#(I wanted to make this because I haven’t posted in forever :D)

[people-and-person]

made this because why not?

[unhappy-sometimes]

a 2024 writing retrospective (for sxf fanfic)

ignore the fact that i’m a few days late. i’ve been unbelievably busy the past couple weeks.

in this post i’ll go over the fics i wrote in 2024 think of it as an extremely extended author’s notes. i love to talk and will do so when given the chance.

i’ll start from my latest fic and work my way backwards. spoilers for everything i’ve written in 2024.

(Very) Stupid

Something that I try really really hard to maintain in my writing is believability, specifically when it comes to writing characters. Characters acting out of character is one of my biggest fanfic pet peeves: if I wanted to read about someone’s oc, then I would’ve read a regular book. That being said, I think a lot about how Twilight would actually act like if he were in love. I had an interesting conversation with @cantareincminor forever ago about how he’s so emotionally constipated that it’s kind of difficult to write Twilight in love without making him a bit ooc. Right now in canon it’s hard to imagine him falling head over heels for anyone (in my opinion, anyway).

That being said there are moments in canon where he acts flustered in situations that could be interpreted as romantic. So, for right now, my hypothesis is this: if and when Twilight falls in love, he’s going to be an absolute fool. He’s going to do his usual overthinking and overanalyizing, so much to the point that he starts hesitating over the smallest things.

(Very) Stupid is how I imagine all of that unfolding, although for the sake of comedy I did push things to the absurd. Sometimes Twilight does things in canon with such certainty of “Yes, of course normal people do this, I’m nailing this normalcy thing” that he fails to realize he’s being kinda ridiculous. I also wanted to take that element and incorporate it into a fic.

I also wanted to try subverting expectations (ooh fancy literary term) by having them do romantic things that lead them nowhere. I tried to cram in as many tropes as I could—feeding each other with a fork, only one bed, first kiss—but do so under the guise of Twilight completely missing how dumb he’s being the entire time. He only realizes his feelings until after their first kiss, specifically when Yor surprises him with a quick peck on the cheek. This, of course, was deliberate. I figured that it’d make the most sense if Twilight would only realize his feelings in a situation where he wasn’t the one initiating a (somewhat) romantic gesture because he theoretically wouldn’t be overthinking it. Instead, Yor just sneaks in when his guard is down <3

Endings are usually the hardest things for me to write and (Very) Stupid was no exception. I almost had Twilight pass out at the breakfast table when he kisses Yor but then I realized I’d made him faint in almost every fic I’ve written this year and that felt like a cop out. But I figured it out and I don’t mind the way the ending turned out :D

Also, kind of a random reference, but the title is slightly inspired by VERY NICE by Seventeen lol

Holy crap I’ve written so much for only one fic so far. My apologies in advance.

21 Eden Street

I won’t go into too much detail for 21 Eden Street because it’s still ongoing, but I just wanna brag about how fun it is to write hehe. It’s really enjoyable to write pure crack and come up with stupid and insane ideas with Cantare. You don’t need to have seen either iteration of 21 Jump Street to understand what’s going on. Honestly, we’ve taken very little from the source material and treated it more like a loose guide and a basis for brainstorming.

Don’t worry, we haven’t abandoned it! Cantare is waiting on me to finish writing my chapter (hehe sorry, Cantare!) and soon it’ll be back up and running.

Seeing things

Ah, Seeing Things, my beloved <3

This fic has the least amount of hits out of everything I’ve written (which is not surprising to me) but I hold it very dear to my heart. There’s not a specific reason why other than I just really enjoyed writing it. I also spent a ton of time making supplementary drawings and a whole hype campaign for it, too, so I kinda am obligated to feel some sorta way about it.

Anyway, the way this fic came about is simple; I just had the things I am most afraid of happen to Twilight. Yes, I’m scared of serial killers and my loved ones dying like everyone else, but something I am absolutely terrified of are hallucinations. That and doppelgangers.

Not being able to tell reality apart from fiction activates the flight or fight senses in me. Real life can be scary, yes, but reality is bound by the rules of reality. Literally anything can happen in fiction. The most horrific, awful things are possible in fiction and if those things suddenly become possible in reality???? Girl I am GONE. Passing away. Curling up in a fetal position in the nearest corner. I don’t know if that makes any sense. If I ever start seeing things that I can’t be sure are actually happening or not, I am choosing to die right then and there. Doppelgangers as a concept are also really scary to me. It’s like stranger danger but times a thousand because you can’t tell who the strangers are anymore.

In my initial draft, there wasn’t nearly as much of a tension between Twilight and Yor. If I recall correctly, by then I’d written to nearly the end and realized that for Yor this whole experience has been Loid acting just a little more weird than usual. It might’ve been Cantare’s suggestion (just assume everything after Guy’s Night has been beta’d by Cantare and you’ll be mostly right) but I realized that Twilight probably would start to suspect the people around him were screwing with him. I added the scene where his room was messed up and it all fell into place hehe.

I don’t like writing gore or the like because I feel like typical gore quickly starts escalating into levels of pain that the average reader has no possibility of comprehending and it loses its efficacy. Instead I tried feeding into Twilight’s paranoia, adding things that in isolation are just weird but when put together are unsettling. I shamelessly stole the fourth room hallway from Impossible Landscapes, a Delta Green campaign that I highly recommend you check out if you enjoy surreal horror. I purposefully kept some things vague, like the things Anya sees in Twilight’s mind, the way Handler’s face gets warped, or the description of “the watchers” because I felt like going into detail would lose the unknown-ness of it all. That and I’m lazy heehee.

In some way, canon Spy x Family does deal with ideas of doppelgangers and paranoia. Spies are constantly afraid of being listened in on, they don’t know if they can trust anyone, and they always have to keep an eye over their shoulder. For someone who is always a little scared of being spied on (I cover my phone and laptop cameras for that exact reason), that kinda sounds like torture. Seeing Things was a fun way to crank that paranoia up to a hundred. It was especially fun writing the museum scene because I tried thinking of things that are just ever so slightly off, things that theoretically could exist but clearly don’t.

I also threw in other things I’m scared of, like being watched, being followed, the dark, and the bathroom at night just to be extra mean to Twilight <3

Anyway, I’m rambling and this analysis post will be a novel if I keep this up.

Guy’s Night

I do recognize the insane tone shift going from Seeing Things to Guy’s Night.

What is there to even say about Guy’s Night? I got the idea from Psych (the Last Night Gus episode) who got the general basic from the Hangover movies. I wrote it all out in a few days, one of which I was sick in bed. I don’t know what to say.

Looking back on it, I don’t love the way it turned out. I’m glad I wrote it but where I usually don’t mind rereading my stuff for fun I do kinda cringe at Guy’s Night. It relies on a lot of contrivances which I tried masking with humor but it’s still a bit obvious. If you make a timeline of the previous night’s events, it only kinda makes sense.

It doesn’t help that I went into it with no plan whatsoever. I just sat down and said what happens happens. When I wrote in chapter one that something had happened between Loid and Yor, I didn’t know what that was. When I wrote Loid saying “we need to see what’s on that camera film” I was right there next to him saying “buddy, so do I because I have no idea.” When wrote Franky saying that his friend Marko might have answers, I was hoping he would too because I, like everyone else, didn’t know what was going on either.

The ONE thing I DID know was that Twilight got a tattoo the night before. That was it. That’s all.

I don’t typically plan out everything when I write but I usually have a good idea. For Guy’s Night, I had a bad idea in that I had no idea. It kinda shows. Sorry.

That being said, it was incredibly fun writing their drunk shenanigans and banter. The dynamic between Twilight, Franky, and Yuri was so goofy that I’ve seriously debated writing a sequel of sorts. However that’s incredibly unlikely. If I ever do write a sequel, it’d be a Girl’s Night with Yor and a combination of female characters, probably Sylvia and Fiona.

After Peace (and Glimpses of Happiness)

A quick heads up: I don’t go into detail but I do discuss mental illness in this segment.

