#(although i used they instead of the person's actual pronouns i think it is pretty obvious who im talking about to any of my other friends)

[yanderespamton78]

Time for my favourite game: Do I Have A Crush On This Person Or Have I Just Never Had A Friend This Close And Also Never Had A Crush Therefore I Am Interpretating My Affection For This Person As Romantic Attraction

[gay-impressionist]

Hi! I’m starting to learn French and one thing that’s both cool and weird to me is how everything is gendered in a way (referring to someone/whose saying the statement/etc.) and I was wondering how that relates to people who identity as non-binary or gender fluid in France? Are there equivalents to they/them pronouns or neo pronouns in French?

I do plan on doing my own research about this but I figured since I love your blog and you’re really open about different cultural lgbtq+ communities I’d try here first!

That's an awesome question... with a complicated answer lmao. So buckle up and bear with me !

Basically, you can't be non-binary in French. The community found ways to do it but it's not mainstream. Most of the time, they're going to get misgendered or will have to misgender themselves to get understood.

Some things I'm going to list here are not proper French. Actually, they can even be forbidden in some circumstances, according to the law (the use of inclusive language, and more specifically le point médian, was made illegal in schools in 2021 for ex) or simply because your company etc forbids it. So use this wisely, there is a time and place for inclusive language in France.

That said, things have greatly developed over the last two decades. Which was partly because of the queer community and mainly because of feminists, who are tired of the way French erases women. More and more people are using inclusive language, at least in some circumstances and circles (for ex, i wrote my master's thesis in inclusive language and it was accepted bc i was in a leftist faculty). And inclusive language is debated as a serious issue now, which is saying something.

So, how do you use inclusive language in practice?

There are different ways, as it's informal and mostly new. People are still testing new things and trying out various methods. You can stick to one or alternate or mix them up.

Pronouns

Officially, there isn't a gender neutral pronoun. We don't have an equivalent to they. You're either talking about a man or a woman. If it's both, you use masculine pronouns ("masculine trumps feminine" rule). Same thing if you don't know the gender of the person ("masculin générique").

The most common neopronoun is "iel" (plural : iels), which is obviously a contraction of the masculine pronoun "il" and its feminine equivalent "elle". It works for nb folks or to avoid talking about someone's gender or to refer to a group of men and women. So it's equally used by the queer community and feminists.

I'm pretty sure other neopronouns exist but I can't think of any at the top of my head.

Choosing the right words

Sometimes, inclusive language is just about learning to use alternatives.

Instead of using gendered words, you can choose to use gender-neutral words or words "épicènes", aka words which are identical in their feminine and masculine form. For ex, instead of "homme politique" or "femme politique", you can use "personnalité politique". Personnalité is a feminine word but it's actually gender-neutral as you can use it for women and men alike. "Élève" (student) is épicène, as a female student and a male student are both referred to as "élève". Although épicène words as a gender-neutral option only work in their plural form, as you have to choose either a feminine or masculine article for the singular ("les élèves" is inclusive but it can only be "un" or "une" élève).

As good as this method is, it can be quite limitating. Your vocabulary will be drastically reduced and it can be quite hard to master that kind of speech so you can reach the point where you don't have to think everything over for ages before you open your mouth.

With oral French, you can take it a step further by choosing words that sound the same even if they have a different spelling. Ex, friend is "ami" or "amie" but it's pronounced the same way so if you say it out loud, people can't know how you're gendering it (as long as there isn't a gendered article/word with it ofc).

It avoids misgendering people but the downside is that, as masculine is considered neutral in French, people will often think : no gender specified = masculine. Not even because they're sexist or whatever, it's just so ingrained in our brains that it's a knee-jerk reaction.

That's also why most feminists often prefer to use explicitly feminine words when talking about women. For ex, they prefer the word "autrice" to "auteure" (female writer) because the second one sounds the same as its masculine version "auteur". And as previously mentionned, out loud, people will assume by default you're talking about a man. It's a big debate though, lots of women prefer words that sound masculine - going as far as refusing to use feminine words at all! Which sounds cool and gender-bending as fuck but in reality comes from feminine words traditionally seen as less legitimate and serious. Even today, if you look up the word empress "impératrice" in a French dictionary, the first definition that comes up is "wife of an emperor". "Woman ruling a country" comes second. Using a masculine title to refer to women can also be a way to mock them and show they're not welcome (a french deputy got fined in 2014 because he called the female president of the national assembly "Madame le président" and refused to use the feminine title "Madame la présidente").

Recently the tendency and official guidelines have been to feminize words, so I'd say go with that by default, but respect other people's choice if they specify how they want to be called.

Anyway I'm getting off-track but what I meant was that in French, if you avoid talking about gender, you're automatically erasing women (and nb people). So if you want to include everyone, you need to make it obvious.

Inclusivity as a statement

The most common way to make women and men equally visible is the "point médian" rule, which you can also use to refer to non-binary people as it avoids picking a specific gender.

Basically, it means pasting together the masculine and feminine forms of a word and using dots/middle dots/hyphens/parentheses/capital letters to create an inclusive word. For ex, instead of saying acteur (♂️) or actrice (♀️) for actor, you'll write "acteur.ice". For the plural form, there are two schools of thought : either you separate the feminine and masculine form AND the suffix used to signify the plural, or you don't. Aka, "acteur.ice.s" or "acteur.ices". Personally I prefer the second option because less dots makes it easier to read and faster to write, but it's an individual choice, both work.

There are two major downsides to this method : it only works in writing + it isn't doable for every word, as feminine and masculine words can be quite different and pasting them together that way would be unintelligible. Ex, "copain" and "copine" (friend or boyfriend/girlfriend depending on the context) would give something like "cop.ain.ine"...

You can work around that by choosing alternative words (as previously stated!). And it's still a pretty good method, especially as it works for any type of word (adjectives etc). Some people argue that it's hard to read and ugly but personally I think it's just a matter of habit (although it does pose a problem for people using screen readers). Be aware that it is the most controversial version of inclusive writing, as it's the furthest structure from how languages typically work.

If you don't like dots or want an alternative for oral speech, you can also straight up create new words that sound both feminine and masculine, making them gender-neutral. To use the previous example, "copain" and "copine" become "copaine".

Obviously, this only works if it's obvious which words they're based on. I think it's a great way to make French more inclusive but I'd advise against using it with uninitiated people as it would probably confuse them more than anything. This method is still quite niche.

An inclusive, yet binary language

As you've probably figured out, inclusive language remains quite binary in the way we approach it. It's more about making things both masculine and feminine than transcending gender and creating gender-neutral alternatives. Probably because inclusive language was more often a will to stop women from being erased rather than a non-binary friendly gesture.

Which means, there are also some rules that were created to avoid the "masculine trumps feminine rule" but don't allow room for non-binarity at all. I'll still explain them because they're interesting and you might encounter them at some point.

The proximity rule ("règle de proximité") is one of these. It existed in Ancient Greek and Latin but was dropped in Modern French in favor of the masculine trumps feminine rule. Basically, you gender things according to what's closest in the sentence instead of systematically using masculine words to gender a mixed group. For ex, instead of saying "Les hommes et les femmes sont beaux" you say "Les hommes et les femmes sont belles", as the subject "femmes" is closer to the adjective "beau/belle" than "hommes".

Another method is to systematically use both masculine and feminine words (which I personally find excruciating to write and read). Meaning, instead of writing "Les étudiants mangent à la cantine" (students eat at the cafeteria), you'll write "Les étudiantes et les étudiants mangent à la cantine".

This is mainly for the subject of the sentence : adjectives and such are gendered according to the masculine trumps feminine rule. The point is to explicitly include women, not to make the sentence unintelligible or gender-neutral.

When following this method, you also have to pay attention to whether you put the feminine subject first or the masculine. The rule is to follow alphabetical order. For ex, in "l'égalité entre les femmes et les hommes", "femmes" comes first because F comes before H. But in "Les auteurs et les autrices de roman", "auteurs" comes first because E comes before R. Etc.

This method is common as it's the only inclusive language you can get away with, given that it's a valid way of speaking French. It's even mandatory in some situations now, like in job descriptions for the french administration, in the spirit of gender equality.

So, how do I gender a non-binary person?

In short, you can use the pronoun iel + avoid gendered words and/or use the point médian and/or make up new words.

But keep in mind that if you're not talking to someone familiar with these rules, you'll have some explaining to do. And looots of people are still very anti inclusive language, because they're sexist and/or transphobic, ignorant, language purists, etc. A few years ago it was the thing to be angry about for conservatives and anti-feminists so it's still very controversial. But if you're in a trans inclusive queer space or talking with intersectionnal leftists, go for it !

I hope I covered everything (fellow french, don't hesitate to comment!) and didn't put you to sleep lmao. If you want to see some examples, you can look it up on Wikipedia or check #bagaitte on tumblr (it's the french queer tag) 😉

[absolutebl]

thai language question! what do tongthap and atom call each other in MLMU TH? it sounds like ‘nai’ or maybe ‘ngai’? it’s translated to both of their names several times on the YT subs. i’ve tried to look it up but i’m not sure i’m hearing it right 🙈

Thai pronoun: Nai

They are indeed using nai. Hold on I know I posted about that one at some point... AH HA here it is:

you want this section: (but I'll c&p it over here add to it at the bottom)

Nai & the Mafia 

So in 2022 Thai BLs seriously started moving setting outside of the school systems and thus added new pronouns (for us watchers) into the mix. KinnPorsche, Even Sun, and Unforgotten Night all use the pronoun nai (นาย) for you between men. Like many honorifics & pronouns, it’s derived from a minor title of nobility. In the 19th century it was declared the official courtesy title for adult males - regarded as a direct translation of “Mr”. 

It has several different uses today. 

As a title, it only appears before the real given name (not surname), in official/formal contexts, e.g. when writing down one’s name on an exam paper, job application, or government form. If used with a nickname, it implies a bit of irony (like a teacher calling out a misbehaving student). 

As a pronoun, it’s usually an informal second-person pronoun used with males of equal status. It’s a decidedly non-rude word, so it’ll be used among friends/classmates if they don’t feel close enough to use gu/mueng (or if a person just doesn’t use rude pronouns, like swear words there are people who don’t feel comfortable ever saying guu/mueng). 

Rao/nai as pronouns used to be the default mode of address on TV before gu/mueng became acceptable to broadcast in the 2010s. 

