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#(I wish there were a 3-day duration choice)
capricorn-0mnikorn · 5 months
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I heard a line in a song today, and now, I'm just curious:
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marvelsmylife · 5 months
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Second Choice part 3
Pairing: Azriel x reader
Plot: After confirming your pregnancy you come face to face with your mate to break the news.
A/n I apologize in advance. Things are going to get sticky in the next part. Expect a lot of jealousy and feeling insecure.
Second Choice Masterlist
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Two weeks have passed since you visited the spring court, and since you got confirmation that you were indeed pregnant. You were in denial at first, but as soon as Madja took your hands into hers and repeated that you were pregnant, you started to cry.
“If you are worried about giving birth, you do not need to worry anymore,” Madja tried to reassure you that you were going to be ok. That Nesta actually changed your anatomy along with hers and Feyre's after Feyre’s first pregnancy so you would have a safe birth.
“It’s not that,” you replied, “I’m so furious with Azriel right now. The last thing I want right now is to have his baby, but I also can’t bring myself to terminate this pregnancy.”
Madja gave you a sympathetic smile before standing up and hugging you, “It's going to be ok, and don’t worry, I won’t say a word to your mate, but I do suggest you talk to someone about this. If you do not wish to keep the child, maybe you could give it up for adoption. I know a few couples who would love a child.”
You pondered Madja’s offer for several days before realizing you couldn’t give up your child. Yes, it bothered you that Azriel was the father, but at the same time, you couldn’t give the baby up because you’ll always have the guilt of giving them up. Because of that, you decided to move back to your old home in Day Court for the duration of your pregnancy.
After discussing the situation with Rhysand and Feyre, they agreed to let you move for the duration. “You know you have to tell him before you leave tomorrow,” Rhysand reminded you again that you still have to tell Azriel you were pregnant with his child and that you were moving, “You might still be mad at him, but he’s your mate and the father of your child.”
“I know,” you replied, “I just know he’s going to lose it when he finds out and do everything in his power to stop the move,” and you were right.
You called Azriel to the cabin the following day after all of your belongings were taken to the day court. You didn’t know how to break the news to Azriel, so you just blurted it out. Azriel felt his throat become dry at your words, “You’re pregnant?”
“Yes,” you replied while rubbing your tiny baby bump.
Azriel rushed to you and dropped to his knees, “I’m going to be a dad. We’re going to be a family.” Azriel placed a kiss on your stomach and tried to wrap his arms around your body, but you had to back away before he had the chance.
“Just because we’re having a baby together doesn’t mean I’m moving back. In fact, I’ve decided to go home to the day court for the duration of my pregnancy. I need to be with family and-“
“You can’t go. As your mate, I’m prohibiting you from going,” Azriel responded, “I’m the child's father, and I want to be by your side the entire time.”
At that moment, Rhysand decided to step in and intervene before things got worse, “Actually, she has every right to do this. I’ve already talked with Helion, and he’s offered her a room for her at his palace. He said that because you are the father, you are welcome to visit, but he will ban you if you cross any boundaries or make y/n uncomfortable.”
Azriel felt like his world was crumbling around him as he realized you were leaving him. “Please don’t do this y/n. Please don’t leave me,” Azriel begged.
“I’m sorry, but I have to do this. Don’t make it harder than it already is,” you responded firmly.
Your words cut Azriel deep, “Let me kiss you one last time. Please,” Azriel begged again.
You looked over at Rhysand, who gave you a knowing look. “Ok,” you whispered before you felt Azriel’s lips against yours. There was nothing but passion in the kiss you shared, and made you almost change your mind about your decision to move. Almost.
“Goodbye Azriel,” you kissed Azriel’s hands before you walked away with Rhysand.
The second you arrived at the day court, Helion embraced you, “It’s so good to have you back home y/n. We’ve missed you here.”
“I missed you guys too,” you smiled at Helion before you looked over at Rhysand who was picking a piece of lint from his jacket, “Are you going to stay awhile or-"
“No,” Rhysand replied, “I have to head back, but please enjoy yourself while you're here. But do let us know if you need anything.”
You were about to thank him for everything he had done for you when Helion interrupted, “Come now. I will have my staff set up a nursery for your child. In the meantime, I’ll show you to your room,” Helion kissed your forehead before putting his arm around you and taking you to your new room.
Rhysand didn’t miss how possessively Helion was holding onto you and wondered if you staying at the day court was a mistake.
@lilah-asteria @lees-chaotic-brain @sleepylunarwolf @iluvyewman-blog
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dgrailwar · 5 months
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Round 6, Day 3 - Team Avenger
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The hound collapsed, one final head raising as it whimpered and growled-- helpless as the Count served the final blow. Without words, the Avenger continued onward, stepping deeper and deeper within the confines of the cavern.
He stopped, staring into the massive chamber at the end of the dark stone passageway, pointing at a massive figure laying at rest.
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"A tomb. The hound guarded a tomb… this is what it held so dearly and wished to protect. Avenger or no, we all fight within the bounds of love and hatred. That hound fought for the sake of 'love'."
He noted, staring at the dragon. It was massive, a grand beast who's gargantuan frame took up almost every ounce of space. A low rumble filled the chamber, an earthen tremor that you quickly recognized as the beast breathing. Faint, shallow, yet breathing. Alive, in the barest sense. It's slumber deep and intense.
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"An Extra-Class. The dragon himself is one as well. That is what the Temptress warned us of… and if we were to awake him, things would truly turn for the worse. I have no opinions-- he doesn't stand in the way of my revenge, nor my path to the Grail. Besides, I doubt we could rouse it from its slumber."
Due to your Defensive Play choices, you gain a +1% bonus to Free-for-All's (not triggered by 'Playing Defensively') next round!
Servant Skills:
Determination of Steel (EX Rank): If Avenger is about to take a fatal wound, if there's at least a 3% difference in their score and the victor above him, he may avoid damage. When facing a single-target (1-on-1), he will gain a +3% boost.
Monte Cristo Mythologie: The King of the Cavern (C Rank): When battling enemies, his flames are like a poison. He reduces demerits against him by 3%, and when he is victorious against another, he inflicts a -2% demerit for their next round. This demerit increases by 2% by every 10% difference in scores.
Wisdom of Predicament (A Rank): When engaged in a Free-for-All, gain a +3% boost. Additionally, if Avenger earns last place, both the victor and the 2nd place Servant gain a -2% demerit, rather than simply the 2nd place Servant.
NOBLE PHANTASM: Enfer Château d'If (A Rank)
A high-speed Noble Phantasm that inflicts 2 ‘wounds’ rather than 1. If this Noble Phantasm is triggered during a one-on-one battle, then he gains a +20% boost. If it is triggered in a Free-for-All, the boost increases to +30%. Demerits lose any and all effectiveness against him for the duration of the round.
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Class-Traits:
AVENGER-CLASS Servants are vengeful by nature. The first time they are defeated by a Servant, they gain an automatic +2% bonus against that specific Servant, without needing to study them (but can in order to increase the bonus). They gain a permanent +3% bonus per wound they attain that will remain if the wound remains, but will disappear if the wound is healed.
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bricommissions · 1 year
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I couldn't check if you were doing this still, or how early the post was for the commission for the ask starter. Though I'm shooting a shot haha! Do ignore if you're not doing it ✨️
Preferred Name: Nyx
Age: 20 (Turning 21 this year whoop!)
Pronouns: She/They
Personality: I don't show too many emotions really. Most of the time I bounce off of other people's emotions/energy. What they give I give back. Otherwise I'm pretty laid-back and nonchalant. I also keep everything to myself, unless I choose to tell something. I might drop hints at wanting to, but I will not outright say what secret I want to tell about myself. I don't mind making new acquaintances or friends. I'm just super shy about it and anxiety ridden haha! I'd rather someone talk to me first. I don't open up easily and it takes time for me to actually trust someone with personal details about me. My friends say I'm the therapist and the mom of the group. I look out for other people more than I look out for myself. I'm empathetic and sort of a day dreamer. I may or may not also like to give random trinkets to people I care about as a symbol of trust
That's about it! I know Genshin Impact more than Emsamble Stars, so I'd like to see who my possible match could be from Genshin Impact.
I hope you have a great day/evening/night and a fabulous time in getting writing commissions! Wish you the best of luck!
hello & happy early 21st birthday to you, nyx !! i hope your special day is super awesome when it happens <3 thank you for the good luck wishes :D
DRUM ROLL, PLEASE . . .
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
i'd ship you with : KAEYA ALBERICH !!
as soon as i read that you tend to keep to yourself & have a hard time opening up most of the time, i knew kaeya would be the man to want to genuinely understand all of you. he would try to get a read on you on numerous occassions. you capture his curiousity.
let's say you were in mondstadt for personal reasons that are entirely up to you. maybe you swing by the tavern to get to know some of the locals, but you don't go inside since you cannot legally drink just yet. kaeya would instantly notice the new face seated outside of the tavern chatting with passersbys.
he'd sit across from you in an empty seat with a polite "may i?" & instantly introduce himself. he catches the vibe of your somewhat secretiveness right away. he's pretty secretive himself. he'd make sure to remain friendly & talk in his low, soothing voice in case you're feeling anxious. a new city can be quite overwhelming, after all. he'd ask if you're settling in well & you both would hit it off pretty quickly. he forgets all about going inside of the tavern for an after work drink. he's far more interested in you.
every time you throw out a hint, he takes the bait. kaeya admits that you're the most interesting person he's spoken to all week. says that luck must be on his side for him to cross paths with you. the air between you is filled with warm laughter. he respects that you don't open up very easily since he is the same way. he doesn't pressure you.
once every single star is out in that night sky, kaeya walks you to your hotel room & bids you farewell. he's already excited to cross paths with you again. the cavalry captain hasn't felt excitement like this in far too long. for the duration of your trip, he makes an effort to cross paths with you & make sure you're doing alright. he is a gentleman, after all.
even though your time in mondstadt is not permanent, you see each other almost every day. when the time comes for you to leave, you take one of kaeya's hands & place a trinket of your choice into his hand with a promise to write. he keeps his hold on your hand as he gives you a deep bow of respect, letting you know that he greatly anticipates the day he receives the first letter. should you be alright with it, he even places a featherlight yet romantic kiss to the back of your hand.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
THANK YOU FOR READING !!
if you are unsatisfied with the results, feel free to shoot me an ask or im !!
if you'd like to receive one of these yourself, they are still open at the moment. please refer to THIS POST if you're interested. they just come out a bit slowly since they're lengthy.
if you liked my writing, please consider commissioning me !! it is my only source of income at the moment. i offering writing commissions such as custom character x reader fics, comfort character emails, ship fics, & more <3
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
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cachemypov · 1 month
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21/8/24
Day 3 / 5 gym today, kinda get the hang out of the exercise routine that I would do daily. still adding 1 or 2 new ones in for fun. Learnt Skull Crushers with DB today. It wasn't as bad as what I did previously with ez bar, but I guess its because the weight was way too heavy for me if I were to use ez bar instead. I start slow and gets the hang of it, hopefully I can increase the weight next week :D
Work was pretty tiring today though we didn't see a lot of clients. But I guess the duration with each person was longer than expected therefore it's pretty taxing. We tried out the new PPE today, it was bad. It traps body heat and I was sweating inside and my bra were soaking wet. I could feel my sweat drips on my chest and back - it stinks too. Luckily I bought cooling wet wipes along (wish I could bring a spare bra too) today and manage to freshen myself up with it and my deodorant. if not, I would stink max.
I'm still having trouble to bulk up my protein amount without using shakes or powder. But It's so difficult. and its harder when I have to cut down my carbs too. like hell nah, it I can't get carbs during lunch, I might die of unhappiness.
Still figuring out this shit, and its tough.
Was pretty obsessed with the videos on people playing BathHouse. It looks fun yet scary (i'm too ball-less to play it alone). Stopped the video while eating dinner outside because I was going to use the public toilet and there were many scene whereby the ghost appears on the mirror while the role is showering infront of the mirror. I think I will not dare to use a bathhouse after this game lol
Quickly skipped to some random tarot reading videos to distract myself before using the public toilet just now. and they were talking about my 正缘. love this kind of video, because it gives me hope saying that one day i might meet someone out there who are actually for me (haha, who's that clown out there).
Though we all know that this whole "正缘" thing is not real (they only have 3 cards choice), but its quite interesting. they said that I (the card I choose) will found someone who is either same age or younger than me. someone who has like many friends and have a business mind. someone that I have already met when we were younger or this person already heard about me but I have not met him in person yet. Someone who is low key romantic etc, but act of service with meticulous details. hahahahah I cannot stop thinking it was my ex, but then again I do not tend to go for 回头草. so probably, nope. but I am really curious and looking forward if there is such person out there.
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paganwitchisis · 4 months
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"The Unexpected Adventure" Chapter 3
Chapter 3: Surprise!  
Word Count: 5,419
Rated: Explicit
RATED 18 PLUS!!!
Warnings: Smut, Smut and fluff, body swap, brief snippet of violence (fight), unknown pregnacy, protective and soft Astarion, blood (drinking)
Chapter two - here!
This is Chapter 3
Chapter four - here
AO3 link is here!
There is smut in this chapter!
Note: I apologize for the delay. My health came up with some complications which delayed this chapter
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Tav was joking, but she could tell that Astarion contemplated the idea.
“I would say yes, but you need to eat. A little of my blood isn’t enough, my dear, so you’re going to have to hunt. I’ll help...no worries, because I will be with you.” Astarion added the last part after seeing Tav’s reluctance and fear to hunt cross her face.
“But I can’t be quiet to save my life.”
“I can teach you.” Astarion replied, but Tav merely laughed.
“You’re better off trying to teach Mol not to steal. I hang back on stealth missions for a reason. Until you clear them, I am a liability. I don’t want you hurt.”
Astarion brought his hand up to Tav’s face and kissed her. “You won’t hurt me. I promise. Just give it a try.”
Tav hesitantly nodded and began getting dressed after helping Astarion clean up from their escapades. Tav and Astarion got ready, still kissing and giving occasional touches as they did so. Astarion, in the end, needed help with the clasps of her armor, and so Tav strapped it on while Astarion helped Tav figure out which dagger went where. Both may be proficient with taking armor off, but were woefully unprepared when it came to putting it on.
Eventually, the couple left their room, and headed outside to find that night had already fallen on Baldur’s Gate. Under the suggestion of Astarion, Tav made her way to Rivington and was amazed by the range of vision she had in the dark. Tav never had Darkvision the way Astarion did, and so she was surprised when she left the Elfsong that she was able to navigate to Rivington as if it was the day itself. Astarion, on the other hand, cursed himself. Astarion wasn’t used to the opposite effect that he had and relied on Tav heavily to make his way out of the city. Thankfully, the city had lights on many of the streets but not all streets had that feature. This made things complicated and made Astarion wonder ‘what else would be different’?
The trade-off was fair, Astarion mused, as he now had a beating heart and natural body heat. He no longer starved constantly, and he could enjoy real food for the first time in over two centuries. Of course, when Astarion brought up how remorseful he was that Tav would be suffering, Tav listened to him and acknowledged that although it was a change, she was happy to do it. It wasn’t like she had a choice in who the book targeted, but she was happy it was her, as she would do anything for the man she loved. Just to give him a brief respite, something Tav wished she could do any time, but for the duration of the spell the book had cast, Tav would grin and bear the consequences. She was happy to give him a small measure of happiness.
What Tav wasn’t fully aware about was that she was the source of his happiness, not some spell or a beating heart, although those were nice. The woman who opened her heart for a vampire and treated him like a person, an equal, made all the difference to the man. She dealt with his bad days and celebrated his good days, she listened, she cared, and she loved him unashamed. On the contrary, she was proud of him!
Without realizing it, Tav, holding Astarion’s hand, had crossed the boundary into Rivington and headed towards the woods.
“Darling, since it is your first hunt, it may be best to focus on smaller prey. Bunnies and squirrels, for instance. They’re still slippery creatures, so you’ll have to keep your cool and focus on where they will be, not where they are.”
“This may be my first time as a vampire, Star, but this isn’t my first time hunting.”
“Whatever you say, my love. Keep in mind that in the worst case scenario, I am here.”
“And how would you help? You can’t lift my sword and I have your daggers?” Tav inquired curiously.
“If the dark vision and my dexterity are anything to go with, I should be proficient with your sword and you with my daggers.” Astarion theorized as they trekked deeper and deeper into the forest. Astarion stopped Tav, let go of her hand, and began instructing Tav how best to walk without alerting others. It took some time but Tav eventually got part of it down, and for small prey, Astarion was content to let her do her thing.
“I’ll wait here, but if you find something you cannot fight, run. I mean it, dear, I don’t want you playing hero.” Astarion kissed Tav briefly and watched as best he could as Tav stalked off into the forest.
After about twenty minutes, Astarion was sitting on a log when he heard the crunch of a twig and the rustle of leaves.
“Back already? Find anything good?” Astarion asked out to the darkness and grew a little concerned when his questions were met with silence. One moment passed, then two, before Astarion heard the tell-tale sound of a bear growl.
“I’m guessing you’re not Halsin…”
Meanwhile, Tav had also heard this growl as she had gotten herself lost shortly after leaving her lover. Turning her head, Tav not only was surprised that she could smell and tell the beast was a bear, but that she could also hear the thud of a heartbeat not far from the creature’s space. Tav didn’t have to be told who that was and if they were in danger. She somehow knew. Tav sprinted back, not caring if she made any noise, and was also surprised that she, in a fit of panic, made little to no noise. It was like instinct was taking over.
By the time she got there, she could smell blood, her blood (or in this case, her lover’s). Following the smell, Tav found Astarion holding his shoulder and the grizzly bear, a mammoth of a specimen, cornering him. Astarion’s sword was laying a few yards to the side in what looked like an attempt to defend himself. Tav wasn't sure what took over her but she followed that instinctual spell she was under and leapt on the back of the grizzly bear who was turned away from her.
She wasn’t sure where her next moves came from, but she grabbed the bear’s head, yanked it by the fur to expose its neck and sunk her teeth in deep. The fur tickled her nose, but she was unconcerned by this. Instead, she focused on locking her legs around the bear the best she could and drinking the hot liquid that gushed to the back of her throat. The bear tried to thrash and buck her off, Astarion all but forgotten during this interaction. Tav held tight and kept drinking until the bear fell forward, dead.
Astarion watched in awe as everything occurred. Once Tav finished with the bear, she pulled back and wiped her mouth of the copious amount of blood soaking her clothing and face.
“Damn, you look hot. Want to go back to the tavern and go again?” Astarion was mostly joking, but would be lying if he didn’t feel a need and a want for the woman who just saved his life. She not only saved it, she was covered in the bear’s blood, and this turned Astarion on more than he admitted.
“We should bring him back to the tavern. Maybe Gale can make some kind of stew from him.” Tav replied, choosing not to answer Astarion’s suggestion. Tav took a step towards Astarion and tossed him a healing potion before she couldn’t contain herself and tried to drink from her lover once again. Astarion drank the potion and grabbed his sword off the ground before Tav took his hand and began trying to drag the bear out. Astarion stopped her first.
“You hunted before, right? We’re better off cutting the meat here. It isn’t as messy that way, and a hell of a lot lighter.”
Tav sighed and acknowledged he was right before they got to work.
“I never said I cleaned it, just gave the killing blow.” Tav admitted. About half an hour later, Tav now knew how to skin, clean and cut the bear meat thanks to Astarion who surprisingly knew how. When asked about it, Astarion said he was tasked to hunt occasionally by Cazador. He wasnt allowed the blood but the kitchens would ask for gamy meat. This left Astarion and his siblings with the task of hunting a different kind of mark. Usually these requests were at the behest of a noble or someone Cazador wished to curry favor but this helped teach a few valuable lessons to Astarion he could pass on.  
The next morning, the pair laid in bed sore and sated from a night of debauchery. It started with a bath and cleaning their armor but quickly devolved into something more when Astarion couldn’t keep his hands to himself. Tav and Astarion started out kissing and deeply taking each other until their lips were bruised before the pair ended up not getting rest at all. The room smelled heavily of sex and sweat, their clothes strewn to the floor. Astarion laid there snoring softly while Tav remained awake. Her new four hour trance cycle kept her up so she read and cuddled with her significant other.
That was until a soft knock came at the door.
Tav pulled away and offered Astarion her pillow to compensate for her leaving the bed. Surprisingly, it worked. In the past, Astarion would have woken up right away if he felt her leave, but then again, they both were fairly vigorous the prior night. Tav quickly and as quietly as possible got dressed in the right clothes. She almost attempted to put on her usual clothing before she remembered that she was borrowing Astarion’s body. Tav was able to open the door and slip out into the hallway only to run into Gale.
“Oh, hello, Astarion. I mean Tav.” Gale quickly corrected himself. “Smells like you and Astarion were...um...lively. That explains why you both bailed on us yesterday”
“Yeah, sorry about that. We were...experimenting with a few theories”
“You both have huh? Any solid leads?” Gale joked and smiled at Tav which was an odd sight considering Gale and Astarion (or rather Tav in Astarion’s body) rarely were so friendly.
 “All were a bust. We may have to go back to square one.” Tav chuckled and smiled back.
“Well, good thing for you, I found a reversal. One that will fix the issue tomorrow night, assuming we can get the right items today. You see, the person who has the book, I need may part with it because of our situation, but he isn’t known to be altruistic. He always has a price. Always. I plan to have contingencies in case his demands are…unreasonable. I was wondering if you both wanted to come with? You weren’t able to come with us yesterday, which led us to this lead, so I figured I’d offer you both the chance.” Gale sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck after his explanation while Tav shook her head.
“I’d consider it, except Astarion is still sleeping. I really am sorry we never got back to you yesterday. Everything was just so new, so different.”
“Hey, no need to explain that to me! I’ll follow up with a few of the others, you two have fun experimenting.” Gale smirked and left before Tav could say anything further.
Tav entered the room and got back into bed, accidentally waking Astarion who stretched when she attempted to sneak back into bed. Astarion propped one eye open and gave a rakish smile.
“How is my goddess?”
“Goddess? That’s a new one.” Tav kissed Astarion briefly on his forehead, her lover almost purred from the attention.
“The commonfolk should bow to you.” Astarion chuckled. “When I prayed to every deity, only the mindflayers plucked me from Cazador. Only you, however, saved me from him permanently. You’re a goddamn goddess.” Astarion leaned slightly so he could prop himself up on his arm and kissed Tav briefly.
“I am so grateful to have met you too. I don’t think I’m a goddess, but I feel honored regardless.” Tav said as she kissed him once again, her left hand on Astarion’s cheek and her right arm held herself up. “Oh! I almost forgot, Gale dropped by.”
“What did the wizard want?” Astarion asked, flopping himself back on the bed. Astarion didn’t hide himself as he lightly fondled his breasts. “Damn, are your breasts so sensitive.”
“That’s weird. Maybe my cycle is coming up.” Tav thought over the reasons. “Gale was here because he had a follow-up to their lead. We might be put into our appropriate bodies by tomorrow if we’re lucky.”
At this, Astarion looked equal parts terrified and disheartened. Tav wasnt sure what caused it, but she figured she would ask. It concerned her. She thought he would want to get back to his body, but she could see the appeal of their current arrangement.
“What’s wrong, honey?”
“It’s silly…” Astarion was going to try to turn to the other side of the bed when Tav stopped him. She placed her hand on his arm and got his attention as she sat on the edge of the bed facing him.
“It is not silly. Please talk to me.” Tav asked. Astarion sighed and turned to fully face her.
“First, having a period absolutely scares me. I’d rather help you through one instead of having it myself. I may...usually...be the vampire and think myself pretty strong, but you, my dear, are a beast. I don’t think I could handle your cycle.”
“I wish I could tell you when my cycle was, but since arriving in Baldur’s Gate, my cycle has stopped. Shadowheart says stress can make me irregular. Hopefully, we’ll be switched before it happens,” Tav stripped her shirt off followed by her pants before slipping underneath the bed covers. “And the second issue?”
“I feel absolutely spoiled being in your body, my love, and I was hoping for a little more time. You deserve to have your original body back, though.” Astarion tried to turn his head away from Tav in shame, but Tav wouldn’t let him.
“Oh, Astarion,” Tav cooed “It makes sense that you want to keep a living body. You haven’t had one in such a long time. You don’t have to worry about wanting that. I understand”
Astarion sighed and smiled slightly. Tav continued to speak.
“I’d love to let you hang out in my body for longer, but we have Gortash to worry about. He hasnt acted against us yet, but that doesn’t mean he won’t.”
Astarion nodded as she had a point and smiled genuinely. “I guess we have to make the most use of this time as we can, darling.”
“I agree with you, but we can’t stay holed up in this room forever. Why don’t we take a small stroll? Stretch our legs a bit.”
Astarion laughed “I’ve been stretched pretty good, if last night was any indication. I didn’t realize how thick I was, dear, but I know why you want me so much.” Astarion said with a wink and a goofy smile.
Tav brought her hand up to her forehead and placed her palm against her skin in exasperation. “I can say the same, you know.” Tav picked out some clothing and put it to the side as she filled the bathtub in the room. She wasn’t going to let Astarion run about outside in her body with come dripping down his thighs. She felt sweaty and grimy after last night as well. Thankfully, the room was equipped with a large tub, so the pair could take a bath together. “I know how much you love my breasts and ass.”
“Ah, but you don’t know my favorite part.” Astarion chided, swinging his legs out of bed and standing up to stretch.
“And what would that be?” Tav asked as she stripped her clothing to reveal Astarion’s perfect body. Astarion watched her and smiled.
“Gods, I’m beautiful.” Astarion muttered to himself but Tav heard him clear as day. “To answer your question, it is your thighs. They’re so soft, yet strong. I love biting them and caressing them. They hold my head up when I lay on your lap. That’s not to discount what is between them, of course. I love that, too, but your thighs are supple and oh so delicious.” Astarion walked over to the tub and removed his clothing as well, careful around her breasts as they were unusually tender.
