which is rare because you're too delicate to get your hands dirty, but like he's rarely if ever around when other kids are practicing.

Speaking of which, you are sitting down in the grass, watching the first years battle it out with Maki and Panda when, speaking of the devil, Yuta finally makes his move and sits by you.

"Hi," he greeted, a light smile on his lips.

"Hello," You greeted him, smiling back at him as well. It's silent for a while after that, you not really knowing how to talk to someone on such a high pedestal such as him, and he's socially awkward. The silence is finally broken when he gains the courage to speak.

"So, what do you think of the fight?" He asked, clearly uncomfortable.

"I don't really care, I'm only here because Nobara and I were supposed to get coffee after her training." You replied.

"Why aren't you out there?" He asked yet another question, wanting the conversation to keep on going.

"And ruin my hair. I would also have to change my clothes, then change them back, and fight," You droned on, "I mean sure Megumi and Yuji are kinda hot, that might be a good enough reason but not today." You finished flatly.

Yuta was shocked when you said those two were hot, well not that much. He kind of expected you were gay by the way you walked, talked, did everything. Good for him, now he knows for sure.

"And then I could chip a nail which is just super incon-"

"Wait, you're gay?" He cut you off, you look at him like he's the dumbest person on earth, which he kind of is right now.

"DUH!" You shout, all the people training stop, Megumi mid punch from Panda's stomach, at your sudden outburst.

"What was that for?!" Nobara shouted back,

"Well, you see-" you cut him off now, "He asked if I was gay." You said nonchalantly.

Yuji, Megumi, Nobara, Panda, and Maki all give Yuta the same look you did, then they erupt into laughter.

"He might as well have a light up rainbow sign." Yuji said in between bursts of laughter.

"Did you really not know?" Megumi asked, even sneaking in a chuckle or two.

"I-I-I don't know." He stuttered, a little embarrassed having everyone laugh at him. You put your hand on his shoulder, so you don't talk over onto the ground, instantly causing blush to form on his cheeks.

"It's ok Yuta, not all of us can pick up on such clues, unless those clues are ramming into you like a fire truck." Nobara said, causing everyone to laugh more. Yuta starts to get very nervous and almost gets up and walks away, until he sees you genuinely smiling at him.

"Don't worry about it, the important thing is that I'm open for business for you." You stated, the laughter carrying on into your comment, Yuji and Nobara are actually lying on the ground from hilarity. "But be quick, who knows how long it is before I settle with those two." gesturing over to Yuji and Megumi.

Yuji blows a kiss at you, while Megumi looks away, blush creeping onto his face. It's at this point when Yuta starts to laugh too, shocking everyone, but the infectiousness of his laughter bleeds onto everyone else, causing another outburst.

After a while of pointless conversation that doesn't progress the plot, you and Nobara finally go to get coffee. After you two get your drinks and try each other out, you both find a seat and begin to talk.

"That Yuta guy definitely likes you." She stated, like it's some casual thing that everyone knows.

"No, he doesn't, today was like the first day he's actually come to me." You spoke. "Though he does look at me an awful lot."

"You think." She stated bluntly. "Do you like him?"

"I mean I don't know about dating him, but I would totally suck his dick." You answered, you both shared a good laugh from your reply too.

You both make your way to the dorms, saying your goodbyes and exiting into your own respective rooms. It was on your way when you saw Yuta.

"Hiiii!" You hollered, waving your hand at him, much more comfortable now with him. He waves back,

"Hi," he said, walking up to you. You two stop in the middle of the hallway.

"Where have you been?" You asked.

"In my dorm, I came out to see if I could get in a good training session." He answered, "Wanna join?"

"Absolutely not." You stated bluntly.

"Well, it was worth a try." He said, looking a little dejected that you turned him down so quickly, but it wasn't like a date or anything and he half expected you to say no, and then an idea pops into his head.

"Would you like to do something else?" He asked, smiling that sweet innocent smile.

"What were you thinking?" You asked back. He answers by pulling you into a tight broom closet, locking the door behind him, and then pushing you into the wall and kissing you. This isn't exactly what masterminds are made of but not a terrible idea.

You were more surprised about the insane speed in which he did this and not about the kiss itself, which you kindly return when he backs away.

His hands go for your ass, squeezing and groping it. Your hands go to his hair, it feels soft yet also oily.

"Are you sure this is ok?" he asked, not wanting to do something you're not comfortable with, such a bare minimum gentleman. You answer by pulling him back into the kiss, opening your mouth to grant his tongue access, which he gladly accepts.

Your tongues dance together in a sweet embrace, his then seemingly exploring your entire mouth. Your body gets goosebumps from the exchange, your pants also becoming tighter.

He takes parts off from yours, only to place it on your neck. He kisses it, finding your sensitive parts and then gently biting into them, causing you to shriek.

"Are you ok?" He asked.

"Well, please continue." You replied.

Continue he does, fully biting into your neck and then licking the parts he bit. His teeth attacked every square inch of it, biting, kissing, and licking the whole thing.

Your neck becomes littered with hickeys, almost the entire thing red and indented with bite marks, not that you're complaining. You're surprised with how well he's doing, no way he's had experience with his socially awkward ass, he truly is a prodigy.

He shows his genius more when he lifts up your shirt to suck on your nipples, licking over the right one and biting it, while fondling the left one with his hand. The sensations make you even harder, apparently having the same effect on him, as you can feel his hard on through his pants. Your hands tighten in his hair as he starts to bite more aggressively on your left nipple, pulling at the other one.

He goes from your nipples to the rest of your chest. biting and licking at it, blush covering your face from the act. You're so hard that you feel like you could cum right then and there... until this mother fucker stops.

He whispers in your ear, 'If you want more, follow me into my dorm." He then leaves the closet in all of your disheveled glory.

Now you know why he's been staring at you.

THE END

[vulpixisananimal]

<Null> {Mal Du Pays} [Loop] (Siffrin) (Wren belongs to @fungal--wastes)

(You were looking out the window of your room down to the small courtyard next to the inn. Ramos, Isabeau, Vixul, and Mirabelle had all teamed up to do some training together. It was amazing to watch them all work. They'd paired up to practice with each others weapons. Mirabelle and Vixul, Isabeau and Ramos.)

(Isabeau you knew, big defender that he is. It was hard to take your eyes from him, with how he moved, how he was able to take hits like brick, with how he was smiling the whole time. So confident, strong, he didn't even need a weapon.)