When used by females, nai is pretty much equivalent to males using ter with females - so an old fashioned but intimate and sweet, loving. 

On TV, the use of ter/nai is probably most often associated with straight dramas in the acquaintance phase of courting. 

Nai also has the meaning “boss” (similarly to the combined form เจ้านาย (jao nai/chao nai). If it’s being used as a pronoun in a more formal or deferential context (like organized crime), it is used in this sense. 

Usage number 2 & 6 are the ones we see in Thai BL. All that said I understand as a tourist in Thailand, you will hear nai but not all that often. It’s fine to use khun instead/back, but good to know to identify nai. 

Nai & My Love Mix Up

So My Love Mix Up is using #2.

With adult males, nai is actually often paired with chan. (I know, right, but it's what they use. See any of the mafia shows.)

But in this high school setting, Atom & Kongthap seem to be using pom or sometimes even tan. (I haven't touched on tan at all because I find it the most confusing pronoun.)

Atom & Half use guu/mueng. Atom use rao/name with Mudmee, and she does they same with him. Although I think she shifts to chan with Half when they get closer.

Kongthap doesn't seem to ever use informal. Even Half uses nai with him.

So I think the use of polite nai in this relationship is being dictated by Kongthap's character's reserved gentlemanly stiffness (much as in the original show). In other words, were it not for Kongthap's personality, this show in this setting (and with this pair) would be using guu/mueng. But because of the original IP and the extreme reserve of Ida in Kieta Hatsukoi (who also uses quite formal Japanese) we are seeing a linguistic characterization of one half of a couple carry through to the tenor of the whole relationship.

In other words, the use of nai was dictated by Kongthap's personality.

Frankly put, Kongthap would simply not use guu/mueng so they had to find some other way for these two to communicate. Rao/ter is too sweet and cute and old fashioned out the gate (these boys could graduate to it, I suppose, like in college or after).

Now they might have used khun instead of nai. If this were set in uni or the office that would have worked fine. Or even if this were a high school in Bangkok. But I'm not surprised they reached for nai.

In fact, since the announcement of the adaptation I was curious about how they were going to approach Kongthap's pronouns. I thought they might make Kongthap older to solve the issue with phi but they wanted to do the "going away to college together?" part of the plot, so yeah... nai is the solution.

This couple sounds a bit stiff and distanced from each other when speaking together as a result, but I understand why the script chose it.

Hope that explains.

(source)

[pinkeoni]

...but what was Will really saying in the van?

This a post a year after the fact, when post people have already said what needs to be said, but you know what!! This is my blog and I can say whatever I want.

Will talking about himself and using El as a guise is pretty obvious. The handful of people who say that it really was from El are few and far between. El doesn't gaf about DnD, she's not even in the painting, and she even told Mike herself that she didn't know what Will was making.

Whether or not Mike actually believed Will's lie is something that I'm personally on the fence about, but I'm not talking about him today! There are plenty of great Mike posts about this if you want a Mike analysis.

The cinematography supports this as well. At the start of the scene, Will is established on the left side of the frame, and Mike is on the right. When Will tells Mike that El commissioned the painting, we get a shot of the mirror where they swap places.

The switching of frame placement suggests that something is off, and mirrors in film can be used to show deception. The shot supports the idea that Will is not being fully truthful, which is backed up by what we already know. Each mirror shot is also prompted by a shot of Jonathan, suggesting that this is always from his point of view. We also know that he was able to see through Will's lie, so that supports this idea.

But we don't get the entire monologue from this angle, because really Will isn't entirely lying, he's just lying about whose feelings it really is.

It's no secret that the painting is an expression of Will's love for his friends, but also his romantic feelings for Mike. The positioning of the painting itself as a phallus (take a shot every time I've said "phallus" in a recent analysis) displays this in the visual language of the show along with the written one.

I think that gender and the use of pronouns is important here. Will states the entire monologue using "she" and "her" and places El in the place of himself. So what he's essentially saying "My sexuality is a wonderful thing that can bring both of us joy, but only if comes from a girl." In context Mike seems specifically anxious about El so Will is reassuring him from that angle, but it also stands that Will doesn't see his sexuality and feelings as good enough to cure an ailing Mike.

There was scriptgate and the infamous "I hate who I am" line which everyone remembers where they were for, but when the scripts were said to be fake, this line seemed to no longer hold any weight within the fandom and was widely disregarded. He loves himself, actually!

But legitimacy of the script aside, does this line still ring true? Even if it were real, a unspoken internal dialogue in an action line doesn't matter unless the show actually expresses it. So do they?

After all Will said it himself, "you make [me] feel like [I'm] not a mistake at all. Like [I'm] better for being different." So that must be how he feels, right? And yet—

—he doesn't really look like someone proud of his sexuality, does he?

I find the idea that Will doesn't suffer from any internalized homophobia rather absurd. It's definitely informed by external homophobia, but it would be different if Will fought back, but instead we see time and time again Will turning his pain inward. "Zombie Boy" leads to "It just makes me feel like more of a freak." and "It's not my fault you don't like girls" leads to the destruction of Castle Byers. I know that that line is informed by Mike's internal projection and might not be intended to be homophobic, although the statement still is homophobic despite intent. If Will knows he is gay and just heard that from his friend, of course he's going to take it that way. We see a little bit of Will standing up for himself, although this usually results in Will apologizing or not accepting apologies from others even when he deserves it. The bedroom scene in Dear Billy is a big step forward because not only does Mike apologize and assert that Will wasn't in the wrong, but Will actually listens.

It is true that Will accepts that he is gay and doesn't seem to fight it, although as others have pointed out, this doesn't necessarily mean that Will is necessarily proud of who he is. The van scene is just another example of Will taking that external pain and forcing it inward. There is likely to be consequences resulting from his lie that affects all three of them, but Will has decided to go a route that (he believes) will benefit Mike and El and only cause himself pain.

Look at this way. Let's say that Will hadn't lied about the painting being from El, that he was totally honest about the painting coming from him, but Mike didn't understand it as a romantic gesture. Not only would this not really make sense, and require Mike to be a level of oblivious on an absurd level, but it would also communicate something completely different. The new meaning would be this: Will is proud of his sexuality and able to take ownership of it, and the trouble comes from Mike not understanding. The conflict is now completely external.

I've seen debate on whether or not Mike really did understand what Will was saying although I think that's beside the point. If Mike did understand that Will was talking about himself, then this was not communicated to Will. The above scenario leads the conflict to be solely relieved by Mike finally understanding, and while there is surely to still be an external conflict between Will and Mike, Will's conflict of sexuality remains to be internal. Even if Mike did tell Will that he knew it was from him, this wouldn't necessarily solve Will's problem. The remedy to Will's internal conflict can only come from himself, by being able to proudly put his name to his painting.

[theyluvlyss]

𝐄𝐚𝐬𝐲 𝐎𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐲𝐞𝐬

《 ♡ 》 headcannons

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 :

while it's always fun to imagine (haha, get it💀) what it'd be like for him to be your best friend or your boyfriend, there's times when you yearn for that tension. that something in between that's more than a platonic relationship, but just short of being a lover. and I'm here to revive that feeling of what it'd be like for bruce yamada to have a crush on you...

𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 :

fem!reader x bruce yamada - she/her/her pronouns!

𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐞 :

70s-80s - the grabber doesn't exist

𝐓𝐖/𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 :

I actually don't think I cussed at all (rare lyss achievement) (unless you count abbreviations💀) - fluff, fluff, fluffff! very cute and sweet - bruce being his golden boy self💛💚

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ...𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

Bruce having a crush on someone is so OBVIOUS and pathetic (but like in a cute puppy way lmao🐶😙). Definitely the type that goes out of his way to hide it and whisper and giggle around like it's some huge secret, but mf, you told all of your friends, your baseball coach, half the members on the team, your entire family, your crush’s entire family, the stray dog, and the pizza delivery man😐😭💀.

By the time he's going out of his way to woo his person of interest, they pretty much already know and are either elated to reciprocate his fond acts, or are swift to let him down easy (although the latter is rare, because, well… it's Bruce lol).

But with you, reader… for some reason, I feel like you somehow wouldn't know. Bruce will go through his normal routine - shy smiles, hushed whispers whenever you're near, etc. Best believe your parent(s), his friends, your friends, the wind, the trees, and even the damn walls already know, and if they could talk, they'd tell you, because you somehow have no clue. Brain absolutely empty on the knowledge that Bruce Yamada fancies you and is planning on making moves sometime soon.

And his reasonings, that special little thing that drew him to you, was probably the fact that you had never paid him any mind to begin with. You didn't dislike him, but you had no interest in him, either, like most other girls and guys did.

No strong desire to acknowledge him unless he did so first, no needs to be around or find excuses to hang out with him. Hell, even when you two passed in the hallways, he'd have to wave to you first just to get your attention. Not that he minded, but he just wasn't used to that, so he was intrigued.

Now, I'm not trying to say he has a big head or that he's egotistical or anything. If anything, he really liked that you were not consistently fawning over him and pursuing something fake in order to have his name in your mouth. Not to mention, he did genuinely find you interesting for other reasons.

A reader (clearly💀✋🏽), close-knit to your group of people, observant, and definitely easy on the eyes, all he was ever doing was making sure that his remained on you. Even when you caught him, he wouldn't shy away from smiling even wider, sending you a wave that you'd hesitantly return, just for him to refocus himself back on the lesson or his friend group or whatever else it was that should've been holding his attention instead of you.

This is how it would start. Him making it very obvious he had some sort of interest in you, but not the best at relaying what kind of interest.

To you, it really could've been anything. Was he making fun of you? Did he know something about you that you didn't? Was it your appearance? Something wrong or out of place? The possibilities seemed endless, and they only dwindled when, more and more, Bruce attempted to weasel his way into your life “casually”.

I put “casually” in quotes because it was anything but that💀.

Mans literally walked up and insisted on knowing what it was that you were reading, forcing you to swallow your pride and reveal *insert your answer here lol* which had him then pressing for more information. And while this was rattling at first, he was determined to have you be more and more comfortable around him until the word “friend” left your mouth first.

He'd rather you take control of the labels instead of him placing them upon you two, an indicator that he was doing something right rather than coming off as pushy. And once you had done so - “Bruce, you didn't have to. We're friends, you don't owe me anything :).” - that's when he'd up the antics.