I am incredibly proud of how After Peace turned out. Not only did it receive a really good reception for being my first fic ever, but it also helped me work through some things in my own life. It’s important to give some context.

I wrote After Peace shortly after graduating college. I won’t go into specifics, but college was really, really difficult for me. I had been so excited for this next step in my life after graduating high school but instead it turned out to be one of the hardest experiences of my life. Depression came out of nowhere and stomped me into the ground.

I used to have very high expectations for myself; I had a clear vision of what I wanted to do with my life and I was taking steps to work towards those goals. Then my mental health tanked and suddenly everything just felt so difficult and pointless. I’d sleep all day and then hate myself when the sun started to set because that meant I’d wasted an entire day doing nothing when I was supposed to be working towards something. But I just couldn’t do it anymore.

That’s something I’ve noticed that a lot of media gets wrong about depression sometimes. It doesn’t always make you feel sad. Sometimes it just sucks everything out of you—sadness, happiness, anger, everything. I stopped drawing, stopped listening to music, stopped eating, stopped exercising, stopped doing everything that I enjoyed because it felt like the equivalent of doing the dishes. Everything was a chore, even the things that I liked.

What really changed things around was when my poor roommate, who was sick of me sleeping for twenty hours a day, dragged my sorry self to the free counseling services on campus. It’s doesn’t fix everything, but having someone who cares about you and you care about can really help your mental health.

Anyway, let’s not forget I’m talking about an anime fanfiction here haha.

After Peace really did start out as a couple of doodles but as I started to write it, I noticed that there were a lot of similarities between myself and Loid. No, I am not a former spy turned grumpy hermit, but I did once have great aspirations and now have to settle for what reality offers me. Realizing that worth comes from simply existing was something that I had to understand in order to begin my recovery process.

I’ve always found it kind of sad that if you took away the goal of world peace from Twilight that you’re basically left with nothing. He doesn’t really have hobbies, no real friends, and he never takes a day off. That’s hardly sustainable. Would he really be happy when there’s nothing left to do? I’d like to think so, but I wanted to see what would happen if he wasn’t.

I mentioned this in the end note, but After Peace was also influenced by this comic I was working on years ago that had the similar premise of “grumpy man learns to enjoy life with the help of a young girl” (very original, I know). I doubt that I’ll ever release that comic in the capacity I once intended, but it does live on in my secret second tumblr account of you ever manage to find it.

Anyway, I was worried about writing After Piece because Anya plays a big role and I am Not Good at writing children. It was hard striking a balance between making Anya likeable but still realistic. I don’t interact with children often and, as a youngest sibling, I don’t have much experience with them. Anya has so many layers—being a test subject, being a telepath, being a child—that it was hard managing them all. But I’m okay with how she turned out.

There is a slight problem in that she basically disappears once Yor shows up D:

I debated having Yor in the fic at all but then I realized that without her the emotional climax would have to rely on a four year old’s emotional intelligence and then decided right then and there that Yor had to be in it haha.

Yor’s whole deal with accidentally killing the wrong person was kind of a last minute addition. I do wish I was able to explore that more, but I also feel like she’s emotionally mature enough to forgive herself more quickly than Twilight would. She ends up serving a bit of a role model to him. It was also nice to be able to write them interacting with the truth out on the table and for them to be honest with each other.

Pacing was something that I was very concerned with. Looking back on it now, I’m still worried that things move along a bit quickly. However, I am reminded of some advice my graphic design professors gave me: “Good design is when nothing more can be take away.” And, because I was writing this as fast as possible, you best believe I was taking things away if I didn’t need them. I didn’t want to fall into the trap of dwelling on Twilight’s thoughts for too long so I instead opted for showing him progressing through experiences instead. I think it worked out.

However because I took so many things out I decided to start Glimpses of Happiness, a supplementary fic to After Peace that fills in the cracks, so to speak. I wanted to have more moments between Twilight and the other characters, like stargazing with Anya and growing close to Yor. Right now there’s only one chapter, but I have plans for at least a few more. I also thought it was important to highlight that mental health recovery never truly ends. Just because Yor and Twilight had a nice chat on the roof doesn’t mean that things are suddenly okay. It’s a long process that sometimes never ends and I wanted to show that.

Of course, I can’t talk about After Peace without addressing the Midwest allegations. As I said, yes, this fic was inspired by my childhood in the American Midwest, even though I was nowhere near any mountains. The Midwest is a silly place full of nothing to do but go to your local Walmart for fun, but I think it served a good enough setting for Twilight to chill out and slow down. If I really wanted to do full Midwest, I’d have Twilight watch a tornado touch down on a cornfield from his truckbed, but that feels sort of out of place.

I feel like there’s more to say but I can’t think of anything and I doubt anyone’s actually gonna read all the way down here anyway. But yeah, that’s After Peace.

Oh, and the A.M. AM by Damien Jurado Youtube video currently has nine comments that mentjon falling from a five story building, which I think is really funny.

So now what?

Against my better judgement, I’m still writing. I have a couple projects in the works, especially one big big big one that hopefully I can start publishing soon. Keep an eye out for that.

In the meantime, thanks for a great year! I hope 2025 holds more great things in store for us all!

-unso ^. .^<

[u3pxx]

✱ frequently asked questions!

hey there, the name’s den/sun! i’m a filipino artist with too many ideas and too little sleep! i mainly post and draw ace attorney, haikyuu, and disco elysium with the occasional dungeon meshi drawing.

i also like good omens, danganronpa, tmnt 2012, undertale/deltarune, mob psycho 100, splatoon, monster prom, fairly odd parents: a new wish, potionomics, and pokemon! :^]c

rest of the faq under read more (because it's very long lol) | dividers from here! | faq will be updated every now and then

what program do you use?

old answer: i use clip studio paint ex! as of 06/24/2023: i use clip studio paint pro v3 for illustrations and clip studio paint v1 ex for animatics

what brush do you use?

old answer: i mainly use the gasa gaya line pen for sketching and the t-pen for both sketching and inking as of 09/22/2023: i use the koya pen for sketching and inking and the gasa gaya line pen for inking occasionally. as of 12/19/2023: i use the a pen that feels like a pencil (鉛筆を感じる液だまりペン) with the pen pressure opacity turned on for sketching (i also use it for inking occasionally). i don’t ink that much right now but i still also use the gasa gaya line pen for it. as of 03/07/2024: i use both the a pen that feels like a pencil (鉛筆を感じる液だまりペン) and calish ink for both sketching and inking. as of 07/08/2024: i use the dry ink brush on clip studio paint.

do you do commissions?

yes, i do! currently closed right now because i’m a student and art school is hard but feel free to take a quick look here if you would be so interested! :^] however, i do occasionally open 2 slots for sketch commissions whenever i’m in need of some money so watch out for that pftt <3

do you sell prints?

yep! i have an inprnt!

where else can we find you?

you can find me both in twitter, Instagram, and art fight! i also have a youtube where i haven’t posted in 4 years pftt

can we use your drawings?

you can use my drawings for profile pictures, banners, even your little tiktok video edits as long as i'm credited (with a link back to my art account, please!) (also if you did do little tiktok edits with my art can you please send them to me i would be so delighted to see them)  just so we’re clear too, i don’t allow reposting of my art on other social media without my permission or credit. thanks!

can you draw [insert thing here]?

i don’t do requests! and usually, when i ask for things to draw, it depends if i’m feeling up to it so sorry if i don’t!

can i draw fanart of your au’s/oc’s?

