#(also sorry the english is a bit off it is past 1am here and i should be in bed lol)
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Hi, I've been a fan of J2 for some time now but I've never come across the tin hat fandom (do I call it correctly?) before (i always adored their interactions but never actually considered that they could have an actual romantic relationship that's not just in my mind haha) and I'm intrigued now. Could you please point me in the direction of some masterposts about them? Would love to read more about it! & also about their wives and kids bc I don't quite understand how it would be possible for them to maintain a beard-marriage for so long and also to have kids (??)
Sorry if this was really messy but it's 1am and English is my 2nd language so I'm not exactly capable of forming grammatically correct sentences🙈
Hi, there! 😊❤️
And welcome!
You’re about to start a wild ride into the heart of this decade point five romance between Jared and Jensen that will absolutely have you supergluing your tinhat onto your head just like the rest of us (as is always the case when anyone decides to really delve deeply enough into what’s been going on between the Js ever since their paths merged so many years ago).
A great starting place is going to be Speak the Truth, the site I’ve linked above, which pretty extensively covers 2005-2013, although there’s a lot of reading involved in that, so for some more condensed summaries, I’ll include links to a few of my past posts outlining a lot of my own observations on key elements of the Js’ relationship.
But first, I’ve also added timelines for a couple of additional years (2016 and 2017) on my page:
I’ll be adding 2018 fairly soon, and 2019-2023 (plus 2014 and 2015, very important years) will all be here as well as soon as I can finish them.
Here’s a post where I go over quite a bit of my own tinhat journey:
And here’s another summary-type post with some good examples to look into:
I could probably turn this post into a nightmare of far too many links lol, so I’ll cut myself off here, but I’m so glad that you reached out, and I’m ALWAYS happy to chat (in excruciating detail 😜) about anything you may wonder about or want to clarify or have questions about…anything at all.
So message me whenever you like, or send asks, either way.
And I wish you all the best, my friend!
———
Edit: here’s one last link focusing more heavily on the kids/parenting stuff!
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hiii! i love your work and I really admire the way you write 💕💖, so I couldn't resist making a request hehe. if it's not too much of a hassle, i'd like 11 or 22 for Illumi, please. thank you very much in advance, i send you a lot of love from Madrid uwuwu 💗💕💞😘 (and sorry for my bad English 😓😭)
your english is wonderful >:( also MADRID!!! I wanna go to Madrid...
[Prompt #22 "Stop Being Seductive!" "I Was Being Myself, But Okay"] [Fluff and a bit of Crack because I couldnt help it]
A Date?
You stood on the outskirts of a private estate, ¾ of the view of the mansion obscured by a hedge of lush green arborvitae rising above a brick wall about twice your height. Not that you would have been able to see much if the obstructions weren’t there, it was the dead of night and the mansion only provided faint specks of light in the distance, with the scattered decorative lamp posts offering faint halos of light every few feet, but still managing to leave you shrouded in darkness.
Frankly, you had no reason to be there; in the mansion, near it, or outside of it. You had been asked to accompany Illumi on a job, and although this had slowly become a frequent occurrence, it always puzzled you every time. The first time he’d asked you, he had essentially appeared in your living room and asked you to come with him “somewhere” and upon asking him to clarify, he followed with again asking you to come with him, this time saying to join him on a job. You had been ready to participate, but he ended up leaving you standing around nowhere near the actual action, and would then return to you after 30 minutes and would bring you home. Now, this had been about the tenth time he’d asked you to join him on a job, knowing very well he’d have you standing around waiting for him. This was only made stranger by the fact that not only did he have someone that he did jobs with (a questionable jester), but you had actually actively participated in jobs with Illumi, so why Illumi had changed your position from job partner to benching you. In his defense, you had failed to ask him why he had been doing this lately, rather, you had been attempting for the last 3 or so meetings to figure it out yourself. There were no logical reasons as to why he dragged you to his missions but his ‘work partner’, as Illumi so endearingly referred to, had once run into you while you were waiting on the sidelines for Illumi and given you a strange bit of insight in passing.
He had questioned why Illumi had you waiting out there all by your lonesome, knowing how much Illumi cared for you. Cared for you? That was an interesting bit of news… Illumi had never made it apparent that he so much as a thought of you other than a work associate, let alone that he ‘cared’ for you beyond that. As this jester had left you standing in the dark, a final passing comment of “what a strange way to bond with someone you fancy” caught you off guard.
A way to bond?
Someone you fancy?
Granted this was Illumi Zoldyck you were talking about, and he was dense like fruitcake in terms of making bonds and connections other than things pertaining strictly to work, but the thought of him fancying you and trying to bond with you made your gears turn.
On your end, you’d done a surprisingly good job at keeping your own feelings towards Illumi at bay, weary about how he would react to the prospect of someone fancying him. You couldn’t really lie to yourself when you thought about him. One would definitely call him strange, which was an understatement in most circumstances, but something about his strangeness and lack of awareness for social cues was oddly endearing. Little quirks about how he liked his tea or the occasional indulgence he took part in, or his particular hair care routine always managed to captivate you. Along with his (albeit something he was at a default) honesty and genuine answers, and his offhand compliments, you struggled to keep yourself together at his awkwardness. Not to mention, he was simply physically stunning, while some would call him rather plain. It might be his plainness that intrigued you, but it wasn’t like it’d be wrong to think so. Even if you felt this way about him, he had no way of knowing, and you had no inclination that it was reciprocated. He’d never made it known about having feelings for you, so you wondered if the two of you were playing an evenly matched waiting game with each other at this juncture.
Why would he feel the same anyway? It’s not like you were eccentric like that questionable jester Illumi was friends with, or that you came from an affluent family of assassins… you provided no value to Illumi other than… company.
“Let's go.”
You shifted your eyes around, noticing Illumi standing beside you, his eyes burning into yours. How long had he been standing there…?
You nodded, picking yourself up off the wall, and began walking back the way you two had come, only for Illumi to stand in front of you and stop you.
“This way.” he pointed behind you and you turned, looking at hazy streetlamps down the way.
“But home is” you pointed past him in the opposite direction, “this way.”
“I am bringing you somewhere. This way.” he turned you around and began walking further away from home with you in tow.
“Where are we goin’ Illu?” you asked, wondering what was past the dark street if anything at all.
“The park,” he answered, still walking, his eyes straight ahead.
Wasn’t it around 1am? What could be at the park at this hour?
Upon arriving at the park, the park was equally as dark as the street by the mansion, and since the scarce lights in the park were so dim, it only served to make the park feel barren, especially with only you and Illumi here.
He’d stopped by a bench situated in front of a small pond, the water gently breaking the silence whilst reflecting soft moonlight, and you couldn’t help but get lost in your thoughts while staring at the dark pond until Illumi called your name.
You didn’t answer, you only let your distant gaze fall on him, taking him in one aspect at a time. Everything, everything was perfect about him, regardless if that was what he was ‘created’ to be or if your thoughts about him made you feel like he was perfect. What had his friend been thinking, “someone you fancy”? Compared to Illumi you were nowhere near perfection, you still had so much work to do on yourself and perfecting your trade, yet the hint that Illumi felt something towards you felt absolutely absurd when you realized what you were up against. Apart from living up to his family's expectations, would you be able to live up to his? Highly unlikely, at least to you.
There you stood, brooding at Illumi who was merely standing there looking stunning, although there was rarely a time he didn’t.
“Y/n.”
Nothing out of you yet again, still brooding.
“Y/n.”
Again, calling out to you like you’d left the scene as he stared at you as you stared at him.
“Y/n you are staring.”
You scowled, finally looking away, huffing as you did so.
“You’re being….seductive. Stop being seductive!” you muttered, attempting to inspect the tops of your shoes.
You glanced at him and he blinked, big eyes holding a sense of genuine confusion as he slowly answered.
“I was not.”
“Yes, you are!”
“I was being myself, but okay y/n.”
You sighed, giving him a glare as you sat down on the bench, feeling somewhat defeated and wholly embarrassed for attempting to call him out… on seductiveness.
“Why’d you bring me here anyways?” you asked, kicking at the rocks on the ground.
“A date.”
You turned your head fast enough you felt the strain in your neck from doing so. Eyes wide and full of confusion, you attempted to string a coherent sentence together all while giving him a bewildered look.
“Date? Now?”
“Yes. This is a date.”
You cocked your head to the side and squinted at him.
As smart as he is, he seems to be as thick as mince when it comes to dates…
“Illumi this isn’t… a date.”
“Yes, it is.”
“We’re sitting in a park, Illu. In the middle of the night.”
“Did you prefer the previous occurrences as dates?”
“What previous occurrences…” you whispered, wondering how he could become vaguer and vaguer with his view of dates.
“My missions.”
“Those were dates?!” you slumped down in your spot, rubbing your face with your hands.
“Were you not aware.”
“Those aren’t dates! You never even asked me on a date!”
“I asked you to come with me.”
“That's asking to tag along! Not a date!”
He was silent for a moment, looking at you with a classically vacant look before speaking up.
“I will take you on a date.”
“That’s a nice sentiment, Lumi, but when? And why?”
“Tomorrow. I like you.”
Slack-jawed but somewhat satisfied (courtesy of his honesty, no matter how jarring) you nodded slowly, wondering if that jester wasn’t so wrong after all.
“Okay.”
“Good.”
He took a seat by you, watching the water as well. You never could tell what he was thinking, and more often than not you’d rather not find out, but whatever those thoughts were now… he seemed calmer, almost or at least at ease. Whether that was due to your acceptance of a (proper) date or not was something you’d maybe find out later, but that was of little concern right now.
The main concern would be finding a last-minute date outfit… and hoping it wasn’t the park during the day.
#anime#anime drabbles#anime fluff#anime crack#hunter x hunter#hunter x hunter fluff#hunter x hunter drabbles#hunter x hunter crack#illumi zoldyck#illumi#illumi fluff#illumi crack#illumi drabbles#gender neutral s/o#gender neutral y/n#x reader#gender neutral reader#illumi x reader#mentions of Hisoka#through careful and deep discussion#theres been a discovery that Illumi is a chad#he couldve been a Himbo if he respected people#anyway#Chad Illumi Supremacy
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7, 10, 34, 47, 55 from the 65 questions :)
7. what shirt are you wearing?
- a black cropped tank top i got from Torrid and a Black sweatshirt i got from Hot Topic that has Sam from Supernatural on it and on the back it says Moose 😅 (it’s one of my favorite sweatshirts 🥰🖤)
10. what were you doing at midnight last night?
- i was laying in my bed. my depression was (and still kinda is, tbh) pretty bad and i didn’t feel like watching anything, so i just laid in bed, was letting myself feel how i need to and just let myself be. idk how else to describe it lol. i just was there 😅 and then my younger cousin came in my room (she stayed the night for the past few nights lol) and she was gonna get ready to go to bed and then she was being all goofy and singing some weird song she made up and that made me think of something, which lead us to bringing up random little (i guess) inside jokes we’ve made over the past 2 days and from last week and we got in one of those laughing fits for like almost 10 minutes 😅 like where we just ended up laughing at each other laughs and it somehow made it even funnier even though all of it was really stupid lol.
47. if you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?
- are you living the way you’ve always wanted to and dreamed of?
(going on adventures, traveling with friends and a significant other. doing what my heart desires. living life to the fullest and doing what makes me truly happy)
55. can you do any accents other than your own?
- umm… i can kind of do a british accent. like not a super cheesy or the typical one people do to make themselves sound fancy lol. i love doctor who and have watched so many other english shows so when i’m alone i will talk to myself or my cat in those accents lol. oh or one time one of my best friends and i talked in british accents the whole day and later that night (like maybe 1am lol) we went out to eat with my brother and we were still talking like that (it was hard to stop and we were having too much fun lol) and when we got to the restaurant, my brother told us that if he didn’t stop with the accent, he was gonna get in his car and leave us there 😂 it was so funny. we didn’t mean to annoy him lol but it was an added bonus lmao. and then when we got in the restaurant we slipped in and out of it and it kept making my brother so mad 😂 we weren’t doing it on purpose 😅 we just couldn’t help it.
and i can kind of do an italian accent. both my grandparents on my mom’s side are from (born and raised) italy. so they have kinda strong accents and when we make fun of my papa (my grandpa. it’s okay, he’s an ass and deserves to be made fun of) we all talk like him and do his accent 😅
and i can barely do an irish, australian or russian accent. i just try them after watching certain things and i’m not really good at them lol. if anyone wants to hear me do any of the accents i mentioned, let me know and i will absolutely make a fool of myself to entertain anyone who wants it lol.
34 is answered under here ⬇️ my answer for the next one is super long (i am so so so sorry, i didn’t mean for it to and just thought i would do this so that no one had to try and scroll past it if they didn’t want to read it. i hope that makes sense lol)
34. what was your last dream about?