Like I've mentioned before in another post, he is a true giver. A giver of words, gifts, affection, etc. So naturally, he's throwing you compliments left and right, being reassuring and supportive when you need him to be, encouraging you to come to him for help with any and everything, gifting you things ranging from small and meaningful to large and random; you name it, he was doing it.

Call it a courting speed-run. Not in the sense that he's literally taking things too fast or faster than you'd like, but I just mean he's quite the natural charmer and well…

Bitch it's working🤷🏽‍♀️😆.

The only times when things could come to a complete halt is when he's jealous. If he's jealous. I feel as though this would be a rare feat for Bruce. He's always been a very secure and comfortable guy, very easy-going. Like I've mentioned before, he wants you to take the lead when it comes to labels, and he figures that if the label isn't “boyfriend-girlfriend” “dating” “together romantically” “significant other” or anything else of that nature, then what right does he have to be feeling envy towards anything or anyone else you give your attention to?

To put it simply, Bruce and jealousy are not a thing unless and until you two are officially together. And even then, should y'all get together and should he feel there's even an ounce of a threat, his natrual response it to just kill ‘em with kindness.

It's his default setting😭 - no one can be upset or mad at or resentful of him when he's just such a stand-up, charming guy.

Someone's flirting with you right in front of him, you introduce them out of obliviousness to the other guy's antics, and all Bruce does is flash that smile and offer his hand to shake - “Hey, nice to meet you! I'm Bruce Yamada. Cool jacket, by the way. Is that real leather? Those are hard to find!” - the other guy doesn't know whether he wants to continue flirting with you anymore out of respect for Bruce, whom of which they just met and already love lmao, or begin flirting with him instead because, well… they just met and they already love him!

There's hardly any room for jealousy when there's no long-lasting competition. Plus, when it comes to objects/events/close friends and family, he's more often than not encouraging you to indulge further, maybe even finding ways to join. It's what he would want upon telling someone else his interests in baseball, style, music, etc…

He wants that for you as well, and he's more than happy to be the person for that. More than happy to ensure that you're happy above all else because if there's one thing he was absolutely sure he loved about you, it was you being content♡.

Meanwhile… jealousy rising within you is a different story entirely🥴💀.

While you try not to allow instances to be frequent, and you've done your best to accept that, “My crush/best friend is popular. Of course people are going to flirt with him sometimes…” those factors really didn't do much to ease any tension whenever a girl would shove herself between you and Bruce just to make it known she was trying her hand at flirting with him, regardless of if he had previously expressed any infatuation with you or not...

“Brucie, hi…!!”

“Brucie…?” You'd murmur to yourself in disdain, staring with a quizzical expression etched onto your face while he all but smiled and greeted the girl with the same elated tone.

“Oh, hey, what's up?”

“I'm having a party this weekend, ya’ know? My birthday landing on a Saturday and all.”

“Wow, that sounds awesome! Does it have a theme?”

“Oh my god, how'd you guess…?! It's 'Hawaiian Paradise', complete with a beach theme for the pool and everything. Who knows, maybe you'll get to catch me in my new bathing suit if all goes well - if you wanna come, of course.”

At one point, subtle hint drops and sparkly-eyed looks into his own got tiring for you. It was only natural you gave into your spite some of the time…

“Aww, that sounds really fun!" You'd chirp, faking a warm grin before breaking the "bad" news you had just come up with. "Too bad he can't make it. We actually already had something planned that day🤕.”

“We did😃?”

“Yup😬😀.”

“What, like… like a date?” The girl would ask, her hopes dwindling by the second at your sure words.

“...” And with all eyes on you, you decided in the moment that a slight loss of your dignity was worth it to shoo the girl flirting with your crush away from the scene. Away from the two of you and farrrr away from him…

“Yup.”

“Welp, you heard the lady…" Bruce would agree gingerly, shooting off a giddy smile and wrapping and arm around your shoulders. "We gotta date that day, and who am I to skip out on such a pretty face?”

“Oh… Well, okay… See you, then.”

And sure, while Bruce had enough sense to spare you in such a situation, it didn't mean he wouldn't be throwing lighthearted teases your way after the fact…

“If I'd known that me going to another girl's house would finally get you to go out with me, I would've planned this all myself way sooner.”

“Bruce, pleas-”

“-No, no, don't let me steal your thunder. You're a cute actress when you're all robbed of my attention.”

“😐…”

With all of these factors about Bruce combined - his gift giving, complimenting, dotingness, teasing rambles about you liking him, his charming nature, etcetc. - confessing to you actually becomes a lot harder than one thinks. While he's gotten over the nerves and fear of rejection that came with doing so, it was you actually taking him seriously that became his biggest obstacle.

I imagine there having been literally several instances where this man has confessed to you, and you're just so sure it's another one of his little, “I know you love me😙🤭.” smug typa things that you kinda just, “Harhar, you're very sweet, Bruce, now help me carry this in…” y'know, laugh it off.

Meanwhile, in his head, he was being 1000% fr, and lowkey just poured his heart out to you😃🥲…

But, by the time he wants to try again, overthinking prevails, and he's just letting you assume it was all a part of his loveable charisma. By maybe the third-fourth-fifth time of this routine, though, he'd lock in and get serious💀. He'd confess, you'd brush it off, but this time-

“No, (Y/N), I'm being serious. I've liked you a long time now, and I know it might be kind of…sudden for you… but it's not for me.” Etcetc., insert the rest of a love spill here because I'm too lazy to fluff it out myself lol and there you are, standing, wide eyed and heart swelling because he's really liked you this whole time and YOUR DUMBASS HAS BEEN LETTING IT SLIP FROM ONE EAR AND OUT OF THE OTHER, OH GOD, YOU MONSTER-!!!😫💔‼️

Jkjk I'm playin' lol🤭😹.

But, with such tensions, it definitely makes for a sweet moment and results in you two beginning a wonderful relationship. Not to mention, y'all do become an IT couple, like, once again, POWER DUO. So truly, it all works out for the best🤷🏽‍♀️.

𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞 !!

...next up is billy✨️.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ...𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ...𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 :

@in3rci4

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 :

1,894 words

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬 :

none :(

[olderthannetfic]

Apparently my fanfic helped someone in my readership realize he's agender because reading about a character who has zero attachment to the concept of gender, does not feel like any gender, doesn't care about pronouns being used for them and wants to dress any way they want without anyone gendering it really resonated with him and he did some soul-searching afterwards. And I love that for him, truly, I do. But what surprised me is that he really thought that "everybody but trans people" didn't like being associated with a gender, didn't feel like any gender, didn't care about pronouns and didn't have any attachment to the idea of gender. He thought we were all just going along with it because it's just what you do in society and everyone actually felt roughly the same as he did about it.

I was surprised, because although I'm neurodivergent, I had inferred fairly early on in life that people are pretty attached to these things on a genuine level. So I asked him how he arrived at that conclusion and he said that the way his very conservative, Republican family - which is mostly men, he was raised by his dad and grandfather, alongside his brothers - talked about being a man made it sound like an awful, arduous task that you have shoved onto you and can't escape but being a woman also sucked in similar ways according to them. Thus he arrived at the conclusion that nobody actually likes being a gender, you just have to put up with being one. And the fact that he had to put up with it was immensely depressing to him because he hated both of what he perceived as the available options.

Somehow my dinky little Reader POV fanfic where I made the Reader Character agender because I dislike how many Reader fics portray being an AFAB person who identifies as a woman... that little fanfic, without any ships in it, without any deep lore dives, without the things that this fandom usually likes, managed to plunge this reader into total gender euphoria because it made him pluck up the courage to wear something pink, let him know you don't have to be a man or a woman, and told him you're not a bad NB if you use any pronouns and you're AMAB.

And like... I know fandom is a shitty, hostile place a lot of the time. Especially in my fandom, it's a disaster. But reading the mountain of text he posted about how in the two weeks since he realized he's agender, his depression has lessened so much and he hasn't thought about suicide once... I think I remember why I got into writing in the first place, now. It's not just to tell fun stories. It's to tell fun stories about people that don't conform to the white cishetallo culturally Christian secular middle class able-bodied cookie-cutter bullshit that media is still drowning in. Because sometimes somebody is drowning and they think it's mandatory and fiction can tell them, "It's not, actually."

Nobody I know IRL likes the idea of fanfic because why write if you're not going to make money from it? But honestly I feel like this kind of moment has a value money can't really produce.

Sorry, I know I'm rambling. I just thought I'd briefly provide a small break from the sea of negativity in your inbox to share how fanfic and fandom can be good, instead of always being bad, as is so often the way fandom gets framed these days.

--

[heartfullofleeches]

Just a random ramble about Cholly. (Also couldn't remember the pronouns so I stuck with He/They since I think I remember those being used but I apologize if it's incorrect!)

My brain is filled with Cholly for some reason and I just imagine them wearing the goofiest halloween costumes. Like the classic ones but having a silly gag. Vampire costume would probably involve them being caught having "blood" on his mouth but he pulls out tomato juice. Frankenstein (I know thats the doctor but for simplicity sake I'm calling the monster that) costume would be normal except he shocks himself with electricity. Unlike Frankenstein however, he shows that skeleton and black border cartoons use as he is zapped. Although his body is a mystery with how they can contort themself so those bones are just for show I'm pretty sure. Ghost costumes would definitely result in him being able to float while wearing it. Like it's just a white sheet over their head but when you pull it off he stays hovering in the air for a second but looks down and falls upon realization he can't fly. I feel like a mummy costume would just be him using toilet paper to wrap up people. He may wear it and then spin it off and wrap another person with it OR instead just pull it out and wrap others. Idk my brain is rotting and I think of the stuff cartoon logic can be applied to and Cholly just fills my brain perfectly.