(Ramos you were still learning, but they were fast and strong, like a middle ground between you and Isa. They could get in fast, hurt hard, then stand their ground. Tonfas suited them. The vest and bandana made sense too, like some, cool bandit look, or. . . You shake your head.)

(Mirabelle had been working to get better ever since your fight with Perci. She was always quick on her feet, and was able to sting. She often reacted to things far before her more ration brain caught up; which lead to many accidental bruises.)

(And Vixul, she was fast too, and nimble. She used a spear and knew how to get in and get out quickly. Although, she eventually swapped from spear to a pair of. . . What looked like gauntlets with armor that extended up the forarms. She fought differently, now, more defensive. You'll have to think about that.)

(There's a knock on the door. You sigh, and get up. You're supposed to be resting, but you couldn't sleep. Maybe it was Bonnie coming to nag you about rest again. You go over and open the door.)

". . . Afternoon, Siffrin." (Wren was standing at the door, expression unchanging, as usual.) "May I come in?"

"Uh. . ." (Well this is a surprise.) "Sure?"

"Thank you."

(You turn, walk to your bed, and sit down.) "Haha, sorry it's a mess, don't exactly have the energy to-"

(You were cut off by Wren closing the door, and locking it.)

(You continue.) ". . . Toooo clean up the place, y'know?

"Quite." (He walked over to the small table and chair the room had and placed his book on the table.) "Can we just skip past the small talk, Siffrin?"

". . ." (Oh this was turning from worrying to potentially dangerous. Where did you put your dagger again?) "Uuuuh, oookaaay?"

"Good." (He tilts his head slightly to you, his eyes stabbing directly into your soul.) "You made a wish to be able to turn back time, no? And it was most likely made when you were about to face the King?"

(You can't cover your shock fast enough. He smiles, and continues.) "It was, wasn't it?"

". . . . . H-how-"

"You knew exactly where to find our antagonists. You know things you shouldn't about myself and my companions. You knew Polaris was effected by mind craft before I or Vixul did and exactly what to do about it. And you had a level of craft exhaustion that should have by all rights killed you."

(He continues.) "What's more, I did some digging. Did you hear news of that strange sadness in Jouvente? It was at the same time you saviors were all visiting. I overheard that you and Ramos used to be enemies, Ramos can use mind craft, and that you had craft exhaustion back then, too."

"But, that's-"

(He cuts you off.) "Do you know how many traps are in the that House of Change? Or about how overrun by sadness it was? And from what I hear you ran through it all by yourself. And should I even mention the rumors of a shade stained sky?"

". . ."

"And." (He turns to face you fully.) "I listened in on your 'Former Saviors of Vaugarde' team meeting."

(. . . . . . . . What.)

(Wren just walked into your room and tore down your veil of secrets with one swing. He tore it down, ripped it to shreds, and tossed the remains in a fire. You couldn't be mad, confused, or scared; that would come later. Because right now you were just impressed.)

(You fall back on the bed.) ". . . Yeah. It was the day before we fought the King, too."

"Close, then. And everything else?"

"Dead on." (You sigh.) "I spent 20-odd loops in Jouvente trying to deal with Ramos."

"And here?"

"23? 24? Most of those happened in quick succession. That's what really causes the craft exhaustion." (You rub your head.) "It's like, the body needs to recharge, or, something."

"And when you fought the King?"

". . . . 176." (You sit up again.) "Repeating the same two days over, and over, and over again, for almost a year."

". . ." (You look up, Wren was writing in his book.) ". . . Don't worry, this stays between us."

"It had better." (You look away.) ". . . How do you know about wish craft, anyway."

"I learned about it when traveling with Vixul and Polaris."

(A lie.) "No you didn't."

". . . No, I didn't." (He sighs.) "It doesn't matter. What did you wish for?"

"I think it does matter, Wren." (You cross your arms.) "Wish craft isn't just, something you can pick up any regular old book on and learn about. At least not without a big headache."

(Wren was staring at the pages of his book, like he was burning the pages with his mind.) ". . . . What. Did. You. Wish. For."

". . . Wren-?"

"How did you do it." (He cuts you off again, pen pressed to the page.) "What method did you use?"

"I'm not-"

"How far back can you go?" (His voice wavers.) "How. Far."

"W-wren-"

(His pen snaps in two. There's a silence.)

". . . . . . . ."

". . . . . . . ." (You tuck your legs under your cloak, and look away.)

". . . . . . . I need to know." (He didn't look at you.) "Please."

". . . I, Wren. . . I, I can't tell you. I-it's complicated-"

"I have all day, Siffrin." (His expression, you knew that expression.)

(It's the expression of someone trying with all their might to hold back tears. You knew that expression, because you had seen a picture of yourself with that same expression dozens of times.)

(Okay, you breathe in, and out.) "I can't tell you, because, because it put me through hell. And, and I don't want that to happen to you."

"Try me."

(Is this guy serious?) "Didn't you hear me?!? 176 loops, 352 days, all trying to escape a nightmare where nothing ever changed!!!" (You look away again.) "Whatever you're thinking, it, are, you sure it's worth-"

"I'd loop 300 times." (There's not even a second of hesitation.) "No, I'd do 500. 1,000. Maybe even more. It would be worth it."

(You snap back to him.) "I- you don't, really believe-"

"I do." (His voice is steady.) "I mean every single word, Siffrin."

(. . . . Oh.)

". . ." (He wasn't just serious, he was determined, desperate, begging. There, there was no way out of this was there. J-just, just, keep talking.) ". . . . What's worth it, Wren."

(There is a very, very long silence.)

". . . . . . . . His name was Icarus."

(It's as if you could hear a pin drop.)

(He continued.) "He, he was someone very important to me. . . No, not that. He was the only thing important to me. Every day I would get out of bed because of him. I would endure the world because of him. I would look forward to the nights because of him."

"I would have given him the world, if he asked." (His voice cracks. You see a tear on his cheek.) "If it, if it wasn't for him I would have taken a knife to my throat a long, long time ago."

". . . ." (You had to ask.) "What happened?"

". . . . I, I-I don't know." (He hangs his head down.) "He, h-he's dead, or dying, or somewhere in between it's, I, I can't explain it. And I don't know if I can save him, or if it's too late or if I never could and I'm just wasting my time but I have to try!"

"I have to try."

"I have to try."