- so i don’t remember my dreams from last night, but i do remember the ones from the night before 😅 so i was at some hockey game (no idea why, not really a fan of hockey at all lmao) and so in the dream not only was Robert Sheehan there, but there were some characters from a movie i used to love as a kid (a live action movie. not a cartoon lol) and the characters from that movie were flirting with me and at some point randomly one of them told me they made a bet with someone that i wouldn’t give them a kiss (i have no idea why… lmao) so i ended up giving them both a kiss each and then nothing ended up coming from that lol.
and then there was this really cute girl in my dream who was flirting with me on and off through out the whole dream and at one point she was leaving this restaurant i went to after the hockey game (she was at the game as well and then happened to be at the same restaurant afterward lol) and gave me her number, told me to call her sometime and then she kissed me and it was really cute lol.
and then not long after that, Rob came to that restaurant and i guess in my dream, he was one of my best friends and so we sat down at a table and after we ordered food and while we were eating, we were talking and catching up. and okay one point he was asking me how my day was and what i’d been up to and so i filled him in on all of it and i could see he was getting a bit bothered by it. so i asked him if he was alright and he ended up saying to me, he wanted to tell me something that’s been on his mind for a while now but didn’t know how to say it and didn’t want to make me uncomfortable.
i remember getting really nervous cause i didn’t know where he was going with this and was pretty sure i made him upset and i didn’t know why or what i might’ve done. (my anxiety likes to make me feel like i’ve done something wrong at any chance it gets 🙃) so i asked him if i did something wrong and he reassured me that i didn’t but he didn’t wanna talk about it in here. so we end up going to his place (apparently in my dream he was renting a house to stay in while he was in the US cause we were definitely no at his place in London lol. it didn’t look like it at all 😅)
and so we get settled in his place and sat down and he took me hands and apologized for not wanting to talk about this in the restaurant, for making me wait to talk about it and he understands i must be feeling pretty anxious because he didn’t give me any indication as to what he wanted to talk about. and then he also apologized for not saying this sooner. so i reassured him it was alright and that i understand him wanting to talk about whatever it is at his place and asked him again if everything is alright. so as we’re sitting on his couch, i’m sitting on it facing him but like with my legs crossed up on the couch (idk how else to describe it lol)
he scooted in closer to me and told me that he had a hard time hearing me talk about flirting with other people and saying that i kissed them. he told me it hurt him even though he tried so hard to not let it get to him or bother him but he couldn’t help it. (i honestly didn’t expect things to go in this direction lol)
so i nodded and apologized that it hurt him. i told him i truly didn’t mean to and didn’t know that was something that would’ve bothered him. i told him that i don’t ever want to hurt him and i’m so sorry that i did. he smiled sweetly at me and put his left hand on my right cheek and kinda on my neck and jawline, and told me that it was okay and i didn’t need to apologize. he said that’s not why he told me that. he didn’t mean to make me feel bad. he just wanted to be honest with me. and as he said it, he gently rubbed his thumb on my cheekbone, and said speaking of being honest, he told me that for so long he had a crush on me. he really likes me and wish he had said something sooner.
he told me he hadn’t because he couldn’t tell if i was just being nice to him or if i was flirting with him and he said honestly that he didn’t expect to have feelings for me or fall for me.
he said when he met me for the first time, he could tell we were gonna become really good friends but he honestly didn’t expect to fall for me. he said he realized how shallow this was going to sound but i’m not normally the type of person physically that he’s attracted to. (i mean, i highly doubt he would be attracted to me seeing as how i’m 5’1 and plus size lol) so he apologized for how rude that came off and i reassured him that i completely understood and wasn’t offended.
i could see he was starting to kinda beat himself up because this wasn’t going how he wanted it to and it broke my heart 🥺 i ended up putting my hands on his cheeks, pulled his face in close to mine and told him that it’s okay. i understand what he’s trying to say and i appreciate him being so honest. he gave me a little smile but still looked somewhat upset with himself. he kinda sighed and thanked me for understanding. he gave me these sweet little puppy dog eyes and said “i just- i just love you and am so in love with you and i don’t want to lose you”.
so extremely touched by what he said i blushed and gave him a smile, looked into his gorgeous green eyes and told him that i feel the exact same way about him. i said that i’ve felt that way since before we met but didn’t want to say anything because i honestly didn’t think he did or would ever feel that way about me. (and i didn’t wanna come off weird and only have him see me as a fan and then not wanna be my friend lol) but i told him that i’m so unbelievably happy that he does and i’m so in love with him, too. he gave me the cutest smile. then i pulled he face closer to mine and we kissed 🥰 after we did, he smiled and said “you have no idea how long i’ve wanted to do that” and i told him, me too. so then he kissed me again and things progressed pretty quickly to where we ended up making out for a bit 😅 and then after that, he asked me if he could be my boyfriend 🥺 and i said i would absolutely love that 💙 and he gave me a little kiss on the nose and then i snuggled up into his side and we watched something and then i woke up 😅 - sorry i didn’t mean to ramble so much and go into so much detail lol. it just really stuck in my mind and wanted to share as much as i remembered 😅 i know it’s pretty cheesy lol.
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Prince Charming is Not my Type
Chapter One- Sweetheart
Tuesday- January 2, 20XX.
Nova Hazel Marquez
I stood by my locker, taking out my math book, with my two best friends at my side. Marley, the school hipi, to my left and Luca, the school's star quarterback, to my right. We are a 'strange bunch' as everyone says. Me, Nova Hazel Marquez, being the school tomboy. The halls were packed and loud, as it always is every morning. Filled with teens bickering about parties, boy drama, and Prom that's coming up. Conversations floating around about who's going to be there and with whom. The main people on everyone's lips, the three musketeers, as they call themselves... I roll my eyes thinking about Emma, the school mean girl, cheerleader and how she could try and steal the heart of one of our school's musketeers. As she tries to do every year before Prom.
Think of the devils and they may come, the hall grew silent as the schools three bad boys entered the hallway. All students moved to make them a path through the crowded hall. I turned back to my locker; the three musketeers walked down the hall behind me, musketeer number three being Parker Davis. Tall broad shoulder brunette with the lightest blue eyes you could imagine. Number two being Coal Micheals, slim but buff, smiling blondy with brown eyes. Probably the worlds biggest player. And of course number one, mister heart-throb of the school Logan MacKellin. Tan, tall, muscular, black wavy haired, hazel golden eyed hunk who believe it or not doesn't date! All of them wearing their signature black ripped jeans, white t-shirt, and black leather jacket. Classic bad boy look.
A gasp came from Marley and I turned to see what shocked her, even though I didn't care nor want to know. What I saw even shocked me. There, in front of the three bad boys, stood a tall dark red haired girl who held a schedule in her hands. Must be new here. By the look on the bad boys' faces, you could tell she wasn't having a pleasant conversation with the three. Coal looked pissed, Logan looked amused and Parker looked shy, strange, that's not like him. You see, Parker and I used to be close, he was once a part of the "strange bunch," then he started to hang with his other friends, the musketeers, more than us, so naturally, I know him pretty well.
At this point, Coal was as red as a tomato and speechless. Logan was holding his knees laughing and trying to catch his breath. And Mr. Shy was looking anywhere, but at the new girl walking away, with a slight blush on his face. All I heard from their conversation was something about "ducklings," strange, why would that piss Mr. Bad Boy off so much, crack the other up and make the last blush?
I shook my head as they began to walk. Saying bye to Luca and Marley, I grabbed my bag and started to head to class. With me being my stupid, clumbsy self, I bumped into someone. OHHHHH!!! That's a muscular stomach and chest! I thought. Without looking up I mumbled sorry and started to walk again, but was stopped dead in my tracks because of two things. One was Coal, he sounded irritated, with a huff he said "Everyones getting in our way today, aren't they?" Damn that sounded bitter. And two, there was a hand around my wrist, stopping me from walking further.
I looked up and saw Logan, the owner of the hand along with the muscular chest and stomach. I frowned and furrowed my eyebrows at him.
"Yes?" I questioned "Can I walk without you grabbing me?"
"Sorry Nova, you were going to run into Parker if I didn't stop you," he said back.
WOW! WOW! WHAT?
He knows my name? How?
What the fuck? We've like, never talked, ever!
Wow, Mr. Heart throb knows my name.
"Awe, sweetheart, don't look so confused and worried. I just don't want you bumping into anyone else, try not to watch your feet so much," he smirked at me.
I looked dumbly at him.
Sweetheart? What?
"Head to class, Nova, you're going to be late," he said with a bright smile.
"Uh, yeah, thanks Logan," it came out as more of a question than an answer.
"No problem, love," he said.
And with that I headed to bio. Parker trailing behind me, him as well, looking confused. Parker catches up to me,"Sweetheart? Love?," he questioned. "You know, I didn't even know he knew my name, and what's up with the pet names?" I asked him. He shrugged, "I'm not sure, I've never heard him use pet names with anyone." Weird. Oh well.
"So... Mr.Shy, you like the new girl," I asked.
He just blushed and shook his head. I chuckle at his childishness and then we walk into Bio. We both sat at the same lab table, but with a space in between us.
"So, how did Logan learn my name?" I asked him.
"I'm not sure, but you do know that we have gone to school with him since primary school, right?" he said.
"We have!?" I questioned, "how did I not notice him tell high school?"
He laughed and shrugged again, "I don't know, Via, you're not the most observant," he said.
"HEY!," I growled then smacked his arm. He just laughed and got his notebook out.
"It is kind of strange though," he said.
"What?," I asked.
"That he knows your name," he answered.
"How?," I mumbled confused.
"Well, you see he doesn't learn the names of the girls in this town, or at all, actually," he said.
"Why not?" okay, now I'm really confused.
But before I could get an answer, Parker looked towards the door and blushed, completely going silent. When I looked I saw the new girl walking in. Yeah he definitely likes her. The new girl looks around searching for a seat. Goody the only open one is next to Parker! The new girl noticed and headed our way, she sits and turns towards me and in a thick scottish accent ,"Hello, my name is Ricolette Amethyst MacCormack. And you are?" "Do we really have to do the middle name thing?" I asked. ̈"That's a bit too formal for me." She chuckles, "heh, nice. I already like you. So, what's your name?" she asked. "Not into the formal stuff are you," I chuckled, "by the way, I'm Nova Marquez." Ricolette went on to explain why she doesn't like things that are formal, but quited down as the teacher walked in. I noticed Parker not writing and bouncing his leg anxiously. Nervous that the new girl sat next to you,are we? It's okay little Parky, I doubt Ricy will bite. Oh I'm calling her that from now on.
~~~~~
"What's wrong Parky, forgot how to write?" I teased with a big smirk on my face.
Next to me, Ricy began to laugh, quite loudly and then apologized for interrupting class.
"Yeah, we're definitely going to be good friends," she whispered to me. I smiled at that. I really hope, there's no one else at this school other than her and I that is willing to stand up to the Musketeers, so I hope we end up being good friends. It would be fun to torture the bad boys with her.
Before I knew it, we had finished our class work and class had come to an end. I guess it's off to english for me.
.....
Second period seemed to end before it began. And then I had to head to Spanish class. As I walked I had a weird feeling that everyone was watching me, but also like someone was following me.
Oh well.
"Hola Nova," my spanish teacher greeted me as I walked to the door.
"Hola Logan," she said looking past me.
My neck snapped to look behind me, and sure enough Mr. Heartthrob was right behind me, just looking at me.
Since when did Mr. Heartthrob have spanish with me? I thought, deciding it would be fine to say it out loud.
"Since when did you have spanish with me?" obviously not calling him Mr. Heartthrob, don't want to boost his ego, now do we?
"Awe, you break my heart, Nova. We have been in the same spanish classes since freshman year and you're just now noticing me? I'm hurt," he said mocking fake pain, with a hand on his beautiful, muscular chest.
Wow, beautiful, muscular chest? What? I think I need to stop staying up till 1am reading, I think I'm going delusional.
"Oh whatever Mr. Ego," I said to him, walking into the class.
"Awe, now you're walking away from me, you pain me, sweetheart," he said with and obvious smirk playing in his voice.
Again with the pet names? Parker said he doesn't use pet names! Let alone, learn a girl's name.
"What's up with all the pet names, Mr. Bad boy?" I questioned.
"Tsk, tsk, love, don't question me, it might end up bad. And if anything, I should be asking what your infatuation is with calling me Mr. Blank. You got a naughty kink I should know about, pumpkin?" he smirked.
THIS PRICK!!! What the fuck?! Wait, Pumpkin? Another one?
"UGH!!! Fuck you, prick!" I said irritated.
"Anytime, darling," he smirked.
Does he always smirk so much? Is that just his face? God he's irritating, oh but so hot!!! Yeah I definitely need sleep.
I growl in frustration and walk further into the class, past him, taking a random seat in the back of the class, just ready for this class to be over already. To my despise, he walked in and took the seat next to me.
How fucking lovely!!! Note my sarcasm.
I turned to him smirking," Obsessed with me, are you?" I teased.
Might as well piss him off so he stops talking to me.
"Always, pumpkin," he smirks.
Oh he so didn't.
"Isn't there someone else you can go and bug? And not me?" I asked, clearly getting annoyed.
"Sorry, sweetheart, but class has already started, plus I have to get you back for running into me this morning, don't you think it's only fair?" he teased.
"Oh that's so not fair, I didn't see you, I was looking down," I grumbled.
"Yeah, but you still ran into me, love. You really need to stop watching your feet, so much, when you walk," he smiled.
Wow! His smile is mesmerizing! Okay, Nova, stop swooning!
"And what do you suppose I look at instead?" I questioned.
"Well Nova, you could always look at me," he smirked again.
This cocky prick!
"And why would I want to do that?" I said, trying not to chuckle at the look on his face, sadly the surprise was gone quicker than it showed up.
"Because I'm undeniably sexy," he smirked.
"I beg to differ, I'd rather look at Parker," I smirked, knowing I was getting to him. His face flashed with an emotion I couldn't recognize, but it left, again quicker then it showed up.
Strange...
"You pain me, princess," he chuckled.
God, he's just adding to the list of pet names!!!
" I do that a lot, don't I?" I asked.
"Yeah, especially since..." he couldn't finish his sentence because our spanish teacher shushed us and began to speak.
Since what?! What was he going to say! Oh lord help me.
"Hola clase," she said enthusiastically.
"Hola senora Mason," the class mumbled. And of course, I stopped listening after that.
What was he going to say? What the hell? Have I changed? Wait he didn't even know me before today. God I'm confused.
When senora Mason asked what the date was, in spanish I heard Logan grown next to me.
Don't like spanish, do we Mr. Heartthrob?
I bumped Logan. "Don't really like spanish?" I asked and the class answers senora Mason, saying "Es la dos de enero."
"It's not that I don't like it, it's just that it's annoying to learn things you already know," he whispered to me.
"Already know?"
"Yeah, I'm fluent in spanish, took this class for credit," he chuckles.
WHAT THE HELL?! Mr. Heartthrob is hot and smart?! Score!!! Okay, stop that, Nova, stop right now.
"Awe, sweetheart, you're looking confused again," he chuckled.
"Who knew Mr. Heartthrob was smart?" I mumbled under my breath hoping he wouldn't hear.
"Not many people, love," he smirked.
Ahhhhh shit!!!
"Don't tell people I'm smart, and I wont tell people that you called me Mr. Heartthrob," he chuckled.
THIS PRICK!!!
"Ugh, you're irritating!" I growled.
"Deal or no deal?" he asked, sticking his hand out for me to shake.
"Ugh, deal!," I grumbled, taking his hand.
We shook, but he didn't let go of my hand yet. Instead, he looked down at it, looking straight at my thin silver ring with a slight greenish blue design, made to look like leaves.
He began to twirl it around my finger. It always was on my right ring finger. My mother gave it to me for my 15th birthday. Two days before I got in "the accident."
Under the ring sat a scar. It was less than 5cm, but just big enough to notice.
He stopped playing with my ring, looking at the scar that hide under it's thin band.
"Where'd you get that?" he questioned, looking up, staring straight into my eyes.
Oh god, his eyes are beautiful, they are a lovely golden, green. They always shine so bright.
"The ring or the scar?" I asked quietly.
"Both," he smiled, a real smile, not a smirk, but a smile.
"The ring from my mom when I turned 15 and the scar is from an accident two days after," I smiled back.
He hummed in understanding. Playing with my ring a little more, but dropped my hand when we had the worksheet handed to us.
What the hell was that about?
We were both silent the rest of the period, just working on the class work. The bell rang a few minutes after I had finished my work. I got up and began to pack up my stuff.