YES! please, i’d be so dang honored! and please tag me too if you ever post it so i could see it and reblog it here! :^D (and also gush wail cry and scream about it forever and ever)

what does your username “u3pxx” mean?

it’s just my name den upside down, the x’s are because my old selfsona design had x’s for pupils and i wanted to incorporate that.

what does your tag “pampabait” mean?

pampabait (pam‧pa‧ba‧it) is a tagalog word that loosely means “to make [something] kind”, since the prefix “pampa-” is used to denote the causing of a state and “bait” means “kind”! the way i use it is also kind of referencing the phrase "nasisiraan ng bait" (losing one's mind/starting to feel insane). it's just a tag i use for some wholesome stuff i see that would stop me from going I HATE EVERYTHING FORVEVERRRR

have you played all the ace attorney games?

i have not! only because i got into ace attorney via let’s plays, instead. me and some friends are however trying to finish dgs though we haven’t been able to play for a long time pftt. we’re currently still on dgs2-1.

who’s your favorite ace attorney character?

look at me in the eye, boy. wheezes but it is apollo justice, trucy wright, and klavier gavin.

TAG DIRECTORY

✱ GENERAL TAGS

#sunnysidedraws - all of my polished drawings or doodles i consider high-effort #sunnysidedoodles - stuff that i wouldn’t consider polished but hey, they’re cute lmao #sunnysideanswers - all of my answered asks #sunnysiderambles - my general thoughts, rambles, or whatever #sunnysidetutorials - answered asks on how i do certain art stuff of mine #sunnysidelb - liveblogs of whatever i’m watching/reading #sunnysideplays - liveblogs of the games i play (it's just pokemon right now lol) #sunnysidepolls - whatever polls i make up #sunnysidezines - for previews and the finished pieces of all the zines i’ve been in

✱ ART TAG DIRECTORY (in case you just only wanna see the stuff i drew for a specific thing)

#sunnysideattorney - ace attorney art #sunnysideomens - good omens art (includes bad omens) #sunnysidedisco - disco elysium art #sunnysidemeshi - dungeon meshi art #sunnysidepotions - potionomics art #sunnysideprom - monster prom art #sunnysidemons - pokemon art #sunnysidefairies - fairly odd parents: a new wish art #sunnysideball - haikyuu art #den’s gavinners tag - includes all of my gavinners ocs art, rambles, asks i’ve answered about them, and other posts that reminded me of them #den’s aa roleswap au - what it says on the tin, includes my art and also art that others made for the au! :’^D i also have a sideblog specifically for it #den’s bad omens - has all my stuff and art others made for my good omens roleswap au! #disco femlysium - art of fem!harry and fem!kim (and everybody else) #den's disco swap - art of my disco elysium roleswap au #disco meshi au - art of my dungeon meshi au for disco elysium

[soullessjack]

okay but like. cogs turning .. last holiday truthing cwt maxxing… the sheer difference in dialogue between the script and the episode is killing me. the deliberate choices made to change said dialogue and even the ending…

like am I alone in thinking that this whole exchange in the dungeon was very oddly disjointed? very “nobody fucking talks like that” core. they just say shit but it doesn’t land with the other’s response.

and especially when you compare it to the draft:

for some reason or another, the writers deliberately cut out jack’s lamentation that he is still dangerous, that mrs butters is right to be doing what she’s doing, and that nothing has been the same between him and the Winchesters since he’s come back. they deliberately cut out dean saying “you’re one of us, and you have a chance to make it right.”

there’s also the glaring difference between how sam and dean defend jack in the episode vs the draft. in the draft, they say this:

D: “You said you didn’t want to destroy this family, but Jack is our family.”

S: “You hurt him, you hurt us.”

Mrs B: “No, he’s infected you. I have to keep you safe.”

D: “By trying to kill the people we care about?”

Mrs B: “No, he’s a monster!”

D: “Aren’t we all?”

•••

not only do sam and dean say that jack is their family and someone they care about, but they also explicitly hold themselves on the same monster totem mrs butters holds jack to (much like what dean said in tombstone, “we’ve all done things, so if you’re a monster then we are too,”

…which all then gets cut and turned into “He can save the world.” no, don’t kill jack, he’s our family and we care about him and he is good despite his mistakes -> no, don’t kill jack, he can save the world.

the explicit choice to center jack’s worth on his usefulness rather than his inherent value as the winchesters’ family and even just as a person, rlly speaks so much to the way he’s essentially narratively doomed to be dehumanized as a tool/weapon/device.

and the fact that this is all eventually preceded by Cas saying “you never needed absolution from sam or dean or me. we don’t care about you because you’re useful or because you fit into some grand design. we care about you because you’re you,” (which in turn is preceded by jack fitting into a grand design and fucking off to the raindrops forever), makes it seem either a painful inconsistency or some weird twisted inside joke between the writers (cough season 16 cough cough puke).

I haven’t posted about it a lot but I truly think there’s some vast trapped-in-the-narrative horror working around jack constantly being dehumanized both within the show as a living weapon and by the writers themselves as a plot device.

shits wack I guess

[theoneandonlysemla]

Tagged by: @sheirukitriesfandom Thank you so much! :)

Tagging: @skyrim-forever @dirty-bosmer @lillxart @vanilleeistee @thequeenofthewinter @hircines-hunter @sanza-17

This was so much fun and I hope you’ll have as much fun as I did doing this little challenge! Went with more than one line, because I can’t contain myself as always and picked from different fics and WIPs <3

When you get tagged, post:

A line from your fic that makes you laugh

“I may, my little pebble,” she chuckled and planted a peck on his mouth. He did not kiss her back, remained motionless. “Or do you like it better when I call you a dog?” “A little, if I’m honest. Sounds less… feeble.”

Faralda to Ancano, from Chapter 2 of „Crawl, dear“

Still cracking up about Faralda calling Ancano a pebble that she can kick around. Only can pat my back for that line.

A line from your fic that makes you sad

“Oh, don’t worry. I haven’t found a way to kill me yet.”

Nevri to Teldryn, from Chapter 1 of "Dealings with Daedra: The Curse of Molag Bal"

My girl has the depressos. Also heavily inspired by “The Rooster” by Alice in Chains.

A line from your fic you're proud of

“My heart, would you let me free you from the prison that is your body, would you let me snap every of your bones and drink your marrow to have you inside me forever?”

Mannimarco to Ria, from Chapter 5 of "A Taste of Death"

Going feral over that and the entire scene with it, AAAAAAAHHHHHHH

A line for your fic you think could have been better

Skipping this one because my perfectionism would make me put everything I’ve ever written in here.

A line from your fic that makes you want to punch a character

If Ancano hadn't had to support himself, he would have smacked Nirya right across the cheek.

From "One Last Time"

I don’t care that he’s bleeding, she tries to help in her weird way and he’s nothing but a mean ass man :( Need to punch him in his stupid face.

A line from your fic that makes you go 'aww'

Nodding, Brelas walked to the door, the silky garment hugging her body. It smelled like him, she noted; incredibly good. It would go to bed with her tonight.

From "A Perfect Servant"

They are the cutest babys. Ondolemar gave her his tunic, because he ripped her dress D:

A line from your fic that's full of symbolism

I’m so fucking bad at finding symbolism in my own fics, you can’t believe it. Maybe that whole maggot on nose incident from A Taste of Death, because of the theme of invasion but it should be read as the full scene. Find it in Chapter 3 of "A Taste of Death".

A line from your fic that contains an Easter egg

“’tis but a scratch.” He laughed. “A scratch? Your leg was broken.”

Canmal and Nevri, from Chapter 14 of "Dealings with Daedra: Boethiah’s Wrath"

Classic Monty Python. I had to.

A line from your fic that's shocking

Oh boi. Best I can do is disturbing (no, not the cum and fly bullshit, that will only be on AO3).  

The first cut of his dagger followed the line of her sternum, the blade scratched over the bone and separated the skin like a hot knife did with butter. He missed the bleeding of a living body, imagined how the red would spill all over his hands. Her screaming would ring in his ears, be as pleasant as the song of the early birds of a spring morning. Writhing and kicking under his weight, she’d have no chance to escape, only to bleed out. For a moment, he had to hesitate, gather himself. A delighted tremor had seized his hands and he gripped the handle of his dagger tighter, closing his eyes.