Tav got in after Astarion and sunk into the hot water. The water warmed her skin and Tav found she missed her body more than she realized. Tav moaned as she sunk into the water, Astarion smiled and made his way next to her, kissing her shoulder and neck as he brought the sponge up to wash her aching muscles. Tav closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of him delicately washing her newly acquired body, but she couldn’t keep her eyes closed for long. Astarion made sure of that when he spoke.
“You need breakfast, my dear, if we are going anywhere. Bite me.”
Tav opened her eyes to see Astarion turned his head to the side and was presenting his neck to her. Tav could feel herself beginning to get hard at the thought of that sweet and velvety blood beneath the surface, but she had to confirm first.
“You realize what will happen, right? There is a chance I won’t be able to stop, and even if I do, I’ll be...wanting. I can try to figure out how you take care of yourself, I guess.”
“Just shut up and bite me. It will be okay.”
Tav licked her lips and kissed his neck a few times after a brief moment of hesitation. Tav sunk her teeth into the waiting flesh and felt the hot rich blood hit the back of her throat. Tav drank it greedily, but was startled when she felt Astarion begin to jerk her off. He would stroke her mast and twist near the blunted head of her cock. Astarion wasn’t teasing as he stroked her and was already pumping her length at a punishing pace. Tav couldn’t help the whimper that came out of her as she drank and was getting pleasured. Astarion gave a wide smile which looked a little odd on Tav’s body.
“I need to take you. Now!” Tav muttered against his flesh and Astarion dropped his smile into a lustful smirk.
“I was prepared to jerk you off, my love.” Astarion’s hand slowed to a stop as he spoke to Tav.
“I need more. Please let me taste you when you come!” Tav licked the wounds, sealing them, and licked her lips. “I can’t chance taking too much blood. Here.” Tav fished a scroll out of her bag that was next to the tub. Tav got out to grab it and when she handed it to Astarion, he noted the familiarity right away. It was a scroll of lesser restoration.
Astarion shook his head as he read the inscription, the words now memorized to him thanks to their adventure. Immediately, he felt relief and his strength return to him. Tav returned to the tub and sat near her lover. Astarion tossed the used parchment to the side and held Tav’s face dearly as he pressed his lips to hers...hard.
“I’m aching to have you inside me” Astarion huskily said as he gave her a moment to breathe. Astarion spread his legs and hooked one behind Tav’s back. Astarion went back to kissing Tav once again, the water sloshing around the tub as their bodies moved and melted against one another. Astarion cradled Tav’s head and locked his fingers in her (or rather his) silver locks of hair, his other hand hand snaked around Tav’s backside and slide deftly between her cheeks. Tav was startled at first but that changed when Astarion passionately locked his lips on his significant other’s. Astarion slipped his finger against Tav’s rear, circling the tight muscle but never entering her.
Tav pulled away from their dancing tongues and soft lips intertwined to speak “You’re teasing me. Please!”
“Water is a poor substitute for lubricating jelly, what do you say we take this outside the bath?”
“Yes! Please! I need you!” Tav reached down and cupped Astarion’s backside, lifting him up and out of the tub. This made Astarion yelp in surprise as usually he was the one doing such things but with the swapped situation, it took some getting used to. Tav dropped him on the bed as he searched for the jar they kept in the night stand.
“Come here.” Astarion whispered against Tav’s neck. Tav leaned over Astarion and kissed his ears, licking the helix or the shell of the ear. Astarion moaned deeply. Regardless of his race or gender, his ears still were sensitive to her pleasure. Astarion pulled away and put some of the lubrication on his fingers before he returned his Attention on Tav. He kissed her once more with passion. His tongue lid against hers and he savored the motion like he was sipping wine. Astarion reached around while she was distracted and surprised Tav with the cool jelly being pressed to her sphincter. Astarion knew that although his body was used to such actions, she was not, so he gently began working the muscle with one finger. Astarion slipped the finger in, earning a gasp from Tav followed by a moan. Astarion began pumping Tav’s cock in tandem to his finger’s actions inside her, soon Astarion added a second finger.
“S...Stop! I don’t want to come by your hands.”
Astarion immediately pulled away and used a rag on the side of the basin they were in to wipe his fingers of the jelly he had on him. Astarion sat down on the bed and wasn’t surprised when Tav pushed him back and spread his legs.
“We don’t have to if…” Tav began to speak when Astarion kissed her again, cutting her off. Astarion glided his tongue against hers as their kiss was more teeth and tongue than lips. Astarion was accidentally nipped by Tav’s fang and loved the moan Tav gave off from tasting his blood.
“I want this. I want you.” Astarion muttered. “Fuck me so good I can’t walk.”
“Happily.” Tav replied as she got back on the bed and crawled between his knees. Astarion felt her sultry look affect him down to his core. Astarion leaned up to kiss Tav again but felt Tav fondle his breast. Astarion moaned low in his stomach from the sensation and how sensitive his breasts were. Astarion tried once more to kiss Tav when Tav chuckled and began kissing as well as fondling his breasts, Tav dropped a hand lower still and began to circle lazy rotations around his clit. Astarion’s breath hitched as he rocked his hips forward, trying to chase the feeling of pure bliss between his legs. Astarion arched his back as the pleasure rolled through him and drove him on.
“Enough. Fuck me, love. No more foreplay, I need you!”
Tav smirked and moved up slightly so the tip of her cock rested at Astarion’s entrance. Tav moved her hand to her cock and lined herself up as she firmly gripped her undead flesh.
“Spread yourself wider, darling.” Tav jokingly used Astarion’s term of endearment. Astarion barked out a laugh and spread his legs as wide as they could go, this gave Tav a splendid and delicious view of his cunt. Tav was secretly happy she got a chance to see herself as Astarion did. Seeing her designer like labia and vagina made her feel like she had more to offer in terms of sex to Astarion (of course, she would never say that.)
Tav kept herself ready and when Astarion had exhaled and relaxed his body, Tav began to sink into the man inch by delicious inch. Astarion moaned until Tav reached the hilt. When Tav filled and stretched within, Astarion’s moan turned into a whimper.
Tav started at a punishing pace.
After waiting a moment for Astarion to adjust, Tav lifted his left leg and began rolling her hips in an angle. Tav rolled her hips fast and hard and slid her cock against the wet, hot sensitive muscles inside. Astarion panted when he wasn't kissing Tav, the sound of slapping skin and squelching occasionally permeated the room. They had only just started, and already Tav and Astarion were sweating. Astarion brought his hand to Tav’s face as she pounded into him, whimpers, moans and whines escaping his lips as the pressure built up inside of him. Astarion drew Tav closer and pressed Tav’s face even closer to his neck.
“Feed. Gods, please feed! It will feel so good.”
Astarion hooked his legs behind Tav’s hips and turned his head to give her better leverage. Astarion felt her sink her teeth in gently, a stark contrast to the rough sex he was receiving. The feeling was strange. A brief moment of cold stinging pain and then, Astarion guessed it was something to do with the vampirism or a venom of some kind, the pain became pleasurable. He felt his loins burn and the coil inside him tighten. The bite and drinking was so intimate, so close that Astarion felt right doing this with Tav. Only Tav. His Tav.  His fangs would only know one person and he damn well meant it. She was his everything.
Soon, the coil that was so tightly wrapped inside him was in danger of snapping. Astarion began to warn Tav.
“I’m…I’m going…”
Tav didn’t let him finish the sentence as she brought her hand between their legs once more and began to rub his engorged and swollen clit in circles precisely. With a cry and a yell of Tav’s name, Tav felt him clench and contract around her cock, his orgasm ripped through him and Tav tasted a new flavor in the blood as he came. It was a rich spiciness that enhanced the existing silky flavor, Tav couldn’t get enough, and soon, without realizing the want in her lower belly was pulled taut and a few more strokes later, she came inside her own body, spend coating the inner walls and began seeping and escaping out the sides where her phallus met his inner walls. It smeared his thighs and dripped down from his vaginal opening.
Tav licked the wounds closed and pulled away gingerly. Tav fished another scroll out when she finally pulled out and separated herself from her lover. She held it out to the panting man who needed a little help sitting up. Tav extended a hand and Astarion was able to hoist himself up from bed and sit against the headboard.
After getting cleaned up and another bath, the pair got ready for the day. They helped each other get their armor on, their boots and gauntlets aligned as well as their weapons secured.
“You sure you want to go out?” Astarion asked Tav, the post coital bliss still in effect.
“Yeah. We’ve been holed up most of the time we’ve been here. We should go out.”
Tav and Astarion made their way out of their room and down the stairs of the Elfsong Tavern. They made it down the street in an attempt to make their way to the famous Sorcerer’s Sundries when two beings began to tail the couple.
Astarion noticed the pair and whispered to Tav.
“There is an orc and an elf following us.”
“You sure?”
“Positive.”
Tav took Astarion’s hand and led him to an open area in front of the Sundries. As the couple approached the center pedestal where the commoners were, two more people snuck out of the crowd, surrounding them.
“Fuck.” Astarion cursed.
The couple paused their movement and looked around them.
“What do you want?” Astarion called out, hoping to resolve the situation peacefully rather than violently due to their unique situation. If Astarion was back in his body, he’d revel in murder, but while occupying his lover’s? He wouldn’t dare.
“You already have what we want! Come quietly and we won’t be forced to hurt you.”
Tav stepped in front of Astarion, teeth bared and growling, but it was not enough to scare them off. Instead, out of the two new stalkers, a drow and a halfling, the halfling charged forward and attempted to use a trident on Tav. Tav was able to dodge but not without a scratch. She was grazed on the arm by the outside of the trident, Tav trying and failing to hit the halfling with her dagger. The halfling was a woman, clad in dark like the rest while the orc who attempted to come at Astarion from behind was male. Astarion swung his greatsword to keep him at a distance. The female elf and the male drow watched as the two were preoccupied and both of them tried to grab Astarion as Tav was distracted in addition to Astarion from the other two attackers.
“Ignis!” shouted a voice from afar as the two other attackers closed in on Tav and Astarion.
The drow went up in flames, making him run to the fountain in the center of the promenade. Another fireball hit in front of the orc, making him back up and away from Astarion.
Gale, Halsin, and Shadowheart came into view from Sorcerer's Sundries, able and ready for battle. Halsin wild shaped into a bear, Shadowheart healed Tav and Gale used Magic Missile to send the rest of the attackers away. The attackers fled, limping and in pain. One, the one who was burned, dared not move. He remained in the fountain.
Tav went to interrogate the man when Gale interceded.
“Tav, don’t! We know what they want and it isn't for others to hear.” Gale explained, his hand resting on Tav’s wrist to stop her from approaching the man in pain.
“Is there anything you can tell me?” Tav snapped, knowing how weird it was to be attacked in broad daylight and in a busy place.
“It is related to our recent...situation. The wizard I was seeking wants something for our help, but I don’t feel comfortable telling you here of all places. Let’s head back and we can go over everything...in detail.” Gale explained
“My love, it may be best we leave anyways. The Fists are bound to show up soon after all the racket we made.” Astarion said and took Tav’s hand into his as he pulled her slightly back towards the tavern’s direction.
It took about ten minutes for the group to make it to the Elfsong Tavern. Once there, Astarion and Tav made it upstairs and was about to open the companion room door when Halsin gently redirected Tav towards their private room.
“This conversation is private.” Halsin whispered. The group filed into the room while the couple sat down on their bed.
“So what was so important we couldn’t mention it anywhere else?” Tav was a little short. She was in a difficult situation, her stomach was always hungry, she was cold and now her friends were wearing on her patience.
“We went to meet a wizard, as you know, who may have the answers we seek to fix your condition. The problem is, he is not the altruistic sort. His demands were too much and I’ll have to find another way as a backup to fix the pair of you.” Gale explained but Tav noticed his eyes were never settling on hers. His smile never met his eyes and something was going on.
“What aren't you telling me?” Tav demanded, her hand laced in Astarion’s hand.
Gale sighed and drew his hand over his face in frustration. Halsin offered an easy smile and a caring demeanor when he spoke next. Shadowheart remained silent but kept staring at Astarion.
“Tav, the wizard was asking for your child. A half vampire, or rather called, a dhampir. You’re pregnant, Tav.”
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tw-kingbaby · 1 year
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under the 120's, finally. but i've been stalled out at 118 for a week and a half thanks to a lot of social eating close together. so frustrating. i hate 18 more pounds to lose in the next three months so i can be happy for my 3 month trip to italy. 10 more so that i can maintain my current weight for the three month duration, since i carry 10lbs of water. but i want to be a solid 100 when i touch down there. not 110. regardless, it'll upset my partner's mother (which is good). but i want to be smaller.
anyway, i'm thinking of all of the progress i've made since december 2021. 72lbs lost in a a year and 5 months. with a cumulative 4 month break (first 1 month and then 3 all together). it's an incredible amount of progress. as i sit here, about to complete one of my countless 24 hour fasts, i think back to my very first one and how difficult it was, and how happy i was to eat afterwards. and then the awful pain in my stomach from eating too much. the other day i was thinking about my very first successful purge, as i clutched the bowl and emptied my guts from a family picnic. i count my ribs in the mirror and remember how invisible they were under so many layers of fat. i'm feeling very nostalgic as i come up on my second big ED break.
i'm...happy. i'm destroying myself but i'm happy. it's sick, but i delight in the nights i spend, consumed by hunger, ravaging the pickle jar and sucking down packets of konjac. telling myself the old ana slogan of "skip dinner wake up thinner" as i lay awake in bed, unable to sleep from the hunger. on paper, this is misery. it is in practice, too. i suffer every day but i wake up and choose to do this every day.
i know, i know. an ed is not a choice. but recovery is. i've definitely thought about it on those hungry, exhausted nights. even now, images of pizza and fried food dance in my mind. the wish for a full, hot meal. doordash is like a porn site for me. but i choose to keep going, headed towards my next goals.
i think this whole post got triggered from an image i saw a few minutes ago on pancake. "today is the tomorrow you talked about yesterday". my first restriction meal, when i made the jump and committed, was 1000 calories of frozen pizza. i remember telling myself that was it, and to enjoy it. because there would be no going back after that. no more junk, and no more food for the rest of the day. that night i made my overnight oats for the first time, and set up a low cal casserole so i could portion out my meals. and that's where it began. 1000 down to 800. struggling through christmas and then getting right back on.
i'm off to reread my old logs, on my previous blog before i lost the login. all the way back from when i began. the nostalgia is killing me.
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imagine-that-100 · 4 years
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Truth Serum
Description: Matty Healy x Reader (Female) | You’ve been friends with Matty for quite a few years and he thinks he knows pretty much everything about you. Like how you’re always more honest when you’d had a drink and even more so when you’re tired too. But when a head injury and strong painkillers are added to that equation, for Matty it’s entertaining, but for you it’s a recipe for heartbreak. 
Word Count: 9.7k
Warnings: A lil bit of angst but mostly fluff.
A/N: This was requested by @jagz72​! Sorry it took so long but I got VERY carried away and just couldn't stop writing. I really hope you enjoy reading it, I definitely enjoyed writing it. I hope everyone has a very Happy New Year! This year has been amazing (on Tumblr) and I’ve connected with so many people on here it’s been really lovely making so many new friends. I’m wishing you all a wonderful 2021!
Likes and Reblogs are appreciated but most of all, thank you so much for reading x
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This really wasn’t how you hoped your day would go. But here you were, sitting on a hospital bed with a nurse shining a torch in your eyes making sure you were okay.
The reason you were here may be funny in the future when you tell it back to your kids or something. But right now, you were worried and so was the man that was holding your hand, who’d been the cause of your injury.
Matty had brought you to A&E as soon as the incident happened.
You'd been friends for 3 years, so it really wasn’t anything out of the ordinary these days when Matty popped by early in the morning. You knew he liked getting out of his house so his inability to sleep for long durations didn’t suffocate him.
After all, no one liked lying in bed wide awake when you knew you were meant to be asleep.
So, you’d given him a key many moons ago to try and help him combat that. You were a creative person, be that crafting or baking or painting.
You had it all.
So, his mind could run wild in your house and he’d yet to get bored. You’d woken up more than once to find him in your lounge, painting once but most of the time you found him trying to replicate your baking goods.
And he was really shit at it.
When he walked into your home this morning, you were already up and in the kitchen baking. Truthfully it was a surprise to see you up and about so early as it was only 6:30.
You didn’t sleep very well last night as you’d been out drinking with a few friends. You never really slept well after an alcohol filled night. It always left you really dehydrated and because you lived quite a bit out of London, not too far from Matty, you most of the time started with your hangover before you even got back home.
But that was the choice you made when you went into the city to drink.
So in theory Matty shouldn't have been surprised when he saw you already awake this morning. He knew you’d gone out and he knew what drinking did to you.
Matty quite liked when you got drunk with him, you were a really funny person and you pretty much had no filter when you had alcohol in your system. That was always fun for you all when you went out, and Matty loved the taxis back home with you on nights like that.
He always brought an extra drink in the taxi with him so your hangover wouldn’t start in the 30 minute drive back.
Matty had greeted you with a hug when he walked into your house and found that you were in the kitchen. You seemed really happy to see him too and you got to chatting about how Notes was coming along.
But it seemed that you and Matty let time get the better of you as Matty kept teasing you for practically still being drunk. The alcohol that was still present in your system obviously hadn’t worn off it’s truth serum effects yet and Matty liked to tease you about doing impulsive things, like baking cookies at 7:30 in the morning.  
The next time Matty looked at the clock though, he was really late for a meeting. Your tired, tipsy, sleep deprived self had been quite entertaining leading him to forget that he had people to meet.
Jamie had called him double checking about the meeting that was meant to be starting at 8:45. But the time was now 9:22 and he still hadn’t showed up so Jamie, being the friendly manager he was, just called him up to check if he was okay.
“Oh fuck.” Matty curses looking at the caller ID and the time.
You look around at Matty worriedly and ask, “What’s wrong?”
“I’m meant to be at a meeting with Jamie and the lads right now.” Matty tells you, “I’ll be just a minute.”
Matty goes out of the kitchen to answer the call as he didn’t want to disturb your early morning baking. He didn't care if you could hear what he said or not he just didn't want to disturb your morning.
That and he was going to try and get out of the meeting so he could stay and eat all the cookies you’d yet to put in the oven.
Matty answers Jamie and profusely apologises for lacking manners to show up to a meeting on time. Thankfully, Jamie isn’t that fussed about it and suggests putting the meeting back as he was free until early afternoon.
Matty jumps at that chance.  
But then Matty practically whips himself around with the intent to ask you how long it will take to bake the cookies so he’d know how long to push the meeting back, but he never gets that far. When Matty turns around, he barges his shoulder straight into you causing you to be pushed back.
You were just about to make your way past him to get your phone from where you’d put it on charge in your lounge earlier, but that was long forgotten when your head smacked off the corner of the wooden door frame behind you.  
The bang to the back of your head shocked Matty to his core. You both stopped dead and looked at each other and as soon as Matty’s hands rested on your shoulders he kept apologising.
“Shit shit shit. Y/N are you okay?!” Matty asks, his hands flying to your shoulders to steady you, his phone still in his hand.
“I’m okay.” You tell him in shock, moving away from the door frame a little to hold the back of your head.
You could feel a lump forming already, but there was no blood, so you guessed you were alright. Matty quickly puts his phone to his ear to tell Jamie he’d call him back before he pockets his phone and holds your shoulders again.
“I’m so sorry Y/N. I didn't know you were there, are you okay? Did I hurt you?” Matty asks worriedly.
“Not your fault Matty.” You tell him, “I’m fine.”
Something which Matty doesn’t believe for a solid minute despite you assuring him that you were okay.
Once he relaxes a little, he pulls you into a hug as another way to apologise. You also relax and take your hand off the back of your head to hug him back, trying to assure him you’re okay. But you can’t help the curse that falls from your lips as you could already feel a headache coming on.
“Fuck me.” You say resting your forehead down on his shoulder.
His eyes go wide, “Really?” Matty questions in shock.
“No.” You say immediately, and Matty is about to laugh until you correct your statement to, “Well, not right now.”
Matty’s eyes widen, “What?”  
You didn’t even say it in a sarcastic or joking way. Matty immediately felt the need to pry.
“My head hurts a little.” You whine into his shoulder, but he assumes it's to try and distract from the little slip up you just had.
And as much as Matty wanted to make your head better instantly he was shocked by what you said. So before he could stop himself he grins, “Tell me what you just said.”
“Matty I’m fine, go to your meeting.” You say picking your head up off his shoulder.
He looks into your Y/E/C eyes and they narrow as he asks if he hears correctly, “You said I couldn’t fuck you right now?”
“Yeah, so?” You shake your head as if you didn’t remember saying that.
Matty looks at you curiously, frowning a little as the thought had never really crossed his mind that you thought of him like that. “You want me to fuck you?”
“We’re not discussing this right now.” You shake your head again but Matty sees pain flash through your eyes. You hold the back of your head again and he can see you're actually in pain. “Matty, my head hurts.”
“I’ll get you some ice.” Matty says letting go of your waist and looking to your fridge freezer across the room.
Before he can move though you grab his arm and say, “No, go to your meeting.”
“You can’t just say you want me to fuck you and then tell me to go to a meeting Y/N.” Matty grins at you.  
You close your eyes and sigh, “Matty.”
Matty’s grin gets bigger and he holds your waist again and teasingly says your name, “Y/N.”
“You shouldn’t be joking about this now...” You shake your head a little harder, “You just made me accidentally whack my head on the fucking door fra- oh... I feel dizzy.” You say and Matty’s heart goes in his throat when your eyes roll to the back of your head and you almost go limp in his arms.
“Shit.” Matty says, tightening his hold around you so you don't fall to the floor and hit your head again.
And that was how you ended up in A&E at 9:55 on a Friday morning.
“Okay so, you’re okay but you’ve had a moderate concussion and you're unfortunately going to be in pain for a day or two with it.” The nurse tells you when she stops shining the torch in your eyes.
“We will give you stronger painkillers than the ones you’ve already taken but with these you need to be woken up every two hours when you go to sleep tonight. Try and stay awake as long as possible today and then,” She looks to Matty, “You need to wake her a little every two hours. Not like getting up and about but she needs to respond or you call an ambulance.”
“Oh he’s n-” You start to correct her to wonder what you need to do for yourself because Matty wouldn’t be with you.
But Matty says, “Yeah course, I can do that.”
After the nurse told you and Matty what symptoms of things getting worse to look out for you picked up your prescription from the chemist. After that though you expected to go back home and try to relax your headache away but Matty refused to let you out of his sight because it was his fault you were in this state.
So Matty took you to his pushed back meeting and took you to the studio afterwards as he had to keep his eye on you. You weren’t chatty throughout it all, as you tried to keep yourself to yourself.
But that didn’t mean that you didn’t find the meeting fucking boring and you felt like you were intruding in the studio. But you did get another insight into their new album which was fun.
You tried to keep your mouth shut whilst you listened to it, liking to take in the lyrics but when you did you were a little shocked about it.
The song you were allowed to listen to today was Nothing Revealed/ Everything Denied and there were a few revelations in there that you weren't expecting. But you tried to keep that as quiet as you could because the strong painkillers mixed with the lack of sleep was also acting as another form of truth serum.
Since taking your painkillers early this afternoon, you’d been messy to say the least. You’d made a fool out of yourself when you complimented all of the other boys.
Earlier you basically told George earlier that you thought his tattoos were attractive. You told Ross that his hair was looking really good with it longer on top and you even accidentally moved it and styled it a tad for him. You forced yourself to not tell Adam that you found him hypnotic when he played the guitar.
“You have nice eyes” You tell Matty, but not actually meaning to, as you sat across from him at the cafe you’d gone to for lunch not far from the studio.
Matty glances back at you from the window then and he smiles, “Thank you”
He also feels the need to add, “You’ve got nice eyes too”
You seem to become a bit embarrassed then which makes Matty smile. You seem to disagree with his observation though and shake your head which confuses him a little, until you say, “I have boring eyes”
“Mine are literally the colour of this table Y/N” Matty says, pointing to the dark wood that your plates both rest on. “Not very interesting”
“They are interesting. They look like they see the world differently” You say honestly before looking back down to your food.
Matty watches as you eat then. It seemed like you didn’t mean to say that either because you went a bit shy again.
He decides to let this one slide but when you do it again he can’t help himself.
About 3 hours later, Matty was driving you both back home from the studio and he noticed that you were pretty silent in the car despite one of your favourite songs just being on the radio. Matty looks to you after the song finishes and notices your leaning your head on the window.
Your eyes were closed and you looked a bit better than earlier, so he asked you, “How you feeling, love?”
But you didn’t answer him and that makes him panic a little bit. He forgot you weren’t allowed to sleep.
“Hey Y/N/N” Matty says, flicking his eyes between you and the road and he shakes your shoulder.
“I’m tired Matty, leave me alone ” You say shrugging his hand away.
“No no no stay awake” Matty says pulling on your hair a little bit instead to try and annoy you awake.
He does it for a minute and he only stops when you pick your head up off the window. You shift in your seat and turn towards him so you’re now facing him properly and resting your temple on the headrest.
You close your eyes again but you know he’s right, so you ask, “Can you keep chatting to me to keep me awake because I don’t think I can do it on my own.”
“Fuck.” Matty chuckles.
You always told him to shut up. Never to keep talking.
“Have I broken you?” Matty chuckles a little looking back to the road.
“Not in the way I want you to break me.” Matty hears you whisper and his eyes go wide.  
He sees that your eyes were closed again but this time you were curled up on the seat facing him. It didn’t even look like you knew what you just said.
He immediately turns his head and asks in shock, “Do you know you said that out loud?”
“I said that out loud?” You ask, your eyes open in shock.
“Yes Y/N.” Matty smirks glancing back at the road and then at you again.
You look mortified and you pull your phone out  of your pocket and distract yourself on that. You don’t look at him as you say, “Well pretend I didn’t”
Matty wants answers though. “Y/N do you wa-“
But you interrupt with, “Matty when are you releasing Notes because I wanna play If You’re too Shy on repeat?”