Sorry if I bothered you with this! Just wanted to ramble a bit about Cholly :D

Never apologize when it comes to rambling about Cholly. I wholeheartedly advocate for more. You don't understand how much I love this goofy toon and would ramble about them daily if I didn't feel I was dumping too much about them at one time. They are so bby girl and such a delight to write for. (For future reference Cholly literally does not care about what pronouns are used for them as they are simply Cholly) For the Ghost costume I could see them doing a gag of drinking "poison" (maybe paint thinner?) and actually "dying" to become a ghost. (They'll be fine so no worries). Still throws on the sheet to spook their darling when the time comes. Probably throws it over their shadow instead and stands behind Reader, transparent and floating a couple inches off the ground. Uses their new abilities to peep on them before missing being able to touch Reader and hoping back in their old skin. - "Whatcha think of my new look?" It's certainly a look. Not the most original, but still quite cute. The trace of the rabbit's pointy ears stick out like a sore thumb from the sheet they wore. You could already imagine their cheeky grin, and the twinkle in their eyes hidden behind those big black circles cut through the blanket. You couldn't wait to see it. "Looking great, Cholly- just one little thing." The Ghost tilts their head, cloth bunching up just enough for you to make a grab at it with zero issue. "What's that?" "I already miss your pretty face." Lunging for the sheet, you yank it off their head in one fell swoop. Your speed surprises even you which boils to confusion as the dust settles. They aren't there. You've seen a number tricks from the colorful character, but there was always some trace of their presence life behind. You look to your right, then your left. "Cholly?" "Still right behind ya, Doll." You spin on your heels. It takes a minute for your eyes to pull away from the blank wall behind you and instead train on the head poking through it. Cholly waves, elbow propped on thin air and hand rested beneath their chin. Watching the quickness of your chest increase, their smile grows. "Hiya, Gorgeous~" You scream. Cholly snickers, eyes shut with the violent bounce of their shoulders. They let a surprise, elated gasp as their eyes widen beneath the see through lense of their kids. "Wow! I can see you even with my eyelids closed! Ghost life just keeps getting better and better." You march over to them, reaching out only to touch solid wall. "Are... are you...?" "Dead?" Cholly scoffs. "Pfft- Course not!.. I mean I am a ghost, but it's a toon thing. I can change back whenever I want to." You let out a sigh of relief. "Good..." "By the way.... If you ever need a hand in the shower, I could lean two. Missed a couple spots while you were in there earlier." "Cholly!" "Think I hear the stove runnin'. Better go catch. Catch ya later, Gorgeous." Bringing their hands up to the sides of your face, you feel the ghostly imprint of their lips upon yours. Only downside to their new form was they couldn't kiss you with the intensity and passion brew inside them whenever in your company. They wink as your brain redirects from the sweet gesture back to the topic of their little peeping session, and fazes out through the wall before you had the chance to chew them out.

[autism-sprinkles]

okay i SUPPOSE i will make an introduction post.

SMALL DNI I DIDNT THINK I'D NEED. dni if you're a proshipper/comshipper, overly anti mcyt, a nsfw account, pro endo or endo neutral, pro israel, or like. generally dislike any of my identities,,

hai ! ! i go by many names (namefluid), but my Main Names are guppy, selen, melinoë (meli for short, not mel unless i'm in a melinoë hades ii shift), polites, and mlem. feel free to ask for what names I prefer currently!! :3 usually I prefer other names over these ones they're just like. backups so you have a name to refer to me with

i'm a minor ! ! (14 Years Of Age)

i am a therian (european pine marten, black footed ferret, death song [httyd], and norwegian forest cat), otherkin (mainly fae but there r others), fictionkin, copinglink, and autolink haver, and i also have Many f/os

i am asexual, aroflux, queerplatonic, androflexible, poly (i have Six Whole Gay People I Love [i don't like the partner label >:(]) and genderflux (currently a girlthing!) who also has tons of xenogenders, and I use she/it pronouns [it/its, she/her] and a shit ton of neopronouns (you'll have to. Ask for those)

i am diagnosed autistic!!! also (self diagnosed) adhd, as well as suspected bpd and some other disorders :>

i am pagan ! ! :) i use the looser term because hellenism is Too specific and not entirely fitting and i would consider myself an aphrodite devotee (although i do plan to worship other deities aside from her)

i pretty frequently use cat puns as a typing quirk of sorts ! ! the most common one is me using /paws instead of /pos but I also sometimes say fur instead of for and such :3

i have Way too many interests and fixations to list here!! I might make a Seperate Post for that. but currently my main fixations are hades 1 & 2, vtubers (my oshis are all of holostars, dokibird, vantacrow bringer, vezalius bandage, and korone inugami), autism smp, making stimboards, dungeons and dragons, falsettos (2016 revival), project sekai: colorful stage, and epic: the musical.

i am Technically a quotev migrant (url was .heartsiabyul), but i joined maybe a week or two before quotev fucked it all up, so I wouldn't say im Fully a quotev migrant.

i also am very very fond of music!! i can Not function without it at All. i have So many favorite bands/artists but my Main favorites are set it off, paramore, fall out boy, mitski, pierce the veil, beartooth, babymetal, and will wood.

my alterhuman sideblog is @windwings !!

my VERY OWN stimboard account is @sunshower-stimz

my tag for teaching my Actual Real Life Mother how to use tumblr is #instructing the woman on how to be the tumblrrrrrrrrrrr

my asks tag ! is #aeolus' asks

my Personal Post tag is #melinoë.txt

and my Art tag is #melinoë.png

I probably have Forgotten some things but I can always Edit this Later.,

blinkies dump

[fatuifucker]

third stream: desire for approval

[art cr: kuroume_1024 on twt]

bratty trans! streamer! scaramouche x dom fem-sex reader (they/them pronouns used for reader)

SUMMARY = how far would you go for attention?

WARNINGS = please view the sucker series masterlist for the full warnings! smut, penetration (reader giving), brat taming, asphyxiation, boobplay, use of the word “cunt”, use of pet name "angel" + "cumslut" + similar language, scara has nipple and navel piercings, womb tattoo, lingerie, self-sexualisation, codependence, unhealthy relationship, suicide ideation, self-harm, gender dysphoria, transphobia, attempted self-mutilation, implied domestic abuse

W/C = 2.6k

A/N = my word count is getting higher and higher be proud of me!! i was actually intending on writing a valentine's fic instead but uh ig you can take this as the late valentine's day fic instead lol. this may be my last x reader for a while for i would like to focus on more character x character. there are some zines im interested in participating and i want to have fics that i can use for my portfolio bc i don't think character x readers do good for zines lol oh yeah also little shoutout to the usernames featured in scara's stream!!

TAGS = @midnxght-sweet-time, @barbatosfavouritenun, @edenialucas, @huboi, @nejibot, @yumixxn, @teallapril

P-chan should be cute, pretty, handsome. Appearance-wise, they are perfect. Their gender doesn't matter but I want someone with a body like mine. I don't like nuisances so they have to be calm and collected. They have to be rational so they can comfort me and stop me from making impulsive decisions.

I want them to be independent but not too independent. They'll need me to command them like a pet. Maybe like a bunny? They could be that innocent-looking type but is secretly horny for me hehe. I'll have to work out the details later. But it's fine even if they are unsure about their personality. People like that tend to rely on the self-assured more. Maybe I could even dress up in the clothes I can't wear.

They won't be able to live without me.

—

“Ohh…it’s soh gud,” Scara moans, her tongue trailing up the melting popsicle before sucking on it. “Mmm…I might get addicted...”

The stream chat floods with comments; majority of it being provocative remarks. Just the reaction she intended. Although Scara hates to be sexualised by her fans, she knows that suggestive content rakes up the viewer count the fastest.

Almost halfway to a month, yet she hasn’t even reached half a million yet. She doesn’t have much time so even if that means that she has to whore herself like this…

“Mmm it’s sticking all over my fingers…” Scara licks the vanilla cream off her fingers, exaggerating her noises as she continues sucking on the popsicle. “It’s a good thing I took off my gloves. Or else it would have been allll over me.”

cauldron-of-anon: you know what else is creamy and drips all over

eunchaeluvr: I LOVE ICE CREAM

bubiblossom: god Im so happy I was born

cinshaberu: big…

leefrfr: that looks good

yourmomsucksme: YESYESYESYESYES

vermillionbun: THANK YOU SCARA

Scara giggles as she licks a strip up the popsicle. Hm, but it’s about time she ended the stream. All this sugary sweet stuff is cloying…ugh. She finishes the popsicle sensually and cleans her hands with a wet wipe.

“Thank you for the meal, it was delicious. I have to meet up with a friend so I’ll respond to the superchats another time.” Scara blows a kiss, mouse hovering over the ‘end stream’ button. “So long suckers!”

—

You’ve reached another milestone today. It’s funny how the other day, both you and Kunihiko were worried about his stagnancy. Today, he has surpassed 50k subscribers. Since this genre of streams garners the most viewers, maybe it’s okay to ask him to do more sexy streams. Probably not too much though. You don’t want Scara to come out as just another female streamer selling her body for clout. Conspiracy theories seem to do well…that goes for her ‘Scara Tries Things’ series. You’ll have to make her work harder these upcoming days, especially since she’s been slacking off lately. You’ve been trying not to push Kuni too hard but—

You blink as your phone is snatched away from you. “You’re still doing work?”

“Yes, that’s my job as your producer.” You stare at Kuni.

Your boyfriend scowls, grabbing your forearm. “Right now I need you to do your job as my partner.”

You don’t make any effort to resist as Kuni drags you like a ragdoll, grunting when he tosses you onto the bed. You sit there, waiting for Kuni to finish changing and give you your orders for the night. In the meantime, you occupy yourself by looking around.

Kuni didn’t have any requests for a themed room so you chose a classy one. The room was laden with rich reds and blacks, a jacuzzi and a drawer stocked with condoms, lube, all the essentials. In truth, it looked like any expensive hotel room, except that the fee for this one was much cheaper that any 5 star hotel. The good thing about love hotels is that they are soundproof — meaning Kuni is going to make you fuck him all night so he can savour the experience of moaning as loud as he wants without alerting the neighbours. Speaking of which, he wanted you to wear something, didn’t he? It should be the one on the table…

Unveiling the contents of the paper bag reveals an angel-themed lingerie set. The bodysuit is made out of fine white satin, decorated with ribbons at the shoulder straps, tulle around the hips, and etched with cloud patterns. Matching the set of white ribbon garters are sheer cloud-covered unattached sleeves that look like it extends past your elbows, looping around the middle finger to partially cover the top of your hands and leaving the rest bare. Without batting an eye, you shed your clothes off and dress yourself in the gifted outfit.

“Are you done?” Kuni calls from the bathroom after a few minutes.

“Yes.”

You sit on the bed, watching as your boyfriend exit the bathroom. A devilish grin rests on his carmine-lined lips as he sashays in black stilettos. He’s dressed head to toe in black leather — from the bodysuit, to the arm sleeves and stockings — but the bodysuit specifically emits a sort of polychromatic glow, shifting to a shimmering purple under the fluorescent light. The whole outfit hugs his body tight, squeezing his body in certain areas that pulls attention to the exposed skin spilling out his thighs and his chest… Your gaze darts back to his eyes, heart thumping upon realising that he is right in front of you.