Mannimarco, from Chapter 6 (currently WIP) of "A Taste of Death"

Not him getting horny from dissecting a corpse and thinking about murdering her instead. My excuse? It’s in character.

A line from your fic you want to talk about more

“Whatever you’re trying to confess to me here, it is not real. You may think it is, because you’re blinded. But it is not that. What lingers in you is the urge to protect, a relict of what you have experienced. But don’t mistake it for affection.”

Nevri to Morotar, just a snippet of dialogue I have planned for a chapter. And as it is still WIP and I will get there in like 10 to 15 chapters, I want to talk about it all :P

[ravenzfeatherz]

1920s!guitarspear AU >:D

aaaayyyyy i finally feel like i can yap about this!! and before anyone says anything i know that i forgot adam’s beard on two of the sketches, if you could just ignore that for me that’d be fab lol

guitarspear but 1920s america, anyone?? i’ve always been kind of obsessed with the prohibition era and speakeasies in the US even though i live 9 hours by plane away from you lot (sending love from scotland lmfao), and reading astardanced’s tsfgae fic “gin mills and the goods” only solidified that like a year ago when i first found it. couple that with my brand new shiny guitarspear obsession, and a sprinkle of inspiration from deadgirlwalking91, and you’ve got yourself a potential fic idea.

i’ve not done much on it, but the basic synopsis i have to go off of right now, put simply, is: adam is a pathetic divorcé who is far too desperate to get his ex, lilith, who is a bootlegger and a criminal, back into his life, and makes a deal with her which traps him spying in on an illegal speakeasy. complete with gangsters. oh, and one of those gangsters is lute. also she has a gun. they all have guns. they all want to shoot each other. and adams gonna have a fun fucking time in the mess he landed himself in, as per usual with any adam fic.

i’m still thinking up names for this fic, so nothings set in stone yet, but the placeholder one that’s kicking about in my ao3 drafts which i find kind of funny is “a little party (which definitely killed somebody)”, which is meant to be a play off of that one song “a little party never killed nobody” (which i think was in the great gatsby soundtrack thingy but please dont quote me on that, i’ve never watched it 😭).

i would yap more but like… hhhh i dont want to spoil anything i’m planning on. welp. just know that there’ll be a lot of guns, and probably violence, and drinking, and also likely smut because like… its guitarspear as literal criminals in the roaring 20s, they’re gonna fuck at some point. probably. provided my several google docs of smut i haven’t posted are any decent. but fluff is also inevitable i love these two and i will forever mourn the loss of adam in canon. this is me subtly hinting to viv that sinner adam should be a thing. please. and make him kiss lute. please. that’s all i ask.

IT’LL BE FUN I PROMISE!! no idea when the first chapter will be up, it’ll probably take me a while given i’ve only just started putting pen to paper to figure out the plot, but i’m committed to a fic idea this time and i’m not letting it go unwritten so there’s that :D

[finsterkiibo]

not sure if you're still using tumblr, because it's been a few months BUT I just wanted to say your art is absolutely incredible!! literally one of my favorite drawing styles I've ever seen(the hair floofs?? oh man) and your blog has so much insanely good saiibo content, I adore how you draw both saihara and kiibo, and you've inspired me so much and your quality and quantity of art is just super impressive to me :D

and yeah saiibo is one of my favorite drv3 ships so it's super cool to see this many amazing ideas and art pieces for it!

HEY!!!!!! im still alive i promise!!! i DO still use tumblr!!!! AND I WANNA THANK YOU SO SO MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO SEND THIS TO ME !!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH THIS MEANS THE WORLD ACTUALLY.!!!!! GAHHH ESPECIALLY CUZ IVE BEEN FEELING SO SO LOW ABT MY ART LATELY AUGHH it overjoys me knowing people still love my art of these goobers even if it’s been a bit since ive drawn em!!! i kinda just . lurk on tumblr nowadays cuz i find artists to be way easier to find here than on instagram but. i dont. really post much anymore ahah. you know how hyperfixations are, despite my 4 year saiibo streak i got enamored with an old childhood media i used to love (mcsm) ((and arcane got its claws on me more recently too lmfao)) and i kinda ! haven’t been able to find the motivation to make any saiibo content since , unfortunately ,. BUT I STILL LOVE AND ADORE THEM DEARLY FOREVER THOUGH !!!!!!! i appreciate them and hold them dear to my heart and what DR and its community in general have done for me and my art journey!!!! i DO still make occasional art over on instagram if anyone’s interested in seeing my other oc/fandom work though!!! (finnyfoxx) ((being experimental rn so my stuff is gonna be inconsistent)) and!!! who knows!!! may haps the saiibs will take over my brain again in the future…

[hsangel64]

bandmates part 4!!

pairings: bass player!ellie x lead singer reader

summary: time for the gig but of course there has to be drama through the bliss

warnings: cussing, a little bit of angst, ellie being a dumb dumb

part 1, part 2, part 3

a/n: i’m going to be posting these more often alongside new things! i’m making a tag list so if you want to be on it comment please!

todays the day of the gig. you were more nervous than usual which is weird because usually you’re fine but you’re sweating buckets right now pacing around your room. you did your makeup and already had your usual punk rock ish attire on. you were running your hands through your hair and pacing back and forth. you couldn’t stop thinking about last night. after you said you had liked ellie, dina and jesse stormed in and we haven’t spoken about it since then.

“hey bee you okay?” you halted your actions and turned to face ellie.

“yeah yeah i’m fine- just fine.” you said and turned back around. you didn’t hear ellie move closer until she put her arms around you and your nerves instantly meddled down. she rested her head on your shoulder and you smiled a little.

“are you sure bee?” she whispered in your ear and your cheeks flushed. ellie turned you around to face her, she put her hand under your chin. you felt like you were in a trance almost. just so focused and entranced by her. she pulled your face to kiss you in the cheek.

“if it’s about yesterday we can talk about it after the show so we aren’t worrying about the show yeah?” you nodded and smiled at her she smiled back and placed a quick kiss to your lips.

“okay we gotta go.”

…

you guys got to the venue about an hour ago and go on second to last. you’re all in the dressing room warming up. you’re walking around doing vocal warm ups, ellie is warming up on bass, dina is warming up vocals and guitar and jesse is doing some arm exercises.

“hey.”

“hey what’s up d?” you stop pacing and turn to dina.

“so don’t be mad-“

“oh god what’s up?”

“cats here…” you whip your head towards the door and see cat and ellie talking. oh god

“why is she here she never comes to our shows?!”

“fuckin beats me…no one wants her here not even ellie-“ you both turned to look and ellie looked at us and mouthed ‘help me’ you both giggled and shrugged your shoulders.

“we go on soon though so get ready.”

“oh shit okay.” you rushed to grab your ear piece and make your way to ellie.

“hey don’t mean to interrupt but i need help getting set up. els please?”

“oh yeah of course.” you lifted the back of your shirt to have her hook up the ear piece to your skirt. you and cat made eye contact and she gave you a disgusted look and you just smiled at her. you thanked ellie and let her know that we’re on in about 10.

you made your way back over to your things and made sure you had everything. you grabbed your water and followed everyone else to the side of the stage.

“you ready?”

“ready as i’ll ever be.” you smiled at ellie and made your way on stage. this is the time ellie watches you the most. she can’t take her eyes off of you actually. ellie will always be looking over at you while you sing, you just look so passionate about singing. ellie is so in love with you.

…

you guys had sang four of your own songs and have one more left. you were sweaty and your throat was killing you but the show much go on.

“how’s everyone doing tonight?” you yelled and the crowd yelled back at you.