“Y/N/N.” Matty tries again but you have none of it.
“Answer me.” You insist, evidently not wanting to revert back to what you said.  
Matty gives in and estimates, “Like May-ish.”
“May?” You question in an annoyed sigh. “Matty you said it would be out last year.”
“Don’t believe what I say music wise.” Matty says looking back to the road now as you definitely weren’t going to go back to the topic of him ‘breaking you’. “I said that we were stopping the band after Notes remember and that’s changed.”
“Yeah, I don’t know why you ever said that. You belong on a stage”. You say as you scroll back through your phone.  
“Thanks Darling” Matty grins, “Do you like watching me up on stage?”
He hopes to get another comment out of you like before. But he just gets a sarcastic, “Oh yeah Hun, you look like the drama queen you are.”  
You’re good with your slip ups after that until late at night when you head up to bed with Matty following close behind joking about the ‘adult sleepover’ you were having. He’d insisted he was staying and doing the checks on you every two hours.
You were fine with that as he’d stayed in your bed before when the both of you had passed out mid movie nights, but the jokes you could do without. Especially when your lips were speaking so freely from the meds you were on and the lack of sleep in your system.
“You hurt me Matthew, you should be taking care of me not asking me to shag you” You say before heading into your bathroom to get changed after throwing a pair of joggers his way.  
When you re-enter your bedroom, you see Matty already under your duvet and you give him a hug once you lie yourself down beside him.
“You’re never this touchy with me” Matty says a minute into the hug that's practically turned into a cuddle.  
“Because I don’t know if you like me touching you.” You say as you let go of him and grab the pillow under your head to bring it between you so you could hug it as you drifted off to sleep.
But you leave Matty confused then. You were never the touchy type in general and in the time he’d known you, he’d never seen you with the boyfriend you had when you initially met so he didn’t even know if you were a cuddly person in a relationship.  
“You don’t like anyone touching you.” Matty says after your eyes had been closed for a few seconds.  
You don’t open them back up again, not even when you admit, “I like you touching me.”
It makes Matty once again freeze as he wasn’t expecting your honesty. And he certainly wasn’t expecting you to continue with, “Makes my day when you give me a hug or kiss my cheek or give me a loving headlock, even if your hair does tickle my face when you do it.”
You chuckle a little at the end of your sentence which leads Matty to do as well, at both your honesty and the comment about his hair. The way you’re smiling into your pillow is also impossible for Matty now to smile at.
“I love your hair, you know?” You tell him, still keeping your eyes closed.  
Matt smiles at the fact your filter seems to be completely gone at this point. So Matty feels the need to compliment you back.
“I love your hair.” Matty tells you, tucking a strand of it that had fallen onto your face behind your ear. He tells you honestly, “I like messing with it”
“Mhhh” You hum with a smile. You add in a whisper, “I like it when you pull on it.”
Matty is once again taken aback by your statement and this time he can’t let it go. The teasing remarks that you’d been accidently letting slip all day had to have meant something, or you wouldn’t look so sheepish after you said them.
Like just now you were cuddling yourself into your pillow more than you already had been and Matty just couldn’t bring himself to let it go. Yeah it may not be the time for such a conversation at 1:48am but here you both were.
And Matty had to know.  
So after a silent minute he said, “Y/N”
“What?” You ask softly.  
“You know I can hear you whispering?”
“Maybe you were meant to.” You tiredly suggest, your voice barely above a whisper.  
“Where’s this all coming from?” Matty asks, a little amused as you never gave out compliments unless it was about his music.
The music was something you never joked about but you always did with him and the rest of the band.
Matty watches as you internally battle with yourself on what to reply. But it seems the truth ends up being your easiest option despite you sighing before you start.  
“I think I like you a lot Matty.” You tell him and it shocked the curly haired man to his soul. You carry on, your eyes still closed, “And once I slipped up I couldn’t stop myself from carrying on.”
Matty struggles to find words for a moment there. He didn’t know what he was expecting but it certainly wasn’t this.
“I think about you all the time when I’m not supposed to…” You trail off for a moment there leaving the room in silence. Something which then leads to you add in a sad tone, “And I get it if you leave... I wouldn’t like me either but I’m sick of hiding it now.”
Matty stumbles again but he just about manages to ask, “Ho- How long...? Have you liked me?”
“I think I noticed after George’s party” You say thinking back to three months ago.
“Why?” Matty asks, not remembering anything significantly different about that night compared to the others you’ve shared together.  
“Because you’re you” You say simply.
Matty frowns a little then, not annoyed he doesn’t think, but maybe a little disappointed. He didn’t want people to like him because he was Matty Healy from The 1975 anymore.
Matty wanted that left behind in 2015. That’s why he’d had the long relationship with Gabby and that was why he’d only been out with very few people since her, Twigs being the only one that got a little serious. But all of them eventually fizzled out for different reasons.
Matty just didn’t want people to want him because of who he was on stage or who the media presented him as anymore. He was done with it... completely and utterly-
“You always make me laugh by pulling a face when I’ve had a bad day at work.” You carry on after those few seconds of silence, and you continue on to say, “You know my shit and you tease me about it but in a fun loving sorta way. You tuck your hair behind your ear when you're nervous which is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen and I get jealous when you do it to other girls and not me, but that’s fine. And my heart goes rapid when you tell me a cheesy joke because you decided to tell it me first. And I find myself wanting you to be around all the time even if it’s the middle of the night.”
You finish off your tired rambling leaving Matty on the opposite side of your bed completely stunned. So much so that the man who always has something to say is left speechless.
Nothing coming out of his mouth even if he could think of something to say. You have completely stunned him.
He is so desperately trying to think of a way to reply to you that he doesn’t realise how much time passes. The only thing that rips him out of his thoughts are your next soft words.
“Am I allowed to go to sleep now or do I have to stay awake?” You question in a whisper, your voice thick with tiredness.  
Matty looks at your soft stunning features and just about manages to whisper back, “You can sleep... But don’t you want me to tell you how I’m feeling?”
You shake your head into your pillow and Matty listens intently when you say, “I’d rather have ten more minutes of us being friends without it being awkward and then I can wake up tomorrow and cry when you’re not there and don’t want to be my friend anymore.”
And just that sentence alone breaks Matty's heart. He assures you, “I’m never going to not be your friend”
Because no matter what happened tomorrow he didn’t want to lose you. You’d always been such a good friend, there was no way Matty was ever going to let that go.
“But you’re not going to be close with me anymore because you know I like you.” You say, your voice full of melancholy. But you for some reason feel the need to assure him, “And that’s okay. I wouldn’t like me either... But thank you for being my friend for as long as you have.”
“Y/N” Matty starts but you don’t let him finish.
“Goodnight Matty. Talk in the morning.” You say, “But if you go, I understand. I won’t bother you anymore.”
“I’m n-” Matty tired again but your tired voice interrupts once more.  
“Thanks for everything Matty.” You say giving him a smile, your eyes still closed but you must have known he was watching you.
That night Matty didn’t sleep a wink. You were all he could think about. He lay on the other side of your bed for hours trying to process everything you said.
He couldn’t believe it. He was really shocked by your honesty just before you went to sleep but as you spoke he could physically see your body relax. As if it was a weight of your shoulders which he guessed it must have been.
Matty took the hours he lay awake and processed everything about yours and his friendship through his mind. And there were so many happy memories.
Matty didn't even get through the first year before his 2 hour alarm went off on his apple watch and he stirred you a bit to make sure you were still alive. He of course knew you were but when you hummed a little in response to him calling your name that was enough for Matty to let you rest again.
Matty went over every single thing he could remember in his mind. The highs and the lows of the last 3 years in your presence and he was smiling throughout most of it.
Sometimes his thoughts got away with him so much he had to put the TV you had in your room on to distract him. The volume stayed on low but he had to distract himself because not getting a chance to talk to you left him wanting to wake you up and talk everything through.
But he knew you’d had a shit night’s sleep the previous day and the bump on your head had left you really tired. So he couldn’t deprive you the rest you definitely needed.
But now it was 7:36 and Matty couldn’t just lie in bed next to you anymore. He had to go do something.  
~*~*~*~
You woke up the next morning afraid to open your eyes. You were petrified.
Of course you remembered everything that had been said the night before and you knew if you opened your eyes and saw the guy you fancied beside you that your friendship at the very least would be okay. But if you opened your eyes to see an empty bed, you know you fucked it completely.
So that was why you kept your eyes closed for 5 minutes once you woke up. You could hear your TV playing music from the other side of the room so you never heard Matty breathing. But there was a reason for that.
Because when you opened your eyes, you found an empty bed.
Your heart sank and immediately tears came to your eyes. You knew you shouldn’t have done it. You shouldn’t have told him anything.
Now you’d lost your good friend and probably the rest of the band on the way. By the time you sat up and walked into your bathroom, the tears were freely streaming down your face.
You didn’t even try to stop them. You just let them fall and got in the shower so you could cry to your heart’s content.
Your chest hurt. It hurt in a way it hadn’t for a long time because you’d not let anyone in like you’d accidentally let Matty in.
And of course he wasn’t interested in you. Why would he be?
You were no Halsey or Gabby or FKA Twigs. You were no one’s love of their life, but you thought Matty might have been yours.
It was so stupid of you to think like that.
You hoped the 20 minute shower would have been enough time to settle your heartache but apparently it wasn’t. You were still crying long after you turned the water off and you got yourself dry.
You cried as you blow dried your hair, you cried as you changed into your comfort pair of joggers (the ones you’d loaned Matty last night) and your massively baggy hoodie. You couldn’t stop the tears from flowing which meant that the pressure behind your eyes started to hurt your head.
You turned the TV off but that didn’t help. So you went downstairs to get yourself a drink and some painkillers as your injury from yesterday wasn’t helping either.
But when you opened your kitchen door the bang of something hitting the worktop didn’t help either. You push the door open fully and we’re shocked to see your kitchen in an absolute state with Matty standing there in his clothes from yesterday with a tray full of unbaked cookies in his hand.
“What are you doing?” The words come out of your mouth as you look at the state that your kitchen was in.
There’s baking goods everywhere and from the things that were out you couldn’t tell if he was making bread or some sort of cake. You were very confused but your curly haired friend also looked confused.
He didn’t turn to look at you as he was trying to make sure the cookies that were on the tray didn’t roll off as he put them in the oven. He opened up the now very hot contraption and once they were in and the door was shut he quickly put a timer on his phone to check them after a while.
“I’m trying to make you some cookies. But you know yours are always going to be better than mine because the first batch I tried I put icing sugar instead of cast-  what’s wrong?” Matty asks, finally turning to look at you.
When he did, he saw that your eyes were swollen and your cheeks were puffy and your eyes were all bloodshot. He threw the oven glove to the side not caring where it went and walked over to you, “Why are you crying?”
You withdraw then and look down away from him. The ball immediately rises back to your throat and the tears that had just briefly stopped are threatening to flow again.
“Y/N/N” Matty takes your hand so you can’t move away again.
You shake your head and look down to the ground. You just about managed to get out, “Doesn’t matter”
“Course it matters, you’re upset” Matty says but you just shake your head and don’t look at him.
But that doesn’t mean he can see the tears rolling down your cheeks.
“Come here” He says, pulling you into a hug and you truly didn’t realise how much you needed it.
You inhale a very shaky breath which hurts Matty’s heart so he asks again, running a hand up and down your back, “What’s wrong? Why are you upset?”
You don’t have the energy to make up a lie so you just tell him the truth.
“You weren’t there when I woke up. I thought I lost you” You whisper but your voice comes out in a much higher octave than usual as you’re trying not to fully sob again.
Matty pulls away from the hug but keeps you close. Both his hands come up to cup your face and his thumbs brush away your tears and he says softly, “Don’t cry”
“Matty I’ve been crying for the better part of an hour, you telling me to stop won’t just make it happen” You half laugh half whine.
Your emotions were everywhere. You couldn’t believe he was still here. You still weren’t to be fair, you were half sure you were dreaming.
“You really think I would just leave you?” Matty asks with a tiny frown as he again wipes another tear away.
“Well yeah.” You shrug a little pathetically before carrying on in a pained voice, ”You don’t owe me anything. I’m just some girl you know. I’m not one important, so why would you stay?”
“Because you’re so much more than that you’ve just said.” Matty tells you honestly. His heart hurting that you thought of yourself like that.
“You don’t have to pretend.” You shake your head, ”I’m a big girl, I can handle rejection.”
Matty can’t believe you don’t get it.
“Y/N/N I’m standing in your house trying to bake you cookies, comforting you, I always flirt with you and I have done for ages… And you still think I want someone else?” Matty asks, wiping your tears away.
”No.“ Matty confirms, ”Yeah, you shocked me last night because you’ve never ever given me the slightest inkling that you liked me but when you started, it all fits Y/N.”
Matty continues to shock you with, “Why do you think I said ‘really’ yesterday when you said ‘fuck me’? I didn’t mean to say that just like you didn’t mean to say ‘not right now’.”
Matty grins as he finishes explaining, “But your you. You never let me get a word in edgeways which most of the time I love, but yesterday you didn’t let me get a chance to say that I fancy the fuck out of you.”
Your eyes go wide and you immediately shake your head, “No you don’t”
“Believe me I do.” Matty assures you, but you still don’t look like you believe him, “I don’t think you understand just how much though.”
“Because you don’t fancy me Matty. Stop trying to be nice” You shake your head and go to turn around but Mattys hand finds your hip and stops you turning.
Matty tells you honestly, “I’d say I’ve fancied you since we were out at that bar months ago and The Sound came on and you were dancing to it singing it to us.”
Matty grins as he continues, “And you did that thing I do on stage for the playing with yourself lyrics and I fully gulped. And then you pulled me up to dance with you and I loved listening and watching you sing my song at me.”
“A little narcissistic of you that Matty” You can’t help but say as you wipe away the tears that had sneaked down your eyes.
“Well it's lucky you like me anyway so I don’t even have to pretend it’s not.” Matty grins tucking a strand of your messy bed hair behind your ear. “Plus you looked really fucking good in those leather pants and you had the cutest most excited look on your face when you got me up dancing”
You giggle a little then and you half smile at him trying to make the tears stop. Matty helps with that by gently brushing his thumb over the bow sensitive skin under your eyes.
“So my beautiful and wonderful Y/N…” Matty likes the way you smile when he says that, “You need to stop crying because today I planned on wooing my best friend with cookies in exchange for a kiss and later on I was gunna get on my knees and beg my best friend to go out with me.”
You grin as you joke, “George is a lucky boy, isn’t he?”
“Shut up” Matty giggles.
You whisper a little, with a grin on your face, “Especially lucky for the get on your knees part.”
He gives you a knowing look then, but he just grins and asks, “How’s the head injury? Still making you spill your secrets I see”
You smile a little but only answer his question, “My head hurts from crying so it’s not a lot better.”
“Please stop crying.” Matty begs, ”I’d never leave you especially after that. I’m sorry I didn’t stay in bed, I just wanted to do something for you because you never got to finish making the cookies yesterday”
“You’re cute” You smile.
Matty mirrors it, “So are you.”
You smile at him and your eyes flick between both of his. He looked so gorgeous, yet so sleep deprived.
You're about to ask him about his sleep but Matty gets a question in there before you. “Can I kiss you now?”
Your eyes go wide, “No.”
“I feel vile, I’m all disgusting” You add sniffling a bit because you were all bunged up.
“Y/N you know how disgusting I am, do you really think I care?” Matty chuckles a little, again wiping away a stray tier.
You look into those gorgeous eyes and tell him, “I care”
Matty just pouts, looking down to your lips, “I wanna kiss you.”
You smile at his eagerness but softly plead, “Please wait until I’ve stopped crying.”
“Fine.” Matty says, “You win this one” and then he kisses your forehead.
You smile at the contact and Matty pulls you into a hug which you greatly appreciate. You tightly hug him back and you sort of melt into his warm body.
You feel another kiss being placed to the top of your head and you smile feeling that. “Come on Darling, gotta give you more of that truth serum” Matty says, knowing you needed more painkillers.
You giggle then but you pause when you recognise a familiar smell. You pull out of the hug and say, “Matty the cookies”
Matty immediately smelled the burning batch then too. He rushed his way over to your oven then saying, “Shit shit shit”
~*~*~*~
After the burnt cookies made it out of the oven and you helped him with a normal batch, you spent the day together. Him still looking after you like he did yesterday but this time he was overtly flirting with you all day.
You had to admit that you did love it. The fact he actually liked you back was something you were still a little shocked by but by the time you were sitting down eating your lunch together you’d talked through things a lot.
Matty had told you that he wanted to take you out later to a bar for some quiet drinks, and he said he had every intention of kissing you when he brought you back. You tried not to show how that made you feel bit Matty knew how you hid things so when he cupped your cheeks and felt how hot they were he teased you about being silently on board with the idea.
But the more you thought about actually going out with him, the more you wished it didn’t happen whilst you had a head injury. The last thing you wanted was to go out to a bar and have noisy people around you.
Matty himself was a handful sometimes and if you were honest you didn’t really want to get yourself ready to go out in public. You’d rather just stay in with the man himself.
So you thought you’d ask if he’d put a pin in the idea for now.
“Matty” You say once you come back into the lounge. As you sit yourself down on the settee beside him you ask, “You know how you said you’d get on your knees and ask me out later?”
Matty gives you a little playful grin then and answers, “Yeah?”
“Can you do that maybe in a day or two?” You ask him a little hesitantly. You also explain, “I still don’t feel all that great and I’d like to enjoy our date when we go out.”
“Thought you’d like me on my knees for you?” Matty teases a bit, shuffling himself a little closer to you.  
You’re both facing each other on the settee now. The side of your heads are resting against the back of the cushioned surface and you’re just smirking at each other.
You run your tongue over your bottom lip as his playful look continues. Despite the teasing remark though, you continue with your honesty.
“I’d probably love it a lot more when I don’t have a splitting headache and I’ve not been crying all morning.” You grin and Matty chuckles a little before resting a hand on your knee.  
“That’s fine” Matty smiles, letting his hand rub your knee soothingly. “What would you like to do instead?”
You quite liked that he didn’t want to leave despite you postponing the date. It gave you more assurance that he was still interested, even though he’d assured you several times now that he was.  
You suggest, “Netflix?”
“And chill?” Matty suggests with a teasing smirk.  
You can’t help but laugh, “We will see.”
The rest of the day surprisingly goes pretty fast. That may have been yours and Matty’s weird thing around each other though because whenever you were together it seemed like time just flew by.
You both went on a walk around the park near where you lived as a way to break up the day. It was a walk filled with Matty now being very cheeky with you and he found every excuse to put his hands on you.
The most memorable time being when you were standing in the queue at the little cafe that was there so you could get yourselves a sandwich. His arms had snaked around your waist from behind and he pulled you into him for everyone to see.
His touchiness didn’t even die down when you got to the lady who was serving. If anything he was even more attentive to you as he called you ‘Darling’ and ‘Babe’ when he was asking what food and drink you wanted.
The lady serving you seemed amused by your first ‘lovers quarrel’ over who was paying for what. Something which Matty ended up doing because he wasn’t taking no for an answer. You’d be sure to buy him something at some point to make up for it though.
But before either of you knew it you were curled up together on your settee with the lights on low as you watched your films. They weren’t anything intense, they were just shitty comedies like Zoolander and Step Brothers. Just films that you could chat over but then also pay attention to if you wanted a break from the chatting.
You don’t really know how you got into the position but in this moment in time you were curled up against Matty with your legs over his and he had his head on your shoulder as you watched the film. It was needless to say you felt so much better than you did this morning.
Maybe you should have been honest from the get go and you could have been experiencing this for a lot longer. You certainly looked forward to the cute innocent cuddles you’d have in the future as Matty had made it clear he was interested.
You must have got lost in your head for a moment though, because Matty’s lips gently meeting your neck was something that brought you straight back to reality. It was just a gentle peck which made you smile towards the TV and you just carried on playing with his hair like he’d not done anything.
But then he did it again for a little longer and then again a little bit higher up your neck. It was only when Matty carried on his little adventure that your fingers laced into his hair to encourage him.
You felt him grin into your neck then and he slowly worked his way up your neck like a teenager exploring that section of skin for the first time. You of course tilted your head to the side to give him more room and you both had a little giggle at that both being fully aware of what the other was doing.
When Matty started nipping on your neck you let your eyes close to bask in the sensations he was bringing to you. You felt like it was ten times better than what anyone else had done before, but maybe that was because you really fancied him.
Whatever the reason though, you didn’t want his lips to stop. And thankfully they didn’t.
Matty teased your neck until he was itching to kiss your lips. So much so that he silently pleaded to himself that you’d let him now your tears had long dried up.
“Can I please kiss you properly now?” Matty asks against your neck after another minute of the sweet torture.
You pull on his hair so his lips detached from your neck and when he looked up at you and his sweet brown eyes met yours. You nodded a, “Yes please”
And Matty didn’t need to be told twice.
Matty’s pillowy lips meet yours and you instantly melt. The nervousness that you felt building before every first kiss you’d ever had was gone and you let yourself enjoy it.
For Matty it was everything he hoped it would be. Your soft lips meeting for kisses every single time and when you brought your hand up to cup his face it was indication that you liked it enough for it to continue.
Your lips moved against each other’s almost cautiously as you both softly go in for the kisses you’d been starving yourselves of all day. Even though they were sweet and innocent, you couldn’t help your heart beating erratically in your chest.
You think it meant more to you because you liked him and have done for a while. Kisses like this weren’t the same as the ones you get when you were after a quick pull at a club. These meant something and the fact you were both gentle and almost hesitant with them proved that.
After a minute you both pull away, Matty pressing his forehead against yours so you could feel his curls tickle your face but you didn’t mind in the slightest. Your hands had chosen to cup his cheek and his neck so you really weren’t that fussed about his curls, if anything you welcomed them now you knew he didn’t mind you being close.
In this pause to catch your breaths you never really lost, Matty decided to tell you with a grin, “You’ll be pleased to know I definitely like you”
You giggle at that and let your fingers lace back into his curls before saying, “You’re a cheesy fucker” before you pull him in to meet your lips again.
It was less hesitant from both of you this time as the joke caused you both to smile into it a little. But it gets a little more forward after that.
They were more confident kisses this time which was slowly setting your skin on fire. And you both got that into them that the next time you knew what was going on you were leaning backwards with Matty’s lips still meeting yours meaning he was slowly trapping you between him and the settee.
Thankfully there were definitely worse places to be trapped. You would choose this form of imprisonment every time.
When Matty deepened the kiss it caused the both of you to whimper a bit. Mostly because of the way you pulled on his curls to encourage it and the fact that Matty’s hand had found your hip and he held you against him tightly.
The kisses only got braver from then on. Both of you now fully getting off on your settee with absolutely no intention of stopping anytime soon.
The only time you pause is when it’s getting a little intense for you because the lump on the back of your head was pressed into the harder part of the arm of the settee. So the next time Matty’s lips trail down your neck to allow you both to get some air, you let him know in your own sarcastic way.
“Matty” You half whine, loving the way he was kissing your neck now.
“Yes baby?” Matty asks and the pet name causes your stomach to flip. Hearing that fall from his lips in the position you were both in definitely felt good.
“I know I'm a good kisser and everything so it's not a shock I’m clouding your mind, but I had a head injury yesterday and you kissing me the way you are is pushing my head into the settee and it’s starting to hurt again.” You ramble honestly keeping your fingers tightly laced into his curls.
Matty chuckles into your neck then before placing one last kiss there for now. He then leans up and pecks your lips once more.
“Sorry baby” Matty says, pulling you up into a different position. You're straddling his hips then and Matty leans back against the settee with a grin plastered onto his lips, “This better for you?”
“Cocky little shit, aren’t you?” You laugh shaking your head at him.
Matty laughs too but he backchats, “Says you… You’re the one that just said your kisses were that good they left me with no memory”
“Well” You grin, pecking his lips teasingly once more before saying, “I’m speaking from experience”
“Come here” Matty says shaking his head, pulling you back down to him with the hand that cups your neck and you note a playful grin on his lips, “We will see whos mind goes foggy”
You end up kissing him like that for a long while just enjoying this new dynamic with each other. You had to admit to yourself that he was a really good kisser, but that shouldn’t really have surprised you, his tongue was out a lot in the Love Me video and he had it out half the time when he teased the crowd when he was on stage.
He definitely knew how to use it.
After the both of you calmed yourselves down, you cuddled yourselves up against each other much like earlier on as you carried on watching another shitty comedy. You watched them into the night again and you only noticed you half dozed off when you felt a soft kiss being pressed to your neck again.
“Matty” You murmur after feeling another lone tired kiss against the skin on your neck.
He must pick up on what you’re about to suggest because he asks, “Can I stay again?”
You nod and say, “Course”
You wanted to kiss and cuddle him for a lot longer than you already had been doing.
“Let’s go to bed, love” Matty says, picking his head up out of your neck and pecks your lips once more.
It leaves a warm feeling in your chest as you turn everything off downstairs before heading to bed.
When you get up to your room Matty’s arm travels around your waist and he hugs you into him. You lean back against him and smile at the feeling of his curls against your skin as he nuzzles himself into your neck again.
“You smell really good” He tells you before placing a kiss to the place where your neck meets your shoulder.
You grin at that, “Thanks, I think it’s just you though. All I can smell is your aftershave”
“Don’t feed the narcissism Darling” Matty spins you around then, “Take the compliment.”
You giggle before you kiss him again, this time with no hesitation at all. Your fingers lace into his curly locks and you pull on it hungrily to keep him close as he continues to walk you back into your bedroom.  
They are just playful kisses coming from the both of you. Nothing too intense at all.
You like the feeling of Matty’s arms wrapped around your lower back pulling you into his body. You like the fact that he wanted you close, because you wanted him just the same.