". . . . . ."

"Because if I don't try, then he's, he's. . ."

". . . . . . . . . . . ."

(. . . . How could you even respond to that. You couldn't look. It would just, just make you start crying as well.)

[. . . Stardust?]

(Loop? Where have you been-)

[Let me talk to him.]

(. . . O-okay. You close your eye and lean back. You breathe in. . . .)

[. . . .]

[. . . And out. . . . You hold your head in your hand, dizzy. Really dizzy. You wait a second for it to pass, then talk.] ". . . Wren?"

"Siffrin?" (He responds.)

"Close, but no~"

"Right." (He looks at you slightly, eyes dark from tears.) ". . . Loop? Is that the name?"

"Bingo." [You respond, you want to joke around, but your heart isn't in it.]

". . ." [He turns back to the book.] "Here to talk to me?"

"Yes yes, I am." [You roll your eye. You hop back fully on the bed and lay down.] "I'm here to tell you how to make a wish!"

[He looked up suspiciously.] ". . . You are?"

"Yes~" [You put a finger to your chin.] "I'm going to tell you. And I'm going to tell you aaaaaall the details that Siffrin left out~ You're lucky, you know. Not even our good companions know this, so you had better not tell them."

". . . My lips are sealed."

"Good!" [You pause for a second, smiling. Where you really about to tell a stranger this? Yes, you were. What better a place to hide secrets than in another desperate traveler.]

"I made a wish the day before we fought the King to stay with my family. I didn't know that was my wish, just how I did it. I took a leaf that represented me, and whispered my wish into it three times, closed it, and tied it to the tree. And all of a sudden I was in a time loop! And no~ This is very differen't than Stardust- Siffrins experience."

"I had no-one. I was alone in trying to escape it. I was stuck. I battled my way through that house hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands of times." [You continue to smile. Fake. (You knew how to smile. You knew how to fake it.)] "I beat the King. Once."

[(That Desperate one is looking at you, no doubt his mind at work. He was trying to decypher you. He was trying to tell just what was going on with that messed up little head of yours. Oh he was so, SO clever wasn't he!!)]

[(You continue.)] "One time. Once. Out of thousands, and it cost everything. And even after all that, I was still forced back to try it aaaaaall over again~"

"So I gave up! I gave it all up! I cried, pleaded, begged to the Universe for someone ANYONE to help! And do you know what the Universe did? It gave me exactly what I wished for."

[(Your smile wasn't normal.)] "Next thing I knew I woke up at the foot of that favor tree, a new lightless body of stars and a head as bright as the sun. I was unrecognisiable. Not even to myself~"

[(The Desperates eyes widen, you grinn.)] "Figured it out, haven't you~?"

[(There's a pause, he looks you over, your demeanor, your voice, evereything.)] ". . . You're not a normal alter. You are Siffrin."

"Correct~ Aaaand~?"

". . . You, became a sort of guide, for, a new Siffrin?"

"Correct!!" [(You clap your hands together.)] "Stardust didn't recognise me, no one recognised me. I had a lovely new job as the stagehand for my wonderful replacement actor! Forced to guide him untill the very end~ Oh and I do mean forced. I had to teach them how to kill themself because they asked."

"And now as one last cruel joke, with it all over, the Universe took me and stuck me in their blinding body. Forced to watch their happy ending."

"So! Wren, does that sound worth it to you?"

[There is a long, long, long silence. So long that the sound of your friends sparing outside stopped as they finished. You eventually hear Wren let out a breath.]

[He taps a finger on his book and talked quietly.] ". . . You make. . . A compelling argument, but. . ."

"Buuuuuuut~?"

". . . . ." [There was hesitation.] "I, I can't falter now."

[In too deep.]

". . . I understand." [You stand up.] "That's why I'm going to tell you how."

[You walk over to Wren and drag a chair over to sit next to him, you got a new pen, and you got to work.]

[You tell him about wishes, you tell him about home, and how you repeated wishes three, six, seven, or thirteen times. You told him about how whatever you wished for, you had to believe it. And what you wish for might not be what you think you're wishing for.]

[And you warn him every step of the way.]

[It was like you were writing a script. If one thing was out of place, out of line, then the whole play would collapse. You couldn't stop him, you knew that, but this was the next best thing.]

". . . And one last thing."

"Hmm?" [Wren was finishing writing the last of his notes.]

". . . If you decide to go through with this." [You look away.] ". . . Tell those close to you, about everything."

[He pauses, and glances up.]

[You continue.] ". . . It would have, saved me a lot of time."

[He looks at you a moment, then he lets his face relax and smile just a little.] "I promise."

"Thank you." [You get up and stretch.] "If you're looking for more information, go to the Dormont House of Change."

"I imagine you are very familiar?"

"Down to the brick~" [You collapse face down onto the bed.] "Now get out of here, I'm tired."

"Well since you asked so nicely." [He gathers his things, pauses a moment, and goes to leave.]

". . . Wren."

[He pauses.] ". . . Yes?"

". . . . ." [You turn your face away.] "Please, don't make the same mistakes I did."

[There's a pause.] ". . . I'll, do my best. Thank you, Loop."

"Save it." [You hold up a finger.] "Save it for when, for when you don't end up like me."

[interstellarsystem]

Experiences With Being Out as a System

So, our parents know we're a system. It's all good, they understand that when we suddenly speak like someone from London that it's just another guy taking the body for a spin real quick and that they don't need to question it too much.

The thing is... They don't know our names, or anything about us as individuals. We don't have enough open communication with them to actually discuss the inner-workings of the hundreds of little guys in our brain and who they are or what they like, but even if we did, it's not actually important to them. It almost seems like it's swept under the rug.

Our mother said that she doesn't get why she should have to know anyone else when we're all "us". We're all just a collective to her still, a bunch of bits that make up her child, even though she knows we're separate. Her child, the original, isn't here anymore. But the thing is.. some of us want to get to know her and the family individually. Even beyond just being seen as who we actually are, we want to be a part of it aside from being treated as someone who is gone. But it's not a thing they understand despite our explanations of what it means to us, even despite the fact they know the original is dormant and has been for years.

The most anyone in our family knows about us is our mother, and she only knows anyone with a voice similar to Sark as "the american one". She doesn't know that there's even multiple who sound similar to him.

Technically, we're out as a system. Effectively, though... We're still closeted. Though not really because we're staying in it, moreso that we left but it follows us around like a shield within our own household, but it's not shielding us. It's shielding them from us.