"So, where are we going?" Logan asked.
"What do you mean?" I questioned.
"Where are we going, sweetheart? I'm going to walk you to your next class," he chuckled.
"Oh, I have a free period next," I laughed.
"Good, I don't want to be lonely. I got free too, where should we go, love?" he smiled, that breathtaking smile.
"You want to hang out with me?" I said confused.
"Of course I do, Via," he said flirtatiously.
Strange, only Parker calls me that.
"Hmmm, I guess we could go get food or something. I'm starving, I didn't eat breakfast today," I chuckled.
"Food it is!!!" he exclaimed happily, grabbing my hand and dragging me to the parking lot towards a beautiful dark blue, 1975 stepside chevy.
I was too busy gawking at his truck to realize he'd got in.
"Are you coming, sweetheart, or are you just going to keep drooling over my beautiful truck?" he smirked.
I glared at him and got in the passenger's seat.
"You like Baby?" he asked.
"I'm guessing Baby is your truck, so yes," I smiled.
He chuckled and started the truck.
We didn't drive too far, just down the street to Mary's Drive and Dine. It's a popular place for us high school students to hang out at during lunch, free periods and after school. We also have after parties here after football games.
I honestly, rarely go here. I just don't enjoy how crowded it gets. It makes me uncomfortable, but because it was during the free period, the diner was pretty much empty.
I smiled when I realized it wasn't crowded.
Thank gosh!
"Smiling causes you to be happy to be alone with me?" Logan smirked.
"Technically, we're not alone, there's the cooks, the cashier, the waitresses and that couple in the back," I smirked back.
"Is that so, sweetheart? We can always go back to my place to be alone," he said, more serious than I was comfortable with.
"I'm going to regret going with you, aren't I?" I mumbled under my breath and shook my head, causing him to chuckle.
More on Wattpad. Prince Charming is not my Type- adn_kay
All rights reserved for the story ideas, characters, plot, and any written parts
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there’s a reason {a.kempe}
A/N: finally, something new eh? this is longer than i originally intended but i had an idea so i just rolled with it where ever it took me. also i used google translate for the swedish so if it doesn’t translate correctly i apologize :/
requested: yes / no
word count: 2.4k
title song: there’s a reason by wet
warnings: none
“Remind me again why you decided to drag me out this early, and why you have me bringing clothes?” you sighed as you walked up to meet Adrian outside your apartment building.
“We’re doing some bonding, come on Alex and Marty are already in the car.”
“I’m sorry what?”
“Just trust me, you’re gonna have fun.” He said, grabbing your hand and guiding you toward Alex’s car. Alex was in the passenger seat and Alec in the drivers. It was a weird friend group in all honesty, but they were the ones that Adrian had introduced you to when you first moved to LA.
You climbed in the back seat with Adrian as the other two said a quick hello to you. The time for conversation was short lived as Alec hit play on his phone and you turned onto the road, taking you who knows where. It would sound sketchy if it weren’t for the fact that off the ice all three of the men you were with were huge softies. In all honesty you trusted them more than most other people in the world.
A song you didn’t know continued to play over the speakers in the car as you watched out the window, trying to get an idea for what the others had planned. You were heading away from the city and going towards more urban areas. Adrian didn’t seem to be paying attention as he obnoxiously sang with Alex. You watched him with a small smile as he nodded his head in time with the song, his hair flopping all over the place. He noticed you watching and directed his singing towards you, taking your hands and moving them along to the beat. You rolled your eyes and started dancing along with him as well.
As the song ended Adrian dropped your hands and grabbed Alec’s phone to queue some more songs. From what you saw they would be mostly in swedish and you would only understand a little, as would Alex and Alec. The first notes of the next song started and Adrian leaned back into the seat and just seemed to be enjoying the music that only made sense to him in the moment. The LA sun was beating through the window and onto him, small strands of hair covering parts of his face as he mouthed the words to whatever was playing.
Oh no.
You quickly turned away, facing the window again. You couldn’t be thinking this way now. He was one of your best friends, you couldn’t be catching feelings right? It was perfectly understandable to think he was good looking, since after all he was. You’ve had this suspicion for a while that you might have wanted something more but you had just kept pushing it off. It wasn’t something that could ever happen, you didn’t want to risk ruining your closest friendship. Deciding this time would be no different, you ignored your gut and willed the thought away.
Being completely lost in your thoughts for a moment, you totally missed the conversation that had been happening.
“Kan du vara mer uppenbar?” Alec said from the front seat with an eye roll. You hadn’t even began to process that somehow Alec knew swedish before Adrian shot back a reply.
“Vem sa att jag skulle bli subtil! hon vet när tiden är rätt.” The true swede said as he grabbed the phone once more, switching back to english music.
“Did I miss something here? Alec since when can you speak swedish.” You questioned, sitting up a little straighter.
“Dunno, picked some up from the other guys over time I guess. Shouldn’t you be asking where we’re going instead?” It was a clear effort to change the topic but you really did want to know where you were headed.
“Fine, where are we going?” You had been driving awhile and honestly had no clue where you were.
“I’m glad you asked, we’re going camping!”
“Alec are you serious? This has to have been Alex’s idea…”
“Hey!” Alex butted in quickly.
“I’m serious. We have a cabin by the lake so we figured it would be fun to go hang out there for a bit. Some of the other guys and their girlfriends are coming tomorrow too, so you won’t just be stuck with us all weekend.” Alec said, disregarding Alex’s comment.
“Alright that does sound kinda fun, how much longer till we’re there?”
“25 minutes or so, not too much longer.” He said, flipping through some more music.
You turned your attention back to Adrian, who had a slight smirk on his face as he watched you try and figure out how you agreed to spend the weekend with these fools. “You could have at least told me that was the plan” you said with a smack on his arm, “I would have brought cuter clothes for the occasion.”
He laughed as you fell back into the seat once more, leaning against him and decided on scrolling through your phone for the remainder of the drive. It wasn’t an unusual behavior for you two to be touchy, so when he wrapped his arm around you and rested his head on yours it didn’t phase you like you expected. You forced your earlier thoughts to the back of your mind once more, knowing it was just what you wished it could be.
Alex turned slightly, catching a glimpse of the two of you and giving you a look as if he knew something you didn’t. You gave him a confused glare as he shrugged and turned back to his conversation with Alec.
A short time later, the car stopped and you sat up to see where you were. There was a large cabin with a patio and a view of a nearby lake, surrounded by trees. It looked like beyond the patio there was a pool and a balcony coming off of the top floor. The sight of it alone made any doubts you had of this weekend go away as you took in the scenery around you. It was beautiful and you shared a smile with Adrian as he took your hand to exit the car.
“Alec this is stunning! How’d you find this place?”
“I didn’t, he did.” Alex said as he pointed toward Adrian, who was standing next to you with an even goofier smile than he had be giving before. He gave a small shrug as he grabbed some of the bags they had brought and headed towards the front door. Going to grab your own, you realized he already had it with him and you followed him up to the door.
The inside of the cabin was equally as amazing. There was a large kitchen and sitting area with a door leading out to the patio, a large window facing the lake, and a second floor that included all the bedrooms and another smaller sitting area in the center. You wandered up to the second floor, trying to decide on the room that you would pick for the night. Adrian trailed behind you with your bag.
“Which one do you want? I’ll let you have first pick before the other two bitch about it.” Adrian said as he held up your stuff.
The room by the back with cute nature decorations caught your eye, “that one.”
He went in and set your stuff down and walked back out, stopping to stand in front of you. Something was up, you didn’t realize it until now but something was definitely up with him. Before you had the chance to ask anything, Alex came in to ask Adrian to help with the rest of the stuff. They had been more prepared for this little weekend trip than you realized, which was surprising since they usually never had a plan.
Something was definitely up.
Adrian went back downstairs as you leaned over the railing of the second floor to watch the boys move everything out of the trunk of the car and into the cabin. You decided to go and see what else the cabin had to offer and noticed a fireplace downstairs, a grill on the patio, and a gaming counsel set up by the TV that the others most definitely had set up themselves. They were done moving everything in by now so you joined them in the kitchen, taking a seat next to Adrian who was sitting at the island in the middle. From what you could tell, they were talking about the plans for the night and who else would be coming the following day.
Eventually you all decided to make some food first and then go from there. Alex went out to the patio to use the grill and Alec was attempting to make something else at the kitchen counter. You wanted to go for a walk since the surrounding area was so gorgeous, but you didn’t want to go alone.
“Adrian, wanna come with me?” You questioned as he looked up from his phone and gave a quick nod and walking over to you. The two of of you left to go towards the nearest hiking trail that you had spotted when you first arrived. Looping your arm through Adrian’s, you two walked side by side, making idle conversation as you walked among the trees.
You could still tell something was off, but you didn’t want to address it just yet. He had been saying very little besides the short answers to whatever you had been saying. But as you headed back the shift in him become even more evident.
Having walked the trail and back, you stood outside the cabin once more. The thoughts once again crept back into your mind as you looked at Adrian in the fading sunlight, eyes meeting for only a second before you walked back in to meet Alex and Alec for dinner.
Surprisingly, Alex was an amazing cook. He had grilled some fancy fish-based dish you had never heard of and it was delicious. You all shared stories of past camping experiences, including Alec’s dramatic retelling of an encounter with a bear that he was surely making up, but the whole time you kept catching Adrian sneaking glances at you. Somehow as you cleaned up the dishes your mind kept wandering back to that, and you knew you had to address it.
After a couple more hours of discussion and watching the boys play video games, you all decided to sleep at a timely 1am. Each of you headed to your respective rooms and as you turned out the small light on your night stand and were about to put your headphones in, you heard a small knock at the door.
Adrian walked in, shutting the door behind him quietly as to not disturb the others and he walked over to sit at the edge of your bed. He had changed into some sweatpants and a tight fitting grey shirt, doing nothing but increase how attractive you found him.
“Hi.” He spoke softly, looking a bit uncomfortable.
“Hey? What’s so predominantly on your mind at 2am that you had to come share?”
“I need to tell you something.”
Your heart jumped in your chest as he spoke. Surely there was no way he could tell you were hiding feelings for him, at least you thought that was the case. “Alright, what is it?”
He took a deep breath and finally met your eyes, “Look, this might damage our friendship if you don’t feel the same way but I can’t help but think we could be something more. I don’t know what it is about you, but I think you’re beautiful in every way. I want to know just how deep that beauty goes and you’re the only one who can make me smile the way I do, make me laugh the way you make me laugh, the only one who can look so ridiculously kissable while staring out a window in a car filled with dårar the way that you do.”
You laughed a bit at the last part as you began to process his words. It sank in that it wasn’t as crazy as you previously thought that this beautiful swede could be yours and that you really could have something. You took in his features once more as a smile found it’s way to your face. “God, I thought I was crazy for thinking we could ever be something. Of course I feel the same way Adrian.”
He breathed a sigh of relief as he crawled up closer to you in the bed, pulling you into his arms. He felt like safety, nothing in the world could touch this moment as the man you had be hiding feelings for for a long while held you close to his chest and landed a gentle kiss on your head.
You tilted up to face him and ran your thumb over his bottom lip, so stupidly happy. He finally took the initiative and brought his lips to your own as his hand found your waist. He deepened the kiss as you shifted to move on top of him, one leg on either side of his torso. Sitting up now, he moved his hand along the side of your body and sat up so you two were eye level. You broke away only for a moment to just look at each other and admire what you now had.
“Look at the stars, my love.” He rolled you two over lazily to reach over your body and point out the window and into the night sky as your gaze followed his finger. “Every night that would go by without me telling you how much I cared for you I would look at the sky. That’s the reason I wanted to be here when I told you, so you could see them just as clear as I’ve gotten to. I hope you’ll get to see them with me a lot more now.”
You nearly cried as he spoke, his voice so raw and honest. Curling up into his chest a little more, you took a moment to truly take in the sight as well as your surroundings. The sounds of the woods could be heard in the distance, the stars being slightly reflected in the lakes clear water, and Adrian’s gentle breaths. You traced along the tattoos of the arm he had wrapped around you as he kissed your cheek.
“I think we’re gonna share many nights like this together Adrian, there’s nothing I would want more.”
#adrian kempe#la kings#nhl#nhl imagine#adrian kempe x reader#hockey writing#adrian kempe imagine#la kings imagine#hockey imagines#hockey#nhl fanfic
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smol warning : I drank quite a lot of rum (almost fell in the stairs going up tbh) and I'm bloody tired, it’s way past 1am and I've forgotten to take my tablets again, so I'm really fucked up and this might make no sense as well as be a mess of typos and grammatical mistakes because I can’t fucking seem to speak or spell any goddamn language anymore. you know what you’re getting yourself into.
a little while back you made this post where you just ranted and said things that were, obviously, all about me. but I reckon it must not have been obvious to everyone until the very end where you mentioned me, however as the concerned one, I knew straight away who you were talking about.
not gonna lie, I was really surprised and didn’t quite understand what was going on, really. then I got to the end of your post and literally, my mind was like “what the fuck is going on ??” and I really began telling myself I'd done something wrong, said something wrong. just that I'd gone wrong somewhere, and I didn’t understand, because I couldn’t find what it was nor when it had happened. so it scared me even more, because then I thought the problem came from you, and panic suddenly rushed through me. so I read the post over and over again, and felt really guilty that I hadn’t seen it sooner because I was on desktop and didn’t get a notification for it. I was scared what you would be thinking, or worse, what you’d be doing maybe. I was so, so scared and I didn’t know what I could do to make things better.
in that very moment, I got a bit mad at myself, because obviously I had done something that made you believe you’d done something wrong and/or that I was mad at you, for some reason that remains obscure to this day. as long as it’s gone now, it doesn’t matter though.