“we only have one more song for you tonight and it’s a little different than usual. this song means quite a bit to me as it’s about a very important person.” everyone cheered and you grabbed some water because the music started up again.

i’ve never known someone like you

tangled in love, stuck by you from the glue

don't forget to kiss me or else you'll have to miss me

i guess I'm stuck forever by the glue, oh, and you

it didn’t take long to put two and two together that you and ellie had something going on. you and ellie were staring at each other the whole time while singing the song.

finding the right words to use for this song

i have you in mind so it won't take so long

never thought I'd find you but you're here

and so I love you

not once did you two look away from each other.

i’m not wrong

when I say I've been stuck

by the glue onto you

i’ve been stuck by glue

right onto you

i’ve been stuck by glue

you guys finished the song and everyone cheered. you were smiling from ear to ear so much it hurt. you guys ran off stage and all cheered with each other.

“that was probably our best show yet!!”

“let’s go get drinks !!” jesse yelled and pulled dina to the dressing room. leaving you and ellie alone.

“you did a great job bee. i’m so proud of you.” she threw her arm around your shoulders.

“thank you els i think the song was a crowd hit.”

“oh it absolutely was! it all came together you sounded amazing.” she pulled you closer and kissed your head. everything felt perfect but of course it just can’t last.

you guys walked back to the dressing room and just outside cat was waiting. she caught a glimpse of ellie and ran to her, she hugged her and basically pushed you away. you rolled your eyes and scoffed at her.

“hey i’ll catch up with you guys in a bit let me just talk to cat.” she smiled at you and you nodded walking into the room. you audibly groaned.

“what’s wrong?”

“cat of course is sooo happy to see ellie.” you rolled your eyes and started to get your things together.

“oh jesus.” dina rolled her eyes. “come on let’s just get everything together so we can leave.” you nodded and grabbed your bag and put away your things in a case. you guys started to make your way to the car to put things away. you were the first to walk out, remember when you said everything was perfect?

you turned the corner and lo and behold cat and ellie are kissing. you let out a small gasp and just stood frozen.

“what’s wrong?” dina came out of the room and looked at the two.

“oh honey…” she pulled you in and you just stood there shocked simply because just earlier ellie was so lovey with you even asking to talk about what you guys were after the show.

“let’s go come on.” dina pulled you away and let jesse know that you guys weren’t going to come back in. you now had tears in your eyes trying not to openly sob in this hallway.

“you’re a fuckin idiot ellie.” dina stopped you both and you looked at ellie. she whipped her head around to dina wondering why the hell she’s saying this and then looked at you seeing you crying.

“what happ-“ before she could even finish dina pulled you away to the car. it feels like the world is in slow motion there’s so much going on. you want it to stop. you want everything to go back to normal.

…

@gold-dustwomxn

[prismaticpichu]

17, 23, 31?

You got it!! 💖💕

~

What fic meant the most to you to write? ~ EASY!! Candle in the Rain, no question <333 That fic is my baby shshshshshhdhd!!! Literally just a bundle of words that encompasses my favorite tropes and FF7 headcanon in existence: The power of FRENSHIP, mind control, Jenova brainwashing Seph, Nibelheim being saved, and Zack never giving up on his bud <333 And while the fic has some major flaws that I’ve come to notice today, I think what I find so special about it is that it’s one of the only fics where I just didn’t care 😂 Every sentence and every decision came directly from my heart—completely spared of any overthinking or self-critiquing. It’s MY personal catharsis fic, and I will love it forever <33

What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet? ~ Oooh, good question!! I’ve always wanted to write a fic wherein Zack suffers from amnesia on a mission, is captured by some ShinRa-hating enemies, and is fed horrible truths about Sephiroth in order to turn him against his best friend :,3c Definitely an idea that’s been sitting with me for ages lmaoooooo! And it ain’t going anywhere ❤️💖

What is something you recently felt proud of in your writing? ~ Bit of a sad answer, so I’ma keep it under the cut:

I’ll be completely transparent with y’all, I… haven’t felt a lot of satisfaction with my writing lately 😂 It’s been kinda tumultuous in the brain, and I haven’t felt like I’ve written anything that really clicks with me personally, or that I even feel particularly happy with. This isn’t to say I think my fics are bad!!! 💖 There are a decent handful I cherish, seriously. But I think it is safe to say that I genuinely struggle with being happy with what I create, as depressing as that sounds x,D And a lot of what keeps me going is knowing that I’m able to make people happy/engaged, even if I immediately glower at my screen upon posting a fic. It’s why so many of my fics are deleted; it’s why I anon over half of the ones that are not, because I can’t stand my name attached to works I can’t stand dhdhdhdhhd. It’s just kinda what happens when you’re in a mental program with one of the diagnoses being “critically low self-esteem” lmaooooooooo.

(Sorry… I know that was supposed to be a positive ask 😂💖 But y’all know I like to be honest and open here, and I think the honest answer is Nothing in recent time. But that doesn’t mean it won’t change!! The first step in being able to accept proper feedback from others is to be confident in yourself <3)

[xenon-demon]

WIP Weekend! 🖋️

So I've been tagged in various WIP games this week by @stobinesque @penny00dreadful and @steves-strapcollection - thank you all Very Much for the tags!! <3 (even if the tags were because I am an Enabler Of Fic, I recognise my true calling is to be a hype man and writing is my side gig lmao)

Anyway I have a reasonably free weekend this weekend and a BURNING DESIRE to get something ao3-ready. Also FYI these rules are a slightly modified version of the ones Sam (penny00dreadful) is using, because I am using the "Fuck It We Ball" approach and cobbling together all the various WIP games into something that will work for me.

🎆 Rules 🎆

In a reblog (or new post w/ rules attached), post up to five (5) filenames of your WIPs; not titles, file names.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to post!

After you’ve posted, people can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write 3 sentences in that file. If the filename is one you can’t share from (for example, an event fic), write 3 sentences on it anyway, and then 3 more on another to share.

That’s it! You can invite others to join in, or just post. If you tag me in your post, I will send you an ask request!

I am listing my WIP names as a poll; the poll will run for 24 hours and at the end I'll do the maths on how many votes each WIP received. I'll then set a goal to write 100 words per vote* for each WIP, and make a post of the vote breakdown for accountability! (*I may change this to be more than 100 words per vote if I don't get many votes in total.)

Snippet from "steve overstimulation projection manifesto" (SOPM) under the cut!

So yeah. Eddie can’t handle sudden change, big deal.

Steve can, for the most part; he's a lot more adaptable. No, Steve's weakness is people.

It took Eddie a while to realize it, and even then, he didn't truly understand until after they'd started dating. After all, how could the former King of Hawkins High possibly find socializing difficult? Eddie remembers all those bitter glances he used to shoot King Steve's way, jealous of how effortlessly he commanded the court of public opinion - not that he'd ever admit to it. But then Steve fell from grace, underwent more character growth than Eddie thought one man was capable of, and now Eddie knows the truth: uneasy lies the head that wears a crown. (Eddie is forever in debt to his freshman year English teacher for pointing him in the direction of the battered copy of the Complete Works of Shakespeare in Hawkins Public Library. If only poor Mr Collins knew Eddie was only interested so he could use it as inspiration for D&D campaigns.)

Steve is absolutely charismatic; he knows how to tell people exactly what they want to hear, or make them feel special in a way that keeps them coming back for more. The catch is it's an intentional act. It's a mask that Steve used to be terrified he could never take off, as he mournfully confessed to Eddie one night while sharing a joint in the trailer. As it turns out, Steve just needed better friends; with Robin, with the kids, with Eddie, he finds it so easy to just be himself. He doesn't have to censor himself or fret over what image he's presenting to the world, and can instead relax and actually enjoy the company. Steve's joked around with Eddie before that it's actually kind of good for their relationship that Steve used to have to try so hard - he knows how to flirt without even consciously thinking about it. What Steve doesn't know is that he could go into graphic detail about the shape of his toenails and Eddie would still be listening with hearts in his eyes.

—————

And now some tags, both for visibility and as an invitation to join in if you'd like to/aren't already doing a writing game for the weekend! <3

@sailing-through-hawkins @onirislanding @inairbinad @eriquin @scarcrossdlvrs @patchworkgargoyle

[hiccupbutpurple]

Wip Game

RULES: post the names of all the files in your WIP list, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it. And then tag as many people as you have WIPS!