Our experience with talking to medical professionals has been hard because of this--sharing bits about ourselves has been scary. It's scarier to show them pictures of our nonhuman headmates and say "that one is me", but it's never actually been bad when we've mustered up the strength to do it. One of them looked at Mal and saw his horns and said he looks like a faun from Greek mythology. Even though he's not, a positive response like that was empowering. That same one said Filigree's hair was cool. Little acknowledgements about who you are when you've tried to be seen before is great.

With our IRL friends, we expected the situation to be similar to our parents. Swept under the rug like a taboo and given weird, uncomfortable looks when spoken about. But it's been completely different.

We get asked who is fronting, we get acknowledged as separate people, hell, we even felt comfortable telling them about our actual fictive identities and letting the ones who wanted to follow this blog (hey guys if you're reading this <3) get access to it. They acknowledge our nonhumanity and nonhuman parts, share things about our sources with us because it reminded them of us, etc. Sometimes, now, because we've been open about it, we get people actually ask "is x fronting" and we say yes and they say "I knew it".

That specific feeling of being recognised even when your outward appearance doesn't change is absolutely amazing. Little manerisms, little ways our voice sounds even when masking accents out in public, even the words we choose to use are tells toward who is actually controlling the body and they pick up on it--even things we might not recognise we even do. Sure, there's hundreds of people in here and people won't know every single one off by heart, but the ones who are out here often are being recognised and that, to me, is amazing and validating to all of us.

I guess the point here is me sharing our experiences, but also.... You will be able to find people who see you for you. You as a system, you as a nonhuman, you as a disabled person, you as a queer person--you'll be able to find your people. And you know, I hope you do soon--because the feeling of being known is great.

[sgiandubh]

Me pareció extraño que ellos (sí, ellos, por supuesto) no simplemente optaran por duplicar su apuesta por Barbie Fitness. Para bien o para mal, ya estaba algo establecido. ¿Qué crees que les llevó a cambiar de rumbo?

Dear Bizarre Anon,

Como siempre, primero la traducción y luego - mi respuesta.

' I thought it was bizarre that they (yes, of course, 'they') didn't just choose to double down on Fitness Barbie. For what it's worth, that was already a fixture. What do you think made them change their mind?'

I have many conflicting thoughts and yes, even feelings about all this, Anon, at the moment. I think it was a botched plan from the very start. Must have picked her from Raya, she was cheaply available (a quick buck for a quick side job, for her) and he did not vet her at all.

Why not double down on the other woman? Too loud, too orange, too brash are things that immediately come to mind. I think she sealed her fate with that Scottish week-end, when she had to share her son's vomit with the entire world. And overexpose a child, in the process. Probably also some things we might never be privy to - so, no use to look for answers in the Room of Nothing.

My answer to your second question will be very short: Park Anon. Panic. The problem was that this pap walk was picked up by People, a media outlet read by many in Hollywood, including agents, directors, producers, etc. A Big Problem, indeed.

For the moment, he turned off tags. I don't think you will see that girl ever again, Anon - and I do think this is a sure sign.

My questions are perhaps simpler:

How many IG followers will he lose in the foreseeable future?

How will this impact OL's broadcast ratings for Seasons 7-B and 8?

How will this impact Sassenach Spirits' sales short and middle-term?

How will this impact his business relationship with Southern Glaziers and the like?

How will this impact MPC's subscription trends and financials?

How will this impact his CSR relationship with NGOs, such as WWF, Blood Cancer UK, etc?

How will this impact a personal brand that can now be legitimately described as unreliable and borderline schizophrenic? And I mean it in a very logical way, as the impossible reconciliation between manwhoring and philanthropy.

From my watchpoint, I couldn't care less about any other rationale. These are the real questions he will have to face soon enough. All the rest is bullshit and sentiment. And we are now forced to talk business, not sentiment. For as far as sentiments are concerned, my answer will never change: they will find a way, even if in the process they might hurt each other. True love is never easy.

[sequencefairy]

Would you mind sharing the link for the inception fic you mentioned because I'm like 👀👀👀 lol. I forget about inception a lot of the time but when I remember I'm OBSESSED with Eames/ Arthur lmao

Oh man! I read so much inception fic actually, but here's what I currently have in my ao3 bookmarks:

the dry sand of daylight - spqr | 15k, E, complete [or: Arthur is married to Eames for the better part of a decade. Then he wakes up.]

All the world is bullet shaped - pushdragon | 76k, E, complete If Arthur thinks that, just by waving enough money around, he can get Eames to risk his life and reputation to rescue him from a death sentence, he's got another thing coming. So Eames sets a malicious, undignified price on his services, one he can be certain that a man like Arthur would never condescend to pay. It turns out to be the first of many mistakes.

The Only Living Boy in New York - witling | 47k, E, complete Arthur and Eames, in limbo. For 47,000 words.

Presque Vu - rageprufrock | 69k, E, complete Or, "on the tip of the tongue." Arthur meets Mal first. He inherits Dom, after. Everything else is on him.

Patience, a Steady Hand - Helenish | 43k, E, complete 821 A.D. Arthur is in the nightmare business. Eames is a thief, a liar, and versatile with a pen.

^ these are all arthur/eames, just re-read the dry sand of daylight tonight again because I like to hurt myself before bed.

play the goddamn part - hardscrabble | 101k, T, complete One simple idea that changes everything: Ariadne, as Cobb sees her - the red-wearing maze designer and Cobb-unraveler - is almost too good to be true. That's because she isn't. True, that is; she's definitely, DEFINITELY good. When her thesis adviser Dr. Stephen Miles puts her in the way of a VERY interesting opportunity (for the low, low price of just one fake ID), Ari decides to go for it and winds up neck-deep in stuff she never knew existed.

When this is finished, she’s going to learn to wear a suit like Arthur, tell a lie like Eames, network like Yusuf, and pull perhaps two per cent of Saito’s annual income over her first five years post-doctorate. She's hung the rest of her life on this job, so she may as well get some off-resume skills out of it.

^ this is like, platonic throuple sort of? it's really lovely, however.

I promise to do a better job of bookmarking shit in the future but one of my sources for good fic, fandom irrelevant, are spqr's bookmarks and there are a BUNCH of good Inception fics in there too!