I do remember pretty much everything that’s happened between us. from the moment we started talking up until now. I do remember how I literally told you everything about my boy problems and my friend problems (which are kind of the same, come to think of it) not even a month after we’d first talked, it was probably only two weeks after if I'm being honest. and you just listened, all I could have asked for. and then, I remember our first call. I really didn’t think you’d be up for it when I suggested it, so I was genuinely shocked when you immediately said ‘yes’ and then I started to worry about how poorly I would be speaking and how bad my accent must be, because although I speak really well and usually have a pretty good accent, I know for a fact that under pressure I am not as confident and make ridiculous mistakes and then pronounce things in a bit of a weird way. and I don’t think you realise it, but it was actually the real first time I had to hold a full conversation with a native English speaker, apart from the times I've been in England or elsewhere abroad, so doubt not that I was “shitting bricks” as well, though perhaps less (fewer bricks lmao) than you were since I am not as uncomfortable as you are with talking. and I could tell you were really nervous, also because your accent was much thicker than the other times (that I could only tell after the other calls, obviously) but mostly because every (rare) time you spoke, you did it so fast I could barely comprehend what you were saying. and so I thought “she must think I'm either a complete dumbass or that I'm going deaf”, not that any of these statements are false, though. but I figured that since you wouldn’t talk, I'd just do it for you instead. if I'm being honest, I really just thought that if you weren’t okay with it, it’d be your problem and we just wouldn’t call again lmao, since I literally talked about myself for more than an hour straight. but it seems you liked it somehow.
and then a lot of things happened from there, you kept on supporting me no matter it was I told you I was doing, whether it be writing or anything else. you were there through tough times I had to undergo recently.
you also started opening up to me. faster than I thought you would, and I'm mostly saying this because it happened all of a sudden when I least expected it. but I'm really glad you did, and I truly hope I can keep helping you and supporting you in the future as well, that you would trust still.
so, since I know how doubtful you are, and I believe you won’t get it through your head no matter how many times I repeat it, I'll say it here, where everyone can see if they want. I still don’t know why you did that public post about me, but I figured it was only right I did it for you too, and that it was the only way you’d finally hear that, so here. keep all that in mind now, because it’s not that I'm tired of repeating it, but I'm tired of seeing you doubting yourself and your worth.
I love you.
ok ? good ? got that bit ? because I mean it. a lot more than you might think.
I'm thankful for you. I really am, because I never thought I'd make such an amazing friend on this platform, and I didn't especially mean for this to happen, but I couldn’t be happier it did. you’ve done nothing but show love and support, and I know how much you care about me. sometimes, it scares me, not gonna lie. it’s like you’re babying me when I'm really the older one here.
I'm proud of you. that, I shall repeat every day starting now, for I'm not sure how many times you’ve been told this before, and I know for a fact that I haven’t told you that before, which is a mistake. I should have done it a while ago. I'm proud of you, you’re such a sweet, loving, caring, beautiful, intelligent and strong person, and I wish I could help you more. besides, I really feel like I don’t support and show love just as much as you do, and as more days pass, I feel worse and worse about it. I hope you don’t think I don’t love you as much as you love me or anything.
lastly, I'm sorry. for everything that I've put you through, for everything that I will put you through—because we all know one’s problems can’t be resolved in one day, no matter how amazing that would be, so it most likely will happen again—and I'm sorry for making you doubt me and mostly, making you doubt yourself.
I just hope you know I'm here for you, and I'm more than thankful you’re here for me too. I feel like I've been horrible to you, and I'm sorry for feeling like a pineapple so often. I'll work on that.
conclusion : I love you bitch. now I'm off to take my pills 4 and a half hours late and then try to get the sleep I can’t seem to find. worry not, I shall take a nap in the morning before I even get up.
peace out, homie.
@hwangwhatjin
#so#whatever that is#I'm gonna go before I pee my pants cause my bladder is gonna explode soon#idk what to put here really#so just#here's a star for putting up with my shit#bro
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ok so do you ever wonder what would change if napoleon were french? everything else stays the same, but napoleon is french
No I didn’t but this is such a good question, I’m shook. It would change a lot of his background and motivation I think:
He spends almost five years in war occupied France
Like imagine him trying to help the Résistance by starting to sneak around and by gathering information (and also by hiding weapons and stuff)
Him lying about his age just to be able to do something
Of course he gets wind of the persecution of the Jews and tries to help them too (like finding hiding places or ways for them to be able to flee the country)
After the war he starts stealing paintings and antiquities, but not only for the sake of getting rich, but also to return them to Jewish families
He gets caught finally
At this point nobody knows what to do with him because he needs to be punished but his skills would be wasted in prison
I mean, I’m not saying that the SDECE and the CIA fight for their right to recruit him, but I totally am
Finally, the SDECE “wins” but they tell him to work for the CIA (double agent and all)
He accepts, because he has no choice
The next ten years are torture because he fears for his life constantly
He somehow pulls through without getting caught, which he considers to be a damn miracle
UNCLE’s recruitment is a blessing for him and after all these years he’s free finally
And bonus images (because I can’t get them out of my head lmao):
Napoleon being fluent in French (obv of course)
Him having an accent while speaking English etc.
Waverly having to explain both the SDECE and the CIA why he needs them to “lend” Solo (which turns out to be very difficult because suddenly no-one in the SDECE knows how to speak English)
Whenever he does not want to speak to Illya or Gaby he switches to French and pretends to not understand English
A mother of three and a chef (both working for the Résistance) taught him to cook
Him insisting on his name being pronounced correctly
His name being written Napoléon
His middle name being Yves (after his mother who is called Yvette) (I know this is not how middle names work, but let’s pretend it is)
The few friends he has calling him Léon
Illya still calling him “Cowboy” (because he shoots like one)
“I thought you were better at being fashionable.” -> how to start an argument
etc. etc. etc.
You gave me like a million ideas with this ask. Thank you so much for talking to me!! Have a good one :D
#tmfu#napoleon solo#the man from uncle#luekskywlker#sorry this took me so long to answer#i had to sort out my thoughts#or else my reply would have looked like:#saldfsfbjsdfbg??#askdfsdfb!!!#hlaedkdbj!!!#ask#headcanons#*mine#*writing#(also sorry the english is a bit off it is past 1am here and i should be in bed lol)
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MCC April 2017 Trip to Mallorca by Thomas Few
MCC’s intrepid band of rascals departed for the fair isle of Mallorca (or Majorca if you’re English and want to spell it incorrectly) earlier than I thought humanly possible on a Friday morning at the beginning of April. The bus began its rounds at roughly 1am, meaning not one of us had an ounce of sleep that night. The party contained myself (Thomas Few), Chris and the world famous Jack Lee, David Nicholas, Blaine Phelps, Adrian Sullivan, Gareth Jehu, Nigel Jones, Mark Andrews, Anthony Swiss Jam-Boner Big Ring Cowdry and Phil Pryor. A more quality band of men has never been seen.
We arrived at Bristol airport in good spirits considering the lack of sleep and proceeded to the newly refurbished restaurant in the departure lounge, named after the famous engineer Isambard Kingdom Brunel. With a name like that he was always going to do well in life. The true men’s men of the group, myself, Adrian and Gareth opted for a pint of the finest Guinness, whereas most of the other lightweights stuck to non-alcoholic fare. An embarrassing way to start the tour I thought to myself. On my recommendation a few of the boys decided to order the Eggs Benedict. A fine choice indeed and no doubt they will thank for me the recommendation one day, as I feel even before we left the UK, I had improved their lives for the better.
We arrived at our hotel in Puerto Pollensa at around 11am and after a quick and easy check-in, we headed to Palms Bar for lunch before our first ride. In my opinion it was madness to even contemplate riding after a full 24 hours plus with no sleep, but not wanting to appear weak, I went along with it. The bikes were delivered bang on time and we were greeted by what looked like half decent Eddie Merckx bikes. Over time we came to realise they weren’t great. Rumours are flying that the bikes cost a fraction of what we paid for them and Chris embezzled the rest to pay for Jack’s Rapha addiction, but I’m saying nothing.
We headed out to Formentor lighthouse for our first ride, which was a total of 38 miles and plenty of climbing. The views were nothing short of spectacular and after just this one ride I can see why people come back here to ride year on year.
With our first ride out of the way it was time for our first meal at Pollensa Park’s all you can eat buffet. The ride incidentally was a walk in the park for what was to come! The buffet, which featured nearly everything you can think of, was ideal after a long hard day. In my opinion the food may have been too good and too plentiful, as while I may have cycled over 350 miles in Mallorca, I went home weighing 5lbs more than I did at the start of the week! While I did my fair share of eating, it was noted by all that Gareth Jehu knows his way around a plate of food. Underneath that lean physique hides the soul of a fat man. Following a monster feeding session, we headed to Palms for a few pints. Some drank more than others over the course of the week and while I may not set the world alight on my bike, I certainly feel my drinking skillset made up for this.
I shared a room with the one and only Mark Andrews. I had heard many negative stories about Mark’s exploits as a roommate, mostly focussing on his powerful snoring. While I cannot dispel these allegations, as Mark does indeed snore like a mule, it was not as bad as I was led to believe and I did manage to get to sleep. Our room was kept nice and tidy and Mark showed me how to hang my bib shorts over the balcony to dry. Key attributes of a strong tourist. Would I share with Mark again? Yes I would.
Our first ‘proper’ ride of the tour started with a big climb up somewhere called ‘Lluc’, which everyone pronounced as ‘Look’. I came to quickly learn this type of long, gradual climb, with switchback upon switchback is typical of Mallorca. After a descent of the ‘Big Pig’ we eventually made it to lunch at the port of Soller, which was yet another stunning setting with impressive views. Seemingly at the top of every climb and around every corner in Mallorca you’re greeted with incredible views and breath-taking scenery. I’ve said it before, but what a place! After lunch we headed back to Pollensa via some places I can’t remember the names of clocked off with an 88 mile ride to our names. Stirling work. The evening proceeded exactly the same as the previous evening. If you’re interested just read the above bit again.
Day 3 saw us take on the legendary climb of Sa Calobra. Obviously, in Mallorca to get to a climb, you also have to do many other climbs first, the biggest of which was up the Selva gorge. Chris had previously told me this was his favourite climb on the island and I’m inclined to agree. Not too steep a gradient and plenty of shade. Perfect for someone as terrified of the sun as me. I attacked the climb with reckless abandon, finishing ahead of accomplished warriors such as Blaine, Phil and Mark. I was thinking, ‘is this the turning point? Is this my time to shine?’….turns out it wasn’t. After Selva the group split, with Adrian, Mark, Nigel and new recruit Tony heading back down ‘Look’ with the rest of us heading to Sa Calobra.
The road down into Sa Calobra has to be seen to be believed. Just over 6 miles of snaking hairpin bends. Lovely descent, not so lovely climb. One road in, one road out. Following the descent into Calobra we enjoyed lunch at a restaurant overlooking the beach, eating not too much, but not too little. These decisions are critical. Following my big performance up Selva I was excited about the prospect of taking on Sa Calobra. Alas, it did not go well. The first group of myself, Blaine, Dai and Phil set off first, with the racing snakes giving us a bit of a head start. The first two miles went well. Blaine and myself side by side, chatting away, but then it hit me and my world came crashing down around me. Blaine continued on up the road and carried on talking, oblivious to the fact I was now about 50 yards behind and going backwards. He flew up Sa Calobra like a man possessed, all his training paying off big time. The KM King has earned his crown. First Jack and Chris flew past, then Gareth and then Phil. I was in a dark place. 3 miles down, 3 miles to go and I can barely turn the pedals. I am broken. The bonk is real. Next to pass me is Dai. Luckily for me, Dai took pity on me and slowed to my crawling pace and talked me up the rest of the climb. I strongly believe if it wasn’t for Dai I’d still be somewhere on the road halfway up Calobra. What a guy. About an hour later I rolled into the café at the top of the climb a broken shell of a man. I can’t remember what was said to me or what was happening. I don’t know how I managed to get back to Pollensa, but somehow it happened. Another 80 miles in the bag and a lesson in the art of bonking. Later that night we headed in to town to meet Tony for a few beers. Tony is a mate of Blaine’s and is a cycling mad businessman from Basingstoke. He rode a Pinarello. Unfortunately for old Tony it didn’t make him any quicker up those climbs!
Day 4 and some of us decided to take this as a bit of a rest day. The group headed out as usual at 9.30 ish and 25 miles later found ourselves in the beautiful town of Petra. After coffee and cake in the square, myself, Dai, Phil, Nigel and Tony decided to turn around and head back to base. Just 50 miles today thank you. Phil and myself did our best taking turns on the front to get us back in time for a delightful spot of lunch in Tolo’s on the seafront at Pollensa, the place with Bradley Wiggins’ TdF winning bike up on the wall. After lunch Adrian and myself decided to relax by the pool with a beer. One thing led to another and by the time the rest of the group got back I found myself six pints in and apparently slurring. I don’t believe a word of it though and enjoyed a few more at Palms later that night, while presenting an EC Cycles jersey to the owner. While I took all the glory and was centre stage on the Facebook post, in actuality it was Swiss’ jersey. Sorry mate!
Day 5 and we had a big one lined up. The day started with a husband and wife from Cardiff Ajax complementing us on our fabulous new club kit. They were dazzled by the fiery coral (raging pink) and were green with envy at the concept of our ‘home and away’ kit variations. I’ll try to keep this bit far shorter than the ride itself, which was 105 miles or so. It was long. It was hilly. It was hard. We didn’t have lunch until about 4pm. We only just got back before dark. Orient, Deia and Valdemossa were impressive. Swiss swanned off to do Big Pig and Sa Calobra on his own with no food. All in the big ring. Easy. What a day. Myself, Gareth, Blaine, Adrian and Nigel decided to leave the hotel to find a restaurant for a steak. We settled on ‘Hotel Romantico’ which was an ideal location for a bottle of fine red wine. Clearly we were the sophisticated raconteurs of the group.
Day 6. Mark awoke complaining that his backside was sore after yesterday’s ride. I took this with a pinch of salt as most people would. However when Mark showed me what he was talking about I took it all back. Red raw is an understatement. It’s safe to say I’ve never seen anything like it. My attempts at treatment failed, but luckily Dai was on hand with some magic cream to save the day. How Mark got on a bike that morning I will never know, but he only lasted so long before him, Nigel and Adrian headed back early to put their feet up.
The rest of us ploughed on to the monastery atop Sant Salvador. We flew through the lanes chain-gang style at what felt like 40mph and we made it to the base of the climb in no time. I was feeling good so attacked the climb with vigour. I will never learn. After lunch we headed back toward Muro for a coffee. The pace was yet again relentless and Dai was heard to shout from his position at the back of the group ‘Slow down, it’s hard work at the back’. The logic being that the wind goes over the top of the group and then drops at the back, hitting Dai full tilt. I am inclined to agree as I was struggling as well. After a coffee at Muro we headed back to Pollensa. I mentioned earlier that I never learn…the bonk was real and yet again I was broken. This time it was Swiss’ turn to nurse me back onto the group. Eventually we got back to Palms some 95 miles later. A few select Trojans decided to head back out to do some more miles to hit 100. I was not one of them. A few pints at Palms and that was our last night over and done with.
Day 7. Some rode, some didn’t. I certainly didn’t. Our flight didn’t land in Bristol until 1am and I had a wedding to attend the following morning so I didn’t think I needed to add any more fatigue to the equation. Instead a day of shopping, coffee drinking, massages and sitting by the pool was in order. Why we didn’t do all that sooner I have no idea. We departed the hotel later that evening, leaving Gareth behind to spend a few days more in Mallorca with his wife. Incidentally, after 7 hard days on the bike without any damage, Gareth managed to sustain a back injury while relaxing by the pool for a few days with the missus...feel free to insert your own innuendo based pun at this point.