Tagged by: @howtowhumpyourhiccup :D

I don’t think I can realistically do that many but @reallyprofoundkryptonite @worldwhightnight @sorushing @violet-moongem @amyrafierceblade if y’all haven’t already been tagged and feel like sharing! Of course anyone who see this and also wants to participate go ahead!

Imma put all the ones I’ve at least started writing for because we’d be here all day if it was also the ideas that just have a few dot points or things. Some have actual titles some are just random description type things lol. I put the general ship name or character in the title so I can easily find it but it makes it less vague ig but eh. (Also sorry this is kinda long so I’m putting in under the cut lol.)

- How Time Has Transformed You

- To Rediscover An Old Self

- Some Things Shouldn’t Be Admired

- Preparation – Vigcup

- Tired – Vigcup

- Hiccup and Gobber self-care reminders

- Searching – Hiccstrid/Heathstrid

- Knock - Hicclegs

- Improper use of Maces and Talons - Vigcup

- Swordsmanship – Dagvigcup

- Accidents - Hiccstrid

- One inspired by entertain – Vigcup

- Room Where It Happens – Hiccstrid runaway Hiccup Au 1

- Put on a show – Dagcup

- Lusty Confidence - Hicclegs

- So You Wanna Marry Hiccup – Dagcup

- Naga Viggo one – Vigcup

- Hypnosis – Vigcup

- Love it When You Hate Me – 3 Versions (Hicclout, Vigcup, Dagcup)

- Honesty – Hicclegs

- Hiccup comes out to Gobber

- God Au drabbles (Starts with when lighting strikes) - hijack

- Finding Wounds – Hiccstrid runaway Hiccup Au 2

- Survival confessions / Hiccup tells Viggo about savages ship – Vigcup

- Heather period blood insanity – vent fic + Heather

- Projects – Hiccstrid

- Jane Doe / Heather’s soliloquy

- Borrower Au

- Venomcup Au drabbles

- Humiliation – Vigcup + Heather

- Thrall - Hiccup

- Snotlout and Small Hiccup drabbles

- Finding Trinkets – Hiccup and Toothless

- Toothless and small Hiccup

- At a Spa - Vigcup

- Making Up For Lost Time – Stoick and Hiccup

- Viggo and Hiccup + Dagur on treaty signing day

- Rock me in - Hijack / Hicclegs

- Mala/Dagur/Hiccup

- Lovefool – Vigcup + concerned Stoick

- Hard Hitting – Hicclout

- Constantly on the Mind – Hiccup

- Half Runaway Au – Vigcup

- Viggo and Hiccup in bed talking

- Sex Puzzles – Vigcup

- Forever suffering for other people - Hiccup

- Spying – Vigcup + Riders

- Ghost hunt – Riders

- Hiccup see’s ghosts

- Ride - Hiccup/Jack/Astrid

- Obstacle Courses – Zephyr and Hiccup

- Who is the hottest – Drunk Hiccup stupidity

- Survivor – Vigcup og day one fic

- When the smoke clears – Dagcup

- ‘What if I have that berserker insanity inside me?’ ‘I want that Berserker insanity inside me.’ – Dagcup + Heathstrid

- Panic attacks – Heathcup

- Paints - Nuffink and Hiccup

- Burns – Hiccup

- Tango – Vigcup

- Saviour – Heathstrid

- Expendable – Riders

- Ships and Anchors – Valka and Hiccup

[suenitos]

Don't let them stop u sharing ur thoughts

I'd love to read ur ideas on isolation and cgnf :D

anon 😭🫶 ok I share just for you.. i fell asleep mid-writing this LOL

basically the post was about how most punishments on the smp are related to complete isolation (exile, pandora’s vault, the egg, limbo) and interpreted as a metaphor for COVID lockdown/quarantine (which makes sense given the years it was most active why and to me was an interesting way to frame it metatextually that i haven’t seen before). personally I don’t think any character’s story encapsulates this narrative/interpretation more than cgnf.

he doesn’t interact much with other characters outside of his dreams, he obviously sleeps a lot (having not much else to do in the main story or “outside”), the nature of his dreams is absurd and sometimes chaotic (similar to how a lot of us viewed world events primarily through social media with very little power, energy, or will to do much about it, with exceptions), and he himself progressively becomes jaded from being on the inside looking out (or within to his own relationships with characters appearing in his dreams, most notably cdream). he is literally confined mostly to his dreams (equivalent to our homes and imaginations, hobbies, or our screens) to experience any enjoyment/tangible emotion. In a way the dreams are much more appealing and possible to him than any opportunities to achieve them while awake. even if we take off the lens of covid to analyze his story it is entirely about isolation and how it seeps into every part of his (character's) life, culminating in a final stream where he wants out of this cycle (though, canonically he never gets to, hm?)

of course this is all just from the story provided to us by george and there are plenty of non canon character interpretations (irt cdream and dxd) and suggestions of events that do a lot of the heavily lifting in deeper cgeorge analyses. this is also not to suggest anything about real life george's mental/emotional state at this time/playing the character whatever the fuck (thats a different essay on just how much actors put themselves into their characters). just relatively surface level analysis of cgnf through the frame of real life event covid and isolation, because it was taking place at the time.

tl;dr: i hate that george lore has never been treated seriously in these interpretations of "main" story events. even if it doesnt seem that way his story is able to be interpreted in many different ways even if it is mostly completely isolated from other characters. CGEORGE FOREVER.

[goosewriting]

Dating Pyre

for some reason the ask disappeared from my inbox ;;-;; but luckily i had written it down. this was requested by anon (as a reply to this post):

In that case, I'd love general relationship headcanons with pyre? Just reader being all mushy mushy with him omg If this doesn't spark any inspiration though, feel free to ignore :))

summary: general relationship headcanons with Pyre

relationship: Commander Pyre x gn!reader

warnings: none

word count: 1.1k

A/N: im so sorry this took forever! i’ve been thinking about this ask every single day. i hoped that doing some good ol’ bullet list headcanons could get me back into writing, and i think it worked :D thank you sm for the request and the patience dear anon! hope you like it<3

(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)

— — —

Pyre likes to be in control.

He’s protective without being smothering.

He does have a reputation to uphold to after all, being a commander and everything

so PDA is off the table.

Any flirty comments and intimate moments are reserved for behind closed doors.

If you’re a civilian, he just straight up hires you so you can go with him wherever he’s deployed. You end up being his assistant, secretary or get a job at the hangar if you’re anything adjacent to engineering.

If you’re enlisted as a stormtrooper, he makes sure you’re always in his assigned squadron.

He definitely uses his position to make things easier for you if anything happens.

You’re not feeling well? He’s literally your boss, and you also share a bed, so he brings you tea and lets you sleep in.

Someone treats you unjustly? They’re getting a scolding from the commander before their shift ends.

You complain about it being a little cold in your office because the heater broke down and they haven’t sent anyone to fix it yet? It’s not only fixed by the next rotation, you also get an apology letter from the maintenance department. 

All these gestures to accommodate you don’t come without consequences, though; he might have received a warning or two from his superiors after pulling something which was evidently in your favour.

You keep telling him to treat you like all other employees, but he just can’t help it. He wants you to be safe and comfortable.

Which really stems from a deep fear of you leaving him.

Pyre isn’t necessarily emotionally constipated or unavailable, but he has trouble processing Big Feelings sometimes, especially when you’re nearby.

He’s scared he’ll lash out at you and take out his anger on you when a mission went badly, or when he’s having a bad day, and that you’ll be scared of him or even disgusted by him.

So before he gets to his quarters in the evening, he’ll try to let off all the pent-up steam; be it more proactively through physical exercises, or sometimes by lashing out at the poor stormtrooper that happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. He also may or may not have put a few mouse droids out of commission.

Since he does all this when you’re not around, it takes you some time to not only come to know of his actions, but even more to figure out what’s happening.