[dawneternal]

The Benevolent | Nine

☁︎ Eris x Healer OC

☁︎ notes: Thesan is my babygirl

minimal editing on this one cause I needed to just move forward 💛 it's kind of a short chapter but combined with the next one it was too long.

☁︎ warnings: angst, mention of injuries and grief, memories of under the mountain

☁︎ word count: 3.3k

☁︎ AO3 Link / Masterlist

☁︎ taglist: @cauldronblssd @teddyhoneybear @tele86 @mybestfriendmademe @imma-too-many-fandoms @allyjoe755 @milswrites @shadowdaddies @zenkindoflove @landofpetrichor @secret-third-thing @bookwormysblog @mal-adaptive-dreams @daycourtofficial

The aftermath of the war was almost worse than the battle itself. It followed the soldiers home to the Dawn Court, haunted the doorways decorated with mourning feathers, and hung heavy like storm clouds over weary healers. There were far too many vacant stares on far too many faces. So many that Thesan began wondering if he should have never agreed to fight. The condolences he handed out were seemingly endless.

Of course, wishing to change the past was foolish. All he could do now was forge ahead, doing his best to lead his people out of the dark.

Even still, the guilt doubled in weight every time he passed Aya in the halls. That was the only time he saw her lately. She had yet to return to classes, had yet to make an appearance at a family meal. According to the guards, the only thing she did outside her room was pace the palace courtyards.

Thesan began to wonder what else was bothering her. Not that war couldn't be enough on it's own to rattle her, but it was like something had aged her. Something extra was hiding in her tired eyes, something not just haunted but heartsick. He would ask her himself, but she ignored every knock on her door. Svala was sent to her window with notes but always returned empty handed.

So, Thesan began an investigation. He sent inquiries to the healers that had been in charge of Aya's unit. He requested detailed reports of the battle. He sat in on the healer's classes, just to corner a few afterward and ask if they knew what had happened. It was nice to watch the healing sessions, anyways. They reminded him of his father.

For all his efforts, no one had an answer. It was beginning to seem as though the secret would be locked up with Aya forever. Until one timid healer caught him on the way out of the classroom, looking up at the High Lord with wide eyes as she spoke.

"It was the Autumn Heir," the healer said, a tremble in her voice, "Eris came into one of the tents and they spoke. I don't know what they said, but after he left Aya started crying. It was the only time she cried during any of the battles."

Thesan's fury was immediate, presenting itself as lightning cutting through the cheerful blue sky. He thanked the terrified healer with as kind of a voice as he could manage, making a note to send a message of apology later as he stalked away. He had half a mind to winnow to the Autumn Court and force the truth from Eris's mouth himself, feet moving mindlessly down the hall toward a winnow gate. But then he remembered he was a High Lord and he could not enter another court and throttle their Heir with his bare hands. Turning on his heel, he trudged back the other way, cursing Edana's infernal gift.

He willed the skies to calm, shrinking the storm clouds had been sculpted by his temper. In most things, Thesan was steady. Level. Ambivalent. But when it came to Aya, all of that melted away. The moment she had entered the world, he had named himself her protector. And the first time he had witnessed the way his aunt looked at Aya's wings, he knew that Aya would be fighting for her mother's love. But never from Thesan. He decided that she would never have to fight him for love or kindness or protection. He knew that his mother had decided the same thing. In that moment, Aya had become half theirs.

So Edana may have her secrets and her clever plans and all manner of cunning things up her sleeves. But there was plenty she did not know about Thesan, in return. If his family were to suffer because of what she'd done, then he would see to it that hers did, too.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

Thesan stood outside Aya's door, waiting. He had knocked twice now, and had been meet with nothing but silence. Now his patience was wearing thin, wittled away by his worry and anger.

Once more, he knocked, followed with a growl,

"I command you as your High Lord to open this door."

There was a long pause as Thesan guessed she was trying to resist the command. But his power won out, a string of shuffling footsteps growing closer. The door swung open and revealed a frowning Aya. Beneath the fierce scowl, her face was thin and hollow, eyes underlined by deep bags. Her hair was tangled and messy, her oversized sweater rumpled.

"I want to talk to you," Thesan said, attempting to soften his voice.

Aya turned and stalked back to her bed, calling over her shoulder, "Fine, but don't bring the attitude with you. I'm not in the mood for it."

Thesan did as he was told, figuring that a command for a command was a fair trade. He swallowed the last of this fury before stepping through the doorway.

He took a moment to look around the room as he slipped off his shoes and set his staff against the wall. It had been a long while since he'd been in here. Aya had added to her decor, new plants hanging in sculpted pots, pictures and newspaper clippings tacked up above her desk. Sun catchers, trinkets, and ephemera littered every surface, the air scented like sage sticks and herbaceous candles. The room was bursting with Aya.

She did not look like the same vibrant girl who had filled this room with her collections, sitting on the bed wrapped in a quilt. Her wings made a bulky shape under the blanket, her peaked face poking out of the patchwork, all anger replaced with sadness. Perhaps that's why she hid herself away. An inability to keep that sorrow off her features for long. Usually, she hid her emotions with ease.

Thesan gingerly crawled onto the bed, sitting cross legged beside her. He waited a moment, seeing if she would speak first, but she remained quiet.

"I need you to be honest with me, Aya," He started, pausing as he stared straight ahead at a line of postcards going up the wall. The highest bottommost one was from before Amarantha, likely the last time Aya had traveled for leisure. It was dusty, like she did not even like to go near it while cleaning.

Aya heaved a deep sigh. She was still silent, but he could feel her resignation.

"Did something happen in the battle?" He prodded.

"It's always difficult to have my powers on display like that," She shrugged, eyes straight ahead, "For everyone to know what I can do."

"You know," He said slowly, "I've heard nothing but praise for your performance. I heard that you took an arrow dragging another healer off the field."

The quilt rustled and an arm poked out. She rolled up her sleeve, revealing a scar where an arrow had torn through her flesh.

"Of course they like me when I'm saving them," She spat. Though she'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Silence settled. Thesan did not know what to say to that. He waited until she was ready and spoke of her own volition.

"I held a soldier's head in my lap while he died. He asked me to tell his family that he loved them and he was sorry." Aya pursed her lips, gaze still far away as she spoke.

Thesan let out a noise like a growl, closing his eyes and resting his head against the wall.

"Did you?" He asked, already knowing the answer. There was no universe where Aya would have denied that request.