Kuni chuckles. “What? You embarrassed?” He takes your hand, placing it on his chest. “Don’t be. I wore this just for you, you know?” Entranced, your eyes follow the movements of his other hand, watching as he unzips the zip on his waist, pushing down the waistband to display the pink, heart-shaped tattoo on his pelvis; resembling those typical womb tattoos you see in hentai. “You’re my sweet, obedient angel. And you’re going to reward this naughty succubus for working so hard for the both of us.” Kuni shoves you down on the bed, letting you sit in your state of shock as he purrs into your ear. "Get your toys. They are on the bedside table."

Sure enough, there's your bullet vibrator and buttplug; the ones Kuni asked you to bring today. You turn the motor to its maximum speed, goosebumps all over your skin as it makes contact with your sex. Next goes the plug, which you make sure to lubricate before inserting it into your puckered hole. When you lift your head, Kuni’s stinging violet gaze is locked upon you, a smirk on his carmine lips as he plays with his covered clit. You immediately turn your attention down, removing his underwear with hurried fingers and latching onto the swollen bub.

Soft thighs wrap around your head as your tongue switches its focus on his leaky cunt. Juices drip all over your tongue as you dive into him, eating him like a gourmet buffet. The whir of the vibrator reverberates off the insulated walls, rousing the fire in your groin that stupefies you into shaking your ass, savouring the sensation of your hole squeezing around the plug. Your eyes flit back up to your lover, his lust-filled eyes fixed onto you. His cunt oozes with ambrosial nectar, and you lap it up like a starved creature, goaded by his saccharine moans. A squeal reveals the arrival of his high, manicured nails digging into the sheets before vitality deserts him, leaving him laying limp on the bed.

The strained, rapid breaths becomes the only source of sound in the room once the motor is turned off. What fills the space of silence is rustling, followed by a click and then followed by a wet noise of viscous liquid. Kuni spreads his legs as your body hovers over him, a tired look on his face. He senses your hesitation.

“Don’t give that look,” he sneers. “I already gave you permission to ruin me. Unless…” he juts his bottom lip out, eyebrows lowered in a display of mockery. “you’re backing away now because you realised you can’t do it. No matter how cool, calm and controlled you think you are, I’m the one who holds dominion over you. Without my orders, you’re hopeless. You don’t know what to do because I’m the one who holds the power. Without me, you’re— ah!!”

His back arches into a crescent as the strap spears him without warning. Without giving him time to adjust, you’re grinding your hips against his, slamming the cock in and out while he cries in pleasure.

“Yes, yes, yes! Use me! Break me! Fix me! Oh god, please, please, please—!”

The force of your thrusts jostles Kuni against the bed, incandescent light shifting the polychromatic purples of his collar that just beckon you to wrap your hand around the thin neck. The added pressure around his neck makes him mewl in delight, hands guiding your free hand up his hips, past his navel piercing, and landing on his chest.

“Touch my boobs…” he rasps.

“I don’t recall giving you permission to order me around,” you say with a bite in your voice, tugging on one of his nipple piercings to make him squeak. “Do I have to punish you for your insolence?” Nonetheless, you turn your attention to his chest, peppering it with kisses and hickeys, suckling on his nipples, all to make the little brat writhe under you. 

“(Name)...” he whines. “Punish me, ruin me, I don’t care! I don’t care about anything as long as you need me— aah…think of me and no one else! Want only me, love only me, love me, love me, love— haaah~!! I’m cumming, I’m—!”

His orgasm is signified by a shower of translucent strings streaming out of his soaked cunt, essence staining the floor and sheets in splatters. Kuni wheezes for air once you release the hold on his neck, arms wrapping around you as he basks in the momentary peace.

“Are you okay? Was I too rough?”

“I…I can do it again…” he says in between breaths, pushing himself up with his elbows. “Come on, I’m your…I’m your succubus, aren’t I? You…you have to punish me…”

You shrink back. “Kuni, I really think you need a break—”

A sudden weight thrown onto you interrupts your monologue. You blink, seeing your smirking boyfriend has switched positions with you; with you now underneath him while he’s on top of you.

“Oh I’m much stronger than you think. This body is curated for you…for all of your desires and wants. So, do your worse,” He cusps your cheek, lips covering over yours. “and dig in.”

Kuni kisses you with fervour, determined to infect you with his lust. An unwelcome sense of unease churns instead.

—

The sharp pain makes Kuni's body tingle with adrenaline, foggy eyes watching scarlet sanguine spill out the wound. His chest rises and falls as he pants, shaking fingers bringing the bloodied blade to slash an untouched portion on his wrist. He lets the high consume him, a penumbra that suppresses the emotional turmoil threatening to boil over the messed up pot that is him. Yet that high is all-consuming, and it begs for more. Cloudy indigos flit up to the mirror, a blurry figure reflecting back his ugly existence and that ugly chest that proves of his inferiority as a man.

"Cut your hair? But you’re the most beautiful with long hair."

"Where did you get those shorts? A pretty girl like you should wear dresses."

"Why does she dress like that?”

"Huh? But…you’re a girl."

Shut up, shut up.

”Kuniko, do you really think that anyone in this world will accept you as a boy?”

Shut up, shut up, shut up shut up shut up—

"Do you want to bleed out?"

Kuni ignores the way his raised hand trembles, grumbling as he glares at the person standing by the door. "Wasn't intending to. But if I die from blood loss, it wouldn’t be a bad thing either."

"I would be upset." You take a step forward, stopping when he inches the razor closer to his chest. "You know, if you wanted to get rid of them, we could always visit a professional. Surgery would be safer–"

“Do you think I give a shit about my safety?!” Kuni screams, beads of tears pouring like a waterfall. “I want to die! I don’t want to exist anymore, why don’t you get it?!”

“What makes you think that I don’t?”

“You…you…” Kuni swallows, his dry mouth making speech a burden.

“Maybe I don’t want to live either," You say. "but I still want you to survive.”

Kuni laughs dryly. “How selfish of you.”

“How ironic of you of all people to say that."

He doesn’t respond to that.

“I need you just as much as you need me. We can’t survive without each other.”

“I know.”

“I’m here because you want me to stop you. You want me to make you feel better.”

“...Yes.”

“How do you want me to do that?"

“...Hold me."

A trace of warmth swathes him; barely there but still enough. Kuni leans against the cold wall, quiet sobs echoing through the tiny room, caged in this claustrophobic space. The air is cold and suffocating, but he knows it will be okay because you’re here. It will be okay, because (Name) is here. (Name) is always with me. (Name) can never leave me. He closes his eyes, letting your gentle scent waft into his nose. He takes apart the scent: an amalgamation of lavender, sandalwood and sage, like the aromatherapy candles he lights. If he focuses, he can feel your warm, calming breaths brushing against his ear, reminding him that you’re there. You’ll always be there for him, and nothing will change that. It takes a while but slowly, his breaths even out, settling into a steady cadence.

You let go of him. His eyes are fixed on the floor.

“Are you okay?” You ask, caressing his dishevelled locks.

His gaze doesn’t leave the floor. “I can handle more than this.”

The sound of muffled shouting interrupts the quiet conversation. Kuni winces, looking at the direction of the disturbance. He recognises the voices but tunes out the repetitive string of words, palms cupping his ears while his back slides down the wall. The voices get louder and louder, accompanied by clashes of porcelain and the collide of wood against other household objects. He doesn’t register that he’s shaking until the familiar warmth surrounds him again.

“Let’s watch KAngel.”

—

[You received a text from Kuniku<3!]

Kuniku<3: (name)

Kuniku<3: ur asleep right?

Kuniku<3: couldnt sleep so i went out for a walk lol

Kuniku<3: i brought along the switchblade u bought me

Kuniku<3: in case a perv wants to catch a case hehe

[Kuniku<3 is typing…]

Kuniku<3: hey

Kuniku<3: you know i hate being alone right?

Kuniku<3: whenever you leave me for too long

Kuniku<3: im afraid that you realised you dont need me after all

Kuniku<3: i have to rely on you

Kuniku<3: but do you still need me?

Kuniku<3: or do i have to make you depend on me more?

[Kuniku<3 is typing…]

Kuniku<3: i want to disappear

Kuniku<3: i want to die

[Message Deleted]

Kuniku<3: hope my favourite cumslut got a good rest <3

Kuniku<3: i’ve been doing a good job right? sooo u will give me a break right?

Kuniku<3: i took the liberty of picking date ideas so what do u wanna do??

[Your answer]

[squeakygeeky]

I Feel You Linger in the Air Novel vs Series

I guess this is a thing I do now. Anyway, I feel like most people who posted about the novel were understandably focused on the ending, but this will be all over the place, full spoilers, this is for if you're interested in how it was adapted but don't actually want to read the novel. I would say I preferred the series since it took full advantage of being a visual medium and also because of the way it expanded on the story.

So the series only covered the first part of the novel, with Jom being transported back to 1928. The novel is first person from Jom's point of view and we really only get Jom adjusting to life in the past and his relationship to Yai.

Jom figures out he's in the past pretty quickly. There's also a mistaken identity thing so he never has to pretend to have amnesia.

Ueangphueng is still his sister's past life, but she's not Yai's sister, just a random neighbor married to Robert and not in a relationship to Mei. Ming is still in love with Mei but she's going to marry someone else, this is just a random thing not important to the plot. Fongkaew's story is kind of similar to the series and so is Khamsaen's, but there's no plot with Robert having done crimes etc. so she and Ueangphueng are just stuck being married to him and having his kids. James is there and flirty with Jom but there's no gay bar. Jom's piglet belongs to Robert and loses the race due to banana shenanigans, I'm sure you were dying to know.

Yai Palathip is 18 and going to be sent off for school and never gets engaged, instead his non-Ueangphueng sister does (happily it seems). No one finds out about Jom and Yai when Jom starts working for him, so there's not really homophobia they deal with, but also no support. They also barely get time together as lovers before Yai gets ripped into the past.

Jom gets transported to the 18th century (I think?) and meets Moustache Commander Yai. I won't go into much of what happens since it's not relevant to the series, but this Yai has no existing connection to Jom, so basically this part is Jom realizing he needs Yai to fall in love with him, which of course is successful because that explains why 1920s Yai was in love with him from the first moment. This is the Yai that gives Jom the tiger ring. Also there is stuff about personal pronouns used in the past: catnip to me.