You both pull away giggling a little when Matty almost trips the both of you over from moving towards your bed a little too fast. But thankfully it just ends in a playful, “Need to slow down. I’d feel bad if I gave you another concussion”
“I get it… I’ve wanted to kiss you for ages
“Well you can kiss me whenever you want” Matty grins pulling you down to straddle his lap which you do.  
“Good to know” You giggle before kissing his pillowy lips again.
After a few more kisses, you’re both very aware of the tiredness creeping its way into your systems despite the new sensations you’re both getting from your lips attacking the others.
“Y/N/N, Darling, you’ve got my joggers on” Matty grins knowing that they are what you gave him to wear last night.
You grin, “You’re right” and then you get up off his lap and grab yourself some new pyjamas from your drawer.
“I can only apologise mister Healy” You say with a smirk as you push them down your legs and step out of them.
Matty wasn’t exactly expecting you to strip in front of him tonight but the fact your gorgeous legs were on display to him for a minute he didn’t stop himself from looking. Your very oversized hoodie now acts as a dress as it hides your underwear from his gaze.
Matty just couldn't take his eyes away from your legs though. He didn’t think he’d ever seen you in a skirt or a dress so actually seeing you in front of him like that just led to new thoughts circling his mind. Or his mind was until you hastily picked them up and launched the scrunched up joggers at his head.
“Ey” Matty called back playfully, holding the joggers in his hands now.
You point to your eyes and silently tell him that is where they are with a knowing grin on your lips. Matty can only press his lips together as an apology before you head to your bathroom to change again like you did the night before.
He didn’t need to get everything on the first day.
After changing and doing your nightly routine you come back to your bedroom to find Matty changed into your joggers and no top like last night and you don’t shy your eyes away from his tattoos this time when he walks past you to use the bathroom himself. Matty catches you looking but he doesn’t comment on it and at this point you don’t really care.
When he gets in bed beside you and he pulls you in to cuddle him you bring him out of his thoughts, “Can I ask you a personal question?”
“Course” Matty says, not having anything to hide from you. Especially if you were going to work out in the end, and he had every intention of you both working out.  
“Do you really not try? Because I always thought you would be the opposite” You ask him curiously, more truths spilling from your lips thanks to your meds.  
Matty asks curiously, “Not try what?” brushing your hair behind your ear so he could see your cute face.
But pout, a little embarrassed, “Don’t make me say it.”
“I genuinely don’t know what you’re talking about.” Matty chuckles, looking at how shy you’d all of a sudden become.  
“In your song yesterday.” You say and it brings Matty a bit more clarity on what you were asking, “You said you lied and you’d never fucked in a car”
Matty grins knowing exactly what you were asking now, but he teases, “So what’s your question?”
“You know my question, why are you making me say it?” You chuckle, getting more flustered with each passing second.
Matty leans down and pecks your lips once before he tells you, “Because you’re cute when you get embarrassed.”
You sigh and whine into his neck, needing to hide when you ask, “Do you actually just lie down and not try?”
“See” Matty chuckles, “Wasn’t that hard to say, was it?”
“Just answer my question.” You whine embarrassed that your stupid fucking meds just let you ask anything under the sun.
“Why don’t you just wait and find out?” Matty giggles, pulling your out of his neck a little bit.
He found it very cute that that was the only thing you got out of his song when you were drugged up the previous day. At least you’d told him you liked it though.  
“Because I’m nervous now. I thought you’d be the opposite.” You say honestly, “And after earlier I’m confused”
“Why are you nervous?” Matty asks looking into your gorgeous Y/E/C eyes, wanting you to feel comfortable with him, “We aren’t doing anything right now.”
“I know.” You say, and then shrug, “Guess you just spoil my fantasies by saying you haven’t fucked in a car.”
“We can fuck in a car if you like?” Matty teasingly offers before leaning in to kiss you again. He mumbles against your lips, “It won’t be a fantasy then.”
You giggle at that but don’t hesitate to kiss him back. When he pulls away you keep him close and as your nose brushes against his, you suggest, “One step at a time, ey?”
Matty loves the little eskimo kiss you’re giving him enough to carry it on for a few more seconds after he nods in response to your suggestion. God you were so cute, he was very lucky that you liked him.
“Can I keep you on these drugs?” Matty questions, “They make you very truthful.”
You roll your eyes when he says, “Quite like you complimenting me and asking me questions you wouldn’t usually. It feeds the ego more.”
You giggle at that.
“Don’t really have much to hide from you anymore.” You tell him truthfully.
Matty wants a little confirmation, surprised by you saying that, “No?”
“Nope” You grin.
“I’m quite glad you like me Darling” Matty says, tucking a loose piece of hair behind your ear.
“I’m glad you like me back Hun” You grin and kiss him again.
The sweet kiss lasts for a couple of seconds before Matty pulls away so you’re both cuddled against each other again now. You definitely liked being close to him and you were glad he was the cuddly type.
But then he makes a joke that makes you playfully smack his chest as you giggle. Of course, your Matty jokes, “Can’t wait to tell our kids you asked me to fuck you and then fainted”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
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terrific-togekiss · 4 years
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What if there was a Walt Disney Fighting Game? [Video Game Concept]
Note: I am well aware, that Disney would probably never say yes in a million years to this idea. Taking their beloved, child friendly characters and having them fight?!
OH THE HORROR?!
I am also aware there have been concepts for this in the past.
Final Fantasy Dissidia was supposed to be a Kingdom Hearts fighting game, but Nomura felt uncomfortable portraying Disney characters in such a violent atmosphere.
And there are sketches of what a Walt Disney fighting game could've been, inspired by Super Smash Bros, before it was canceled. It would've focused on more violent characters such as Gaston, Beast, Ursula, Captain Hook, Captain Silver and the Horned King. But the idea was dropped.
Here's the link.
This entire post is just building and putting together what a Disney fighting game would look like to me, if one came out in today's world. It's all merely speculation and ideas that's been in the back of my head for awhile.
(Special thanks to @mayflower-gal for helping me set this up. 😁)
Anyways, let's get started!
Part 1: The Plot
For the plot, I believe it would have to be something simple, since this an idea for a first game. It's the start of a potentially huge franchise, so I wanna keep it not only simple, but an aspect that helps kick off the potential series. And pull in many fans, old and new of Disney.
Let's take into account one thing: what's a recurring theme across various Disney movies (and overall media)?
Is it the lovable, comic relief sidekick that makes audiences laugh? Is it the songs that kids find themselves singing, long after the tale is done and the curtain has closed? Is it perhaps, the clever celebrity choices for important side characters?
No, It's the one defining aspect that draws in audiences, both new and old, bringing you to fall in love with the characters as the story is told:
Wishes.
Pinocchio wishes to be a real boy. Beast and all his servants wish to be human again. Tiana wishes to have her own restaurant. Ariel wishes to see the world beyond the sea.
Everyone wishes for something more in their life and have dreams that they wish come true.
What if all those wishes were counted? Collected?
Watched over. Much like a parent to their children. Or a teacher to their students.
Found engaging. Found entertaining. Found comforting. Found peaceful. Found introspective.
Looked at with childlike wonder and glee when accomplished.
But frowned on when those wish for selfish desires. And an even deeper disappointment at those very same inhuman desires, coming true.
Good and bad exists inside every person, it's just a matter of what one chooses to act on and stand by at the end of the day.
What someone wishes for is reflective of that.
Now imagine that same being coming to life and wrecking havoc across the Disney universe. Judging for themself, if any of these colorful, imaginative characters, truly deserve their...
Happily,
Ever
After.
Yep, the main plot of the story mode is all the various Disney characters literally fighting for wishes and dreams to come true...
against the LITERAL embodiment of wishing upon a star.
Each playable character having their own unique ending.
Some endings being repeats of your favorite Disney movies, with some minor changes to acknowledge the game's plot. While others are original due to the wide cast of characters that are available, besides your favorite Disney Heroes.
For example, you beat the story mode as say, Pinocchio, he wishes to be a real boy.
I know it sounds very redundant since a majority of these things already happen in the Disney movies, but I feel as though relieving them would be fun. In addition to some original ones that didn't happen with either the villains or less major characters.
It's only the hypothetical first game and I wanted start with something simple, that fans could easily get into. More complex plots, with more character interactions should be saved for any possible sequels.
Part 2: The Gameplay
The game would be your typical 2D fighting game. You have,
Combos exclusive to every character that requires practice.
Playstyles that make each character feel unique.
Special moves for each character to get the upper hand and the main focus in besting your opponent in 1 VS 1 matches.
Of course, there's dialogue before fights in the character intros. With so many to pick from, it had to be put in somewhere.
It resembles 2D fighting games that you've all no doubt heard of, such as Marvel VS Capcom or Street Fighter.
But what would a Disney fighting game have to offer on the table, in order to survive the overall video game market?
It would have to be something unique and a feature that not only gives it originality, but a chance to stand out with so much creativity and innovation. Practically begging fans for more.
Which is why I present to you: Disney Songs.
Or as this game prompt will call them: Musical Finales.
The highlight of many Disney movies and overall media, the music is what leaves a lasting impression on many audiences. Which is not surprising, since Disney is mostly a musical. At least in terms of most of their films.
With so many iconic songs from throughout the company's history, of course I'll be squeezing them somehow!
Each character has a music meter, that can only be filled up with how the player times and follows the beat of the character they play as. Follow the rhythm and beat of a character, and it will fill up quicker. Get cut off by the opponent and it doesn't fill up.
That beat being the music of the stage each player fights on, by attacking to the music and the same time. Think of it like the Sound Battles mechanic in Mother 3.
Every character has four different kinds of attacks: Neutral, Musical, Wonderful and Special.
Neutral Attacks are normal attacks that are mostly used to set up combos.
Musical Attacks are attacks that deal more impact, when timed with the music of the stage.
Wonderful Attacks can be seen as character oriented attacks, that embody the personality and charm of the character you play as. And can be used to entertain the audience. We'll get into that later.
Special Attacks are unique finisher moves that require a separate meter to be filled up, as with most fighting games.
Now what happens when the music meter is full? A Disney Song starts playing of course!
Say you filled up Cinderella's music meter for example, then "Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo" starts playing, granting some unique abilities for Cinderella.
Each song would grant different outcomes and bonuses for the various characters. They're not Special Attacks, as that's already a separate mechanic already.
For example, "Part of Your World" starts playing if you're playing as Ariel, filling up the stage with water and slowing down the opponent, giving Ariel a chance to either take advantage of that, bump items into them or create big waves of water.
But what happens if BOTH characters trigger the music meter at the same time?!
Well, that's where this gimmick becomes a fight for which song keeps on playing!
Both songs would start playing, both at the same time and volume. Except, both characters have to compete to see which is stronger.
This is done by the two characters fighting, before triggering a rhythm game between the two. Once one is the victor, the other song fades, while the other stays playing. Doubling the duration of that character's Musical Finale.
Another mechanic is the Entertainment Meter. Every level you fight on has one, that determines which fighter the audience likes more. Via Wonderful attacks, you can charm the audience into supporting you more. This activates things like getting healing items or stat boosts in power and speed. Some of your favorite Disney sidekicks even provide aid from the audience!
It's almost like watching a Disney movie live and being able to interact with the story!
Or the battle system in Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door.
I feel as though this is the best way of keeping the game interesting, giving it an identity of its own and still embodying that magic people will grow to love. It can also lead to some entertaining interactions in the background or foreground of a stage, as the music meter also brings in characters that would not be playable, but support playable characters nonetheless. Like Flounder and Sebastian.
Of course, either feature could be turned off if you're not a fan of that sort of thing, but that's a given.
Part 3: The Stages
With many Disney movies pick from, it's no wonder there's plenty of choices to pick from. Since this is the first game, I chose to focus more on the movies. Here's my take.
Steamboat (Mickey Mouse cartoons)
Duckberg (Ducktales)
Spoonerville (A Goofy Movie)
Dwarven Forest (Snow White and the Seven Dwarves)
Wonderland (Alice in Wonderland)
Monstro (Pinocchio)
The Prince's Ball (Cinderella)
Neverland (Peter Pan)
Forbidden Mountains (Sleeping Beauty)
The Coliseum (Hercules)
Andy's Room (Toy Story)
Elsa's Ice Castle (Frozen)
San Fransokyo Institute of Technology (Big Hero 6)
Atlantica (The Little Mermaid)
House of Mouse (House of Mouse)
The West Wing (Beauty and the Beast)
Cave of Wonders (Aladdin)
Pride Rock (The Lion King)
Ant Island (A Bug's Life)
Tamatoa's Trove (Moana)
Hawaii (Lilo and Stitch)
Headquarters (Inside Out)
Mor'du's Ruins (Brave)
Big Ben (The Great Mouse Detective)
Notre Dame (The Hunchback of Notre Dame)
Merlin's Cottage (Sword in the Stone)
Emperor's Palace (Mulan)
The Great Before (Soul)
Todayland (Meet The Robinsons)
Paradise Falls (Up)
Zootopia (Zootopia)
Monsters Inc (Monsters Inc)
Nomanisan Island (The Incredibles)
The Bayou (The Princess and the Frog)
Atlantis (Atlantis: The Lost Empire)
Halloweentown (The Nightmare Before Christmas)
Oakey Oaks (Chicken Little)
Spirit Mountain (Brother Bear)
Sherwood Forest (Robin Hood)
Treasure Planet (Treasure Planet)
Horned King's Castle (The Black Cauldron)
The Secret Lab (The Emperor's New Groove)
Bald Mountain (Fantasia)
The Grid (Tron)
World's End (Pirates of the Caribbean)
Radiator Springs (Cars)
Grandmother Willow's Forest (Pocahontas)
East High School (High School Musical)
The Axiom (WALL-E)
Regent's Park (101 Dalmatians)
New Mushroom Town High School (Onward)
Happily Ever After Castle (Walt Disney Opening)
Part 4: The Roster
The bread and butter of many fighting games, the roster is no doubt one I had a bit of trouble putting together. With so many characters from over the years, it's no surprise. But since this is the outline of a possible first game, here's my interpretation.
Also, the cast is big to avoid being too barren or dull.
And because I had a lot of fun putting it all together.
Mickey Mouse (Mickey Mouse): The all around character of the game, he mostly fights by a series of cartoonish tricks, magic tricks and his paintbrush from Epic Mickey. His Special Attack would have him break the fourth wall like and rewind the fight like an old film projector in reverse. Except he heals, while the opponent receives twice the damage. His Musical Finale "Sorcerer's Apprentice" has him use Yensid's Sorcerer hat to its fullest and give his overall moveset more flashes to distract the opponent and slow them down.
Donald Duck (Donald Duck): Everyone's favorite, greedy mallard and the world's angriest duck. Donald would fight mainly with toon force, his fists, his bad luck and his anger. The more damage he takes, the angrier he gets. His Special Attack would have him don the Duck Avenger persona from his PK days and use a series of superhero gadgets to finish the opponent. His Musical Finale "The Three Caballeros" trades his anger for Jose Carioca and Panchito Pistoles showing up, making him happy. As they hurt the opponent, each time they hit Donald, to keep him happy.
Goofy (Goofy): Everyone's favorite Disney dad, Goofy joins the fight as not the brightest but with the biggest heart. He has toon force to aid him in some unconventional ways. His Special Attack would have him become Super Goof from his older days. His Musical Finale "Eye To Eye" would restore health everytime he dodges an attack, with a dancing flair to it.
Snow White (Snow White and the Seven Dwarves): The first Disney Princess, Snow White makes her debut and she's not alone. The Seven Dwarves direct most of her attacks, such as tossing rocks, mining tools as weapons and even just grabbing the opponent and tossing them. Snow White herself can sing and command woodland animals to tie up opponents or just fight to defend her. Her Special Attack would have the Dwarves try to roll a boulder, only for lightning to strike on the opponent and the boulder as extra damage. Her Musical Finale "Whistle While You Work" will call on a huge number of forest animals, as they tidy up the stage and Snow White, slowly replenishing her health and slowing down the opponent.
Pinocchio (Pinocchio): Don't lie in his presence, as that nose is not only for show. Pinocchio fights mostly by using his nose as a staff, the Blue Fairy bringing other toys to life to aid him and Jiminy Cricket distracting the opponent with music. Pinocchio's Special Attack would have him wish upon a star and turn himself into a real boy, as the opponent is turned into a puppet and loses damage as a result. Pinocchio's Musical Finale "I've Got No Strings" would cover the stage in thin lines used for puppets: if the opponent touches one, their frozen briefly. If a projectile attack hits, the same happens.
Cinderella (Cinderella): The bell of the ball and someone whom never gives up on kindness, Cinderella will use the dance moves she showed off at the ball for her moveset, having a dancing and musical feel to how she plays and flashy dances to win against the the opponent. With her Fairy Godmother using her magic to help her, such as flashes of light. Her Special Attack would have the clock strike midnight and she leaves behind her glass slipper: once the opponent touches it they get weighed down by a giant magic dress. Cinderella's Musical Finale "Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo" would have the Fairy Godmother cast a series of spells over the stage, as a new carriage pops up every time Cinderella pulls off a combo. The carriages run over the opponent and can even carry Cinderella to safety.
Peter Pan (Peter Pan): Leader of the Lost Boys and Captain Hook's second biggest pain in the butt, Peter Pan and Tinkerbell are here. Peter Pan has a pocket knife with him and Tinker Bell's pixie dust for aerial attacks. His Special Attack would have him toss a bunch of gold on the opponent, as the rest of the Lost Boys tackles them and beats them up for the treasures. His Musical Finale "You Can Fly" would create a trail of pixie dust behind him, that randomly causes the opponent to either jump too high or too low.
Captain Hook (Peter Pan): Keep all 'ticks' and 'tocks' away from this pirate! Captain Hook has a wide array of hooks to switch between, a flintlock pistol and his sword to win the battle. His Special Attack would have him run away from the Tick-Tock the Crocodile, as said crocodile attacks the opponent instead of Hook. His Musical Finale "A Pirate's Life/Elegant Captain Hook" would call his ship the Jolly Rodger onto the stage, as the pirates on the ship occasionally throw knives at the opponent and shoot at them, everytime Hook is caught in a combo and can't escape.
Aurora (Sleeping Beauty): Aurora, sleeping beauty herself, is doing anything but sleep and her guardians are making sure of that! Her attacks has the Good Fairies use their magic in numerous ways, such as moving objects, animating objects and even petrification. Her Special Attack has Prince Philip show up with the Sword of Truth and the Shield of Virtue, to deal heavy damage on the opponent. Her Musical Finale "Once Upon A Dream" boosts her stats everytime she's hit.
Maleficent (Sleeping Beauty): The Mistress of all Evil, Maleficent uses a wide array of magic powers from cursed, throny vines, to her iconic green fires, she's one tough fighter from a distance. Her Special Attack would have her turn into a dragon and breath fire down on the opponent. Her Musical Finale "Once Upon A Dream" would have her make the opponent more drowsy, each time they hit her, until falling asleep, unless they keep moving.
Robin Hood (Robin Hood): The sly fox of England and one talented theif, this fox focuses on disguises, archery, swordsmanship and woodsmanship to make his way. His Special Attack would have authorities show up to arrest him, as they rain down arrows on the opponent in the process. His Musical Finale "Running Through The Forest" would allow him to dodge all attacks, without needing to hit the controls or input buttons.
Basil of Baker Street (The Great Mouse Detective): World's greatest detective! At least in the mouse world that is. Basil would investigate the stage of the fight, much like a crime scene and even pick up clues that double as weapons, such as a propeller or a mouse trap. His Special Attack would have him investigate a crime scene that hurt the opponent, before pushing them aside as 'worthless' evidence. His Musical Finale "Let Me Be Good To You" would have him require no further evidence and counter each hit with a deduction on his opponent's crime and even stop them from performing combos. Doing damage in the process.
Professor Ratigan (The Great Mouse Detective): Never call him a rat. Ever. This crime boss of the miniature crime world be no stranger to fist fights and gleefully take a swing at your demise, whether it's his fists, cane or traps. If not him, then his minions are more than happy to drown some orphans! His Special Attack would have him call his pet cat, Felicia to devour the opponent. His Musical Finale "The World's Greatest Criminal Mind" would give him more durability to hits, more destruction to the stage and traps cover more range on the stage.
Ariel (The Little Mermaid): Princess of the Sea, everyone's favorite mermaid is ready to explore beyond the sea. Armed with her father's trident, some amazing swimming skills and various sea animals at her command, she's more than ready. Her Special Attack would have her conjure a giant wave, that also covers the opponent in sea creatures. Her Musical Finale "Part Of Your World" fills the stage with water and can have Ariel bump floating objects into the opponent.
Ursula (The Little Mermaid): The last sea witch you would want to cross paths with, Ursula has eels to do her biding, poisonous ink clouds and even thunderclouds. Her Special Attack would have her turn giant via King Triton's trident and use the added power to attack the opponent. Her Musical Finale "Poor Unfortunate Souls" has her disguise herself as the opponent and slowly regain health from all souls being eaten by her. As a bonus, if she's infront of a mirror that's on the stage, her reflection will be her true form.
Belle (Beauty and the Beast): My, quite an odd girl, reading books and getting on the field of battle?! Belle's entire moveset would revolve around books; not magic books, just books on the rest of the cast and fairytales overall. She would be able to switch between each of these books and use what she's learned from them. For Example, 'Romeo and Juliet' gives Belle immunity to stat changes and rose themed weapons that hurt the opponent, like throwing weapons. 'Aladdin' gives her a magic ring that can conjure up magic smoke, furniture on the foe and teleport her. 'Jack and the Beanstalk' plants vines that can raise her up or entangle the foe. There's more books at her disposal, but that's just the general idea. Her Special Attack has her father ride in on his invention, chopping up an entire forest until the opponent is covered and crushed by chopped up logs. Her Musical Finale "Tale As Old As Time" gives her the power to 'skip' a fairytale, turning each of her attacks into the endings from the books. For example, 'Aladdin' would trap the opponent in an oil lamp, leaving room for her to attack.
Beast (Beauty and the Beast): The poor and cruel prince, turned into a monster as evil as the one in his heart. Beast has his boost in strength from his beastly form and claws to defeat the opponent. The curse not only affected him: his servants are by his side. Lumiere can incinerate the opponent or plant fires on the ground, Cogsworth can distract them with timed clock sounds, Mrs. Potts can spill tea to slip up the opponent, Chip will knock over bookshelves and Wardrobe can block attacks. His Special Attack would turn the opponent into a piece of furniture, leaving them open for attacks: each opponent having a different transformation. His Musical Finale "Be Our Guest" would have every attack with one of his servants, also heal Beast in addition to hurting the opponent.
Gaston (Beauty and the Beast): Nooo oooone's slick as Gaston! Quick as Gaston! No one's neck is as incredibly thick as Gaston! He's especially good at combo breaking! Boy what a guy that Gaston! Gaston has his inconic blunderbass and his fists, along with a bow and quiver and a hunting knife to deal with an opponent, almost as if they were an animal he's hunting. His Special Attack would have an angry mob charge at the opponent and beat them up. His Musical Finale "Gaston" gives him a strength boost, everytime he pulls off a combo successfully.
Aladdin (Aladdin): Everyone's favorite street rat and theif, he's not alone on the field of battle as Abu and Genie are here to help him. Abu can cling to the opponent and hit them repeatedly, Magic Carpet can be used for aerial attacks, Aladdin has a sword that he 'borrowed' from a guard and Genie can shape-shift in a variety of ways to best the opponent. Aladdin's Special Attack would have Genie distract the opponent, as Aladdin steals something off them and uses it to beat them. Aladdin's Music Finale "Friend Like Me" would have Genie grant a wish, each time Aladdin gets a combo, such as a stat boosts and healing.
Jasmine (Aladdin): The sultan's own daughter that would rather be anything than a prize to be given away. She has learned self defense skills, her father's guards and her pet tiger Rajah in her moveset. Her Special Attack would have the guards arrest the opponent and toss them into prison, as they struggle to escape and take damage. Her Musical Finale "A Whole New World" has one the Seven Wonders of the world occasionally pop up in the background to hurt the opponent, as the fight goes on.
Jafar (Aladdin): The Sultan's Royal vizer of Agrabah and one whom believes he should rule Agrabah. Jafar has his magic staff to hypnotize and cast spells onto his foe. Occasionally tapping into the phenenomal, Cosmic power of his Genie form to do some real damage. And Iago is here as well... mostly to complain. His Special Attack would have him become an all powerful Genie and Iago wishing for ways to 'hurt' (not kill) the opponent. His Musical Finale "You're Only Second Rate" would boost all of his stats and attacks, except he can't KO the opponent until the Musical Finale is done.
Simba (The Lion King): King of the Pride Rock and son of Mufasa, the Lion King himself is more than prepared with his claws and iconic roar. His roar can even control the weather to strike lightning and cause windstorms. His Special Attack would have him call on the spirit of his father, Mufasa, as the two of them roar at the opponent. His Musical Finale "Circle Of Life" will have him remember, how we are all connected and draw on the life-force of nature, slowly healing him and giving his roars more range.
Scar (The Lion King): Mufasa's little brother and King after his timely demise, Scar has his claws and his hyenas to make short work of his foe as if their nothing more than a light snack. His Special Attack would toss the opponent of a cliff, into a Wildebeest stampede just like in the movie. As a bonus, he would say 'long live the king's son' if Simba is the opponent. His Musical Finale "Be Prepared" has him do damage without needing to attack the opponent and just walking into the opponent.
Pocahontas (Pocahontas): Daughter of Chief Powhatan, this Disney Princess has the skills necessary in order to survive and win. Her Special Attack would have her people come in to fight alongside her and best the opponent. Her Musical Finale "Colors Of The Wind" gives her attacks more launching power and each dodge she does generates winds that hurt the foe.
Governor John Ratcliffe (Pocahontas): The main villain of Pocahontas, this greedy scoundrel will do anything to claim what he believes is rightfully his. He has a sword and uses his position of power to call his men into the fray. His Special Attack would have his men charge like in the movie at the opponent. His Musical Finale "Mine, Mine, Mine" prevents the opponent from interrupting his attacks and tripping over any gold sticking out of the ground.