Once you sit him down to assure him that he’s allowed to have bad days and be frustrated and angry, and that you’re not going to think less of him because of it, he learns to deal with it better.

If it isn’t regarding any confidential missions, he might actually seek out your advice on how to deal with things, and you’re more than happy to help.

Once the doors are closed and the helmet comes off, though, it’s like he’s a different man.

When you sleep, he clings onto you.

He loves to wind down by sitting down on the floor between your legs with his back to you as you sit on the couch, his head resting on one of your thighs as you run your fingers through his hair, massaging his scalp. You tell him about your day while you do this. He sits there with his eyes closed and letting out the occasional grunt or sigh, but be assured he’s listening intently, mentally making notes here and there to ask you about later on.

Pyre is very thorough with the upkeep of his golden armour and equipment, and you’re the only one allowed to clean his helmet and blaster in the rare occasion he’s unable to do it himself.

As for pet names, if you’re into that, I think he’d call you sweetheart or darling. You mostly stick to his first name since you’re one of the very few who even knows it, but you like to call him Commander Tin Can when you tease him.

He’s also very attentive to your physical needs, and quickly picked up on your cues for hunger, sleep, etc. Sometimes it seems like he knows what you want even before you realise yourself.

As for himself, it took a while for you to learn how to read him. When in commander mode, he’s quite stoic and distant. But the moment it’s just the two of you, he relaxes. It’s subtle, but you learned to read his body language, and now you also notice when he comes home stiff or upset.

Once you both learn how to communicate properly, your arguments drop to basically zero.

Every now and then though, just to get a reaction out of him, you’ll place a kiss on the visor of his helmet after he’s done cleaning and polishing it; a little surprise for him to find the next morning. It’s always fun to see his conflict as he feels bad for wiping it away, but he’s also a bit rattled at the sight of his helmet not being spotless like he left it. He’d always walk up to you and tell you that “if you wanted to kiss him so badly, then you should do it properly instead”, right before pinning you to the wall and taking his sweet time with you.

All in all, Pyre is a pretty solid partner, always looking out for you. Of course, you try your best to return the favour, which mostly comes in the shape of words of reassurance and soft caresses.

One sure way to disarm him completely when you’re both in bed and he can’t sleep, is by placing kiss after kiss all over his face. The way he sighs and melts into your touch is intoxicating.