Jom gets sent back to the present, but weirdly right before the accident. He doesn't check his phone this time but still goes into the River, he just manages to be in slightly better circumstances and gets rescued (by a foreign doctor, my theory is James reincarnated, although there is nothing to support this). He still has the tiger ring on so he knows it wasn't all a dream. When he returns to work on the renovation, he's given a key to a box in the trunk, which has his phone, the letter he wrote (not a letter from Yai), and the theater tickets Jom and Yai never got to use. Then he's told he needs to meet the son of the lady renovating the house, who is Yai Kanthorn of the present day.

1st special is a cute scene of Yai Palathip interacting with his nieces and nephews many years after Jom's disappearance. He became a judge and the family is prosperous because of Jom's advice about the future.

The 2nd special explains that present day Yai is a decendent of Lek, 1920s Yai's brother, so that's how he ended up also being called Yai. His adoptive mom/aunt is Yai's heir, tasked with giving Jom (as far as she knows just a random person of his full name) a key to the box in the chest. She sees his name in an article about a renovation which is why she insisted on hiring him. Yai sees Jom's picture in the article and remembers his past lives, so he goes to Thailand to find Jom.

The 3rd special is Yai and Jom in the present being boyfriends and getting engaged.

There is absolutely no explanation of why Jom time traveled.

[midnight-scugs]

Machines of Wartime AU character study #1: Unparalleled Innocense

Buckle the fuck in folks this is gonna be another long one because I'm passionate about how I characterize them here. Long post again, so more info comes after the cut. Note for reference and clarity that throughout this post UI will be referred to with they/ae pronouns quite interchangeably, so instances of either set are in reference to them.

No real major content warnings here, although I'll give a small warning for self destructive behavior, as well as a more minor precautionary warning for brief mentions of neglect and dehumanization from their admins.

UI is, essentially, a high energy constant stimulation seeker at their core, and a lot of what they do shows it in some way. It's a major reason (along with far less personality shaping going into their generation) behind why they used to be quite mean here before making steps towards improvement. They were never taught a healthy outlet to seek stimulation, so they will try pretty much anything to see what sticks; pretty much anything that gets a form of reaction from others is included in what does stick.

Spreading rumors and other bits of info makes people react, whether good or bad. This means results. People who learn them often further spread them. This means even more results. And when you build a reputation for yourself as "the mean rumor spreader", these results will get back to you all over again. Messages, reactions, more people coming to them to start shit; it's all results and reactions and stimulation. It's an easy way to get what ae want... even if it means people thinking less of aer for it. But hey, can't get lonely if you're constantly too stimulated or too busy seeking more of everything to really think about how nobody quite genuinely likes you! It's easy when you don't let yourself focus on feelings, just shut down any attempts at self awareness!

The reason they're like this, in reality, primarily comes not from being truly mean or spiteful at their core, but just from being built in a way where lack of proper guidance or true care from their creators after creation has left them both feeling a little abandoned ("why bother behaving when nobody cares about me anyway") and physically incapable of tolerating understimulation ("if I'm not doing enough it almost physically hurts"). They have incredibly high processing power; a measurable amount more than even Pebbles, and Pebbles and UI are respectively the first and second iterators of their generation to be created. If they're not using enough of that processing power, it drives them up a wall a little; they genuinely cannot stand being in a state where they're not receiving enough stimulation of some sort. They hate boredom and lack of activity and even just sitting still for too long. Movement, sound, reading messages, running 5 background processes at once, taking on multiple high intensity projects, whatever; it's all the same as long as it gives aer what their systems crave. More stimulation. And saying and doing shit to get reactions is heavily related to that; it's negative stimulation seeking behavior that was never properly taught as "don't do this it's not healthy", because quite frankly aer admins don't care what ae do, as long as ae have a high work output. They're just an iterator after all, right?

And then we come to why they're not really like this anymore, way more toned down in how they act. One big reason is simply time and maturity; they've gained more life experience and kind of just grown away from this sort of behavior in favor of better outlets. They're still young and reckless, but not as overwhelmingly so after a good few decades of time to live and grow. They've seen that it makes people not like them to act like that; even now they still have no real friends due to their reputation. It makes them lonely now that they've calmed down enough to actually think about how others view them instead of living in the moment; they don't want to be lonely. They don't want to be sad. Ae don't want to experience negative emotions, because feelings as a whole tend to be very intense for aer and bad ones really suck to deal with. And they want to get away from these feelings.

Another big reason is because of Pebbles, as was alluded to a little in this post. He's their partner, he cares about them, and they care about him too. For one thing, they don't want their own behaviors to reflect poorly on him by proxy; they're self aware enough now to see that this could happen, and they don't want anyone else to be made to feel like a bad person simply because of being associated with them. They don't want this for someone they love. For another thing, he honestly just makes them feel seen. He can see that they struggle quite badly when understimulated; but unlike aer admins who simply ignore anything that's not work and results and responsibilities, he actually cares enough to help them find a healthy outlet to, well, actually properly stim instead of leaving them to seek unhealthy, and ultimately self destructive since it blows up their ability to maintain friendships, methods. He views them as an entire person deserving of respect, not just a machine with a purpose. That's why they're actually together quite a lot; he's willing to give them what they need to get that stimulation in a more healthy way, whether that be engaging them in direct conversation or letting them constantly fidget with his clothes or just giving them a good squeeze because ae like the feeling. He loves them and cares about them and will go out of his way to keep them happy and engaged and focused on more positive outlets. He involves them in projects a lot because they're actually a very good worker when they care about the task at hand, and they love being delegated tasks to engage with! Giving them more tasks + generally more ideas on how to properly and healthily stim is exactly what they need, and he gives it to aer. It's a big part in why the two of them have a very strong relationship now, the level of genuine care and respect they've cultivated for each other.

They're actually getting a lot better now! They've mostly moved away from the more toxic sorts of behaviors they used to display, since they now have much better outlets. They're not a completely different person personality wise; they're still quite socially driven, and ae do love a good bit of interesting information. They're just mature enough now to not spread things they shouldn't. Ae still don't have true friends really, but they're working towards that and finally starting to gain acquaintances who actually like them and value them for who they are as a person. And they're a lot happier for it; they feel seen and valued and like they have actual reasons to try and be better now. They are loved, they are seen, and they are better off for it.

TL;DR UI is essentially a high powered supercomputer with ADHD that went completely unmanaged for a long time, and as a result they started seeking out negative stimming behaviors. They were never shown anything more healthy as an alternative. They matured over time and were finally shown better stimming methods by someone who cares about them, and it's helped them grow and improve a lot.

[whitebookposts]

alright so now that we're discussing elder headcanons what are your hcs for ayin :3

OH HEY ANOTHER FEW WEEKS HAVE PASSED BEFORE I ANSWERED THIS. HAHA I live in shame every breathing moment <3

ANYWAY!! AYIN!!! OUR FRIEND!!! THE ULTIMATE DAD\MOM\GRANDMA!!! The one who holds so much pain behind their gentle hands.... one of my favorite elders, right behind Priestess (shhhhh let's ignore the fact she isnt even canon). Let's get right to them!!!!

GENDAQUEEEER I am a firm he\she\they Ayin believer (although it does make writing fics with him a bit tricky lol). idk why, but it makes so much sense, both because I feel like Ayin feels love and appreciation towards all gender expressions, be it feminine or masculine, and because I'm projecting my own gender identity onto em. plus, Ayin was called both a he and a they by tgc, and in one of the game's translations (I don't remember the language, unfortunately), Ayin is called "Prairie grandma" instead of Prairie elder. Overall, I feel like Ayin wouldn't care what pronouns you use for her, he is happy with all (projecting again), and they will wear beautiful dresses and gorgeous suits depending on the mood.

PANSEXULAAAA I don't even have any explanation for this one, I just know it on molecular level.

Youngest child syndrome Headcanon that Ayin is the youngest of three kids, having two older twin brothers. Both because it just… makes sense for him to be the youngest (listen. Half of my headcanons are just vibes.), and because when @grapeless-seeds introduced this headcanon to me (using early beta content where it seemed that some spirit memories were actually memories of the elders, and what we concluded was beta ayin was surrounded by two more spirits that looked a lot like them) I fell in love with it immediately. There are so many funny scenarios that can arise from it, esp if Ayin turns out to be taller than her older brothers. This is also a basis for some of my angst for Ayin too, because out of the other elders, Ayin has the most family still up there in the constellation while she is stuck down there (I'm a "elders are fallen stars who crave to get back home" type of fella)

ARTS & CRAFTS Like to think that Ayin is the type of person to always make some sort of pretty trinkets and stuff, often pairing up with Teth to make them. His favorite type of creation though? Clay pots! All the smaller clay pots you see around her temple are handmade by her :) (even though it does get tricky with their big hands :"D)

Hard of hearing Hard of hearing Ayin headcanon blast! I like to think that the reason they have bells on their temple is so that he can hear their calls better since she would have a hard time hearing them from the village. Originally born from noticing the detail that in his cutscene, Ayin needs to look around before spotting you instead of simply following the sound of our footsteps and the flame. He mostly hears either thanks to a special device created by Teth for him, or through the rumbles of the earth around them. Which leads to-

Is this an avatar reference I forgot to mention this in my Teth headcanon list, but I hc that the elders that appear holding the colored light in the cave of Prophecies can manipulate the respective elements. Even more, they could do so even before they were granted these lights, but it was the lights that allowed them to master the skill. So Ayin, as the holder of Earth, is one of the most powerful elders - she can transform the terrain, make plants grow, lift entire islands into the sky (why do you think their temple is so high up), and even change gravity. If such power fell to any other hands but Ayin's who knows what could have happened? Thankfully, Ayin has a very strong connection and respect for the land, coming from a constellation (the way the stars call their families) of farmers (but that is a whole other can of worms) so you can be sure Ayin can be trusted with it. But if they were to use it aggressively…..

I got my ass kicked, I ain't posting that Both because of Ayin's ability to manipulate earth, AND their sheer size and physical strength, if you somehow manage to get into a physical fight with them, expect your ass to get handed to you on a cute hand made plate. But let's be honest if you somehow manage to get such a calm and gentle person like Ayin to fight you, you deserve everything that comes next.