Quasimodo (The Hunchback Of Notre Dame): The hunchback of notre Dame himself and quite the sweetheart, he just wishes to see the outside world. His job as the ringer of the bells comes in handy to stun them, swing bells at them, his talented acrobatic skills and surprising strength. His Special Attack would have him reenact the Festival of Fools and have the opponent be caught up in all the chaos. His Musical Finale "Out There" turns all of his bell attacks, into soothing sounds, that heals him.
Esmeralda (The Hunchback Of Notre Dame): An outcasts, like many other outcasts of Notre Dame, she's picked up on a multitude of tricks to evade capture. Such as illusionary tricks to trick opponents and various circus acts from the Festival of Fools. Her Special Attack has Phoebus teleport out of a field of smoke and beat the opponent. Her Musical Finale "God Help The Outcasts" plants multiple pillars of light over the stage, that burn the opponent and heal Esmeralda.
Judge Claude Frollo (The Hunchback Of Notre Dame): Someone whom believes only he can purge the world of evil and that all he does is for the greater good. Frollo, due to his old age mostly uses his sword, his horse and his 'fears' to end the opponent. Those 'fears' being cloaked figures that defend Frollo and burn the sins of his opponent. His Special Attack burns the stage, with the opponent caught up in the flames being tied to a stake. His Musical Finale "Hellfire" burns the opponent every time they hit and touch Frollo.
Arthur (Sword in the Stone): The rightful king of England, proven by pulling the sword in the stone, Arthur is ready to be king. Merlin's apprentice is armed with the sword of legend: Excalibur and his mentor Merlin is there to provide some magic aid by turning Arthur into various animals and predict the opponents attacks with foresight. Arthur's Special Attack has Merlin turn into a germ to infect the opponent. Arthur's Musical Finale "Higitus Figitus" grants Arthur increased weight, almost as if he's the sword in the stone and making him harder to launch and knock away.
Hercules (Hercules): The son of the Greek God Zeus, Hercules goes to prove himself as a true hero and this brawl may be his greatest trial yet. With his power as a Greek God, granting him immeasurable strength, agility and endurance. And his pet Pegasus shows up for aerial attacks. His Special Attack has his father Zeus come in and hurl his thunderbolt at the opponent. His Musical Finale "Zero To Hero" increases his durability each time he pulls off a combo, making him immune to attacks at times.
Hades (Hercules): Greek God of the underworld and lord of the dead, Hades will claim victory. In addition to mastery of fire and smoke, Hades can shift between generally calm and collected, to angered and enraged, which affects the range and power of his attacks. Pain and Panic also shapeshift to provide some help. His Special Attack has the Titans show up and attack the opponent. His Musical Finale "My Town" floods the stage withdead souls that slowly deplete the health of the opponent.
Mr. Incredible (The Incredibles): One of the greatest superheroes whom ever lived, in spite of an unneeded early retirement from the government. Robert "Bob" Parr, known to the public as Mr. Incredible, has his moveset revolve around his superstrength and invulnerability, also being able to use the environment to his advantage like uprooting trees. His Special Attack calls in the rest of The Incredibles; Dash, Violet, Elastigirl and Jack-Jack to help take down the opponent as a family. His Musical Finale "The Incredibles" has his attacks all release shock waves that occasionally make debris hit the opponent, like it's the intensity of a comic book.
Syndrome (The Incredibles): You better catch him while be monologues as he does not play around! The wannabe superhero uses zero point energy to toss the opponent and send objects flying their way. His Special Attack calls in the Omnidroid to make short work of the opponent. His Musical Finale "Kronos Unveiled" forces the opponent to not stand still for too long or repeat the same attacks, or else the Omnidroid will fire lasers at them almost as if their being analyzed.
Mulan (Mulan): From lying to save her father's life, to saving all of China to joining other famous Disney heroes on the field of battle, Mulan has been through a lot. She has a sword, fireworks, a staff and a fan to best her foes. Mushu tags along, spitting fireballs at the opponent and tricking them into attacking smoke illusions that resemble Mulan. Her Special Attack has fireworks hit a snowy mountain, crushing the opponent under an avalanche. Her Musical Finale "Reflections" has Mulan disguise herself and blend in a crowd that slowly came onto the battlefield. The opponent attacking a random person will have them retaliate and hurt them.
Jack Skellington (The Nightmare Before Christmas): The pumpkin king and the patron of Halloween, his title comes with a wide array of pumpkin bombs, a flexible and detachable skeleton body. His Special Attack would have him trap the opponent in a series of giant pumpkin bombs, before his pet dog Zero lights them up. His Musical Finale "This Is Halloween" plants a series of tricks and treats all over the stage: treats for Jack that heals him and tricks that leave the opponent in a scared state. They take more damage while scared.
Oogie Boogie (The Nightmare Before Christmas): A literal burlap sack of nothing but bugs, Oogie Boogie has those very same bugs come out and harm the opponent. From spiders that tangle them up, to tarantulas that poison them to flies that hoist them up, he's as gross as sounds. His Special Attack would have him inhale the opponent and let his bugs do the work. His Musical Finale "Oogie Boogie's Song" increases his luck of landing higher damage, by also hitting a dice on the stage.
Tarzan (Tarzan): A man raised by apes, Tarzan has the strength to even keep up with apes and survive in the forest. In addition to his amazing strength, Tarzan can also swing from vines, use his impressive smell and hearing to counter attacks and a spear. His Special Attack has him command an army of apes to beat up the opponent. His Musical Finale "Son Of Man" puts fruits on the trees he swings from that he can heal himself with: since the opponent is not Tarzan the same fruits either poison them or make them dizzy.
Yzma and Kronk (The Emperor's New Groove): The former advisor of Emperor Kuzco and her most loyal henchman. Kronk does the fighting with his astounding strength and Yzma will be in the background, occasionally throwing potions on the opponent. Kronk will pull the lever, that will do a variety of things such as drop a bust of Yzma, a giant rock, a vase, etc. Their Special Attack has Yzma yell 'PULL THE LEVER KRONK!' sending the opponent and Yzma down a trap door to below the stage. Leaving it up to interpretation what happens, as Yzma casually walks back to the stage with a crocodile biting her leg. Their Musical Finale "Snuff Out The Light" replaces Yzma's potions with singing that prevents the health bar from going any lower.
Milo J. Thatch (Atlantis: The Lost Empire): An orphan that grew up to be quite the cartographer to even finding the lost city of Atlantis. Since he's not much of a fighter, the friends he made on the trip will do the fighting for him. Vinny plants explosions, Mole digs holes and attacks from the ground, Sweet heals Milo and boosts his durability, Audrey sends vehicles at the opponent and Cookie leaves food for people to trip over. He's even picked up on some Atlantean magic from Kida. His Special Attack has him pilot an Atlantean cruiser, shooting lasers at the opponent. His Musical Finale "Where The Dream Takes You" reverse the opponents controls, every time Milo lands a hit, almost as if their lost without a map.
Kida Nedakh (Atlantis: The Lost Empire): Princess of Atlantis and the current Queen, Kids is armed with a spear and a connection to the Heart of Atlantis, granting her forcefields and runes that dish out the ancient city's might. Her Special Attack summons a giant tsunami with the opponent being hit as Atlantis sinks. Her Musical Finale "Kida Returns" has the stage covered in runes, as the guardians of Atlantis will hit the opponent if they step on a rune.
Stitch (Lilo and Stitch): Experiment 626, also known as Stitch is an alien that befriended the kind-hearted Lilo Pelaki. Stitch is indestructible, has four plasma blasters, can roll up into a ball and lift up to 3000 times his own weight. His Special Attack calls in his cousins to each hit the opponent once, before Stitch himself smacks them with a car. His Musical Finale "Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride" doubles the strength of any attacks timed with the music.
Captain Jack Sparrow (Pirates of the Caribbean): Captain Jack Sparrow comes to the battle with his signature sword, musket and flintlock pistol. His Special Attack has the Black Pearl ram the opponent and shoot cannonballs at the opponent. His Musical Finale "He's A Pirate" makes him impossible to KO, he can still take damage though.
Sulley and Mike Wazowski (Monsters Inc): The dynamic duo and best friends, Sully and Mike fight with the former scaring the opponent and the latter being pulled from the background, used as a ball to hit opponents. The more combos they land, the more scare is generated as energy: this energy being used to power machines to attack the opponent. Their Special Attack has the stage be overloaded with scare energy, to the point of canisters bouncing all over the stage and hitting the opponent, much like in Monsters University. Their Musical Finale "If I Didn't Have You" makes the opponent laugh each time they hit Sulley, generating energy and leaving them open to attack.
Jim Hawkins (Treasure Planet): Jim Hawkins, someone with the 'makings of greatness' according to Captain Silver has a chance to prove that here. With his solar surfer to pull off some amazing tricks, a knife and a blaster, he can hold his own just fine. His Special Attack would simply be Treasure Planet blowing up, with the opponent caught in the explosion, as he flies away on a ship. His Musical Finale "I'm Still Here" gives him the markings of greatness, in the form of stat boosts everytime he pulls off a trick on his solar surfer.
Captain John Silver (Treasure Planet): The fearsome pirate cyborg and only real father figure to Jim Hawkins, Captain Silver is ready to use those pirate skills from over the years to claim his treasure. As a cyborg, he has a wide selection of tools and weapons, such as lasers, a cybernetic eye, guns, a sword, a cleaver, a battering ram, the list goes on. His Special Attack has the opponent fly into space, while he leaves on a pirate ship. His Musical Finale "I'm Still Here" fills the stage with comets that can freeze the opponent if they come into contact with them and increases the strength of Silver's lasers if they pass through.
Merida (Brave): The Scottish princess and daughter of Queen Elinor and King Fergus, enters the battle with her archery skills and swordsmanship to win the fight. Her Special Attack has her ride in on her horse Angus, delivering a series of arrows to finish off the opponent. Her Musical Finale "Touch The Sky" makes all her arrows hit the opponent, without fail.
Kenai and Koda (Brother Bear): The bear brothers, one born a bear and the other cursed to turn into a bear. Kenai and Koda fight as a team of bears from claws to wilderness skills they picked up. Even the Great Spirits watch over and protect them, by influencing nature to protect the brothers. Their Special Attack has the spirits of Sitka and Koda's mother come in to protect them and deal with the enemy. Their Musical Finale "On My Way" increases the range of their block, with the Great Spirits protecting them.
Tiana and Naveen (The Princess and the Frog): A hardworker that believes the only way you can make it in the world, is through hardwork. Even if that meant kissing a frog. Tiana has a wide assortment of cooking utensils to win. With Naveen distracting them with singing and dancing. They can switch to being frogs, where they use their tongues to tangle up the opponent and hop off lily pads. Their Special Attack has Mama Odie turn the opponent into a series of animals, before sending them away with her Voodoo magic. Their Musical Finale "Almost There" gives Tiana a golden glow that greatly increases the range of their attacks and distracts the opponent with golden glows.
Dr. Facilier (The Princess and the Frog): The Shadow Man himself and one whom turned Naveen into a frog, Dr. Facilier fights with his cane, Voodoo magic, shadows and spell casting. His Special Attack has him pull the opponent into a deal, as their dragged down by the Voodoo Spirits. His Musical Finale "Friends On The Other Side" let's him take a gaze into the opponent's future, turning all of his attacks into counters, if they hit the same time as the opponent's attacks.
Rapunzel (Tangled): The lost princess of the Kingdom of Corona, blessed with magic hair and has quite the efficient frying pan. Her hair can not only heal herself a bit, but can be swung from, tie up the opponent and makes for a surprising whip. Her Special Attack has Flynn and Maximus ride in, with Rapunzel hitching a ride, as the three take down the opponent. Her Musical Finale "I See The Light" fills up the stage with lanterns, that can blind the opponent if they touch any.
Hiro and Baymax (Big Hero 6): The child genius and the helper robot turned fighter have become quite the crime fighting duo, that honor Tadashi's wish of wanting to help people. Baymax does the fighting, with Hiro on his back, such as martial arts, rocket fist, an energy blade and sonic blaster. Their Special Attack calls in the rest of the Big Hero 6, as they teamup and take down the opponent. Their Musical Finale "Immortals" assuming they get the rights to the song has Baymax dodge every attack that comes, without needing to move the controller and slowly heal up.
Judy Hopps (Zootopia): A young bunny from Bunnyburrow that came to Zootopia to pursue her dreams of being cop and help people. Her bunny physiology grants her enhanced hearing, quick agility, high jumping and she has trained herself to take down foes much bigger than her. Her Special Attack has her do her job as a cop and arrest the opponent, with the entire police force joining in to help. Her Musical Finale "Try Everything" plants tourist attractions all over the stage, that can hurt the opponent and heal Judy.
Elsa (Frozen): The Queen of Arendelle and the Ice Queen herself, forced to conceal don't feel, don't let them know. But she'll be doing anything but that here! Elsa has ice powers to freeze the opponent, create pillars of ice, ice slides, ice skates etc. Her Special Attack calls in Marshmallow to deal with the opponent. Her Musical Finale "Let It Go" allows her ice powers to come to life and aid her in battle.
Moana (Moana): Moana of Motuni, whom has sailed the sea to return the Heart of Te Fiti with Maui. She has a harpoon and an oar, along with the ocean helping her and watching over her. Her Special Attack returns the Heart of Te Fiti to Te Fiti, whom fully heals Moana, temporarily boosting her attack. Moana's Musical Finale "How Far I'll Go" covers the stage in water that has boats to hit the opponent and granting Moana faster speed.
Maui (Moana): The Maori Demigod of the wind and sea, with quite the number of feats from over the years. With his magic fish hook, he can shapeshift into a number of animals, his most common being a hawk. His Special Attack being lassoing the sun into the opponent. His Musical Finale "You're Welcome" makes all damage to Maui, take longer to leave an impact.
And that's that. A LOT longer than I thought it would be. Now your probably thinking, what about all the other Disney media? It's an idea for the first game, so other characters (Oswald the Lucky Rabbit, Scrooge McDuck, Goliath, Kim Possible, etc.) would appear in a potential sequel.
Or DLC, since every game these days has it.
Thanks so much for reading all this and taking the time to do! I would love to hear some thoughts and feedback! I had a blast making all this and would like to see if you're interested in hearing more video game ideas.
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queenofallwitches · 3 years
Text
an update and primer:
so the last winter was weird. I had a complete breakdown, went into psychiatric hospital for 40 days in total. two seperate times.
learnt a heap of new things, met a tonne of cool people and had amazing conversations and few fights but overcome my own demons by that.
brain speaking-I have a scarred brain stem and neurological disorder is not a mental diagnosis, but a neurological disorder, proven by MRI scan, ADHD.
also damage to my basal ganglia, and prefrontal cortex.
neurological diagnosis means ADHD is not a "mental" health issue, as some believe, rather a neurodevelopment disorder caused by structural differences in the ADHD brain.
other neurodevelopment disorders include: Tourettes, Autism, Cerebal Palsy, Dyslexia and other Motor and Intellectual Disabilities. (Which recieve, in my view, a lot of insight, media information and stigma reduction by the advocacy networks surrounding these types of disability).
Over the last few years Autism has been over everything, I've seen mainstream media cover Tourettes and yet ADHD is still HUGELY misunderstood, misconceived and misrepresented in media, be in from the angle of documentaries, personal insight of a "typical" case, films, tv, and other media.
one of the first things my dr told me was "in females it rarely presents as hyperactive red-cordial OD child"
which is what my mother BELIEVES, that is because I have an adopted cousin with the ADHD dx who was that growing up, but the representation I'm told is also divergent for women with a higher IQ score than the average IQ. I come in around 142 and tested 123 at age 3 when I was unable to focus, pay attention and had severe trauma. I tested 142 in grade 8.
I'll share my experience as a female who is intellectually gifted, with higher IQ than average, and an adhd brain:
I've been told gifted and talented "genius" children are harder to diagnose because the symptoms present differently, we hide it better (camouflage) and our focusing can be "faked" by mediocre efforts of academic success.. this is true, I would do the assignment the Sunday night hours deadline, last minute, or have my parents half do it for me, plagiarise it (fuck I've killed my whole academic career now) copied but changed my words
from old 1970s encyclopaedias I KNEW they couldn't cross reference (I went through 15 years of school never studying doing homework or assignments and still had top grades).
I literally did not listen, and spent my classes planning the end of the world survival strategies with my GT friend who, basically helped me with my calculus and hard fucking maths, which was the ONLY 50 minutes of the day I put attention into my work.
now I'm going to be heading back to full-time study in the coming months, I get anxious as the pressure of a Bachelor level degree, and the pressure it takes me to perform, is enough to break me down. I've been advised it might be wise to start light (like a basic vet style diploma) and then build up, which is logical, but I keep thinking I'm meant to be doing my thesis by now. which is the kind of pressure one gets as a kid who is told repeatedly, "your intelligence is exceedingly the average and you can do ANYTHING you want"
I wanted to be an astronaut, a storm chaser, and an architect, a town planner and then a journalist. I always held to being a "FBI agent" or spy (I wonder why). so when I found psychology is really a blend of all these things, I kinda found a niche in a psych and social science double degree. but I'm thinking my academic career is LIFELONG, and due to the fact I also want to work in my field alongside my many written thesis coming, I'll be in academics for a long time. I may fail a few things, which I have to come to terms with. I do not fail easily, or readily, but I'm a perfectionist type-a academic who will put my whole life on the line to achieve "merit". I get exams, I get assessments, I read journals super-easy, I talk the talk and walk the walk so well psychologists who are at masters level compliment me on my "knowledge".
when it comes to mental health and trauma, I will always have the personal attachment, called lived experience, which will make failure and burnout, 100 percent realistic. I have to boundary up, bootstraps on, and prepare that yes, my personal "bias" will probably be entwined in this.
which is why I'm looking at the social science for the statistics and thesis writing side of things, and the counselling for the trained therapist side. either way, the degree of counselling requires so much self-insight, and then the social-science will back me away from personifying it. the other choice is criminology, which leads to forensic psychology, which is eternally fascinating. my main concern is the pro-pedophile content Ill be up against, which will look at the anatomy of a shoplifter akin to the devil, and leave the pedophile in the DSM-5 dx "paraphilia" box.
I'm not joining or jumping to anything.
either way I've got 2 year of credit, a heap of pathways and a lot of "academic momentum" from all my life being aimed to be "academic powerhouse". I went through my files and found a lot of awards I'd won in my high school, and top place in the competitions we would be entering in. I remember feeling so sad if I had a "credit" vs a distinction or high distinction, only to see now, a credit in university maths in year 9 is a skillset I don't have anymore so, good on me. or a credit in English, or Science at that age was pretty impressive, considering these tests were random and not studied for.
just a general skills assessment only the top 30 kids in the year were to take on a year by year basis and put out to vet from the top universities and taken by other kids in the same grade around the state.
it puts so much focus on my intelligence, because it's primed to be that way, I know that is true. I know I feel good being academically successful and it gives me a feeling of "achievement" but is it really for me?
I also found 2 letters from my local politicians offering me job placement, work experience and I was 1/4 kids in my 10th grade graduation tom get the letter, and due to my behaviour I pissed ALL the idiots who bullied me off. I was "too pretty to be a nerd" "too smart to be pOpUlAr".
so I made a group of misfits, who are all highly intelligent, creative and my group had the ONLY gay male in the school AND THIS IS BEFORE YOU FUCKING RETARDS MADE IT "COOL". he was bullied badly, so fuck you, you fucks claim "liberalism" but I bet you were the type of idiot who bullied guys like him in high school while you pretended to like my chemical romance and fake cut yourselves. I hate you all, forever.
my grade was full of idiots who were fake emo, who left the scene the moment the scene changed to dub-step and club music. I was there, watching you all, like sonny Moore, went from FFTL to that dubstep skrillex shit he started in 2009.
I dated you, hooked up with you and I went to your gigs. I know who was real and who was fake. I met some of you years later and realised the more emotive ones were the less "alternative appearing".
I can say 1/10000 emo guys from the 00s were genuinely Into the music and scene for the right reasons based on my dating history and this can and will be analysed statistically using SPSS one day to prove a lot. I've had too many relationships from each sub-culture and I have had 4-11 males at a time per public "output" of my energy pursue me over life.
I'm not being cocky when I say I have a long line of "suitors" and its banked back about 50 men. it's been a thing I've avoided as it seems to grow based on my body shape, attitude, appearance, so I am currently out of touch with dating scenes, no interest to try that ANYWAY, given the fact that I have had so many LONG TERM relationships ANYWAY. I can't see another one going well, and at this case, I'm living with an ex but we never went on conventional and now our families label this 3 things: "asexual", "polyamorous" and "open relationship". I'm also "bisexual" but this all to humans outside, looks ridiculous on paper. (wild orgies and lots of swinging or some stupid sex magick probably is what J brother literally thinks we do).
bc humans are intrinsically designed to need to label things they don't understand. we share a lease, not a relationship, and fucking polyamorous, I WISH. there are no girl-girl-guy 3 some, or orgies, or sex magic parties.
this has changed the attitude and perception of this "relation' which Is non-romantic, non-sexual. he can date and likely, will, as can I , and I likely won't date.
I would say 14/15 have had ADHD, or other mental illness and or trauma. which means to me, nothing at all.
I think this "open book" non romantic relationship style of "friends and roommates" not sexual.
attachment is misunderstood by others but works well fro my adhd, meaning I'm not expected to marry, or be a wife in any capacity. he is free to do what he wants, as I am, and open communication is a novel frontier I brought into this in the start, and stayed with for the duration. we fight, but I fight with a lot of people in my life over many petty things. also down to my adhd, I believe, I have rejection sensitive dysphoria, which makes me hypersensitive to rejection, perceived or real.
im not sure if this is trauma or adhd or both. but
I have used sexuality as a weapon in many relationships but it cannot or will not be used here, so I have had to resort to uncovering parts of myself which I never knew, which will stay with me even if he decided to marry and wife up in 5 years, which I'm okay and expecting him to do, and I would much rather that then be trapped in a situation where I cannot be that "wife/mother archetype" as I'm too "femme fatal/other-woman/sex-laced seductress and siren" a "FWB, unicorn, drug buddy, hook-up where im a therapist" or "intellectual and cognitive mind-bender work-study obsessed woman".
both at once and many types of human, including one who is a full-time ceremonial magician of 7 years. I will drink, drug, fuck, fight like males and still be more feminine and high maintenance than 89% of women. I grew up a tomboy and don't mind getting into fun, adventure based situations, like hiking, or anything adrenaline, I would only be reluctant to eat weird shit.
I also have many "neurological" issues including ADHD, and trauma which causes a rupture in the average human and I dating.
I'll tell you how many men have said "you are the unicorn" and then realised what that means, I went as far as canvasing the PUA world back in 2014 after reading the game, a book on PUA, which is essentially, pick up artistry, based on NLP and hypnosis. I did this after reading the copy my ex in 2008 handed me before we dated saying "I gave this up for you". it took me years to open the book, buy when I did I truly believed the only way I would fall in love again, was through PUA. that failed in so many ways but gave me a training foundation for men who were candidates for that, I have trained up J, and the way that sounds is BAD. I know, but I got a lot of value myself, I just don't see it how I wanted to see it.
but that was my original intent, and I achieved this he knows that, knew it was happening and evolved for the best self.
I am thinking we can modulate this into a business model for how I was operating in the BDSM world was mainly psychological, not physical.
I get told all of is incredibly intimidating (I am told) to women and men.
I don't really care anymore, because people have always seen this part of me in the wrong way ANYWAY, but I own who I am NOW. which is what I needed ANYWAY. so it cannot be stolen again, and sexual healing has come from abstinence ironically.
I also don't care what or who is trying to tear up my relations, toxic or not toxic, all people around me will be on a healing journey by default, or cut out of my life, for I am radiating that energy so brightly its impossible NOT to feel that pull.
I will drag your shadows into the light, and make your secrets spin from your lips into my consciousness. its not what I do but its what is design.
I make your weaknesses mountains to climb over. you cannot hide from these in my presence, I won't be this controlling or obsessive female who wants 24-7 attention as I have a life full of meaning without love or sex. I don't want to be wined, dined or expensively gifted, unless specially requested.
I don't want love letters or romantic declarations, this isn't some femnazi bullshit, but it triggers me. I appreciate the efforts and won't make you feel bad about your insecurities, for mine are probably 30 x more pronounced.
I appreciate small things, that most males won't or don't know how to do. like remembering things I've said and being thoughtful. or knowing my silence isn't personal, or a game, but a protective wall. I've had songs sung too me, guitars played, songs written, or things made in ways that are heartfelt. but I've always had them used against me too. so it is the context. I value time, energy, conversations of depth and reciprocal exchange. I also value trauma understanding, my alters and fragments being accepted and valued as me as a whole and a person who is not afraid, or scared of stupid stuff like sensitivity, emotions, feelings as raw as my own. men feel intensely too, lol.
but will only give oral sex 100 times before I don't recieve it, I can communicate now so that wouldn't happen.
but I won't be a bitch about this stuff. I am extremely feminine and care in ways other people, do not, I forget nothing people tell me, so it can be a reward or reverse uno card pull in a fight, but I am not evil or deviant in my relations. I react, depending on how you treat me. I don't need your money, or providing source of income to be okay as I am my own queen, however sharing resources is okay to build something. I don't need to be seduced, but will need to be shown a person is trustworthy.
few cross that.
that will always be time-endurance and testing. there are ground rules I don't play with, or play games. or like being forced or forged into something I'm not. I know abusive and I know safe, and I am a psychology expert, trained psychotherapist and study humans for fun, so I'll always be analysing things.
and I know red flags and I know ego, I know how to placate and please and pleasure, but will only do so, for a bigger and better reason than the mere act of seduction. which is without value and transactional to someone like me, I won't lie.
and I know every tactic in the book, for the book was written by someone like me, many lives ago, and my karma is being burnt for that book.
in terms of walls, I have many, may it be called a maze. or labrnyth.