All in all, the trip to Mallorca was a resounding success. No injuries, barring Mark’s backside and no arguments. Miraculous considering Anthony slept on the balcony as Phil’s snoring was so bad! We got in a very solid block of training, had a great time with plenty of laughs and looked like pros in our new kit. What more do you want? Personally, I can’t wait until next year. My plan was to follow Gareth’s lead and stay on for a few days with Alice, but then again I don’t want to come home with a bad back, so maybe it’ll be a boys only trip for me again next year! Thanks for a great week lads and a big thanks to Chris for organising. Bring on Mallorca 2018.
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All For You
AN: Jin was certain the girl he’d fall for would be good at cooking, homely, responsible and well- everything Y/N wasn’t. Opposites attract for a reason, they bring out the best in each other.
Y/N was filling in for Jin’s staff member, who was on maternity leave. It was a last minute request, since she was pretty young and needed a year to figure out what to do after graduating college. Her room mate had suddenly had an estranged relationship, gotten married and was now expecting. Being the caring friend she was, she agreed to fill in for her as she left work suddenly.
“You don’t know the first thing about being a PA do you?’ Her room mate questioned.
‘Nope. How hard can it be though? Get some coffee, answer calls, fill in scheduling dates, right?’
Y/N’s roommate looked queasy as she threw up again in the nearest bathroom. She came back pinching the bridge of her nose.
‘Here’s my diary for Jin. Don’t you dare lose it, follow it, ask him as few questions as possible and please, please, please at least pretend to be responsible, okay?’
Y/N rolled her eyes.
‘This is work, of course I’m going to be responsible.’ She said.
“They have long days. So, you’ll be travelling a lot between the studio, tour locations, Bangtan residence where you may have informal duties like cooking. Just google recipes and don’t mess up.’
‘It’s a good thing you’re pretty, it’ll help you have a few chances.’ Y/N’s roommate said, looking Y/N up and down and deciding she should at least last a month before they decided to get someone new. It would give her enough time to find someone else.
Y/N nearly managed to burn their kitchen down last week, so her roommate was worried beyond belief when Y/N would be in BTS’ apartment for some time.
“Well, look at the time. Wouldn’t want to be late on my first day, would I?’
She kissed her roommate on the head, told her to drink plenty of water and not to start packing her things for moving out into her husbands place until she got back.
Y/N arrived at BigHit studios and was taken to meet the wider staff team before being taken to meet Jin who was having a session with his stylist.
He smiled at her and asked how her room mate was doing. Y/N probably made her first mistake by talking to him too much. She reminded herself of what her room mate told her during her briefing- don’t talk to them too much.
He laughed.
‘Ahh, normally my PA tells me about my schedule for the next few days.’ Jin said,
‘Oh! Right.’ Y/N said, sitting down and tucking a stray hair behind her ear.
She flicked through her ipad where she had copied Jin’s schedule on the metro.
“What date is it today?’ Y/N asked.
Jin looked up at his stylist who was equally as shocked as he was.
Jin was about to politely answer, putting away his thoughts about how incompetent his new PA was seemed already.
‘Ah, no worries! I just checked by SNS.’ She said, seeing what the date was.
“Okay, schedule. Well, you have an interview at 3, practice at 4 in studio 7, English lessons at 10 and then a V Live recording at 12 followed by a sketch preparation at 1am.” Y/N said, worried she’d have to stay until 1! She was usually asleep by the time her room mate got back from work, she had no idea they’d be this busy. She knew they were BTS, but working until 1 in the morning!
“Thank you”. Jin said, now focused on his stylist talking to him about changing some of the colours he wore.
It seemed Y/N didn’t really have anything to do. After telling Jin about his schedule, she was sat there, flicking through the rest of his schedule on her ipad. He was talking about some concept with his stylist, and Y/N couldn’t help but admire his politeness and focus. He was meticulous.
Something she wasn’t.
Y/N was bored to the extent she played some super mario on her phone.
“Hey you! Don’t you know what time it is? Jin Hyung has an interview in 5 minutes! You’re supposed to keep track of stuff like this!” Jin’s stylist yelled.
Y/N checked the time. Shit, she was supposed to remember this stuff!
‘Where’s the location? Is it in the studio?’ Jin asked, trying to keep composed.
‘Uh, oh! It says it’s at KBS? As in KBS studios?’ Y/N mentally cursed herself. Why didn’t she check the location listed down on her ipad? She had assumed everything would be in BigHit studios, but it wasn’t. Her work phone given to her started to ring.
“Hello?’ She asked, confused at who the caller was.
“You’re Jin’s PA’s maternity cover right? I’m V’s PA. Where are you guys?’
‘We’re still at BigHit studios, but we’ll be there in about 15 minutes. I’m so sorry.’ Y/N said.
‘Don’t say sorry to me, apologise to the band and Jin.’ The woman on the other line said.
‘I’m so sorry, I’ll tell you how sorry I am but I need to get you to KBS now.’ Y/N said, and Jin said nothing but march past her and into the elevator.
She quickly caught it, well thanks to him holding it open for her.
‘I’m a good driver. Don’t worry, we’ll get there in no time.’ Y/N said.
Jin laughed.
“Send my good wishes to my PA please. I hope she gives birth smoothly and returns to us as soon as possible”. He said, politely as ever. Thought it cut through Y/N for some reason. She usually didn’t take things to heart. There was something about this guy that made her feel...remorse?
His perfect stature, politeness, puckered lips and well groomed appearance reminded her of some sort of regal prince.
At the end of the lift, they got into a company car and Y/N started to drive.
“We have company drivers, you don’t have to drive.’ Jin said, pointing to the line of men that Y/N had just driven past.
Y/N furrowed her eye brows and couldn’t help but huff in annoyance. She had already started heading up to the motorway.
The rest of the ride was silent, Y/N noticed Jin was doing something on his phone so he was quiet.
“We’re nearly there.’ Y/N said in a quiet voice as she pulled into the media centre.
Jin stayed quiet as he knew she’d made him late.
“Are you going to remind me of what I need to do next, or shall I carry a planner around myself?’ Jin asked, politely laughing. Again, it wasn’t meant to be rude but it cut through to Y/N for a reason she didn’t know. She worked before, and getting shouted at didn’t phase her. For some reason, she felt guilty and wanted to impress Jin.
“I’ll make sure. Don’t worry, enjoy your interview.’ She replied, using her card to let him into the building.
From there, it was like a well machined clock. Jin was swept up by some important looking people who took him into a studio and Y/N waited outside the interview room, keeping track of time.
“So you’re the maternity cover?” A noona asked Y/N approaching her with another woman. They both had an ipad in hand and ID draped around her neck.
“That’s me, I’m guessing you’re V’s PA?’
The noona nodded.
“I’m Jimin’s.” The other noona said.
“She’s pretty, no? She’ll survive with a face like that.” Jimin’s noona said.
“Forgetting times and what places to be is one of the worst and most rookie mistakes you can make as an idol PA. You’re pretty, so maybe they won’t get rid of you so quickly. Mess up a few more times, and you’re out.’ V’s PA said as a word of advice.
“I understand. It won’t happen again.” Y/N said, more to herself than the other PA’s.
They smiled. “Just make sure the member knows that.’ V’s PA said, before asking a bit more about Y/N and her room mate who was expecting. Y/N was sure to keep track of time, and even stopped talking with the other PA’s to make sure she caught Jin at the right time.
“They all have practice, so you won’t forget. We’ll just go with them.” The other PA’s said. This meant Y/N was being extra cautious for no reason. Soon enough, the band came out and Y/N got a proper look at them all together.
They were still talking amongst themselves whilst they exited the studio, talking about how the interview went and what to do for their next practice.
Y/N figured she didn’t need to do anything here, Jin clearly knew what he was doing next so she followed along.
Soon enough, Y/N became more comfortable being a PA for Jin. He didn’t talk to her much, and when Y/N asked her room mate if that was normal her room mate disagreed.
“For a band, they’re really respectful of their staff. If you’ve done something wrong, maybe he doesn’t like you.”Her room mate said, ironing baby clothes.
“I forgot he had an interview at KBS on the first day I started, then I fell asleep around 11 during his practice and forgot to remind him of a shooting quite a few days after. Do you think he’ll take the last one to heart especially?’
Y/N’s room mate sighed.
‘Duh, you’re so irresponsible Y/N. He must be thinking how you’re a PA.’ Her room mate said as she picked up the ironed clothes and put them in the last of her suitcases, ready to move out soon.
‘Well, what can I do to make him feel better, or maybe keep me?’ Y/N asked. She didn’t know why, but she hated not being able to be liked by Jin. The other members were courteous around her. She could tell they weren’t free though like with the other PA’s. Y/N had probably stacked up a reputation as being irresponsible.
“Just be responsible. That’s your biggest challenge.’ Her roommate said, taking a break to lie down as she patted her swollen stomach.
Y/N knew that. She had to be responsible as a person taking care of another person.
“Does he like cookies, is he allergic to anything?’
“Mhmm, you can’t cook but you make the best cookies. Everyone loves cookies. If you make some, save some for me.”Her room mate drawled out, dozing off.
Y/N did just that. She couldn’t cook, but for some reason she could bake. It was simple for Y/N, a clear and cut process that was a science. She could also be creative.
The next day, Y/N decided she’d turn a new leaf after her conversation with her room mate last night. She came into Bangtan residences that morning, armed with coffee and her own assortment of cookies.
“Cookies and coffee?” She timidly asked Jin, who was what it looked like, play scolding Jungkook at the kitchen table.
Jin was suprised but kept it masked well, in his polite facade. He turned around to face her. Jungkook got the better hand though.
‘Cookies? Thanks Noona!’ He said, playfully taking one out of the bag.
‘Mmm, so good!’ Jungkook yelled, filling his face to the extent he looked like an overwhelmed bunny.
Jungkook seemed so infatuated by the cookies he took a bag and went off into his own world, going upstairs to show off how he would eat the cookies without giving any to his hyungs.
“Thank you.” Jin said, politely as ever. He took the coffee and sipped on it.
“Can I try?’ He shyly asked, a genuine laugh coming after.
‘Of course, I made them for you.’ Y/N blurted. She instantly regretted it. Her face looked like one that was caught in headlights.
Jin found it endearing. Maybe a little too endearing as he found his new PA’s expression the cutest. It made him laugh.
‘Woaow!’ Jin said, taking a bite out of the double chocolate chip cookie.
Y/N was laughing at his expression. His chewing was borderline erotic.
‘These need to be on Eat Jin, how much more did you make?’
Y/N smiled. She had won over Jin with her batch of double chocolate chip cookies. It was a success for her. She held out the other bag.
“Mhhm, mine.’ Jin suddenly said, grabbing the other cookie bag.
Jin was on his third cookie now. Y/N was surprised at how he fast he ate. She knew he was known for his delicious eating habits, but this was something else.
“Milk. I need to eat this drinking milk.’ He said, gulping a carton of milk alongside the cookies.
Y/N’s expression betrayed her. He was now on his 5th cookie.
Jin looked at her from the corner of his eye whilst on his second carton of milk, her expression making him laugh.
“This is what happens when you feed me.” He said, before gulping some more milk down.
“Ahh. I’ll save the rest for later.” He said satisfied, finishing the 5th cookie and 2nd carton of milk.
“Okay, we have a schedule to follow today. You have a fitting at 12, followed by practice with the rest of the-”
“You’ve improved.” Jin said leaning his arms on the kitchen counter, cutting Y/N off.
“As in?”
“Well, you’re not forgetting my appointments anymore.” He laughed.
Y/N blushed.
“Waaoah, that blush will make men cry!” Jin yelled, amazed at what he thought was a cute flush of temporary colour to her cheeks.
“Jin, schedule.” She reminded, owing up to her ‘responsible’ side.
“Right. Okay, go on”, Jin said.
As Y/N continued to detail Jin though his schedule, he really looked at Y/N. Obviously she was pretty, but Jin was annoyed by that at first. He thought she was innocently beautiful. He couldn’t say something bad to her face. Now, he really appreciated the girl standing in front of him. He shouldn’t think of it like that, she was his PA and a really pretty PA at that. But, that blush, her forgetfulness which had amused him and how he could see she was trying to improve to be better to him all captured him at that moment, the amazing cookies being the last straw to his boundary with Y/N. She really was sorry for her mistakes.
“So, you have an hour of free time before we get to the fitting.” Y/N said.
“An hour?! Really? Hmmm what to do.” Jin contemplated.
“Have you played super mario before?’ He asked Y/N.
Y/N wanted to say yes, because she was a self obsessed Mario freak. But she reminded herself she was supposed to be professional for once in her life.
“I’ve heard of it.” She lied.
“Heard of it?! Come on woman, let me introduce you to a legend”. Jin said, pulling Y/N by her sleeve.
On their living room couch, Y/N and Jin started to play a game Jin had grown up with. He found her sass matched his when she let loose a bit in that short space of time they had before Jin needed to be somewhere. Jin’s feelings were slowly growing for the cute PA he had met, who had wanted to make amends from her entertaining mistakes and now was kicking his ass in super Mario. At first, she was the opposite of everything he thought he’d be interested in. Everyone nicknamed her to be irresponsible, but here Jin saw she was much more emotionally responsible than he thought at first.
Her forgetfulness was endearing to him, because she didn’t mean it. Maybe Jin was already far too smitten from the day he met her, but he could say one thing: suddenly he had started falling hard and fast.
AN: Jin is someone that is your straight up husband material, and less angsty than Namjoon and Jungkook (my other stories) for sure, so I was a bit worried about how he would express interest in a girl. He wouldn’t be too angsty about it, shy, but lively when he trusts someone.
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Jumin’s Day 10, 1AM Call - Korean vs. English Comparison
Hello all.
Sorry for my lack of posting for the past few days. To be honest, I went through so much stuff that I just don’t know how to handle right now. I also went through course registration for my upcoming semester and I filled 22 credits. Kill me.
Without getting too personal, just know that I am slowly getting back to the way things were going and I hope to keep it that way ^^
Also, in my little unannounced absence, I got a lot more requests to go through! Wow! I can’t believe I got so much interest from all of you guys~ thanks so much! The anon may know this, but while I usually answer questions/requests in the order of which they are submitted (minus the personal questions), I went through them all and found this one to be the quickest to gather screenshots and answer/debate. I am a bit short on time because of current affairs, so I please hope that you guys understand that I am answering this one first!