"I did," She whispered.

Yet Thesan was sure that this wasn't it. As horrible as it may be, as horrible as she may feel over it, there was more. He could sense it, all of the things she was holding back. It was a delicate game and he could not push too hard.

“Should I not have agreed to fight?” He asked, instead of another prodding question, bearing the weight on his own chest.

“If we had given anything less than we did, Hybern would have won,” Aya gave a small shake of her head, “It's unfair to pay the price for doing the right thing. But that's the thing about war, I guess. Someone always pays.”

She was right, of course. That he knew what they were getting into. That some days, in the midst of putting back together his court, it felt as though there were no prize, even though their side had won the war. But the prize was their freedom.

Thesan and Aya sat side by side, neither speaking for a long time. He watched the sun wash an array of soft colors over the walls as it moved through the sky. He had almost forgotten where he was, what his goal was, soaking in the first quiet moment he'd gotten in a long time, when his cousin stirred beside him.

He did not expect her to slowly slump forward, her face crumpling as she buried it in her hands. Tears dripped through her fingers and onto the blanket. While Thesan was letting his mind still, a desire to confess was growing in Aya's mind. She didn't want to hold it all in, anymore. She felt as though this room was bursting with her sorrow.

"I think I did something very bad," She whispered finally, taking a shuddering breath.

"What is it?" Thesan's brows drew together, his worry rising. His fingers clenched and unclenched, restless without the comforting presence of his staff.

"I think I made a mating bond with my power," She said, her gaze cast down on the mess of blankets and pillows.

"What?" Thesan felt as though he'd been plunged under water, "Is that possible?"

"I haven't been able to find anything on it. But no one ever seems to know anything about my powers." She shut her eyes tight, a tear squeezing out of the corner.

"Who-" Thesan cleared his throat. "Who is it?"

Aya cast him a look, equal parts forlorn and scolding. Asking him not to make her say it. He already knew, she was certain.

"Did he feel it?" Thesan obliged, plowing ahead as though she had given him an answer. He did not exactly feel like saying that name out loud.

"No," Aya choked, "Definitely not."

“So you….” He paused, his mind beginning to wrap around what she was trying to say, “So a bond snapped, but only for you?”

The despair, settled so deeply in her features, was like a knife in Thesan's chest. So hard he had worked to ensure that nothing would ever pain her this way. But he could not fight fate, and he was no match for the Mother.

"I'm sorry, little bird." And he did mean it, no matter how he felt about Eris.

“I did not mean to,” Aya croaked, squeezing her eyes shut tight, “But I don't think I can undo it.”

She had tried to clip the golden strand between them, but it was solid like metal.

“Hush,” Thesan said softly, “Of course you didn't mean to. That doesn't mean you don't feel it all the same.”

Aya leaned into his side, letting her tears fall freely. Neither one of them cared much for physical affection, but Aya's sadness dragged her down like gravity. She needed his shoulder to hold her up, to keep her from falling into the chasm completely. Thesan stayed still, steady and willing to be her pillar.

Long moments passed, clouds floating by as Aya tried to put herself back together again.

"You're at a crossroads," Thesan said after a while, purple twilight beginning its descent in the sky outside the windows, "And you have a lot of decisions to make."

"I don't think there's anything to do," Aya said, her voice cracking.

"The future is in your hands, Aya," Thesan shook his head, "You can decide if you're going to tell him, or when. You can learn more about your powers. You can decide who you want to be after your world has changed so much."

Aya sat up straight again, her face streaked with dried tears. Her brows slowly drew together as she thought, carving wrinkles into her forehead.

"I don't think I could ever be anything but what I am."

A terrible feeling rose in Thesan's throat. They'd been down this road before, and he hated it every time. And yet every time, he could not help but try again.

"And what is it that you are?" He asked, trying to keep the frustration out of his tone.

Aya was quiet, words trapped behind pursed lips. She remembered how little he seemed to appreciate any answer she gave to this question.

A monster. A mistake. A mess.

"You've spent too long trying to be nothing," Thesan sighed.

"I am nothing," Aya replied, so simply and without hesitation, like it was a universal fact.

Thesan's eyes fluttered shut, hiding the way her words wounded him. Under the mountain, nothing he went through mattered as long as Aya was hidden. But Amarantha had still managed to take something from her. With every dose of faebane and every reminder of her pretend role, a piece of Aya's sense of self had been chipped away. This thing with Eris had been like the final blow.

Every night in that hellscape he had loosed a sigh of relief that another day had passed without Aya being dragged in by Amarantha's cronies. And at least in the Dawn Court, she was not in danger of her being tortured for amusement. But up here, she had been breaking all the same.

"Aya," He said fiercely, eyes opening to reveal a dangerous glow, "Even without your powers, you would not be nothing. Even without a mate, you would not be nothing. You will always be something special to me. You are -"

He choked on the words, pausing to clear his throat,

"You are my little sister."

Aya's face crumpled, a fresh wave of tears breaking through. She grabbed the collar of his shirt and buried her face in this chest. Thesan wrapped his arms around her as sobs shook her small frame, her wings shuddering with each breath. He swallowed the painful lump in his throat and blinked away the burning in his eyes.

Finally she pulled back and looked up at him, eyes watery, and said, "You are my brother. You always have been. I'll try, for you. I will make my choices."

"Good," He smiled and gave her hair a slightly awkward pat, still unused to the convention of hugs.

“Do you think I am awful for not telling him right away? I just need time.”

“No,” Thesan shook his head, “I would probably make the same choice. Many want to wait until the bond snaps for the other. And you are still a whole person without him.”

He watched as Aya chewed her lip, eyes glazing over as she delved into her thoughts. He had read her plight correctly. It was not just grief, and she was heartsick. And it was all the more clear, that longing radiating from her. The pain that coursed through her body with every beat of her heart. He had no doubt that her back and wing pain must be flared up from all of this stress. Yet another reason for hiding away. She was but always met with understanding for this invisible pain, even by other healers.

A little pang of sadness hit him with the idea that she was truly grown up. Aya had a mate, and her heart belonged to him.

“You care for him, though?” Thesan said, a little cautiously, needing to hear it for himself, “You want him as a mate?”

Aya's chin wobbled a bit, her shoulders drooping and Thesan winced at the pain his question had caused.

“Very much,” She whispered. After a moment she gathered herself and took a deep breath.