A single mom who works two jobs...... It's already canon that Flight guide was Ayin's apprentice, but my headcanon extends to Sanctuary guide too, and that for both of them, Ayin was not only a master but a parental figure as well. Even though all the other elders told Ayin that it would be silly to raise ancestor children since the ancestor life span is so much shorter and they will see their kids grow and get old and die before them, Ayin still took on the job because she couldn't let these poor kids have no home, ready to face the pain of their death if just she gets to see them grow old and happy. well… they did die earlier than Ayin…. unfortunately, they also died much, much earlier than they were supposed to and Ayin expected. Oops.

This is the part where we get to the horrors During the height of the darkstone era and the fallout that happened after it, Ayin was caught between a rock and a hard place. On one hand, he longed desperately to get back to the stars and reunite with his family, and that, at the time, was believed to be possibly only through continual darkstone use. On the other, as mentioned earlier, Ayin has a great connection to the land and a great love for creatures and nature. We can even see it in their realm, which is the healthiest, most thriving out of all others. I mean, she has a whole ass sanctuary in the Prairie, so it's clear that the preservation of nature was very important to them. So Ayin was deeply conflicted, wanting to return to the stars but knowing it would be at the expense of the land. This desire to go home was what caused her to go with the continual industrialization at first, and the crushing guilt just made them work harder and harder, running themself thin trying to provide enough light from their realm for the growing demand, because hey, if they work themself to exhaustion, they don't have enough time to dwell if their actions are good! Sleep became their coping mechanism. (Might not be super healthy, but hey! At least it's not DRINKING like in early concept art! I still can't believe they were planning to make Ayin a drunk and that the pots were originally there to contain the drink.)

more horrors Such behavior and Ayin's quiet acceptance of the situation continued up until… it couldn't anymore. Ayin couldn't go on like that anymore, she saw her land and her neighbor's lands fall to ruin, more and more people becoming sick, a war waging taking more and more resources and lives…. and the catalyst for it all was the death of both of her apprentices, who died protecting the very same things she taught them to protect. That was the final straw. And Prairie officially joined the resistance.

Oops, still horrors. So you remember that cut-out beta part of the Aurora concert where we saw the elders on the battlefield during the war, with Ayin with Daleth being on the side of the resistance? Yeah, it's a pretty cool basis for this headcanon, BUT ACTUALLY, this idea came to me so much earlier, IN A DREAM. I am not even joking, I had a dream 3 years ago where Ayin was fighting in the war. Speak of Apollo and his prophetic visions, huh? Do you remember how I mentioned that Ayin would be terrifying to fight against due to her control over earth? Yea, let's just say the giant craters on the battlefield in GW weren't always there.

Doomed middle aged yaoi An extension to the previous point, I'm a Tsadi x Ayin fan, and seeing how Tsadi appeared on the other side of the battle on that one cut out segment... well, do what you will with it.

okay back to normal stuff Ayin is really great at putting children to sleep, even the most energetic ones. there is just something about the softness and warmth of his body and the general calming vibes around her that make young children relax. Was really helpful to Priestess when the little twins were full of energy all too late when she had none.

Grandma instinct Don't say you're hungry next to them. Ayin WILL cook a "all you can eat" buffet for you if you do. No one is going hungry if Ayin can help it. Honestly, I know this hc sounds very joky, but I genuinely love the healthy relationship with food Ayin has. It really helps me to not worry about calories and weight gain. I know Ayin would want me to be well fed and eat tasty food first and foremost. :3

Ayin milk

ANDDD this concludes my list for now! In truth, I have so, so much more headcanons about Ayin, but Im getting tired typing all that, besides, many of them will need a much bigges exposition about my world building and general world headcanons for Sky. Hope you enjoyed reading those!

[silken-threads-bah]

can we have a subsystem (up to you the count) w Transmasc Katsuki Bakugo who had a past life as Black Widow from Marvel (he's based off a fanfiction) and whoever else you want (doesn't have to be from the same media)

Hope this is alright. I think I found the fic you are talking about and it seems very interesting, I might end up reading more of it - Raphael

Name: katsuki bakugo, widow, blaze

Age: 17

Pronouns: he/him

Gender(s): transmasc

Orientation: bisexual

Source(s): my hero academia fanfiction

Role: anger holder, host

Personality: he's quick to get angry over small things, but when he's actually mad, he looks incredibly calm and collected. when someone upsets him or people he's close to, he's very quick to get revenge. It's pretty hard to get close to him however, he tries his best to push everyone away despite the fact that he craves close relationships.

Interests: ballet, superhero comics and how the main themes in them have changed throughout the years in response to real life issues, organized crime.

Extra info: he's sassy as fuck and always has a comeback for everything.

Faceclaims:

Name: Taskmaster, Anthony, Tony

Age: mid 30s

Pronouns: he/him

Gender(s): male

Orientation: straight

Source(s): marvel comics

Role: physical protector

Personality: he likes to simply observe what's going on instead of actively interacting with it. He only fronts when there's a serious threat that he doesn't think the others can handle and in doing so will often cause more harm than help. Whenever spoken to, he'll give cryptic answers that don't actually answer anything because he likes to be a little shit like that.

Interests: hate-watching superhero movies

Faceclaims:

Name: spider-man, spidey, peter, parker

Age: 17

Pronouns: he/web

Gender(s): transmasc

Orientation: bisexual

Source(s): tom holland's spider-man

Role: emotional protector, anxiety holder

Personality: he's typically pretty upbeat, preferring to try to look at the bright side of situations instead of wallowing in how bad they may be. Web only fronts around people the subsystem is comfortable around, although he loves to talk to people. Oftentimes him fronting will cause the body to feel the anxiety that web holds, so it's not preferable for others in the system to allow him to front. He's by far the most outgoing and social out of the others though.

Interests: science, especially anything physics and chemistry related. Web loves to explain complex theories and equations and will spend hours researching them if given the chance.

Faceclaims:

Name: all might, hercules, gabriel

Age: mid-30s

Pronouns: he/him

Gender(s): male

Orientation: straight

Source(s): my hero academia

Role: something like a father figure and caretaker

Personality: very confident, never gets shaken even when faced with things that would terrify the rest of the subsystem. He fronts whenever the others are scared and takes control of the situation so that the others don't have to. he's very fatherly and takes others under his wing in order to protect them.

Interests: football, history (especially the world wars, he's very interested in the battle tactics and technology used)

Faceclaims:

[stars-tonight]

hiiiii, it’s been awhile since i’ve done a matchup - so i’m excited to see that your matchups are open! please, take your time with this, there’s no rush! and remember that your super appreciated ;>

i would like a long, romantic matchup please! she/her pronouns, and i would like to be paired with a guy. my ideal partner would be in touch with their emotional side, caring, and attentive to detail. he would also be very hardworking and talk a lot with me be uase i love to yap. bascially i need someone to listen and respond with care ykwim. as for myself, i would describe myself as an academic weapon and constantly busy with extracurriculars. beyond that, i love helping others and socializing a lot. my hobbies include sewing, baking and crocheting. both my love langauge recieving and giving is physical touch. my ideal date is at the aquarium because i could watch the fishes and other sea creatures for HOURS. lastly, my personality type is enjf-t.

thank you again! and moots if you’re interested? don’t stress about having this completed asap! i know how that feels <3

headcanons

🥛 honestly i had a hard time choosing between kita and akaashi for you

🥛 eventually i chose kita because i feel like akaashi overthinks a bit more and kita is a little more emotionally mature / in tune with his own emotions

🥛 kita fits your ideal partner description almost perfectly

🥛 he's super observant and would be so attentive as a partner

🥛 the kind of boyfriend you would never be embarrassed showing off to your friends or your family

🥛 the actual definition of hardworking

🥛 although having a conversation with him can sometimes be a bit confusing since he's rather stoic

🥛 but you'll notice that his eyes soften whenever he looks at you

🥛 and i don't think he'd shy away from talking with someone he cares about

🥛 he'd also be very good at articulating his thoughts so if you ask for his opinion he wouldn't hesitate to tell you the truth

🥛 i think the case with kita is that he just doesn't have a lot to talk about with his teammates besides volleyball so he may come off as scary or unapproachable

🥛 (i'm a lot like him; with my friends i talk a lot but with my teammates there's an inherent distance between us and ig i come off as rude or mean because of it)

🥛 kita's also an academic weapon

🥛 honestly the two of you would be a power couple if you date when you're both in high school

🥛 kita would get teased a little but his teammates would honestly be too scared to make fun of you too much

🥛 kita has that quiet but scary energy and you know he'd always be there to protect you if anyone ever made you feel uncomfortable or upset

🥛 your hobbies line up with kita's personality too; they're really chill and relaxing

🥛 unfortunately i'd imagine that post-timeskip he's pretty busy as a rice farmer so he doesn't have a lot of free time

🥛 but on his days off he'd love spending time with you inside just reading while you sew or crochet

🥛 would somehow pick up crocheting just by watching you and make the most perfect crochet plushie ever and give it to you as a surprise

🥛 kita prefers to show his love through actions so you'll definitely receive the best care with him as your boyfriend

🥛 he'll hold your hand when you're out but definitely won't do any over the top pda

🥛 in private though he'd definitely be more comfortable

🥛 would probably rest a hand on your head when you're cuddling together

🥛 he isn't the type to initiate physical affection but wouldn't shy away if you did

🥛 i headcanon kita as a chill date kind of guy so he'd definitely prefer calmer / soothing places

🥛 an aquarium has the perfect vibes, you'd just be watching the animals for hours on end

🥛 he'd probably bring you into a really cool room with dim lighting where life feels so ethereal (like a room with a jellyfish tank or some glow in the dark tanks)

🥛 so you can get away from the bustle of the rest of the public space and instead just focus on each other <3

runner up for you was akaashi keiji!

A/N: hi moot! i hope you liked your matchup! sorry about the long wait 😣 got writer's block and burnout for a few days and didn't end up doing any of my requests

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

First meditation with Khaos, the vast void of space

Quick warnings: this is a pretty long post, but I'm using it as a way to record everything I remember happening during this meditation so it has things other than just what happened with Khaos! This is also actually originally written weeks ago, I just left it in my drafts for ages whoops.

Another note: I won't be using only she/her pronouns for Khaos in the future, although I don't think they give a singular fuck either way, I just am tired today and wanted to get this posted without having to edit it.

UPG disclaimer. Even the title is UPG, my personal associations with Khaos.

So, I had things to do and decided I wanted to have a proper chat with Loki about it. I started up my meditation music, grabbed whatever crystals felt right, and laid down.