This call is by far my favorite call in history. Why is this man so irresistible? My love for Jumin Han is just out of this world. In all my 23 years of living, he is the most charismatic character I have ever come across, I swear.
Please join me under the cut if you would like to hear my analysis (more like opinion) of this breath-taking phone call ^^
Please note that although this is an analysis, there may be opinions that may differ or be consistent with mine! While I can give some sort of Korean background, for debatable topics, I do not represent all of the Korean minds for respective topics. Also, please excuse any errors or let me know if clarifications are needed, for English is not my first language! Thank you and enjoy!
Okay, so let’s talk. Nonny! You said there were four options, and to be honest, I don’t even know if I unlocked all the options…if I remember correctly, I only got three? So I am sorry in advanced if I didn’t get all the ones you wanted ㅠㅠ when I replay Jumin’s route when I have the time, I will check out the other choice (really want to know rn tbh…) and edit this post, but for now, I will just do the three that I have.
Also, note that this call is preeeeetty similar in terms of how they translated it compared to my translations so I probably won’t post as many screenshots. But the ways I interpreted could be different, but more than an analysis, this is more about how I perceived and how much I enjoyed this call, because lol, I did…♡
So we start off with Jumin sighing as soon as he answers the call. To which the English version says, “God…” which I don’t actually know why it does?
The Korean version just has it written out as it is which is, “하…” (Ha…)
He asks why you are up and calling him at this hour since he was sure he told you to sleep. Also to stop fidgeting and whatnot. To which you have two choices.
Choice 1: 그럼 머리 쓰다듬어 줘요, 잠이 안와요. My translation & translation version are the same: Then stroke my hair, I can’t sleep.
Choice 2: 후~ 이렇게 바람 부는 건 괜찮아요? My translation & translation version are the same: Hoo~ can I blow wind like this?
I am a 여우같은년 (fox like simply put, bitch lol) and I blew wind to him first buuuuuut, I’ll go with the stroke my hair choice first ^^;;;;
He says something like telling you to come closer and proposes a deal. He will stroke your hair if he can feel with his body that you are closer to him. I’m not posting a screenshot because my translation is pretty similar and only has minor differences so it would seem a bit pointless.
Choice 1: 그런 게 어딨어요? 그냥 쓰다듬어주세요. What is that? Just stroke my hair. Translation version: Don’t be like that. Just stroke my hair.
Choice 2: 그럼 그냥 자겠습니다. Then I will just go to sleep. Translation version: I’ll just go to sleep now.
I know this man. I think we all know this man. He is a businessman and without even thinking, I just said at first in my playthrough that I would go choice two because lol, I could already predict that he would lecture me about dealing with a businessman buuuut, let’s start with choice one.
Lol, and well, this choice was really boring. It was boring because I was right lolol. He said something really similar to my business professor and I was very usgohiahp about the choice. I mean, he’s right, and honestly I used this material for a business meeting simulation and got brownie points (is that the right expression? lolol) but still. I want to make this man tempted LOL.
Let’s go the choice two.
Hmm? That, I don’t like. Don’t turn your back on me. I don’t want to miss a single moment of your sleeping face/appearance(?).
Lol, Jumin, what was that you said about your wonderful business philosophy? ( ͡͡ ° ͜ ʖ ͡ °)
After that, he says something about how he wants you to hold your chin up and that even if it is uncomfortable, it can’t be helped because he is selfish and wants to see your face and omg i was red while relistening to this call pls help.
He also says how we should talk responsibility for being so nice to him and making him the way he is right now and uh, yeah, I’ll take responsibility anyday. Take me now pls.
I’ll talk about how the call ends for all the choices soon at the end, but for now, let’s go back to the very first choices we came across in this call.
We will blow air and lol, yeah. It’s my favorite. It was like some crazy ASMR shit and I get goosebumps every time.
You tempt him and he was briefly about to since he was contemplating to himself whether he should keep his cool or not.
If you chose this choice then you all know he wants to teach you a lesson and blow into your ear to proof how sensitive of an area it is and to feel how tempted he was and lol, I died.
I live by myself and the apartment next to me came running thinking I was in trouble. He thinks I’m crazy now lolol. It was like 1 in the morning. Sorry 오빠♡
Okay, so this is where I can’t for the love of God remember if there was only one choice or two. Because nonny said four choices, I am going to assume I didn’t get one here. Please let me know if that is the case =w=
I understand…I won’t do it.
LOL, if there were two choices, I don’t know what came across me to choose that one because I would have been shook and just jumped the man, but apparently I chose this one haha.
It’s too late to regret it now. Since you started it…hang up and look forward to it.
I think the English translation version is very similar to mine. Too lazy to check lolol.
Then as we all know, he wants to hang up since it is “only getting in the way” and the wonderful, “거기 가만히 있어…” (stay still).
Man, the way he says that made me feel like I was going crazy. I could not sleep that night LOL.
Okay, so your debate! What did they do after that phone call?
Goooood question! ( ͡°⁄ ⁄ ͜⁄ ⁄ʖ⁄ ⁄ ͡°)
Well, I am definitely not an innocent mind lolol. I don’t know how to put it without sounding extremely creepy but I mean Jumin did say to look forward to what was going to happen after hanging up and I mean, my mind was already ready to pounce that man, sooooooo.
As the MC of MM in my own mind and imagination, lol. We can all assume how I think and they aren’t innocent thoughts. shoot me.
For one, he is a grown 27 (26 for outside of Korea) year old man and if anything, MC me, you, us asked for it if we were pretty much testing his patience and teasing him like that ;)
A lot of you guys know how I feel about Jumin and the topic of sexual experience because I talked about it in my old account. There were many implications in the Korean version, and frankly, the world realistically isn’t just some rainbows and unicorn thing or some magical shoujo experience where love is always innocent, as we all know.
Which is why I like this game. I mean, yes there are fictional aspects about it that definitely is too good to be true, but it isn’t so much where I can’t play it. I am usually not a fan of otome games because of many reasons. I could feel 심규혁 (Yoosung’s voice actor) in his free talk about how he was trying not to sound “오글오글” (I think it means closest to cheesy?). I think even with some cheesy aspects, I could relate to a lot of these characters because even if they are in a fictional game, they all have a pain of sorts and it isn’t always happy-go-lucky.
That was a random tangent.
So simply put, to give my answer to this debate, yeah, I’m pretty sure something went down, at least in my imagination and that is how I want to think of it ( ̄▽ ̄)ノ
I have my fantasies too (^ //// ^)
I want to hear what you guys think? What was your reaction to this famous call of Jumin’s? Either leave a comment or send an ask below~^^
- 류설♡
#askseol#mystic messenger#수상한 메신저#jumin han#mystic messenger jumin#deep route#i love jumin#mystic messenger translations#mystic messenger asks#mm jumin
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On a trip to Jordan and Lebanon (in 2013), I had options for flying. One option was non-stop back to the US, or stay a night in Vienna. Seeing Vienna as a stop excited me and it turned out to be the cheapest option. Being a Beethoven fan, I had longed for many years to visit Vienna and now was my chance.
Booking a Room
While waiting to leave Jordan, I went online to book a room at a hostel in Vienna. The layover would be 16 hours and I figured getting a little sleep would be nice. Long story short, I had no money in my checking account (transfers in Jordan didn’t exist at ATM’s) and all I had was about $25, enough to take a train into town, get something to eat, and take the train back. No worries I figured, thinking God would hook something up in Vienna.
Upon arriving to Vienna, to put it simply, I was exhausted. I was with a team visiting a refugee camp and we left on separate flights from Amman. Everyone’s flight was in the evening, mine the next afternoon. Not having much money, I stayed overnight at the Amman airport, at a Starbucks. We had spent the day before at the Dead Sea, in 100° heat, a quick dinner, and then to the airport. I was stinky. Trying to sleep, I was a bit paranoid in being alone, and I was bothered by a fly that would land on my face. 15 hours later, I was on my flight to Vienna.
In Vienna, it was about 8pm when I found a the train into town. The train was about $15 roundtrip, leaving me with $10 cash for a night on the town in Vienna. I put some Beethoven on (Mass in C) my headphones for some mood music.
Arriving in town, oh my, the beauty of the city just struck me. The sun had already gone down, but there was still a slight blue glow low on the horizon. In the distance I could see a tall, glowing white tower spiking into the sky. I didn’t know where to go for anything, so I headed for that.
In the Back of My Mind
As I was making my way, I was at a crossroads. it was getting dark and despite the beauty of the city, I was thinking about “I need a place to stay tonight.” But I was also in sensory overload. The streets became sort of a maze to me, and I didn’t want to get lost from the train station.
I Look Like a Bum
It started to also dawn on me that the city felt a little more upscale than I had expected, and then there was me. I had a trip beard going on which looked rather bum-ish. Then I had baggy pants, a dark hoody, and a backpack. Most of the people there were dressed nice, clean-shaven, no bags, and didn’t look like they’d been awake for 2 days (stinky). The lure explore outweighed my thoughts on my appearance.
St. Stephens Cathedral, Vienna
I finally found what the large white tower was. It’s a huge cathedral at the center of the old town. And when I say huge (I don’t think my pictures do it justice) I mean huge. My head had to be tilted all the way back to see all the way up. It was amazing. I was trying to figure out the name of it, but all the writing on the outside was in German, and was also hard to read if I could see it. Circling around, I found the entrance by following someone who looked like they were sneaking in. Finding a spot in some pews, I stopped to relax a minute. After a short prayer to Jesus, I stood up just as I was getting sleepy. Security came by to say the church was closing for the night.
Leaving, I still didn’t know where I was or where I was going. So I asked someone, “where am I?” and they said the place is called St. Stephens Cathedral.
That Which is Golden
Soon I found myself in the midst of a bunch of great-looking cafes, but they looked like they would be expensive, Passing by many, I saw a glowing sign of something I could afford…the golden arches of McDonalds (sorry to all you foodies). After eating a burger, which I must admit was mighty good, I went back outside to walk. Fatigue hit me quickly but I tried to push on to exploring the city and was just amazed at the architecture.
At 11pm fatigue set in and I felt done. The bustling streets began to quiet down. Many of the sites I wanted to see were all dark. Depression started hitting me. I was in an amazing city but I was physically done. The lights were out and I was in the street. I went back to the cathedral to sit on a bench there and sleep. For safety I thought at least I would be in an open square.
It Just Felt Cold
Near the cathedral, I saw a homeless man sleeping on front of a store called Humanic. He was the first I had seen. At least I wasn’t alone. I sat hoping to fall asleep. A few minutes passed and I felt the cool breeze I was previously enjoying. However, it just felt cold. I was starting to wonder just how cold it would get. Each way I turned to face, the cold would hit me differently. I figured if I could just fall asleep I wouldn’t notice the cold.
As I began to doze off, a lady came up to me to ask me something in was in German. I just shrugged and asked if she spoke english. She chuckled and shrugged at me, and walked off. After that, I couldn’t sleep. By this time, it was only 11:30. I felt a panic wondering I how was I would last til sun-up. After sitting there a bit, I looked and saw the golden arches of McDonalds again. It was the only place open…warmth.
Warming Up
I went in for some coffee (and a couple cheap burgers…I admit). It was warm and had a comfortable seat. I noticed one lady in there who sat alone, not eating or drinking. She was in there when I first came through a couple hours before. I was wondering if she too was homeless. As I sat there eating slowly, I think I fell asleep in my seat. I don’t remember anything between looking at her and feeling a hand push me, finding my face down on the table. I was told I was not allowed to sleep there. Then the place was closing and I had to leave.
It’s Night, but Day is Coming
I looked at the clock in hopes hours had past, but then it was only 1am. I was more sad. It was too cold so sit on a bench, McDonalds was closed, and my legs felt done. I was thinking of just heading back to the airport to sit and sleep, but I felt like I would miss out on Vienna.
At my lowest feeling, I felt a spoken encouragement that it’s night, but day is coming. That gave me a little energy to just keep walking. It became enough energy to circle most of the city (old Vienna) a few times. About 5 laps of the city took me a few slow hours. It was dark, but I just loved the buildings. I would just stand and look for a while. Time passed without much thought.
I love looking up at the sky in early evening
A man sitting at the Temple Mount in Jerusalem
I found cool parks, even one dedicated to Beethoven, but it was too dark to see anything. I found a beautifully lit opera house, but it was closed for closer inspection. Further, I found Franciscan plaza called Franziskanerplatz, but the church there was closed. However, there was an interesting statue of Moses still lit up, at least for a couple minutes while I was there. The lights went out quickly.
I was doing ok, surprisingly, but then a problem hit me. Being dehydrated from the day before (100 degrees at the Dead Sea) I felt a need for the WC (bathroom). Problem again…where?!
After searching for an hour, I finally found a hotel lobby and did my business. Back outside, I could see the night sky returning to a faint blue hue. Morning was here. The night was finally over and I had the city to myself. The streets were empty. I could walk and stand anywhere for a photo…and I did. The fatigue had lifted and I just felt a new day as the city slowly awoke.
With Vigor
Now that the sun was coming up, I could think of many places I had seen in the dark and wanted to photograph in the light. Knowing my way around now, I was on a mission. From parks, lights, alley ways, statues, and even ducks, I was in sort of a paradise. I’ll let the pictures speak.
EDITORIAL Product photos used and featured in many editorial articles in both print and web.
Hollywood Bowl – the Muse This photo won in a contest at the Hollywood Bowl. It was featured in their printed program and on the Hollywood Bowl website.
Yasiel Puig signing autographs
Yasiel
Back to the Airport
Making my way back to the train station, I saw a lady sleeping at the backdoor steps of St. Stephens Cathedral. I wondered if it was the same lady I had seen in the McDonalds. So I walked up to place a couple euros next to her head, but she heard me approach (my silent batman skills were lacking). She barked at me, but I just showed her the coin and said “coffee!” I set it down and just walked away. Walking away, a few minutes later I saw the real lady. She was sitting in a crowded bakery, but she sat alone.
Jesus In Vienna
I began to think or understand (I think?) what it must be like to be truly homeless. You have nowhere to go. The temperature is what it is. Need to use WC? You want someone to talk to? For me, I knew it had all been temporary. But for her? I had a plane ticket and a few dollars. I had friends who seek me out and sacrifice for me. But what about her? In a sense I knew I was taken care of by God, and in my limited understanding, I know she is too. But, I couldn’t help but now think I was given a brief glimpse into the feeling and the responsibility I have in helping my fellow neighbor. It’s fine to say God looks out for her and others, but maybe God wants to use us just as much to help others as He helps us? Vienna wasn’t too bad a place to be homeless, at least for one spring evening. But there are places far scarier and real people are there? In all my wanderings that night, I now see that I met Jesus at the end of that night, and Jesus wasn’t just my plane ticket out of there, He was the person sitting alone and cold, hiding alone in a crowd.