I will teach you things you never thought you'd know, and change your life in ways you won't ever be able to go back to before. I will blow your mind, sexually, emotionally, intellectually, on all levels, and I'll make your friends and family love me.
I'll bring your walls down and you won't be able to understand this, because you don't understand me, and thats ok.
but I'll always understanding you and make your life better because thats what I do anyway, and people talk to me about things I will never share, as I keep secrets. I am jealous, of everything but, only because I am attached in a disorganised way, and working on that.(I won't even mention how man women or men don't know basic psychology of themselves). I also am a therapist , for my friends and family too.i should not be , but I am. I care, I listen, If you think I'm not listening, I'm still listening. sometimes I interrupt, because I have ADHD and I am horrible at resolute planning, or being "normal". but I don't want to be normal anyway. I need you to recognise and understand my shit, for that is what I do for everyone in my life, and I have helped more than I receive.
I'll probably accidentally give you therapy, but thats fine, because you will uncover your depths and find meaning in this. it's not something that goes bad unless you are fundamentally, evil, even the most abusive relationship I was in, was benefited from this process. yes he's still narcissistic, but he is self-aware. and did I benefit, never, just know the anatomy of self-proclaimed narc and I still can't hate him. will get my civil claim one day.
I will fuck your mind without meaning too. but thats because I fuck my own mind. but the meaning is made in the man- some find this highly offensive or personal (its not). I fuck minds by my own overthinking, or over perception on many levels of reality. so join the ride, or don't come along at all. because once the rollercoaster is in motion, I have no control of what may or may not happen. it's purely experimental.
I am experimental.
and the women who are judging me, are not any better.
look within, and shut the fuck up. self-improve and quit this jealous divide and conquer bitchiness. I HATE gossip, bitches, snitches and fakers.
I look to other women who are intellectually, physically and spiritually "individual". and find value in superior status to my own, which is something my narcissistic ex taught me.
I look for mentors, and teachers and people who will teach me how to improve myself, which I am fearful to reconnect after something is amazing and I can't give anything back of positive value. I am sorry I am working on that.
I won't devalue those below me, but I also need to be mutually benefiting from a relationship.
I dont drag people down, I may disappear if I feel I am doing this by mistake. I am flakey as fuck, and sorry for that. its anxiety and lack of perfectionism, so I am wrong and bad for this. I can change. will change.
if you can find value with my relation, personal professional or romantic, we can move into a symbiotic beneficial agreement based on mutual "terms". but many won't or cannot see this, nor do I impose my bullshit into the lives of randoms at this age.
I don't care if this is cruel, it's real.
I value loyalty, compassion, self-insight/awareness, someone who understands all parts-spirituality, metaphysics while still having intellectual & logical & analytical brain-sight.
I enjoy music, magick and learning new things.
I do not care about appearances I dont think ive dated based on one time. I do value connections and chemistry which is far-few between, I hate fakers. I smell insincerity miles away. but I do respect women who are well-presented, or beautiful, with hair beauty and makeup, I can't do this shit well, so I look up to those who are in professions who do it like art. I find them to be genius level queens who scare me.
I call out bad behaviour and make people uncomfortable if they are repressed. I will change you without even meaning too, I don't even need to date you. its just my presence, over time, amplified by the intensity of the dynamics.
I don't want simplicity, but I also don't need over complexity.
I value passion, independence, creativity, curiosity, problem-solving, deep-disscussions, shared adventures and some occasional risk-taking (lol), sensuality and sexuality for a common cause beyond physical pleasure. I like being taught but not micromanaged. I need my own independence, and need to be trusted with that. I hate being scolded for that like a child, or being pushed to change my ways to conform to societal values. which I will push back and refuse to do. which is not healthy. I don't adult like many others do, but I try to proceed in other ways. and learn to adult like normal people, accept me.
I also value myself, and how I can be celebrated, enhanced and improved vs. the opposite.
I give space, and have boundaries, and understand human psychology, sexuality and relationships in ways few others unless they are trained, can do.
I value MY time. so you can have space to value YOURS. I dont need to be in anyones pocket for a long time. I love being alone, and being around people who are stimulating, but draining people will be drained out of my life quicker than I intend. I am sorry for the people who felt I disappeared, when I was only trying to be 'fair', if I feel I'm a bad influence, I will work on myself until I'm not. I'm still working on it.
I also use this psychology awareness, to enhance communication, connection. you may or may not become an accidental guinea pig. I will be upfront that I am experimental, but that is part of the buy ticket and take the ride. lets work together. not apart.
I am coming from a place of love, and love is what I feel for my animals, which you will be adopting as children.which I want to stop experiments being done on. I love love, in all ways, but hate cruelty of animals and children, violence and suffering. I dont advocate justice, because I find life is fucking cruel, unfair and unjust. by default, so I focus on myself. what can be changed, and what I am able to do in my own locus on control. I will always find myself drawn to the outsiders, the misfits, the vagabonds, the misunderstood. I want to help people who are society, or socially, disadvantaged by trauma and mental illness, but only when I have ability to help myself.
it's a journey.
I will not date anyone who is cruel to animals, outside of specify magical sacrifice, there is not any place for that. nor will I date or fraternise with anything or anyone linked or associated with pedophilia. I won't judge anyone on anything that are outside animal cruelty and pedophilia. I don't and haven't. I keep on good terms with every ex, bar 1 whom I only apologised too this year. it felt good to do that. I change my behaviour.
I am open, but also highly attuned to both logical, factual, empirical , scientific worlds, and spiritual, intuitive, psychic and the "collective unconscious". I walk in both these realms, and I am "conventionally attractive". which puts a lot of pressure on me, to be "stupid". I am always dumbing myself down to fit into normality, but I look ridiculous if I do that so I peacock my intellect.
only to be misconceived.
I give up because I no longer care how anyone but MYSELF can see ME. I won't dumb myself down , but I can enhance you UP. prepare yourself for graded education, evolution and self-growth on mass scales.sorry not sorry.
that sucks for the people who want to be living vicariously through me, for making up to lost trauma years, for family who sold me out for the success I'd bring home, or fake trauma enmeshed friends, or whatever they want or need from me. I value my time and energy, and have given that in abundance, and if you want to be with nut only "one part of me that is alters". I can't provide that now. not sorry.
I have to work on something or not be in a dynamic at all.
I no longer can switch on demand to adapt for you, it will not be effective and that upsets a lot of people. especially now I'm sober. harder to handle this, as I see the world for its ways and why it is, more vividly. I haven't had alcohol for almost 2 months, although, I could drink, I haven't.
I can't do it, anymore. it, being, faking, my selves fronting to impress. I can't. I have no more left to give, and I'm expected by everyone to be a way I can't do it in the way they want.
I will go to another year long outpatient DBT, followed by 10 weeks of A-C-T therapy, and however many ECT OR TMS may or may not help. I'm told it won't (ect) work. but TMS, is something I am open too. but I am telling you, none of this psychotherapy, that will be based on dbt skills, day therapy, intensive skills training, recommencing my studying, and resuming "life worth living" will or can wipe the traumas I've "recovered" memories for.
I will also shut the fuck up, and tell nobody about this if you leave me alone, I told that to my family, and this is open letter to the watchers, stalkers and perps who read this openly as I track the hits on here and have 200+ visits a day every day for the last month. globally. no idea how or who you are but I think its the same people who called the police for the "ayreon song lyrics" seen to be a suicide not last October.
thanks for that wake up call, I have shut the fuck up, since December, more so now. I will burn the journals, or lock them up.
my recovery is not linear, not yet fully integrated and I trust nobody so I don't think my psychotherapy will be deep, I focus on things like ADHD AND my EDNOS. and dbt skills. I won't be talking about sexual traumas.
enjoy the update, and thanks for the "attention".
I have my goals, my work, my meaning and what my life should and could and will look like, but I will not share that with anyone. that means everyone right now.
I've been tested, traumatised and terrorised to the point of not-tolerant of anyone who may bring that back, and banish the fuck out of my sphere every moment I need.
take me as I am, or watch me as I go, which I will go, where I am not wanted I will remove myself, but I will find where I am celebrated because I create that.
I will rise up against all adversity every time but that is survival and that created a resilient and brave woman, in me. who will not be destroyed or decomposed by humans who are fundamentally fucking evil.
I gift you my truth, in progression, and give up the pain of the past.
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teaandwitchery · 3 years
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It had been several years now since Ryou had dueled, which his ranking had reflected as time slipped by. Although it had been an even longer time since he had considered himself a professional duelist back in England, he found his attention being drawn back to the game lately.
This of course concerned the spirit of the ring, who was now separate from his host. Fully resurrected through some ridiculous miracle Pharaoh Atem had been granted which by unfortunate association affected himself as well. And so the nightmare of his existence continued. Of course it did.
And now Ryou was interested in Duel Monsters again, eyeing an upcoming tournament after having been seriously considering registering for the past few days since Kaiba’s latest commercial announced his new tournament.
Bakura-- he’d recovered his own missing memories such as his original name yet opted to continue using his host’s surname instead; after all, why not steal it when he was well known for theft? He’d already taken everything else from this boy over the years-- had never wanted to be involved in another duel after all that had happened in Egypt and in Japan, and he was rightfully aggravated that Ryou wanted to.
“You almost died last time!” he snapped. Violet eyes narrowed, and Bakura asked, “What makes you think something WOULDN’T go WRONG?”
Ryou suppressed a smile. This anger at the prospect of his involvement in a card game… evidenced Bakura cared for him, and this was entirely satisfying. He craved any suggestion that his man could love him. He answered gently, “Nisut Atemu will be there. There haven’t been any more shadow games, but… if something were to happen, I trust him to take care of it.” Ryou looked back to his computer screen, finished the form, and submitted for the tournament. “I’m going. I miss playing.” he remarked then glanced back to Bakura in time to catch the pained jealousy in his gaze. He hated that Ryou was willing to leave his life in Atem’s hands if needed. 
Ryou mused, “I didn’t even get to enjoy Battle City. And I don’t remember um, what was it? What was the other one called? Magic Kingdom? I think it was on an island… Or a lake… There was water. Maybe.”
“Duelist Kingdom.” Bakura mumbled, fresh guilt surging through him for all he’d done to this boy.
Ryou asked curiously, “Did I even start that duel? I’m fairly certain it was with Yugi. Or was it all you? I’ve lived in fragmented dreams for so long. Perhaps I did start that duel before you actively possessed me, I can’t quite recall.”
“I don’t fucking know.” Bakura answered lowly. He didn’t care. He simply wanted that chaos to stay in the past. Why did Ryou need to bring it back into their lives? Their situation had improved so well over the past few months since his and Atem’s return from the Duat… all things considered. There was unfortunately Ryou’s withdrawal from his friends in favor of staying with the thief king. 
Ah, that must be it then. Ryou wanted to duel in an attempt to reconnect with Yugi, Jounouchi, Honda, and Anzu. Why, Bakura couldn’t fathom, obnoxious as they all were but Yugi. Yugi he could understand why Ryou favored. They were quite similar, although Ryou had always been jealous of him.
Although the active possession had not been entirely constant, Bakura had still been aware of Ryou’s interactions at all times, even when the level of focus varied depending on his energy levels and moods. He was perfectly aware of all the feelings that haunted Ryou. The fear he had felt for his friends. The loss and guilt he had experienced when friends from junior high in England had lost their Monster World shadow games. It of course had only gotten worse after that once Bakura had crossed paths with Atem’s host. Ah, Ryou had found such camaraderie in Yugi! He didn’t think he was insane when trying to talk about his experiences with the possession and the shadow games! 
But then the sadness became heavier when he understood how deep and beautiful Yugi and Atem’s bond was. Atem loved him… while Ryou was stuck with a demonic entity who would manipulate him in any way that pleased him and furthered his opportunities for vengeance. It wasn’t fair to have this profound destiny… meant to be the one to host this ancient spirit… only for that spirit to be cruel and reckless.  
“I really like the occult deck we used.” Ryou told him, crossing the room to open a card binder. “I think I’ll change out some of the spells and update it for compatibility with phantom synchro summoning.”
“Synchro what?” Bakura’s anger had mostly subsided. He didn’t entirely want to keep Ryou from his friends… He shouldn’t want to at all as he strived toward being better for him, but there persisted a disdain toward all of the others, even if Ryou did owe Atem his life.
“It’s a way of synchro summoning from the graveyard instead of the extra deck.” Ryou explained, slipping cards out of the pages and setting them aside. His phone illuminated with a notification. “Oh dear, I’m running late!” he exclaimed after a glance to the time. “Would you please make me some tea?” 
Bakura sighed but nonetheless abandoned the bed. “What kind?”
“Any at all, do surprise me!” Ryou smiled, wrapping him in a loving hug before he went to prepare for his work day.
Ryou’s tea collection was immense. Bakura randomly selected a black tea blend after putting the water on. As he waited on it to boil, he crossed his arms over a table and lowered his head, dreading that wretched card game. Not only was the danger apparent to him… but he also would have to subject himself toward Yugi and Company’s stares. If it were only himself, he wouldn’t care what anyone felt or said about him, but Ryou would be hurt by the judgment too. He already had been. They would both be better off in several ways if he kept Ryou from them. And yet… Ryou had already been through so much. He deserved friends.
“There is… something you should know about Ryou I’m not certain you’re aware of.” Atem had told Bakura once he had the chance to approach him alone. A foolish mistake, Atem must have been aware, but the thief king was as exhausted as he was.
“WHAT?” Bakura replied, forcing himself not to ask how dare you speak to me?
Atem stood his ground, determined to deliver the information that would change everything Bakura had ever felt about his host. “He managed to strike a deal… with Zorc… behind your back. That… If you were to fail… He would take your place. He would be bound to the Millennium Ring, and you would be released.”
Bakura’s newly beating heart raced from the revelation. “What? Why would he do that? Why would he do that?! Something that ridiculous? He…” He knew what that curse entailed… forever. So why… Why would he possibly… For ME?
But Atem didn’t have an answer. Not a reasonable one, at least. Who would love a man who had so thoroughly devastated their life and would never give a damn? 
Ryou kept the scar on his arm covered in public, but at home it was a constant reminder to Bakura of the suffering he had inflicted, just as his hand too bore the remnants of the time he impaled Ryou’s hand during a shadow game. Bakura’s eyes fell to the scarred hand when Ryou came to retrieve his tea from him.
“Thank you! You’re the best.” Ryou smiled.
He really wasn’t though. Silently he drank his own tea as he watched Ryou add cream to his, until Bakura broke the silence. “You haven’t told me why you risked everything. For… me. If Atem hadn’t…”
“Oh. Oh, he told you?” Ryou clipped his hair up and pulled his shoes on. “It’s what I was meant to do. I’m the only one who could wield the Ring, right? Anyone else who made the attempt died immediately? It was my destiny to help you. A parallel to Yugi helping Atem.”
“That’s no reason to help someone who would have murdered you, all of your friends, and meant to destroy the world as well. It was your choice. Ultimately your foolish bargain didn’t influence anything, but it was your choice. It was your idea. Why?”
“I love you.” 
Ryou’s response further irritated him. He repeated himself, “WHY?”
“Loving you is my choice too.” Ryou lowered himself onto Bakura’s lap, and the proximity seemed to calm him.
“You’re really weird.” he told Ryou.
“I know.” Ryou embraced him and sighed in delight as Bakura lifted his hands to his shoulder blades, pressing him closer.
For the duration of the time between Zorc’s destruction and Bakura’s resurrection, Ryou had been alone for the first in a very long time. As long as he could remember, the spirit’s presence had remained an inescapable part of his mind. He had spent years wishing for freedom only to find the isolation was entirely maddening. The emptiness was worse than anything Bakura could have done to him. 
Ryou considered himself a skilled necromancer, but no amount of incense or prayers or tears or blood offerings helped him to reach the spirit in those endless, awful nights spent begging for him. He was all Ryou had known; this made being without him the greatest misery… and the one he could not discuss with Yugi, lest he be shamed.
But Marik… Marik he could tell. He never even minded Ryou’s 3 a.m. calls spent sobbing into a glass of wine and confessing his despair.
“I want him back! I can’t live like this!” he’d wept, wondering if this same emptiness was felt by anyone who hadn’t spent their life in a state of possession.
Marik feared for him. “I’ll be there in ten minutes. Okay?” He ended the call, and as he left his apartment, he prayed Ryou wouldn’t think to join Bakura in death instead.
He found Ryou sitting on the floor under his altar table, tarot cards strewn over a blood stained ouija board. A rug was scorched from when a candle had fallen over. Incense smoke curled through the air, and wet eyes looked his way. Marik knelt to help Ryou up and over onto his bed where he lay with him, stroking white hair as Ryou held onto him.
“I’m a worthless spirit worker.” Ryou muttered into Marik’s shoulder.
“No. No, that isn’t it. That isn’t it at all.” Marik’s suspicion of why none of his efforts succeeded in summoning him was far worse.
Thoughts returning to the present, Ryou lifted his face away from Bakura’s neck to grace him with a gentle smile as he said, “I’m grateful you’re okay and you’re here.” He knew Bakura didn’t want to be.
Bakura’s chest tightened with… emotion. He knew Ryou wanted to hear something nice in return… but his feelings were complicated. He’d been so angry with Atem to be back, and although the situation was better as he made a life for himself with Ryou… He was weary. He had been trapped in this world longer than anyone except Atem could imagine, which certainly was a reason Ryou’s little scheme regarding Zorc had touched his heart when nothing else could. There was no way he could understand, and yet… he was willing to suffer… for him.
His strangeness and his strength shouldn’t be overlooked because of his softness, but Ryou was pure. Selfless. He deserved more than… this. Better than… me.
Ryou brushed his lips delicately across the Egyptian’s. “I might have been the landlord, but you are my home.”
There were no words for how this all made Bakura feel. There was great sorrow interwoven with shame and discomfort as well as with desire and awe. 
Ryou brought a hand to Bakura’s face, looking over the scarring under his eye. He stroked his thumb over it then pressed his next kiss to it. “I like this. Does it hurt?” he inquired.
“No.” Netjer, this boy was odd.
“Marik’s back hurts often. So I wondered.” Ryou said before he kissed his lips again, more boldly. “I told him he should go to a doctor, but he’s quite afraid of them. He says weed helps. Did you ever smoke in Egypt? I--”
Bakura silenced him with a firm, soul consuming kiss that ignited Ryou’s heart and brought tears to his eyes. The hand at Bakura’s cheek slipped into his hair, and Ryou opened his mouth to him, clinging closer as his tears fell onto Bakura’s beautiful skin. 
Bakura pressed his tongue past his teeth, eyes closing. Everything about this was divine… and he couldn’t help but to notice how right it felt. Everything that had ever happened to him had served the purpose to allow him this moment. In an instant everything had changed. He smiled against Ryou’s lips. The serenity was a relief he had craved yet had been without for so long he had forgotten what peace could possibly feel like.
“It wasn’t by accident you’re here. Or by whatever technicality of the millennium items you attribute it to through Nisut Atem.” Marik had told him in their first encounter following the resurrection. “The Netjeru have always known your purpose. Whether or not you place any faith in Them... You are loved. And you are a reflection of the divine. They have a plan for you.”
He’d never felt so insulted or infuriated, and he hadn’t spoken to Marik since. Love? If any god loved him, why was he ever in his wretched predicament in the first place? If any god loved him, why had his family been slaughtered? How did any of it evidence Netjer cared at all when suffering thrived throughout the world for thousands of years?  
But now he had this precious boy in his arms. As Ryou eagerly worked his lips against his, Bakura’s tongue stroked over his hungrily.
Bakura reached for Ryou’s phone on the table.
“What are you doing?”
“Texting you in sick to work.”
Ryou giggled at this but took his phone back. “No, I need to go.” Another kiss and he rose from his lap, dropping his phone into his backpack. “Senebty.”
The sunshine this lately morose boy radiated surprised the library staff, but no one questioned it as Ryou went to load onto a cart the books which needed to be shelved. Glancing to the schedule on his way to put the books away, he was pleased to find he would be working the next circulation desk shift with Akali. 
He loved the library, but he was working on plans to open a combination occult and tea shop. Magic and tea were his favorite things!
Book shelving was relaxing. He didn’t know why most staff hated this. It was easy and fun. It only became tedious when too-full shelves needed rearranging to make space.
As he alphabetized, he thought of the discovery last week Bakura had been defensive about. Marik, frustrated with Bakura’s avoidance, had went about texting him using a custom keyboard he had invented for typing in hieroglyphs. It was faster for Marik than transcribing Egyptian into a Latin alphabet, and it just made sense this way since Bakura did not know any Arabic, and Marik hadn’t been in the mood for Japanese. Japanese took more effort. (Atem had been delighted to install the hieroglyphic keyboard.) 
The problem was the vast majority of Egyptians had been illiterate, and this included the thief king. He had no issues with English or Japanese due to living through Ryou for many years, but it was still annoying that anyone expected him to be able to write or read hieroglyphic text.
“You could download Duo Lingo and start learning Arabic with me and Atem.” Ryou had suggested.
“Marik’s Japanese is fine!” Bakura had shouted. “If I wanted to communicate with him, Japanese would be fine! Why is it my fault if that bitch doesn’t feel like texting in Japanese? Fuck him!” Why the hell did he need Arabic? He would be perfectly happy to never set foot in the fucking desert again! 
By the time he finished shelving, then worked in the donation room sorting books, it was time to return to the circulation desk and greet Akali. 
“Hello!” he exclaimed cheerily. He waved to her and stepped to one of the computers, bringing up the tournament page on the Kaiba Corporation website. “I signed up for this, and… I thought you might like to join me?” he asked hopefully. If none of his other friends would talk to him… it would be much better if someone was there who would. Someone unaware of his drama. “I haven’t played an official game in a while, but I’ve been practicing on Duel Links… I used to be quite good in junior high, maybe I can get back into it...”
@yugioh-dsxpl
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padfootagain · 4 years
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Hello everyone! I'm so happy to host a new event for my blog! It has been a while since I made one of these writing events, and I hope you will enjoy it! I've organized it to celebrate my blog hitting 4.7k followers!!! This is unbelievable, tbh, I have no idea what you guys are doing around here, but thank you so much for it anyway!!
So, for the coming weeks, I'll be writing your requests, that you can send me using the prompts I'm proposing in this post, under the cut! I hope you'll have fun!
 Carole, what is going on now?
 For this event, I'll be answering some prompts! The idea is simple: you choose one of the characters I write for and a few prompts, and I will write a one-shot for the character you have chosen, using the prompts you have chosen. You can also indicate more details that you would like to be included in your request (a specific AU or situation… ). It's super easy, and it makes you choose what I'll write for the next 2 or 3 weeks!
 How do we request something?
 In order to send a request, all you have to do is send me an ask through my inbox (please, do not use the dms, it is much harder to manage for me and I will probably forget about your request…). You can choose between 1 and 5 prompts amongst the prompts listed below the cut. The prompts are pieces of dialogue, and it will be my job to imagine a scenario where the characters use these lines. Choose also a character. It has to be a character in my masterlist (at the exception of Billy Russo and Regulus Black, their requests are closed). If you're a little shy, don't hesitate to switch on the anon function, I will still accept your request! Please, only ask for one request, because I want to write for as many people as possible.
And that's it! Super easy, isn't it?
 A sum up?
 In order to get a one-shot:
-Choose a character in my masterlist (except for Billy Russo and Regulus Black, their requests are closed)
-Choose between 1 and 5 prompts that you would like to see appear in your one-shot. There are 100 of them, and they are all gathered below the cut! No need to send me the whole prompt, just send me the number corresponding to your prompts!
-Send me a message through my inbox (no private messages)
-You can only make one request, so choose wisely ;)
-You can ask as an anon if you're a little shy
-I'll be working hard on your request, so a little nice message or at least a 'hello' would be lovely :)
 The requests will be open for 48 hours (September 8 – September 10 2020), and they are open beginning… right now! The duration for the opened requests for the event might change, depending on how many requests I receive.
Please, be understanding that there is no way for me to judge if this event will be popular or not. If I receive too many requests, I won't be able to write all of them. I'm sorry if I don't have time to go to your request, please, be understanding if that happens. But maybe I'll have time to write all of them! It is hard for me to judge beforehand.
I hope you have fun with this event, and thank you all again for your support!
The prompts for the event are listed below. For a few of them, they might include several lines. All prompts are given a number, all you have to do is send me the number corresponding to the prompts you want, no need to type the whole thing in the ask.
Have fun!
NB: I have no idea why so many of those give off some serious idiots in love and idiots to lovers energy, but… it happened…
 1."KISSES!"
 2. "You are too far away."
"I am literally on the couch with you..."
"But are you in my arms? No. See? Too far away."
 3. "If you weren't so cute, I would break your legs right now."
 4. "Wait… are you jealous?"
 5. "Stars and tequila. It's perfect."
"No. Stars, tequila and you. That it perfect."
 6."I think I've made a mistake. Very big mistake. The kind that makes me wonder if I should escape to another country..."
 7. "I WANT MY COOKIES!!"
 8. "Maybe I love you a little too much, and that's why it hurts sometimes."
 9. "Does it hurt?"
"Not that... OUCH!"
 10. "I can't believe you got punched in the face."
"For you. I got punched in the face for you."
 11. "It's dark, and it's late, and I'm cold and I'm drenched with this freaking rain and yet all I can think about is that I love you."
 12. "I know you don't love me. It's okay. I will be whatever you want me to be."
 13. "You don't need to love me for me to love you, you know? That's not how loving works. It would save us all from a lot of pain if it did."
 14. "What do you mean you have a date?"
 15. "I propose that we get excessively drunk and then ruin our lives as a consequence. Sounds good?"
 16. "I'll always be here for you. Don't you know that by now? That I'll never leave?"
 17. "I think we need... to make something explode."
 18. "I'm pretty stupid, aren't I?"