"As for the other stuff,” Aya sat back against her headboard, wiping away the remainder of her tears again, “Where do I start?”

"I think you should let go of your guilt," He began.

Aya smiled to herself. Thesan had an affinity for three-part plans. If she had to guess, he had two more suggestions to follow.

"Because whether or not you actually made a bond, you did not mean to," He continued, "And then I think you should see Rhysand."

"Rhysand?" Aya furrowed her brows, bewildered.

"Yes. I think it's possibly he may have some information about your powers. If not, he does have that library."

"But why Rhysand?"

"He is also mated," Thesan added quietly, and Aya's stomach flipped over at the idea of confessing her situation to someone else. "And the alternative is the Day Court."

They grimaced in unison, at that. Helion seemed to view their reserved personalities as a challenge. The more quiet they were, the more outrageous his teasing and flirting became. Neither cousin was feeling up to dealing with his attempts to "crack them open", as the High Lord of Day liked to say.

"Would you be going with me?" Aya asked, her thoughts shifting toward the Night Court.

"I think the visit would be more productive if you went on your own," Thesan said, thinking of how difficult it was to shed the layer of professionality he had developed as High Lord. And the way Aya tended to draw out the vulnerable side of whoever she spoke to. Then his face softened into something tender and he said, "But if you'd like some company to get a mourning feather, I will happily go with you."

A mourning feather. Aya had not considered that idea, but it eased a bit of the tightness in her chest. One of her feathers, changed by magic, to grow in ink-black from that point on to represent and honor a loss. They were appearing in greater numbers these days, some leaders having whole rows changed, stark stripes against their naturally light feathers.

"Yes, please." Aya whispered, swallowing that incessant lump in her throat.

A silence settled again, this time so much lighter, Aya's confessions dancing in the air like dust through beams of light. Her heart felt a little less heavy. She breathed in deep, filling the cavity of her chest, and with the exhale she tried to release at least a small piece of her guilt.

"I am sorry," Thesan said. Aya turned toward him, questioning. "I am sorry for underestimating your powers."

Aya frowned. She had always been so honest with him. She thought they were on the same page.

“I knew that I was underestimating you. I downplayed your magic in my mind because I was afraid.”

“I have always been afraid,” Aya whispered. She would agree to learning more about her powers, but she was not quite ready to commit to doing something with them.

“But I think we both know it's time to see who you could become.”

"You knew I could get through your wards, didn't you? You weren't surprised when you confronted me after the High Lord's meeting."

"Yes," He smiled, "I did know that. And I knew you could read people well, but I ignored it and I'm sorry. It would have been helpful during that meeting. You could have told me all kinds of things."

A grin spread on Aya's face, and for a moment all of her despair disappeared. Thesan hid his relief with an exaggerated groan and a roll of his eyes.

"Fine, just say it." He sighed.

"I told you so," Aya sang, emphasizing each word with a wiggle of her finger.

"Whatever," Thesan said, very un-High-Lord-like, and slid off the bed. He grabbed his staff and shoes, and said over his shoulder, "Get ready. I'll be back in ten minutes and then we're going out."

"Where are we going?"

"Pastries," Thesan scoffed, as if she should have known, "Of course.”

[prodigaldaughteralice]

So, I was tipped off a while ago by a post that’s probably still in my queue (I have a long reblog queue u_u;; ) that a few words were changed in the US edition of Monstrous Regiment. As it’s my favourite Discworld book, and I’d only ever read the US edition, I tracked down a second-hand UK first edition online and had a re-read as soon as it came, with my battered old US edition next to me so I could check when anything pinged me as ‘off’. Here’s what I found, not counting minor UK->US spelling changes like turning “girlie” into “girly”.

(There may be more that I missed, I didn’t have both copies open the whole time, but I’m pretty familiar with this book. As my sister teased me about when I mentioned I’d done this comparison, I did have it in my bed for several years as a teenager so I could reread it whenever my insomnia was hitting particularly hard.)

Spoilers from here on out, of course.

The first two are just kind of pointless? Changing “coprolite” to “coprolith”, which is just a less common word for the exact same thing, and changing “riff-riff-raff” to “riffraff” feels like they forgot Jackrum was playing drunk in that scene. Whatever. These don’t bother me.

There are a few UK->US type changes in the next one (“wooly vest” to “woolen undershirt”) which similarly feel pointless to me, but what really gets my goat is the last word. “The man’s bare chests,” plural, being changed to “the man’s bare chest”. Because that’s foreshadowing, but it’s not a giveaway, because on a heavier (cis) guy they do hang separate. It’s a nice little touch, and they took it out.

The next one is the one I’d been tipped off to, and it’s the change I’m the most annoyed about. “Turned her chair to the fire/around him the kitchen worked” -> “turned her chair to the fire/around her the kitchen worked.” I’m sure whatever editor changed it didn’t do so with any kind of malice or agenda, they just weren’t paying enough attention and thought they were fixing a continuity mistake, but it’s just such beautiful writing that they removed.

Because they’ve just had this incredible, delicate, vulnerable conversation about the girl Jackrum left behind him, and that that girl was him, and that he has a son out in Scratz and he doesn’t know what to do now that he’s leaving the army. Polly cries. And it’s Polly who suggests that he really can remain Jack Jackrum, he can go back to his son in medals and braid and be his father, and Jack gets to really settle in to the idea that he can be happy that way. Both those pronouns being “her” doesn’t feel wrong, necessarily; I always read it as Polly processing. But the switch between the two sentences is so beautiful. It’s a gentle closing of the conversation, it’s that girl being fully put behind him, and Sergeant Major Jack Jackrum (retired) getting to go on with his life.

The last one is just… odd. Inexplicable, and it’s the hardest to explain as just an editorial accident. They added a word that specifies something that was not previously specified. “One of them was Maladicta, in full uniform” becomes “one of them was Maladicta, in full female uniform.” I was thinking about it on this reread, and Mal is the only member of the squad who wasn’t publically outed at the Keep. Mal wasn’t involved in the actual raid— too busy gibbering and sucking on a sack of coffee beans— and at the trial Mal kind of stood in the back vibrating from caffeine overdose. Even Jackrum said “with vampires, who cares”. Only Polly knows about Maladicta.