One time you were in the hangar talking to Pyre, talking something over before he leaves on a shuttle. Once you were done and he was about to turn around to go up the ramp to the ship, you said your goodbyes and a “take care, I love you” slipped out right as two stormtroopers were walking past you two with some crates. All four of you froze on the spot; it wasn’t a secret that you and the commander were a thing, but Pyre had made it clear from the start that he wouldn’t want this kind of interactions to reach prying ears or eyes. It was your first and only slip-up, so you were unsure of how he would react, and what to do. One of the troopers cleared their throat and carried on as if nothing had happened, the other one following suit. Once they were out of earshot, you were about to apologise to him, but with his visor cast down to the floor, he wordlessly took your hand in his and gave it a squeeze before effectively turning around and boarding the ship. Unbeknownst to you, that man was sporting a violent blush underneath the helmet.

~~~~~

[link to join the taglist in my pinned post!]

[nights-at-crystarium]

Fragments - episodes 12-14 author notes

Hi hello and welcome to yet another ramble about Fragments C: I’m doing these regularly because there’s so much I wanna say about my idiots, and I like looking back and appreciating the work I’ve done.

You can find similar breakdown posts on older episodes in my pinned!

I haven’t commented on any of the ShB episodes yet, so here we go. Chapter 2 is estimated to last for over a year real-time, it correlates to the msq events up to Amity. The name honestly I’m not too proud of, I didn’t wanna spend too much brain juice on it :’> But the cover.....

Obligatory ShB spoiler warning!

- Investigating each other. They’ve become completely new people since ARR.

- Despite what he thinks of himself, our lord and savior Crystal Exarch has the ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ grandeur ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆.

- Vivi’s self-image is similar, he doesn’t see himself as anything grand no it’s not a height joke but Exarch rapidly grows in his eyes as he learns about him.

- He sports an outfit I once doodled and found cute, I’m just being cheeky about his newfound obsession.

- He also appears fragile to Exarch, who’s literally seen a world where he died being this young. Exarch wants to protect him, to say the least.

- Vivi’s perceived helplessness and lack of agency in ShB, although it’s nothing he hasn’t already been through in his other WoL misadventures.

- The Light, of course the wicked white surrounding them.

Episode 12 I’m proud of writing-wise, but not art-wise. Turns out the Ocular is a bigger bitch to draw/paint than I’d anticipated, and, although I’ve mostly figured it out by now (having just released episode 16 for patrons), the colors and light in the episode 12 will forever stick out like a sore thumb to me, probably until I find the time to redraw it. Same goes for the Scions, learning to draw a whole bunch of new characters over a week (roughly, an episode takes 7~14 days to complete), well, I should’ve taken a bigger break and practiced some more.

I’d even apply the ugly word “crunch” to this episode. But ah, the best page wasn’t crunched, hell started breaking loose a bit later. Yeah I don’t work in order, usually I do the most important frames first.

A bit of a sidetrack: even though I sometimes find myself wanting for more time between episodes, I don’t think I can afford making the releases even more sparse, current 2-week cycle ensures that this story WILL reach its finale in some distant 2028 if not later, I’m not kidding, it might take even longer and I’ve only been working on the script for a year. The broad strokes are complete, but I indulge in adding more sweet nonsense here and there. Or sometimes a raw af dialogue pops up in my head and MUST be included in some chapter. In other words, help, this behemoth keeps growing.

Personally I’m loyal to my fandoms, and not in a rush to finish the comic, but my mmo experience bangs on that nothing lasts forever: I don’t know where the xiv community would be in 5+ years from now, and I need A LOT of people supporting me, allowing me to work on this full time. So I’d rather keep a steady pace while it’s still possible.

As I get more xp in painting backgrounds and learn all the ShB character designs, it should become easier for me. Currently I’m fumbling through a new field, so please bear with me :’D

Back to the main topic: I came up with and scrapped at least 2 ideas of the transition between ARR and ShB, the timeskip was always planned, but Vivi needed some more introduction still. Current iteration of Exarch “interviewing” the Scions seems the most fun and creative to me.

Also, tea parties with Urianger and Feo Ul :> They’re his only two friends in my hc, Urianger he purposely revealed himself to, and Feo Ul, merely being a soul in a sparkly shell, can see Exarch’s soul as well, hoods are useless. All while they’re somewhat reliable, truly the paragon of pixies who wouldn’t randomly spill his secrets (probably).

Vivi’s a mirror. Every single one of us is, to some degree. We react and adapt to the way the others treat us, and so does Vivi. Unintentionally, of course. It’s a natural “passive trait”. All the Scions except Urianger (for the same reason he managed to trick the pixies, he’s just a special smartass) see their reflections in Vivi, direct or warped.

Y’shtola is basically this:

Can’t promise equal amounts of screentime for all the Scions, but the twins and Thancred are the closest to Vivi, you’ll definitely see more of them.

He’s 26 now, which is still rather young by the elezen standards, and he’s way too tired (tm) probably like most WoLs at this point in time.

Maybe not of life itself, but he’s definitely sick of the Source and all its inhabitants. For all he cares, this place can go to hells.

His state just so happens to be perfect for the isekai love story that awaits him. How did he get there? I know, you’ll have to stick around until I deem it appropriate to drop some flashback episodes. I’m leery of loredumping too early on: firstly, you current readers will get more invested over time, therefore have more fun learning about him at a later point; secondly, I’m personally not a fan of tragic backstories right in yo face, before the main story gets a chance to breathe. And, mind you, Vivi’s past isn’t even THAT tragic, just, well.. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes \o/

In this episode I wanted to show his practical approach to things. He may possess an Echo, Blessing, soul stone and whatnot else, but gotta stick a good ol’ dagger in a boot just in case. He’s a doubter, just a tiny bit paranoid.

Also he has The Chair (tm) where he dumps clothes on. His room in the Rising Stones looks vague for now because we indeed don’t return there for years in real time, I don’t need to spend my energy on designing this room in detail just yet.

Most items don’t hold any special meaning, he simply prepares for a journey into the unknown. Well, there’s the journal he dumps his cringy thoughts in, and doodles sometimes. The trinket he holds here is a Princess Ai easter egg:

I talked about Vivi’s character influences and inspirations here if you haven’t seen yet C:

Exarch’s glorious meltdown does a good job averting eyes from Feo Ul being right there in the beginning of the episode 14, but yeah they’re present not for no reason :>

Mentally he’s still in the msq cutscene.

Gotta mention that there’s no amnesia, insanity, or other sad brain fuckery ever in this comic. Vivi’s head’s made of dense and sturdy stuff x’D

Just a meme I made because I had to :>

There isn’t much Deep Meaning in this episode, the visuals speak for themselves, and I’m DAMN PROUD of them.

We don’t see Exarch in this moment ingame, so I took my creative liberty to illustrate the range of emotions he goes through in like 5 minutes before finally rushing out to meet his hero in person, forgetting that he can teleport at will (yet another hc of mine) anywhere in the Tower’s vicinity, and doing so on foot.

That’s it for now, thank you for reading this and enjoying Fragments C:

[kotaka-kun]

Fanfiction Author Interview Game

Thank you for the tag, @missiemoosie, this was such a fun way to reflect on my work!!

How many works do you have on AO3?

284

What's your total AO3 word count?

395,574

Your top 5 stories by kudos/likes:

 thank you for the food - ATLA | rated T | 2,378 words | Zuko/Sokka

Simple Happiness - ATLA | rated M | 3,126 words | Zuko/Sokka

Bucky has a belly kink, but Steve doesn’t mind in the least - Captain America, MCU | rated E | 1,739 words | Steve/Bucky

Surprise - Captain America, MCU | rated M | 2,597 words | Steve/Bucky

New Colors - One Piece | rated G | 1,881 words | Zoro/Sanji

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Always! If I don’t respond the moment I get the email notification, I usually get to it the next time I’m on AO3 to upload a new fic... I do make it a point to reply after I’ve hit post though, because it’s like a reward to get to respond. Sometimes with the really sweet and/or lengthy comments that make me smile or feel really proud of what I’ve written, I’ll literally hold off on replying so I can experience the high again, right after I’ve posted a new fic. 

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Probably overboard -- I wrote it based on my first impression of the ending of the LOTR trilogy, where I took Frodo’s leaving for Valinor as a metaphor for suicide. 

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I don’t know that I can pick a single fic for this. I generally write happy endings, because that’s what I like to read, so there’s just too many to choose from. 

Do you write crossovers?

Hell yeah, I do! Crackfic crossovers are my favorite kind of self-indulgent fic to write. I’ve also written crossovers in the sense that I take blorbos from one series and put them in the setting or roles from another series, but then I wonder if that isn’t just an AU... 

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

I don’t think so...?

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I definitely write more smut than I post, that’s for sure. I think it’s generally all omegaverse, praise kink, breeding/pregnancy kink, light d/s... that sort of thing :) 

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope! At least, not that I’m aware of, haha

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, New Colors was given a Chinese translation! 

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I’ve co-written with my friend that I’ve affectionately dubbed beta-san ever since we got into writing fic back in high school. Few fics have been finished and cleaned up enough to be posted though. 

What's your all-time favorite ship?

I think I’ll forever consider ZoSan (Zoro/Sanji) to be my OTP... I haven’t read or written anything about them in a long time, but they’ll always hold a special place in my heart for being my gateway to online fandom and shipping communities. 

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

Bit of a deep cut for this one, but I’d have to say Zoro’s Promise. I started it so long ago that it’s still only on FF dot net. I do think about it often though, I won’t lie. 

What are your writing strengths?

I’m easily inspired, I use the intensity of my emotions as fuel, I find myself often wanting to write, I make time to write whenever I can -- on the commute to and from work, in bed, on a walk, etc. 

What are your writing weaknesses?

My brain only wants to write certain scenes of a fic, and has no interest in filling the gaps. I have a tendency to tell instead of show. I use too many commas. I don’t write consistently enough to make it a habit. I focus on the numbers social media has trained me to perceive as validation, instead of just being able to feel satisfaction from writing what I want to. And perhaps worst of all, I still care so much of what other people think of me, of my writing -- so much so that I overthink and overanalyze my words as I’m writing, forcing my brain to edit while I write, which is entirely counterproductive and also not what I’m here to do. 

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

As someone who speaks a language that too many people have Google Translated and then slapped into their fic for the vibes... hard pass. 

I don’t think I’ve ever written full lines of dialogue in another language. The worst I’ve done would probably be using nicknames, pet names, or endearments from canon, but honestly looking back, even that feels like I was pushing it. Unless it’s a fantasy language like Sindarin or Khuzdul or whatever else, I really feel like there’s no reason to be doing it. 

As a reader, it’s distracting at best when I can’t read it, because it takes me out of the moment and forces me to scroll down to the author’s notes to understand what it says -- or even just Google Translate it myself -- and at worst, I can read it, and it gives me a painful amount of secondhand embarrassment from how awkward and wrong it is. 

Just put the sentence in italics, imply that it was spoken in another language, and be done with it. 

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

My writing is at the mercy of my hyperfixations, so I don’t think I’ve not written for a fandom or ship that I wanted to yet... 

What's your favorite fic you've written?

I honestly don’t think I have a favorite. I’ve written so many fics at this point, and across so many fandoms, that I simply cannot choose one over the rest. 

Tagging: @lauralot89 @perplexedhedgehog @wheel-of-fish @backlitmademoiselle @flora-gray @from-aldebaran @intothemertensverse @textsfromthefifthbasement and anyone else that wants to use this as an opportunity to do some reflecting on your works!!

[gallavichgeek]

Fic Writer Interview

Okay I finally filled this out. Thank you @suzy-queued and @ms-moonlight-inn for the tag.

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 

Good old 49….hmm I wonder what lucky number 50 could be 🤔

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 771,726 👀

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Saving Grace (Which is now a published novel)

His Name was, Slave

The Ian to Mickey’s Cal

South Side Forever - this one surprised me

Sex Tape

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

All the time. I could easily leave an essay for a reply 🙈

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Two Kisses.

And to be fair I told everyone how angsty it is and they all told me to post it on A03 (I did a poll) and well, I guess they weren’t expected THAT.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Everything I write, besides Two Kisses, has a HE, the HAPPIEST, hmmm it would have to be either Hope or His Name was, Slave. Purely because they both have the boys going through a lot to get that happily ever after.

7. Do you write crossovers?

Not yet. Not sure if I would.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Have I ever 🤣 I just laugh because the hate is mostly idiot trolls or immature readers that didn’t understand what I was writing or read the tags.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Do I ever 😈😈 , I once wrote a fic where Mickey f*cks himself with his own d*ck sooo, not much is off limits. (Except 3 ways/orgies. No go!)

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

God, I hope not.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, I’ve had a few of my “fill in” s11 fics.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

With the wonderful @ms-moonlight-inn on our fic When You Call Unexpected

And I co-wrote The Ian to Mickey’s Cal, though the sequel I wrote by myself.

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Oh I will. I have two sitting away that I know I’ll eventually post.

15. What are your writing strengths?

I’ve been told many times that my writing is like watching a movie.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Taking a small idea and making it much larger than it needs to be.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Don’t think I could trust myself to know it was accurate.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Gallavich!

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

Nothing has resonated with me the way Gallavich has so no other ship has inspired me enough to want to write it.

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

That’s like asking someone to pick their favourite child. Or saying Cameron or Noel.

Hope has a very special place in my heart.

Obviously “When You Call Unexpected” for collab work

And I’m pretty proud of all the smut I wrote in OnlyFans