 19. "Huh... is that my shirt you're wearing?"
 20. "I miss you. I hate it. I hate you. I love you."
 21. "I'm proud to be with you."
 22. "So... huh... are we gonna mention that you've just snogged me or...?"
 23. "What do you mean lying to your family about us? What do you mean you need a 'plus one'?"
 24. "I have only one thing to say: that is the stupidest idea I've ever heard. Let's do it."
 25. "Huh... were you going to... propose?!"
 26. "Will you marry me?"
 27. "Look... I don't mean to be blunt but... you and me, it's a forever kind of thing. And there's no escape from that."
 28. "Fate? Me loving you, you think it's fate? Nah, it's not fate. It's a choice. I choose to love you and to give you everything I own and everything I am every single day. And that's why what we have is true love."
 29. "Do you have ANY idea of how worried I was about you?"
 30. "I think you've just… puked on my shoes."
 31. "I swear, if you die, I'm going to kill you."
 32. "You're perfect."
 33. "I love you. Do you think you could ever love me too?"
 34. "Cuddles, cuddles, cuddles!"
 35. "I'm sorry. For everything. I'm not going to ask you to forgive me though, cause I know that I don't deserve it."
 36. "Just… shut up and kiss me."
 37. "Please… stay."
 38. "But if you leave now, what am I going to do with the rest of my life?"
 39. "I don't want anything but you."
 40. "You deserve so much more than what I can give you."
 41. "I wish I did, but I don't deserve you."
 42. "You make me so happy, it hurts a little."
 43. "What if we don't make it?"
 44. "Are you… are you bleeding?"
 45. "I… I'm begging you… if you must kill someone, then kill me. But please, please… let him/her go."
 46. "I can't lose you."
 47. "What do you mean… you're pregnant?"
 48. "You are so annoying…"
 49. "You're an idiot. I love you."
 50. "Don't leave me. Don't ever leave me…"
 51. "Well… that was hot."
 52. "So… good morning?"
"We're in the same bed. What the fuck are we doing in the same bed?!"
 53. "I mean, we don't have a choice… there's only one bed. And I am not sleeping on that dirty carpet."
 54. "Us being together, it's a terrible idea."
 55. "LOOK! IT'S SNOWING!"
 56. "This is the worst Halloween costume I have ever seen."
 57. "Promise you'll always love me."
 58. "I need your word. Promise me that you'll come back to me."
 59. "So… does that mean… farewell?"
 60. "I think we’re excellent at making memories.”
 61. "Did you… did you sleep with him/her?"
 62. "Where are you?"
 63. "BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!"
 64. "Dear God… I'm surrounded by idiots…"
 65. "I don't want you to go with him/her. I want you to choose me instead."
 66. "What if we stayed in bed all day?"
 67. "You fool! Fear my wrath!"
"Babe, you're threatening me with a broccoli, it is not very convincing."
 68. "Karaoke night!"
 69. "I am full of surprises!”
“Sadly, yes, you are...”
 70. "Dance with me. Please?"
 71. "I would do anything to convince you to give me a chance."
 72. "I know it's hard. I know that life keeps on getting in the way. But I love you. I love you with my entire being, and I'm willing to fight for you. I'm willing to fight to keep you."
 73. "Are you… are you crying?"
 74. "Stop stealing my blanket!"
 75. "Happy New Year!"
 76. "Merry Christmas!"
 77. "Is that for me?"
 78. "Happy birthday!"
 79. "So… is that… a date?"
 80. "What do you mean it was a date? It wasn't a date!"
"Of course, it was a date!"
 81. "Well… that… was a good kiss…"
 82. "I'm a complete moron! I'm an idiot! I am the epitome of stupidity! It took me forever to realize it, but now I see it, and I'll be damned if I let you walk away. Because it took me all that time to realize it, but I love you. I love you so much. It's always been you."
 83. "Are you drinking my cocoa?"
 84. "Please, just… hold me. Please, hold me close."
 85. "I'm cold."
"I'll keep you warm."
"Nice try!"
 86. "It hasn't stopped snowing. We're stuck. We're gonna die."
 87. "I AM NOT DYING HERE! IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE! WITH YOU!"
"I know that the important information here is that we're gonna die, but I'm very upset that you don't want to do it specifically with me. Why not? I'm a dream!"
 88. "Can I try some of your food?"
 89. "I should have told you long ago."
"Tell me what?"
"That I love you."
 90. "I am not going through a thirty-hours drive with you. There is absolutely no way."
 91. "I used to hate you. Then, I simply disliked you. Now, I hate you all over again."
"Well, the feeling is mutual. But maybe it'll change."
 92. "I really like you."
"I love you."
 93. "Well, if you really were that clever, then you would know that I love you!"
 94. "You have fever, you need to drink this. Come on, now."
 95. "I just… I feel like I'm truly myself when I'm with you. I want to be myself when I'm with you. So now, if you're scared, don't call it love yet. But whatever you want to call it, it's incredible, and I'm not going to give up on this. I'm not going to give up on us."
 96. "You're my home."
 97. "Why is summer so hot?! I'm melting!"
 98. "Have you ever felt like… memories get attached to a word and they almost change their meanings? Like… whenever someone says 'apple' I think of my grandma's pies, to the point that I almost forget that they're talking about the fruit. Well… your name… it's the same for love. When I think of love, I think of you."
 99. "What wish did you make?”
“To spend the rest of my life with you.”
 100. "If you only let me spend the rest of my life with you, I'd be happy with that. I don't ask for anything else, really. My life is complete as long as you're in it."
48 notes · View notes
needtherapy · 4 years
Text
soaring, carried aloft on the wind...continued 15
A story for Xichen and Mingjue, in another time and another place.
The Beifeng, the mighty empire of the north, invaded more than a year ago, moving inexorably south and east.
In order to buy peace, the chief of the Lan clan has given the Beifeng warlord a gift, his second oldest son in marriage. However, when Xichen finds out he makes a plan.
He, too, can give a gift to the Beifeng warlord, and he will not regret it.
Part 1: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13   Part 2: 14 / 15 / … HOME
It’s complete on AO3 here.
Notes: Check the tags if you’re concerned about the pairings ;)
For translations of the entirely fictitious Beifeng language, you’ll have to scroll to notes. I’m only going to translate something that’s not clear in the text. Sadly, there’s just not any other good way to do it on Tumblr!
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Chapter 15 Earlier
Huaisang looked nervous, and it was not an expression that sat easily on his face. He paced in Xichen’s tent, ignoring his questions until Xichen finally set down his book and grabbed Huaisang’s arm.
“Anati, I am going to throw you out of my tent and into a snowbank if you do not tell me what bothers you.”
It was an idle threat, and they both knew it. Xichen was far too happy to do any such thing, and everyone knew it. He did try not to walk through every day with a foolish smile on his face, but he knew he failed most of the time, especially the days he woke to the sight of Mingjue’s face next to his. Especially on the days Mingjue stopped to see Xichen while he was working in the hospital to kiss his forehead. Especially on the days they put on their warmest clothes and rode out across the frozen plains together. Xichen was not so childish as to think they would never have any conflicts, but he was also not so naïve as to think the love he felt was common. It certainly wasn’t something he’d ever seen before.
Huaisang sank down onto a round pillow and sighed. “Anakau wants me to tell you something, but I’m a coward, and I don’t want to.”
Huaisang was in no way a coward, but he looked truly miserable, and Xichen’s heart stopped. All he could think was that Huaisang had heard some news about his family, or something terrible had happened to his brother, and his grip on Huaisang’s wrist tightened.
“Tell me,” he whispered hoarsely.
“We have had an offer from the Jin clan, an offer of good faith. They wish us to end our current advancement on their city and consider negotiations. I do not wish to accept anything…” Huaisang paused, his face darkening. “I’m sorry, I can’t explain more, but we are considering it, at least for the duration of winter. It would buy us time.”
Xichen let out a whooshing breath of relief, but Huaisang looked unhappy still.
“It is an offer like...like the Lan clan made.”
Xichen sat back and instinctively pulled on the stony, impassive mask he had not needed in months. “Mingjue wants to accept?”
Did he have a right to feel betrayed? Icy fingers crawled up Xichen’s back as he considered the terms of the treaty. For his pleasure. Given first consideration. In equal status. Pledge of life bond. No, they were breaking no terms, but he had thought…
It didn’t matter what he had thought. He reminded himself of the facts. He was a gift, not a choice. And he had no choices either. He could not go home to his father.
Xichen dug his thumbnail into his palm to focus his thoughts and still his expression into neutrality, but he must have looked betrayed, because Huaisang shook his head, words rushing out of him.
“It would not be like you. No one could be like you. There are reasons this is important, and they don’t have anything to do with you. Anakau is not happy with me, but it...I think we should accept a conditional agreement, a trial period of sorts, as though we are seeing if the situation suits. It would only be for three months, and it would not be real, Xichen. You are not being replaced.”
This last was said with such guilty vehemence, some of Xichen’s hurt faded, but not all of it. Perhaps not replaced, but he can’t imagine this won’t change things.
“I think we need to do this,” Huaisang added. “We won’t get another opportunity to...well, anyway, anakau told me I had to talk to you about it first. If it helps, I think he’s punishing me.”
It did not help. Xichen still felt wounded, creeping apprehension slithering around his gut. He should not have become so accustomed to his life over the past few months. He should not have forgotten what his role was here. He didn’t want this, but there was nothing he could say. No matter what he felt, no matter what he believed Mingjue felt, in truth, Xichen was only a visitor here.
“You do not need my permission, Huaisang,” Xichen reminded him, aiming for serenity but not quite managing to keep the disappointment entirely of his voice, and Huaisang sagged.
“I know, but I wanted you to know before...before he arrives. If I didn’t believe it was necessary…” He ran his fingers over his hair, disrupting some of it from his braid. Standing swiftly, he stalked to the door, but paused and turned back. “I think of us as friends and brothers, Xichen, and I hope you can forgive me.”
He disappeared, and Xichen hoped so too.
When Mingjue came for dinner, he hovered in the doorway, hands behind his back, uncertainty stamped on his face, until Xichen sighed and beckoned him in.
“This is not for me,” he said quietly, without moving. “You are...angry?
The worst part was, Xichen wasn’t. He believed Huaisang. He knew the brothers had secrets. And he loved Mingjue. He could trust them for a little while longer, he thought, ignoring the voice that said you have no other option.
“No. Just worried,” he said, mostly truthfully, and then Mingjue moved, crushing Xichen in his arms and tucking his face against Xichen’s neck.
“Komi auha, edas ahora,” he murmured, and Xichen let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, sinking himself deeper into Mingjue’s embrace like a slowly submerging stone.
Evidently, the Jin clan expected their offer to be accepted, because the Jin emissary—it makes it easier for Xichen to think of him in political terms—arrived by the end of the next week. Huaisang asked Xichen to attend the greeting, and Xichen only agreed for the chance to silently observe the Jin man. He noted with unkind satisfaction that Mingjue’s face was still filled with storm clouds when he looked at his brother.
It was disappointing, though, that Jin Guangyao, the man Huaisang said was the eldest son of the Jin clan chief, was more appealing than Xichen wished he was. He was a little taller than Huaisang and looked to be Xichen’s age or even younger, with fine, delicate features and large soft eyes that reminded Xichen of the deer who lurked around the horse yards, hoping to steal their grain.
Jin Guangyao bowed deeply to Mingjue, spine stiff, shoulders straight. “Chifeng-Zun, this one is willing to serve in any way necessary to ensure peace for three months as agreed. Or longer.”
Mingjue’s expression didn’t change and he didn’t respond to Huaisang’s translation immediately, but Xichen thought his eyes had an appraising look in them, hopefully only curious about Jin Guangyao’s rigorous formality and not interested in his perfect skin and full mouth. Jin Guangyao looked up at him from lowered eyelashes, a curve of a smile on his lips, and Mingjue arched an eyebrow.
“Ti erodino anot auha. Eina et nagita di pia ti?” Mingjue asked Huaisang, and Huaisang frowned at him.
Neither of them was looking at Jin Guangyao, so only Xichen saw his reaction to Mingjue’s blunt assessment—He looks weak. What use is he? Anger flashed across his eyes, disappearing as swiftly as one of Wangji’s moods, and Xichen realized that if nothing else, Jin Guangyao spoke enough Orera to be insulted. How interesting.
Huaisang led them to Jin Guangyao’s tent, near Xichen’s. It was smaller and there were spells set in twisting lines of metallic thread on the door flap. Xichen had been learning about the Ikarahu magic since his birthday, hoping to use Sikunadis to its full potential. Their magic was  more ambient than innate, theoretically unlimited in scope, and skilled users could form fire-like towers of heat, shift piles of dirt, control bodies of water, or cause great gusts of wind. However, it was slower and more difficult to access than Xichen’s power, requiring complex drawings in air or on surfaces to hold the magic or precise positioning of the hands and fingers.
The magic could also be stored in small amounts in the metal Sikunadis was made of, and Ikarharu craftsmen used thin wires of it in weaving, in books, in healing tools, even in the bridles they used to break wild horses. Xichen wasn’t able to pull magic from the air, ground, or water the way the Ikarahu did yet—Huaisang thought he would eventually be able to learn the skill—but he could activate the woven spells. The ones on Jin Guangyao’s tent were, to Xichen’s eyes, very clearly a lock.
Jin Guangyao frowned at the guards. “Is this one a prisoner?”
Huaisang laughed merrily. “No, you aren’t a prisoner, Guangyao. The guards are for your safety, of course.”
The man’s chin tilted up slightly when Huaisang said his name, although Xichen wasn’t sure if it was offense at the informality or if he suspected the lie. Two interesting things, he thought.
Xichen had heard Kitingi crying overhead as they walked, but Huaisang always seemed to know when she wanted to land. He held up a hand before they entered Jin Guangyao’s new home, and with a rustle of wings, she was there, alighting so swiftly it was as though she had appeared from nowhere.
“Oh,” Guangyao said, and for a single breath, there was something different on his face, a look of naked wonder, a sudden tempest of intelligence that turned into curiosity. “She’s beautiful.”
Huaisang’s expression sharpened. “How do you know Kitingi is a female?” “Males have black eye masks,” Guangyao said absently, without taking his eyes from Kitingi, and Kitingi preened one outstretched wing, accepting his admiration as her due.
“You are very observant, Guangyao. Where did you learn about munaku?” Huaisang asked with a casual grin.
He set Kitingi on Xichen’s shoulder and Jin Guangyao’s fingers twitched, as though he wanted to lift his hand to intercept her, but as quickly as the impulse had compelled him, it passed, and he straightened, the calm sea returning to his face.
Instead of answering Huaisang, he bowed to Xichen with a dazzling smile that showed off perfect white teeth and dimples that made him look younger. “Although we have never spoken, this one is familiar with your reputation. Would this one be allowed to visit Zewu-Jun?”
“Zewu-Jun is not a prisoner either, Guangyao,” Huaisang said before Xichen could answer. “When he is not with Ipira’orhew Ikira, he is generous enough to spend time helping our healers, though, so don’t be offended if he’s hard to find.”
Jin Guangyao’s smile was tight, and he nodded understanding. Xichen thought he truly did understand Huaisang’s meaning. He felt sorry for this man, who seemed gentle and polite and ill-suited to be a political prisoner.
“Is Ipira’orhew Ikira the title Chifeng-Zun would prefer?” Jin Guangyao asked blandly, and Huaisang waved his hand dismissively.
“It doesn’t matter one way or the other. Whichever is easier for you to say.” Jin Guangyao took a moment to digest this, and then asked, “Does Huaisang have a title he would prefer?”
Xichen was startled. He had never thought to ask if Huasiang had a title. Huaisang seemed startled too, and Xichen thought he might not answer.
He pursed his lips thoughtfully, but eventually replied, “I do not necessarily prefer it, but my title is Oringa'anhu Ikira.”
Hidden Cat Lord, Xichen translated in his head without smiling as he wanted to. It seemed fitting.
Jin Guangyao rolled the words around, faster with the unfamiliar tones than Xichen had been. “It is pleasing to say. If there is no objection, this one will use it.”
Huaisang turned with a careless shrug, taking Xichen’s elbow to lead him out of the tent, but the expression on his face was not one Xichen had ever seen before.
“I don’t like him,” Qingyang told him over dinner, sniffing her cup of white tea.
Xichen had found that the Ikarahu actually liked their bitter, dark tea. For months, he had despaired of ever drinking anything palatable again until the day Mingjue presented him with a jar of delicate white tea that smelled like summer and was immediately recognizable as one of the finest Zhao teas. Xichen hoarded it fiercely, but he was willing to share it with Qingyang, because she, at least, would appreciate it.  
Although she still taught him Orera, Qingyang had recently begun spending her free time in the company of Titakau, the Ikarahu healer who was teaching Xichen her tribe’s way of using tiny needles to alleviate pain and adjust energy flow. The woman had watched Qingyang with huge dark eyes for months and had eventually worked up the courage to do more than look. Xichen was happy for Qingyang, whose feet seemed to be drifting on air, but he missed her and was not above bribing her with tea. Selfishly, he wanted her opinion on Jin Guangyao.
He took a sip and held it in his mouth before asking, “Do you know him?”
“I have met him. He’s considered charming and handsome.” She shrugged as if they were rumors she couldn’t personally verify, and Xichen suppressed a smile. “I’m not sure anyone knows him. More importantly, and more unfortunately, I know the Jin chief. At best, Guangyao is an agent of his father. At worst, he is a true son of his father.” She shuddered and took another sip.
“It would be better if he was a spy?” Xichen asked, and Qingyang noded without elaborating. “Do you think that is likely?”
She shrugged. “Who knows, but he is too clever and too self-possessed to be here for any reason but his own. I don’t trust him, and you shouldn’t either.”
Xichen nodded and thanked her for her advice. He trusted Qingyang, but Xichen couldn’t bring himself to condemn the man for his father’s sins, whatever they might be, as Xichen hoped no one would think he was like his father.
In only a few words, she had confirmed what Xichen thought about Jin Guangyao. He was clever and composed. He was handsome and polite. He was undoubtedly there for some concealed purpose. And now, Qingyang had made Xichen even more curious about what exactly it was.
Notes:  Komi auha, edas ahora. = I am sorry, beloved husband.
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nctzendreamz · 5 years
Text
Little Things (3) :: Mark Lee
Mark love so many things about you, but he’ll never let the words slip out of his mouth.
Pt.1 / Pt.2 / Pt.3
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Breathe Mark...breathe. His stomach is currently turning in a never ending hell of knots, and his breathing was so staggered. This was his constant party trick when he was embarrassed, and words could not describe how embarrassed he was right now.
He knew you would tell him to observe his surroundings.
Look at the floor, Mark. Focus on the color. Is it brown? White? Gray? Wooden? Think about how it feels on your feet. You can feel the cool breeze, can’t you? It’s giving you a chill, but with the heat outside, it feels really good.
Even though he was talking to himself, he was able to convince himself that you didn’t hate him. That it was you whispering into his ear and getting him out of his shake.
You were always so good at that. You were good at practically anything you put your mind to, but especially that. You could talk anybody out of doing any bad deed, or calm them down when they needed to be held.
Just as Mark goes to lean against the counter, almost ready to return back to the reality that was you and his members probably having the time of your lives, he hears the door swing open. He can’t even look.
“You okay, bro?” Johnny questions, and his tone is very light. “You kinda ran away back there.”
“Fine.” Mark mutters, a clear indication that he didn’t want to be bothered. He knows this isn’t Johnny’s fault. He knows that this is all him, but even so, he needs someone to blame. He doesn’t want to be the bad guy in any of your stories. He wants to be the one you run to.
“You know, whatever you’re thinking right now would probably calm down if you just said it.” Johnny’s beside him now, a hand on his lower back.
“It’s—
“Don’t even say that to me, Mark. Don’t say that it’s not that simple, because it is. The love of your life confessed their love for you, and you let them walk away thinking that you didn’t feel the same. Do you know how many guys would kill for that? Huh?”
There’s a stern tone in his older brother’s words, and Mark can tell how done he is with this whole ordeal. He was right, of course. He knows how lucky he is. He knows that men would kill to be in this position with the one they loved. Hell, men would kill him to be with you. Still, he’s silent. His eyes are darted straight forward and he’s just breathing.
“You don’t have to listen to me.” Johnny removes his hand. “We both know that actions speak louder than words anyway.”
What was that supposed to mean? Immediately, Mark shoots up feeling unsettled from those words. From the way Johnny walks out so quick, he knows he’s promoting him to follow.
“Doyoung!” You screech, your mouth agape and in desperate need of food. On the leather couch Doyoung is dangling a sole piece of skin from the chicken—your favorite taste, and making you chase his fingers. “Please.” You plead.
“I think I wanna hear you beg some more.” He chuckles, placing it in his mouth.
Mark wanted to hope this was an innocent induendo, but regardless, he was sick. It had only been a clean thirty minutes of him trying to calm down and Doyoung already had your attention. And that smile that was on your face—it was unreal. He hadn’t seen it in so long.
“Listen to me.” Is all Johnny speaks before he walks away, going to get more food.
Mark doesn’t want to move, but he also realizes that this isn’t the best decision. He needs to distract himself and try to move on, just like you were obviously trying to do. He forces his reindeer sock covered feet to move forward—of course a gift from you during the Christmas season, and he’s making way to go to the couch. They had managed to sit the only two couches he had in here across from eachother while the coffee table gave space for food and drinks. He sits on the couch you and Doyoung aren’t cannodling on. Jaehyun and Jungwoo are sitting on this couch.
“Did you fall asleep in there?” It’s Doyoung, and Mark doesn’t even crack a smile. They’re making eye contact, but you don’t notice it’s intensity as you’re scrolling through your phone now. Or maybe you’re texting Johnny again. He doesn’t know.
“Nope.” Is all Mark can manage, feeling his heart rate increase from the jealousy he felt. It was such a stupid, small detail—but he can’t help but notice how subtly your shoulder is touching Doyoung’s. He has to sit and watch as your head is slowly leaning on his broadened left, and before Doyoung puts another piece of chicken in his mouth, you take it out of his hand without even thinking. You two looked like a complete couple and he can’t believe this.
He knows exactly what his hyung is doing. He wants him to react. He wants to show him that this is exactly what he’ll have to go through if he doesn’t confess tonight. Even so, the balls still aren’t growing.
“Are you going to eat?” Jungwoo questions. “I’m positive you haven’t eaten all day.”
“And what makes you so sure of that?” Mark responds.
“You’re pale, you have shaky hands, I know you bro. Here.” Jungwoo has some kimchi in some chopsticks, and Mark just eats it to make him feel more at ease.
“I think I’m going to get a head start on painting, actually.” The younger boy rises, and he might’ve been crazy, but he sees the way your eyes peep him for a minute. He’s walking back into his room that seemed even more bland now that you weren’t in it.
The white walls were completely mocking him now, calling him all kinds of mean and harmful names. Every ugly blotch reminded him of kids back in middle school who never had anything nice to say. It’s shell skin tone should’ve been making him feel better even through its plain nature, but he wanted to punch a hole in it.
Mark wants to just lay down and sleep for the duration of this visit. Maybe even make the members paint the walls by themselves. He worked hard enough on music, right? He could be lazy today.
“Since Mark just can’t wait to start painting, let’s all wash our hands, eh?” He hears Jaehyun yell. Mark knows he’s doing this on purpose.
“It’ll probably only take an hour. I mean it’s not like we’re professionals.” It’s your voice, and it’s making his blood boil. The way you spoke so casually now. He was used to you behaving like this, always cool and collected infront of people who didn’t know you as well as they wished, but he was going to ignore his knowledge. He wanted the shy and soft spoken Y/N back.
“Then why did you call them?” The words are sharp off his tounge and he doesn’t even turn around to look at you. He knows you’re haulting now questioning your life choices. Or maybe not that far, but he knows you’re taken aback. Just like he was when he saw you and Doyoung flirting with eachother.
He really was being a jealous asshole wasn’t he? I mean, Mark had his moments, but his surface was always sweet and willing to bow down to anyone who he respected and loved. As he fumbles with the paint bucket—ironically the only you chose for the occasion, he realizes that wasn’t necessary. His words to you. Even so he can’t apologize.
“I figured you didn’t want to be around me.” You say to his surprise. You could’ve made up so many different lies. You could’ve said you didn’t think the two of you were capable of doing such a job on your own. You could’ve mentioned how you hate the smell of fresh paint and would rather the members be doing the nitty gritty. You also could’ve mentioned that you didn’t want to mess up your outfit for that fact as well. But no. You’re projecting instead.
“I didn’t want to be around you?” He chuckles, and the air is becoming very tense very fast. He hates this so much. This animosity that’s been growing between you two for the past couple of hours. “I think it’s the opposite.”
And he has you red handed because you don’t say another word. You huff out in some form of displeasure before you take the paint can out of his hand. You practically throw it on the ground—of course just light enough from bursting before you have Mark’s hand wrapped around your own and you’re storming the both of you out of his bedroom. The other members are looking on and they’re scared for their friend. You weren’t one to mess with and your eyes are raging as you walk past them. Mark doesn’t even have anything in his home to distract him as it was blank as hell.
The night air is semi-chilly, and Mark wants to grab a jacket for you, or at least warn you to bring one, but he knows there’s no point. The two of you are now in the abandoned hallway of his line and he’s standing infront of you.
“You’re an asshole.” Are the first words that come out of your pretty lips. They’re still glossy like earlier. His eyes are looking at his neighbor’s door in attempt to not have to deal with all of this ruckus, but your hands are quicker as they take his chin and direct his attention to where it needs to be. You, and your hurt heart. “All you do is blame me for everything.”
“What?” He mumbles.
“You’re going to talk to me whether you like it or not, Mark. This whole mumbling thing you’re doing is not going to make me shut up so start talking.”
He had never seen you so fiesty. You were like a firecracker burning into his flesh, but he was enjoying it. Maybe a little too much. He didn’t know how he was thinking positive and somewhat hilarious thoughts. You were very angry with him and that should’ve been driving him nuts. It was driving him nuts.