One Last Stop
On the train to the airport, I made one stop. It was an old graveyard where Beethoven is buried. My time was a bit short and I didn’t know where to go. Taking the long way around in the graveyard, it gave me some time to reflect on my night. Most of the graves I saw were very old, from the 1700’s and on. They were quiet, of course. It made me wonder how these people sort of built the city I was looking at, but they were gone. So many names I knew nothing about and I wondered who they were.
Upon finding Beethoven’s grave, I could tell you who he is. It’s amazing to me that a deaf composer has such a legacy, but that’s not what I know him for. I know him for his passion to pursue his art, to pursue beyond his suicidal thoughts, beyond his frustrations, beyond the criticisms of his contemporaries, all with an abiding sense of God being with him. I can’t compose a lick of music, but in my own way, the inspiring take away has been to stay with God, even in dark nights. The depression is real and the circumstances are real, but so is hope. It’s cliche, but waiting for the next day, it’s so worth it that I can’t begin to describe the feeling of cold going to warm, dark to light, dead to life, and from deafness to hearing.
Jesus said,
“Now there was a rich man, and he habitually dressed in purple and fine linen, joyously living in splendor every day. And a poor man named Lazarus was laid at his gate, covered with sores, and longing to be fed with the crumbs which were falling from the rich man’s table; besides, even the dogs were coming and licking his sores. Now the poor man died and was carried away by the angels to Abraham’s bosom; and the rich man also died and was buried. In Hades he lifted up his eyes, being in torment, and *saw Abraham far away and Lazarus in his bosom. And he cried out and said, ‘Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus so that he may dip the tip of his finger in water and cool off my tongue, for I am in agony in this flame.’ But Abraham said, ‘Child, remember that during your life you received your good things, and likewise Lazarus bad things; but now he is being comforted here, and you are in agony. And besides all this, between us and you there is a great chasm fixed, so that those who wish to come over from here to you will not be able, and that none may cross over from there to us.’ And he said, ‘Then I beg you, father, that you send him to my father’s house— for I have five brothers—in order that he may warn them, so that they will not also come to this place of torment.’ But Abraham *said, ‘They have Moses and the Prophets; let them hear them.’ But he said, ‘No, father Abraham, but if someone goes to them from the dead, they will repent!’ But he said to him, ‘If they do not listen to Moses and the Prophets, they will not be persuaded even if someone rises from the dead.’” – Luke 16
Homeless in Vienna On a trip to Jordan and Lebanon (in 2013), I had options for flying. One option was non-stop back to the US, or stay a night in Vienna.
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8/16/2017, 10:07PM, Feeling Kind Of Gross
My name is Cynthia. I usually go by Theia.
I’ve been reading a lot of self care things, and almost all of them suggested starting a journal. So that’s what I aim to do with this blog. I would start a handwritten one, but my handwriting is so god awful that I’ve never been able to keep one up for very long.
See I’ve already written a lot of this up but the app crashed so uh guess I have to remember what all I wrote. What’s funny is that so many of those guides said to disconnect, to turn off your phone and not look at any notifications. Problem is, I don’t think I’d be able to do that. The internet has always been a huge part of my life, even before I was ever on it full time like I am now. I maybe that’s an issue I’ll have to deal with later in life, but now it just feels very holier-than-thou to say you shouldn’t look at it all when you’re trying to take care of yourself. Sure, it works for some people. But not all. Not me. I get anxiety related to not being able to connect with people. Again, the reason I’m here.
So introductions seem odd, since I’m probably going to be the only one reading this. Maybe just some statements about where I am in life? I’m 21. I identify as female (I am cis), using she/her pronouns. I am at a bit of an impasse when it comes to my sexual orientation, which is too much to go into now. I work at an inn in a small college town in Ohio. I am not a student. I live with my roommate, who is currently kind of driving me crazy. She has a cat that kicks litter all over the bathroom because she doesn’t fill it past one inch. She also doesn’t pay for anything. I have been supporting two of us. I am about 165lbs~, but would like to at least get down to 150lbs for health reasons.
There are a lot of things I would like to do, one of them being budget a little better. I currently pay for everything for two people on one persons paycheck. Rent is $550, my phone is $150, my car is $150, internet is $65, and utilities are about $100~ a month. I can’t keep doing this. With groceries and other essentials added in, as well as helping her pay for what the cat needs, I do not have nearly enough.
However, thinking about this situation has lead to me becoming much more stressed than is healthy. I also want to start doing more things to help my body, to keep myself on track. One is fixing my sleep schedule. I want to start going to bed around 12:30PM, latest being 1AM. I want to start waking up around 9:15AM every morning. I know that, technically, it is healthier to go to bed and get up earlier, but seeing as how I don’t get off of work until 11:00PM every night, that is difficult. I have begun to set alarms to make myself do things that will help, like showering and brushing my teeth every day. I also want to begin washing my face more throughly, since my acne has gotten so bad it hurts. Once I get to the point where I can save up some money, I also would like to start experimenting with makeup and nail care. And fix my diet. Basically I’ve been a mess and I would like to fix it.
What else? I’ve been playing a lot of Fallout, both New Vegas and 4. I love those games. Oh, I’ll need to start being a little more affirmative with my best friend borrowing my laptop.
So, what happened today. I woke up, I think around 9:30AM (not bad!), milled around the internet for a while, then went to pick up my best friend for a hair appointment she had scheduled at 11:00AM. I thought it would only take an hour and a half, but she didn’t get out until about 1:40PM. In the time between, I ate a (very late) breakfast, and played some Fallout New Vegas. Helped a couple escape The Strip from one of the Families, the Omertas to be specific. I’m having some trouble deciding how I’m going to go about completing this game. On one hand, done wrong, an independent New Vegas could be a serious cesspool. On the other hand, Mr. House simply wants to destroy the entire Brotherhood of Steel because they don’t see eye to eye. I’m not sure if I agree with that. Anyway, I picked my friend up, grabbed my laptop from home, and she offered to buy us ice cream. Lord knows I can never say no to that, so we got medium cones. I got vanilla, she got swirl. We both got a ton of sprinkles. So we went back to her house, and I spent some time with her until I left for work around 2:40 due to traffic. School is back in session, so there were buses everywhere. After three months of near dead roads, it was a bit jarring to spend a good three minutes unable to turn out of the driveway. My clockin time was listed a 2:52PM, thanks to favorable traffic. I unfortunately stop keeping track of time while at work, but it was hectic. As I’m writing this, it is 9:51PM and I have an hour and nine minutes left until I leave, but luckily it seems to have died down. We have a lot of international students staying with us, most of which are quite talented at English. Being bilingual is an automatic way to gain my respect, seeing as how I never got the chance to learn a second language. One of our regulars, James, brought me some banana bread from the Bob Evans next door. I was a bit bummed that Dennis didn’t hang out longer tonight, but I think our friendship has gotten a bit of a splinter in it ever since he defended what our president said about what had been happening recently, with the return of the Nazis. I never thought we’d see the day. But I don’t like thinking about it. I know in a way, that is actually making it worse. Speaking up is important, and I encourage those with the gall to do so, raise your voices high. I’m sorry I cannot follow your example.
I think I’m going to have Taco Bell for dinner. We don’t have much at home and what I get is usually under $5. Hope my best friend doesn’t mind I bring food to her house when I spend some more time with her before heading home. I need to wash my hands. I also need to do the dishes. Two birds with one stone I suppose.
#edit: it was not two birds with one stone#it was actually more like one clean spoon and two pitchers caked in batter#and starting to mold
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Just how much can I date someone who I’m not “dating”? #SENDHELP
Good god, back for my daily dose of drama in the currently ever-so-boring life of me, myself, and I. I guess I probably have a lot to update you on if you follow me fairly consistently on here, considering I pretty much fell off the grid in the last 6 months. Yeah, about that... Truly my most sincerest apologies. I really needed to make it through the end of my final undergrad year and, while I truly value my creative juices, I’m afraid every last drop of it was used to will me through the end of my last year. Good news though- those years are over and I’ve sworn to myself that I’m never going to spend any form of any type of extended period in my life doing something I don’t want to do. USC Business School anyone? Yeah that’s what I’m talking about.
But that’s all you really need to know about that, so quickly moving on...I’m going to skip you guys right up to today, and I’ll fill in the blanks as we go along.
Remember Conrad? Well the name hits a little too close to home and so I think we are going to call him Oliver. Although that does sound very English. Which actually, on second thought, now seems ideal since he is South African and Irish. So today I decided it’s time for me to find a way to break this up nicely. Wait. Did you just read that right? As in drop him?
Yes, yes, yes hear me out. Things smoothed out over the spring thanks to our many genuine conversations over winter break that clearly needed to happen. So after a number of conversations over winter break, we finally were able to chill out for a couple months. Until he pissed me off at Ultra in March and then I got over him and then when he kissed me when I saw him in April I fell all over again. Okay. So, it’s been a bit of a roller coaster ride. But we are both still on it, which blows my mind. Well at least I thought we were.
My graduation was on May 17th, and Ollie was supposed to come home then. That night. We hadn’t seen each other in two months and despite how stubborn the both of us can be, we had gotten to the point where we were texting back and forth, “I miss you”. Exactly, 20 minutes after our plane landed in the U.S., I received a message from him, “Is someone back in America?” Suffice to say, we were excited to see each other.
However, things got real choppy real quickly. I smoked with my friend Alex as I always do when I return from vacation. Then I went over to say hi to my other friends- Andy and Charlie- who I haven’t seen in ages. Charlie was back in town before being deployed out to Newport Beach for training camp, so I especially wanted to make sure I got to say hi to him.
As I had been texting Ollie on the way back from the airport, I learned that two of his housemates from school were staying with him for the weekend. Cool- I had met them before and I liked his housemates- Awesome. I met up with them out at the bars, but was too tired to drink. That night, twice, Conrad called himself my boyfriend. And that was the beginning of the great fall of the domino wall.
It drove me nuts. It’s been driving me nuts. How could he do that to me?! He knows I’ve been wanting to be in a relationship with him now since last summer. You can’t just say you don’t want to be in a relationship and then just start calling yourself my boyfriend without even asking me about it. Of course I was pissed. And to top it off, when I asked him about it after we had gotten back to his house and hooked up, he laughed, claimed he and the guy made “friendly conversation”. I called him on his bullshit and he just pulled me closer, and murmured “friendly conversation” in my ear as we dozed off.
But of course this was going to keep bugging me, because who would it not bug. When I finally talked to him about it, he chalked it up to me “making too big of a deal out of it” and that he had done it simply to get that “creepy guy” away from us. Coward. What a fucking coward. That hurt. You think I couldn’t read right through that. But seriously WHO DOES THAT? So instead of owning what he said, he pretty much told me I was overthinking it. It kept bugging me so I kept bringing it up until I more or less said, “look just don’t say it unless it’s true”. At which point he responded, “Understood”.
But since my little freak out at him, things haven’t been the same and I’m wondering if I’m to blame for it. I can’t figure this guy out at all. He invites me to his grandparent’s christmas eve party to meet them. His mom knows I sleep over (he actually told me this past weekend that his mom is cool with me sleeping over but doesn’t want him having random girls in his bed. Like oh okay cool, your mom is on my side) and is only okay with it because it is me. I’ve met both of his parents. He’s told me tons about his family. And even when I was with him last weekend, he was kissing the back of my head and stroking my hair. He had his arm around me and at one point had my head in his lap (face up, not face down. Get your mind out of the gutter!). But what does all of that matter if the only hours we see each other are between 1am and 7am on Sunday morning? WHAT IS THAT BULLSHIT?! Are you freaking kidding me? It doesn’t matter how into a girl you act, if those are the only hours you’ll hang out with her, shes a booty call. A straight booty call.
But it’s been driving me nuts. We’ve only hung out once when it wasn’t between the hours of 2am to 6am and I practically had to go to his place to get him. We watched a movie and hooked up and even then he didn’t seem that into it. Well I mean the sex part, yes but otherwise he just didn’t seem to care.
He’s got some other stuff going on in his life- family and otherwise- but that’s not an excuse for why he cannot find a single daylight hour to spend with me and if he likes me, then this shouldn’t be this difficult. And I finally realized this is going to haunt me down to Miami if I don’t do something about it and I don’t want that. The point of moving was to get away from all the leftover bullshit that hangs in our town. And all the other extra problems or drama. I texted him on Monday about playing tennis (something we had talked about Sunday) and then I was like, “Can you do wednesday 11am-1pm?” and he was like I’m not sure I’ll check. So Tuesday night rolls around and I text him, “I’ll take that as a no”. And he had the balls to text back “Hm, not necessarily” at like 12am. Unreal like how rude. What the hell? So at around 2pm today, I messaged him asking if he could swing by and that I wanted to talk, saying I would make it quick. He got back to me short and sweet- “hey sorry was working what’s up?”. To which I replied, “I figured. Not much. I’d like to talk to you in person at some point when we are both preferably sober and it isn’t 1am. As I said I’ll make it quick”.
For those of you wondering, here’s what I want to say:
“Hey this has been fun and all but when I’m down in Miami, and you’re down there, I don’t want to be your Saturday night girl who you only hit up between the hours of 2am and 6am. I have so much more to offer and want to be so much more to someone else I’m involved with and I just worry we aren’t on the same page. The only time we ever see each other is between 2am and 6am on Sunday morning and I’m starting to feel like a wet rag...wring it out, use it again, wring it out, use it again, etc. and its a really shitty feeling. I’m not asking you to be in a relationship with me, but if you care and want to keep doing this, I’m down but i want to actually spend time with you. And if all you want is a saturday night girl, you should probably find a new girl”.
Harsh? Maybe. But I’m feeling like shit also don’t forget. And it sucks even worse for me because I really like him and I think he only kind of likes me. And that just blows. The real question is if he will even get back to me. I’m worried he won’t have the balls to, which only makes me want to ditch him even more. We all knew this was going to happen eventually. My friend George thinks that Ollie and I will figure it out. He seems to be in a healthy positive mindset about the whole thing. Meanwhile, I’m freaking because I’m worried I’m going to loose this guy. Crap who even knows what will happen....Stay tuned my lovely followers. I’ll make sure to provide a play-by-play when I get the chance.
xxR
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Weekend in Prague
Hey again, it has been a while hasn’t it? (Got to stop starting my blogs like that). Anyway I have been up to many adventures during my absence, doing stuff like: firing guns, looking at strippers, getting drunk, neglecting my duties as an adult and the activity I’m most well-known for…..gaming! Fuck off I know what you was thinking you dirty little sket get your mind out of the gutter. Seriously though I went on a stag do with my brother as you know he’s about to get married. We went to a lovely little place named Prague, had loads of history in the city and erm….loads of night clubs with women dancing naked in them. Here is what I experienced by only spending a weekend in such a place.