One of the first things they did was hug me. I am someone who has issues with receiving love, and this caught me entirely off guard. Of course I go "wtf bitch you can't do that???" And he basically told me something along the lines of "fuck you I do what I want." (Note: Loki is deeply salty that I cannot remember their actual wording, as it did not have the boundary breaking "I hug you if I want no matter your thoughts on it" implications this wording does. Loki is big on boundaries being respected with me. I feel the need to write that down.)

But we chatted about a spell I was planning, and Loki- who promptly draped himself across a couple logs all dramatically- was very enthusiastic about helping. We went back and forth, I also brought up Apollo to say hello, and then I felt... someone on the edge of things. Apollo was pretty abruptly gone, which makes sense for reasons I'll explain in a moment.

Loki stepped beside me, and sort of had their arm over my shoulders in a distinctly protective manner. Thing is, nothing felt malicious, and I asked them why the hell they seemed so protective when I felt perfectly safe. They explained that I was safe, but "she's pretty fucking intimidating so you might need someone to keep you steady."

Enter Khaos. I realized it was her because instead of a humanoid, or even recognizable form, suddenly within the protected astral space I go when I meditate (I'll just call it "homespace" from now on) is this massive fucking orb of void.

Except this is much bigger, and the orb I was met with was only... "half" of one. Like it'd been sliced, a few solid chunks cut out, like when a video game renders wrong and certain chunks won't load. I actively tried to imagine it as whole, to change it- it wouldn't budge. When I took the above screenshot as a reference, seeing how tiny my character was compared to the in-game thing that I compared Khaos to, it brought a whole new meaning to Loki's explanation as to why it was only half of an orb.

"She's trying not to scare you."

Loki assured me that they would be with me the whole time, that we were not leaving homespace and the orb was completely within the protection of homespace, and we walked in. It was pitch black, void all around, and I could see Loki as if he was lit up in the middle of day but that was it. Khaos came out of the void, sort of appearing out of the "wall" of darkness- being formed from it herself as if it were liquid. I asked her what she had to say.

She looked at me, just smiled, and said "good luck."

I admit, I laughed. I pointed out that THAT sounded ominous as hell. I knew what she meant- she was genuinely wishing me luck, since I have a lot of growth ahead of me and working with her is going to be a pretty big deal for me. But at the time, I couldn't help but laugh. Later, when I was recounting this to my mom, I got a very clear image of hands of darkness holding a bright orb of light. Offering it to me. It wasn't just wishing me luck. It was a gift.

Not long after that, I was suddenly made more aware of my physical body in the form of an ant crawling across me. I got the ant off of me, and went back- only to find that I couldn't just go back to the void we were standing in. Loki met me where we originally had started, and confirmed that I wasn't able to go into her space uninvited. I told them I couldn't go through the process of getting further into a meditative state and walking back into the void, and they said it was okay.

And I swear to you, I'm not fucking with you when I say this is exactly what was said next.

Me: "So... It's so interesting- Is the only way to talk to her to go into the void, be consumed by her energy entirely?"

Khaos, suddenly behind me: "Sort of, but not entirely no."

Me, finding out that my startle reflex is just as bad in the astral: "JESUS FUCKING CHRIST-"

Khaos: "No." (As in no, she's not Jesus. /Lh I just feel like it might not be clear!)

You guys. She wasn't even trying to be funny. I adore Khaos already I'm gonna have a fucking great time.

[aeoki]

Seven Bridges - The Dead Chatterbox: Chapter 1

Location: Yumenosaki Rooftop Characters: Hajime & Hitsugi Season: Summer Writer: Akira

TL Note:

In the original script, when Hitsugi switches from NEGI to himself, he uses a male personal pronoun (僕 / boku), however, we don’t have this in English, so I opted to replace it with the last line instead (“...careless boy I am.”). Do note this extra line does not appear in the original.

At this point in time, I do not have information about whether or not “Gatekeeper” is actually a blood relative of Hitsugi, so please note that “uncle” is the loosest sense of the word in English. (If you do have information on this, please don’t hesitate to let me know and I’ll change it!)

< May, the first year ES was established. The rooftop of the Yumenosaki Academy idol school building. >

Hajime: Hmhmm ♪ La la beats, love Ra*bits~...♪

(Ahh, it’s been so peaceful lately~ The sun is out and it’s so nice and warm~ The washing also smells lovely.)

(The school has been pretty quiet ever since ES was built~... It’s so quiet to the point you can even hear the birds chirping.)

(The strongest and most lively people graduated from Yumenosaki, after all. I do like the quiet but it does feel a bit lonely.)

(That’s why I end up humming unconsciously…)

Hmhmm ♪ La la beats…♪

???: SenpaisenPAISENPAI!

Hajime: Whaa!?

(Eh? Huh? What? Who? I didn’t hear any footsteps!)

(Whaa, how embarrassing! He didn’t hear me humming, did he…?)

???: Senpai SENPAI, where are you!? I don’t even know your name yet!

Um, I wanted to thank you, Senpa–

–Tonfa?

Hajime: Tonfa!?

???: Hagya!? Migyo!? Ogyuruppiria!? Gyango!?

Hajime: A-A-A-Are you okaaaay!?

???: …………

Hajime: Uuu, w-w-w-what should I do? That was a big trip but you’re not hurt, are you?

???: “I’m fine.”

“I’m a sturdy girl and I’ve also got luck on my side.”

“I’ll survive no matter what. That’s my fate.”

Hajime: (A-A girl? Hm? Their hair is long too.)

(But I don’t have the right to say anything, either.)

(But they’re wearing a boy’s uniform, right…? A-Are they like Narukami-senpai?)

(Wait, this isn’t the time to be thinking about this! Gosh, I’m still not great at handling unexpected situations…)

U-Umm!

???: …………

Hajime: Are you okay…? Err, I can carry you to the infirmary if you’d like?

???: …………

Hajime: Oh! I’m actually quite strong, although I might not look it…?

???: “Wait. I’ll switch right now.”

Hajime: (“Switch”...?)

???: I thought I was a goneeeeeerr!

Hajime: Hyaaaa!? P-P-P-Please don’t shout all of a sudden!

???: Huh? Ahh, I’m sorry! I don’t really know what’s going on but I’ll apologise! It’s usually my fault in these sorta situations~! What a careless boy I am![*]

Hajime: (B-Boy? Huh? Didn’t they say they were a girl just before?)

???: Hm? I think I’ve seen you somewhere before! You look so cute!

Hajime: Huh? Me? Um, I’m in a unit called “Ra*bits” in the idol cours–

???: Wha~!

Hajime: Wha~!?

???: I’m sorry! My head goes boom and bam when I have to listen to complicated stuff!

Hajime: B-Bam?

???: Yes! My head’s a little broken! Even as we speak, it’s getting more and more that and–

Hajime: What are you talking about…?

???: Wha~!

Hajime: Wha~!?

???: –That’s what it turns into! I’m in such a pickle!

Hajime: I-I see…? Umm, that must be tough…?

???: It’s fine because I’m used to it! My big sister will handle all the important stuff anyway!

Hajime: Big sister…? Umm, do you have a sister in the idol course?

???: Huh? How’d you come to that conclusion? I don’t really know!

Hajime: Huh? Um, that’s because this is the school building for the idol course…? Also, weren’t you searching for someone…?

???: Woah! I guess smart people can tell, huh!

That’s right~ There’s someone I wanna meet…♪

Hajime: D-Do you want to meet your big sister?

???: Nope, that’s not it! I can meet my sister anytime!

Well, I can’t meet her at all at the same time? Huh? I’m getting confused!

Where is this? Who am I…?

Hajime: ……? ……?

U-Umm? If you’re looking for somebody, shall I get someone to call for them over the school intercom?

Err, Nii-cha– I mean, a graduated upperclassman of mine used to be the chairman of the Broadcasting Committee and I’ve helped out a few times.

???: Stop! Don’t talk so much! I can’t understand since I’m stupid!

Hajime: Uuu, umm, I might be… able to find the person… you’re looking for over the school intercom.

???: Ohh, I see! Wow, that’s like magic! I don’t really know anything about magic! But my sister does!

She’s especially good at revolving the deat~!

Hajime: R-Revolving? What?

???: My bad! I meant reviving the dead…! Japanese is hard!

Hajime: Um, you’re not Japanese…?

???: I’m a Japanese person through and through! Both my sister and my dad are too! Too!

Hajime: I see~... Me too – we’re the same ♪

???: Yes! We’re the same so we’re friends!

Oh! I didn’t tell you my name even though we’re friends! I’m a second-year student in the producer course – my name is Hitsugi Kurone!

Hajime: Ohh. Umm, if you’re a second-year student then we’re in the same year. I’m a second-year student in the idol course, Hajime Shino~♪

Hitsugi: Oh! We may be in the same school year but I just enrolled into the school!

Other than the third-year person who saved me, umm, the one I don’t know the name of, we’re all “new students”! In the producer course, anyway!

Hajime: Umm. The only third-year student in the producer course is the only “producer” who enrolled into the school last year…

That’s Anzu Onee-chan, right?

Hitsugi: Huh? Nee-chan? Big sister? You’re the younger brother of that mighty Senpai, Shinohaji-kun!?

Hajime: No one has ever shortened my name like that before… Um, I’m not her real brother but we’re quite close.

Hitsugi: Ohh~! I’ve got a big sister too! We’re the same! Friends~☆

Hajime: Friends…♪ Umm, Kurone-san?

Hitsugi: Oh, call me “Hitsugi”! It confuses things with my sister!

Anyway, ahh~! Whaa~! I forgot what I was going to say!

I remember now! Shinohaji-kun, that Anzu-senpai person? If you know her, could you summon her with your phone or something?

Hajime: Ah, umm, Hitsugi-kun? Hitsugi-san? You were looking for Anzu Onee-chan?

Hitsugi: Yup yup! I wanna meet her!

Hajime: I see~ Hehe, Anzu Onee-chan’s always so popular.

But did you have some sort of business with her?

Hitsugi: I was thinking about how I wanted to grant her wish!

Hajime: Okay…?

Hitsugi: She saved me so I want to grant her wish!

Shinohaji-kun, which do you think she’ll like better? Killing someone or bringing someone back to life?

Hajime: ………?

Hitsugi: My sister’s a “necromancer” so she’s really good at that kinda stuff!

Uncle[∗] “Gatekeeper” even praised her once! Ehe ☆

Hajime: ……? ……? ……?

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤNext Chapter →