“How do I blame you for everything, Y/N?”
“With your eyes, and your stupid subtle responses to everything. I know you’ve been off since my whole drunken confession mistake.”
“I—
“And I know you probably found it extremely hilarious that I poured out my heart to you and all you did was pretend it didn’t happen, and yet I was still checking on you and loving you like you had the same feelings.”
“Y/—
“And that’s not to say you have to share my feelings, but at least say something, Mark. And then you sit here and kiss my hand and tell me that I’m beautiful like I’m some toy. Am I a toy to you?”
“No.” Is all he responds. His face is so dull, but his heart is about to burst into a thousand crystals. He’s sweating profoundly and he’s trying to find more words.
“Tell me how you feel, Mark. Say it to me right now. I’m a big girl and I can handle it. We both know that.”
“I love you.”
He doesn’t know which one of his ancestors possessed his spirit to spit it out so simply. It slipped off the tounge like saliva to the floor when you were thirsty but also couldn’t stop talking because there was nothing that he was more sure of. You could ask him was his name his actual name and he wouldn’t sound that confident.
“But?” you say, and you’re not quivering. Had he really broken your heart that many times? To where you became immune to his true feelings? That you believed there was a catch to this?
“There’s no but.”
He can see the way your body breaks down. He knows you’re blaming yourself. You’re probably thinking about how maybe you talking to much was the reason he couldn’t get it out. You’re probably imagining false scenarios in your head where you wouldn’t let him get a secret off his chest not knowing it was exactly what you had been dreaming about, and that’s why you never noticed.
“Don’t do that.” He whispers. His balls had finally dropped because he’s approaching you now. Chest to chest—rashing heartbeats just begging to wallow in eachother and finally get to touch through your gentle skin that looked so good beside eachother even through its clothed nature. “Don’t blame your perfection on me being unable to open my fucking mouth, Y/N.” His lips quickly kiss yours, and it feels so good. It was less than a second, but it felt like home. He had imagined so many different scenarios where your lips would touch for the first time and he would then proceed to drag you to the nearest wall and make love to you for the first time. Intense, right?
“I have loved you for so long that I can’t even remember what not loving you feels like. I can’t.” He trembles. “That night when you confessed to me, I felt like I didn’t deserve it. I also didn’t know if it was real. But then the next morning you turned into your beautiful and shy self and I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t ruin us because I’d rather die everyday and still get to be your friend than lose you completely.”
“You were scared.” You finish for him. “But so was I, Mark. I was petrified. I had no idea whether you’d accept my feelings or be completely disgusted. Why do you think I waited until I was piss drunk to say anything?”
“I’m sorry.” He says, nuzzling his forehead into yours. “And I’m sorry for not being a man, because I am one. We’re not kids anymore that get to get away with this. I know I was so wrong. And I suck so bad. I—
But you’re kissing him again. And it’s his first kiss in such a manner. The way your lips are molding into his own with such perfection and the way he feels himself getting hot in unfamiliar places. The way you pull him over you on the door and he lifts your legs around his slim waist so he can get even closer to you. The way your delighted fingers are pulling at his current black strands of hair and he lets out a tiny sigh of agreement and pleasure.
“I love you.” You say, pulling away from him for just a quick second.
“I love you more.” He breathes out before he’s attacking your lips again and is making it known all over your body that he means everything. “You don’t love Doyoung more do you?”
Your laugh echoes into his thick neck as he’s still propping you on the door. “So you were jealous?”
“Of course I was.” He smiles in embarrassment. “We can kick them out, can’t we?”
“We’re about to.”
And now you’re both laughing and hugging eachother tightly as you attempt to catch your breath.
You finally figured it out. You finally both knew what was going on, and you were happy. So so happy.
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moonlightdreamzz · 5 years
Text
My First And Last — Huang Renjun
Renjun has a confession to make.
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Request: Hiiii =3. How are you, i was wondering if i could get a renjun x woc fluff fic when he confesses to y/n at highschool in front of the dreamies. tsym i love your writing!.☆*: .。. o(≧▽≦)o .。.:*☆
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“Renjun, what’s the answer to number five?”
He always hated this class, but today especially was he extremely irritated with it. This weekend had been quite eventful—him spending the whole duration with his boys, and while everything was perfect at first, Sunday night was quite interesting.
It was no secret that Huang Renjun was in love with you. Well, at least to Mark, Chenle, Jisung, Haechan, Jeno, and Jaemin. If a stranger asked he would quickly deny the accusation, claiming the two of you as close friends only, but even they saw through it. The little red tint that would appear on his ears was a telling to the cap he expressed.
Last night, there was an intense game of truth or dare taking place. They all would admit that it was quite childish to be playing such a game as seniors in high school, but they also rarely cared about what others thought. They were bored and waiting on their pizza—what was a better choice?
“Truth or dare, Renjun?”
Chenle was eyeing him closely as his eyes lowered like the evil boy he could be towards his older friend.
“Nah, he doesn’t get a choice. He’s been forcing us to pick dare this whole time.” Mark interrupts, putting the truth cards behind his back. The boys and your girls had made these cards awhile back, wanting to make sure you always had something to do if you got trapped in Renjun’s home during a stormy night or something of that nature. Your hand writing was prominent on the index cards, and he really just wanted to hold a card in his hand. It sounded extremely creepy, but he had missed you. It had been a while since you were able to hang out with him.
“Fine. Dare.” Renjun sighs, covering his eyes. He doesn’t even want to think about the crazy shit one of them was going to ask him to do. Prank call one of his ex’s—politely of course, make him run down the street in a little too much skin showing especially in the freezing cold weather that covered this side of the world this season.
“Hm.” Jeno sighed, his mangled black hair giving him a boyish look as his hand fell on his chin. “Are you guys thinking what I’m thinking?”
No. Why didn’t he predict this? Maybe because he didn’t want to believe his brothers would betray him in such a way.
“Please...” he trails, but the grins on their faces showed there was no going back. It had already been determined.
“You have to tell Y/N you like her.” They all say in unison, laughing loudly as this was all too funny for them.
“I will literally do anything else. Anything.”
Renjun is picturing it now. Him telling you, and your face going from a concerned eye from him saying he needed to talk to you, to a disgruntled look after his confession. Your plump lips that he wanted to kiss so badly would go into your pearly whites, but not in a good way, even though it would look good regardless. You’d feel bad for him—taking a step back and removing your hands off of his shoulder.
“I don’t feel the same, Renjun.”
He didn’t need to actually go through with the plan because he had tried it so many times in his head. Girls like you didn’t fall for guys like him, and honestly he had accepted that a long time ago.
“Do you guys just want me to get curved? I mean seriously what the hell.” He cries out as a pout shoots from his lips.
“Look, we’ll be there.” Jisung assures.
“And if she curves you, you can always say you’re just joking. That’s what I did with Brianna.” Haechan smirks.
“She knows me. She knows I wouldn’t joke her like that.”
“Then you better hope she says yes.” Mark giggles—the doorbell ringing at the same time. The pizza was here, which meant Renjun really couldn’t get out of this now.
That’s why as he sits in his last class of the day, he feels his hands shaking. Truthfully, he thought maybe the boys had forgot about it, or would let him slide, but they made sure to blow up the groupchat with words of encouragement.
— Our boy is finally going to get his girl.
— And if she doesn’t we’ll be here bro.
— We told Y/N and them to meet us at the ice cream spot after school.
Renjun couldn’t help but to laugh sadly at that. You don’t even like ice cream. You were much more of a frozen yogurt person but of course they wouldn’t know that. Not only was he going to get curved by you, but it was going to happen in a place you despise.
“24.” Renjun finally answers the question his math teacher wanted the answer for.
“Good. Make sure you do all of your homework, and no excuses. A for effort so show your work.” That was always the closing statement of his math class, but it also meant that he could pack up his stuff and sneak out. He zips his book bag up—throwing it over his shoulder before walking out of the room. Lucky for him, the door that lead to the parking lot wasnt too far.
As he approaches his cherry red vehicle, he sees that Jisung and Chenle have made themselves comfortable on the hood of his car. They couldn’t drive, so he was frequently giving them rides home, not that he minded. They didn’t live that far away and plus they practically did everything together anyways.
“Are you ready, bro?”
“Are you seriously making me do this?” He sighs, unlocking the door. He gets inside the drivers side while Chenle takes the passenger and Jisung gets in the back.
“Absolutely.” They both say together. The engine is starting, and Renjun is putting the car in drive. “Woah woah.” Chenle interrupts. “Don’t you want to wait for your girl? School ends in five minutes baby.”
“If I see her, I’ll end up driving home instead of to the ice cream place. Just trust me.” He can’t even care about cold weather on his engine with no warm up time. He has to go, and he’s pulling off. He feels his phone vibrating, and he expects it to be Mark or Jeno making sure he’s actually going to show up, but it’s you.
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“What’s with the smile?” Chenle interrogates, trying to look over, but Renjun locks his phone before he can see.
“Oh we know what that is!” Jisung screeches from the back, dapping Chenle up at once.
“Yessirrrrrrrrr.” Chenle screams loudly. It’s at this point that Renjun wishes he could somehow cancel out all of this noise. He loved his friends, but he also hated them very much.
“You’re getting excited for nothing.”
“Yeah whatever.” Jisung responds. His eyes are now locked onto the trees they’re driving past as the light turns green.
It didn’t take them that much longer to get to the ice cream parlor. Surpisingly, Jeno, Mark, Haechan, and Jaemin are already here—music blasting unnecessarily. It was very clear that Mark had the aux as YBN Cordae was preaching for the whole shopping center.
Just as he’s about to park, he sees you. I mean, it was quite easy to recognize that frame, and he doesn’t mean that in a perverted way. You were just so perfect and he couldn’t resist to praise you. You’re approaching the window of Jeno’s car and he can hear you now calling their current set-up ghetto and telling them to turn the music off. All jokes of course, and everyone knew only you were allowed to make them. God, he loved you so much.
“You got this.” Chenle encourages, slapping his knee before getting out of the car. Everyone else follows, and Renjun notices that your friends weren’t hiding in your car.
“Did you come here alone?” Is that first thing he asks you as he embraces you into a quick hug. You smell like perfection, but it fitted you. I mean, you were.
“I tried to get the girls to tag-a-long, but they said it was too cold to be outside and definitely too cold to get ice cream.” The wind blows as soon as you finish your sentence, and he sees the way you shut your eyes tight as if that would make it better.
“Oh no we gotta get you inside.” He says, pushing you towards the door. “Fathead.” He adds, causing you to turn around and punch him in the arm. The other boys are not too far behind.
The parlor is chilly, but it’s much better than the outside. There are pretty lights that glow inspirational quotes such as—“follow your dreams“ “seek what sets your soul on fire”. Quite ironic and bad timing, but knowing you, you find it to be very cute. He would too if it wasn’t mocking him so badly.
“What are you gonna get?” Renjun questions, allowing you to get in front of him to see the board better. Since it’s a Monday, and school just ended, there’s nobody in here but you guys. A habit you formed when you’re thinking heavily, you’re twirling about five braids around your pointer finger. He knows that you’ve made a decision when you take those pieces of hair and throw them behind you.
“Nothing.” You say with confidence. “I can’t do this to myself.”
“Well I know, but maybe you should try something. You might like it a little. I’ll pay?”
“Or how about I just eat some of yours.” You smile brightly at him, your hershey colored skin looking flourecent under the bright lights of the building.
He knows there’s no changing your mind. Once you say something, you mean it. It was all about compromise with you.
“Deal.” He chuckles lightly, moving forward to order.
While he’s at the counter, you speak to the other boys for a little before going to find a seat for you all. Renjun really wants to know what you guys were talking about, as it seemed to be a very hush conversation. Or maybe he didn’t want to know.
He gets his ice cream before the others, and he sits right beside you. When the other members get theirs, they sit at the table beside you guys even though there was plenty of room. They really were gonna do this to him.
Renjun is quite surprised that you don’t question their actions. I mean, it did look very odd that they weren’t even acknowledging what they just did, and instead decided on talking about the All-Star game that just happened this past weekend.
“How was your day, Rennie.”
This was the nickname you had gave him freshman year, and although some tried to call him that as well, it just didn’t feel right unless it was coming from your mouth. You seem to be a little tired—probably from staying up last night to study for a test.
“Not too bad. I’m a lot happier now than I was like 30 minutes ago.”
“And why is that?”
“Can’t tell you.” He smiles sadly, fiddling with his cup full of dairy.
“Oh no, we’re not doing that.” You kick him lightly under the table. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s embarrassing.”
“Come on, they’re not even listening.” You whisper, eyeing the boys who were still going on about how Aaron Gordan got robbed on Saturday. “Talk to me.”
“How do I get this out.” He trembles, fiddling with his fingers as he has to look everywhere but your eyes. “Do you remember when we first met?” He questions.
“Of course. Biology, 1st period. I hated every second of it other than you.”
“I felt the same way.” He chuckles. “But I also felt something else. As time went by.”
You’re not clueless. You know exactly what he’s trying to convey to you. The gentleness in his tone, his refusal of eye contact, it was all leading up to a confession, right? He can see it in the way your body haults. It honestly felt like everything stopped; time, the music, his breathing. Neither of you noticed this, but the boys stopped their yapping too.
“Renjun—
“Let me just get this out, okay? I know you’re going to want to walk away but please.” His voice is hushed now as he grabs your hand. It was something you both did to eachother whenever you were embarrassed, or nervous, or extremely joyful. It was obviously different this time and he could also feel that you know that. Even so you don’t let go.
“Y/N M/N L/N.” He shakes. “Since the day I met you, I knew that you were extremely funny, the sweetest girl I’ve ever met, the most beautiful soul that I had ever come across. But even so I thought I could run away from all of your good attributes. We can stay just friends, right? There just wasn’t a universe where you shared my feelings, so it was better to ignore it. I tried so hard to talk to other girls and give them the attention I wanted to give you to distract myself. It’s stupid I know, but it’s what I tried to do.”
“As the months went by, I realized that it wasn’t going to happen. I couldn’t get over you, but I also couldn’t have you, so I decided that I would be one of the boys in your life that you could always rely on.” He rubs your knuckles softly. There’s a braid hanging infront of your face, and he knows that it’s killing you, so he lets go of your hands for mere seconds to tuck it in another braid. Your features are unreadable right now and he wants to stop, but he can feel Marks hand on his back—patting it in encouragement.
“But I’m in love with you, Y/N. I honestly don’t think I’ll ever not be in love with you. And I don’t want you hearing that to make you feel like I’m forcing you to feel something, or to try to feel something. I just want you to know that you are so loved by so many people. Me especially. I know I’m not the coolest guy in the world, but..but...”
He’s said too much. It felt so good to get his confession out, but now that he was almost done, his breathing was out of control. He had only felt like this when he was in fear of something dramatic—he recognizes this to be because he’s so terrified to hear the rejection he’s going to get, so he runs out. He runs out of the parlor and he takes his ice cream with him. He didn’t even want it anymore.
Of course he’s not going to pull off. He wouldn’t leave Chenle and Jisung here. But he just didn’t want to look at anybody. The minute he sits down in his car and turns it on—an attempt to cool down, he looks into the sky. Was he seriously about to cry?
He’s just going to wait for the boys to finish their icecream. He knows they’re going to come when they’re ready. When he feels a knock on the passenger window, he immediately unlocks the door without looking. He has he hands on the wheel ready to pull off but he also has one question. “Is Y/N in her car yet? We can’t leave her without seeing her pull off.”
“She’s in a car.” Your voice echoes throughout the vehicle. “And she’s very safe. I promise.”
In dramatic fashion, he’s turning his head towards you. When the two of you lock eyes, he can’t believe it. Even when you didn’t have to be, you were so sweet. You were going to politely reject him to his face instead of laughing. An angel.
“I’m sorry—
“It’s my turn now.” You whisper, placing a sole finger on his lip. Except, you don’t speak. You instead take the icecream that was sitting in his cup holder and you’re taking a bite. After you set the spoon down, you’re leaning in. It’s a very slow, but beautiful kiss. First, your foreheads connect, then your nose—your perfect nose. He already loves the feeling. But the best part is when your lips connect. The way your lips completely cover his own and swallow him whole is something he couldn’t have imagined with the clearest mind. The way your lips mold together—it’s romantic—perfect, and he doesn’t understand. He doesn’t stop though. He has fingers in your hair, and he’s bring you two closer than you had ever been. There’s no space for breathing between you two.
It’s him who pulls away.
“I—I
“I love you too.” You breathe out. “I love you so much. And whether you believe it or not, everything you said to me in there is something I’ve felt 1000x more. I swear.”
His eyes are too pure as you look at him right now. He really had no idea. All of your little texts telling him you missed him. How the only reason you were coming to school was to see him. He never caught on. He had spent four years believing he wasn’t good enough for you when in reality he was everything you wanted.
“Are you serious?” He coughs.
“So serious.” You say with pride. “I just ate icecream for you. Believe me.”
He wanted to ask you to be his right then and there. But he didn’t want to do anything to mess this up. Suddenly he hears screaming coming from a cellphone, and it’s yours. It’s the boys.
“What did we say!” You both hear Mark shout. They’re outside now, and they’re running to the car.
“We told you it would work out.” Haechan simpers fron Renjun’s side. He rolls down the window, very confused although he’s putting the pieces together.
“Wait, did you guys know about this?” He’s looking at you now, and you’re so shy. You grab his hand, and it feels so good to hold it back. He’s caressing you’re thumb softly as he can’t hold in his smile anymore.
“Why do you think we dared you to do it?” Jeno laughs.
“They saw me on Friday. Getting some wings.” You put your head into his shoulder. “And they interrogated me.
“Politely, of course.” Jisung smiles.
“We had suspicions.”
“But we didn’t tell her you liked her until she confessed. We were just teasing before she confessed her love for you.”
“Shut up, Mark.” You cry out.
There’s a peaceful silence, before Renjun speaks up.
“Thank you guys. From the bottom of my heart.”
“Of course. You deserve it better than anyone.” Chenle says, tapping the window. They all walk away and now it’s the two of you again.
“I promise I won’t hurt you, Y/N.” Renjun whispers, kissing your forehead.
“I know.” Are your final words. “And it’s the best feeling ever.”
A/N: I hope you enjoyed this! :(
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dfcfanfics · 4 years
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So What the Hell Did I Do This Year?
As if I have to tell any of you this... 2020 was one completely messed-up year.  COVID, elections, full-on national insanity... 
It was also the Year of No New Miraculous Content (outside of the New York special, which I have not watched yet, and about which I’m not completely sure where it officially fits into canon.)  So my stories have been in something of a post-Season 3 holding pattern much in the way that the show has.
Luckily for me, that post-Season 3 status (the Adrigaminette triangle) is rich with storytelling possibilities.  Just about everything that I wrote this year revolved around that dynamic and how it might end up resolving.
LONGFICS:
Stuck In A Bakery (With You) (Complete) (AO3)
When a medical crisis appears to threaten the Agreste household, Gabriel's first impulse is to send his son far away from potential danger. (One does not risk the company's most valuable asset, after all!) While visiting Marinette at her house, Adrien gets the word that he's about to be spirited away to stay with distant relatives for the duration.
But this is the Dupain-Cheng household... and they may have other ideas as to how a less traumatic self-quarantine might be arranged.
My big story for the year, and going by the numbers, my biggest hit yet.  I was a little bit wary of writing a COVID story in this context, but I decided to try something a little different; short, rapid-fire chapters, posted one-per-day for quite some time.  I was cooped up, I was feeling creative, and I felt like entertaining people in the same boat.  
This one was a slow-burn for the ages.  With Our Heroes in captivity and Hawkmoth dormant, Marinette and Adrien explore what they mean to each other, share a bathroom, do their best to avoid hurting Kagami (as Adrigami was an in-progress thing when the quarantine hits) and decide what comes next.  Tom and Sabine manage the business in troubled times while supporting the budding relationship, Gabriel and Nathalie insert themselves into events, the classmates do their best to grasp what’s going on, and a good deed done wrong proves most impactful.
No one gets sick or intubated or buried, even as the realities of the virus and its impact remain present. This is not Pandemic Porn. This is fluff and comfort and two nervous kids learning about each other up close.
Throw Me Around Like One Of Your French Girls (WIP)  (AO3)
Reflecting upon an unpleasant encounter, Marinette makes a small realization... as Ladybug, she can defend herself with ease, but what happens if she's facing down unwanted physicality as Marinette? It's a good thing that she happens to know a classmate who's studying the martial arts, if he'd be willing to teach her some things?
A short multi-parter, a pleasant distraction from the continuing It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time. Fluff, fashion choices, twisted arms, friendship, tension and tap-outs.
The next variation on the triangle’s developments.  It started as a small rumination on what happened in Felix (namely Ladybug punching his lights out), with Marinette learning some Aikido from her handsome classmate.  With Adrigami still happening, Marinette feels much more relaxed around him... and with Marinette relaxed around him, Adrien is increasingly captivated by her.  (Lukanette is Not Quite A Thing Yet in this, though certainly possible.  Luka is Mr. Not Appearing Much In This Year’s Stories Of Mine.)
Unlike in Stuck In A Bakery, Kagami can and does meet with both of them throughout. There is a definite connection each way, and a need to pass the Bechdel Test -- Marinette refuses to let her and Kagami be solely defined by Adrien.  .   
Still in progress, approaching its climax, kind of on hold because Delicate’s been more on my mind.
It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time... (technically WIP) (AO3)
A week ago, the friendly relationship between Adrien, Marinette and Kagami seemed to be blossoming on all fronts... But that was a week ago.
Now, Marinette is wondering what - if anything - in her life can be salvaged.
Then there's a knock at her door... and, suddenly, so many things are changing all at once.
A short flight of fancy, several small parts to come.
Round three in the Adrigaminette triangle -- and this one really _is_ Adrigaminette in nature.  
A highly stressed, frustrated and emotionally troubled Marinette has all the plates in the air right now.  Her wish-he-was-her-boyfriend is seeing her new friend Kagami, she’s not entirely sure if Luka would be an adequate substitute, she has her new Guardianship to contend with, and everything seems to be falling apart at once.
So, when Kagami shows up on her doorstep because Adrien abruptly dumped her... thinking isn’t the first thing on her mind.  Acting is.  And act, she does!
This is NOT a dump-on-Adrien fic, however, no matter how much it may seem so at first.  Adrien gets his turn to express why he did what he did, how he felt he was being unfair to Kagami by continuing, and why he’s just as troubled Marinette is... but Ladybug and Ryuko asking Chat what _he_ thinks they should do complicates that greatly, as you might expect.
I say TECHNICALLY WIP because I feel like it stands well just as I left it... but I feel like I could add another epilogue chapter or two to it at some point.  And perhaps I will.
Delicate (WIP, NSFW!)  (AO3)
A university-aged Marinette hears a cry for help on a quiet Saturday night, while walking home. Her glory days as Ladybug were years ago, but she still has her Miraculous, so... she investigates. What she finds startles her... among other emotions.
This is the one that I had told myself I would never write.  
I’ve been dismissive of aged-up fics in the past that were aged up simply to enable sex scenes without triggering the dreaded Underage tag.  Not as in “no one should ever write those,” but as in “this isn’t my cup of tea as an author.”  But a scene jumped into my head, and it inspired a thought... if Marinette and Adrien _did_ jump straight to age nineteen for the purposes of my story, what happened in those years in-between?  
“Porn Without Plot is like Faith Without Works” was one of the first tags on this one.  Yes, Our Heroes bump uglies in this one... frequently.  But don’t let that scare you off.  There is a lot of exploration here that doesn’t involve bodies, such as: 
Why isn’t Marinette actively Ladybug any more?  Why did Adrien disappear for two years -- and what happened on the night that caused it?  Why is Plagg absolutely furious at Adrien?  How will Adrien explain any of this to his onetime partner -- or to Marinette -- or to both at once, once he recovers from the shock of knowing that they’re one and the same?  And what will the other Kwamis think about all of this?
Lighthearted at its core, angstful when necessary, sexy without being explicit, full of difficult conversations and circumstances.  It’s not about what they’re up to; it’s about why. 
ONE-SHOTS:
A Little Promise I’d Made Myself (Complete) (AO3)
It's New Year's Eve in Paris, and at Rose's house, the classmates (among many others) are having quite a party. Adrien is sipping on his punch, watching merriment ensue, and wondering what the right next move is for him... until he sees a certain classmate sitting by herself, looking less than enthusiastic.
Can these crazy kids find a way to make it work?
Of course they can.
I’m cheating with this one -- it was posted in the last week of 2019.  But it’s New Year’s Eve and this is a New Year’s Eve story and I’m pimping it out, dammit.
Revisit this one and picture That Kiss when midnight arrives wherever you are, okay?
Perhaps I Failed To Think This Through... (CRACKFIC, complete) (AO3)
Gabriel Agreste's first transformation startled him with the changes to his physical form, the raw power at his command, and the endless possibilities that his magical proxies might provide.
But it's always a good idea to try a test run first... and maybe run your designs past a focus group, or something.
Crackfic based around Gabriel’s first attempt at villainy once gaining the power of Nooroo.
It... doesn’t go well.
Some Said He Had No Sense Of Humor (Complete) (AO3)
While wandering down in the room containing Emilie's chamber, Nooroo makes a very startling discovery. He reports it to Gabriel... who demonstrates absolutely no surprise. Little does Nooroo know that his day of surprises is just beginning... and what Gabriel truly has in mind, he will never see coming.
Crackfic based around Emilie’s coma... or lack thereof.  What if Emilie really wasn’t in magical stasis -- and for the least predictable of reasons?
As always... I send my warmest regards to my readers.  Your feedback and comments are always welcome, and they make writing these stories worthwhile.  Stay well, stay happy, stay away from hairy men in trenchcoats, and stay tuned for what next year will bring.  It _has_ to be better than what this one did... right?
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