RIGHT, first thing. I was fucking waved on the plane. Yep 9am in Gatwick airport and 14 guys turn up to the Weatherspoon’s to have a few pints, now call me a lightweight I don’t care but seriously when you have had nothing to eat for the last 24 hours, a few pints of beer hits you like a rock bottom. Not ooooooooooonly did we drink there, we were drinking on the plane like we were about to shoot a music video on easy jet. I had 2 bloody Heinekens and a bit of Bacardi (gotta sneak that off duty stuff on. You know how it goes). Flight was madness, simply put. I, my brother and my cousin were all rapping to mask off by future, to the disdain of the other passengers but hey I payed for my ticket and we are giving you a free performance, be grateful. Not only that we brought a superimposed cut out of my brothers’ face on to the plane just in case you know, everyone forgot who he was. We weren’t the only people going to a stag do in Prague though, seemed like everyone had that idea down and good god did they put ours to shame. One group came in pink shirts, they all had this selfie of a man and a woman with the caption “we know what you’re thinking; we can’t believe he pulled her too”. That is a group chat level roast and here was us rocking our own clothes and some inebriated banter as a counter.
So when we got off the plan I was still tipsy carrying my luggage, walking into random people and saying sorry to inanimate and non-sentient objects because shit, I don’t want them snaking me to airport security do I? Anyway a top lad named Steve who was with us on the stag do decided to swipe my cousins passport while he went to toilet on the plane, this caused……a rather hilarious outcome.
Cousin: FAM where is my passport?!
Me: *trying not to giggle* I swear you had it when you boarded
Steve: *looking at me* yeah he did, I saw him put it in his pocket.
Cousin: FUCK SAKE MAN I left it in the suitcase and we can’t even claim that past here!
Me: you’re stuck in Prague mate. I heard the men like a bit of chocolate in their diet.
Cousin: WHAT?! Ah man I fully messed up.
We could have kept this going, honestly we really wanted to but the guy who was checking our passports at the little gate looked like he was one step away from saying “fuck it” and shooting up the lobby. So we handed my cousin his passport, I got punched in the arm causing it to go dead (even though I wasn’t the one who pranked him…..wanker) and we all skipped off into an uber and in to the city.
So we’re in the uber now and we’re still drinking. I think it was dark rum I was having cause when we got out the cab I legit felt like I was walking on a cruise ship. Here is where it gets long, we go to the main lobby and we are all drunk. We had to then speak to the manager who (unsurprisingly) spoke very little English, tell him what rooms we wanted and where we wanted them and pray to god no one was occupying them. We were stuck in this little situation for a good hour trying to figure out what boss man was saying while he was trying to figure out what we were saying. We then had to fill out forms declaring that we would have our asses out of the place by 11am on Sunday. After all of that we just dropped off our shit into our rooms and then headed out to see what the city was like. Easy right? WRONG. 14 pissheads in a city they don’t know? It was like watching the chuckle brothers abroad. We didn’t know where the city centre was so we kinda just wondered in a big group, hoping to see something that resembled a restaurant. These times I had to break the seal and because I didn’t know where the toilets were in this damn place do you know what I did? To save me pissing all this alcohol out on my jeans I clutched my damn piece and BOOOOOOOOTED to my nearest alley way, my first few hours in Prague and I was holding my dick running around the place, smooth Phil smooth.
So when we headed back to the hotel after grabbing something to eat we thought “hey wouldn’t it be a great idea to rob my brothers clothes?” my brother obviously being the stag it was just right we pranked the shit out of him. So that’s what we did. When he was showering, someone snuck into his room and robbed everything. He only had the outfit he went to the airport in basically, He wasn’t happy. Not one bit. Just went full sniffer dog and searched every nook and cranny for his stuff. It didn’t last long because he could even find Madeline McCann if he was angry enough, anyway night time came, pre drinks came, cab came and then we hit the city properly…..or so we thought. See we ended up in 3 different caps, that’s ok. What is NOT ok is the fact we ended up in 3 different parts of the bloody city even though we all said “take us to old town” so I’ll tell you where I ended up. I actually ended up pretty close to old town to be perfectly honest, our uber driver dropped us outside a strip club though, and straight up there was a woman dancing at the door in a skirt shorter than my dads temper after arsenal losing on match day. So after that brief encounter we met up with everyone and ended up in a club named M1. You can just tell British people were going to be in here, it’s named after a motorway for fuck sake. Needless to say the club was on point. Music? They dropped humble by Kendrick Lamar and a bit of giggs for good measure, when then happened the inner road man was unleashed in us all. It was a tad intimidating for other people seeing 14 guys go “HOL UP BITCH SIT DOWN, BE HUMBLE” over and over again while flinging out gun signs with our fingers cause you know…..gotta keep it south London. Now after that we all kinda wondered around for a bit, was about 1am and you know what? We ended up in a strip club.
Holy hell them places are crazy; these women do not skip a day at gym. They were climbing poles and just chilling at the top with a glass of wine. They were inserting some diabolical shit into each other…..no seriously….. Some of the dildos they had were possessed, that stuff was just drilling away and the women were just like “its calm fam, I do this on the reg”. Now I got approached by one as she offered me a lap dance, also she told me to stop snapchatting the footage because you sorta can’t do that…..ok who am I kidding she came to me to tell me to stop snapchatting. She did EVENTUALLY offer a lap dance, I politely declined cause I’m poor in another country and I’m also a gentleman (yep….a gentleman). See now the thing is she put her arm around me and cause I’m 5’2 and she was like 6ft in heels her boob was basically hugging my face. My words were muffled when I tried to talk to her and the whole encounter got awkward after 5 minutes, so much for my first time in a strip club ey?
Right this is really lengthy so I’ll cut it here for now but part 2 will be coming soon! I’ll also continue my Rutlish stories later down the line. Until next time ciao!
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Dear Crashpad Diary #32
Yoooooo freakin beasts!!
What´s going on back home?? New sends??? Great fun?? Sweet life?? All the options right!!! =)
We´ve been running around and trying to hug the universe more and more down here hehehe
The trip has been fantastic and the good vibes ensure to make it happen the best way ever hehehe
with some funny facts that I´m about to tell yas… I mean… write yas!! haha Like: The crazy 4000 islands in a river / People of Laos / Storms everywhere / if only the storms alerts worked / Dumb and Dumber´s Loop / Loop fail / Restos with no food?? / try not to pay the waterfalls / the gay waterfall / Vang Vieng smelly cat / are we in China??? / Fast and furious / Sleeping at the laundry
haha … =) can’t start the post without a smile and laughs upfront heheheheheheh
Twas nice spending my bday at Phnom Penh… nothing too exciting there indeed… big city and not interesting… but… the party was awesome… we destroyed some ice-cream to commemorate life hahahaha and get some serious sugar rush hehehehe
The day after we got a bus to Laos… went up towards the border following the mekong river… that goes from Cambodia to Thailand, crossing pretty much entirely Laos… and we decided give a shot to a place called 4000 islands… in the middle of the river there are thousands of small, medium and big islands… one prettier than the other… what a place!! We spend few days at one of them called Dondet… a small one with loads of hut and bungalows… a hippie atmosphere and rich nature… It was Laos welcoming us greatly!!
Already in the first days we realised how different are the people from Laos… it seems they don’t give a shit about you… I mean… they care and treat you well… but different than Indians, Cambodians, Indonesians… they are not curious… they dont bother you asking “where you go?”, “Yes… weed??” hahahah Also… the english is barely spoken in many areas… which brings a whole new experience to the adventure! haha
Donder is quite popular among travellers and it´ll be easy communicating… fairly good internet too… the only problem is… don´t trust the weather forecast hahaha we were there in the middle of a huge… serious… fantastically intense storm… well… you have to consider that tropical rains are pretty common here… but there we were… walking fast under pissing rain… lightening going on pretty much everywhere… loads of thunders… trying to get to a safe place asap… my good old head torch helping us finding the way… so we got to our “muddy street”… “sweet… we will make it without being electrocuted!!” Just after few almost-jogging-steps, the mud took away my flip flops… I stopped and got it back.. running from guesthouse to guesthouse till getting to our place… what a sketchy adventure… =) As soon as we close the door, Luh´s phone connects to the internet and he receives the following message from Accuweather: Alert! Heavy storm in your area!!
Well… thanks!! hahahaha
From Dondet… and pretty energetic after the storm (haha I had to make the joke… sorry!)… we followed th plan of covering Laos from south to north… and the next stop was Paksé! The city is small and there is not much as well.. but what grabs one attention here is the trip you can do around the area… the called Bolaven Loop… which consists in renting a shitty bike and drive through the waterfally roads.. passing by coffee plantations (what a tasty coffee beasts!!), greeny scenery… hills… mountains… dirty roads… almost untouched communities and bridges above rivers. so glad we did it… twas great!! Hats down to Tad Lo… a small town with many waterfalls, great food, awesome people and fantastic atmosphere! =)
The whole thing was so funny!! Imagine that… 200km and we rented a bike for the both of us… an 100cc… it was defo like the Dumb and Dumber version of the Bolaven Loop! hahahaha
But even dumber was a guy that became a legend in the backpackers mythology! It´s all well set… When you rent the bike you get like a prep talk… explaining where you can go and all the tips… the start is in Pakse and the first day is pretty easy… you drive straight… for good 10k and then turn left… going north until you get to Tad Lo… easy right??
Well… not for a guy that for some reason turned right just after the city and drove all the way down to the 4000 islands…. hahahahah even more awkward was the fact that the guy drove like 4 hours until he gets to Dondet and realises that was sth wrong… haha where are the waterfalls?? Someone replaced´em with tons of islands! hahahahahah people are indeed awesome!! hahaha
Everyone has troubles when tripping like that… some go wrong… some get loads of flat tires… loads fall… have the bikes stolen… but we were fortunately good till the very last day… when the universe decided mess up with our food!! we don’t know why none of the restaurants in the last day´s piece, did not have any food… hahahaha serious?? A restaurant without food??? haha we prob went down some pounds that trip… the tiny bike appreciate the restos effort hehehehehe
After those days paying for the waterfalls entrance and parking pretty often, we got kinda cranky with that and decided not to pay anymore… going for only the ones for free… which so far were the nicest ones up there near to Tad Lo… so… the last stop was in a cascade called Tad Yuang.. getting to the gate the girl came with the tickets already… we decided not to pay once again and she got angry at us because we stopped and did not get the tickets she had already taken off… hahaha that was funny!! But the best was just after she started complaining in her language… Luh accelerate towards the waterfall pretending we would get in without paying… when we took off she started screaming and only stopped, quite ashamed, when she realized he was messing with her and got in to turn the bike and go away! hahahah
Another hilarious moment provided by the waterfalls was in Tad Hang… a nice place to hang with friends.. enjoy the small cascades and a big volume of water coming from everywhere… perfect spot to grab a beer and relax… exactly what the locals do! So there we were, getting there through the stairs when I see a weird woman coming towards us as a missile, passed by me and went straight to Luh saying hi and snuggling his arms hahahahah The lady boy locked the target as soon as he/she saw Luh and came attacking in full speed hahahahah twas so funny… Awkward moment hahahaha
With the loop done we got back to Pakse, spent the hottest day ever there… 38ºC with 50ºC real feeling… is it the real feeling of drying off?? hahaha And the day after we took off to Vang Vieng… passing by Vientiane… the days in Vang Vieng were sweet… such a beautiful place full of blue lagoons, caves, beautiful mountains and the Mekong river cutting it in half!
We met the smelliest girl in Laos… she happened to stay in our room and destroyed the atmosphere in it… I know… sometimes travelling you get a bit smelly… but when that happens… you simply take a shower and wash your clothes… and sadly, for the three of us in that room, she did not learn that yet! hahahah I´m laughing but I cried when I opened the door that day… the air was even greener inside the room! hahahahahah Oh well… I used my earplugs as a nose plugs and twas a lovely night!! hahahaha
Vang Vieng is widely known because of the party scene and the famous tubing through the Mekong river´s rapids… which we did and…. man… was the most boring thing ever… there is no rapids… only 2 parts with a maybe 2 mins in total… for the rest of the time you have to paddle and burn in the sun like a doughnuts baking in an oven hahahahahaha was terrible! The only worth thing was a zipline in the very last bar… but other than that…. a big nope!
Anyways…it has been done in the past with people stopping in bars situated along side the river (they were closed because of the accidents and even worse… after some deaths)… nowadays there are only few bars…. which made me think… maybe it has always been boring… but when youre drunk everything gets funnier and people indeed enjoyed that!
Well… I would need loads of alcohol in my bloodstream to get some adrenaline off that boredom!! hahahaha
But the universe worked in our favour that night…and gave us part of the adrenaline we missed from the “doughnuting”! When traveling from Vang Vieng to Luang Prabang… we took the first and only fast and furious bus… but, unfortunately, it wasn’t´t fast and all the neon and lights were inside it… and being a sleeping bus… that did not help at all with our sleep hahahahahah
In addition… we could not believe when they, around 1am, woke everyone up and asked to leave the bus… twas in the middle of nowhere… extremely misty or dusty (couldn’t quite understand)… they needed to get the bus lighter in order to get it uphill through that dirty road… ahahahaha something that only happens in Laos hahahahha
We got to Luang Prabang wrecked… at 4 am…. and the world is so cool and full of good vibes that we arrived to the hostel… asked if they had any place that we could crash and they gave us a bed in their laundry as they did not have any rooms available hahaha we got a really god “morning” of sleep among duvets… bedsheets and pillow hahahaha twas great and smelled fucking good!! hahahah in your face smelly girl from Vang Vieng!! hahahaha
And here we are right now… the probable last stop in Laos before getting to our beloved Thailand… enjoying the good food… the chill atmosphere and laid back way of Laotian life!
Hope you guys had some fun with the post and sorry for the lack of updates lately… I´m not writing often but I´m sending fantastic vibes towards each one of yas! =)
Oh… and after 4 months without climbing, I´m only one month away from my trains and the sweet seshs with the beasts back home!! can’t wait!
Great vibes and huge smiles from Laos!!
Cheers,
Evan
#crashpaddiaries#sawproject#backpacking#trip#roadtrip#livingontheroad#mountains#outdoors#brotrip#biketrip#laos#southeastasia#happiness#smile#goodvibes#4000islands#dondet#bolavenloop#coffee#laocoffee#bolavenplateau#dumb and dumber#fast and furious#bustrip#storms#lifestyle#rainstorm#e-supertramp_on_flickr#climbingiscoming#pakse
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