And what that means is that Mal is the only member of the squad who could reasonably remain presenting as male in the army. Polly encourages a couple of young recruits in the very end that it’s their choice to enlist as men or as women, with Mal right beside her, and I think the original ambiguity there is really lovely— it doesn’t matter if Mal has an ‘a’ on the end at the moment, because Mal is there to help Polly fuck shit up, and that’s what matters. By adding the specificity, they just… took away a really nice bit of subtext, a really nice effect.

So yeah, I’m ticked off as a queer person about the (minor) subversion of the book’s general gender fuckery, but I’m almost more ticked off as a writer. Pratchett was so talented, and we talk about it a lot on a large scale of themes and motifs and characters, but he was also just so fantastic on a sentence to sentence level. This is craft! This is really beautiful, delicate writing, elegantly put together and perfected, and some US editors just. Took out some of it. And it’s still an incredible book! As I mentioned, I had it in my bed for years as a teenager so I could reread it over and over, it means a ton to me, it’s my favourite of his work and I love his work! But it hurts to see these little places where it was originally even better.

[theweeklydiscourse]

Alina loving her powers would mean for her to love herself. Whenever she loves her light, the way it makes her feel, the way it protects her, she is loving who she is and defying the will of an oppressive society that wants her to hate herself. She was meant for another story where the author doesn’t chastise her for loving herself and create a bizarre message that if you love yourself too much, you need to be humbled and put in your place.

Shadow and bone glorifies repression in a disturbing way. It almost seems to praise Alina’s repression during her adolescence as an accomplishment that eventually allowed her to defeat the Darkling and proof of her humility. In RoW, she condemns her supposed greed in the past in an act of self-flagellation because OBVIOUSLY she must perform her humility to prove that losing her powers wasn’t a horrible thing. This self-hatred is then transformed into condemnations of the Darkling and reveals her (and the narrative’s) fear that she will become like him. It’s almost hilarious how scared the story is of Alina potentially understanding him and sympathizing with his ambitions.

That’s ultimately the great fear of the story. That Alina will care enough about something to actually use her power to change the status quo and help other people aside from Mal. That she will embrace who she truly is and become active in her life. Taking responsibility and stepping up to the challenge is wrong and evil, so she should just sit down and quietly hate herself while the problem gets worse

[ohwormwood]

random thoughts i have while playing isat pt. 7

[woe, spoilers be upon ye!]

opened the game and immediately went "im gonna make odile question my sanity!!!" but of course when i enter the house Siffrin decides to turn the scripted tutorial enemy into bean paste and ruins the run--

anyways. this panel will haunt me

i. i dont even know how but. I beat the king without him ever getting a chance to make his first attack. i just kept spamming slow and two jackpots later he was dead. i didn't even knoiw that was possible.

after a bit of fucking around i decided that i was gonna move on to act 5 and promptly burst into tears

update: i accidentally posted this too early dont look at me

sat and cried through the entirety of the party's interactions in act 5

screaming crying throwing up

even the king took one look at this dude and was like "are you good man like, you can take a rest before we do this you're literally about to topple over"

that post where odile says the oven copypasta during the mal du pays scene has permanently altered my brain and i literally laughed out loud when this line appeared

i haven't talked about it before but. a while ago i made a concept for a game based off the backrooms and omori, and odile talking about someone who is forgotten may not exist is the basis for the entire game's plot, it makes me want to go back and flesh it out a bit more!!!

i am deadset on the idea of making an edit with mirabelle's reflection craft but it's an uno reverse card

simultaneously in my brain: an edit where the sound mirabelle's reflection craft makes is the metal pipe meme

i am. such a fucking sucker for sickfics. i cannot get enough of them. act 5 has enough sickfic tropes to make a million spinoff fics on its own, it brings me life and i love it dearly

wailing

this line sends me into orbit every time i see it

odile attacking siffrin. hurts so, so so badly on an emotional level for me. Because like??? i get it. i get it and it sucks and she obviously doesn't want to, but she's scared. But siffrin is even more scared in that moment, and the immediate association of that pain with being hated by odile hurts me so much.

YEAHHHH ODILE GIRLBOSS SUPREME

they're so soft and squishy and cute in this image i c a n t

incoherent WAILING. this. this image. this image just about broke me. THEYRE SO HAPPY and RELIEVED, IT HURTS,,,

the tone shift to talking to the party afterwords is still so funny to me HJBDFBSBFH like lookit him. hes so smol. so silly.

we're kidnapping bonnie guys it's official

my honest reaction to this line: LESBIANS??????

and then she hits me with:

AND I LOST IT

more silly guy siffrin,,,,, my favorite

aaaa aAAAAAAAAAAA

ISABEAU'S SPRITE CHANGING TO BE DOING A HAPPY DANCE AFTER THE CONFESSION IS SOOOOO CUTE WAAA

bonnie and odile clapping for isabeau confessing will never not be funny but ALSO it implies the bonnie knew about Isa's crush. and i for one personally believe that they picked up on it from Odile's relentless teasing of Isabeau as the #1 Isafrin shipper

mirabelle: wait you had a crush on sif?????? and i didn't know????

my roommate, who is ace: this is the aroace experience for real,,,

literally all of the second interactions with Isabeau had me and my roommate SCREAMING

HOWLING LAUGHING

OK I NEVER KNEW???? THAT SIFFRIN TOLD ISABEAU ABOUT THE BAD TOUCH EVENT?????? IN CANON???? I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT WAS A FANON THING BUT THEY ACTUALLY ADDRESS IT IN GAME AND???? ISA'S REACTION HAD ME ON THE FLOOR

siffrin: i kissed you once,,,,

isa:

the words "im being perfectly normal about this" is something i say on a daily basis so i relate to this wholeheartedly

AYO???????? ISA WHEN DID YOU BECOME SO SMOOTH????

this. this image. made my jaw hit the GODDAMN FLOOR. I WAS NOT MENTALLY PREPARED FOR IT AT ALL AND BOTH ME AND MY ROOMMATE S C R E A M E D WHEN WE SAW IT

LIKE???? HOLY FUCK SIF JESUSSSSSSSSSSS CHRIST???? how did isabeau not implode on the spot from that look bro howwwwwwwwwww

AND THEN. AS IF THAT WASN'T ENOUGH TO MAKE MY HEART START SOBBING. ISA BLOWS YOU A KISS???? AAAA???

annnnd scene!

i will continue playing to get some of the different loop endings and i totally plan on doing two hats in the future!!! so im not quite done with this game yet i just got impatient in act 4 and i needed the Emotional Catharsis of Act 5